M A N D Y N O LA N ’S
SOAPBOX
W W W . E C H O . N E T. A U /
S O A P - B OX
THAT OLD TRIGGER
‘What is it about women that makes some men so violent?’ This was the question posed by a letter to the editor in The Echo last week. The letter appeared the very same week as White Ribbon Day – the International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women – and instead of acknowledging a fatal flaw in male culture, and asking how can men can unite to address the devastating impact of toxic masculinity, the question is asked of us women, or to be precise, what ‘some’ of us have done to make men hurt us. It suggests that the onus of behavioural responsibility lies not with the perpetrator of violence but with the victim. The writer asks, ‘What is it about women that triggers these men?’ This small twist of language makes the injured, sexually assaulted, or dead woman the perpetrator of the violence she suffers, and the violent abusing man the victim. A poor man forced to resort to violence to restore his sense of power owing to his lack of control over a woman’s agency. I read this in the same sitting I read the story about sports star Jarryd Hayne allegedly biting a 26-year-old woman so hard on the vagina she was left with such profuse bleeding she required medical attention. With this framework in play, one would have to ask what she did to trigger this behaviour. How did this woman spending a quiet night at home with her mother trigger a man suburbs away to allegedly drink for hours on end, get a taxi to her house, ask it to wait for 20 minutes, bite her viciously, and then take his taxi from Newcastle back to Sydney? What did SHE do to make him do that? Did she not want to sleep with him? Did she break his heart? Did she make a joke about him being a terrible lover? At what point in the story could he lose his agency and find his teeth cutting through her softest most intimate parts? Thanks to patriarchy men enjoy privilege that no woman has ever known. It’s a privilege of never fearing that your partner may one day kill you. That you can walk to your car in a dark carpark without fear of rape. Or being touched in your workplace. Of complaining and not being believed. Or being believed and no-one caring, because you probably did something to trigger it anyway. Is losing privilege THE trigger for male violence? Is that why we are seeing such a spike in violence against women? The writer of the letter to the editor goes on to say that a possible reason for male violence is that ‘women lose their looks as they age. Men marry a beautiful girl; by and by her beauty disappears. It’s not surprising some men feel betrayed.’ According to this mindset our natural human biology is a justifiable trigger for a man to cause us harm. Our value, unlike men’s, is diminished over time and the loss of our youth is a betrayal? A betrayal of what? Is our ageing HIS loss of property value? Does he lose the measure of masculinity by what he perceives as the diminishing value of the woman he ‘owns’? Does the ‘beauty’ of women belong to men? Is it a currency some men use to compete with other men? Do ugly women deserve to be harmed? Is this why botox has become such a growth industry? To stop men killing us for being ugly? When did what a woman’s physical appearance become a reason for a man’s behaviour? If this same ‘trigger’ of the disappointment of your bloke becoming old, fat, and ugly was used to justify violence against men by women there’d barely be a bloke left over the age of 30. There are no justifiable triggers for violence against women. However this letter did tempt me to stage a one-woman protest in the street of the writer. I was considering perhaps hiring a water cannon, and then when arrested and the police drag me from the scene I can shout, ‘It’s not my fault! He triggered me!’ Oh dear, they’ll say. Just another old ugly woman making men violent.
www.echo.net.au/byron-echo Byron Shire Echo archives
LIVE MUSIC
ENTERTAINMENT
RETURN TO EDEN
Karise Eden’s voice can move a nation. She shot to fame at the age of 19 with a viral audition video that now has over 36 million views on YouTube and which then catapulted her debut album to break sales and chart history. Her debut album My Journey shot straight to #1 on the national ARIA Chart, was certified double platinum, and went on to become the biggest-selling album by
an Australian artist in 2012. Karise’s second album Things I’ve Done charted at #6 on the ARIA Chart, achieved gold sales status and was followed up by sold-out shows around the country. Karise released her third album in late November starting with the first single Temporary Lovers. She plays the Ballina RSL on Saturday. 8.30pm. $30.
HOAD TRIP After a huge year touring through Europe multi-instrumentalist Jay Hoad is back in Oz and set to play a few local gigs before he heads off on the festival circuit. Says Jay, ‘I’m very excited about this year’s tour – so many cool locations and festivals on the various legs – and really excited to bring the new tunes and instruments to the fans around the world. My favourite instrument on this tour is probably the new Industrial Punk Guitar, which is made from car and motorcycle parts, gas bottles, etc and sounds incredible! But that may all
change when these new guitars are finished later next month. I’ve been working on plenty of new material and am so excited to drop some of these new tracks at these shows. See you guys soon!’ He is at the Rails in Byron Bay on Thursday, Lennox Hotel on Friday, Saturday at the Sheoak Shack in Fingal, and Sunday at the Sphinx Rock Cafe in Mt Burrell.
HELP DURRUMBUL RUMBLE THE NBN
SONGS THAT CHANGED OUR COUNTRY: RAGGEDY POETS OF SOCIAL JUSTICE With their instantly recognisable vocal styles, their incisive but elegantly poetic lyricism and their lifelong commitment to a tolerant, compassionate Australia, Shane Howard and John Schumann are two of the most influential singer/songwriters this country has ever produced. They have created songs that changed Australia. Shane is best known for his leadership of Goanna and his powerful, evocative statement on the plight of Indigenous Australia, Solid Rock. John is famed for Redgum and his compelling Vietnam Veteran’s anthem I was only 19. Both Shane and John continue to enjoy substantial careers, decades after their leadership of the bands that made them famous. Their uncompromising stance on a wide range of important sociopolitical issues over decades may not have endeared them to the establishment, but the raggedy poets have the respect of the country. John, Shane, and the Red Rocking Dirt Band present Songs that Changed Our Country at the Byron Theatre at the Community Centre on Wednesday. 8pm. Tix are $42–45 at www.byroncentre.com.au.
Opposition to the 45m NBN tower at Durrumbul is being brought into focus this Saturday 1 December with some famous musos and barefoot dancing being the highlight of the event at Durrumbul Hall in Main Arm. ‘The Fields of Healing celebration inspired us to protect our environment from pollution,’ said one of the organisers. Starting at 2pm there will be Indigenous musicians warming the ground before a great mix of live music and DJs take to the stage. The event is highlighting the danger of the microwave radiation that the tower will emit over the community, local school and preschool, and community gathering space. They are raising money to fight against the imposition of the NBN tower that is slated to transmit over the birthplace of alternative culture in the region. ‘We are calling for Byron Shire Council to stop this environmental pollution and to stop the tower at Durrumbul,’ said organisers. So get your kids together, your dancing feet on, and maybe even bring a picnic (or enjoy the food and drink available for sale), and enjoy music from Shelbi, the Vaggaphonics and DJs Short Circuit, Big Foot and Strange Planet with plenty of surprises along the way. Tickets are $20 on the door.
CONTINUED P34
DURRUMBUL HALL DOOFIN FUNDRAISER SATURDAY 1ST DECEMBER SHORTCIRCUIT BIG FOOT STRANGE PLANET All profits going towards protecting Durrumbul Hall and surrounds from dangerous pollutants. Please come along for more information.
2pm till 12am $20 entry@door Food n Chai
mşưĕŔćĕſ ǩǯǽ ǩǧǨǯ The Byron Shire Echo 33