Worst adoption
Police in El Dorado say a teen-ager walked into the local animal shelter there in June, pulled a pistol, and robbed the joint. The take: One black pit bull dog. The suspect was later arrested while walking the dog, and was assigned a cage of his own.
Best characterization
From the obituary of Vergia Arnold of Sheridan in May: “Granny, as she was known to her family, made the best homemade rolls and chocolate pies known to mankind. She loved fishing, going to church, good gospel singing and working in her yard, but most of all her family.”
Worst bottleneck
In January, the Daily Beast website named a quarter-mile section of Interstate 30 around Exit 141 in downtown Little Rock as country’s 59th worst commuter traffic bottleneck.
Best headline
“Smoking groin lands two in custody” — from the KAIT (Jonesboro) website in June.
Best move
Officials in Little Rock agreed in June to move a bronze statue of a Labrador retriever in Riverfront Park which had been installed in a spot popular with wedding photographers. Problem was, while the statue was meant to suggest an animal poised to spring from a dock to fetch a downed waterfowl, many of those not familiar with the mechanics of dog-leaping thought the pooch appeared to be making a deposit, not a retrieval.
Worst near-permanent vacation
A tourist from Arkansas who was visiting Dodge City, Kan., in September almost became a resident of Boot Hill when he put a decorative noose around his neck for a funny photo op and then lost consciousness. A worker from a nearby museum had to rush in and save him.
Worst season in hell
The first week of August, which saw triple digits for days and record highs for several Arkansas cities. Little Rock set a new record of 106 on Aug. 2, then bested that by one degree the next day — the same day Searcy reached a Death Valley-like 108.
Best Confederate
That would have to be Loy Mauch, who was elected in November to represent Arkansas House District 26. A former commander of the Sons of Confederate Veterans post in Hot Springs, Mauch has called the Confederate flag “a symbol of Jesus Christ,” and belongs to a group that believes the South should re-secede from the Union.
Best of class
Vic Snyder of Little Rock, the state’s classiest and sanest congress-critter, announced in January he’d retire at the end of the year. Continued on page 14 www.arktimes.com • DECEMBER 30, 2010 13