volume 1, Issue 2
October 2014
CULTURE AND ENTERTAINMENT IN THE COULEE REGION
Klutch Live at Pearl Street Brewery! Local Places, Local People.
pg.6
h S y t ie r a V l o o h c S d The Ol
26
Let Them See pg. You Sweat rend Yoga T t o H l a c o L e h T
Entertainment thaey Ol’ Fashioned w
ow
pg.20
Pilot
Odyssey CR-V
Ridgeline
Fit Civic
Accord
Crosstour
Insight
CR-Z
Fuel Efficient. Environmentally Sensible. You’ll Love More Miles Per Dollar! www.hondamotorwerks.com Phone: 877-4-A-HYBRID
Check us out!
2
October, 2014 // KlutchChronicle.com
Downtown La Crosse, WI at 4th and Cameron Streets
Lim
ited Time
Wickedly Smoked
Chicken
Bol
Deliciously
Delivered
Sweet
Mad
WHITE RICE, HICKORY SMOKED CHICKEN, SHREDDED CHEESE (FROM WI), LETTUCE, TORTILLA CHIPS, CRAISINS AND RASPBERRY VINAIGRETTE
_or=
_or=
Classic Deluxe
WHITE RICE, HICKORY SMOKED CHICKEN, BACON, SHREDDED CHEESE (FROM WI), LETTUCE, PICO DE GALLO AND MAYO
Locations LA CROSSE, COPELAND AVE. ONALASKA, MARKET PLACE PH: 608.785.2227 PH: 608.783.2227 FAX: 608.785.2224 FAX: 608.783.2226 LA CROSSE, LOSEY BLVD. PH: 608.796.2227 FAX: 608.796.2228
la crosse’s
ultimate viewing venue full menu all ages
s r o F l av
BABurritoCo.com
H Spicy Cajun H
SPANISH RICE, PINTO BEANS, HICKORY SMOKED CHICKEN, SHREDDED CHEESE (FROM WI), CHOLULA HOT SAUCE AND HABANERO HOT SAUCE
d ly M i x e d
welcome
HOLMEN, SQUARE MALL PH: 608.526.6227 FAX: 608.526.6226
Monday
DJ Trivia 8 PM and 2-4-1 Burgers
Tuesday Bar Bingo 9 PM and Fish Tacos
Wednesday
Color Me Bad 9 PM and wings $5/lb
Thursday
Team Trivia 8 PM and Steak tacos
Friday Fish Fry Saturday
College Football- Badgers and bucket specials
Sunday
NFL Sunday Ticket and bucket specials
1128 La Crosse Street La Crosse, WI 54601
www.howiesonlacrosse.com KlutchChronicle.com \\ October, 2014 3
EDITOR’S NOTE Casey Kulinski
ISSUE NO. 2 // OCTOBER, 2014 WWW.KLUTCHCHRONICLE.COM
Last week at our first Klutch Live, with the acoustic stylings of TUGG playing in the background and an awesome pint named Tambois (because we like to be fancy at Klutch) by my side, a smile came to my face. Is this really my job? I get to go out and listen to good music, meet new people, and enjoy a beverage (or two)? After mingling with some readers and hearing their thoughts and opinions, another smile came to my face. I love our community. Not only do I get to work with some pretty cool people, but I get to show everyone how great our area really is and chat with people about it. Needless to say, I was feeling extra blessed that night. So with that I invite you to peruse our October issue and see just a glimpse of all the cool people and things happening right now in your community (and I hope it makes you feel a little blessed too).
ABOUT KLUTCH CHRONICLE Klutch Chronicle brings a fresh and edgy look into the dynamic culture, lifestyles, and entertainment scene in the Coulee Region Community!
Connect With Klutch: OFFICES: 3120 South Ave La Crosse WI 54601
A WORD FROM THE ASSOCIATE PUBLISHER
PHONE: 608-796-8780
Michelle L. Jerome It’s sweet that I get a chance to share a bit of myself, my values, and my interests in publications I’ve created. (I was going to say it’s fancy but Casey evidentially stole my go-to adjective. She’s still my favorite editor.) When brainstorming ideas or getting those during-a-long-drive epiphanies, I give a stab at what “Thee Public” cares about and run with it. One aspect that I consistently incorporate into my work is the world of volunteering. I’ll cut to the chase. I want you to volunteer. If everyone pitched in for the sake of it, the world would be oh so beautiful. Pick something you’re interested in, find out who needs help in this said interest, and go help out. If you’re strapped for ideas, check out our volunteering section. You could even post a photo to our Facebook page or email us a photo of you exhibiting your amazing volunteering ways. Volunteering isn’t just a once a year gig for many people. It’s part of life. Now go volunteer so you can be fancy. (There, I got my fancy in.)
EMAIL: info@muellermediacorp.com FACEBOOK: www.facebook.com/klutchchronicle www.klutchchronicle.com
THE KLUTCH CREW:
inside
ARTWORK ON THE COVER “Sunset Farm” Acrylic mixed water media. by Becky Herlitzke
06
Klutch Live What’s Up
27
Volunteer Do onto others...
Sunset Farm was inspired by the evening view from the artist’s La Crosse area farm. “We are very fortunate to have a western exposure from the top of a bluff overlooking the Mississippi River.” The piece was created by layering textural acrylic medium enhanced with luscious pigment. The artist chose to place complimentary colors near each other in simple shapes employing only hue changes to capture abstract form and set the tone for emotional response. As the sunset produced an exciting opportunity for the artist, the painting evokes a similar response for the viewer.
09
Hometown Headlines The Scoop on our region
28
Klutch Calendar Coming down the pipe
13
Family What’s most important
14
Technology Geeks unite
16
A&E A monthly dose of culture
25
Food & Drink Down the hatch
26
Health and Fitness Taking care of you
m or e. ..
9 Attraction of the Month 10 Meet & Cheese 12 The Word from City Hall 12 WTF? Stories 15 App Review 19 Klutch Cares 23 Tunes 25 Drink of the Month 30 On the Flip Side
this issue 4
October, 2014 // KlutchChronicle.com
Publisher: Rick Mueller Associate Publisher: Michelle Jerome Editor: Casey Kulinski Creative Director: Jason Keeney Graphic Designers: Will Adamany and Josh Walker Advertising Strategists: Lee Worrell, Rachel Albrechtson, Jenna Walker Copy Editor: Susan Miller Photographers: Bruce Defries, Jenna Walker Distribution: Citywide Marketing Services Advertising Info: You know you want to be seen in Klutch! Contact us by email or call 608-796-8780 for more information on rates, distribution, and sizes. Contributor/Submissions: Please submit art and writing samples for our submissions pages at http://klutchchronicle.com/writing-art-submissions/. Interested in contributing to Klutch? Please contact info@muellermediacorp.com Internships/Jobs: Internships are available at Klutch! Check us out and apply at klutchchronicle.com
www.klutchchronicle.com
and so it begins... MUSINGS OF AN EX-PAT Article: Blake Auler-Murphy
O
ur city is a lot of things. I say ‘our city’ even though I recently moved away from La Crosse. So why would I write about the lively culture that still exists in La Crosse? I am actually burdened with qualifications in that field, and it often has me wishing I had never left. I lived in La Crosse most of my life, took in a lot of what it has to offer, and made an impact in the arts community. I still maintain good relationships with a lot of working artists in my old hood. Alas, I had to leave, and as such, I have to explore a new city. I am examining and scrutinizing it, and while it makes me miss La Crosse, it offers new ideas for how La Crosse could be an even cooler city. At the same time, I am still walking in the spider webs of La Crosse, keeping up to date with a lot of you through Tweetbook and InstaTwitface. So, if you do not already know me, consider this an introduction. We will get to know each other as I remind you of the reasons your friends sometimes leave ‘Paradise,’ and how badly we want to bring what we find in the great wide world back to La Crosse. I will also wax on about the things I miss that La Crosse is definitely doing right, while pointing out where the Venn diagrams of La Crosse’s many offerings converge with an ease that sometimes blindsides the unexpectant observer. Friday evenings in summer and fall present a perfect biodome for exactly this kind of blending. Autumn has arrived and that means incredible amounts of amazing local food. There is no rival for buying the bounty from a farmers market. While it seems like
every neighborhood in my new city has a farmers market, I sincerely miss the sense of community found in La Crosse’s markets. Specifically reflecting on the Cameron Park Farmers Market brings to mind the Athenian Agora, the historic cosmopolitan market of Athens. On Friday evenings, the Cameron Park market is alive and ripe with culture. You will find outdoor yoga classes and vendors selling wares beyond food. The market even boasts some of the best live music in the community. It provides a space for intergenerational bonding that is unique in the community. A glint of livelihood can be seen in the eyes of toddlers and elders alike. I guess this is to say that as you are basking in the sunset, eating some of the freshly prepared food, sitting next to a bag of your recently bought produce and watching the dancing of old and young alike, know that you are the envy of people like me. La Crosse, don’t rush to change your farmers markets; they are perfect as they are. Raised in La Crosse, Blake returned to his hamlet after undergrad and propped up a few ventures into cultural expansion in the River City. When he is not discovering new blades of grass to compare with old, he is trolling the web wondering if the grass was ever greener. Feedback welcomed at: https://www.facebook.com/musingsofanexpat https://twitter.com/blakeaulermurph Follow along on Instagram @blakeaulermurphy
30 Days for Set$30 your roots and GROW with us! This is more than a yoga studio, it’s a community where we empower each other to move our bodies, explore our minds, and connect with our true nature. We offer a variety of yoga classes that will help you develop or deepen your practice. Root Down Yoga is La Crosse’s only hot yoga studio offering Power Vinyasa yoga in the tradition of Baron Baptiste – a style of yoga that is accessible to everyone regardless of age, ability, or experience. Power Vinyasa • Yin Yoga • Absolute Beginner’s Class Guided Meditation • Prenatal • Yoga Nidra
Join us in Tulum, Mexico for a beach and yoga retreat Jan. 17-24, 2015 1217 Caledonia St., Suite A, La Crosse, WI 54603 Phone 608-519-2467 • www.rootdownyogastudio.com KlutchChronicle.com \\ October, 2014
5
october
14
th
PEEPS PLACES Each month we will be bringing Klutch Live to a new venue around the Coulee Region- you don’t want to miss this event!
at
2014
7-9pm
Come on down for a night at Howie’s with us! Bring your coupon for a free pint and coozie, watch some sports, and hang with our awesome staff!
y pin our fi t is r Fre st e!!
la crosse’s
ultimate viewing venue
is h t g Brinpon in e cou eceiv
e e fr n t & i p 1 ozie co and
r
On October 14th, 2014 during the Klutch Live event at Howie’s. Valid October 14, 2014 from 7-9pm only. Limit one per customer, may not be copied or reproduced in any way without permission from Klutch Chronicle.
6
October, 2014 // KlutchChronicle.com
full menu
all ages
welcome
1128 La Crosse Street La Crosse, WI 54601
www.howiesonlacrosse.com
CE
S
LO
EOPLE LP A C
P LO CAL
vi e r
at
LA
ew
SEPTEMBER KLUTCH LIVE EVENT - PSB
W
hat better way to kick off the first of many Klutch Live events than with good tunes, free T-shirts and a local brew? The answer to that question is: there is no better way. Along with Tami, Joe, and our friends at Pearl Street Brewery, we had a great time meeting some of our awesome readers (Erica, our favorite professional dog walker, and our very own columnist, Bri, among others) and also introducing ourselves to some new faces (who were pretty awesome too). We are excited to say we gave out 83 free pints to patrons! With Pearl Street Brewery hosting their Pints for Prints deal that night as well, patrons were able to buy one of Pearl Street’s finest, bring a T-shirt (or buy one) and get one of three prints put on
the shirt for free (sweet deal!). Throughout the night La Crosse’s very own local band TUGG was also filling the (rather packed) room with sweet acoustic tunes. I’ll say it again, what is better than that? Each month we will be bringing you Klutch Live at a different location around the area, but always with a great deal and always with great company. We want to give our readers an incentive to get out and maybe try a new place while making some new friends in the process. We love our readers and want to hear from you! So come on down each month to Klutch Live - say hi and tell us what you think.
KlutchChronicle.com \\ October, 2014
7
Freaky Fact #1 - look for more throughout this issue of Klutch! The Casino is haunted by a barber named Paul Josten who had a shop at that location during Prohibition. He murdered two people and wounded his estranged wife and then shot himself in the head afterward. Dan, the owner of the Casino, reports hearing footsteps well after bar time.
to p f i v e
5
the soap box Moody Blues @ La Crosse Center on 9-2: This was a fantastic show for us old people.....not sure I saw anyone under the age of 40 there though. Somewhat disappointing to not have some younger crowd there to see how good it was. ~ tschwabenbauer
Cooler weather means i get to wear my cardigans and flannel again. it’s all about layers. ~ Jason Sean Lajter
Shout out to Mybigfatbloodymary’s very own, almost famous, Greg. The man who truly has the best bloodies in town. Especially when his wife is the one making them. ~ Love, Mybigfatlongblackhair
Yea for cooler weather, pumpkin lattes and scarves. ~ Ashley Etter
Big shout out to Don and Donna of Justin Trails Resort and everyone involved in putting on the 9th annual Justin Trails Open. Had a blast and already looking forward to next year! ~ K Bomb
Here’s to the cast and crew of Mary Poppins at the LCT- great job! Loved it! ~ CJ
Want to thank a person or group for a job well done or fantastic deed? Someone need a special congratulations? Give us your shout out on our Facebook www.facebook/klutchchronicle and it could be published in next month’s Klutch!
Fun for the Whole Family!
Enjoy this fun festival that marks the rebirth and celebrates the rich history of Downtown La Crosse. Discover free historical tours, food, fun entertainment, horse drawn carriage and trolley rides, children’s games, history hunts, cooking contests and more!
Downtown Mainstreet Inc.
608-784-0440
Many Free Events! Check our website for information and events L ACROSSEDOWNTOWN.COM 8
October, 2014 // KlutchChronicle.com
2 truths and
Halloa lie ween Editio n There’s a $1,000 fine for using Silly String in Hollywood on Halloween..
In the UK, white cats are thought to bring bad luck, not black cats.
Trick-or-treating was invented during the Great Depression as a way for communities to supply food to those in need. Source: The Chive The lie: It’s a nice thought, but we all know that Tick-or-treating was all about the mischief and treats.
Saturday, October 11, 2014
1
Dish soap
Because all your clean dishes should still have some trace of food smell, even after washing them.
2 3
Deodorant
Cover up the smell of sweat with subtle hints of nutmeg, cloves and cinnamon.
Give a shout out!
HISTORIC DOWNTOWN day
Pumpkin spice products that should not exist.
Dog food/treats
Can’t get enough pumpkin spice in your diet? We’re sure Fido’s taste buds would love to be enlightened with delicious, versatile pumpkin spice.
4
Pringles
“We’ve run out of ideas, how about something gimmicky and unbelievable enough that consumers would buy it out of novelty rather than expecting a quality product?”
5
Vodka
REALLY? As if Burnett’s isn’t stereotypical enough of college girls, this seasonal vodka could actually be a good excuse to miss your Friday class or work because you’re still sick from ingestion. By: Katis Svitasky
headlines Downtown Parking! GROWING HOME TOWN
yep
oop The Sc THE COULEE REGION
FROM
PAINS
L
Article: Wendy Allen
recognized they’d gotten off easy for so many years. On the opposite end of the spectrum, visitors and those Parking in Downtown La Crosse who have lived in is EASY and at many times FREE! other cities didn’t Adapting to Parking mind paying for Two FREE hours of parking on our Changes Downtown. parking. Katie Streets Monday- Friday 8 am - 6 pm! Bittner, who moved Three FREE hours of parking in our here four years ago Ramps Monday- Friday 8 am - 6 pm! from the Twin Cities, said, “I think paying a Crosse’s downtown has a FREE Parking on our Streets and in our to park is completely conundrum. A vibrant downtown Parking Ramps on Evenings and Weekends! reasonable and is scene requires businesses, Exceptions apply to overnight parking from 1 am - 8 am. just an expectation businesses require patrons, and patrons in most cities.” MORE INFORMATION AT LACROSSEDOWNTOWN.COM require parking, but there’s nowhere to build A group of UW-L more parking in this town tucked between a students said, big river and steep bluffs, and residents are “Madison is so much used to parking wherever they want while worse,” and “I’m broke, but at least you get my business is small and we have to watch keeping their pennies in their pockets. every expense. We just can’t afford to a few hours for free.” In April of this year, the city of La Crosse provide parking right now.” Another polarizing issue comes with the instituted a paid parking system in the In recognition of this predicament, some question, if we must have paid parking, who ramps downtown, which was met early on shoppers say they would rather pay the should pay for it businesses, employees or with resistance and even vandalism of the parking than burden small-business owners patrons? payment kiosks. Today, after addressing Parking in Downtown La Crosse for fear they will pick up and leave the For many standalone businesses outside the vandalism and improving signage and is EASY and at many timesasFREE! district again, many businesses did back of the downtown area, building or acquiring communication, the city is working through in theofearly 1980s after parking is a necessary and expected part Two FREE hours parking on our the mall was built. the longer-term challenges of people Confusion still reigns among the of doing business, so from that perspective, Streets Monday- Friday 8 am - 6 pm! avoiding the ramps due to misinformation, general public, even after six months of it may be reasonable to ask La Crosse’s shortage of street parking due to this Three FREE hours of parkingand in our implementation communication - very downtown businesses to contribute to the avoidance, and in general, helping La few people hourly parking rate or Ramps MondayFriday 8knew am -the 6 pm! ramps’ upkeep and security. Audrey Kader, Crosse businesses and residents adapt to that there were free hours in the ramps, let District 11 City Council member and chair of Parking on our Streets and in the changes. FREE our So here’s alone how many hours were free. the Parking Utility Board, said that La Crosse Taking to the streets, we surveyed Parking Ramps on Evenings and Weekends! a primer: taxpayers have historically shouldered passersby at random on a few parkingExceptions applyDaytime to overnightstreet parking parking from 1 am - is 8 am. free with a twothe entire cost of ramp maintenance and related questions. The first interesting find hour limit. MORE INFORMATION AT LACROSSEDOWNTOWN.COM improvements - essentially subsidizing was that while some downtown businesses Daytime ramp parking has three free parking for everyone who makes use of the complained of congestion and lack of hours and is $0.75 per hour thereafter (with downtown area. When a parking space parking, people on the street most often said the exception of the Riverside ramp, which is leased, those fees go toward offsetting that yes, traffic moved slowly in the narrow has no fee). a bit of those maintenance costs. One Ramp and street parking are free on evenings and weekends. The fees are here to stay and most likely will “Madison is so much worse,” and “I’m broke, but at least increase slowly in the future to help create a you get a few hours for free.” better balance between tax and pay-per-use funds, so the city and Downtown Mainstreet Group of UW-L students are doing what they can to educate people and help alleviate the pain of change where they can. Downtown Mainstreet has created day, the city may be able to redirect those downtown streets but that they didn’t have offset funds to other city projects. But for signs reminding folks of the free parking and much trouble with daytime parking, and at now, even with leases and daily ramp use maps of the ramps. Kader said the city will night people said they had no trouble at all. increasing, Kader said that taxpayers are be increasing the frequency of public transit When told some shoppers have complained still covering a disproportionate percentage routes to help provide more opportunities they couldn’t find nearby parking, most for people to come downtown without a car. of ramp upkeep. respondents looked unconcerned, saying And some businesses are supporting biking Robin Moses, executive director of they believe these are a vocal minority. or walking to work by providing dedicated Downtown Mainstreet Inc., said that an “People need to understand that a big part bicycle parking and showers. added benefit to businesses asking their of shopping in a downtown district is about Bittner said, “I would give the changes employees to use the ramps is that it leaves walking outdoors. That’s what makes it so time to be adapted to by the public. Again, street parking more accessible to shoppers, different from the mall and so nice,” said allowing them to pop in and out quickly. as someone who has moved to the area, I one resident before rushing off to meet a “We all have to do our part to make visiting find our parking quite desirable compared friend for coffee. La Crosse a pleasant experience for all,” she with other places I have lived. I have spent “I spend a decent amount of time time in many ramps that have cost a lot to said. downtown, and parking can be a bit park in and felt generally unsafe. This is not Businesses that cover the cost of frustrating and discouraging sometimes,” something I have ever felt in La Crosse.” employees’ parking also alleviate the worry said Hannah Hoaglund, an eight-year Overall, there seems to be general of finding a spot before work in a downtown resident who works downtown. “But discomfort about the changes among that is increasingly busy. Hoaglund said, ultimately, it’s pretty easy to find parking in “My business has dedicated parking, so I’m businesses, employees and patrons, and La Crosse compared to other cities. It’s all while our small, unscientific survey also pretty fortunate. If it didn’t, I would probably about perspective.” revealed a vocal minority who were quite find the situation a lot more stressful.” Many Reactions to the new paid parking system, upset, the majority of those affected are downtown workers I spoke with, however, however, were much more varied. With only said their employers did not cover the cost of irritated but quietly taking it all in stride. a few exceptions, responses correlated with their parking space and called it unfair since how long the person has lived in La Crosse. We want your opinion! Post your comments at they are at the mercy of their employer’s Those who grew up in the city remembered facebook.com/KlutchChronicle or email us choice of location. the free parking fondly and missed it; a very From the business perspective, an owner at klutch@muellermediacorp.com few believed it’s a sign the city is in financial who preferred to remain anonymous said, trouble or getting greedy. Most residents “I feel lucky to be located downtown, but surveyed, however, were mildly irritated but
1. 2. 3.
Free!
Downtown Parking!
1. 2. 3.
Free!
KlutchChronicle.com \\ October, 2014
9
Downtown Park
in Downtown La Crosse 1. Parking is EASY and at many times FREE! FREE hours of parking on our 2. Two Streets Monday- Friday 8 am - 6 pm! Ove Three FREE hours of parking in our 3. Ramps Monday- Friday 8 am SATUR - 6 pm! FEATURING:
Free!
HALLO SAV
7 PM P OV
FREE Parking on our StreetsCASH and iP Parking Ramps on Evenings and H ALLO W E E N H A N GO V E R We COS
Exceptions apply to overnight parking from 1 Ram CAS H PR I ZE S FO BE-S8T a
50% of all proceeds will be donated to local non
Oh, the beginning of fall! The RSVP, Children's Museum ofleaves La Crosse, Grow wil Yo 50% of all proceeds MORE INFORMATION AT LACROSSEDOW RSVP, Children’s Muse start changing colors, students headBY: back Featuring: SPONSORED BY: to school, and preparationsSPONSORED begin for many of La Crosse’s annual events. We have Oktoberfest, Applefest, a plethora of 5Ks, and our all-time favorite, La Crosse Magazine’s Halloween Bash! (Yes, we are shamelessly plugging our own event as the Attraction of the Month. Deal with it. ) Parking in Downtown La Crosse The 3rd Annual Halloween Bash will take is EASY and at many times FREE! place at 7 p.m. on Saturday, Nov. 1, and it will be hosted Overtime Bar on TwoatFREE hoursSports of parking on our Ward Avenue. Streets Monday- Friday 8 am - 6 pm! Nov. 1 marks theFREE end of mostof Halloween Three hours parking in our celebrations,Ramps but thatMondaydoes not Friday mean you no- 6 pm! 8 am longer have a purpose for the costume you Parking onplanning. our Streets and i spent three hours FREE or three months Ramps on Evenings The Halloween Parking Bash will be having its and We Exceptions applycash to overnight parking costume contest again with prizes for from 1 am - 8 a the best overall costumes, as wellATasLACROSSEDOW best MORE INFORMATION ‘80s costumes. The Bash is an event where people can come listen to some music (Brat Pack Radio is the featured performance!), eat some food, take advantage of the drink specials, and have a great time all while helping some of the local nonprofit organizations around La Crosse. Half of the proceeds raised from the Bash will be donated to organizations such as RSVP, the Children’s Museum of La Crosse, Grow Your Brain, and the American Red Cross.
Downtown Park
Handmade Pott Children & Adult C
321 Main St. La Cro 608-782-3904 www.generousearthpo
1. 2. 3.
Paint Your Own Po Jewelry & Glass F Week-Long and Summer Camp
205 Pearl St. La Cros 608-782-7248 www.allglazedup
Free!
IF YOU GO: When: Saturday, Nov. 1 @ 7 p.m. Where: Overtime Sports Bar (down by Marcus Theatres) 1920 Ward Ave La Crosse Cost: $10 a person $5 for students
Check out the ad on the back cover for more details!
at Pet Me Scratch Me
Coming October 2014 – the all new
Pet Me Scratch Me South!
Located next to Batteries Plus in the Shelby Mall.
’s t a h W ck e D n o
Art Rageous
ial Spec only teven ers! off 10
October 16th from 3-6pm Holmen Square 500 N. Holmen Drive #504 Holmen, WI 54636 Phone: (608) 526-8787 www.artrageousac.com October, 2014 // KlutchChronicle.com
Interested in hosting a Meet and Cheese event? Visit our website www.klutchchronicle.com or call 608-796-8780 for more details.
In it for the dogs.
Article: Becca Dargatz
PET ME SCRATCH ME
C
atering to man’s (and woman’s) best friend since January 2006, Pet Me Scratch Me was the first dog daycare in the Coulee Region. Now, eight years later, many original and new members attend for its luxury boarding, spa services, and a retail section that includes a knowledgeable staff to help you find the best products for your beloved canines. Owners Stace and Stacy Spencer understand dogs. The Spencers have two of their own, a Basset Hound named Bill and a French Bulldog named Emma, but they want all dogs to feel like they are a part of the family when they visit Pet Me Scratch Me. Contrary to popular belief (and dog treat commercials), it takes more than a Dingo Bone to make a dog’s day. The staff at Pet Me Scratch Me take the time to get to know each dog; once they understand
on you. The owners have 14 years of experience in multiple-dog daycare and are very educated on how to care for dogs in a pack environment. While many daycares have popped up over the last few years, Pet Me Scratch Me was born from a love of dogs and the knowledge and experience required to safely care for dogs in this unique type of environment. Not only do the ongoing waiting lists attest to the staff’s commitment and dedication, but the positive feedback from customers and the sloppy kisses from the clients reward the owners and employees every day. “We are in it for the dogs,” says Stacy Spencer. “We want to be there for the dogs, not just for the convenience of the owners; we want to make their days the best days possible.” In September 2011 the owners constructed a new building that houses 23 boarding suites and over 5000 square feet of indoor daycare space, as well as a very large outdoor play yard. At Pet Me Scratch Me, dogs are always occupied and loved
“We want to be there for the dogs, not just for the convenience of the owners; we want to make their days the best days possible.” Stacy Spencer
the dog’s personality, the staff can then cater to the dog’s likes and dislikes. While this might not seem important to some people, healthy, happy dogs need social interaction, exercise and guidance. Pet Me Scratch Me is a prime, all-inclusive training and daycare facility providing exercise, socialization, and specialized daycare with a strong emphasis on educating both the human and the canine companion. As a community, the socialization dogs learn at daycare benefits everyone. It can mean the difference between a happy, well-behaved dog approaching you during an evening stroll through your neighborhood, or an aggressive, out-of-control dog trying to jump
so they are not anxious in their kennels. By including add-on services such as daycare, walks, playtime, and snuggle time, the dogs remain active. “What makes us stand out from all of the competition is first and foremost our dedication to the safety of dogs in our care,” says Stacy. “We do not compromise on our policies for the sake of convenience or bringing in additional revenue.” Due to the success of the original location in Onalaska, the owners are very excited and happy to announce the opening of a second location in south La Crosse during October 2014. The new facility will be located at 4222 Mormon Coulee Road next
to Batteries Plus in the Shelby Mall, and will be similar in design to the Onalaska facility. There will be a large daycare space along with two large outdoor areas complete with artificial turf. Luxury boarding will be available with the same-sized suites currently offered in Onalaska. The new location will also have a retail boutique featuring many of the healthy foods and products currently carried in Onalaska. And, if a spa day is what your pet is interested in, grooming will be offered as well. “With the addition of another facility, customers who currently live in La Crosse will have a closer option, and reservations in Onalaska will become more available,” Stacy says. While Pet Me Scratch Me operates in a small city, many customers who have moved
later contact them to say they have been unable to find a comparable daycare, even in larger metropolitan areas. It should be no surprise then that numerous individuals have approached the owners from places such as Milwaukee, Wis., and Minneapolis, Minn., inquiring about franchising opportunities. The owners intend to be equipped to sell their first franchise by the end of 2014 and already have a few prospective buyers anxiously waiting. Taking care of four-legged children has been a dream come true for the Spencers, and though they may have a waiting list for daycare, according to dogs everywhere, they are worth the wait. The combination of Pet Me Scratch Me’s safety record, experience, and genuine love for dogs is what will continue to fuel its future success.
Pet Me Scratch Me (608) 781-Woof (9663) 2551 E. Main St. Onalaska, WI 54650
www.petmescratchme.com KlutchChronicle.com \\ October, 2014
11
THE WORD
headlines
oop The Sc THE COULEE REGION
FROM CITY HAL L
HOME TOWN
BNSF RAIL UPDATE: To appease opponents of their plans to build a second, four-mile-long railroad track next to existing track in order to fulfill increased demand for rail transportation, Burlington Northern Railway has communicated a list of items it is willing to offer the City of La Crosse in hopes of the City agreeing to not dispute BNSF’s ownership of the land on which the planned expansion will take place. While BNSF has publicly expressed confidence that the company owns the land instead of the City, the company also wishes to move forward with the project as quickly as possible, resulting in a list of incentives the City is currently considering. Newest to this list is remodeling the cityowned Forest Hills Golf Course, perhaps in response to concerns that the course would cease to exist if the expansion took place. The current offer presented to the city includes not only the golf course upgrade but also paying for a special foam trailer and out-of-state training for around 50 firefighters for disaster control, covering the cost of moving underground utility lines, upgrading several rail crossings, and building a passage under the railroad for golf carts and pedestrians to use. In addition, because expansion would happen on seven acres of marsh, BNSF is working with the Wisconsin DNR and Army Corps of Engineers on remediation obligations. CITY INCLUDES GENDER IDENTITY AS A PROTECTED STATUS: The La Crosse City Council voted to amend a city ordinance dealing with equal access to housing, city resources and facilities, and other public areas to include discrimination based on gender identity. Currently, exclusion based on sex, race, religion, color, ancestry, age, disability, marital status, legal sources of income, physical appearance, sexual orientation, political activity, familial status, and student status are all prohibited. While the State of Wisconsin does not protect based on gender identity, municipalities around the state are adding gender identity to their discrimination policies. Only four other municipalities have such ordinances, including Milwaukee, Madison, Appleton, and Cudahy. La Crosse is the second municipality in the State, after Cudahy, to do so unanimously. RENTAL REGISTRATION RULED LEGAL: La Crosse’s new rental registration program was deemed legal by a La Crosse County judge after the decision was postponed three times. 34 La Crosse landlords signed on to be a part of the lawsuit, originally filed in May, citing concerns that the City ordinance conflicted with State legislation. The program was disputed because it requires property owners to register their rental units with the city and pay a nominal fee for each unit’s application, and gives the City the authority to fine if a landlord is operating without registering their property. Registration is contingent upon proper inspection of the unit, and neighborhood advocates have supported the program because they believe having all rental properties regularly inspected contributes to safer housing for renters and less degradation of single-family homes in neighborhoods. VOTER ID LAW REINSTATED: Wisconsin’s Voter ID law articulating what documents and identifications citizens need in order to vote was reinstated by the Chicago Federal Court of Appeals, meaning voters will need to provide state-issued photo identification such as a driver’s license in order to cast a ballot in November. The law passed in 2011 and has been in legal limbo for the past three years. Proponents of the law praised the ruling because they view it as making for more clean elections by discouraging voter fraud; on the flip side, this law has also been heavily criticized as an attempt to suppress the vote of students, racial minorities, and the poor because they might have a more difficult time obtaining a photo ID, which is needed if you do not have a current driver’s license. Opponents also point out that only around thirty prosecuted cases of voter fraud occurred in Wisconsin since 2008, according to testimony given in the appeal, and include anything from convicted felons voting to improperly collected signatures. While voters can use a driver’s license, students in the area cannot use their student ID cards, according to the law. Photo IDs can be obtained at the local DMV.
See next month’s issue for a complete list of what you need to take with you to the polls!
FROM
GREENGRASS CAFÉ
For all the breakfast fans out there, Greengrass Café may be your new favorite stop. Located on Campbell Road, right next to the UW-L campus, this little café packs a huge punch. The café opened Thursday, Aug. 27, and it is owned and run by Vivek Pande, an assistant professor at UW-L, and Don Greengrass, a student at UW-L. They decided to open the café in that location because there was a need for it, not only for the students but for the surrounding neighborhoods as well. Pande emphasizes that Greengrass is “kid-friendly and it caters to the surrounding neighborhoods besides the UW-L community.” So why will breakfast lovers start to swarm
Greengrass Café? Well, the café offers something not many restaurants offer around La Crosse: all day breakfast. From opening to closing time, anyone and everyone is able to order some of their favorite breakfast items at Greengrass. Pande explains that they offer breakfast all day because “a lot of people like breakfast. People order breakfast until 9 o’clock at night.” With that in mind, Greengrass offers a build-yourown option that is priced out for the customer’s convenience. This means you pay for what you want, and they even have brunch specials on Saturdays and Sundays during prime football time. Don’t worry; you’re able to enjoy the game while you eat.
ECOFARCE: BRING BACK OUR NATURE Monkeys. I’m so tired of hearing people whine about monkeys that were held captive in a concrete jungle in the Midwest. I thought they were adorable, too … and sad looking. In 2007, when the city of La Crosse couldn’t afford the necessary updates to bring the circa 1928 Myrick Park Zoo up to code, they closed the gates and shipped the animals out. The monkeys went to a retirement home with real, living trees and fellow previously enslaved monkeys to live the good life. The two 22-yearold sister bears who had never seen life outside of their concrete pit finally were reunited with a closer resemblance to nature at a betterequipped center. When the zoo was initially facing closure, a group of hopeful locals and Rotary Clubs joined together and called up the folks at Hixon Forest Nature Center (which had been around since 1983) to join forces and create a superior nature center with indigenous (meaning native, in case ya don’t know) animals and a bunch of other cool stuff. The
interim director at the time thought the idea was great and the EcoPark idea was born. The nature programs and school field trips that nearly every kid around has done at least once over the last 20 to 30 years would continue! Hooray!! Oh crud … wait … the budget was waaaay more than anyone anticipated. Then an unethical, money-grabbing, ill-experienced director came along with a song and dance and some new fancy plans (sans animals) that would charge an entrance fee. He left town just as quickly as he moved in without even giving his mediocre plans a chance. His successor was well-intended, but much of the damage had been done and the organization is kaput. Regardless of pointing fingers, the whole thing is quashed. So, an empty building and some park land stands vacant. A park without its eco. But is the eco gone? The structure stands in the middle of a wild marsh, a trail-filled forest, bluffland access, thousands of wild animals, and a gem of a city-maintained play place called
Greengrass Café has a variety of items on its menu other than breakfast, including frozen yogurt, burgers, sandwiches, and even mac and cheese. There are also some amazing cheese curds! Pande and Greengrass hope to start special or promotional events as the business continues to grow; they are thinking of having happy hour as well as food and drink specials correlating with sporting events that are happening at the time. The main thing Pande wants people to know about Greengrass Café is that “it’s a familyfriendly, cheerful, clean breakfast café that just so happens to have a liquor license.”
- By Jenna Smith
Myrick Park. The organization was supposed to celebrate nature … the nature that engulfs the building. The heart of the whole thing was nature education and programming: kids catching bugs, learning about life cycles as they flap their arms in the name of monarch wings, coming home with dirt under their nails from digging up sow bugs in the forest. That’s where it’s at. And the animals? It’s Wisconsin. There has to be a financially feasible version of a petting zoo with farm animals, maybe a few local fauna that would have enough room to roam, and some volunteers to feed and manage the operation. No charge, just donations. Wouldn’t it be wonderful for a group to step in to take on this dream? Because of our research at Klutch, we know that an awesome local nonprofit is keeping the Enchanted Forest kids’ event alive; can someone keep the rest of our nature dreams alive?
- By an Ex-Pat Nonprofit Insider
#WTF!? NFL reportedly asks musicians to pay to play the halftime show at the Super Bowl In an attempt to capitalize on its large audience, the National Football League is asking performers to pay to play the Super Bowl halftime show, according to The Wall Street Journal. In the past, performers wouldn’t exactly get paid to play the show, but their expenses - travel, production costs, et cetera - were covered. Katy Perry, Coldplay, and Rihanna have all received notification from the NFL of the League’s interest in having them play the halftime show, which typically attracts more than 110 million viewers, but the proposition received reportedly “chilly” reactions from the performers’ representatives. It’s kind of like asking a chef to pay you for eating their sevencourse dinner because it’s a great opportunity to publicize their cooking skills. What’s next? Here at Klutch we are thinking about starting up a band and taking donations. Super Bowl 49, here we come! Break out the tinfoil hats and chips and guac; football season is back!
12
SENATOR SURVIVOR The Discovery Channel has introduced a revolutionary survival challenge of congressional proportions - this time with two U.S. senators from opposing parties attempting to work together to survive a week on a remote island. “Rival Survival,” airing Oct. 29, pairs senators Jeff Flake, a Republican from Arizona, and Martin Heinrich, a Democrat from New Mexico, in a survival challenge taking place on the Marshall Islands in the northern Pacific Ocean. The program features your typical survival show fare: lack of a clean water source, food available only if you collect or kill it yourself, nothing to entertain you but the company of people you probably hate - all perfect ingredients for a reality TV masterpiece. Though the description sounds a lot like the plot of a Seth Rogen film, “Rival Survival” should serve as an example of Republicans and Democrats working together, and hopefully will inspire their colleagues to do the same, according to a joint statement by both men. Elected officials already subject themselves to public scrutiny just by occupying office;
October, 2014 // KlutchChronicle.com
however, “Rival Survival” brings this scrutiny to a whole new level. Klutch expects the senators will use this opportunity in front of a national audience to actually demonstrate compromise and commonality, and also hopes their colleagues will consider their example. But just as importantly, we’re also happy the senators didn’t choose “Naked and Afraid” as a platform for their message.
get your fix @ klutchchronicle.com
family
uff fun st THE
FOR FAMILY FOR THE FAM OCTOBER 1-11 ANNUAL COSTUME SWAP 10 am-4 pm @ Parenting Place • Tickets: Free • Don’t get your Halloween costume at the last minute! After dropping off a clean and gently used costume, return on the 11th to choose a new one! OCTOBER 3-5 A WRINKLE IN TIME 7:30 pm (2 pm on Oct. 5) @ Veterans Studio Theatre (Theatre G) • Tickets: $9 • Based off the novel of the same name, come and watch the stage portrayal of Meg’s journey to find her lost father! OCTOBER 4 APPLE AFFAIR BIKE TOUR 9 am-3 pm @ Critzman Auto Body in Galesville, WI • Tickets: $15/person until Sept. 21, $20/ person Sept. 22-Oct. 3, $23/person day of event (prices do not include participant shirts; addition $12-$17 for short or long sleeve shirt). • This event mixes bicycling and the area’s great apple orchards - and warm apple pie! Bike through the Coulee Region with plenty of route options. Kids 13 and under ride free!
Enchanted Forest children’s event goes home to Hixon Forest.
T
Article: Michelle Jerome
BACK TO THE FOREST
OCTOBER 4 GLOW IN THE DEKE 5K FUN RUN 7 pm-9 pm @ UW-L Track • Tickets: $25/person; Children = free • Participate in the annual glow in the dark race and kid dash that remembers Derrick Kroll who was highly involved in the La Crosse community. There will be music and fun, and let’s not forget all the glow sticks!
he Enchanted Forest lives on for the 15th year in a row! This nonscary trick or treat wonderland is moving back to Hixon Forest where the fun started! For this event, the trails are transformed into fairytale scenes with kid-friendly characters passing out goodies along the way. Each year, thousands gather at this fundraising event to make crafts, have hot cocoa and cider, dance a little jig and sing along with children’s musician, Hans Mayer. The traditions continue with a new performance by The Magic of Isaiah! The trick or treat adventure will lead to a mid-forest open field featuring an event tent decked out with plump pumpkins, straw bales and fall charm. Enchanted guests will register at the Hixon Forest trailhead in the parking lot at the top of Milson Court, La Crosse. They’re squeezing all the fun into a one-day-only event, so mark your calendars for Oct. 25, 2014. And guess what? The contribution fee has been dropped to only $5 per child (12 and under) and $1 per adult with a cap of $20 per family. In the beginning, Enchanted Forest was started by Hixon Forest Nature Center, which once lived in the building now housing WisCorps (Wisconsin Conservation Corps). It’s only fitting that
OCTOBER 4 & NOVEMBER 1 IT’S CRAIG KUNCE DAY 11 am-11:30 am @ The Children’s Museum • Tickets: Free with museum admission • Come to a meet and greet with author/illustrator Craig Kunce where he will answer questions about his books and drawings!
WisCorps will now be the beneficiary and coordinator of the fundraiser. Not only do they have a building in common, but WisCorps crews maintain the trails that Enchanted Forest will be held on. The core of the old nature center was environmental education, and WisCorps embodies that and more. Since WisCorps’ founding in 2009, crew leaders have mentored young adults while working more than 42,000 hours in environmental restoration, growing produce for food pantries, basic home repairs for the elderly and people with disabilities, graffiti removal from parks and natural areas, and disaster relief. WisCorps members gain valuable life and employment skills that will help them become active members of their communities, as well as future leaders in the Wisconsin workforce. WisCorps is excited that Mayo Clinic Health System will be presenting Enchanted Forest to the Coulee Region community to benefit WisCorps! Grab your fairies and super heroes (boys and girls can be both!) and head to Enchanted Forest 2014 on Oct. 25 from 2 p.m.-6 p.m. at Hixon Forest in La Crosse! For more info, call (608) 782-2494 or visit www.wiscorps.org.
Freaky Fact #2 The area just north of the La Crosse River, the Mobil Oil site, is believed to be haunted.
OCTOBER 16-18 COULEE REGION CHILL VS FAIRBANKS ICE DOGS 7 pm-9:30 pm @ Onalaska OmniCenter • Tickets: Adults - $10; students & children - $6.
EVENTS
OCTOBER 23 & 24 NORSKEDALEN’S GHOULEES IN THE COULEES 6 pm-9 pm @ Norskedalen Nature Center near Coon Valley • Haunted hikes through the coulees! Enjoy less-scary hikes from 6-7 pm and scarier hikes after that. It’s a half-mile hike through the haunted woods with other activities offered when you’ve finished the hike, including hot cider and fortunetelling. OCTOBER 24 BOO-SEUM HALLOWEEN PARTY 5:30 pm-7:30 pm @ La Crosse Children’s Museum • Tickets: $5-$10 per child • Join the La Crosse Children’s museum in celebrating Halloween in this non-scary party for children ages 2-7 years old. OCTOBER 25 ENCHANTED FOREST 2-6pm @ Hixon Forest. • Tickets $5/child; $1/adult; $20/max per family. • Trick or treat through Hixon Forest. Music by Hans Mayer, performance by The Magic of Isaiah, snacks, and more! Presented by Mayo Clinic Health System benefiting WisCorps. NOVEMBER 1 & 7 COULEE REGION CHILL VS AUSTIN BRUINS 7 pm-9:30 pm @ Onalaska OmniCenter • Tickets: Adults - $10; students & children - $6 NOVEMBER 8-9, 15-16 & 22-23 THE LION, THE WITCH, AND THE WARDROBE 11 am (2 pm on Sundays) @ Veterans Studio Theatre (Theatre G) • Tickets: TBA • Based on the renowned novel of the same title; watch Lucy, Edmund, Susan, and Peter’s Narnian adventures come to life on the stage!
LOCALLY LOCALLY OWNED, OWNED, LOCALLY LOCALLY ROASTED ROASTED FRESH FRESH COFFEE COFFEE
OCTOBER 16-19 WISCONSIN SCIENCE FESTIVAL All Day @ The Children’s Museum • Tickets: Free with museum admission • Four days filled with activities and fun for everyone! OCTOBER 17 NIGHTMARE ON KANE STREET 5:30 pm-8 pm @ La Crosse North Community Library • Tickets: Free • Come for a night of scares and fun! All ages welcome! OCTOBER 17 NIGHT (OUT) AT THE MUSEUM 5:30 pm-8 pm @ The Children’s Museum • Tickets: $11/member child; $16/non-member child • Parents get a night away from their kids, and kids (between 3 & 11) get a night away from their parents. The night includes stories, snacks and supervised museum exploration! OCTOBER 18 FAMILY FUN NIGHT 5 pm-8 pm @ YMCA-North (Onalaska) • Tickets: Members - free; non-member families - $10 • Join in for arts & crafts, games, swimming, open gym and other activities! OCTOBER 19 & 31 COULEE REGION CHILL VS WISCONSIN WHALERS 7 pm-9:30 pm @ Onalaska OmniCenter • Tickets: Adults - $10; students & children - $6 OCTOBER 23 SUGAR GLOW AWAY 5 pm-7 pm @ Myrick Park • Tickets: $6/person until Oct. 16; $8/person Oct. 17-22; $10/person day of event • Participate in outdoor games, a large group activity, and the 1K & 3K walks to help promote a healthy and active life!
KlutchChronicle.com \\ October, 2014
13
ENJOY OUR Every tuesday PUMPKIN SPICE STORY TIME LATTE SEASON WHILE IT LASTS 9:30-10:00 AM
ALWAYS WHEN Always $$11.50.50COFFEE coffee when YOU OWNmug MUG youBRING bring YOUR your own HomemadeFOOD food served HOMEMADE SERVED Breakfast and BREAKFAST ANDLunch LUNCH
1 1lb
$ off
of coffee beans
*limit of one per customer per visit
technology
t
The Cloud’s Illusions Clouds are wonderful! Those meteorological puffs of water and ice create a peripheral backdrop for a gorgeous sunny day, tickling the imagination while you lie flat on your back looking up at illusions created by the mind’s eye. Who hasn’t seen myriad images in clouds? It’s not a beautiful day if you don’t have clouds! Popularized in prose, poem and song, clouds have long been an icon for our way of describing the world around us, used metaphorically to describe dreamers (having your head in the clouds), optimism (clouds with a silver lining), or bad tidings (dark clouds on the horizon). Even love, from a decades-old song by Judy Collins called, “Both Sides Now,” is a metaphorical mixing of clouds, love and life. But in today’s technology-driven world, clouds have a new metaphor, and it’s arguably the first megatrend of the 21st century, well on its way to fundamentally changing our culture, called simply: The Cloud. The date The Cloud emerged is debatable, but the past 10 years have been its heyday as the technologies to proliferate computing power have reached a high level of advancement to support The Cloud’s ever-expanding scale. This, in turn, allowed MySpace, Facebook, Amazon, eBay and others to launch their culture-changing ventures. Not to mention Apple Computers and the entrepreneurial iPod, iPhone and iPad that opened the door for The Cloud to garner mass appeal (take a moment now to remember the genius of Steve Jobs). So what is The Cloud from a technical perspective? The Cloud, in its simplest definition, is the Internet. But to take it a bit further, it’s a centralized form of computing where the actual functions are performed somewhere else. In the “old days,” the central computer may have been your PC. Today it’s millions of computers scattered around the world that make up The Cloud. It’s estimated that Google alone has over 1 million computers in data centers throughout the globe. Amazon has websites set up in as many as 20 countries using just shy of a halfmillion computers worldwide. The Cloud is where we shop, socialize, date, search, watch videos, play games, get directions, and just about anything else you can imagine! So ya gotta love The Cloud, right? What could possibly be bad about a cloud, whether heavenly or metaphorical? But just like a virulent thunderstorm spawning a rampant sharknado, there is a dark side to The Cloud. Take social media as one example, where literally millions of people gather to “like,” “friend,” “tweet” and “post,” sharing a seemingly unending stream of personal information. All very utopian. But with this liking and tweeting and friending comes the converse, an Orwellian dystopia — the darkness in The Cloud. In short: Big brother is watching you. (Insert sinister laugh here.)
YOUR INNER WITHGEEK
like IT, get IT?!
IT...
By the way and totally by coincidence, George Orwell’s most famous novel, “1984,” is also the birth-year of Mark Zuckerberg, the co-founder of Facebook … but that’s just a fun fact! Facebook, Google, Twitter, and Amazon have all recently come under fire for how they gather, analyze and track their users, and then target advertising specifically toward each user based on their historical transactions, a process known as data mining. Tumblr, another social media site, announced in August that they would use special technologies to scan the 130 million photos posted per day (yes, per day!) and identify the product brands shown in the photos. For example, if someone is wearing a Tommy Hilfiger T-shirt or a pair of Nike Air Max running shoes in a photo, the information will be scanned, parsed, analyzed and sent to the manufacturer so the brands know how their products are being used (how will they know if you’re drinking Pepsi or Coke?). It’s amazing what The Cloud knows about you, and you probably aren’t even aware of it! Not to mention how the bad guys use The Cloud: identity theft, fraud, hacking, even stalking. But let’s not go there; there’s been enough of that in the news recently. So, is there a silver lining to this Cloud? It’s probably a trade-off between the value one places on being in The Cloud versus the negatives of having one’s information there. After much hue-and-cry, Cloud companies appear to be at least listening to their constituents, providing privacy policies and going public with how they collect and analyze data. Lawmakers are also threatening to get into the act, although we all know the degree to which Republicans and Democrats agree…on anything…including the color of clouds! But for now, the big data in The Cloud holds sway on the information we share. And once your information is in The Cloud, it is potentially there forever. So what should a person think? The Cloud is perfect! The Cloud is evil! To quote Judy Collins, “I’ve looked at Clouds from both sides now.” Regardless, The Cloud is a technical lexicon that won’t soon pass away. Some prognosticators are predicting The Cloud is with us forever, and given our current paradigm, those purveyors may indeed be correct. So while having your head … and your Facebook page … in the cloud may be a utopian place to be, like the song says, “it’s Cloud illusions I recall.” Maybe Judy Collins had it right all along… “I really don’t know Clouds at all.”
o
- Brian Boettcher
a t m i r o o n F s d u
Remember the good old days when you could just lie on your back and make shapes out of the clouds all day? And then you turned 6 and reality hit. Now, the last time you actually looked up at the sky was to wave your cellphone around in search of a signal on your way to work. This month at Klutch we challenge you to take a minute and look up at the original “cloud.” Check out the common cloud formations below for a little help identifying what kind of cloud the bunny rabbit shape you just found is made from (you’re welcome).
Cl
LETS TALK
ABOUT
connec
Stratus: These flat, fog-like clouds usually cover
the sky in sheets with their gray hue. Precipitation is not common, but don’t put it past them; they may pull the wool (or sheets) over your eyes and bring a light drizzle with them.
Cirrus:
Cirrus clouds are thin wispy clouds that form high in the sky and may remind you of your grandpa’s famous comb over. Cirrus usually indicates good weather ahead (pun intended).
Cumulus: These are the cotton balls of the sky. Normally represented in fairy tales, cumulus clouds have rounded towers on top and flat bottoms. “NeverEnding Story,” anyone?
Cumulonimbus:
The thunderstorm clouds. Formed from cumulus clouds, these bad boys are a result of the clouds continuing to grow vertically. Large amounts of energy are released from the condensation of water vapor within them, causing thunder and lightning.
The Oh S**t! Cloud:
This is actually not a cloud. If you are reading this right now and see one run! These are formed from cumulonimbus clouds and are hard to miss. You may have seen them in Twister, the 800 other movies entitled simply “Tornado,” or the ever popular “Sharknado.”
Fun Facts:
• Most clouds form in the troposphere (the lowest part of the Earth’s atmosphere) • There are many variations of these 3 main cloud types, including stratocumulus, altostratus, altocumulus, cirrostratus and cirrocumulus • A cloud is a large group of tiny water droplets that we can see in the air
speaking of technology, get on the interwebs and check out
www.klutchchronicle.com
14
October, 2014 // KlutchChronicle.com
What does a cloud wear under his raincoat? Thunderwear!
After you play some charades check out
APP REVIEW: CHARADES!
Something fun to do.
Article: Katie S
technology
A
s a kid, I loved playing charades with my family. What’s better than watching your sister make a complete fool of herself in hopes of nonverbally communicating with you (and then pretending you have no idea what she’s doing in an attempt to get her to do it longer)? As I found out during my college years, there is something better: watching a group of people making fools of themselves in hopes of nonverbally communicating with you. To create mass opportunities for your friends
www.klutchchronicle.com
guesses “getting married,” they flip the phone down to get a new phrase. Time’s up after 60 to 120 seconds, and points are revealed by the game. Because Charades! features several categories of phrases ranging from the tame “Fairy Tales” and “Disney Characters” to the wilder “Vegas, Baby!” and “Mixology” (which is a guess-the-cocktail category), this app is perfect for long road trips, family reunions, and even the weekend kegger. Download this app so the next time you’re bored with a few friends,
whether waiting in line on Black Friday or just taking a quick study break, you’ll have something fun to do.
to embarrass themselves, download FatChicken Studios’ Charades!, a free game that’s best described as Catch Phrase! for groups. Instead of having one actor and several guessers, however, in this game there is only one guesser and several actors, though you can play a “quick play” or in teams. The guesser holds the phone on their head with the screen facing the actors, and after selecting a
category, an action or phrase, let’s say, “getting married,” will come up on the phone’s screen. The actors then have to act or describe “getting married” to the guesser, all at once. When the guesser KlutchChronicle.com \\ October, 2014
15
Name: Charades! Price: Free Pros: • More than 45 free, actually fun categories installed • No Internet needed • Can change round settings: 60-120 second rounds • Quick play and team options • Can create a custom deck • Sister app for kids Cons: • Though all decks are free, you have to unlock categories with coins earned by completing rounds • Sometimes doesn’t pick up that the phone has been flipped • Drains battery
A&E print
Freaky Fact #3 The Bodega Brew Pub has been known to give chills as patrons have experienced taps on the shoulders and anonymous footsteps. The basement is also known to be haunted, where bricks and other stored materials have stacked themselves.
COMMUNITY SUBMISSIONS
share your talent! To submit your writing and art to Klutch Chronicle, visit www.klutchchronicle. com/writing-artsubmissions
Grail
Contemplations
Unshackled
BY: JESSE MICHAEL RENAUD
BY: BRIAN TRIPP
BY: ALLEYCE SOMERVILLE
A quiet falls over these hills like a shroud, here past the deep wood cuts and streams like veins; a lake of blood. Twilight eases into ink, and I wander in search of the Nine, and the Nine. Hung from my world tree with ash in the branches, ash in the sky. I was nearly all-powerful for a time. Still the haunt in my bones creaks for the waning cold and crackl-, that crisp of the moon; she blots out the stars with her autumnal glow and songs to the air concerning the far corners of earth; where things are kept hidden and vaulted, so removed that only hushed whispers tell that you were there once, beloved, at the foot of a great throne. You were made of gold and slept to the muted sound of crusaders making war. I did not know you then, though I was searching. And now I trace your routes on the map, tenderly like fingers across skin. Barely touching all those thousands of miles. All those years drenched in the rays of a healing sun. My grail realm-the hum of evening blankets ivory towers. Strength and honour have you; I keep to the low roads, quiet and insecure.
The sky was a dark grey, the color of freshly poured cement. The aroma of the static permeated the air, as if signaling that the super charged sky could split open at any time. The wind had died down about thirty minutes ago. A storm was definitely on its way. All around him leaves rained down, crimson as the sky on a summer night. Winter would be here soon. The chill in the air was proof enough of that.
The dust finally started settling and the ringing in my ears began to fade. I blinked, startled by the sudden light. Stunned, I gaze out of the hole, glimpsing what can only be described as freedom. For years, I only had this cell. I had forgotten the wind, the sensation of a gentle breeze caressing my cheek. I had forgotten how brightly the sun could shine down and how it could warm the flesh. The air was so clean, so clear. I strained against my chains, trying to pull myself closer to that world that existed beyond the cold stone walls of my dank cell. The sounds of a battle resounded outside, but I could not see far enough out of the hole in the wall of my tower, my prison.
A drop of water fell from the sky, landing on his cheek. Looking up at the sky, he surveyed the clouds. They were racing by, as if trying to escape the imminent storm. Why was he even out there? He couldn’t, for the life of him, remember. In fact, the more he thought about it, the less he remembered, even about himself. Who was he? Sure, he knew his name. He knew what he ate for breakfast that day, and remembered the faces of his friends, but how did any of that define who he was? As far as the universe was concerned, all he was was a bunch of cells: one organism who wasn’t even worth a fleck of dust in the grand scheme of things. Maybe that was why he’d made his way up to this hill. Maybe he had come out here to be washed away by the rain: to wipe his slate clean. Drops began to hit him more frequently. Yeah that sounded pretty feasible. The rain could wash away his doubts: wash away his insignificance. And when it stopped, perhaps he could start fresh: make a name for himself and prove to the universe that he was here for a reason. He would show everyone, himself included, that he was worthy of receiving the gift of life. The wind had picked up considerably since his inner tirade had begun. Leaves now danced around him in the heavy gusts. A loud crack reverberated through the sky, tearing open the clouds and unleashing a torrent of rain down upon the earth. He stood up, opening his arms wide, letting the ice-cold water engulf him. This was it! He could feel the rain, washing all of his doubts and insecurities away. After today, he would be a new man. The man he always wanted to be. He smiled for the first time in days, weeks, hell, probably for the first REAL time in months. With every drop of rain came a new surge of happiness and hope. Anticipation for the future literally made him shudder. A flash of lightning cut through the air, illuminating the onyx clouds. The man could feel the happiness burning through his body. In fact, he really felt warm, which was strange since the rain was so cold. He looked to the sky again. When had he gotten onto his back? He took one more breath, letting the refreshing air completely fill his lungs, before everything went black.
16
October, 2014 // KlutchChronicle.com
All I could do was watch the sky, watch as the dark clouds rolled in. The magnificence of nature that had been lost to me for all of these years left me in awe, a great swell of wonder and amazement filling my chest. It had been so long since I felt anything. The wind began to blow into my cell with a ferocity I had not experienced since my imprisonment. The rain began to fall, some finding its way into my tower to wet my face and hair. My hands and feet were chilled, but I didn’t care. My wrists were raw and bloody from where my manacles cut into my skin, but I ignored the pain, pulling myself as close as the iron restraints would allow. A flash of lightning and a crash of thunder covered up my laugh. Pure glee spread through me, a happiness I had not felt in years. My sky. My beautiful sky. Once again light danced across the sky, filling me with a sense of power I thought I would never again feel. I summoned all of my might and channeled it into one glorious cry that blended with the boom of thunder. Closing my eyes, I felt the sharp tingle of the electricity dance through my body as my cell filled with light and an earsplitting crash filled the dark space that had been my life for all these years. Standing on shaky legs, my chains fell to the stone floor with a clank. Electricity danced between my fingers and crackled in my dark hair, the static causing it to raise slightly. A great laugh bubbled its way out of my chest as I stepped through the debris and rubble to the window made by the machines of the battle down below. Effortlessly, I raised my self onto the uneven edge of stone, one hand against the side of the gap to steady me. I peered down below at the battle raging beneath my feet. They came for me.
A&E visual arts
COMMUNITY SUBMISSIONS
BY CATHRYN DAGENDESH notes
I have been an artist since I can remember, although I have many passions, art is my favorite. I really started developing my style in high school and since then it’s just taken off...it can be addicting. Although I use pastels, charcoal, water colors and spray paint, I mostly use pen and colored pencils for my medium.
Need more Klutch? ...of course you do! www.klutchchronicle.com and then even more.. on
BY SYLVIA NEUMANN KlutchChronicle.com \\ October, 2014
17
visual arts
ART RAGEOUS
With all of the incredible talent, incredible memories are made.
Article: Becca Dargatz
A&E
Art can be intimidating, but at the new art center, Art Rageous, there is no critiquing or judging - just a comfortable space with soft music in the background, lots of lighting, plenty of tables, and any art supply you could possibly desire. Owners Karen Bressi and Tina Hayes have made it their mission to take the mystery out of art so everyone may experience it. Bressi and Hayes have only known each other for three years, but they finish each other’s sentences like they have known
art, mixed media art, canvas painting classes, clay hand building and sculpture techniques, and clay pottery wheel classes. It does not matter what your experience or comfort level is with any project you want to do, because they have hand-picked a caring, knowledgeable staff to walk you through any project step by step. “The possibilities are endless,” says Bressi. “We just want to open their minds to the possibilities.” The art center is equipped to host birthday groups, nights out with friends, wedding showers, bachelorette parties, and corporate and family gatherings, but if flying solo is what you prefer, that is encouraged, too. In addition, Art Rageous will be hosting different monthly art workshops for the community. One of the most popular events for the art
“When they are here, we want people to relax, to have fun, and to zone out. You can drop the rest of the world and just create.”
how great it is to see everyone’s smiles when they are working on projects at the art center and how happy everyone is by the time they leave. “When they are here, we want people to relax, to have fun, and to zone out,” says Bressi. “You can drop the rest of the world and just create.” Art Rageous intends on staying ahead of the curve in providing new art trends for their customers. They want to continue to create a space so that everyone leaves happy, and most of all, the owners are grateful they get to do the thing they love and share it with everyone else. “We are so excited to get to know the community more and to let the community know we are here for them,” says Hayes. The art center is the perfect place for people of all ages and experience levels. If encouragement, compassion, and inspiration are what you are looking for, that is exactly what you will find at Art Rageous.
Art Rageous Located in Holmen Square Mall 500 N. Holmen Dr. #504 Holmen, Wis. Phone: 608-526-8787 Website: www.artrageousac.com Facebook: Art - Rageous Art Centers Hours: Tues - Thurs: 11 a.m. - 8 p.m. Fri: 11 a.m. - 9 p.m. Sat: 10 a.m. - 9 p.m. Sun: 11 p.m. - 5 p.m.
center has been the Sip and Paint Canvas Painting Class. The center features many different paintings, and for $30 a person you receive professional guidance, and you take home a canvas filled with beautiful, unique art you can be proud of. It is BYOB, so all you have to do is pick your painting, make your reservations, and show up ready to create (and drink wine). In the short time Art Rageous has been open, the owners have already witnessed the impact the art center has had on the community. Many people have stopped in and expressed their excitement and gratitude for having such a great space in Holmen. Both of the owners commented on
18
October, 2014 // KlutchChronicle.com
Photo Credit:
Bob Good
14. in the Park 20 nnection for just ot from Pride Co sh Q p BT ou LG gr r e ve th Ri n Attached is rector of the 7 flag for possible publicatio di e iv ut ec ex w n, bo ze in nt ra Ja a! g n er bi so m e ck th ca I had asked Ja or a few people in front of quickly got in front of the le t 20 people ou a happy coup Ab . cle ni ro in the Klutch Ch
Around
ity!
mun the com
Pssst...
each other for so much longer. Less than six months ago they decided they wanted to open an art center that would appeal to everyone, and that is exactly what they did. They found a space in Holmen so they could reach out to a family-oriented community that is lacking entertainment. This is the third art establishment for Bressi, and the first for Hayes, but they both share the same passion to make art accessible for everyone. What sets Art Rageous apart from other studios is that there is something different for everyone in your family or your group of friends to do. The art center offers paintyour-own pottery, fused glass, mosaic
www.klutchchronicle.com
Karen Bressi
DIY EX
SIVE U L C
F
FREE DIY EVEN
FLORAL DESIGN WITH S BY GUENTHERS R E W O L
IT ISN’T THAT HARD, RIGHT?
How to Carve a pumpkin Like a Master... … or Close to it
T!
By Jenn Bushman How do you carve an awesome pumpkin? It’s not too hard, but it takes patience. In this step-by-step I talk about how to carve a realisticlooking jack-o’-lantern. It may not look like much in the light, but put in a candle and turn out the lights and you’ll see the pumpkin come to life! First, you need to find the perfect pumpkin for you. For me, it depends on my mood and what I want to carve, but I usually go with a pumpkin that has a flat front, which will help carving. A gnarly looking pumpkin, on the other hand, can add drama to your final product.
Come for a night of fun and leave with your own beautiful bouquet! This exclusive DIY floral design event is instructor led and open to all ages! Bring your friends and support a great cause!
Thursday, October 23rd
3 - 1 hour sessions offered from 5-8 PM Call 608-783-2140
or register at www.flowersbyguenthers.com Limited space is available! Deadline is October 16th.
Donations are encouraged and all proceeds benefit the Carilee Fund at the Gundersen Medical Foundation.
If you or someone you know has further questions about domestic abuse or sexual assault, contact Gundersen’s 24-Hour Crisis Line: (608) 775-5950 or (800) 362-9567, ext. 55950
The Tools Most people use the pumpkin carving kits you get at the store, but my favorite tools are less likely items. For cutting off the tops and bottoms, a saw from a carving kit does the trick. To scoop the guts, my favorite tool is a metal tablespoon I got from my grandma. As for the actual carving of the image, I use an X-Acto knife with various tips and a small wood carving chisel or a flat X-Acto tip. Last, you’ll need a sharp awl or plastic poker to help with your guidelines. Cut a Hole in the Pumpkin Using a carving saw, cut a hole in either the bottom or top of the pumpkin, whichever you prefer. If you’ll be using a candle for illumination, you can cut the hole in the pumpkin’s top or back as an air hole. I prefer battery-operated candles to avoid any pumpkin roasts. Next, the fun part! Scoop out the guts, pulp and seeds. Separate out the seeds, then wash and dry them to plant next year, or throw them in the oven for a yummy snack. Choosing, Transferring & Carving Your Image Many people aren’t confident about drawing the image they want on the pumpkin, so an easy way around this is to find an image you’d like to use, let’s say Frankenstein, and print off a guide. If you have an image editor on your computer, change the image to black and white and bump up the contrast just a little. Then print the image at the appropriate size for your pumpkin. To transfer your design, first cut the corners to help with the curves of the pumpkin and tape your image onto it. Poke holes in a line that traces the border of all the white spaces, but don’t go too close to the dark areas. These dots are guidelines for later. Once you have all the dots done for the white areas, remove the template. Next is the most time-consuming part of the process, so be patient! Use the X-Acto knife to lightly and gently cut along the outside of the poked line designating your white areas. Make sure not to cut through the rind. Once your lines are cut, use your chisel or flat carving tool to pull up the skin and a little rind (removing the poked line) for all the white areas of the image. Once this is done, you can take your pumpkin into a dark room to check your progress. To brighten areas, scrape them a bit deeper. Scraping from the inside will brighten the whole image, but be careful not to scrape too much and break through the rind. How to Light Your Pumpkin To light your jack-o’-lantern, place candles, small flashlights or batteryoperated lights inside. One light may not be enough; I use three or four. You can even use a short string of Christmas lights wrapped around a mason jar and secured with tape. And just like that, you are a pumpkin carving master!
For more images of this process and other carvings I’ve done, check out my website: www.jennbushman.com/p/pumpkin-carvings.html KlutchChronicle.com \\ October, 2014
19
With all of the incredible talent, incredible memories are made.
B
efore radio, television and movies, entertainment was live. Today, with all of the advances in technology and our busy culture, Michael Scott, founder of the Old School Variety Show, hopes to bring live entertainment back into the mainstream. Scott has been involved with storytelling for years, but after attending storytelling festivals and events, he wanted another venue for storytellers to perform at. “I wanted a show that featured storytellers, but did not have storytellers in the title so people would actually show up,” says Scott. All jokes aside, the variety show people see today not only features storytellers, but also musicians, actors and actresses, magicians, puppeteers, dancers, comedians, and the list goes on. Each show is different and provides viewers with a completely unique experience.
The blend of performers came after Scott realized that some of his best memories involved gathering friends for an evening of drinking wine and sharing stories and talents. The Old School Variety Show recreates the experience of family and friends gathering in a parlor on a Saturday night for live entertainment, something that is hard to recreate on the big screen. One night, Scott found himself playing cards with friend and local musician in town, Mike Caucutt. They started talking about the times before radio, television and movies. Historically, after dinner, families and friends would go into the parlor and someone would play the piano, someone might recite Shakespeare, and someone might sing a song (a little bit different than today’s post-dinner activities). Scott wanted to recreate that format and showcase a mix of music, theater, comedy and storytelling.
So, after a soft opening in 2006, the Old School Variety Show began periodically hosting shows in 2007. Over the years, the number of acts and the interest in the show has increased immensely. For the upcoming 20142015 season, there will be one show a month from September to May. Previously, The Grand Hotel Ballroom in historic downtown La Crosse hosted all of the Variety Show’s performances. However, because the ballroom is not handicap accessible, and because the show has been a resounding success, Scott has located other, larger venues for this season’s performances. While the show will move around this season, from The Grand Hotel Ballroom to the Cavalier Lounge, the Pump House, or Hieder Center, the talented performances will remain consistent. Time and time again, Scott is incredibly impressed with the amazing amount of talent in the La Crosse area. With high caliber theatre departments at the University of Wisconsin – La Crosse and Viterbo, the variety show is a great place to highlight local talent. “La Crosse is the AAA farm club for Broadway,” says Scott. With all of the incredible talent, incredible memories are made. There are many performances that stick out to Scott, but he is always pleased that performers feel comfortable enough to share emotionally stirring experiences with an audience full of strangers. The audiences for the variety shows also impress Scott, sometimes just as much as the performers. He claims that the people who come to the shows are the best listeners. “It shocks the musicians sometimes, how well the people are listening,” says Scott. “There are lots of places in town that host
musicians, but it is usually in addition to whatever else is going on, like at a restaurant.” Scott has created a space for people to witness the talent in town, and the best compliment he has ever received from an audience member was how Scott made them so proud of their town. Moving forward, Scott wants to keep the performances live. There are no plans to have a radio show or record the performances.
“There is something special about a live performance,” says Scott. “There is one time to do the performance and then it just lives in people’s memories.” The new season for the Old School Variety Show began Saturday, Sept. 20. Check out a show this season to support the superb local talent and to catch an original monologue by Scott, including a Garrison Keillor news report impression. Tickets are $15 and can be purchased at The People’s Food Co-op and McCaffrey’s Coffee across from UW-L.
Weber Center
www.oldschoolvarietyshow.com and www.facebook.com/OldSchoolVarietyShow
for the
Performing Arts
Where the arts come alive! Photo by Theresa M. Smerud
OLD SCHOOL VARIETY SHOW
Article: Becca Dargatz
A&E showtime
Discounts available for students!
webercenterfortheperformingarts.org 428 Front Street South, La Crosse, WI 54601
608-784-9292
20
October, 2014 // KlutchChronicle.com
A&E
showtime
MOVIE RATINGS rottentomatoes.com vs rogerebert.com The Identical As Above, So Below Cantinflas Calvary The November Man
HEALTH INFORMATION AT YOUR FINGERTIPS
If I Stay When The Game Stands Tall Sin City: A Dame To Kill For Sharknado 2: The Second One NA The Giver
Visit MYCARE.GUNDERSENHEALTH.ORG to
COMING SOON Battle of the Strands Live
Special Features
Unfair: IRS
Harry Potter
Rifftrax Live: Anaconda
Harry Potter Series starts 10/1.
Metropolitan Opera Live Season Begins
One show in the series each Wednesday at 7pm through 11/19 with free popcorn to rewards members.
Gone Girl Alexander And The No Good Very Bad Day
results and talk to your ule appointments, check your lab Would you like to be able to sched e? If you’re a patient at devic held hand or uter own comp medical provider all right from your e, online medical tool. secur our re MyCa for Simply sign up Gundersen Health System, you can. • View lists of your allergies, medicines MyCare allows you to: and immunizations rgent • Contact your provider with non-u • Order more contact lenses sts reque or y questions • View accounts of your children, famil • View your health summary bers and other who give their mem • View lab results permission nts • Schedule and view future appointme
sign up.
Gundersen Lutheran Medical Center, Inc. | Gundersen Clinic, Ltd.
Flick or Treat Flick or Treat Series, Fri-Sun each weekend in October. 10am, $2 One show each week.
2032 Ward Avenue La Crosse, WI 54601 (608) 791-1999
Monster House, Casper, Curse of the Were-Rabbit and Hotel Transylvania
Photo Credit: Bob Good
Waking Sun Trueman of La Crosse’s Bryan Fleming and Mark /13/14. 09 ht, se Saturday nig returned to The Warehou
mmunity! Around the co
MARCUS LA CROSSE CINEMA 2032 WARD AVENUE LA CROSSE, WI 54601 (608) 791-1999 KlutchChronicle.com \\ October, 2014
21
A&E
showtime THE
ood
dit: Bob G
Photo Cre
t the e season a em th f o t u o b yh al Valley Ma r their fin rms up fo Crosse’s Mississippi a w m e h y a l score: La i Valley M olls 49. Mississipp r in Onalaska. Fina Center’s Missfit D d te lan Omni Cen 322 - Rich
!
unity
omm the c d n u ro
A
PLAY IS THE THING
“Would you be interested in being the local theatre columnist for our new arts and entertainment publication, Klutch?” asked Casey Kulinski, editor of Klutch. There was a brief awkward pause because I answered, “Yes, definitely!” before she even finished her sentence. This is the bully pulpit I’ve been searching for. I’ve been producing a variety show that highlights musicians, storytellers, actors and other performing artists. Some of my favorite parts of the show are the classical and contemporary monologues performed by local actors. The depth of talent in town, I have discovered, is jaw dropping. There are many reasons for this. First, we have two universities with theatre departments that are firing on all cylinders. The caliber of the students being recruited to these programs grows substantially with every passing year. Viterbo University provides a conservatorystyle training program that trains students for a career in theatre. In addition, UW-La Crosse teaches students general theatre studies, design/technical, performance, music theatre, stage management and arts administration. Audiences at both universities’ productions are truly getting an early glimpse of careers that will shape Broadway and theatre everywhere in the future. Second, we are lucky to have no shortage of performance space. The Cavalier has welcomed back live theatre after La Crosse Community Theatre left the 5th Avenue location, and the Pump House offers space to directors, actors, storytellers and designers. The Muse on the north side also welcomes these artists. The new jewel along the river, Weber Center, houses La Crosse Community Theatre, which continues its stellar tradition of great theatre. Let’s widen the circle. We have the Great River Shakespeare Theatre in Winona, the Commonweal Theatre in Lanesboro, and performing art centers in La Crescent and West Salem. From this bully pulpit I will make a strong case. Our region has one of the most exciting, diverse and thriving theatre communities in the Midwest. Now, let’s get down to business. Opening the day before Halloween, which couldn’t be more fitting, the Pump House presents Irish playwrights Martin McDonagh’s pitch-black comedy, “The Pillowman.” Several years ago I saw only one scene from this play during an actor’s senior acting recital at UW-La Crosse. The scene couldn’t have lasted longer than eight minutes, but that was enough to haunt me for nearly a week. I discovered afterward this was the work of an Irish playwright, which made perfect sense to me. I am a student of spooky folklore from around the globe, and nobody, and I mean nobody, does it better than the Irish. It’s darn near inappropriate. Irish ghost and horror stories mess with you psychologically and creep down to the marrow. There is no doubt Martin McDonagh pulled from this tradition when he penned “The Pillowman.” “The Pillowman” is a bold and powerful piece of theatre. It received the Olivier and the Evening Standard Award for Best New Play, as well as the New York Drama Critics’ Circle Award for Best New Foreign Play in 2004. It is a play of storytellers. Katurian, a writer of short stories that often depict violence against children, has been arrested by two detectives, Ariel and Tupolski, because some of his stories resemble recent child murders. When he hears that his brother Michal has confessed to the murders and implicated Katurian, he resigns himself to his execution but attempts to save his stories from destruction. The play includes both narrations and reenactments of several of Katurian’s stories, most notably the autobiographical “The Writer and the Writer’s Brother,” which tells how Katurian developed his disturbed imagination by hearing the sounds of Michal being tortured by their parents. Sound like a lot of laughs? Believe it or not, they are there. Which only heightens the creep level and will have you wondering, “Is there something inherently wrong with me?” This is a perfect play for the Halloween season and the Pump House is the ideal space. The intimacy of the theatre puts audiences deliciously close to characters they wish only to get away from. The gruesome violence is stylized but it is still violent. “The Pillowman” is a horror tale for grown-ups. It is a creep story that uses all the faculties of theatre and goes far beyond a flashlight under the chin. This is your bold, exciting and slightly controversial Halloween treat this year and should not be missed. - Michael Scott Michael Scott is an actor, writer, storyteller and passionate advocate for local performing artists.
Check out klutchchronicle.com for more stuff! 22
October, 2014 // KlutchChronicle.com
The Pillowman Directed by Ryan Soberg Oct. 30-31, Nov. 1, 6-8 7:30 p.m. thepumphouse.org for tickets
ECOFRIENDLY ARTISTS Cloud Cult’s mission to preserve the environment.
Article: Alyssa Schulte
A&E tunes W
hen the phrase “going green” was little more than a whisper, there were those who were already busy spearheading a movement to better the environment and the earth … some even commencing this mission in an area of popular culture you might not expect: the music industry. Two such environmentalists are Craig and Connie Minowa, members of popular band Cloud Cult (lead singer and onstage painter, respectively), who formed Earthology Institute (a nonprofit environmental organization based out of Viroqua, Wis.) in 1999. Many of the Earthology Institute’s projects have focused on what you’d
Freaky Fact #4 Don’t forget the Mothman. A large humanoid creature with wings and bright red eyes is believed to be making its home in the Upper Mississippi Wildlife Refuge.
It just becomes easy to say we can make a better, more humane, more sustainable choice. We just hope others will do the same.” The record label truly embodies one of the institute’s core beliefs, of bettering the environment while using, in Connie’s words, “creativity and beauty in the process.” The band’s environmental mission has, thus far, been well received. They’re hoping that other musical groups will see their success, the positive difference they’re making, and how well fans seem to appreciate these efforts, and follow suit. Connie and the rest of the musical outfit are very appreciative of their fans’ support, both of their music and their environmental activism: “We sincerely hope that our fans and critics respect and support that, and understand why we do what we do.” Another big, exciting project currently in the works over at the institute is Earthology Park, a beautiful 5-acre public space that will consist of trails, gardens, art installations, meditation sites and picnic areas. Located just a couple of miles from downtown Viroqua and nestled along the Kickapoo River, the land will
“It just becomes easy to say we can make a better, more humane, more sustainable choice. We just hope others will do the same.” Connie Minowa probably expect: sustainable living, organic farming, reducing the use of pesticides, etc. Where they truly differ from other organizations with similar goals, however, and what really makes them so interesting, is their focus on utilizing music, the arts, and education to further promote their green ideologies. Since their founding, they have successfully completed more than two dozen grant projects (not too shabby), and they’re only looking to expand. One unique branch of this organization is Earthology Records, the band’s own completely eco-friendly label. According to Cloud Cult’s website, the label “would become the homegrown powerhouse where all of the band’s booking, publicity, CD replication, T-shirt production, and recording would take place.” In other words, they’ve got it covered. It’s abundantly clear just how important the environment is to the group, and they don’t take this responsibility lightly. When I asked Connie Minowa, who, as mentioned previously, is also one of the performing painters in the band, why she felt it was so important for the music industry to go green, she answered with a simple and passionate, “Because we can.” She went on to add, “We have so many resources and tools available. Why not? If we can make a choice to use organic cotton tees instead of nonorganic cotton, shouldn’t we do that? …
serve multiple purposes, both practical and whimsical. Several selfless goals include utilizing their vegetable plots to fill the pantries of local food shelves; adding a small, free on-site library; and offering gardens of herbs and flowers (donated by members of the community) for the public to enjoy. In the months and years to come, the land - which the institute snagged in 2011 through donations, grants and other support - will be adding longer trails, campsites, cabins, and, if the passion of those involved is any indication, probably
much, much more. These goals will be realized much quicker with the continuing support of the public, whether that comes through private donations (which are tax deductible and can be made through their website) or members of the community volunteering their time weeding, planting and working at the park. “It’s definitely a process,” Connie says, “And we could
always use volunteers to help create and maintain this sweet little park.” A seed of an idea that took root in the late 1990s is now evolving, faster and faster, into a truly remarkable force to be reckoned with, one planted tree - or maybe one record - at a time.
For more information on the institute and what they’ve been up to lately, or if you’re interested in getting your hands a little dirty and helping out at Earthology Park, visit the institute’s website at www.earthologyinstitute.org or the park’s Facebook page at www.facebook.com/ EarthologyPark. You should probably crank some Cloud Cult while you’re at it, too; it’s only right.
KlutchChronicle.com \\ October, 2014
23
A&E
Freaky Fact #5 Piggy’s/Wine Guyz is haunted by a man that had a horrific accident at the foundry at that location.
tunes
“THAT GUITAR SHOW”
SETS ITS SIGHTS ON REGULAR SERIES.
L
eRoy Lemke has a story about falling in love with guitars, and here’s how it goes: When he was a kid, he used to watch “Hee Haw” with his parents. Every time a guitar came on, he perked up. He perked up again when he became a huge fan of the rock band “Kiss.” They’re no strangers to heavy-duty guitar playing. He used to have fun jamming with his friends, and then he got serious about the instrument he loved so much as a teenager. Eventually, he played in a couple of bands around the La Crosse area.
Shop, would serve as the backdrop for folks to share their own stories about how much they love guitars? And that was that. An idea was born: a show for guitar players by guitar players — about the guitars, the people, the stories. It’s one Lemke is determined to see become a reality, and the newly-christened “That Guitar Show” is just about set to go. Since shortly before Easter, when Lemke hatched the idea, he’s been working to bring “That Guitar Show” to the airwaves (just which airwaves are yet to be determined). He wants to pitch the idea to several networks, as well as popular streaming
The idea is to travel all around the country letting people “from superstars to super collectors” share their guitar stories with the viewing audience.
Noel, at Dave’s Guitar Shop. “I just had to be around the culture,” Pangburn said. Although a thumb accident at a factory job left him unable to play for almost two years, it didn’t alter his love for the instrument; in fact, during that time Pangburn took up roadie and repair work for Lemke’s band. “If I couldn’t play it, I was going to learn as much as I could about it,” he said. Knowing Lemke personally made Pangburn’s involvement in “That Guitar Show” that much easier to say yes to. And having Rogers’ encouragement was important on a personal level. “Dave’s given me a lot in my life,” Pangburn said. It takes the hard work and dedication of
LeRoy Lemke
His fascination with and love of guitars continued to grow, and he started hanging around the internationally-famous Dave’s Guitar Shop in La Crosse. It was the atmosphere of collectible guitars, some worth upward of $600,000, and a group of people who loved the instrument just as much as he did that attracted him most, but he also noticed everyone had a different reason, a different history, a different story about their ties to the guitar. Then, one day, he felt that old tug once again. “Every time I turned on a reality show, and a guitar came on, I’d perk up,” Lemke said. “I thought, ‘I can’t be the only one.’”
So, he started thinking something else. What if he could create a reality show of his own, one in which big-name guitarists from the industry, along with famous guitar factories and stores like Dave’s Guitar
services like Netflix and Amazon. But first, he needed a pilot. And for that, he needed funding. So, he called upon Dave Rogers, a longtime friend and owner of Dave’s Guitar Shop, to allow him to come in during three days in June and shoot some “data footage.” The results were good. “What we saw, we liked,” Lemke said. “It evolved.” A Facebook page, with a call out for talent (asking if folks would send in their own footage and stories detailing their love of guitars) got more than 8,000 “likes” in 90 days. He got Eddie Trunk, a famous voice-over artist in the industry, to record narration for them. “I’m trying to get some pretty big names, I don’t want to say who just yet, to come along with us,” Lemke said. The idea is to travel all around the country letting people “from superstars to super collectors” share their guitar stories with the viewing audience. The show is now the focus of a Kickstarter campaign, which aims to raise $50,000 and produce a top-quality pilot episode which will be used to pitch to networks and hopefully lead to 12- to18-episode seasons. “We’re not going to have a large cast of regular characters,” said producer Kenneth Pangburn. “It should be about guitars.” Pangburn is a guitar lover himself. In fact, he met his wife of 27 years, Bridgitt
24
October, 2014 // KlutchChronicle.com
many people to turn an idea for a show into reality. In addition to Pangburn, Lemke has enlisted the talents of Jonathan Forstot, writer and producer, and Jim Gaustad, music producer, for the show. Rogers, who’s made a career with his world-famous shop (which frequently graces the covers of the industry’s most elite guitar magazines), said he loves what the guys are doing. “I love the guitar in all shapes and sizes,” Rogers said, “and I want to support them in any way I can. I welcome them any time.” For Lemke, it’s both the continuation of a lifetime love, and the start of something new. “We’re really on the cusp of big things happening,” Lemke said.
food & drink
y
satisf
TASTE YOURBUDS
battleOf The
BLOODIES
It was a fine evening for strolling downtown, loud laughter, and bloody marys as my drinking buddies (you might remember these fools from last month’s beer review) and I trekked from bar to bar (my job is really hard) in search of an answer to that almostunknowable question: Who really serves the best bloody mary in town?
(otherwise known as the “What happened last night?” bloody) Fayze’s, a charming downtown eatery famous for their amazing Talame™ bread, scored the highest for our Best Breakfast Bloody. With a lovely blend of spices and a great consistency, plus garnished with a pickle, olive, pepperoni and pepper jack cheese, it was the kind of perfect-for-brunch drink that really clears your head. They also received high marks for their excellent, prompt service. Our bartender, Katie, was warm, friendly and knowledgeable. (By the way, her favorite is the Firecracker bloody mary, so make sure you stop in and bug her.)
BEST “MEAL IN A GLASS” BLOODY (as in the, “gee whiz, that was so filling I don’t even need to order cheese curds … but of course, I will” bloody)
Del’s Bar excelled in our Best “Meal in a Glass” Bloody category. With a hearty, clean taste that leaves the good kind of grit in your teeth and a bit of spice on your tongue, you’re sure to find yourself nodding along when people exclaim that Del’s is the prime example of what a bloody mary should be. Upon visiting this popular watering hole, it’s rare to find an empty bar stool; their renowned bloody marys, as well as their reputation for a friendly, inviting atmosphere, keeps the place pulsing with energy.
With all of this in mind, three out of five of my cohorts exuberantly named Del’s Bar the triumphant winner, while the rest of us heehawed between all three. Each bar shined for different reasons, after all, and each one is worthy of keeping your bar tab open for a while.
roasting
s d e e s e h t
Trick or treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat! Alright, alright! We heard you here at Klutch. Here is a little treat for your Halloween festivities this year. What is one of the best parts of pumpkin carving? Roasting the seeds! Why not add a little twist this year?
In lieu of ranking these fine establishments on a tedious 1-3 scale, I narrowed it down to who truly shines in these ridiculous, but super important categories:
MOST CREATIVE BLOODY
(or the “Praise the Lord for bacon-flavored vodka!” bloody) Last, but certainly not least when it comes to creativity and atmosphere, is the lovely Dublin Square. They won, hands down, in the Most Creative Bloody arena. They offered a wide variety of different flavors, so, in the name of science … we pretty much ordered one of each. The resounding favorite was the Cilantro bloody, although the Sriracha was close behind. A nice citrus aftertaste (provided, no doubt, by either the lime or lemon that topped each drink) accompanied each sip. Varying in degrees of spiciness, each bloody was refreshing and well blended. Dublin also boasts a quaint outdoor seating area, expansive menu of delectable drinks and entrees, and friendly wait staff, which, when thrown all together, creates a very pleasant experience. Also, way off topic, but their Guinness Shandy (refreshing lemonade-Guinness hybrid) was excellent.
So, who makes the best bloody mary in town? The world La Crosse may never know.
Try this Sweet and Spicy Pumpkin Seed snack. What you will need: • 2 cups of rinsed and dried pumpkin seeds • 2 tablespoons of melted butter • 1 teaspoon of salt • 1 tablespoon of Worcestershire sauce • 1 tablespoon of brown sugar • 2 drops of hot pepper sauce For this recipe preheat the oven to 300°F and line a baking pan with aluminum foil. Mix together the seeds and the butter, and then add the salt, Worcestershire sauce,
BONUS
BEST BREAKFAST BLOODY
We visited three local favorites in our mission to track down the truth: Del’s Bar, Fayze’s Restaurant & Bakery, and Dublin Square. And in this noble quest, we came armed with only one weapon: a thirst for knowledge. Well, that, and booze.
DIY
brown sugar and hot sauce. Spread the seeds over the pan and place in the oven for 45 minutes, again stirring the seeds until golden brown or crispy. This is just one suggestion as to what you can do with your pumpkin seeds besides just throwing them away. If you aren’t digging this sweet and spicy combo, don’t worry; there are tons of other recipes that can be found online and are just a click away. Happy Halloween! And happy snacking! Happy DIY, my friends! Source: about.com
KlutchChronicle.com \\ October, 2014
25
JUST BECAUSE
Do you have a DIY you would like to share or see in future issues? Send your DIY to
casey@muellermediacorp.com mmm...tasty www.klutchchronicle.com get a second round on
health & fitness
For more Freaky Facts join this year’s Dark Tours! For dates and times check out the calendar on pg. 29
CRANK THE HEAT Hot Yoga Thrives in the Community.
A
Article: Sara Heaser
ss wellne MIND, BODY
mericans love fads, and exercise is no exception. Suzanne Somers and her ThighMaster are images from my childhood, and today, the slightly terrifying P90X guy is on heavy infomercial rotation. There’s also Tae Bo, that Bowflex machine thingy, those Wii Fit video games, Pilates, and the more recently popular CrossFit and SoulCycle. Other ways of sweating, like running, biking and hiking, are a bit simpler - little equipment is needed besides our bodies. I like to think hot yoga belongs in this category, too. Perhaps that’s why yoga is not a new concept; a simple Google search reveals grainy, black and white YouTube videos of BKS Iyengar, who is credited with
popularizing yoga in the Western world. But as of late, fitness gurus in the La Crosse area have discovered this “new” way to sweat. Yoga requires focus, discipline and an open mind - a willingness to attempt contortions that seem reserved for Cirque du Soleil artists. It also requires confidence. Thin clothing (bonus points for spandex!), tight quarters, and leering eyes are enough to thwart some from entering a studio. Add heat and humidity and it’s no wonder the back rows fill up first. Skin gets slippery and breathing gets heavy. There’s a certain grace to mopping the sweat off one’s face without crossing the line - that invisible barrier between yoga mats is as small as 6 inches sometimes. No matter the pose, there should be no skin-to-skin contact, exchange of sweat, or stolen glances. However, despite the less-than-pleasant circumstances, some people return to their yoga mats again and again in a virtual sauna. What makes hot yoga so popular? Stephanie Helmers, owner of Zen and Pow Studio in Holmen, says her clients “crave the sweat.” To those who are used to intense cardio workouts like long-distance running or biking, cranking up the thermostat “adds another element to an otherwise relaxing and refreshing workout,” Helmers says. “Hot yoga feels like a more intense experience. Cardio lovers leave my studio feeling like they just got done with a run - sweaty and tired. It’s a nice complement to my MMA workouts. The heat loosens up muscles; stretching poses benefit nearly every other type of exercise. I’m all about balance.” And according to Mandy Roush, founder of Root Down Yoga Studio on La Crosse’s north side, yoga provides balance in other ways. Yoga is popular because of “the fast-paced society we live in and our need for refuge and quiet. Yoga can provide a short one-hour vacation from the chaos outside. I think the structure of a yoga class gives us ‘permission’
FOR &SOLE
to take that time that we may not otherwise take on our own. At Root Down, we focus on linking movement with breathing, and often, the breaths taken in a yoga class are the only deep ones of the day.” And why hot yoga in La Crosse? Why the popularity in our community? I’m convinced some credit goes to our frigid winters. Once the subzero temperatures settle in, it takes some creativity and commitment to stay active. There’s only so many times I can hit play on my Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred DVD; it’s fun in November, but torture come March. And just like cozying up to a cup of hot cocoa on frigid afternoons is a treat, so is a long stretch in a steamy room. Roush and Helmers both attest it’s our community’s love for an active lifestyle that has spurred hot yoga’s rise in popularity. Helmers adds, “This is an incredibly active community. To put it simply, people love to sweat.” Our landscape is, well, the land of opportunity: Bluffs, rolling hills, the Mississippi, and lots of green space in the city contribute to our reputation as a health-conscious community. Our scenery is unique, and so is hot yoga. “It’s something different, a more specialized style of yoga that yet, is still low-impact,” Helmers says. Hot yoga is a rare find: “It’s both a great workout for beginners and for those who are more fit and looking for opportunities to cross-train.” Roush confirms the versatility of hot yoga could be a draw for many: “People are looking for innovative ways to move their bodies in ways that feel good and are good for them. Also, yoga, and the Root Down Yoga Studio, are accessible to everyone regardless of age, ability or experience.” Although it takes a heat-controlled room to benefit from hot yoga - Roush describes the sweat as “deep” and “detoxifying” - many are introduced to the practice in other ways. There’s a lot of yoga happening outside of the studio, right here in our streets and
parks. Free yoga classes led by Tammy Z, The Yoga Place and Root Down Yoga Studio were featured at the Cameron Park farmers market this summer; an adaptive yoga class designed for those with disabilities is offered at the Black River Beach Neighborhood Center this fall; and for Historic Downtown Day on Oct. 11, a free yoga demonstration will be sponsored by The Yoga Place. The many free and low-cost opportunities to try yoga are yet another testament to La Crosse’s health-centric, relaxed culture. Roush describes her studio as “more than just a yoga studio. All humans crave real and meaningful connection with people, and Root Down is a community where we empower each other to move our bodies, explore our minds, and connect with our true nature.” If you’re up for, as Roush puts it, “discovering what is possible on your yoga mat and shining light on new possibilities elsewhere in your life,” the hot yoga community is ready to share the experience. Be sure to take an open mind and the biggest water bottle you can find.
Photo Credit: © Hatlem Photography
Easy yoga positions to try - In case you feel like getting your Zen on in the comfort of your own home Mountain Pose Stand up straight with your legs comfortably apart and weight evenly distributed on both legs. While breathing deeply and slowly and with your arms at your sides, move your arms up as if you are reaching to the sky or making a snow angel. From there, you may choose to bring down your arms into a prayer stance, resting hands in front of your chest and holding the pose for several deep breaths. This pose is great to make you more conscious of your breathing and to improve posture.
Tree Pose Tree pose is a more difficult mountain pose. To do this pose, get into mountain pose and lift your left leg up, hinging at the knee and connecting your left foot to your inner right thigh. You may want to use your hands to get your foot in place, but then return them in front of your chest as if you were praying after you’re sure you won’t fall down. Take a few deep breaths in and out, and then switch legs. Tree pose is great for strengthening your balance and monitoring your breathing.
Upward Dog When doing this pose, you may look like a human seal. Start by laying face-down on the floor, and tuck your arms under your body, with the palms of your hands on the ground and your thumbs aligned under your shoulders. Push yourself up on your hands until your arms have straightened, and allow your neck to swivel up as if you are looking at the sun. Make sure you’re not hunching your back, but keeping it straight or pushing it out a bit. Your feet should be on the ground and your toes pointed out, with the bottoms of your feet facing up. Close your eyes and take a few slow, deep breaths in and out. Upward dog is a good pose for strengthening and stretching your spine and arms.
26
October, 2014 // KlutchChronicle.com
Child’s Pose Sit upright on your heels, and then stretch your arms and body straight out on the ground in front of you, as if you are bowing. Keep the tops of your feet on the ground, pointed out. Your face will be on the floor in front of your knee caps, and your torso will be resting on your thighs. This is a very relaxing pose and relieves neck and back pain.
Corpse Pose A favorite of the Klutch staff, this pose involves laying face-up on the floor with your arms and legs stretched out about 45 degrees apart while slowly breathing and keeping your eyes shut … and that’s it. This pose is about relaxation, and is great when you need a five-or-so minute nap. Downward Dog In this pose, you basically look like an upside-down V. Start on all fours and then walk your hands out in front of you, bending your hips forward and keeping your back at the same angle as your arms. Your heels will probably lift off the ground, leaving you on the balls of your feet, but you will get a better stretch if you leave your feet on the ground. Take a few slow, deep breaths in and out. Downward dog helps to increase blood circulation and is a great stretch for your calves.
volunteer
g
AMERICAN RED CROSS - SCENIC BLUFFS CHAPTER: American Red Cross prevents and alleviates human suffering in the face of emergencies by mobilizing the power of volunteers and the generosity of donors. Volunteers can support blood drives, train to respond to disasters, teach lifesaving First Aid/CPR classes, support our Armed Forces, assist at special events and more! 2927 Losey Blvd S, La Crosse, WI; volunteerwestern.wi@redcross.org; 877-618-6628 ext. 5822; www.redcross.org/wi/la-crosse. BETHANY LUTHERAN HOMES: Volunteers may assist with recreational activities, read aloud to residents, help with writing, assist with special events, help with weekly outings, manicures, one-on-one visits, sing-alongs, gardening, mail delivery, crafts, playing games, helping with computers, doing errands or shopping, helping with walks or outdoor time, teaching a special talent, and more. Download a volunteer form at www.bethanylutheranhomes.org or call 608.406.3900. BIG BROTHERS BIG SISTERS OF THE 7 RIVERS REGION: Volunteers enroll through Big Brothers Big Sisters and following an interview, references and a background check, are oriented and introduced to a little brother or little sister by BBBS staff. Regular support is available to assure that the relationship builds over time, and any logistical problems are resolved. For more info, please email Lyndsey Langer at llanger@7riversbbbs.org or Jeff Murawski at jmurawski@7riversbbbs.org or call 608.782.2227. BOYS AND GIRLS CLUBS OF GREATER LA CROSSE: The mission of the Boys & Girls Clubs of Greater La Crosse is to inspire and empower all young people, especially those who need us most, to realize their full potential as productive, responsible and caring citizens. Volunteers are a vital part of many programs at the Boys and Girls Clubs. Opportunities are available in many areas, including athletics, tutoring, game room management, recreation, special events and clerical areas. Your involvement and support is encouraged. For more information, please call 608.782.3926, or visit their website to fill out the volunteer application at www.bgcgl.org. CHILDREN’S MUSEUM: Lend a Hand! Volunteers are an important part of the Children’s Museum team. If you are enthusiastic, reliable and fond of children, check into current volunteer opportunities and contact us soon! Visit their website to fill out a volunteer application at www.funmuseum.org or call 608.784.2652. COULEE REGION HUMANE SOCIETY: Volunteers needed to help care for animals and collect donations for animals. For more information, call 608.781.4014. For a list of current opportunities, or to fill out an application, click the Volunteer link at www. couleehumane.com. COULEE REGION UNITED SOCCER ASSOCIATION (CRUSA): Help with concessions, trash removal, fundraising events, and tournament staff at the La Crosse area Field for Kids Facility in Industrial Park. For more information about volunteering, contact Vanessa Machado (volunteer organizer) at crusasoccer@ gmail.com or check out their website: www.crusasoccer.com. CROSSFIRE YOUTH CENTER: Crossfire seeks to transform the lives of local teens by providing safe and fun activities. Crossfire is always seeking volunteers who have a heart to serve. Volunteer opportunities include assisting in weight lifting, archery, outdoor activities, and our Friday night party alternative. 608-784-6565; amanda@crossfire4u.com; crossfire4u.com. ENCHANTED FOREST: Grab a couple bags of candy, your non-scary costume, and come pass out goodies along the Hixon Forest trails! Oct. 25th, 2014. Volunteer shift is from 1:00pm-6:15pm. Contact WisCorps at (608) 782-2494 or staff@wiscorps.org.
BETTERMENT OF OUR FORCOMMUNITY
YOU CAN DO
FRANCISCAN SPIRITUALITY CENTER: Volunteers provide the hospitality that makes FSC such a special place. They provide refreshment setup, work at the front desk, greet visitors and help with special events. Shifts are as little as one hour, primarily evenings and weekends. No special skills are needed. FSC is dedicated to anyone seeking God, meaning and wholeness. We’re at 920 Market Street, La Crosse. Please contact Linda Kerrigan at lkerrigan@fspa.org or 608-791-5276. More information about FSC at FSCenter.org. GREAT RIVERS UNITED WAY: Great Rivers United Way Volunteer Center hosts an array of volunteer opportunities. Give an hour. Give a Saturday. Give your best. We all have special talents. Things we can do to help. And when we reach out a hand to one, we influence the condition of all. There are hundreds of volunteer options available every day. Give the gift of you. Volunteer. (608) 796-1400; jlarsen@gruw.org; www. greatriversunitedway.org/volunteer-2. HABITAT FOR HUMANITY/RESTORE: For Women Build, construction, Critical Home Repair, ReStore, special events or office work, contact Bekky Mayfield, Volunteer Coordinator for Habitat for Humanity, at volunteer@habitatlacrosse.org or 608.785.2375 X1604. HILLVIEW URBAN AGRICULTURE CENTER: The mission of Hillview is to create a healthy community through a local, sustainable, and accessible food system. We have volunteer opportunities in the following programs: Market Baskets, vermicomposting, various gardening tasks, hoop house construction, fundraising, grant writing, and marketing. (608) 786-0338; vicki@vsm5.com; www.hillviewuac.org. HORSESENSE FOR SPECIAL RIDERS: Be a “side walker” or horse leader, exercise the therapy horses, muck out the barns, help with special events. Email executivedirector@hssrweb.org, call 608.791.4868 or fill out the online volunteer form at www.hssr.org. LA CRESCENT ANIMAL RESCUE: We are committed to being a no-kill shelter, which means we are always looking for both foster and permanent homes for the animals left in our care. At our facility, volunteer tasks available include cat and/or dog care, cleaning, clerical, and animal transportation. Must be 16 years of age. 523 S Chestnut St, La Crescent, MN. (507) 895-2066;www.lacrescentanimalrescue.blogspot.com. LA CROSSE AREA FAMILY YMCA: Volunteers are critically important to carrying out our mission, so we ask our program volunteers to go through an application and screening process similar to that of our paid staff members. This process ensures that the best fit is made between the new volunteer and the program they are matched with, while also ensuring the safety of our members, participants, staff and all of our volunteers. View volunteer opportunities with La Crosse’s largest youth-serving organization and fill out an application at the Get Involved link at www. laxymca.org. OUTDOOR RECREATION ALLIANCE (ORA): The Outdoor Recreation Alliance seeks to optimize world-class outdoor recreational opportunities. Volunteers are needed for various activities, including trail work. www.naturesplacetoplay.com. WARMING CENTER OF LA CROSSE: Volunteer for supplying dinner for the homeless, check-in, overnight watch, or morning clean up. Call Catholic Charities’ Mary Fitzpatrick at 608.782.0710 ext. 220 for more information or to volunteer. WISCONSIN CONSERVATION CORPS: WisCorps engages youth and young adults in direct conservation projects on public lands across the state. Volunteer opportunities include trail maintenance, tree planting, event assistance, and more! (608) 782-2494; staff@wiscorps. org; www.wiscorps.org.
Place your FREE listing! Email info@muellermediacorp.com with your volunteer opportunity or calendar event. Listings are subject to approval and may be edited for content or space.
CAN YOU HELP OUT A LITTLE?
Big Brothers Big Sisters of the 7 Rivers Region.
Article: Jason Larsen
GET INVOLVED
W H AT
helpin
Big Brothers Big Sisters of the 7 Rivers Region builds positive, lasting relationships through (one-on-one) mentorship. The organization began nationally in 1904 - in New York City. The idea was that a positive role model in the life of an at-risk youth might be all it took to permanently and positively change a young person’s life. It worked then, and it’s thriving now. The mentors are referred to as “Bigs,” and the mentees are called “Littles.” Big Brothers Big Sisters works to match Bigs and Littles with similar interests. The organization has been “changing lives for the better, forever” in the 7 Rivers Region for over 45 years. Big Brothers Big Sisters adds many benefits to the social landscape of our region. Beyond the traditional Big-Little matchup, it offers site-based youth mentoring (which pairs high school students with elementary students). These relationships have an academic focus, and there’s a good reason for that. “The number one concern for parents seeking a Big for their Little one is education,” according to Jeff Murawski, director of program services. He’s a former Big himself. This year Big Brothers Big Sisters will also be piloting the REACH program. REACH stands for Recreation, Education, Art, Civics and Health. As part of REACH, Big Brothers Big Sisters will host free, themed events that focus on one of the aspects of REACH. The goal is to provide another free and easy way to build the Little-Big relationship. Another perk of REACH is that the program will offer professional on-site mentorship support from the staff. Whether you’re a young professional, a top-notch college student, or somewhere in between, chances are there’s a Little who would make your life more interesting, more fun and more rewarding. There are kiddos waiting. Some just want a Big to play a Little ball with. Some kiddos could use a Little help dividing fractions. Some kids have no idea what they’re waiting for because, well ... they’re just little kiddos. Each year, hundreds of area youth sign up and are matched with a positive role model. If you ask Jeff Murawski what the best part about being a Big is, he’ll give a familiar but true answer - “The best part of being involved is it gives you a socially acceptable reason to act like a kid again.” To find out more about becoming a Big Brother or Big Sister, hop onto their website at www.7riversbbbs. org or give them a call at 608-782-2227. Jason Larsen is the community impact director at Great Rivers United Way, a community-minded volunteer, and an occasional freelance writer. KlutchChronicle.com \\ October, 2014
27
sup IN THE COULEE REGION (WHAT’S UP)
Local events calendar for October 2014 OCTOBER 1 ARTS: “WITH NEW EYES” All Day @ The Pump House in La Crosse Featuring work by former writer for National Geographic Traveler & Reader’s Digest, Jeff Rennicke.
EXERCISE AND OUTDOORS: ZUMBA SESSION 1 5:30 pm-6:30 pm @ Community Park in Onalaska every Monday and Wednesday 10-week session = $40 ($45 for non-residents); one day/week = $25 ($30 for non-residents). Last day for standard or online registration is Oct. 3, 2014.
ARTS: “CELEBRATE” All Day @ The Pump House in La Crosse (every day until Oct. 18, 2014) Features art by the La Crosse County 4-H Students.
FOOD AND DRINK: FREE WHEELIN’ WEDNESDAY All Day @ Pearl Street Brewery in La Crosse every Wednesday First pint free if you ride your bike down to the tasting room.
EXERCISE AND OUTDOORS: DISC GOLF 9 am-9 pm @ Justin Tails Resort in Sparta (daily until Dec. 31, 2014) $5/person/day; equipment provided for use on course or for sale in pro shop.
MARKET: CAMERON PARK FARMERS MARKET 4 pm-8 pm every day until Oct. 31 @ Cameron Park in La Crosse Featuring local produce and other foods as well as crafts, jewelry and live music.
EXERCISE AND OUTDOORS: NATURE WALKS & EXHIBITS 8 am-3:30 pm @ Upper Mississippi River National Wildlife and Fish Refuge Visitor Center in Onalaska (Monday-Friday; Saturday from 10 am-4 pm) Free; walk 3 miles of paved or packed gravel trails or learn more about the Mississippi River from the exhibits inside.
TRIVIA: TRIVIA NIGHT 8 pm-10 pm @ Flipside Pub & Grill in La Crosse Free to play; includes categories from sports and music to history and science.
EXERCISE AND OUTDOORS: NIGHT YOGA 5:45 pm-6:45 pm @ 415 Main St. in Onalaska $45 ($50 for non-residents); last day for standard and online registration is Oct. 14, 2014.
ARTS: “WITH NEW EYES” All Day @ The Pump House in La Crosse Featuring work by former writer for National Geographic Traveler & Reader’s Digest, Jeff Rennicke.
EXERCISE AND OUTDOORS: WILDLIFE CRUISE 10:30 am-12:30 pm @ Riverside Park in La Crosse (every Wednesday, Saturday & Sunday) Tickets: 2 hour cruises - $19-$25; Fall 3 hour cruises- $35-$40 (children 3 & under free).
ARTS: CANVAS PAINTING CLASS 6 pm every Tuesday, 6:30 pm every Thursday, & 2 pm every other Sunday @ All Glazed Up, 205 Pearl St. in La Crosse
OCTOBER 2
All events are subject to change, call ahead for details. Listings in the calendar are free. If you have an event that you would like to include in an upcoming issue, go to our website www.klutchchronicle.com or call 608-796-8780. Cost Unknown. No experience required; have some fun while creating an amazing piece of art! FOOD AND DRINK: WINE TASTING 1 pm-6 pm Sunday, Monday, & Thursday; 1 pm-8 pm Friday & Saturday @ Branches Winery in Westby Try some award-winning favorites along with appetizers that include artisan cheeses and woodfired pizzas. MUSIC: KIES & KOMPANIE 5 pm-8 pm @ The Starlite Lounge in La Crosse Free Trivia: League Trivia 8 pm @ Howie’s in La Crosse (every Thursday) Free to play.
OCTOBER 3 ARTS: “WITH NEW EYES” All Day @ The Pump House in La Crosse Featuring work by former writer for National Geographic Traveler & Reader’s Digest, Jeff Rennicke. EXERCISE AND OUTDOORS: LIQUIDO YOGA APPAREL TRUNK SHOW AND YOGA SOCIAL 6:30-8:30 pm @ Root Down Yoga Studio in La Crosse Free. Shop a new line of yoga apparel, sip and socialize. Cash, checks, and credit cards will be accepted for trunk show purchases. FOOD AND DRINK: SIP TO SAVE LIVES 5-8 pm @ JavaVino in La Crosse $30/person ($50 for two tickets purchased in advance). The Coulee Region Humane Society is putting on a wine & beer tasting to raise money for homeless animals. Purchase tickets online at www. couleeregionhumane.com, in person at Coulee Region Humane Society or at 911 Critter Court in Onalaska. MUSIC: FOSSIL EYES Time TBA @ The Warehouse, 328 Pearl St. in La Crosse Tickets: TBA THEATRE: A WRINKLE IN TIME 7:30 pm @ La Crosse Community Theatre Tickets: TBA
OCTOBER 4 ARTS: “WITH NEW EYES” All Day @ The Pump House in La Crosse Featuring work by former writer for National Geographic Traveler & Reader’s Digest, Jeff Rennicke. EXERCISE AND OUTDOORS: GLOW IN THE DEKE 5K 7 pm @ UW-L’s Veterans Memorial Field in La Crosse $25 race fee EXERCISE AND OUTDOORS: 5TH ANNUAL BIG MUDDY RUN 10:45 am @ Myrick Park in La Crosse $90 registration fee age 18+ ($72 before 9/15); age 7-17 = $50 ($40 before 9/15); college student = $70 ($56 before 9/15); 4 or more member team = $60/person ($48/person before 9/15). Refreshments and awards to follow. EXERCISE AND OUTDOORS: DOWN SYNDROME AWARENESS WALK 10 am-1 pm @ Onalaska American Legion, 731 Sand Lake Rd. Free to participate; food and shirts will be available for purchase, and all proceeds will go toward area programs for Down syndrome, as well as to families of those with Down syndrome. FESTIVAL: APPLE AFFAIR All day @ The Square in downtown Galesville Enjoy a bike ride, food (a lot of apple treats), crafts and activities throughout the day!
28
October, 2014 // KlutchChronicle.com
FOOD AND DRINK: BREWERY TOUR 12 pm-5 pm @ Pearl Street Brewery in La Crosse (every Saturday until Dec. 27, 2014) Tours start at 1, 2, 3, and 4 pm; there is a free souvenir pint glass at the end of the tour. MARKET: RIVERSIDE PARK FARMERS MARKET 7 pm-12 am @ Riverside Park in La Crosse (every Saturday until Oct. 25, 2014) Come and support local farmers, bakers and crafters! MUSIC: ANTICS AT THE CAVALIER THEATER 7 pm-10 pm @ The Cavalier Theater in La Crosse Tickets: $10 (online purchase includes fee); Antics is returning to La Crosse, and Party MetaZoa and the Cavalier’s DJ Jason C. will also be performing. THEATRE: A WRINKLE IN TIME 7:30 pm @ La Crosse Community Theatre Tickets: TBA
OCTOBER 5 MUSIC: ZZ TOP 7:30 pm @ The La Crosse Center Tickets: $39.50 or $65 THEATRE: A WRINKLE IN TIME 2 pm @ La Crosse Community Theatre Tickets: TBA
OCTOBER 6 EXERCISE AND OUTDOORS: MONDAY NIGHT RUNS 6 pm @ Grand Bluff Running in downtown La Crosse (every Monday) Everyone is welcome to join this weekly running group; refreshments follow run. TRIVIA: DJ TRIVIA 9 pm @ Howie’s in La Crosse (every Monday) Free to play.
OCTOBER 7 TRIVIA: HOWIE’S BINGO 9 pm @ Howie’s in La Crosse (every Tuesday) Free to play.
OCTOBER 8 TRIVIA: TRIVIA NIGHT 8 pm-10 pm @ Flipside Pub & Grill in La Crosse Free to play; includes categories from sports and music to history and science.
OCTOBER 9 THEATRE: YESTERDAY - TRIBUTE TO THE BEATLES 7:30 pm @ Lyche Theatre at Weber Center in La Crosse Tickets: $19 for students (with ID), $32 for adults; listen to all of your Beatle favorites!
OCTOBER 10 THEATRE: YESTERDAY - TRIBUTE TO THE BEATLES 7:30 pm @ Lyche Theatre at Weber Center in La Crosse Tickets: $19 for students (with ID), $32 for adults; listen to all of your Beatle favorites!
OCTOBER 11 HISTORIC DOWNTOWN LA CROSSE DAY Free activities all day in downtown La Crosse. ARTS: STUDENT ART EXHIBITION Time TBA @ The Warehouse in La Crosse Tickets: TBA
sup IN THE COULEE REGION (WHAT’S UP)
EXERCISE AND OUTDOORS: FRIAR FROLIC 9 am @ Viterbo University in La Crosse $15 registration fee FESTIVAL: FALL GIFT AND CRAFT SHOW 9 am-4 pm @ Onalaska Omni Center Free
OCTOBER 12 EXERCISE AND OUTDOORS: USING THE WISDOM OF THE 7 CHAKRAS: A 7-WEEK WORKSHOP 7:15-8:30 pm @ Root Down Yoga Studio in La Crosse, Sunday evenings until Nov. 23 $150/person (students and seniors receive 20% discount). Join us for a top-down journey through the chakras. Discover how you can use the wisdom and tools of yoga to move through resistance and bring your dreams to reality. FESTIVAL: FALL GIFT AND CRAFT SHOW 10 am-3 pm @ Onalaska Omni Center Free
OCTOBER 14 FOOD AND DRINK: KLUTCH LIVE 7-9 pm @ Howie’s in La Crosse Free pint and coozie! Watch some sports and hang with Klutch staff! FOOD AND DRINK: PEARL STREET BEER DINNER 6 pm @ JavaVino in La Crosse Join us for an evening filled with food and local beer. Our favorite brewmasters from Pearl Street Brewery are teaming up with us for a delicious beer dinner. Six different PSB brews will be paired with six different courses of food. (We will be posting the menu soon on our Facebook page.) $40/person. Reservations are required and seating is limited. Please call 608-787-5282 to save your seat.
OCTOBER 15 TRIVIA: TRIVIA NIGHT 8 pm-10 pm @ Flipside Pub & Grill in La Crosse Free to play; includes categories from sports and music to history and science. THEATRE: DARK LA CROSSE TOURS 6:30, 7:30, & 8:30 pm @ La Crosse Public Library Archives Free; call 608-789-7136 or email archives@ lacrosselibrary.org to reserve your spot on this journey through La Crosse’s past.
OCTOBER 17 EXERCISE AND OUTDOORS: PARTNER FLOW/THAI YOGA WORKSHOP & HAPPY HOUR 5:30-7:30 pm @ Root Down Yoga Studio in La Crosse $35/person (students and seniors receive 20% discount). We will explore a creative sequence of mutually beneficial partner asanas and stretches. Let’s keep the connection flowing afterward! Stick around and enjoy some snacks and libations. This is the perfect kick-off to your weekend!
OCTOBER 18 MUSIC: ADAM PALM BAND 8 pm @ The Grand Hotel Ballroom, 215 Pearl St. in La Crosse Tickets available at People’s Food Co-op and McCaffrey’s.
OCTOBER 22 TRIVIA: TRIVIA NIGHT 8 pm-10 pm @ Flipside Pub & Grill in La Crosse Free to play; includes categories from sports and music to history and science.
OCTOBER 23 EXERCISE AND OUTDOORS: GO W/ THE FLOW WITH BEN RIVET AND TORI REYNOLDS 6:30-8 pm @ Root Down Yoga Studio in La Crosse $15/person (students and seniors receive 20% discount). Tori’s powerful but playful vinyasa sequence is scored by Ben’s acoustic guitar and vocals, paced by live-looped beatboxing and dictated by each class’s abilities.
OCTOBER 24 MUSIC: HORSESHOES & HAND GRENADES 7 pm-12 am @ The Popcorn Tavern in La Crosse Tickets: $10 (online purchase includes fee) THEATRE: THE 39 STEPS 7:30 pm @ La Crosse Community Theatre Tickets: TBA
OCTOBER 25 EXERCISE AND OUTDOORS: GREAT PUMPKIN CHASE 5K 9 am @ Hixon Forest in La Crosse (same day registration starts at 8 am) $20 registration fee before 10/25; $25 same day registration fee. After the race, enjoy food, refreshments and live music! MUSIC: PLATINUM EDITION: 125 YEARS OF SONG 7:30 pm-9:30 pm @ The Fine Arts Center on Viterbo University campus in La Crosse Tickets: $14-$20; listen to Viterbo’s show choir perform popular songs from 12 decades!
Quality Furniture at Budget Prices
Perfect for Back-to-School!
2100 West Ave S. La Crosse WI www.boyersbudgetfurniture.com boyersbudgetfurniture@yahoo.com Mon-Thurs 9-6 Fri 9-7 Sat 9-5 608-788-0535
The Great Pumpkin Chase 5K Run/Walk 2014
Sat, October 25thth Benefitting...
THEATRE: THE 39 STEPS 7:30 pm @ La Crosse Community Theatre Tickets: TBA
OCTOBER 26 THEATRE: THE 39 STEPS 2 pm @ La Crosse Community Theatre Tickets: TBA
OCTOBER 29 TRIVIA: TRIVIA NIGHT 8 pm-10 pm @ Flipside Pub & Grill in La Crosse Free to play; includes categories from sports and music to history and science.
OCTOBER 30
100% off-road trek through Hixon Forest! Pumpkin Pie! Costume Contest!
MUSIC: ARCHERS AND ILLUMINATORS Time TBA @ The Warehouse in La Crosse Tickets: TBA; From Cities Above & Teenagers also performing.
Live Music by Adam Palm!
To register: In person 2702 Quarry Rd, La Crosse Phone (608) 782-2494 Online or for more info, go to
www.wiscorps.org
/WisCorps /GreatPumpkinChase
THEATRE: THE 39 STEPS 7:30 pm @ La Crosse Community Theatre Tickets: TBA
OCTOBER 31 THEATRE: THE 39 STEPS 7:30 pm @ La Crosse Community Theatre Tickets: TBA
NOVEMBER 1 MUSIC: HALLOWEEN BASH III 7 pm @ Overtime Sports Bar in La Crosse Costume contests, live music from Brat Pack Radio, drink specials and more!
EXTENDED EVENTS PUMP HOUSE: KADER GALLERY: WITH NEW EYES Artist: Jeff Rennicke Exhibition: July 16, 2014 – Oct. 4, 2014
“With New Eyes” features the work of Jeff Rennicke, former writer for National Geographic Traveler and Reader’s Digest. He encourages the viewer, through beauty and creativity, to “have new eyes” rather than see new landscapes. His exhibition of nature photography has a unique twist created by using objects such as a real crystal ball, secondhand glass, and a lighted wire. With an array of traditional nature photography, and the incorporation of various objects such as crystal balls or sheets of ice, Jeff exposes the miraculous in the mundane.
Exhibition: Sep. 10 – Oct. 18, 2014 Featuring the work of La Crosse County 4-H students, this exhibit is an example of the powerful way in which art enriches our youth and connects our community.
FRONT GALLERY: IMMACULATE PERCEPTION Artist: Ben Alberti and Liz Bowman Exhibition: Sep. 10 – Oct. 4, 2014 In this collaborative series of paintings and woodblock prints, Pump House instructors Ben Alberti and Liz Bowman combine their loves for nature and science in order to challenge viewers to look at their own ideas more critically.
GLOW IN THE DEKE http://www.glowinthedeke.com/
BALCONY GALLERY: CELEBRATE! Artists: 4-H Students KlutchChronicle.com \\ October, 2014
29
FALL FAVS. LA CROSSE ANNUAL TURKEY TROT http://www.festivalfoodsturkeytrot.com/la-crosse
THE GREAT PUMPKIN CHASE https://www.facebook.com/GreatPumpkinChase www.wiscorps.org FIELD OF SCREAMS http://www.cityoflacrosse.org/index. aspx?NID=2682
yo! follow us!
October, 2014 // KlutchChronicle.com
from a New Angle. on the
flip side
30 My final piece of advice is this: You need to put yourself and your needs above your ex’s and his girlfriend’s. Realize that you deserve to be away from this drama and take ownership of your circumstances. Hurt me once, shame on you. Hurt me twice, shame on me. Do not be too passive to protect yourself. Stop worrying about their feelings and focus on your future; imagine how bright it looks without them in it! Above all else, stay happy and stay healthy. The Cure: I would never tell someone to move in order to get away from a problem. That, in many ways, sounds like running away when what you need to be doing is standing up for yourself. That being said, if you happen to have an available option that would be good for you, take it and get out of there. But do not uproot and put yourself out because of their shenanigans. I can appreciate your reluctance to contact the police but, and I can’t stress this enough, her legal troubles are NOT your problem. By coming onto your property and taking your things (regardless of the ‘why’), she is breaking the law. If you want to be ‘fair,’ give her and him ONE fair warning. Let them know the next time the police will be called immediately. This puts the decision in their hands. Of course, if and when the time comes, you need to stick to that assertion.
Information
Why “Smile” Sucks By: Briana Rupel
E
ver since I scored my first gig as a Subway sandwich artist in high school, I’ve worked within some realm of the service industry, including bartending at one of the busiest watering holes in downtown La Crosse, so you can bet I’ve dealt with it all. A schizophrenic man shaping his thumb and index into a gun and shooting me down point-blank after I poured him a Coke? Check. A 21-year-old bro repeatedly bonking me on the head with a giant inflatable hammer after the Oktoberfest parade while I’m making change? Check. A grown-ass drunk woman calling me a bitch as she whipped a boat of peanuts at my face because I asked her to leave? Yup. Yet these things are surprisingly easy for me to shrug off. Mostly because I can’t take them seriously; they’re pretty laughable scenarios when you just step outside of it. But there’s one thing that is guaranteed to get under my skin. Ironically, my mood has been known to instantly sour with a simple one-word command: “Smile.” I can already hear my fellow industry familia shouting an audible chorus of “Hell, YES!” in agreement, and some of them will probably swoop in for a high-five later, because they’ve all been there; they get it. But I also know some people won’t see what the big deal is. “Hey,” some of you will say, “you’re in customer service. It’s your job to smile and be friendly.” And you’re absolutely right. Trust me, if I didn’t believe that 100 percent, I wouldn’t have made my money waiting tables or slinging drinks for so many years. The thing is, I’m a friendly person naturally, not because I have to be. And I smile so damn much that I already have little lines squinting from the corners of my eyes and dusting the tops of my cheekbones ... and I’m barely 31. So forgive me if it always catches me off guard when a guy says to me, “Hey. You know, you’d be a lot prettier if you smiled.” Forgive me if I suddenly want to punch something when a group of businessmen come in for a happy hour cocktail, look at me and say, “Aw, smile hon, it can’t be that bad ...” Hold up. Nothing is bad! I’m having a great time ... well, I was, until that asinine comment escaped your mouth. It’s just that, when I’m up to my elbows in dishwater, wiping stubborn lipstick from the rims of countless glasses, I’m not going to have a perma-grin. Not because I’m not enjoying my job. Not because my life must suck and I need you to remind me to cheer up. But simply because I’m. Washing. Dishes. When I have four orders in my head simultaneously, I’m focused; not angry. That, or I’ve just worked on my feet for nine hours. Guess what, you want me to smile? Give me a foot rub and then we’ll talk. In all seriousness though, to get to the bottom of why this is such a troubling phenomenon is to acknowledge a few truths: 1. When you command someone to smile, you’re telling them that they’re inherently in the wrong for just navigating the world in their own way. Everybody has the right to their emotions, and they shouldn’t have to put on a fake front simply to appease anybody else. 2. Telling someone to smile is in no way a compliment; it’s a power play. It has nothing to do with making the stoic person feel good. Instead it has everything to do with the perpetrator validating his sense of entitlement, as in, “Your worth is based on your willingness to please me.”
3. Don’t agree with that last statement? How often is the request to smile phrased in this way: “Smile for me, sweetie” or “C’mon, give me a smile.” Like I said, it’s never for your benefit. It’s all about theirs. Brooklyn-based artist Tatyana Fazlalizadeh started a street art project in 2012 called “Stop Telling Women to Smile” to bring attention to this issue, as well as street harassment as a whole. She draws women’s portraits as she interviews them about their experiences, and then creates a huge poster with a key phrase from their interviews typed underneath their portraits. When she goes out on the streets to paste them up, she’s essentially giving these women the chance to speak back to the aggressor. The posters shout out things like, “I am not here for you” or “I am not your property.” So the next time someone tells you to smile, just offer up a simple, “Oh, I’m sorry, I guess I forgot the part where I woke up this morning and my reason for existing was solely to be aesthetically pleasing to you!” Then give them a big sh*t-eating grin as you reach for the nearest boat of peanuts.
There are many things that make this author smile, including - but not limited to - puppies, Sour Patch Kids, and YouTube videos of people falling.
The Pest: With regard to his new girlfriend, you should assume she is as unbalanced as he is. Manipulators will lure people in and find ways to have them join their quest. Think of him as the sickness and her as the carrier. You need to deal with her in the same way you deal with him. Disconnect all contact immediately. The Plague: As far as your ex goes, your first order of business is to be absolutely sure you are done with him and not turning back. If part of you isn’t, any steps you take will be for nothing. If you are done, you need to be done. I applaud people who are able to stay connected and cordial after a breakup; however, you owe nothing to a person that dragged you through the dirt, then picked you up only to push you down again and again. Narcissist … sociopath … take your pick. Either way you slice it, your ex sounds like someone that enjoys emotionally abusing you. You would be better off if you discontinued ALL contact with him immediately. The longer the phone calls, employment requests, and other forms of contact continue, the longer the stalking, abuse and manipulation will continue. You are the only person that can stop this pattern. I’ve moved on, My initial reaction is to commend you and your many attempts to stay level-headed through all of this. It sounds like you have had a long history of pain inflicted by your ex. The question you need to ask yourself now is: What has all of this patience, fairness and politeness gotten you? It appears you are in a rotten predicament regardless of those efforts. You must understand that your ex, his new girlfriend, and their feelings are simply not your problem; you, your property and your wellbeing are your problems, and those are the things I suggest you start focusing on. Sincerely, I’ve moved on. Now should I just move? Dear Liv, My ex started dating my next door neighbor. At first I didn’t care because my ex was not an emotionally healthy person anyway (and more not-fun stuff I won’t get into) and I don’t give a darn about him. But since she lives next door she knows who I am so she started sending me messages and crossing a fence between our houses to look around my yard when I’m not home. She even took some of my property because he told her she could which I am trying to be fair and believe it was a misunderstanding. When my ex and I were split in the past, he moved in with my old next door neighbor, dated my cousin and three other women who I thought were my friends, tried getting a job where I was working at, and even sat in front of my boyfriend’s house overnight a few times. Now he’s dating this girl (I say girl because she’s only a few years older than his daughter) and even asked me several times if my current job would hire him even though there’s not an open position. I’m trying to be polite about this whole thing, but this girl isn’t very mature and won’t stop. Some have advised me to call the police but I know this girl already has legal problems since she just got out of jail recently and I don’t want to make it worse for her.
Then there’s this guy, just being all kinds of awesome. Photo credit: http://stoptellingwomentosmile.com
5K Race Route - Track to BC to Gale Rd and back to Track
GET ACTIVE THIS HALLOWEEN
JOIN uS fOr THE Y’S SuGAr GLOW AWAY 1K Or 3K WALK PrESENTEd bY:
Celebrate Halloween in a fun and active way! Get the family together and choose to walk either a 1K or a 3K. Both walks lead you along a glowing pathway designed to inform families about the benefits of a healthy and active lifestyle to help prevent the onset of diseases such as type 1 diabetes and obesity.
rEGISTrATION: $6 per person until Oct. 16th $8 Oct. 17-22nd $10 day of event (23rd) - registration at Myrick Park
fOr mOrE INfOrmATION VISIT WWW.LAxYmCA.OrG
rea!
Kids A
le!
Bake Sa Costumes Encourage d!
All proceeds will benefit local charities and programs for those in need.
$20 w/ T-shirt $15 w/o T-shirt $12 T-shirt only
to Register: In person at: Sparta High School Main Office Day of: Starting at 9am
By mail: SHS Key Club 506 N. Black River St. Sparta, WI 54656 *Please note t-shirt size on check
Online at: http://goo.gl/pz4xSS
5-7 Pm THurSdAY, OCTObEr 23, 2014 at the myrick Park Gun Shelter
*Registration and payment required by 10/15 to guarantee a t-shirt.
KlutchChronicle.com \\ October, 2014
31
The Pearl Ice cream Parlor Soda FounTaIn & conFecTIonery
La Crosse’s Finest Consignment Apparel for over 30 years!
grand hoTel ballroom & gallery arT 211 Pearl TJ’S la croSSe ShoP cheddarheadS gIFT gallery
Fresh new looks arrive daily including purses & accessories.
CheCk out our oktoberfest tees!
M, T, W, F 10:30-5 • Thurs. 10:30-6 • Sat. 10:30-3 1400 West Ave. S. • La Crosse, WI 608.785.1220 • www.thesecondshowing.com
Black Squrl Skate
427 Main St, La Crosse
www.blacksqurlskate.com
Fully Insured! e We com! to you
The Pearl coFFee houSe
hISTorIc
847-951-4442
Pearl ST. WeST
CritterComfortPetCare.com
200 Pearl ST. • la croSSe, WI • 608-784-8899
KRONER’S Locally owned for over 145 years! 319-321 Pearl St., La Crosse M-F 8:30-5:00, Sat 9:00-1:00
the back page are you reading this? so are your customers! You’ll be seen on the Back Page. As low as $60/issue. Contact us today!
Contact us by email at info@muellermediacorp.com or call 608-796-8780 for more information on rates, distribution, and sizes.
Sat. Nov 1 7:00 pm
FEATURING:
Overtime Sports Bar
SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 1 HALLOWEEN HANGOVER COSTUME CONTEST: SAVE YOUR COSTUME TO WIN MONEY! 7 PM PCASHOVERTIME SPORTS BAR PRIZES FOR BEST OVERALL COSTUMES s
HAL L OWEEN HANG OV ER C OST U MAND E C ONTEST : S AVE UR COS TUME TO WIN MO NEY! BEST 80 YOCOSTUMES
PEARL STREET WEST
50% of all proceeds will be donated to local non-profit organizations including: RSVP, Children's Museum of La Crosse, Grow will Your Brain, American Red Cross. 50% of all proceeds be donated to local non-profit organizations including:
Featuring:
SPONSORED BY:
The
ICE CREAM PARLOR
hotel
ballroom
ART 211 PEARL ST
R
C ASH PR IZES FOR BEST O V ER AL L C OST U MES AND BES T ‘80’S CO S TUMES.
WI S SCO NSIN GIFT
SPECIALTY SHOPPES
207-215 PEARL ST.
RSVP, Children’s Museum of La Crosse, Grow Your Brain, American Red Cross.
SPONSORED BY:
Handmade Pottery Children & Adult Classes
Timothy J. Gillespie, CRPC
321 Main St. La Crosse, WI 608-782-3904 www.generousearthpottery.com
Private Wealth AdvisorCRPC® Timothy J. Gillespie,
Wealth Advisor KulinskiPrivate & Gillespie
Kulinski &practice Gillespieof Financial advisory Financial advisory practice of Ameriprise Financial Services, Inc. Ameriprise Financial Services, Inc.
Handmade Pottery Children & Adult Classes 321 Main St. La Crosse, WI 608-782-3904 www.generousearthpottery.com
Paint Your Own Pottery Jewelry & Glass Fusing Week-Long and Mini Summer Camps 205 Pearl St. La Crosse, WI 608-782-7248 www.allglazedup.com
ICE CREAM PARLOR
Finnottes Nuts FinnottesGourmet Gourmet Chocolate Chocolate &&Nuts Boyer’s Budget Furniture Boyer's Budget Furniture The Second Showing The Second Showing
** IF POSSIBLE AND IT STILL IS READABLE/LOOKS NICE, USE THE PEARL ST. WEST LOGO...IF NOT, JUST USE THE SINGLE PEARL LOGO..THANKS!