Health & Wellbeing

Health & Wellbeing We must talk about death in order to process loss

One thing the pandemic has made many of us think about is our mortality. Death is never very far from people’s minds anyway. As we all know, it’s an experience we’re all going to have and it’s something we don’t talk about nearly enough. Thanatophobia is commonly known as ‘death anxiety’ and although not defined as a distinct mental health disorder; is often linked to depression or other anxiety disorders. For some, it can become an overwhelming preoccupation or even an obsession. It’s certainly something that is often in the thoughts of my clients; whether it manifests in such scenarios as suicide ideation, or fear of getting sick or old. Understandably, most of us want to die peacefully and without pain –which is why this pandemic has been so frightening; not only is the virus very contagious but we’ve all heard of or seen the terrifying symptoms such as breathlessness which can lead to a very scary and unpleasant death. It’s often said that none of us know when our time is up –however working in mental health I’ve met many who not only would welcome death, but actively plan (and sometimes succeed) in achieving it. Death can sometimes seem like the ultimate peace – an ending of mental torment, physical pain or both. If we’re honest, at some point in many of our lives, we’ve been low enough to think about being dead, if not to actually wish it on ourselves. It’s always an ‘option’ in the background. Living is not generally easy for most. Things like incapacity, loneliness, a lack of meaning and purpose, poverty, injustice, inequality, violence, fear or pain can all lead to thoughts of death and dying. Old people often comment that they’re exhausted and tired of living. We also hear of people dying after suffering terribly from illness, and we feel they’ve at last found peace. Death, in whatever form, is a very personal event – sometimes abrupt or at the end of a long emotional journey. It’s something we all have to endure alone; even if we’re surrounded by others at the time. Having worked in hospitals, hospices, with the elderly and in bereavement counselling; I’m a firm believer in death/dying being talked about, discussed and processed – by both those experiencing it and those witnessing it. Grief and loss can have a huge detrimental effect on our mental health, which if left untreated, can often manifest itself in poor physical health too. Dying should not be something we fear but something we’re prepared for as much as possible; whenever it comes. It doesn’t have to be a taboo or uncomfortable subject; as we can all share our fears, hopes and dreams. Death is not just about sadness and loss, but also about reflecting on the experiences of life. Dying is part of life. It’s far too important to be ignored or not talked about. n David Stanton is a psychologist based in the Blackmore Vale. tatvacenter.com edas-addictionservices.com

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Call 111 first, urges Dorset HealthCare

Dorset’s network of minor injuries units has re-opened –sparking a plea for people to direct their health worries towards the 111 service. Think NHS 111 first if you need urgent care, says Dorset HealthCare. They say: “NHS 111 is the way you can access the right treatment, in the right place, at the right time and will now be the gateway to the county’s minor injuries units (MIUs), along with a range of other services. “Rather than having to look up different MIU phone numbers, you can now go to 111.nhs.com online or call 111 – and if you need to go to an MIU, the 111 service will book you in.” With national restrictions now gradually being eased, all of the MIUs run by Dorset HealthCare –including Sherborne, Blandford, Shaftesbury and Wimborne – will revert to their pre-covid opening hours. People are asked not to just turn up, but to call for a telephone assessment first. This will ensure people won’t have unnecessary waits and will help to avoid crowded waiting rooms. It will also mean some patients can be treated remotely and will not need to make an unnecessary journey. The Dorchester ED will still be available 24/7 as usual for serious and life threatening injuries and conditions, but will not be able to accommodate less serious cases while refurbishment work takes place. Jane Elson, Dorset HealthCare’s service director for integrated community services, said: “We’re delighted not only to re-open all our MIU services, but also to provide them in a more targeted, efficient way. We had to change things over the past year, and prebooked appointments worked extremely well.” Full details of all Dorset HealthCare’s MIUs, including opening times, are available at dorsethealthcare.nhs.uk/pati ents-and-visitors/ourservices-hospitals/physical-h ealth/minor-injuries-unitsmius

Health & Wellbeing Setting some boundaries can be a really useful tool for stress

Boundaries feature regularly in my coaching. They define a period of time, an action or a relationship and are a really useful way of creating balance in your life. Not only that, they aid clearer communication. With clear and well thought out boundaries, we can increase our own productivity and focus as well as live or work in happier

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Go to edas-addictionservices.com or tatvacenter.com or call me on 07584 711488 harmony with others. Using boundaries increases your confidence, productivity and clarity and reduces stress. Sounds good? Personal boundaries: Try putting a boundary around a set time when you are unavailable because that is your time to practise a musical instrument or go to a pilates class. Something that needs protecting from other commitments. Or it could be a boundary in a relationship, such as arranging to ring an elderly dependent at a specific time so they know you are going to call but they must let you work etc at other times. Set this up carefully and with kindness. Personal boundaries can be just that –personal. Use them as a way of achieving your personal goals –anything from “I’m only going to drink wine at the weekend” to “I’m only going to book that holiday once I have completed my diploma’. Use them to support yourself as you feel best. At work: By setting boundaries around tasks, you are creating an environment where you can focus on that task entirely. Everything else is pushed to one side for the time being. You can set a time limit for yourself. This is compartmentalising which is a brilliant stress management tool that boosts productivity and focus therefore decreasing stress. At home: Collaborative boundaries, set by parents but in discussion with children. During lockdown parents have had to be flexible in new ways but maybe now is the time to start redefining these boundaries. Of course, these are not static boundaries but must develop as our children grow. This could be setting times when work chat or screens are not allowed. A set time when the family unit spends time together. Something set pretty much in stone that doesn’t get shoved out of the way by other ‘better’ plans. Whatever the boundary, this tool is a way of protecting ourselves or others as well as reducing stress and increasing productivity. Start small and don’t be afraid to adapt your boundaries accordingly. n Alice Johnsen is a life coach based near Sherborne. 07961 080513 alicejohnsen.co.uk

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Health & Wellbeing Elder is a statesman when it comes to health and wellbeing

Elder is one of our ancient and most useful of herbs. We use the flowers in early summer and then the berries in autumn. It does however have a mixed reputation. Early Christians believed that Judas hanged himself in an elder tree and that Christ’s cross was made from the wood, so it was seen as “the tree of death”, which I think is extremely sad for the lovely elder tree. It was perhaps so reviled as it was steeped in pagan history and very much a magical, fairy, witchy tree. If you found yourself sitting under it on Midsummer’s Eve, you would see the fairy king and you must never fall asleep as you may

20 NEW CLEAR 500ML FOOD GRADE PLASTIC BOTTLES with gold caps. Ideal for cordials or home brew. £12.80 discount for larger quantities 07714 289400 not wake up! Elder amulets were used to ward off thieves, rheumatism and epilepsy and to protect livestock. You should never cut an elder tree without asking permission from the tree and the wood “screams with pain” as it is burned and the boiling sap was the devil, spitting down the chimney. Rather later, if you planted an elder tree near the “privies” it helped keep insects at bay as the foliage contains a natural insect repellent and it likes rich, damp soil! We all now know elder flowers as a delicious cordial which sadly I cannot make as I am appalled by how much sugar goes into it and being a naturopath see sugar as the next tobacco. It is so bad for us and contributes to so many avoidable illnesses like obesity and diabetes type 2. The flowers are powerful herbs, and we should be harvesting them now on a dry morning. It is possible to use them fresh in a really quite good tea and combining them with nettle tops will help with hayfever symptoms as they are very good bronchodilators for the upper respiratory tract. They are powerful diaphoretics (making you sweat) so are useful in promoting a fever (particularly

combined with yarrow and peppermint) if you have a cold or flu and if the flowers are dried, it makes them more sedative so they will help the patient sleep through their fever. The flowers open our tubes and pores by stimulating circulation which then lubricates the skin and are indicated for children, adults and old people who have blue marbling or hard, dry red skin. They also help with digestion and clearing oedema (swollen ankles) and water retention either through the skin or the kidneys. n If interested in herbal medicine, I am taking consultations via Zoom through my college. Please contact me on 07742 453285 or pellyfiona@gmail.com. Fiona Chapman is studying naturopathy and herbal medicine at the College of Naturopathic Medicine In search of the eagle, who represents spiritual expansion

As I write this, I am sitting on a cushion of moss and heather above the Findhorn Valley. I have left the soft gentle rolling hills of North Dorset for the Monadhliath Mountains in the Highlands in search of the eagles that soar above the crags and call these mountains home. I have also come here for the remoteness. I relish the feeling of being truly ‘away’ and for that nothing compares to the Highlands. Here the air is clean and cool, and the only sounds are wind, water and birdsong. Any negative thoughts are cast away by the sheer expanse and beauty of the landscape before me. It is a place of perspective and contemplation; a place to reconnect with all that is important. The Findhorn Valley, known as the ‘Valley of Raptors’, is a hidden, secret glen surrounded by steep cliffs. It attracts all sorts of birds such as ring ouzel, dipper and curlew, but its biggest attraction are the birds of prey that the valley attracts such as merlins, kestrels, ospreys, peregrines, buzzards and eagles. There is much more besides, however. Clouds of wild pansies, marsh orchids, forgetme-nots, bilberry bushes, marsh marigolds and bird’s-foot trefoil colour my route, herds of red deer gather on the hilltops, and stunted, aged and gnarled birch trees provide habitat for migrant warblers. As I climb higher, hugging the banks of the stream, tiny froglets scramble awkwardly over the moss and accompany me until I find my favoured viewpoint. The best way to see an eagle is indeed to sit and wait and hope that the rising thermals bring him or her into view. It is the perfect excuse to stop and soak up the atmosphere. There are no guarantees of a sighting but after only a short while, I strike lucky. A white-tailed eagle, our largest bird of prey, leaves its craggy perch and glides like a flying plank effortlessly into the air with broad wings and outstretched finger-like feathers. Its 2.5 metre wingspan is astonishing. I watch in awe as he flies up and over the escarpment. So much emotion packed into a single moment: the joy of seeing an eagle. Apparently, such a sighting represents spiritual expansion, inspiration and achieving your dreams. I make my way down the hillside hoping these predictions are true. n Dr Susie Curtin curtin.susanna@gmail.com

A walk around...

with retired Dorset rights of way officer Chris Slade

MAPPOWDER

This walk is a little over five miles. Start at the church, which is worth a look, then go round the corner and head south down the road for about 600 yards. Then take a bridleway to your right, heading west then southwest crossing several fields and Thurnwood Farm, which has plenty of cows grazing. Soon after passing the farm there is a crossing of ways. Take the bridleway that takes you down a sunken wooded track, then, at another crossways, take the footpath that leads you north-eastwards across a field and around a farmyard until you meet a road which takes you north for five furlongs to a T-junction. Turn right, eastwards, then, after about 100 yards, turn left along a footpath that takes you north northeast across several fields, which may have cattle, for over a mile. There’s a problem about halfway as the footpath is obstructed by a hedge and ditch. This has been reported to Dorset Council, who may have sorted the problem by the time you visit. If not, the easy way round is to head east towards Parsonage Farm where you’ll soon find a gate to your left that gets you through the hedge and back on track. When the path gets to Boywood Farm turn right and follow the hedge eastnorth-east and after a furlong it will lead you through a garden onto a road. Cross the road and take a path that leads you south eastwards across several fields, then south following a hedge as far as a bridge, much loved by birds, which takes you onto the Hardy Way down to the road where you turn right, south west, for half a mile back to the village, where you’ll soon find your car.

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