HAVING TWINS BY ASHLEA BUTTERFIELD

Finding out I was expecting twins was a surreal (and scary) moment. I was 21 and working overseas with my partner and found out in a Greek hospital after a scare that my ‘two babies’ heartbeats were beating perfectly. I remember making the phone call home and telling my mum and dad to make sure they were sat down. After finding out I was pregnant, I still never thought I would be lucky enough to carry twins although it does run in my family as my mum is also a twin! Initially, I was absolutely over the moon. I was planning out nursery décor, writing down names and wondering what sex my babies would be. However, once I returned back to the UK the reality of actually having two babies set in… and of course it’s such an exciting and special time but I feel sometimes no one ever talks about the worry and upset you feel at the same time. I felt anxious about the future and how I would cope raising two babies, and the nerves started to kick in.

I was lucky enough to have had a wonderful experience with my local maternity unit. I was seen regularly as there were concerns about the growth of ‘Twin 2’ – who happened to be my little girl Isabella. I was always made to feel at ease and frequently discussed my birthing plan and any worries I may have had. It was decided with my consultant that the best option would be to be induced at 37 weeks if I made it this far… and I did. So, at 37 + 4 I was induced. My partner and my mum were my birthing partners and I think they both were pretty traumatised by the experience. I opted to have an epidural as I was admittedly scared about the prospect of labour. I was induced on a Tuesday and didn’t give birth until early hours Friday 10th April. I remember giving birth to Elliott pretty straightforward (well at least as straightforward as labour gets!?), the room was calm but after I gave birth to him, I remember him being whisked of my chest as Isabella had decided with all this new-found space, she would perform somersaults. So, my stubborn little girl was a breach delivery. I initially breast fed them both and at 6lb 9 and 5lb 12 we were allowed to leave hospital late Saturday evening. Both children were booked in for hip scans within the next few days.

The next few days were the hardest I have experienced. I am quite good at hiding how I feel, and I think I managed to disguise the panic I was feeling inside. I wish 26-year-old me could tell 22-year-old me that its ok to feel like you are struggling. I tried to follow every guideline I was given and when I look back it’s a complete blur. I struggled to breastfeed my little boy Elliott and felt so so guilty for a long time. However, saying all of this I have the best support system EVER. Myself, Elliott and Isabella live with my mum and dad and my family have helped me every step of the way. I am now a single parent and have been since Elliott and Isabella were 5 months old. The best advice that my mum used to give to me that I always pass on to anyone I know who is expecting is ‘a happy mum makes a happy baby’. I know what you’re thinking, how can I be the happiest mum in the world when I’m sleep deprived, drinking cold tea and have two over tired and hungry babies!? And its OK to think and feel this but nothing is permanent. Things progress and get easier and then they turn 4 and go to nursery and you miss the little sound of two babies crying for your attention and the late-night cosy feeds.

Everyone laughs when I tell them that the hardest thing about having twins for me was taking them to the park alone. It felt so daunting when they were 18 months old and wanted to do everything and anything!! I also really struggled to tandem breast feed and I think this is why I opted to bottle feed in the end. The best advice I can give to anyone who wants to breast feed twins is to not be afraid to ask for help if you need it, do what works for you and find what you are comfortable with. I have ALWAYS taken my mum everywhere with us. My mum is part of the team and I feel very lucky that all three of us have her in our lives. When people ask how I’ve ‘coped’ having two babies and being a single parent, I laugh and say my mum is my other half. Please don’t feel like you’re failing just because you need help from someone else, there is definitely a saying that says it takes a village to raise a child so if I (or anyone else) needs the help of my mum then that’s totally ok. Elliott and Isabella are 4 now, and our lives together are amazing. They truly are my best friends.

I really do think that having twins is so special, my two now love announcing to everyone they meet that they are twins. Like any siblings, they have their little squabbles but watching them and this bond they share is an indescribable feeling. I want to bottle the sound of their laughter bouncing off one another forever. The best advice I can give to anyone expecting twins is to not have too many expectations!! You don’t have to be at baby group for 9 am and you certainly don’t have to do it alone. As cliché as it sounds, having twins changed my life. But definitely for the better.

Near tragedy, led to a clever little girl saving her mum's life, and sparking the idea for a life saving project!

Isabelle (then 2 years old) called 999 whilst Jo was having a severe allergic reaction and nearly died. Jo had taught Isabelle her name and address by composing a rhyme. All children that age can learn nursery rhymes, why not this important information in case she ever found herself lost! She then inadvertently taught Isabelle how to make a 999 call - and when not to! A role play game of Drs & Nurses proved to be more beneficial than ever imagined. What Jo hadn't anticipated was that Isabelle would use these new skills sooner rather than later to save her mum's life. Jo was proud to see such amazing praise in the National news/papers but was determined to set the record straight. Isabelle was not a genius! Jo believes any child can replicate this, advocating all parents of young children should teach them this vital life saving skill. It was also crucial to share with parents that it need not just apply to those with a pre-existing medical condition. Any carer of young children could have an accident within the home or become incapacitated through illness. They would have only young children to assist them.

Jo (a former Police Officer) recognises the dangers children are faced with, and the difficulties that parents have teaching children various safety issues so she started a campaign via social media to share her story and encourage all parents of young children to teach them this vital life skill. One small voice was proving difficult to reach a nation of parents, subsequently months later Jo embarked on a mission to educate children through a story. She wrote her first story book teaching children how/when (when not to!) call 999 in a medical emergency. This book was published and endorsed by a large early years organisation, Bright Horizons. Jo even adapted the book for the US and Izzy presented it to a nursery in Florida! It has helped many children learn the concept of 999 and give them the confidence to know what to do in an emergency. Clearly she is very passionate about saving lives on and off duty and never stops thinking how she can help keep people safe.

She believes that we should never underestimate the capabilities of young children. As such she has co-written further safety books with Isabelle (now 12 who also thrives in the knowledge that she too can help save more lives! Jo and Izzy’s 2nd book, ‘Click Click, Buckle Up Quick’ is about car safety and aims to teach young children about the importance of seatbelt safety and sitting in a car seat. As a parent herself Jo only knows too well the challenges many parents face with children in seat belts!

Hard Rock Hotel London Review

Perfectly Located on the corner of Oxford Street and Park Lane in Central London https://www.hardrockhotels.com/london

If any of you have a teenager you will know how increasingly more difficult it is to provide a “cool” short break that will tempt your teenager away from snapchat and their ipad!. Well look no more. I visited The Hard Rock Hotel in London with my teenage daughter recently and “cool” it was. The Hard Rock hotel is an extension of the famous Hard Rock Cafes and like the restaurants were full of rock star memorabilia from the moment you walk through the doors.

My daughter’s jaw dropped when she realised the huge piano in the centre of the reception area was Freddie Mercury’s!. Other merchandise scattered about included Ed Sheeran’s shoes and Jimi Hendrix Guitar. We upgraded to The Hard Rock Hotels “Rock Royalty” which includes a separate VIP check in and access to their luxurious Rock Royalty lounge which provides guests with complimentary food and drinks from 7am until 10pm at night. These se lections includes afternoon tea or evening canapes and cocktails!. There is also an exclusive selection of merchandise in the lounge area.

Our bedroom was of a good size considering we were in central London. We had a super comfy bed, huge television and a mini lounge area as well as a very cool “dressing room” signposted as “wardrobe change”. No complaints at all. For an extra charge you can “hire” an electric guitar! Yes, really!.

We decided to try the in house restaurant at The Hard Rock for dinner and we were not disap pointed. My teenager was thrilled to see that there were live bands on all evening that you could enjoy whilst eating. The Hard Rock also offer a fantastic array of mocktails which is very important when you are aged 14!. The food was excellent and the service speedy and friendly. The location of the hotel is perfect. It is located on the corner of Oxford Street and Park Lane in Central London which is perfect for some sight seeing and a spot of shopping!. If you want to get some serious brownie points with your teenager, then The Hard Rock Hotel, London is the place for you!.