Volume 6 - Issue 7 September 2010
Wo m a n ’s M a g a z i n e
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The articles that go in Sophie Woman’s Magazine each month just amaze me. I do read every single one of them. Some of course touch me more than others as I am sure it is the same with you. Often, I have people criticize some of the articles because of grammar, sometimes content and sometimes, I think, just to criticize. Most of the time, it is about the ones that I write and that is perfectly fine. You will never hear me say that I am a professional writer. I think that is what amazes me about the writers who share with me. Some of them are not “professional” writers either. They write from their heart which draws me to them. Take for example, Mandy, from the “Mandy’s Misadventures“. She is a regular Mom….well, maybe not regular, now that I think about it. See how my writing goes. I just start to write something and then my mind just takes off in another direction. I was thinking regular, meaning, just like you and me, and then it dawned on me that I could be meaning her digestive system which I don’t have a clue if she is regular in that area of her life or not. OK…Back to my meaning. She is a Mom with two wide open kids, handling life, day by day. That is why I relate to her when she writes about those day by day “things” that happen to all of us. This month, I especially love her little article. I laughed when I read it because of what was happening with her and yet, there was something else. It took me back. It gave me an opportunity to escape to my thoughts of years gone by. I loved Elvis! So, now you are asking…“What has Elvis got to do with this?” You will have to read her article to find out. I am pretty sure you will laugh and just maybe, you will be transported to another time or place. Forgive me if the only thing you get from it is a song stuck in your head all day. More than anything, though, I hope you will find something that makes your heart sing. Maybe this month, it won’t be Mandy’s article but how about Nicole’s? She is a professional speaker and I am pretty sure one day she will be a professional writer as well, but for today, she just writes from the heart. I am not going to say she is “regular” because you know where that takes me. One thing I know for sure, if you are a woman, you will relate to this. Actually, even if you are a man, you probably will relate, just not in the same way. Her article is absolutely wonderful. How she took something seemingly insignificant and gave us such a beautiful picture; I loved it! How can shaving your legs be a beautiful picture? Read the article and see if you don’t think about more than just shaving your legs! When you write from the heart and others read it that way…well, in my book, that makes you a professional. So how do you get the little “nuggets” out of the articles in Sophie Woman’s Magazine. Not so much in looking for the punctuation errors or for the sentences that just run on and on, like mine seem to do. Look for the smiles and sometimes the tears but always for the heart. If you do, I promise, you will always find a “nugget” that you can use to make you a more thoughtful, individual. Even though most of our contributing writers are “regular people”, just like you and me, I think they are extraordinary! Was we talking about …regular? Are you reading this in the “library”? Are you one of those people who just run…on and on? Thank you for reading Sophie Woman’s Magazine. You are so very special to us. I wish I could talk face to face with every one of you and be able to tell you how much we appreciate you picking up the magazine. Please tell others about it and remember, if they are not where they can pick up a copy, we are on the web. Remember also, if you have a story from the heart, we would love to share it. Just don’t expect to get paid.
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pg 4 / Sep 2010 / Sophie Woman’s Magazine
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s t n e t n o C
Message From The Heart..........................................................................................pg 3 Mandy’s Misadventures............................................................................................pg 7 Reaching Your Full Potential by Kim Fletcher.........................................................pg 8 Advance Directives by Casey Winebarger..............................................................pg 10 Give Up Worry by Leslie Sokol..............................................................................pg 12 The Fly Lady: The Nose Knows!............................................................................pg 15 Nicole Greer: Sophisticated Women Bloom...........................................................pg 16 How To Keep A Smile On His Patients’ Faces.......................................................pg 19 The Male Box..........................................................................................................pg 20 Girlfriends In God...................................................................................................pg 23 Truth & Beauty by Teresa Pope...............................................................................pg 24 Susan Guest: Why Environment Matters................................................................pg 25 The Front Porch.......................................................................................................pg 27 The Viewmont Street Strut......................................................................................pg 29 Dinner Diva: Back To School Tips..........................................................................pg 30 Shutterbuggerz Feature............................................................................................pg 32 The Sophie Shopper................................................................................................pg 48 Jody William: The Worse Advice............................................................................pg 51 Be The Candle by Naomi Drew...............................................................................pg 52
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sophiewomansmagazine.com / Sep 2010 / pg 5
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sophiewomansmagazine.com / Sep 2010 / pg 7
Fangirl Frenzy I’ve created a monster.
’s y d an
Misadventures
Wait, no, it wasn’t my fault, because I’m not really a huge fan, but it happened. I remember it starting when I sat Savannah down to watch a movie so that I could sneak a few moments to myself while the baby took a nap. I don’t think that the movie had been on that long when I looked up to see her in my doorway, with that look on her face. You know, the one where she’s really been thinking about something, and really wants some answers. So, I sat back and waited for her to ask me. “Mama, what’s an elvis?” I have to admit, I did not see that one coming. Of course I floundered for a moment, having no way to answer her question before finally deciding to simply show her. So, I pulled up “Blue Suede Shoes” on the computer and let her watch. It was love at first sight. I swear her face lit up, her lips fell open and she was in awe. Two days later, I had added about a million hits to a particular video on Youtube because Savannah was screaming “Again!” I decided it was high time she had her own album. We ended up getting her Elvis’ Number Ones album, which has become the soundtrack to my life, oddly enough. We would dance to “A Little Less Conversation,” (don’t you judge me), we would cry to “Heartbreak Hotel.” I would go to peek in on Savannah, and she’d be in the floor, singing “You ain’t nothing but a hambone, cryin’ all the time.” I didn’t have the heart to correct her. Plus, ham bones and hound dogs are sort of similar, right? I thought it had gotten weird when she was given an Elvis ornament by her aunties, and I feared I was going to have to throw it away because she used him to air her passive aggression, and he had a penchant for trashing the dollhouse. Then came the Jailhouse Rock Barbie Doll my mom got her. He wasn’t nearly as rebellious as Ornament Elvis, but he had to go everywhere we did. Next there were Elvis magazines, a few purses with Elvis on them, a beach towel we were recently given, a cook book entitled Are You Hungry Tonight? and finally some postcards with Elvis’ favorite foods to be used when Savannah decides she doesn’t like my meatloaf. Probably the weirdest part of this obsession came when my dad, of all people, told Savannah that Elvis had passed on. Savannah was talking to him on the phone one day, babbling on about Elvis and his songs and a recent movie she had seen with him in it, when I heard my dad say, “Honey, you know Elvis is dead, don’t you?” I swear time slowed down for me, and I ran for the phone screaming “No! Dad stop!” Surprisingly, Savannah handled it well. I don’t know if it was because she just didn’t understand the concept of death, but she really didn’t lose it the way I thought she would. Later though, I found her in the room, whispering to herself. Her face was so intent, and she was the most serious I had ever seen her. “Baby, what are you doing?” I asked her. “I’m talking to Elvis.” She answered. “It’s going to be hard but I’ve got to do it.” “You can’t pray to Elvis, Savannah.” I said, and she looked at me as if I’d sprouted another head. “Honey, you pray to God.” She bowed her head again, and said, “God, let me talk to Elvis, please.” Well, I’m glad I got that straightened out. Now I’ve just got to plan her Jailhouse Rock Themed Birthday party and find someone to go with us to Graceland.
M
by Mandy Thomas
pg 8 / Sep 2010 / Sophie Woman’s Magazine
by Kim Fletcher, Life Coach, Author, Speaker
REACHING YOUR FULL POTENTIAL:
“Schedule me for Erin Day!” OK, I will make a risky admission to my Sophie friends, whom I hope will remain friends after this bold confession… I hate all things ‘country’. Country music, western movies, cowboy-inspired clothing, big belt buckles… they all make me cringe! So you might have been surprised if you had found me last week at a local coffee shop cheering on my new friend Erin and her bluegrass band, Scenic Roots. I think I might have even tapped my foot a time or two. Before you think I am being inconsistent, let me tell you what compelled me to spend an evening under the drone of a mountain dulcimer, a fiddle and a banjo. It was Erin herself, once the national champion mountain dulcimer player… quite an accomplishment for a gal barely into her twenties! I may dislike country-sounding tunes, but I can also look beyond someone’s musical preferences to see the person behind the instrument. You see, one of my dearest friends has been ‘singing’ Erin’s praises for quite a while and I was looking forward to meeting this extraordinary young woman who is a beautiful picture of what it means to REACH YOUR FULL POTENTIAL. Shortly after being crowned national champion mountain dulcimer player just a few short years ago, this young gal from Kansas was presented with a new challenge… a cancer diagnosis, Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. We sat in my home, hearing stories of her ‘chemo days’ and how she kept her faith and joy alive while her life was being threatened. And it hit me that she has much to teach us about living. So here are three lessons I took away from her story that will hopefully mean as much to you. Please pass them along to someone you know who is struggling to keep hope alive in their own circumstances:
§ GIVE OTHERS A CHANCE TO SUCCEED: I asked Erin if she plans to compete again in the national championship. She said she thinks she would rather mentor the next winner and give someone else a chance to succeed. NO WONDER SHE IS CHAMPION IN ALL SHE DOES. Let this young lady’s humility, excellence and honor challenge you to live and work with others in mind… who can you equip and empower to succeed? Their success will feel like your own! This story has a great ending… ERIN IS CANCER FREE! She now travels the country with her dulcimer in hand, looking for ways to bless, encourage and impart her faith in Jesus to her listening audience. There is more great news… you can take these lessons learned from her life and make them your own. Share your stories and I will gladly pass them along to Erin. Kim Fletcher possesses the heart of a mentor and friend. She exercises this passion daily as she journeys with her coaching clients toward greater fulfillment and significance. She invites you to contact her today to learn more about how a coaching relationship might impact your life or the life of someone you love. She offers a FREE 20-30 minute phone consultation. Email or call today: kimfletchercoach@ aol.com/ 828 327 6702. To learn more about Erin, visit her website: scenicroots. com. To learn about the Life Compass fall conference Kim will be hosting on October 16th in Hickory, call today. You may also view a video clip from our 2009 conference at: lifecompassinternational.org.
§ KEEP STRIVING FOR EXCELLENCE even as you press through challenging times. The mark of a true leader is the person who keeps giving their all as Erin did even during those unexpected turns in life. Erin continued to live out her very best even as she fought for her life, encouraging her friends through a regular blog that allowed them to journey with her through several rounds of aggressive chemo. As she lost her hair and her appetite, she said she felt compelled to be honest about her fears and her struggles. She had nothing to hide and wanted others to learn from and be encouraged by her journey. § KEEP YOUR PASSIONS ALIVE AND CLOSE AT HAND as you navigate challenges at home or at work. Erin began taking her dulcimer with her to her chemo treatments to help endure the long, miserable hours. She said she always worried that her playing would bother the other chemo patients, but she soon learned that people were asking to be scheduled for their next round of chemo on what came to be known as ERIN DAY… the day her beautiful dulcimer would overpower the sorrow and the worry. Erin wasn’t playing for attention or acclaim. She was playing to bring comfort and encouragement to others, the same way she lives today. This is quite a challenge to any of us who wish to have a deep and lasting influence on those around us. What ‘sounds’ are emitting from your life? Is it beautiful music that draws others in? Do people long to be on your committee, to be your employee, to wish they were part of your family? Live so others want to be there on the same day you are!
Erin Rogers of Scenic Roots with her dulcimer
sophiewomansmagazine.com / Sep 2010 / pg 9
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pg 10/ Sep 2010 / Sophie Woman’s Magazine
Advance Directives: Speaking for You When You Cannot Speak for Yourself By: Casey Winebarger, Esq.
When most folks think of estate planning, death immediately comes to mind. Perhaps this is why so many of us procrastinate when it comes to developing an estate plan of our own. The truth is, though, that a large part of estate planning actually concerns planning for the possibility of future incapacity during your lifetime. With the use of a durable power of attorney, health care power of attorney, and living will, you can ensure your financial and medical decisions are made in accordance with your wishes in the event that you become incapable of making them for yourself. A power of attorney is a document in which you give another person, called your attorney-in-fact, certain powers to make financial and business decisions and engage in financial transactions on your behalf. Your attorneyin-fact is legally obligated to make decisions in accordance with your wishes or, if your wishes are unknown, in your best interests. You may choose for your power of attorney to become effective upon signing or, alternatively, it can be a springing power of attorney that does not become effective until the happening of a specific event. Typically that event is a certification of incompetence by one or more physicians. Your power of attorney must be durable to remain effective after you become incompetent. To be durable, the power of attorney must include specific language to that effect and must be recorded in the Register of Deeds office in your county of residency. You must satisfy both of these requirements; otherwise, your attorney-in-fact will have no power to transact business on your behalf in the event you become mentally incompetent.
If you become incompetent and do not have a durable power of attorney, a court will appoint a guardian to handle your financial and business affairs. Appointment of a guardian is a time-consuming and expensive process, and the person appointed by the court may not be the person you would have chosen for yourself. Furthermore, a guardianship is burdensome, as it requires the guardian to provide regular accountings to the court and to seek court approval for many transactions, such as the sale of property. A health care power of attorney allows you to designate a person, called your health care agent, to make medical decisions on your behalf in the event you either cannot communicate your wishes or a doctor determines
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sophiewomansmagazine.com / Sep 2010 / pg 11 that you cannot make those decisions for yourself. You may also use a health care power of attorney to provide specific instructions to your health care agent regarding the types of mental and medical treatments you do and do not want. In the event of your death, a health care power of attorney can also authorize organ donation and autopsy. A living will is a document in which you state your wishes regarding life-prolonging treatment in the event you suffer from an incurable or irreversible condition that will result in imminent death, are in a persistent vegetative state, or suffer from advanced dementia causing an irreversible and substantial loss of cognitive ability. With a living will, you may authorize or direct that treatments such as artificial nutrition, hydration, and ventilation be withheld or withdrawn in any or all of the above situations. Unlike a health care power of attorney, which is effective in any situation in which you cannot communicate your decisions, the living will is effective only in the three endof-life situations previously described. If you have executed both a living will and a health care power of attorney, you may direct within the living will document whether the living will or the decision of your health care agent controls when decisions about life-prolonging treatment must be made. If no direction is given, your doctors will follow your living will and ignore the instructions of your health care agent. A living will should not be confused with a Do Not Resuscitate order (DNR). A DNR instructs your doctors not to perform cardiopulmonary resuscitation (CPR) in the event your heart or breathing stops. In other words,
R
R
ED CEDA F A R M S
the DNR gives instructions with regard to life-saving measures whereas the living will gives instructions with regard to life-prolonging measures. If you do not have a health care power of attorney, your spouse may make your emergency health care decisions; a guardian must be appointed to make all other health care decisions. Without a living will, your spouse and adult children will make decisions regarding life-prolonging treatment. If you do not have a spouse or adult children, your parents (if living) or your siblings will make that decision. Your physician will make the decision only in the event that no next of kin or other person with a close relationship to you is available. Documents such as the durable power of attorney, health care power of attorney, and living will are the only way you can be certain your wishes are known when you cannot communicate them for yourself. Even if you are confident that your loved ones know what your wishes are and are prepared to carry them out, these documents will help take the burdens of difficult decision-making off of your family. While no one can know what exactly the future holds, you can achieve peace of mind today by planning for tomorrow. DISCLAIMER: The content of this article is provided for informational purposes only and is not intended to constitute legal advice. You should not rely solely on the information herein to make legal decisions. You should consult an attorney for specific advice tailored to your unique situation. Casey Winebarger is an attorney at Patrick, Harper & Dixon, LLP in Hickory, North Carolina. She practices primarily in the areas of estate planning, elder law, and business and corporate law. Casey may be contacted at 828-322-7741 or via email at cwinebarger@phd-law.com. Patrick, Harper & Dixon is Hickory’s oldest and largest full-service law firm.
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Give up Worry by Recognizing it as a Bad Habit By Leslie Sokol, Ph.D. and Marci G. Fox, Ph.D. Printed with Permission
Worry is made up of nagging, persistent thoughts that circle around in your head. It is “what if” statements, worst-case scenarios, and awful predictions. The act of worrying is an obsessive, habitual behavior-and one that you can give up. But before you can give it up, you must accept that the act of worrying serves no purpose. Worrying is stealing your energy, fatiguing your muscles and body, exacerbating your aches and pains, increasing your vulnerability to stress and infection, distracting you from the present, interfering with your sleep, inappropriately increasing or decreasing your appetite, and keeping you from more pleasurable or important tasks. It is time to recognize the act of worry serves no purpose and has become a bad habit. Here are 9 tips to help you put up boundaries around your worry. Control Worry, Don’t Let It Control You Instead of listening to your worrisome thoughts, intervene before you get caught up in an unhealthy habit. A worrisome thought that crosses your mind is a warning signal. This signal may be appropriately alerting you to danger. In this case, the appropriate course of action is to examine the concern. First, ask yourself what is the worst that could happen? Second, ask yourself if this outcome is likely and probable? Third, ask yourself if the outcome is a real problem? Next, only if the concern is likely and presents a real problem, consider all your courses of action. Last, evaluate each course of action, and a solution that makes sense. Differentiate Realistic Concern from Worry Realistic concern is a warning signal that you are in trouble. It’s the internal alarm system that indicates that you are indeed facing a difficult situation. Realistic concern is based on a specific upsetting, dangerous, or risky situation that you are NOW being faced with and are ill equipped or prepared to face it. For example, your computer crashed an hour before an important meeting and the vital information that you need is on your computer. Worry, on the other hand, is thinking about things that might happen now or later with no credible evidence to support it. For example, not returning a phone call to a client by the end of the day and worrying that person may stop doing business with you and taking it as a sign that you will lose many more accounts in the future. Even When the Weight Feels Too Heavy
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It’s important to determine if you are facing a genuinely worrisome difficulty that you have no control to fix. Accept you cannot take responsibility for everything and everyone. Often one is frustrated when a problem is out of your hands or you are delayed in taking action due to circumstances you cannot control. When there is truly nothing you can do about it, learn to tolerate the powerlessness. Remember that powerlessness is just a bad feeling. It will go away all on its own even if you do nothing to help it subside. Accept that bad feelings can’t hurt you if you accept they are necessary and temporary components of life. Tolerating bad feelings will make you a psychologically stronger person. Dig in and bear the discomfort. Make it a challenge and hold on
sophiewomansmagazine.com sophiewomansmagazine.com//July Sep 2010 / pg 13 Just the Facts: Knowledge Is Power
Be a Scout: Be Prepared
Thoughts pop into all of our heads. The key is to accept that every thought that crosses through your mind is not necessarily true. Worries are just fleeting thoughts that represent the concerns that preoccupy your subconscious. Before you let your worrisome thought wreak havoc on your system and stress you out, accept that just because you have a worry does not make it a true concern. Stick to the facts surrounding your worries. A key strategy is to ask yourself what evidence you have that the worry thought is true or not true. If the worry thought is true and based on real facts, then you can reign in your worry by examining your actual risk and reminding yourself of how you are equipped to handle the problem. However, if you find that you have no facts to support your worry, then it’s important to let go of it. Nothing in life is certain so letting go means tolerating that uncertainty.
Think back to all the difficult situations and problems you have faced in life so far. Have you survived? Of course you have, you are here! The good news is that facing thorny situations just leaves you even more prepared for the future. Knowing you have battled these tough times reminds you of how resilient and equipped you are for adversity. Think of all the problems you have addressed in your lifetime and tell yourself you are more than able to face life’s stressors. Your past has prepared you for whatever lies ahead, so remove the fear and let the scout in you lead the way.
Remember: Worry Doesn’t Keep You Safe Remember that you can’t magically ward off danger or risk by worrying about it. Worrying about something can’t make that thing happen-or not happen. By spending time worrying about the coulds, mights, and maybes, you’ll end up missing out on living in the present and enjoying just being in the moment. Worrying keeps you in your head and not fully engaged in living. Think about the how many precious, happy moments you may miss because you were distracted by worry. It can also unknowingly cause a disconnect between yourself and important people or situations in your life. Think about the time when you were so deep in thought that you had no idea that your son scored a goal, your daughter shared a loving comment about you, or your boss was telling you important information about an upcoming meeting. Was that worrying worth it? Don’t “What If” off A Cliff The “what ifs” of worry only serve to escalate the intensity of your anxiety and fear. Those “what ifs” are like snowballs that roll down a hill and get bigger and more threatening. The key strategy here is to not let your worry escalate by adding worst case scenarios to the picture. Stick to the specific situation at hand and gather as much information as you can to figure out the most realistic possibilities. It is much easier to deal with the known than to worry about things that are highly improbable. Rather than “what if,” deal with the “what is.” Think in the “For-Now,” Not in the “For-Ever” Luckily most of our choices can be amended. The question is, what makes the most sense at this point in time with the information that currently exists? There are no crystal balls and no guarantees of what lies ahead. Think of all the possible things that can happen to affect any given choice we make. If you accept that the choice you make was reasonable and valid given the information you had at that time, then you can avoid despair and frustration when that decision you made didn’t turn out for the best. Instead of kicking yourself, comfort yourself when things take an unexpected unpleasant turn.
Wear Your Invisible Shield A cloak of protection surrounds everyone. The name of this invisible shield is confidence. Confidence is what equips us to face difficult and stressful situations without worry. Confidence fortifies us to know we can make good decisions, problem solve, operate independently when we need to and get appropriate help when necessary. It is confidence that reminds us that we are capable of performing what life asks of us. It tells us we are competent and capable. It allows us to ask for help when we need it delay actions or decisions when we are don’t have the answers. Confidence also reminds us that each person is a unique, complex, desirable package. Every person out there has something wonderful to offer others. Believing in you means you have the most reliable shield of all, confidence. Leslie Sokol, PhD, director of education and one of the principal instructors with the Beck Institute for Cognitive Therapy and Research and Marci G. Fox, PhD, a senior faculty member in the Beck Institute’s training program, are coauthors of the newly released cognitive therapy-based book Think Confident, Be Confident: A FourStep Program to Eliminate Doubt and Achieve Lifelong Self-Esteem. They are both licensed psychologists, experts in cognitive therapy, and highly acclaimed national and international speakers.
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sophiewomansmagazine.com / Sep 2010 / pg 15
Many years ago I had a housekeeper come every couple of weeks. It would take me days to just get ready for her to come. The sad part was that I lived alone. There was no one to clean up after but myself. I had not learned the trick; that if you get it out then put it away when you finish with it. My life was in total CHAOS. Even though it would take me days to get things put away enough for my cleaning lady to come over. It was still worth everything I had to go though just to be wrapped in that beautiful clean feeling when I got home after a long day. I had spent most of my life chasing after mystery smells. You know the ones that greet you at your door when you have been away all day. My least favorite is the cat box smell. When you open the door to that odor; it is as if you have been hit in the face. How can anything that cute make such an offensive smell! That is when we try our best to cover up those smells with scented candles, potpourri and pine fragrance. We have some dirty little secrets. When we have hyper-focused on a project and let our house go to pot; we know how to look like we have been working all day. When we wake up from our obsession, we get every machine we have in the house going at the same time. We turn on the washing machine and run it again. That could be where that soured smell is coming from. Then we pull the plug on the mystery water in the sink and run a load of smelly dirty dishes in the dishwasher. After that we pull out our vacuum and sprinkle carpet deodorizer on the floor and vacuum it up right quick. We conveniently leave it in the middle of the floor so we can turn it on and look busy when someone pulls into the drive way. After that we light a candle and pour pine cleaner in every toilet. Does any of this sound familiar to you! I am here to tell you that I don’t live this way any longer. With my routines in place, my trash gets emptied. No more falling in the floor and knock you over with the smell of garbage in our home. My sink is not filled with dirty dishes and stinky water and my toilets don’t offend my nose when I walk into the bathroom. I no longer have potatoes and onions sprouting, science project growing in the refrigerator or that lone rotten potato under the sink. We use our produce and eat our leftovers. Money is saved and so are our olfactory senses. Nothing says “I love you” like walking into a home that hugs you! You can have this beautiful clean feeling too! Let go of your “I don’t have time” perfectionism and FLY! For more help getting rid of your CHAOS; check out her website and join her free life coaching at www.FlyLady. net , listen to her channel http://www.blogtalkradio. com /flylady show or read her books, Sink Reflections published by Bantam and her New York Times Best Selling book, Body Clutter published by Fireside. Copyright 2009 Marla Cilley Used by permission in this publication.
The Nose Knows!!
by The FlyLady Marla Cilley
Sophisticated Women Bloom
pg 16 / Sep 2010 / Sophie Woman’s Magazine
By Nicole Greer, PPCC Founder and Principle Coach at Vibrant Coaching
Frustrated, irritated and somewhat confused she stood in front of me demanding my attention. “Mom! Look at my legs. Just look at them.” I peered around the screen of my laptop and looked at her legs. “What?” I replied. “They are so hairy. It’s gross!” I took a closer look. While the hair on her legs was a lovely shade of sun-kissed blond against well-tanned legs from a summer full of swimming, I had to admit there was indeed a lot of hair. “I see.” I said feigning calm, not knowing really how to respond still looking down at her calves. And then it hit me. I said to myself, “Just downplay the idea that her
was another attempt to create an opportunity for me to help her grow into a new stage of life. What a gift! I was in a position to coach her through the process. I asked her a simple question that was begging to be asked. “Do you want to shave?” “Yes, please!” was her enthusiastic response. I thought to myself, “Although my gut reaction here was incredibly self-focused apparently my manners lesson has stuck. I put my work aside. Jumped up and said, “Let’s do it.” I am happy to report; no nicks or cuts just like the razor package promised. With smooth legs and incredible self-confidence, Katie has emerged from the bathroom. I am so grateful I had the privilege and honor to coach her into a new stage of growth. How can we help every woman we encounter bloom into her potential? • Move from a self-focused perspective into an other-focused perspective. • Listen to the heart of the women around you. What are they telling you that they want? Can you ask them a simple question that invites them into their potential? • What skills, history or experience do you have that another woman desperately needs to grow and bloom? • Move a woman from hopeful to successful with self confidence by joining her efforts and declaring, “Let’s do it!” Where flowers bloom, so does hope. -Lady Bird Johnson
legs are hairy. Tell her don’t be silly. It’s no big deal. Brush it off. You’re not ready to deal with this. For goodness sake, she is only eleven years old. This is your baby girl! You’re not ready for shaving. Shaving leads to make-up, and make-up leads to dating and dating leads to marriage and marriage leads to grandbabies and you’re not ready to be a grandmother!” In a split second, I had projected a simple conversation about shaving into a story of about me becoming a grandmother. Why was my instant impulse to minimize her strong feelings about wanting to shave? Why did the idea of her growing up threaten me? Why didn’t I immediately celebrate the fact that she was blooming right in front of me? Blooming is exactly what women are supposed to do! Every woman is born a little female seedling of potential. My role as mother is to nurture the seed. It’s simple really. Just water and warm the seed so the roots go down and the stem comes up to produce a beautiful bloom. And there she stood, just waiting for permission to open up and step into being a young sophisticated woman. I caught myself. This daughter of mine is intelligent, smart, and she has eyes with 20/20 vision. Plainly, she can see that her legs do need to be shaved. She had informed me previously on numerous occasions of the fact that other girls have started this rite of passage into womanhood. This
Nicole Greer, PPCC is a professional life and business coach. At its deepest level, working with a coach frees you to indentify your birthright gifts, discern your deepest passions, and fulfill your highest purpose. Principal Coach for Vibrant Coaching and Workshop Leader for The Lydia Group, LLC, a collaboration of individuals focused on work, life and spiritual growth, Nicole is on a mission to impact, energize, and influence people to lead a Vibrant Life by engaging the possibilities. As a life and business coach, speaker and workshop leader, Nicole views her role as a conduit to release all that you want to achieve. Join me on the PATH to move forward with authenticity, skill and confidence. www. thevibrantcoach.com/www.thelydiagroup.com
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“When You Smile, the World Smiles with You.” Dr. John Fish Knows How To Keep A Smile On His Patients’ Faces
Most of us have heard that old saying throughout our lives — but how does the world feel when something is wrong with your smile? For those who have problems with their teeth, mouths or jaws, smiling and eating are sources of embarrassment, stress and pain, not the simple pleasures most of us take for granted. Take Ann Burleson, for example. For 25 years, Ann wore dentures that enabled her to smile and eat quite normally. But when she began having severe bone loss in her upper jaw, Ann started having problems eating. She was examined by several different dentists, who told Ann that her bone loss would not allow her teeth to be replaced with dental implants. Worse still, other dentists refused to see her at all. Just when it seemed as if Ann was running out of options, she met John M Fish, DDS, who has had a full-service dental practice in Hickory, NC since 1983. Unlike the other dentists with whom Ann had consulted, Dr. Fish was confident he could correct her problem. Ann added, “I had consultations with two other dentists who offered little hope for restoring my mouth so I would no longer require an upper denture, which I had worn for over 25 years. How do you say thank you to such a great team who gave me back my mouth, smile and self-esteem?” Ann first underwent bone grafting procedures to her upper jaw. Several months later Dr. Fish placed her implants. Ann experienced no complications from the procedure, never had to go out in public while missing teeth, and was well enough to work throughout the entire dental implant and tooth restoration process. “Ann’s case was quite challenging, but the result was beautiful and has been totally stable for over five years” states Dr. Fish. “Ann has been extremely pleased”. Dr. Fish has been performing implants for his patients, as well as patients referred to his practice by other dentists, since 1983. “Our office is a ‘one stop shop’. We handle everything from implant placement to finished smile” Dr. Fish explained. “Our implants can support crowns, dentures, bridgework — whatever our patients need. We can do it all, from start to finish. That’s why our patients, as well as other dentists, come to us for help.” Advanced rehabilitative dental procedures like those Ann received often require the patient to be sedated during the procedure. Sedation can also be quite useful in performing more routine dental procedures on patients who simply dread going to the dentist. “Sometimes I see patients who have a lot of dental problem because they’ve avoided the dentist for years or even decades,” Dr. Fish said. “Sedation dentistry gives me the ability to complete badly needed dental procedures like fillings, extractions and root canals on patients who are extremely fearful of going to the dentist.“ Dr. Fish uses both intravenous and oral sedation methods that help control anxiety. Afterward many patients say they have little to no memory of the experience — a phenomenon known as “twilight sleep.” “Sedation dentistry really makes a big difference in the outcome of many patients’ dental health, “Dr. Fish added. “By keeping our patients comfortable and free from anxiety and discomfort during their visit, we can now encourage them to come back regularly so that we can prevent problems before they get out of hand and keep them healthy.” Dr. Fish’s patient Julie Epley says it best; “Now I can come to the dentist without dread and fear because they understand. I would never think of going anywhere else. Dr. Fish and his staff are a standard of excellence above the rest in my opinion.” In addition to advanced services such as implants, sedation dentistry, and cosmetic procedures such as bleaching, veneers and bonding, Dr. Fish also has his own on-site CT scanner that he uses for diagnosis and treatment planning. “Most of the areas we treat are below the surface of the mouth and can’t be seen or examined through visual inspection alone,” Dr. Fish explains. “Our scanner generates three-dimensional images of
the jaws, sinuses and nerves that enable us to identify and follow the most effective of course of treatment. It is especially useful for diagnosis and treatment involving dental implants.” Dr. Fish is pleased and proud that his practice provides advanced procedures and technologies that help rehabilitate patients with severe dental problems. However, he sees the focus of his practice as people, rather than technology. “We really take the time to get to know our patients — their history, their needs, their concerns — then we work together to plan the best course of treatment,” Dr Fish shared. “We know their names, we answer their questions, and we get to know them one on one— no matter what dental issue they may have. Every patient wants to be treated with respect, consideration and kindness. And that’s exactly what you can expect every time you visit our office.” “You absolutely cannot get any better care than Dr. Fish and his staff. He worked with me on different options, trying to get the best result that would satisfy him and me. People continually tell me how pretty my smile is.” said patient Becky Hawn. Dr. Fish’s commitment to pleasing his patients isn’t just talk either. “We bring our patients in for their first consultation at no charge,” Dr Fish stated. “I want us take the time to get to know each other so we can work together to make sure you get the results you want. That’s why I only see 8 to 10 patients a day, even on a busy day.” It’s comforting to know that your dentist has the experience, technology and confidence that few other practices can match — but it’s the knowledge that Dr. Fish cares enough to invest the time to get to know you as a person that really puts a smile on his patients’ faces.
What’s My Story? “I wore a partial for years and hated every minute of it. I was told there was no hope. Now, I can’t stop smiling. If you’re thinking of having implants done — DO IT! Call Dr. Fish, the sooner the better.” -- Andrea Foxx Morganton
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pg 20 / Sep 2010 / Sophie Woman’s Magazine
THE
MALE BOX by Wayne DeLoriea
Well, it’s September…ALREADY!! Where is this year going? It seems only a couple of months ago when the NASCAR season began and my friend Jamie McMurray won the Daytona 500. I was never lucky enough to win the 500, but I did go to Victory Lane for the 400 in 2007… with none other than Jamie McMurray and the Roush-Fenway Irwin Tools team. What a thrill!! Now that we have gotten the kids back to school and settled into our own routines for Fall and the holiday season…that is quickly approaching, I hope you had a great and memorable summer. But wait…in my mind the best is yet to come. Romance is just around the corner when a chill fills the air, leaves grow vibrant and the football, soccer, and cross country seasons start!!! What’s more romantic than sitting with the girl you love wrapped in a blanket on the bleachers watching our own up and coming athletes hone their skills at life by playing their hearts out in an attempt to be the best and in the doing…entertain us? Did you know that we have some of the best local area athletes in the state? Maiden, Newton-Conover, Hickory and St Stephens are closest to me and let’s not forget the LR Bears. As a graduate of that fine University I say, “GO BEARS!!” If football is not your cup of tea…or her tea…remember the mountains as they unveil their spectacle of colors with their hiking trails and waterfalls. Guys, she IS worth missing a game for. Pack a picnic and surprise her with a trip to the top of Mt Mitchell or Grandfather Mountains. If she’s into hiking, take her to Table Rock. These are some of the most romantic places to take the girl in your life. Imagine the air’s chill on your cheeks as you look across a spread blanket of Fried Chicken and your favorite fixin’s, looking into the eyes of the love of your life. For that moment…you’ll be her hero, her knight in shining armor again. What guy isn’t into that? Spend the day recalling the wonder in life, those special moments that brought you both together and remember to laugh. Take pictures of the both of you…it doesn’t matter if it’s the worst photography in the world … it will be the best, to her. You CAN do this and you SHOULD do this…it’s just a day to you but it’s what makes the lights come on for her and it could be a turning point for you as a couple. She needs these days. It’s what charges her batteries. Her mental health needs this as much as your mental health needs the next Stallone movie. Take a football, camera, blanket, your favorite picnic food, your sense of humor and slow your life down for her. Take pictures, laugh, toss the football and pick flowers…throw open that big honkin’ door to your heart and love her…and in the same moments, love yourself … you’re a great guy or she never would have married you. You THINK you chose her… but you didn’t. As for me…I have a house full of women…I swim in a sea of estrogen. That’s how I know all this stuff…you can trust me boys…this is what it
is to be a man, a REAL man. You’re never more of a man than when you’re taking care of the physical and emotional needs of those around you. Anyway, I am taking my girls to Maine for a few days. We’re going to visit some of the most beautiful little fishing harbors and lighthouses in the world. I want to put on a big thick sweater, hold Linda’s hand and walk with her along some deserted beach. Trust me guys…I’ll be doing the picnic thing.
Owner & Operator of The CORE Fitness Studio, NASCAR Coach, Master Fitness Instructor, Personal Trainer and Sports Nutritionist Wayne DeLoriea, One of NASCAR’s most successful and decorated coaches, certified in 79 countries around the world and author of Coach Without A Whistle joins forces with Healthy Lifestyles to help you realize your nutrition and fitness goals.
sophiewomansmagazine.com / Sep 2010 / pg 21
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Some of the people who enjoy the benefits of our Birthing Center’s Five Star rating.
We recently received the good news that HealthGrades, the nation’s leading independent healthcare ratings organization, has given our Birthing Center the highest possible rating for quality of care of moms and babies. Catawba Valley Medical Center is the only hospital in the Hickory region to receive Five Star Designation. HealthGrades scoring is based on maternal complication rates and neonatal mortality rates (find out more at healthgrades.com). A HealthGrades rating is important because it helps consumers and employers make decisions on which hospitals and physicians to choose. But good ratings are nothing new to Catawba Valley Medical Center. We’ve received three Magnet Awards for nursing excellence and three J.D. Power and Associates Distinguished Hospital designations, honors that were brought about by a constant striving for excellence among our physicians and nurses. So if you’re planning on bringing a little one into the world, consider Catawba Valley Medical Center, where babies and moms get the tender loving care they deserve.
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sophiewomansmagazine.com / Sep 2010 / pg 23
The To-Do List Abyss
Your list looks different from mine. We all have unique ministries, friendships, jobs, responsibilities, and families. Whether you are in the work force, unemployed, or retired or a stay-at-home mom, a single mom, or an empty nester - a wife, a widow, a single woman, or a divorcee - God can and will give you strength for each day when you prioritize Him and fear Him. Consider the following verses:
Gwen Smith
Today’s Truth
Proverbs 31:17 (NIV) “She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks.”
“Are you so foolish? After beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort?” (Galatians 3:3, NIV).
Friend To Friend
Many of us check off neatly penciled boxes. Some draw lines through the tasks we’ve finished. A select few of us even add tasks that we’ve already completed to our list so that we’ve got accurate accomplishment records at the end of the day! (Present company included!) Some of us keep track of what we need to do each day in our heads, while others track progress of daily goals electronically. There are days I fluff up my list. Instead of simply writing, “Do three loads of laundry,” I’ll create twelve list items to check off that read: q Wash whites q Dry whites q Fold/hang whites q Put away whites q Wash colors q Dry colors q Fold/hang colors q Put away colors q Wash darks q Dry darks q Fold/hang darks q Put away darks
“Do you not know? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint” (Isaiah 40:28-31, NIV). God longs to strengthen your arms for the tasks on your to-do list today. Place time with Him as your first priority. Check your God-box. Go to Him now. Pray. Listen. Call on Him for direction, wisdom, renewal, and strength. Strong arms await you, girlfriend!
Let’s Pray
God, I was created by You and for You. Please forgive me when I rush into a day without calling on You for my strength. I need you, Lord. Please prioritize my heart and my list today. In Jesus’ Name I pray, Amen.
Oh, how I love to check boxes! Why? I want to be productive woman. I want my work to matter. It’s pretty much a daily struggle for me. As an eternal optimist, I wake up anticipating that the seconds, minutes, and hours of each day will bend to cooperate with the demands of my list. Yeah, right. I’m such a dreamer. It just never seems to work out that simply or efficiently. I’m guessing that you are in this daily struggle with me. Right? No matter what it looks like, thinks like, or prints off like, many of us feel overwhelmed by the abyss of a rarely satisfied to-do list. We face constant demands that call to us and vie for our attention. We sift through the essentials and the fire drills, then we go to bed, wake up, and do it all again. The abyss of a to-do list can be so exhausting! The good news is that we don’t need to face our lists alone. God offers to come along side of us daily to provide the strength, perspective, and wisdom we need. In the Bible, we read of a woman who approached each day with God-power and God-perspective: “She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks” (Proverbs 31:17, NIV). Though this is an impressive statement about her work ethic and though it seems this fictional woman dominates her daily to-do list, it’s important to consider the source of her strength: God. At the end of the chapter, Scripture shows us that she “...fears the Lord...” (Proverbs 31:30, NIV). Her source of strength is rooted in faith and in her dependence on God. Ours should be, too.
Now It’s Your Turn
Read Proverbs 31:25-26: “She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.” How closely do you relate to the above verse? What steps need to be taken in your life to move toward a deeper dependence on God’s strength verses your own? Are you willing to go there? Take a moment to talk to God about it. Seeking God? Girlfriends in God P.O. Box 725 Matthews, NC 28106 info@girlfriendsingod.com www.girlfriendsingod.com
pg 24/ Sep 2010 / Sophie Woman’s Magazine
Located in Downtown Newton
TRUTH
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by Teresa Pope, Esthetician
Modern shopping with small-town charm 200 N Main Ave Newton, NC 28658 828.466.1976
hours: wed-sat 10am-6pm Tailgating & Collegiate merchandise tervis Tumblers Jewelry BABY gifts LILLY Pulitzer Giftware
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Barbara, “Thanks for giving my life back 100% and for such good care. It’s just so wonderful to hear again......the birds singing, the TV without deafening the rest of the family and especially my granddaughters saying I Love You in the other room. Life is great to be able to hear again.” ~Joyce Winkler - Hickory, NC
& BEAUTY
Question: My lashes are so thin and short, even when I wear mascara, it is hard to see them. My question is: Does Latisse really work? It’s sort of expensive and I don’t want to buy it, if it doesn’t work. Answer: Get your credit card ready to purchase your Latisse, because it really does work. How it works, no one is really sure. It was discovered by accident, when people who were being treated for glaucoma were also growing very long, thick lashes. Lattisse is an FDA approved, prescription only, treatment for Hypotrichosis (the medical term for “not enough lashes”) Latisse is used once per day, applied directly to your lash line, just like you were applying eyeliner. You will begin to see results gradually and will see a significant improvement in about 2 months. However, each patient is different and some show results much faster while others don’t see results for a much longer time, but you will see results if you continue to use the product for at least 3 months. The side effects of Latisse are minimal to nothing at all. The most common side effects are itching, redness, dryness, redness of the eyelid. The ad’s say that it may cause skin darkening, and brown iris pigmentation, but I am told this is extremely uncommon and is simply mentioned as a risk factor to completely inform patients of “might” happen scenario’s. People who have a history of eye pressure problems, who are taking medications to lower their intraocular pressure or persons with glaucoma or any other eye condition should speak to a specialist before starting Latisse. My personal experiences with Latisse have been favorable. I have seen some clients grow tremendously thick, long, dark lashes that looked amazing, while others, including myself showed a substantial difference, but nothing like others. The only way to find out which group you will be in is to try it yourself. Even if it turns out that you are in my group of growers, I believe you will still enjoy your new, longer, thicker lashes.
“Please see us before you buy!”
Please submit questions to Teresa Pope @ Alabaster Healing 20021 1st. Ave. NW Hickory, NC 28601 828-322-8380 *Individual has not been compensated.
sophiewomansmagazine.com / Sep 2010 / pg 25
Why Environment
Matters
by Susan Guest, ASID
Years ago, I went through a difficult time where I felt trapped in a life that was way too busy and fast--sort of like being on a train that would not stop. After hiring the services of a life coach, I learned that one of my “issues” pertained to physical environment. For a designer who is supposed to have everything under control, how did I let this happen? Peeling paint, untrimmed bushes, and unorganized areas of my home actually drained energy from my body. These things revealed a life that was just as busy and out of control. Who would have thought! I still have unkempt flower beds and closets full of clutter; but now know that they adversely affect my productivity and mood. This knowledge has made me more sensitive to clients’ needs for order and function. • • • •
There are several reasons that your environment matters: An uncluttered work space helps un-clutter your brain and releases your creativity. A well arranged area is safer because it offers a clearer means of egress (a better exit) if you have an emergency such as a fire. Also, you are less likely to trip and fall if your space is tidier. Your apartment, home, or office reveals who you are as a person. It might also state who you want to be or wish others to think you are.
• • • •
For some people, their environment is a creative outlet. They love to clean, shop for “treasures” and feather their nest. If you entertain often for business or pleasure, the appearance of your home can aid in whatever goal you are trying to achieve. A house that is in mint condition and well-presented tends to sell faster than one that is not. Sometimes a change in your environment is needed. Sometimes a change from your environment is needed. When I am bored or unhappy with my home, just taking a trip away or helping those who are less fortunate, make my home seem more wonderful.
So, as you can see, it is not selfish to have beautiful surroundings. If you need assistance, I know a great designer who can help. Susan Guest, ASID is an awardwinning interior designer in Hickory and owner of Guest Interiors, LLC. She is one of the designers featured in “Spectacular Homes of the Carolinas”, found in high-end bookstores around the country. For more information, visit www.guestinteriors.com.
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FrontPorch The
by Judy Smith
Football games are over! Yippee Do Dah Day! The other day when I was talking to my youngest grandson about school starting, my heart nearly stopped beating. For the last many years, when school starts, so does football. Don’t get me wrong. I love football….sitting in front of my TV, feet kicked up and if I doze off, hey, that is a good thing. I have TIVO or Moxi or what ever that gadget is called. If I really want to see if I missed an important play, I just hit the reverse button. Now that is the way I like to watch football. The Water boy’s mother said that “foozball wez the debil”. I am here to tell you that Foozball isn’t de debil! It’s sitting out in all kinds of weather that is “de debil”. My husband and I have done our share of that. Being the adoring grandparents that we are, we sit thru heat, torrential downpours, sleet hitting us in the face, flurry’s of snow and temperatures dropping below our toes freezing levels. Many a night, we hauled our “football gear” and trucked miles and miles just so our grandson knew we were there. Quite a few of those nights, I would ask myself; Why? I would rush my husband out the door, asking him to sacrifice a really good meal for a slim, reddish color wiener in a stale bun with nothing more than a little pack of mustard or ketchup. If he was lucky enough that it didn’t rain and he got to wash it down with a soda instead of it turning into something dripping from his hands, well, it just had to be. We had to get there early so the boys knew we were at the top, in our spot, ready to cheer them on. Cowbells, clappers, air horns, and the all important #1 hand were just part of our must haves. I will let you in on a little secret just in case you don‘t know this. Sometimes, some really rude folks will use that #1 hand to mean something else but you just need to ignore it. You would think all of those things were enough but we were just getting started. Boy scouts teach you to “be prepared” and we wanted to make sure we were prepared for anything. Just because it starts out warm weather, does not mean it will finish up that way. We always had to make sure we had extra socks, gloves, toboggans, scarves, coats, waders, rain ponchos, blankets, hand and foot warmers. Even fanny warmers. Those bleachers can get mighty cold and uncomfortable. That is why you need extra padding other than what you naturally have on your body, if you know what I mean. Now let me ask you…Who can sit on concrete or steel bleachers? Not us and not many other people that I know of. It is a good thing they don’t charge extra for all the seats, blankets and cushions that are carried in just to sit on. I loved it when they started putting straps on chairs. That just freed up my arms for more things to carry. Why did we do all these things? For all the big moments that happened. The thrill of Victory is building. We are anxiously waiting for the team to run onto the field through fog, through banners and tinsel flying in the air, waiting…waiting….waiting! Yes there he is, our grandson. I am praying he looks and sees we are there to support him, to cheer him on. It doesn’t matter to us if he makes the big plays or sits on the bench. We are there. He looks up our way and my heart leaps with pride and I give him a big wave so he knows we are there. Then I wait for the return wave or look of joy on his face that tells me he is so proud his grandparents are there. Oh no…he didn’t return the wave. Maybe I need to holler out his name. Maybe he didn’t see me. As loud as I can, I call out. He didn’t just ignore me right then did he? Surely he was not embarrassed. What am I talking about….I KNOW he just did not see me! So when we think of school starting, we think football. Not this year!!!! My grandsons graduated and are off to college…not playing football. The wonderful thing is that our youngest grandson doesn’t play football. He loves basketball. A game that is played in a gym with the comfort of things like heat and no rain! We still have a dilemma though. What am I going to do with all the football paraphernalia? I am just going to have to gather it all up, find a football grandmother who is not as prepared as I was and pass it on. Maybe her grandson will not miss seeing her and wave back. I know her heart would be thrilled! One really horrible thought just came to my mind. The rest of the grandkids are girls. Oh, please don’t tell me they might be cheerleaders. I guess I won’t be passing off my football paraphernalia after all. We may have more winters ahead of us. Hopefully, they will wave back and warm a grandmother’s heart! GO TEAM!
sophiewomansmagazine.com / Sep 2010 / pg 27
Unafraid To Act on an Idea & Make A Difference by LeAnna Graves
Often it seems that one person, or even a small group of people, can’t really make a difference. Time and time again, this thought is proven wrong, as evidenced by the following story. Each of us are full of ideas. Some of the ideas may seem random, some may be considered insane, and some may be pure genius. It is the idea that moves beyond the initial spark into action that creates great things. That is why we now have SillyBandz and the Snuggie. But, is it also thanks to someone being unafraid to act on an idea that we now have electricity, energy efficient appliances and the internet. One recent idea that started as a spark among friends has now grown into a community-wide event, uniting area businesses in Hickory, NC. The Viewmont Street Strut, a celebration of the diverse nature of the community is happening in Hickory, NC, on Saturday, September 25. The 1st annual Viewmont Street Strut is a day long event, designed to allow neighbors to gather and sample the wide assortment of restaurants and shops, right here in our own back yard. It will also showcase many extremely talented artists and musicians who live and work in the area. “This is going to be a great way for our friends and customers to sample the variety of talent, food, and different types of shopping that is available in the Viewmont area” said Debra Whitson, of Warehouse 2120. There is going to be a full day of entertainment, food, games, art and special sales at area stores. The list of businesses that are participating keeps growing every day. Donna Price, from Bumblebee Interiors, shared that she is looking forward to the Street Strut. “This is an excellent opportunity for area businesses to bond with each other, and give the community a chance to support our local economy, ” she said. Every company is going to be doing something different to celebrate that day; so plan to start early, and finish late! There are going to be wine tastings, decorating demonstrations, live entertainment, free food, special sale discounts, fun activities for the kids, Sparky the Fire Dalmatian, and so much more! “We are allowing local artists to display their work, and are having a special tasting event of our gourmet beers for you to enjoy” said Margie Rapp, of Café Gouda. So, let’s all get together and support those who are not afraid to act on their ideas, making a difference in our community by attending the Street Strut. Together, we can make small ideas become great things, and all while supporting our neighbors.
Top Ten Reasons Why Shopping Local Is A Great Idea • Supporting local business supports my neighbors. • It makes my community unique, responding to my needs. • I get better service from someone I know. • It creates and keeps good jobs in my hometown. • Local businesses support local non-profit groups. • It promotes competition and diversity among businesses. • Shopping local lowers the impact on the environment. • It generates local sales tax money. • Money that is spent locally stays local. • My hometown is important to me.
Annual
Strut
Ace Hardware American Upper Cervical Spine Clinic Backstreets Bar & Grill Benjamin’s and Libba’s of Hickory Bistro 127 Bumblebee Interiors Café Gouda Copperbean Coffee CrossFit DaVinci’s Restaurant Deborah’s Gracious Gifts England Brothers Platinum Detailing Firehouse Subs Frankie Bruno Salon Harrisburg Music and Trading Co., Inc. Health Hut of Hickory Hen & Chicken Papers Hickory Acupuncture Hickory Fireplace & Patio Java Journey Lazy Dog Saloon Lisa’s Hallmark Mountain 1st Bank & Trust Need A Tan Paw Tales Razzberries Reflection Church Residence Partners Richard Anthony Hair Rita’s Italian Ice Salsarita’s Fresh Cantina Social Butterflz & Gifts The Jagged Edge Unique World Gifts Viewmont Auto Center Viewmont Eye Associates Viewmont Service Center Village Kitchen Violets & Martinis Warehouse 2120 Wild Birds Unlimited Windy City Grill (Homer’s) Youssef’s 242
Back To School Tips
pg 30/ Sep 2010 / Sophie Woman’s Magazine
By Leanne Ely CNC
The Dinner Diva
The school cafeteria has become a place filled with poor diet choices. From franchise fast food offerings to soda machine temptations, today’s kids are faced with a lot of less than healthy choices at lunchtime. So what can parents do? They can pack a healthy lunch! But many parents could use some help. The typical child’s lunch box is often filled with fat, sugar and salt and lacking healthy fruit, vegetables and whole grains. Healthy lunch boxes are just one way to help reinforce healthy eating in childhood when eating habits are being formed. Instilling healthy eating habits is more important than ever as child obesity rates have soared in recent years! The key to a healthy lunch box is balance. Having a decent protein/ carb ratio in your child’s lunch box will help them finish the day with energy to spare. Here are my top 5 tips for packing a healthier lunch box. 1. Wipe Out White Bread. Breads made with whole grains are better sources of fiber and keep your kids feeling full longer. They also have more of other important nutrients, such as selenium, potassium and magnesium. The good news is that it’s easy to find whole grain options at grocery stores for everything from bread to crackers to tortillas. I’m nuts about Rudi’s Bakery. My kids love their breads and they have the soft mouth feel of white bread. 2. Choose Cheese. Cheese is a good way to give your child a little fat (choose the low fat varieties) and protein. String cheese is a fun snack that you get to play with.
napkin for protection. Apples, peeled oranges and grapes make great lunch box additions as well. Sprinkle cinnamon on apples for extra flavor and disguise the natural browning process.
3. Don’t Skimp on Fruit. Swap fruit for sugary snacks that cause kids’ energy lives to nosedive after launch. Bananas are great for lunch boxes. They are convenient, a great source of potassium and come in their own carrying case. Pack it on the very top and wrap in a
4. Skip the Chips! Most kids feel their lunch box isn’t quite packed unless there are chips aboard. Parents know most store-bought chips are not the healthiest food around. Baked tortilla chips are a good option or even better are baked pita chips, which are easy to make at home. 5. Be Choosey About Beverages. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics drinking too much juice (yes, even 100% fruit juice) can contribute to everything from cavities to childhood obesity, not to mention the discomfort of gas and bloating! Get your child into the good habit of drinking water. Try freezing a bottle of water instead of the usual juice box and flavored drinks and skip soda altogether. The bottle will keep the lunch box cold and will be thawed by lunchtime!
Leanne Ely is a New York Times bestselling author of Body Clutter and the Saving Dinner series. The Dinner Diva syndicated newspaper column appears in 250 newspapers nationwide. Learn how to cook great and save significant money with the Dinner Diva?s menus, recipes and shopping lists at www.savingdinner.com
How to Combat Rising Food Prices
By Mark P Cussen, CFP, CMFC, reprinted with permission
sophiewomansmagazine.com / Aug 2010 / pg 31
March of Dimes Fourth Annual
Signature Chefs Auction
Thursday, November 4, 2010 Rock Barn Golf & Spa 6:00 p.m. - 9:00 p.m.
As my grandmother used to say, “If only we didn’t have to eat...” Fortunately, there are many easy ways that you can lower your food bill without having to live on bread and lettuce. Here are some steps to keeping your grocery bill from eating you alive. 1. Buy staples in bulk at discount stores like Sam’s or Costco. This not only saves you money on the actual purchase, but it reduces the number of trips that you have to make to the store, where you can see other items that catch your eye. 2. Clip coupons and keep an eye peeled for sales at the store. Although this seems like a no-brainer solution, it is incredible how many people don’t bother to check the coupons they get in their Sunday paper before they go shopping. A few decent coupons can easily save you $10 to $20 per trip. 3. Pay in cash if at all possible, unless you are disciplined enough to pay off your credit card at the end of every month. Don’t pay unsecured interest rates on your food purchases. Also look at the items placed on the lower shelves in the grocery store, where the lower-priced items are usually stocked. 4. Ask your butcher or grocer when meat or other items that are nearing expiration get marked down. You might be able to haggle a deal with them for bulk purchases that you intend to consume immediately, which might otherwise go to waste. 5. Hit the local farmers market or produce fair to snap up some fresh produce that is grown locally. These vendors won’t charge you for the cost of transporting produce over long distances like grocery stores will. 6. Buy a water filter instead of bottled water. This is cheaper over the long run, and doesn’t use dozens of plastic bottles, which is easier on the environment.
M A R C H O F D I M E S
The Signature Chefs Auction is a gourmet extravaganza & auction, which pays tribute to some of the finest chefs and restaurants in the Foothills Area. In addition, live and silent auctions will offer a variety of items, including travel, entertainment, home improvement and dining packages. The mission of March of Dimes is to improve the health of babies by preventing birth defects, premature birth and infant mortality. We are working toward the day all babies are born healthy.
Sponsored by
Ticket price is $100 per person or $150 per couple. Corporate tables and sponsorship opportunities are available For more information or to RSVP: (828) 464-8905 or efranklin@marchofdimes.com.
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“Life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away.” how this works
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Each month our readers are going to submit photos to us via our web site or email. During that month, visitors to our web site at shutterbuggerz.com will vote on their favorite photo(s). Each month, the winning photographer (professional and amateur) will receive a prize.
Prizes:
Professional photographers will receive a free 1/4 page ad space in the next issue of Sophie Woman’s Magazine. The amateur winner will receive a $25 Gift Certificate to a local restaurant of their choosing. Promotional apparel provided by:
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Please read the submission guidelines and disclaimers on our web site at shutterbuggerz.com.
Photos Submitted By: 1. TKL Photography 2. Ravi Natarajan 3. Jill Frye 4. Tabi Sigmon 5. Penny Kale 6. Rachel Lee Carter 7. Richard Hovis 8. Dorinda Orders 9. Crystal Kirby
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We are now taking applications for vendors. For more information call 828-466-0122 or send an email to bride@sophiewomansmagazine.com
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sophiewomansmagazine.com / Sep 2010 / pg 39
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sophiewomansmagazine.com / Sep 2010 / pg 43
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sophiewomansmagazine.com / Aug 2010 / pg 47
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pg 48/ Sep 2010 / Sophie Woman’s Magazine
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~Business Write-up, Bookkeeping and Payroll Services. ~Business & Personal Financial and Estate Planning. ~Tax Preparation and Consulting for Businesses & Individuals. ~Quickbooks Certified and Pro Advisor.
Body Rejuvenation (cnt’d)
SkinLogix 828-291-2213 skinlogixofhickory.com
Pure Reflections 828-345-1290 purereflection.com
Cleaning Services
Sherry’s Sew ‘n Sew
Alterations & Custom Clothing
From wedding gowns, formal wear, prom, and pageants, to baby rompers, doggie coats, or a Batman costume for a horse, I can sew it! charmedmarketing@bellsouth.net Sherry Sigmon 828-302-2107 22 First East St. Newton, NC 28658
Art / Art Lessons
Palette Creations “Painting Your World” Come Join The Fun!
828-495-5111 email:mscheek@charter.net www.palettecreationsbymichael.com
Terry Moore Ford 828-464-3431 terrymooreford.com
Automotive
CROSSROADS “The Undisputed Price Leader!”
Classes For: Landscapes Seascapes Floral Still Life
“Call Me, I’ll Save You Money” Eddie Thomas
Sales Consultant (828) 460-1730 eddie.thomas@crossroadscars.com
1001 Jamestown Rd, Morganton NC - crossroadscars.com
Body Rejuvenation
Advanced Vein Center 828-322-8485 Graystone Place, Hickory
Hickory Plastic Surgery 828-322-8380 hickoryplasticsurgery.com
Horizon Surgical Specialist 828-758-5501 Lenoir, NC Physicians Plan Weight Loss 828-485-2833 physiciansplan.com
Bonded & Trustworthy • Residential • Commercial • Churches • References Available
828-443-4550
CLEANING SERVICES
Chiropractic
Sheppard Chiropratic 324-4600 becomehealthier.com
Cosmetics
609 US Hwy 70 W / Hildebran, NC 28637 /(828) 397-5471 / mwscpapc@earthlink.net
Alterations / Sewing
Kathy Watson
KATHY’S
Independent Beauticontrol Consultant 828-459-2424 www.beautipage.com/nancy101 Dr. Amy Brooks 828-438-1010 drbrooksnc.com Dr. John Fish (828) 397-5514 johnfishdds.com
Dental Care
Dr. Garlitz 828-322-1535 garlitzorthodontics.com
Event Centers / Family Fun
Statesville Civic Center (704) 878-3493 ci.statesville.nc.us CoPak Solutions 828-261-0255 copaksolutionsinc.com Foothills Cymnastics 828-328-3794 foothillsgym.com
The Peacock Inn 828-464-5780 thepeacockinn-newton.com
Food/Groceries
Fitness / Gyms
The Perfect Workout 828-465-4055 theperfectworkout.net
Highland Recreation Dept. 828-326-5000 hickorygov.com
YMCA 828-464-6130 ymcacv.org
Catawba Furniture Mall 1-866-702-7361 catawbafurniture.com Hickory Tree Consignments 828-324-1655 hickorytreeconsignment.com
Midway Carpet 828-465-1033 midwaycarpetdist.com Shoppes On Falls 828-313-2119 Granite Falls
Furniture / Home Decor
sophiewomansmagazine.com / Sep 2010 / pg 49
Gifts / Gift Baskets
Medical / Health Care (cnt’d) Healthy Living Solutions Maria Goldstein, CNC
Jillybean’s Creations Custom Made Gift Baskets Home-made Cakes, Brownies, Candy, and Cookies Hand Crafted Greeting Cards and Gift Tags Also, Home-made Jams & Jellies
828-729-2078
www.jillybeanscreations.com
Hair Accessories
Chic Wigs 828-324-5375 chic-wigs.com
Hair Care / Hair Salons (cnt’d)
Kat Escoto / Forte Salon 828-409-6009
image
Wild Birds Unlimited 828-441-2473 hickory.wbu.com
Humana / Phyllis Bruenger 828-396-7909 humana.com
Jewelry
Brand Jewelry 828-478-4800 Mooresville NC
(828) 381-1974 donnamlane@charter.net
2 Pink Magnolias 828-466-1976 2pinkmagnolias.com Gigi’s Consignment Boutique 704-732-0085 / 828-464-0888 Downtown Newton Style Exchange 828-267-7200 styleexchangeofhickory.com
Dana’s Dana’s Fine Jewelry
Ear Piercing • Custom Jewelry Design • Jewelry & Watch Repair • Custom Engraving (on anything)
facebook.com/danasfinejewelry
Real Estate Broker, Realtor
www.imagestudiossalon.com
The Bisanar Company 828-322-5090 bisanar.com
828-466-1999
Photography
3356 Hwy 70 SE Newton, NC 828.465.4943
State Farm Newton 828-466-3888 Hickory 828-324-9333
Buy An Engagement Ring From Dana’s & Get A Free 3-Day Get Away (July - Sept)
Wendy W. Perry
828-514-5163 or wendywperry@yahoo.com Preview Entire Collection At mysilpada.com/wendy.perry
Medical / Health Care
A Woman’s View 828-345-0800 awomansview.com Barbara’s Hearing 828-322-4750 barbarashearing.com Catawba Valley Medical Cent. 828-326-3000 catawbavalleymedical.org
Compounding Pharmacy 828-324-4115 thecompoundingrx.com Frye Medical Center 828-315-3391 fryemedctr.com Medicap Pharmacy 828-466-1500 medicap.com
Retail
Tracy’s On The Square 828-322-6651 Downtown Hickory Union Square Emporium 324-SHOP usehickory.com Warehouse 2120 828-855-0407 warehouse2120.com
POKKA DOTS FAMILY CONSIGNMENT
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Mon - Fri: 9:00 - 5:30 Sat: 10:00 - 3:00
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In Harmony With Nature
Donna M. Lane
Esthetics Skin Care Services, Bamboo Massage Therapy & Airbrush Tanning
Insurance
Mgoldstein-healthy@embarqmail.com
Pets / Animal Care
Shutterbuggerz 828-466-0122 shutterbuggerz.com
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Downtown Newton
Healthy Nutrition ~ Healthy Weight ~ Healthy Children ~ Healthy Beauty ~ Healthy Home
Sales Rep. & Trainer 828-328-1829/866-637-8870
Josh’s On The Square 828-324-JOSH joshsonunionsquare.com
(828) 267-0200
1510 16th St. NE Hickory, NC Sandy Ridge Rd
Restaurants
Retirement Living
Kingston Residence 828-327-9955 kingstonhealthcare.com
Scrapbooking
Pam Starnes (828) 327-4090
www.mycmsite.com/pamstarnes
Customized Scapbooks For: *Weddings *Anniversaries *Senior Year/Athlete *Celebrations of all kinds *Memorials for loved ones
EXPECTING? WE DELIVER. For five generations, Frye Regional Medical Center has welcomed Hickory’s tiniest new residents. With prenatal education, family centered birthing services, neonatal intensive care, and lactation counselors, moms-to-be have trusted Frye to deliver the birthing experience they expected. Choose a premier birthing experience. Schedule your personal tour of the Women’s Pavilion at Frye by calling 828-315-3391.
Kate Kincaid—Wife, Mother, Life and Wellness Coach-Patient of Dr. Robert Goins Joel Kincaid—Husband, Father, Insurance Agent Baby Evelyn—Born February 22, 2010 (of Lenoir, NC)
EXCEPTIONAL CARE, A CENTURY STRONG.
Alice Bishopric, M.D.
Robert Goins, M.D.
Maternity Services
Brandon Locklear, M.D.
Steve Merta, M.D.
Ryan Richardson, M.D.
Meredith Watson, M.D.
For information on our Spirit of Women New Mom Moments programs, please call 877-31WOMEN.
The Worse Advice Most Commonly Given to Business Owners
You have probably heard, been told or maybe even said to other business owners that you need to run your business to reduce your tax burden. This means to show as little profit and even a loss in order to pay as little taxes as possible. This is very bad advice and hurts your business. I understand not wanting to pay more than you should in taxes. I too don’t like the way the government has misused our hard earned money. However, my desire for less and more fair taxes is expressed in my voting for candidates who will lower taxes and reward business growth. It is important to not hurt the financial standing of your business by your desire to pay less in taxes. Let me explain what this means. There are three distinct events in the life of a business where a strategy of running your business to pay little or no taxes will hurt you. The first problem this strategy creates is one of focus. Reduction controls the owner’s actions, not growth. In fact, this viewpoint prohibits growth because a person can’t be thinking of two opposite actions at the same time. A concentration on lowering taxes causes an owner to look at every opportunity and think how to reduce the taxes associated with the action rather than how is this going to grow my business. This creates conflict within the leader and will always result in less than optimal execution of the plan. The result is that the company never grows to its full potential. Another instance in a business’ life cycle when a strategy of making minimal profits causes problems is when a business needs to borrow money. This can take place at a time of growth or in a time of slower economic times, like today. When a business owner goes to the bank to request funds, the bank looks at the company’s financial statements for proof of the repayment. If a business owner has been reducing his income to the point of no profits or a loss, it is extremely difficult for a bank to make a loan. I have heard business owners say, “But I run my car and cell phone through the business, I pay my wife and kids and have many other “expenses” that go through my business.” These are all legal and legitimate costs that are allowed to be run through a business by the owner. However, a bank has to see the ability to make payments. It is not responsible for the bank to think that you are going to stop paying your wife and kids, cell phones and car, to pay their loan. So it is much better to run your business to show a modest profit. Find out the average for your industry and make it your target. This average can be found by doing a Google search for the financial metrics for your type of business. The third and possibly most important time that a low tax strategy can hurt your business is when you sell your business. Every business owner will come to a time to exit their business. This is done either through transferring to a family member, friend, co-worker or selling. The financial statements of the business determine the value. The buyer will review the statements and based on the cash flow and profitability of the company make an offer. If the business shows little or no profit, then the value will be less than the owner wishes. A business broker will add back what are called “owner’s discretionary benefits.” These are items similar to the ones above in the paragraph – spouse’s salary, cars, cell phones, etc. However, each of these items then becomes a point of debate. If I were buying the business I might argue that you can’t add back the cell phones and car because I will need those when I run the business. The buyer will request a loan to purchase the business and will present the financial statements to his bank. They may also not be willing to add back all of the discretionary items. This could result in the prospect not getting the amount needed to purchase the business. Once again, it is much better to show a profitability that is at least equal if not better than the industry average. This will provide the buyer and the bank no reason to question the asking price and make the sale of your business much easier. I hope I have been able to show you why one of the most commonly heard pieces of advice given to business owners is not in your best interest. Deal with taxes at the ballot box. Run your business to make as much money as possible for yourself, your family, your employees and the future success of your business.
Jody Williams Business Strategy Specialist Synergy Coaching and Consulting
sophiewomansmagazine.com / Sep 2010 / pg 51
What Silpada means to me......
I was introduced to Silpada in 2007 and fell in love with Silpada’s hand-crafted sterling silver jewelry instantly! At the time, I was living in Morganton, NC and was exploring part-time opportunities that would allow me to stay at Wendy Perry home with my 2 kids, but would give me something fun to do several times a week that I could call “my own”! I knew the opportunity would allow me to have a flexible schedule, and I thought the profit from jewelry sales was pretty awesome! My husband and I were confident that I could pay back my initial investment with four Home Shows! That is where it all started, and it has only gone forward since then! A few of my closest friends & family wanted to support me in my new adventure and volunteered to host my very first Home Shows. Although I did not want to sell directly to my close circle of friends, they were fabulous in helping me get started. Since then, I have never looked back. Women at my shows absolutely love the relaxed nature of Silpada’s Home Show, and that it’s simply a “Fun Ladies Night Out” with no formal presentation. Hostesses can invite their friends, family and co-workers to their home or office in a comfortable setting with no sales presentation, and it is an opportunity to try on unique hand-crafted jewelry with friends! Based on Silpada’s average home show of $950 in retail sales, my typical hostess earns $285.00 in free jewelry! I am thrilled to tell my hostess that she has just earned all of this fabulous jewelry for opening her home or office for a few hours to host a show! My family now resides in Granite Falls, NC. I have been a rep with Silpada for 3 fabulous years and I still love the flexibility that Silpada affords my family. The earnings potential is astounding, and I have the best of both worlds -- I have a fabulous career with unlimited income potential and I am in control of my schedule so that I am able to be a great Mom and wife! Silpada has given me: 1) the opportunity to build friendships with self-motivated and positive women 2) the opportunity to “shine” through various leadership and personal sales awards; and 3) the ability to earn a fabulous income and FREE jewelry! If you would like to learn more about the business, hosting a party or to simply checkout the jewelry visit my website at www.mysilpada.com/ wendy.perry or you can shoot me an email at wendywperry@yahoo.com. Book a Silpada Party in 2010 and tell me you saw me in SOPHIE... I’ll give you a $25 Silpada Gift Certificate!!!
Want Free Jewelry or Extra Income? Contact Independent Silpada Jewelry Rep
Wendy W. Perry
828-514-5163 or wendywperry@yahoo.com Preview entire collection at www.mysilpada.com/wendy.perry
pg 52/ Sep 2010 / Sophie Woman’s Magazine
Be The Candle:
A 100-year-old woman on how to make the rest of your life count. BY: Naomi Drew “There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it.”--Edith Wharton “My advice to this generation is -- give of yourself. There’s no one who can’t give something.”--Mathilda Spak
“There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it.”-Edith Wharton
Of all the people I have ever interviewed, Mathilda Spak has to be one of the most extraordinary. At close to 100 years old, Mathilda is out there volunteering every day from morning till night. This feisty lady has more energy than people half her age even though she has severe arthritis and suffers from black-outs. Yet Mathilda completely relishes life. As she told me, “I’m having a ball!” Every day Mathilda either takes a bus or gets a ride to one of her many pet projects. Pay attention to the following words of wisdom from this rare gem of a woman. People like her don’t come along very often: “I made a promise to my mother that I would work on myasthenia gravis, the fatal debilitating illness she died from, till I found out what caused it and how to cure it. I have been asking questions ever since. Twenty-five years ago I started a research project and we are getting closer to finding out the causes. We have been able to cut the death rate from 85% to 5%. “I also work at the Children’s Hospital in Long Beach, California.
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sophiewomansmagazine.com / Sep 2010 / pg 53 When babies who have been abused are brought to the clinic, their soiled clothes are thrown out and they end up being released wrapped in a towel. Can you imagine? When I saw that, I lost my temper. I told the people at the hospital, These children need decent clothes! So they put me in charge. I convinced a yarn company to donate skeins of yarn. Now I have members of different churches knitting beautiful blankets and sweaters for the babies. I also get donations of new clothing. Now every single baby goes home properly clothed, with a pretty new blanket. “I also fund-raise for the City of Hope. Each year we have a Grand Prix fundraiser for 20 different charitable organizations. Hundreds apply to be included but the rule is that each organization can only participate every three years. A few years ago I made a deal with them to keep myasthenia gravis on their schedule every year. How did I convince them? I told them that I am in my nineties and I can’t afford to wait around three years between cycles.” “I try to fit it all in. What I can’t do at the office I take home. You have to stay busy, otherwise you get stagnant and you start to feel sorry for yourself. I also serve as a guide for the Long Beach Symphony, helping out when the children visit from schools.” “I got started on this path because my mother taught me from the time I was a child that you must always give back to the community in service. We had a little store in a poor neighborhood and my mother was always helping people. I learned it from her.” “There is a lot of goodness in people waiting to come out. One day I was on my way to work. I got off the bus and blacked out. Our office is in a very poor area of the city. Two down-and-out men came over and helped me. They could have stolen my purse and run away, but they didn’t. I looked at them and said, Are you hungry? And they said yes. So I asked them to come with me to the diner across the street and eat. But the men said, They won’t let us in. And I said, Oh yes they will!! Watch! We went inside together and I would not take any guff from the waitress about serving them. We had a nice breakfast, then I gave the waitress a $20 bill and told her that she had to feed these men till the money ran out, and I would be back to check. The men ate all week long.
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“I live every minute of my life as if it is the last, and I enjoy every second. I have two rules: At my funeral, anyone who sheds a tear will be haunted because I have lived a great life. The other rule is to continue my charity work.” “My advice to this generation is give of yourself. There’s no one who cannot give something. You can take care of a child, volunteer, help your neighbor. No excuses. My mother taught me you never say can’t, and that’s how I live. I have to walk with a cane. Big deal. So I buy myself fancy canes.” “Only by giving do you get back. My mother also taught me to only use the dollar for what good you can do with it, and to never turn away a hungry person.” “I get people to do all kinds of things. I go to the nursing home and have the older women knit for the babies. If someone says they can’t help out, I ask for one Wednesday. But people started saying, don’t let Mathilda ask you for one Wednesday or you’ll be doing one Wednesday for the rest of your life! I have one man who has been doing one Wednesday for 40 years.” May Mathilda’s story spark in you and your children a desire to get out there and make a difference. If you already are, please encourage people you know to join in. More than ever, the world needs all of us to care about each other and demonstrate our care through our actions. Small deed or large, what most matters is opening your heart and making a difference in any way you can.
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W FAMILY FEATURES
hether you’re sitting down to a macaroni and cheese dinner or a three-course meal, the simple act of eating dinner with your kids has a powerful impact on the whole family. Almost two decades of research by The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse (CASA) at Columbia University has consistently found that the more often kids eat dinner with their families, the less likely they are to smoke, drink or use drugs. Studies show that kids who have family dinner five times a week are: � 45 percent less likely to drink and 66 percent less likely to do drugs. � More likely to get A’s and B’s in school. � More likely to think their parents are proud of them. “The power of the family dinner comes not from the food on the plate but from who’s at the table and what’s happening there. The emotional and social benefits that come from family dinners are priceless,” said Kathleen Ferrigno, CASA’s Director of Marketing and head of CASA Family Day — A Day to Eat Dinner with your Children. “Having dinner as a family is one of the easiest ways to create routine opportunities for parental engagement and communication, two keys to raising drug-free children.” Even with busy schedules, it’s easier than you think to have a regular family meal. Here are some tips from CASA and Stouffer’s: � Plan meals together. � Make a date — schedule it on the calendar. � Cook together. � Unplug during dinner and talk. Save time making dinner with family-friendly entrées such as Stouffer’s Easy Express Cheesy Garlic Lasagna. This dish of freshly made pasta layered between mozzarella cheese, seasoned beef and a rich garlic tomato sauce is ready in only 18 minutes. While it’s cooking, make a Creamy Parmesan Romaine salad and a simple Fruit Salad for a delicious dinner the whole family will enjoy. Remember, dinner makes a difference, so be sure to take your seat at the dinner table often. For more tips on raising drug-free kids and creative ideas for family dinners, visit these websites: www.letsfixdinner.com and www.casafamilyday.org.
Conversation Starters
Looking for a way to engage in conversations with your kids? Use these conversation starters for a fun way to get everyone talking. � Where would you go for a dream vacation? � If you could have any superpower, what would it be? � What is one thing you could absolutely not live without? � If you could live in any time period, which one would it be? � What is your favorite thing you learned today? � What is one thing you want to accomplish in your lifetime? � What book are you reading right now? What do you like about it? What do you dislike about it?
A Dinnertime Story
“Let’s Fix Dinner,” a new book by award-winning author and illustrator Todd Parr, will make you giggle, grin, and think about all the ways dinner can bring families closer together. And since regular dinners and reliable housing are two of the best ways to help families — and especially kids — succeed, 100 percent of the net proceeds from sales of “Let’s Fix Dinner” will support Habitat for Humanity. Order your copy of this limited edition book at www.letsfixdinner.com.
Take the Challenge
Take the Let’s Fix Dinner Challenge and take it easy with time-saving and moneysaving prizes. From now until December 31, 2010, all you need to do is log in at www.letsfixdinner.com and track your family dinners each week, and you’ll get another chance to win.
Creamy Parmesan Romaine
Preparation Time: 10 minutes Cooking Time: 12 minutes Cooling Time: 10 minutes Servings: 4 2 slices whole-wheat bread (about 2 ounces total), cut into 1/2-inch cubes 8 cups chopped romaine lettuce 1 cup sliced cucumber 1/2 cup thinly sliced red onion 3 tablespoons Original Nestlé Coffee-Mate Liquid Coffee Creamer 2 tablespoons fat free sour cream 1 1/2 tablespoons light mayonnaise 2 tablespoons Buitoni Refrigerated Freshly Shredded Parmesan Cheese 1 1/2 to 2 teaspoons cider vinegar 1/2 teaspoon salt 1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper PREHEAT oven to 350°F. PLACE bread cubes in single layer on large baking sheet. Bake for 12 minutes or until lightly golden. Remove from oven; cool completely. PLACE lettuce, cucumber and onion in large bowl; set aside. COMBINE Coffee-mate, sour cream, mayonnaise, cheese, vinegar, salt and pepper in small bowl; stir until completely blended. Add to lettuce mixture; toss gently, yet thoroughly, to coat completely. Add bread cubes; toss gently.
Fresh Fruit Salad
Preparation Time: 20 minutes Cooling Time: 10 minutes Servings: 6 6 cups assorted fresh fruit (berries, grapes, sliced mango, strawberries and/or kiwifruit) Juice from 1 lime 3 tablespoons Tropical Flavor Nestlé Juicy Juice All Natural 100% Juice 2 teaspoons finely chopped mint leaves COMBINE fruit in large bowl. Add lime juice, Juicy Juice and mint; toss gently to coat. Refrigerate until ready to serve.
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