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wineryweddings WHAT’S YOUR







wineryweddings features

Are you a classic, modern, vintage or rustic bride?

It's in the Details

Check out this winery-themed photo shoot chockfull of wedding ideas.

Destination Weddings

Hit the road (or sky) with planning tips and advice for your dream destination wedding.

3 Letter from the Editor

4 The Venue

An East Coast Experience

6 Planning Advice


Guest List Do’s and Don’ts Kids Welcome

20 Health and Fitness Working it Out

Photo courtesy of Honeymoon Islands

every issue


Rothwell Photograpy



What’s your Style?

e Photograpy



Bonnie Sen Creativ




22 On a Budget Adding it Up

25 DIY

Wine Bottle Décor

27 Featured Weddings

Ashley & Kyle

Julie & Kenny

Amy & Greg

Laura & Scott

Ashley & Amir

Katie & Joe

Sarah & Matt

46 Wining and Dining Classic Wine Pairings

48 Newlywed Advice Overcoming In-Law Disappointment


Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

featured weddings


Amy & Dave

wineryweddings Publisher & Editor May Durkovic Editor & Contributing Writer Lindsey Frederick Operations Director Derek Durkovic Art Direction & Graphic Design Wendy Wade, Weswen Design Social Media Manager and Contributing Writer Nicole Fitch Cover Photograph Magnolia Street Photography Bride and Groom: Laura and Scott Ackerman Winery Weddings Magazine is published semiannually. For advertising opportunities and editorial inquiries, email editor@winerylove.com. All content copyright © Winery Weddings Magazine 2014. No part of this publication may be reproduced in any form without the expressed written permission from the publisher. We wish to thank the wedding professionals who contributed to this issue: Tyler FitzHugh Jenise Rolle Grace Lee Abby Ayer Diane Kolanovi-Solaja Sharon Naylor



magine the sunlight streaming over your face as you sip Riesling and gaze into the horizon, where rows of mature vines stretch toward the foot of a nearby mountain. Ah, a day at the vineyard. As East Coast wineries gain popularity, so do winery weddings. From the Finger Lakes of New York to North Carolina’s Blue Ridge Mountains, there’s an ideal winery venue for any bride and groom. The idea of Winery Weddings Magazine unfolded when my husband and I realized there were few resources for couples interested in a winery wedding. Three months after we exchanged vows at Philip Carter Winery, the pages of Winery Weddings Magazine lit up with text and beautiful imagery. Initially, the magazine targeted brides and grooms considering a winery wedding at one of the 80 plus vineyards throughout Virginia. After four publications, we are now expanding to incorporate all East Coast winery venues from New York to North Carolina. Each of the 325 venues listed in our online winery wedding guide offer a fun, unique setting for your special day. This issue guides you through guest list do's and dont's, wedding styles, dresses that impress and destination wedding planning. So pour yourself a glass of wine and delve into the beautiful world of winery weddings. Enjoy!

š g n i h t e t i r o my fav issue


Find us on:


in this

A wedding style photo gallery!

Photo Courtesy of Pamela Lepold Photography


the venue An East Coast Experience


Barboursville Vineyards, Sharp Rock Vineyards and Ingleside Vineyards include guest rooms on site. Or you might be interested in a mini-getaway closer to home. A vineyard venue offers many options. You can plan a winery reception and select a separate ceremony site, or keep it simple with a vineyard ceremony and reception. Marry among the vines or inside the tasting room. Some wineries offer a separate facility with a bridal suite, small kitchen and bathroom specifically for private events. Each winery venue offers its own personalized and unique style. The wines are exceptional and the relaxed, family-friendly atmosphere is a welcome break from the stresses of everyday life.

New York


ew York is home to the oldest winery in America, Brotherhood Winery. Brotherhood’s history dates back to 1810 when owner Jean Jacques first planted grapes. The Finger Lakes region ranked among the top 10 wine destinations around the world in 2013. Popular New York wines include Reisling, Seyvall Blanc, Chardonnay, Pinot Noir and Cabernet Sauvignon. The state boasts of 379 wineries.

New Jersey


ew Jersey’s humid, maritime climate with warmer winters and cooler

Vita Images

he East Coast is home to over 320 fun, unique winery venues from New York to North Carolina. So why not have your dream wedding or reception at a vineyard? If you’re a beach bum, check out Sanctuary Vineyards in North Carolina, just 20 minutes from Kitty Hawk beach. Marry on the beach, then party at the vineyard. If a lake wedding is for you, visit New York’s gorgeous Finger Lakes wineries. For a magical mountain wedding consider a winery in Virginia’s Shenandoah Valley or North Carolina’s Blue Ridge Mountains. If you’re a city gal, check out City Winery and Brooklyn Winery in the heart of New York City. A vineyard with an inn or bed and breakfast is the perfect place for a destination wedding. Virginia’s


Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

Photography by Neil van Niekerk

summers is ideal for grape growing. Most popular wines include Pinot Noir, Cabernet Sauvignon, Cabernet Franc, Chambourcin, Chardonnay and Vidal Blanc. Many of the 46 wineries can be found in the Outer Coastal Plain, or southern Jersey.


t 2,350 feet Pennsylvania above sea level, Pennsylvania’s Christian W. Klay Winery is the highest vineyard east of the Rockies. Elevated mountain vineyards thrive in the state’s moderate, maritime-influenced climate. Popular wines include Catawaba, Cayuga, Chambourcin, Gewurztraminer, Pinot Gris and Vignoles. Over the past 30 years Pennsylvania wineries have increased from 27 to 123.



etween the Appalachian foothills and Chesapeake Bay lie

Pamela Lepold Photography


the majority of Maryland’s wineries. The cool, hillside climate of Maryland’s Capital and Eastern regions foster a variety of grapes. Popular wines include Norton, Albarino, Barbera, Catawba, Nebbiolo and Chambourcin. The state is home to 60 wineries.

irginia wine Virginia made a name for itself within the international wine industry in 2012. Varying weather patterns and temperate climates are optimal for grape growth. Popular wines include Chardonnay, Cabernet Franc, Riesling, Viognier, Merlot, Norton and Vidal Blanc. Virginia currently boasts of 248 wineries as the industry continues to grow.


orth Carolina vineyards produce European-style Vinifera grapes and thick-skinned Muscadine grapes. North Vineyards grow Carolina in a variety of climates throughout the mountains, piedmont and coastline regions. Popular wines include Cabernet Sauvignon, Cabernet Franc, Merlot, Syrah, Chardonnay and Viognier. North Carolina wineries have more than quadrupled since 2001, now totaling 120. ww



planning advice


Guest List Do's and Dont's

Pamela Lepold Photography

ith up to 200 guests on the invite list, your wedding may be the largest party you’ll ever host. And for good reason; it’s not every day you say “I do.” It’s exciting to share your special day with family and friends, but deciding who’s in and who’s out isn’t always easy. According to Emily Post’s Wedding Etiquette, factors to consider when planning your guest list include the size of your ceremony and reception sites, desired level of intimacy and your wedding budget. If you fall in love with a venue that only holds 30 guests, you won’t have the option of a big wedding. A short guest list fosters a more intimate wedding and the opportunity to spend quality time with each guest. Longer guest lists include more friends and family, but limits time with each guest. And the longer the guest list, the higher the head count… and the bill. When planning your guest list, first establish the number of guests you don’t wish to exceed. Then, decide on the number of guests parents can invite. If parents want to invite more guests, consider suggesting a party shortly after the wedding where parents’ friends can celebrate


By Tyler FitzHugh

your new marriage. If the guest list runs too long, create a hierarchy system to prioritize guests. For instance, immediate family and bridal attendants rank highest. Prioritize close friends and extended family members next, followed by acquaintances and co-workers. As a general rule, it’s proper to invite spouses, fiancés and serious significant others.

Follow the “all or nothing” rule when inviting co-workers. If you invite one co-worker you should invite all, or opt not to invite any. A co-worker is not likely to be offended if she doesn’t receive your fancy wedding invitation, unless others are invited and she didn’t make the cut. The one exception applies to inviting your boss. Remember, you do not have to invite

On average, 10-20% of guests won’t be able to attend the wedding. Single friends and family members can receive an invite for one. On average, 10-20% of guests won’t be able to attend the wedding, which frees space for additional invites. Keep this in mind when trimming down the guest list, and create a backup list with the names of friends and family you decided to cut. Request an early RSVP date so there’s time to invite backup guests. Another decision when creating your guest list is the inclusion of children. Each child is counted as a guest, increasing overall cost. If you choose not to invite children, do not include their names on the invitations’ outer and inner envelopes. Simply address the invitation to “Mr.” and “Mrs.” It’s not appropriate to note “children are not allowed” on the invitation. Instead, include this information on your wedding website and pass it on by word of mouth.

Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

everyone you and your parents know to your wedding. You’re also not obligated to invite someone just because you were invited to his or her wedding. However, if you’d like to post pictures of your engagement ring on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram, call friends who didn’t make the guest list before hitting the post button. Let them know it was a hard decision, but they won’t receive an invite. Suggest celebrating with them after the wedding. Creating your guest list will take time, consideration and patience. Set boundaries early and remember you probably won’t make everyone happy no matter how hard you try. Let go of guilt and take advantage of the opportunity to invite those you really want to spend time with on your special day. ww As a boutique event planning firm, Voilà! Event Studio collaborates with you to tailor your unique wedding to perfection. Whether advocating for you during the planning process or styling luxury designs on the day of the wedding, we are obsessed with every petite detail. Visit Voilà! Event Studio at www.voilaeventstudio.com


Kids Welcome

any couples face a common reservation when creating their guest list: inviting kids. Visions of wedding day chaos may seem a little overwhelming, but children can bring precious moments to your special day. If you choose to invite children, include kid-friendly activities to keep them entertained. Here are a few ideas:


Children want to feel special and they love gifts. Place a wrapped gift in each child’s seat so they have something to play with during the reception. Keep boys entertained with inexpensive toy cars and girls content with a new tiara or magic wand.

Inspired Photography by Susie and Becky

By Jenise Rolle

castles, boats or even hot air balloons will keep any child’s fingers busy. Set up a jewelry station where girls can make beaded necklaces and bracelets.


Sometimes, no matter how many activities are planned, the wiggles or an uncontrollable desire to run around can still overpower a child. Create a simple iSpy game, asking kids to check off items from a list, such as two people holding hands, something red, a high heeled shoe or a bouquet of flowers.

Snap Away

Show children they are important and appreciated by inviting them to help at the reception. Place disposable cameras on the table for children to snap away at the reception. You might get a few great candid shots!


An ice cream sundae or cupcake creation table is perfect for the kids’ dessert. Each child can decorate his or her own treat, whether it’s vanilla ice cream with chocolate fudge and sprinkles or a chocolate cupcake with strawberry icing. When deciding if you’d like to invite children to your wedding, don’t worry about spilled drinks or teary eyes. Just make sure the photographer captures that “Uh-Oh” face. If given the right activities and games, kids will remember your amazing wedding for years to come. ww


Hands-on activities also keep children occupied at weddings. Pass out activity packets with crayons, a small coloring book, bubbles, stickers and a small piece of candy. Paper cutouts taped together to create colorful

Saskia Paulussen Photography

To the “T” Events and Catering is the premier lifestyle event coordination and catering company based in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. With more than seven years of experience, our areas of expertise include weddings and corporate events, as well as upscale social events and elegant private events. Visit To the "T" Events at www.tothetevents.biz. www.wineryweddingmagazine.com


s What'Your W


hen it comes to wedding planning, the opportunities are endless. As a newly engaged bride, this is your time to let the creativity flow and showcase your true personality. Begin by selecting a style to guide you through the wedding planning process, from invitation choices to cake designs. Read up on the four primary wedding categories-classic, vintage, modern and rustic-and then jump right into the planning.

Rothwell Photogra

Jessica Morrisy Photography

Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

graphy oto Josef Sullivan Ph


E. Leise Photography

Jessica Morisey Photography

A classic style stands the test of time. Think Jackie Onassis Kennedy or Kate Middleton. Classic wedding décor includes timeless pieces that radiate no matter what fashion is trending at the time. With a style that’s simple and clean yet still turns heads, the classic bride chooses a more conservative look with her dress and décor. Not to say that traditional isn’t sexy; many classic dresses are strapless and form fitting.



By Nicole Fitch

Dominique Attaway Photography

Inspired Photography by Susie and Becky


Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

BG Productions

Rothwell Ph


Jessica Morisey Photography

Astrid Photography

Vintage style incorporates older décor and attire from past decades to past centuries. Add a touch of vintage to your wedding by touting a piece handed down from a family member or items from a specific era. Vintage style weddings have become more popular over the past five years. Brides love showcasing their findings from flea markets, thrift shops and their grandmothers’ closets.

Sara Wight Photo



s What'Your


Astrid Photography

Heather Bee Photography



Custom by Nicole Pho

Tammy Keefer Ph


Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

Jessica Morrisy Photography

E. Leise Photography

Modern style represents all things new, hip and chic. Think peplum dresses and chevron tablecloths. But that’s not where modern style ends. The modern woman keeps up with the latest trends and is always open to new and better ideas. Contemporary dÊcor of sleek, straight lines with Scandinavian style ties the modern wedding together.




s What'Your


Pamela Lepold Photography

Rothwell Photograpy





Custom by Nico le Photography

s What'Your


Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

Dani Leigh Photography

Pamela Lepold Photography

Sara Wight Photography

A rustic wedding is warm and inviting with a cozy fireplace, picnic-style tables, and hand-picked flowers. Laid back but still classy, rustic weddings illustrate country living at its best. Rustic dĂŠcor is ideal for an outdoor venue, specifically an old barn, farm house or rustic-style tasting room. Painted wine bottles, birch candle holders and hay stacks or barrels are great dĂŠcor options for the rustic bride and groom.

Jessica Morrisy Photography Pamela Lepold Photography



It's in the Details

By Bridal Bellhop


Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

Inspired by the stark moodiness and quiet elegance of a Rembrandt painting, wedding resource maven Bridal Bellhop gathered a group of top-notch D.C. area vendors for a styled photo shoot at The Winery at Bull Run. The centerpiece of a winery wedding, fine wine served as the muse for design elements throughout the shoot. Figs and pomegranates mixed with pops of gold created an air of luxe and sophistication. Such refinements inspire brides to envision a winery wedding beyond burlap and lace. The cocktail hour display portrayed rich flavor, color and edible details. Pomegranate bruschetta, heart shaped figs and red wine caramelized goat cheese tartlets scattered across wine barrels. The edible delights and décor were effortlessly tied together with a fruit basket-inspired floral arrangement. Gold-foiled wedding invitations in the drawer of a beautifully worn hutch accentuated the ornate, quatrefoil pattern and merlot color scheme. The farmhouse sweetheart table was styled with a luscious garland intertwined with deconstructed pomegranates and vibrant merlot blossoms. A collection of antiquegold picture frames and a crystal candelabra transformed into an exquisite floral vessel added a touch of drama to the table setting. The pomegranate champagne sparkler and gold china completed the luxe, romantic vibe. A trio of gold macaroons, pomegranate panna cotta and mini-cup-

cakes adorned a pink Victorian love seat in the heart of the vineyard. A chocolate cake dripping in ganache, decorated with lush berries, contributed to the theme. The bride’s romantic Rembrandt look was achieved through a combination of dark berry lips and gold eye makeup, softened with loosely pinned curls. The high-lace neckline of her wedding gown added a touch of romance to the look, while matte black nails, a cascading bouquet and gold accessories created a sultry twist. Bridal Bellhop, expert wedding vendor curator, used their unique matching system to bring the vision to life. Each wedding vendor was carefully selected to ensure the products and services captured in this styled shoot reflect Bridal Bellhop’s standard of excellence. ww Written and contributed by Grace Lee of Bridal Bellhop, the maven of wedding resource services. Visit Bridal Bellhop at www.bridalbellhop.com


that brought the vision to life: Photography - Bonnie Sen Creative Photography Venue - The Winery at Bull Run Wedding Planner - Pure Whimsy Events Wedding Dress - Ellie’s Bridal Makeup/Hair - Carolyn Thombs Makeup Artistry & Consulting Flowers - EightTreeStreet Catering - Amphora Catering Rentals - Vintage Affairs Stella & Dot - Tyler Fitzhugh Cake + Desserts - Fresh Bakes Invitations - Ribbon & Ink Vendor Matching - Bridal Bellhop



Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

It's in the Details



health and fitness Working it Out


rom the first look to the first dance, your wedding day will be packed with significant, life changing moments. So look and feel your best by scheduling regular fitness sessions before the festivities. A weekly fitness routine reduces stress and increases endorphins, improving your mood and boosting your confidence. Try these moves in repetitions of 10, keeping in mind how stunning you’ll look in your bridal gown.


Targeted muscles: biceps Equipment: two barbells 1. Stand with your back straight and your feet shoulder width apart. Hold a barbell in each hand with your palms facing up. 2. Slowly lift your right hand to your right shoulder while counting to five. 3. Slowly drop your right hand to your right outer thigh while counting to five. 4. Repeat steps two and three on your left. Alternate exercise: Instead of alternating right and left, simultaneously bring both barbells up and down.

Tricep Dips

Targeted muscles: triceps, chest, shoulders Equipment: chair 1. Sit on the edge of a sturdy chair with your back straight. 2. Wrap your fingers around the edge of the seat, keeping your arms


straight and your knees bent at a 90 degree angle. 3. Slide your bottom forward, off the seat so your arms are supporting your body. 4. Bend your elbows while slowly lowering your bottom toward the floor (your upper body should just clear the seat). 5. Push back up until you reach your starting position. Use your arms, not your feet, to push up. 6. Repeat steps four to five.

Bend your elbows at a 90 degree angle. 3. Push the barbells up and over your head until they lightly touch. Hold this position for five seconds. 4. Slowly lower your arms until your elbows are bent at a 90 degree angle, biceps parallel with the floor. 5. Repeat steps two through five.

Shoulder Press

Targeted muscles: quadriceps, hamstrings, calves Equipment: none

Targeted muscles: shoulders, biceps, upper back Equipment: chair with back support, two barbells 1. Sit with your back against the chair and your feet shoulder width apart. Hold a barbell in each hand. 2. Straighten your arms down to your sides; then raise them to shoulder height, elbows straight, palms facing up.

Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

LEGS Squats

1. Stand in the middle of the room with your feet shoulder width apart and knees slightly bent. 2. Stretch your arms straight out in front of you, parallel to the floor. 3. Push your bottom out and down like you’re sitting in a chair. Let your lower back arch slightly as you descend.

4. Lower your bottom until your thighs are parallel to the floor, or as close as possible. Keep your knees directly over your ankles and press your weight back on your heels. 5. Push through your heels and bring your body up to a standing position. 6. Repeat steps three to five. Alternate exercise: Stand with your back against a wall, feet planted a foot in front of the wall. Follow steps 4-5 above (beginner level). Alternate exercise: Squat jumps are executed like a squat with the addition of a jump after standing (expert level).

Front Lunges

Targeted muscles: hamstrings, glutes, quadriceps Equipment: none 1. Stand with hands on your hips and your feet together pointed straight ahead. 2. Pick up your right foot and lunge forward landing on your heel first, then rolling onto the ball of your foot. Your right thigh should be bent at a 90 degree angle with your left knee almost touching the floor. 3. Push off the floor with your right foot while straightening your right knee. 4. Bring your left foot next to your right foot ending in a standing position. 5. Repeat steps two through four on the left. Note: Front lunges can be stationary by bringing the front foot to the back foot. Alternate exercise: Hold weights while performing lunges.

Leg Kickbacks

Targeted muscles: glutes, hamstrings, quadriceps Equipment: none 1. Position yourself on your hands

and knees, your back parallel with the floor. 2. Raise your right knee and extend your right leg backwards until it is straight, parallel with the floor. 3. Return to the starting position with both knees on the floor. 4. Repeat steps two through three on the left.

ABS Crunches

Targeted muscles: abdominals Equipment: none 1. Lie down on your back with knees bent and arms crossed in front of your chest. 2. Slowly lift your head, neck and shoulder blades toward the ceiling, using your abdominal muscles, inhaling as you ascend. 3. Once your shoulder blades are no longer touching the floor, ease your head, neck and shoulders toward the floor, exhaling as you descend. 4. Repeat steps two to three. Alternate exercise: Lift your right shoulder blade diagonally across your body, then lower to the floor. Repeat on the left and alternate right and left sides to target oblique muscles.

Side Punch

Targeted muscles: abdominals Equipment: none 1. Stand with feet shoulder width apart, toes turned away from your body. 2. Slightly bend knees,

bring your hands just under your chin and tuck your elbows in. 3. Rotate your hips to the left while twisting your upper body in the same direction; keep your head and neck aligned with your spine. 4. At the same time, punch in front of you with your right arm. 5. End with your right heel off the ground, hips, torso and head facing the left; arm punched in front of you. 6. Rotate your hips, upper body and right arm to the starting position. 7. Repeat steps three through six on the left.

Kettlebell Windmill

Targeted muscles: abdominals, hamstrings, glutes, lower back, shoulders, triceps Equipment: one kettlebell 1. Stand with your feet shoulder width apart and a kettlebell in your right hand. 2. Raise your right arm straight overhead, aligning your right foot, hip and kettlebell. Keep your left arm down at your side. 3. Slowly bend your waist to the left until your left hand touches your left foot. Your right arm should be fully extended, parallel with the floor and your knees should be straight. 4. Slowly push up to the starting position with your right arm straight overhead and left arm by your side. 5. Repeat steps two to four 10 times. 6. Repeat steps one through five on the left 10 times. ww



on a budget Adding it Up


f you’ve ever watched Father of the Bride you’re familiar with how painfully expensive weddings can be. Any father of the bride would look twice at a $25,656 price tag, the cost of an average wedding in the United States. It might feel a little overwhelming to think about a wedding budget, but it’s important to crunch numbers before your first shopping spree.

Determine Your Budget

In the past, a bride’s parents were expected to pay for the wedding, and the groom’s parents were responsible for the rehearsal dinner. Today, couples marry at an older age, placing them in a better position to pay for their own weddings. This decreases the expectation that family members cover all or even some expenses. Many parents chip in a certain amount of money,

and it’s important to discuss finances with them before creating your budget. The goal is to determine how much you, your fiancé and family members will contribute to your big day.

Set Priorities

What’s most important to you and your fiancé? The dress, the venue, the rings or the food? Once you set priorities you’re ready to create a budget spreadsheet.

Create a Budget Spreadsheet

In the first column of a blank spreadsheet, list all wedding categories. Factor in the bigger expenses like the venue, photographer and caterer as well as the smaller expenses, such as toasting glasses, cake toppers and ring pillows. In the next column, include the estimated cost of each category (visit

costofwedding.com for cost estimates in your area). Add tax and gratuity as needed. If you are financially responsible for the rehearsal dinner and honeymoon don’t forget to budget those, too.

Add a Buffer

Most couples spend 10-12% more on their wedding than they originally budgeted. Avoid overspending by increasing your total budget at least 10% to cover unexpected and hidden costs.

Track Expenses

Track all wedding expenses in the third column of your budget spreadsheet. If you overspend in one category, cut back in another or secure additional funds. Keep all signed contracts and receipts in a safe place, and make sure you get what you pay for. ww


Let Weddings by the Vine assist in creating a truly tasteful event!

w w w. w e d d i n g s b y t h e v i n e . c o m 919.415.1331 | kimberly@weddingsbythevine.com

planning advice

By Abby Ayeh

Favors to Savor


ay “thank you” to your guests with a personalized memento of your special day. Wedding favors provide an opportunity to share something you love with your guests. There are many favor options, from edible and themed favors to charity donations.

Edible Favors

Edible favors such as mini-cakes, pastries and personalized cookies or candy are always popular. Try a candy buffet and lay candy bags on the buffet table with a personalized thank you message. The setup, styling and color scheme of your favors should tie directly into your wedding theme.

Themed Favors

You can always weave favors into the theme or location of your wed-


Designed by Pretty Posh Events

ding. Mini-wine bottles or personalized wine glasses are excellent winery wedding favors. Place a wine glass at each table setting so guests can use their favors right away.

Charity Donations

Charity donations are thoughtful favors that carry great sentiment, providing a unique opportunity to celebrate your big day and support a meaningful cause. Write a card to each guest, letting them know a donation was made in their honor to a specific charity. Include charity details and a special thank you for their presence at your wedding.

Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

When choosing a favor, consider the packaging. Enhance the beauty of your table setting by using creative boxes, bags and embellishments. This contributes to the décor while providing memorable keepsakes for your guests. ww Pretty Posh Events is a full service event planning and design company based out of North Brunswick, New Jersey, serving the tri state area. They specialize in chic, custom and exquisite design detail from invitation and floral design, to custom dessert tables and décor. Visit prettyposhevents.com


By Lindsey Frederick

Wine Bottle Décor


ecorating for your wedding doesn’t have to cost a fortune—just a little planning, time, and a whole lot of wine! Here are five projects to turn empty wine bottles from old glass into wedding class.

Rubber band Painted Wine Bottle Difficulty: low

Orchid Wine Bottle Corks

Steps: 4

Difficulty: low

Materials • Wine bottles • Spray paint • Rubber bands of varying width Steps 1. Wash bottle; remove label. 2. Place rubber bands around bottle to create desired pattern. 3. Spray paint bottle and let dry. 4. Remove rubber bands. Suggestion: Fill painted bottle with flowers, greenery, or tall grass.

Steps: 3

Materials • Corks • Orchids (real or silk) • Pocketknife or small screwdriver • Scissors or wire cutters

Burlap and TwineWrapped Wine Bottle Difficulty: low

Steps: 4

Materials • Wine bottles • Spray paint • Burlap or twine • Hot glue gun • Hot glue sticks • Decorative flowers, faux-antique buttons or lace

Steps 1. Trim orchid stems to approximately 1/2-1 inch. Use scissors for real flowers; wire cutters for silk flowers. 2. Using the knife or screwdriver, dig a hole in the cork long enough and deep enough to insert the flower stem. 3. Insert flower stem.

Steps 1. Wash bottle; remove label. 2. Spray paint bottle; let dry. 3. Cut burlap into 4” x 10” piece; glue around the center of the bottle. Or wrap twine around the center of the bottle approximately 4” high. 4. Glue flowers, faux-antique buttons and/or lace on burlap/twine, as desired.



Cork Wine Bottle Hanging Difficulty: medium

Steps: 8

Materials • Wine corks (about 17 each) • Hot glue gun • Hot glue sticks • Knife • Plastic grapes • Silk leaves • Ribbon Steps 1. Align and glue corks into 3 rows of 4. 2. Glue the 3 rows of 4 together endto-end to create the “bottle.” 3. Glue 2 corks together; center and attach to the bottle’s top row to create the “neck of the bottle.” 4. Center and glue a cork vertically above the neck to lengthen it. 5. Center and glue one cork horizontally to the bottom row to create the “base.” 6. Cut one cork into four angled pieces; glue pointed-side-in to the empty corners of the neck and base. 7. Taper one end of a cork using a knife; glue tapered-end-down to the neck to create the “bottle cork.” 8. Decorate the bottle with plastic grapes, silk leaves and ribbon, as desired.

Hanging Wine Bottle Lantern Difficulty: high Steps: 16 Materials • Wine bottle • Cotton string or yarn • Nail polish remover • Candle lighter • Large metal pot (large enough to submerge a wine bottle) • Cold water • Ice cubes • Copper wire (18 gauge) • Brass or metal ring • Wire cutters • Needle nose pliers • Tea lights Steps 1. Wash bottle; remove labels. 2. Wrap cotton yarn/string tightly and evenly around the bottle at least 2” below the curved neck. Wrap 3 to 4 times and tie off. 3. Remove cotton string and saturate in nail polish remover. 4. Replace cotton string on wine bottle. 5. Fill a large pot with cold water; add ice cubes. 6. Ignite cotton string using a candle lighter. 7. Rotate wine bottle quickly until flame extinguishes (try to keep the flame burning as long as possible). 8. Submerge bottle in pot of cold water. The bottle should split apart above the string line almost immediately. 9. Cut a piece of copper wire approximately 24” long using the wire cutter. 10. Bend a hook on one end of the wire using the needle nose pliers. 11. Shape the other end of the wire into a graduated spiral using the pliers and your hand. 12. Tie a string onto the brass ring. 13. Attach the brass ring to the hook. 14. Drop a tea light into the spiraled wire. 15. Feed the string through the bottom of the wine bottle and through the neck. 16. Hang bottle; light candle. Alternative: For a simpler project, forgo steps 9-14 and place bottle over a votive candle. ww


Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014


WEDDINGS ashley and kyle

laura and scott

julie and kenny

ashley and amir

sarah and matt

amy and greg

katie and joe

amy and dave





Ashley and Kyle

How they met: Ashley and Kyle started dating

their senior year in high school. Kyle was Ashley’s first love, and she didn’t forget him when they parted ways for college. They remained friends and rekindled their romance five years later.

How he proposed: While vacationing on a

beach in the Dominican Republic, Kyle asked Ashley to walk with him along the shore. As they approached a fallen palm tree, Kyle pointed to a bottle planted



earlier that day. Ashley picked it up and discovered a note inside with a written proposal. Kyle recited the proposal as he bent down on one knee and asked her to marry him!

Why a winery wedding: Ashley and Kyle

always enjoyed the unique, intimate and romantic feel of a winery. Their wedding planner’s vision, passion and promise to create an unforgettable day came to life in the rustically-elegant setting of Owera Vineyards.   

PHOTOGRAPHER: Taken by Sarah Photography CATERER: Lincklaen House CAKE: Profiteroles Bakery FLORIST: Wegmans Florist INVITATIONS: Wedding Paper Divas WEDDING PLANNER: Kristie Fondario


Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

Favorite Wedding Moments Ashley will always remember a moment before the ceremony when Kyle yelled outside the bridal suite door, “Ashley, come out! I am ready to marry you now!” She also loved seeing the happiness in family and friends’ faces as she walked toward her soon-to-be husband. The best look, of course, was the smile and slightly misty eyes of Kyle waiting for her at the end of the aisle.





Julie and Kenny

How they met: Julie and Kenny met at Brown

University’s biomedical engineering PhD program orientation. They hit it off during a graduate class and discovered many shared commonalities, including growing up in New Jersey.

How he proposed: During a mini-getaway to

Block Island, Rhode Island, the couple rented bikes and rode around the island. They stopped at beaches and a little farm before reaching the top of a cliff overlooking



the ocean. After taking in the gorgeous view, Julie walked back to her bike and grabbed a blanket they could sit on. She returned to find Kenny on one knee holding an engagement ring.

Why a winery wedding: Julie and Kenny loved

the romantic setting of a winery. They desired a laid back but beautiful venue that accentuated elements from nature. The scenic Laurita Winery and vineyards didn’t require much decoration, as the views were gorgeous on their own.

PHOTOGRAPHER: Photography by Neil van Nierkerk CATERER: Conroy Catering FLORIST: The Loft Florist INVITATIONS: Wedding Paper Divas DJ: Signature DJs


Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

Favorite Wedding Moments The couple’s ceremony was simple with personalized wedding vows and a ceremony program that complemented their style. The most memorable moment occurred during the last song of the evening when guests formed a circle, arm-in-arm, and swayed to the music. Julie and Kenny danced in the middle, soaking up the love that surrounded them.





Amy and Greg

How they met: Amy and Greg met at a Motorcycle Dealer Showcase in Colorado. Greg lived in Wisconsin, a thousand miles from Amy in Colorado. They initially dated long distance with mini ski trips in the winter and motorcycle trips in the summer. A few years later, Amy packed her apartment and moved into Greg’s house.  

How he proposed: During a visit to Greg’s family in southern California, the couple enjoyed an evening out in Long Beach Harbor. After dinner, they strolled to the



end of the pier and sat on a bench overlooking a beautiful view of Queen Mary. A few moments later, Greg bent down on one knee and proposed.

Why a winery wedding: Prior to the couple’s engagement, they visited a vineyard in Napa Valley and commented, at the same time, how beautiful it would be to marry at a vineyard. Once they decided to say “I do” in Pennsylvania where Amy grew up, they immediately looked for the perfect winery venue.

PHOTOGRAPHER: Megan Zeller Photography CAKE: Crossing Vineyards FLORIST: Dahlia Florals DJ: Crossing Vineyards Event Coordinator


Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

Favorite Wedding Moments Amy and Greg will always remember their first look experience. It was such a wonderful, intimate moment before the guests arrived, and their photographer captured it beautifully. With photographs taken prior to the ceremony, they enjoyed spending more quality time with guests during the cocktail hour and reception.





Sarah and Matt

How they met: Sarah and Matt met their senior

year at Towson University when Matt drove his friend, who happened to be Sarah’s roommate, and Sarah home from class. Since the girls didn’t have a campus parking permit, Matt agreed to drive them to and from class each week for the entire semester. The rest is history!

How he proposed: Matt planned a beautiful

proposal in front of the St. Louis Cathedral in New Orleans. First, they enjoyed beignets and a delicious dessert at Café Du Monde. Before they left the restaurant it began to pour, so much that Sarah wasn’t interested in



walking to the cathedral. She eventually talked Matt into heading back to the hotel. Later that evening, he completely surprised her when he bent down on one knee and proposed. Despite the fact it didn’t go as planned, Sarah thought it was the perfect proposal.

Why a winery wedding: Sarah and Matt

searched for a beautiful and unique venue that could comfortably hold up to 200 guests. With an Italian family, a vineyard seemed like the perfect location. They fell in love with Running Hare Vineyard and booked it on the spot.

PHOTOGRAPHER: Dani Leigh Photography CATERER: Maryland Country Caterers CAKE: Sue Dzurec FLORIST: Floral Expressions INVITATIONS: Doyle Printing


Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

Favorite Wedding Moments Sarah’s most memorable moment occurred when she saw Matt for the first time while walking down the aisle with her dad. Their first dance was also unforgettable as they danced to their song for the first time as husband and wife.





Laura and Scott

How they met: During her junior year in college Laura's roommate invited a few friends over, including Scott. A friendship began between Laura and Scott that transitioned into a dating relationship.

How he proposed: Scott invited Laura out on

his family’s boat, and she suggested they bring a bottle of their favorite champagne ( just in case they had a reason to celebrate). After cruising around the Chesapeake Bay,



he anchored at an island and proposed. They immediately opened the champagne and celebrated.

Why a winery wedding: The wine loving

couple bought a house in Mount Airy soon after Scott proposed. It felt appropriate to marry in their new hometown, and they’ve always appreciated the amazing wines and gorgeous setting of Black Ankle Vineyards.

PHOTOGRAPHER: Magnolia Street Photography CATERER: Beefalo Bob’s CAKE: Homemade FLORIST: Blossom and Basket WEDDING PLANNER: Events by Lexi


Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

Favorite Wedding Moments Laura and Scott will always remember the first time they saw each other on their wedding day. Laura also recalls the cake cutting experience, when Scott decided to eat his piece of cake instead of feeding it to his new wife. The look on her face was priceless.





Ashley and Amir

How they met: Ashley and Amir met at the

neighborhood community pool. They chatted a few times during pool visits before venturing on their first date. They quickly fell in love.

How he proposed: Ashley’s best friend won

a free night’s stay at the Jefferson hotel in Richmond. Since she wasn’t available on the reservation date, Ashley volunteered herself and Amir to take her place. After checking in to the hotel, Amir guided her outside to a beautiful tree surrounded with flowers. Much to Ashley’s



surprised, he popped the question. Her best friend and another close couple met them for dinner to celebrate their engagement.

Why a winery wedding: As soon as the

couple turned onto Morais Vineyards’ drive Ashley was overwhelmed with that “feeling.” The grand tasting room took her breath away, and the beautiful vineyard was the perfect location for an elegant but intimate wedding. They couldn’t have picked a better venue.

PHOTOGRAPHER: Amanda Dorian Photography CATERER: Caroline Street Catering CAKE: The Icing INVITATIONS: Magnet Street WEDDING PLANNER: Occasions by M&K DJ: Eric Herod


Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

Favorite Wedding Moments The couple enjoyed every moment of their wedding day, including dancing all night long during the reception. A photo booth with props and a chocolate fountain were hits among the guests.





Katie and Joe

How they met: After Katie graduated high school in California, she moved back to the Northern Virginia area where she attended college. Following graduation, she accepted a communications position with Alion Science and Technology. She and Joe met while working on the same government contract.

How he proposed: The week before Thanksgiving

Joe surprised Katie with a weekend trip to Boston. On their way to dinner, Joe explained the significance of Boston. Not only was it Katie’s favorite city stateside, but it’s also where their families grew up. He wanted to start their lives to-



gether where their families started theirs, and asked if she’d marry him. She responded with an ecstatic “yes!”

Why a winery reception: Originally from

Massachusetts, the couple’s families share a love of seafood. So when Katie and Joe discovered Breaux Vineyard’s crawfish logo they decided to investigate more into the seemingly perfect venue option. They visited Breaux on an overcast December day, but even in the worst of weather Breaux’s views still proved gorgeous. After trying their wines, they knew Breaux was the best venue for their reception.

PHOTOGRAPHER: Pamela Lepold Photography CATERER: R&R Catering CAKE: ‘Chele-brations FLORIST: Growing Wild Floral Company INVITATIONS: The Dandelion Patch WEDDING PLANNER: Laura Ritchie with Events in the City


Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

Favorite Wedding Moments Katie fondly recalls the mother-son dance and her new husband singing along with her dad's band to Bon Jovi's "Living on a Prayer" at the reception. They felt so blessed to share their special day with friends and family. While there were many cherished moments, the couple especially loved joining in with their guests on the packed dance floor and celebrating throughout the reception.





Amy and Dave

How they met: Amy and Dave were introduced to



each other by Amy’s best friend. Dave was “pre-approved” and her perfect match.

left for vacation. After Dave picked up her ring he proposed again over breakfast. Now she has two engagement rings and adores them both.

How he proposed: While strolling down Oc-

Why a winery wedding: Amy and Dave

racoke Beach, Dave stopped and turned to Amy. He knelt down on one knee, held out a ring he made from driftwood and proposed. She quickly answered “yes,” and he explained her custom ordered ring wasn’t ready when they

desired a rustic, outdoor wedding that incorporated their love of wine. The venue was an easy decision when they discovered their local winery, Sanctuary Vineyards, hosted weddings.

PHOTOGRAPHER: Brooke Mayo Photography CATERER: High Cotton Barbeque and Slice Pizzeria CAKE: Great Cakes! INVITATIONS: Two Pooch Paperie WEDDING PLANNER: Margaret Arthur with the help of Proper Setting


Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

Favorite Wedding Moments Their dog Bentley, the ring bearer, stole the show when he trotted down the aisle before Amy and decided to relieve himself. His antics cut the nervous tension as everyone laughed. Following a wonderful vineyard ceremony, the couple enjoyed their ideal reception with local food, a live band and the love of family and friends. Moments leading up to the cake cutting were also special, as Amy waited to see if Dave would hold true to his word and not smash cake on her face. Though everyone cheered him on, he kept it clean.




WEDDINGS Close your eyes and picture the backdrop of your perfect day. A place filled with loved ones, laughter, celebration and the perfect soon-tobe spouse. It’s somewhere you always envisioned it would be, a destination like no other. Welcome to your wedding day. BY DIANE KOLANOVIC-ŠOLAJA Perks of a Destination Wedding

The beauty of a destination wedding is the unknown. You and your future spouse are probably the only ones in your family or circle of friends that have chosen something different. That, in itself, is truly a remarkable way to celebrate your love for one another. But, even more so, the event planning process becomes simpler. Opinions fade and those around you become supportive of your choice simply because they have never experienced a destination wedding. A decline in destination weddings due to the travel expense for your guests may be a blessing in disguise. Imagine the quality time you can spend with loved ones on your special day if you slash your guest list from 300 to 50. Spend that extra money on a few luxuries, like flying grandma first class or staying in a


posh suite. It’s a win-win situation for everybody. A winery or vineyard is a popular location for destination weddings. A winery offers incredible scenery that naturally adds to your event décor, and a lot of choices when it comes to guest entertainment.

Prioritize + Prepare for Your Destination

Everyone’s on board to help with your destination wedding. They’re excited and so are you. But where do you begin? First, prioritize. Simplify decision-making by focusing on the things that truly matter to you. Sit down with your sweetheart and list aspects of your wedding you value most. Next, educate yourself. Research your destination, possible reception locations and local vendors. Request details via email and schedule video

Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

conference calls. Take these communications as seriously as you would an in-person meeting. Speaking of in-person, visit your destination at least once before the wedding day. It will give you peace of mind to meet vendors and see properties. Create a timeline and to-do list. Analyze every task that needs to be done before, during and after the big day. Consider shipping methods, the weather and appropriate wedding attire. Give yourself enough time to complete all your tasks. Whether planning your nuptials at a beautiful vineyard in Napa, a winery in Virginia or a destination across the border, research marriage laws at the state and country level. You don’t want to return home from the honeymoon and realize your marriage is not recognized in your home state. If this sounds overwhelming, hire a wedding planner and designer. You

Photo courtesy of Honeymoon Islands

can fall back on their expertise and trust they have done this before.

BG Productions

Please, Thank You. (Welcome Gifts)

A welcome gift shows your guests how much you care. Put a little thought behind a quality gift and every guest will feel special. Do not overwhelm your guests with items they might toss away once they return home (i.e., cheesy souvenirs, a wedding t-shirt, anything that has your wedding date written on it). Instead, choose 3 to 5 products your guests can make use of while enjoying your wedding weekend.

Research what your wedding location is known for. Perhaps it’s a unique fruit or special music genre. Maybe you would prefer to highlight colors of the local scenery in your gift. Combine that with something quirky about yourselves and you will create the perfect wedding welcome gift. If you would like to add food, consider a local gourmet touch. Something sweet, something savory and something to sip is usually a good start. Consider gifting a wine bottle for guests to find when they first walk into their hotel rooms. Do not be afraid to allocate an extra $5 to $7 per gift; it will go a long way. Since your guests are taking the time and money to attend your wedding, you should take the time and money to purchase the best products. Keep it personal but luxurious. If putting together a gift is too much stress or just not your thing, try something different. Hand out shawls to your lady guests during the rehearsal dinner. Or ask the hotel to deliver “day after” kits to your guests’ rooms for a fun surprise after a fun wedding!

Plan (Winery Activities)

As the host of a destination wedding, provide your guests with an arrival and departure event along with an invitation to the rehearsal dinner. If your budget cannot fit all three, pick one and wow your guests. For an arrival event, host a trivia meet and greet combined with a blind wine tasting. The more wine and trivia, the more laughs. Consider hosting a picnic in the vineyard instead of a traditional rehearsal dinner, or try a chocolate and wine tasting reception to welcome your guests when they arrive at the destination. Keep it cozy after the wedding with a bonfire and s’mores for a late night snack. Say thank you with a brunch the day after your wedding. Looking for something totally different? Host a blending session. Your guests will feel like a wine maker for the day, while learning about winemaking techniques. They can create their own special blend of vino; a perfect keepsake! Don’t forget to explore and research the town outside of the winery as well. Provide information on bike rides, music festivals, local tours, museums or art exhibits. Open your eyes now. Your dream destination wedding is coming true. Now uncork that bottle of malbec, pour yourself a glass and celebrate. You’re getting married! ww To learn more about Diane’s adventures in destination planning, follow her @deekayevents. Diane enjoys travel, Nutella from the jar and anything that has to do with Croatia. Visit her website at www.deekayevents.com.



wine & dine Classic Wine Pairings Wine

Flavor Associations

Pairing Combinations


Apple, pear, pineapple, fig, honey, vanilla, butter, hazelnut

Chicken, pheasant, rabbit, pork, shellfish, cream sauce dishes


Floral, peach, apricot, pear

Crab, pork loin, sun-dried tomatoes, smoked oysters, ginger, mustard, cream sauce dishes

Sauvignon Blanc

Gooseberry, bell pepper, black pepper, green olives, herbs, citrus fruit

Goat cheese, oysters, fish, chicken pork, garlic, cilantro

Seyval Blanc

Citrus fruit, apple, pear, melon, sweet pea

Shellfish, chicken, veal, rabbit, mustard, ginger


Melon, apricot, nectarine, peach, citrus, fruit, apple, pear

Sole, trout, crab, turkey, spicy dishes, fish and meats, fennel, ham, ginger, almonds

Cabernet Franc

Violet, cherry, raspberry, herbal, pepper, tobacco, graphite, black currants

Chicken, turkey, garney, spicy meats, ham, tuna, salmon, redsauced pasta

Cabernet Sauvignon

Plum, herbs, mint, tea, chocolate, tobacco

Beef, lamb, braised barbecue, grilled meats, aged cheddar


Creamy, cherry, raspberry, plum, pepper, herbs, mint, tea, chocolate

Veal, meat loaf, Italian sausage, lamb, beef, almond, tuna, hearty pasta dishes, pizza

Petit Verdot

Blueberry, blackberry, black currant, toast

Beef, lamb, gumbo, jambalaya, spiced Thai dishes, barbeque meals


Raspberry, blackberry, plum, cherry, white pepper

Prosciutto ham, figs, blackened fish, grilled steak and salmon Contributed by Little Washington Winery

Wine Tasting Tips 1. Pour an inch or less of wine into your glass; progress from the lightest wines to the heaviest. 2. Observe the wine’s color. A young white wine exhibits pale yellow-green hues, revealing deeper shades of gold as it ages. Young red wine appears red or burgundy, displaying a hint of tawny brown as it ages. 3. Swirl the wine a few times on a flat surface. 4. Take a series of quick, short sniffs and process the scent. 5. Take a sip (not a gulp) and let the wine slide across your tongue from front-to-back and side-to-side.


Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

6. Retain your impressions of different wines by documenting answers to the following questions. • Is the wine light, medium or full-bodied? • Does the wine taste the same as its aroma? • Does the wine taste “balanced,” or does one element overpower the others? • How silky or rough does the wine feel on your tongue? • Does the wine taste sweet? • Does the wine taste acidic? • Does the wine taste fruity? • How strong is the alcohol?

Vendor Guide New York


Bridal Shows

Bridal Shops

The Wedding Salon

Honeymoon Planners

New Jersey

Elizabeth St. John Collection www.elizabethstjohn.com 301-879-7001

Wedding Planners


Dee Kay Events www.deekayevents.com 732-490-1780

Heather Bee Photography www.heatherbeephoto.com 571-289-5754


Magnolia Street Photography www.magnoliastreetphoto.com 301-898-2272

Photography by Neil van Niekerk neilvn.com 862-485-7276


Wedding Planners

To the "T" Events www.tothetevents.biz 215-548-2954

Emily Mora Makeup www.emilymoramakeup.com 434-272-9369


Amanda Dorian Photography amandadorian.com 540-693-0366 Astrid Photography www.myastrid.com 703-994-7718


Megan Zeller Photography www.meganzellerphotography.com 717-215-2874

Makeup Artists

Events by Lexi www.eventsbylexi.com 410-978-2048

District of Columbia

Custom by Nicole Photography www.custombynicole.com

Louizos E.L.P. Goldsmiths, Inc www.louizoselp.com 703-281-7454

Wedding Planners

Pennsylvania BG Productions www.bgproonline.com 215-435-1418

Jewelry Shops

Dani Leigh Photography www.danileighphotography.com 410-599-2866

Pretty Posh Events prettyposhevents.com 201-452-3751 Jessica Morrisy Photography jessicamorrisyphotography.com 732-280-0279

Honeymoon Islands www.honeymoonislands.com 703-753-8115

Dominique Attaway Photography www.dominiqueattaway.com 434-806-7263 E. Leise Photography www.specialdayphoto.com 804-615-8733

Inspired Photography by Susie and Becky www.photographybysusie.com

JMK Photos www.jmk-photos.com 434-825-2052


Josef Sullivan Photography josefsullivan.com 240-304-5128

Blush Bridal Boutique www.blushbridalboutique.com 703-753-8303

Whysall Photography www.whysallphotography.com 240-793-6193


Salon Emage www.salonemage.com 540-341-4052

Wedding Planners

Bridal Bellhop www.bridalbellhop.com 202-810-4022 Voila! Event Studios www.voilaeventstudio.com 571-337-0719

North Carolina

Bonnie Sen Creative Photography bonniesen.com 301-458-0397

Bridal Shops

Rothwell Photography www.rothwellphotography.com 540-383-3647


Brooke Mayo Photographers www.brookemayo.com 252-599-0720 Taken by Sarah Photography takenbysarah.com

Wedding Planners

Weddings by the Vine www.weddingsbythevine.com 919-415-1331

Pamela Lepold Photography www.weddingsbypamela.com 703-624-2159

Advertise with

wineryweddings Winery Weddings Magazine can be purchased online at www.wineryweddingmagazine.com. Submit your winery wedding photos to May Durkovic at editor@winerylove.com.



newlywed advice

By Sharon Naylor

Overcoming In-Law Disappointments


made a special recipe for a big holiday dinner and my mother-in-law didn’t even try it. I took my mother-inlaw to one of my favorite places for lunch and she said it was tacky. My sister-in-law never likes my Facebook posts. These may not seem like soulcrushing incidents, but when you’re trying to establish a close and loving relationship with your in-laws, disappointing reactions (or inactions) can crush just a little bit of your soul. You’re trying, but you still feel like an outsider. And that hurts. When your in-laws don’t react the way you want them to, it’s easy to think they don’t love you. Crying to your husband, who has no control over how his relatives act, is the real danger when coping with in-law disappointments. After all, he probably won’t call his mom and rave about your cooking or tell his sister to like your Facebook posts. Your husband, wanting you to have a close relationship with his family, may attempt to defuse the situation by saying, “Oh, she didn’t mean anything bad by that,” or the dreaded, “You’re making too much out of it.” You now feel like your husband doesn’t have your back; he’s taking their side in what is clearly an intentional slight. Soon, you’re in the middle of a terrible argument that could have been avoided if you took a breath and remembered that your in-laws are human. They may have been


distracted, clueless or simply have less-than-stellar social skills. For the sake of peace, incorporate the 5 Fs into relationships with your in-laws. First, Forgive, Forgive, Forgive. This is so important it merits three Fs. When you choose not to take disappointing in-law reactions personally, you stop yourself from revving up drama that could make the situation much worse. Next, Forget. Forget about rude or socially-awkward interactions with in-laws. Of course you’d like your mother-in-law to love your cooking or your taste in restaurants, and your sister-in-law to think your posts are clever and brilliant. But if they’re not reacting as you’d

Winery Weddings | Spring/Summer 2014

like, there’s nothing you can change about that. The final F is Forward. Look forward to a joyful future with your husband, which will be happier because you learned to quickly let go of in-law disappointment. The truth is this: your in-laws will disappoint you at times, and you will disappoint them. But each of you will get it right from time to time. Just look forward to those moments and they’ll be more likely to happen. ww Sharon Naylor is the bestselling author of over 35 wedding books, including 1001 Ways to Save Money…and Still Have a Dazzling Wedding www.sharonnaylor.net


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Photography by Neil van Nierkerk

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Winery Weddings Magazine  

Spring/Summer 2014

Winery Weddings Magazine  

Spring/Summer 2014