Hi- I wanted to send out a quick write up for our annual Thunder Roads Magazine of Iowa Crew round up! I’m Mark Mullins, President of the Motorcycle Awareness Group. Our group has a monthly column in TRMI called “MAG Corner”, where we share the latest in riding tips, motorcycle safety news and updates, and vent and have a laugh or two along the way. It’s an honor for us to be in TRMI, and as any regular reader of our column knows, our efforts are beginning to pay off. Statewide campaigns and petitions are underway to clear our motorist’s windshields to better see us riders, and with everyone’s continued effort this can become a reality, so please keep up the good work.
practiced a “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell” policy. Ours was a little different. They didn’t ask where I felt like riding, and I didn’t tell what happened on the ride. There was Dre, who built custom FXR’s in the back of his lady’s hair salon. Hair salons smell like hell anyhow, so nobody was the wiser. They always came out with a happy glow when he sprayed pearl on the tins he said -“Complimentary Glitter”, if you will. Then there was Tumbleweed, who got his name from the way his massive head of hair (think Bigfoot on a bad hair day) used to flop around on a ride. As scary as he looked, they guy could karaoke Rat Pack songs with the best of them. Until you’ve seen a six and a half foot tall tattooed Yeti nail “Candy Man” you ain’t lived. Then there was Motor-mouth Mike. I’d tell my other friends- “You’re going to meet my friend Like most of you, I’m sick of winter, even though there Mike. You won’t like him”. He didn’t look that tough have been worse winters in recent years. But any but I actually saw him break several of those punching weather that keeps me off the bike is not my favorite bag arcade games they had in bars back in the 90’s. kind, and I know we’re all ready for that first ride of Broken, as in lights out, tape over the coin slot, call the the season. There’s nothing like that first rush of wind repair guy broken. One time we saw a city boy in a pimp and noise each year when you fire the bike up for suit roughing up his girlfriend at a sports bar. Motorthe first time. It’s like a part of you that really matters mouth popped him so hard I saw his eyes roll up like a has been in hibernation, and now every stressful day slot machine. Rather than get tossed out, the bouncers has a release valve. It’s amazing what even a short bought us a round because that’s what they wanted to ride on the bike can do for your attitude, and how it do but couldn’t. Motor-mouth once launched a one-man clears the stress and cobwebs out of your mind. It’s vendetta against a girl who he was convinced stole his why I ride a bike that has no accessories other than wallet after an evening, um, “romp”. He had ten tons a speedo. I need that “detach”, I don’t want to hear of river rock dumped in her driveway. He signed her the radio, and I damn sure don’t want the internet or up for every magazine on earth. Had pizzas sent there a GPS talking back to me. Tom Tom can take a Hike hourly. Had her utilities read out and disconnected. Hike in other words. This was before the internet, so things like that we done My ride of choice is my over the phone. About a month home-built chop with an later, I was helping him move. Iowa Special Construction We picked up his bookcase, Title. I run an 80” Evo and his wallet fell off the top. through a 5 speed with a He offered a one word answer: chain final drive, which “Oops”. makes me kind of old-school these days, but I don’t care. My riders call it the “Loctite Back then my first real bike Special” because it’s forever was a kick-only shovel in a shedding parts along the wide glide frame. It got named way and keeping me busy “Puddles” for obvious reasons. finding suitable temporary Dre, Tumble, Motor-mouth and I solutions as we ride. I once rode around on black bikes that limped back from a group rattled and leaked and broke, ride using a lady’s hair tie but we had a ball doing it. to hold my front caliper Motor-mouth once went down on (thanks Kayla!). I firmly a sidewalk and through an believe that Blue Loctite outdoor art show in Scottsdale. holds it right up until you His sincere explanation was needed it most, yet parts that everybody looked bored. held with Red may as well He was thoughtful like that. This have been MIG welded was during the first modern together. Purple is only wave of Harley mania. The strong enough for the screw RUBS ride of choice at the time in the flag on the mail box, was a Heritage, a Nostalgia, and nobody can definitively or a Springer softail, of course tell me what Green is for shades like Robin’s Egg Blue or (Loctite’s own web site says Salmon. We’d thunder up on our “for carburetors and electrical”, now there’s an odd dusty crap and park in the center of those Easter Eggs combo). Until they make a Blue and a Half, you’re and just enjoy the commotion. Some would come out likely to find me with an Allen key set in my pocket and offer to move their bikes. I saw one Nube actually every time I mount up, and maybe a hair tie or two. come out and put a cover on his Hallmark Egg. It was hilarious. I hope you’re there the next time, wherever You never meet a boring person on a motorcycle; I’ve there is, and we’ll share a laugh and go for a ride. But not come to accept that. Some you like some you don’t. on the sidewalk. That was so 90’s. I used to ride with some truly interesting characters out west. Not a lot of last names were used, and they Mark Mullins, President, MAG Thunder Roads Magazine of Iowa on Facebook www.thunderroadsiowa.com 6 - TRMI MARCH 2015
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