SCREEN/INTERNET YOU STREAM, I STREAM, WE ALL STREAM FOR USTREAM Charlie Sheen may not have been a harbinger of the apocalypse, but the fact that Two And A Half Men is considered the most popular sitcom ever and that Sheen’s journey into Crazyville received more media coverage than the death of Osama bin Laden does not bode well for our old friend TV. Getting all the parts together for a TV show—actors, writers, producers, directors—only accounts for a fraction of the work necessary to make television. Much of the rest of the work includes getting picked up by a network, ratings, contract negotiations, etc. The provocative, witty stuff may not be able to secure the financial backing that a homogenized, milquetoast offering does. Although some network television is great, there’s plenty of evidence that what is on network TV (ahem, Two And A Half Men) and what is not (Arrested Development) should be switched. So we should all run like lemmings to the edge of a cliff, stop before we jump over, put our smart little furry heads together and say, “Let’s stop watching stupid sitcoms and make our own stuff to watch.” Websites like Ustream are full of user-made content that is not only pleasing to our eyes and ears but feeds our intellectual and emotional needs as well. Yes, we still have to put up with things like “Chat Live with Dr. Phil,” but you can also catch an Adam Carolla interview or a live chat with NASA astronauts currently on a mission high above the Earth. And no matter what time you log on, you can watch the Shiba Inu Puppy Cam—five puppies sleeping in a big puppy bed—or a hummingbird nest that has had a camera trained on it since 2007. OK, not all of it is worth watching. Maybe there’s a Two And A Half Men rerun on right now. —Amy Atkins
40 | MAY 25–31, 2011 | BOISEweekly
SCREEN/TV
The skies are falling this summer.
SUMMERTIME’S TERRIBLE TV Summer’s almost here—time to hide from that cancerinducing star of flame by closing the curtains and watching TV. TNT’s Falling Skies begins Sunday, June 19. The apocalyptic, space-invaders series produced by Steven Spielberg features aliens called “skitters” that enslave children. It also features Moon Bloodgood—a gorgeous woman with the greatest name in the history of names, except perhaps former Los Angeles Lakers point guard Smush Parker. Wilfred premieres on FX on Thursday, June 23. It stars Elijah Wood as a suicidal guy who meets his neighbor’s dog. The dog looks normal to everyone else but appears as a man in a cheap dog suit to Frodo. Judging from the previews, Wilfred the dog is an asshole. Without question, we’ll be spared the worst show of the summer—perhaps the worst show ever, maybe even the worst anything ever—until Thursday, Aug. 8. On that day, we’ll be subjected to America’s Karaoke Challenge. ABC calls it “the amazing story of a competition that draws thousands of the most talented singers together in the ultimate sing-off—the Karaoke World Championships USA” and promises to “crown a new king and queen of karaoke.” If a royal karaoke wedding ensues, we should retroactively surrender to England. If you’re into sports, you may want to go outside and risk park-borne germs, because there’s not much going on after mid-June when the Dallas Mavericks don’t—or do—screw up again. You can always watch the WNBA, which is basketball for people whose favorite part of the game is when the ball looks like it’s going in but then clangs off the rim. Then there’s baseball. America’s purported national pastime is slightly less boring than folding towels, but it’s amusing because a lot of the players think it’s necessary to get drugged-up athletic in order to excel at a sport that can be played from start to finish while chain-smoking.
—Damon Hunzeker WWW. B O I S E WE E KLY. C O M