This Agony Aunt column is brought to you by the team at Health, Counselling and Wellbeing. If you have a question you would like answered email debate@aut.ac.nz and put Agony Aunt as the subject or drop it in to the Health, Counselling and Wellbeing office.
Dear Agony Aunt
I think I might be gay? I have had feelings for other men all my life. I’m really confused. From X
Hi X,
Most people at some point in their lives will question their sexuality. It is very common to have doubts or be confused or concerned about whether you might be gay, straight or bisexual (bisexual means attracted to both men and women). Sexuality as a concept is a lot more fluid than most people realise. You can think of it like a continuum: you can be mostly attracted to girls, but be into guys as well; you can be mostly into guys, whilst finding women attractive as well; or you can be attracted to both men and women equally. You don’t have to consider yourself “gay” or “straight” if you feel that those terms do not describe your sexual identity. It might be a good idea to talk to a trusted friend, family member or counsellor about how you’re feeling. Health, Counselling & Wellbeing have counsellors who you can talk to for free - either online or in-person - who self-identify as gay, lesbian and bisexual. They have been in your
situation before, and will be able to relate to your confusion and doubt, and talk about it with you. If you’re not yet ready to talk to someone about how you’re feeling, you might just need some time to yourself to sort things out in your head. You can ask yourself questions like: am I emotionally attracted to people of the same gender? Am I sexually attracted to the people of the same gender? Am I exclusively attracted to one gender? Do I always feel like this, or do my feelings change? If you want to meet some other gay, lesbian and bisexual people you can contact the LGBT support group OUT@AUT. They arrange social meetings at different locations at the end of each semester. Sometimes it can help just to have that social contact with other students who have had similar experiences as you. It’s really important that you talk to someone if you are feeling ‘low’ or depressed at any time, or if your thoughts are impacting on your daily life. You can contact Health, Counselling and Wellbeing on (09) 921 9992 for City campus or (09) 921 9998 for North Shore campus, or drop-in to make an appointment. Useful contacts Outataut@hotmail.com www.facebook.com/pages/Out-AUT/
by Katie Montgomerie
THIS IS IT! This semester is officially over and after you’ve completed those exams you are all so busy studying for say hello to a long awaited and much deserved break! The good thing about this break is that there are NO impending assignments to taint your enjoyment of the ski fields/overseas travel/ general laziness! So this week let us celebrate breaks, holidays, vacations, whatever you call them, and of course we can’t do this properly without UrbanDictionary.com. Let us start with the word that we are all waiting to scream at the top of our lungs when we finish our last exam...
Holiday a. British slang for the word ‘vacation’ b. A time of year in which you’re supposed to sit back and reflect and give thanks and shit like that but actually everyone just gets drunk and eats a lot and spends heaps of money because our society advocates wasting insane amounts of money in order to celebrate. Example: Well... I really don’t think this needs an example to be honest! But this would probably be a good time to point out that UrbanDictionary.com is largely contributed to by people from the USA, hence the whole “British slang” thing...
HOLIDAY!
Our next word (for all of those lucky people heading overseas this semester break) is...
A certain period during the year which is commemorating a religious event. From ‘Holy day’ ...Although I’m sure this is probably the correct definition I find it a little too boring for UrbanDictionary’s usually high entertainment standards hence...
26.
Vacathon
“My friend Megan is such a lucky cow! She’s going on a Vacathon in the UK during semester break, jealous!” And finally,
Vacation Amnesia
When you get back from a holiday or break and have absolutely no recollection of anything you studied prior to the break. Example “Ah crap I’m supposed to be tutoring someone who failed Media Comm last semester and they’re paying me $20 an hour but I have absolutely NO idea what I learnt. Talk about vacation amnesia!” Good luck for your exams and enjoy your break!
An extended vacation, of at least three weeks in duration that takes place at a location other than your home. Example
issue 13 2011