Lchaim Magazine February 2015 by L'Chaim San Diego Magazine

FEBRUARY 2015

25 ANNUAL TH

SAN DIEGO JEWISH FILM FESTIVAL pg. 16

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February 2015 www.lchaimmagazine.com

Features 12 A Thousand Words Judith Gottesman, MATCHMAKER AND DATING COACH

16 COVER STORY: FILM FEST:

SDJFF Celebrates 25 with a bang!

20 Kavod Elementary A World Class Education

22 Veterans in Our Midst A fly on the wall at a local Jewish War Veterans meeting

26 FOOD: A Jewish Valentine Tuna tartare l Avocado l Chile-soy-lime jus

28 BOOKS: New book tackles hot-button issues in Jewish Law

30 Rock-a-Bye (Beth Am) Baby Synagogue’s latest offerings for children of all ages

Headlines 32 News to Know Now Columns

6 Basics 8 What Jew Mean 9 My Comic Relief 10 Of the Book 29 Mazel & Mishagoss

PUBLISHERS Diane Benaroya & Laurie Miller

L’CHAIM SAN DIEGO, LLC (858) 776-0550 San Diego, CA 92127

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Alanna Maya

EDITORIAL editor@lchaimmagazine.com

CREATIVE DIRECTOR Laurie Miller

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ADVERTISING & SALES Diane Benaroya (dianeb@ lchaimmagazine.com), Ally Ginzberg (chub1@sbcglobal.net), Sharon Rapoport (sharonbux@gmail.com), Ariele Schimm (ariele.schimm@gmail.com)

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CONTRIBUTORS Yigal Adato, Daniel Bortz, Jeffrey Cohan, Aimee Greenberg, Sofie Kinnefors, Stephanie Lewis, Rita Mailheau, Salomon Maya, Matt Miller, Sharon Rapoport, Nikki Salvo

ART DEPARTMENT lauriem@lchaimmagazine.com

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EDUCATION l BY ALAN SILVERMAN l jns.org

basics.

Saving Informal Jewish Education to Save Ourselves

s the director of Camp Moshava, a religious Zionist camp in the Bnei Akiva network, I take great pride in the camper transformations that I witness every summer. The sheepish boys and girls who arrive at the beginning of the summer blossom into confident young men and women over the course of just a few short weeks. Without question, the boost in self-esteem is due to a wide array of fun summertime experiences laced with important life skills. But it’s the way we teach them about Torah and Israel—the core components of their Jewish identities—that really makes the difference. Our campers attend some of the country’s top Jewish educational institutions. They have all studied Torah for years, are quite familiar with Israeli history and culture, and relate to Israel as our Jewish homeland and the center of global Jewish life. It is precisely for this reason that that our job as informal educators is so difficult. Every summer, it is our challenge to introduce new elements of “old” concepts and themes to students who already have an excellent foundational understanding of Judaism and Zionism. Time and time again, we discover that the solution is experiential education. For example, instead of simply delving into the rabbinic commentaries when presenting the story of the Jews crossing the Jordan River, we simulate the event itself. We mimic what it was like for Joshua to lead the entire Jewish nation across the river and to take those exciting first steps into Israel. In that moment, the story that our campers have heard so many times before takes on an entirely different meaning, prompting a newfound appreciation for the challenges that Joshua faced, and his 6

L’CHAIM SAN DIEGO MAGAZINE • FEBRUARY 2015

achievements. When teaching about the importance of a united Jerusalem, our campers are immersed in activities that stimulate all of their senses. They trek through the sites of the capital, making their way from the Old City to the bustling city center. They relive the wars and the struggles of the Israel Defense Forces in recapturing the holy sites of Jerusalem. They hear the sounds of Jews praying at the Kotel, feel the water of the Gihon Spring from the City of David, see the majestic expanse of the Bridge of Strings at the entrance to modern-day Jerusalem, and smell the delicious aroma of freshly baked bread from the Machane Yehuda market. Through these non-traditional methods, our campers gain a deeper understanding of our national connection to and reliance on Jerusalem, and access thoughts and feelings that could not have been awakened in any other way. As a Jewish educator, I recognize the importance of informal education in connecting Jewish youth to their history and heritage. Instead of grappling with dry facts, campers connect to experiences that help them retain the information in their hearts and minds. Informal education helps students make an important leap—from knowing that an event took place, to understanding how the event unfolded and how those who experienced it felt in that moment. I also recognize that even the most effective teaching techniques and Jewish identitybuilding tools can all but vanish if not funded properly. In Jewish education, it is not just the technique and the talent that matter. The financial backing is equally as important, sometimes even more so. It is for this reason that I support the Religious Zionist Slate (www.VoteTorah.org), a party in

the upcoming elections for the World Zionist Congress whose core values include a strong emphasis on Torah and Zionist education. With more than $1 billion dollars in funding for Jewish educational programming up for grabs, it is essential that we support the only party that will ensure continued support for religious youth programs like Bnei Akiva and the growth and continuity of religious Zionist education in our schools, Jewish community centers, and summer camps. It is thrilling to watch Jewish history and contemporary Israeli issues come alive for Jewish children, and it is inspiring to witness their transformations into prouder and more committed members of the Jewish community. This is the power of informal Jewish education. This is the transformation that occurs at summer camp. But we must come to terms with the reality that the kinds of Jewish educational techniques that truly make a difference are not selfsustaining. We owe it to our children and ourselves to make sure that informal Jewish education always receives the funding it warrants and deserves. After all, the future of religious Zionism and Torah Judaism may very well depend on it. ALAN SILVERMAN HAS SERVED AS THE DIRECTOR OF CAMP MOSHAVA FOR 30 YEARS. HE PREVIOUSLY SERVED AS THE ASSOCIATE PRINCIPAL OF GENERAL STUDIES FOR THE ELEMENTARY AND MIDDLE SCHOOLS OF S.A.R. ACADEMY IN RIVERDALE, NY, AND THE DIRECTOR OF EDUCATION, DEVELOPMENT AND TRAINING FOR BNEI AKIVA OF THE U.S. & CANADA. HE LIVES WITH HIS WIFE AND FIVE CHILDREN IN GUSH ETZION.

WWW.LCHAIMMAGAZINE.COM

SPIRITUAL l BY YIGAL ADATO

what

jew mean On Parenting

n November 7, 2012, I was sitting in my room and I had a thought which I decided to write down and share on my facebook page: “Dear parents, new parents and parents to be, remember: When we were young, we never cared what car daddy drove or what watch mommy wore, all we cared about was how much time we got to spend with them. Looking out the window waiting for them to come home or the opportunity to play together, that is what your kids want and will want, along with love, time, devotion and the feeling that you will always be there for them; big house or not. We work so hard to give our young generations what we think they need, but if we rewind the clock and realize what we needed, then we can give them exactly what they need to never stop smiling!” I don’t remember why this came to my

L’CHAIM SAN DIEGO MAGAZINE • FEBRUARY 2015

mind or what I was thinking at the time. I do however remember wanting nothing more than to be with my family and spend quality time with them when I was younger. As we grow up we get more serious and responsible in an effort to bring about success in our lives. We forget what it’s like to be childlike and enjoy being outdoors, just playing with our family and friends. We forget to laugh, we forget to be creative, and we forget to smile at the simple things; like a butterfly or silly putty. Today I smile at the fact that I will soon have the opportunity and the blessing to be a father and the words I wrote more than two years ago remind me of the father I want to be. I am scared and nervous to bring a beautiful baby into this world but I know that time and love is the key. Not just time together but quality time where I am totally present.

Yet, the word “time” has become stressful to think about. We say things like, “I wish I had more time,” “There is not enough time,” and “I ain’t got time for that” when we are being funny. Some people teach that being busy and stressed is the road to success; that being saturated with work is what creates wealth. I think about the lesson I want my future child to learn; that being happy and in the moment is the true key to success. So how can we be fully present? We put our phones down when we are having conversations. We can talk about our feelings and emotions and not dwell on our homes, our cars or the material things we want to buy. We can talk about our goals and our vision for our future as opposed to dwelling in the past and being stuck with things we cannot change. We can look into our loved ones eyes and speak the truth as opposed to being afraid of being judged and withholding what is in our hearts. We can hold each other and comfort each other when times get rough and smile and laugh together when they are great. We can love each other fully and unconditionally. I was told that the greatest love in the world is that of a child to a parent. With that in mind, my goal for this year is to be the man I envision myself to be by upholding my values and creating an example of happiness to my family. Today I challenge you to be the person you want your kids to be; to spend as much quality time with them as possible, and to show them love, compassion, and most important, understanding.

BY SALOMON MAYA l RANDOM RANTS

comic relief Chuppah’s & Lay’s

’ve been married for six months and I already feel like one of those GI’s who landed at Normandy and lived to survive the assault at the beach with all limbs intact. Just by enduring the utter agony of planning a Jewish wedding, you can feel free to call me Private Ryan. I’m sure everyone who has taken their vows under a Chuppah can attest to the many things that they went through on their wedding day/ night, but lucky for you I have the ability to vent in the form of a magazine article. And honestly, this little rant isn’t for you, you’ve survived…this is for that guy. That guy that is at the four year mark at dating the same girl. Yeah, I’m talking to you dude. I know you’re watching movies like Parenthood and shows like Say Yes to the Dress and breaking out into a cold sweat. Let me start with this: It’s not that bad. There will be days where you’ll log onto Southwest.com to see flights to Las Vegas and mumble to yourself ah to hell with them all (and by them I mean

everyone who’s not your fiancé). I had many of those days. Even though a lot of things went right, the stress really came from the small stuff. I never knew centerpieces could cause such a rift between two people who are supposedly in love. I mean they’re just flowers right? Oh hell no they’re not. Since the wife and I are both writers, we stuck to a writing theme, having a vintage typewriter instruct people to the table they were assigned to. And that’s where my hell began. The dreaded table assignments. Our wedding was approximately 200 people, the wife wanted one thing while I wanted another, and the war begun. My biggest advice to couples planning their wedding, especially to the grooms: just let her have it. It’s just not worth it. You know what’s worth it? Peacefulness. My last little anecdote for ya’ll about my wedding day happened 30 minutes before I was supposed to walk down the aisle. Upon arriving to the synagogue I

was dumbfounded by how beautiful it looked. A long white runner leading up to a beautifully decked out Chuppah. Our Rabbi quickly saw me and asked to speak to us. We went into his office and he said words I never thought I’d hear a whole half hour before my wedding. “I can’t marry you,” he said. I lost all my saliva within my mouth as the butterflies that were in my stomach originally now turned into dragons. I asked why and he said, “You don’t have a kosher Chuppah, it has no roof.” Now, my wife was in charge of renting the Chuppah so as I went over to it and saw it I also noticed that it was lacking the very thing that made it a Chuppah, a damn roof. The wife was in her bride’s room, resting and eating Lay’s potato chips mind you, as I broke the news to her. We were now down to 15 minutes and some people had already started to arrive (definitely not Mexican Jews because they’re allergic to promptness). And as quick as the conflict arose, an idea came to me. I was going to have four of my closest friends sign my Ketubah as witnesses, and I asked the Rabbi, if they could hold the largest tallit he had over us, would that make the Chuppah kosher? He said, absolutely. Crisis averted, and on August 9, 2014, I married my best friend under a Chuppah supported by four of the friends I have known the longest, surrounded by my most cherished family and friends. The battle had been fought and won; the war my friends, well that’s a whole different story. SALOMON MAYA IS A LOCAL ACTOR AND PLAYWRIGHT. FOLLOW HIM ON TWITTER @SALOMAYA WWW.LCHAIMMAGAZINE.COM

TORAH l BY RABBI DANIEL BORTZ

of the

book The time is now

e live today in an unsettling, yet promising time. The Middle East is as violent and unruly as ever. Israel is attacked and vilified, both in its land and around the world. Yet it still blossoms; this precious, beautiful land that our ancestors pined for is a home for every Jew. Today we can enjoy it, and doubt should never creep into our minds regarding the Jewish right to this land. After finishing an after school honors course for high school students this past week, I asked them to find proof for a Jewish claim to the land of Israel. While many focused on claims of historical presence, purchase of the land, military conquest, and international legitimacy, others looked to the Torah—Israel as a Divine gift. Here are a few excerpts: “The history of Israel goes back over 3,300 years. The Jewish people first arrived and settled in the land when Joshua led them into Canaan. From that point forward, there has never been a time in history where Jews have not been living in the land of Israel. This contiguous presence is evident not only by the bible, but by numerous archaeological findings. Nothing convinced the Jews to flee, from the destruction of the two Temples to the murderous Crusaders of the 12th century and the Arab riots in the 1920’s. —David Aires, Rachel Danzig, & Nicole Sayd 10

L’CHAIM SAN DIEGO MAGAZINE • FEBRUARY 2015

“By 1930, Jews owned 52.6% of the land, while Palestinians owned 24.6%.” —Natan Elghanian “The U.N. voted to recognize the Jewish State in Resolution 181.” —Tali Edid “Israel won the Six-Day War in a defensive war, which earned them the West Bank, the Gaza Strip, the Sinai Peninsula, the Golan Heights, and most importantly, Jerusalem.” —Daniella Datnow Genesis 12, 13, 15, 17: And G-d spoke to Abraham, ‘Go from your country, your people and your father’s household to the land I will show you.’ ‘The entire land that you see, I will give to you and your descendants forever.’ ‘Arise and traverse the land, in its length and in its breadth, for to you I shall give it.’ ‘Raise your eyes, and, from the place where you are now, look to the north, to the south, to the east and to the west. For all the land that you see, I will give to you and to your offspring forever… I am G-d who took you out of Ur Casdim to give you this land as a possession.’ ‘To you and your offspring I will give the land where you are now living as a foreigner. The whole land of Canaan shall be your eternal heritage, and I will be a God to your descendants.’” —

Eitan Abu, Elias Sitton & Paulina Waiss “Therefore arise, cross this Jordan, you and all this people, to the land which I am giving to them, to the sons of Israel. Every place on which the sole of your foot treads, I have given it to you, just as I spoke to Moses. From the wilderness and this Lebanon, even as far as the great river, the river Euphrates.” —Jack Calderon Regarding Jerusalem, ‘And King David said to Ornan, “No, for I will buy [it] for the full price...” And David gave Ornan gold weighing six hundred shekels for the place.” —Eitan Abu Regardless of International pressure, accusations, or the state of a peace process, it is important for both the Jewish people and the rest of the world to know the history of Israel, and primarily its eternal, Divine connection with the Jewish people. If we stood up and proudly and unequivocally declared this for all to hear, perhaps the perception of Israel would change. RABBI DANIEL BORTZ IS THE DIRECTOR OF JTEEN SAN DIEGO, JTEENSD.COM. FOR INFORMATION ON CLASSES, CONTACT HIM AT DANIELBORTZ@GMAIL.COM.

L’CHAIM l BY ALANNA MAYA

L’CHAIM SAN DIEGO MAGAZINE • FEBRUARY 2015

L’CHAIM

A THOUSAND

WORDS

Judith Gottesman, MATCHMAKER & DATING COACH

rofessional matchmaker and dating coach Judith Gottesman is celebrating her sixth year in business, though she began making matches long before then. Gottesman says it was a match made in Israel nearly 20 years ago that was her first, and she was hooked. She realized that she had an intuitive sense and was able to recognize a true “soul mate” very soon afterward, and went on to set up several more couples, all of whom are still happily married. Today, she is focused more than ever on making Jewish matches through her company, Soul Mates Unlimited, and though based in the Bay Area, she works with people seeking love from all over.

LCHAIM MAGAZINE: WHAT BROUGHT YOU TO MATCHMAKING? JUDITH GOTTESMAN: I am a true

romantic who believes in the power of love. I grew up watching my father, Rabbi Aaron Gottesman, do beautiful wedding ceremonies and learned about the Jewish views on love and marriage. I like to help people. I have advanced psychology degrees which help me observe details about people and that makes for better matches. So many people asked me for assistance in finding love that I started my business so I could help more people in a full-time, formal manner.

LCHAIM: WHAT ARE SOME OF THE PRINCIPLES YOU LIKE TO FOLLOW WHEN IT COMES TO FINDING SOMEONE’S B’SHERT? JG: I think the Jewish idea of soul mates

holds true no matter what the religion;

the couple must have physical attraction, share values, lifestyle, and long term goals. Essentially, your b’shert is someone who is your best friend, trusted confidant and lover. You need all three for the relationship to work long term. Without trust, you don’t have anything. You also need attraction and to enjoy each other’s company. I have lots of divorced clients who were married to someone with whom they had just physical attraction or just friendship. Neither is sufficient for a happy marriage; you need both friendship and physical chemistry. LCHAIM: DO YOU MAKE MATCHES OUTSIDE OF JUDAISM? WHY OR WHY NOT? JG: In the past, I’ve matched couples

where both people weren’t Jewish, but my business focuses on the Jewish community. We are a tiny minority and it’s really hard for Jews outside of Israel to find each other. I feel very strongly that religious values and religious observance (or lack thereof) are something very important and personal, and need to be shared for a couple to be harmonious. While there are always exceptions, in general, you want to marry someone who’s similar to you in important areas such as religion. This way, you can share your practice, rather than having conflict or having to worship without your spouse.

LCHAIM: WHAT IS THE PROCESS THAT YOU ASK PEOPLE TO GO THROUGH SO THAT YOU CAN GET TO KNOW THEM, WHAT THEY WANT IN A PARTNER, ETC;

AND HOW LONG DOES THIS PROCESS USUALLY TAKE? JG: I conduct an initial hour-long in-depth

interview with new clients to get a sense of who they are and what they’re looking for in a match. I then ask them to update me on factors which may affect a match change over time, such as their life goals, locale, deal-breakers, job or retirement status.

LCHAIM: ABOUT HOW MANY PEOPLE DO YOU HAVE IN YOUR DATABASE WHO ARE CURRENTLY LOOKING FOR MATCHES? JG: I am the main matchmaker for the

entire West Coast Jewish community. Any Jewish adult who is looking for love can come to me for assistance. My database is always in flux as new clients come aboard and current clients find love and either put their files on hold or are successfully matched and close their files permanently. I have clients of all ages, from 20 somethings to people in their early 90s. They live all over the West Coast and beyond. I always tell people “it’s not about the numbers,” and even have a video about that on my website. There are thousands of people on dating sites who are still single because love isn’t about quantity. My clients don’t want a lot of different dates, they want to find “the one.”

LCHAIM: WHAT IS THE AVERAGE TIME IT TAKES FOR YOU TO MAKE A MATCH? JG: I can never predict or control if I’ll have

someone’s match or how long it will take. I’m very good at recognizing who goes well together and my clients appreciate that I don’t waste their time sending them WWW.LCHAIMMAGAZINE.COM

L’CHAIM

Check it out

soulmatesunlimited.com

out on random dates to meet quotas. I only send them out when I have someone I think they’ll like who meets their criteria. Of course, chemistry in person when they meet is the final determining factor, but they know the match makes sense on paper. The rest is up to them. Everyone is unique and looking for something different so everyone will have a different experience. I studied statistics as part of my psychology background and one of the main rules of statistics is that they don’t apply to individuals. Some people get matched right away since I already have their match. Most of the time, it’s a waiting game until their match comes along and I never know who’ll be the lucky one to find their soul mate right away. In matters of love and the heart, it’s really about fate and God bringing two people together, and I just assist in making that happen. LCHAIM: AT WHAT POINT SHOULD SOMEONE TRY MATCHMAKING, OVER THE TRADITIONAL WAYS TO MEET A PARTNER, OR INTERNET DATING? 14

L’CHAIM SAN DIEGO MAGAZINE • FEBRUARY 2015

JG: I believe anyone who is serious about finding genuine love should try every avenue out there. I’m one avenue to help them in their search. People have to be proactive and not just expect love to find them. Matchmaking is also a traditional Jewish way of meeting a partner. I do traditional matchmaking with a modern twist. LCHAIM: WHAT ADVICE CAN YOU GIVE TO PEOPLE WHO ARE DATING, BUT CAN’T SEEM TO FIND THEIR SPECIAL SOMEONE? JG: The most important thing is to stay

hopeful and have a positive attitude. Again, be proactive. Along with matchmaking, I provide date coaching. Together, I can strategize with my clients on other methods in a search for love and also ways to make them more appealing. I look for blocks they’re putting up in their search for love. For those who want practice, we also go over possible dating scenarios and things to say or not say with a date. Sometimes selfimprovement work or date coaching makes

a big difference. Having faith, patience, and being proactive are paramount. LCHAIM: WHAT MAKES YOUR COMPANY UNIQUE? JG: I’m a boutique company and I provide

a highly personalized service. My clients always talk with me directly, not an employee, and I do all matching and date coaching myself. I charge only 1/3 of the cost up front and the remaining 2/3 is due only after they are successfully matched. I only match clients with clients and personally interview every client. I also offer complete confidentiality and never share my client base with other companies. My high profile clients especially value their privacy. Also, I deal exclusively with Jewish clientele and work with clients of all ages. FOR MORE INFORMATION ON SOUL MATES UNLIMITED, VISIT SOULMATESUNLIMITED.COM OR CONTACT JUDITH GOTTESMAN AT INFO@ SOULMATESUNLIMITED.COM OR (510) 418-8813.

WWW.LCHAIMMAGAZINE.COM

FILM FEST l BY ALANNA MAYA

JEWISH

A Silver

Anniversary for the

Film Fest fil

t s m fe

n only his second year as the San Diego Jewish Film Festival’s Executive Director, Craig Prater has already made a large impact on the premier event in town. This year is the festival’s 25th, a milestone for any film festival, but especially, he says, for a genre-specific one like ours. The festival has grown leaps and bounds over the years, and even in the year between the 24th and 25th annual event has seen some major growth: more films, more screenings and more screens means there’s no excuse for missing the festival this month. A total of 48 feature films and documentaries from all genres will be on display February 5-15, along with 50 short films as part of the Joyce Forum on February 9. Locations in Carlsbad, La Jolla, San Marcos and Clairemont will showcase world-class theater for all ages. LCHAIM spoke with Prater last month about the planning process and what audiences can expect this year. LCHAIM: Wow! How does it feel to be here for your second year as the film festival’s executive director? Is it easier? Craig Prater: I don’t know that it has become easier because we are bigger this year. We have more films, more screens,

16 16

L’CHAIM SAN SAN DIEGO DIEGO MAGAZINE MAGAZINE •• FEBRUARY FEBRUARY 2015 2015 L’CHAIM

SDJFF Celebrates 25 with a bang!

and more time slots; so that in itself is more challenging, but it’s exactly what we wanted. It’s really exciting to be a part of the 25th year of the film fest here, because that is a big accomplishment for a film festival, and they have obviously been doing something right for 24 years or they wouldn’t still be here, so credit goes to all those people that have paved the way and made it possible for the festival to exist this long. LCHAIM: When did you start planning for the 25th anniversary? CP: People can verify that even last year, when I first started, we were already talking about the 25th anniversary, so we spent about 2-3 weeks wrapping things up for 2014, and then it was full speed ahead for the 25th anniversary planning. Between the committee members, and myself about 200-300 films total are screened before we narrow down the decision to the films you see on our lineup today. LCHAIM: What do you have planned to commemorate this milestone? CP: Well, a larger quantity of films in general, and not only more films, but more screenings in different locations. We have

an extra screen in the North County area, and though last year we had just 2 or 3 films being screened at the Garfield here at the JCC, this year we will have 25. Also, something I discovered by accident this year, is something very special. Down through the years, audience favorites at this film festival happen to be a collection of four films that went on to win top awards worldwide or are considered to this day to be four of the top international film festival films. So to commemorate ad honor the 25th anniversary, we have brought those four classic films back to be screened as part of the anniversary celebration. To think that it was our audience, in some cases, 20 some-odd years ago, saying “these were our favorite films,” and they went on to great acclaim, is just fantastic. The films, “Amy and Jaguar,” “Gloomy Sunday,” “Nowhere in Africa,” and “All My Loved Ones” will be screened only one time during the film festival, and in different locations, but we expect those to be well attended, regardless. LCHAIM: Any other special events planned? CP: Well, we have a double feature, with “The Israeli Code,” and “Advanced Style,”

FILM FEST

JEWISH

fil

m f est

both of which are films dealing with pop culture and fashion, and in between these screenings we will host a fashion show by a local clothing store that features several Israeli designers. So, for the price of one ticket, audiences get 2 screenings and a fashion show! Also very exciting for that event is that the man featured in “Advanced Style,” Ari Seth Cohen, happens to be a local guy, and he will be here promoting his film. In the fashion show, the models will be local people that everyone in attendance will likely know, so it will be very fun. LCHAIM: The festival has always celebrated short films. How will that tradition continue and grow this year? CP: Last year, we had three programs of short films as part of the Joyce Forum, and this year, we have 10 programs, so we have a total of 50 short films, expanding that program substantially. Then, the very next morning, we will have a program called “Breakfast with Joyce,” which will just be a delight. You can come and have bagels and coffee with the founder of the film festival and the creator of the Joyce Forum and then attend the awards ceremony to announce the top short films from the day before.

LCHAIM: What are your favorites this year? CP: Topping the list for me this year, of about four or five, is “Run Boy Run,” based on a true story. It is rough to watch going through and you think, enough already, but if you just sit tight, you will see that this film is truly inspiring. Then of course, one of our anniversary films, “Gloomy Sunday” is one of my number one films of all time, period. I am also really partial to our closing film, “Little White Lie,” based on a true story, and the director, Lacey Schwartz will be here for that one. It’s about a girl who grew up in a Jewish traditional home, but something wasn’t right, and she finds out some things about her mother’s past that make her question her upbringing. I think as the audience watches this film, they will really resonate with the story, and it will be quite moving to see the director and her mother at the screening afterward. LCHAIM: Comparative to other film fests you have worked on, how is this one different, and how has your past shaped you in your approach here? CP: When you reach a certain age and you

have done this for a while, and in a lot of different countries and for film festivals of any size, I like to tell people that I have made all the mistakes I can make. You name it; I’ve done it when it comes to mistakes. So, I know naturally what to avoid. The thing that interests me in the film festival here is that it has been around a number of years, so I knew that they were doing something right. There is also a real international trend for film festivals in general to be genrespecific, whether it be a Jewish film festival, an Italian, Latino or gay film festival, genrespecific film festivals are surfacing and holding their own. So, using my years of experience in some general film festivals, I am able to zero-in on this genre and make something really great happen here. FOR TICKETS AND FOR MORE INFORMATION ABOUT FILMS, SCREENING TIMES AND TICKETS, VISIT SDCJC.ORG/ SDJFF.

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EDUCATION l BY ERIN PHILIPS

KAVOD

ELEMENTARY A WORLD-CLASS EDUCATION

n a sunny Tuesday afternoon, Kavod Elementary Charter School is buzzing. First grade students color pictures of an Ethiopian family they are studying as part of the school’s global awareness curriculum. Second graders are seated at low, round tables doing group work in line with the school’s workshop model of instruction. Third graders are gleefully making slime as part of a science experiment, their hands dyed blue and green and purple as they show off their squishy blobs of glue and borax. Family trees made of student handprints hang in classroom windows, and each bungalow is named for a different city in Israel. A HebrewEnglish language charter school, Kavod shares a site with Cubberley Elementary School near Qualcomm Stadium, but is worlds away from a traditional public school experience.

ABOUT KAVOD

“Kavod” means honor and respect in Hebrew, and the school’s motto is “Respect Makes a World of Difference.” Founded on 20

the four pillars of Academic Excellence, Dual Language, Social Responsibility, and Global Awareness, Kavod (kah-VODE) opened its doors in the fall of 2013 and is now in its second year of operation. Kavod does not teach religion and is open to all San Diego Unified School District public school children. Due to its innovative learning model, start-up charter school environment, and the well-documented academic and cognitive advantages of learning a foreign language at an early age, the school has attracted a diverse student population from all over San Diego. Only a handful of students speak Hebrew at home, and many students are not Jewish. Small class sizes, service learning and “a deep commitment to the development of responsible citizens who can thrive in [a] global community,” are just a few of the aspects that set Kavod apart.

DUAL LANGUAGE

Kavod Elementary is part of a network of schools that partners with the Hebrew Charter School Center (HCSC), a nonprofit organization founded in 2009 to help

L’CHAIM SAN DIEGO MAGAZINE • FEBRUARY 2015

advance the Hebrew language charter school movement. “HCSC members were an initial part of [Kavod’s] founding team, giving their support and recommendations as to what has worked with the other schools,” Kavod’s Director Alexa Greenland says. “So when we opened the door, we weren’t opening an unknown quantity. We were following a model that’s been successful.” As a dual-immersion school, reading, writing and math at Kavod are conducted in English, Hebrew is conducted entirely in Hebrew, and science, social studies, PE and electives are conducted in both languages. All communication with Hebrew-language instructors, including at meal times, during recess, and between classes, is conducted in Hebrew. Students’ Hebrew language proficiency is evaluated according to the guidelines established by the American Council on the Teaching of Foreign Languages (ACTFL). “The goal is that most of our students who have been at Kavod for a minimum of four years will be at the Intermediate level in speaking and

EDUCATION

GLOBAL AWARENESS

As part of its emphasis on global awareness, Kavod uses the Cultural History of Israel and its Immigrant Communities (CHIIC) social studies curriculum designed by HCSC. Each year, students are introduced to families that live on the fictional “HaOlam” Street (“The World” Street) in Israel. Through this narrative device, students are introduced to a multitude of peoples, cultures, and countries, and learn about diversity, acceptance, community and the multiculturalism that exists in the modern state of Israel. Mailboxes in every classroom are set up for students to receive letters from the Moroccan, Russian, Ethiopian, Yemeni, Iraqi, Iranian, Hungarian and Polish families they learn about. listening and in Novice-High in reading and writing,” Greenland states.

ACADEMIC EXCELLENCE

Although Kavod Elementary is a charter school, giving it some flexibility as far as curriculum, instruction is still assessmentdriven and aligned to the Common Core State Standards. The workshop model and a 15:1 student-to-instructor ratio allow teachers to differentiate instruction and group students according to their strengths in each subject. Students begin each lesson in a large group on the rug, move into smaller groups at their tables, and then on to individual work. For every class with over 18 students, a support teacher is brought in to assist the lead teacher with lessons. Kavod has an extended day, more instructional days than California district schools, and subjects that rotate times as part of a block schedule “to help students learn when they learn best,” Greenland says. In lieu of homework, teachers provide parents with information and questions to ask during home review, which encourages families to engage in their students’ learning. “Our goal is to take the struggle [over schoolwork] out of the home environment,” Greenland says. “The teaching should really occur in the classroom.” Last year the school met 100% of its academic goals in reading, writing, math, and Hebrew.

SOCIAL RESPONSIBILITY

Values are a key component of the Kavod experience. “Everything is tied

to respect,” Greenland says. “We really focus on positive reinforcement.” Respect, compassion, courtesy, empathy, teamwork, integrity, diversity, responsibility, and perseverance are encouraged and discussed as part of being good citizens. Students develop social and emotional skills using a toolbox of coping techniques like breathing exercises, to help them make better choices. This year, a new recognition program rewards students who are “spotted being respectful.” Students get to wear a Super Spot Award around their necks for the day and are recognized at school-wide values meetings. A school dress code also encourages a culture of respect and a focus on learning. Beyond the core subjects, flex periods provide time for technology instruction, values meetings, and additional instruction in any academic areas of need. This year, a new initiative called Kavod Families places students from different grade levels in groups to discuss values, which stemmed from a parent suggestion. “Parents have appropriate voice here,” Greenland says. “When something is in the best interest of the school…we implement it. We listen to them.” Students also participate in student-initiated service learning and community service projects. Last year, the second grade students mad e no-sew blankets for sick children, and the first grade class was inspired to start a Pay-ItForward kindness project after finding out that a stranger had paid for their teacher’s cup of coffee one morning before school.

THE FUTURE

In the school’s 2013-2014 end-of-theyear survey, 98% of students stated that they would tell a friend they liked their school. Overwhelmingly positive feedback from families and word-of-mouth recommendations have driven student enrollment, and there are currently 92 students enrolled in two kindergartens, one first grade, one second grade, and one third grade class. The school will expand over time to serve at least grades K-5, adding a grade level each year as students progress. With a goal of two classes per grade level and 25-30 students per class, the school will eventually outgrow its current home and is looking at options for moving to a permanent site. Grant money has funded projects including the school garden and an art and music program, and Greenland has goals to further enhance technology at the school. SMART boards are number one on her wish list. Hebrew immersion classes for parents are new this year, as is a cultural fair, and the school hopes to add more events and activities for families including a science fair and math night. Mesibat (“party” in Hebrew), the school’s main fundraiser, is being coordinated by parent volunteers and will be bigger and better than ever. “It’s an opportunity to help and be part of building something,” Greenland says. “We want to become a common name in San Diego and get exposure as a new charter.” In the end, “it’s all about finding the right school for a child.” FOR MORE INFO CONTACT KAVODELEMENTARY.ORG WWW.LCHAIMMAGAZINE.COM

SENIORS l BY ERIN PHILIPS

VETERANS IN OUR

MIDST

A fly on the wall at a local Jewish War Veterans meeting

he U.S. Census Bureau estimates there are more than 234,000 veterans living in San Diego County, about 10% of the total civilian population 18 years and over. These veterans served during World War II, the Korean War, the Vietnam War, the Gulf War and the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. They range in age from teenagers fresh out of high school to greatgrandparents in their 90s. They are men and women of every age, race, religion, and socioeconomic class. I was interested in learning more about the Jewish veterans in San Diego, so in November, I attended a meeting of the local post of Jewish War Veterans of the USA (JWV). JWV was founded in 1896 and is the oldest veterans organization in America. Its purpose is to support and promote services and programs for all veterans, combat antiSemitism and advocate for veterans and the Jewish community here and abroad. The Harry Apleman & Arthur Towne Post 185 meets on the second Sunday of each month at Paradise Village, a retirement community in National City, to discuss veterans issues, organize events and programming, socialize and share stories of service over coffee, lox and bagels (an essential part of any Jewish American gathering). Captain Sheldon Margolis, USN, Retired, is Commander of Post 185 and Executive Director of the Veterans Museum and

L’CHAIM SAN DIEGO MAGAZINE • FEBRUARY 2015

Memorial Center in Balboa Park. He leads the 65-member group, which skews older and is predominantly male. On the day I attended a JWV meeting, about 20 veterans, spouses and caretakers were in attendance including: Post 185 Vice Commander Jerry Klein; Lieutenant Colonel Allen R. Miliefsky, USAF, Retired; Colonel Clark J. Kholos, USAF, Retired; Dr. Jerome Levy; and Dr. Louis Towne, son of post name honoree Arthur Towne. Many members wore Post 185 caps with military decorations, and the meeting began with ceremony: we all rose for the Pledge of Allegiance, preparation of the altar, and an opening prayer led by Chaplain Betty, a proud veteran’s wife with years of service. As we went around the room to introduce ourselves, I learned that the veterans’ experience spanned World War II, Korea, and Vietnam; included many branches of the military and multiple positions: Air Force, Army, Navy, Marine Corps; physician, engineer, surgeon, flight navigator. The men completed decades of service in locations all over the world, from Southeast Asia to Europe to bases across the U.S., and many continue to serve as volunteers knitting hats and blankets for the USO and visiting with patients at the VA hospital. Many were excited for the chance to share their story and have Jewish veterans in the spotlight. The day’s agenda touched on a wide

range of topics and issues concerning veterans, seniors, and Jewish interests: volunteering for a Jewish hospice program; participating in upcoming Veterans Day events; debating the Mt. Soledad cross; and coming up with ideas for fundraising, increasing awareness and growing the post’s membership. The 239th birthday of the Marine Corps prompted one member to tell a classic veteran joke that made me–the uninitiated–laugh, and elicited groans from everyone else: “There are only two branches of the military: the Army and the Navy. The Air Force is a corporation, and the Marine Corps is a cult.” After the ceremonial closing prayer and salute, the veterans disbursed to go about their Sundays, looking forward to the next meeting which would include candlelighting and latkes for Hanukah. When asked about goals for 2015, Captain Margolis said Post 185 hopes to “increase active membership, continue to conduct our annual cookout at the airport with the USO, and enhance the “Gift for a Yank” program at the VA hospital and Veterans Village in San Diego.” TO SUPPORT THE HARRY APLEMAN & ARTHUR TOWNE POST 185 IN SAN DIEGO, AND FOR MORE INFORMATION, VISIT JEWISH WAR VETERANS OF THE USA AT JWV.ORG.

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Invites you to become a member • Fight Post anti-Semitism • Support our military overseas 185 San Diego • Comradeship • Support through scouting & JROTC Invites you to becomeyouth a member • Fight anti-Semitism Capt. Sheldon Margolis, USN Ret. Post Cmdr. (858) 774-6778 • Support our military overseas Lt/Col. Allen Miliefsky, USAF Ret. Past State Cmdr. (619) 737-6910 Col. Jerry Klein, USAF Ret. Vice Post Cmdr. (858) 521-8694 • Comradeship • Support youth through THE OLDEST ACTIVE VETERANS scouting & JROTC

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BADASS KOSHER l BY MICHAEL GARDINER

A Jewish Valentine

TUNA TARTARE | AVOCADO | CHILE-SOY-LIME JUS 26

L’CHAIM SAN DIEGO MAGAZINE • FEBRUARY 2015

hat is a Jew to do for a holiday that began its life as “St. Valentine’s Day” complete with Vatican imprimatur? The answer is simple (at least if your level of observance allows cooking on Shabbat): make an edible Valentine. After all, Valentine’s Day lost its Saintly designation along with its place on the General Roman Calendar in the Vatican’s 1969 revision. Combine that with the fact that Valentine’s Day overlaps with Shabbat this year and the case for a double mitzvah trumping an outdated Saint is compelling. Right? While there were supposedly three (and possibly as many as seven) “Saint Valentines,” all of whom were supposedly martyred on February 14, their stories seem particularly apocryphal. They certainly appear more sentimental than

BADASS KOSHER

spiritually compelling. That, as much as anything else, might be a reason for the Vatican’s change of heart. Perhaps the real reason for the original adoption of the holiday was more political: co-opting the pagan Lupercalia festival. Lupercalia began as a festival in which the Roman Priests would gather in the sacred cave where the infants Romulus and Remus, the founders of Rome, were believed to have been cared for by a she-wolf (or “lupa”). The priests would sacrifice a goat (for fertility) and a dog (for purification), cut the goat’s hide into strips, dip them into the sacrificial blood and take to the streets where they would gently slap women with the goat hide strips. Roman women welcomed the touch of the hides because they thought it would make them more fertile in the coming year. Later in the day all the young women in the city would place their names in a big urn from which the city’s bachelors would each choose a name and become paired for the year with his chosen woman. These pairings usually ended in marriage. Whipping with blood soaked goat strips is, perhaps, a bit two millennia ago for my household. Aphrodisiacs – traditional and perhaps a bit less traditional – struck me as a far better bet. My Valentine, strange as it may sound, adores Steak Tartare. It is one of her favorite meals. While it might not, at first blush, seem like an obviously romantic dish, interpreted in seafood form it gets a bit closer. The hotness factor of chile peppers can hardly be doubted and the double entendre is obvious and somewhat traditional. The Catholic Church in Mexico banned avocados because the way they hung from trees apparently reminded priests of testicles. That is a joke that nearly tells itself. From my perspective their aphrodisiac quality finds a more obvious source once the fruit is cut in half, but I’m neither Catholic nor a priest. Those ingredients lend themselves well to a Badass Kosher approach: restaurant quality elegant, if edgy cuisine readily approachable in a Kosher home. There is nothing here that is particularly difficult. Slightly freezing the tuna will make the knife work a breeze. The toughest part of the recipe is all of the steps. But many of them are optional. The dish will be delicious (if not quite as pretty) without the cilantro oil or the leek garnishes. Even the most exotic of the techniques – the microwave “fried” leeks – is little more than what many

do on a nightly basis. The essence of the dish is the tartare preparation and how it combines on the palate with the jus. And that is a good thing or I would neither enjoy the fruits of this Valentine’s meal nor be married to my Valentine and have a certain Valentine’s Day double mitzvah in my immediate future.

Tuna Tartare | Avocado | Chile-Soy-Lime Jus

Makes 2 Servings INGREDIENTS: TUNA TARTARE:

• 12 ounces sushi-grade ahi tuna, diced • 1 tablespoon olive oil • 1 tablespoon soy sauce • 1 tablespoon Maggi sauce • 2 tablespoons fresh lime juice • 1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce • 1 tablespoon capers, drained

CHILE-SOY-LIME JUS:

• 1 tomato, roughly chopped • 2 jalapeño chilies, stemmed, seeded, and thinly sliced • ½ cup lime juice, freshly squeezed • ½ cup chicken stock • 3 tablespoons soy sauce

MICROWAVE “FRIED” LEEK: • 1 leek • Grapeseed oil

CILANTRO OIL:

• 1 bunch cilantro leaves • ½ cup extra virgin oil • Dash of salt

GARNISHES:

• 1 fresh avocado (Hass or Fuerte, whatever is freshest and best tasting in the market) • 4-6 “fried” leek strips • Cilantro (or other herb) oil

1. Make the Cilantro Oil. Blanch the cilantro in boiling water for 10 seconds. Shock in ice water and wring all water from the parsley. Place the cilantro in the bowl of a food processor and add a dash of salt. With the processor running, add the oil in a slow and steady stream. Place the herb and oil mixture in a bowl and refrigerate until the rest of the dish is completed. 2. Prepare the Tuna Tartare. In a large bowl, whisk together the olive oil, soy sauce, Maggi Sauce, lime juice and Worcestershire sauce. Add the remaining ingredients and gently toss to combine. 3. Make the Chile-Soy-Lime Jus. Combine the chopped tomato, jalapeño chilies and ¼ cup of the lime juice in a sauce pan and bring to a boil over high heat. Reduce the flame and simmer for five minutes. Add the other ¼ cup of lime juice, the stock and soy sauce to the pan and barely simmer for ten minutes. 4. “Fry” the leek. Cut the leek in half lengthwise. Slice the outer leaves of the leek into long, lengthwise strips. Lightly brush the grapeseed oil on a large plate. The entire plate should be oiled but the layer should be extremely thin. Arrange leek strips on the plate (you may have to work in batches). Set your microwave oven to 800 watts (the precise strength setting will depend on the total maximum wattage of your microwave oven; for me it was 6) and fry the leek strips for about 3-5 minutes, until the strips are just crunchy and beginning to brown. 5. Prep the Garnishes. Strain the cilantro oil through a fine mesh sieve. Spoon the Tuna Tartare into a ring mold on the plate. Slice the avocado in half lengthwise. After removing the pit, cut the flesh into lengthwise slices in the skins. Using a large soup spoon scoop the flesh out – separating it from the skins. 6. Plate the Dish. Place two slices of avocado on each plate creating an uneven oval pattern with an empty hole in the middle. Using a ring mold arrange the tuna on top of the avocado. Use a wine glass, spoon or spatula compress the tartare just enough to make sure it stays in place. Carefully place two to four strips of “fried” leek over each tartare. Spoon the jus around the plate and drizzle with the cilantro oil. WWW.LCHAIMMAGAZINE.COM

BOOKS l BY JESSICA SINGER/JNS.ORG

FROM ABORTION TO CONVERSION

PHOTO BY KOREN PUBLISHERS JERUSALEM

NEW BOOK TACKLES HOT-BUTTON ISSUES IN JEWISH LAW

ne of the most beautiful aspects about Jewish life is its diversity— the tapestry of colors that make up how Jews around the world practice Jewish tradition and its laws. Yet it is this very diversity that is contentious, or oftentimes divisive and charged, especially when people begin to deliberate whose observance carries more halakhic (Jewish legal) legitimacy. For columnist and educator Rabbi Shlomo Brody, appreciating “Shiv’im panim LaTorah”—which in a literal sense means the 70 faces of the Torah, but in a practical sense refers to the Torah’s numerous possible interpretations—begins with giving popular access to the historical, legal, and theological sources that impact halakhic discourse. Brody’s debut book, which is based on his popular newspaper column, features 134 concise essays on today’s most provocative issues in Jewish law. These issues include abortion, paternity and DNA testing, downloading from the Internet, organ donation, the “protective

L’CHAIM SAN DIEGO MAGAZINE • FEBRUARY 2015

power” of the red string, kol isha (female singing), female rabbinic ordination, fleeing Israel during wartime, fertility treatments, stem cell research, conversion standards, and more. In the following interview, Brody provides a behind-the-scenes look at his newly published work, “A Guide to the Complex: Contemporary Halakhic Debates” (Maggid Books, 2014). Q: What was your goal in writing this book? A: Many Jews want to be knowledgeable about the hot topics of debate within Jewish law, but frequently don’t have the time to properly research the nuances and complexities of the disputes. I wanted to create a book that was sufficiently indepth to be informative even for rabbis, yet concise and accessible so that anyone could use it for passionate discussions around the Shabbat table or in college dorm rooms. Q: You write that it is harmful to the community when people are passionate about halakhic controversies, but do not know the sources. Can you elaborate on why you believe this is dangerous? A: Jewish legal debates are full of nuances, and it’s nearly impossible to appreciate the complexity of the subject without some access to the sources. Moreover, when people can root their opinions within texts, they can create a shared language that allows for dialogue and respectful disagreement. Halakha has been the traditional language of the Jewish world for many centuries, and the ability to converse about halakhic matters facilitates greater understanding while forcing one to sharpen his/her own perspective. Conversely, a lack of knowledge can lead to the (frequently

unnecessary) delegitimization of others, with people not even realizing that there’s another legitimate option out there. This is especially true if one includes (as one should) scholars from the full range of the halakhic community, without excluding anyone for his ideological stances on, say, Zionism or secular studies. Admittedly, not all opinions expressed in popular dialogue are well grounded in traditional sources. Yet one cannot coherently exclude a position if there is no shared language for the conversation. Q: Where do the questions that are featured in your book come from? A: Many of the questions were submitted by readers and staff of the Jerusalem Post, where I write the “Ask the Rabbi” column. Other questions originated from conversations I had with students and friends, who wanted deeper knowledge of Jewish legal perspectives on current events. Q: Which books are you currently reading? A: I’m thinking a lot these days about what makes humans unique in light of the finding of contemporary neuroscience and evolutionary biology. These questions have many legal implications in areas like criminal law and animal rights, and I think the Torah has a lot to say in response to these questions. Three helpful books that I’m reading include: “The Gap” by Thomas Suddendorf, “The Difference of Man and the Difference it Makes” by Mortimer Adler, and “Who’s in Charge? Free Will and the Science of the Brain” by Michael Gazzaniga. “A GUIDE TO THE COMPLEX” IS THE NEWEST RELEASE FROM MAGGID BOOKS, A DIVISION OF KOREN PUBLISHERS JERUSALEM. IT IS AVAILABLE ONLINE AND AT YOUR LOCAL JEWISH BOOKSTORE.

BY STEPHANIE LEWIS l HUMOR

mazel &

mishagoss

Board Games with a Jewish Twist! Parker Brothers changed to Parker Stein. Let’s play!

TRIVIAL DISPUTE

For Jewish grandmas. Object: Become the family matriarch! Play “The Guilt Card!” (bottom of deck) Remind everyone you grew up pre-cellular with scars on your wrist from wearing a watch. Use your free, “Because I said so” pass when losing. Use “I told you so” coupons when your opponent’s face “freezes that way” because you predicted it would. Always win because “life’s not fair.” Grandkids should learn this!

MASHUGANOPOLY

Certain family members we gently label “quirky.” Actually these relatives put many a shrink’s children through college. In this maddeningly slow game, wearily drag your little pewter Prozac token around the board, taking a ride on the Megillah Railroad. If you land on Mishagoss Minyan, do not pass out (just have a simple nervous breakdown) and do not collect a 200 mg Valium prescription.

CHUTZPA & LADDERS

Opponents act assertive, but are actually rude and nervy, ie: ordering appetizers, filet mignon, dessert & splitting the check. Oh, and ladders are irrelevant. Ever see a Jew on a ladder?!

HANDYLAND

Older Jewish men hate this version of

Candyland. Wives cheer. Play commences with a “Honey-Do” list females impatiently hand their mates. A timer is set. Maybe for a week. Various foreign objects appear: hammers, screws, picture-hanging kits, toilet plungers, a simple, Do-It-Yourself bookshelf from Ikea. Game ends once Jewish males (with advanced degrees) throw tools on floor, using profanity. Champions are declared when someone smugly googles, “Christopher, The Gentile House Doctor.” Note: A wife can and should win this game.

AFFLICTIONARY

Forget Pictionary! Be the first to draw what hurts you. Your partner won’t guess your ailment; instead she’ll out-sketch and out-kvetch you. Draw a pair of aching feet, and she’ll say, “You think that’s bad? Here! Lemme doodle bunions, hammertoes and my fallen arches. You believe I’m this artistic on an empty stomach? That’s right, I haven’t eaten since lunch!” An earlier, discontinued red plastic square version of this game called, “Etch-a-Kvetch” annoyed Jews. They couldn’t make curved lines to depict their stones. Every Jewish person has stones; gall and kidney.

YUTZ-EE

Yiddish Yahtzee! Noisily rattle dice in a jar until the opponent with the least haimish expression on their punim tells you to knock off that racket. It’s your cue to yell, “Putzee!,” actually a bad word for a male body part, but an easy way to insult someone by pretending you forgot the name of this

game. Menopausal Jewish women who ask, “Is it hot in here, or is it just me?” can holler “Shvitz-ee!” instead.

JEW’S CLUES

Miss Scarlet’s a “JAP” especially with this Gold Digger edition. Watch out Professor Plumberg and other male players; she’s conspiring with her gal pal suspects. The crime? Lethal male bashings with Colonel (Living) Trustard in the Ballroom with The Mouth; a deadlier weapon than her newly manicured fingernails.

TRAGIC 8 BALL

The Magic 8 Ball (as you remember) with prophetic answers to earth-shattering calamities. Ask, “Will my son marry that Shiksa he’s dating?” and “Doesn’t anybody ask a Bubbe for advice anymore?” No they don’t, Bubbe. They ask the Tragic 8 Ball now. I’d race you to ‘Toys ‘R Us’ and back home (uphill both ways) except I’ve got a backache, a migraine, and I’m dehydrated. See? I always win at Afflictionary! STEPHANIE D. LEWIS IS A SINGLE MOTHER OF SIX AND A REGULAR CONTRIBUTING WRITER FOR THE HUFFINGTON POST. SHE IS A HUMORIST AT ONCE UPON YOUR PRIME (THEQUOTEGAL.WORDPRESS.COM) AND HAS A PUBLISHED NOVEL CALLED “LULLABIES & ALIBIS.” SHE CAN BE REACHED AT THEQUOTEGAL@YAHOO.COM.

WWW.LCHAIMMAGAZINE.COM

L’CHAIM l BY STEPHANIE D. LEWIS

Rock-a-Bye (Beth Am)

Baby!

Synagogue’s latest offerings for children of all ages

top the press and hold the cradle! There are some very huge (or tiny, depending on your point of view) developments happening at Congregation Beth Am. Nowadays, an infant can do far more than just “sleep like a baby.” A brand new program called “The Nursery” provides young infants and toddlers with the basic building blocks of early education through a warm and nurturing environment based on spiritual values, Jewish culture, and longtime traditions. During a recent visit, I lamented that my own six children were no longer young enough to register for this incredibly comprehensive curriculum that will run around the calendar year (no summer closures!) with the flexible option of convenient operating hours (7:30 a.m.–5:30 p.m.) so that working parents can tailor this program around their daily schedule. Denise Neifeld and Tammy Marcus (Director and Assistant Director of Beth Am Preschool, respectively) radiated love, pride, and tremendous efficiency as they 30

L’CHAIM SAN DIEGO MAGAZINE • FEBRUARY 2015

toured me around the cheerful, homey, and stimulating environment. I was in awe as they described in detail how much care and time will be devoted to the six babies who range in age from three–14 months. With a student to instructor ratio of 3:1 (the state licensing ratio is actually 4:1) each miniature “student” (or bundle of joy) is sure to reap tons of personalized attention and plenty of cuddles from the highly experienced and affectionate teachers who specialize in this age group. Each of the six infants will have his/ her own crib, sheets, and two food storage areas, one for room temperature items and the other for refrigerated dishes. Also of utmost importance: the daily sanitization of toys and sterilization of changing tables directly after each diaper change. Activities include story time, artistic creations, play exploration, language discovery and cooking; but no program specializing in young children can be considered complete without music. “The Nursery” will be exposing tiny ears to a

wide variety of rhythms, including both lively and soothing Judaic songs, which will be played throughout each day. A devoted music specialist has been brought on staff expressly to unlock the creative spirit and strengthen the mind of these young children. “The Nursery” has impeccable standards and an aesthetically pleasing classroom and playground outfitted with carefully chosen equipment designed to promote healthy development and encourage exploration. But, there is an entire realm that cannot be seen or photographed for this article. It’s the loving spirit that comes alive here as Neifeld speaks to me. As a mother, I was extraordinarily impressed with the all-pervasive philosophy and the commitment that children always come first. Each is celebrated for their unique qualities and encouraged to reach their own potential in a play-based setting. Indeed, all of the distinctly important pillars of social, emotional, physical, cognitive, and spiritual development are being mindfully

PHOTOS COURTESY BETH AM

L’CHAIM

tapped into through carefully designed components that are the cornerstones of “The Nursery. “ Mothers and fathers are yet another strong focus at Congregation Beth Am. Every parent who has ever dropped their small child off for the first time in a new program is familiar with the varied range of emotions that can overwhelm at first. Well, the empathetic faculty at “The Nursery” has got you covered! Bringing in a comfort object or photos of family members (to be shared with children throughout the day) is just the beginning of the assimilation process here. With thorough daily communication (both verbal and written) an open-door parental visitation policy, classroom involvement opportunities, and a “veteran parent buddy” (that will be paired with each first-time mommy or daddy) adjustment is sure to be as easy as “taking candy from a baby.” Heather Wolfson (who also has a child in the three-year-old preschool class) will be the designated Room Parent for “The Nursery.” Her son Gabe is one of the inaugural infants who will make up the class of 2020. Indeed, even though “The

Nursery” is technically only a month long commitment, the majority of happy babies are certain to hang out at this synagogue for many years, enjoying a comprehensive program that enriches their lives, from 8 weeks until kindergarten. This is endearingly referred to as being “a Beth Am Lifer” by the smiling staff. With unique evening talks on a variety of parenting topics, constant communication between the families and staff, an appointed “Parent Ambassador” and even a customized Instagram group (offering a sneak peak into your child’s day with photos and captions secured with password and parental permission) it’s easy to see how devoted “The Nursery” is to the crucial partnership that exists between the program and the family unit as a whole. If families have children in the regular preschool, they’ll be treated to another wonderfully innovative experience at Congregation Beth Am known as the “Gardening and Nutrition” program. There are many important components integrated into this new program.

Weaving ecological and tikkun olam concepts throughout the various themes and topics that are taught, children will learn the importance of taking care of our environment and keeping their bodies healthy, all while the idea of tzedakah is instilled. The three, four, and five year old classes will have weekly small group lessons with a master gardener in the outdoor classroom. Hands-on gardening experiences include cultivating a large assortment of fruits, vegetables, herbs, and flowers. This helps children understand where our foods originate from and how important they are for good health. Best of all, the students will make and eat a variety of dishes that incorporate all these fresh ingredients. To honor the commitment of bettering the world, the children prepare baskets of their harvest to deliver to others, including the neighborhood fire station. Among the other varied offerings at Beth Am are a Hebrew immersion and a Spanish immersion program. Both are after school add-on options and both are 99% led in their respected languages. Class time will include music, movement, drama, art and literature with the Spanish afternoons also infusing baking/cooking and playground time into the learning environment. Again, I yearn to turn the clock back so I can register my children in all this wonder. But it’s not too late for you and your child! “The Nursery” has a rolling admission policy, which means there is a monthto month contract and open spots may become available at any time, with priority given to synagogue members. For further information or questions, please call (858) 481-2893. STEPHANIE D. LEWIS IS A SINGLE MOTHER OF SIX AND A REGULAR CONTRIBUTING WRITER TO THE HUFFINGTON POST. SHE IS A HUMORIST AT ONCE UPON YOUR PRIME (WWW. THEQUOTEGAL.WORDPRESS.COM) AND HAS A PUBLISHED NOVEL CALLED, “LULLABIES & ALIBIS.” SHE CAN BE REACHED AT THEQUOTEGAL@YAHOO. COM.

WWW.LCHAIMMAGAZINE.COM

HEADLINES

NEWS

TO KNOW

NOW WHAT WE’RE TALKING ABOUT

The Creative Catalyst program was founded three years ago by the San Diego Foundation, which came up with the idea of funding artists directly. Since 2012, the program has awarded $485,000 to 25 artists—ranging from puppeteers to pop musicians. Each of the 2015 recipients will receive $20,000 to work on a project that goes beyond just being a work of art.

The event will feature a discussion of the book Housekeeping by Marilynne Robinson and a catered lunch. Cost is $18. The BNC helps support students, libraries, research and laboratories at Brandeis University, and as this is the book all incoming freshmen read last fall, the chapter is sharing their experience. There will be a DVD presentation by the author and a discussion of the book. The public is invited. Please contact Dorothy at (760) 942-1941 for more information.

YALE STROM WINS CREATIVE CATALYST GRANT

Yale Strom, the accomplished violinist, composer, filmmaker, writer, photographer and playwright whose new work, “Chagall” is expected to premiere at the La Jolla Playhouse in 2015, is one of 10 recipients of the Creative Catalyst Grant for 2015.

Strom’s project, “Common Chords Extreme!” is sponsored by the San Diego Repertory Theatre, and aims to bring chamber music to two Somali and Chaldean refugee groups in San Diego through a string quartet (performed by the Hausmann String Quartet) and a jazz quintet (Tripp Sprague Jazz Quintet) using Somali and Chaldean folk tunes.

BRANDEIS STUDY GROUP

The San Dieguito Chapter of the Brandeis National Committee will present a special edition of their Contemporary Literature study group at the Carlsbad Library, 1775 Dove Lane in Carlsbad on Wednesday, Feb. 18 at 12:30 p.m.

JCO NEWS

The Jewish Collaborative of San Diego (JCo) recently dedicated its new facility in Carlsbad by hanging a mezuzah on each doorpost. “As we hung the mezuzot on each doorpost, we collaboratively decided what we don’t want to enter our doorways: gossip, greed, jealousy, hate and anger. We then blessed our new home with the things we’d like for it to be filled with: love, joy, kids, companionship, friendship, God, understanding, compassion and spirituality. By taking the moment to dedicate our space, we took the moment to decide who we are as a community and what kind of home we’d like to have. The new JCo facility is now a place of love, warmth, and community,” a press release from the synagogue and spiritual center said. The group also celebrates the opening of its own BBYO chapter for 8- 12th grade students. BBYO, the Bnai Brith Youth Organization, is an amazing experience for Jewish teens. To get your child on JCo’s BBYO mailing list, please contact Elizabeth Jacobson at ejzippy@yahoo. com.

L’CHAIM SAN DIEGO MAGAZINE • FEBRUARY 2015

HEADLINES

Soldiers on tour in San Diego are Ashager and Eyal. Ashager was born in Gnodar Ethiopia and moved to Israel as part of “Operation Solomon” in 1991. She began her military service in the IDF as an instructor in the M.L.R.S. artillery force, and later continued as an officer’s instructor in the Paratroopers Reconnaissance Battalion. Ashager has participated in a number of delegations around the world including one to South Africa during “Israeli Apartheid Week” last year. An Alumnus of the 2013 StandWithUs Israel Fellowship, Ashager is currently a third year Government, Diplomacy, and Strategy student at the Interdisciplinary Center in Herzliya.

Saturday services and Kiddush luncheon will be followed by a Lunch & Learn titled “What it’s like living in Mexico as a Jew.” The Lunch & Learn is free and open to the community, but an R.S.V.P. is requested to make sure there will be enough food. On Sunday, guest musician Jonathan Valverde will sing Tzel Umei Be’er, as part of a concert entitled “Israel in Song” at 3:30 p.m. Tickets are on sale now, and are $18 per adult and $10 per senior (65+) or student (ID required). You can purchase tickets at the door: $25 per adult; student and senior pricing stays the same. For more information, call the synagogue at (858) 4818454.

STANDIWTHUS PRESENTS “ISRAELI SOLDIERS STORIES”

StandWithUs’ “Israeli Soldiers Stories” (ISS) is once again coming to San Diego February 16-18. This is an innovative program where IDF soldiers relay their personal experiences of upholding the strict IDF moral code while fighting an enemy that hides behind its civilians. They also speak about their backgrounds, life in Israel and answer questions for members of each audience while putting a human face to the IDF uniform.

Eyal was a team commander in the IDF Officers Course and served as the head of the International Infrastructural Projects Department at The Civil Administration of Judea and Samaria (COGAT). During operation “Protective Edge,” Eyal assisted in COGAT’s efforts in providing humanitarian aid to the people of Gaza. Upon graduating university with a Law degree, Eyal was a Visiting Research Fellow at the University of Cologne and on the editorial board of Law Review at his home university. Eyal graduated the StandWithUs 2012 Israel Fellowship at Bar Ilan University.

BETH AM PARTNERS WITH MEXICO CITY SYNAGOGUE

Congregation Beth Am will partner with Congregation Beth El in Mexico City to present a weekend of services and activities, Friday, March 13-Sunday, March 15. The weekend’s events kick off Friday night with services and dinner, with price for dinner to be announced.

As part of the soldiers’ schedules, they will appear Tuesday, February 17, at the SDSU Student Union, hosted by Aztecs for Israel, at 7 p.m. (This event is open to the community.) More info can be found at standwithus.com/Campus/t/t103. asppid=57#.VLQQ_r6Jm5Q. WWW.LCHAIMMAGAZINE.COM

L’CHAIM SAN DIEGO MAGAZINE • FEBRUARY 2015

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