Kallah Magazine Pesach 2010

KallahMagazine Volume 5.3 Pesach 2010 5770

YOUR MUST-READ FROM SHIDDUCHIM THROUGH SHANA RISHONA

• Inspiration • Insight • Information • Ideas • Shopping

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From the publisher: Thanks to my support staff, namely my husband, for showing me the way to bring you this special issue of Kallah Magazine. Though the print issues have been put on the site in PDF format for the past several years, this online issue is different from all the others. (Very appropriate for Pesach, isn’t it?) The links embedded in the text and in some of the ads are active. That means, for example, that you can click on the site on the ad for the SHALOM Workshop and be taken right to their site from here. Likewise, when you see links in the articles that offer more information or more photos, as for the places described in the Chol Hamoed Outings article, a click will take you there.

You may notice that this online issue is a bit shorter than the print magazines have been. It actually turned out longer than I had originally planned for a more Pesach centered than general spring issue. I was originally going to give Ms. Maven a break from writing and only include recipes, outing ideas, and a dvar Torah by Rabbi Brown that combines the themes of Pesach and marriage But the issue grew with more features. The “Cosmetic Components” article explains what may be problematic and what you don’t have to worry about. It offers a number of links for further reading on the subject. Ms. Maven’s advice in response to a mistake applies at any time of year. You don’t want to make a mistake when buying a sheitel . For kallahs or anyone contemplating that purchase, Aviva Rizel’s “Sheitels 101” is a must-read.

The gmach listings that are usually included in the print issues are not included in this one. That is because once you have this issue open, you can just click over to the Directory page. This page has the most updated and complete gmach listings for New York and New Jersey. Just scroll down the page at http://kallahmagazine.com/serv04.htm Two other particularly helpful pages are relatively new. The http://kallahmagazine.com/JewishWedding.html page offers articles on the meaning behind the rituals of the Jewish wedding. For the practical issues of the wedding, see the articles and index at http:// kallahmagazine.com/WeddingAdvice.html You’ll find other links of interest at http://kallahmagazine.com/index.htm Please let the advertisers know that you saw their ad in this special issue. This could not be free for you without them.

Wishing everyone a chag kasher vesameach, Ariella Brown Kallah Magazine is published by Write Way Productions at 52 Columbia Avenue, Cedarhurst, NY 11516 For more information, email editor@kallahmagazine.com or call 516-791-3904 during business hours.

©2010 Kallah Magazine and Write Way Productions. All rights reserved.

Kallah Magazine reserves the right to print and edit submissions, including stories, articles, and letters in part or in full unless specifically requested otherwise. No articles, photographs, artwork, or other material in this publication -– both in print and web form – may be reproduced in any manner without explicit permission of the publisher. Kallah Magazine is not responsible for typographical errors or accuracy of advertisers’ claims.

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Vol.5 no. 3 Pesach 2010 /5770

Table of Contents Torah Insight

Find more online!

Split the Difference

by Rabbi Chaim Brown

Special Features Chol Hamoed Outing Ideas Cosmetic Components: Halachic Perspective

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6 14

Advice Ms. Maven Responds

How to Erase Your Mistakes Sheitels 101

by Aviva Rizel

Features Letter from the Publisher Kallah in the Kitchen There’s No Place Like Home for Pesach

10 23 1 17

Visit Kallahmagazine.com for great web features

*Advice: *Archived Articles *The Kallah Magazine Blog *Divrei Torah *Homefront with cooking tips & recipes by Levana Kirschenbaum *Kallah 101 *Money Matters *PDFs of earlier issues *Reflections: Beauty & Sheitel Tips *Sample chapters from upcoming book *Shopping Resources in 3 categories: -Directory - updated gmach info -Jewelers -LookingGoodW

*New Index Pages* Aspects of the Jewish Wedding Wedding Planning Advice Stay in the loop with updates on Twitter and Facebook. Click the links on www.KallahMagazine.com, Kallahmagazine.blogspot.com, or http://www.examiner.com/x-18522NY-Jewish-Bridal-Examiner to start following!

Send in your stories, your insights, your comments, and suggestions to: editor@Kallahmagazine.com

Kallah Magazine Special Pesach Edition 2010 / 5770

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Split the Difference

by Rabbi Chaim Brown

The difficulty of finding a shidduch is succinctly captured

by Chazal’s statement (Sanhedrin 22) that, “Kasheh l’zavgam k’keriyas Yam Suf,” the pairing of a couple for marriage is as difficult as the splitting of Yam Suf. While it is comforting to know that Hashem kavyachol [so to speak] shares our difficulties, the analogy used by Chazal begs for explanation. Marriage is an achievement of an ideal, the discovery of one’s soulmate, the “bashert,” which one was destined to be with from the moment of one’s conception; on the other hand, the splitting of the sea is the undoing of the ideal course of nature for a temporary duration and need. Marriage is a bond that we hope lasts a lifetime; the miracle of the splitting of the sea is a temporary disruption.

Chazal, masters of language and nuance, have presented us seemingly with an oxymoron.

The Gemara (Menachos 29) tells us that Hashem used the letter “hey” to create this world, and the letter “yud” to create the next world. While we may not understand how letters can be used to create worlds, it is clear that together the two letters spell G-d’s name “K-ah,” telling us that each world alone is inadequate to represent the presence of G-d , which requires both worlds in unison.

The goal of the Torah is not ascetic withdrawal from the material world, but the use of the world for the purposes

of the Torah. What differentiates man from angel is that an angel is trapped in a static world of holiness; man has been given the unique ability to take the gross physicality of the world we are in and make it holy (Derech Hashem I:4:4).

The sifrei chassidus [books of Hassidic thought] go so far as to tell us that the world serves not just an instrumental good, but that within each physical object there are sparks of G-dliness and the use of the world for Torah and mitzvos reveals what is beyond our daily sensory experience, namely, that every physical object is a mask for G-d’s presence that can be revealed when that object is used for good (Tzava’as haRivash #109; Tanya, Sha’ar HaYichud v’HaEmunah, ch.

6; Mavo HaShea’arim, ch. 3 & 4). As long as we see the “yud” of the next world as a separate realm from the “hey” of this world, then we are missing the full picture. The “yud” of next-worldy G-dliness is inherent in this world, if we seize the opportunity to use it properly.

The instinctive human response to crisis and tragedy, even for those who are not observant of Torah and mitzvos, is prayer. The Jewish people stood on the banks of Yam Suf, some staring forward at the raging waters, some staring backwards at the pursuing Egyptians, with no hope in sight.

They begin to cry out, and Moshe Rabeinu himself begins to plead with Hashem to intercede yet again and save us.

Abruptly, Moshe is cut short. Hashem declares: “Mah

Kallah Magazine Special Pesach Edition 2010 / 5770

titzak alei, debeir el Bnei Yisrael v’yisau“ [Why scream to me? Tell the Jewish people to travel forward]. No end of commentary has been offered to try to explain why here, when the natural inclination is to turn to prayer, when the only other option is to rely on a miracle that has not been promised our guaranteed, Hashem was not interested in our prayers and orders Moshe to simply march forward.

Tefila [prayer] is an attempt to bridge the gap between the reality that we perceive and what we believe Hashem’s goodness should allow. It is an attempt to bridge the chasm between the “hey” of this world, with all its defects, and the “yud,” the next world of ultimate goodness and holiness.

The Telzer Rosh Yeshiva, R’ Yosef Bloch, explains the point beautifully.

Tefila [prayer] is an attempt to bridge the gap between the reality that we perceive and what we believe Hashem’s goodness should allow. It is an attempt to bridge the chasm between the “hey” of this world, with all its defects, and the “yud,” the next world of ultimate goodness and holiness that lies just out of reach. This almost universal feeling is what Moshe was told he must transcend. To explain Hashem’s response, the Midrash offers an analogy of the best friend of a king who begins to plead for a favor; the king replies that no begging is needed, the friend simply has to command and the king will see that the wishes are fulfilled. Moshe’s prayers were out of place; the king stood ready to fulfill his command, and all that remained was action. For a Moshe Rabeinu the world of “hey” and “yud” are not two separate worlds divided, but are one and the same.

Seeing a physical river as an obstacle to kedusha [holiness] until somehow G-d chooses to impose his will and change that reality through our prayers is seeing two separate worlds with a gulf between them. Seeing a river as inherently an

expression of G-d’s will which exists only to serve Him and enable the Jewish people to do so is to see the “yud” even within our reality. Such a river does not need a miracle to bend to G-d’s will. All that is required is that we to walk through it. The song Bnei Yisrael sang when the Yam split is “Azi v’zimras K-ah” [G-d is my strength and my praise].

The “hey” and “yud” were experienced as one, spelling Kah, because they realized only then there is no gulf between G-d and the world, between the Jewish people and G-d, and between the laws of nature and the reality of G-d’s presence.

Chazal chose to compare marriage to keriyas Yam Suf with great care and deliberateness. The difference between the word ish, man, and the word isha, woman, is that one is spelled with a “yud” and one is spelled with a “hey”.

As long as the chasson and kallah see themselves as two separate elements, as a world of “yud” that lies across a gap from the world of “hey,” even if they build bridges across that gap and join in the bond of marriage, there is still something lacking.

The key to revealing Hashem’s presence, “Kah,” at Yam Suf was realizing that there is no gap to bridge between the world of “yud” and the world of “hey,” that the physical and spiritual worlds are cut from one and the same cloth.

Chazal teach through their analogy to Yam Suf that the key to a successful shidduch is not figuring out how to cross the divide that separates the “I” of chasson from the “I” of kallah, but to realize that the neshoma [soul] of the chosson and the neshoma of the kallah form a single entity. Ish and isha are not two separate parts, but are one united whole. With that perspective can they join together to reveal Hashem, “K-ah” in their world.

Rabbi Chaim Brown is a regular contributor to Kallah Magazine. You can find additional divrei Torah of his archived on the Divrei Torah page of www.Kallahmagazine. com and on his blog,. http://divreichaim.blogspot.com/

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Chol Hamoed Outing Ideas: Fantastic Fish, Marvelous Miniatures, and Breathtaking Blossoms Tired of the usual trips to the usual zoo, run-of-the-mill aquarium and the no-longer-thrilling amusement parks for Chol Hamoed? Do you find the standard crowd pleasers less than pleasing and more than crowded? Consider some of these Long Island attractions for a change of pace.

Atlantic Marine World Aquarium

Located at 431 East Main Street Riverhead, NY 1190, this museum is a bit of a drive out on the island. But once you get there, you will fin it worth the trip for the displays of brilliantly colored tropical fish, the sea lion show, the presentation of penguins, and the many photo opportunities outside. For more information about the exhibits and schedule of special events, call the general number at 631.208.9200. You can learn more online at www.atlantismarineworld.com.. Check for coupons to save on the price of admissions. You can see more photos at http://www.examiner.com/x-18522-NY-Jewish-BridalExaminer~y2010m2d2-Picture-perfect-scenes-on-LongIsland-Atlantis-Marine-World

Can you picture yourself as a pirate?

coral reef display Kallah Magazine Special Pesach Edition 2010 / 5770

Nassau County Museum of Art Nassau County Museum ofArt (NCMA) is located 20 miles east of New York City in Roslyn Harbor, Long Island. The museum site was originally a wedding gift. Henry Clay Frick gave “Clayton,” a Georgian mansion and two hundred acres of grounds to his son and daughter-in-law in 1919. Learn more about the history online at http://www.nassaumuseum.com/ index.html. The museum’s extensive grounds showcase its sculpture garden. But it is also worth seeing for the formal gardens originally designed by Marian Coffin. You can access the gallery of photos on the site to see various views of the fountain, shrubbery beds, and trellis.

and the miniature museum is $10 for adults. The phone number for general information is 516-484-9337.

interior view of the castle above, exterior below

whimsical sculpture on exhibit outdoors The museum’s art collection is small, though are some nice pieces that are well presented. Though you could see more examples of paintings and sculptures in the Metropolitan Museum of Art, this museum does have something unique in the second building, the Ridder Miniature Museum. The piece de resistance there is the miniature castle valued at over one milion dollars. The castle has its own site at http:// www.dollhousecastle.com. You can also view a slideshow of photos at http://www.examiner.com/x-18522-NY-JewishBridal-Examiner~y2010m1d25-Picture-perfect-scenes-onLong-Island. Combined admissin for both the art museum

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Planting Fields Arboretum State Historic Park Step into the grandeur of the Gilded Age at Planting Fields Arboretum State Historic Park, 1395 Planting Fields Road, Oyster Bay, NY 11771. This grand property features the mansion that was home to the family of the insurance mogul, William Robertson Coe. With its distinctive architecture and expressly planned landscaping, it is a prime example of the Gold Coast estates on Long Island’s North Shore.

The 409 acres surrounding the house include green houses with exquisite flowers, various outdoor gardens, decorative pools, specimen trees, and nature walks. The grounds are worth seeing in spring through fall, and the main greenhouse with its tropical plants, trees, and orchids, at any time. The camellias, though, are only bloom in winter from January through March.

photo taken in the camellia green house above; exterior shot of Coe Hall below

Kallah Magazine Special Pesach Edition 2010 / 5770

Gorgeous flowers abound, both in the outdoor gardens and in the greenhouse.

Even if you miss the camellias, you will have much to admire in the main greenhouse, as well as in the outdoor gardens that feature spring flowers and blossoming trees.

With plenty of idyllic spots to choose from, you can enjoy a picnic on the grounds.

You can enter the grounds and greenhouses for free, but most days you have to pay $6 for parking on all weekends and holidays and every day between Memorial Day and Labor Day. It is not charged on weekdays (that are not legal holidays) between September and May. Tours of the house are available April 1 - September 30. Guided tours last about one hour and cost $3.50. There are also “self-guided” tours for $3.50, but those are limited to the main floor. Children 12 and under get in free. I have done the tour here. I’ve been on better house tours with more informative guides, but it is worth seeing the inside of the house at least once. The tour ticket also covers admission to the Manor House. The number to call about Coe Hall is (516)922-8682.

For more information about exhibits and what is open when, visit the site, www.plantingfields.org or call (516) 922-9200.

See more stunning pictures at http://www.examiner.com/ x-18522-NY-Jewish-Bridal-Examiner~y2010m1d26Picture-perfect-scenes-on-Long-Island-Planting-FieldsArboretum-State-Historic-Park

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Ms. Maven Responds: How to Erase Your Mistakes Dear Ms. Maven, My cousin recently got engaged, and my aunt and uncle planned a vort [engagement party]. My grandmother was flying in for the occasion. As I live nearby and the hosts were busy with the preparations, they asked if I was willing to pick her up from the airport. I agreed. But it totally slipped my mind. The day of the vort, my aunt called to ask what happened. My grandmother had waited for over two hours until she hired a taxi to my aunt’s house. She was very upset because she thought something must have gone wrong, and she couldn’t reach anyone on the phone.

When I told my aunt that it doesn’t really matter because in the end, my grandmother got there safe and sound, she said that was no thanks to me.

I don’t get it. I just made a mistake; everyone makes mistakes. What’s the big deal? But now my aunt, uncle, and grandmother are rather cold to me. How can I get them to get over it so that this is all resolved before the wedding?

-Mistakes Happen Ms. Maven responds: Yes, mistakes do happen and so does forgiveness, but there is an essential step in between that you are missing. The key to making the second happen after the first is saying you’re sorry. It is not up to you to say that they should not make a big deal out of it. There were no consequences for you, so it is easy for you to say it. Though denying wrongdoing to absolve one’s self of guilt is practically a knee-jerk reaction, it doesn’t work. And if you try to follow the maxim of “A good offense is the best defense,” you will only succeed in offending people further than you already have. Taking the stance that others are to blame because they should not be upset about your mistake indicates a moral compass seriously out of alignment.

Your attempt to brush off your mistake as nothing shows that you don’t consider their feelings of consequence. It is the equivalent of accidentally bumping into someone and just moving on without saying “I’m sorry” or “Please excuse me.” The bump is the result of an accident, but neglecting to apologize to the person jostled indicates you don’t think them worthy of such attention, which is an act of contempt. When I saw an elderly gentleman forced to

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move back from someone rushing through a store, what bothered him more was the fact that the person didn’t even break stride to apologize for it. I have no doubt that if the person would have only expressed regret for bumping into the man, he would have been forgiven. It is the contempt implied by the neglect to do so that is more upsetting than the unintentional bump.

Unilaterally declaring your mistake inconsequential does not make it so.

Unilaterally declaring your mistake inconsequential does not make it so. When you declare, “It’s over,” you show that you are measuring by your own feelings alone and do not care about them. On the other hand, apologizing for the effect of your mistake can virtually erase it. Your apology shows that their feelings are important to you. If you have the ability to say, “I really messed you up there, and I’m sorry,” then the incident remains limited to the mistake alone, which can then be forgiven. Consequently, if you apologize, they are likely to respond, “It’s okay,” or “Don’t worry about it.” .

Acknowledge the truth -- that you were irresponsible and negligent. Then tell the people you let down that you are very sorry for it and wish to make it up to them in the future.

Apologize for making a mistake for which other people pay the price. Apologize for the anxiety your grandmother experienced while waiting and waiting with no one around to reassure her. Apologize to your aunt and uncle for letting them down when they were counting on you for taking care of this. Those words, so long as they are sincere, can work magic and make the bad feelings disappear.

Wise people make use of this magic in their family life and in business relationships. You will notice it in any company that trains its people in top notch customer service. Would you keep giving your business to a company that overcharges you or makes other mistakes that you have to spend time rectifying and then fails to apologize? Likely, you would start shopping around for an alternative that either is more competent or more courteous, preferably both. Likewise, if you want to keep on good terms with family members, it is essential to convey that you do not take their feelings for granted and do feel sorry when your mistakes cause them grief. Here, I’ve given you the key, but it’s up to you to use it.

Kallah Magazine Special Pesach Edition 2010 / 5770

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Cosmetic Components: Halachic Perspectives

Before Pesach, we spend a lot of time shopping for food and kitchen accessories. Should we be adding certified kosher lâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Pesach cosmetics to our list? The short answer is no. Though we do generally spring for a new lipstick, new toothpaste, and, of course, new toothbrushes, according to most views, you do not need to do a Pesach purge of your mascaras, eyeliners, eye shadows, blushes, etc.

for consumption, most cosmetics do not fall into this category.

Not all alcohol is grain-based. Isopropyl alcohol and methanol are not based on chametz, and cetyl alcohol is derived from coconut. Consequently, it is possible that a product listing alcohol among its ingredient poses no chametz problem. In fact, most cosmetics contain no problematic ingredients, as you can ascertain by reading their labels.

While we are stringent not to use perfumes and shaving lotions that are based on denatured alcohol, which is a grain-based alcohol that could, theoretically, be return to a state that is fit

While some products list the grains in their familiar versions of wheat or oat (which may be included under sodium stearoyl oat protein or colloidal oatmeal), some will opt for the Latin forms.

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Kallah Magazine Special Pesach Edition 2010 / 5770

So watch for Avena sativa (derived from oat kernels, beta glucan (a soluble fiber found in the cell walls of oat kernels), or triticum vulgare (wheat germ oil). Rye may be referred to as secale, and barley as hordeum. Other grains may be signified by the term gliadin. If you don’t see any of those terms on products that are required by law to list all their ingredients, they should be free of chametz altogether. According to all views, it is acceptable to use those, except for on Shabbos and Yom Tov. You do not have to have a kosher certification on your blush to be assured. You can check with your own posek about the view that even permits the use of cosmetics that do contain some of the ingredients listed above because they are classified as inedible.

4 O.C. 42:1; Shulchan Aruch ha-Rav 24; Igros Moshe O.C. 3:62.

5 Sefer Hilchos Pesach, pg. 26.

In “Medicines and Cosmetics for Pesach,” Rabbi Doniel Neustadt, makes it clear that the stringency we generally apply to prohibit the use of products containing “restorable denatured alcohol applies only to products which are in a pure liquid state.

Some possible examples include cologne, hair spray, deodorants and shaving lotion.” They do not apply to other cosmetics products, as he states unequivocally: “Items like creams, hand lotions and ointments do not present a problem. Certain other liquid products, such as shampoo(15), ink(16) and paint are also not restorable to their original alcoholic state and they may be stored and used This line of makeup contains oatmeal (chametz) tapioca and on Pesach even though they may contain chametz rice flour (kitniyos, which Ashkenazim eschew in food, though ingredients.” it is not restricted in the same way chametz use is plus

Excerpt from “The Kashrus, Shabbos and Pesach Guide to Cosmetics” by Rabbi Dovid Heber, Star-K Kashrus Administrator posted at http://www. star-k.org/kashrus/kkmitzvos-cosmetics.htm: According to halacha, if a makeup is unfit for human and canine consumption, it may be used on Pesach even if it contains chometz ingredients.

Nonetheless, many individuals are strict and avoid using creams, lotions and liquids that contain chometz.10 This is especially true for lipstick11 which one may inadvertently swallow.

barley (chametz), wheat germ (chametz), pomegranate, Goji See http://www.

Berry, Vitamins C and E . It sounds almost good enough to kashrut.com/Passover/ medications/ for the full eat, but is it considered so halachically? article which begins with the principle 11 Powdered products that cosmetics are not (e.g. powdered blush and categorized as products fit for consumption: foundation) and pencil containing chometz may be used even by “It is permitted, therefore, to store and use all types of ointments, those who are generally mehader since they are not ra’uy l’achila hand lotions, nail polish or medicated drops (for the ear or and there is no sicha k’shtiya when using these products. nose), etc., even if they contain an active chametz ingredient.

For further reading on the subject, you can see http://www.

These items are not fit for consumption and as the Rambam and koltorah.org/ravj/14-28_Cosmetics_and_Toiletries_for_ Shulchan Aruch write, ‘nifseda tzuras ha-chametz,’ they have Pesach_1.htm. Also see the PDF of the CRC reproduced on the lost their chametz “form”(4). Similarly, certain cosmetics (eye shadow, eye liner, mascara, blush and rouge) and foot and face following page. powders may be stored and used during Pesach(5).

Where:

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www.crcweb.org

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Kallah Magazine Special Pesach Edition 2010 / 5770

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Kallah in the Kitchen: There’s No Place Like Home for Pesach

by Ariella Brown Personally preparing for Pesach includes spiritual preparation, learning halachos and inspirational Torah., but physical preparations are also of value. In the past, I’ve blogged on the topic: lefoom tza’ara agra: your pick: . . . going to hotels for Pesach is on its way to becoming the standard practice. . . . Then there are those of us who try to watch the budget and limit our Pesach expenditures . . . Our tza’ara is not as much the money (though we notice that, too) as the shopping, shlepping, cleaning, and cooking. We need not envy those who only shop for a wardrobe befitting their hotels. Like the Tanaim who would personally prepare for Shabbos in some way (and my husband did more than his fair share of preparing the kitchen for Pesach) we can feel accomplished for our . . . personal exertions for the honor of the Yom Tov. So perhaps the hotel guests should really envy those of us who stay at home. Yes, they may have it easier. But that does not mean they have a better Yom Tov experience. Aside from the satisfaction of personally preparing for the Yom, Tove, there is another benefit to staying home

for Pesach: the food. Every Pesach hotel ad I’ve seen proclaims its menu to be non- gebrokts. That means that at every single meal will involve potatoes. They may be baked, boiled, fried, mashed, made into kugel or reduced to starch, but they are bound to be there in some form or other. From the soup accompaniment to the pastries served for desert, it is probable that every course will include some manifestation of potato based foods. It must get pretty wearying to roll from one meal to the next without much noticeable difference. After a while you may feel like a potato yourself.

your Pesach menu. It can be cooked and served like rice. Because it is of the chenopod family of plants (like beets and spinach) it is neither classified as a grain or as a legume, making it appropriate for Pesach consumption.

As I have a family tradition of enjoying gebrokts on Pesach, my Pesach menu includes not just matzah balls and matzah brei, but matzah kugel, matzah lasagna, and desserts made with matzah cake meal. I’ve included some of my favorite recipes for you to try this Pesach. I guarantee that they are all easy and delicious (unless you don’t follow the recipe correctly).

But before you stock up on matzah meal, I advise you to consult your significant other about expectations and family practice with respect to type of matzah used, as well as views on cotton seed oil, a key ingredient in Pesach margarine, mayonnaise and salad dressing. Once you clarify you’re your family practice is going to be, you can adapt Pesach recipes accordingly and built up your own repertoire of favorites. Here are some to get you started.

Gebrokts recipes. Note if you don’t have cake meal, you can make your own by putting your matzah meal through the food processor or blender to make it finer. You can also, of course, start with whole matzahs and grind them fine.)

Apple cake (a mezonos cake is good to have around for

If you opt to stay at home, on the other hand, the menu is completely in your own hands. You have access to far more ingredients than the hotel and so are not limited to the standardized fare of brisket and chicken with potato kugel followed by potato starch cake. Doing your own cooking and baking allows you to be in control of the cuisine. If you do eat gebrokts, you can base your cakes on the fine matzah meal called cake meal . Even if you don’t eat gebrokts, you can achieve better texture and flavor by using ground nuts in the batter than by using potato starch.

And for your side dishes, consider sweet potatoes or carrots or squash for more nutrition and variety than another serving white potatoes. Quinoa is something else you may want to introduce to

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Kiddush – non-gebrokts Pesach cakes and cookies are shehakol, which does not fulfill the obligation of eating after Kiddush) 1 c. sugar 1 c. cake meal 1/2 c .oil 3 egg yolks, beaten 2 tbsp. lemon juice 4 egg whites, beaten to stiff, glossy peaks 5 lg. apples, sliced 1/3 to 1/2 c. chopped nuts 2 tbsp. sugar 1 tsp. cinnamon Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Grease 8 inch square pan. Combine first 5 ingredients, stir until well blended. Fold in beaten egg whites; gently, but thoroughly. Pour 1/2 of batter into greased baking pan. Arrange sliced apples on top. Carefully spoon remaining batter over apple slices. Stir nuts, sugar and cinnamon together. Spoon on top of cake. Bake 40 to 50 minutes.

1 lb. jar apricot preserves ½ to ½ c. lemon juice ½ c. chopped nuts (may be omitted according to taste) Combine all dough ingredients. Spread ¾ of it in a 9 x 13 pan .

Bake 20 minutes at 325 degrees. Refrigerate remaining dough. Spread filling over crust while hot.

Put nuts on top, then crumble remaining dough to form a crumb topping. Bake again for 30 to 35 minutes. Cut into squares when cool.

Matazah Lasagna (Dairy) (I recommend that once you open the cottage cheese, you use the whole thing by doubling the recipe and preparing two tins.)

4 square matzahs 1 15 oz. jar tomato sauce 8 oz. cottage cheese 8 oz. shredded mozzarella cheese

Spread sauce on bottom of 8” square pan, to with one quarter of cottage cheese, sauce, shredded cheese.

Repeat until ingredients are finished. Top with last matzah, tomato sauce, Apricot squares (really, as good as anything and mozzarella cheese. Cover with foil and bake at 350 degrees for 50 minutes. chametz) Dough ingredients: ½ lb. softened margarine 2 egg yolks 2 c. cake meal (that’s extra finely ground matzah meal) 1 cup sugar pinch of salt 1 tsp. vanilla 2 tsp. grated lemon rind (you could skip this in pinch) Filling

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Kiglach (perfect for breakfast, tea, or as a satisfying snack) 4 c. matzah farfel salt and pepper to taste 3 c. boiling water 6 eggs beaten Combine farfel, salt, and pepper with boiling water.

After water is absorbed add beaten eggs. Spoon into greased muffin tins. Bake for ½ hour at 400 degrees.

Serve as muffins with jam or syrup.

Kallah Magazine Special Pesach Edition 2010 / 5770

Non-gebrokts recipes Roasted Peppers (tasty, easy, and completely guiltfree) Mini sweet peppers in assorted colors (that’s all you need) Lay the peppers out in a single layer in a shallow baking pan and broil until they are softened and just slightly charred. Serve warn as a great accompaniment to your main dish.

Easy Vegetable Kugel 1 ½ lbs. frozen broccoli or spinach, completely Matzah farfel and onion sauté (great side dish) defrosted (You can substitute sliced or chopped 2 lg onions, minced. zucchini that has been boiled for about 10 minutes ½ lb mushrooms, sliced (may be omitted if you have until it is softened) people 3 eggs, beaten who don’t like mushrooms) 3 T. mayonnaise ¼ c. margarine or oil 3 T. onion soup mix 3 ½ c. matzah farfel 1 can mushrooms (omit for those who don’t like ¼ tsp. pepper mushrooms) 1 tsp. salt 1 c. chicken soup Mix all the ingredients aside from the vegetables 1 c. water together and pour over vegetables. Pour into a greased Sauté onions and mushrooms in margarine or oil until 8” or 9” pan and bake at 350 degrees for one hour. soft. Add farfel and stir until lightly browned. Add seasonings then the liquid. Cook over low heat and Zucchini and tomatoes stir often until all liquid is absorbed.

2 large zucchinis, peeled and sliced (I slice them in a food processor) 1 onion, chopped 1 lb. tomatoes (beefsteak or plum work) chopped Oil

Zucchini kugel 3 medium zucchinis cut into chunks 2 extra large eggs ¼ cup matzo meal 1 tablespoon mayonnaise ½ packet dry onion soup mix Boil zucchini until soft, about 10-15 minutes. Mash it into a colander. Mix the other ingredients together and then add the mashed zucchini. Put it into a greased 8” or 9” pan and bake in a preheated 350 degree oven for 35-40 minutes.

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Kallah Magazine Special Pesach Edition 2010 / 5770

½ tsp. sugar Salt and pepper to taste Handful of fresh dill (optional) Sauté onion in oil until golden, about 5 minutes. Add tomatoes, sugar, salt , pepper, and dill and stir. Cover pot and cook over medium heat until tomatoes soften, about 7 minutes. Add zucchini and stir together, cook an additional 10-12 minutes until zucchini is done.

This is delicious with meat and chicken.

pale; about 1 minute. Blend in chocolate mixture and stir in almonds. Fold in beaten whites, 1/3 at a time, into chocolate. Place in greased 8” or 9” round pan.

Bake in preheated 350 degree oven for 45 minutes.

Cover the torte with foil for last 20 minutes of baking.

You can also put a baking with 1 inch of water on the bottom rack of the oven while baking to help keep the torte moist. Cool on wire rack for 10 minutes and then carefully remove sides of pan. Invert onto a serving plate and cool completely.

Parve Strawberry Ice Cream (you should have a stand mixer because it has to whip for up to 20 minutes. ) 1 egg white juice of ½ lemon 3/4 cup sugar ½ lb strawberries Beat egg white until foamy; continue beating as you slowly pour in the sugar. Wash the berries, and cut into quarters or slice. Add the berries and lemon juice to the egg white when it is in peaks. Keep the mixer going at a medium-high speed for an additional 15 minutes.

It will triple in volume. Store in freezer.

Chocolate Torte (I get requests for this even when we can have chametz cakes) 1/2 cup pareve margarine 8 ounces semisweet chocolate, (you could use chocolate chips or break up a bar) 5 eggs, separated 3/4 cup white sugar 1 cup ground almonds (it works with other types of nuts, as well) Find more recipes for Pesach or any time, Melt margarine and chocolate over low heat. Stir until courtesy of Levana Kirschenbaum at http:// smooth and let cool. In a medium-size mixing bowl, kallahmagazine.com/home%20front.htm beat whites until stiff; about 2 minutes. In a separate bowl, beat together yolks and sugar until thick and www.KallahMagazine.com 516-791-3904 21

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Kallah Magazine Special Pesach Edition 2010 / 5770

Sheitels 101

By Aviva Rizel

One of the most taxing decisions a kallah endures is choosing her first sheitel. All sheitel machers know that when servicing a kallah, we must be patient and informative.

Even with the most considerate sheitel macher, a kallah can leave her salon even more confused than when she walked in. This is due to the plethora of information surrounding a sheitel. It behooves all kallahs to do a little research before scheduling a sheitel appointment. I have put together below a crash-course in purchasing a sheitel. It is only the “lecture” part of the course. The supplementary “lab” is given at your local sheitel macher’s salon, where she will guide you in exploring sheitels hands-on. We’ll start with the basic components that distinguish sheitels .

The Cap

The cap of your wig will contribute to its comfort level. Some wigs have an open weft, which means that the rows of hair are held together by columns of elastic strips. The (minor) benefit of this that I personally have found is that you can reach through the the cap to scratch your head.

Aside from that minute benefit, most women find a stretch cap to be more comfortable. It is made of a lightweight, tightly-woven elastic mesh and conforms easily to the unique shape of each woman’s head. There is also a super-light weight stretch cap, sometimes known as “stocking stretch cap.” Customers who purchase wigs with this type of cap rave about the comfort of it. While it is exceptionally comfortable, it is also exceptionally delicate, calling for special care in washing. Most higher-end wigs are made with a stretch cap. Freeda Wigs, for example, updated their entire inventory from open weft to stretch. Some of the less expensive companies have a stretch cap in one or two of their models .

is in the cap of the wig by the part of the hair. The more economical type of skin top is simply a strip (sometimes wide, sometimes narrow, depending on the company) in the place where the part is. This means that if the skin-toned strip is on the left side, the wig should not be parted on the right side. While you can direct the hair that way, the part would reveal the netting rather than the skin tone.

Multi-directional Certain wigs have the skin-toned material spanning the entire top of the wig. This is known as a multi-directional wig. It can be parted on the right side, left side, off-center, or in the middle. But that does not mean that you can easily direct the hair any way you like. Some customers become frustrated when they attempt to comb the hair to the part it differently themselves because the hair flips back to the original part.

The hair will only stay parted if it is blown dry in the new direction.

So your best bet is to get your sheitel macher to style it to the new part. Multi-directional wigs are generally more costly though, and a lot of customers find that they don’t change their parts around. A wig can still be beautiful and natural looking without being a multi-directional wig. Each kallah should consider all of a wig’s features before making her decision.

Various Tiers of Wigs 1) Out-of-the-box wigs include Yaffas, Georgies, Michals, Judys and others. This type of wig is more affordable than semi-custom or custom. The cap is usually open weft, and adjustable one-size-fits all. The hair may be synthetic,

blend (50% synthetic/50% human), or 100% human.

The human hair of an out-of-the-box wig is typically The Top/Scalp Asian and has been heavily treated. The hair is stripped of its color, and then dyed. It is also treated with Most wigs these days have a skin top. A skin-toned material various chemicals. Some customers of mine do not

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like the hair because of its not-so-natural feel, yet others

insist on an out-of-the-box because of its low maintenance.

The hair is able to hold style better and for longer. This makes it a smart choice for the budget-conscious because it is less expensive to purchase, and costs less over its longterm maintenance.

Out-of-the-box companies have made great gains in many of their wigs. I’ve seen some companies products evolve over the years to look and feel like a higher end wig. Some have a stretch cap with a multi-directional top, and some have less processed hair. I have noticed, however, that they still shed more than a semi-custom or custom wig. This means that an out-of-the-box wig should not be thinned during the cutting process, because hair will fall out on its own.

2) Semi-custom wigs are the kind that I encourage most of my customers to purchase. Some wellknown semi-custom companies are Freeda, Allegria, and Shevy. A semi-custom wig has hair that is extremely natural to the eye and to the touch because it has not been stripped of its color and then, subsequently dyed. The hair quality is typically the same as a custom wig.

Many caps are stretch caps and come in Small, Medium or Large. It is recommended to purchase a wig that is slightly snug because it stretches minimally over time. The hair is usually hand-sewn, strand, by strand on the top part of the wig, and machine-sewn throughout the rest. Some companies offer a wig that is entirely hand-sewn, for slightly more money. I find that such a wig is comparable to a custom wig, for a fraction of the price.

Fortunately, it is quite simple to shop around when purchasing a semi-custom wig. Find out the company, make and color, then compare prices. (According to halacha, you should be honest with the sheitel machers about your intent to gather information before committing to a purchase.)

Additionally, if you know of a particular brand that you are interested in, but do not know of a sheitel macher who sells

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it, call up the company and ask if there is one in your area.

3) Custom wigs, by definition, vary from piece to piece. A woman buying a custom wig chooses the hair texture, and length. The cap is fitted or molded to match the woman’s hairline. Hair samples are taken to ensure a perfect color match. An owner of a custom wig has something that is unique to her head shape and hair color.

With this said, I do not encourage the average customer to purchase a custom wig. Firstly, they are more costly than a comparable semicustom wig. Secondly, the customer is obligated to purchase it once it has been manufactured. I, for one, was unhappy with a custom wig that I purchased as a kallah. I chose the hair texture and type, only to find that once it was made, it tangled often. I was also unsatisfied with the cap. It was made to match my hairline, yet it never lay right and I always had to be sure that the hair covered my temples.

A good candidate for a custom wig is someone with an exceptionally large or exceptionally small head, someone with curly hair, someone with red or ash blond hair, or someone with an extremely asymmetrical or irregular hairline. (It is important to note that everybody has some asymmetry and irregularity within their hairline.) For those of you readers who are candidates for a custom, but do not have the budget for it, do not dismay. With a little research, and a lot of patience, you may be able to find a semi-custom that meets your needs.

With the above information, you are armed and ready to begin your quest for your first sheitel. A beautiful, comfortable sheitel will help you perform the mitzvah of covering your hair b’simcha. Wear your sheitel with pride—as a queen with a crown that befits her noble station!

Aviva Rizel is the founder and owner of Aviva’s Wigs, located at 525 Chestnut Street in Cedarhurst, NY, and online at http://www.avivaswigs.com/. She can be reached at 516-256-WIGS for appointments, questions or comments.

Find more of her practical sheitel information at http:// kallahmagazine.com/reflections.htm

Kallah Magazine Special Pesach Edition 2010 / 5770

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