FOR THE REST OF US
ISS 32/JAN jan10.indd 1
/ ISSUE 50 . JULY / 2011 FOR THE REST OF US A new era of Jack is coming… Over the past few months we’ve been secretly tucked away at Who’s Jack HQ making some pretty exciting plots and plans for the future of Who’s Jack magazine and our online platforms. We can now reveal the results of our planning are three exciting new aspects that we’ll soon be launching under the Who’s Jack umbrella. The first of which is a brand new logo which you can already see on the front of this issue. Secondly, our existing website www.whosjack.org has been having something of a make over recently and we’ll be bringing you the new, improved, better-than-ever-before website in a matter of weeks. The site will not only look all sparkly and new it’ll also have a number of key differences and new features which we hope you’re going to love and that will help you feel an even bigger part of the Who’s Jack community. Lastly, we will also be launching a new website, WJTV, which will host video content from all the same subjects that we already cover within the magazine and online. Expect interviews, documentaries, behind the scenes footage from some of the cities biggest events, tour diaries, scripted programs and loads, loads more. If you like the sound of all of this, and we really hope you do, email us at firstname.lastname@example.org to be in with the chance to be sent a special preview log-on so that you can trial the new sites and let us know what you think before they’ve even gone live.
8. Fashion For The Boys Florals 11. Summer Casuals Men’s wear fashion story 22. Jack Loves Something Else 24. Jack Loves Handsome Clothing 25. Old Mater Style Layering boho style. 26. Pamm Hogg Fashion, art and everything in between. 30. Concrete and Bubblegum Women’s wear fashion story 40. Fashion Pick Of The Month
42. Introducing Alana Stewart. 43. Review One Liners / Lesser Knowns 44. Emeli Sande : Writing her future The lady who’s done collaborating and deciding to go it alone. 48. Independent Labels Our favourites. 49. Totally Enourmous Extinct Dinosaurs Putting the the performance back into the music. 54. Dave’s band Picks 56. Music Pick Of The Month
ART & DESIGN
58. Mark’s July Film Round Up The films you want to spend your money on this month. 62. Superhero Astrology Who is your superhero starsign and what does it mean? 64. I am jack’s Summer Dissapointment and Hope. Our new monthly feature piece from those boys over at Heyuguys. 67. Beautiful People The beautiful people of Hollywood and film. 69. Rory Culkin With Scream 4 under his belt what’s next? 71. Ben Newman Bright young directing talent. 74. Film Pick of The Month
77. Artist Introductions McBess 81. Art Spotter Eleanor looks at this months exhibition, The London St Photography Exhibition. 84. Art Pick Of The Month
LIFE & LONDON 86. Beauty Festival make up bag options for all budgets. 88. Return of the Nineties Yes, it’s true, the bright lurid colours and boy bands are back for good. 90. Perks and Perils Tamlin talks life. 91. Esme Riley The pain of trains. 92. Dating Neat and Polite. 94. Life and London Pick Of The Month
/ TEAM JACK / CONTRIBUTORS
Editor : Louise O-F email@example.com
Dept Editor : Laura Hills firstname.lastname@example.org
Film : Mark Williams email@example.com
Contributor: Jon Lyus
Illustrator: Lou Taylor
Comment : Adam Roan Henderson firstname.lastname@example.org
Music : James Lynch email@example.com
Film Online : Matt Hamm firstname.lastname@example.org
Layout: Jack Walker
Stylist: Rickardo Maxwell
Dating : Georgina Childs
Make Up: Luke Stephens
Music : Charlie Allen
Styling : Faye Heran email@example.com
Art: Eleanor Davidson
Styling : Jo Bevis firstname.lastname@example.org
Music: Rory Broadfoot
Columnist : Tamlin Magee
Columnist: Esme Riley
Contributor : Lara Piras
Contributor music : David Macnamara www.andeveryonesadj.com
Contributor : Matt Bass
Photographer : Tracer Ital
Photographer: James Lincoln
Photographer: Barry Macdonald
/ THE CREDIT STUFF
/ HOW TO GET INVOLVED
Cover Image : Tracer Ital Want to see your work in Jack? Contributions : email@example.com The Jack-Father : Edward Fitzpatrick //
Whether you are a band, a brand, a designer or simply want to tell us about something, get in touch. General enquiries can be sent to: firstname.lastname@example.org, contributions can be sent to: email@example.com, finally, advertising enquiries can be sent to: firstname.lastname@example.org.
Who’s Jack Magazine is part of a range of platforms that all come under the company Who’s Jack Ltd. This is the magazine and it is a monthly glossy both in print and online that covers art, fashion, film, music and general London and life. We aim to be attainable just as much as we are aspirational and never to talk down to our reader, you. We are what you’ve been waiting for.
Who’s Jack Ltd All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced in whole or in part with out the permission of Who’s Jack. The opinions expressed in this magazine are not necessarily the opinions of Who’s Jack. Who’s Jack Ltd can not be held responsible for any breach of copyright arising from any material supplied. Who’s Jack, 93 Barker Drive, Camden, London, NW1 0JG
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jack / STOCKISTS NORTH
Camden Blues Kitchen: 111 - 113 Camden High Street, NW1 7JN www.theblueskitchen.com The Old Queens Head: 44 Essex Road, Islington, N1 8LN www.theoldqueenshead.com The Hawley Arms: 2 Castlehaven Road, NW1 8QU www.thehawleyarms.co.uk The Lexington: 96-98 Pentonville Road, N1 9JB www.thelexington.co.uk The Keston Lodge: 131 Upper Street, N1 1QP www.kestonlodge.com The Lock Tavern: 35 Chalk Farm Road, NW1 8AJ www.lock-tavern.co.uk Shock and Soul: 46 Essex Road, Islington, N1 8LN www.shockandsoul.co.uk The Westbury: 34 Kilburn High Street, NW6 5UA www.westburybar.com Rokit: 225 Camden HIgh Street, NW1 7BU www.rokit.co.uk LCB Surf Store : 23 Chalk Farm Road, NW1 7RU www.lcbsurfstore.co.uk Edinboro Castle: 57 Mornington Terrace, NW1 7RU www.edinborocastlepub.co.uk Joy: 21-22 Upper Street, N1 0PQ www.joythestore.com
Rough Trade: 130 Talbot Road, W11 1JA www.roughtrade.com The Electric Brasserie: 191 Portobello Road, W11 2ED www.electricbrasserie.com Mau Mau Bar: 265 Portobello Road, W11 1LR www.myspace.com/maumaubar Portobello Music: 13 Allsaints Road, W11 1HA www.portobellomusic.net Smash: 268 Portobello Road www.sandmcafe.co.uk Defectors Weld : 170 Uxbridge Road, W12 8AA www.defectors-weld.com Size? - (in London stores): 200 Portobello Road, Notting Hill, W11 1LB www.size.co.uk
SOUTH Bar Story: 213 Blenheim Grove, Peckham, SE15 4QL Bullfrog: 20 Greenwich Church Street, SE10 9BJ www.bullfrogs.co.uk The Rest Is Noise: 442 Brixton Road, Brixton, SW9 8EJ www.therestisnoisebrixton.com Joy: Clapham Junction Station, SW11 1RU www.joythestore.com Banquet Records: 52 Eden Street, Kingston, KT1 1EE www.banquetrecords.com
EAST Paper Dress: 114-116 Curtain Road, EC2A 3AY www.paperdressboutique.blogspot.com Vintage Store: 182 Brick Lane, E1 6SA The Lazy Ones: 102m Sclater Street, E1 6HR www.thelazyones.blogspot.com Beyond Retro: 110-112 Cheshire Street, E2 6EJ 58-59 Great Marlborough Street, W1F 7JY www.beyondretro.com The Book Club: 100 Lenard Street, EC2A 4RH www.wearetbc.com Beyond Retro: 110-112 Cheshire Street, E2 6EJ 58-59 Great Marlborough Street, W1F 7JY www.beyondretro.com Behave: 14 Hanbury Street, E1 6QR LCB Surf Store: 121 Bethnal Green Road, London E2 7DG www.lcbsurfstore.co.uk Rough Trade East: Old Truman Brewery, 91 Brick Lane, E1 6QL www.roughtrade.com The Victoria: 110 Grove Road, Mile End, E3 5TH www.thevictoriae3.com Junk: Old Truman Brewery, Grey Eagle Street, E1 6QL Elbow Rooms: 97-113 Curtain Road, EC2A 3BS theelbowroom.co.uk Bar Music Hall: 134 Curtain Road, EC2A 3AR www.barmusichall.co.uk Rokit: 101 Brick Lane, E1 6SE www.rokit.co.uk Rough Trade: Old Truman Brewery, Grey Eagle Street, E1 6QL www.roughtrade.com Absolute Vintage: 15 Hanbury Street, E1 6QR www.absolutevintage.co.uk GShock Shop: Old Truman Brewery, Grey Eagle Street, E1 6QL www.g-shock.co.uk Smiths of Smithfield: 67-77 Charterhouse Street, EC1M 6HJ www.smithsofsmithfield.co.uk (weekends only)
CENTRAL Beyond the Valley: 2 Newburgh Street, W1F 7RD www.beyondthevalley.com 55 DSL: 10A Newburgh St, W1F 7RN www.55dsl.com Chateau Roux: 17 Newburgh Street, W1F 7RZ www.chateauroux.co.uk Tatty Devine: 44 Monmouth Street, WC2H 9EP www.tattydevine.com The Sun and 13 Cantons: 21 Great Pulteney Street, W1F 9NG Candy Cakes: Monmouth Street, WC2H 9EP www.candycakes.com Size? - (in London stores): Carnaby Street, Soho, W1F 7DW www.size.co.uk Size? - (in London stores): 37a Neal Street, Covent Garden, WC2H 9PR www.size.co.uk Fopp: 1 Earlham Street, WC2H 9LL www.foppreturns.com Mint: 20 Earlham Street, WC2 H9LN www.mintvintage.co.uk Sanctum Hotel: 20 Warwick Street Soho, W1B 5NF www.sanctumsoho.com The Hospital Club: 24 Endell Street, London, WC2H 9HQ www.thehospitalclub.com Beyond Retro: 58-59 Great Malborough Street, W1F 7JY www.beyondretro.com Sanctum Hotel: 20 Warwick Street, W1B 5NF www.sanctumsoho.com Joy: 1620170 Wardour Street, W1F8AB www.joythestore.com Volcom: 7 Earlham Street, WC2 9LL www.volcom.com Joy: 11 The Market Building, Covent Garden www.joythestore.com Rokit: 42 Shelton Street, WC2 9HZ www.rokit.co.uk Wesc: 53 Neal Street, WC2H 9PR wesc.com Miyson: 3 Lowndes Court, off Carnaby, W1F 7HD www.miyson.com
Also with online orders of Urban Outfitters : www.urbanoutfitters.co.uk See an up to the minute list of stockists online, if you would like to stock Whoâ€™s Jack contact: email@example.com All stockists have magazines delivered once a month in the first week of each month. We would advise getting to stockists early as they go quick.
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Photo: Vincent Skoglund
PLATTAN TANTO &
Available in 14 colors:
Feature 3.5mm standard microphone and remote.
James tries to dress the male and this month dares to bear arms and also a brave penchant for bright floral patterns.
It’s not just the things around you that change as you grow up; you do a fair bit of transforming, as you grow taller, hairier and inevitably wider as the years drag by. However, it’s not just in a physical form that you change; as you get older you mature, become more confident in yourself and hopefully learn a thing or two on your way. Tastes can change too and never is this more apparent than with alcohol, Marmite and short-sleeved shirts. For a long, long time I viewed the short sleeved shirt as the uniform of the embarrassing Dads, Geography teachers and over 60s of this world. But times change and so, as I have laboured over the point enough already, do people. I have recently been completely won over by the short-sleeved cousin of the more formal, regular and boring shirt. There is one shirt that I have been drawn to above all else: the Hawaiian shirt. I know I may be in danger of becoming a young version of Magnum P.I, with a less successful moustache and a smaller mobile phone but there is something ironically brilliant about a hideously bright, flowered short sleeve shirt. There is a timeless element to a Hawaiian shirt teamed with some crisp chino shorts and a nice pair of tan boat shoes. For those less inclined to look like an extra from an episode of TOWIE wannabe Made In Chelsea, luckily a Hawaiian shirt can look just as good in a muddy field in Somerset with just a pair of skinny black jeans and a rollie for company. Now for the pattern, while floral prints are a classic, try to steer away from the massive flowers favoured by surfers and students who wear flip-flops all year round. Instead have a look for something a bit subtler and preferably that at least looks like it could be vintage.
With that in mind it is, not unsurprisingly, our old friend eBay and vintage fashion stores such as the ever reliable Beyond Retro that have a great collection of genuine 80s monstrosities and if you feel lucky, I would even recommend checking out your local charity shops, especially if you happen to live in Miami (long shot I know.) The high street is also doing it’s bit to further the short sleeve Hawaiian revival and Paul Smith has arguably the most fantastic pattern, with the leopard featuring Northern Cascades print and Topman are taking things even further, clashing horrible patterns, quite literally, all over the shop. With even high street behemoths such as Next and Debenhams getting in on the act there is really no excuse not to channel you inner Crockett or Tubbs. Of course, those feeling that their masculinity may be threatened by flowers can opt for any other print as long as it either has a beachside theme or some kind of ridiculous nod to the geometric splashes of 80s casual wear. If you’re still not entirely convinced then I would definitely go for a short sleeved denim shirt or even a classic button down Oxford in pastel colours… basically as long as you can start developing a fetching farmers t-shirt tan as soon as you step out of the door then you are on the right track. Now just to hit the gym so people aren’t disappointed when they get their invitation to the gun show.
CORDUROY WAISTCOAT – BURBERRY | NARROW COLLARED SHIRT – BEN SHERMAN
Photographyer : Charl Marais Styling : Justin Jurd Make up & Hair : Bianca Hartkopf Model : Sean van Schoor @ Next Assistant : Jacobus Snyman
STRIPED SHIRT – PAUL SMITH | ROLL-UP TROUSER – PAUL SMITH | VINTAGE BRACES – STYLIST’S OWN | BELT – KURT GEIGER | LEATHER LOAFERS – CARVELLA
HENLEY BUTTON DOWN VEST – CALVIN KLEIN | VINTAGE FARMER BRACES – STYLIST’S OWN | NARROW TWEED TROUSER – BURBERRY
TRENCH COAT – DANIEL ALESSANDRO HOMME | MANDARIN SHIRT – DANIEL ALESSANDRO HOMME | PLEATED SUIT TROUSER – CALVIN KLEIN | STRAW SUN HAT – STYLIST’S OWN
STRIPED SHIRT – PAUL SMITH DROP CROTCH CHECK PANT - BURBERRY
TWEED VINTAGE BLAZER – PAUL SMITH | VELOUR TEXTURED PANTS – CALVIN KLEIN | V-NECK T-SHIRT – DISSIDANT | BOWLER HAT – STYLIST’S OWN | BRACES – STYLIST’S OWN | BOOTS – MICHAEL KORS
LINEN WAISTCOAT – HUGO BOSS TUXEDO STYLE SHIRT - PRINGLE CIGARETTE PANT – BEN SHERMAN BELT – PAUL SMITH
ith upside down text all over their highly visual website it’s no wonder we had to check out Something Else. The brand, a subtle mix of high fashion and street wear has now definitely caught our eye. Full of comfy casuals for this summer the brand will turn into a wardrobe staple no matter what item you have, in no time. The brand is run by designer and artist, Natalie Wood who previously founded the cult label, Sample and is still the Creative Director of women’s wear for skate wear label, Insight. The label was set up by Wood to combine creative disciplines and collaborative collections with many artists such as Deanne Cheuk, Skullux and Fontaine Anderson to name but a few.
All this influence, collaborative effort and experience has come together to create an offering that will scare no one but excite those who like to experiment with their look. In short a great place to position a label, enabling the wearer to feel like they are wearing a high end item that has not broken their bank balance nor made them feel uncomfortably ‘out there’ with their look. So onto the current collection. We have had a good leaf through the spring summer look book and picked out our favourites. Middle of Nowhere is the name of the new collection that is based on the natural environment, but a barren, desolate one lending to muted colours and floppy fabrics.
The mantra for the range’s aesthetic is ‘dust, light, creation, evolution, future’. The brand is much like a women’s only Allsaints with added excitement when it comes to colour and pattern. The collection is made up of lightweight Ts, draped shift dresses and perfectly cut shorts using textured linen, bio burnouts, slub cotton, raggy rayon and washed back tencel. This collection is now available all over Europe now and you can find them online at ASOS. www.something.net.au
andsome clothing bring out it’s Teachers range, a collection of perfectly fitting black and white Graphic Ts. Masters in the wash print T the graphics on these Ts range from totally subtle logos to large bold images though always staying soft. Handsome clothing have a way with shapes and shades that create the most subtle, expensive looking designs which is why we like them. The team behind the brand set out to redefine the word ‘handsome’ aiming to make it about being ’well-rounded and living life authentically regardless of sex, race, religion or any of the other various words people use to divide humanity.’ As Handsome tells us - ‘ The Handsome person is inspired by music, design, philosophy, and anyone creating original art in the various forms that it reveals itself in. They appreciate the living form of a big city without forgetting the importance of experiencing nature. They devour information and culture to not only be informed but to learn.’ And the Handsome site adds to this statement well, providing an updated blog with imagery, remixes and inspirational art weekly. www.handsomeclothing.com
e are bringing you the glorious world of layered boho this month. These chicks in Botticelliâ€™s, The Return of Judith to Bethulia, Sandro have got it right with their drapes and thin belts and ties and this summer you can too if you take a leaf or rather a cleverly draped bit of fabric from them. It is always a worry with layering baggy, floppy clothes that you will end up looking larger than you actually are in them but if you stick to showing shoulders and necklines and add accessories like belts, necklaces and ties in the right places, i.e all your smallest places, you can bring it all in a treat. For examples that bring it all up to the modern day you only need look at the label Free People that can offer you every baggy T, long necklace, thin cardigan and crochet top you could ever want.
OLD MASTER STYLE The Return of Judith to Bethulia, Sandro Botticelli
How to wear it like the oldies.
At the recent Vauxhaul Art Car Boot that went down, as always, a storm, we managed to have a catch up with car booter Pam Hogg about what she will be showing and selling and why she likes to be involved in the project.
Could you briefly tell us how you got involved with the art car boot as you have participated with the art event a number of times now?
A…When I went to the first art car boot to see what Sarah Lucas, Matt Calishaw and all the other first timers had on offer I loved it and was asked if i’d like to be part of it the following year.
Why do you feel it is a good event to be involved in?
Its a great day out for both seller and buyer, the excitement of a day at the races but your car’s stationary.
What can we expect from you this year?
Pam Hogg printed I-con T-shirts, china mugs, badges pocket mirrors and signed 6 track Hoggdoll CDs. plus a few small archive pieces.
WJ When we will see your next collection come and what can we expect from it?
I just showed my collection at London Fashion week, you can check it on line pamhogg.com my website is coming soon, will try to get some more info up on the start up page before the fair!
If there was one piece of art you could own what would it be?
Probably a renaissance piece, a chunk of Giotto Fresco from Assisi or a golden gem by Piero della Francesca or maybe I’d own a triptych by Hieronymus Bosch. Something with gold in it for sure.
new works he’d done that I hadn’t seen. Will be first in line for his next show!
Finally what is your Most played song on your iPod?:
Pam Hogg I don’t possess an ipod.
WJ Favourite colour?
My favourite colour is forever changing.
WJ Summer must have?
If there was one item of clothing that you would recommend for the summer what would it be?
Summer must have a surprise somewhere.
A yashmak to keep off the sun.
Who are your favourite artists currently?
Difficult question, but when I googled Matt Collishaw’s name to check that I’d spelled it correctly for one of your first questions, at a glance I was reminded of how good he was and astonished at what great
What mantra do you live by?
I don’t have a mantra but my motto is be fair and fearless.
CONCRETE AND BUBBLEGUM Photographer- Trace Ital Stylist-Rickardo Mattocks-Maxwell Make-up and Hair artists-Urim and Chloe Han using Armani cosmetics Stylist assistant-Victoria West Models- Shirley @ Nevs models and Anna F
ANNA WEARS : JUMPER-BEYOND RETRO / TEE-AMERICAN APPAREL / SHORTS-BEYOND RETRO AND SHOES- BRICK LANE MARKET. SHIRLEY WEARS : JUMPER-BEYOND RETRO / TEE-AGI & SAM / SHORTS-BEYOND RETRO / SHOES AND SUNGLASSES-BRICK LANE MARKET.
SHIRLEY WEARS TOP-MIGH-T BY KUMIKO WATARI, SHOES-BRICK LANE MARKET, SHORTS, JUMPER AND SOCKS ALL BY AMERICAN APPAREL.
SHIRLEY WEARS JUMPER-BEYOND RETRO AND SUNGLASSES-STYLIST’S OWN.
SHIRLEY WEARS TEE-AGI & SAM,SHORTS-BEYOND RETRO, SHOES AND SUNGLASSES-BRICK LANE MARKET. ANNA WEARS TEE-AMERICAN APPAREL, SHORTS-BEYOND RETRO AND SHOES- BRICK LANE MARKET.
SHIRLEY WEARS DRESS-BEYOND RETRO AND SUNGLASSES-BRICK LANE MARKET.
ANNA WEARS DRESS- LIPSY, SHOES-VANS, RING-DISNEYSTORE AND HEADPHONES-WESC. SHIRLEY WEARS DRESS-BEYOND RETRO, SHOES-CONVERSE, WATCH-LIPSY AND SUNGLASSES-BRICK LANE MARKET.
SHIRLEY WEARS SLEEVELESS TEE-MIGH-T BY KUMIKO WATARI, SHORTS-AMERICAN APPAREL AND WATCH-LIPSY.
PICK OF THE MONTH
Oakley Partners With Oki-Ni Oakley have been making large attempts of late to bridge the gap between their brand being seen as a sports only or tacky aviator option and a strong fashion contender. It seems after trying their hand at getting involved in music and doing a few event led campaigns and tents at the festivals last year Oakley have taken a step in the right direction and teamed up with Oki-ni. Together they have come up with these two iconic Frogskin and Eyeshade frames. The glasses are £100 a pair and both show off equally the influences from both Oakley and Oki-ni. www.oki-ni.com www.uk.oakley.com
Neon’s Back If These neon accessories above are anything to go by (Neon Clutches From Jimmy Choo,Neon perspex bangle from ASOS and pink blazer from Zara) then we are about to have a wave of neon. It seems the best way to avoid looking like something that Cyber Dog has puked on is to keep the neon to a minimum. Only one colour, only one accessory/item.
Nike 1948 Store Re-opens After a big fat re-furb the Nike 1849 concept store re-opened last month to the delight of all. Ready to re-claim its place that the cutting edge of street fashion, music and creativity Nike decided that there was no holding off any longer after multiple put backs. There are shop areas, libraries, cinemas and a whole calendar of talks, activities and events lined up. images : The Daily Street
Production Co-ordinator : The Outnet Net-A-Porter NET-A-PORTER is an established global Internet retailer of cutting edge luxury fashion labels relied upon for its exceptional quality of service and eye for the next big thing. firstname.lastname@example.org PR & Marketing Intern Rigby & Peller Rigby and Peller is a luxury retail brand which specialises in lingerie. Renowned for its exceptional quality and customer service, Rigby & Peller was established in 1939 and we currently hold the Grantee of Royal Warrant as Corsetiere to H.M. Queen Elizabeth II. email@example.com
Swagger’s 12 Year Anniversary For Swagger’s 12 Year anniversary they have teamed up with Japanese brand and accessory label Garni to create a limited edition jewellery line to celebrate their 12 years. This Skull ring is part of the collection, it features distinct ‘SWG’ lettering on the back and comes in a commemorative leather case. Available in brushed and polished variations and retailing at around £290. www.choiceisyours.jp
INTRODUCING ALANA STEWART
I am… a young woman, trying to live life with no regrets in a society where I can, unfortunately, do anything I want. I grew up in…
a military town called Niceville, FL. Then my mom remarried and we moved to San Francisco.
My childhood was mainly…filled with
memories of warm sand getting stuck in my swimsuit, catching hermit crabs, and poking jelly fish.
The three words I’d use to describe my music are… pro-human, portrait, folk
In the next few months I will mainly… honour and promote my EP ‘The Misuse of Chemistry’, visit my boyfriend’s family in Sweden, try not to sabotage the relationships and work I’ve made thus far.
You will like my music if you…
want to be a mother.
You wont like my music if you…
hanging out with the wrong people.
The best review I could read about my music is… Haven’t thought about it.
I mainly write about…
people I miss, what kind of daughter/partner/mother I want to be.
I would love a review that inspires other people to listen to the music, but I’m much more interested in the writing and recording process than the promotion and praise bits.
My big break in music came when…
The biggest lesson I’ve ever learnt is…
My English manager found me in the NY subway. She’s the closest thing to an angel I’ve ever experienced.
I’ve been writing songs since I…
got bored with karaoke and started breaking up with boys.
The first song I wrote was about… sneaking my boyfriend into my room. It was called ‘Don’t Cough’.
I find inspiration from… days by
myself where I have nothing to do and no-one to bother me.
I would describe fans of my music as…
I’ll tell you the one I’m recently clinging to: Preserving the dignity of others. Always always spare your enemy from indignity. Let them keep their grace, even if you’re trying to kill them.
My motto is…
Higher standards. I’m overcoming my natural laziness and doing my best to define and improve upon everything I do. I need the mantra constantly.
I couldn’t make music without… don’t even make me think of a scenario where I couldn’t make music. That’s much too depressing. You can next come and see me live in London at… The Old Queen’s Head (June 10th and 30th).
The one thing you need to know about me is…I love you.
BIN: Dev Bass Down Low
Having role models and being inspired by someone else and their actions to further achieve in your own endeavours is not something I would ever discourage… except when your name is Devin Tailes and your inspirations are apparently Ke$ha and The Black Eyed Peas, who you not only shamelessly imitate but also actually name check in an insanely irritating slice of stuttering synth-pop from the same ‘musicians’ who produced Like A G6. www.myspace.com/devishot
BIN: Swedish House Mafia (Feat. John Martin) Save The World Tonight
I hope that he had nothing to do with the writing of this song because not even the sweet tones of John Martin from Miike Snow can save this uninspired mess of electro from that smug band of professional poseurs and European button fiddlers that call themselves Swedish House Mafia (who are also the least threatening crime family since The Trotters). www.swedishhousemafia.com
BURN BURN: Jakwob (Feat. Smiler) Right Beside You
On the basis of this track, the normally darkly Dubstep-tinged Jakwob has been on something of a revelatory journey across the world to ‘find himself’ but instead of returning with a stupid tribal tattoo, hair braids and a collection of increasingly similar and boring stories and photos, he has crafted a finely balanced collision between Eastern strings, squelchy bass and live drums, topped off with London spitter Smiler’s swift, no-nonsense vocal delivery. www.jakwob.com
Music Review One Liners
BOOM: SBTRKT (Feat. Yukimi Nagano) Wildfire
SBTRKT is thankfully better at producing electro music then they are at spellings and they also have some pretty impressive friends to call on if this guest spot from Little Dragon’s Nagano is anything to go by. While the song writing may be basic and at times rather predictable, Nagano’s soulful voice and one seriously old school bass line makes this quite the ‘banger’ as one Tim Westwood might say, although probably not exactly like that and with more explosive sound effects. www.sbtrkt.com
BOOM: Mount Kimbie Carbonated EP
Post-dubstep darlings Mount Kimbie have taken the bongo-led Carbonated from their debut album Crooks and Lovers and used it as the inspiration and focal point for this new five track EP of remixes from the likes of new boy Klaus and James Blake’s mate Airhead but the boys are also spoiling us like a Ferreo Rocher loving ambassador by including two brand new tracks which will do nothing to damage their reputation and everything to increase the expectation surrounding their follow-up album. www.myspace.com/mountkimbie
BURN: Reptar Oblange Fizz Y’all EP
Taking your bands name from a toy T-Rex that is the favourite toy of Nineties cartoon babies The Rugrats is a strange, if not ill-advised, decision but giving your debut EP this even more ridiculous title is either stupidly brave or bravely stupid. Thankfully these much-hyped and hyperactive Americans have the music to transcend their rather questionable moniker choices and with Animal Collective producer Ben H Allen, Reptar have created a record that showcases just why no one was left standing when they played SXSW this year… www.myspace.com/reptarathens
Solar Harking back to the age of BritPop, come this five-some from London with enough confidence to keep the swagger alive. Their sound is a little Charlatans-esque; draining The Verve through a Stone Roses sieve to create something a little more complex. www.myspace.com/bornblondeofficial Download: Solar
Paul Thomas Saunders If you’re after a new favourite voice then dear Paul’s may well be it. Armed with beautifully haunting vocals, that hang in the air with powerfully ethereal tone; the Leeds born singer looks set to blow the bloody doors off the music industry. Quite simply...stunning. www.myspace.com/paulthomassaunders Download: Samarra
Givers Prep-rock is back with this Louisiana lot who craft themselves from the coat tails of Vampire Weekend. Expect stuttering guitars, walls of ever building sound, unavoidably infectious tracks and enough pastel colour to guarantee a Princeton education. www.myspace.com/givers Download: Up Up Up
Emeli Sande . - Writing her future You may not recognise her face yet but the chances are that youâ€™ll find her voice familiar. Despite the fact that Emeli Sande has never released a solo single her collaborations with the likes of Wiley (on his track Never Be Your Woman) and Chipmunk (Diamond Rings) have earned her two top ten singles as well as recognition from the music industry as one of this countries brightest new singing tales. Weâ€™ve been hearing quite a bit of buzz about Emeli for a while now originally coming to our attention on one of the tracks on Tinie Tempahâ€™s album, Let It Go, which featured alongside his collaborations with the likes of Ellie Goulding, Swedish House Mafia and Labrinth.
words : Laura Hills : images : Alexandra Catiere
After doing some digging around we realised that this wasn’t her first dabble with the music industry, as well as her previously mentioned chart success Emeli had written songs for other acts including Cheryl Cole, Devlin and Professor Green. Now, over a year later, she’s about to release her first debut single, Heaven and is putting the finishing touches to her first solo album so we sat down for a chat with the woman that’s being dubbed the artist that others will be compared to for years to come… Despite being new to the music industry as a solo artist 24-year-old Emeli acts like she has all the confidence of a well established artist who’s been releasing songs and doing interviews for years rather than months. When we meet her she is on a high after attending the Alicia Keys black ball, a charity event attended by a whole host of A-listers, to watch her
label mate Tinie Tempah perform. ‘I’m hoping next year it’ll be me up on that stage singing in front of all those people,’ she laughs before going on to tell me how even though she’s classically trained in both piano and the clarinet and has just taught herself the cello her main passion is writing songs. ‘I’m all about the lyrics, that’s why I started off as a writer for other artists,’ says Emeli. ‘I’ve been writing songs ever since I can remember and so even though I took a break from it to go to medicine at university it’s always stayed a passion of mine.’ Even though she’s always wanted to be a musician Emeli took a break from trying to make it in the industry to pursue her other passion, studying, and went on to study neurology at university. ‘I loved studying but I had writers block the whole time I was there. I realised I was too busy to concentrate on my music so I decided to give up and try my hand at being a singer. I can actually still remember the first song I wrote when I was a kid, it was about how life is a stage and how people are always judging us. It was pretty profound for someone so young.’ Growing up in Aberdeen and eventually moving to Glasgow Emeli always felt like the music industry was just out of her grasp and so two years ago she decided to up sticks and move to London’s Whitechapel. ‘It’s so hard to get any attention in the music industry if you live outside of London and even though Glasgow has a fairly inspiring, ever-growing music scene I knew if I really wanted to make it then I had to get to where all the action was,’ explains Emeli. ‘I like being here because it means I can keep an eye on my competition.’ It was once she moved to the City that she finally started to get her break in the industry. Despite her and her mum both sending demos to various labels and radio stations (Trevor Nelson played one of her tracks when she was 16 after she sent him a track) it wasn’t until she up rooted herself to London that she was spotted at a gig by the producer Naughtyboy. At the time Naughtyboy was working with the likes of Wiley, Chipmunk and Drake and spotted something in the young singer that he thought was special. ‘We started writing and recording tracks together and then he eventually got me the spot on the Chipmunk single and that’s when everything really started to take off for me.’ It wasn’t long before she was being asked to write tracks for other artists and was quickly snapped up to collaborate on several other tracks. ‘The first person I was asked to write for was Cheryl Cole, I did a track for her album,’ says Emeli. ‘It’s a bit easier to write for other people than for myself because there’s less pressure on me. They either like the song or they don’t. I’m much, much harder on myself when I’m writing a track that I’ll be performing because I’m quite a perfectionist.’ And it’s not just UK acts that the Scottish singer has been impressing. Just a few days before we meet for our interview Emeli took over the support slot on the London leg of the Alicia Keys tour. After hearing
some of Emeli’s tracks on the internet Keys got her people to phone Emeli to ask her to open for her. ‘It was unexpected to say the least. Unfortunately I didn’t actually get around to speaking to her because I was too nervous to approached her because I didn’t want to come off like some groupie but I’m going to start working with some of her team on some songs which I am super excited about.’ For now though Emeli’s main concentration is being spend on the release of her debut single, a track called Heaven which has already been play listed on several radio stations an impressive two months before it’s release date on 15th August. Speaking to some of the people who work at her label (the Sony Records imprint EMI) it doesn’t take long to realise that there’s a real buzz around her at the moment and they can’t wait to watch her succeed. ‘Even though I’ve heard the single loads of times before it still gives me goose bumps,’ says one of the girls who works at the label before adding, ‘this girl is going to be massive, I just know it’. ‘The response to Heaven has been really flattering,’ smiles Emeli. ‘I actually wrote the track a while ago now but I always knew I wanted it to by my first single. I had quite a tough time persuading the label to let me put it out at first because they didn’t think it was the right track to release as my first single but I stood my ground and eventually they gave in and let me have my own way.’ So now that she’s finally putting herself out there without the guise of another artist in front of her is she feeling the pressure 47 to succeed? ‘Big time! Having been in the charts with other people before and having success with their songs it’s now really weird to finally be stepping out on my own. But I’m excited to see what people think of me and how I’m received. Hearing my own song on the radio is just amazing too. I remember the first time I heard myself I was in Topshop and I just wanted to go up to all the staff and be like, ‘this is me!’ but obviously I couldn’t do that.’ Heaven will be the first single off of her new album, Our Version Of Events which is due for release in January 2012. ‘If people like Heaven then I think they’ll like the album because it’s a good bench mark for what my other music will sound like,’ explains Emeli. ‘So far I’ve had a good response from anyone I’ve played it to, the lyrics seem to really resonate with people and that’s great for me because I want to be seen as a good song writer. I’ve played it to a few of the guys I’ve collaborated with too and they’ve given it really positive reviews. I played it to Wretch 32 and his favourite song was one of the ballads which I was pleasantly surprised about. I feel now that everything I’ve been trying to achieve since I was young is finally coming together and although I’m scared I’m just keeping my fingers crossed that people like the music and get behind me.’
THE BEST OF INDEPENDENT RECORD LABELS In the past few years the independent label has grown stronger than ever, utilising the freedom they have staying clear of the majors to keep everyone on their toes. Here are just a few of our favourites. words : Laura Hills
including Fat Cat Records and Clean-Up Records who have launched the careers of the likes of Sigur Ros and Bijork. One Little Indian have always followed the motto of giving artists complete creative control over their records and because of that they’ve produced some of the highest selling singles, Eps and albums of the last 20 years. www.indian.co.uk
Domino Records Arguably the most successful of all the UK independent record labels, Domino have been the catalyst for recent successes such as The Kills, Arctic Monkeys and Franz Ferdinand and also boast the likes of Four Tet, Lightspeed Champion, Villagers and Wild Beasts on their roster. When the label was launched back in 1993 it was part of a £40 a week enterprise allowance scheme and quickly grew in popularity here in London. Domino Records (or Domino Recording Company to give it his full name) now has branches in America, France and Germany and has also helped launch the careers of post-punk bands like Young Marble Giants and Josef K. www.dominorecordco.com
edition releases of only 250 – 500 copies. After finding success with both their acts and also their hugely popular music blog Neon Gold have started a monthly pop/ electric club night called POPSHOP along side Absolut and gossip website Popjustice over in NYC but with their following over in the UK growing by the month we doubt it’ll be long before they’re putting on music nights on our fair shores. www.neongoldrecords.com
One Little Indian
Any independent label that can hold it’s hypothetical hands up and say, ‘we helped discover Marina and the Diamonds, Ellie Goulding and Passion Pit’ is definitely worthy of a mention. The boutique record label has offices in both New York and London and specialises in 7” records regularly putting out limited
Set up in 1985 by members of various punk bands One Little Indian has become a come-to for established artists that want to regain a bit of credibility (Paul McCartney recently went to the label and asked them to repackage and re-release his entire collection of solo material) and they now have several satellite labels
XL Recordings It was 1989 when Richard Russell, a successful producer, remixer and DJ decided to start his own record label which would later become the home of the likes of The White Stripes, Dizzee Rascal and Tyler the Creator. Over the past 22 years they’ve helped shape a sound of music that’s been inspired by Jamaican dub and reggae, European electronic music and the American urban scene and have stayed dedicated to the pirate radio, illegal raves and home recording scenes which so many labels shy away from. XL Recordings have also produced tracks for The Prodigy, Basement Jaxx, Jack Penate, M.I.A. and most noteably in 2006 Radiohead’s Thom York choose to release his critically acclaimed album, The Eraser, on the label. www.xlrecordings.com
Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs We meet the dinosaur (as his press people affectionately call him) on a sunny day in Regents Park. It’s a bank holiday Monday and the park is packed with half dressed groups of people and families playing games of Frisbee and queuing for ice creams. In amongst it TEED aka Orlando Higginbottom is looking for a quiet spot to get changed in to the costume he’s brought along for our photo shoot. We all wait patiently while he sits in the grass pulling beads, head pieces, feathers and bits of ribbon out of his Mary Poppins style bag which contains the items he needs to transform in to his alter ego, Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs (TEED), a one-man electronic act who has been gaining the attention of music fans and music industry insiders alike over the past few years for his inventive tunes, energetic stage presence and of course bizarre choice of attire. words : Laura hills | images : Barry Macdonald
After a quick change amongst some long grass he’s good to go posing in front of the camera with the confidence of a seasoned pro (despite the crowd of park dwellers who gather to watch ‘the man in the odd costume’ having his picture taken), once he’s done and has had a quick cigarette we settle down to discuss changing record labels, his first album, not taking himself too seriously and why he thinks his home city of Oxford has a better music scene than London… We meet TEED on what is a pretty big day for him, not only is he playing Camden’s Koko later that night but he is also heading off to the Radio 1 studio to find out if his next single, Trouble, has made it on to the stations play list. After the success of his first 3 EPs interest in the 25-year-old dance music maker has gone from strength to strength with backing from radio DJs such as Zane Lowe and
Annie Mac. He’s also signed a sparkly new record deal with Polydor Records (he was previously on Joe from Hot Chip’s label Greco-Roman) and is in the middle of finishing off his debut album. Looking back now it must seem bizarre that his big break came through a competition set up by the Tate Modern. ‘I was DJing at the time but I didn’t really like it. That whole scene takes itself too seriously, everyone’s so concerned with finding the next big tune or sound that it becomes pretty restricting,’ explains TEED. ‘I found this competition that the Tate Modern had put on where you had to write a piece of music inspired by a painting and decided to go for it. The competition itself didn’t really appeal to me but Huw Stephens and Felix from Basement Jaxx were on the judging panel so I thought it’d be a good opportunity to get my music in front of them.’ The gamble paid off and after fin-
ishing as a runner up in the competition TEED got some one-on-one time with the respected DJ Huw Stephens who liked him so much that he played one of his tracks on his show just two weeks later. ‘It was wicked, I was so grateful. After the song got played on his show people started getting in touch about my music and it all went from there.’ Growing up as the son of a music professor (his Dad teaches at Oxford) and in a house where he was taught to appreciate classical greats like Bach and playing the piano was one of his biggest passions it might seem surprising that dance music is the genre that TEED decided to go in to. ‘I’ve been making music my whole life and I’ve always been in to drum and base and jungle so it made sense to me to make that type of music. I’ve written other styles but dance is just what’s working best for me at the
moment,’ says TEED. ‘I started fiddling around on computers when I was about 12-years-old, I didn’t have a computer or a studio growing up but when I could borrow one or use one from school I’d spend my time trying to write stuff on it. Funnily enough I am rubbish with computers but with the few programs I use to make my music I know how to do what I need to in order to get by but no more than that. For a music producer I’m not very technologically advanced.’ Hailing from Oxford, which is better known for its indie bands than dance acts, TEED would play his local clubs, travelling to London only when he had to for performances. ‘I don’t really like London. People take themselves too seriously, my music is about letting yourself go and the people here don’t like to do that too much. It might come as a surprise but Oxford has always had quite a big rave scene but it’s always been a bit over shadowed by indie music. Ironically there are more dance nights in Oxford than live band nights.’ Signing to Greco-Roman saw TEED sitting amongst good company, the label is widely regarded as a spring board for underground talent and has helped launch the careers of some of the dance industries biggest names. TEED released three EPs through them before his plans for the future became bigger and grander than the fairly small independent label could accommodate for and so he moved on to pastures new over at Polydor Records where his label mates include the likes of White Lies, Delphic, Bright Eyes and Crystal Castles. ‘Greco-Roman was the perfect place for me to start out because they allowed me to be a bit weird and we built up a great relationship because of that. Dance music is the worst
genre for putting out mundane shit, loads of it sounds exactly the same or is totally uninspiring, but Greco-Roman never do that,’ he says. ‘Even though I had interest from a few other labels I knew that I was going to sign to Polydor from quite early on. It’s very flattering to have a label like that interested in me but it’s put a lot more pressure on me to succeed.’ At present TEED is putting the finishing touches to his debut album, which will be released at the end of this Summer. ‘To tell you the truth I’m in the middle of a crisis with it. When was the last time a big electronic dance album was released that people will listen to six months later?,’ he says before quickly answering his own question. ‘Years ago. I love the idea of an album being something that people can keep coming back to and that exists for a long time after it’s released but a lot of albums now don’t do that, they’re just PR and a reason to get in the press. The biggest problem is that a lot of dance music that’s been released over the past three years has been too ‘of the moment’ and no ones listening to it anymore. I’ve recorded loads of songs but now I’m wondering if I’m at the point where I need to scratch half of it and start again to make sure I get it right.’ His concerns about setting his music aside from his more commercial peers is
something that is touched upon quite a few times throughout our interview as is his desire to make music that doesn’t take itself too seriously something that is further shown in the previously mentioned outfit that he wears for the shoot. ‘How many DJs wear a T-Shirt, cap and trainers? I don’t want to be like them so I’m always looking for the next weird outfit I can perform in. It’s light hearted, I don’t want to take anything too seriously, there’s enough boring club stuff going on, I want to be different. If I look like an idiot on stage then it means people on the dance floor will be more relaxed. It always amazes me when people come up with me and say, ‘you know you’re names a bit weird?’, that’s kind of the point. I’m not trying to look cool or anything I promise.’ It is TEED’s quirky approach to making music and his shows (which are more like mini carnivals with dancers and fancy dress as far as the eye can see) that have gained him the respect of so many people in the music industry with one of his biggest champions being Annie Mac, something that TEED says took him totally by surprise, ‘I was incredibly shocked when Annie Mac decided to get behind my music and it made me want to get more of my songs on the radio. It got to the point where I started thinking that I should write more tracks that lend themselves to radio play then I stopped myself and realised that is the most ridiculous shit I’ve ever thought, I can’t do that!,’ he laughs. ‘The only people who can say, ‘I’m going to write a track that will definitely get on the radio,’ are Girls Aloud and lets be honest, I’m not some novelty act that can get away with things like that. I’m finally being taken seriously and I’m not about to mess that up.’
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DAVE’s Band Picks
(terrible title for a column.) words: David Macnamara
Melted Toys Melted Toys are a 3-piece synth-pop group from San Francisco, who have just put out a really great EP on Underwater Peoples Records (they also did me the favour of releasing Tennis’ Cape Dory last year, which was very nice of them) called Washed & Dried. They don’t have a drummer, but I won’t hold that against them, not that I have any great affection for drummers, more that well.... it’s a long story. Washed & Dried is a wonderfully inventive piece of lush keys, soaring synth lines and dreamy vocals. The combination of sparing piano riffs and effected guitars give these tracks a sound that isn’t a thousand miles removed from Washed Out or Toro Y Moi. Despite that, you can sort of tell that there is a conscious effort here not to sound TOO chillwave-y, and retain a little bit of scruffiness, like on the title track, or particularly on my personal favourite Portals, which is pushing my buttons. The big red button labelled ‘Likey!!’ in particular. Check out the Washed & Dried EP here: www.soundcloud.com/melted-toys/sets/washed-driedep-1
Clams Casino Clams Casino is the work of New Jersey producer Mike Volpe, who dropped an instrumental mixtape a couple of months ago that I’ve found myself repeatedly going back to, always finding fresh reasons to like it. His day job sees him create beats for Lil’ B and Soulja Boy, to name a few, but he’s also branched out and produced this excellent collection of atmospheric, abstract sound collages, that are a million miles away from anything he would normally be associated with. I’m not sure I buy into the idea of a gothic hip-hop genre, for a lot of people that just kind of blends into something approaching nu-metal, but Volpe is certainly doing something that is cinematic in it’s ambition and range, yet it’s roots can still be traced back and it’s influences are clearly worn on it’s sleeve. Check Clams Casino out at www.soundcloud.com/ clammyclams
Koreless Big Troubles This lot are from the States too (this isn’t deliberate!) but they are very much something I’m into right now, and they are also sounding very much like some of the best music that’s been coming over from the US for the last few months. They put out an album domestically in September and have been over in the UK recently touring. They are also the proud owners of one of the shittist websites, www.bigtroubless.angelfire.com I’ve EVER seen. It’s so bad, it’s good! Anyway if you like Pains In Being Pure At Heart and Crash by The Primitives is one for your favourite songs, then I’m pretty sure you will love this band. Right in the face! They seem to be from the school of melody over noise, yet can still remain lo-fi without losing any warmth or character in their recordings. Certainly a record that deserves to be smuggled into the country, inside a hollowed out rhinos foot. Check out more from Big Troubles at www.myspace.com/inbigtroubles
Lewis Roberts, aka Koreless, a 19-year old producer from Glasgow, is someone I’ve been following for a while now. He’s slowly putting out stuff of his own, as well as remixing people like Ghostpoet, New Look and Jacques Greene. His remix of Survive It cranks up the melancholy atmospherics until it’s almost suffocating, while his take on Jacques Greene’s The Look turns a pretty good house track into a post-club, street-lit joyride. It’s his hallmark, and finishing move. Every track sounds like it’s recorded in a room that is slowly filling up with smoke, bubbles and warm jelly, slowed down to a blissed, late-night electronic vibe. It’s James Blake, without being a massive load of shit basically. Imagine everything you read about that massive disappointment, except when you get around to listening to it, it’s so much more than a guy with a Fisher Price piano and a vocoder app on his iPhone! Find out more at www.soundcloud.com/koreless
Gigs This Month YAAKS 26.07.11 : Camp Bestival, East Lulworth, Dorset. 05.08.11 : Underage Festival , London
Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs
YAAKS I had YAAKS on my blog a while back, and it didn’t surprise me in the slightest when I saw them on the bill at Radio 1’s Big Weekend. Yeah they were on just before Big Dave Grohl...When I say just...Well they were on the Introducing Stage...So perhaps not as huge as one would be lead to believe, however surely big things await. If Friendly Fires can sell a couple of records, then there is hope for this 5 piece from Eastbourne. HRHRHYTHM is a pure student night classic in the making, while CAVALCADE (not sure what’s with all THE CAPITALS but....) is the band Foals would still be if they hadn’t gone all y’know....grown up. Where synths and guitars meet, there are some subtle horn samples that remind me of some really cheesy Ibiza tracks like Aloud’s Sex & Sun www.youtube.com/watch?v=jx5Y1TWVt4Q. Terrible, but equally brilliant at the same time. More on YAAKS here: www.soundcloud.com/yaaks
01.07.11 : The Beat Herder Festival, The ribble Valley, Lancashire 08.07.11 : Out To Gaze Festival, Fir Tree Country Park, Oxfordshire 08.07.11 : Lounge On The Farm, Canterbury 09.07.11 : Wakestock Festival, Cardigan Bay, North Wales 28.08.11 : SW4 Festival, London 10.09.11 : Bestival, Isle Of Wight
SBTRKT 14.07.11 : iTunes Music Festival (Live), London 06.08.11 : Field Day (Live), London 26.08.11 : Reading Festival (Dj), Reading 27.08.11 : Leeds Festival (Dj), Leeds 10.09.11 : Bestival, Isle Of Wight
Mount Kimbie 6.08.11 : Field Day 12.08.11 : Beacons, Skipton
Ed Sheeran 06.07.11 : London Scala 07.08.11 : London Scala 15.07.11 : Lovebox, London
Ghost Poet 01.07.11 : City And Arts Music Project, City Road, London
Hearts Revolution Hearts Revolution’s Mixtape has been getting a few spins in my office lately, under the guise that it is in fact a mixtape I made myself. I’m sorry to have to admit this, but I’m also pretty sure that NO ONE in my office will read this, so I can continue to live the lie, with no responsibility for the repercussions of my actions. It’s the perfect crime. Hearts Revolution are a New York 2 piece, well they’d have to be wouldn’t they since that’s where ALL the good 2 pieces come from. Ben and Leyla have been putting out singles and EP’s for a number of years now, but have finally gotten it together with a label of some description and are currently working on a debut album that will hopefully be released by the end of the year. And when it does, I’m going to tell everyone that I made it! Download the Hearts Revolution Mixtape at www.soundcloud.com/heartsrevolution/mixtape
03.07.11 : Old Blue Last, Great Eastern Street, London
Gaolers Daughter 07.07.11 : The Silver Bullet, 5 Station Place, London WEBSITES Alana Stewart : www.myspace.com/missalanastewart Emeli Sande : www.myspace.com/emelisande Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs : www.myspace.com/totallyenormousextinctdinosaurs
PICK OF THE MONTH
THE RETURN OF
THE GRIME MC words : James Lynch
Music Week Brings You Breakout Music Week rocks up at Proud to bring you Breakout, a monthly showcase for new and breaking acts picked by the veterans from Music Week themselves as well as All Night Long Promotions. The night will show newly signed talent to give you a taste of what’s coming next. The first event is on the 13th July and then the second Wednesday of each month thereafter. Breakout is also free to Music Week readers.
The grisly death of UK Garage gave rise to the dark world of Grime, which was at one point, roughly between 2004 and 2006, going to be the next big thing. But as with most of these things, the burgeoning scene turned in on its self and failed to live up to it’s own next hype. Undeterred, the MCs and producers that started it all have carried on and despite many of them becoming more mainstream-inclined, there are those that have stayed underground, honing their skills like a troupe of secret sonic ninjas. And the eventual resurgence of Grime may well be upon us if the current slew of single releases is anything to go by. Here’s my pick of the bad bunch: >>>>>>
The line up for the 13th includes Lonsdale Boys Club, I Am Harlequin, Jack Savoretti, The Violet May and a DJ set from White Lies. There will also be an acoustic stable with the line up yet to be announced. Get to the Music Week website to add your name to the guest list for free entry before 9pm.
Whilst working on their follow up album to their 2008, Headstunts The Datsuns have announced they will be doing a bit of touring. The mini tour will start on August 3rd in Birmingham and arrive in London to play Borderline on the 6th. Their fifth album is due for release towards the end of the year and was recorded in Stockholm by Nicke Andersson (Hellacopters) but is as yet untitled. www.thedatsuns.com
The album has just been released in the US with a UK release tbc. Universal Motwon Republic Group and Island Def Jam Music Group Chairman, Barry Weiss said of the deal - ‘G.O.O.D. Music is an exciting new chapter in the long and successful association of Kanye West and Island Def Jam’. www.defjam.com
As a founder member of successful Garage/Grime group More Fire Crew, the Bizzle and his mates reached an impressive chart position of seven with the classic Oi! way back in the day (or 2002 to be precise). And the general all round nice guy of Grime has been missing in action for some time since the release of his last album Go Hard in 2009. However, always one to make a loud entrance, Mind Spinning sees Lethal B’s triumphant return and is a heavy-hitting slab of dubstep bassline and rock chorus that proves the genre and it’s stalwarts are diversifying their talents while still staying unashamedly true to their dirty concrete roots. CD Is Dead
Datsuns Announce Tour Dates
A new worldwide label deal has been agreed between Kanye’s G.O.O.D Music Imprint and and Island Def Jam. The first album to come out on the label will be Big Sean’s debut feat.Chris Brown and called Finally Famous.
JME & Tempa T
Kanye West Signs Deal With Def Jam
JOBS Experienced Indie PR needed to run Decade PR Ideally you will have at least two years experience , can provide a list of media contacts that would confirm you as the right person for the job , and a passion to build the best indie rock PR service for our clients. Via Music Week website. Music Publishing Admin Assistant, Minder Music Experience of dealing with collection societies, song registrations and royalties is essential. firstname.lastname@example.org
JME is a Grime empire unto himself, having set up the successful label Boy Better Know with brother Skepta, he also has his fingers in a few grimy pies including Roll Deep, BBK t-shirts and numerous production jobs. Tempa T, on the other hand, seems to be a man who doesn’t take things too seriously (other than going to the gym). But both are big names in the grime scene and two MCs who consistently stay true to the undergrounds of ideals of Grime despite both branching out in their own ways, most recently with Tempz guesting on the current Chase & Status album. CD Is Dead is their latest verbal team up and comes complete with nonsense lyrics, a bouncing bassline and sinister synths.
Numbers In Action After three studio albums, a slew of chart-bothering singles, massive rivalry and feuding and not to mention more than enough trouble with the law, the ever-changing collective known as Roll Deep are still going strong. As their captain and figurehead, the Mc and producer, one time Pay As U Go member and consistently groundbreaking artist known as Wiley has returned to what he does best after his smash hit solo effort Wearin’ My Rolex from 2008. Gone are the house beats and radio-friendly choruses and instead Numbers In Action is a raw sound, more similar to the original dark and sparse ‘Eski-beat’ sound Wiley championed before Grime even existed.
Hobo With A Shotgun
FILM JULY words : Mark Williams
July it is then. Hopefully you’ve all got time to get to the cinema between your summer holidays and festivals and morris dancing. It’s not like the weather is going to provide any reason not to go there, this is Britain, we had our summer in April. Unless someone has swapped our geographical location with Spain, you’ll have plenty of chances to go sit in a large dark room and watch films. Phew. But, before we tell you what’s out this month, it’s been a little while now since our wonderful, and in no way despicable government decided they could do without the British Film Council. So how are we coping? Well, the wheels of British cinema do keep turning, and this year we have been treated to some great stuff; Submarine, Attack the Block, and the Hammer Horror film Wake Wood are among the best films from these shores this year. So, despite the sort of arts budget slashing that would suggest those in power would like us to live in a grey world of going to work, gormlessly watching X-Factor and paying our taxes like mindless automatons, creativity will out in the end.
Arrietty Captain America The Princess Of Monpensier
Sadly, creativity is something sorely lacking in certain corners of Hollywood
adly, creativity is something sorely
lacking in certain corners of Hollywood at the moment. Now, the odd remake here and there is bound to happen, and sometimes it can even be a good thing. But, there is an epidemic sweeping through Los Angeles at the moment, an epidemic which is causing movie executives to give the green light to remake most of the back catalogue of Arnold Schwarzenegger films! August is going to see Conan the Barbarian remade with someone that isn’t Arnie, and in the next year or two we are supposed to be seeing no less than Commando, Red Sonja, Total Recall and possibly even The Running Man remade with someone that IS NOT ARNIE. Now, Arnie may not be to everyone’s taste, but then some people actually like Robert Pattinson, so each to their own. (Although Arnie as Dutch in Predator taking on the angst ridden emo-vampires of Twilight would be fun to watch). But remakes have to at least stand a chance of being better than the original.
And more or less the whole point of most Arnie films is Arnold Schwarzenegger. So unless someone invents a time machine or reverse-ageing serum and applies liberally it all over the Governator, enabling him to reprise the steroid-enhanced roles of old, then please, for the love of God, just stop with the remakes! The Princess of Montpensier : 8th July www.ifcfilms.com/films/the-princess-ofmontpensier Ah those heady, 17th century days when matters such as the divided love of a lady between two suitors could be settled so simply, without the need for Jerry Springer. All it took was a leather glove to slap your foe across the face with, demand satisfaction and choose pistols at dawn, or a sword-fight in the courtyard. Admittedly, injuries caused by such settling of one’s grievances could be somewhat more serious than those caused by going on a daytime television chat show, but still, such passion!
The Princess of Montpensier is a French period drama, a classic sweeping romantic epic, coming complete with brooding Dukes and heaving bosoms. The film’s Princess is torn between her two suitors, a Prince to whom she is intended to be married, and a Duke who has swept her off her feet and into the bed-chamber. Jack Goes Boating : 8th July www.jackgoesboatingmovie.com Philip Seymour Hoffman makes his directorial debut, and if he directs as well as he acts then this should be a film well worth seeing. The story centres around two New York couples, one in the early awkward stages of their relationship, with Jack (Hoffman) receiving advice on the whole courting ritual from his married friend Clyde (John Ortiz). However, as things progress for Jack, Clyde’s marriage begins to slowly fall apart and the two relationships head in different directions.
Jack Goes Boating Light Thief
Hobo With a Shotgun : 15th July ca.hobowithashotgun.com Rutger Hauer stars in this surreal, incredibly violent action film about, unsurprisingly, a hobo with a shotgun. It began life in the same way as last year’s Machete, as a fake trailer that shown before the Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino directed Grindhouse films of 2007. These trailers were intentionally over the top and ridiculous, but of the five fake trailers, two have now been made into full-length films. The titular Hobo of the story arrives in Hope Town in order to get some money together to buy a lawn mower and start a grass-cutting business, but soon crosses paths with some of Hope Town’s more unscrupulous population. It is a town being run by the criminals, with the police bribed into submission, and so Rutger Hauer, whose character is known only as Hobo, has to take certain matters into his own hands. With a shotgun of course. Horrible Bosses : 22nd July www.imdb.com/title/tt1499658 Ever had a really crappy day at work? So crappy in fact, that you’ve wanted to murder your boss? Well, maybe murder is a bit further than most of us would go, but not so in the case of Nick (Jason Bateman), Dale (Charlie Day) and Kurt (Jason Sudeikis) who all have bosses that have pushed them just a little too far. So they team up and hatch a plan to have their daily tormentors killed, in this comedy, directed by Seth Gordon, who
was also responsible for the fantastic documentary King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters. The cast is pretty impressive too, with the evil bosses played by Kevin Spacey, Jennifer Aniston and Colin Farrell with a dodgy comb-over. Captain America : 29th July www.captainamerica.marvel.com Set in 1942, during the height of World War Two, Steve Rogers, played by Chris Evans (from the Fantastic Four, not BBC Radio 2) wishes to sign up to the US Army and do his bit to stop Hitler and his hordes from running amok. However, he is a bit scrawny and so does not pass the medical examination to enable him to enlist. Cue the opportunity to take part in Project: Rebirth, a top secret military operation to turn weedy little guys like Steve into big, buff, all-American supermen! Rogers undergoes the operation, and comes out of it to successfully become Captain America, leading the way in the fight against the sinister Red Skull (Hugo Weaving), Hitler’s head of advanced weaponry. As hit and miss as comic-book superhero films can be, Captain America looks like a lot of fun, and bloody well should be with a budget of $140 million! The Borrower Arrietty : 29th July www.karigurashi.jp This new Japanese animé comes from Studio Ghibli, which, as fans of animé will know, is a very good start. Studio Ghibli are responsible for a vast number of the
international successes in the animé genre over recent years, such as Howl’s Moving Castle, Spirited Away and Princess Mononoke. The Borrower Arriety is based on English book The Borrowers and isn’t the first time the book has been adapted for film or TV. Therefore, the storyline is primarily concerned with the lives of a group of people who are 10cm tall, and live under the floorboards and in the walls of normal houses. As we have come to expect from Studio Ghibli, and be spoilt rotten by, the animation is stunning, grandiose, hand drawn magic from the hands of some very talented people. The Light Thief : 29th July www.derdiebdeslichts.de (German website) It’s not very often we get to see a film from Kyrgyzstan, but The Light Thief has had enough praise at home and abroad to see it being given a decent distribution on the world cinema circuit, and deservedly so. Ostensibly about a popular and friendly electrician known as Mr Light who uses his expertise to grant the incredibly poor townsfolk cheap electricity, but also with stark overtones of the malaise that has befallen many of the former soviet bloc countries since the fall of communism. It is a beautiful looking film, and a touching story of the underdog, doing all he can for his friends and family to help them through rough economic times, with little thought for himself or how unpopular his actions make him with the authorities.
Superhero Astrology DAVID BOWIE ONCE SANG
‘I’M NOT A PROPHET OR A STONE AGED MAN, JUST A MORTAL WITH THE POTENTIAL OF A SUPERMAN’. words : Mark Williams
Wise words indeed. Because after much research, cross-referencing signs of the zodiac with alignment of planets, and a couple of phone calls to Sir Patrick Moore, we stargazers at Who’s Jack have managed to prove that you all have the potential of a Superman. Or perhaps Wolverine, or maybe even The Hulk. Within each of us resides at least the tiniest smidgen of the defining characteristics of our favourite superhero. Whether it be the inventive ingenuity of Iron Man, the ability to blend into the shadows like Batman, or just the teen pre-occupation with the opposite sex of Kick-Ass. The summer months are that time of year when we see a barrage of Superhero films flying into the cinemas faster than a speeding bullet. Why, in May we had Thor, June was X-Men: First Class and the Green Lantern, and July brings with it Captain America: The First Avenger. That’s more caped crusaders than you can shake a stick of kryptonite at. So, without further ado, let us marry astrology to film superheroes in a 100% scientifically accurate* examination of what your favourite crime-fighter says about you. (*may not be 100% scientifically accurate)
THE SILVER SURFER GEMINI
Whilst few have ever been as much in need of an anger-management class as Wolverine, he is nothing if not impulsive and courageous, both of which are classic characteristics of the Aries. Other signs that you may share common traits with this member of the X-Men are your sense of adventure and outgoing behaviour.
Suffering the misfortune of watching his parents cruelly murdered by a mugger at a young age, Bruce Wayne, aka Batman, has never had much time for criminals. Luckily for Bruce in his quest to dress up and fight the ne’er-do-wells, he shows all the great signs of a Taurus.
Always wishing to explore new worlds and galaxies, but never lingering too long in one place before moving swiftly onwards, The Silver Surfer was clearly a Gemini. In ancient Greek mythology, Gemini’s ruler was Mercury, the speedy messenger of the Gods, and you can’t get around much quicker than this guy on his light-speed surfboard.
But you may also display the odd selfish streak here and there. And it’s unlikely, but your normal skeleton may have been infused with adamantium to provide you with large retractable claws and a general sense of bulletproof-ness.
Subtle strength and a cool exterior, along with great patience have allowed him to bide his time, working his way up through the criminal network, cleaning up the mean streets of Gotham. Calm until pushed too far, Batman, like a Taurus, prefers to work solo, despite the misguided Joel Schumacher film sequels which provided him a Robin to hang out with.
If you are an intelligent and inquisitive sort who likes to travel, then this intergalactic demi-god might be your closest match. And if you have been forced to discover new worlds for your master to destroy, in order to preserve that of your own, then the similarity is striking!
Intense and brooding, Cancers can appear insensitive, when they are anything but. In fact, so concerned are they with what you are thinking, that they may well be trying to read your mind. And, if like Phoenix, one of their powers happens to be telepathy, then they probably are doing just that. And if you see inanimate objects moving about on their own, then telekinesis may be on the cards too. Cancers are born leaders and excellent diplomats, never easily beaten and even when you may think they have been bested, can rise from the flames and come back even stronger than before.
Enthusiasm for the task in hand sometimes has to make up for a lack of actual qualifications, e.g. wishing to fight crime in a green mask despite not having any super-powers, or being much use in a brawl. Happily though, Leos are usually born lucky, and will able to navigate life’s pitfalls without having to worry too much. Their warmth and generosity attract a large number of friends and allies too. Like a small girl with a purple wig, who swears like a sailor.
Always living by the mantra of doing the right thing, Virgos often provide a guiding beacon or moral compass which we can all benefit from. They enjoy serving others in some capacity, be it as a teacher, a doctor or an indestructible super-being from the planet Krypton. They react quickly to problems that arise in daily life, and not necessarily just those that are made alluded to with a cry of “Help me Superman!” Highly observant, analytical and practical people Virgos are useful to have around when a shelf needs fixing or Lex Luthor is hatching another dastardly plan for world domination.
CAPTAIN AMERICA LIBRA
A set of scales is the commonly known sign of the Libra, an indication of a person in search of balance. Or, on a quest for justice, if you happen to be Captain America. Probably the most overtly patriotic of the comic-book superheroes, Captain America righted wrongs on behalf of his country, seeking the truth and battering those who would wish to do harm America or it’s allies. If you are a person that often finds yourself fighting causes on behalf of others, then Captain America is your man.
MR FANTASTIC AQUARIUS
Life’s thinkers, creators and inventors are born under the sign of Aquarius, therefore their superhero counterpart would almost certainly be leader of the Fantastic Four, Mr Fantastic. Driven to always question that which they do not understand and never leave any stone unturned in a pursuit to solve a mystery, the Aquarius can be incredibly knowledgeable and insightful. However, they can also come across as overly-serious and find it hard to flick the ‘off-switch’ of their ever-inquisitive minds and enjoy life a little more.
Wise beyond their years, although sometimes believing they have all the answers can land them in trouble, or even see them banished to the planet Earth and stripped of their Godly powers. For us mortals who didn’t possess Godly powers to begin with, this is less of a worry, although the same still applies when it comes to landing yourself in it through brash over-confidence. Yet sometimes in life it pays to plough on in such an unyielding manner, which is why Scorpio is often considered to be the most powerful sign of the Zodiac. Very little that a Scorpio does is done without a real sense of purpose, and whether or not they have been cast out of the heavens by Odin, their self-willed determination will very often see them succeed.
SAGITTARIUS The eternal optimist and a definite love of the good life are both good ways to sum up the billionaire Tony Stark, aka Iron 63 Man. A sense of adventure and exuberant charm are also common ground shared by a Sagittarius with Iron Man. Never one to sit on their laurels, the Sagittarius loves to experiment. Not always in the sense of building a near indestructible metal suit that can fly, but on a smaller, more achievable scale.
SPIDERMAN PISCES THE HULK
Perseverance and determination are two stand-out characteristics of your average Capricorn, qualities which The Hulk has in abundance. You just try and stop him. One shout of “HULK SMASH!” and you’ll be wishing you’d let him get on with it. A Capricorn’s perseverance can sometimes be mistaken for stubborn behaviour but The Hulk always has good intentions, even if a few breakages happen along the way.
“Spiderman, Spiderman, does whatever a spider can”. Much the same can be said of the Pisces, who make the most of their talent and imagination to do what others may not have thought possible. A run-in with high levels of radioactivity which left them with the ability to shoot webs and scale buildings might have helped but Peter Parker was a straight A’s student before that anyway. Now he is able to combine his natural intelligence with superhuman strength and speed, to prove that the Piscean, while represented by an image of two fish, actually have a great deal in common with the world’s best known spider.
Every Summer Hollywood plumbs millions of dollars through their marketing machines to entice you out of the sunshine and into the cinema in order to see their biggest films of the year. Teaser trailers tease, billboards emblazoned with heroes loom overhead, character posters wait at bus stops with you, their precious audience, to get you to buy what they’re selling. They are everywhere. Blink and you’ll still see them. The random whirligig of social media and viral marketing now factors heavily into marketing strategies and I was caught up in a storm of expectation for one summer film in particular, buoyed by a tremendous trailer and the promise of the talent involved. Super 8, the 70s set Spielberg inspired sci-fi from director JJ Abrams is that rare beast: the original summer blockbuster and thanks to a typically cryptic marketing campaign it appeared to be a return to the soulful heights of E.T. and the like - perfect for nostalgia nerds and army of Abramites. Sadly it was not to be. Super 8 is the Instagram of the modern summer blockbuster. Just as the popular iPhone app allows happy snappers the chance to give their photos a nostalgic veneer Abrams’ film has the broken families, the mysterious military presence and a group of kids spending the last days of their childhood making films, stumbling into first loves and chasing Monsters. You can practically smell the Spielberg in the air - how can it fail? Spielberg’s producing credit on Transformers was justified when he suggested that director Michael Bay treat the first Transformers films as being about ‘a boy and his first car’ - advice Bay discarded to his cost for the sequel, which was simplified to ‘Confusion, Booms and Robo-Testicles’. JJ Abrams has Frankensteined Super 8 into existence, sending thousands of volts through a body comprised of Americana, Nostalgia, Spielbergalia and his own flashes of lens-flare and brilliance into some kind of Cloverfield Encounters of the Third Kind. There was no simplification here at all. There was youthful vigour in Gareth Edwards’ Monsters and Duncan Jones’ Moon, Neill Blomkamp’s District 9, hell, in 2009 you would have been lucky to find a more enjoyable film than Abrams’ own Star Trek reboot. These are films full of energy and ideas; stories told with brio, confidence, wit and life. They get the blood pumping, engage your mind and your heart. Super 8 has all the appearance of a great summer blockbuster, but is smothered by its influences and conceit. For all the nostalgic bombast the emotional centre of the film is hollow and confused. In the race to blend the coming of age and rampaging monster elements of the film an emotional cohesion is lost and it is, appropriately, a narrative train wreck.
The film is due out in August and I know that a lot of people will see it and love it. I was in a vast minority with my opinions. Technically it looks every bit the summer blockbuster it purports to be, but the heart isn’t there and with everything in the world - heart is everything. But there’s hope on the long summer horizon and it comes in the unexpected form of damned, dirty apes. One of the names thrown into the crowded arena of prequels, sequels and reboots this year may not immediately suggest itself as a must-see movie but Rise of the Planet of the Apes has rocketed to the top of my list after I had the chance to see some of the unfinished film out in L.A. All I knew was that a present day prequel to Planet of the Apes was being made with James Franco was in the lead. CG creatures were to be used and Andy Serkis and WETA were on board and when the first image of Serkis’ simian character, Caesar, was released it proved that technology and skill had reached a level where it was to make this creature come to life. We were shown an extended sizzle reel, mostly from the early part of the film and touched on the relationship between Franco’s ailing father (played by John Lithgow) and the young Caesar. We see the ape protecting and comforting the old man after a kerbside altercation, he sits with the family to eat, he learns to write and there’s a joy in his eyes as he does. Fox’s plan is diabolical - they will make you care for this ape (or ‘humanzee’ as he was called) then make us watch helplessly as he is betrayed, cast aside and ultimately show him turn against his human family, then the rest of us. They will warm our hearts before ripping them out. The point is this: there was more emotional engagement in the five minutes I saw of RISE than in the entire running time of Super 8 and this is what we want from our movies. Don’t drown us in CG or throw explosions like excitable children but use that money and talent to tell us stories and amaze us with truths we already know. The grand irony is while the cinematic skies are lit up with 3D robot explosions and comic book fisticuffs it is not the backto-basics nostalgia fest of Super 8 that will send audiences into a frenzy - it might well be the most impressive computer generated character we’ve ever seen. Forget Transformers, forget your costumed heroes, forget the past. All hail Caesar.
Blu-rays of Sunshine. Never Let Me Go - Ignore the appalling cover art and have your heart ripped out by Andrew Garfield and Carey Mulligan. Looks beautiful because it is.
Don’t Look Now - Nic Roeg’s 1973 horror looks incredible on Blu, retains its power to terrify the arse off of you. A sublime, nerve strangling chiller. May also contain Real Sex.
words : Jon Lyus - heyuguys.co.uk layout : Jack Walker
DVD Releases This Month
The Adjustment Bureau
(11th July) Matt Damon stars in this thriller based on a short story by Philip K. Dick
Rango (25th July) Animated Western about a chameleon who becomes the new Sheriff in town.
Patagonia (11th July)
Welsh drama about a couple who take a trip to the Welsh colony in South America called Patagonia.
The Lincoln Lawyer
My Dog Tulip
(11th July) Sweet, hand-drawn animation about the relationship formed between an old man and his dog.
words : Mark Williams
(11th July) Supposed to be good, but Matthew McConaughey is in it, and he is never in anything good any more, so approach with caution.
words : Joe West | illustration : Lou Taylor
BEA UT IFUL PEO PLE Bright eyes, artificially taught skin and regimented white teeth set in blushing gums; these are the features that define Hollywood in 2011. The gradual sanitisation of tastes and the targeting of 16-24 year old males by studio executives has resulted in heroes becoming bland in their physical perfection while heroines look like knock-off Bratz dolls, infantilised to the point of perversion, their unblemished complexions enhanced prematurely with botox while their figures are puckered into nothingness by crash diets. From anonymous hunks like Sam Worthington and Channing Tatum to the modified women displayed alongside and equated to the modified cars in the Fast & Furious franchise, mainstream movies from across the pond have the potential to homogenise your outlook on aesthetics and ultimately sap the personality from stars. This state of affairs is faintly depressing for most viewers, since no oneâ€™s perception of beauty is identical and it is arguable that storytelling is suffering as a result.
When the plot at hand is pure escapism then perhaps Hollywood’s vacuous beauty will suffice. But for anything deeper and more relatable it is necessary to show an appreciation of beauty’s rainbow, otherwise you face ostracising the audience and treating a film like a product and not a means of expression. Thankfully the British film industry allows for films like Submarine to be made outside of the commercial pressures and general laziness which throttle Hollywood’s ability to expand the horizons of beauty. This coming of age comedy from director Richard Ayoade has been lauded by critics and, perhaps prematurely, heralded as a feature which will shape British film. Whatever its ultimate impact, it is one of many films which celebrate the importance of imperfection in acting as a facet of someone’s physical beauty while simultaneously using looks to subtly shape the story. As they always say, show, don’t tell. At the centre of Submarine’s world is Oliver Tate, and his narration puts him firmly under the scrutiny of the audience. His actions show him to be reticent and lonely, his intellect stifled by his gawky school friends and his pubescent emotions bubbling into occasionally cruel acts of rebellion which manage to distance him from earning our total sympathy. This is juxtaposed with his internal monologue, which shows that he sees himself as an aloof, intellectual playboy, obsessed with the idea of having his life documented by a film crew and always looking for ways to play the part of the tragic, romantic hero as he quests for the attention of classmate Jordana. If Oliver were not played by the tousle-haired Craig Roberts, with his pale nervousness and awkward stance, then it would be much harder for the film to differentiate between his internal perception and his external appearance. Taken alongside something like Twilight, or indeed any US teen drama, where generically beautiful people attempt to play moping outsiders and the definition of plain or ugly is simply wearing glasses, it should be clear which casting choice is more rewarding for a necessarily diverse audience. Jordana, the object of Oliver’s affections, has been just as carefully constructed. From his point of view she is perfect, save the eczema which flares from time to time on her hands and behind her ears. Although Oliver singles out this condition as an imperfection, it becomes something of a fixation for the camera, with one or two flashing glances and strobing montages drawing focus to the small patches of dry skin which define Jordana, adding a vulnerability to her exterior frostiness and implying that the attraction which Oliver feels for her is not conditional on perceived flaws but based on the entire girl. She embodies the underdeveloped sexuality of teenage girls, sure of her powers over the opposite sex but ultimately at a loss as to what purpose
they might serve her until lessons of experience are learned. Once more compare this to Hollywood, where teens are either frigid virgins or damaged sluts, fooled into mistaking sexual submission for empowerment. There is no such dichotomy in Submarine, which deals with the loss of virginity as a funny, tender and, most importantly, individual experience. One notable exception to Hollywood’s treatment of the subject is Easy A starring Superbad’s Emma Stone, a lone progressive sugar grain on the bitter grapefruit of teenage sexuality as seen through Tinsel Town’s warped lens. Oliver’s parents are equally well defined by their outward appearances, again drawing on the basic premise that imperfections or oppositions help to flesh out a story, a process which pleasingly involves actual flesh, in this case. Sally Hawkins plays Oliver’s mother Jill. Hawkins is in reality a striking woman, but the buttoned-down nature of her character requires that this is partially disguised by a dour haircut and a wardrobe of beige cardigans. Sometimes her inner vivacity is allowed to show through and it becomes apparent that her current appearance has been shaped by her marriage, with the dreams of youth compacted under the mundane force of middle class matrimony. Might Hollywood have cast a cougar-esque actress with a proven track record of pool boy bedding as this decidedly desperate housewife? The answer is yes, and it wouldn’t have worked. Submarine’s attention to detail when it comes to physical appearance and overall cinematic style are no accident. Ayoade himself is something of a misfit, his afro forced into a side parting and his penchant for geek chic getups looking less forced as soon as you hear his voice and appreciate that the reserved yet eloquent strains belie his education and unassuming intelligence. Submarine is probably the best recent example of how beauty is not only subjective but that the examination of it can also reveal deeper meanings in the narrative and that this is an act most viewers will perform and catalogue subconsciously. Perhaps the main reason to take issue with Hollywood’s stance on beauty as opposed to the more considered, independent view given by relative small fries like Submarine, is that many audiences have been subconsciously conditioned to associate positive traits with good looks and malicious intent with uneven features and imperfect smiles. This limits the vocabulary of film narrative to its most basic, with the handsome Disney prince sure to overthrow the ugly old crone who is against him. As this example indicates, it is the kind of device used in children’s stories and one which is continually appropriated for adult content with little or no alteration, stunting the growth of potentially mature works. It is probably unfair to say that Hollywood never features alternative forms of beauty on its coveted silver screen, but it is sadly accurate. What it does do from time to time is take a
celebrated star and hide their looks behind makeup and prosthetics, at which point they usually win an Oscar because they are suddenly humanised, humbled and able to get on with some actual acting without their physical appearance posing as a distraction. The most obvious example is Charlize Theron playing serial killer Aileen Wuornos in Monster, but it happens more regularly than you might think. Recently released Bradley Cooper vehicle Limitless features him as a bedraggled, pale-skinned writer who takes an experimental drug which unlocks his mental capacity to help him game the stock market, amongst other things. The fact that this is visually represented by his skin attaining an instantaneous tan and his subsequent desire for metrosexual preening gently consolidates the message which Hollywood has been pushing for years; there is a way you need to look and if you manage to succeed in this area then you will be a better person. Of course on the other hand if you do not fit the mould then you are probably a serial killer, which goes double for unconventional looking women, who are largely expelled from the industry altogether. The thrust of the argument so far has positioned Hollywood and the British film industry as diametrically opposed to one another when it comes to beauty, so it might bear a few more examples to sit alongside Submarine and bolster the cause of eliminating the pervasive superficiality, which has become part and parcel of the modern cinema experience. It is easiest to point to the catalogue of films from director and professional midlander Shane Meadows, as almost every one of his features, from This is England to Le Donk and Scorseze, deals with physical appearances and beauty in a refreshing way. In the former a runtish boy is welcomed into the brash, image-centric skinhead culture, finding love in the arms of an incredibly unconventional older girl nicknamed Smell. The latter tells the story of a plump, pale rapper who continually surprises audiences with his proficiency on the mic, the discrepancy between his looks and his abilities juxtaposed with compelling efficiency. In Hollywood we know precisely what to expect when a character walks on screen based on their appearance. That is not to say that the same preconceptions are not at work when we watch British films, but the point is that we are far likelier to have our expectations confounded by words and actions which do not adhere to a specific type when we sit down to watch something home grown. You could argue that on the topic of beauty, Hollywood is something of a lost cause, and that attempting to reason with it is like trying to convince a well-made brick wall to turn itself into some crazy paving just to appease the minority. But the problem is that the audience for a blockbuster and for indie films like Submarine is one and the same, with its own individual tastes in beauty and every other aspect of life. People just need reminding of this fact.
RORY CULKIN Some people spend their whole lives agonising over what career path to choose without ever really working out what their true calling is but for 22-year-old Rory Culkin the answer must have been a pretty obvious one. Growing up as the son of an actor father and as younger brother to established actors Kieran and Machaulay it would seem that Rory’s path was already set out for him. As a child Rory would find himself getting cast as the younger version of his brother’s on-screen characters in various films (as a younger Machaulay in Richie Rich and a younger Kieran in Igby Goes Down) and it wasn’t long before he decided to step out of his brothers shadows and go it alone. Having previously appeared in Signs, Lymelife and a handful of other film and TV roles the actor has recently stepped up to the challenge of arguably his biggest, most commercial, role to date in Scream 4. We caught up with Rory shortly after the films release to find out about the role, what it’s like to come from such a famous family and why he doesn’t feel any competiveness with his brothers…
potographer : Eric Luc | photo assistant So Yoshimura | styling by Nicholas Whitehouse | styling assistants : Tate Delloye and Dennine Dyer | hair by Kristen Serafino for Jonathan Products | Make up by Regina Harris
What is the first film you remember seeing? 2001: A Space Odyssey Have you seen any films recently that have really blown you away? The Fallî by Tarsem Singh was amazing. I’m also excited for Immortals. But if we’re being real Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs blew my mind. I mean, food falling from the sky? Think about it. Was acting a natural job for you to take up, seeing as it is more or less the family trade? I’d say so. Everything just sort of fell into place. I’d never thought about how many acting families there are, but now I do there’s quite a lot; the Baldwins, the Fondas, the Sheens and so on. Coming from a family of actors yourself, which other acting families do you admire? I’ve always been a fan of the Pheonix brothers. Ben and John Foster are also really talented. And, if you were to all get together for some kind of surreal, acting families only picnic, who would win the family baseball tournament and what food item would you bring to the picnic? I don’t know what I would bring. Maybe pie. Yeah pie. Pies are cool. As for the baseball… I can’t really say. Imagine for a moment you are fifty years old and looking back on your acting career. What do you hope your fifty year old self will be looking back on? Lots of art-house critical acclaim or blockbuster-tastic mega-success? Or perhaps a happy medium? I guess a happy medium. I don’t see it as two different things. Not all art house movies are critically acclaimed and not all big budget movies are successful. It’s all about the role for me. I have a younger brother and we can be quite competitive sometimes, and if wikipedia is accurate you have four brothers, so how does that work out on a competitiveness level? Honestly, we’re not very competitive. That comes as a surprise to most people for some reason. Which, in your opinion, is the best film featuring a Culkin? (Extra points for being totally un-diplomatic in your answer). Party Monster is up there but I think The Dangerous Lives of Alter Boys is on top. No extra points for me Was it a strange experience to play younger versions of two of your brothers on screen? Nah I was like four I didn’t really know what was going on. Of the films you’ve been in so far, which has been the most fun to work on, and why? Scream 4 or I’m Sorry but Scream 4 was probably the most fun. I had never seen so much blood.
And which film that you’ve acted in is your personal favourite? Lymelife is, and always will be, my favorite. Is it exciting to be part of such a well known, iconic film franchise as Scream? Of course. Just watching those movies is exciting. What was it like to work with a director like Wes Craven? There can’t be much that he doesn’t know about making a horror movie... Wes is great. He gives you a lot of space. If he sees something he likes, he doesn’t say a word. I guess you’re not allowed to give details of how your character Charlie Watson fares in Scream 4 cuurently, but can you tell us a little about him and how he fits into the plot of the film? Charlie Walker is head of the cinema club and when the killings start to happen he sees it as a chance to show off his knowledge of the genre. It’s finally his turn to talk. As with the previous Scream films, Scream 4 features a large cast of well-known actors. Was there anyone in particular that you were looking forward to working with when you first saw the cast list? I’ve always loved Marley Shelton so I was very excited to be working with her. She makes me nervous. You’re rocking the long hair at the moment. Without sounding old, (as I’m only 26), I used to have hair that length at university and do miss it sometimes! Have you got any roles coming up in which you may be asked to cut it short, and would you do so? Of course I would. I’m not in love with my hair or anything. I just forget to cut it.
WJ: Can you tell us a little bit about how you got in to directing? BN: It might be a bit of a cliché but I love films. I have a huge passion for film as an art form and knew from the age dot that I wanted to be involved with the industry. >>What jobs did you do when you were starting out? Lots really, started as a runner in TV, making tea, cleaning toilets (true) and generally trying to make an impression and get noticed. I worked for MTV, BBC and then got signed to Pulse Films after making a short film called ‘War School’. >>What was the first job you ever took on as a director? It was a music video for my good friend Elliot Gleave (Example). We used to work together at Fox Kids in their tape library. When we shot the video he was just an aspiring rapper and I wanted to make videos so we thought it was the perfect combination. >>You direct music videos and TV adverts, do you work on any other type of projects and which medium do you prefer? I work on all sorts of projects, music documentaries, music shows for TV and at the moment I am working on developing a feature film.
Earlier this year Who’s Jack were lucky enough to join the people over at Lucozade on a trip to the ever sunny L.A. The point behind the trip was to get a behind the scenes look at their latest YES advertising campaign which sees the brand creating not one but three music led films (you may have already seen the one starring Tinie Tempah and Travis Barker). While over there I caught up with Ben Newman, the director of the advert for Lucozade Sports Lite to find out more about the campaign, how he got in to directing and why, with the award for Best New Director and videos for Examples under his belt, he is quickly turning in to a director to watch… <<<<
>>How did the shoot for the Lucozade advert go? Amazing and extremely hard work. This was my first commercial, Nils Leonard from Grey (Lucozade’s advertising agency) put a lot of faith in me and hopefully I’ve done it justice... You guys will have to be the judge of that though! >>What was the concept for the advert? Generating a feeling... a ‘YES’ moment. We set out to make a film that captured a feeling amongst friends who turn out to be extremely talented on a pair of Roller Skates. >>Was there quite a tight brief before shooting began or did you get to use your own creative initiative? I think the Grey Advertising Team wanted directors to do what they’re known for so I feel like I was given a lot of trust to make creative decisions all the way throughout shooting. >>How does shooting in Los Angeles compare to shooting in London? Where do you prefer? Sun is the main difference. Lots of sun! L.A is an amazing place for anyone who loves film because it’s got a very unreal vibe going on. For me though, each project is different, I love London for the culture and diversity but LA is a great place because of the weather. Does that answer the question? >>It does. What was your highlight of the shoot? All of it... >>You won Best New Director at the video awards and lots of people are tipping you as ‘one to watch’ – how does that feel and does it put pressure on you to keep making things that live up to what people expect? The award was an amazing accolade but I can’t get caught up with all that stuff. I guess I’ve just got to stay focused and believe that the decisions I’m making are the right ones. In the words of Winston Churchill… ‘History will be kind to me for I intend to write it’. >>You’ve worked with the likes of DJ Fresh, Wretch 32 and Example – is there anyone else you haven’t worked with yet that you’d like to? Lots. Adele, Radiohead, Kanye West, Kermit the frog, Chase and Status... maybe Madonna. >>Do you have any advice for any aspiring directors reading this? Don’t be afraid to do what you think is right. Make sure that you concentrate on themes, ideas, styles that you enjoy and don’t be a sheep and follow a popular fad. The best advise I can give is to make sure you work harder than everyone else. >>Where is your favourite place to shoot in the world? New York City and at home in London. >>Where is your least favourite place to shoot? Macdonalds. I haven’t shot there yet but I can imagine the smell being quite distracting. >>What is your mantra? Arrrrrhhhhhhoooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm! (and repeat).
PICK OF THE MONTH
THE GOOD NEWS
We Smell What The Rock Is Cooking Despite the fact that it’s G.I Joe 2, we at Jack are still excited for it due to one man - Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson. The former wrestler has signed on to play Roadblock; a one-ton all American ass kicking machine and that is in no way depressing.
Soho Shorts Festival
“The Biggest Monster Movie Ever Made” Quite a statement from Guillermo Del Toro about his Pacific Rim project, but if anyone can deliver it is most definitely dear Guilly. Just to add fuel to that exciting fire, it’s about humans using giant robots to fight off alien invasion. Amazing.
Celebrating its 13th year the Soho Shorts festival returns with a program stacked with highlights. The festival takes place between the 20th-29th July and is the UK’s best short film festival showing both emerging and established talent. This year the festival opens with feature documentary, POM Wonderful Presents : The Greatest Movie Ever Sold, directed by Morgan Spurlock. The documentary explores the potential for product placement in financing films, something that is getting more and more interest from brands and short filmmakers alike. There are also deluxe seminars at the Hospital Club, the Soho Short Filmmakers Market in collaboration with BAFTA presenting discussions, debates and all day screenings as well as the films in the main competition. For full lists of venues, events and screenings get to the website. www.rushes.co.uk
Down Tolkien Erection, Down... As if we weren’t already brimming at the sides with glorious anticipation for Jackson’s ‘Hobbit’ two parter, the bastard then goes and releases pics of Martin Freeman as Bilbo...this lump in our pants shall not pass until 2012.
Summer Outdoor Screenings This summer there are three outdoor destinations for you to see films in the open air put on by Great British Summer 11.com. Screenings are taking place in Cardinal Place Victoria, BankSide Mix Southbank and New Street Sqaure Holborn. Throughout the beginning of July you can also see Wimbledon on big screens at Bankside and at New Street Square you can see films such as Grease, The Social Network and Notting Hill all this month. There are also titles that you can vote on to be shown towards the end of July. Screenings continue until the 7th July and the best thing of all, they are free. www.greatbritishsummer11.com
The London Indian Film Festival 30th June – 12th July 2011 After its debut last year the Indian Film Festival returns with a diverse programme. India releases roughly 1,000 films a year which is nearly twice as many as Hollywood however not many of these make it across the pond into the UK. The festival aims to dispel myths that all the film output of India falls into the Bollywood category. This year opens with the world premiere of comedy, Delhi Belly and also screens the family friendly, The White Elephant, terrorism drama, The Way Home and transsexual romance, Just Another Love Story. A real intersection through Indian film. Screenings are everywhere from the BFI to Wood Green Cineworld. www.londonindianfilmfestival.co.uk
JOBS Rainstar Boutique We’re looking for someone with a clean, yet variable style, not too playful but definitely creative. Please send us an email to email@example.com Editor Rainstar Boutique We’re working on lots of different projects and are looking for someone who’s passionate, committed, reliable and works with Final Cut Pro and After Effects. firstname.lastname@example.org
Tarantino After Some Big Willy Style Quite frankly, we’d watch a painting dry if Tarantino released it as his next feature so the news that he’s after Will Smith to star in his Spaghetti Western ‘Django Unchained’ just makes everything all the fucking sweeter.
THE BAD NEWS
Toy Story 4 Is A-Coming
Naturally most may be excited at the prospect of a 4th installment in the simply brilliant trilogy after Tom Hanks let slip that Pixar are working on the idea now...but we’re a little more judgemental. Toy Story 3 was so perfect where the hell could they possibly take the story from there?!
David Tennant Looks A Little BBC 1
As much as we love the idea of a Brit doing well across the pond in Lala Land, pictures of David Tennant in the new Fright Night remake couldn’t help but make us cringe a little. He looks more like a baddy in ‘Merlin’, than a shotgun waving vampire slayer. Sorry Dave.
Hayley Joel Osmund’s Face
The little’un who starred in The Sixth Sense is back and ready to act again...but have you seen his grown up face?! It’s like someone pinned him down and held his childs face in place for 10 years whilst the rest of his head continued to grow outwards.
This Month : McBess >>What inspires you? I’m getting most of my inspiration from my everyday life; things like food, music, friends... Also from childhood memories or fantasies, I try to keep it as personal as I can so I don’t have to rely on ephemeral trends. I tend to have long walks in the woods while listening to Belle and Sebastian, I can spend hours looking at the squirrels dancing from tree to tree, immerse myself in the grass in a meadow; it’s a way for me to get in touch with my feelings and stay true to my roots. >>Do you have any notable fans? I’ve got some nice feedback from heroes of mine, artists and illustrators that inspired me to start drawing, people like Dave Cooper and Kid Acne. I’ve also been asked to do the artwork for a few famous bands. I usually say no but I did one for Beataucue who are a French band signed to Kitsune. >>Tell us a fact that no one knows about you... I’m a vegetarian, no one knows it and I’m doing my best to hide it. I’ve never had a piece of animal in my mouth. I actually went to jail for a day for trying to get a cow out of a slaughterhouse, I firmly believe that we should treat animals like human beings and only eat fish. >>A quote/mantra you live or work by? ‘An apple a day makes you really fat, but it’s OK!’ Website: www.mcbess.com Coming up : 4th August, McBess solo show, The Folding Knife comes to The Book Club. www.wearetbc.com
ER T T O P ART S Davidson r Eleano
Copyright : Museum of London
London Street Photography Walking around London the other day I played ‘spot the camera’ and in the space of twenty minutes counted a whopping 27! And no, I was not at a Techno-Geek convention, this was just your average Tom, Dick and Harry. With the comeback of photography (not that it actually disappeared), but in digital form the advancements in technology have been questioned in regard to the impact this has had on taking pictures. Changing technology has done two things, altering the way pictures are taken with the digitalisation of cameras, and altering the subjects themselves, especially visible when looking at London as the subject. The technological progression has been charted in the Museum of London’s current exhibition London Street Photography, exploring the changes in street photography from 1860 to present, largely down to progression of cameras, especially in the dawn of digitalisation. The exhibition is organised in to three vague time periods, beginning with the 1880s when photographers were
restricted by long exposure times, meaning their subjects had to remain static, preventing any capture of movement. The images from this early period consequently depict posed groups of people, but in all of these photos you can practically feel the photographer buzzing in his boots, eager to capture the life in the city, even if it’s just a boy in the corner picking his nose. The second section looks at the period from 1930-79 when technology had advanced to the point where photographers were able to catch life in motion, resulting in a huge collection of cheeky chappies captured rampaging around the East End. Think beautiful imagery mixed with a fascination for seeing London as it once was, minus traffic lights, bollards and McDonalds, all drenched in a sepia tone and smoggy, atmospheric lighting. The last section from 1980 to present shows the huge change in the nature of photography with the introduction of digital cameras, allowing for an
immediacy and flexibility that had not previously been possible. Cue the humour shots, with happy accidents producing images that will cause a smirk and a half in this unnervingly quiet, basement show space. The freedom to get snap happy and trash-tastic has completely changed the process of taking pictures, as the selection process in creating an image is much less precious. In the sphere of street photography, the Museum of London’s exhibition illustrates this alteration most vividly, as you will see when you visit it. Which you will. When applied to London as a general subject, the impact of advancing technology seems to be even more significant. This was highlighted for me when viewing the winners of the National Gallery’s Modern perspectives competition, where photographers were invited to submit their own interpretation of a cityscape. One of the winners, Tom Sullam, had submitted a shot taken from the roof of One Hyde Park, currently in its stages of construction, looking as he described, like a Star Wars set. The
Copyright Henry Grant Collection
Copyright Tom Sullam
industrialised, mechanical representation of London seemed so powerful, a million miles away from the lively figures displayed in the Museum of London, but teeming with life none the less. The buzzing traffic beneath and the buildings rapidly growing above present London as an organism shaping the character of the city. This suggests London is not only represented by the people within it, but also by the development of its landscape, progressing at a faster rate every day. With growth of technology and development, has London gained a life of its own, detached from the people within it? When I posed this question to Tom, he suggested that people have grown more passive with the advances in technology and are less connected to a sense of place, ie, theyâ€™re too busy looking at their iphones welded to their palm, engrossed in TED, Twitter and Ebay, frantically bidding on a retro cake mixing machine.
In terms of photography, a digital camera is also passive to some extent, doing all the work for you whereas shooting on film requires an element of controlling the mechanical process of taking a picture. The sense of creation is enhanced.
it can clearly be seen through work such as Tomâ€™s and when you walk down the street.
As photographers of the past struggled to capture the life within London through the people living within it, today the life can equally be captured by looking at the continually transforming urban landscape which would now appear to have a life of its own. Much as this may sound like the plot for an embarrassingly bad 1950s horror film, (a bit like The Blob)
Aspirations are high, with plans to occupy a permanent space some time in the near future, making this the perfect time to support such an exciting amalgamation of ideas in its early stages.
Photography is the best means for charting this progress, so grab your camera and join the masses!
Events listings: London Street Photography Exhibition, running until 4th September Cost : Free Museum of London London Wall London EC2Y 5HN www.museumoflondon.org.uk
PICK OF THE MONTH
Gone With The Wind - Till 17th July
BP Portrait Award On Until 18th September The image above may look like something out of a book celebrating the Old Masters but it is actually by an artist yet to be established. That is what the BP Portrait Awards are all about. Entries for this award are entirely non-exclusive therefore anyone can enter and in turn, anyone can win. This year alone the Awards got over 2,732 entries that have now been cut down to a chosen 55 to be displayed for your viewing pleasure at the National Portrait Gallery.
This is a group show that includes Max Eastley, Takehisa Kosugi, Walter Marchetti and Resonance104.4fm who will be at the location of the exhibition for the duration of the show. The show is an ongoing mash up of both old and new works as well as live performance and a selection of archived material. Works by each of the artists are the outcome of being given the problem of immateriality and creating a representation in response to ‘lightness of touch, approaching with sound and patience, restraint and fidelity’. Raven Row www.ravenrow.org FREE
KEEP YOUR BEADY EYE ON..
Enter E Stings
Nicholas Pomeroy Nicholas documents his friends on his manual film camera and does it to great effect. Rare are the times that looking at other people’s friends warrants interest but if all your friends took the kind of pictures that Pomeroy takes you could be captivated. Full of nostalgia, fun times and youth the images would be hard pushed not to draw you in, if not make you want to go buy yourself or dig out your old film camera. They also make you wishing you had attractive/good at posing friends because that always helps. Here is a selection of our favourite. www.flickr.com/photos/pomtopolis_shoots
JOBS Interior Photography Stylist Rick Schultz Photography Work is freelance for when photo shoots are booked. Pay would be 50% of charge for shoot and/or 50% of published work once paid by publishing agent. email@example.com. Gallery Assistant Internship Imitate Modern The job is from July to August, and then with the possibility of extending it longer depending on how things have worked out. firstname.lastname@example.org
You’ve seen them no doubt, those clever little stings that are on E4 all so often? Well the reason why some of them look a bit home made if you don’t already know is that they are all winners from a competition that is held to find new ones each year and there is still time to enter this years one. If you make a sting for E4, upload it and it gets picked then you could be looking at £2,500 in your pocket as well as it getting your work aired on E4. Exciting much? Just a bit considering this competition has launched careers in the past. All you need do to make your E Sting is to take the E4 logo and what ever you like from the selection of sounds offered online and create an original brand sting using them. If you don’t win there is also a runner up prize of £500 so all is not lost. Deadline is....... today! (1.07.11). www. e4.com/estings
Life & London.
Luke Stephens, our favourite make up artist, keeps us in the know when it comes to beauty
The bag for the festival-goer that wants it all and has the money to buy it. This bag is full of the best money can buy in small, portable sizes. It will set you back a bit but will be easily transferable into your main make up bag once back from the field. Luminous Skin Colour, BECCA, £35.
This fantastic combo of tinted moisturiser, and sheer foundation infused with antioxidant vitamins, and antiseptic ingredients is a favourite of mine. Gently evens out skin tone, whilst moisturising the skin at the same time. It also has a broad spectrum SPF of 25, so no need for an additional sunscreen.
The Multiple in Laguna, NARS, £29.
The cult NARS bronzing colour in Laguna comes for a limited time only in a multiple. This magic stick can be used as a bronzer, as an eye shadow, and on the lips! It has a very subtle and soft highlighting effect on the skin also. Utterly mistake proof, and so easy to apply.
Fudge On The Go Pack, £20.99. Includes all things essential for keeping hair happy on the festival run. This pack contains the amazing Fudge dry shampoo acting as a dry clean for in between washes, the Dynamite Membrane Gas which doubles as a styling paste AND a hairspray, and to condition dry and frazzled hair, the Ends Miracle Smoothing treatment which has a UV filter in it to protect. Available at Amazon. Mascara Singulier Waterproof, Yves Saint Laurent, £22.
Curving, volumising, and lengthening mascara in a non drying, flaking, or caking formula. This luxurious mascara has rayon microfibers resembling silk to lengthen the lashes, and comes in five amazing colours, from black standard, right through to very vibrant blue. I love that this mascara is said to give you ‘exaggerated lashes’ . It really does.
Ellis Faas ‘System’, Ellis Faas, prices start at £21.
Innovative, stylish, and simply stunning collection of easy use make-up, with you the user at its heart. These space age like sleek, steel effect pens contain every conceivable piece of make-up you could ever wish for. Everything you need for your whole face, from eye liner to blush, gloss and mascara, and a selection of different textured eye shadows, fits inside the silver holder, which even has a handy mirror in the top. We likey. We likey a lot. Available online and at Liberty’s.
BaByliss 2581BU Pro Cordless Straightener, £19.38.
Why didn’t anyone think of these sooner? Very lightweight and handy, totally cordless hair straighteners. Now there’s no more searching for the caravan power point to steal the leccy off of. Available at Amazon.
This is your mid-range bag that will leave you a little extra money to get a bag to actually put it all in that’s nice rather than a plastic bag, however make sure that like a plastic bag your chosen option is waterproof as we all know what the weather likes to do at these festivals. All the basics in this little lot plus a few handy extras. Moisture Surge Tinted Moisturiser SPF 15, Clinique, £21.
Beautiful natural coverage, available in six shades and has an SPF of 15. A super moisturising lightweight gel-cream formula that means your skin won’t dry out, all day long. Contains aloe barbadenisis leaf water which works to deliver an intense boost of moisture immediately when applied to the skin.
Moisturising Hand Sanitiser, Jurlique, £5.
SPF 35 Targeted Protection Stick, Clinique, £15.50.
No festival bag is complete without this travel friendly solution for the more neglected and sensitive areas exposed to sunshine (we hope!). Contains vitamin E to help protect the skins, and Jojoba esters to condition, pop this stick on lips, ears and nose for a more focused protection against sunburn.
Precision Ink Liquid Eyeliner, Illamasqua, £17.
Amazing glide on, and super sparkly gold liquid liner in Alchemy. This gem dries super quick, and is even water proof so no wet off worries. Comes in three shades. Get funky and dab some of this on your mascara for some karat calibre lashes.
Eye make-up remover pads, Halo Wipes, £1.99.
A natural alternative to the more harsh chemical hand sanitisers. Contains Australian Bush mint, a natural antibacterial and antimicrobial, and safflower seed oil to moisturise and nourish. This non drying formula is designed to eliminate 99.9% of bacteria 30 second after application. It leaves the hands smelling minty fresh, and clean. Available at, SpaceNK, Selfridges, Wholefoods, and John Lewis.
SO messy panda eyes can be easily addressed with these perfect pocket sized pads infused with Eye make-up remover to gently take away residue. They even work on waterproof mascara. 10% of all profits from these pads will also go to Cancer Research UK. Available at Superdrug, Tesco and Independent Pharmacies.
Pocket Pal, Benefit, £15.50.
Creamy eye shadow in a range of amazing funky colours with a metallic shine. Easy to use on eyes lips face and body with your finger or a brush for more precise applications. Go hippy and paint some stars on your body with these. Amazing!
Benefit’s famous Benetint, and a gloss all in one very convenient stick. Use the Benetint end for lips and cheeks, and the clear gloss on the lips for portable glamour!
Beach Tint, BECCA, £20.
A water resistant, and oh so blendable crème stain for the cheeks and lips. Streak free and non greasy, perfect for keeping the colour whilst out and about. Comes in six shades. Available at BECCA, and Fenwicks, Bond Street.
Liquid Metal Cream Eye shadow, Illamasqua, £17.50.
Your bag of basics, this can all be chucked in a plastic bag if you desire as nothing will be harmed or is particularly lastingly precious but it will all do the job for which it is intended which is the important thing. All Over Cover Stick, Eyes, Lips, Face, £1.50.
An excellent tiny little stick of base for all over, or just the areas that need a little help. Infused with natural active ingredients, and skin polymers to soothe and protect your skin.
Storm Palette, Sleek MakeUp , £6.49. 12 shades of eye shadow for a perfect smoked out look or a sultry natural eye make-up, all in a handy palette with a mirror, and convenient applicators. Available at Superdrug. Deodorant Wipes, Halo, 99p.
Handy for the honking! These gems contain a non-sting lotion so can be used underarms without fear of irritation even on the most sensitive of skins. They provide long lasting deodorant protection, and have 10 in each pack. Available at ASDA, and Independent Pharmacies.
Pout Polish, Sleek MakeUp, £4.30.
A perfect pot of polish. Containing Avocado and sweet almond oil for moisturisation, these coloured creamy lip tints also has a high SPF of 15. Comes in 7 shades. Available at Superdrug.
Toilet and Surface Wipes, Halo, 99p. We’ve all been there. Someone isn’t as conscientious a flusher as we are, and what in the name of festas is THAT on the seat? These wipes are ideal for on toilets, or any other skin contact surfaces. They protect against e-coli, e-faecalis and other harmful bacteria, and they can be flushed away. Available at Tesco, ASDA, and Independent Pharmacies.
www.maccosmetics.co.uk, www.halowipes.co.uk, www.sleekmakeup.com, www.clinique.co.uk, www.beccacosmetics.co.uk, www.ellisfaas.com, www.benefitcosmetics. co.uk, www.eyeslipsface.co.uk, www.narscosmetics.co.uk, www.illamasqua.co.uk, www.jurlique.co.uk, www.amazon.co.uk, www.thebodyshop.co.uk
RETURN OF THE
1990’s words: Francesca Baker
Are you ready to party like it’s 1999? Or 1995 for that matter? How about 1992? Any will do, as it seems that the nineties are the decade da jour, if that’s not too much of an anachronism. Of course plundering the archives of the past for inspiration is hardly a novel idea but does the fact that a the vast majority of those partaking in the trend remember the decade that makes the nineties revival seem significant, or is it just another spell of looking back to ‘ye olden days’?
Whilst I hate to use the recession as an excuse for everything, and would rather not be accused of lazy thinking, it is well acknowledged by scientists and social commentators alike that we lean towards familiarity in times of discomfort. Change makes people uneasy and comfort is found in easy ways. You’re as likely to find bangers’n’mash or Spotted Dick on the menu of a fancy restaurant as you are on the tea tray of any Yorkshire family. People complain about the over reliance on technology and the intangible nature of much of our pastimes, such as listening to mp3s rather than a physical release, or spending hours on Facebook rather than down the pub. The craze for mix-tapes or album clubs is then something that allows people to react against something, make a stand, but in a manner that is easy and does not require too much of an adjustment of their ways of life. Of course this too is nothing new – the irony of the fact that in
1977 the Sex Pistols topped the music charts with ‘God Save The Queen’ and the book and merchandise charts were whipped by the revival of Edith Holden’s ‘The Country Diary of an Edwardian Lady’ can hardly be lost. Rather than the nineties coming back, it seems that people are going back to the nineties. Think about it, it is not people who have never known the nineties suddenly looking for inspiration from the decade and taking their own millennium twist on it (although my thirteen year old sister and her friends have been posting Supergrass lyrics as her Facebook status. Like.) The guys at the gigs are paunchy balding men taking Born Slippy’s ‘lager lager lager’ refrain verbatim. The front rows of Take That’s concerts are predominantly middle aged women who now feel that it’s not verging on the cradle snatching to fancy Mark Owen.
In the music, the memories, the history books, it is clear that the nineties were meant to be some kind of zeitgeist that changed Britain forever. With a Tory government, a rise in VAT and spikes in the unemployment rate eerily reminiscent of late 80s and early 90s Britain, is it any wonder that those who have the feeling that it all went a bit Pete Tong are seeking solace in the easier days, when all they had to be was mad for it and the rest fell into place? If today’s twenty somethings are facing a futile search for employment, the practical impossibility of ever owning their own house, and mounting student debts, it is perhaps understandable that they seek solace in the easier times of their youth. Unable to do any of the standard things that mark the threshold of having made it to adulthood, there is almost no choice but to remain in the teenage years – the 1990 years. Nickelodeon are bringing back the teen shows that made them famous, like Clarissa, Kenan & Kel and Sister Sister, but if the teens and tweens of 2011 don’t end up drooling over orange soda, it won’t be a failure. As Nickelodeon acknowledge, it is not today’s children that they are targeting. Keith Dawkins, senior VP and general manager of TeenNick, speaking to Entertainment Weekly said that ‘At the time, we were completely devoted to that audience ages 9, 10, and 11. It was ground-breaking and for the young viewers, a powerful and pivotal time in their lives. Those kids who are now 22, 23 and 24 want to bring that back.’ A look through the listings may lead you to believe that you have opened Time Out and slipped into the past. Pulp, Blur, and Suede have all reformed, and are taking to some big stages. What does it say about current music when Pulp and Blur are the preferred headliners of Isle of Wight and Glastonbury. It’s not even that bands are recording new material – Suede have remastered and reissued all five albums, and will be playing the entirety of 1993’s Suede, 1994’s Dog Man Star and 1996’s Coming Up this May at Brixton Academy, and if reports are to be believed Primal Scream’s Screamadelica
gigs in which they played the seminal 1991 album out were a rather raucous affair. Take That’s 25 date Progress Tour was the biggest in UK history. Blue, Spice Girls and all have singles out, and even Let Loose are back this year along with audience that they were never a boy band… Reading, a festival patronised by 16 year olds enjoying post exam and no parents freedom was last year headlined by Blink 182 and Guns’n’Roses, neither being hip young things. Much of the hype surrounding new bands seems to suggest that the 1990s were some kind of musical utopia to which we must lean again. Brother are the ‘new Oasis’ we are told. Why do we need a replica? Fashion has had plenty of nineties moments, with velvet, lace et all being donned on the catwalk and in our high street shops. Neon is the new black according to some commentators, and festival chic everywhere owes more than a passing nod to grunge, floral dresses and boots adorning female punters. There are also horrifying rumours that the bum bag is to replace the Alexa as the new ‘It’ accessory on every fashionista’s arm. Or hips. Turning towards a time that a lot of people can remember is also more wallet friendly in a lot of ways. To be part of the fashion set you don’t need to pay over the odds for vintage wear from a hipper than thou boutique, but rummage in the back of your wardrobe for the greying bodysuit, fraying jeans, or Adidas jacket, and hey presto, bang on trend. Either this, or the fact that entertainers are running out of ideas, may help to explain our media channels. The BBC has been slammed for their schedules of repeats, in 2009 screening a record level, equivalent to 530 full days of repeats and shows that we thought had disappeared seem to be being resurrected – Red Dwarf: Back to Earth, broadcast over the Easter weekend of 2009. More than one in five of films made in Hollywood this year will be sequels of 90s box office big sellers, and I have already seen posters and trailers for Titanic: Two The Surface and Scream 4. With smaller wallets, either in reality or made to believe so by the recession craze, companies are unwilling to take a punt and invest in new formulas that may
not be successful and pull in the pounds. Although it seemed to be a social movement, a sort of uprising in the world of confectionary, Cadbury’s also must have realised that surely it was a better monetary bet to bring back the Wispa, harnessing the viral and social media as support. The gap between the past and present is also being squeezed. It is now possible to study 1990s as a period of history, to do cultural studies of Cool Britannia. 2004 saw the first ‘I love the 90s’ television reminisce and Absolute Radio earlier this year launched Absolute Noughties – over for 3 months and yet we are still calling back for its familiarity. This may be because technology has enhanced the speed at which developments can be made, and indeed, some aspects of life in the final decade of the twentieth century do seem to be archaic – you just try explaining to a ten year old kid with an iPhone the sheer wonderment and allure of Snake on a Nokia phone. Rather than it being that we are looking back too soon, the pace of change has been such that this is viable. Of course, as with any nostalgic look back, the view is somewhat hazy and the glasses smeared with the fingerprints of selective editing. 1997 may have been a buoyant year of optimism, the rising wave of Cool Britannia seeing the labour landslide election victory, Oasis made history in 1996 playing to 250,000 people at Knebworth, and British music once again flew its flag on both sides of the Atlantic. But what about the Rwandan mass slaughters that shocked the world, the pound’s economic decline, as it dropped out of the ERM for the second time in 1993, and the largest ever IRA bomb to hit the British mainland exploding in Manchester injuring at least 200 people in 1996…not to mention that, despite all our hopes, football did not come home. But, why not focus on the good? Taking George Santayana’s famous quote for our own ends, we know that the value of history and knowing what has happened in the past is to ensure that we learn and do not make similar errors. So, perhaps this is exactly what the 1990s revival is – people taking what they loved, what made them happy, and sprinkling a little of this nineties magic into 2011.
Win with WIN Southern Comfort & Cola! No doubt about it, we all love festivals! But Southern Comfort knows festival revelling comes with a price. You have to make peace with the mud, plan a stake out to get a good spot for your tent and lug all your kit across what seems like the largest field ever! This year Southern Comfort has teamed up with Who’s Jack to make things a little smoother, with the chance to win the ultimate festival pack. We’re giving you the chance to win a four pack of the perfect festival drink- new Southern Comfort & Cola - just crack open the can and enjoy. You’ll also be kitted out with a funky tent, retro style inflatable chairs, fluorescent body paint, and a fisheye camera to capture all of the good times! We’ll also throw in some Mardi Gras beads and a mask to add a dash of New Orleans to the party and ensure that your tent is the place to be once the sun goes down and the fun really begins. To enter simply email the answer the following question to : email@example.com Which of these are you most likely to sleep in at a festival? a) b) c)
Mud A tent A hotel
TAKE IT EASY, DRINK RESPONSIBLY For the facts drinkaware.co.uk Copyright © 2011 Southern Comfort. All rights reserved. Southern Comfort is a registered trademark.
Using the brat-pack films as an accurate historical account of at least parts of the 80s, you can deduce that characters like Pretty In Pink’s Blane were the coolest. They had all the friends and they got the girl. Although every girl would secretly give a free underwear pass to Duckie instead, times sure have changed. It was a thing even when I was in high school that being weird or dorky was not the way to impress anyone in Great Britain, but now, judging from friends with siblings, it is OK to openly like Pokemon and have weird hair and still mix with the grime set. This was unthinkable as recently as 2000. When you finish school, a lot of kids go to sixth form, and from there, there’s Camberwell, Goldsmiths, Chelsea, Wimbledon or Ravensbourne where you’re actively encouraged to be as fucking weird as you want. Just look at Weird Science. It was a bratpack movie where two hopelessly awful nerds somehow manage to make Kelly LeBrock from a crude internet made up mainly of laughing skulls and quasi 3D graphics. I could talk about Weird Science for ages and the implications of double-teaming LeBrock which crop up just about every five minutes after she’s made. But the fair-haired almost ginger nerd Gary Wallace is the real talking point. Although Wallace is portrayed as the dorky wing-man to Wyatt (who he shares showers with) I’m pretty confident right here, in 2011, he would be the Nerd King of Peckham. Wallace is socially awkward and has a bizarre but totally sweet undercut, but he’s not afraid to talk to weird Cubans in
dive-bars. If Wallace was around right now he wouldn’t even need to scan that Playboy into his computer and share Lisa with that jerk Wyatt, he’d have a girlfriend anyway. Another 80s nerd who’d definitely get the girl would be Crispin Glover as George McFly in Back to the Future. In the film, he’s characterised as an abominable geek whose only interests are sci-fi comic books and having asthma attacks. I guarantee with that excellent throwback outfit and slicked-back hair he’d do at least OK. Marty McFly is supposed to be the cool one but in this day and age he’d struggle to find company with anyone except the students riding on the end of dubstep’s coattails at parties in Guildford. Then there’s Garth from Wayne’s World. He was sick at the drums and wore a ton of denim. Everyone is dressing like Garth to some degree now. I’ve got proof. Have you seen Tavi Gevinson, ever? She is 15 and runs a blog called The Style Rookie. She started it when she was 12. It’s pretty remarkable she’s got the commitment to actively update a blog at that age anyway, even more remarkable is it’s not on Livejournal like every other 12 year old’s blog. The updates aren’t mostly System Of A Down lyrics applied to her shitty high school either. Instead she’s managed to draw the attention of the entire world and become BFFs with Karl Lagerfeld. What is really amazing is Gevinson dresses like your grandma minus the colostomy bag - all the time. She’s not sitting on the living room komode and watching Emmerdale, though, she’s just blogging and partying and getting sent free shit all the time by every brand which wants to make it into Lagerfeld’s tinted radar. It won’t be long before we’re all dressed in creepy, patterned mu-mus, talking about Whitehouse records and not even bragging about being vegan. Although I’ll personally never give up bacon and it’s not everyone’s cup of tea it’s kind of cool Revenge Of The Nerds is actually happening.
People watching is my favourite past time. It makes long periods spent on my own bearable. Everyone that knows me well is aware that I always need to sit looking into a restaurant – I love spying on others and squirming at the awkwardness of the couple across the way who have come out for a lovely meal together but are yet to say a word to one another. Eateries are great for watching the world go by…but train stations are best. As my Uni tutor used to tell me, they tend to be where the country’s ‘frog spawn’ hang out, so it’s always good for a laugh. Or maybe a cry. (A pity cry, obviously). It’s all very Jeremy Kyle. Unfortunately, when I’m spending time at a station, it tends to mean I’m about to get on a crappy, smelly, bound to break down train. I pretty much spend half my days waiting around at London Bridge for the next train to my not-on-the-tube home. The other half’s spent in the carriage, waiting to get moving. Yes, public transport may be an excellent means of spying on people, but my God is it a pain in the arse. Don’t you think people take on a whole new level of annoying on trains? Everything they do annoys me or icks me out. Thank you Lord for anti-bacterial hand gel. For starters, I get so wound up when people listen to their music stupidly loud in their ears when I’m trying to have a cheeky nap en route. But I also hate it if I feel like my fellow riders are judging me for listening to my music too loud. Hypocrite much? (It’s worst on buses when chavs feel they have the right to play their shit tunes out loud). Unfortunately, my music couldn’t drown out the vomming man on the last train home the other week. This bloke looked quite respectable - suit ‘n’ all - but he was puking all over the shop, which rather ruined his image. And he WOULD NOT STOP. It just kept coming and coming. It then started to dribble down the carriage. Of course, we’re in London, so nobody offered the man a tissue - we all just feigned ignorance. Not one of my top moments. Or one of his. I’d take Mr Puke over my public transport drama in Thailand though. It’s a wonder anything ever gets done over there. After hours of to-ing and fro-ing and trusting we were being shoved on to the right vehicles going to our desired location, or hoping the boat wouldn’t tip over, or praying we wouldn’t be sick from the heat and one too many the night before, we were pushed onto a public bus. But we weren’t pushed in through the door – that’s too conventional, apparently. Oh no, we were put in the luggage department. Rucksacks, suitcases, bags and all. Dim lights, no seats, luggage for floor. After four hours hunched over and feeling like the bus driver’s dirty little secret, we crawled out into the light of day, hoping we hadn’t been taken to a far off land. Much to our delight – well, relief – we were where we wanted to be. But the torrential rain was not welcome. Nor was my aching back from being hunched over into a funny shape like a rucksack. And my public transport career has many more stories to tell. Having to pretty much navigate an assault course
with a massive backpack on then walking what can only be described as the plank before boarding a small, crowded boat was also a low-point. Or the overnight train where our beds were infested with cockroaches and the sound of the train on the track was so loud it pierced my ears. OK, an exaggeration…but I got a crap night’s sleep. There was another time when I was made to stand at the end of the carriage for most of the journey – standard crowded British train journey. The probability there was a weirdo somewhere close by was pretty high. It didn’t take him long to rear his peculiar head. This particular specimen had a young child, who he was hell-bent on showing off to anyone that would pay the slightest bit of attention. He then decided to play a little game with her, which consisted of her rifling through handbags and seeing what she could find. So he volunteered mine. ‘You don’t mind do you? You haven’t got anything sharp or dangerous in there have you?’ I can’t say I really consider the hazard of my handbag to a baby when I pack it in the morning, but I told him there wasn’t anyway and hoped for the best. For some reason, I let the little brat go ahead and play…wishing and hoping and praying she wouldn’t haul out a tampon and show it off to the carriage, or get hold of my potentially harmful tweezers and poke them in her eye. Awkward. As much as public transport and the people on it wind me up, I guess it has its plus points. How great is it when you put a good tune in your ears and look pensively out the window? Hello film star! I immediately feel like I’m an actress in a movie, or maybe in a music video, and everything takes on an extra dimension. I sit and I think and I engross myself in the music, and when the song comes to an end I fall back to reality and realise I’m a massive embarrassing twat, and no-one should ever know that’s what I do. But you do it too, right? Enjoying a good book is also an enjoyable luxury on a train – reading when in a car just makes me want to hurl. But once I’m involved in the story, I’m pretty much immediately brought down to earth with a bump and an apologetic announcement from the conductor, who is without fail in a complete grump. But let’s keep our glass half full, shall we? If journeys all went smoothly every time – you know, trains running to schedule, no oddballs sat around, smooth, simple, enjoyable, even– it would take some of the excitement out of life, wouldn’t it? Dare I say, it all might get a bit boring. And predictable. Imagine that.
After last month, the chips were down and just when it seemed like only a filthy rich banker could save the day, I came across the neat and polite guy. Now, I know what you’re all thinking, a neat, AND polite man, in London? And you’d be right to doubt it. No, this little chappie (suddenly he’s a small, white Scottie dog), was from Bristol. For those of you who’ve never ventured out of zone 4, a) you should because you can go to ESSEX and b) Bristol is a cosmopolitan city in that place that people refer to as ‘The West Country’. It’s about 200 miles West from London. It’s probably in about zone 154. Now, let me give you a little bit of background about this magical place called the West Country. They have funny accents that make them sound like farmers and it makes the Essex accent sound pretty God-damned nice. They are not in any particular rush to get anywhere, even work. In fact, they quite enjoy taking ‘the scenic route’. They are familiar with the words ‘please’ and ‘thank you’, and when they pass each other in the street they smile, and sometimes exchange pleasantries such as ‘good morning’ or ‘lovely day’. I know, I found it hard to believe too. But I went to Bristol, and the local people proved it all to be true. Shop assistants talked to me and old ladies smiled at me. It was like a whole other world. That smelt a bit like horse manure. It was as I was taking in the green grass of the West Country – okay, I went there to go shopping, anyway, it was there that I discovered the neat and polite, not to mention cute, guy. Luckily, his West Country accent wasn’t as pronounced as my Essex one and we managed to have a coherent enough conversation for us to swap numbers... I half expected the neat and polite man of West Country fame to suggest taking me on a hack, or to plough a field on our date. But instead, he was in London and he took me for a drink in Putney. He turned up looking very neat. His coat was neat and pristine, with an almost military look, his jeans were neat and fitted perfectly. His shoes looked like they had been shined – maybe people outside of London have time to do such things? – and his hair was immaculate. He looked like a school kid on his first day of school. (Except not, because that would be creepy). I half wondered if his Mum had even straightened his collar. I on the other hand, turned up representing the epitome of NOT neat. I was ten minutes late (no matter how hard I try, I’m always ten minutes late). I’d been a victim of the totally-mess-upyour-hair wind tunnel that occurs between the Central Line and the Piccadilly Line, at Holborn.
I had two bags, because I was going to a party later and had to change, and neither of them were hanging neatly from my shoulder. In fact, the strap of one was dragging along the floor. Smooth. Neat and polite guy didn’t bat an eyelid at my unkempt style, presumably because he was so polite. Instead, he offered to carry my bag, and when he carried it, it even seemed to match his neat, colour-co-ordinated outfit. Meanwhile, the crazy clashing prints of my own top and skirt were being blown around in the evening wind. Mr neat and polite was pulling off London chic, whilst I was trying to protect my dignity by desperately holding down my flippy skirt, and at the same time, resembling a slightly dolled-up scarecrow. Once we got to the bar, and I sat down with a large glass of wine, I suddenly felt less flustered. I apologised for being late and blamed the tube (when clearly it was the fault of my last minute shoe change), he wasn’t bothered that he’d had to wait ten, okay 15, minutes. He said he spent it people-watching. Polite, and kind of sweet. He bought all the drinks, even when I offered to get rounds. He opened doors for me and pulled out my chair. He took off my jacket and complimented my outfit. He was the epitome of the perfect gentleman. I was a bit gutted he didn’t ask me to do the foxtrot, as the date was otherwise resembling something out of a wartime novel/one of my Nan’s ‘back in the day’ stories. We talked about lots of things, some strange, some beautiful (like Kate Middleton, my new obsession). And he even took a photo for some girls who were sat in a booth next to us. He was bowling people over with his kindness and politeness, and not just me. He was the kind of man who girls claim they want to meet. He was someone you could take home to your Nan, without a shadow of a doubt. Your Mum would love him and your Dad would be put to shame by him, well, my Dad would. Your family would love him and your friends would say he was ‘the kind of man you deserved’ and ‘such an improvement on those cocky, arrogant dickheads’. And as I quietly pondered all of this, and the fact that I could go and stay in his riverside apartment and visit the WEST COUNTRY to go on romantic walks, and spend afternoons in country pubs. As I considered just what a gent this man really was, I realised, that I didn’t fancy him. Not even one bit. He was neat, but he made me feel scatty. He was polite in a way that made the Nice Guy seem like he had an edge. I’m sorry to say it, but give me a cocky, arrogant twat any day. Sadly, this leopard can’t change its spots, but hey, at least I tried.
PICK OF THE MONTH
The restaurant at Cigalon makes you feel like you are sitting outside in a perfectly sunlit courtyard when actually you are being kept safe inside from the unpredictable English weather under a roof with clever use of mirrors and hanging baskets giving the illusion of otherwise.
If you have seen our competition earlier in these pages to win a beautiful Globe bike then you will be thinking about places you could ride your possible prize to. We thought that for those already with a bike and those hoping to win one we should put together a little round up of some of London’s best cycle routes.
Food here is largely meat based and although portions are small (you’re not going to get a huge steak, more rack of lamb and suckling pig belly) you will be pushed to finish three courses as all are rich and surprisingly filling. The afore mentioned roasted suckling pig belly was a star of the menu being both perfectly crisp and melt in the mouth tender. Another highlight had to easily be the confit grapefruit and chocolate tartelette a more unusual marriage but a perfect combination of bitter verses sweet and light to boot. The staff are hugely attentive without being bombarding and you will be sure to get a very friendly welcome. www.cigalon.co.uk
Fair On The Green This Saturday (2nd July) will be Parsons Green Fair on The Green. The fair has been going for 20 years and has over 100 charity, community and craft stalls set up for the weekend as well as bouncy castles (child or not we all love a bouncy castle), carousels, bands, fire eaters and food stalls. Admission is free and the Fair runs from 12 midday till 5pm.
Regents Canal : Along this canal you can go all the way from Camden Lock through to Angel and see plenty of other cyclists and river boats along the way as well as a few waterside cafe and bar pitstops.
Waterloo Quarter Food Festival Get down to Southbank for some food at the Quarter Food Festival going on till the 31st July. Throughout the month there are various food related events including tastings in shops around the area, live music, cookery lessons and evening cocktails. There is also a contemporary local food fair being held in the Old Vic Theatre. There is no booking needed for events and entry to all are free. www.waterlooquarter.org
Paddington to Hayes : A little bit more of a challenging route and one that will take you a long afternoon with pubs on route and some lovely views and sites including the Hindu temple at Neasden. You can find the full route for this journey at Time Out. Twickenham to Canary Warf : This route takes you through Hyde and past the Albert Hall, along through Temple and Tower Hill, a good route to look at both city and greenery on the same journey. Find this route at www.bikely.com. Victoria Park to Epping Forest : You never know on this route you may see the new episodes of The Only Way Is Essex being filmed and if not, don’t be disappointed because you will see some lovely woodland in the mean time. You can find this route at www.cycle-route.com. Hamersmith to Hampstead: Again at www.cycle-route.com you will find this map that takes you from Hammersmith to Hampstead. You will pass through Bayswater and Hyde Park as well and riding past the Roundhouse and through Hampstead Village and Parliment Hill. The route is made up of parks and quite roads so great for anyone with a new bike they want to test out on a longer trip without going anywhere too busy.
Houses are The New bars A host of companies have recently popped up that offer you parties in your house rather than going out anywhere. You can get bars, bar staff, lights and drinks all to your place direct and then just invite a load of friends around and bobs your uncle - killer house party. For example Audio Sushi will send a DJ around to your house to properly piss off your neighbors, Liquid chefs will provide the drinks and bar as well as glassware and ice and Urban Caprice will be all ready to bring you round any food you want - win. www.liquidchefs.co.uk www.urbancaprice.co.uk www.audiosushi.com
PPQ presents Molotov Cocktail
Dri Dri St Martins Lane If you’re about tomorrow then we suggest you pop down to the St Martins Lane Hotel where Italian ice cream company Dri Dri will be giving out free samples to celebrate the opening of their new pop up parlour. The pop up shop, which will be open until 31 August, includes a Positano-inspired beach complete with pebbles and sand as well as deck chairs and beach cabins to get you in the summer spirit. Dri Dri will be serving their signature gelato ice creams including armartto, Sicilian pistachio, stracciatella and caffè espresso as well as some new flavours. www.dridrigelato.com
Coca-Cola Opens Retro Soda Bar At Selfridges For Coca-Cola’s 125th Anniversary this year they will be opening a pop up 1950’s style soda bar in Selfridges. The bar will be open for six weeks from Friday 17th June and can be found in the women’s street department on the ground floors. The bar will pay homage to the first ever soda bar opened back in 1926. The bar will have 50s styled waitresses serving perfectly chilled Coca-Cola in limited edition ‘Hutchinson’ bottles.
PPQ comes to the Hoxton Pony for a new monthly club night. Now we all know that Hoxton Pony has been around for a while and we also all know that it’s only really getting a load of attention now. But this is all for good reason. One thing we suggest here is to sign up for their membership as drinks and arriving late can be pricey. The membership card gives you cheap entry and 50% off drinks. Get to their website to sign up. So back to the PPQ night... The night is said to be a marriage of cool music, style and chic drinks and the first evening kicks off with Jimmy Dynamite, Percy Parker and guests DJing. A selection of rare northern soul will be played alongside 60’s specials from the likes of Amy Molyneaux & The Like’s Annie Monroe. If you get there early you can pick up one of the free Hoxton Gin’s in tea cups given away to arrivals at the beginning of the night. www.ppqclothing.com www.thehoxtonpony.com
St Martin’s Courtyard Garden Party The St Martin’s Courtyard Garden Party, A Thoroughly Modern Affair will be taking place on the Saturday 2nd July between 12 and 5pm. Sunday Girl will get the festivities going by declaring the Garden Party open and will then perform throughout the day for party goers. Other than live music there will be a salon fashion show on the bandstand at 1pm,3pm and 4.30pm, one-to-one style consultations from St Martin’s Court fashion expert, The Wardrobe Consultant, free fairy cakes and elderflower cordial at 3.30pm, magic shows, a fashion tombola and games with strawberries and cream and Pimms. www.stmartinscourtyard.co.uk
The Dishoom Chowpatty Beach bar This gem of an Indian street kitchen holds a pop up at Southbank this month until October. With quick, cheap meals starting at £16 and a bright elaborate decor, the kind of thing that pop ups on Southbank have become known for this bar as been described as ‘Bombay’s Chowpatty Beach in the Sixties... on acid’. A beach has been made that the pop up sits on just to keep it authentic and the chefs are all brought over from Mumbai to make sure the food is the same. A range os snacks, drinks and quick meals are on offer from Pimms with a twist to crunchy Bhel and slow cooked daal. Queen Elizabeth Hall Terrace, South Bank, SE1 Open Mon-Fri noon until late; Sat and Sun 10am until late until October 4 www.dishoom.com/southbank-pop-up
Waka on the Thames Want to do something a bit different? Get down to the River Thames on Friday 1st July to see an ornate carved Maori war canoe row down the river crewed by 16 Maoris of New Zealand’s Toi Maori and London’s Ngati Ranana in full traditional dress. See the Waka displayed alongside a Hakka in the afternoon with performances at 1pm-1.15 and 1.45-2pm. www.colf.org
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