THE URBAN CONSPIRACY JEFFREY INABA
A covert organization has been plotting to take over mankind. The number involved is not entirely known, but estimates are in the millions. They are present throughout the Middle East, Africa, Asia, the Americas, and in greatest concentration in Europe. They are typically in their 60s, 70s, and 80s and claim to be ‘retired,’ ‘part-time volunteers,’ or ‘mostly spending time with grandchildren.’ Having been raised in the aftermath of WW2 and coming of age during the paranoia of the Cold War, these so-called senior citizens reacted to the treacherous battles for power by banding together behind a mission that is only now beginning to surface. The anguish of growing up amid political upheaval motivated this organization to form a world where discord ceases to exist. The immediate experience of witnessing extensive damage to urban areas has provoked this group of seniors to work through back door soft channels, in an attempt to make cities places of harmony. Their efforts are visible today in the form of parks, plazas, waterfronts, sustainable greenbelts, reclaimed infrastructure, farmers markets, bike paths, streetscapes, and communal gardens. It is no coincidence that we are experiencing an aging society at the same time as we are seeing an abundance of well-groomed parks. This population of seniors is regarded by some political leaders as “the greediest generation,” hell-bent on bankrupting the developed world’s social safety nets. But in actuality they have been posturing as self-centered baby boomers to conceal their efforts toward an unselfish social end. In fact, their counterculture rebellion as youths was a test to see if they could operate together in large numbers in the name of a single cause. It is likely that their frenetic consumerism later in life was also a smokescreen. They were plagued with an anxiety that more things would be destroyed and taken from them—–a feeling that stemmed from the profound trauma they experienced as youths. This first manifested in an unresolved desire to acquire consumer goods, but over time, they realized that hiding behind an aura of self-absorbed spending helped to divert unwanted attention from their humanistic intentions. Cleverly, they espoused a rhetoric of individualism to mask their true power in multitude. Who would have thought that this band of elderly—–part of an age group often thought to be removed from decisionmaking processes—–are trying to shape cities? Reports suggest the graying confederates have been waiting for this moment to make one final overwhelming push. They are using their advanced appearances to appeal for public spaces that benefit the elderly in order to achieve their ultimate objective of assuring the abundant proliferation of friendlier urban environments. Several observers indeed believe the expressed interest by some elderly in current popular notions of growing old is parallel in motive. Movements such as ‘Aging in Place,’ ‘Age Friendly Cities,’ ‘Multi-generational Living,’ ‘Active Aging,’ ‘Longevity,’ ‘Life Course,’ ‘Third Age,’ etc, serve as
Inaba
elaborate alibi that further cover their tracks as they develop urban land for general public benefit. The Urban Conspiracy (which has yet to be disproved) reveals that seniors are not a passive segment of society that lacks agency. It also suggests that inasmuch as this group is motivated to remain vital and engaged, they aren’t entirely sold on personal fulfillment ‘baby boomer values’. As the following events already indicate, they have taken sweeping actions in the interest of the public far beyond anyone’s expectation, let alone suspicion. First Europe, Then the World Most of Europe’s oldest neighborhoods (those with the highest number of retirees to people of working age) were severely damaged during WW2. Living at the epicenter of cities in ruin and growing up in a deformed urban fabric left such a psychic wound on these impressionable children, it paralyzed them from leaving. It was the fear that their urban surroundings might suddenly evaporate that inspired the invention of public space, which was specifically modeled to secure land ownership in perpetuity. Experts warn that these neighborhoods are likely senior strongholds with command centers that transmit plans to take over urban properties globally. Recruitment Improvements in medical care, diet, and environment are cited as the reasons for the rise in the number of elderly in recent decades. But the greatest headway in recruitment today has come about with the decrease in age at which one regards oneself old. Thirty and forty-year-olds are reacting against their parents by opting out of their forbearers’—–sixty is the new fortyyear-old’s worldview. They choose to act with extreme prevention in mind, convinced that living a maximum number of years requires acknowledging being old at a younger age. Certain that every slight physiological change in their bodies is a sign of aging, they have decided to start a longevity regime early on by living low-key lives of managed risk and even-balanced performance. The disinterest in wild youth-oriented living is boosting the number of people who consider themselves old ominously higher than birth year statistics indicate, fueling speculation that this organization is more insidious than previously thought. Resilience and Support In her informative model of aging, epidemiology and geriatric expert Linda Fried illustrates that as we grow older, we become less resilient to external forces. As a result, we rely increasingly on our physical environment to support our needs. Architects and industrial designers are attempting to create hospitable environments and keep up with the growing demand for senior-oriented products. But their efforts are overshadowed by unconfirmed reports that the elderly have been secretly supporting major architectural projects. Applying their knowledge of the financing models and real estate laws that they helped implement, seniors have been raising capital to acquire land
The Urban Conspiracy