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P H O T O B Y F I N E T O O T H . T Y P O G R A P H Y B Y J A M E S A LY O U S I S .



Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014



BLEEDING GREEN: Fans of the Portland Timbers hope the Major League Soccer team’s winless season will soon turn around. Page 13.
















STAFF Editor-in-Chief Mark Zusman EDITORIAL Managing Editor for News Brent Walth Arts & Culture Editor Martin Cizmar Staff Writers Nigel Jaquiss, Aaron Mesh, Kate Willson Copy Chief Rob Fernas Copy Editors Matt Buckingham, Jessica Pedrosa Stage & Screen Editor Rebecca Jacobson Music Editor Matthew Singer Projects Editor Matthew Korfhage Books Penelope Bass Dance Aaron Spencer Theater Rebecca Jacobson Visual Arts Richard Speer Editorial Interns Laura Hanson, Kathryn Peifer, Cambria Roth

CONTRIBUTORS Emilee Booher, Ruth Brown, Nathan Carson, Rachel Graham Cody, Pete Cottell, Jordan Green, Jay Horton, AP Kryza, Nina Lary, Mitch Lillie, John Locanthi, Enid Spitz, Grace Stainback, Mark Stock, Michael C. Zusman PRODUCTION Production Manager Ben Kubany Art Director Kathleen Marie Graphic Designers Mitch Lillie, Amy Martin, Xel Moore, Dylan Serkin Production Interns Will Corwin ADVERTISING Director of Advertising Scott Wagner Display Account Executives Maria Boyer, Ginger Craft, Michael Donhowe, Kevin Friedman, Janet Norman, Kyle Owens, Sharri Miller Regan, Andrew Shenker Classifieds Account Executive Matt Plambeck Advertising Assistant Ashley Grether Marketing & Events Manager Steph Barnhart Give!Guide Director Nick Johnson

Our mission: Provide Portlanders with an independent and irreverent understanding of how their worlds work so they can make a difference. Though Willamette Week is free, please take just one copy. Anyone removing papers in bulk from our distribution points will be prosecuted, as they say, to the full extent of the law. Willamette Week is published weekly by City of Roses Newspaper Company 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Main line phone: (503) 243-2122 fax: (503) 243-1115 Classifieds phone: (503) 223-1500 fax: (503) 223-0388

DISTRIBUTION Circulation Director Mark Kirchmeier WWEEK.COM Web Production Brian Panganiban Web Editor Matthew Korfhage MUSICFESTNW Executive Director Trevor Solomon Associate Director Matt Manza TECHFESTNW Program Director Lizzy Caston OPERATIONS Accounting Manager Chris Petryszak Credit & Collections Shawn Wolf Office Manager/Receptionist Sam Cusumano A/P Clerk Andrea Iannone Manager of Information Systems Brian Panganiban Associate Publisher Jane Smith Publisher Richard H. Meeker

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Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014




Thank you, WW, for bringing attention to this issue [“The Fight for Justice for Oregon’s Transgender Inmates,” WW, April 16, 2014]. We desperately need prison reform in this country. Allowing institutionalized violence against transgender prisoners promotes institutionalized violence against all prisoners. Gay, straight, woman, man—whatever. No one is safe when society is allowed to treat prisoners as less than human. When you stand up for transgender prisoners, you are standing up for yourself. —“Melissa” Just reading this article makes me sick to my stomach—how can these prison officials get away with this? Our prison system needs to be changed to accommodate transgender people, and inhuman treatment of a prisoner should be punished by law. That these officials are still in their jobs is unbelievable; they need to be removed. —“Susi Rogler Lantz” There is such a thing as “cruel and unusual” punishment, and it is forbidden under the Eighth Amendment to the U.S. Constitution. Withholding necessary medical treatment has long been considered to meet the standard of “cruel and unusual.” Just because you’re convicted of a crime doesn’t mean you have no rights. —“Smattering” You’re asking the least enlightened state government agency to deal with one of the most complex socio/medical/sexual issues possible. Good luck with that. —“Irving Berliner”


GMO proponents think these crops can be a magic panacea that can solve the world’s problems [“Put a Label on It,” WW, April 16, 2014]. They don’t understand the market forces that drive innovation in this field aren’t pushing in those sorts of directions. The tone of this article is incredibly condescending, just like most of the fluoride articles. Don’t believe in medicating the water supply? You’re anti-science! Would like accuracy in food labeling? You’re anti-science! This is exactly what pushed many people to vote against fluoride, and it’s what’s going to push people to vote for GMO labeling. —“BigJared”


GMO labeling is not about the science, it’s very simple: give us the information so we can make our own decisions about what we buy and eat. The big chemical companies that create genetically modified foods have been operating in secret for too long. Consumers want transparency—especially in food products. —“worldly12”


Your paper edition should come with the warning: “Headlines not to be taken literally.” I nearly had a meltdown when I read the [front-page teaser] “The New Ziploc Ban.” Thinking the Portland City Council had found a new environmental evil to outlaw, I was starting to make alternate plans for storing my lunchbag snacks. But then I read the article [“Cloudy Days,” WW, April 16, 2014] and realized that WW was using “Ziploc” as a metonym for “marijuana storage and transport devices.” The question now is, what can I do with my stockpile of 527 boxes of Ziploc bags I rushed out to buy before this perceived “ban”? —“Thin-ice” LETTERS TO THE EDITOR must include the author’s street address and phone number for verification. Letters must be 250 or fewer words. Submit to: 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Fax: (503) 243-1115. Email: mzusman@

DR. KNOW ON VACATION: Marty Smith, aka Dr. Know, is on tour with his band, Slutty Hearts. His column will return April 30. Send questions to 4

Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014

Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014



COURTS: One defendant’s moves to delay justice—for years. POLITICS: Deborah Kafoury drinks up soft-drink money. SPORTS: The Portland Timbers may need an intervention. COVER STORY: The truth gets soaked in the city’s water debate.

Estate Jewelry

7 11 13 15

2328 NW Westover Road


Mayor Charlie Hales and City Commissioner Steve Novick are still moving toward a $12-a-month street fee on households and even higher taxes on businesses to raise more money for the Portland Bureau of Transportation. Both have said they may try to get the City Council to approve the fees without putting the question to voters on the November ballot (Murmurs, HALES WW, March 12, 2014). For the first time, two other commissioners, Nick Fish and Dan Saltzman, have said publicly they dislike bypassing voters. “I’m not absolutely convinced we need the street maintenance fee,” Saltzman tells WW. “The Transportation Bureau seems to be falling all over themselves to subsidize a bike-share program. If we have dollars to subsidize bike share, why don’t we have dollars to put in sidewalks and fix up our roads?” City Commissioner Amanda Fritz, as the tie-breaker, tells WW she will wait to see the proposal and listen to the public’s reaction before deciding how to vote.


Preservation advocates trying to save the decaying, 101-yearold Gas and Coke Building—on a polluted site along U.S. Highway 30 just south of the St. Johns Bridge—are making progress (“Wrecking Brawl,” WW, Dec. 18, 2013). They say the building’s owner, NW Natural, has offered it a reprieve from demolition—for a price. “They’re asking for upwards of $2 million,” says Kathy Evans, who’s led the charge to save the Gas and Coke Building. “We have conditionally accepted.” Evans adds the agreement would leave the building standing as a ruin, cleaned up but with no visitors allowed inside. NW Natural spokeswoman Melissa Moore confirms negotiations are ongoing. “If it were left up to us, we would, for many reasons, be taking it down,” Moore says of the building. “But we are giving this group an opportunity to save it if they can raise the funds.” As if East Portland needed more disappointment from City Hall: In 2009, the city’s East Portland Action Plan set 269 goals, ranging from bike lanes to cleaning up brownfields. But in a report released April 23, City Auditor LaVonne Griffin-Valade says the five-year window to keep these promises is closing, and funding is likely to disappear. “We found there are too many identified actions to be achieved within the plan’s ambitious timelines,” the deputy city auditors on her staff write. Officials overseeing the plan say they’ll narrow their focus to 29 priorities. But Griffin-Valade warns that the city’s Office of Neighborhood Involvement still hasn’t written a strategy for wrapping up its work. “One silver lining,” says director of audit services Drummond Kahn, “is that the plan brought increased focus and funding to East Portland.” Read more Murmurs and daily scuttlebutt. 6

Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014




Leo Zarosinski



When someone is charged with a crime, he has a constitutional right to a lawyer. He also has the right to a speedy trial. Once in a while, a defendant comes along who tries to stretch the limits of those rights. And few have done so in an Oregon courtroom quite like Andrew Franklin Kowalczyk. Facing federal charges of sexual exploitation of three young girls, Kowalczyk, 39, has for more than six years flouted prosecutors, thwarted judges and derailed, frustrated and even frightened the lawyers appointed by the court to represent him. “No one can take on the role of counsel for [Kowalczyk], because he takes steps, such as suing them, that create irreparable conflicts,” U.S. District Judge Michael

Mosman wrote last month. “By his own actions, [Kowalczyk] has made appointing him a lawyer impossible and repeatedly demonstrated his intention to use such appointments as a tactical delay.” It’s worked. Mosman said during a hearing last year that Kowalczyk’s “manipulative history” has created one of the longest pending criminal cases he’s seen in his 18 years on the bench. Kowalczyk’s trial date has been postponed 13 times. Kowalczyk says he can’t afford his own attorney, and his defense lawyers alone have so far cost taxpayers $382,000. That’s about the cost of paying for the defense in a death-penalty case. The most serious federal sex-offense cases take an average of less than nine months to adjudicate, according to court statistics. Even a typical federal terrorism case takes at most 22 months. Kowalczyk’s charges have been pending more than three times that long. The oddity of Kowalczyk’s case has created difficult legal issues for federal judges weighing his actions and the U.S. attorneys trying to convict him: When does a defendant waive his right to a lawyer, a speedy trial or both? Mosman ruled last year that Kowalczyk had lost his

right to a lawyer only after he fired his eighth lawyer. The judge later appointed a ninth lawyer, who has since left the case. “The right to counsel is a fundamental constitutional principle,” says Caroline Davidson, an assistant professor at Willamette University College of Law. “Most courts would not do it lightly.” But the delays continue, putting the government’s case against Kowalczyk at risk. “There are victims for whom justice is not being served,” says Gary Sussman, one of the U.S. attorneys prosecuting the case. “There is an enormous government resource drain, and memories fade over time. It’s more difficult to prove a case.” Today, Mosman is preparing to rule whether Kowalczyk—who’s being held in the Multnomah County jail—is mentally competent to stand trial. Kowalczyk’s father, John, points to his son’s long history of mental-health problems, and says his physical condition has worsened while in jail. He says there is no reason his son would want to delay his own case. “He’s nowhere near normal,” John Kowalczyk says. “Where he needs to be is in a mental institution. That’s where he would get the treatment and the care that he needs. Prison is just a death sentence for him.” But a psychologist for the government—and at least one of Kowalczyk’s former defense attorneys—believes Kowalczyk has proven he’s competent to stand trial. Andrew Kowalczyk, through his father, declined to speak to WW for this story, as did the judges, investigators and defense attorneys. But court records in Oregon and Washington tell the story of a case that highlights the tension between proWillamette Week APRIL 23, 2014


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Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014


Andrew Kowalczyk already had a record of assault, weapons charges and child abuse when police arrested him outside the Northwest Motor Inn in Puyallup, Wash., two days after Christmas 2007. Hours earlier, Kowalczyk, a Portland resident, had took off from police during a traffic stop and eluded them after a high-speed chase. When officers searched Kowalczyk’s bags, they found counterfeit $50 bills, fake ID cards and a laptop computer. On the computer, they discovered images and videos of a man raping and sodomizing two toddlers and a third girl who appeared slightly older. Police decided the man in the pictures was Kowalczyk. According to prosecutors, Kowalczyk allegedly raped the children in Oregon and then took the images into Washington, making it a federal crime. He was eventually charged with nine counts of sexual exploitation of a minor. Because of his criminal history, a conviction could send him to prison for life. A judge appointed federal public defender Francesca Freccero to the case in October 2009, after Kowalczyk was extradited from Washington. Two months later, she fi led a three-line motion to withdraw from the case. She said a conflict had arisen and she wanted out. Lake Oswego lawyer Matthew Schindler was appointed in Freccero’s place. Schindler had represented more than 200 federal defendants by then and was known for succeeding with difficult clients—half his cases were handme-downs from other lawyers who could not handle them. But Kowalczyk was too much. Schindler—in a sealed declaration later made public by a judge—said Kowalczyk made hundreds of “pointless” demands for records and ordered him to make legal decisions that Schindler thought unwise. Kowalczyk ordered Schindler to fire everyone on his staff. He had to fight off a lawsuit filed by Kowalczyk’s father that accused Schindler of defamation. The lawsuit dragged on for two years before an appeals court judge dismissed it in January. “I have never had to endure anything remotely resembling what I have been through with [Andrew] Kowalczyk,” Schindler, who lasted 10 months as his attorney, wrote in a motion to withdraw. “He is rude, threatening and abusive. Through his letters, he has called me incompetent, lazy, stupid, and has repeatedly expressed his dissatisfaction with my representation.” Schindler declined to discuss the case with WW. Kowalczyk’s third set of attorneys, Michael Levine and Matthew McHenry, tried twice to withdraw from the case. U.S. District Judge Garr King approved the motion in 2011 after they had spent five months trying to repre-


tecting a defendant’s rights while not allowing him to run amok in the court system—and make his alleged victims suffer even more. “It matters that it’s lasted such a long time because [the victims] have to be continually reminded of this,” says Lynn Travis, program director for Court Appointed Special Advocates of Portland. “It’s a piece of their lives they don’t get to put to rest.”

IN HIS OWN DEFENSE: Andrew F. Kowalczyk has been serving time in the Multnomah County Jail while his federal trial on sexual exploitation charges has been delayed more than a dozen times.

ONE LAWYER CONTINUED TO REPRESENT KOWALCZYK EVEN AFTER THE DEFENDANT THREATENED TO STAB HIM IN THE EYE WITH A PENCIL. sent Kowalczyk. Levine later suffered from heart problems that made it difficult to continue on the case. Before that, however, he and McHenry had already sought to separate themselves from Kowalczyk. “To describe the relationship between Mr. Kowalczyk and current counsels as ‘antagonistic, lacking in trust, and quarrelsome’ would be a significant understatement,” the lawyers wrote in an appeal to the court. That’s when Noel Grefenson, a lawyer from Salem, took over. He was Kowalczyk’s seventh attorney, and the trial date had been postponed six times. Grefenson had worked as a defense attorney for 23 years, often agreeing to represent unsavory and challenging defendants. He stayed on even after Kowalczyk threatened to stab him in the eye with a pencil, left a message with legal staff saying Grefenson was playing “death-wish games,” and told the lawyer he knew where his family lived and they would never be safe. “The degree of my interactions with the defendant far exceeds that of any client that I have represented since joining the bar in 1988,” Grefenson told a judge in 2012. “I felt it was necessary in this case.”


Grefenson knew Kowalczyk wanted to mount a new defense: that he was mentally incompetent to stand trial. He told the court he’d seen Kowalczyk carry out legal research and prepare complex motions. “I have not seen anything…which leads me to suspect that the defendant is not competent to aid and assist in his own defense,” Grefenson told the court in October 2012. Grefenson got off the case after Kowalczyk filed a lawsuit and bar complaint against him. (Both have since been dismissed.) Judge King gave Kowalczyk one more chance, appointing veteran Clackamas lawyer Mark Cross to represent him. If he fi red Cross or sued him, King said, the court would view that as a waiver of his right to representation. Facing the same treatment as the other attorneys, Cross lasted six months. The other federal judge on the case, Mosman, ruled in May 2013 that Kowalczyk had exhausted his right to a lawyer. Twice, the U.S. 9th Circuit Court of Appeals has rejected Kowalczyk’s plea for another court-appointed attorney. Donald True, a Portland clinical psychologist hired by John Kowalczyk, told the court earlier this month that Andrew Kowalczyk is unfit. John Kowalczyk tells WW that his son hears voices, sees things that aren’t there and believes his lawyers have been colluding with the government as part of “Satan’s army” to put him away for life. “It doesn’t benefit him to stay in the Multnomah County Jail,” John Kowalczyk says. “He’s gained nearly 200 pounds and has all kind of health issues.” The government’s psychologist says Kowalczyk’s insanity plea is “disingenuous” and “contrived.” “It is clear that Mr. Kowalczyk is malingering,” clinical psychologist Richart DeMier wrote in an evaluation last June. After hearing testimony earlier this month from both experts, Judge Mosman will review the reports and rule whether Kowalczyk can stand trial. “The legal test is only these two main issues: Do you understand the charges against you, and can you assist in your defense?” explains Valerie Hans, a professor at Cornell University Law School. “If he’s filing motions without any help, I would guess the judge would look very favorably on that.” If a defendant is found incompetent, Hans says, he wouldn’t be set free. “It’s not like you’re going to a country club,” she says. “It would be a secure facility dealing with people who have a combination of criminal activity and mental health problems.” The toddlers Kowalczyk allegedly abused might not recall the crimes or be called to testify. But they are nearly teenagers today and have been kept in limbo by Kowalczyk’s actions. “Seven years, 13 continuances and nine lawyers—this is appalling,” says Meg Garvin, executive director of the National Crime Victim Law Institute at Lewis & Clark Law School. “You can’t really grapple with the next stage of your life when this stage is not completely over.”

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Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014


22nd Annual

Spring Paddle Festival At Vancouver Lake

SATURDAY & SUNDAY, APRIL 26-27 9AM — 4PM Kayak, SUP & Canoe Demos - All Day! 100 boats on the beach and ready to try!

OFFERED ALL DAY, BOTH DAYS First strokes: 1 hour intro to kayak & canoe


Spring Sale April 25-May 5th

Which Boat is Right for Me?: 20 minute clinics

SATURDAY: 11:00am

Local Paddling Destinations Fishing By Kayak Stand Up Paddling Choosing the Perfect Paddle


Paddling with Kids What Floats your Boat Car Topping your Kayak, Canoe & SUP


Dressing For Conditions Packing a Kayak for Multi-Day Trips Rescue & Re-entries Demonstrations


Dream Trips of the Northwest Forward Stroke Clinic Safety and Rescue for Kayak Fishermen Willamette River Water Trail


Car Topping your Kayak, Canoe & SUP Stand Up Paddling Choosing a Paddle


Dressing for Conditions Yoga For Paddling


Boat Repair in the Field Stand Up Paddling


Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014


Choosing the Perfect Paddle Fishing By Kayak

SUNDAY: 9:30am

Edging and bracing Kayak Fishing 10 Essentials of safety & repair

11:00 am

Basic Canoeing Assisted and solo rescue and recoveries Stand Up Paddling Paddling For Women Dream Trips of the Pacific Northwest

Jantzen Beach Jamboree!

Sat. April 26th 4PM-7PM BBQ / Beverages / Music SPECIAL DEALS ON: new, used, and closeout boats and accessories Jantzen Beach store 200 NE Tomahawk Dr *note Boat House store location will be closed Saturday during event.

12:00 pm

Dressing For Conditions

1:00 pm

Paddling for Women Stand Up Paddling Trip Leadership Fundamentals (2 hour course) Local Paddling trips

2:30 pm

Stand Up Paddling Kayak Fishing Dressing For Conditions Paddle tour of Vancouver Lake Packing a kayak for a multiday tour 3:15 pm Paddling in weather: Skegs, rudders, trim

Alder Cup 2014

Kayak Polo Tournament Sunday, 27 10AM - 3PM Directions to Vancouver Lake

Take I-5 to Vancouver, exit on either Mill Plain or 4th Plain and go west. Mill Plain and 4th Plain merge into Lower River Road, follow signs to Vancouver Lake.

Alder Creek Kayak & Canoe | 200 NE Tomahawk Isl Dr | Portland, OR 97217 | 503.285.0464 |






If you make or sell soda pop, you’ve got a lot to worry about from Multnomah County. The county’s health department has targeted sugary soft drinks as a top worry, especially in the fight against childhood obesity. Internal county emails made public last year show that then-County Chairman Jeff Cogen was weighing whether to impose a tax on soft drinks similar to the one being pushed by then-New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg. And if you’re a soda giant—like, say, Coca-Cola—what happens in one Oregon county may not make a dent in your worldwide sales, but soft-drink companies have made clear they will fight soda taxes and bans wherever they surface. “Soft-drink issues are continuing to come up in the Legislature and at the local government level,” says Rob Douglas, a lobbyist for the Oregon Soft Drink Association. “That is our concern.” That’s why money from Big Soda in the race for county chair has become a compelling topic—and a surprising twist in the campaign. Former Multnomah County Commissioner Deborah Kafoury has accepted $5,000 each from Coca-Cola and the Oregon Soft Drink Association, through its political action committee. (It’s the biggest single political contribution the Oregon Soft Drink PAC reports giving so far this year.) Kafoury’s opponent, former City Commissioner Jim Francesconi, is calling her out for taking the soft-drink money. “To have that level of contribution from an entity when the county needs to regulate obesity and control it is very questionable,” Francesconi says. Under previous county administrations, the health department took an aggressive approach to other public health issues such as the use of trans fats and restaurantmenu calorie labeling. In addition, county leaders, including Kafoury, who served as a commissioner from 2009 through 2013, has pushed for the authority to levy local taxes on products such as alcohol and tobacco. Kafoury has been an anti-soda crusader. As a state representative, she sponsored a bill in 2001 that would have banned sales of sugared soft drinks in Portland Public Schools. The soft-drink lobby fought the bill, which didn’t pass. Douglas says he’s aware Multnomah County pondered various policies regarding soda under Cogen but says his group has had no specific discussions about potential taxes or regulation with Kafoury. Anna Arodzero, a lobbyist for Coca-Cola, says her employer contributed to Kafoury because the company has an operation in Portland and many employees who live in the county. Company executives, she adds, think Kafoury is the best choice in the race. “We’ve had a long-term relationship with Deborah Kafoury dating back to her time as a state legislator,” Arodzero says. “We really believe that she’s a strong and proven leader and the right person for this job.” Arodzero concedes Coca-Cola is wary of soda taxes.

SWEET: Soft-drink companies seeking to avoid local taxes or restrictions on their products have a lot at stake in the race for Multnomah County chair. Industry contributions of $10,000 have helped Deborah Kafoury in her fundraising. She’s brought in $330,000 compared to $224,000 for her chief opponent, Jim Francesconi.

ONE QUESTION No local government agency delivers more health care than Multnomah County. Aside from running the jails, it’s the biggest thing the county does. According to its latest budget, Multnomah County will spend $265 million this year funding public health, clinics, mental health and addiction services. About $114 million comes from the county’s general fund, while state and federal agencies largely provide the rest. Yet the county’s health-care mission has skidded sideways in the past year. Former health department director Lillian Shirley got arrested on a domestic violence charge last year (her estranged husband, the victim of her attack, declined to press charges) before she left to work for the state of Oregon. One of her top deputies, Sonia Manhas, engaged in an aff air with then-Chairman Jeff Cogen, which cost both of them their jobs. The county is busy erasing Manhas’ legacy—its current budget does away with her old job—and voters in the May 20 primary must pick a replacement for Cogen. The two leading candidates, Jim

Francesconi and Deborah Kafoury, have both made changes in the county’s health mission a key part of their campaigns. Francesconi, who served as a Portland city commissioner from 1997 through 2004, has made economic development and closing of the income gap his key message. Kafoury, a former three-term state lawmaker and two-term county commissioner, says her experience in working on public health issues makes her the better choice. So we asked them this question: If elected county chair, what’s the fi rst big change you’d make to the county’s health department?

Deborah Kafoury: “Right now, the [interim] chair

“Taxation is not a direction that we hope state or local governments go,” she says. “It would be of concern to us if the county considered a tax.” Kafoury says she’s made no representations about what she would do regarding soft drinks if elected. “I don’t make promises to contributors,” Kafoury says, “and I don’t do things that I don’t believe in. It’s unfortunate my opponent is choosing to make an issue of these contributions.” In fact, although Francesconi has criticized Kafoury for taking soda money, Arodzero says he called her seeking to talk with her and other Coke employees. When WW asked Francesconi about the call, he denied calling Arodzero in her capacity as a lobbyist for Coke. He says he called Arodzero for a contribution because she served on the Portland board of the Boys and Girls Clubs.

of Multnomah County [Marissa Madrigal] is not focused on healthcare transformation. The biggest change would be a focus on it. Health-care transformation is so huge and the eff ects of it have still yet to be seen on the county. For example, one in every 10 residents of Multnomah County gets their health care through the county through one of our health clinics. Presumably, the majority of those people are now going to have insurance, and so they can chose where they get their care. We need to be heavily involved to see that mental-health piece of health-care transformation come to fruition, because what’s going on with [coordinated care organizations] is not full integration at this point.”

Jim Francesconi: “It makes no sense to me to have mental health in one department and physical health in another. The fi rst change I’d make is combining them. That’s been done everywhere. You have to integrate family care with mental-health care and elevate the role of mental health. And really elevate the county’s focus on mental health. I don’t know how you talk about homelessness without talking about mental health and addiction. It’s a big reason homelessness has gone up 8 percent in the past two years in this city.” NIGEL JAQUISS.

Francesconi says he called other members of the nonprofit’s board for support as well. “I didn’t even know she was the lobbyist for CocaCola,” Francesconi said last week. Arodzero tells WW Francesconi clearly indicated in a phone message he was interested in her company’s support. “He left me a message wanting to talk to me and CocaCola employees about his race for county chair,” Arodzero says. “I’m happy to share the message with him if he doesn’t recall what he said.” WW shared a copy of the voice mail with Francesconi, and he acknowledged making the call. “I did not remember that I knew she was an employee of Coca-Cola, but I obviously did,” Francesconi says. “So I was wrong. That’s my voice. I made that call. I did know. I just didn’t remember that.” Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014


Audition June 9th & 10th 3:30-6:30


Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014


Jerek Hollender




The Portland Timbers are supposed to be one of the dominant teams in Major League Soccer. The 2013 campaign saw the team soar to the Western Conference final after an abysmal performance a year earlier. This season, the team’s best players have returned with new talent intended to bolster the winning strategy of second-year coach Caleb Porter. The media narrative around the Timbers so far has been that they just need time to jell and settle into their style of play. They have shown real promise. They will be brilliant any moment now. But that storyline tiptoes around a basic fact: The Timbers, despite all their talent and promise, are so far one of the worst teams in MLS. Winless after seven games. Third from the bottom in terms of points for and goals allowed. The Timbers’ only score on the road came from the other team’s own goal. The team has a worse record now than it did at the same stage during the fiasco that was the 2012 season. “ We’ve been gloomy for a month,” says Roscoe Myrick, a contributor to the blog and podcast Portland Timbros. “If we were bad, it would be fine. It would be like dying in your sleep. But we’re good, and we’re not getting results. It feels like you’re waking up while someone’s ripping out your heart and you have to eat it.” It doesn’t seem right that the team’s playoff hopes look so dim so soon in the season. But Portland is on a trajectory to mediocrity without some big changes. Here’s what seems to be going wrong— and what the Timbers can still do about it.

The back line is a mess. In the past five games, the Timbers’ defense has given up late goals that have robbed the team of wins and key draws. Without allowing those late scores, the Timbers would have 11 points, not four. They would be one of the league’s better teams, and we wouldn’t be having this conversation. Since the team joined MLS, the Timbers’ defense has often been a problem. In the offseason, Porter went looking for an answer to the inconsistent play of the

fit to be tied: the Portland timbers’ 4-4 draw against the Seattle Sounders on April 5 at Providence Park typified the late-game collapses that have hurt the team’s record. Above, veteran timbers midfielder Kalif Alhassan battles for the ball during the Seattle match.

team’s defensive line and came up with Argentinian Norberto Paparatto. “ He is technica lly a nd tactica lly sound,” Porter said during the preseason. “We look forward to integrating him into an already deep back line.” Paparatto has since been benched after blunders that allowed the Seattle Sounders to rally for a 4-4 draw after the Timbers were up by two goals with five minutes left to play. Paparatto hasn’t been the only problematic acquisition this year, but the shuffling around of him and defenders Mamadou “Futty” Danso and Pa Modou Kah has underscored the back line’s inconsistencies. “Heading into the offseason, they knew they had to get better defensively,” ESPN columnist Jeff Carlisle says. “I think they thought they solved that problem by getting Norberto Paparatto. He certainly has not delivered.”

The midfield is off-kilter. The Timbers’ game plan is built around keepi ng possession of t he ba l l a nd intricate, of ten complicated passing combinations. If they have the ball, their opponents can’t hurt them. And if they move it around quickly enough, they can open up gaps in the opposition and create opportunities to split the defense with a killer pass. “There’s immense skill there that should be able to take over games at this level,” Timbers Army board member Jeremy Wright says. This year, statistics show, the Timbers’ passing and possession game has eroded.

Last year, only Real Salt Lake and Sporting Kansas City—the two teams that met in the 2013 championship— had more possession time than the Timbers. This year, Portland has dropped from third to eighth in the possession table, and in terms of how often the team successfully passes the ball, the Timbers have sunk from third to 12th. “It seems like they’ve got more ballplayers in the lineup,” Carlisle says, “but whatever the reason, the balance isn’t right.” Left winger and 2013 standout Rodney Wallace, sidelined with a knee injury, has been replaced alternately by Kalif Alhassan and Gastón Fernández, another new signing. Fernández has been impressive. The Argentine has scored twice this season, both last-minute equalizers in the team’s first t wo games. But Fernández and Alhassan both prefer to drift into the center—unlike Wallace, who liked to play wide and gave midfielders Diego Valeri and Darlington Nagbe an outlet for their creative passing and moves. The Timbers have said Wallace could return sometime between May and July. “Maybe when Rodney comes back,” Portland Timbros’ Myrick says, “that alleviates the situation.” The Timbers have two slots open for designated players—players whose wages aren’t counted against the team’s salary cap. Myrick says the Timbers could use those to boost the roster if things don’t improve. “What could happen,” Myrick says, “especially if the team continues to struggle, is you’re going to see some really big signings.”

Morale and mentality are low. In the past week, there have been murmurs from inside the Timbers camp that something isn’t right with the team’s mentality. Carlisle thinks the team may be the victim of its success in 2013, when it reached the Western Conference final and drew plaudits from across American soccer. “Another difference this year is, there were very high expectations,” he says. “That can play tricks on the psyche of a team.” Credit Porter with trying (at least publicly) to continue to be upbeat, almost to a fault. In Utah last weekend, the Timbers played well in a 1-0 loss to Real Salt Lake. Porter told reporters afterward that the Timbers looked like the better team. “We have the better of the game, we had the better chances on the day,” Porter said in comments that have echoed other postgame observations. “The game went according to plan…outside of the finishing, outside of the result.” It’s not clear how long Porter has before such explanations wear thin. After the loss to Real Salt Lake, one player, captain Will Johnson, was as blunt about the rosy spin about the woeful Timbers as he is against opponents on the field. “I’m a little bit sick and tired of hearing that,” Johnson was quoted at MLSsoccer. com when asked what he thought about all the talk of positive signs as the team keeps drawing and losing. “It’s all about results.” With the scaling back of expectations for the team, though, there can be benefits. Wright says he sees a silver lining. “It’s good,” he says, “to be underdogs again.” Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014



Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014




st i n oney a f g n i a r e f lo w


d e r e Here’s the unfilt

ortland’s hidden treasure lies nearly 50 miles east of the city, ringed by Douglas fir and protected by gates and guards. Bull Run Lake, a rain-fed oval nestled in the shadow of Mount Hood, supplies Portland with drinking water of legendary clarity. The spot has the majesty of a national park—the lake reflects the hue of close-in clouds, as if it were part of the sky—except nobody gets to visit unless closely supervised by government chaperones. The surrounding forest is so isolated and rugged that on a recent visit, a bear was wandering across the access road. At night, only two human beings dwell inside these 147 square miles of forbidden land: a treatment-plant operator and a ranger keeping watch over the water, among the purest of any city’s in the nation. That water flows out of the lake, into the Bull Run River and eventually through two reservoirs before being piped into the city. Unlike Portland’s other vaunted accomplishments—from mass transit to bike lanes—the Bull Run Watershed isn’t the result of clever thinking. Instead, it’s the city’s natural inheritance: a blessing that offers a foundation for the kind of healthy living that makes this metropolis so attractive. Portland has been drawing on Bull Run water since 1895, with City Hall overseeing its management for 101 years. It may not last to 102. This May, city voters will decide on Measure 26-156, which would strip Bull Run—as well as all the pipes that deliver water and carry away sewage—from the control of City Hall. Instead, a new seven-member board, elected by voters, would control the city’s water and sewer system, and set rates. The drive for changes comes from a handful of corporations that have joined forces with longtime neighborhood activists. They say exploding water and sewer rates have been driven up by uncontrolled costs and unnecessary projects, making Portland’s rates among the highest in the nation. And these businesses—who pay the biggest bills—blame

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the costs on an unchecked and unaccountable City Council approving construction projects. “These things are like zombies,” says Kent Craford, copetitioner on the May measure. “They never die. You have to stab it in the heart.” By the typically passive-aggressive standards of Portland elections, the campaign to create a new water district is a knife fight in the gutter. Mayor Charlie Hales last month declared in his State of the City address that the May ballot initiative is a “costly and sinister scheme”—and that was after he called its backers “clowns.” City Commissioner Nick Fish says the measure is a corporate plot to destroy the city’s water supply, and calls it part of a vast right-wing conspiracy. The measure’s creators, meanwhile, are partial to vivid metaphors. They say the city’s water and sewer spending has created a kind of municipal-industrial complex that feeds consultants, contractors and other experts who in turn keep the city’s politicians in office. Craford says those in City Hall are “sucking on the sewer trough.” Both sides have filed complaints with the Elections Division of the Office of the Secretary of State of Oregon, saying their foes are violating election laws. Both sides say they have the answers to fixing what ails Portland’s water and sewer system. And both claim their opponents’ position spells doom for the cherished Bull Run Watershed. The fight has only succeeded in confusing—and unsettling—Portland voters. Maybe it’s because anti-government business interests are demanding an entirely new layer of government to oversee the Water and Environmental Services bureaus, with their combined annual budget of $682.5 million, more than 1,080 employees, and assets worth nearly $20 billion. Maybe it’s an aftertaste from last year’s bitter fluoride wars, which proved the spirit of populism still hovers over the region’s waters. Or, just maybe, it’s the size of those water and sewer bills. But now Portland voters face one of the most consequential decisions ever put before them in the city’s history. That’s why WW is taking a closer look at the claims made by both sides of the water fight—testing what’s clean, and what’s crap. CONT. on page 17

Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014


cont. aaron mesh


HOW’S YOUR GLASS?: Bull Run Lake, sitting just below Mount Hood at an elevation of 3,162 feet, is the source of Portland’s drinking water. An 1894 city report declared Bull Run water had “purity…probably unexcelled anywhere in the world.” 16

Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014

CONT. The measure’s backers say: Portland has some of the highest water and sewer rates in the country. That’s certainly true. And it didn’t used to be. Portland’s water rate has jumped 160 percent since 2000, while the sewer rate has increased 164 percent over the same 14 years, according to city figures. That means Portlanders’ monthly bills now dwarf those of similarly sized cities. (See chart at right.)

The measure’s critics say: Water and sewer rates are going up because of costs beyond the city’s control— especially the Big Pipe project.


he Big Pipe is Portland’s answer to Boston’s Big Dig: a public works project that took forever and citizens keep paying for. But the Big Pipe is also one of Portland’s great environmental achievements. It’s a $1.4 billion series of, yes, huge sewer pipes. They take the city’s network of raw sewage and send it to two wastewater treatment plants. W hich doesn’t sound that impressive, until you remember that before the Big Pipe was completed just three years ago, human ordure spilled into the Willamette River after every heavy rainfall. The construction wasn’t wholly voluntary: The city began building the Big Pipe in 1991, pressured by a lawsuit by Northwest Environmental Advocates charging that the city’s sewer overflows violated the Clean Water Act. Finished on time and under budget, the Big Pipe has been an environmental success: The city is now considering building a swimming beach along the Willamette this year. The price tag for the Big Pipe is in fact a central reason why sewer rates have continued to rise. But that doesn’t explain why water rates are so high. City officials say the biggest cost drivers for water rates are also construction projects—including recently completed towers that draw the coldest water from Bull Run, a new pipeline across the Sandy River that was built in 2009 at a cost of $25 million, and especially the $279 million in costs for the current construction of new underground reservoirs. (We’ll get to those in a minute.) Fish, the city commissioner who took over the utilities in June, says the city can’t both meet its construction obligations and keep rates flat. He says the cost of maintaining the system—along with environmental projects other cities haven’t begun to address—requires billing hikes. “You cannot go below zero without doing violence to the system,” Fish says. “The reality is, you can’t. And if it makes anyone feel better, we are in the same boat as every other city in America.” But if the city is right that the rates are out of its

AWASH IN BILLS Portlanders’ monthly water and sewer bills now dwarf those of similarly sized cities. A 2013 survey of monthly water bills shows Portland’s rates are the seventh-highest among the 50 largest U.S. cities. Here’s how Portland ranks among those in the West.

Typical Monthly Combined Water and Sewer Bills



$80 $68.17



$36.57 $37.15



$28.23 $21.03






s s e o d is er ttl ga an ele apol isc nv ea rtl Ve nc ng S e o a s A r n P n s La nF Mi Lo Sa


S O U R C E : B L A C K & V E ATC H 5 0 L A R G E S T C I T I E S WAT E R / WA S T E WAT E R S U R V E Y, A P R I L 2 0 1 3

control, why did Hales promise during his campaign for mayor that he would “lower” water and sewer rates, only to raise the combined rates by 4.8 percent when he took office? Hales explains: “We couldn’t get the rates to zero,” the mayor tells WW, “because our water pipes are up to 100 years old and our water reservoir is 20 miles from town.” This hasn’t pleased commercial ratepayers—which include German semiconductor manufacturer Siltronic and Hilton hotels. They found common frustration with a ratepayer coalition, led by Alaska Seaplanes co-owner Craford. Since 2002, he has fought “unnecessary capital projects” and tried to stop rate hikes. But Hales’ pledge and then his backtracking have caused Craford and his allies to lose patience. “I’ve been at it on these issues for 12 years,” Craford says. “We worked within the process for 11 of those years. It was only after the mayor who promised in his campaign to lower water rates got into office and actually raised them that we decided nothing was ever going to change.”


The measure’s backers say: The reason rates are so high is, the utilities are badly managed and a nest of cronyism.


ortland’s charter is crystal clear how the City Council may spend money from water and sewer bills: for water and sewer expenses. The charter mandates that sewer rates fund only “design, construction, acquisition, operation, maintenance and contract requirements of sewage treatment or purification and related facilities.” It contains similar restrictions on the Water Bureau. But the City Council has ignored these rules for years. The most fl agrant flouting came under the administration of former City Commissioner Randy Leonard, who used Water Bureau money to fund a litany of pet projects—many with little or no connection to water. For example, Leonard and his colleagues on the City Council spent $1.6 million in ratepayer money in 2009 to turn a decaying city building into a new headquarters for the nonprofit that runs the Rose Festival. Even Water Bureau director David Shaff, who oversaw the spending under Leonard, concedes spending this ratepayer money was a mistake. “I wouldn’t have done the Rose Festival building,” Shaff says. “If it were entirely up to me, I would have bulldozed the thing. That wasn’t Council’s finest hour.” In 2011, ratepayers sued the city for $127 million, challenging spending of water and sewer dollars on dozens of projects. The litigants weren’t just anti-government cranks. They included a dyed-in-the-wool Democrat and former city commissioner: Lloyd Anderson, who oversaw the Water Bureau from 1970 to 1974. (The lawsuit was funded by a group of anonymous donors affi liated with Craford.) Last month, a Multnomah County circuit judge ruled that a small part of that spending, $1.2 million, did indeed violate the city charter. While that spending may only be a fraction of water and sewer costs, it does nothing to change the perception that the Water Bureau and the Bureau of Environmental Services are not models of efficiency. In 2010, City Auditor LaVonne Griffin-Valade told the Bureau of Environmental Services it could save more than $1 million a year in overhead by canceling an agreement with the Portland Bureau of Transportation to maintain its pipes and doing the work itself. “The same staff and equipment would likely be used to perform the work,” Griffi n-Valade wrote. “Since BES is primarily funded by utility ratepayers, lower costs could be passed along in the form of lower rates.” Environmental Services has not canceled the agreement. Last month, a study conducted by Fish and fellow City CONT. on page 19

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PIPE DREAMS: New construction, like a $25 million project in the Bull Run Watershed that includes installing these pipes, is the single largest factor in Portland’s rising water bills.

Commissioner Steve Novick examined how many bureaus have managers who oversee three or fewer employees. The three worst offenders? The Police and Water bureaus each have 33 managers who supervise three employees or fewer, while the Bureau of Environmental Services has 29. No other city bureau has more than 14. Craford paints a picture of cronyism in which groups that oppose his measure have conflicts of interest. He points to one opponent of his measure, the Audubon Society of Portland. The group has a $42,290 city contract with Environmental Services to count birds. (The group’s conservation director, Bob Sallinger, says Audubon is donating much of the work on the six-year project, and the contract is “about two-tenths of one percent of our annual budget.”) “Two members of the Water Bureau and Bureau of Environmental Services budget advisory committees have jobs tied to those budgets,” Craford says. “It’s just this disgusting fox-watching-the-henhouse deal.”

The measure’s critics say: This measure is a corporate takeover of Bull Run and the city’s water system.


he money behind the ballot measure is indeed coming from big companies that are among the city’s biggest water users: Siltronic has given a total of $80,000. Portland Bottling Co., which packages soda pop, has contributed $50,000. In all, the campaign has raised $211,160, most of it from commercial ratepayers. (The measure’s opponents have also attracted big contributors: Longtime public-utility foe Portland General Electric has donated $10,000, while the labor union American Federation of State, County and Municipal Employees, which represents city workers, has given $30,000. The “no” campaign has raised a total of $145,790.) Opponents argue that the same corporations that created this measure will stack the new water district’s board with their puppets.

Sallinger this month appeared before the Buckman Neighborhood Association, and challenged members to recall who’s serving on similarly elected boards. “How many of you can name the members of your soil and water conservation district?” Sallinger asked. “These things are very esoteric. People don’t track them. “Anybody who thinks these interests are spending this kind of money to pass this initiative and then are just going to disappear is kidding themselves.”

The measure’s backers say: This measure has broad support, and not just from business.


hen Fish and his allies talk about this measure as a corporate coup, they’re conveniently overlooking some of its most ardent supporters—people to their left. The money is coming from big business, but the grassroots support is also coming from neighborhood groups, greenies who passionately defend the city’s open reservoirs. Craford’s co-petitioner, Floy Jones, is co-founder of Friends of the Reservoirs. She’s battled City Hall since 2002 to keep Mount Tabor’s reservoirs from complying with federal mandates to go underground. Portland City Hall fought the mandate in court—and lost in 2009. “We got creamed,” Shaff says. The City Council declared last summer it will no longer fight federal requirements and is now replacing the Tabor reservoirs with underground tanks at Powell and Kelly buttes. This $279 million project, in the middle of construction, is the single biggest contributor to rising water bills. Opponents say the project is a waste of money, won’t make Portlanders’ water safer, and will only put millions in the pockets of private contractors. The science on the benefits and harms of underground reservoirs is extremely contentious.

BUBBLICIOUS: This week’s cover parodies the logos designed in the early 1980s, when thenMayor Frank Ivancie tried to sell bottled, carbonated city water. Ivancie marketed the product as “Bull Run: Portland’s Sparkling Water,” and hawked it at the 1984 New Orleans World’s Fair. But he lost re-election before selling any bottles.

CONT. on page 20 Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014




DAM IT ALL: Embattled Water Bureau director David Shaff looks out over the dam at Bull Run Reservoir 1—a 180-foot-tall concrete structure designed in 1927 by the same engineer who later built the Hoover Dam.

WATER WORKINGS If voters approve the formation of a water district, how would the new public utility work? In short, all the holdings of the Water and Environmental Services bureaus would be moved by Jan. 1, 2015, from the City Council to a seven-member elected board, which could decide how to run them. That includes all the city’s property, decision-making power and contracts connected to the bureaus. It also means the new district would have the power to negotiate a new bargaining agreement with the bureaus’ unionized workers. The board would look like a miniature City Council, except for one big difference: The members would be elected from seven geographical zones, much like the Portland Public Schools Board. (The measure’s language explicitly uses the School Board’s zones as a model—leading to an ongoing dispute whether East Portland would be represented, since it sits in other school districts.) If the measure passes May 20, the City Council will have less than two months to draw the zones. Elections for all seven seats would be held in November. Like a couple getting a divorce, the City Council and the water district would have to split up stuff. An April 3 memo from the City Attorney’s Office says that process could take years. “Opponents say that the measure will invariably be challenged in court,” co-petitioner Kent Craford says. “Anything worth doing will end up in court.” AARON MESH. 20

Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014

Suffice it to say, if you thought a discussion of fluoride was a good way to end a dinner party, try reservoir burial. Most local environmental groups oppose the measure. They say the idea is too likely to force spending cuts of the city’s stormwater programs like green streets and the Portland Harbor Superfund cleanup. But the interests of people who want open reservoirs and those who want lower rates have found common cause. There’s no language in the ballot measure that would require keeping reservoirs open. Jones says that doesn’t matter—like the business donors, she’s trusting the new board to be the enemy of her enemy, and to halt a construction project that has already spent more than $100 million and finished its largest tank. “It’s those of us trying to protect our system as it is in its perfection,” Jones says, “against those who want to overengineer it.”

The measure’s critics say: The hidden costs of this measure will cripple Portland’s finances.


he water and sewer bills Portlanders pay do more than cover the cost of city utilities. Every year, Portland’s Water and Environmental Services bureaus pay millions of dollars into the city’s budget for legal advice, mechanical repairs of bureau vans, payroll costs and other shared overhead. Taking those bureaus out from under city government could cost the city’s budget $43 million a year. The measure would forbid the new water district from using city attorneys. And Portland’s independently elected watchdog, the city auditor, would need the new board’s permission to investigate how well—or poorly—the water district was operating. The measure’s backers say severing ties, both legal and financial, with City Hall would help bring about change in

water and sewer rates. “They will not have the perverse incentive to raise rates so that we can skim 5 percent off the top for the other bureaus,” Craford says. “Nick Fish has got four other commissioners who have incentive to see water rates rise.”

The measure’s backers say: A board dedicated to one task could do the job better.


look at other cities suggests public water districts sometimes work just fine. There’s the Eugene Water & Electric Board, for example, a 103-year-old public utility that has a reputation for efficiency. But for a cautionary tale, look no further than Clackamas County. The Clackamas River Water District is divided by infighting and accusations of mismanagement. Over a decade, it’s been the subject of six special audits and an FBI inquiry, The Oregonian reported in 2012. Last year, two members of the board turned a public meeting into a six-hour attempt to overthrow the district. If that sounds like amateur hour, the Portland measure’s critics point out that its language would prevent anyone with any expertise from serving on the board. It bans contractors from sitting on the board, but also says anyone who has worked for the city, had a contract with the city, or served on a utility budget committee has to wait six years before running. That conflict-of-interest clause includes people working for places like Fred Meyer and Home Depot. And since the city charter bars anyone holding elected office from holding another job, it could leave the district to be run by retirees, or those who are independently wealthy. (Craford and Jones say that clause doesn’t apply to the new board.) “It is possible that progressives could get elected to it,” says Seth Woolley, a Green Party activist. “I was thinking of running



THE WATER UNDERGROUND: Kent Craford (bottom left) and Floy Jones (bottom right) have been fighting City Hall since 2002 to keep the city’s open-air reservoirs, like the ones on Mount Tabor (above).

for it, if it passed. And that section gives me pause—because I have a regular job.”

The measure’s backers say: This measure would lower your water rates. The measure’s critics say: This measure would increase your water rates.


hat will probably decide the fate of a historic change in the control of Portland’s water is this simple, self-interested question: How will your bill look? One thing is clear: Proponents who complain so much about rates are not guaranteeing rates will decline. The truth is, that depends on who controls the new board. The new utility could cut costs any number of ways. It could rein in spending or reject its ties to larger Portland government. It could closely examine contracting or refuse to continue performing maintenance. Or, it could lower rates for big commercial users while raising them for everyone else. And that’s why Lloyd Anderson, the former city commissioner who once sued the city for its illegal spending of ratepayer dollars, has become an unexpected ally of the status quo. “Who controls the board through the election process is obscure,” Anderson wrote last year. “This effort to create a special taxing district is going in the wrong direction.” At least one observer sees the battle and wishes ill to both sides. Woolley says the fight over Bull Run is a battle for political power—not in the best interest of the people or their water. “It’s a tug of war between special interests,” Woolley says. “On the one side are the large water users and Willamette River polluters. And on the other side are engineering fi rms, development fi rms and city contractors. They both should stop corrupting our politics with big money.”


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DISH: Two brunch joints expand into dinner. MUSIC: Peter Buck’s first interview with Portland media. BOOKS: Hey, another Nirvana book! MOVIES: A 1914 film tribute to Portland progressivism.


pool (no water) by Mark Ravenhill Directed by Samantha Van Der Merwe

SCOOP FREE TILLY THE MURDERFISH. PAINT IT RED: A 130-foot mural on a temporary construction fence in the Pearl District was interrupted by a commercial break April 19. A cloth banner advertising WhiskeyFestNW was placed over the mural, painted by street artist Klutch, at Northwest 10th Avenue and Northrup Street. Klutch retaliated by covering his own artwork in red paint. “WhiskeyFest destroyed this mural with their mania for NASCAR overbranding,” read the mural April 20. “Who puts a billboard over a mural? Money ruins everything good in this W W S TA F F


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world.” WhiskeyFestNW had an advertising agreement with the landlord before Klutch’s temporary mural was started. Festival spokeswoman Erika Watson tells WW they worked to avoid damaging Klutch’s mural, which was to be on display during the event. “We in no way meant to disrespect the artist,” Watson says. “We spoke to him a week before that, and he said that he knew about it.” FATHER KNOWS BEST: Old-school, always-open dive My Father’s Place on Southeast Grand Avenue was filmed for a Portland episode of Esquire TV’s Best Bars in America. Esquire filmed an interview at the bar with Decemberist multi-instrumentalist Chris Funk, who chose the bar because it reminded him of his early days in Portland, when the place was full of musicians on the make. “Parts of this culture are starting to feel a bit Disney in some ways, drinks being served by young men with twisted mustaches featuring infused cubes,” Funk writes to WW. “I love that Portland takes pride in its service and craft industries. However, it’s nice to go to a bar that still serves cheap, stiff drinks and shoots pinball. Also they serve crinkle fries right out of the freezer bag, a classic!” 4TH STREET HEARTBREAK: Gresham’s flagship brewery is expected to close at the end of April. 4th Street Brewing, best known for its Gresham Light, looks to become a familystyle, family-owned Mexican restaurant and sports bar called Mojave Grill. According to Mojave co-owner Beatriz Cantu, the restaurant plans to project Timbers and Blazers games and mixed martial arts fights on a massive screen in the airy warehouse space. >> Also closing, at least temporarily, is Portland fine-dining institution Genoa, long an incubator for chefs who start other restaurants, from Bunk’s Tommy Habetz to Navarre and Luce’s John Taboada. According to a press release, the restaurant will close for an “extended hiatus” May 11 and will be “evaluating different paths forward for the restaurant.” Accanto, next door to Genoa on Southeast Belmont Street, will remain open and honor Genoa gift certificates. CLARIFICATION: The new Tilikum Crossing bridge is not named after a whale. Whales are not fish. Fish do not murder, nor do whales. We would like to thank the impassioned commenters on our blog post about the naming of the new Tilikum Crossing bridge for pointing these things out.


Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014

HEADOUT On the eve of Portland Fashion Week, we celebrate Normcore making Portland the center of the fashion universe.


ot so long ago, Portland was a J.C. Penney in the grand plaza of high fashion, a place where mustachioed lumberjacks and yoga moms were the most stylish people in town. The city’s tiny cabal of fashionistas despaired about the general schlubbiness of those around them. Then came Normcore. Now, we’re the J.C. Penney in the grand plaza of high fashion. Overnight, Portland became the planet’s best-dressed city, leaving Milan, Paris and Tokyo in the dust. The aftershocks are still rumbling through the world’s top design houses as labels like Marc Jacobs put fleececlad models onto runways. But Portlanders who know anything about anything didn’t blink. We’ve always known we’re each “one in 7 billion,” to borrow the unofficial tagline of the Normcore movement. Normcore gained official notice in late February, when New York magazine realized that the prettiest people under 30 were wearing comfortable, loose-fitting jeans, socks with Birkenstocks, puffy jackets, Tevas, offbrand sneakers, clogs and polar fleece. “Normcore isn’t about rebelling against or giving into the status quo; it’s about letting go of the need to look distinctive, to make time for something new,” the magazine averred. Since that story, Normcore has appeared on any blog that’s any blog, and in the pages of any fashion mag that’s any fashion mag. “Normcore is about dressing like a mildmannered mental patient or a bewildered Icelandic exchange student circa 1984,” wrote fashion commentator Simon Doonan on Slate. “Normcore was a long time coming. Normcore is for real.” Le duh, Mr. Doonan. Nowhere is Normcore realer than in Portland, where we’ve been wearing the style since shortly after the city’s incorporation. With all due respect to Steve Jobs, the good people of Des Moines and the fashion icons of Seinfeld, any expert that’s any expert agrees that Portland has long been the normest of cores.

Our colors are generally muted—think tan, brown, tan, slate blue, gray, tan, black, beige, tan and denim. W hile some oh-so-sad ly out-of-touch Portlanders still insist on wearing such things as “dresses,” “heels” and “ties,” it’s inarguable that Normies are the pace of this city. Seeing Normcore in action is as simple as walking by any of Portland’s h ig h-f a sh ion bu s st ops, or strolling the couturec r a m me d a i sle s of F r e d Meyer on a Sunday night. At the center of the Normcore scene, you’ll find Willamette Week’s staff. Known to favor zip-up hoodies, stonewashed jeans and seasonally appropriate outdoor gear made by high-quality manufacturers with discreet logos (think Marmot, Patagonia and vintage Mountain Hardwear), the newspaper’s writers shake their heads at those who mistake flamboyance for fashion sense. Will you find us at Portland Fashion Week? Maybe. But we’re more likely to be on Northeast Sandy Boulevard, watching the real runway in action. Come find us: We’ll be the ones looking like everyone else. REBECCA JACOBSON. GET THE LOOK: Jacket:: White Sierra, hand-me-down Shirt:: Big Dogs, $10 Jeans:: Levi’s 513, thrifted Socks:: Nike, J.C. Penney, $3 Shoes:: Reebok men’s classic sneaker,, $37

C H R I S R YA N P H O T O . C O M

The Fleecing of America



WEDNESDAY APRIL 23 NORM MACDONALD [COMEDY] Back in the ’90s, Norm MacDonald turned the Saturday Night Live news desk into his own absurdist playground, brilliantly mocking not so much the news as Weekend Update itself. His standup remains clever and profane. Helium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th Ave., 888643-8669. 8 pm. $30-$37. 21+.

THURSDAY APRIL 24 SILENT FILMS FROM THE OREGON HISTORICAL SOCIETY [FILM] In an attempt to combat juvenile delinquency, old-time Portlanders elected a series of boy mayors. One was called down to Hollywood to star in a film. That 1914 movie will be shown with live piano accompaniment. Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy Blvd., 2814215. 7 pm. $8. STUMPFEST [MUSIC] Crouched in the crevasse where metal and psych meet, this annual three-day festival is a celebration of music as mind-altering substance. Headliners include krautrock party animals Trans Am, Portland pop-metal heavies Red Fang and veteran Oregon sludge beasts YOB. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3895. 8:30 pm. $15 advance, $17 day of show. Through April 26.

FRIDAY APRIL 25 SHLOHMO [MUSIC] Last year’s Laid Out is a Flying Lotus-style record that’s mostly instrumental, hazy production backed with clipped, electronic drums. The pending release of an EP, with Chicago R&B crooner Jeremih, is likely to alienate some beat-junkie types, but it’s all in the name of his evolution. Branx, 320 SE 2nd Ave., 234-5683. 9 pm. $15. 21+.

SATURDAY APRIL 26 BLEEDING RAINBOW [MUSIC] No offense to the noisy, Philly guitar-pop act, which is a perfectly fine Sonic Youth homage, but the recommendation here is less for the music than the locale. Who knows why Sloan’s—the Boise-Eliot bar with the semi truck sticking out of its side—is hosting this show, but it’s cool to see an indie buzz band play a dive whose décor hasn’t changed since the Carter administration. Sloan’s Tavern, 36 N Russell St., 287-2262. 9 pm. $5. 21+.

SUNDAY APRIL 27 EAT MOBILE FESTIVAL [FOOD] This is the street version of a small-plates menu. Willamette Week’s annual food-cart festival at OMSI features samples from more than 30 carts included with each ticket. Tickets at OMSI parking lot, 1945 SE Water Ave, 2:30-6 pm. $30.

GO: Portland Fashion Week is at Memorial Coliseum, 300 N Winning Way, Runway shows FridaySunday, April 25-27. $30-$100. Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014



= WW Pick. Highly recommended. By MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Editor: MARTIN CIZMAR. Email: See page 3 for submission instructions.

THURSDAY, APRIL 24 Blind-Tasting Bingo

Eat weird things! Play Bingo! It’s the perfect way to feel like an old lady and a pregnant lady at the same time. You taste 12 items prepped by Bon Appetit chef Ryan Morgan with a blindfold on, then try to match them up on a goofy bingo board. Winners get beer. Losers still get food. OMSI, 1945 SE Water Ave., 797-4000. 6 pm. $25.

FRIDAY, APRIL 25 Oregon Garden Brewfest

Inside the idyllic 80-acre Oregon Garden in Silverton—which patrons are free to wander—65 breweries will offer 130 beers, ciders and meads. Standouts include Boring’s Hot Scotch pepper beer and Fort George’s fruity Divinity, but the massive fest includes many lesserknown breweries around the state such as Plank Town, Rusty Truck and Vagabond. Oregon Garden, 879 W Main St., Silverton, 874-8100, Noon-11 pm Friday and Saturday, April 25-26. Noon-5 pm Sunday, April 27. $15-$50.

SATURDAY, APRIL 26 Best of Dundee Hills

Does a sober friend owe you a huge favor? Like, a huge favor? Like, they’re your spouse or grown child or something? Because for a cool $40, you get access to tastings and food pairings at 26 Dundee Hills wineries, which means you will be blotto and stuffed and groggy and kind of weird if you do it right. Multiple venues, 10 am Saturday-6 pm Sunday, April 26-27. $40.

SUNDAY, APRIL 27 Eat Mobile

This is the street version of a smallplates menu. WW’s annual foodcart festival, with samples from over 30 of our favorite carts—from hot Belizean to So Cold ice cream— included with each ticket, plus beer sold onsite. OMSI parking lot, 1945 SE Water Ave., 2:30-6 pm. $30.

Vegan Wine Pairings

For not overly much money, Pairings wine shop is again pairing up with one of its neighbors in the Ocean food barn for a multicourse wine pairing. This one’s easier to swallow than the tacos, though: The Sudra vegan spot will be serving up five courses, including coconut fried rice, poori and pralines—and Pairings will match those with fine wines. Pairings Portland Wine Shop, 455 NE 24th Ave., 541-531-7653. 5 pm. $30 advance, $35 day of event.

TUESDAY, APRIL 29 Taste of the Nation

In a long tradition of complete decadence in the name of charity, and meals that fight the hunger of people not currently eating the meal, Share Our Strength’s Taste of the Nation will roll out for its 27th year. A ridiculous array of luxe restaurants are serving up vittles, including a good spicy crawfish dish from Boke Bowl. VIPs get extra bits that include latkes from Vitaly Paley and rillettes from the not-evenopen-yet Renata. Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St., 225-0047. 6:30 pm, 5:30 pm VIP. $85, $150 VIP.


Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014

GREEN MACHINE: Chiboust a la Frice.

FRICE PASTRY/PHILIPPE’S BREAD Ask Kurt Huffman how much his restaurant empire ChefStable used to spend on bread, and he’ll answer quickly: “A lot.” Bread markups are notoriously high, and for restaurateurs with a stake in as many spots as Huffman—Ox, Ración, St. Jack, Grüner, Lardo—developing your own baking operation makes sense. Duane “Stumptown” Sorenson has shown it works with Roman Candle bakery, which ferries bread and pastries to Ava Gene’s, the Woodsman Tavern and Market, and his local coffeehouses. And now Huffman has Frice Pastry and Philippe’s Order this: Olive baguette with herbs, Bread. Sharing a North matcha-and-yuzu chiboust, croissant. Williams Avenue storefront Best deal: Madeleines ($4 for a dozen). with the just-opened third outpost of Lardo, the operation has a small seating area, lined with vases of freshly cut tulips, and a massive kitchen. Peek past the loaves stacked on utilitarian wire shelves and you’ll see bakers scooping butter from vats beside a machine that looks like R2-D2. That’s a $25,000 fermentolevain, which keeps liquid sourdough starter at its ideal temperature. The natural yeast gives a nice tang to Lyonnaise native Philippe Garcia’s bread: chewy ciabatta; flaky baguettes, some with sesame seeds or olives; walnut-studded campagne loaves. Sweets are an even better reason to visit. They’re prepared by Alissa Frice (nee Rozos), former pastry chef at St. Jack, and displayed like precious gems in long glass cases. In addition to her familiar madeleines ($4 for a dozen, baked to order) and a refined lineup of brioche, scones and croissants, Frice has an array of kaleidoscopically hued tarts and mousses, each $5. The banana cream tart is a fresh and classy version of the perennial summer-camp dessert, and a milk chocolate bombe with apricot puree is decadent but not overwhelming. My favorite, though, was a little cake Frice calls a chiboust. Cut just larger than a Jenga block, it layered springy green tea custard and a band of lemony yuzu gelee, with chocolate threads zigzagging across the top. It was light and faintly sweet and a little grassy, like the first whiff of summer. REBECCA JACOBSON. EAT: Frice Pastry and Philippe’s Bread, 4082 N Williams Ave., 971-266-8348. 7 am-7 pm daily.


NINA’S LAGER (OLD TOWN BREWING) Nina is the name of the supposed ghost haunting the back corner of Old Town Pizza. Legend has it, she was a prostitute tossed down an elevator shaft for snitching on the Merchant Hotel’s pimps. Forty years ago, Nina got lots of new potential hauntees when Old Town Pizza started tossing its fresh and bready dough near where she had been hooking. She’s spotlighted anew thanks to Nina’s Lager, a pale, malty German brew modeled on the pre-Prohibition suds the Merchant’s guests and johns may well have drunk. The brew came from Old Town’s newer Northeast Portland location, where brewmaster Bolt Minister has established himself as one of the city’s winningest dark horses with a gold medal at the Great American Beer Festival. It’s a highly quaffable brew, with a clean, sweet malt profile that lingers in an unobtrusive way, more like a gentle reminder of the past than a haunting. MARTIN CIZMAR.


C H R I S R YA N P H O T O . C O M


mcizmar@wweek .com

Brunch is usually a bad omen. When restaurants known for dinner start offering up omelets, scrambles, frittatas, stratas or quiches, it means either they’re succeeding beyond capacity or they’re trying to scrape up whatever cash they can with high-margin flapjacks. I’m not sure what it means, but, lately, several famous Portland bruncheries have flipped the script. The new Broder Nord started serving dinner about a month ago, with downtown’s Bijou Cafe following last week. Now, two breakfast nooks whose names betray ties to the dewy afterdawn—Mississippi Avenue’s Gravy and Woodstock’s Toast—are doing their own dinner menus. We stopped by both restaurants for dinner last week, ordering a fi sh special and a chicken-with-pork entree. The restaurants are similar at breakfast, but they’re doing dinner quite differently, with Gravy serving fancified Betty Crocker fare, as Toast pops into territory that’s novel for its neighborhood. Gravy 3957 N Mississippi Ave., 287-8800, Dinner served Monday-Friday. Gravy is surrounded by bars and eateries on bustling North Mississippi Avenue. On weekends, the brunch line often starts at 8:30 am for biscuits sopped in the namesake and a bruleed bowl of oatmeal, which some people are of the opinion is among the best in town. Gravy has been serving dinner since early February, but the locals haven’t caught on yet. On a Tuesday night, staff outnumbered patrons. There’s a little sign that says to wait to be seated, but the waiter beckons from the back with a wave. The menu is short and very traditional, including platters of meatloaf, roast turkey and a big ol’ pork chop. On my visit, the night’s market-priced fish dish was four planks of batter-fried halibut ($14.50) with a pile of fries, a small cereal bowl of mild tartar sauce and a bigger cereal bowl of green beans swimming in brown gravy with a few fried onions on top. The fish was cooked in a barelythere, firm but crunchless batter with the texture of an




unglazed Krispy Kreme. There was no lemon, and they didn’t have any malt vinegar on premises, but the waiter brought over a bottle of white vinegar to cut the tartar. The fries fared so well in housemade ketchup—sweet with a nice herbal character thanks to a healthy dose of clove— that I briefly considered dunking the halibut. Far better was the chicken cordon gravy ($14.50), a small, moist chicken breast topped with a tall pile of shaved ham and soaked in a mild cheese sauce. It was served with two sides, a little bowl of pleasantly bitter braised greens and a heap of savory bread stuffing gooey from mixed-in turkey gravy.

staffers, one other couple and a Dead bootleg. Toast’s version of dinner is higher end than Gravy’s, offering a surprisingly large selection of wine by the glass, plus a full cocktail menu. There’s even an amuse-bouche offered—a bite of pepper-leek frittata, presumably a breakfast survivor. Toast’s fish special was a hunk of pan-seared rockfish ($21.50) with capers in a little brown butter sauce over roasted cauliflower and asparagus. A sweet, silky puree of carrots that could have doubled as dessert came in a separate bowl after the kitchen forgot to plate it. The fish was flaky and moist, while the pan-fried vegetables were crispy and well-seasoned. A moist chicken leg and thigh wrapped in crispy bacon ($17.50) and served with finely shredded and lightly fermented yellow cabbage and a big pile of crusty green spaetzle made of broccoli raab and spinach was also impressive. Not as good were a chalky white bean “hummus” ($6.50) served with overly buttery Texas toast, and a quinoa and beet plate ($10.50) with pickled red onions and toasted hazelnuts that ended up a messy amalgamation of rough and disparate flavors. Still, I think Toast is on to something—dinner, here, is a good sign.

Toast 5222 SE 52nd Ave., 774-1020, Dinner served Wednesday-Friday. Toast sits next to a bodega and an insurance office on Southeast 52nd Avenue. It’s already one of the best restaurants in its blue-collar neighborhood—I know loyal customers who drive from Laurelhurst and Buckman— and has put together a surprisingly ambitious dinner program that includes six starters and six entrees. On a Wednesday night, we shared the place with four


Now pouring our own beer and selling burgers at all 3 locations. Pizza, full-bar, brewery and heated patio at our Fremont location.

Portland’s Best Wings!


1708 E. Burnside 503.230.WING (9464)

Restaurant & Brewery NE 57th at Fremont 503-894-8973

4225 N. Interstate Ave. 503.280.WING (9464)

Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014



Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014





C O U R T E S Y O F WA R N E R B R O S .

Peter Buck doesn’t need me. Thirty years amassing one of the most sanctified discographies in American music—and a bank account festooned with zeroes—has ensured him of that. R.E.M., the immeasurably influential band whose sound his glistening arpeggios defined, broke up in 2011, and as far as the 57-yearold guitarist was concerned, he didn’t need to speak with another journalist ever again. By his count, he’s given only three interviews in the last three years, and none to media in Portland, where he got married last year and is a part-time resident. It’s not like he doesn’t have anything to talk about. He’s still in bands, including the country-leaning Tired Pony and Robert Fripp’s ambient Slow Music project, and he’s released two solo albums on local label Mississippi Records. Compared to the massive rock-’n’-roll machine that formerly employed him, though, those projects are the model airplanes of his rock-star retirement—hobbies to keep himself occupied between trips to Kauai and Todos Santos, Mexico. He doesn’t need to promote them. If they find an audience, great. If not, well, those zeroes aren’t going anywhere. And so, when I sit down with Buck and his de facto consigliere, Scott McCaughey of the Minus 5, on the front porch of Liberty Glass off North Mississippi Avenue, my first question is obvious.

say to anybody in any real way. But I’m doing a couple shows locally, and this is one of the places I consider home. Scott McCaughey: You also did great in putting out your records on possibly the only record label that does no promotion at all. Buck: I really like Mississippi Records. I probably owned 40 of their records before. I went to Eric [Isaacson, the label’s owner] and said, “I’m making a record; I’m wondering if you want to put it out.” He goes, “What do you think about promotion?” “I don’t want any.” “What do you think about CDs or downloads?” “I don’t want any of that.” “Promo copies?” “No.” He goes, “Well, I can do all that.” Eric didn’t try to push you to do more promo for the records, because it might’ve helped the label financially? Buck: Eric’s pretty laissez faire about that stuff, which is one of the reasons I like them. Every label, including when I work with Yep Roc or Merge, you start getting phone calls: “Can you do an interview with Joe Blow from The Dickville Daily Ball?” As a matter of fact, I don’t think I can. Did you have a perception of what life was going to be like after R.E.M.? Buck: I thought my options were to put together a band with semi-famous people and be, like, the Asia of alternative rock. That didn’t really strike me. Or you can get a band with a bunch of 22-year-olds and

Peter Buck (second from right) and the original R.E.M. lineup.

“WE PLAYED 90 MINUTES, AND EVERY SONG WAS A TOP-10 SINGLE. WE WALKED OFF AND WENT, ‘SEE YA, BOYS! ENJOY PLAYING THAT UNRELEASED NEW RECORD OF YOURS!’” —PETER BUCK, ON R.E.M. OPENING FOR THE VERVE WW: So why are you talking to me? Peter Buck: When R.E.M. ended, at one point I was telling Scott and my wife, “That’s it, I’m done. I’m finished. I’m never doing this again.” I thought I was never going to play in public again. I have nothing to say as a songwriter; I don’t want to sing. So I immediately wrote 10 songs and started singing them. But what I wanted to do was write and play and perform and work with people I respect. Everything else, whether it’s the red carpet or getting my picture taken, I didn’t really want to do. I don’t feel like I have anything to

tour for 10 months a year. That didn’t really strike me. Go to Nashville and write songs for people whose records I wouldn’t listen to? Eh. I thought, I’ll do these solo records. They’re meant to be a complete expression of a portion of who I am. I just wanted to do something recorded completely the way I wanted to, which is super fast. We spent two and a half days on the first record and five days on the second. You never envisioned playing in R.E.M. until you were the Rolling Stones’ age?

Buck: We always said from the very beginning that when it starts to get like a job, we’re not going to do it anymore. It didn’t become a job, but it felt like it was going to get there. We didn’t really have the audience we used to have. We’d finished our record deal. And I started feeling a little stupid being a 50-year-old playing festivals with guys literally half our age—even though we smoked most of them, to tell you the truth. We opened for the Verve, and we left those guys with their tail between their legs. Michael [Stipe]’s like, “This sucks.” I said, “Well, if you want to make them look bad, let’s just do all of our hit singles. We’ve never done that before.” So we played 90 minutes, and every song was a top-10 single somewhere. We walked off and went, “See ya, boys! Enjoy playing that unreleased new record of yours.” Nice guys, too. When I heard “R.E.M. is breaking up,” I thought, “They’ll come back in a few years.” Why should I not feel that way? Buck: I can’t say we’re never going to play together again. But I was hanging out with Michael and Mike [Mills, R.E.M.’s bassist], and we were laughing because everyone goes, “Someone will give you $10 million to tour Europe one summer and you’ll go.” I can’t really imagine. We’re in different places in our lives. You know, never say never, but every year that goes by, we don’t talk about it. We did the right thing at the right time. We would’ve been an oldies band, and I didn’t want to keep going out there and reminding everyone how great we used to be. I’m great right now. Thing is, it’s a different kind of greatness. Footage leaked of your wedding reception at Wonder Ballroom, with you guys all getting up and playing songs together, and you were really careful to not have all four R.E.M. members onstage at the same time. Was that a conscious decision? Buck: I didn’t care about it. I think Michael was conscious of it. Bill [Berry, R.E.M.’s original drummer] wanted all four of us to play, and it was like, Bill, we don’t want to have to every day answer the question,

“Oh, you’re back together?” In a way, we never broke up. We have a corporation, we own property, we own the masters to most of our records, we have band meetings, we hang out together. Mike plays in at least two of the bands I’m in. It’s just that we chose not to pursue a career as the four of us. Can you remember the first time you came to Portland? Buck: Yeah, 1984. We played at Starry Night [now the Roseland]. I have a strong memory that there was something really smelly about the dressing room. We sat in the parking lot, and there was broken glass everywhere, and drank really warm beer outside of our really smelly van before the show. So I had connections here. Now I’m married, so I’m here a lot. I’m paying taxes here this year. But I’m not even here half the year. So I’m kind of a local guy, in as much as I’m local in Athens and Todos Santos in Mexico and Seattle. There’s like 20, 30 places where I go. But the places where I play music are going to be closer to my heart than, like, Hawaii, where I go to sit on the beach and drink beer. Do you have anonymity here? Buck: Pretty much anywhere. If I go to a rock show, people will talk to me, but I spent the whole day walking around this neighborhood and no one said a word to me. My picture wasn’t on the cover of the records, and they’re not on the cover of my own records. I try not to be in the videos, I never did talk shows, I didn’t go to parties. It’s a really comfortable level. I get respect from people who know what I’ve done, but it’s not overwhelming. I can ride the bus. I went to see the Breeders [at Wonder Ballroom] with Mike Mills when he was in town last, and we couldn’t get a cab, so I hitchhiked home. I bumped into the guy who picked us up not too long ago and he goes, “You totally inspired me, I started a gypsy cab company!” McCaughey: Still inspiring people! SEE IT: Peter Buck plays the Secret Society, 116 NE Russell St., with SuperEarth, on Tuesday and Wednesday, April 29-30. 8 pm. $5. 21+. Read an extended interview with Peter Buck at Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014



Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014

april 23-29


= WW Pick. Highly recommended. Prices listed are sometimes for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and so-called convenience charges may apply. Event lineups are subject to change after WW’s press deadlines. Editor: MATTHEW SINGER. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, go to and follow submission directions. All shows should be submitted two weeks or more in advance of event. Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: Fax: 243-1115.

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 23 Sleeper Agent, Holychild, Pagiins

[SWEET AND ANONYMOUS] Playing candied pop rock with a vague punk edge, Sleeper Agent is from Bowling Green, Ky., the same unlikely city that produced eclectic nostalgia repackagers Cage the Elephant, and seems similarly destined to become one of those acts that’s way bigger than anyone who doesn’t listen to alt-rock radio realizes. Meet your 15-year-old cousin from the Midwest’s favorite new band. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., 231-9663. 7:45 pm. $12. 21+.

The Resistance, Cataldo, Serge Severe, St. Even

[BOUNDARY BREAKERS] For too long, local promoters and talent managers have shied away from booking local hip-hop alongside other genres. The time to change is now. The recent crackdown on hip-hop bills at the Blue Monk and Kelly’s Olympian by Portland police only make it more important for people to experience the amazing talent we have in this city. So here we go—trailblazing young St. Johns crew the Resistance is joined by the gritty rhymes of Serge Severe, the spry folk pop of Seattle’s Cataldo, and St. Even, PDX’s king of sadbastard jams. Tonight’s show is curated by Party Damage Records (full disclosure: former WW music editor Casey Jarman is the label’s co-owner), and is billed as an “evening of genre-agnostic music”, but it’s also an opportunity to facilitate conversation, build commu-

nity and partake in an incredible night of Northwest music. MICHAEL MANNHEIMER. Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison St., 239-7639. 8 pm. $10 advance party pack, $6 day of show. 21+.

Jillionaire, BennyRox, Party Girl, Lil Clark

[DIGITAL SOCA] Trinidadian producer Jillionaire is a member of the Diplo-led big-room EDM crew Major Lazer, but his solo efforts tend to outclass that crew’s aggressive radio groping. He fuses house and soca, a Caribbean-Indian fusion style with a driving beat that makes dancehall sound like the Postal Service. On “Fresh,” his just-released collaboration with electro-house producer Salvatore Ganacci and Balkan dancehall artist Sanjin, each style gets its space. Late in the track, when the pumped-up soca beat drops, the energy level gets cranked to that of a Trinidadian night in late May. MITCH LILLIE. The Whiskey Bar, 31 NW 1st Ave., 227-0405. 10 pm. $9. 21+.

THURSDAY, APRIL 24 Simon Townshend

[SINGER-SONGWRITER] In press materials for his new album, Denial, the eighth in a now three-decade career of his own, Pete’s kid brother (and, since 1996, Who bandmate), Simon Townshend, alludes to recording while “being clean.” The language of recovery and selfhelp definitely enters into songs like the title tune, “Heal” and “Mother,” but while the younger Townshend’s lyrics can be confessional, they



FIVE MACAULAY CULKIN-THEMED PIZZA RECIPES You may remember Macaulay Culkin as the precocious child actor who sadistically tortured Joe Pesci and Daniel Stern in the Home Alone movies. Well, he’s all grown up, and playing in a pizza-obsessed Velvet Underground tribute act called the Pizza Underground. So, in advance of the band’s Portland show, we asked Lonesome’s Pizza owner Noah Antieau—the mind behind some of the best (and most absurdly named) pies in town—to whip up with some Mac-inspired pizza recipes. Do not make these at home, alone or otherwise. The Home Alone Pizza Arugula and new pubes. The “Black or White” Video Pizza Dandelion greens, bathroom-sink meat, guitar-roasted George Wendt. The Richie Rich Pizza (Isn’t he a drug addict in real life?), pepperoni (I feel like he’s been caught with pills or something), half a chicken (the shit you do for drugs, am I right?), wilted kale. The Party Monster Pizza Manwich meat, free-range unicorn thigh. The Pizza Underground Pizza Prosciutto, African cucumber, gluten-free gluten, cheese of some sort, the girl who doesn’t call me anymore. SEE IT: The Pizza Underground plays Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., with Toby Goodshank, Wampire and Tiger House, on Tuesday, April 29. 9 pm. $12 advance, $15 day of show. 21+.

often fail to universalize the personal, or vice-versa. Townshend’s voice unmistakably shares his big brother’s peculiar sweet-and-sour, blunted-edge character, which can be simultaneously comforting and disconcerting. It requires repeated reminders that he’s not imitating an icon but simply playing the vocal chords he’s been dealt. While tonight’s solo show will lack the album’s standard-issue rock arrangements, fans of not only the Who but brainy Brits in general—say, XTC or Richard Thompson—might get something out of these songs. JEFF ROSENBERG. Alberta Rose Theatre, 3000 NE Alberta St., 719-6055. 8 pm. $20 advance, $25 day of show. Under 21 permitted with legal guardian.

Eyehategod, Stoneburner, Sioux, Dead by Dawn

[SLUDGE KINGS] This will be New Orleans doom merchant Eyehategod’s first stop in Portland since the passing of drummer Joey Lacaze. Though Lacaze’s mighty swing will be missed, young replacement Aaron Hall is getting rave reviews for filling his shoes. The band will issue a self-titled album next month—its first disc of all-new material in 14 years—the last musical statement of Lacaze on the drum throne. Eyehategod has weathered tragedy with renewed vigor, turning its sights back on the U.S. after several European trips. Main support is provided by local heavy heroes Stoneburner, whose brand new Neurot album, Life Drawing, dropped April 15. NATHAN CARSON. Branx, 320 SE 2nd Ave., 234-5683. 9 pm. $18. 21+.

Stumpfest: Trans Am, Federation X, Life Coach, Drab Majesty, Hot Victory

[COKE ROCK] Recent press photos of Trans Am say everything you need to know about the D.C. trio: The members’ coordinating whiteon-white getups and comically large mirrored sunglasses look the way cocaine feels. The group’s robotic mashup of funk and krautrock could loosely be categorized as postrock, but not in the modern pejorative sense. The opening night of the metal and heavy-psych festival Stumpfest finds Trans Am guitarist Phil Manley pulling double duty with Life Coach, where he trades the undulating synth kitsch for the hesher swagger of Thin Lizzy. Local stoner-metal heavies Red Fang and sludge beasts YOB headline the other two nights respectively. PETE COTTELL. Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., 288-3895. 8:30 pm. $15 advance, $17 day of show. 21+. Through April 26.

Drive-By Truckers, Shovels and Rope

[RAGGED ROCK] For a brief moment in 2011, with the release of the slightly lackluster Go-Go Boots, it seemed as though the Drive-By Truckers’ career was careening toward mediocrity. Frontmen Patterson Hood and Mike Cooley lost dear friends and band members, and both issued solo albums during the hiatus that followed. DBT’s latest LP, English Oceans, represents a return to form. It’s plastered with drawled political portraits and tales of alienated deadbeats, while still showcasing the same lean grit and Southern alt-rock sound with which the band has become synonymous over the past three decades. BRANDON WIDDER. Roseland Theater, 8 NW 6th Ave., 224-2038. 8 pm. $26. All ages.

CONT. on page 33 Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014


LIVE PERFORMANCE AGES & AGES FRIDAY APRIL 25TH @ 6 PM Ages and Ages is more than a band. It’s a collective of like-minded souls that believe in the power of music to change the world and elevate the spirit. Their music is bright and uplifting, with lyrics, penned by bandleader Tim Perry, that deliver serious introspective messages full of insight and consideration for others.

AUTOGRAPH SIGNING THE GLITCH MOB FRIDAY MAY 2ND @ 6:30 PM The Glitch Mob, was formed in 2006 within the burgeoning Los Angeles bass-driven ‘beat’ scene. The group made a name for themselves playing live, choosing to perform with laptops and MIDI controllers like the Lemur.[2][3] They won fans through showcasing their chosen technology during solo performances, and after gaining attention in Los Angeles and San Francisco, the group eventually toured more widely along the West Coast and then to various festivals worldwide.

LIVE PERFORMANCE GAYTHEIST SUNDAY MAY 4TH @ 5 PM Gaytheist is a trio of fellas from Portland, OR started in 2011 that shake, rattle and roll with vicious intensity and loud, catchy grooves. They’ve released a new album called “Live At The Banana Stand”, which was recorded during a Halloween Party in 2013 for about 100 beautifully costumed people. This latest release contains 13 songs, all live versions from their last four albums.

3158 E. Burnside / 503-231-8923 /


Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014


FRIDAY, APRIL 25 Shlohmo

[NU-HIP-HOP] L.A.-based producer Shlohmo and his Wedidit collective cohorts run parallel to Flying Lotus’ Brainfeeder crew. With last year’s Laid Out, Shlohmo reiterated his sonic proclivities, offering a mostly instrumental disc of hazy productions backed with clipped, electronic-sounding drums. The pending release of an EP with Chicago R&B crooner Jeremih—as well as the lead-off track from that earlier disc—is likely to alienate some beat-junkie types, but it’s all in the name of Shlohmo’s evolution. DAVE CANTOR. Branx, 320 SE 2nd Ave., 234-5683. 9 pm. $15. 21+.

Fernando, Michael Dean Damron, Sarah Gwen, Hearts of Oak

[PDX VIA PACOIMA] Fernando Viciconte is one of Portland’s true songwriting treasures, an artist who, over the course of his career, has proven adept at everything from downcast country ballads to barn-raising roots rock to ’50s garage pop. Live performances have become rarer in recent years, but he promises to debut new songs with his band tonight. Dante’s, 350 W Burnside St., 345-7892. 8 pm. $10. 21+.

The Grrrl Front Festival

[IT’S A RIOT] The second year of


this two-day summit of feminist music and comedy is headlined on the rock end of things by the proudly nerdy Doubleclicks and post-rock explorers Palo Verde. Proceeds benefit Bitch Media. See the full lineup at Tonic Lounge, 3100 NE Sandy Blvd., 238-0543. 8 pm. $8. 21+. Through April 26.

SATURDAY, APRIL 26 Jose James, Moonchild

[BEAT-BENDING JAZZ] Jose James’ genre-hopping sound has won the favor of ears from all factions of the music community. While his early recordings established his mastery of jazz, James’ 2013 release, No Beginning No End, indicated a shift towards hip-hop. This summer’s forthcoming album, While You Were Sleeping, shows further development in a soulful, electronic direction inspired by James Blake and Radiohead. GRACE STAINBACK. Alberta Rose Theatre, 3000 NE Alberta St., 7196055. 10 pm. $15 advance, $18 day of show. 21+.

Tokyo Police Club, Geographer

[ALT-ROCK] “How many types of people do you think there really are for me?” asks a forlorn David Monk in “Argentina,” the first track off Tokyo Police Club’s Forcefield.

CONT. on page 34



Federale, perhaps the only band in Portland playing original spaghetti Western soundtrack music, marks an unlikely 10th anniversary this week. Founding member Collin Hegna recalls the group’s inauspicious beginnings. “In 2004 we started Federale, mostly because our old band, Cocaine Unicorn, had broken up. Our drummer, Ryan Sumner, and I spent our days sitting around drinking bloody marys and watching The Good, the Bad and the Ugly. Somehow—probably thanks to the BMs—we hit upon the idea of starting a band that played music similar to Ennio Morricone’s famous score. We needed a band name: ‘What’s Spanish for “sheriff”?’ Check. ‘We’re gonna need a trumpet and a whistle.’ Check. ‘OK, now we need a sombrero.’ Check. Our first gig was at Kelly’s Olympian on Cinco de Mayo a few months later. It was pretty awful but people seemed to like it. This photo is of our second show at a Western-themed barbecue. Our compañeros, Spindrift, showed up from L.A., and we had a duel starting at dusk. There was a ‘barn bar’ with people doing trick lassoing. Almost everyone was dressed up Western style. We still weren’t very good, but damn it was fun. Ryan Sumner passed away in 2005. We decided to keep playing, though. The songs got better, the shows got better, the recordings got better. Now we have a song in The Lego Movie. But we never could improve on the sombrero.” SEE IT: Federale plays Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., with Daydream Machine, on Sunday, April 27. 9 pm. $8 advance, $10 day of show. 21+.

Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014




“Enough to fill a room? Enough to fill a mall?” The eight-minute saga sets the standard for the remainder of the album, and that standard happens to be confused, oversynthesized radio hopefuls. The buoyant pop-rock band took a four-year hiatus and, when it came back, took a detour from its previous hi-fi altrock sound. Regardless of whether you’re a fan of the new album, the band’s live set will undoubtedly teem with its past dance-floor fillers and Monk’s stringy vocals. ASHLEY JOCZ. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., 231-9663. 8 pm. $18. 21+.

Greg & Shanti/Play Date, Ty Vaughn

[PUNK IS FOR THE CHILDREN] The “Greg” in Greg and Shanti is Greg Attonito, the singer of great New Jersey punk vets Bouncing Souls. “Shanti” is Shanti Wintergate, a Canadian-born songwriter, actress and author. Together, the couple performs as Play Date, playing kiddie ditties about dancing monsters, the alphabet and being rad. After the all-ages matinee, the pair will play an acoustic show for the grizzled old boozers, which will hopefully feature renditions of Attonito’s more mature material, about ’80s movie quotes, girls who work in convenience stores and dating your mom. MATTHEW SINGER. Katie O’Brien’s, 2809 NE Sandy Blvd., 234-8573. 3 pm (Play Date) and 9 pm (Greg & Shanti). Call venue for ticket information. Early show all ages, late show 21+.

PHAME Choir with Laura Gibson

[LOCAL LOVEFEST] Portland songstress Laura Gibson has teamed up with PHAME, a nonprofit arts academy for adults with developmental disabilities, for this concert commemorating the organization’s 30th anniversary. Portland’s musical talent is manifested in all forms: There’s the soft-spoken folk of Gibson, and then there’s the PHAME Chorus belting out John Denver’s “Take Me Home, Country Road” and Coldplay’s “Yellow” with heartfelt zeal. In a program that will combine Gibson’s original compositions with some of the chorus’s longstanding favorites, the duality of talent will create a night celebrating the joy of musical expression. GRACE STAINBACK. Mission Theater and Pub, 1624 NW Glisan St., 223-4527. 7 pm. $22 advance, $30 day of show. Under 21 permitted with legal guardian.

Franz Ferdinand

[WHITE CRUNK MUSIC] Namechecked as inspiration by Kanye West (who supplied the genre tag) and shoehorned between Maroon 5 and the Black Eyed Peas as the opener of the 2005 Grammys, Franz Ferdinand strode the heights of mid-aughts ubiquity to an always somewhat mystifying degree that now feels a cosmic misprint. Even amid an age predisposed to a serrated angularity of guitar rock, the Scottish troupe’s bemused bounce and artful leanings never seemed poised to command a chunk of the new listening audience as the Strokes might’ve in those slim-trousered days, and successive releases seemed more a consequence of misplaced momentum than conscious efforts to maintain relevance. Fourth album Right Thoughts, Right Words, Right Action, Franz Ferdinand’s first since 2009, spreads frontman Alex Kapranos’ arch sentiment above glammy post-punk struts with undimmed vigor. However late into the afterparty we may be, there’s ever time for one more dance. JAY HORTON. Roseland Theater, 8 NW 6th Ave., 224-2038. 9 pm. $30. All ages.

Bleeding Rainbow

[BAR BAND] No offense to the noisy, Philly guitar-pop act Bleeding Rainbow, which is a perfectly fine Sonic Youth homage, but the recommendation here is less for the music than the locale. Who knows why Sloan’s—the Boise-Eliot bar with the


Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014

semi truck sticking out of its side—is hosting this show. But who can pass up the chance to see a cool indie buzz band play a dive whose décor hasn’t changed since the Carter administration? Let’s hope things go well enough here for this to become a semi-regular occurrence, because Sloan’s is truly one of the Portland bar scene’s under-the-radar gems. MATTHEW SINGER. Sloan’s Tavern, 36 N Russell St., 287-2262. 9 pm. $5. 21+.

SUNDAY, APRIL 27 Duck Little Brother Duck, Special Explosion, Heavy Petting, Leatherdaddy

[FRIENDLY MATH ROCK] Duck, Little Brother, Duck has been around since 2010, playing intimate spaces to a dedicated fan base. With a busy tour schedule and art projects outside of the band—guitairistvocalist Jon Scheid just published photos in a zine—the band hasn’t oversaturated the local circuit. Its last album, No Spitting on Cats During Plaque Time, delivers the caught-in-a-flurry emo math rock of its previous albums. These guys are serious about sustaining and improving upon a well-liked underground genre. LYLA ROWEN. Laughing Horse Books, 12 NE 10th Ave., 236-2893. 8 pm. $5. All ages.

MONDAY, APRIL 28 Higgins Waterproof Black Magic Band, Chris Brokaw, Chimurenga Renaissance

[SIDE GAMES] As TV on the Radio side projects go, Tunde Adebimpe’s Higgins Waterproof Black Magic Band falls somewhere between Dave Sitek’s Maximum Balloon and Kyp Malone’s Rain Machine. The songs on the band’s debut EP mostly meander along in a dubby haze, following Adebimpe’s distinctively soulful voice even though he doesn’t seem to be traveling in any particular direction. There are no real grooves to latch onto and only a few muted eruptions of noise. Still, it’s a decent enough detour— though it’ll only make you wonder why this is taking time away from a new TVOTR record. Speaking of side projects, opener Chimurenga Renaissance is the spacey spin-off of Shabazz Palaces’ Tendai Maraire, and it’s actually a bit more colorful than either the headliner or his main outfit. MATTHEW SINGER. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., 2319663. 9 pm. $10 advance, $12 day of show. 21+.


[HEADY JAM SESSION] The psych revival is in full swing, giving fans of brain-twisting space rock much to cheer about. Brighton’s Toy is positioned toward the front of the English pack, still riding the wave it created via the release of sophomore record Join the Dots last year. The quintet concocts a mindaltering batch of blistering guitar attacks, moody effects and piercing synthesizers with extended song lengths. It’s a bit Dark Side of the Moon, a bit MGMT, and guaranteed to melt your gourd. MARK STOCK. Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside St., 231-9663. 8 pm. $12. 21+.

Mastodon, Gojira, Kvelertak

[METAL] Ladies and gentlemen, this is a serious lineup. Atlanta metal heroes Mastodon are coming to town, and they’re bringing a pair of heavy hitters with them. Known for obliterating faces in their home country of France, ecoadvocates Gojira are set to demolish the Roseland after selling out the Hawthorne last time around. That is, if anything remains after upand-comers Kvelterak—who’s singer rocks a taxidermied owl as headgear—are unleashed upon Portland.

Oh, and if that doesn’t have you salivating, Mastodon has a new record coming this summer. We are not worthy. SAM CUSUMANO Roseland Theater, 8 NW 6th Ave., 224-2038. 7:30 pm. $25 general admission, $40 reserve. All ages.


[CONTEMPORARY CHORAL] The superb little vocal ensemble drawn from the ranks of the city’s top choirs continues to broaden its horizons, expanding to 17 voices and adding strings and keyboard for this concert of music by some of today’s most impressive living composers for voice. The program includes two works by Estonian-born living legend Arvo Part, American composers Frank Ferko and Stephen Paulus and two of the younger stars of choral music, Norwegian composer Ola Gjeilo and Britain’s Tarik O’Regan, who draw on influences ranging from medieval and Renaissance sounds to modern rock. BRETT CAMPBELL. First Christian Church, 1314 SW Park Ave., 228-9211. 8 pm Friday, April 25. $15-$20.

John Stowell and Kendra Shank

[JAZZ DUETS] Portlanders know John Stowell as one of the city’s finest jazz guitarists, renowned for his collaborations with Northwest legend David Friesen and many others. Jazzers know him as a musician’s musician. One such jazzer is the inventive Seattle-born, New York-based singer Kendra Shank, who’s worked with Shirley Horn, Gary Bartz and others. After two decades of friendship, Stowell and Shank just recorded their first duet album, the shimmering New York Conversations, the release of which they’re celebrating with a national tour. BRETT CAMPBELL. O’Connor’s Vault, 7850 SW Capitol Highway, 244-1690. 7 pm Friday, April 25. $12 advance, $15 day of show.

Third Angle New Music Presents “Maria de Buenos Aires” by Astor Piazzolla

[NUEVO TANGO OPERA] It’s oldhome week for the city’s veteran new-music ensemble, as it brings back the “tango opera” Maria de Buenos Aires for the fourth time. This performance of the great 20thcentury Argentine composer Astor Piazzolla’s dark, melancholy 1968 classic—populated by ghosts, criminals, marionettes, psychoanalysts and more—also features Madridborn tenor Pepe Raphael from the Bottle Blondes and Pink Martini), bandoneon master Coco Trevisonno, and renowned Portland tango dancers Alex Krebs and Hannah Poston, with evocative lighting and other theatrical touches contributed by Hand2Mouth Theater director Jonathan Walters. BRETT CAMPBELL. Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell St., 284-8686. 7:30 Friday, April 25. $10-$30. 21+.

Regina Carter

[JAZZ VIOLIN] Detroit native Regina Carter has been one of jazz’s top violinists for a couple decades now, but on her new recording, Southern Comfort, “fiddler” seems the appropriate term, inasmuch as it consists of jazzy takes on the folk music of the South, her Alabama coalminer granddad’s ancestral home. Researching field recordings from the Library of Congress led her to explore Appalachian ballads, Cajun fiddle tunes, gospel, work songs and more, including recent classics by Hank Williams and Gram Parsons, and her improvisational chops (with a band that includes a pair of guitarists) blow away any whiffs of academicism. BRETT CAMPBELL. Jimmy Mak’s, 221 NW 10th Ave., 295-6542. 7 and 9:30 pm Monday, April 28. $25 general admission, $30 reserved. Under 21 allowed until 9 pm.


PROFILE | 877.274.0410

SOUVENIR DRIVER WEDNESDAY, APRIL 23 When Neil Young delivered the keynote address at South by Southwest last month, a lot of musicians were listening. He was pushing his new project, PonoMusic, a portable music player rendering digital audio files with the rich, analog sound of the Harvest Moon era. Nate Wey hasn’t listened to the Toblerone-shaped device yet, but he certainly falls in the pro-analog category. The frontman for Portland dream-rock outfit Souvenir Driver pines for thickness of sound. Hence a successful Kickstarter campaign for the band’s first vinyl release, Living Water. It’s the quartet’s strongest work to date, delivering 10 tracks governed by ’90s rock, shoegaze and dreamy, downright subconscious pop. The record is deserving of a needle, amp and solid set of speakers. “We all want the songs to play off each other and supplement and interact with each other,” Wey says. “I just think records are the best way to do that.” Even the digital version has a lush fluidity, echoing the wavy projections that play behind Souvenir Driver onstage. “Movies inspire a lot of the music I’m involved with,” says the former film student. “We want to create the feeling of movement.” The plan was to create 10 songs reflecting 10 different moods and colors. There’s “All the Patterns,” a reverb-ridden power anthem that could pass for early Interpol, a song Wey labels “dark blue or light purple.” There’s the hazy and lethargic “Yearning Possibilities,” a lucid ambient-rock dream further sedated by Wey’s whispered vocals. There’s noticeable texture on the record, with homage paid to past slow-diving acts like Monster Movie and the Radio Department. Souvernir Driver started as a solo experiment when Wey’s other band, Happy Prescriptions, was breaking up. From the initial Joy LP came an urge to play live, and soon Wey was recruiting some of his favorite musicians over beers. Souvenir Driver currently includes drummer and the Upsidedown member Bob Mild; guitarist Ethan Homan, formerly of Soft Paws and Tiger House; and Travis Hendricks on keyboards and percussion. “Bliss pop” is how they describe the band’s sound. There’s spirituality in there, too, but Wey talks about it without the jaded preachiness of a canvassing Mormon on a Huffy, citing Mr. Follow Your Bliss himself, Joseph Campbell, rather than theology. “Songwriting should come from that raw, vulnerable and dangerous space,” Wey says. Bliss may be optimistic, but it’s certainly not always sun and smiles, as demonstrated on Living Water. The record teems with melancholic waves of guitar but avoids coming off as despondent. It’s shoegaze with grungy jolts that uppercut your chin now and again. “Writing spiritually is very similar to writing under the influence,” Wey says. “But thankfully, we don’t need to be high out of our minds every day to go to those strange and mysterious places.” That is, perhaps, where Wey and Neil Young might disagree. MARK STOCK. Portland shoegazers follow their bliss into an analog daydream.

SEE IT: Souvenir Driver plays Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi Ave., with Tender Age and Bubble Cats, on Wednesday, April 23. 9 pm. $6 advance, $8 day of show. 21+.

Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014



Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014


[APRIL 23-29] ponderosa lounge

= ww pick. Highly recommended. Editor: Mitch Lillie. TO HAVE YOUR EVENT LISTED, send show information at least two weeks in advance on the web at Press kits, CDs and especially vinyl can be sent to Music Desk, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Please include show or release date information with all physical mailings. Email: For more listings, check out

10350 N Vancouver Way Battle of the Bands

ringlers pub

1332 W Burnside The Windshield Vipers

roseland Theater


8 NW 6th Ave. Drive- By Truckers, Shovels & Rope


315 SE 3rd Ave. Gladness, Beach Party, Temper and Hold & Youth Debut

Secret Society Ballroom

116 NE Russell St. Redray Frazier, Department of Gold, Dean!


1033 NW 16th Ave. The Runs, Piefight, the Choices

Splash Bar Hawaiian Grill

904 NW Couch Jordan Harris & Christie Bradley

Star Theater

13 NW 6th Ave. Petty Fever, Frank Murrays Award Winning Tribute to Tom Petty

The Conga Club

riNG ArOUNd THe pUNK rOCKerS: play date plays Katie O’Brien’s on Saturday, April 26.

wed. April 23 Al’s den

303 SW 12th Ave. Adam Sweeney

Alberta rose Theatre 3000 NE Alberta St. Tigran Hamasyan

Boon’s Treasury

888 Liberty St. NE Chris Baron

Cadigan’s Corner Bar 5501 SE 72nd Ave. Band Swap with Pat Stilwell

Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside Street Jefferson Starship, The Windshield Vipers


350 W Burnside St. Jim Jones Revue

doug Fir lounge

830 E Burnside St. Sleeper Agent, HOLYCHILD, Pagiins

duff’s Garage

1635 SE 7th Ave. Parker Milsap


2126 SW Halsey St. Lyrica

Hawthorne Theatre lounge

1503 SE Cesar E Chavez Blvd. Mikey Davis, Luke McCain


1001 SE Morrison St. The Resistance, Cataldo, Serge Severe, St. Even

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. Mel Brown Quartet, the Christopher Brown Quartet


lola’s room

1332 W Burnside Matthew Curry, Sonny Hess

Mississippi Studios 3939 N Mississippi Ave. Souvenir Driver, Tender Age, Bubble Cats

roseland Theater 8 NW 6th Ave. The 1975


1033 NW 16th Ave. Magesterial, Ian Gorman Weiland, Soul Ipsum, Sunken Colony, Waver Clamor Bellow, 451

Starday Tavern

6517 SE Foster Road JT Wise Band

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St. Gallons, Ghetto Ghouls, Coma Serfs

The lodge Bar & Grill 6605 SE Powell Blvd. Pete Ford Band

The lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. Psychopomp Curated by Ogo Eion

The press Club

2621 SE Clinton St. Coconino Trio

The whiskey Bar

31 NW 1st Ave. Jillionaire

Tillicum restaurant & Bar 8585 SW BeavertonHillsdale Hwy. High Boltage

Trail’s end Saloon 1320 Main Street Big Monti

Upper playground

112 SW 2nd Ave. Pat Buckley

23 NW 5th Ave. Ripley Snell

laurelThirst public House

white eagle Saloon

2958 NE Glisan St. Honeybaked Hamm and the Choice Cuts (9 pm); Feathers & Friends (6 pm)

836 N Russell St. Jim Creek

wilf’s restaurant & Bar 800 NW 6th Ave. Ron Steen Trio with Linda Lee Michelet

THUrS. April 24 Al’s den

303 SW 12th Ave. Adam Sweeney

Alberta rose Theatre 3000 NE Alberta St. Simon Townshend

Alhambra Theatre

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Mercury’s Antenna, This Twilight Orchestra, Accolade, Vin Al Eden

Analog Cafe & Theater 720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Muevete Jueves

Ash Street Saloon

225 SW Ash St. Young Splendor, Endless Loop, Larrabee

Beaterville Cafe

2201 N Killingsworth St. Amber Sweeney Songwriter Showcase

Blue diamond

2016 NE Sandy Blvd. Ben Jones and Friends


320 SE 2nd Ave. Eyehategod, Stoneburner, Sioux and Dead By Dawn

Broadway rose New Stage Auditorium 12850 SW Grant Ave. The Bikinis

Bunk Bar

1028 SE Water Ave. WL, Tender Age, Appendixes

Cadigan’s Corner Bar 5501 SE 72nd Ave. Kenny Lee Blues Jam

Calapooia Brewing

140 Hill St. NE Wild Hog in The Woods

Chapel pub

430 N Killingworth St. Steve Kerin


1665 SE Bybee Ave. Mike Winkle

Crystal Ballroom

1332 W Burnside Street Camp Fire Columbia’s Youth and Celebrity Talent Show


350 W Burnside St. Fortunate Youth

dig a pony

736 Southeast Grand Ave. Newrotics

doug Fir lounge

830 E Burnside St. Polecat, Big E Trio, The Moonshine


4923 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd. Dina y Los Rumberos

The Firkin Tavern

1937 SE 11th Ave. Clarke and the Himselfs, Radion, John Value

The GoodFoot lounge 2845 SE Stark St. Zach Deputy

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St. Company, The Damage Done, Pageripper

The lodge Bar & Grill 6605 SE Powell Blvd. Ben Rice B3 Trio

1800 E Burnside St. Eat Off Your Banjo!, Dinner and Live Bluegrass

The Muddy rudder public House


The Original Halibut’s ii

2126 SW Halsey St. Ditchtown

Gemini lounge

6526 SE Foster Rd. Scott Austin

Hawthorne Theatre 1507 SE 39th Ave. Anvil, Cemetery Lust, Spellcaster, Maniak

Jade lounge

2342 SE Ankeny St. Pacific Oceans with Host Colin Fisher

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. Mel Brown B3 Organ Group


112 SW 2nd Ave. Pat Buckley

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. Common Dear, My Brothers and I, Samsel and the Skirt

Kennedy School

5736 NE 33rd Ave. Lee Koch Trio

laurelThirst public House

8105 SE 7th Ave. Fern Hill

2525 NE Alberta St. Terry Robb

The Tea Zone and Camellia lounge

510 NW 11th Ave. Margie Gibson & John Gilmore Duets

The waypost Coffeehouse & Tavern 3120 N Williams Ave. The Neo-Pagan Jazz Bastards

Tillicum restaurant & Bar

8585 SW BeavertonHillsdale Hwy. Julie Collura Jazz Duo

Vie de Boheme 1530 SE 7th Ave. The Djangophiles

white eagle Saloon

836 N Russell St. Chris Baron and Friends

white eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. The Fire Weeds

Fri. April 25 Al’s den

Mississippi pizza

Alberta rose Theatre

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Trans Am, Federation X, Life Coach, Drab Majesty, Hot Victory

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Adventure Galley, Hustle and Drone, Foreign Orange, Fringe Class, Still Caves, People Under the Sun

303 SW 12th Ave. Adam Sweeney 3000 NE Alberta St. Jos James, Moonchild

Alberta Street public House

1036 NE Alberta St. Three for Silver, Kotorino

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. The Shanghai Woolies, Reggie Houston and Janice Scroggins


Analog Cafe & Theater

112 SW 2nd Ave. Grafton Street

Beech Street parlor

426 SW Washington St. Federale

Benson Hotel

2025 N Kilpatrick St. Deer Souls

720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. L.F.G.M 412 NE Beech St. Acid Farm

309 SW Broadway Linda Lee Michelet Duo

Biddy McGraw’s

6000 NE Glisan St. The Wild Wood

Blue diamond

2016 NE Sandy Blvd. Michael Osborne and the Drivers

Boon’s Treasury

888 Liberty St. NE Will West & The Friendly Strangers


320 SE 2nd Ave. Shlohmo

Broadway rose New Stage Auditorium 12850 SW Grant Ave. The Bikinis

Bunk Bar

1028 SE Water Ave. Rick Bain and The Genius Position, The Hugs and Norman

Cadigan’s Corner Bar 5501 SE 72nd Ave. Live Music

Calapooia Brewing 140 Hill St. NE Orchestre de Monte Calvo

Clinton Street Theater 2522 SE Clinton St. Subterranean Howl

Crush Bar

1400 SE Morrison St. A Peoples Choir


350 W Burnside St. Fernando, Michael Dean Damron, Sarah Gwen and Hearts of Oak

doug Fir lounge

830 E Burnside St. Barracuda: The Essential Tribute to Heart, Metts, Ryan, & Collins


2126 SW Halsey St. The Marvins

evans Auditorium

0615 S.W. Palatine Hill Road Cappella Nova & Women’s Chorus: Inspired by the Past

Hawthorne Theatre lounge

1503 SE Cesar E Chavez Blvd. Aisle of View, No More Parachutes, Natural Remedy

Hollywood’s Hot rod Bar & Grill 10810 NE Sandy Blvd. Responsible Party

Hotel Oregon

310 NE Evans St. Pretend Sweethearts

imago dei Community

2958 NE Glisan St. The Kelly Brightwell Band, Alison Rice

3552 N Mississippi Ave. Hungry, Hungry Hip Hop, Ritim Egzotic

Alhambra Theatre

1302 SE Ankeny St Josh Garrels

Jade lounge 2342 SE Ankeny St. Dan Eagan Sings the Blues

Jantzen Beach Bar & Grill

909 N. Hayden Island Dr. Andy Stokes Band

Kelly’s Olympian

Kenton Club

laurelThirst public House

2958 NE Glisan St. Counterfeit Cash (9:30 pm); Alice Stuart (6 pm)

Mississippi pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave. Sam Cooper Band

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Red Fang, Lord Dying, Norskay, Black Pussy, Ancient Warlock, Chron Goblin

O’Connor’s Vault

7850 SW Capitol HWy John Stowell and Kendra Shank

Tony Starlight’s Supper Club

3728 NE Sandy Blvd. The Bureau of Standards Big Band


4144 SE 60th Ave. Cilantro Music

Trail’s end Saloon 1320 Main Street Mike Branch Band

Venetian Theatre & Bistro 253 E Main St. Peter Breinholt

Vie de Boheme

1530 SE 7th Ave. Ken deRouchie Band

white eagle Saloon

836 N Russell St. Sammy Witness and the Reassignment, Planes on Paper, Merilouis, Reverb Brothers

wilf’s restaurant & Bar 800 NW 6th Ave. Tony Pacini Trio

wonder Ballroom

128 NE Russell St. Maria de Buenos Aires by Astor Piazzolla

ponderosa lounge

10350 N Vancouver Way Trailer Choir

rock Creek Tavern

10000 NW Old Cornelius Pass Rd. Garcia Birthday Band

Secret Society Ballroom

116 NE Russell St. Growing Gardens 1940s Fundraiser, Sportin’ Lifers


1033 NW 16th Ave. Spear & Magic Helmet, GITS Tribute Band

The Firkin Tavern

1937 SE 11th Ave. Atlas and the Astronaut, Grandhorse, ManX

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St. Zyanose, Warcry, Bi-Marks, Reactor

SAT. April 26 Al’s den

303 SW 12th Ave. Adam Sweeney

Alhambra Theatre

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Through the Roots, New Kingston, The Steppas

Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall

1037 SW Broadway Distant Worlds: Music from Final Fantasy

Artichoke Music

3130 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Women’s Songwriter Night, Avery Hill, Karyn Ann Partridge and Kelly Boswell

Beaterville Cafe

2201 N Killingsworth St. Vanessa Rogers

The living room Theater-portland

Beech Street parlor

The Muddy rudder public House

Blue diamond

341 SW 10th Ave . The Gravy

8105 SE 7th Ave. Terry Robb & Lauren Sheehan

The Original Halibut’s ii 2525 NE Alberta St. Duffy Bishop

The press Club

2621 SE Clinton St. Bear Water

The red And Black Cafe

400 SE 12th Ave. Brian Gathy with Josh Gates, Izzakate

The Tea Zone and Camellia lounge 510 NW 11th Ave. Rich Haley 4

412 NE Beech St. California Mike and Weird Cactus 2016 NE Sandy Blvd. A.C. Porter and the LiveWires

Boon’s Treasury

888 Liberty St. NE Brad Creel & the Reel Deel

Broadway rose New Stage Auditorium 12850 SW Grant Ave. The Bikinis

Bunk Bar

1028 SE Water Ave. Howler

Calapooia Brewing 140 Hill St. NE The Van Meyers

Clyde’s prime rib restaurant & Bar

The Tonic lounge

5474 NE Sandy Blvd. Norman Sylvester

The whiskey Bar

350 W Burnside St. Smoochknob

Thirsty lion pub

830 E Burnside St. Tokyo Police Club

Tigardville Station

1635 SE 7th Ave. Robbie Laws Blues Party

3100 NE Sandy Blvd. The Grrrl Front 31 NW 1st Ave. LoudPVCK

SW 2nd & Ash St. Cronin Tierney


doug Fir lounge

duff’s Garage

12370 SW Main Street The Sandy Saunders Band


Tillicum restaurant & Bar


8585 SW BeavertonHillsdale Hwy. Hot Club of Hawthorne

1800 E Burnside St. White Bear Polar Tundra 2126 SW Halsey St. Moody Little Sister Duo

CONT. on page 38 Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014




2010 SE 8th Ave. Virtuousity Featuring: Sandra Collins, Equanimous Minds, Flave, Sick Descions

Gemini Lounge

6526 SE Foster Rd. Amber Harlan Granmo

Hawthorne Theatre

1507 SE 39th Ave. You Me At Six, Deaf Havana, Stars In Stereo

WEEKLY! Sign up @





APRIL 23–29

Hawthorne Theatre Lounge

1503 SE Cesar E Chavez Blvd. Patoirlove, M.D. Edwards

Hotel Oregon

310 NE Evans St. Michele Van Kleef Katie O’Brien’s 2809 NE Sandy Blvd Greg & Shanti/Play Date, Ty Vaughn

Jimmy Mak’s

221 NW 10th Ave. The Andy Stokes Band


112 SW 2nd Ave. Grafton Street

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. Muffassa, Surfs Drugs, Bleach Blonde Dudes

Kenton Club

2025 N Kilpatrick St. C. Morris Brown

LaurelThirst Public House 2958 NE Glisan St. Jim Boyer Band (9:30 pm); The Yellers (6 pm)

Marmoset Music 2105 SE 7th Ave Blitzen Trapper

Midnight Roundup

345 NW Burnside Rd. Country Wide

Mission Theater

1624 NW Glisan St. PHAME Choir, Laura Gibson

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. YOB, Black Cobra, Diesto, Drunk Dad, Honduran

Ponderosa Lounge

10350 N Vancouver Way Leah Turner

Ringlers Pub

1332 W Burnside Floating Pointe

Rock Creek Tavern

10000 NW Old Cornelius Pass Rd. August in Blue


Roseland Theater

8 NW 6th Ave. Franz Ferdinand

Secret Society Ballroom 116 NE Russell St. Violet Isle, The Rocktarts, Bryan Flannery/Tom Smith Duo, The Jenny Finn Orchestra


1033 NW 16th Ave. The Cool Whips, Michele Ari

Sloan’s Tavern

36 N Russell St. Bleeding Rainbow

The Know

2026 NE Alberta St. The Suicide Notes, The Tripwires, The Fucking Eagles

The Old Church

1422 SW 11th Ave. Choral Arts Ensemble presents ‘Wine and Roses’

The Original Halibut’s II 2525 NE Alberta St. Margo Tufo

The Press Club

2621 SE Clinton St. Sagebrush Sisters

The Secret Society

116 NE Russell St Benefit for The Help On The Way Project

The Tea Zone and Camellia Lounge 510 NW 11th Ave. Brooks Robertson

The Waypost Coffeehouse & Tavern 3120 N Williams Ave.


Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014

THE BELGIAN RESISTANCE: Northwest 21st Avenue can be a bizarre place after dark, populated by slumming Pearlies, roving packs descended from the near-West Hills and the withering down-and-outers peeking in and out of Joe’s Cellar, Underdogs and the 21st Avenue Bar & Grill. During the day, these same sidewalks are pleasant oases, and The Abbey Bar (716 NW 21st Ave., 222-1593, is a serious daytime beer bar of the sort the neighborhood hasn’t yet seen, with a row of baby tables hugging the edges of the public walkway. The loyally Belgian bar sports three refrigerated cases storing hundreds of bottles at different temperatures, plus six taps served in a bewildering variety of stemware. Most drafts are imported and priced up to $10 per pint, but the frugally discerning can pay $4 for a 12-ounce glass of Pfriem’s Belgian Strong Dark, our 2014 Beer of the Year, or spy a bargain Old Rasputin in the coolers. The Abbey’s interior is as clinically hard-topped and spartan as that of its predecessor, the unmourned Melt, but you won’t mind so much in the summertime. You’ll be outside, melting into a deceptively alcoholic Pfriem, a sunny Houblon Chouffe or a goofball trans-Atlantic brewing collaboration. Miracles happen every day in Belgium, and all of them are beer. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Violet and The Undercurrents, Caroline Bauer

Hotel Oregon

The Know

Thirsty Lion Pub

Jade Lounge


SW 2nd & Ash St. Boys Next Door


4144 SE 60th Ave. Dennis Elmer

Trail’s End Saloon 1320 Main Street Valhallah

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. DoveDriver

Wilf’s Restaurant & Bar

800 NW 6th Ave. Devin Phillips Quartet, Jazz Saxaphone Extraordinaire

SUN. APRIL 27 Al’s Den

303 SW 12th Ave. Hip Hatchet

Aladdin Theater

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave. Jake Shimabukaro

Blue Diamond

2016 NE Sandy Blvd. Kevin Selfe and the Tornadoes Jam Session

Broadway Rose New Stage Auditorium 12850 SW Grant Ave. The Bikinis

Bunk Bar

1028 SE Water Ave. Deleted Scenes

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. TRUST, Mozart’s Sister


2126 SW Halsey St. Julie McCarl and Bodacious

Hawthorne Theatre

1507 SE 39th Ave. Ready For The Industry

Hawthorne Theatre Lounge

1503 SE Cesar E Chavez Blvd. Miggs, Open Air Stereo, Man on Earth

310 NE Evans St. Lee Koch 2342 SE Ankeny St. Moorea Masa, Allison Hall & Guest


112 SW 2nd Ave. Danny O’Hanlon

Kelly’s Olympian

426 SW Washington St. Sioux Falls, Lutra and Snow Roller

Lauging Horse Books

12 NE 10th Ave.. Duck Little Brother Duck, Special Explosion, Heavy Petting, Leatherdaddy

LaurelThirst Public House 2958 NE Glisan St. Cheerful/Tearful (9 pm); Freak Mountain Ramblers (6 pm)

Mississippi Pizza

3552 N Mississippi Ave. Mark Edel

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Federale, Daydream Machine


7850 SW Capitol Hwy. A Fine Mess

Reed College

3203 SE Woodstock Blvd. Music Department Concert

Rock Creek Tavern

10000 NW Old Cornelius Pass Rd. Johnny B Connolly & Leonard Barry


600 E. Burnside St. Your Rival, Levon’s Helmet

Roseland Theater 8 NW 6th Ave. Pennywise

Secret Society Ballroom

116 NE Russell St. Wildish, Hannah Glavor & The Family Band, Jeffrey Martin


1033 NW 16th Ave. Grand Style Orchestra

2026 NE Alberta St. Griswold 232 SW Ankeny St. The Hugs, Pschomagic

Vie De Boheme 1530 SE 7th Ave. Padam Padam

Warner Pacific College 2219 SE 68th Ave. Spring Choir Concert

White Eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. The Brothers Jam

MON. APRIL 28 Al’s Den

303 SW 12th Ave. Hip Hatchet

Andina Restaurant 1314 NW Glisan Pete Krebs

Arlene Schnitzer Concert Hall

1037 SW Broadway John Williams: Maestro of the Movies

Beech Street Parlor 412 NE Beech St. Patt DeWitt

Blue Diamond

2016 NE Sandy Blvd. Hot Tea Cold


350 W Burnside St. Karaoke from Hell

Dig a Pony

736 Southeast Grand Ave. A Train and Ramblin John Husband

Doug Fir Lounge

830 E Burnside St. Higgins Waterproof Black Magic Band, Chris Brokaw

Duff’s Garage

1635 SE 7th Ave. Keeter and Allison

Jade Lounge

2342 SE Ankeny St. The Global Folk Club, Andrea Wild

april 23–29 Jimmy Mak’s

Ash Street Saloon

Mississippi pizza

221 NW 10th Ave. Regina Carter, The Dan Balmer Trio

225 SW Ash St. Tae Phoenix, Mbrascatu, Jeni Wren


Blue diamond

3939 N Mississippi Ave. The Pizza Underground, Wampire, Tiger House


8 NW 6th Ave. Mastodon

112 SW 2nd Ave. Danny O’Hanlon

Mississippi Studios

3939 N Mississippi Ave. Moon Duo, Kikagaku Moyo, Eternal Tapestry

rock Creek Tavern

2016 NE Sandy Blvd. The Gretchen Mitchell Band 320 SE 2nd Ave. Grieves and Son Real, Fearce Vill

10000 NW Old Cornelius Pass Rd. Bob Shoemaker

Bunk Bar


Cadigan’s Corner Bar

1028 SE Water Ave. Sama Dams and Genders

232 SW Ankeny St. Haste, Landlines

white eagle Saloon 836 N Russell St. Singer Songwriter Showcase, Eric John Kaiser

TueS. April 29 Al’s den

303 SW 12th Ave. Hip Hatchet

Aladdin Theater

3017 SE Milwaukie Ave. Los Lonely Boys

Alberta rose Theatre

3000 NE Alberta St. Edna Vazquez, Luz Elena Mendoza and the Maria Maria Choir

Alhambra Theatre

4811 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Light Creates Shadow, the Mercury Tree, A Collective Subconscious

116 NE Russell St. Peter Buck, Super-Earth


doug fir lounge

duff’s Garage

2845 SE Stark St. Radula

NS 3rd & Couch St. Grant Reynolds


Secret Society Ballroom

3341 SE Belmont St. The Pagan Jug Band

The Muddy rudder public House 8105 SE 7th Ave. Lloyd Jones

roseland Theater

dixie Tavern

1033 NW 16th Ave. Master, Dead Compiracy, Fisthammer, NervoChaos

830 E Burnside St. Toy

1635 SE 7th Ave. Dover Weinberg Quartet

The Blue Monk

The Goodfoot lounge

The Know


2026 NE Alberta St. Absolut

Jimmy Mak’s

8775 SW Canyon Ln. Hot Jam Night, Tracey Fordice and The 8-Balls

2126 SW Halsey St. Steve Bradley and Scott Ackers 221 NW 10th Ave. Mel Brown Septet, Rosemont Ridge Jazz Ensemble

The lehrer

The Tonic lounge

3100 NE Sandy Blvd. Item 9


The waypost Coffeehouse & Tavern

Kelly’s olympian


112 SW 2nd Ave. Brian O’Dell 426 SW Washington St. PALS Fest Benefit

laurelThirst public House

2958 NE Glisan St. Amanda Richards, Good Long Whiles (9 pm), Jackstraw (6 pm)

220 SW Ankeny St. Lionsden

Mississippi Studios

1033 NW 16th Ave. Uzala, Ephemeros, Chron Goblin, Blackwitch Pudding

5501 SE 72nd Ave. Hip Deep

Harlem portland

3552 N Mississippi Ave. Supadupa Marimba

3120 N Williams Ave. Joy Autumn & Friends 232 SW Ankeny St. Vektroid, Magic Fades

white eagle Saloon

836 N Russell St. ADD Love Showcase, Hunter Paye, Paleo, Will West, The Druthers

wed. April 23 Beech Street parlor 412 NE Beech St. DJ Hornet Leg


19 SW 2nd Ave. DJ Seleckta YT, Riddim Up Wednesday

CC Slaughters Nightclub & lounge 219 NW Davis St. DJ Robb, Trick

Ground Kontrol Classic Arcade 511 NW Couch St. TRONix, Bryan Zentz

Harlem portland

220 SW Ankeny St. DJ Jack

Moloko plus

3967 N Mississippi Ave. King Tim 33 1/3

Star Bar

639 SE Morrison St. DJ OverCol

Tiga Bar portland

1465 NE Prescott St. DJ Kevin Lee

THurS. April 24 Analog Cafe & Theater 720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Bubble Up

B.C.’s Bar & Grill 2433 SE Powell Tetsuo

Beech Street parlor 412 NE Beech St. DJ Sea Turtle


19 SW 2nd Ave. Study Hall With DJ Suga Shane

Harlem portland

220 SW Ankeny St. DJ Tourmaline, DJ Valen

Moloko plus

3967 N Mississippi Ave. Morganixx and Friends


lola’s room

1001 SE Morrison St. Club Crooks, DJ Izm, Mr. Marcus

Moloko plus

3967 N Mississippi Ave. Lamar LeRoy


315 SE 3rd Ave. Blowpony: Princess Superstar, Nandi La Sophia

1001 SE Morrison St. Snap!: Dr. Adam, Colin Jones, Freaky Outty 1332 W Burnside 80s Video Dance Attack 3967 N Mississippi Ave. Hans Fricking Lindauer Rhythm and Soul Review, Monkeytek & Friends

Star Bar

The lovecraft

Star Theater

421 SE Grand Ave. Rock with Death Trip & DJ Tobias

Tiga Bar portland

1465 NE Prescott St. DJ Baron

fri. April 25 CC Slaughters Nightclub & lounge 219 NW Davis St. DJ Jakob Jay, Sweat Fridays

CC Slaughters Nightclub & lounge

219 NW Davis St. Sound Glitter, DJ Peter Calandra

dig a pony

736 Southeast Grand Ave. Cooky Parker


1800 E Burnside St. Club Crooks, DJ Izm and Egg

dig a pony

736 Southeast Grand Ave. Freaky Outty

315 SE 3rd Ave. The Cockpit: The Perfect CYN, Nathan Detroit, Sci Fi Sol, Art of Hot

639 SE Morrison St. DJ Andrew Loomis


13 NW 6th Ave. Cooper and the Jam

The Goodfoot lounge 2845 SE Stark St. Soul Stew: DJ Aquaman

The lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. DJ Horrid

The rose Bar

111 SW Ash St Trifecta:Pete Moss

Tiga Bar portland

1465 NE Prescott St. DJ Spliff Huxtable


232 SW Ankeny St. Deep Burn: SPF666, Commune

SAT. April 26 CC Slaughters Nightclub & lounge 219 NW Davis St. Revolution, DJ Robb

Crush Bar

1400 SE Morrison St. A Family Affair Continues


Moloko plus


Star Theater

13 NW 6th Ave. Andaz: Bhangra/ Bollywood Dance Party, DJs Anjali & The Incredible Kid

The lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. Darkness Descends Dance Night

The whiskey Bar 31 NW 1st Ave. DJ Dan

Tiga Bar portland

1465 NE Prescott St. Beacon Sound

SuN. April 27 Analog Cafe & Theater 720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. Sensory, Bittersweet Productions and PANZEN

CC Slaughters Nightclub & lounge

MoN. April 28 Ash Street Saloon

225 SW Ash St. DJ Smooth Hopperator

CC Slaughters Nightclub & lounge

219 NW Davis St. Maniac Monday, With DJ Robb

The lovecraft

421 SE Grand Ave. Departures, DJ Waisted and Friends

Tiga Bar portland

1465 NE Prescott St. THC DJs

TueS. April 29 Analog Cafe & Theater 720 SE Hawthorne Blvd. S.Y.N.T. Weekly Dubstep Night

Beech Street parlor 412 NE Beech St. DJ Crambone


19 SW 2nd Ave. Soundstation Tuesdays, DJ Instigatah and Snackmaster DJ

CC Slaughters Nightclub & lounge

219 NW Davis St. TNA Tuesdays, DJ Jakob Jay

dig a pony

736 Southeast Grand Ave. Bobby Dangerous

Hawthorne Theatre

219 NW Davis St. The Superstar Divas, DJ Robb

1507 SE 39th Ave. Millionaires, Eryn Woods

The lovecraft

1465 NE Prescott St. Apres-Midi DJs

421 SE Grand Ave. Danger Zone!

Tiga Bar portland

Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014


WEDNESDAY, APRIL 23 9pm. 21 & Over


THURSDAY, APRIL 24 8pm. All Ages



All Ages All AGeS! beneFit For SMyrc! SPEAR AND MAGIC HELMET JONNY X & THE GROADIES LABRYSE $5.00 at the door.

SATURDAY, APRIL 26 9pm. 21 & Over Tourniquet Presents... THE COOL WHIPS MICHELE ARI


TUESDAY, APRIL 29 9pm. 21 & Over

UZALA EPHEMEROS CHRON GOBLIN BLACKWITCH PUDDING $10.00 at the door. Falafel House: 3 to Late–Night All Ages Shows: Every Sunday 8–11pm Free Pinball Feeding Frenzy: Saturday @ 3pm


1033 NW 16TH AVE. (971) 229-1455 OPEN: 3–2:30AM EVERY DAY

HAPPY HOUR: MON–FRI NOON–7PM PoP-A-Shot • PinbAll • Skee-bAll Air hockey • Free Wi-Fi


Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014



BEYOND THE BADGER YOUTUBE LEGEND RANDALL MADE A CAREER FOR HIMSELF POST-HONEY BADGER FAME. NOW HE PLAYS GUIDANCE COUNSELOR FOR OTHER MEMES. In early 2011, a mysterious man, identifying himself only as “Randall,” posted a video to YouTube. A dubbed-over National Geographic segment on honey badgers, The Crazy Nastyass Honey Badger featured Randall’s flamboyant, New York-accented narration: “Honey badger don’t care, honey badger don’t give a shit. It just takes what it wants.” The video quickly went viral. Today, it has more than 66 million views. But Randall didn’t just fade into oblivion. He has channeled his popularity, and his genuine love for wildlife, into other projects: more dubbed videos, including Honey Badger Narrates: The Great White Sea-Monster and Honey Badger Narrates: The Stiffy Goat; a book about such animals as the emperor tamarin and the pink fairy armadillo; and commercials for pistachios and phone systems. In anticipation of Randall’s visit to Portland—he’ll be part of a showcase at Helium Comedy Club to benefit Wildcat Haven, an animal sanctuary in Sherwood—we asked him to give advice to fellow meme makers looking to extend their 15 minutes of Internet fame. LAURA HANSON.

Grumpy Cat


Ridiculously Photogenic Guy

Due to dwarfism, cat has puckered face. Looks displeased.

14-year-old girl sings about her typical Friday.

Runner looks good at end of race.

Randall says: “Don’t be afraid to smile, honey. I know the pressure is on to stay ‘grumpy,’ but even the grumpiest of grumps have to chuckle every now and then!”

Randall says: “Why stop at Friday? Ya gotta sing more songs about the other days of the week as well as months!”

Randall says: “You need to get in the ‘photos for photo frames’ business. Cereally, think of how many peeps will buy frames and just leave your photo in there!”

David After Dentist

Star Wars Kid

Bad Luck Brian

Child gets tooth removed. Has existential dilemma.

Teenager practices lightsaber skills with golf-ball retriever.

Seventh-grader takes unfortunate school photo.

Randall says: “We’re all waiting for David’s revenge! I suggest stacking things on Dad’s face when he passes out and filming it!”

Randall says: “The Force is strong with this one! Someone get this Jedi a baton and knee-high boots!”

Randall says: “Sometimes, crapping your pants can help build character. ‘Good luck’ is overrated, honey—don’t go changin’…unless it’s your pants!”

Charlie Bit My Finger

Overly Attached Girlfriend

Chubby Bubbles Girl

Young English boy puts finger in infant brother’s mouth. Infant chomps down.

Girl submits video for Justin Bieber parody contest. Sings about unhealthy relationship.

Chubby girl chases bubbles.

Randall says: “Never stop chomping on fingers! It’s the best way to keep those closest to you in check!”

Randall says: “You’re gonna make some lucky dude very happy one day. Until then, you should totes be cast in Misery: The Musical!”

Randall says: “You’ve lived through so much. Always on the run, always moving. I say, take time to walk—enjoy your surroundings.”

What Does the Fox Say?


Strutting Leo

Norwegian comedy duo makes music video about animal sounds.

Girl from the ’90s holds Goosebumps books in hands. Can barely contain excitement.

Attractive, well-known actor is happy at work.

Randall says: “I don’t know if we’ll ever figure out what the fox says. I’m still trying to understand the sloth!”

Randall says: “Dare I suggest you change your name to Ermah Gerd? I think it’d help launch your career, honey! I really do!”

Randall says: “Oh, Leo…are your feets tired? Cuz you’ve been running around on my computer all day, honey!”

I Like Turtles

Scumbag Steve

Success Kid/I Hate Sandcastles

Portland reporter asks face-painted child about his day at Waterfront Park. Boy responds with non sequitur.

Aspiring white rapper has mother take photo for album cover.

Young Patton Oswalt clutches fistful of sand.

Randall says: “The second you decide to be cool is the moment you lose the love and attention of many! Stay scummy, ya scumbag!”

Randall says: “What advice can you give a kid who has it all figured out?!”

Randall says: “Turtles are indeed amazing! But, honey, you need some rest and a snack!”

see it: Randall is at Helium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th Ave., 888-643-8669. 7 pm Sunday, April 27. $18-$23. 21+. Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014



april 23–29

= WW Pick. Highly recommended.


Most prices listed are for advance ticket sales. At-the-door increases and so-called convenience charges may apply, so it’s best to call ahead.


Editor: REBECCA JACOBSON. Theater: REBECCA JACOBSON ( Dance: AARON SPENCER ( TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit information at least two weeks in advance to:

the quality of life


The married co-founders of Portland Story Theater, Lynne Duddy and Lawrence Howard, present a two-night run of a show about how to make a long-term relationship succeed. Hipbone Studio, 1847 E Burnside St., 358-0898. 8 pm Friday-Saturday, April 25-26. $15.

At Home at the Zoo

After writing The Zoo Story in 1958, Edward Albee worried he had created a 1½-character play rather than a two-character one, with the voluble Jerry overshadowing the quiet Peter. Nearly 50 years later, Albee penned a new one-act, a sort of prologue to his earlier play, to flesh out Peter and to introduce his restless wife, Ann. Gorilla Bomb Productions presents this combined work. Shout House, 210 SE Madison St., Ste. 11. 7:30 pm FridaySunday, April 25-27; Thursday-Monday, May 1-5; and Thursday-Saturday, May 8-10. $10.

The Giver

Oregon Children’s Theatre premiered this adaptation of Lois Lowry’s seminal young-adult novel about a dystopian society back in 2006, and now the company brings it back for another run. Winningstad Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 228-9571. 2 and 5 pm Saturdays and 2 pm Sundays through May 18. $10-$28.

The Last Five Years

Talented locals Merideth Kaye Clark and Drew Harper star in this Portland Center Stage musical about two young New Yorkers who fall in love. In the show, they trace their stories in opposite directions: He tells it chronologically, while she lets it unfold backward.Gerding Theater, 128 NW 11th Ave., 445-3700. 7:30 pm TuesdaysSaturdays, 2 pm Saturdays-Sundays and noon Thursdays through June 22. $30-$60.

Little Red “Riding Hood”

In this doo-wop-inflected production at Northwest Children’s Theater, Little Red has been reimagined as a girl who dreams of racing cars. When she’s told that girls can’t take shop class, Grandma won’t have any of it. Best for kids 5 and up. NW Neighborhood Cultural Center, 1819 NW Everett St., 222-4480. Noon and 4 pm SaturdaysSundays and 7 pm some Fridays through May 26. $13-$22.

Pilot Season: Clubland

The last of Action/Adventure’s socalled “pilot episodes”—first installments of serialized comedies, one


of which will turn into a full production next season—centers on some friends who launch a music venue in Southeast Portland that doesn’t go exactly as planned. Action/Adventure Theatre, 1050 SE Clinton St. 10 pm Thursday-Saturday, April 24-26. $6-$10.

Pulp Gulp: Brave New Sci-Fi

Pulp Stage returns with another round of stripped-down readings of four plays, this time about aliens, robots and intergalactic truckers. Jack London Bar, 529 SW 4th Ave., 228-7605. 7:30 pm Thursday, April 24. $5-$10. 21+.

Violeta Went to Heaven

To finish up Chilean playwrightGuillermo Calderón’s visit to Oregon, Boom Arts presents a screening of the 2011 biopic about folk musician Violeta Parra. Calderón, who wrote the screenplay, will stick around for a Q&A. Reed College Performing Arts Building, SE 28th Ave. and Botsford Drive, 7777284. 7 pm Wednesday, April 23. Free.


A musical called The Bikinis about a ‘60s girl group reuniting as middleaged women might fill your mind with images of sagging bodies squeezed into skimpy two-pieces. But that isn’t what you’ll get in this Broadway Rose production. The musical, by Ray Roderick and James Hindman, centers on four bandmates as they reconvene at a benefit concert for their childhood beach resort, which a realestate mogul is threatening to buy up. It’s essentially a concert itself, with ‘50s-era trailers framing the stage and a white picket fence separating the performers from the live band. Though occasionally interrupted by the women’s chatter about adolescence on the Jersey shore—winning singing competitions, canoodling with dreamy lifeguards, fitting into tiny swimsuits—the plot is little more than a flimsy clothesline on which to hang peppy oldies, and it moves toward an unsatisfying, predictable conclusion. Still, the four stars turn in strong performances. Clad not in swimsuits but in black spandex and a rotating selection of period-appropriate costumes, they bring the audience up to speed on their lives post-girl group, from the Vietnam War to the disco era, marking each period with a song— think ”I’m Every Woman,” “These Boots Are Made for Walkin’” and “It’s Raining Men.” Though it touches on cultural upheaval, The Bikinis is mostly a lighthearted bauble, a brief escape to bygone summers on the shore. LAURA HANSON. Broadway Rose New Stage Theatre, 12850 SW Grant Ave., Tigard, 620-5262. 7:30 pm ThursdaysSaturdays and 2 pm SaturdaysSundays through May 18. $20-$38.

Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014


From the opening moments of Post5 Theatre’s abridged Hamlet, it’s evident this isn’t the version you saw in high school. King Claudius and Queen Gertrude resemble the picture-perfect parents from a ’50s sitcom, servants snap photos with smartphones, the guards carry guns, and Ty Boice as Hamlet swaggers into the room wearing sunglasses and a fancy suit, every bit as bitter and melancholy as you expect him to be—until he isn’t. With consistently swift line delivery, Boice’s Danish prince drips with sarcasm one second and flightiness the next, making Shakespeare’s tragedy come alive with unexpected comedy. From the exasperated “ugh” right before a sword fight to the singsong “goodnight, mother” as he drags a dead body out of the room, Boice brings a compelling duality to his character: His madness is razor-sharp, but also frightening in its unpredictability. Aided by an intimate set and a cast that plays up the humor—notably Jessica Tidd, who near matches Boice’s charisma as Ophelia—the production, under Paul Angelo’s direction, slowly regains its gravity as the tragedy unfolds. Yet it’s a heft lightened by laughter from a Hamlet who’s both fun and scary to watch. But mostly fun. KAITIE TODD. Milepost 5, 850 NE 81st Ave., 729-3223. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Sundays through May 4. $15; Thursdays “pay what you will.”

Opus 3

The opening of Opus 3, a production of students at Portland Actors Conservatory under the guidance of Portland Experimental Theatre Ensemble, gives the distinct sense of arriving too early to a really weird party. I don’t think I’d really want to attend a party based, as Opus 3 is, on August Strindberg’s gothic and haunting play The Ghost Sonata. Two women (J’ena SanCartier and Sarah Yeakel) gaze with thousandyard stares and fidget with their frilly dresses as dripping water keeps time. A conductor figure (Alwynn Accuardi) loudly decries things she hates— steamed vegetables, for one. If this were a party, I’d leave my drink at the nearest exit, but as theater, it’s compelling if a little desperate. That is, until the energetic Emily Elizabeth Welch and Matthew M. Ostrowski walk down the runway, dressed, respectively, as a Cossack and a frumpy grandmother. Their passive-aggressive bickering—always with an odd pet name like “my bird of prey” or “turnip” screamed after each strained phrase— lends the production some muchneeded humor on loan from Monty Python’s Pepperpots and Roxanne. I may have been too struck with the giggles to pick up on all Opus 3 had to say about relationships and communication, but that’s all right: I’m loving this weird party. MITCH LILLIE. Portland Actors Conservatory, 1436 SW Montgomery St., 274-1717. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Saturdays and 2 pm Sundays through April 27. $5-$25.


Othello can be a bit of a tough sell. Not only is it one of Shakespeare’s most racially insensitive plays (and that’s saying something), but even the most credulous audience member might wonder why the title character, a warrior with a reputation for bravery and a Moor known for his passion can be so easily persuaded to think the worst of his great love. The key to our willingness to suspend disbelief is Iago, whose cunning not only dissolves Othello and Desdemona’s devotion but nearly succeeds in toppling an entire kingdom. This performance can make or break the show, and fortunately for this Portland Center Stage production, Gavin Hoffman’s nuanced portrayal of Othello’s BFF/ enemy-in-disguise has the stroke of genius about it. The same can be said of Dana Green’s turn as Iago’s wife, Emilia. It’s a small role but an essential one, and in Green’s hands, the scene in which Emilia and Desdemona lament a woman’s lot (to love, cherish, sacrifice and suffer) is both poignant and edifying. The players get help from

Scoff Fyfe’s gorgeous, rotating set and Susan E. Mickey’s sumptuous costumes. This production, helmed by PCS artistic director Chris Coleman, doesn’t attempt anything radical—it’s Shakespeare at its most traditional, but that also makes it a perfect start to the Complete Works Project, a two-year initiative during which several Portland cultural institutions will attempt to stage the Bard’s full 37-play catalog. If Shakespeare be the food of love, play on. REBECCA JACOBSON. Gerding Theater, 128 NW 11th Ave., 445-3700. 7:30 pm Tuesdays-Sundays; 2 pm Saturdays-Sundays; noon Thursdays through May 11. $38-$72.


Like the Justice League meets The Office, Sidekicks imagines the everyday drudgery of being a superhero— and the particular travails of playing second fiddle to the big shots. Set in a land called New Cascadia, evoked by drawings of a lumpy Portlandia statue and a wonky-looking Hawthorne Bridge, these superheroes have had it easy recently. Sure, Vitality’s bar Dig a Power might be losing money, and the coffee mugs might be piling up in the office sink, but things have been fairly villain-free…until the evil Influencer and the Technolord hijack a pirated TV signal and inform the city of their evil plans. Action/Adventure Theatre has made its name on semiscripted serial comedies (Fall of the House, Captured by Aliens, Fall of the Band) that unfold over several weeks, and much of Sidekicks proves why this scrappy troupe manages to sell out shows. Co-directors Pat Moran and Noah Dunham keep the action moving at a brisk clip, and the cast has energy and spunk: Katie Michels makes a great flying-squirrel wannabe, all stubbornly scrunched face and daffy delivery, and Nate Ayling has a bro-tastic turn as a clone who’s been programmed to party, rattling his body in unison with his cocktail shaker. But the ad-libbing, at least on April 5, was hit-or-miss, and opportunities for humor—particularly chances to jab at Portland or workplace dynamics—slipped by. For all their stage time, the superheroes weren’t as funny as their underlings. This mission might best be left to the lackeys. REBECCA JACOBSON. Action/Adventure Theatre, 1050 SE Clinton St. 8 pm Thursdays-Sundays through April 27. $10-$15; Thursdays “pay what you will.”

The Quality of Life

“I need a cookie,” someone in the audience sighed as the lights came up during intermission on the opening weekend of Artist Repertory Theatre’s The Quality of Life. Little did she know that the second half would double down on that need for something simple and sugary. On the surface, Jane Anderson’s play sounds simple: Two married couples deal with different stages of grief and vastly different spiritual beliefs over the course of a day together. Dinah and Bill, an Ohio couple with a strained relationship, are mourning the murder of their only child by knitting, crafting and going to work and to church—anything to keep moving. They’re visiting Jeannette and Neil, free-spirited soulmates living in a yurt in California, who are more apt to point out their recycled decorations or say “Namaste, baby” than to dwell on the fact that Neil has terminal cancer and their house burned down in a wildfire. Predictably, these styles of grieving clash, spurring very real and poignant conversations about life and death and what might come afterward. Despite the weighty themes, the performance, directed by Allen Nause, is sprinkled with lighthearted moments. That’s mostly thanks to the wonderful cast—one moment filled with dry humor and the next raging (or sobbing) at the thought of living without a loved one. The bubble bursts as the characters— and audience—realize that this is life: learning to let go of heartbreak, or learning to embrace it. And you know what? Maybe we all need a cookie sometimes. KAITIE TODD. Artists Repertory Theatre, 1515 SW Morrison St., 241-1278. 7:30 pm Wednesdays-Sundays and 2 pm Sundays through May 11. $25-$55.

pool (no water)

Say a man dies of AIDS. Now say a friend collects his blood and ban-

dages and condoms and catheters and makes them into art. Has this artist crossed the line between creation and exploitation? In friendship, there’s a similarly delicate line between amity and antagonism. And when these lines intersect in Mark Ravenhill’s pool (no water), it’s downright combustible. Ravenhill’s 2006 play, presented by Theatre Vertigo in a striking if occasionally shaky production, is written as a collective monologue, and these seven actors deliver some lines singly and others in unison in a propulsive, pitter-patter style that’s like slam poetry with a malevolent bite. All bohemian artists, they’ve gathered at the posh digs of a friend who’s made it big—thanks to that aforementioned AIDS art. But then a freak accident lands the successful artist in a coma, her body a mangled canvas of ghastly bruises, and the others begin photographing her wounds. As if armed with an automatic rifle, Ravenhill takes aim at the modern urge to document everything and our instinct to pervert tragedy for our own creative ends. It’s a lot for a 70-minute oneact, but these actors throw themselves at it. Sometimes literally—it’s a highly physical production punctuated by spasms of abstract movement. The choreography is a mixed bag: The flurry of photography in the hospital room is awkward, while a joylessly frenzied coke-and-sex binge strikes at our twisted reactions to grief. As for the performers, a few— such as Stephanie Cordell as a fieryeyed hellion oozing dangerous sexual energy—commit fully, while others waver. But in the moments when this group comes together, like a diabolical Greek chorus, this is a satisfying deep-end dive into a stew of adrenaline, narcissism and shame. REBECCA JACOBSON. Shoebox Theater, 2110 SE 10th Ave., 306-0870. 7:30 pm Thursdays-Saturdays and 2 pm Sundays through May 10. $20.


The Aces, a sketch-comedy duo comprising Shelley McLendon and Michael Fetters, are aptly named: They’re damn good at what they do, and they’re back with a new show running for three weeks. Interstate Firehouse Cultural Center, 5340 N Interstate Ave., 306-5217. 8 pm FridaysSaturdays through May 3. $15.

Bri Pruett Live Album Taping

Clackamas-born funny lady Bri Pruett—whose jokes about genital muffin tops and the Trail Blazers (if you pretend the ball doesn’t exist, the team “looks like a bunch of hot, sweaty bros who are deeply concerned about each other”) earned her a spot on WW’s Funniest 5 list last November—records her first comedy album. She’ll be joined by Alex Falcone and Anthony Lopez. Action/ Adventure Theatre, 1050 SE Clinton St., 7:30 and 9:30 pm Monday, April 28. $7-$10.

Chase & Stacey: Joyride

Curious Comedy artistic director Stacey Hallal teams up with ace solo performer Chase Padgett for a musical-comedy extravaganza they claim melds Reggie Watts with I Love Lucy. Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-9477. 8 pm Fridays-Saturdays through May 2. $12-$15.

Chuck Roy

This proud Southern bear with a raunchy sense of humor films a standup special. Alberta Rose Theatre, 3000 NE Alberta St., 7196055. 7 pm Sunday, April 27. $12$20. 21+.

College Humor Live

Jake Hurwitz, Amir Blumenfeld and Streeter Seidell, well-known for listicles about sandwiches and flow charts about whether you should send that dick pic, put on a live comedy show. Hawthorne Theatre, 1507 SE 39th Ave., 233-7100. 8 pm Friday, April 25. $10-$20.

april 23–29

April 23-26. $30-$37. 21+.

A Salute to Late-Night with Aaron Ross

Aaron Ross—perhaps better known as his libidinous, boozy alter ego Ed Forman—puts away the polyester for a month of shows dedicated to the titans of late-night TV. Each week moves through the decades, from Carson and Letterman up to Stewart and Colbert, with new guests each show. Check for details. Dante’s, 350 W Burnside St., 226-6630. 10 pm Tuesdays through April 29. $3.

You Are Here

The Brody ensemble presents a weekly improv showcase. Brody Theater, 16 NW Broadway, 224-2227. 7:30 pm every Friday. $12.

DANCE Cirque du Soleil



Family-friendly competitive improv comedy. ComedySportz, 1963 NW Kearney St., 236-8888. 8 pm FridaysSaturdays. $15.

Curious Comedy Open Mic

Gabe Dinger hosts a weekly openmic night. Sign-ups begin at 7:15, and comics get three minutes of stage time apiece. Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-9477. 8 pm every Sunday. Free.

David Alan Grier

From his Shakespeare training at Yale to In Living Color, the preternaturally calm, multitalented Grier blends personal anecdotes and finely crafted jokes to masterful effect. Crystal Ballroom, 1332 W Burnside St., 2250047. 8 pm Friday, April 25. $25-$27. 21+.

Diabolical Experiments

Improv jam show featuring Brody performers and other local improvisers. Brody Theater, 16 NW Broadway, 2242227. 7 pm every Sunday. $5.

Empire High

In what sounds to us like Star Wars meets Degrassi, the folks at Funhouse Lounge present an unscripted, episodic show that imagines Han Solo, Leia and Luke as hormonal teenagers trying to navigate the challenges of high school. With Vice Principal Vader and Obi-Wan Custodian. Funhouse Lounge, 2432 SE 11th Ave., 841-6734. 7 pm Fridays-Saturdays through April 26. $10.

Firkin Funny Night

Andrew Dhulst hosts headliner Rico Starr at this monthly comedy showcase, which is also celebrating its second anniversary. Music by Mack & Dub and the Smokin’ Section follows. The Firkin Tavern, 1937 SE 11th Ave., 206-7552. 9 pm Tuesday, April 29. Free. 21+.

Flash Ah-AHHH!

A rollicking schlock-operetta, StageWorks Ink’s Flash Ah-AHHH! pays faithful tribute to 1980 camp classic Flash Gordon—and takes it a step further by shoehorning a dozen Queen classics into the show alongside the titular smash song. While the troupe’s Varsity Cheerleader Werewolves LIVE From Outer Space and The Adventures of Dex Dixon: Paranormal Dick veered toward extended improv skit or burlesque pastiche, this latest spoof embraces B-movie grandeur through music hall ebullience and tent-revival triumphalism. Between the daft iconography, the “he’ll save every one of us” tropes, and the hint of the devotional in every Freddie Mercury impres-

sion, the effect is something like a Godspell panto dreamt up in a church basement by an assemblage of boozy dramatists and the neighborhood kids they’ve press-ganged into service as a live band. Among the cast, Tasha Danner is an incandescent Dale Arden, Jake Sauvageau imagines Dr. Zarkov through an Iron&Wine prism, Jonathan Hall sneers droll menace as Ming the Merciless, and StageWorks mainstay Steve Coker treats Vultan’s Falstaffian swagger with a nimble touch. Well aware the lunatic source material needs no elaboration, the performers invest themselves in rousing renditions that manage to underplay the original’s hamminess while spotlighting quieter amusements, such as flight attendants incorporating safety demonstrations into their choreography, loungey nods to “Under Pressure” and Ming’s serpentine lick of a weaponized Ring Pop. Gordon has risen indeed. JAY HORTON. Star Theater, 13 NW 6th Ave., 248-4700. 8 pm Friday, April 25. $18-$20.

The Grrrl Front

Launched last year, the feminist festival returns with two days of live music and comedy, with proceeds to benefit Bitch Media. On Friday, catch standup sets from Kristine Levine, Crystal Davis and Barbara Holm. On Saturday, Katie Nguyen, Whitney Streed, Stephanie Purtle and Caitlin Weierhauser take the mic. for music schedule. Tonic Lounge, 3100 NE Sandy Blvd., 238-0543. 9 pm Friday-Saturday, April 25-26. $8.

Jordan, Jesse, Go! Live!

Bullseye’s Jesse Thorn and Jordan Morris of Fuel TV join forces for a live taping of the popular comedy podcast, which features interviews with guests about sex, feelings, growing up and whatever else crosses their minds. Audience contributions encouraged. Mission Theater and Pub, 1624 NW Glisan St., 223-4527. 8 pm Friday, April 25. $15-$20. 21+.


Late-night comedy show with improv, sketch and standup. Curious Comedy, 5225 NE Martin Luther King Jr. Blvd., 477-9477. 10 pm every Saturday. $5.

Naked Comedy Open Mic

The Brody hosts a twice-weekly openmic night. Comics get four-minute standup slots and can sign up online. Brody Theater, 16 NW Broadway, 2242227. 9:30 pm every Wednesday and Thursday. Free with one-item minimum purchase.

Norm MacDonald

The clever, profane and ever-affable Canadian comedian—and the best Weekend Update anchor that Saturday

Given all the masks, you might expect some overlap in the cast of Cirque Du Soleil’s Totem, now playing inside a massive blue and yellow tent—pardon, chapiteau—outside the Expo Center. Then, after two and a half hours of humans doing things it seems humans should not be capable of doing, comes the casting call. Turns out, all those creatures are highly adapted. The glowing frog people jumping on trampolines inside a structure that looks like the sun-bleached rib cage of some long-extinct species of megafauna? They do not also play the Martian people who wear costumes that look like blacklighted Persian rugs and hop between flexible beam things, nor the ladies on towering unicycles who catch bowls on their heads. And, obviously, there’s no overlap between the hoop-dancing indigenous Americans or the juggling Abe Lincoln. That makes sense, I suppose, given the difficulty of every stunt in this extravagant production. Still, it’s tough to picture until you see the whole ecosystem take a bow. MARTIN CIZMAR. Portland Expo Center, 2060 N Marine Dr., 736-5200. 7:30 pm Thursdays; 4:30 and 8 pm Fridays-Saturdays and 1 and 4:30 pm Sundays through May 4. $40-$135.

pillows, play out a morning-after scene. Pianist Kevin Hardy rolls in between acts with an electronic keyboard and a toy piano. In addition to ballads and original songs, he pairs classic works with pop lyrics. Von Pavonine also promises a “metric fuck ton of confetti.” Crush, 1400 SE Morrison St, 2358150. 7 pm Saturday, April 26 and 8:30 pm Friday, May 2. $12 in advance, $15 at the door, $65-$80 tables. 21+.

Pendulum Aerial Arts

Kids and their phones these days. The youth troupe of Pendulum Aerial Arts tries to stay grounded in a world of technology—while also swinging from the ceiling. Some of the performers in this group, ages 12 to 18, have been training with Pendulum for five years. In vibrant costumes, they’ll execute their aerial and acrobat moves in front of a video projection of their interviews, discussing their relationships with technology, their goals and their futures. The show, Dawn: A New Beginning, is an update of 2008’s Dawn, set on similar themes—but this version has parallax. French American International School, 8500 NW Johnson St. 7:30 pm Saturday, April 26 and 2 pm Sunday, April 27. $10-$15.

School of Oregon Ballet Theatre

Retiring principal dancer Alison Roper says Oregon Ballet Theatre’s new school director, Anthony Jones, is one of the best teachers she’s ever had. That endorsement bodes well for the School of OBT’s annual performance, this time including the second act of Swan Lake. Before Roper takes her final bows Saturday evening (see listing for OBT), the school of young dancers will take on the Dance of the Little Swans. Elsewhere in the program, dancers perform George Balanchine’s Valse Fantaisie and August Bournonville’s pas de deux from Flower Festival in

Genzano. No swan song here, though. These dancers are just getting started. Newmark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 248-4335. 1 pm Saturday-Sunday, April 26-27. $32-$42.

Skinner/Kirk Dance Ensemble

Daniel Kirk and Eric Skinner are consistently the best parts of BodyVox performances. They mix athleticism and skill, as in their daring aerial feats, with only a touch of gimmickry—props like tires or moving dollies. Their offshoot project, Skinner/Kirk, now a 12-year-old partnership, highlights their innovative style of performance. In this program, Skinner performs Within the Lines, a piece about tension, perspective and space, as seen through windows. BodyVox Dance Center, 1201 NW 17th Ave., 229-0627. 7:30 pm ThursdaysSaturdays, April 17-26. $25-$59.

Sky Club Burlesquers

Normally the ambient background of Old Town’s party scene, the circus and burlesque group gets more creative in its monthly shows. This month’s theme: sci-fi. Set to a background of fog and lasers, Charity Marchandt, a trained opera singer, sings “The Diva Dance” from The Fifth Element. Orchid Souris Rouge, a big Star Wars fan, dons space regalia as she spins in lycra, hanging from the renovated ceiling of Ankeny’s Well. Other acts include Johnny Nuriel, who spins LEDs to electronica, and Layne Fox, a burlesque performer and prolific costumer. A lot of bar acts are darker than this, catering to the neocircus goth crowd. This group keeps it PG-13, so not more risqué than tasselcovered boobs. Sky Club at Ankeny’s Well, 50 SW 3rd Ave., 223-1375. 10 pm Friday, April 25. $3. 21+.

For more Performance listings, visit



Night Live has ever known—returns to Helium for a four-night stand. Helium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th Ave., 888643-8669. 8 pm Wednesday-Thursday and 7:30 and 10 pm Friday-Saturday,


Flora vs. Fauna

Belly dance versus burlesque. Flora versus fauna. Who says they shouldn’t be able to live in harmony? The performers in this set are actually a little bi-curious when it comes to the two dance forms, so expect a lot of blending. Endymienne leads the bellydance pack, while the Infamous Nina Nightshade represents for the burlesquers. The rest—Erika Ryn, Jasmine Rain, Johnny Nuriel—could go either way. The Analog, 720 SE Hawthorne, 432-8079. 7:30 and 11 pm Saturday, April 26. $12 in advance, $15 at the door. 21+.

I’ve Got a Golden Tassel

It’s Willy Wonka for adults, and there’s no earthly way of knowing where it will go—but probably tassels. The cast includes Honey LeFleur as Mrs. Gloop, Wanda Bones as the bratty Veruca Salt, Judy Patootie as Violet Beauregard and Tod Alan as Mike Teavee. Ivanna Mandalay does a burlesque bubble interpretation of the Fizzy Lifting Drink, and Scarlet Thrustmore takes on Willy Wonka, albeit a racier version. With good striptease, the suspense is terrible, but you hope it’ll last. Star Theater, 13 NW 6th Ave. 7 pm Sunday, April 27. $12, $15 VIP, $50 table. 21+.

Pardon My Fringe: Burlesque as Fuck

Burlesque group the Fringe Benefits debuts new pieces in a show of extreme vice. The performers —Angelique DeVil, Babs Jamboree, Claire Voltaire, Lily Le Fauve and Zora Von Pavonine—want to push the limits of decency, demonstrating that a little intensity isn’t a bad thing. Among the acts, a band of sideshow circus freaks transforms an unwitting visitor. And performers, armed with bedsheets and

THE LAST DANCE: Oregon’s premier ballet company is losing its premier ballerina. Alison Roper, after 18 seasons with Oregon Ballet Theatre, is retiring, performing for the final time this weekend. In this Celebrate program, she dances the company premiere of Nacho Duato’s Cor Perdut, a dynamic pas de deux set to a lushly syncopated Turkish score sung by Catalan vocalist Maria del Mar Bonet. Young company member Jordan Kindell proves he has the chops to partner with someone of Roper’s athleticism and sensitivity, and the two shape their bodies into ornate postures—backs arched forward, arms scooping up air—and move with carefree joy. The company also performs Petal, a vivacious and colorful piece by Helen Pickett that’s like a court dance-cum-iPod commercial, and The Lost Dance, a contemporary piece with an edge that Matjash Mrozewski set on OBT in 2012. With the men in slender slacks and shirts that miraculously never come untucked, and the women in long, backless gowns, The Lost Dance bends back and forth between soulful electronica and a trance-party vibe. The dancers move with sex as their motivation, often crawling, often challenging each other with domineering postures. Roper, to no surprise, pops up again at the end of the evening. On that note, bring roses: You get to throw them as she takes her final bows. AARON SPENCER. SEE IT: Oregon Ballet Theatre is at the Newmark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, 222-5538. 7:30 pm Thursday-Saturday, April 24-26. 25-$142. Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014



april 23–29

= WW Pick. Highly recommended. By RichaRd SpeeR. TO Be cONSideRed FOR LiSTiNGS, submit show information—including opening and closing dates, gallery address and phone number—at least two weeks in advance to: Visual arts, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., portland, OR 97210. email:

whose pattern-based oil paintings follow in the lineage of Op art. But she’s also accomplished in collage work. Viewers may remember her Targets series, which paid homage to Greta Garbo, carole Lombard, ann-Margret and other hollywood femmes fatales. For her new body of work, Anonymous Women, she incorporates imagery of not-so-famous women, culled from fashion magazines and other sources. The show promises to offer a thought-provoking look at the idea of anonymity and the beauty industry. Through April 26. Augen DeSoto, 716 NW Davis St., 224-8182.

Gary Boswell

Gary Boswell’s Chimera series of photo collages offer a case study in why collages are so often trite. he puts together cut-out flowers, birds and figures in compositions that are arbitrary and facile. happily, his series of automatic (meaning “from the unconscious”) paintings, Becoming Visible, offers considerably more interest. The black-and-white images are most compelling, with seeping, dripping contours that activate the viewer’s imagination. They seem to be channeling asian landscape painting, with forms suggestive of mountains, cliffs and valleys. Through April 27. Nine Gallery, 122 NW 8th Ave., 503-227-7114.

Jeffrey Sarmiento: Constructions Cielo by tamara englisH

Being Blackfish: An Exhibit of 30 Current Artist Members

The artist collective known as Blackfish has been throwing itself a well-deserved 35th anniversary party the last couple of months. The celebration’s first iteration featured artwork by the collective’s founders. For april, the focus shifts to current Blackfish members, some of whom have been with the collective since the beginning, many of whom are more recent additions. a total of 30 artists, among them Stephan Soihl and ellen Goldschmidt, contribute work across a broad gamut of media and styles. although quality varies wildly from artist to artist, show to show, there is something to be said for three-and-a-half decades of endurance in a city where worthy galleries and nonprofits have the lifespans of fruit flies. Through April 26. Blackfish Gallery, 420 NW 9th Ave., 234-2634.

Bryan Schutmaat: Grays the Mountain Sends

it’s easy to romanticize small-town life and bucolic mountains if you’re an overworked, under-natured city dweller. But photographer Bryan Schutmaat captures something less romantic, more complex in his images of hardscrabble mining towns

throughout the american West. Not all of these landscapes are beautiful; some are despoiled by clear-cutting, garbage dumps, and the kinds of houses that have 10 cars and trucks up on cinder blocks. The grizzled habitués of these places stare at Schutmaat’s lens with an inscrutable blend of pride, weariness and deep distrust of strangers. Through April 27. Newspace Center for Photography, 1632 SE 10th Ave., 963-1935.

Dave Heath: A Dialogue With Solitude

a historically important photographer since the late 1940s, dave heath takes pictures that blend fine-art and photojournalistic sensibilities. This show, A Dialogue With Solitude, features haunting blackand-white works: portraits, vignettes from the Korean War, and a misty landscape called Culpeper, Virginia, Spring, in which a dog sits on a treedotted field, as if waiting for his master to come home. There are also moving images from the civil-rights movement of the 1960s. Nearly every photograph weaves a highly compacted narrative, full of emotion and pathos. Through April 26. Charles A. Hartman Fine Art, 134 NW 8th Ave., 287-3886.

Eva Lake: Anonymous Women

eva Lake is a gifted abstract artist



FREE! Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014

Jeffrey Sarmiento’s virtuosic Constructions fills Bullseye’s front exhibition space with an ambitious array of pieces spanning a gamut of media. The most jaw-dropping of these is Beautiful Flaws, a 9-foottall sculpture made of steel, aluminum and glass. each pane of glass is flawed in some way and would ordinarily have been discarded, but Sarmiento turns trash into the proverbial treasure, essentially elevating the panes on pedestals, hoisting aloft what others would have cast away. it’s an artistic statement that verges on the ethical and metaphysical. and it makes you say, “Wow.” Through May 3. Bullseye Gallery, 300 NW 13th Ave., 227-0222.

Laurie Danial: Dead Reckoning

The color palette in Laurie danial’s exhibition, Dead Reckoning, swings between earth tones, pastels and aquas. The most charming of these works is called Spring Arrived Late This Year. it’s a semi-abstract composition depicting what appears to be a tree comprised of myriad green hues, reflected on the surface of a lake. This imagery is counterposed against sinuous outlines of cloud forms in luscious pinks. The surface is creamy, the total effect dreamlike and whimsical. Through April 26. Froelick Gallery, 714 NW Davis St., 222-1142.

Mary Josephson: Character

Viewers familiar with Mary Josephson’s oil paintings in the style of eccentric figuration will

be surprised at the new medium she’s debuting in her april show, Character. She’s combining watercolors, recycled printer’s felt and embroidery, and the results are weirdly beautiful. These works are much less pictorially dense than her oil paintings, making inventive use of negative space. There’s a connect-the-dots feel as the embroidery thread weaves above and below the picture plane. This is a novel effect, but more importantly, it’s an effect that works graphically. Kudos to this established Northwest artist for adding a new arrow to her stylistic quiver. Through April 26. Laura Russo Gallery, 805 NW 21st Ave., 226-2754.

Oregon Art Beat Exhibition: Celebrating 15 Years of Creativity on OPB

at a time when reality TV reigns and viewers are deserting television in droves for the internet, you have to give props to a TV show devoted to the old-fashioned mission of profiling local and regional artists. That being said, Oregon Art Beat is a cringe-inducing show that manages to make even the most inspired artists come across as corny, pabulum-spouting wankers. With its outdated set and production values, Art Beat homogenizes artists by reducing their unique practices into pat featurettes, heavy on clueless voiceovers by the show’s correspondents and an intrusively saccharine soundtrack. Now the show is sponsoring an exhibition at Mark Woolley and people’s art of portland, showcasing work by hundreds of artists subjected to the program’s icky formula over the past 15 years. Much of the artwork itself is sublime. Too bad the show’s producers can’t find a way to translate the creative impulse into anything other than patronizing New-age drivel. Through June 15. Mark Woolley Gallery @ Pioneer, 700 SW 5th Ave., third floor, Pioneer Place Mall, 998-4152.

Patricia Galagan: Objects of Desire

The conceit is simple, if hardly original: have someone pose for a photograph holding or standing beside something they cherish. patricia Galagan asked people to do this when she visited cuba, and the resulting photos make up the body of work in Objects of Desire. a print entitled Odalisque shows a woman reclining beneath a prized painting; the butcher in This Knife proudly brandishes the instrument of his livelihood; and Waiting for Mia shows a woman clutching her pregnant belly. all of this would be fine enough if it weren’t for Galagan’s misguided attempt to frame the series as cultural commentary. “in america,” she asserts in her artist statement, “many people define themselves by their possessions. in cuba, the opposite is true.” and so the Santa Fe, New Mexico-based Galagan, having moonlighted as an outside observer in cuba, has decided that the cuban people are big-souled naifs who value simple things like paintings,

tools and gestating babies, while their neighbors to the north are crass materialists who cling to ipads, designer jeans and fancy cars. There may be some truth in this, but the photographer’s attempt to universalize winds up as a Gauguin-worthy exercise in neocolonialist condescension. Through April 27. Blue Sky Gallery, 122 NW 8th Ave., 225-0210.

Shane McAdams: Scorched Earth

Talk about unconventional painting methods! Shane Mcadams paints on blowtorched styrofoam, a medium that we’re pretty sure isn’t taught in most art schools. But the results are as cool as his blowtorch is hot: scarred, warped surfaces on which the Brooklyn, N.Y., artist has superimposed eerie landscapes, sprawling, bacteriumlike framing devices, and ironically cheerful rainbow stripes. The imagery is inspired by Mcadams’ childhood in the american Southwest and his concerns about the environment. Scorched Earth is a wry, sly, spooky show. Through April 26. Elizabeth Leach Gallery, 417 NW 9th Ave., 224-0521.

Tamara English: The Worlds Are Glorious

Over the past decade, painter Tamara english has charted a course from sumptuous landscapes, rife with tangled vines and flowers, to mystical semi-abstract iconography to an inspired commingling of the two. in her first showing with Nisus Gallery, she displays her gift for naturalistic color and intuitive composition. Works such as Fortitude feature a mysterious symmetrical motif rising like a fountain above a forest floor. in Shimmering, english exploits the rhythm of vertical drips that pour down like streaking rain. These elements—the symbolic and the painterly—combine in the vibrant work titled Praising, which manages somehow to seem playful and profound at the same time. Through April 27. Nisus Gallery, 8371 N Interstate Ave., No. 1, 806-1427.

Ted McCann: Green Illume

There’s a sense of abstracted trompe l’oeil in Ted Mccann’s illusionistic mixed-media paintings and sculptures. You could swear Adrift was made out of giant chunks of turquoise, but the material is actually painted plastic foam. and his Aramid looks like a painting on canvas, but in fact it’s Kevlar, a material used to make body armor. The painting is in the overall shape of a square, with a torsolike form set within. With its two interrelated shades of yellow, it has a formalist rigor that contrasts with the bulletproof-vest material— think Josef albers crossed with G.i. Joe. Through April 26. Hap Gallery, 916 NW Flanders St., 444-7101.

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APRIL 23–29

= WW Pick. Highly recommended. By PENELOPE BASS. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, submit lecture or reading information at least two weeks in advance to: WORDS, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: Fax: 243-1115.

THURSDAY, APRIL 24 Dan Berne and Rob Yardumian

In Dan Berne’s Gods of Second Chances, a widowed Alaskan fisherman struggles to raise his granddaughter after his estranged daughter returns from prison. In Rob Yardumian’s debut novel, The Sound of Songs Across the Water, a washed-up musician reunites with an old bandmate to record a new album but finds that old clashes rise to the surface. Both authors will read from their newly published novels that explore conflict, trust and our own fallibility. Broadway Books, 1714 NE Broadway, 284-1726. 7 pm. Free.


Once again excelling at bringing together a group of interesting and talented people, the Live Wire radio variety show will host best-selling author and cultural commentator Barbara Ehrenreich (Nickel and Dimed, Bright-Sided ); Jeopardy! champ, author and cyborg Ken Jennings; music group the Minus 5 (with Scott McCaughey and former R.E.M. guitarist Peter Buck); and Portland pop-choral band Ages and Ages. Alberta Rose Theatre, 3000 NE Alberta St., 7196055. 7:30 pm. $20 advance, $25 day of show. 21+.

Christopher Moore

New York Times best-selling author, humorist and connoisseur of the absurd Christopher Moore once again riff s on Shakespeare with his 14th and newest novel, The Serpent of Venice. Reprising some of his classic characters such as Pocket the Fool and his sidekick, Drool, Moore spins a tale of deception, lust, greed and, of course, a sea monster. Powell’s Books at Cedar Hills Crossing, 3415 SW Cedar Hills Blvd., Beaverton, 228-4651. 2 pm. Free.


Occasional reading series Lye:Words will coalesce with a trio of authors sharing their work, including Rauan Klassnik (Sky Rat), Jay Ponteri (Wedlocked ) and Kevin Sampsell (This Is Between Us). Pond Gallery, 920 W. Burnside St. 7 pm. Donations accepted.

River City Book Release

What better place to host a release party for a book about river patrol than on a boat? Doc Macomber’s newest mystery novel, River City, follows the adventures of the Multnomah County River Patrol on the hunt for a serial killer. Joining Macomber aboard the Portland Spirit will be poet and essayist Judith Arcana and tattoo artist Levi Greenacres, whose new children’s book is Mommy’s New Tattoo. Portland Spirit, Southwest Naito Parkway and Salmon Street, 2243900. 1 pm, 2-5 pm boat ride. Free.

A Reading

Celebrating contemporary poetry and literature, Bay Area poets Alexandra Naughton (I Will Always Be Your Whore: Love Songs for Billy Corgan), Jesse Prado and Jesse Law will share their work along with locals a.m. O’Malley and Sean Aaron Bowers (aka Johnny No Bueno). Valentines, 232 SW Ankeny St., 248-1600. 5-8 pm. Free.

TUESDAY, APRIL 29 The Alchemy of Poetry

In case you didn’t know, April is

National Poetry Month. You can celebrate by crafting all of your texts in iambic pentameter, or you could just catch some great local poetry. Sage Cohen, Sara Guest, Christopher Luna, John Morrison, Toni Partington and Penelope Scambly Schott will all be sharing poems they’ve written and the poems that have changed them. An open mic will follow. Another Read Through Books, 3932 N Mississippi, 208-2729. 7 pm. Free.


Like a poetic interpretation of a Step Up dance-off, the third annual Verselandia poetry slam hosted by Literary Arts will feature the top two slam poets from 10 local high schools. Each will compete for five prizes and, of course, the glory. Prepare to get served. Gerding Theater, 128 NW 11th Ave., 4453700. 7-9 pm. $10.

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CHARLES R. CROSS, HERE WE ARE NOW In the 20 years since Kurt Cobain took his own life…an unbearable number of people (about 2 million, according to Google) have headed think pieces about the addled rock star’s legacy with some derivation of that phrase. That’s the problem for journalists tasked with coming up with new perspectives on the brief, Drawn into your magnet sensational history of the most tar-pit trap. important musical event of the ’90s. With no stones left to unturn, we feel like everyone knows everything. The lack of new information can stoke creative perspectives, though, and Charles R. Cross’ new book, Here We Are Now (HarperCollins, 192 pages, $22.99), has a few worth considering. On the day Cobain’s body was found in the greenhouse of his Seattle mansion, Cross was managing editor of the now-defunct Seattle newspaper The Rocket. As rumors of Cobain’s death solidified into fact, Cross became de facto press secretary for an event he spends the book unpacking as “the most famous suicide of the past two decades.” When a cold call from Larry King sneaks past his secretary amid the chaos and confusion, Cross is forced to contextualize the death of Cobain on the spot. “Tell me, Mr. Cross,” King says. “Why did Kurt Cobain matter?” The impact of Cobain’s songwriting makes for an auspicious first chapter, but you may throw up in your mouth when Cross starts name-checking butt-rock staples like Creed, Three Days Grace, and Evanescence as trenchant evidence of quiet-loud dynamics’ lasting impact on modern “alternative” music. Rather than justify the existence of Candlebox, however, he hangs a sharp left and ventures into uncharted territory: the adoration of Cobain within the rap community. Cross says hip-hop artists see a kindred soul in Cobain’s anguished, misunderstood pariah persona. “Kurt died young and is seen as a martyr in the hip-hop community,” Cross writes. “In a culture where premature, violent death is a dominant theme, Kurt fits in thematically.” Cross spills more ink over the waves Cobain sent through pop culture in areas such as fashion, drug addiction, and the way society approaches the topic of suicide. Cross argues that the net effect turned out to be positive: “The attention and circumstances of Kurt’s death may have actually encouraged people to seek help: research concluded that Kurt’s death statistically decreased suicides among Nirvana fans in the period studied. In some strange way, Kurt dying may have saved lives.” Stacked against the piles of other books on the topic, the brevity of Here We Are Now is both it’s greatest feat and most glaring weakness. It reads much like a CliffsNotes version of the Nirvana story for a tl;dr generation. For those who comb this quick read in search of meaning in their own lives, getting closer to the ghost of St. Kurt is not an expected outcome. It explains why your cousin in Minnesota wears flannel and listens to rappers that sample “Lithium,” but you may have to dig deeper for something that resonates on an emotional level. PETE COTTELL. GO: Charles R. Cross reads at Powell’s City of Books, 1005 W Burnside St., on Monday, April 28. 7:30 pm. Free.

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MOVIES FEATURE Courtesy oregon historiCal soCiety


A century ago, Portland faced a terrible scourge. The city’s newsboys were corrupting the city’s moral fiber. These inveterate ruffians, who numbered in the hundreds, were known for gambling, stealing, truancy, profanity, smoking and general recklessness. Several even lost limbs after jumping from moving streetcars. What the newsies needed, Portland’s progressives determined, was a clubhouse. For a model, they looked— as subsequent generations would—to San Francisco. As The Oregonian reported in 1910, boys there received instruction in “manual training, music, athletics and kindred exercises.” How to fund such an institution here? Portland decided to hold an election for a boy mayor. Ballots would cost a penny apiece, and ballotbox stuffing was to be encouraged. In 1914, Portland’s just-elected boy mayor, Eugene J. Rich, and his personal secretary, a Lincoln High School football player, sailed to California aboard the steamer Bear. Once they reached Hollywood, they were asked to star in a short silent film. A restoration of that 16-minute movie, and several others from the Oregon Historical Society, will be shown Thursday, April 27, at the Hollywood Theatre, some with live piano accompaniment. A fictional account of the titular character’s efforts


Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014

business as usual: a still from the 1914 silent film The Boy Mayor, starring members of Portland’s child government.

to rescue a street urchin from a life of petty crime, The Boy Mayor is emblematic of silent films of the Progressive Era that latched onto reformist causes like child labor, poverty and prostitution. Cinematically, it isn’t impressive. Like many of the old reels stored in a 100,000-square-foot OHS warehouse in Gresham, it’s dramatically inert, overwrought and amateurishly acted. But it justifies its existence if only for what it reveals about Portland’s delightfully idiosyncratic boy mayor program. If the film’s title cards can be trusted, Portland, a city of 200,000, was the only place in the U.S. with a child government. Plumbing Oregonian archives, it’s clear the program was more than a summertime diversion, though that was part of it. (During the 1910 festivities, a visiting San Francisco boy did a vaudeville act in blackface. He was deemed a “star performer.”) Local reformers talked of “the boy problem” and treated the election with gravity. The program, they argued, would instill a sense of civic duty and slash crime rates. Most ambitiously—and paternalistically—they believed it would protect Portland’s vulnerable youth. In 1910, its inaugural year, voting for boy mayor lasted a week, during which the candidate pool grew steadily. The Oregonian covered the race closely. June 23: “‘Dark Horse’ Lester Oakley Making Fast Strike Toward Top.” (Oakley, age 11, had enlisted his sister to canvas for him.) June 24: “Several hitherto unimportant candidates climbed dangerously near the top.” June 25: “Fight for Boy Mayor has Become Fast and Furious.” Voting booths were scattered downtown in hopes that businessmen would pause and make deposits for their favorite lads. One booth was located at department store Meier & Frank, where we presume young Harold Meier polled quite well. On the final day of voting, the polling headquarters on Southwest Stark Street “resembled a riot.” Newsies darted about, collecting whatever gold and checks they could to buy more votes for their boy, Sam Weinstein, a red-haired kid with pale blue eyes and a serious face. A “man of mystery,” who declined to reveal his name, purchased vote after vote for Bud Kribs, an independent candidate. But despite the efforts of this enigmatic fellow, Weinstein emerged victorious. All told, more than 150,000 ballots were cast. It was “an election as dramatic in its climax as anything ever seen in Portland.” Nearly as dramatic was Weinstein’s weeklong term. He and his boy council supported the completion of the Broadway Bridge, required that horse-drawn vehicles use taillights after dark, endorsed the purchase of Council Crest as a city park, and advocated for more

drinking fountains, swimming pools and band concerts. The regular mayor had made further requests of his juvenile counterpart, which it seems were ignored: “While you are at it, you might regulate the dancehall evil, determine the great question of ‘what is a sandwich,’ that we may tell just the difference between a restaurant and a drinking palace, solve the teamster’s strike and call on the 477 people on the East Side who want streets improved.” Sex. Sandwiches. Strikes. Streets. Who says times change? By 1912, candidates were canvassing extensively and hustling hard for votes. They made speeches at the Rotary Club and printed cards with campaign promises of lower taxes and more playgrounds. A few girls entered the fray, even if they demurred after being elected. In 1913, Alice Campbell said that while “always and unalterably a believer in the rightness and the beneficent effect of the feminine influence in public affairs...she felt a boy Commissioner might be able to ‘help more.’” From 1912 to 1914—there’s no mention of the program after 1914, and it’s unclear why it ended—the boy mayor and his junior administration met weekly. By 1914, they had a force of 50 boy police, “always on the alert to discover and deal severely with urchins guilty of petty thievery, short-changing, crap-shooting and other tabooed indulgences.” Boys attended theater productions of Sherlock Holmes “to learn methods of detecting crime,” and the juvenile court, which handled vexing newsboy cases, acquired “a reputation for dealing out speedy justice.” The towering achievement, though, was the newsboy clubhouse. Located on Southwest 1st Avenue, near where Lovejoy Fountain stands today, it had a swimming pool, gym, library and social hall with a player piano and a Victrola. There, boys encouraged each other to resist the temptations of modern life, and reformers rejoiced that vice was successfully being stamped out among these piteous, poverty-stricken youngsters. The clubhouse was “their one great joy, and the most wholesome influence in their young lives.” And the benefits went on. In the dark days before the establishment of the clubhouse, one newsboy a month was killed or seriously injured in an accident on the streets. But afterward? Well, reported The O: “This average has been reduced to only an occasional street accident.” GO: The Boy Mayor and other films from the ohs archives will be screened at the hollywood theatre at 7 pm thursday, april 24. $8.

APRIL 23–29


= WW Pick. Highly recommended.

Small Tab


Editor: REBECCA JACOBSON. TO BE CONSIDERED FOR LISTINGS, send screening information at least two weeks in advance to Screen, WW, 2220 NW Quimby St., Portland, OR 97210. Email: Fax: 243-1115.


9 Full Moons

[ONE NIGHT ONLY] A damaged party girl and a shy musician navigate a stormy romance. Clinton Street Theater. 7 pm Thursday, April 24.

300: Rise of an Empire

D+ Say what you will about Zack Snyder’s ultraviolent, exceedingly homoerotic 2006 film 300, but the comic-book adaptation delivered exactly what it promised: It was big and dumb, with visual verve of unprecedented elegance (plus a lot of shouting). Eight years later, nobody was exactly clamoring for a sequel to a film that saw its main characters beheaded, yet here we have Noam Murro’s 300: Rise of an Empire, a film that expands the battlefield to the ocean but unfolds as a cacophony of severed limbs, exploding bodies and CGI boats that look like they were pulled from an outdated 300 video game. R. AP KRYZA. Academy, Valley.

American Hustle

A From the sincerely insincere,

David O. Russell’s American Hustle builds genuine characters. The film’s establishing shot is brilliant in this regard: a humorously long sequence of Christian Bale’s potbellied con man, Irving Rosenfeld, gluing a toupee to his head. When meticulously permed federal agent Richie DiMaso (Bradley Cooper) makes a move on Rosenfeld’s girl almost immediately thereafter, it’s an insult. When he musses his rug, it’s an unforgivable violation. It’s a wild pretzel of a plot, and halfway through the film, it’s unclear who’s conning whom, but it’s clear everybody’s conning themselves. This is the high wire that makes American Hustle so exhilarating, with the quick turns of a David Mamet or Howard Hawks fast-talkie. R. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Laurelhurst, Valley.

Approved for Adoption

[ONE NIGHT ONLY, DIRECTOR ATTENDING] In this sepia-toned animated documentary, director Jung Henin recounts his memories as a South Korean adoptee growing up in Belgium. As the story moves into the present, a live-action Jung enters the film to try to make sense of his past. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 8 pm Saturday, April 26.

Bad Words

B- In Bad Words, Jason Bateman plays a 40-year-old named Guy exploiting a loophole in the rules that allows him to enter a prestigious spelling bee. Guy spends his downtime begrudgingly befriending a precocious boy whose hotel room is just a few doors down from his. The interactions between the two are the film’s highlight: Guy’s vulgar cynicism colliding with the kid’s bright-eyed innocence may

be low-hanging fruit, but Bateman still does a fine job of picking every ripe piece. R. MICHAEL NORDINE. Academy, Edgefield, Kennedy School, Laurelhurst, Movies on TV, St. Johns.


A nature documentary about an Alaskan family of the titular large fuzzy creatures. G. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Hilltop, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Sandy.

The Black Sea

[ONE NIGHT ONLY, DIRECTOR ATTENDING] Portland director Brian Padian holds a free public screening of his new narrative feature, the story of what happens to five friends when one of them disappears on a trip to the Oregon Coast. World Trade Center Auditorium, 26 SE Salmon St. 7 pm Sunday, April 27.

Brick Mansions

Sigh. Paul Walker. This film, a remake of French thriller District B13, was the last movie Walker completed before his death in a high-speed car crash. In it, he plays an undercover cop trying to protect Detroit from corruption and crime. The film screened after WW press deadlines, but look for AP Kryza’s review at PG-13. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Hilltop, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Tigard, Sandy.

Captain America: The Winter Soldier

C+ Of all the four-color icons, Captain America should be the least open to interpretation. Ol’ Winghead seemed a charming anachronism from the time Stan Lee assembled the uncanny freaks and amazing geeks of the Marvel Universe 50-some years ago, and the sheer strangeness of past generations’ uncomplicated ideals fueled the unexpected delights of Captain America: The First Avenger. Alas, where the 2011 film found a dreamily compelling momentum, Captain America: The Winter Soldier wades through thankless cameos and interminable exposition. Once again, star Chris Evans’ unaffected certitude and boyish self-regard suggest why a mortal might one day command the Marvel gods and monsters. But now his appealing mix of officer and gentleman has been reduced to frat-house moralizing. PG-13. JAY HORTON. 99W Drive-In, Bagdad, Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Hilltop, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place, Sherwood, Sandy, St. Johns.

market GUIDe

WW’s market Guide returns with a look at Portland’s specialty markets. We’ll visit farmers markets, world markets, bakeries and greengrocers, and tell you where to get the best meats, spices, and coffee. We’ll even include a few recipes from notable chefs to inspire the home cook to explore the boutiques and purveyors that enrich our culinary community. Circulation: 70,000

Publishes: May 7th, 2014 Space Reservation & Materials Deadline: Thursday, April 24th at 4 pm

503.243.2122 • CONT. on page 48 Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014


APRIL 23–29

Child’s Pose

Rio 2 3D (G) 11:45AM 2:30PM 5:15PM 8:00PM 10:40PM Brick Mansions (PG-13) 12:35PM 3:00PM 5:30PM 8:00PM 10:25PM Noah (PG-13) 12:25PM 3:50PM 7:10PM 10:20PM Captain America: The Winter Soldier (PG-13) Oculus (R) 11:50AM 2:35PM 5:10PM 7:55PM 10:40PM 11:15AM 2:25PM 5:45PM 9:00PM Walking With The Enemy (R) 10:55AM 1:50PM 4:45PM Haunted House 2, A (R) 12:15PM 2:50PM 5:20PM 7:40PM 10:35PM 7:45PM 10:15PM Heaven Is For Real (PG) 11:25AM 2:00PM 4:35PM Bears (G) 12:30PM 2:45PM 5:00PM 7:15PM 9:30PM 7:20PM 9:55PM God’s Not Dead (PG) 11:10AM 2:00PM 4:50PM 7:40PM Other Woman, The (PG-13) 11:05AM 12:40PM 1:55PM 10:30PM 3:30PM 4:40PM 6:20PM 7:35PM 9:10PM 10:20PM Grand Budapest Hotel, The (R) 11:30AM 2:10PM Rio 2 (G) 11:00AM 1:40PM 4:25PM 7:05PM 9:50PM 4:55PM 7:30PM 10:05PM Transcendence (PG-13) 10:55AM 12:10PM 1:50PM Divergent (PG-13) 12:20PM 3:40PM 7:00PM 10:10PM 3:05PM 4:45PM 6:10PM 7:45PM 9:05PM 10:40PM Draft Day (PG-13) 11:35AM 2:20PM 5:05PM 7:50PM Quiet Ones, The (PG-13) 11:40AM 2:15PM 4:50PM 10:35PM 7:25PM 10:00PM Captain America: The Winter Soldier XD3D (PG-13) 12:45PM 4:00PM 7:10PM 10:25PM

Oculus (R) 3:20PM 9:00PM Other Woman, The (PG-13) 11:20AM 12:40PM 2:00PM 3:20PM 4:40PM 6:00PM 7:20PM 8:40PM 10:00PM Walking With The Enemy (R) 11:00AM 1:55PM 4:45PM 7:40PM 10:30PM Noah (PG-13) 1:30PM 9:40PM Rio 2 (G) 11:00AM 1:40PM 4:40PM 7:20PM 10:00PM Transcendence (PG-13) 11:05AM 12:30PM 1:55PM 4:45PM 6:10PM 7:35PM 10:25PM Quiet Ones, The (PG-13) 12:30PM 3:00PM 5:30PM 8:00PM 10:30PM Rio 2 3D (G) 12:15PM 2:50PM Haunted House 2, A (R) 12:00PM 3:00PM 5:20PM 7:40PM 10:00PM

Brick Mansions (PG-13) 11:00AM 1:20PM 3:40PM 6:00PM 8:20PM 10:35PM Captain America: The Winter Soldier 3D (PG-13) 5:25PM 8:35PM Heaven Is For Real (PG) 11:30AM 2:00PM 4:30PM 7:10PM 9:40PM Bears (G) 11:00AM 1:10PM 3:10PM 5:30PM 7:40PM 9:50PM Draft Day (PG-13) 11:10AM 2:00PM 4:50PM 7:40PM 10:30PM Grand Budapest Hotel, The (R) 11:00AM 4:40PM 7:10PM Captain America: The Winter Soldier (PG-13) 12:05PM 3:30PM 7:00PM 10:10PM Divergent (PG-13) 12:00PM 3:30PM 7:00PM 10:10PM

Noah (PG-13) 11:45AM 3:10PM 6:40PM 9:50PM Oculus (R) 11:20AM 2:00PM 4:40PM 7:15PM 10:05PM Transcendence (PG-13) 1:00PM 4:00PM 7:10PM 10:10PM Heaven Is For Real (PG) 11:25AM 2:10PM 4:50PM 7:45PM 10:20PM Rio 2 3D (G) 11:50AM 2:25PM 5:10PM Rio 2 (G) 11:00AM 1:40PM 4:35PM 7:25PM 10:15PM Other Woman, The (PG-13) 11:00AM 12:15PM 1:40PM 3:05PM 4:30PM 5:50PM 7:20PM 8:45PM 10:10PM Quiet Ones, The (PG-13) 11:30AM 2:15PM 5:00PM 7:45PM 10:25PM

Brick Mansions (PG-13) 12:00PM 2:30PM 5:00PM 7:30PM 10:00PM Captain America: The Winter Soldier 3D (PG-13) 2:20PM 9:00PM Haunted House 2, A (R) 12:10PM 2:50PM 5:20PM 7:55PM 10:20PM Bears (G) 12:15PM 2:30PM 4:45PM 7:00PM 9:15PM Draft Day (PG-13) 7:50PM 10:30PM Grand Budapest Hotel, The (R) 11:55AM 2:35PM 5:05PM 7:40PM 10:15PM Captain America: The Winter Soldier (PG-13) 11:10AM 12:40PM 3:55PM 5:35PM 7:20PM 10:30PM Divergent (PG-13) 12:30PM 3:50PM 7:05PM 10:25PM

Movie times subject to change, call theaters for times Showtimes valid Friday to Thursday

B Romania is currently in the midst

of a decadelong cinematic hot streak, and Child’s Pose won the prestigious Golden Bear at last year’s Berlin Film Festival. In the film, a 30-something layabout faces serious time after killing a child in a car accident, and his domineering mother can’t help but try to get him off the hook. Director Călin Peter Netzer deftly examines loss, dependency and the delicate bonds that hold families together. As the mother, Luminiţa Gheorghiu is restrained but powerful, breathing life and credibility into what could have been an overwrought role. MICHAEL NORDINE. Living Room Theaters.

Colosio: The Assassination

[ONE NIGHT ONLY] In Carlos Bolado’s 2012 film, he dramatizes the assassination of Mexican presidential candidate Donaldo Colosio, who was killed at a campaign rally in Tijuana in 1994. Hollywood Theatre. 7 pm Friday, April 25.

The Den

[ONE NIGHT ONLY] The Clinton Street’s IFC Midnight series—a program devoted mostly to thrillers, horror and sci-fi—continues with Zachary Donohue’s found-footage feature about a woman who witnesses a murder captured on a webcam and then finds herself targeted. R. Clinton Street Theater. 11 pm Friday, April 25.


B At first glance, Divergent would seem to be riding on the coattails of The Hunger Games. Here’s another dystopian YA novel-turned-wannabe blockbuster, with another rising star— Shailene Woodley, in for Jennifer Lawrence—at the center. But with Divergent, director Neil Burger proves there’s more than one way to ride this wave. Veronica Roth wrote Divergent while still in college, and she brings together the overthrow of an oppressive government and a freshman-year identity crisis. Conceptually, Divergent employs elements from Harry Potter, G.I. Jane and Gattaca, and visually, it offers a memorable take on the postapocalyptic landscape without overdosing on CGI. PG-13. LAUREN TERRY. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Forest, Hilltop, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place, Sherwood.

day of an alternate-reality football draft, the film hardly leaves the training facility, focusing on the plight of an underappreciated, oft-overlooked figure in pro sports: the rich, white general manager. Pressured to “make a splash,” new Browns GM Sonny Weaver (played by Kevin Costner as a wooden plank with eyes) has a choice: Does he trade up to nab the sure-thing quarterback…or go with his gut? There is natural intrigue in the machinations of powerful men playing chess with the careers of young athletes, and for fleeting moments, Draft Day conjures some of that. But then the rest of Weaver’s life interrupts, and the film dissolves into NFL-sponsored pablum. PG-13. MATTHEW SINGER. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Living Room Theaters, Oak Grove, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Sandy.


B Enemy, the latest film from Prisoners director Denis Villeneuve, begins with a koanlike epigraph: “Chaos is order yet undeciphered.” As self-serious as that line may be, Villeneuve quickly redeems himself with a series of hypnotically weird scenes that prove this isn’t entirely an indulgent exercise in pseudo-intellectualism. Enemy centers on an affectless history professor named Adam (Jake Gyllenhaal) who discovers that an actor in a silly rom-com looks exactly like him. As the look-alikes, Gyllenhaal turns in two sly and playful performances, sweating and stuttering as Adam, crowing and strutting as Anthony. R. REBECCA JACOBSON. Academy.

Ernest & Celestine

A- This charming Belgian children’s film has no oh-so-clever pop-culture references, no 3-D, no Happy Meal tie-ins. It’s just a sweet story about an orphaned mouse who befriends a bear. This U.S. release is dubbed

in English with the voices of Nick Offerman and Forest Whitaker. PG. RUTH BROWN. Laurelhurst.

Finding Vivian Maier

A- In our era of unparalleled self-

aggrandizement, it’s difficult for us to comprehend why anyone, let alone a talented artist, might choose to keep her achievements to herself. But Vivian Maier, street photographer and Chicago nanny, did just that. When she died in 2009, penniless and alone, she left behind hundreds of thousands of negatives, as well as thousands of rolls of undeveloped film. The interviews with her former employers and child charges, while fascinating and at times disturbing, can’t hold a candle to her work, which is the real star of this documentary. The photos, particularly the self-portraits, appear on the screen like mini-revelations, flashes of genius from the best photographer you’ve probably never heard of. DEBORAH KENNEDY. Cinema 21.


B Compared to the pandering messiness of most kids’ movies, there’s plenty here to excite the familyfriendly faithful. Widescreen 3-D visuals sculpt an endlessly inventive setting of ice palaces and snowcapped peaks, the original songs soar and tickle as needed, and snowman sidekick Olaf giddily beats back the encroaching melodrama. IPG. JAY HORTON. Kiggins, Laurelhurst.

The Galapagos Affair

A- It’s a story worthy of Agatha

Christie: A heap of Europeans alight on a remote, rocky island in the Galapagos, all with their own harebrained notions of escaping the decadence of modern society and creating paradise in an exotic locale. Sexual intrigue, jealousy and betrayal flourish. Within a few years, several have disappeared under shady cir-



Dom Hemingway

B+ Jude Law is all grown up. In

Richard Shepard’s gangster send-up Dom Hemingway, Law has ditched his pretty-boy looks to play a petty criminal with a paunch and “a face like an abortion.” The results are so delightful you can’t help hoping Law lets his hairline recede and gym membership expire. Dom Hemingway begins with our imprisoned hero, naked of torso and arms akimbo, delivering a soliloquy about the many splendors of his “exquisite cock.” His penis is a Picasso, Hemingway argues. It’s a Renoir. Perhaps he’s right, but we never see the member. The true work of art and the driving force behind this farce, is Dom’s brain. Because, my God, the similes that flow from Dom’s mouth, even when he’s reeling from a bird-and-blow binge. That’s not to say Dom Hemingway is deep. But it’s damned entertaining, thanks both to Law, who inhabits Hemingway’s sideburns, leisure suits and slouch like he was born a small-time Midlands wastrel, and Richard E. Grant, whose portrayal of the long-suffering, clothesobsessed Dickie is a breath of wry air. R. DEBORAH KENNEDY. Fox Tower.

Draft Day

C- Has it really come to this, Cleveland? Have things with your sports teams gotten so bad you’ve taken to writing fan fiction about the NFL draft? Not about a game or a season. The draft. Way to aim high. To be fair, even though it’s co-written by a native son of northeast Ohio, Draft Day isn’t really about the Browns or that long-suffering city on the banks of the Cuyahoga. Slot in any losing franchise and the movie remains the same. Set—you guessed it—on the


Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014

KNOCKED COLD: As Winter in the Blood opens, a young Blackfoot Indian named Virgil First Raise (Chaske Spencer) finds himself piss-ass drunk in a ditch, staggering toward a hallucination of his dead father—who had himself died in a ditch 10 years before. Virgil’s state only worsens from there. First he learns that his wife, Agnes, has “gone to town” to bargain for a drink or two with his rifle. When he sets out to reclaim the rifle—never mind about the girl—he encounters the cagey “Airplane Man,” has a drunken rendezvous with a barmaid and winds up with lots of bloodied body parts. Based on the 1974 novel by James Welch and directed by Missoula, Mont., brothers Alex and Andrew Smith, Winter in the Blood follows Virgil as he searches for answers to his traumatic past and seeks meaning for his pained present. The plot is nuanced and layered, much like its protagonist, who narrates the film in voice-over: “To be a human is not easy. I guess to be an Indian is not easy.” Though the film fails the Bechdel test—aside from the yellow-toothed Agnes, the only other woman we meet is a pathetic one-night stand who gets slapped in the face—Winter in the Blood successfully makes a challenging character sympathetic without collapsing into sentimentality. KATHRYN PEIFER. A- SEE IT: Winter in the Blood is at NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 7 pm Wednesday and Sunday, April 23 and 27.

APRIL 23–29



School, Laurelhurst, Joy Cinema.

Mr. Peabody & Sherman

Two Rocky & Bullwinkle characters—a hyperintelligent beagle and a 7-year-old boy—take some trips in a time machine. PG. 99W Drive-In, Academy, Edgefield, Kennedy School, Laurelhurst, Movies on TV, St. Johns.

Muppets Most Wanted

B While awful choices abound, the Muppets reflexively generate so much unsinkable goodwill that even the laziest of plots still charms—and might even be welcome, given the ’70s-meets-art deco visual aesthetic and escalating cameo bombs. PG. JAY HORTON. Indoor Twin, Mt. Hood, Movies on TV.

Noah FINDING VIVIAN MAIER cumstances and others are dead, with at least one the victim of an apparent murder. This documentary recounts the deliciously pulpy events of 1934, drawing on home-movie footage from the time and an excellent voiceover cast that reads the letters and diaries of those involved, who include a Nietzsche-obsessed egomaniac and a horse-toothed, revolver-wielding baroness with a “pair of servile gigolos.” In the words of an American entomologist who often visited the island, “Go where you may, you cannot escape the problem of social adjustment.” There’s no Hercule Poirot here to piece together this still-unsolved mystery, but perhaps that’s all for the better. REBECCA JACOBSON. Living Room Theaters.

The Grand Budapest Hotel

B+ The old, snide rejoinder to an

over-decorated show is that “you leave humming the sets,” but Wes Anderson’s The Grand Budapest Hotel may be the first movie where you come out tasting them. The titular Alpine resort is the most edible-looking lodge in cinema: a multitiered, pink-frosted castle designed to endure as an ambrosial memory. Our hero, M. Gustave, is the dapper concierge running the Grand Budapest front desk and back halls. He’s played by Ralph Fiennes with such flowery cosmopolitanism that you can almost see the cloud of cologne drifting behind him as he scurries to his next boudoir appointment with a rich dowager. I’d love to recite an ode to The Grand Budapest Hotel, because it’s the most politically aware story Anderson has told. Yet I can’t shake the feeling that something’s missing. Who are these beautiful visitors in The Grand Budapest Hotel? They’re meant to be ghosts, but they shouldn’t be strangers. We stick out our tongues to catch the shimmering snowflakes, and taste only air. R. AARON MESH. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, CineMagic, Hollywood, Lake Twin, Moreland, Oak Grove, Lloyd Center, Roseway, St. Johns.


A- With Gravity, Alfonso Cuarón and his screenwriter son, Jonas, take on the most primal fear possible, that of being lost in an abyss of nothingness. The film features only two actors, Sandra Bullock and George Clooney. Their simple space-station repair mission turns into a nightmare as debris from a destroyed satellite tears their shuttle to shreds and they’re left hopelessly adrift. We, like the characters, are stuck, watching the events as they unfold, mostly in real time, and gasping for our collective breath as the oxygen meter slowly runs out. PG-13. AP KRYZA. Valley, Joy Cinema.

A Haunted House 2

The 2013 original was almost universally panned, and in this followup horror spoof, we can only expect more hanky-panky between stuffed animals and Marlon Wayans. R. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place, Sherwood, Sandy.

Heaven Is for Real

A based-on-truth drama, starring Greg Kinnear as a father whose son

attests that he visited heaven after a near-death experience. PG. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cornelius, Hilltop, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Sandy.


B+ And so there’s this computer. It’s

an artificially hyperintelligent operating system that’s half personal secretary, half therapist. It seems to be thinking. It seems to know you. You fall in love with her. She develops the capacity for jealousy. She starts saying things like, “I’m becoming much more than they programmed.” Twenty years ago, this scenario would’ve played as a dystopian nightmare. But in the era of Catfish, where “dating” is an increasingly abstract concept, the premise of Spike Jonze’s Her can serve as the basis for an honest-to-goodness relationship drama. R. MATTHEW SINGER. Laurelhurst.


A- In his adaptation of the novel by

Southern master Larry Brown, David Gordon Green returns to where he started, with a long and low evocation of the fucked-up American South. Nicolas Cage plays the titular Joe, and while his hair often plays a supporting role in his films, in Joe his beard hides the fact that he’s even Nicolas Cage. Joe’s main role is as mentor to vagrant teen Gary (Tye Sheridan of Mud and The Tree of Life, in a beautiful performance), who is terrorized by his father, one of the most frightening men I’ve seen in film. Non-actor Gary Poulter was discovered by Green at a bus stop (he died before the film was released), and his dead-eyed alcoholic stare could not be faked. Nothing, in fact, seems faked. In a film that could have been deep melodrama or deep sentimentalism, no note rings false. R. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Living Room Theaters.

The Lego Movie

B+ Using a combination of com-

puter and stop-motion animation that keeps the herky-jerky laws of Lego physics in mind, The Lego Movie follows milquetoast construction worker Emmet (Chris Pratt) on a hero’s journey. Just when the film starts becoming too cute, the plot shifts into another nutso action sequence filled with clever sight gags. PG. AP KRYZA. Mt. Hood, Valley, Joy Cinema.


[ONE NIGHT ONLY] A new 40-minute documentary protesting coal exports in the Pacific Northwest. Clinton Street Theater. 7 and 8:30 pm Monday, April 28.

The Monuments Men

C+ The story of The Monuments Men is inspiring. During World War II, a squadron of older art scholars was dispatched to Europe in an effort to protect art and other precious cultural artifacts from being destroyed by bombs, stolen by the Nazis or swiped by private collectors. Alas, what could have been a weird cross between Inglourious Basterds and Ocean’s Eleven turns out to be a slog. PG-13. AP KRYZA. Academy, Kennedy

Maybe you’ve heard this story about a giant flood and some animals on a boat. Russell Crowe apparently got the pope’s blessing for the movie, but the studio doesn’t seem to have the same level of faith—Noah didn’t screen for Portland critics. PG-13. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Forest, Hilltop, Movies on TV, Sherwood.

PG. 29


Nymphomaniac: Volume I

B- Nymphomaniac arrives with a firestorm of press about sex, sex and more sex. But as in most Lars von Trier movies, the real subject isn’t so much sex as the endless suffering of women. Charlotte Gainsbourg’s character, Joe, the titular nymphomaniac, arrives as a beaten hump, and this first installment of the two-part film is essentially her confession of her history of joyless sex with 10 or 20 men a day since she was a teenager. In its absurdist utopianism without understanding, it reaches back to von Trier’s most vital movie, The Idiots. But unlike that film, Nymphomaniac is almost without affect. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Laurelhurst.

Nymphomaniac: Volume II

C- Le sigh. It couldn’t last. The first half of Lars von Trier’s Nymphomaniac managed to strike a wobbly balance between humorously abstract rumination and subzero-temp sexploitation. But the second part of his examination of the travails of a selfprofessed nymphomaniac (Charlotte Gainsbourg) is just a litany of complaint, delivered in Latin. And so the titular nymphomaniac is betrayed by both protegee and mentor, slapped around just so she can feel again, kicked in the face, and subjected to even worse indignities. Why? Because for some particularly trollish part of von Trier, pain is always the truth beneath any dream of happiness. “I am a nymphomaniac!” Gainsbourg proudly declares to a sex-addict support group that looks frumpy by comparison. Her triumph is brief. The film is not. MATTHEW KORFHAGE. Cinema 21.

Stay on the Edge of the Pearl.


B As evil mirrors go, you can’t ask for

one much scarier than the gothic fever dream of gnarled darkness seething menace from the Oculus poster and app. However dispiriting the prospect of home-office décor as bogeyman, a good prop, a great director (Mike Flanagan), and an ideal cast (top TV vets led by epochal nerd crushes Karen “Amy Pond” Gillan and Katee “Starbuck” Sackhoff) can still wring genuine terror from a daft premise. Gillan, as the older sister, must outfight and outwit the antique fixture that killed her parents. Flanagan employs the lingering trauma of Kaylie and her brother, newly released from a psychiatric institution, just enough to heighten character fragility and loosen the audience’s moorings. By film’s end, the actual demonic presences seem relatively cheeseball in comparison to the onslaught of undimmed memories. As so often happens with these types of movies, more than a glimpse through the looking glass tends to disappoint, but visions of past innocence seen from the rear view are always creepier than you’d assume.

CONT. on page 50

Walk to Timbers Games!

Bargain Rates Downtown from $45 per night single occupancy ($55 double)

The GeorGia hoTel A Vintage Walk-Up Stroll to Powell’s, Shops, Restaurants, Theaters & Crystal Ballroom

308 SW 12th at Stark St. • 503- 227-3259 Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014


APRIL 23–29

R. JAY HORTON. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Movies on TV, Sandy.

The Other Woman

In what looks like some seriously antifeminist dreck, three beautiful women— Cameron Diaz, Leslie Mann and Kate Upton—team up to exact revenge on the douchebag who’s been sleeping with all of them. Screened after WW press deadlines, but look for Jay Horton’s review at PG-13. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Living Room Theaters, Oak Grove, Bridgeport, City Center, Division, Hilltop, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Sherwood, Tigard, Sandy.

Penny Allen Retrospective

[TWO NIGHTS ONLY, DIRECTOR ATTENDING] Auteur Penny Allen returns to Portland—the setting of her 1978 debut, Property—for a two-night retrospective. Saturday features Property and Paydirt, while Sunday shifts to such documentaries as The Soldier’s Tale and The Didier Connection. Collaborators, including Gus Van Sant and Walt Curtis, are also scheduled to appear. Hollywood Theatre. 7 and 9 pm Saturday-Sunday, April 26-27.


C- The hardest part about watching

Philomena, a film based on the true story of an Irish woman’s search for the son she gave up for adoption 50 years previous, is accepting the amazing Judi Dench as a bumbling simpleton in the title role. If you can get over Dench as Grandma Goof, then Philomena stands on its own two feet. One of those feet is the enthralling, often emotional storyline. Unfortunately, the other foot is the waiter-my-soup humor that Fawlty Towers made irrelevant four decades ago. PG-13. MITCH LILLIE. Academy, Laurelhurst.

The Raid 2

B+ Poor Rama. The last time we saw

the baby-faced Indonesian rookie cop in 2011’s excellent The Raid: Redemption, he had just fought his way up a 15-floor apartment building filled with violent criminals. All he wanted was to get back to his pregnant wife alive. But within the first few minutes of The Raid 2, Rama is forced to go undercover in a prison to infiltrate a powerful crime family. If he doesn’t, he’ll risk the lives of his young family. Things only get worse from there. Welsh-born, Indonesia-based filmmaker Gareth Evans had a similarly crappy choice to make with this sequel. One of the best things about Redemption was the unrelenting action—the stunts and gore that left viewers alternately grinning and wincing as star and fight choreographer Iko Uwais delivered a master class in the martial art of pencak silat. If The Raid 2 is not quite as consistently compelling as its predecessor, it holds much more promise. R. RUTH BROWN. Cinema 21.

The Railway Man

Colin Firth stars in this adaptation of an autobiography by Eric Lomax, a former prisoner of war who tracks down his Japanese tormentor decades later. R. Fox Tower.

Rio 2

It’s back to the Brazilian tropics, with Anne Hathaway and Jesse Eisenberg voicing mama and papa macaws raising a feathered brood. WW was too hungover from spring break to make the screening. G. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Hilltop, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place, Sherwood, Sandy.


C+ On the surface, techno thrillers seem like a slam dunk: As technology evolves, so do the potential plot devices for effects-heavy films that pit man against the very stuff designed to benefit humanity. Trouble is, a film’s shelf life shrinks as technology advances. The long list of movies that were once considered “cuttingedge” should serve as a warning to directors. Transcendence, at the very least, addresses a compelling question: What are the benefits and costs of computers that behave with the intelligence (and potential malevolence) of a super-evolved human mind? The


cautionary tale centers on Drs. Will and Evelyn Caster (Johnny Depp and Rebecca Hall), whose lives are torn apart when Will is mortally wounded by terrorists attempting to halt his revolutionary artificial-intelligence program. Distraught, Evelyn and a colleague manage to record Will’s brain patterns and incorporate them into the supercomputer’s operating system, effectively resurrecting him. But wait…is it Will? Credit director Wally Pfister for making things look gorgeous and feel creepy. But things also jackknife jarringly, with characters inexplicably switching allegiances and fundamentally flipping their ideals halfway through. Such muddy characterization means that even if the film’s technology never feels as outdated as a flip phone, it’s still unlikely to endure. PG13. AP KRYZA. Cedar Hills, Eastport, Clackamas, Mill Plain, Cornelius, Oak Grove, Hilltop, Lloyd Center, Movies on TV, Pioneer Place, Sherwood, Sandy.

Tribute to James Blue: The March

The NW Film Center pays homage to local director James Blue, who documented the civil-rights movement in the1964 documentary The March. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 8 pm Friday, April 25.

Under the Skin

B Jonathan Glazer’s Under the Skin is

a sci-fi/horror hybrid starring Scarlett Johansson as a gorgeous, man-eating alien who lures dudes home with the unspoken promise of sex—only to deliver an exceptionally elegant drowning. Why ScarJo, decked out in skintight, acid-washed jeans and a Karen Carpenter wig, is compelled to take men home to one her many mirror-floored apartments is never explained beyond a creepy, 2001: A Space Odysseyesque montage of images that includes a bloody meat conveyor belt and an exploding star. The lack of clarity is part of the film’s appeal. But it’s also frustratingly shallow at times, and would be nothing without its soundtrack. Part otherworldly bee-buzzing, part feedback and all straight-up spook, Mica Levi’s score sets a terrifying tone. Prepare to be scared shitless, even as you shake your head over the story’s many twists, particularly its turn toward tenderness at the end. R. DEBORAH KENNEDY. Hollywood.

The Unknown Known

B+ The most interesting thing about

The Unknown Known is how seemingly unrevealing it is. That may sound like a backhanded compliment, but really it’s a testament to how impressively guarded, defensive and almost certainly full of shit Donald Rumsfeld truly is. Errol Morris, the master documentarian behind Gates of Heaven, has made a career of shining a light on the ultimate subjectivity (if not downright unknowability) of truth. In Rummy, he’s found what may be the ultimate embodiment of this notion. PG13. MICHAEL NORDINE. Living Room Theaters.

The Wind Rises

B- Early in Hayao Miyazaki’s latest— and probably final—film, an earthquake strikes Tokyo. The earth buckles and writhes, rippling like a belly dancer’s abdomen. It’s a remarkably moving scene, both for its raw kinetic energy and for the clear sense of physical and human destruction. Alas, the rest of The Wind Rises, even as it showcases Miyazaki’s painterly hand-drawn animation, isn’t nearly so dynamic. And that’s in spite of a story that revolves around flight, the based-on-truth tale of an ace aeronautical engineer named Jiro. Born in 1903, Jiro’s devotion to airplanes gets him unwillingly swept up in the war machine. There’s an interesting tension here between technology and totalitarianism, but Jiro is so thinly developed— he’s a genius at work and a sweet husband to his consumptive wife at home—that the question quickly evaporates. PG-13. REBECCA JACOBSON. Laurelhurst.

With Morning Hearts

[ONE NIGHT ONLY, DIRECTOR ATTENDING] David MacDougall screens his slice-of-life documentary about a boarding school in India. NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium. 7:30 pm Thursday, April 24.

Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014



POMMEL HORSIN’ AROUND: Kurt Thomas vs. Parmistan.



There was a time when Earth’s mightiest heroes weren’t pretty-boy actors decked out in capes and tights, reliant on computer effects to show off their powers. But, like Batman after taking the fall for the murder of Harvey Dent, these real-life superheroes have retreated from the spotlight. I’m talking, of course, about professional athletes who crossed over from real life into the fantasy world of cinema. For a while, we lived in a decades-spanning golden age of athletes-turnedaction stars. Fullback Jim Brown joined The Dirty Dozen and became a blaxploitation icon. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar battled Bruce Lee in Game of Death. Wilt Chamberlain transformed into a killing machine in Conan the Destroyer. Michael Jordan fought for personal dignity in Space Jam. Dennis Rodman sidekicked for Jean-Claude Van Damme in Double Team before striking out on his own in Simon Sez. Even Howie Long and his buzzcut went all “Die Hard in a forest fire” with Firestorm. But perhaps the greatest athlete-driven action flick was 1985’s Kurt Thomas vehicle Gymkata, the victim of this month’s Hecklevision (Hollywood Theatre, 9:30 pm Friday, April 25). For those not up on their Cold Warera gymnastics, Thomas was a world champion poised to dominate the 1980 Olympics…until the U.S. boycotted the games over the Soviet war in Afghanistan (hindsight, you are glorious). That didn’t stop Thomas from taking gymnastics to the next level, though, with Gymkata, a martial arts film in which he’s pitted against hordes of combatants in the fictional country of Parmistan. It’s a land conveniently littered with pommel horses and crossbars, and guarded by soldiers who are lulled into submission by the sight of a somersaulting, unitarded man—who promptly punches them in the face. Gymkata, a commercial and critical failure that went on to achieve cult status, is a prime example of the kinds of risks Hollywood doesn’t take anymore, and should serve as inspiration for currentday athletes vying for silver-screen glory. Who wouldn’t want to watch a film in which Robin Lopez is sucked through a portal, winds up in medieval times and slays a dragon by slamdunking a sacred orb in its mouth? Wouldn’t

Metta World Peace be perfect for an update of the Michael Douglas film Falling Down, in which the former Ron Artest snaps and goes on a rampage because somebody told him he had a bad haircut? Why hasn’t anyone cast Paddy Mills in a dystopian Outback car-chase film, or Ndamukong Suh as a rage-fueled superhero whose powers include neck-stomping (The Ncredible Hulk)? The answer is simple. These movies would suck. Just look at Gymkata. But then again, just look at Gymkata…it’s incredible. Twenty years from now, how will we explain to our children that they missed the chance to see Richard Sherman and Eugene Levy team up for a buddy-cop flick? ALSO SHOWING: Reel Feminism presents Siren Spirits, a quartet of films focusing on death, none of which, sadly, is an action epic in which Lisa Leslie and Brandi Chastain take down a sadistic oil tycoon. Clinton Street Theater. 7 pm Wednesday, April 23. Yes, there are still plans for a Top Gun sequel. No, it won’t find Maverick and Ice Man raising a family. Because of “don’t ask, don’t tell,” we assume. Laurelhurst Theater. April 25-May 1. Wanna watch two dudes wait for inevitable death while locked in a Soviet war prison? 1977’s The Ascent is the cure for your springtime blues. 5th Avenue Cinema. 7:30 pm Friday, April 25. But seriously, 5th Avenue: First Soviet prisons, then Come and See, a war drama about a young man who returns to his Soviet village only to find pretty much everything, including innocence, dead. Is a documentary about puppy euthanasia up next week?! (Actually, Come and See is great, harrowing and overlooked.) 5th Avenue Cinema. April 25-27. Portland band Subterranean Howl’s new album is based on the bizarro 1928 Lon Chaney freakout West of Zanzibar, and the band will debut a live score during a screening of the silent oddity. Clinton Street Theater. 8 pm Friday, April 25. Friends of Trees screens the 1926 Douglas Fairbanks swashbuckler The Black Pirate at a fundraiser that’s also a pirate-themed party, because apparently that still happens. Clinton Street Theater. 7 pm Saturday, April 26. The Hollywood gets the time-machine treatment with The Wizard of Oz. Saturday features a live organ prelude and vintage newsreels. Hollywood Theatre. 2 pm Saturday-Sunday, April 26-27. There was a time when “Italian horror” meant more than a nightmare about Roberto Benigni crawling over your chair. This double feature—Lucio Fulci’s surrealist The Gates of Hell and the ultra-violent Burial Ground: Night of Terror—celebrates the country’s cinematic tradition of gut-ripping monsters and cheesy synth scores. Hollywood Theatre. 7:30 pm Tuesday, April 29.



1 9 8 6 - PA R A M O U N T P I C T U R E S


NW Film Center’s Whitsell Auditorium


Regal Pioneer Place Stadium 6 BE MY WINGMAN: Top Gun plays April 25-May 1 at the Laurelhurst Theater.

Roseway Theatre

Regal Lloyd Center 10 & IMAX

1510 NE Multnomah St. PETER GABRIEL: BACK TO FRONT Wed 07:30 TRANSCENDENCE: THE IMAX EXPERIENCE FriSat-Sun-Wed 01:30, 04:30, 07:30, 10:30 TRANSCENDENCE FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:50, 03:50, 06:50, 09:50 BEARS Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:25, 02:45, 05:15, 07:15, 10:10 A HAUNTED HOUSE 2 Wed 12:00, 02:20, 04:45, 07:10, 09:35 THE GRAND BUDAPEST HOTEL FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:40, 03:30, 06:30, 09:25 CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:20, 03:40, 07:00 CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER 3D Wed 10:20 RIO 2 Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 02:40, 07:35, 09:55 RIO 2 3D Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:05, 05:00 DRAFT DAY Wed 01:00, 03:45, 10:15 NOAH Wed 12:10, 03:20, 10:05 OCULUS Wed 12:35, 03:15, 06:35, 09:30 SHATNER’S WORLD BRICK MANSIONS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 12:35, 03:00, 05:25, 07:50, 10:15 THE OTHER WOMAN FriSun-Mon-Tue 01:05, 03:55, 07:10, 10:00 THE QUIET ONES Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue 12:05, 02:35, 05:05, 07:35, 10:05 CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER -- AN IMAX 3D EXPERIENCE Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue 03:40 WALKING WITH THE ENEMY FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue 12:10, 03:10, 06:40, 09:45 THE METROPOLITAN OPERA: COSì FAN TUTTE Sat 09:55

Regal Lloyd Mall 8

2320 Lloyd Center Mall HEAVEN IS FOR REAL Wed 12:15, 03:00, 05:45, 08:45 RIO 2 3D Wed 02:10, 08:25 RIO 2 Wed 11:30, 05:40 CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER 3D Wed 02:40, 08:30 CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER Wed 11:30, 05:35 THE RAID 2 Wed 05:00, 08:20 CESAR CHAVEZ Wed 11:50, 02:55, 05:50, 09:00 NOAH Wed 05:25, 08:35 MUPPETS MOST WANTED Wed 11:35, 02:30, 05:20 DIVERGENT Wed 12:50, 04:30, 08:10 MR. PEABODY & SHERMAN Wed 11:55, 02:35 SON OF GOD Wed 08:15 THE LEGO MOVIE Wed 11:40, 02:20

Avalon Theatre & Wunderland

3451 SE Belmont St., 503238-1617 300: RISE OF AN EMPIRE Wed 05:30, 07:30, 09:25

ROBOCOP Wed 07:05, 09:15 THE NUT JOB Wed 12:15, 02:00, 03:45 FROZEN Wed 01:05, 03:05, 05:05

Bagdad Theater and Pub

3702 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 503-249-7474 CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:15, 03:30, 07:00, 10:15

Cinema 21

616 NW 21st Ave., 503-2234515 THE GRAND BUDAPEST HOTEL Wed 04:30, 07:00, 09:30 NYMPHOMANIAC: VOLUME II Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 06:45, 09:15 THE RAID 2 Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 03:15, 09:45 FINDING VIVIAN MAIER FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue 04:45, 07:00, 09:00 THE ROOM Fri 10:45

Clinton Street Theater


Laurelhurst Theatre & Pub

2735 E Burnside St., 503232-5511 THE MONUMENTS MEN Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 07:00 BAD WORDS Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 04:30, 07:20, 07:20 RESERVOIR DOGS Wed 09:40 12 YEARS A SLAVE Wed 06:30 NYMPHOMANIAC: VOLUME I Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 09:15 AMERICAN HUSTLE Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 09:00 PHILOMENA FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 06:45 HER Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 09:30 TOP GUN Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 09:25 THE WIND RISES Fri-Sat-Sun 04:10 THE WIND RISES Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue 07:00 MR. PEABODY & SHERMAN Sat-Sun 01:40 FROZEN SING-ALONG Sat-Sun 01:10 ERNEST & CELESTINE SatSun 01:50

Moreland Theatre

6712 SE Milwaukie Ave., 503236-5257 THE GRAND BUDAPEST HOTEL Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 05:30, 07:40

7229 NE Sandy Blvd., 503282-2898 CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER 3D Wed 01:30, 04:45, 08:00 THE GRAND BUDAPEST HOTEL Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 12:30, 03:00, 05:30, 08:00

St. Johns Cinemas

8704 N Lombard St., 503286-1768 THE GRAND BUDAPEST HOTEL Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 04:30, 07:00, 09:20 CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 05:00, 07:55

CineMagic Theatre

2021 SE Hawthorne Blvd., 503-231-7919 THE GRAND BUDAPEST HOTEL Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 05:30, 07:40

Edgefield Powerstation Theater

2126 SW Halsey St., 503249-7474-2 THE MONUMENTS MEN 12 YEARS A SLAVE MR. PEABODY & SHERMAN Sat-Sun-Mon 06:00 BAD WORDS Sat-Mon-Tue 09:00

Kennedy School Theater

5736 NE 33rd Ave., 503-2497474-4 FROZEN Wed 12:00, 05:30 THE MONUMENTS MEN Fri-Sat-Mon-Wed 07:45 ABOUT LAST NIGHT Wed 02:30 MR. PEABODY & SHERMAN Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon 12:00 ROBOCOP Fri-SatSun 07:45 BAD WORDS Fri-Sat-Sun-Tue 02:30

Empirical Theatre at OMSI


5th Avenue Cinema 510 SW Hall St., 503-7253551 COME AND SEE Fri-SatSun 03:00 THE ASCENT Fri 07:30

340 SW Morrison St. TRANSCENDENCE Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:00, 04:30, 07:15, 10:00 A HAUNTED HOUSE 2 Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:50, 04:20, 07:30, 09:45 RIO 2 3D Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-TueWed 03:45, 10:10 RIO 2 FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:50, 06:40 OCULUS Wed 01:30, 04:10, 06:50, 10:15 CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 01:15, 04:00, 07:00 CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER 3D Wed 09:30 DIVERGENT Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 01:40, 04:45, 08:00 THE QUIET ONES Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 02:00, 04:50, 07:30, 10:15

St. Johns Theater

8203 N Ivanhoe St., 503-2497474-6 THE MONUMENTS MEN Wed 01:00, 06:30 ROBOCOP Wed 09:15 MR. PEABODY & SHERMAN Sat-Mon-Tue 06:30 BAD WORDS SatMon-Tue 09:00

Academy Theater

7818 SE Stark St., 503-2520500 BAD WORDS Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 05:15, 09:40 ENEMY Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 05:00, 09:15 300: RISE OF AN EMPIRE Fri-Sat-Sun-MonTue-Wed 02:40, 07:00 THE MONUMENTS MEN Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 02:50, 07:15 AMERICAN HUSTLE Wed 09:00 FROZEN Wed 04:30 PHILOMENA Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 02:20, 06:45 ERNEST & CELESTINE Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 05:10 MR. PEABODY & SHERMAN Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 05:00 THE WIND RISES Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue 02:35, 07:00

Living Room Theaters

341 SW 10th Ave., 971-2222010 13 SINS Wed 02:00, 09:55 CHILD’S POSE Fri-SatSun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:00, 02:30, 04:35, 07:15, 09:40 DRAFT DAY Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 12:15, 02:40, 04:25, 05:00, 06:50, 07:30, 09:45 JOE Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue-Wed 11:50, 02:15, 07:00, 09:25 THE FACE OF LOVE Wed 11:45, 09:10 THE MISSING PICTURE Wed 12:05, 02:20, 05:20, 07:50 THE UNKNOWN KNOWN FriSat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 12:25, 02:50, 04:45, 09:50 THE GALAPAGOS AFFAIR: SATAN CAME TO EDEN Fri-Sat-SunMon-Tue 01:15, 04:00, 06:50, 09:25 THE OTHER WOMAN Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 11:45, 12:30, 02:10, 03:00, 04:30, 05:20, 07:00, 07:45, 09:20, 10:00 HANSEL AND GRETEL Sun 12:00

Hollywood Theatre

4122 NE Sandy Blvd., 503281-4215 NYMPHOMANIAC: VOLUME II Wed 07:00, 09:30 THE GRAND BUDAPEST HOTEL Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue-Wed 07:15, 09:15 CINEMA PROJECT Wed 07:30 SILENT FILMS UNDER THE SKIN Fri-Sat-Sun-Mon-Tue 06:45, 09:00 GYMKATA IN HECKLEVISION Fri 09:30 COLOSIO: THE ASSASSINATION Fri 07:00


Willamette Week APRIL 23, 2014





























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WOMEN SEEKING MEN My vivacious, sexy, loving sister, Is in search of a companion. She will be relocating to Portland soon and would like to meet someone settled, and distinquished. Please mail to Classifieds 2220 NW Quimby, PDX,97210 mark BB


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Week Classifieds APRIL 23, 2014

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For a Moose in a tent On her birthday event: We wish we were with you, But our love, it is sent! Love, Mike G, Heefy, Frances, Kendra, Mocean, Matty, Mighky, and Wayne!

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503-445-2757 • ©2014 Rob Brezsny

Week of April 24




ARIES (March 21-April 19): If for some inexplicable reason you are not simmering with new ideas about how you could drum up more money, I don’t know what to tell you -- except that maybe your mother lied to you about exactly when you were born. The astrological omens are virtually unequivocal: If you are a true Aries, you are now being invited, teased, and even tugged to increase your cash flow and bolster your financial know-how. If you can’t ferret out at least one opportunity to get richer quicker, you might really be a Pisces or Taurus. And my name is Jay Z. TAURUS (April 20-May 20): You remind me of a garden plot that has recently been plowed and rained on. Now the sun is out. The air is warm. Your dirt is wet and fertile. The feeling is a bit unsettled because the stuff that was below ground got churned up to the top. Instead of a flat surface, you’ve got furrows. But the overall mood is expectant. Blithe magic is in the air. Soon it will be time to grow new life. Oh, but just one thing is missing: The seeds have yet to be sewn. That’s going to happen very soon. Right? GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Here’s an excerpt from “Celestial Music,” a poem by Louise Gluck: “I’m like the child who buries / her head in the pillow / so as not to see, the child who tells herself / that light causes sadness.” One of your main assignments in the coming weeks, Gemini, is not to be like that child. It’s true that gazing at what the light reveals may shatter an illusion or two, but the illumination you will be blessed with will ultimately be more valuable than gold. CANCER (June 21-July 22): Would you like to forge new alliances and expand your web of connections and get more of the support you need to fulfill your dreams? You are entering the Season of Networking, so now would indeed be an excellent time to gather clues on how best to accomplish all that good stuff. To get you started in your quest, here’s advice from Dale Carnegie: “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.” LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Does Jamaican sprinter Usain Bolt run faster than any person alive? As far as we know, yes. He holds three world records and has won six Olympic gold medals. Even when he’s a bit off his game, he’s the best. At the 2008 Beijing Summer Olympics, he set the all-time mark for the 100-meter race -- 9.69 seconds -- despite the fact that one of his shoelaces was untied and he slowed down to celebrate before reaching the finish line. Like you, Bolt is a Leo. I’m making him both your role model and your anti-role model for the foreseeable future. You have the power to achieve something approaching his levels of excellence in your own field -- especially if you double-check to make sure your shoelace is never untied and especially if you don’t celebrate victory before it’s won. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): In his unpublished book The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows, John Koenig coins new words that convey experiences our language has not previously accounted for. One that may apply to you sometime soon is “trumspringa,” which he defines as “the temptation to step off your career track and become a shepherd in the mountains, following your flock between pastures with a sheepdog and a rifle, watching storms at dusk from the doorway of a small cabin.” To be overtaken by trumspringa doesn’t necessarily mean you will literally run away and be a shepherd. In fact, giving yourself the luxury of considering such wild possibilities may be a healing release that allows you to be at peace with the life you are actually living. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): “The supreme pleasure we can know, Freud said, and the model for all pleasure, orgasmic pleasure, comes when an excess tension built up, confined, compacted, is abruptly released.” That’s an observation by philosopher Alphonso Lingis. I bring it to your attention, Libra, because I expect that you will soon be able to harvest a psychospiritual version of that supreme pleasure. You have been gathering and storing up raw materials for soul-making, and now the time has come to express

them with a creative splash. Are you ready to purge your emotional backlog? Are you brave enough to go in search of cathartic epiphanies? What has been dark will yield light. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): The potential turning points that might possibly erupt in the coming days will not become actual turning points unless you work hard to activate them. They will be subtle and brief, so you will have to be very alert to notice them at all, and you will have to move quickly before they fade away. Here’s another complication: These incipient turning points probably won’t resemble any turning points you’ve seen before. They may come in the form of a lucky accident, a blessed mistake, a happy breakdown, a strange healing, a wicked gift, or a perfect weakness. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): If you happen to be an athlete, the coming week will not be a good time to headbutt a referee or take performance-enhancing drugs. If you hate to drive your car anywhere but in the fast lane, you will be wise to try the slower lanes for a while. If you are habitually inclined to skip steps, take short cuts, and look for loopholes, I advise you to instead try being thorough, methodical, and by-the-book. Catch my drift? In this phase of your astrological cycle, you will have a better chance at producing successful results if you are more prudent than usual. What?! A careful, discreet, strategic, judicious Sagittarius? Sure! Why not?


PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Your body contains about four octillion atoms. That’s four with 27 zeroes after it. Believe it or not, 200 billion of that total were once inside the body of Martin Luther King, Jr. For that matter, an average of 200 billion atoms of everyone who has ever lived and died is part of you. I am not making this up. (See the mathematical analysis here: As far as your immediate future is concerned, Pisces, I’m particularly interested in that legacy from King. If any of his skills as a great communicator are alive within you, you will be smart to call on them. Now is a time for you to express high-minded truths in ways that heal schisms, bridge gaps, and promote unity. Just proceed on the assumption that it is your job to express the truth with extra clarity, candor, and grace.

FOR FREE ADS in 'Musicians Wanted,' 'Musicians Available' & 'Instruments for Sale' go to and submit ads online. Ads taken over the phone in these categories cost $5.

Learn Piano All styles, levels


VOICE INSTRUCTION Anthony Plumer, Concert Artist/ Voice Teacher. 503-299-4089.

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Changing the image of rescue, one animal at a time... Interested in adopting from the Pixie Project

CALL 503.542.3433

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): My interpretation of this week’s astrological data might sound eccentric, even weird. But you know what? Sometimes life is -- or at least should be -- downright unpredictable. After much meditation, I’ve concluded that the most important message you can send to the universe is to fly a pair of underpants from the top of a flagpole. You heard me. Take down the flag that’s up there, and run the skivvies right up to the top. Whose underpants should you use? Those belonging to someone you adore, of course. And what is the deeper meaning behind this apparently irrational act? What exactly is life asking from you? Just this: Stop making so much sense all the time -- especially when it comes to cultivating your love and expressing your passion. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): You need to take some time out to explore the deeper mysteries of snuggling, cuddling, and nuzzling. In my opinion, that is your sacred duty. It’s your raison d’etre, your ne plus ultra, your sine qua non. You’ve got to nurture your somatic wisdom with what we in the consciousness industry refer to as yummy warm fuzzy wonder love. At the very least, you should engage in some prolonged hugging with a creature you feel close to. Tender physical touch isn’t just a luxury; it’s a necessity.








Green Dog Pet Supply





Homework Some people ask, “What would Jesus do?” Others prefer, “What would Buddha do?” Who’s your ultimate authority? Testify at

check out Rob Brezsny’s Expanded Weekly Audio Horoscopes & Daily Text Message Horoscopes

The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at

1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700

If you or your business would like to sponsor a pet in one of our upcoming Pet Showcases,


MATT PLAMBECK 503-445-2757 Willamette Week Classifieds APRIL 23, 2014




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Ron For Your Lives!–that’s all you can do. instance? 55 “Pink Friday” singer Nicki 58 Not lopsided 59 Agreeable odor 60 Athletic competitions 61 Hearing aid? 62 “Catch Me If You Can” airline 63 Detective novelist ___ Stanley Gardner 64 Kicking org.

Portland’s Indie Rock Strip Club

HOTTEST GIRLS IN CHINATOWN 217 NW 4th Ave (503) 224-8472

Across 1 ___ Lanka 4 Beaver barriers 8 Like some phones or moves 13 “___ Dieu!” 14 “The Dark Knight Rises” director 15 Hall’s singing partner 16 Entanglement 18 Cuban dance 19 The result of turning dollar bill portraits into clouds? 21 Acts human?

catcher 37 Enjoy, like pretzels 39 Plenty 40 Small batteries 42 Article printed daily? 43 Where pigs find potential partners? 46 A bird in the bush 49 Find a job for 50 Some tests 51 “Agreed!” 52 24-hour marathon of Bruce Lee movies, for

22 “Jack Sprat could ___ fat” 23 Commuter’s option 26 “Man of a Thousand Faces” Chaney 27 Embarrassing reason that hospital gown won’t stay put? 30 Actress Sue ___ Langdon 31 Abbr. with a Spanish surname 32 Tiny amount 33 Farm’s mouse-

Down 1 “SNL” cartoon creator Robert 2 “Dawn of the Dead” director 3 Hereditary 4 Shiba Inu meme character 5 Good to go 6 Cocktails with umbrellas 7 Horses, at times 8 More or less 9 Haleakala National Park’s island 10 24-hr. device 11 1860s soldier, briefly 12 Scanning org. 14 Egg ___ 17 Monopoly quartet: abbr. 20 Moderately slow in tempo 23 Bibliophile’s item 24 “Do ___ others ” 25 Jazzman Getz 27 Card game with a colorful deck 28 Yanni fan, maybe 29 Jasmine, e.g. 30 Disapproving of

33 Erykah who sang “On & On” 34 “Poor me!” 35 Memorization 36 “Previously...” 38 “I get it” responses 41 Wood furniture worker 44 1990s arcade basketball game 45 “The House of the Spirits” author Allende 46 “My Name Is” rapper 47 Liquor made from agave 48 Indy-winning family 51 King or carte lead-in 52 “Baby ___” (Amy Poehler/Tina Fey movie) 53 Tardy 54 Agcy. that compiles the Occupational Outlook Handbook 55 “You Are Here” chart 56 Glass in the radio booth 57 Parisian turndown last week’s answers

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Week Classifieds APRIL 23, 2014


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Portland Florist Shop • Portland Bakery Delivery 11807 NE Glisan, Portland • 503-257-9165 McMenamins Edgefield


is now hiring Servers, Bartenders, Catering Captains, Hosts, Foodrunners and Bussers. The positions are pt-ft, seas position. Must have an open & flex sched including, days, eves, wknds and holidays. Must have high vol. restaurant exp and enjoy a busy customer service-oriented enviro. Please apply online 24/7 at www. or pick up paper app at any McMenamins location. Mail to 2126 SW Halsey, Troutdale, OR 97060 or fax: 503-667-3612. Call 503-952-0598 for info on other ways to apply. Please no phone calls/emails to individ locs! E.O.E.

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MORE CLASSIFIEDS Submit your art to be featured in Willamette Week’s I Made This. For submission guidelines go to


adidas International, Inc. seeks Lead Solutions Developer eCommerce in Portland, OR. Responsible for in house eCommerce Web development, Endeca development & hybris development. Apply online at, job #30962



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for sale at: East Bank Commerce Center Gallery, 1001 SE Water Ave. Portland



MCMENAMINS CORNELIUS PASS ROADHOUSE is now hiring LINE COOKS, PREP COOKS & DISHWASHERS! Qualified apps must have an open & flex sched including, days, eves, wknds and holidays. We are looking for apps who have prev exp related exp and enjoy working in a busy cust service-oriented enviro. We are also willing to train! We offer opps for advancement and excellent benefits for elig employees, including vision, med, chiro, dental and so much more! Please apply online 24/7 at www. or pick up a paper app at any McMenamins locations. Mail to 430 N. Killingsworth, Portland OR, 97217 or fax: 503-221-8749. Call 503-952-0598 for info on other ways to apply. Please no phone calls or emails to individ locs! E.O.E. Come to our McMenamins Cornelius Pass Roadhouse Job Fair, on Tues, April 29th, to fill out an app between the hours of 1pm and 4pm! Managers will be on hand to talk to interested apps. We are loc at 4045 NW Cornelius Pass Rd. Hillsboro, OR 97124.

McMenamins Edgefield

is hiring line cooks, pizza cooks, prep cooks, catering cooks and a baker for the Power Station Pub and Black Rabbit Restaurant. Prev high vol rest kitchen exp a MUST. Must have an open & flex sched; days, eves, wknds and holidays. Please apply online 24/7 at www. or pick up a paper app at any McMenamins. Mail to 2126 SW Halsey, Troutdale, OR 97060 or fax: 503-667-3612. Call 503-952-0598 for info on other ways to apply. Please no calls or emails. E.O.E.

Qualified apps must have an open & flex sched including, days, eves, wknds and holidays. We are looking for applicants who have prev exp related exp and enjoy working in a busy customer serviceoriented enviro. We offer opps for advancement and excellent benefits for eligible employees, including vision, med, chiro, dental and so much more! Please apply online 24/7 at www.mcmenamins. com or pick up a paper app at any McMenamins location. Mail to 430 N. Killingsworth, Portland OR, 97217 or fax: 503-221-8749. Call 503-952-0598 for info on other ways to apply. Please no phone calls or emails to individ locs! E.O.E.


is now hiring LINE COOKS! Qualified apps must have an open & flex sched including, days, eves, wknds and holidays. We are looking for applicants who have prev related exp and enjoy working in a busy customer service-oriented enviro. We are also willing to train! We offer opps for advancement and excellent benefits for eligible employees, including vision, med, chiro, dental and so much more! Please apply online 24/7 at or pick up a paper app at any McMenamins location. Mail to 430 N. Killingsworth, Portland OR, 97217 or fax: 503-221-8749. Call 503-952-0598 for info on other ways to apply. Please no phone calls or emails to individ locs! E.O.E.

Ruby Spa at the Grand Lodge in Forest Grove

is now hiring LMTs & Hair Stylists! Qualified apps must have an open & flex sched including, days, eves, wknds and holidays. We are looking for applicants who enjoy working in a busy customer service-oriented enviro. We offer opps for advancement and excellent benefits for eligible employees, including vision, med, chiro, dental and so much more! Please apply online 24/7 at www.mcmenamins. com or pick up a paper app at any McMenamins location. Mail to 430 N. Killingsworth, Portland OR, 97217 or fax: 503-221-8749. Call 503-952-0598 for info on other ways to apply. Please no phone calls or emails to individ locs! E.O.E.

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Willamette Week Classifieds APRIL 23, 2014




Do you want to be debt free? Call Now: 503-808-9032 FREE Consultation. Payment Plans. Scott Hutchinson, Attorney


9966 SW Arctic Drive, Beaverton 9220 SE Stark Street, Portland American Agriculture • PDX 503-256-2400 BVT 503-641-3500


Bankruptcy Payment Plans

Tax - Tenants - Small Business - More Sliding-Scale NONPROFIT Attorneys (503) 208-4079


$BUYING JUNK CARS$ $100-$2000 licensed and insured , Towing service available call Jeff 503-841-3415


2010 Class 4 Foodcart for sale. One owner/ in excellent condition/ was used as a bakery. Has passed inspections in Clackamas and Multnomah Counties.

Also willing to sell as a complete business. All equipment included. • 16’ long x 8’ wide. • Utilites: All Electric • 8 foot high ceiling. • Heated gray water tank (ready for winter). • 2 axle. • Oven • Serving windows off the side and the end. • Refrigerator


SUN-THRS 11–7, FRI–SAT 11–8. 909 N Beech Street, Historic Mississippi District 503-473-8018

Paying up to $30/box. Help those who can’t afford insurance. Free pickup in SW WA and Portland Metro. Call 360-693-0185

$12,500 Call: Jane

Comedy Classes

Improv, Standup, Sketch writing. Now enrolling The Brody Theater, 503-224-2227

Hayes 503-616-6571

20% Off Any Smoking Apparatus With This Ad! BUY LOCAL, BUY AMERICAN, BUY MARY JANES Glass Pipes, Vaporizers, Incense & Candles


7219 NE Hwy. 99, Suite 109

Learn from a Professional / Get the Skills • 503-438-8466

Vancouver, WA 98665

(360) 735-5913 212 N.E. 164th #19 Vancouver, WA 98684

Eskrima Classes

(360) 514-8494

Personal weapon & street defense or 503-740-2666

Guitar Lessons

Personalized instruction for over 15yrs. 503-546-3137

Hippie Goddess

Females 18+. Natural, Fit Bodies. Creative outdoor shoots for $400-$600. 503-449-5341 Emma

$Cash for Junk Vehicles$

Ask for Steven. 503-936-5923 Licensed/Bonded/Insured

1425 NW 23rd Portland, OR 97210 (503) 841-5751

6913 E. Fourth Plain Vancouver, WA 98661

8312 E. Mill Plain Blvd Vancouver, WA 98664

(360) 213-1011

1156 Commerce Ave Longview Wa 98632

(360) 695-7773 (360) 577-4204 Not valid with any other offer

1825 E Street

Washougal, WA 98671

(360) 844-5779

North West Hydroponic R&R

Opiate Treatment Program


Oregon Medical Marijuana Patient Resource Center

Evening outpatient treatment program with suboxone. We Buy, Sell, & Trade New & Used Hydro- CRCHealth/Dr. Jim Thayer, Addiction Medicine ponic Equipment. 503-747-3624 1-800-797-6237

Quick fix synthetic urine now available. Your hookah headquarters. Vapes. E-cigs, glass pipes, discount tobacco, detox products, salvia and kratom Still Smokin’ Tobacco For Less 12302 SE Powell 503-762-4219 Kaiser Permanente

*971-255-1456* 1310 SE 7TH AVE

Open 7 Days


A Linnton Feed & Seed Garden Store Historic Woodlawn Triangle at NE 8th & Deekum


503 235 1035

New Downtown Location! 1501 SW Broadway

4119 SE Hawthorne, Portland ph: 503-235-PIPE (7473)


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Program, Off Max near Clackamas Town Center 503-902-1105 Dr. Ray Tangredi Psychiatry/Addiction Initial 30 Minute Consultation Free


Dekum Street Doorway

• Gardening tools • Chicken feed • Soil & Mulch • Plant starts • and more!

• Dual ceiling fans. • Lots of counter top workspace • 3 bay sinks. • Excellent overhead storage racks • Separate hand washing sink. • Lots of handy cabinet space!

Willamette SUP Cup April 27th, 10am George Rogers Park in Lake Oswego

New 2014 SUPs in stock! SUP Rentals & Lessons

See website for more info 7400 SW Macadam, Portland

Mon-Fri 10-8, Sat 10-7



Ground defense under black belt instruction. or 503-740-2666


Medical Marijuana

card Services clinic

503-384-Weed (9333) 4911 NE Sandy Blvd, Portland • open 7 days

Pizza Delivery

Until 4AM!

40 25 willamette week, april 23, 2014  
40 25 willamette week, april 23, 2014