Untangling the Web II: A Research-Based Roadmap for Reform

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The Donaldson Adoption Institute | Untangling the Web II

another described a case where a Korean adoptee located a birth brother who did not know he had a sibling who was placed for adoption. !

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Homeland tours and online searches are becoming more common for internationally adopted children and, in countries such as Ethiopia where birth and adoptive families are meeting each other prior to or at the time of placement, the opportunity for ongoing contact is especially present (Pinderhuges, Matthews, Deoudes, & Pertman, 2013).!

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Professionals’ Views of the Negative Impact of the Internet on Clients In the past, birth parent counselors spent time talking in person with expectant parents about their options, assisting them in locating needed resources, and supporting them as they made the most emotional and wrenching decision of their lives. For many individuals today, this counseling takes place online or via text, limiting the opportunity to establish relationships. Adoption professionals identified a number of concerns that impact their clients: !

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! The commercialization of adoption and the potential for pregnant women to be manipulated by online ads promising cell phones, apartments and payment of other expenses. ! “I have seen a LOT of advertisements for birth parents that promise things that we would never offer. We don't want even the slightest hint of any pressure or obligation with a birth parent, but they are enticed by these ads.”!

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! The lack of direct support for birth and adoptive families as they connect and as placement occurs.! “I believe that the lack of direct (person to person) support is the greatest risk. If there can be an adoption competent "go to" support for any adoption circle/triad member to discuss and process thoughts and feelings during and between contacts - I believe this is best.”! ! The vast amounts of information available about adoption, positive and negative, accurate and inaccurate, can overwhelm adoptive parents and put them at risk of sharing too much about themselves or their children. Distinguishing between good and bad providers can also be difficult. !

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! The ease and often instant response to online inquiries that adopted persons will move forward with making contact with birth family members before they are emotionally ready.!

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“Birth family connections can be great or disastrous especially if there are mental health issues on either/both sides. Connections are being made [between birth family members and children] before a child is emotionally developed enough to manage age appropriately… connections are being made without parental knowledge or consent.”!

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