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4HE 5NIVERSAL #HURCH AND THE 3ACRED 3OURCE 4WO -EMOIRS ) /N THE 5NIVERSAL #HURCH 7ILSON 6AN $USEN

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GREW INTO SPIRITUALITY AS AN INFANT AT THE AGE OF ONE ) STILL REMEMBER ITˆ) WAS LYING IN THE CRIB AND AS ) TURNED SIDEWAYS SUNLIGHT WAS COM ING IN THROUGH A WINDOW AND MOTES OF DUST WERE m OATING IN THE LIGHT

AND AS THEY TURNED THEY GAVE OFF RAINBOW COLORS !ND ) WENT INTO A KIND OF ECSTASY ABOUT THE BEAUTY OF THE WORLD %VER SINCE THEN ) HAVEN T NEEDED ALL THE DOCTRINE AND ALL THE NIT PICK ING THINGS TO HAVE THE EXPERIENCE OF 'OD ) VE NEVER HAD SPIRITUAL TRAINING

CHURCH TRAINING RELIGIOUS TRAINING OF ANY SORT %VEN AFTER ) JOINED CHURCHES AND BECAME ACTIVE IN THE 3WEDENBORGIAN #HURCH SPIRITUALITY HAS ALWAYS BEEN A KIND OF PRIVATE DIRECT WAY FOR ME 7HAT ) NEED IS TO BE LEFT ALONE

TAKING MY TIME AND ) LOOK TO SEE WHAT IS PRESENT AND WHAT IS LEADING ME OR SPEAKING TO ME INWARDLY OR INTUITIVELY AND ) M BACK TO THE DIRECT EXPE RIENCE OF 'OD 4HAT S HOW ) DID IT AS AN ADOLESCENT )T JUST HAPPENED OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN AND IT STILL WORKS FOR ME )T S STAYED WITH ME ALL DURING MY LIFE ) VE NEVER HOOKED MY EXPERIENCES ONTO ANY OF EARTH S REPRESENTATIONS OF 'OD ) COULD SAY THAT IN A WAY ALL THE WAYS THAT THE RELIGIONS REPRESENT 'OD ARE OKAY BY ME OR NONE ARE OKAYˆIT AMOUNTS TO THE SAME THING &OR ME THERE IS NO ONE RIGHT WAY TO REPRESENT 'OD ) DON T THINK OF ANY EARTHLY REPRESENTATION AS h4HIS IS THE ONE ) M TALKING TO v ) CONSIDER MYSELF A MEM BER OF ALL RELIGIONS ) HAVE KNOWN FOR A LONG TIME THAT ) AM OF THE 5NIVERSAL #HURCH WHICH IS NOT A PARTICULAR STRUCTURE ANYWHERE )T IS EVERYWHERE !ND ) VE LEARNED THAT IN MY READING ) CAN WALK WITH SPIRITUAL PEOPLE OF ALL TIMES ALL PLACES ALL RELIGIONS !MONG ALL THE RELIGIONS ) CONSIDER "UDDHISM TO BE ONE OF THE HIGHEST BECAUSE OF ITS STRESS ON PRACTICE ! "UDDHIST CAN AVOID THE ERROR OF DOCTRI >HHJ: D8ID7:G

7ILSON 6AN $USEN

NAL BULLSHIT ) BELIEVE WITH THE "UDDHISTS THAT SPIRITUAL PRACTICE IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING A PERSON CAN DO )T IS EDUCATION IN THE WISDOM OF LIFE ITSELF 9OU CANNOT SPEND TIME WITH 'OD WITHOUT BECOMING WISER .OW AT THE END OF MY LIFE ) CONSIDER MYSELF A #HRISTIAN AND A "UDDHIST AS WELL -Y OWN FRIENDS THINK THAT S IMPOSSIBLE "UT ) DON T SEE ANY PROBLEM BEING BOTH OR BEING A MEMBER OF ALL CHURCHES OR BEING SYMPATHETIC TO ALL AND TRYING TO SEE WHAT GOOD IS IN EACH 7HAT IS IMPORTANT IS NOT DOCTRINE BUT 7HAT IS IMPORTANT IS NOT HOW PEOPLE USE RELIGION ) ASK 7HAT IS THEIR OUTLOOK 7HAT ARE THEY TRYING TO DO (OW DO THEY ACHIEVE THEIR DOCTRINE BUT HOW PEOPLE ENDS 4HE POINT IS NOT WHICH RELIGION IS RIGHT BUT HOW EACH ONE FUNCTIONS IN OUR LIVES 7OULDN T IT BE A WONDER USE RELIGION IF RELIGION WERE REALLY BEST UNDERSTOOD AS A HUMAN EN TERPRISE 4HIS IS NOT TO SAY THAT 'OD DOESN T EXIST ONLY THAT THE 'OD OF OUR LIVES MIGHT BE MORE APPROACHABLE )F 'OD IS THE !LL THAT SURELY INCLUDES US 3WEDENBORG SAYS THAT WHEN THE ,ORD LOOKS AT CHURCHES HE SEES ONLY ONE )T IS EVIDENT THAT THERE ARE MANY AND PERHAPS INl NITELY MANY SPIRITUAL PATHS 3PIRITUALITY BURSTS UPON SOME IT COMES SLOWLY TO OTHERS SOME NEED MANY APPROACHES OTHERS NEED TRAUMA 4HERE ARE AS MANY PATHS AS THERE ARE PEOPLE 4HIS RATHER PUTS THE LIE TO THE IDEA THAT SOME HAVE FOUND THE RIGHT AND TRUE 0ATH 7HY "ECAUSE 'OD MAKES EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING DISTINCT AND UNIQUE 7E LIVE AMONG A TERRIBLE ABUNDANCE OF RELIGIOUS IDEAS

WITH RELIGIOUS HAWKERS SHOUTING AND PROMOTING THEIR VIEWS 'OD SEEMS MORE m EXIBLE THAN THEY ARE BEING EVERYWHERE AT ONCE AND DOING ALL THINGS SIMULTANEOUSLY 4HE EXPERIENCE OF 'OD IS IMMENSELY PLEASANT AND ELEVATING 9OU FORGET YOURSELF YOU FEEL THAT YOU RE NOT ANYTHING AT ALL !ND YOU SEE INTO THE LIFE OF ALL THINGS 4HE PERCEPTION IS NOT THROUGH THE EYES IT S HERE IN THE BRAIN )T S INTUITIVE )T ARISES FROM ME IT S IN ME BECAUSE 'OD IS IN ALL THINGS ) REALIZE THAT THIS EXPERIENCE HAS BEEN GIVEN TO ME AND THAT IT S A GREAT GIFT -ANY PEOPLE STRUGGLE ALL THEIR LIVES AND MAYBE HAVE THIS EXPERIENCE ONCE ) VE HAD IT HUNDREDS OF TIMES THOUSANDS OF TIMES )T IS AS THOUGH IN THESE VISITS ) HAVE BEEN INVITED INTO 'OD S HOUSE !ND SINCE ) VE BEEN THERE ) HAVE SOME IDEA OF HOW HE MADE ALL THINGS )T S AN HONOR TO BE IN 'OD S HOUSE ) KNOW THAT !ND ) DON T ORDINARILY TELL PEOPLE ABOUT IT BECAUSE THEY WOULDN T UNDERSTAND )N NO WAY DOES THIS MAKE ME SUPERIOR TO OTHER PEOPLE IN FACT

) OFTEN FEEL THAT IT MAKES ME AT THE SAME LEVEL AS EVERYTHING ELSE AS PLANTS AND ANIMALS AS BUGSˆANYTHING ) M AT THE SAME LEVEL OF ALL THINGS ALL LIFE ) VE HAD THAT FEELING SINCE CHILDHOOD 7HEN ) DEAL WITH THE CAT OR WITH THE PLANTS AND m OWERS ) FEEL THAT THEY ARE THE SAME AS ME ) LOVE TO DO SPIRITUAL RESEARCH ) GET AN IDEA AND ) TRACK IT DOWN UNTIL ) CAN ANSWER IT IN TERMS OF THE TRADITIONS ) LIKE BEING A SPIRITUAL SCHOLAR

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/N THE 5NIVERSAL #HURCH

SEARCHING AND ) WRITE PAPERS TO MYSELFÂ&#x2C6;NOT TO ANYONE ELSEÂ&#x2C6;BESIDES WHAT ) HAVE PUBLISHED PAPERS AND TEN BOOKS /NCE SOMETHING IS CLEAR IN MY HEAD IT IS VERY EASY FOR ME TO SET IT DOWN !ND IT S DEEP IN ME THAT ) WANT TO MAKE THINGS CLEAR FOR OTHERS 7HEREVER ) VE GONE IN LIFE ) VE ENDED UP TEACHING 4HE "OY 3COUTS THE MERCHANT MARINE THE #OAST 'UARD IN MY CAREER AS A PSYCHOLOGIST AND ) WAS A NAVAL OFl CER FOR SIXTEEN YEARS MOSTLY IN THE RESERVESÂ&#x2C6;) VE HAD A BUSY LIFE IN THE WORLD AND IN ALL THESE THINGS ) VE ENDED UP TEACHING NOT USUALLY ABOUT SPIRITUALITY BUT ABOUT WHATEVER WAS AT HAND ) NEVER SAY THAT 'OD HAS THIS OR THAT FORM UNLESS TO SAY (E HAS ALL FORMS 4O SEE 'OD IN A SPECIl C FORM BLINDS ONE TO HIM AS HE IS IN OTHER FORMS ) DON T CONSIDER HIM TO BE A PERSON EITHER ALTHOUGH HE HAS CERTAIN PERSONAL ASPECTS (E HAS A CONSCIOUSNESS THAT IS AWARE OF ITSELF !ND THERE ARE LEVELS OF KNOWING ) M WELL AWARE OF THIS ) SEE MYSELF AS A SORT OF BAD MIRROR ) M ONLY PARTLY REm ECTING 'OD WHEN ) SPEAK OF THESE THINGS ) ONCE SAW

IN ONE OF MY VISIONS A "UDDHIST STUPA ) WAS THAT STUPA AND AS ) CLIMBED THE STUPA ) BECAME AWARE OF LEVELS OF UNDERSTANDING HIGHER AND HIGHER 3O ) KNOW THAT ) M DEALING WITH LEVELS THAT ARE WAY WAY BEYOND ME 3TILL

) KNOW THAT 'OD HAS GIVEN ME LOWLY CONSIDERATION AND HAS LET ME INTO HIS HOUSE TO SEE HOW HE LIVES 7HAT ) CAN SEE IS 'OD S INTENT FOR THE UNIVERSE )T SHOWS EVERYWHERE

IN EVERYTHING )T S ALWAYS IN PLACE )T S ALWAYS WORKING 9OU LOOK AT A PLANT AND YOU CAN SEE THAT ITS INTENT IS TO MAKE SEEDS TO MAKE m OWERS TO ATTRACT THE BEES WHO WILL FERTILIZE MORE PLANTS "UT WHAT IT IS MORE THAN THAT IS SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL AND ALIVE SOMETHING THAT SHOWS OFF LIFE ITSELF 4HE INTENT IS ALWAYS THERE AND IT S APPARENT IF YOU LOOK FOR IT 7HEN ) AM IN THE INNER EXPERIENCE ) CAN LOOK OUT AND SEE 'OD EVERYWHERE )F ) HAD THE TASK OF TEACHING OTHERS ABOUT 'OD ) WOULD USE THE EXPERIENCE OF BEAUTY OF FEELING ) WOULD USE MUSIC AND LET THEM l ND IT THAT WAY &OR EXAMPLE ON THE WALLS OF MY STUDY ) HAVE A SERIES OF REPRODUCTIONS OF VARIOUS PAINTINGS THAT SPEAK OF THE FEELING OF BEING CLOSE TO A WARM HOME 4HIS IS CLOSE TO THE FEELING OF 'OD %VERYONE HAS THE ABILITY TO EXPERIENCE THAT FEELING BUT FEW MAKE IT CONSCIOUS 4O TEACH PEOPLE HOW TO EXPERIENCE 'OD ) D HAVE THEM LOOK AT PAINTINGS AND SEE THE ORDER IN THEM "ECAUSE 'OD IS ORDER %VERYTHING IS IN ITS PLACE LIKE IN THE GARDENÂ&#x2C6;THE GREATER AND THE SMALLER !NYONE WHO RESPECTS ANYTHING IN 'OD S ORDER ALREADY HAS AN UNDERSTANDING OF SPIRITUALITY 3UCH A PERSON MAY HAVE NO REAL SENSE OF 'OD BUT HE S ALREADY WORSHIPING THE ORDER AND HE LL BE SAVED BY THIS AND WILL GO TO HEAVEN )T ISN T NECESSARY TO SEE 'OD AS A PERSON )T CAN BE RESPECT AND LOVE OF THE ORDER ) SEE THIS WORLD AS A SCHOOL WITH A VERY CAREFULLY DESIGNED CURRICULUM 4HERE IS NOTHING CARELESS ABOUT IT WE RE BEING MADE INTO WHAT WE RE BE >HHJ: D8ID7:G

7ILSON 6AN $USEN

COMING 3PIRITUAL PEOPLE SEE THE ORDER OF THINGS 7E SEE THERE IS A 'OD

AND WE SEE THERE S NO CHANCE IN ANYTHING NOT THE TINIEST BIT OF CHANCE !

SPARROW DOES NOT FALL OUT OF THE TREE WITHOUT 'OD KNOWING IT (E CAUSED IT AND FOR A PURPOSE ) SEE THE SPIRITUAL PERSON AS LUCKILY HAVING BEEN SHOWN 'OD S ORDER BECAUSE HE OR SHE WANTED TO SEE IT AND CHOOSES TO COME INTO COOPERATION WITH THE ORDER ) AM ONE OF THE ONES WHO COOPERATE WITH THE ORDER OF THINGS AND THAT IS WHAT GETS YOU TO HEAVEN 4HAT IS HEAVEN TO BE ONE WHO SEES THE ORDER AND ENJOYS THE ORDER AND WORKS IN THE ORDER ONE WHO WISHES TO DO SOMETHING IN IT ) PRAY ALL THE TIME BECAUSE ) M ALWAYS WORKING ON SOME KIND OF PROBLEM ) M ALWAYS TALKING TO MY ,ORD 7E HAVE A KIND OF CASUAL COM MUNICATION ) DON T NEED ANY SHOW ) CAN T FOLLOW A CANNED PRAYER )T S ALWAYS SPONTANEOUS RIGHT AT THE MOMENT 3O WE HAVE A KIND OF TALK BUT 'OD MOSTLY SHOWS ME (E DOESN T ANSWER IN WORDS ONLY IN THE INTUITIONS THAT COME BEFORE WORDS 5SUALLY ) M LOOKING FOR SOMETHING AND ) M GIVEN A KIND OF ANSWER ) GET THE FEELING THAT ) M BEING POINTED TOWARDS A PARTICULAR DIRECTION ) VE FELT SINCE CHILDHOOD THAT ) COULD ASK ANY SPIRITUAL QUESTION AND THE ANSWER WOULD BE GIVEN TO ME 2IGHT NOW ) M PROBABLY DYING OF CANCER ) M LIKELY TO DROWN IN MY OWN m UID IN MY LUNGSÂ&#x2C6;A MISERABLE KIND OF DEATH "UT ) SEE THAT IT HAS SOME USE ) CAN LOOK INSIDE IT AND SEE ITS USE AND TALK ABOUT IT ,AST NIGHT WHEN ) PRAYED ) ASKED TO KNOW ABOUT CANCER SINCE THIS IS WHERE ) AM AND ) WANT TO KNOW ABOUT IT !ND ) HAD WONDERFUL VISIONS WHICH 'OD DOESN T ANSWER GAVE ME THE BEGINNINGS OF UNDERSTANDING IT 4HE CANCER IS NOT NORMAL )T S NOT REAL ) M MEANT TO GO TOWARDS THE REAL

IN WORDS ONLY IN THE TOWARDS LIFE TOWARD WHAT IS NOT ILLUSORY 4HE CANCER IS PART OF THE FAKERY THE PRETENSE THAT WE ARE ALL INVOLVED IN #URI OUS )T S FAKE BUT IT S KILLING ME 4HIS WHOLE LAST PHASE OF LIFE INTUITIONS THAT COME IS INTERESTING AND CURIOUS )T S ACTUALLY NO BIG DEAL DYING 3TILL ) M SLATED TO HAVE AN UNPLEASANT DEATH SO ) VE ASKED BEFORE WORDS 'OD TO CHANGE THAT AND TO GIVE ME A GOOD DEATH ) D LIKE TO DIE QUIETLY AT HOME 7HEN ) GET ANSWERS TO MY QUESTIONS THEY COME AS DIRECT INTUITIONS )T S NOT THAT ) HEAR ANYBODY SPEAKING TO ME ) JUST KNOW ) JUST KNOW !ND OFTEN WHEN ) M WORKING ON SOMETHING IN MY WRITING THE INNER PROCESS PARTICIPATES IN MY WRITING ) CAN BE PUZZLED ABOUT HOW TO PRESENT SOME THING AND ) WAKE UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND THERE IT IS IN MY HEAD

REPEATING ITSELF OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN &INALLY ) GET UP AND WRITE DOWN THE BROAD OUTLINES OF WHAT IT S DEPICTINGÂ&#x2C6;OTHERWISE ) STAY AWAKE ALL NIGHT ) GO BACK TO BED AND THE NEXT MORNING ) CAN UNDERSTAND IT AND ) CAN WRITE DIRECTLY FROM IT )T S DIRECT GUIDANCE AS TO HOW ) SHOULD PRESENT

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/N THE 5NIVERSAL #HURCH

THINGS 4HIS KIND OF UNDERSTANDING HAS ALWAYS SEEMED RIGHT TO ME AND IT S ALWAYS A CLARIl CATION AN IMPROVEMENT OVER WHERE ) WAS ) VE HAD A KIND OF OPTIMISM ALL THE WAY FROM INFANCY THAT LITERALLY ) WAS IN CLOSE CONTACT WITH WISDOM ITSELF AND THAT IT WAS A MATTER OF MY FOCUSING ON WHAT ) WANTED TO REALLY KNOW AND IT WOULD SHOW ME ) COULDN T LEARN HOW TO MAKE MONEY OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT NO MUNDANE WORLDLY THINGS 4HEY WERE ALWAYS SPIRITUAL UNDERSTANDINGS &OR MANY YEARS ) MEDITATED BY LOOKING AT A #HRISTIAN ICON WHILE ) WAS ASKING THE BIG QUESTIONS AND WHAT WOULD COME BACK TO ME WAS IN EFFECT 'OD SAYING h) CAN T ANSWER NOW BECAUSE OF YOUR LIMITATIONS 'IVE US BOTH A LITTLE TIME AND ) LL TAKE AWAY YOUR LIMITATIONS AND YOU WILL SEE THE ANSWER v ,ATER ) D LOOK AT THE SAME QUESTION AND THERE WOULD BE AN ANSWER ) HAD MIGRAINE HEADACHES FOR A NUMBER OF YEARS .O MEDICATIONS HELPED ) ACTUALLY CONSIDERED SUICIDE BECAUSE THE PAIN GOT SO BAD -Y SOLU TION WAS TO MEDITATE ON THE PAIN !T l RST IT INTENSIl ED BUT THEN IT DIMINISHED AND DISAPPEARED /NCE ) BEGAN TO MEDITATE ON IT REGULARLY IT WAS CURED )T DISAPPEARED SO FAST THAT ) ALMOST MISSED IT ) REALIZED THAT ) HAD BEEN TOO SCATTERED BEING HERE AND GOING THERE TOO MANY COMMITMENTS WHILE THE PAIN WAS A FOCUS 4HE PAIN S PURPOSE WAS TO DIRECT ME TOWARD MYSELF AND MY CONSCIOUSNESS ) EVEN CONSULTED WITH 'OD ABOUT MY MOTHER S DEATH 3HE DIED HATING 'OD SO ) WAS A LITTLE BIT WORRIED ABOUT HOW SHE WOULD FARE !ND 'OD SAID VERY NICELY THAT BECAUSE SHE HAD BEEN A GOOD MOTHER SHE HAD A CREDIT SO HE GAVE HER AN INTRODUCTION TO THE SPIRITUAL WORLD AS 3WEDENBORG CALLS IT IT S THE l RST WORLD YOU RUN INTO AFTER DEATH WHERE THINGS ARE SORTED OUT AS TO WHERE YOU RE GOING TO GO )N THE SPIRITUAL WORLD MY MOTHER WAS OPENED UP TO EXPERIENCES THAT SHE HAD NEVER HAD HERE EXPERIENCES OF BEAUTY KIND NESS ALL THE GOOD THINGS 3HE HADN T EXPERIENCED THESE SO SHE WAS BITTER AND ANGRY AND SHE WOULD SOMETIMES SAY THAT 'OD MUST BE VERY CRUEL BECAUSE HER LIFE WAS KIND OF CRUEL !ND SO IN THE SPIRITUAL WORLD SHE WAS SHOWN THE ORDER OF THINGS AND THE BEAUTY OF THINGS SO THAT SHE WAS NO LONGER AGAINST 'OD AND SHE WENT TO HEAVEN !ND WHAT WAS SURPRISING TO ME IS THAT MY FATHER IS ALSO IN HEAVEN ) KNOW THIS BECAUSE HE WAS THE ONE WHO CAME TO GUIDE MY MOTHER INTO HEAVEN 7HEN SHE WAS DYING LYING IN BED SHE SAID TO ME h$ID YOU SEE HIM v h7HO v ) HADN T SEEN HIM h9OUR FATHER WAS HERE v 4HAT TOTALLY SURPRISED ME 3HE SAID h) M GLAD HE CAME HE WAS THE ONLY MAN ) EVER LOVED v 3HE WAS DIVORCED FROM HIM FOR MANY YEARS ) CAME TO 3WEDENBORG BEFORE ) READ ANY OTHER #HRISTIAN MYSTIC 4HERE S AN INTERESTING STORY ABOUT THAT -Y PATERNAL GRANDMOTHER WAS A SPIRITUALIST MINISTER CALLING ON THE SPIRITS OF THE DEPARTED TO AID IN COUNSELING PEOPLE ) VISITED HER ONLY A FEW TIMES SO SHE CAN T REALLY BE SAID TO HAVE INm UENCED >HHJ: D8ID7:G

7ILSON 6AN $USEN

ME "UT ) DO REMEMBER ONE DAY WHEN ) WAS STILL A BOY HER POINTING TO A ROW OF RED VOLUMES ON HER l REPLACE SHELF 3HE SAID h4HIS IS ALL YOU EVER NEED TO KNOW AND ) HAVE WILLED THESE TO YOU v 5NFORTUNATELY SHE DIDN T TELL ME THE AUTHOR S NAME .OW MY MOTHER WAS COMPLETELY SKEPTICAL ABOUT ANYTHING BEARING ON RE LIGION 3HE SAID MY GRANDMOTHER TALKED TO SPIRITS BECAUSE SHE COULD NOT HEAR REAL PEOPLE VERY WELL 3HE KNEW THAT MY GRANDMOTHER HAD PRONOUNCED ME HER SPIRITUAL HEIR BUT MY MOTHER CONSIDERED THIS COMPLETELY FOOLISH AND SO WHEN MY GRANDMOTHER DIED HER RED VOLUMES WERE THROWN IN THE TRASH 4HEN ONE DAY YEARS LATER LONG AFTER ) HAD FOUND WORKS BY 3WEDENBORG AND HAD BECAME SOMETHING OF AN EXPERT ON HIM ) SAW A ROW OF RED BOOKS IN A 3WEDENBORGIAN LIBRARY AND MY HAIR STOOD ON END ) KNEW THESE WERE COPIES OF THE SAME VOLUMES THAT MY GRANDMOTHER HAD PROMISED ME 4HEY WERE " & "ARRETT S 4HE 3WEDENBORG ,IBRARY A WORK NO LONGER IN PRINT ) REALIZED THAT SOMEHOW MY GRANDMOTHER HAD MANAGED TO MAKE ME HER SPIRITUAL HEIR

EVEN THOUGH MY PARENTS TRIED TO CUT THE LINK 3WEDENBORG COULD OPEN UP THE DOORS TO HEAVEN AND HELL AND LOOK (E WAS GIVEN THE ABILITY TO LOOK AND SEE AND THEN GIVE IT TO OTHERS IN HIS WRIT INGS WHICH HE DID ) CAME TO ADMIRE HIM BECAUSE HE WAS ONE OF THE SPIRITUAL GIANTS ) M STILL TURNING TO HIM 7HAT 4HE WHOLE EGO THING DID HE SAY ON THIS 7HAT DID HE SAY ON THAT !ND ) GO IN AND l ND IT 3INCE ) VE BEEN IN 'OD S HOUSE AND HAVE A GENERAL IS JUST A SHOW SENSE OF IT ) COULD AGREE WITH 3WEDENBORG S DESCRIPTION OF IT IN (EAVEN AND (ELL WHICH ) CONSIDER TO BE HIS MOST IMPORTANT BOOK (E S MOSTLY GIVING THE TRUTH OF WHAT ) EXPERIENCED ) M WITH 3WEDENBORG TOO IN THAT ) DO SEE ANGELS IN THIS WORLD 3OME TIMES IT S SHOCKINGLY APPARENT TO ME AND THEY VE ALL BEEN VERY COMMON PEOPLE )T HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH WEALTH CLASS TITLE ANYTHING ELSE ) CAN SEE ANGELS AMONG THE PEOPLE IN THE STREET AND PEOPLE WITH BIG TITLES AREN T AMONG THEM 7HAT WILL HAPPEN AFTER ) DIE IS SOMETHING VERY CLEAR TO ME ) HAVE AL WAYS BEEN A TEACHER AND THE TEACHING THAT ) LIKE MOST IS SPIRITUAL 3O ) LL BE SOMEWHERE USING SPIRITUAL UNDERSTANDING TO AID OTHERS ) M ALREADY BEING TRAINED IN THIS AREA SO ) EXPECT TO GO ON 'OD WANTS ME TO CONTINUEÂ&#x2C6;BUT NOT AS MY PRESENT SELF ) DON T ACTUALLY CONSIDER MYSELF TO HAVE A SELF NOT REALLY 4HE WHOLE EGO THING IS A NOTHING )T S JUST A SHOW )T S QUITE TEMPORARY ) KNOW THIS BECAUSE ) VE BEEN ABLE TO COME INTO A KIND OF EXPERIENCE THAT IS TIME TRANSCENDING AND EGO TRANSCENDING $O ) WORRY NOW ABOUT WHETHER 6AN $USEN IS GOING TO BE KNOWN IS GOING TO BE PUBLISHED AND ALL THAT ) SPENT A WHOLE LOT OF TIME ACQUIRING TITLES AND HONORARY DEGREES AND SO ON

AND NOW IT ALL SEEMS LIKE NOTHING TO MEÂ&#x2C6;IT S ALL GOING TO DISAPPEAR ONE DAY

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/N THE 5NIVERSAL #HURCH

AND ) M GLAD 7HY BOTHER 4HERE WAS A TIME WHEN ) WAS MORE EGO ORIENTED ) NEEDED THE EXPERIENCE TO SEE THE USELESSNESS OF IT 4HE WHOLE THING HAS JUST TURNED TO TINSEL LIKE A #HRISTMAS TREE ORNAMENT THAT YOU CAN BREAK IN YOUR HAND AND THROW AWAY 4HE EXPERIENCE OF 'OD LEADS TO HUMILITY BECAUSE 'OD IS ALL AND THE INDIVIDUAL IS FOUND TO BE IMMERSED IN AND DEPENDENT ON THIS ALL ) KNOW THAT ) M NOTHING SPECIAL )N FACT ) M AGED AND FALLING APART AND ) M AP PROACHING THE END OF THIS LIFE ) FEEL LIKE SOME COMMON LEAF THAT HAS FALLEN TO THE GROUND AND IS DRYING UP

7ILSON 6AN $USEN S WISH WAS GRANTED IN !PRIL HE DIED QUIETLY AT HOME (E WROTE THE FOLLOWING WORDS IN HIS JOURNAL A FEW DAYS BEFORE HIS DEATH h3O HERE ) AM NEARLY AT THE END OF THE JOURNEY OF THIS LIFE ) SIT IN A BORROWED WHEELCHAIR FROM HOSPICE !T P M THERE IS A LIGHT SUN AND BREEZE IN THE GARDEN )T SEEMS LIKE GOOD FORTUNE TO SIT QUIETLY AND REm ECT h-Y DEATH WILL BE THE LAST MYSTERY ) FACE -Y ENERGY IS SO LOW NOW THAT ) HAVE TO PLAN EACH STEP IN ORDER TO DO SOME LITTLE THING ! LIGHT BREEZE SWIRLS ABOUT LEAVING THE AIR WELCOME AND REFRESHED 0ERHAPS THIS BREEZE IS A SOTTO VOCE WAY IN WHICH ALL THINGS GENTLY CONVERSE ) WOULD BE PLEASED IF EVERYTHING GENTLY CONVERSED ) EXPECT LITTLE OF ALL THINGS AND THEY EXPECT LITTLE OF ME BUT GENTLE COMMUNING WOULD BE MOST WELCOME ) WOULD PRE SUME THAT WE WOULD SPEAK OF LIFE ENGENDERING THINGSÂ&#x2C6;OF THE SMALL GENTLE BUSINESS OF LIFE h&OR A MINUTE ) EASILY SLID INTO AN IMAGE OF LYING DOWN AND FALLING ASLEEP "UT NOW ) HEAR SOME GATHERING OF FRIENDS NEARBY ! DOG SPEAKS UP NOW AND THEN )N A NEARBY BUSH A BLUEJAY HAS JUST MANAGED WITH UTTER QUIET TO VISIT AND LEAVE ITS NEST v s -R 6AN $USEN S MEMOIR IS AN EDITED TRANSCRIPT OF TWO INTERVIEWS CONDUCTED BY $AVID 2OUNDS AS PART OF HIS ANTHOLOGY ENTITLED $EEP 6ALLEY 0RAYERS 2E LIGION AND 3PIRITUALITY IN AN !MERICAN 4OWN IN PROGRESS -R 6AN $USEN S ACCOUNT OF HIS GRANDMOTHER S BEQUEST WAS ADAPTED FROM HIS BOOK $ESIGN OF %XISTENCE %MANATION FROM 3OURCE TO #REATION .EWTONVILLE -!

3WEDENBORG &OUNDATION

XIVnXV

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