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“Eggceptional news coverage with hardboiled facts.”

The Egg Enquirer August 27-September 2, 1922

VOL. LXXI...No. 23,595


WEST EGG- AUG. 31 What first came through a drunken man’s slurred speech was his admiration of real books. Particularly those found on real bookshelves, stacked high with rows and rows of books. That very drunken man, known as Owl Eyes by his friends, took his love of books to the next level when he decided to open up West Egg’s own public library. Not only as a way for him to see shelves of worldliness everywhere, but to share those portals of knowledge with everyone. People from all places will soon be able to come down to the West Egg Public Library and check out many different kinds of books as well as magazines. From Town Tattle to Simon Called Peter, any of the latest reads will be found at the new public library, soon to be opened in September. The man decided to do this great feat for the people after he first saw a library that was at none other than Jay Gatsby’s house. However, to his sadness, the library was not of much use, rather it was just another room in the giant mansion. At this moment in time, Owl Eyes wanted to share his appreciation for literature and make wonderful works in history open for all to see. To fund the library, donations were gladly accepted by benefactors and private organizations looking to help the cause. As the grand opening occurs in September, many people eagerly await to see the new library, which took the place of an old, run-down bank. u

August 27- September 2, 1922

2 Cents

GATSBY FOUND DEAD IN POOL WEST EGG- AUG. 27 Great tragedy struck West Egg this week when local social butterfly Jay Gatsby was found dead, face down in his own pool. Murderer found only a few feet away at the crime scene, a bullet to his head. The murderer was identified as George Wilson, a mechanic. Although the link between the two men is still uncertain, one thing for sure was that Wilson had the plan boiling in his mind. A friend of the mechanic and coffee shop owner Michaelis had been comforting Wilson after his wife’s death when Michaelis said he would leave to go take a nap. When Michaelis returned four hours later, Wilson was nowhere to be seen. Unaware of what would happen next or what was on Wilson’s mind, Michaelis did not bother to try and find Wilson. Local bystanders and eyewitnesses report that they saw an estranged man walking briskly through town. He had a crazed look in his eye and most felt best to stay as

Above: Portrait of Jay Gatsby in front of his West Egg mansion taken three months prior to his untimely death.

far away from the man as possible. Nobody knew he would take his business to Jay Gatsby’s house. Further yet, no one knew he would conduct business with a gun. Wilson then entered upon Gatsby in his backyard pool, calmly floating in the water. With a draw of his hand, he shot Gatsby in the back of the head causing instant death. The man then took a few steps towards the back of the yard near some bushes and took his own life. The reasoning behind all of this is unknown. Gatsby’s own personal gardener, one of the few

servants still left at the mansion, came out of the dark with his own grief and guilt recently. The man wishes to remain anonymous, but truly expresses his grief and sorrow. The gardener reports that he was the last person to see Gatsby that fateful day of summer and probably could have done something to stop the course of events. Moments before the murder, he wished to drain the pool so that leaves would not fall in and clog the gutters, but was overrun by Gatsby’s incessant wish to use the pool one last time before summer ended.

Had he not stepped out of Gatsby’s way, the man would probably still be alive today. Despite the number of people who joined Gatsby at his parties, only about nine or ten people were present at his funeral. One of them was Henry C. Gatz, Gatsby’s father, who came from his home in Minnesota to attend the service. Gatsby, known for the lavish parties in his million-dollar mansion, was a man of high esteem who welcomed all to his home. His weekly festivities included music from a live band, dancing, and alcohol, free for any party-goers who wished for a good time. The whereabouts of the source for alcohol is unknown. Although the extravagant parties were the same every weekend, that did not stop the guests from partying until the wee hours of the morning nearly every time. Many guests still recall Gatsby’s warmness when meeting him in his home. Others will never forget dancing for hours and socializing with all the elite gathered there for a special night at Gatsby’s. u


August 27-September 2, 1922


Myrtle Wilson Ran Out of Her Home into Middle of Oncoming Traffic -------------------SHE WAS HIT BY A YELLOW CAR AND SUFFERED MASSIVE INJURIES, CAR DID NOT EVEN STOP TO SEE WHAT HAPPENED TO HER -------------------VALLEY OF ASHES- is not breaking news, Another source declares AUG. 26 what is breaking news is that Daisy herself had her At around seven what occurred after this lover and he was, in fact, o’clock to eight o’clock unfortunate accident. It Jay Gatsby. on August 26, a “death seems like a sequence What do these three car” hit Myrtle Wilson. of events recently are all things have in common? From the gathering tying together in a most Screams of foul play have darkness, a speeding car coincidental manner. been heard. There is a emerged and crashed Recently, East Egg conspiracy that says that into the poor defenseless dwellers Tom and Daisy Jay and Daisy were the woman. A woman of Buchanan suddenly ones in the large yellow her late thirties, Myrtle moved from their spacious car that hit Myrtle and Wilson was the wife of home that they have been that there may have been garage owner George extremely happy in. Their some ulterior motives for Wilson. It is rumored neighbors were baffled by this “accident.” that the married couple this sudden uprooting as Catherine claims were in a shouting match the Buchanan’s left tight- that her sister had been when Myrtle rushed into lipped. cheating on George the middle of the street On the other side, West and he shot Gatsby in frantically and was soon Egg, the death of Jay a jealous rage and then after hit by the car. Gatsby (see page one) has shot himself, thinking Most sinfully, the car also caused great shock as that Gatsby was Myrtle’s faltered momentarily then this man of mystery just other lover, when in fact rounded the bend while as mysteriously, as usual, he was Daisy’s. Catherine Myrtle Wilson lay in the was killed. is currently in the hospital road with blood pooling. But rumors have been for a suicide attempt the Michaelis, a witness at the flying, and anonymous night she screamed these scene of the crime, tore sources say the accident claims into the night. open her shirtwaist still ties in with all three. The death of Myrtle damp with perspiration A much inebriated, has hit her hard, and and found her left breast Catherine (last name Catherine feels betrayed swinging loose, obviously withheld), Myrtle and also wants to point exposing her beatless Wilson’s sister, was fingers at who caused the heart. seen wandering around death, regardless if it is Witnesses say the hit the streets announcing true or not. and run resulted when that her sister was dead These tidbits of a big yellow car tried to because of an affair she information have been pass the car in front while had with Tom Buchanan. passed down from a car in another direction This comes as many sources but police was quickly approaching. shocking news, as both cannot ask without Unfortunately, Wilson are from very different evidence. Please report all was in the way and met parts of the world and information known about her cruel fate. Tom was thought to be Myrtle Wilson’s tragic All this however, happily married to Daisy. death immediately. u

BUSINESS REBORN VALLEY OF ASHES Doctor T.J. Eckleburg is back in business as he has moved his practice from Queens, New York, to West Egg after a long hiatus. His absence was due to conducting research as he moved to California briefly to seek new optometry fashions. Known for his famous billboard in the Valley of Ashes, Doctor Eckleburg hopes that his new shop will once again attract customers. A new billboard will hopefully be put in place of the old one as to bring attention to his business once again. Doctor Eckleburg hopes that the new eyeglasses fashions as wells as his updated credentials will bring people to his offices. Now

located on Fifth Street just outside the Valley of Ashes, Doctor Eckleburg thinks more people will be seeing his advertisements as they drive along the road. Eyeglasses fashions include those popular amongst the younger generation on the west coast. Doctor Eckleburg has also invested in the fashions of Europe and brought them into America in the hopes of starting new trends among the youth. However, Doctor Eckleburg is still offering his old models at a lower price for the persnickety buyer. For a coupon to Doctor Eckleburg’s eyeglasses, see next Sunday’s paper and get yourself a pair. u

BROADWAY PRODUCTION IN PROGRESS WEST EGG- AUG. 28 A Broadway version of Jay Gatsby’s elaborate life has just been signed into production. The debut date has not yet been posted, but audiences have already voiced controversies over the true intentions of the show. The production will feature the humble beginnings of Gatsby and portray his early life as he accepted help from Dan Cody, a wealthy man who started Gatsby’s success. The show will go on to divulge into his recent life in West Egg, which will also include the weekly parties he held at his mansion as well as the rumors about his illegal activity in the alcohol making business. Protesters of the production believe it is exploiting the man’s life and not allowing his soul to

August 27-September 2, 1922

rest peacefully. Despite the writers’ efforts to show the man in the best light possible and the director’s constant assurances that they will not misinterpret his life, objectors still strongly disagree with the production. On the other side of the spectrum, supporters think the show will only put Gatsby’s controversial life in the lime light and supply reasoning to his actions. It will not show Gatsby in a bad way, but rather present him in a monumental fashion. While the protests continue, the production will also continue no matter what obstacles come into way. The director will make sure not to skew the utmost realities of Jay Gatsby’s amazing life. And as they say, the show must go on. u


FREELOADER TAKES TENNIS SHOES FROM ABANDONED HOUSE Man Caught Breaking Into Gatsby Mansion -----------------CHARGED WITH BURGLARY -----------------Mansion Has Been Defaced and Broken into Several Times Since Death of Jay Gatsby -----------------BURGLARY A THREAT TO NEIGHBORHOOD SAFTEY -----------------WEST EGG- SEPT. 2 Ewing Klipspringer, a previous resident of West Egg, was found breaking into the home of the late Jay Gatsby around three in the morning of September 2. When neighbor Nick Carraway heard knocking sounds and glass shattering, he immediately woke up and looked out his window. There he saw a figure climbing into the front sitting room of the next door mansion. Car-

raway then called for police. Police arrived moments later to see the man slowly inching out of the small hole he made in the window, a pair of his Ball Band tennis shoes firmly grasped in his hand. When confronted about his late night excursion, Klipspringer was absolutely bewildered. He claims he was at the scene just to take back a pair of shoes he left there when he still lived at the mansion. However, onlookers say Klipspringer looked uneasy and spastic like he had a hidden agenda while at the mansion. Klipspringer kept assuring the police that Gatsby would want him to take back his shoes, however Carraway thinks otherwise. “He didn’t even at-

tend Gatsby’s memorial service,” said Carraway. “It was just yesterday on September 1 and he didn’t even bother to come one day earlier.” Most know Klipspringer as the freeloader who lived at Gatsby’s house. He moved up to Greenwich just before Gatsby’s death. Crimes of defacing the abandoned mansion continue despite it being the scene of a crime. Even with police tape around the house, kids still get to the house through the backyard of the neighboring houses. Once there, they often just stand and stare at the backyard, waiting for something to happen. However, there have also been acts of rock throwing as well as breaking into the mansion. u

TEAPOT DOME SCANDAL PROGRESSES WYOMING Unlike the Boston Tea Party, this major scandal involves the teapot. The Teapot Dome Scandal, well known to all readers by now, is finally making headway. For those who have not kept up with its progress, the brief recap regards the Teapot Dome, an oil field on public land in Wyoming.

The oil reserves were set aside for the Navy by President Taft, but Albert B. Fall, the U.S. Secretary of the Interior, leased these lands to Henry Sinclair, an oil operator, and to Edward L. Doheny, an oil tycoon. The leasing was discovered and Thomas J. Walsh is conducting the investigation. On April 14, 1922, the Wall Street Journal

reported a secret arrangement where Fall leased the petroleum reserves to a private oil company without competitive bidding. Although Fall denied these charges, the leases to the oil companies seemed legal. However, the pressing question on how Fall got so much cash was investigated further and the findings were

very unexpected. The dealings that occurred were found in 1921 when Doheny lent Fall $100,000. Fall retires next year, so it will be interesting to see how exactly the trial will play out and what exactly Fall will be charged with as this is not a crime to be taken lightly. Fall was not charged with leasing without com-

petitive bidding as many have been believed, but rather that he accepted bribes. The trial will most likely address the bribes he took from Sinclair and Doheny and both of these men stand to go to jail as well. As the investigation is still continuing on, one can only hope that justice will soon be served to these corrupted people. u


August 27-September 2, 1922

WORLD SERIES TRIAL ADJOURNED WEST EGG Meyer Wolfsheim, a known New York crime kingpin, was caught for rigging the 1919 World Series. Eight members of the Chicago White Sox were consequently banned for life for giving the series to the Cincinatti Reds. An anonymous source says Wolfsheim “transformed organized crime from a thuggish activity by hoodlums into a big business, run like a corporation, with himself at the top.”

Wolfsheim allegedly paid members of the Chicago White Sox to throw the World Series, which allowed him to make a large amount of money betting against Chicago— known as the “Black Sox Scandal.” The Grand Jury trial was adjourned today and the results are slightly shocking. Wolfsheim was summoned to testify and pleaded not guilty saying that he was an innocent businessman who wanted to clear his name and reputation once and for

all. Prosecuters could find no evidence linking Wolfsheim and he was found not guilty. After the trial, Wolfsheim stated, “The whole started when some cheap gamblers decided to frame the Series and make a killing. The world knows I was asked in on the deal and my friends know how I turned it down flat. I don’t doubt that I was played and blamed for this incident. But I was not in on it, I would not have gone into it under any circumstances and did

no bet a cent on the Series after I found out what was underway.” The Grand Jury evidently believed him, but his testimony was too simple and black and white. In the gray area, many believe that Wolfsheim sneakily betted but covered up his tracks very well. As for the trial, Wolfsheim came out a winner, but a known swindler, his name and reputation still remain tarnished. Wolfsheim also seems to have ties with the

mystery of West Egg, Jay Gatsby. Anonymous sources state that Gatsby may have been involved with the rigging and may have come into his great wealth through his dealing in the World Series. It’s been three years since the 1919 World Series, but the situation continue to baffle many who believe in Wolfsheim’s guilt. With the recent death of Jay Gatsby, the interest in this case is sure to endure for a while. Updates will be available in next weeks’ issue. u


For reasons unknown, Tom and Daisy Buchanan have moved away. Rumor has it that Daisy was involved in Gatsby’s death. Nonetheless, their gorgeous estate on East Egg is now for sale. As the move was sudden, the Buchanan’s have opted to have their house auctioned off to the highest bidder as they want to get rid of the house as soon as possible. The starting price is $20,000 and bidding begins on Satuday, September 2, at the Buchanan estate. Please come join us as this house is one of a kind manor that is a work of art. This is a once-in-a-lifetime chance to get a mansion of this quality at such a low bidding price, so please do take advantage of this oppurtunity. u

George Wilson committed suicide after shooting Jay Gatsby and as his wife was hit by a car, his property is being evaluated for its value as he had no will. Most likely, his rundown workshop will be torn down as part of a large reconstruction project for the Valley of Ashes. Too long, has there been a negative connotation surrounding this area. It has become the wasteland known as the Valley of Ashes. But, this will all change soon enough. A blueprint has been submitted to the city to rebuild the Valley of Ashes into more mansions, as the newly rich are flooding in to get some property. The fate of Wilson’s house is either to be sold or torn down. There will be an update next week on whether his house will be sold or torn down, so if one is interested in a home that needs some reworking on, keep this property in mind, as the plans to tear it down may not pass. u

A site to behold, the tragic death of Gatsby certainly has cast a shadow over this household. However, time heals all wounds, and his very spacious estate will soon be up for sale. Infamous for his elaborate parties, the Gatsby manor may also become a museum-an ode to his life. Although not much is known, it has been said that Gatsby has no family and so there is no valid person to turn the house over to. Currently, cleaners are being hired to drain out the pool and clean it and around it as to remove all traces of blood. Whether the mansion becomes a historical site to pay respects to Gatsby, or as the proud home of a new person, this house is quite the catch. Stay tuned for more updates next week. u

FEMINISM AT FULL FORCE BALTIMORE Women of Japan and Belgium were given the right to be lawyers this year. As the yearning for women’s rights increases, more opportunities are being provided for women. Great strides towards a stronger female representation are now taking foot. Improvements were made by the Pan American Conference for Women, which took place in Baltimore, Maryland. The meeting featured prominent women including Mrs. Carrie Chapman Catt, the eminent President of the International Woman SuffrageAlliance, and Mrs. Mabel Walker Willebrandt, the Assistant Attorney General of the United States. Dona Bertha Lutz, Secretary of the Brazilian National Museum and Señorita Elena Torres, Secretary of the Centro Femenista were also present at the great meeting. Latin America was represented by 20 countries with delegates appointed by each country. The joining of the American and South American women to root for the overall female cause brought together the two parts of the continent. This is also the first time that the influential women of Latin America and Canada have joined the United States in considerable numbers as delegates to a Pan American meeting. There were both

August 27-September 2, 1922

official and unofficial delegates present. Unofficial delegates had the perspective of powerful organizations representing their countries. With their input, recommendations were made for the benefit of not only women and children but also of men. As the ultimate goals of the women were to reap better benefits for women and children, men’s issues were also in their minds. In order to reach those goals, however, women would have to gain more suffrage and rights in order to gain higher standing. Big topics that were discussed during the meetings included education, women in industry, white slavery, child welfare and the civil status of women and political status of women, The results of the Pan American Conference for Women has also influenced the next meeting which will be held in Santiago, Chile, in March 1923. The flurry of woman power has reached West Egg as multiple rallies have broken out in shopping centers and schools. Despite city efforts to contain them, the number of people, ranging from fifty to as many as about two hundred and fifty, is hard for the enforcement to control. With the help of the West Egg women, the humble beginnings of the feminist movement are on its way. u


GOLFER PURSUES STAR CAREER AMID DRAMA EAST EGG Jordan Baker, the controversial golf star tied to Nick Carraway, is no longer in the seemingly odd and distant relationship. But ending the relationship may have done good for Baker. She just won her third golf tournament with no rumors of cheating circulating. Few remember, but Jordan’s breakthrough win at her first tournament was followed by a frenzy of speculation that Baker cheated in order to win. Baker has few friends, but acquaintances say she is a notorious liar, saying she is often so bored that she makes up fictional stories to make life more interesting.

They say she is beautiful on the outside but on the inside, she seems careless but also over-practical. Her relationship with Carraway according to mutual contacts, seemed forced. However, each outing together made them look more and more estranged, despite the typical little acts of love. With the disintegration of their circle of friends— Tom and Daisy moving away, and Gatsby’s death—their own relationship also fell apart. It seems that this chapter of all of their lives has come to an end and they all want to cut off ties and start a new life without haunting memories of the past.

Baker in the near future will be participating in more golf tournaments. In a short interview after her third win, she said the break-up with Carraway seemed mutual but still accused him of “being un-gentlemanlike in their break-up phone call.” She also goes on to call him dishonest and a poor driver, an ironic comment as she is often said of having these characteristics. In her closing remark, she said that the breakup was for the better as she is now engaged with another man. However, Baker is known to bend the truth, so only time will tell if there is a marriage in her future. u


August 27-September 2, 1922

OBITUARIES: RECALLING THOSE WE WILL FOREVER HOLD DEAR IN OUR HEARTS JAY GATSBY On the sunny summer day of the 27th of August 1922, Jay Gatsby of West Egg, NY, passed into the great beyond. He is succeeded by his father, Henry C. Gatz. When he moved to West Egg, he did not know many people as he entered the new neighborhood. However, he built up his reputation and identity as a fun, classy, and extravagant socialite. People from all over New York ventured their way into Gatsby’s mansion for a sight to see. Hallways were filled with people and the dance floor was always covered with deliriously happy guests. Despite the parties getting too crazy

sometimes, guests always enjoyed themselves in Gatsby’s company. He was not quite the life of the party, but he sure added to the overall happy atmosphere of the 1920s. However, I knew the other side of Jay Gatsby. He always had his head up in the clouds, fantasizing about the rest of his life, but was still very determined with his dreams. He was a great man and an even more wonderful friend. I only knew him for a few months when I first moved to West Egg and yet I felt like I knew him for a lifetime. The first time I met him, I mistook him for another party guest instead of the wealthy gentleman he really was.

He truly was just like any other man with a kind heart as I was immediately greeted with an “old sport.” Gatsby was just like any other man but with a kind spirit and good intentions. Then sometimes Gatsby could be very unpredictable as he took every passion of his very seriously, however that only made our adventures even more interesting. One of our first adventures was a long drive to meet one of his friends, and that opened up another part of his life as a businessman. Even though everyone perceived Gatsby as a wealthy party fiend, I knew him as a real friend. -Nick Carraway

FOR SALE: 1921 Chevrolet ‘490’ A 1921 Chevrolet ‘490’ Touring Car Convertible is for sale by Tom Buchanan. It is an American four-door convertible with manual transmission. The car is in good condition with a new black paint job and brand new leather upholstery. The car was not driven often, however, it was worked on not too long ago to replace the brake. Previously, the brake was too loose causing the car to have difficulties to stop. Now the car holds a brand new brake and it has been re-oiled. u

MYRTLE WILSON Myrtle Wilson was pronounced dead at the scene of the accident at approximately 8:07 p.m. on August 26th. Known for her fierce vitality, Myrtle was the victim of a driver who lost control and although the driver who hit her continues to remain unknown, authorities are still relentlessly searching for possible suspects. Myrtle Wilson is succeeded by her sister Catherine, who recently tried to commit suicide from an overdose of sleeping pills. After her death, Myrtle’s husband went to Jay Gatsby’s house, murdered him, and then shot himself. Friends of Myrtle recall her as someone who tried to make the best of everything and had a full heart open to those she cared about. Our hearts go out to the Wilson family and friends. Please make the best of Myrtle’s accident and drive safely. Let her too-short life serve as a lesson to all. u

GEORGE WILSON George Wilson was a humble man with an honest business. On August 27th, Wilson took his own life under the sun in Jay Gatsby’s backyard. Although the reasons are still unclear, Wilson apparently was ill at the time and not clear in the head. Constantly flustered by something unknown to his friends, Wilson was in utter turmoil with himself. That was one aspect of Wilson, he kept things to himself. Although that meant small talk to be at a minimum, Wilson still conducted his business orderly and with morals. He was also known as a dreamer while he imagined a new life in New York with his wife. Despite the conflicts, however, Wilson kept to his job and did his best to support his family. His mechanic shop was also doing a mediocre job keeping up in the Valley of Ashes, but who can blame him as business was always dry in that area. Nonetheless, Wilson trekked on and kept his business as well as maintained living quarters for his wife. He loved his wife very much and was overcome with grief when his wife passed away. u

The Egg Enquirer  

Remake of a 1922 newsaper based on The Great Gatsby.

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