NORTH BAY BOHEMIAN | JULY 17–23, 2013 | BOHEMIAN.COM
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BOHEMIAN
Rhapsodies My Neighbor, Myself The reward of reaching out to strangers BY MOLLY WOLF
I
am one of those people who tends to attract crazy folks on the street. I make the mistake of making eye contact and being present as they babble about the voices in their head. I am still interested in my fellow humans after all these years of disappointment. On Tuesday, as I was about to enter a grocery store, a woman came toward me burdened by her grocery bags and a cane. She was unsteady on her feet, well-dressed and skinny, like me, pinched face looking down, shoulders hunched forward as if she carried the weight of the world. I asked her if I could help her with her groceries, and at first, she said no. I asked her if she was sure and she began to cry, still walking forward on legs that barely carried her. I joined her, and we moved toward her car. I listened as we walked and her pain, her grief, her trauma and her pasted-together self came spilling out. I had read about her family’s suffering in the Bohemian. Her pain was and is very real. Her story needs airing because it is her painful reality, tangible and the heart a family’s grief, not just the facts. I breathed and I listened and I offered a present, loving few moments of time. It did not take that much of me to offer compassion, understanding, presence or kindness to a stranger in my path. She needed someone, just someone in her community to listen. Just that. Listen and witness and offer kindness. A human connection without iPads, iPhones, emails, texts or any other distractions. Simple and loving. If we’re here together, in this moment, in this community and we cannot just look up and get off the damn phone, why are we even bothering to leave the house? I am honored to have crossed paths with someone for whom I could offer and receive the truth of human suffering with genuine concern. My neighbor, myself. Get off the phone, look up, and offer help. You’ll be amazed how good that feels. Molly Wolf is a dog walker, runner, writer and seeker living in Santa Rosa. Open Mic is a weekly op/ed feature in the Bohemian. We welcome your contribution. To have your topical essay of 350 words considered for publication, write openmic@bohemian.com.
Carrillo Should Resign
Tale of Two Chesters
Let me be among the first to call for Efren Carrillo’s immediate resignation as Fifth District Supervisor. Speaking for many of us in West County, we have had it. Carrillo no longer represents us. The last time he exhibited antisocial behavior like this all we got from him was a stone wall. Now his pal Erik Koenigshofer says that Carrillo is really a nice guy and just has a “drinking problem.” Well, he may have a drinking problem, but a drinking problem does not excuse his behavior, especially from a person in county government. I call for a coalition of county civic groups to come together to nominate a replacement for Carrillo as soon as possible.
I really enjoyed this article, especially for the attention to the situation of California artists (“Gone West,” July 3). There’s a typo in the caption for one of the photos—that’s not Sonoma County’s wonderful author and garlicgrower Chester Aaron (who is also worthy of a profile in your paper) but more likely the person you are quoting in the article, Chester Arnold.
PIETER S. MYERS Occidental
Women Targeted While I certainly share the upset and outrage being expressed over the verdict in the Zimmerman trial, I am puzzled by the silence over similar crimes that occur daily across the country. Thousands of victims are stalked, raped and murdered, targeted as belonging to an oppressed class in our culture. Yes, I’m taking about women. Violence against women is such an ingrained aspect of American life that it goes almost unnoticed, yet it goes on day after day. Women who resist and kill their attackers can be convicted and sent to prison. As a man who’s enjoyed an unconscious sense of entitlement over women from birth, I’m struggling to wake up to this bias and begin to resist the omnipresent messages to objectify and target women: “sexy” advertising, misogyny in “entertainment” and, of course, pornography. Where’s the outrage against this lethal profiling?
NICK STEWART Via online
CAROL SKLENICA Via online
Subtle Metal Boo Radley’s House delivers uncompromised attack on this album (“North Bay Noise,” July 10). As an ex–sound engineer for a few record labels, I find Eye to I to be one of the best pieces of work I’ve heard in a long time. Although it may not find its way into the mind of the masses due to its highly intelligent metal infrastructure, I encourage those with an appreciation for deviation from the norm to give this album a solid listen. It has so many time changes, explosive dynamics and subtle nuances, all seamlessly executed, that listeners will find themselves wanting to study each “chapter.”
STEVE Via online
BottleRock Disaster Wow, this has to be one for the business books as a freeway pile up of the worst business practices in recent memory (“Empty Bottle,” July 10). Why on Earth would any business (much less practically all of the vendors) give credit to a concert promoter on the first year out? Why would a concert promoter allow a primary source of revenue to be managed by a contractor? Lord help any investor suckers lurking nearby.
TM Via online