divorced families
Pills look like the answer, but look again By Trip Woodard WNC Parent columnist
Health and wellness is an important topic to me, especially since our “health system” tends to be preoccupied more with sickness. After all, that is what most insurance companies pay for, and treatment systems follow money. Yet, study after study indicates stress is significantly intertwined with many ailments and prevention strategies are much more cost effective than “wait until a person is sick enough and then get help” strategies. This significantly applies to a host of mental illnesses that commonly show up in the therapist’s office. Take depression. When clients hear the word “depression,” it is not uncommon that they glow-
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ingly think about all those ads on TV that show a picture of someone woefully looking out a window with an expression like she has eaten way too much spoiled potato salad. (Anyone who has done so knows exactly what I mean.) Then the picture changes to the magical transformation that happens after she takes an antidepressant. Now, she is smiling, playing with the dog (usually a golden retriever), coloring with the kids and walking hand in hand with her partner across a green field. My clients take this medication, then become very disappointed they don’t get the same effect. Sometimes I remind them they don’t have a dog, kids or a partner in their life, so that may be a part of the problem. In all seriousness, I believe there is a place for antidepressants and they can be quite helpful in dealing with symptoms of depression. People just need to remember that pills don’t fix life.
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This is particularly true of people going through the transition of separation and divorce. On many stress assessment scales, divorce tends to rank high. It can be a grief process that never seems to end because the other person isn’t dead. To make things worse, the person you’re divorcing may be someone you have to interact with for many years because you share children. So, wellness and health strategies are critical considerations that need be put in place and periodically monitored. Here is a checklist I use with my clients (which applies to their children as well): » What are you eating? Imagine that on a given day, whatever you eat or drink goes straight to your brain. So, how does your diet affect your thinking and your mood? When you go to the grocery store, think of it as a square ring with columns in the inside. Stuff on the outside of the ring tends to be good