March 2018 by ParentMap

ALTHY R

Dr. John Gottman •

MARCH 7

see p. 16

SEATTLE

EXPERT

parenting is a trip!

ATIONSH

’cause

•

Free Fun Near You

Spr ng! p. 31

The Money Issue: How to Get Your Family’s Finances on Track p. 12 How to balance life when your little bundles of bills arrive 39

TEACH YOUR KID TO BE SAVVY ABOUT MONEY

A financial guru offers her advice on giving your family an edge 43

SUMMER!

Get a jump on summer camp planning with our Summer issue

MARCH 2018

GET YOUR SH*T TOGETHER WITH THESE MONEY TIPS

Save the Date!

2 • March 2018 • parentmap.com

FIELD TRIP PACKAGES Storytelling Guided tour

GROUP TOURS HibulbCulturalCenter.org

Hibulb Cultural Center 6410 23rd Ave NE Tulalip, WA 98271 Located less than a mile west of I-5 exit 199.

Outdoor scavenger hunt Listen to traditional stories in the longhouse Canoe Guided tour Gallery scavenger hunt Sand and design your own cedar paddle necklace Weaving Guided tour Weaving scavenger hunt Weave your own cedar mat pendant

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inside MARCH 2018 The Money Issue

, cause parenting is a trip!

Making Cents of Your Divorce Feature

12 H OW BECOMING A SINGLE

PARENT IMPROVED MY FINANCES

How one mom adapted when she began financing life alone

Parenting

6 NEWS AROUND TOWN

15 M AKING CENTS OF YOUR

DIVORCE

Keep your sanity — and financial stability — whatever your situation

8 DEAR READER

A note from our publisher

10 CRIB NOTES

20 5 MISTAKES WOMEN MAKE

DURING DIVORCE — AND HOW TO AVOID THEM

Ready for baby?

Expectant and new parents, this is for you

Don’t get screwed as you figure out finances

22 TEENS TAKE ACTION

Local teens make change happen

37 READERS REACT

What’s the very first big-ticket item you bought on your own?

39 AGES + STAGES: 0–18

Out + About

24 M ARCH CALENDAR

What to do around the Sound

31 2 0 FREE (OR ALMOST FREE)

MARCH ADVENTURES

Got Your Sh*t Together Yet? Here’s a checklist for your family’s financial health

Fill March with fun without spending much money

JOHN-CORNICELLO

43 CUT THIS OUT

Help your kids be financially literate

46 SOMEONE YOU SHOULD KNOW

Meet Pwint Htun An engineer changes lives in Myanmar

GUIDE INSIDE

18–19 B irthdays 26–33 C amps, Arts + Activites 34–35 M ontessori Schools 42–47 S chools + Preschools

DENNIS DOW

Summer!

Advertising Sections

parentmap.com • March 2018 • 5

news

News Around Town

Microsoft features Mercer Island school

Northwest Folklife builds a better neighborhood

French? The folks over at the French

Children’s Festival, you know both are fun-filled events that

American School of Puget Sound (FASPS)

bring together some of Seattle’s biggest organizations. This year

First off, how cool is it that the Special

can tell you. The Mercer Island-based

will be no different. The theme of the 2018 Children’s Festival is

Olympics are coming to Seattle?! The

school got a nod from Microsoft for the

“Celebrating Our Big Neighborhood” — part of Northwest Folklife’s

once-every-four-years showcase of

school’s use of technology in and out

Youth and Family year-round initiative, Our Big Neighborhood.

athletic talent will be held in venues

How do you say “we speak tech” in

of class. One way FASPS does this: Give

If you’ve ever been to the Northwest Folklife and its Seattle

The initiative aims to harnesses the varied cultures, generations

10,000 volunteers needed for Special Olympics

in and around Seattle July 1–6. And

teachers Lenovo ThinkPads and students

and backgrounds of our area to “foster the exchange of

the Games need your help! As of

Surface Pros. The devices arrive set in

traditional and evolving cultures.” The goal: Promote greater

publishing, the Special Olympics need

English until FASPS students change them

social understanding through intergenerational and multicultural

10,000 volunteers to make it all go.

to the language of their choice. C’est

exchange. In other words, let’s get to know (and appreciate) our

Learn more at parentmap.com/special-

excellent, non?

neighbors.

olympics.

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Please join us each month as we promote, support and learn about an extraordinary local nonprofit. We will highlight the good works of organizations that strive to improve the lives of families and invite you to join us in giving precious time or money.

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2018

6 • March 2018 • parentmap.com

Founded in 1921, Amara works to improve the lives of children in foster care. They’re based in Columbia City and have an office in Tacoma, too. Recently, numerous local groups joined forces to support children in foster care by donating heaps of gifts, including clothes, toys and more. The goal: Create a better path for kids in foster care. amaraputskidsfirst.org Volunteer: amaraputskidsfirst.org/get-involved/volunteer Donate: amaraputskidsfirst.org/get-involved/make-adonation

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note

Got a little bundle of bills? goes by in the blink of an eye” is the cliché that young parents hear “ twhen they’re suffering what seems to be interminable sleepless nights

in those early years of a growing family. Well, I’m here to tell you, that

cliché is true. As I write this note, my last little beautiful baby and “bundle of bills” is walking around Boston on her first college tour. I was likely the only mama visibly weeping (my daughter Maya is used to this) in the info session. I do know there were dozens of dry-eyed parents with giant lumps in their throats thinking, “How did my baby grow up so fast?” Our readership represents every imaginable and beautiful definition of family. What they all have in common: the need to have food on the table, a secure place to live and love to carry us through it all. Making ends meet is a big part of that. This issue offers a series of money-focused solutions for families (or, as we put it on p. 39, how to get your sh*t together when kids enter the picture). In my own family, my husband is my perfect counterbalance. He’s, shall we say, less whimsical about money. I know part of his more conservative approach to spending and saving is wanting less tension and anxiety for our family. In support of low financial stress, we’ve sprung into spring with free adventures (p. 31). Your family will be inspired to forage in our forests, roller skate, visit baby sloth bear twins or bike the Arboretum. You’ll also meet the inspiring Pwint Htun, whom I recently met during a yoga retreat. Pwint, pictured with her physician mother (p. 46), helped build communications lifelines for families in her native Myanmar. So, whatever your family’s situation, we welcome you to our March issue. We hope you find a piece of financial inspiration to carry you into the sunnier season. 8 • March 2018 • parentmap.com

ParentMap

March 2018, Vol. 16, No. 3 PUBLISHER/EDITOR Alayne Sulkin

Life is full of firsts.

EDITORIAL

ASSOCIATE EDITOR Elisabeth Kramer OUT + ABOUT EDITOR

Nancy Chaney

Take your first step in saving for college today.

OUT + ABOUT ASSISTANT Jessica Plesko PROOFREADER Sunny Parsons CONTRIBUTORS Gemma Alexander, Jody Allard, Sarah Walker Canon, Malia Jacobson, Jessica Murphy Moo

PARENTMAP.COM DIGITAL MARKETING MANAGER

Lindsey Carter

PUBLISHING ASSISTANT

Nicole Persun

SOCIAL MEDIA STRATEGIST

Diana Cherry

Connecting parents to build a loving community of families of color JOIN our FOCS Parent Groups, monthly events and resource sharing Register and Info at focseattle.com

ADVERTISING SALES + PARTNERSHIPS MANAGER, ADVERTISING SALES AND PARTNERSHIPS

Dani Carbary, Ben Demar, Ida Wicklund AD OPERATIONS MANAGER Elisa Taylor

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ADVERTISING CLIENT SERVICES SPECIALIST

Jessica Collet

ADVERTISING BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT COORDINATOR Amanda Brown SALES ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT

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MARKETING/EVENTS EVENT OPERATIONS Tara Buchan EVENT + MARKETING COORDINATOR

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EVENTS ASSISTANT Zoe Bloom

ART + PRODUCTION DESIGN + PRODUCTION, PRINT MAGAZINE

Emily Johnson

PRODUCTION DESIGN

OPERATIONS MANAGER Carolyn Brendel ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT + DISTRIBUTION

Angela Goodwin

PARENTMAP EDITORIAL ADVISORY BOARD Benjamin Danielson, M.D.

ODESSA BROWN CHILDREN’S CLINIC

Joan Duffell COMMITTEE FOR CHILDREN John Gottman, Ph.D. THE GOTTMAN INSTITUTE PROFESSOR EMERITUS, UNIVERSITY OF WASHINGTON

Laura Kastner, Ph.D.

PSYCHIATRY + BEHAVIORAL SCIENCES, UNIVERSITY OF WASHINGTON

Bea Kelleigh

VICE PRESIDENT AT DOVETAILING, LLC

Yaffa Maritz, M.A.

LISTENING MOTHERS + COMMUNITY OF MINDFUL PARENTS

Ron Rabin THE KIRLIN FOUNDATION Daniel J. Siegel, M.D.

EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR, MINDSIGHT INSTITUTE ADVERTISING INFORMATION

206-709-9026 or advertising@parentmap.com Fax 206-709-9031 CALENDAR SUBMISSIONS

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all about baby Find Your Village Being a new parent can be really isolating, but baby, we’ve got your back. ALLI ARNOLD

Notes

From Recent Research to Gaga Gear

ICYMI: OUR

INTERVIEW WITH DR. DAN SIEGEL

parentmap.com/enews

is open, connecting, ready to learn and in many ways turning on the social-engagement system, which allows the whole body and the brain to learn and connect. So that’s where we thought we should write a book just about how

On Jan. 22, ParentMap was proud to

parents and other caregivers, including educators, can cultivate a “yes

partner with Dr. Dan Siegel on a

brain” experience for the children they help grow, develop and move

Facebook Live Q&A about his new

into life with this positive approach to life.

book “The Yes Brain.” Here are a couple of our favorite

You talk a lot about resilience in the book. What do you mean by

questions, and

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remember: We’re

First, you really need to think deeply

hosting Dr. Siegel

about balance: “How do I have a full

on April 30 for

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integrated?” … You can learn how to

What inspired you to write “The Yes

gone into a red zone of chaos or a blue

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The book was inspired by experiences my

an important part of balance and an

co-author [Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D.] and I

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had with parents telling us about kids these days feeling very anxious, very depressed and

Now resilience is how do you widen

very overwhelmed. In many ways, they were

that zone so that when life throws you

describing the experience of a threat state.

challenges, you aren’t thrown into the red zone or the blue zone? It’s also about

[That’s a similar state to what you get] when

how to get back to balance so that even

you say “no.” A “no” gets you ready to fight

when things are really, really tough, I

back or flee or tighten your muscles and

know how to bring myself back.

freeze or even feel helpless and faint. Those threat states of reactive “no brain” state are

Resilience is something you can learn; it’s

very different from a “yes brain” state, which

a skill … that can be learned by any child.

10 • March 2018 • parentmap.com

For That One Time You Get Out of The House Mark your calendars for the first Sunday in March. That’s the day the beautiful Seattle Japanese Garden traditionally holds its annual opening, including a Shinto blessing and kid-friendly performances. The garden’s a great place to take a stroll(er).

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feature

12 â&#x20AC;˘ March 2018 â&#x20AC;˘ parentmap.com

VOICE

How Becoming a Single Parent Improved My Finances ‘Living alone with my kids and financing our life alone, I created a sensible budget that met our needs’ By Sarah Walker Caron

n the darkest parts of night, when my kids slept peacefully in rooms nearby and my then husband snored somewhere in the house, the panic would set in. The thump-thump-thump of my racing heart made it feel like my chest would burst. My breath would catch. It felt like my world was crashing down around me, seeing fissures form in the glass facade of the carefully managed life I’d worked so hard to create. It was failure, loss of hope, fear and worry all bound together in a barbed wire parcel that I’d hold in my trembling hands. Numbers bounced around my head: the paychecks I was expecting, the bills I had to pay, the money I’d have left for gas, groceries and activities for the kids. Then there were the things we needed, wanted or otherwise should budget for. And what about savings? Would I ever have any again? On the worst nights, the only relief came in extracting those numbers into a document or onto paper. Columns of income versus expenses were the salve that slowed the panic. After my husband came to bed, I would get up, sometimes pacing, sometimes retreating to another room to make lists and compare my income to expenses. I’d then brainstorm ways to make more money, and I’d feel my breathing get closer to normal. More sponsored posts on my blog, more ad slots, more pitches for freelance work, more reaching out to contacts, more, more, more.

I’d keep at it — numbers, ideas, plans, emails — until my eyelids would droop and my head would bob with exhaustion. Only then could I sleep. There never seemed to be enough money, and I seemed to be the only one really feeling the pinch associated with keeping the status quo of our life. My concern — my constant concern — was how to give my kids a good life. How could I make the numbers work to do that? Each year, I’d earn more and more. Each year, it felt like I was so close to having my income be enough to live the life I wanted my kids to have. But each year, I also took on more financial responsibility for my family. And each year, I’d have nights like the ones I’ve described more often. It was never that my freelance career wasn’t successful. It was. But living in an expensive state in an expensive home that had long since become beyond our means, sending my kids to preschool (there was no public option), with expensive car loans I didn’t want and a second income that seemed to decrease each year ... it was all too much. And worse, it was thankless and lonely. There wasn’t a sense of “we’re in this together” in my marriage. We always kept our finances separate, and somehow that morphed into barely discussing them — beyond the occasional terse argument about the rare tax return I wanted to put toward bills and he wanted to spend. There wasn’t even

parentmap.com • March 2018 • 13

feature How Becoming a Single Parent Improved My Finances continued from page 13

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a feeling that we could lean on each other. Instead, it felt like one long, difficult business venture gone awry. Marriage should be more than that. It needs to be. Then a dream job in Maine — editor of the features section for Maine’s largest newspaper — appeared before me. I leapt. I had to. Something had to change. And it did. Everything did. First, the kids and I moved into an affordable rental near my job. It was the right size for us at the time, and in the area where I wanted to live. The separation from my husband, de facto at first and then intentional, was freeing. I could breathe again. I slept. The panic attacks subsided. Living alone with my kids and financing our life alone, I created a sensible budget that met our needs. Instead of a hefty cable bill, I opted for the simplest plan. Instead of shopping as a pastime, we started hiking and taking advantage of local events for families. Instead of a constant drone of television, we explored our world and tried new things. We could live within our means on my income — prioritizing needs like rent, electricity and food over wants like the newest gadget or video game on the market. But most importantly, the world seemed like a brighter, happier place. I guess I never grasped how unhappy I was until I was happy. Moreover, my family commented on how much happier my kids seemed, too. And then, finally, we divorced. Those sleepless nights are a distant memory now. I rarely find myself awake in the darkest hours. That’s one of the many reasons I know that changing our lives was for the better. (Other reasons: my growing savings account, my improved credit rating, my happy and involved kids, smiles and laughter in our house, my availability to volunteer in my community … it goes on and on.) In my mind, for a long time, the ideals of marriage — of a lasting commitment, of raising children together for a successful adulthood, of sharing in a life — were so important to me. But those were ideals, not the reality of what we were living, and ideals don’t make a marriage successful. The right two people together do — and we weren’t the right two people. Sometimes being independent is more important than living up to those ideals. Sometimes you have to accept that all the trying in the world can’t change the fact that a square peg and a round hole don’t fit together. Sometimes you have to accept a different reality in order to live a better life. My kids are happy. We live in a warm community where they are active in sports, arts and so many other activities. They’re learning about budgeting, saving money, setting goals and being selective about what they spend their money on. They’re watching me cut back to save for a house, prioritizing that over upgrading our car or buying a new laptop. They see their father regularly, too, because he moved to Maine as well. This wasn’t where I expected to be at 37, but it’s where I am, and I am happier for it. n

Sarah Walker Caron is an author, editor and freelance writer who lives in Maine with her two kids. She loves hiking, reading, theater and cooking. Her food blog, “Sarah’s Cucina Bella,” has been delighting readers since 2005.

Making Cents of Your Divorce

Keep your sanity — and financial stability — whatever your situation By Jody Allard

’ve been divorced three times (really). Each time, my financial stability suffered blows that took months — or even years — to recover from. But with each subsequent divorce, I learned a little bit more about how to protect myself and I rebounded faster. Thankfully, you don’t have to get divorced three times to learn these tricks. I spoke to lawyers, financial planners and other finance gurus to help you survive your divorce without losing your sanity — or your financial stability.

Start saving for your divorce before your divorce. Going through a divorce can be expensive, both financially and emotionally. Attorney fees, therapy, court fees and new living expenses add up, so it’s a good idea to start putting aside some funds to cover these costs. This might mean spending less and saving more, or putting some of your existing financial resources in reserve, depending on your situation. And while we might not think of emotions as “financial impacts,” they can affect your behavior and decisions, so it’s important to pay attention to how you and those around you — like your kids — are feeling and working through this change, says Monica Padineant, a certified financial planner and client adviser at Laird Norton Wealth Management in Seattle.

Be strategic about the timing of your divorce. The timing of the divorce is often overlooked. If you or your spouse is expecting a large bonus from work or other large monetary distribution in the near future, those would be considered a community property asset if you’re still married when they’re paid out, Padineant says. Another example is that someone who’s been married for more than 10 years may be eligible to receive Social Security benefits on their spouse’s earnings.

“Of course, no one should stay in a bad situation simply for the money,” says Padineant. “But if the divorce is amicable, it might be worth waiting if financial considerations like these can ease the transition.”

Start a budget. If you’re in a situation where there are two incomes, consider how a change of income is going to impact how you live. The parent who takes on primary custody usually carries more of the financial burden when it comes to the kids. If you’ll only have your income or a spousal maintenance payment going forward, look at what you need to keep the household going, the kids engaged in their lives and everyone maintaining a healthy life. You might need to cut some expenses, but focus on what’s most important before making dramatic changes. Start building a budget so you know how much is spent on household expenses, food, clothing, transportation and especially how much is spent for the kids. This will help a judge determine how much, if anything, should be given in spousal or child support, Padineant says.

Document everything. Put together a net worth statement that lists your assets and liabilities and start gathering financial records. Make sure you account for all your property and whether it’s separately or jointly owned as this will help in the discussion of who gets what. Also review the contents of any safe-deposit boxes. Examples of financial records that will be required: bank statements, investment account statements, credit card and loan statements, pay stubs and income tax returns. And review your tax returns that have been filed jointly or separately by your spouse, and make sure all taxes have been paid to date, says Padineant. >> parentmap.com • March 2018 • 15

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feature Making Cents of Your Divorce continued from page 15

Keep your emotional spending in check. Don’t allow your emotions let you do anything rash. Avoid making large purchases or creating additional debt that might cause financial hardship later on. Don’t make major decisions, such as quitting your job. Consult your attorney before moving out of your house. And don’t give away assets that are jointly owned. “Divorce can be a confusing time,” Padineant says. “Try not to make it more complicated.”

ADOLESCENCE ISN’T EASY. HAVING SOMEONE TO TALK TO CAN HELP.

Consider tax implications in your settlement. If in the divorce settlement you receive assets from a 401(k), you have the option of specifying in a qualified domestic relations order (QDRO) how you want to receive those assets. A QDRO allows you to take money out of the 401(k) penalty -free even before age 59 and a half, and then everything else can be rolled into an individual retirement account (IRA). This can be a good way to get access to some cash that you can use to make the transition to the next stage of your life, Padineant says.

IS IT ADD? OR SOMETHING ELSE?

Negotiate everything now. To avoid future legal battles, you must be very clear in your agreement. For example, make sure that payments to be made are clearly delineated with dates, amounts and methods for how collections will be made. In addition to basic child support, parents may divide the payment of expenses often referred to as “add-on” expenses. Add-on expenses may consist of medical, health, therapeutic, dental, orthodontic, extracurricular (such as camp) and childcare expenses. Because these expenses vary month to month and sometimes can be open to interpretation, they’re likely to be the most litigated area. “Be sure to have strong default language in the agreement for nonpayment and a provision about legal fees if there is a default,” says Lisa Zeiderman, an attorney who specializes in family law and is also a certified divorce financial planner. “Don’t put in provisions that prohibit litigation or create a condition precedent that has to be fulfilled before you can get into court.” The state provides what is essentially a collection agency to collect support on a monthly basis. Requesting that child support be enforced by the state at the time of the initial settlement — no matter

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Sure, sure, we know Angry Birds may not be the latest in tech but if you’ve still got a fan in the house, consider celebrating all things Angry Birds by shaking your tail feathers at an Angry Birds-themed bash. Whether it’s for a “birdsday” or any old day, you’re bound to go coo-coo for these festive ideas. And we promise — they’re not for the birds. First, set up a life-sized Angry Birds game that includes a giant homemade slingshot! Using cardboard boxes that have been decorated to look like cement and wooden blocks, this neat homemade course offers up hours of fun for pint-sized party-goers. (You can make a mini-version for the cake, too. We’ve got an easy recipe for an interactive birthday treat that also includes a slingshot. Check out the link below.) Another idea: Craft a homemade festive piñata. It only takes a handful of supplies, including paste, a balloon, newspaper strips and construction paper for the outer features. Want more ideas? Get inspired at parentmap.com/angry-birds

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Making Cents of Your Divorce

Charles The Clown Charles The Magician

continued from page 17 how amicable the divorce seems — removes the emotional aspect of arguing over child support. It also provides for enforcement services such as garnishment if the payer refuses to pay (even years down the line). After the divorce is final, Zeiderman cautions parents not to make side deals about money. Stick to the agreement or have an addendum drafted, she urges.

Don’t forget the college years — even if your kids are toddlers. The court has the authority to order a parent to pay college expenses, says Zeiderman. Returning to court is costly and stressful, so parents should consider how they plan to pay for college during their divorce — no matter how young their kids are.

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Protect your credit score. With a smaller income after a divorce, it’s often harder to get credit (if it’s not already harmed through the divorce process). A good divorce attorney will try to get in front of credit issues by reviewing credit reports and removing a spouse from accounts where permissible, says Devon Slovensky, a family law attorney. The parent who keeps the marital home will generally have to refinance, so maintaining credit is an important part of the divorce process, she adds.

If you have an international spouse, consider the immigration impacts. If you sponsored your international spouse, you made a promise to the U.S. government not to let that person fall into poverty. Even if the relationship fails, the sponsoring spouse is still on the hook for this obligation. “It could last until either party dies,” Slovensky says. “[Your] child turning 18 has no bearing on it. In fact, if a stepchild was sponsored in the immigration process, there could be an ongoing obligation to the stepchild as well.” Divorce is difficult, but getting ahead of your finances can reduce some of the stress for you and your kids. But long before a divorce is on the horizon, you can take steps to “divorce-proof ” your finances simply by making sure you’re an involved partner. “It is my personal belief that people do not pay enough attention to their money. Do not depend on someone else to take care of you,” Zeiderman says. “When the divorce comes, you will have to take care of you. Money is power, so don’t place yourself in a less than powerful position.” n Jody Allard is a former managing editor of ParentMap.

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While divorce is difficult for everyone, women are particularly vulnerable to financial disruption. Studies reveal that in the first year after divorce, the wife’s standard of living may drop almost 27 percent, while the husband’s may increase by as much as 10 percent. Quite simply, to escape becoming a depressing divorce statistic, women need to avoid getting screwed in divorce. I spoke to Wall Street veteran Carla Dearing, founding CEO of Sum180, an online financial wellness service, about the mistakes women make and how they can protect themselves.

Mistake no. 1: Letting your emotions determine your path. Money is always emotional, but divorce amplifies this reality many times over. This is probably the time when you are least able to sort through the necessary decisions easily, but you need to make careful decisions now — your long-term financial health depends on it. Rushing into a divorce settlement because you just want to get it over with can spell the difference between a secure retirement and a strained one. What to do instead: Reach out to a trusted friend for advice. A friend or family member with your best interests at heart can lend you the clarity and energy for the next steps you need to tackle. Share a glass of wine, talk, cry and accept the support you need. If your friend has been through a divorce herself, she may even recommend a great divorce attorney or divorce financial planner. If so, listen up! With your emotions all over the map, you need trusted advisers to guide you toward decisions that honor your priorities and align with your long-term goals.

Mistake no. 2: Failing to understand your financial picture. Some women get into the habit of letting their spouses handle the family finances, or of compartmentalizing the family finances so that while you may be expert in one area (e.g., your household accounts), you are out of the loop in others (e.g., a family business). You can’t arrive at a fair settlement if you don’t have a clear and comprehensive picture of your financial situation. What to do instead: Start getting up to speed on your financial picture right away. First, make sure you have access to all bank and investment account passwords and documents, as well as your recent tax returns. Check your credit reports for discrepancies. This may feel overwhelming. Fortunately, educating yourself about your finances doesn’t have to be something you

tackle alone. Once you have gathered all your financial statements, your financial planner can help you organize and interpret this critical data.

Mistake no 3: Accepting your spouse’s word about family assets. You may be tempted to check out mentally, but you will get much closer to a fair settlement by staying attentive, engaged and, above all, skeptical. What to do instead: Demand financial documentation. Even if the negotiations are proceeding amicably, don’t simply believe everything your spouse says about their finances. Verify the facts independently and document everything. Pay close attention to your spouse’s lifestyle and spending habits. If you suspect your spouse is being less than forthcoming about their income or assets, immediately ask your lawyer for advice. Your lawyer may recommend consulting a forensic accountant to uncover your spouse’s assets. You may also be able to force your spouse to produce financial documentation in court.

Mistake no. 4: Clinging to the family home.

Many women feel they need to keep the house because they’ve lived there for years and it represents home for the kids. This impulse is

understandable, but now that your financial landscape is about to change (perhaps drastically), it’s not necessarily wise. What to do instead: Do the math, then be brutally honest with yourself. Will you have enough future income to maintain the house? Remember, maintaining the house means more than paying the mortgage; it means covering utilities, upkeep and repairs. Once you set aside your emotional attachment to the family home, you may realize that moving to a smaller home or condo is best.

Mistake no. 5: Focusing on petty property battles rather than the big picture. As you take inventory and divide assets, it’s easy to get caught up in battles over relatively minor possessions, such as furniture or memorabilia. This sucks up time and energy that you and your lawyer should be spending on bigger items, like spousal maintenance, child support or the house. What to do instead: Be a savvy negotiator. Be willing to compromise on nonessentials, and save your legal and emotional resources for battles that will make a real difference in your long-term financial well-being. n Jody Allard is a former managing editor of ParentMap.

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Meet Kelly Chen

Local teens make change happen By Elisabeth Kramer

hances are good that you’ve heard of the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation. From poverty to health to education, the foundation and its partners are working to improve the lives of billions of people What you might not know: They’re hoping to inspire the next generation of changemakers, too. Every month this year, we’ll profile one teen from the Seattle area who is making a difference in their community. Some of the teens featured are involved in the Gates Foundation Discovery Center’s Youth Ambassadors Program (YAP), a year-long service learning program for high school students designed to educate, engage and empower youth. These teens have their sights set on a better, brighter future. Learn how the Gates Foundation Discovery Center is helping them get there and how you can, too. This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity and length.

Who am I?

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I’m Kelly Chen. I’m 16 and a sophomore at Foster High School in the Tukwila School District. I first heard about the Gates Foundation Discovery Center during my freshman year of high school when I saw a call for applications for the Teen Action Fair. I decided to apply for it along with a group that I joined in middle school, the Race and Equity Committee. The committee started when I was in middle school; a bunch of English and social studies teachers had discussed founding it and I was part of the initial group of students who joined. We participate in [school] district and [school] board meetings, discuss current Sponsored by:

At the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation, we believe all lives have equal value. We are impatient optimists working to reduce inequity. Explore interactive exhibits and find ways you can take action at DiscoverGates.org • #TeenActionFair • Next to Seattle Center • 440 5th Ave. N.

22 • March 2018 • parentmap.com

the Gates Foundation Discovery Center, discovergates.org

events and attend workshops that explore social justice topics. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve since started the committee on the high school level. The goal is to provide a safe space for people to voice their opinions. For the Teen Action Fair last year, I also submitted a project that was about freedom â&#x20AC;&#x201D; how we define it and what privileges we each have. As part of the project, I did something called a privilege walk. Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a group activity where you have a list of privileges and, as theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re read out, you either take a step forward or take a step back depending on if you have that privilege.

â&#x20AC;&#x153; It really starts off with talking about the issues or about what you want to see changed in the world.â&#x20AC;?

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What Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m up to The Gates Foundation invited me to participate in the Teen Action Fair again this year [editorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s note: The fair is scheduled for March 24]. It brings together a bunch of different organizations, both big and small, in and out of school, and they present what they do and how to help the community. Some have activities, presentations or even games. Last year, we had a poster board where we presented what our committee does. This year, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re going to discuss our club, of course, but weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re also probably going to host an activity where you can make a bracelet. Each different colored bead would represent a certain person whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s in your life. For example, I might say, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Pick the bead that best represents your significant other.â&#x20AC;? Then, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d pick a bead that coordinates to a certain race or gender or another aspect of that person. The completed bracelet helps you discover the diversity around you. I really enjoyed the fair last year. It was such a new experience; Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d never done something like that before. I was impressed by how many people came up and said, â&#x20AC;&#x153;I really want a race and equity team at my school. How do I do this?â&#x20AC;? So Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m really excited for this year.

Want to get involved, too? What I recommend

â&#x20AC;&#x153; You may think that youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re a small individual student and you wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t make a difference but you will.â&#x20AC;?

Go for it. It really starts off with talking about the issues or about what you want to see changed in the world. You may think that youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re a small individual student and you wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t make a difference but you will. Those small changes add up. n Elisabeth Kramer is associate editor at ParentMap.

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Dino Days. Dino fans dig into paleontology and find clues from teeth, bones, poop and more. Saturday–Sunday, 10 a.m.–5 p.m. Included with admission. Burke Museum of Natural History and Culture, Seattle. burkemuseum.org Making Tracks. Learn how to find signs of animals all around you in this ranger-led program. March 4, 17 or 25; 2:30–3:30 p.m. FREE; RSVP. Ages 5–10 with families. Lewis Creek Park, Bellevue. parks.bellevuewa.gov

SOTAbots Robotics Team Visit. Learn all about awesome robots from the students who build them. First Monday of the month through May, 4–5 p.m. Included with pay-what-you-will admission. Children’s Museum of Tacoma. playtacoma.org Low Sensory Play Time. Calmer play time with fewer kids. Mondays, noon–2 p.m. and select other days. $20; preregister. Ages 0–10 with adult. Roo’s World of Discovery, Kirkland. roosworldofdiscovery.com ONGOING EVENT

PEPS Benefit Luncheon. Gather with other PEPS parents to support a beloved community organization. Donations requested; preregister. 11 a.m.–1 p.m. Fisher Pavilion at Seattle Center. peps.org Math Buddies. Elementary students meet with teen volunteers for math games and activities. Tuesdays, 4–5 p.m. FREE. Grades K–5. Seattle Public Library, West Seattle Branch. spl.org ONGOING EVENT

Tacoma Resident Free Day at PDZA. Rare weekend chance for free zoo entry for Tacoma residents. 9:30 a.m.–4 p.m. FREE for Tacoma residents with proper I.D. Point Defiance Zoo & Aquarium, Tacoma. pdza.org Seattle Family Dance. Grab a partner, little or big, and learn fun line and square dances with live music. 2:30–4:30 p.m. $7/ person or $20/family. Ages 10 and under with families. Phinney Neighborhood Center, Seattle. seattledance.org

Boardwalk Stroll at Shadow Lake Bog. Go on a self-guided, half-mile walk through this fascinating bog preserve. Daily during daylight hours. FREE; donations accepted. Shadow Lake Nature Preserve, Renton. shadowhabitat.org Agents of Discovery. Wander the trails on your mission to learn about nature with this free smartphone app. Complete your mission for a prize! Monday–Saturday, 9 a.m.–4 p.m. FREE (loaner phones available). Tacoma Nature Center. ONGOING EVENT

State Parks Free Day. Explore our spectacular state parks FREE today in honor of our state park system’s 105th birthday. No Discover Pass required. Statewide. discoverpass.wa.gov Maker Monday. Experiment with 3D modeling and try out the 3D printer. Mondays, 1–5 p.m. $5; printing material extra; preregister. Makers under 15 must bring an adult. Future of Flight Aviation Center, Mukilteo. futureofflight.org ONGOING EVENT

Detective Cookie’s Chess Club. Drop in to learn and practice chess skills; new members always welcome. Tuesdays, 3–5 p.m. FREE. Ages 7 and up. Seattle Public Library, Rainier Beach Branch. spl.org ONGOING EVENT The Gift of Failure. Best-selling author Jessica Lahey offers practical tips on how to step back and encourage kids to take charge of their learning and motivation. 7 p.m. $20. Adults. Mercer Island High School. miparentedge.org

French Fest. Festál celebrates diverse French-speaking cultures from around the world with live music, dance performances and activities for kids. 11 a.m.–6 p.m. FREE. Seattle Center. seattlecenter.com/festal Bricks Cascade. Take a trip south to thrill your Lego fans of all ages; this expo has blocks to play with, impressive builds to view and vendors galore. Saturday–Sunday, March 24–25. $11; ages 2 and under free. Oregon Convention Center, Portland. brickscascade.com

Kid Jump. Exclusive time for littles to jump without crazy big kids flying around. Monday–Saturday, 9–10 a.m. $13 ($3 grip socks required); accompanying adult free. Ages 6 and under. Flying Circus, Tukwila. flyingcircus.us ONGOING EVENT Hoppy Hour. Bounce time for energetic kids to get the rainy day (or any day) wiggles out. Monday–Friday, 10 a.m.–12:30 p.m. $6–$9. Ages 1–8. Elevated Sportz Trampoline Park, Bothell. elevatedsportz.com ONGOING EVENT

Toddler Gym. Tot play times at Seattle’s neighborhood community are now free. Monday–Saturday, various times. FREE. Ages 5 and under with caregiver. Seattle. seattle.gov/parks ONGOING EVENT Play to Learn. Kids and caregivers gather for community play and circle time around a weekly theme. Tuesdays, 10 a.m.; additional weekly times and locations online. FREE. Ages 6 and under with adult. Puyallup Public Library. playtacoma.org

Caspar Babypants. Jam with beloved indie-turned-kindie rocker and snack on delicious doughnuts. FREE; doughnuts for purchase. 10:30 a.m. Top Pot Doughnuts, Bothell. babypantsmusic.com Pete the Cat. Pete jumps into a new adventure of friendship that is sure to delight. Noon sensory-friendly (free) and 2 p.m. regular performance. $15. Ages 4–8 with families. Everett Civic Auditorium. villagetheatre.org

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Spanish Playgroup. Drop-in for games, stories, songs and community en español. Tuesdays, 10–11:30 a.m. FREE; ages 0–5 with caregiver. FamilyWorks, Seattle. familyworksseattle.org ONGOING EVENT Kitty Literature. Kids practice reading skills with a supportive audience of shelter cats during a 20-minute session. Monday– Friday, times vary. FREE; preregister. Ages 5–10. Seattle Humane Society, Bellevue. seattlehumane.org ONGOING EVENT

THURSDAY

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Toddler Story Time at The Wing. Enjoy stories with Asian characters or authors followed by a simple art activity. 11 a.m. Included with admission. Ages 1–4 with families. Wing Luke Museum, Seattle. wingluke.org Mine, Craft, Build and Play! Tinker and build online and in real life with a multitude of materials. 3:30–5 p.m. FREE. Ages 3–13 with families. Lakewood Pierce County Library. piercecountylibrary.org

Polar Science Weekend. Pet polar bear fur, try on a survival suit and investigate the properties of ice. Friday–Sunday, March 2–4. Included with admission. Pacific Science Center, Seattle. pacificsciencecenter.org Emerald City Comic Con. Introduce your kids to local pop culture geeky greatness. Thursday–Sunday, March 1–4. $30–$40; ages 5 and under free. Washington State Convention Center, Seattle. emeraldcitycomiccon.com

ParentMap North Camp Fair. Browse oodles of summer camp options and ask questions of camp providers. 10 a.m.–1 p.m. FREE; RSVP. Shoreline Community College. parentmap.com/campfair MoPOP’s Sound Off! Finals. Final remaining under age-21 local bands compete for the title. 7 p.m. $10–$14. All ages. Museum of Pop Culture, Seattle. mopop.org

John Gottman, Ph.D. on The Science of Healthy Relationships. Nurture intimacy with your spouse and create a loving environment for your family. 7 p.m. $25–$30. Adults. Temple De Hirsch Sinai, Seattle. parentmap.com/lectures Free Admission at Renton History Museum. Learn about some of the earliest inhabitants of the Renton area and lots more at this museum housed in an art deco firehouse. FREE. 10 a.m.–4 p.m. Renton. rentonwa.gov

Critter Club. Stories, hands-on exploration and an animal surprise. March 8–9, 22–23; 11 a.m. $13–$15; preregister. Ages 3–5 with caregiver. Point Defiance Zoo & Aquarium, Tacoma. pdza.org Stories Alive. Kids become a part of the story “Duck on a Bike” at this interactive story time. 11:30 a.m. and 2:30 p.m. Included with admission. Ages 1–6 with families. Imagine Children’s Museum, Everett. imaginecm.org

Visit Old McDebbie’s Farm. Explore the Eye Spy trail, play area, exotic and domestic animals; plus ride a pony, visit a wallaby or catch a fish for an extra fee. Friday–Sunday, 10 a.m.–6 p.m. $8 farm entry. Spanaway. oldmcdebbiesfarm.net March of the Dogs. Learn all about where dogs came from and explore the park; well-behaved dogs welcome. 10–11 a.m. FREE; preregister. Lake Hills Greenbelt Ranger Station, Bellevue. bellevuewa.gov

Kent Kids’ Arts Day. Kids tap into their creative juices trying out a ton of super-cool, hands-on art projects. 10 a.m.– 4 p.m. $10; ages 2 and under free. Kent Commons. kentwa.gov Lacey Ethnic Fair. Music, art, dance, food, crafts and fun celebrating traditions from around the world. 10 a.m.–6 p.m. FREE. St. Martin’s University, Lacey. ci.lacey.wa.us

Conservatory Story Hour. Stories and crafts amid the verdant surroundings. 11 a.m. Suggested donation $3. Ages 3–8 with caregiver. W.W. Seymour Botanical Conservatory, Tacoma. seymourconservatory.org KIS Farm Animal Tour. Goats, pigs, chickens — oh my! Learn about and interact with the animals at this urban organic farm. 2:30–3:30 p.m. $10; preregister. Ages 3 and up. KIS Farm, Redmond. kidsfarm.com

20 Under 20. Inspire your Picasso with this special exhibit of youth artists ages 13–19 and check out the imagination stations while at the museum. Wednesday–Sunday, through April 8. Included with admission. Bellevue Arts Museum. bellevuearts.org Park in the Dark. Learn all about nocturnal creatures on a guided night hike. March 15 or 17; 7:15–8:45 p.m. $15; preregister. Ages 5–12 with adult. Washington Park Arboretum, Seattle. botanicgardens.uw.edu

Tots Welcoming Shabbat. All welcome to share singing, prayer, challah and juice in a joyful environment. Fridays, 11:15 a.m.–noon. FREE. Ages 0–5 with caregiver. Temple B’Nai Torah, Bellevue. templebnaitorah.org ONGOING EVENT FREE Admission Night at Imagine. Relax at the end of the week with free family play time. 5:30–9 p.m. FREE. Ages 1–12 with families. Imagine Children’s Museum, Everett. imaginecm.org

St. Patrick’s Day Parade and Irish Festival. Get your green on and celebrate Irish pride; any heritage welcome. 12:30 p.m. FREE. Parade along Fourth Ave. toward Seattle Center, where Irish Fest takes place (Saturday–Sunday). irishclub.org Family STEAM Day. Take on a scientific, automotive project or challenge during this third Saturday family exploration. 11 a.m.– 4 p.m. p.m. Included with admission. LeMay – America’s Car Museum, Tacoma. americascarmusuem.org

Play with Paint. Time to let the kids get messy with paint at KidsQuest (not at your house). First and third Wednesdays, 2–3 p.m. Included with admission. Ages 0–12. KidsQuest Children’s Museum, Bellevue. kidsquestmuseum.org ONGOING EVENT Toddler Time at ESC. Join your toddler and Environmental Science Center naturalists in seasonal nature activities. 10:30–11:30 a.m. FREE; preregister. Ages 2–4 with families. Seahurst Park, Burien. envsciencecenter.org ONGOING EVENT

Tugboat Story Time. Board a real tugboat for fun and stories of the sea. Second and fourth Thursdays of the month, 11 a.m.–noon. FREE. Ages 1–8 with caregiver. Center for Wooden Boats, Seattle. cwb.org ONGOING EVENT Family Nature Class. Explore the natural world with learning stations and a trail walk. Thursday, Saturday; 9:30–11:30 a.m. $19 per adult/child pair; preregister. Ages 2–5 with adult. Washington Park Arboretum, Seattle. botanicgardens.uw.edu ONGOING EVENT

OmTots Play Gym. Enjoy active play time indoors and with other kids. Monday–Friday, 9:30 a.m.–noon. $12; discounts available. Ages 1–5 with caregiver. OmCulture, Seattle. omculture.com ONGOING EVENT Frog Hop. Venture into the dark to listen for the ribbits and songs of local frogs. 7–8:30 p.m. FREE; preregister. Ages 5 and up. Lewis Creek Park Visitor Center, Bellevue. parksreg.bellevuewa.gov

Moisture Festival Comedy/Varieté. Musicians, acrobats, comedians and can’t-be-categorized performers present amazing variety shows. March 15–April 8. $11–$26. Most shows all ages; see website. Hale’s Palladium, Seattle. moisturefestival.com Lil’ Diggers Playtime. Giant indoor sandbox. Monday, Wednesday, Thursday; 9:30–11 a.m. or 11:30 a.m.–1 p.m. $8. Ages 5 and under with caregiver. Sandbox Sports, Seattle. sandboxsports.net ONGOING EVENT

Indoor Playground. Tots play with push buggies, climbers, trikes and more. Tuesday, Thursday; 10 a.m.–1 p.m. $3. Ages 9 months–5 years with caregiver. North Kirkland Community Center. kirklandwa.gov ONGOING EVENT Talking to Your Kids About Race. Join Jasen Frelot of Kids and Race in this PEPS-sponsored workshop to help parents talk to their kids about race. 6:30 p.m. $10; preregister. Verity Credit Union Training Center, Seattle. peps.org

Family Skate Night. Test out your longlost roller skating skills and let the kids give it a go. Fridays through March 30, 6:30–8:15 p.m. $4, includes skate rental. All ages. Bitter Lake Community Center Annex, Seattle. seattle.gov/parks Mercer Slough Night Walk. Learn all about nocturnal animals in the lab, then head out for a guided night walk. 7–9 p.m. $15; preregister. Ages 6 and up with adult. Mercer Slough Environmental Education Center, Bellevue. pacificsciencecenter.org

ParentMap South Sound Camp Fair. Browse oodles of summer camp options and talk with local camp providers faceto-face. 10 a.m.–1 p.m. FREE; RSVP. STAR Center, Tacoma. parentmap.com/campfair Story Time and Crafts. Last chance this season for nature story and craft time. 1:30–3:30 p.m. FREE; preregister. All ages. Cedar River Watershed Education Center, North Bend. seattle.gov/util/crwec

31 Kindiependent Kids Rock Series. Rock out with popular group The Not-Its! whose music appeals to kids and adults alike. 10:30 a.m. $15 family ticket. Mount Baker Community Clubhouse, Seattle. mountbaker.org Spring Eggstravaganza. Scavenger hunt, petting zoo, bouncy house, crafts, face painting, treats and more. Noon–4 p.m. FREE. Redmond Town Center. redmondtowncenter.com

parentmap.com • March 2018 • 25

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Sunshine Music Together Weekly music class for children birth to age 5 & the grown-ups who LOVE them! www.sunshinemusictogether.com 206.281.1111 Queen Anne Montlake West Seattle Greenlake Lynnwood Redmond

The #1 Summer STEM Camp for Ages 7–18 Empower your child to take their STEM skills to the next level. From coding and game development to robotics and design, your child will develop in-demand skills and ignite lifelong passions—all within a fun, inclusive environment. Get ready for the best summer ever!

CAMPS & ACADEMIES

Held at 150 prestigious campuses UW | UW - Bothell | Bellevue College Eton School | U of Puget Sound

,JY F GWTHMZWJ FSI ƴSI F HFRU SJFW ^TZ iDTechCamps.com | 1-888-709-8324 parentmap.com • March 2018 • 27

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URJ CAMP KALSMAN

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A C T I V I T I E S

Make Summer Meaningful for the Whole Family Ah, the paradoxes of summer. We want it to be rich in uncomplicated fun — berry picking, beach hopping and backyard games. We want to chip away at that fabled summer bucket list. We also want to give kids the opportunity to explore interests that don’t fit into the jam-packed school year. And, of course, we still need to Get. Stuff. Done. Is it any wonder that summer in the Puget Sound region has a hard time living up to our outsize expectations? Here’s how a few planning and program gurus fight that old enemy procrastination. 1. Find a default camp. If your kids need to be in camps all summer, it can be tempting to hop among camps. Seattle parent coach Sarina Behar Natkin warns against the different-camp-every-week strategy, especially for younger kids. “It’s like starting a new job every week,” she says. “You have to figure out where you go to the bathroom, where you eat, who you ask for your help.” She recommends identifying one or two “home base” camps, a familiar option that offers fun, flexibility and lots of coverage.

The place for a summer of fun, friendships of a lifetime, and an unparalleled Jewish experience.

2. Find a special specialty camp. Once you’ve got the default camp, consider adding in a few specialty camps that your child is excited to try. The options can be overwhelming — rock climbing, fencing, archery, etiquette — so consider attending a local camp fair. (ParentMap offers four free Camp Fair events every February and March.) And when you find a specialty camp that really resonates with your kid, consider a repeat performance.

HWANG‛S TAEKW HWANG‛S TAEKWONDO Summer Camp HWANG‛S Cam TAEKW Summer HWANG‛S Summer Ca Summer Summ Get more summer planning tips at parentmap.com/summer-planning

—Elisa Murray

Camp HWANG‛S TAEKWONDO June 25th -25-Aug August June 30 www.hwangs.com

ww Camp June 18 – Summer hwangs.com www. August 24 3 – 14 years old June

Learning & Enrichment Outdoor Education Performing Arts Fine Arts Sports Day Camps m

25th - 2018 August 30th CAMP FAIRS www.hwangs.co 0318_hwangs_taekwondo_1-16.indd 1

Find registration information online: www.evergreenschool.org

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FREE

See page 38

parentmap.com/ campfair

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Summer Camps

Code! Game!

Learn!

www.CreativeCoding.com

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1/18/18 12:08 AM

summer camp

at Brighton School

Registration for Bellevue Parks & Community Services’ summer day camps is now underway!

New discoveries, great friends and fun times. Unique camps for ages 3–14. • Field trips • Sports & games • Arts, crafts & drama

• Engineering & design • Nature & science • Air conditioned building

21705 58th Avenue West • Mountlake Terrace, WA

brightonschool.com

866-537-4711

Don’t miss out on a summer packed with fun, adventure, variety, and value. Visit parks.bellevuewa.gov/camps to find your fun this summer!

425-452-6885 parks.bellevuewa.gov

parentmap.com • March 2018 • 29

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Explore More This Summer at SCM!

Seattle Children’s Museum’s Discovery Day Camp! 9:00am-4:00pm • Post-Care Available!

For more details, please visit www.thechildrensmuseum.org

July 9th-27th and August 6th-24th

Mention you found us in ParentMap and get a FREE camp t-shirt!

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Sports Arts & Science

2/14/18 10:43 PM

K-5th grade

July 23 - 27 & July 30 - August 3 9am - 3pm at Whale Tail Park • $225 summer_fun_camp@yahoo.com

Destination Science

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2/6/18 9:59 AM

The fun science day camp for curious kids!

Save $30/wk! Ends March 31st

Multiple King County Locations! destinationscience.org 888-909-2822 30 • March 2018 • parentmap.com

out + about

20 Free

(or Almost Free)

March Adventures

Fill March with fun without spending much money By Gemma Alexander Rain or shine, Northwest families will have a good time with these ideas. The best part? They’re cheap! We’re talking story times, movie nights and other free or not-too-pricey fun that will help families spring into the new season.

1. Dig in at Dino Days Burke Museum, Seattle March 3–4

overwhelming and are already on sale. $10 adults, $7.50 kids. Ages 2–10. >>

Hundreds of dinosaurs and fossils take over the whole museum for a prehistoric party. Meet Burke paleontologists and dig into hands-on activities. Timed tickets keep the crowds from becoming parentmap.com • March 2018 • 31

out + about 20 March Adventures continued from page 31

Free. Enjoy free popcorn and a free family-friendly indoor movie (TBA) on a large indoor screen. Bring the whole family along with bean bags, game chairs, pillows and anything else you need for comfortable lounging. All ages.

3. Add in fun at the Math Festival University of Washington March 10 Free. The Julia Robinson Mathematics Festival encourages kids to approach mathematical activities, games and puzzles with creativity and persistence at the University of Washington Husky Union Building (HUB). Ages 10–18.

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4. Kick it at Kent Kids’ Art Day Kent March 10

5. Celebrate the landing of St. Patrick South Lake Union March 16, 6 p.m.

6. Make the most of Moisture Festival Hale’s Palladium, Seattle March 15– April 8

Free. St. Patrick was brought to Ireland by pirates in about A.D. 400. Now, the Pirates of the Emerald Isle will deliver St. Patrick to South Lake Union (near the Museum of History & Industry) for the Green Stripe Laying, a mini parade to mark the route of the St. Patrick’s Day Parade down the center of Fourth

The Moisture Festival’s highenergy variety show features comedy and physical feats in

Kids create art projects all day for one flat fee at Kent Kids’ Arts Day at Kent Commons. Art supplies are included. You may bring a lunch or buy one. $10 per child. All ages.

A R T S

Summer Tech Adventures for Your Child Explore DigiPen’s ProjectFUN K-12 Summer Workshops in video game development, fine arts & animation, engineering, and music & sound design.

projectfun.digipen.edu 32 • March 2018 • parentmap.com

Avenue. A large crowd participates by riding the flatbed truck along the route. All ages.

•

MICHELLE BATES

2. Enjoy a family movie night Portland Avenue Community Center, Tacoma March 9

A C T I V I T I E S

Summer Music Day Camp

0218_red_gate_farm_1-8h.indd 1

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with

SEATTLE GIRLS CHOIR Full Day Camp

for girls entering grade 2-5 2 sessions: July 23-27 & July 30-Aug 3

Musical Morning July 30-Aug 3

for girls and boys ages 4-6

sea attlegiirlschoir.o org

Unexpected egg hunts near you Most of the Seattle-area community centers host egg hunts, and they’re reliably good fun. But if you’re looking for something bigger or a little different, check these out.

a unique combination of the styles of English music halls, European cabaret and American vaudeville, all accompanied by live music. Matinees are all-ages, evening shows welcome kids but may include some innuendo. $15–$25. All ages with parental discretion. More details at moisturefestival.com

7. Book it to Seattle Public Library’s book sale Exhibition Hall, Seattle Center March 16–18 Boost your kids’ academic potential and support your local library at the Seattle Public Library’s huge book sale. Admission is free, and books cost as little as $1, but we’ll understand if this ends up being the most expensive thing you do in March. All ages.

8. Spring clean the great outdoors Various locations, Tacoma March 17 Free. Get the whole family outside and lend a helping hand at a Tacoma Parks work party. Bring garden gloves and be ready to get dirty when you join volunteers at Point Defiance Beach, Oak Tree Park or McKinley Park for a spring cleanup. If you’re busy on March 17, check the parks calendar online; there are work parties throughout the month at different parks around the city. All ages.

9. Visit a state park Includes 140 Washington state parks March 19 Free. On this Washington State Parks’ Free Day, celebrate the 105th birthday of the state’s park system. You can picnic and play at any of the 140 Washington state parks for free. All ages. continued on page 36

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Woodland Park Zoo Bunny Bounce Seattle • March 31 Bring your own basket to the zoo, where egg hunts take place in age-divided heats, and treats are distributed on the way out (to avoid the risk of any zoo animals getting a taste of human candy or wrappers). Kids may be anxious to collect, but don’t miss out on watching the animals discover their own species-appropriate Easter baskets. Bunny Bounce activities are free with zoo admission or DENNIS membership. DOW Easter Egg Hunt in the Snow Crystal Mountain • March 31 This hunt is held on the grounds of Crystal Mountain, with more than 3,000 eggs to find and a prize basket for the finder of the Golden Egg. After the Easter egg hunt, get a photo with the Easter Bunny at the Inn Lounge. Flashlight Egg Hunt Mercer Island • March 31 After the littles have had their daytime fun, older kids take over at Mercerdale Park. No parents are allowed on the field during the after-dark, outdoor hunt for kids ages 7–12. $5 suggested donation.

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KidsQuest Egg-tastic Event Bellevue • March 25 Kids can collect eggs as they explore the museum, as well as participate in eggy art projects and perform scientific “eggsperiments,” such as floating eggs or building an egg maze. Preregistration is encouraged, as the event can sell out. $8–$14. Underwater Egg Hunt Covington • April 1 Participants hunt under and around the water for thousands of eggs filled with tokens for treasures. Two afternoon sessions take place in both the shallow and deep end of the pool during Covington’s unique swimming pool egg hunt. Additional games and activi-ties with prizes will be available. Preregistration recommended. Spring Eggstravaganza Redmond • March 31 Spring Eggstravaganza includes a kids’ scavenger hunt with prizes, a petting zoo (bunnies, chicks and goats), arts and crafts, games and other fun activities at Redmond Town Center. Attendance and most activities are free; food and some merchant activi-ties are available for purchase.

A C T I V I T I E S

Circus Arts Camps for ages 6-17 Acrobatics, Trampoline, Equilibristics, Aerial Arts, Tumbling, Object Manipulation, Flying Trapeze, & more!

www.sancaseattle.org

206-652-4433

SANCA is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit arts organization.

parentmap.com • March 2018 • 33

M O N T E S S O R I

S C H O O L S Small World Montessori

Easy Design Ideas Inspired by Montessori

Preschool at Maltby Elementary Preschool and Snohomish/Monroe

Make learning come alive with this DIY inspiration from Montessori schools. These ideas are great for your child’s bedroom, play area or even common spaces like the living room.

Kindergarten

Preschool and Kindergarten in in Everett/Mill Creek Everett/Mill Creek

Visit our website for more

To start, get a cool, low table. With all the learning going on, the kiddos are going to need a place to spread out. By providing that space, you create the ultimate project hub for the family. Next, try a movable alphabet. The alphabet allows children to create words using their imagination, focusing first on the way words sound. An essential for the Montessori home, we love that kids can truly immerse themselves in spelling and reading. After the fun, the letters and fabric fold up out of the way!

$50.00information off registration withto this ad. or call

schedule a Fall tour. Now Enrolling for 2014 Visit our website for more information or call to schedule a tour. www.smallworldmontessori.com 425-338-7771 www.smallworldmontessori.com 425-338-7771

Childhood Anxiety and

ADHD:

LM16_small_world_montessori_1-16.indd 1

A Whole Family Approach

APR 26

Bring in nature, too! In a Montessori home, everything has its place. Have your child set up their own spot for a beloved nature collection. Add a magnifying glass and let the scientific observations begin! See photos and get more ideas at parentmap.com/ montessori-design —Shar Petit

MONTESSORI SCHOOL OF SEATTLE

8/30/16 2:21 P

See pg 40

parentmap.com/ everychild Sign up

0318_every child_1-16.indd for a tour 1

2/18/18 11:10 PM 0316_mountain_valley_montessori_1-16.indd 1

on our website!

2/10/16 3:26 P

CALL NOW FOR A TOUR Academy Preschool/Elementary Early Education Infant-Toddler/Early Preschool

Organic meals

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The Sammamish Montessori School In Redmond m

Call 425-883-3271 for a tour.

Fostering a Child’s Love of Learning Educating Children 2.5 - 6 years since 1979 720 18th Ave. East - 206·325·0497 Montessorischoolofseattle.com 34 • March 2018 • parentmap.com

ͻ Child-centered, joyful atmosphere with strong academic focus ͻ ǆƉĞƌŝĞŶĐĞĚ͕ DŽŶƚĞƐƐŽƌŝͲĐĞƌƟĮĞĚ ƚĞĂĐŚĞƌƐ ͻ Preschool and kindergarten ͻ Family owned and operated since 1977 ͻ ^ƵŵŵĞƌ͕ ďĞĨŽƌĞ Θ ĂŌĞƌ ƐĐŚŽŽů ƉƌŽŐƌĂŵƐ ͻ WƌĞƉ WƌŽŐƌĂŵ͕ ;ƐƚĂƌƟŶŐ ĂŐĞƐ Ϯ ПШЖͲϯͿ

in g N o w E n r o ll

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M O N T E S S O R I Blue Skies Montessori School Inc The Sky’s The Limit To A Quality Education! 12 months to 6½ years

2808 SW Holden Street Seattle 98126

New Montessori Preschool in downtown Bellevue

206-938-9663

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English, Spanish, Japanese, Music, Art

blueskiesmontessori.org

pikakeschool.com • 425-453-1881

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S C H O O L S

NOW ENROLLING! Children 2.5-6 years Montessori based education for children 18 months to 6 years of age. 14044 NE 8th St, Bellevue 98007

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Empowering children and those around them to live in peace and service to the world.

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out + about

20 March Adventures continued from page 33

10. Celebrate a small-town Easter parade Snohomish March 31 Free. Billed as the state’s only Easter parade, the old fashioned Snohomish Easter Parade includes floats, bands, kids and farm animals moving down First Street in Snohomish. Be sure to wear your best bonnet; the parade is followed by an Easter bonnet contest. All ages.

11. Ride a bike Arboretum Loop Trail Free. March is a good time to break out the bikes and try the new 2.5-mile loop trail around the Washington Park Arboretum, which opened during the winter. With a 10-mph speed limit and relatively flat course, it’s a perfect, easy ride to get the family back in the saddle. Enjoy it now before warmer weather brings out the crowds. All ages.

12. Throw a party at the zoo Woodland Park Zoo

JEREMY DWYER-LINDGREN

Zoo admission isn’t exactly cheap, but it is a good value. Get even more for your money by pairing the Bunny Bounce egg hunt (see page 33) with a day

13. Forage the food forest Beacon Food Forest/ Swan Creek Park Food Forest Free. Volunteers work to maintain the urban food forest to share with the whole community. Visiting the forest and even gently harvesting the food for yourself is welcome. (March is hardly harvest season, but you might be surprised to find out what’s ready to eat in spring in a food forest.) Consider getting more involved. Kids are far more likely to eat food they helped to grow. Join Tacoma’s Swan Creek Park for a work party on March 18. All ages.

14. Go roller skating Various locations Roller skating is good exercise disguised as family fun. You can take it outside if it’s dry enough, but during this time of year when everything is usually damp and soggy, there are plenty of indoor options to keep warm and dry. Either way, everyone gets out of the house. Not sure where to go? Check out our guide to roller rinks around the Sound. $5–$10. Ages 3 and older. Get ideas at parentmap.com/rollerskate

15. Go natural(ist) Various locations Spring is a fun time to do a reasonably priced nature program at one of the local nature centers. Mercer Slough Nature Park has free guided ranger walks on select Sundays; rangers lead events at Lewis Creek Park; Seward Park Audubon Center has events for all ages; and the Children’s Garden at Magnuson Park hosts family nature walks. For something different, try a nighttime adventure with the Tacoma Nature Center’s Pier Peer programs. Program prices and recommended ages vary.

16. Take a hike Various locations of viewing zoo babies. Gorilla toddler Yola turned 2 in November, and this month Lulu the giraffe turns 9 (months), while the sloth bear twins turn 3 (months). $10–$15. All ages. 36 • March 2018 • parentmap.com

Free. The trails can be a muddy mess in March, but as they say, “There’s no such thing as bad weather, only bad clothes.” So, bundle up in waterproof duds and discover the wonders of early spring, when you’re almost guaranteed to have the trails to yourselves. All ages. Pick your hike at parentmap.com/out-about

17. Peek in at Pike Place Seattle Free. If you haven’t been to Pike Place Market in a long time, you might not realize what a familyfriendly place it has become, especially in the early spring, when the fresh flower and produce options are starting to pick up, but the tourists haven’t yet started to arrive en masse. See our online age-by-age guide to the Market for inspiration. All ages.

18. Ride the giant Ferris wheel Seattle Waterfront Depending on the weather, enjoy a bird’s-eye view or feel like you’re floating in a cloud inside the Seattle Great Wheel’s fully enclosed gondolas. Buy tickets online and print them at home sso you won’t even have to stand in line when you get there. $9–$14 (children younger than 2 ride for free). All ages.

19. Snag a story time Various locations Free. Both the King County Library and Seattle Public Library systems have numerous well-stocked branches with frequent story times and free family activities. Visit a new-to-you branch library or make a pilgrimage to the Central Library in downtown Seattle, where the children’s section is larger than some library branches. The kids will love riding the chartreuse escalators all the way to the vertiginous 10th floor.

20. Welcome ‘A Wrinkle in Time’ Everywhere (also, timeless) Prepare for the March 9 release of Disney’s highly anticipated adaptation of “A Wrinkle in Time” by Madeleine L’Engle by reading the book and watching the 2003 made-for-TV Canadian production. Don’t be surprised if the story sparks conversations about being yourself, the relative value of love versus intelligence or the nature of the space-time continuum. n Gemma Alexander is a Seattle-based freelance writer with two daughters. She blogs about books and travel and spends too much time on Twitter.

readers react The

Dan Siegel, M.D. APRIL 30

Q: What’s the very first bigticket item you bought on your own?

Miraculous Journey of Edward tulane

ADAPTED FOR THE STAGE BY DWAYNE HARTFORD BASED ON THE NOVEL BY KATE DICAMILLO

MARCH 16 - APRIL 1, 2018

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“Tickets to Paula Abdul when I was 11. The seats were horrid but the concert experience, which was my first major concert, was very memorable!” — Tara B.

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“I was a horse-crazy kid and begged my parents for one. After years of saying ‘no,’ they finally said I could get one, but only if I paid for everything myself. (I think they thought that would be a gentler way of saying ‘no’.) I saved up my allowance for a year and bought my horse for $100 the summer I was 14.” — Elisa Taylor, ParentMap ad traffic manager

2/18/18 11:10 PM

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“When I was 16, I bought a RCA 19-inch TV from [money I made at] my job at McDonald’s.” — Kim C. “A car! I remember how proud I was. Such a great feeling!.” — Jess Collet. ParentMap advertising client services specialist “Guns N’ Roses concert tickets. I had my own checkbook and it was the first time I wrote a check for over $100. I almost didn’t have space to write it out!” — Ida Wicklund, ParentMap advertising sales and partnerships manager “When I was 11, I saved up to buy a cross-country airline ticket to see my cousin (and bestie). It became an annual tradition. We’d take turns saving to make the trek each summer and we STILL do it to this day.” — Diana Cherry, ParentMap social media strategist “For Christmas one year, my sister and I chipped in to buy my dad a very cool, VERY new-fangled device: a DVD player. We still have the ‘How the Grinch Stole Christmas’ DVD it came with.” — Beth K.

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“A 10-speed bicycle.” — Laurie P. “A Mr. Potato Head at Bartells! Not big ticket, but it was to ME.” — Grace F.

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, cause parenting is a trip!

2018

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ages + stages

0–18

Got Your Sh*t Together Yet?

y her mid-30s, Lisa Olsen of Pierce County had checked off some of the milestones of adulthood: marriage, home ownership, parenthood. When her two kids reached preschool age, she and her husband decided they couldn’t put off the next one any longer: It was time to get their, ahem, docs in a row, financially -speaking. They hired a local attorney and dove into the estate-planning process, one that experts say too many new parents put off, and by doing so, they put their family’s long-term security at risk. There’s no way around it: Kids forever change family finances, from how you spend and save to your final wishes. But lots of new parents are too overwhelmed to make a plan, or worse, they postpone financial planning because they feel strapped, says certified financial planner Ali Criss of Financial Insights, a financial planning and investment management firm in Tacoma. The good news: A little effort goes a long way. And the payoff of peace of mind is priceless. If you’re waffling, confused or overwhelmed, you’ve got lots of company. And now, you’ve got a guide: We break down what you need to know at every stage. Read on for how to make 2018 the year you get your sh*t together.

Early years: Prep and plan After the arrival of a “little bundle of bills,” Criss walks new parents through a few essential steps. First, she says, parents need to create their estate-planning documents, including a will and power of attorney forms, or update the ones they have. These forms need updating after any big life change — marriage, new baby, divorce, death or major illness — and are usually crafted by an attorney. A financial pro can often recommend a few good lawyers in your area. And if you don’t already have life insurance, it’s time to start shopping. Life insurance pays cash to a surviving spouse and children if you die during the policy’s term. It comes in two basic varieties: term (a policy that ends after a pre-set term and pays nothing thereafter) and permanent (one that pays your survivors after you die, no matter how long you live). Term life insurance is a solid, straightforward choice for new parents. In most cases, coverage worth up to five times your annual income (a good benchmark, experts say) costs less than a meal out. Those with a child who may need long-term care may want to consider a permanent policy, which costs more but may provide more long-term security. >> parentmap.com • March 2018 • 39

ages + stages Got Your Sh*t Together Yet? continued from page 39 If you’ve already got life insurance, check the beneficiaries on the policies, and, while you’re at it, check those on retirement savings accounts, too. You may want all or a portion of the moolah to go to into a trust that your child will inherit as an adult, or to the person you’ve selected as your child’s legal guardian. These payouts can be some of the biggest assets parents should consider, and the recipient is determined by the beneficiary designation — not, as many assume, by your will, says Xan Gerson, an estate planning and probate attorney with Seattlebased Metis Estate Planning. You don’t need an attorney to make changes to your beneficiary designation; it usually involves just a phone call to the financial institution or insurance company where the account is held. However, an estate-planning attorney can help make sure you

get this done; parents who craft their own wills sometimes forget this important step, Gerson says. “I’ve seen cases where a parent has specified that assets go to certain people in their will, but the assets actually went to the people named as beneficiaries instead, even though this wasn’t what the parent wanted.” And you can’t escape the B word: It’s time for a budget, says Criss. “New parents should start visualizing how they’ll change their spending and saving post-kids. And a budget is an important tool.” Criss has personally used Mint (mint.com); other popular resources are BudgetPulse (budgetpulse.com) and YNAB, whose acronym stands for “You Need a Budget” (ynab.com). If you cringe at the thought of tracking every penny, take heart: After inputting your info and linking your bank accounts, budget software

streamlines month-to-month planning to give you a quick snapshot of your spending as well as ideas about where to pocket extra savings.

Elementary years: Good save By the time kids hit grade school, it’s time to start thinking about college savings, if you haven’t already, says Criss. This is when your budget know-how comes in handy, she says: If you’ve got a good handle on your spending, it won’t be too painful to set aside a small amount each month. If money is tight, don’t get bogged down in how much you can save. “It’s much more important to get in the habit of regularly putting aside money for college,” Criss says. “I have clients who save as little as $10 a month. The important thing is that it’s a habit.”

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Now, where to put that dough. Criss recommends 529 plans, “qualified tuition plans” sponsored by states or educational intuitions. These plans are tax-protected, meaning the cash grows tax free and won’t be taxed when withdrawn for educational expenses. (This year’s new tax legislation expands the scope of 529 plans, so funds can now be used for K-12 and private school expenses in addition to college.) Choosing a tax-protected plan can yield a bunch of extra cash for college. Saving $200 monthly for 18 years in a tax-advantaged plan nets an extra $14K for college, compared to a savings account without tax protection. And since funds can be used for schooling in any state, you don’t have to choose your state’s plan; the CollegeAmerica 529 savings plan is the country’s most popular.

yield a couple hundred dollars per month to put into your 401K or an IRA.

Tween and teen years: Big kids, big expenses Too often, Criss says, parents say they can’t save for retirement because they’re saving for their kids’ education, but that’s backward logic. Your child can get loans and scholarships for college, but you can’t do the same for retirement. “One day, your child will thank you for taking care of your own future,” she says. Saving about 10–15 percent of your income for retirement is a good benchmark, but individual goals and budgets vary. As with college savings, it’s better to build a habit of regularly saving a small amount than to skip it altogether. And cutting down on eating out by one meal each week can

Think babies are expensive? Try tweens and teens. It’s wise to get ahead of spending in one crucial area: health and dental care. Try a health savings account, or HSA. (HSAs are available to people with high-deductible insurance plans and allow you to set aside pre-tax dollars for medical and dental expenses; eligibility varies.) If you’re late to the college-savings game, there’s still time. If your child is already in high school, you may want to skip investment accounts, including 529 plans, and deposit funds into a regular savings account instead. Every teen should also be thinking

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Got Your Sh*t Together Yet? continued from page 41 about scholarships, says Criss. The scholarship search on BigFuture (bigfuture.collegeboard.org) is a good place to start; it lists scholarships from 2,200 programs worth a total of $6 billion. Worst case: It’s possible to shell out for college expenses in real time as kids work their way through higher ed. Check out the blog SmartDollar for insight on ways to make it work without derailing your own savings. The teen years are also a good time to build your child’s own financial savvy. Best-selling author and financial guru Dave Ramsey recommends setting up checking and savings accounts for your teen. (Your bank probably offers teen-specific options; locally, BECU’s Early Saver account is a popular option.) Also set up a monthly automatic transfer of the amount you’d normally spend on their various incidentals so they can get used to managing money. Resist the urge to rescue your spend-happy

teen when they come up short; their paying a few overdraft fees could offer a valuable, if costly, lesson in self-control. The takeaway: Getting your finances in shape isn’t as scary as it seems, says Criss. “I like people to think about small steps instead of this huge obstacle. Think about what you can do this month. If you don’t get it done this month, that’s OK. You can get back at it next month.” Lisa Olsen of Pierce County agrees. The biggest surprise about finalizing her estate plan was how easy it was, she says. “It was a phone conversation or two. Then we made an appointment to get everything signed. It was all very easy. And having the paperwork signed and knowing it’s all done and decided is a good feeling!” And that’s priceless. n

1 2

When your kids are ready to receive an allowance, talk to them about what housework you’d like them to do in exchange.

Decide between needs and wants

WHAT: Your “estate planning package” — which is legalese for the documents dictating your wishes about what happens to your offspring and assets if you die or become incapacitated due to illness or injury — includes your will and your power of attorney forms (documents that designate someone to make decisions for you if you’re unable to make them for yourself). At a minimum, you need two power of attorney forms: one to cover your financial affairs and one to cover your health care needs. Some attorneys also prepare a separate health care directive that specifies what you’d like your family to do if you’re in a permanent unconscious state.

Try playing a game with them in which you don’t buy the item and then see if they remember about it in a week.

WHERE: Head to an attorney’s office (the Avvo directory, at avvo.com, lists Seattle estate

$500–$1,000 for an attorney’s estate planning package.

Earn money

Trips to the grocery store are a great way to teach this. If you have time, do some quick comparison shopping between two different jars of pasta sauce.

Confused about communicating your final wishes? Join the club. Here’s advice from estate planning attorney Xan Gerson of Seattle.

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Introduce “the envelope system” to your children at an early age by designating separate envelopes for saving and spending toward something specific.

Spend wisely

Writing a Will 101

WHEN: Plan to update your estate planning documents after any major life change or every five years. If you’re creating a new estate plan with an attorney’s help, expect the process to take anywhere from a few weeks to a few months.

S ave for a goal

Malia Jacobson is a health and parenting writer who lives in Tacoma.

planning attorneys) or to an online service like LegalZoom. Do-it-yourself wills are easy to find online, but beware: They’re often cookie-cutter forms that don’t represent your state’s specific laws. For example, Washington law specifies that wills must be signed by two disinterested (read: not named in the will or affected by its outcome) witnesses. Skip this step, or another one of your state’s legal requirements, and the court won’t uphold your will, no matter how comprehensive.

Lessons to Teach Your Kids About Money

Create a savings jar specifically to donate to a cause they care about, or save up for a gift for a loved one.

Borrow responsibly

Offer to give them a loan for a bike or computer if they save up for half of the money on their own. Sit down and do some research together on how much something costs and the specifics of the “loan agreement.”

Write a Will

—Samantha Paxson

parentmap.com • March 2018 • 43

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1. Watch TV and ask questions. Books, videos on YouTube and TV shows are all great places to start talking to kids about empathy. Yes, many children’s programs today focus on kindness, but you don’t know if your children are receiving the intended message unless you ask them about it. easy way to instill empathy in a child is through their interactions with animals. Caring for an animal requires the acknowledgment that they have a need and you can provide it for them. Having a child become more active in caring for a family pet is a great way to help bring this concept to life.

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someone you should know

Pwint Htun

A Seattle-based engineer changes lives in Myanmar By Jessica Murphy Moo

s they fled Myanmar last year, many Rohingya refugees grabbed their solar panels. Why carry something so burdensome? A solar panel can charge a mobile phone — a direct lifeline to loved ones. Pwint Htun is largely responsible for getting that lifeline into the hands of Myanmar’s rural poor. Since 2012, the Seattle-based engineer and telecom executive has worked to bring mobile phone coverage to her native country. By and large, she has succeeded. In 2013, Myanmar was the third-least-connected country in the world (a SIM card alone cost $1,500 for terrible service, and that in only the more urban areas). Today, 83 percent of households have mobile phones, which can cost less than $25. Htun knows what a phone can do for a family. Her own family fled Myanmar for the ThailandCambodia border in the 1980s during a military crackdown on democratic protesters. (Her mother, a physician, had offered care to injured protesters, which government officials saw as an act of rebellion.) When she later moved to the U.S., Htun took a minimum-wage job at a Northgate Mall kiosk selling long-distance calling plans for Sprint because the perk of that job was free long distance. “Every lunch break, I was on the phone to Asia,” she says. (Also on those calls: third-party censors in Myanmar who actively commented during the calls — a reminder of the very government that forced her family to flee.) Htun became an American citizen and studied electrical engineering at the University of Washington. She began working at tech companies such as Hewlett Packard and T-Mobile and sometimes spoke to her colleagues of her hope to someday connect all families in Myanmar. Then, in 2011, she found a way to make her dreams a reality when she made a tech-savvy ally in Myanmar’s deputy minister of communications, who also wanted to improve the country’s telecommunications. Htun has since advised the World Bank on her telecommunications initiative and recently cowrote a study funded by the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation about her work. Now, she’s taking that work to a new level by bringing mobile financial services to Myanmar’s rural poor. 46 • March 2018 • parentmap.com

By and large you’ve achieved your goal to bring mobile service to rural Myanmar. Now you’re focused on bringing mobile financial services to these same places. Tell me about the next phase in your work.

I want sending money to each other to be as easy as sending a text message. I based my plan on what I have seen in East Africa. I saw women getting out of poverty using mobile financial services. In China, people send money as a QR code, so it leapfrogs the ATM system. A phone can be a wallet. It’s possible.

Pwint Htun (left) and her mother, Dr. Win Myint Than.

And if you talk to children who have dropped out of school, they say, “Oh, my family had a family emergency; we had to sell our cow or I had to drop out of school.” If people aren’t connected financially, family emergencies have a much greater long-term impact … I want to create a social safety net. Much of your work focuses specifically on women and mothers. Why?

For women in rural areas, access to a bank account is challenging. A lot of the time, the assets are in the man’s name. Time is more limited for women, who also have household chores. Women prioritize their family, and we have found that access to technology and finance, whatever gains that she has, she shares it with her family. [For the study with the Gates Foundation] we talked with several women’s savings groups that really bring women together and empower women. … [In such groups,] women can pool some of the money to do something that is a common good, such as buy rice right after harvest when the prices are low … and sell it when the rice price goes up. They make money this way. The people who control the money in these villages have the power, so if women can work collectively and start saving money and start handling money themselves, they start to have access to finance. Then they can choose to empower themselves financially. Who inspires you to do this work?

How would mobile financial services serve the rural poor in particular?

In Burma [editor’s note: The country of Myanmar was formerly known as Burma, the name that Htun prefers to use], banks don’t have the infrastructure to serve people in rural areas. Without electricity, banks can’t even set up ATM machines. By 2020, we are hoping to have “human ATMs” run by people who own corner grocery stores. In the past, people have used a hundi system, where migrant workers would send money back to family through people they trusted. This takes time, and there’s a risk of theft. There have been cases where someone left town with all [the worker’s] money. Before the telecom network, they didn’t even know if the money made it.

My mother is one of my heroes. She is one of the most dedicated, service-oriented people I’ve ever known [and] having been raised by a single mother, I’ve seen the dedication of a mother to her children. My mother has always worked to serve marginalized populations. [As a physician,] she could have chosen to stay and work in the urban areas, but she chose to work in the rural areas … [and] after we fled Burma, she worked with Cambodian, Laotian and Burmese refugees. She’s now in her 70s and retired [but] she just went to the Thai-Burmese border to train medics at a free clinic. I worried. I didn’t want her to go; I wanted her to slow down. But that’s not happening. Her values shaped me and my sisters, [and] I’m trying to follow her footsteps any way I can. n Jessica Murphy Moo is a writer based in Seattle.

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