Written by: Bailey Hemphill
Family Success Story The Monaghans
M
eet the Monaghans—Brian and Jaci, and their children Shea, Colin, Breanna, Keenan, and Aidan of Millard! The kids attend school in the Millard Public Schools district, and the family has two dogs: Finn, a Cavachon, and Tighe, a Lhasalier. Brian and Jaci have been married for 16 years. “For us, marriage is a loving partnership, which involves friendship, support, teamwork, open communication, compromise, and hard work,” explains Jaci. “It’s helped us to realize that our family is what’s important. By focusing on the relationship in our marriage above other things, our family unit is stronger.” The Monaghans family unit—while strong—is also unique. After they struggled with fertility issues while having their biological children, Colin and Breanna, Brian and Jaci decided to adopt more children. Their oldest daughter, Shea, was adopted from South Korea when she was 7½; son Keenan was adopted from South Korea when he was 5½; and son Aidan was adopted from South Korea when he was 8 months. “I feel really fortunate to have the family that we do,” says Brian.“Each adoption has changed our family dynamic.” Although the adoptions are part of what makes the Monaghans an interesting family, their most recent inspiring story is of Brian’s kidney donation. In August, Brian donated a kidney to Mallory Bultsma (who is featured as our Young Hero). The Monaghans had a mutual friend with the Bultsmas, and that friend had posted on Facebook that they knew a little girl who needed a kidney transplant for O positive blood, along with information about how to contact the family. “[Jaci] had seen that post, so she sent me the message because I have O positive blood,” Brian says. After sending in his sample and going through the match process, Brian started to correspond with Mallory’s mom, Kim, through e-mail. It wasn’t until Brian had gone through the donation surgery in the hospital that he finally got to meet Mallory and her family.
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Breanna, 9, Shea, 12, Aidan, 7, Brian, Jaci, Colin, 12, and Keenan, 8
Even though he still isn’t fully recovered, Brian hasn’t had any major issues after donating his kidney to Mallory. “I was out of work for a total of three weeks from the time the surgery happened until I got back to the office. I’m still a little sore and tired, but otherwise everything went well,” he says. During his three weeks out of work, Jaci had to step up and take care of everything. “Jaci was a huge support. I wasn’t supposed to lift more than 10 pounds or do any repetitive motions,” Brian adds. Jaci took care of both Brian and the kids while he rested, helping with homework and running the kids around town to school and their extracurricular activities. “She had to take on a heavy load,” he says. “When I was in the hospital, it was hard on her because she felt the need to be with me constantly, but she also knew the kids needed her.” But it wasn’t just Jaci who helped Brian out. The kids were also trying to wait on him hand-and-foot. “The kids tried to constantly carry things for me and help me out. [Shea] grew up in South Korea taking care of younger kids, so she had a nurse-like attitude when it came to helping…and [Aidan] kept asking me about my kidney. He kept saying, ‘Is it gone?’ and he wanted to see my scars, asking how my kidney could fit into a little girl,” he adds with a laugh. The kids’ schools were also really supportive. “One of my daughter’s whole class wrote ‘Get Well Soon’ cards for me…I hung them all up in the hospital.” In October, the Monaghans started to return to some normalcy, as Brian went back to work and was able to help out with the kids again. The Monaghans feel their family got through this little rough patch because they’re such a tight-knit group. “We talk about everything at dinner every night—the good and the bad parts of our day,” says Brian. Jaci agrees that her family has done a great job of spending time together, valuing each other over material things, listening to each other, openly communicating, and having a positive outlook on life. “We all just rely on each other. It’s a group effort,” says Brian. “We’re all in this SPECTRUM together, and we’re all part of the family.”
family
• • • • December 2012
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