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Tiny Talk West Auckland Parents Centre

Apr — May 2014|185

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This issue

The basics of attachment Learning is child’s play Why is my baby crying Grandparenting: giving & taking advice Bathing a baby Infant feeding

Avoiding Listeria

Birth Story Vanessa & Joshua

Positive birth experiences and informed parenting in a community


Special Features

From the Editor

Committee Bio—Dorothy Waide Getting to know the people behind WAPC.

Why do signs like this exist? This one is at Pak n Save in Pukehoke. Apparently it’s ok for my wife to shop there, but they do not want my money if I have Poppy with me. Maybe, I dunno, it’s a dumb sign though isn’t it. One would have thought we could’ve dispensed with all this gender nonsense by now. We’re all on this parenting journey together, let the poor man park with his baby if he wants to!

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The basics of attachment 6 Do attached babies more joyfully negotiate the world? Learning is child’s play But more is not necessarily better.

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Why is my baby crying? The $64,000 question.

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Grandparenting: giving & taking advice The rules, communication, dealing with the differences.

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Birth Story Vanessa & Josh.

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Bathing a baby Some tips.

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Infant feeding Parents Centre New Zealand’s position statement on infant feeding

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Avoiding Listeria Some timely information given the recent incidences.

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Unfortunately, a major part of my content did not get delivered in time for this issue. However I have quickly gathered a number of informative articles from our own members and Parent Centres affiliates that I’m sure you’ll find interesting.

Farvel,

Daniel

Regular Features From the President

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WAPC Volunteers of the Month

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Birthdays

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Welcome to our World

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Volunteer Opportunities

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WAPC: Parent Education

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Shopping for Baby

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WAPC Member Discounts

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Round the Coffee Cups

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Contact Us

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Parent Support—Directory

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Tiny Talk Contributions & Advertising

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Congratulations to Rebecca Bunting and son Jack. You are the winner of this issue’s cover photo competition! Your prize will be sent to you shortly. Don’t forget to send your entries in for the cover of the next issue. All unselected entries remain in subsequent draws.

COPYRIGHT - As the articles, recipes, stories etc. in this newsletter have been contributed, we are unable to guarantee originality and therefore cannot be held liable. Copyright held by contributors remains with the contributing party. Opinions and articles in this newsletter do not necessarily reflect the policies of Parents Centres New Zealand Inc or West Auckland Parents Centre. Advertising in this newsletter does not imply endorsement by Parents Centres New Zealand Inc.

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From the President Another two months has passed and time seems to be flying. My little boy has just turned one and as well as being a big celebration, it was also a reminder that I have now been President of West Auckland Parents Centre for 9 months, as he was only 3 months old when I took on the role. It's hard to believe I have nearly been in the role for a year.

We have had a large amount of interest in volunteering for WAPC lately, which is fantastic but we still need class hosts. If you are interested in hosting an antenatal class, or Moving, Munching and Motoring, or any of our other classes, please let us know.

As this issue covers April/May, I would like to wish all the mothers Happy Mothers Day for Following on from my report last issue, in which May, especially those for whom it will be their I said that we were cancelling our Baby and You first one. I hope you enjoy it and get a chance and Moving, Munching and Motoring classes, for a rest, even if it is only a for a little while. we have been hard at work trying to find ways to get those courses running again as we understand how valuable they can be to new parents. We hope to be able to announce very shortly when they will start again.

WAPC NOTIFICATIONS Annual General Meeting (AGM) Our AGM will take place on Thursday 26 June at 7:30pm at the Kelston Community Centre. Everyone is welcome to attend.

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Committee Bio — Dorothy Waide Hi, my name is Dorothy Waide and I became involved with WAPC on return to NZ as I wanted to work with a centre as I was training to be a CBE. Unfortunately due to my new business Dorothy Waide's Consultancy Baby Within Ltd I was unable to continue to study and have since stayed on as a volunteer. I do not hold a named role, I am a general committee, member helping out where I can, but I do volunteer my services as guest speaker for the Baby & You sleeping and settling classes which I enjoy immensely and love being able to contribute something to the community.

West Auckland Parents Centre relies upon the generous support of philanthropic organisations in the community. We take this opportunity to thank the organisations below for their

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The Basics of Attachment Babies who have an attuned, sensitive and responsive caregiver more skilfully and joyfully negotiate the world. Attachment is the way we relate to the important people in our lives. It is a key element of psychological and emotional well-being and forms our views about love and connection. The way we attach to others determines the quality of our relationships, how we see the world and the tone and depth of our lives. Our attachment style and patterns are grounded in our first experiences, namely those primary relationships of our first years of life. Children form attachments to their main caregivers. These primary attachments are fundamentals of life, as essential to growth and development as breathing and eating. When a child is consistently cared for by someone she knows and trusts, who can be relied upon to respond to her needs with sensitivity and warmth, a secure attachment relationship develops. Caregivers of securely attached children have the ability to make themselves available to their child for comfort and support when she needs them, and to allow her the freedom to follow her curiosity and explore her world in safe ways when she is ready to. This secure relationship gives the child confidence that someone will be available to help her when she needs it. She develops a model of other people as dependable and of herself as deserving of loving care. These models of the self and of others form the foundation of health that the securely attached baby will carry with her for life. However, if a child experiences care that is inconsistent, unpredictable, cold, hostile or scary, he is likely to develop an attachment that is insecure. Caregivers of insecurely attached children are typically uncomfortable with either too much closeness and neediness or too much distance and independence. Being insecurely attached to a caregiver as a baby means that a child has developed an expectation that the important people in his life will not be reliably and dependably available to him in times of need. The insecurely attached baby grows into a child (and then an adult) with fewer resources

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for managing his own emotions and his relationships with other people. Unlike a secure child, the insecure child cannot easily identify, understand, tolerate or communicate his feelings, leaving him vulnerable to a host of psychological difficulties. Being an insecurely attached baby is a risk factor for social and emotional problems throughout a person’s life including depression, anxiety, aggression and addiction, as well as a host of medical ailments as well.

Research on brain development has deepened our understanding of the sorts of caregiving that promote well-being in children. This work has confirmed the conclusions first made in attachment research. Babies who have an attuned, sensitive and responsive caregiver more skilfully and joyfully negotiate the world. They are happier, less stressed, more engaged; they recover more quickly from fearful or upsetting experiences and they fare better in social situations. While babies are born with genetic tendencies and potentials, it is their experiences that enhance or diminish these possibilities in life. Via these critical caregiving relationships, babies’ brains are literally being wired. When the neural connections follow a path and pattern of secure attachment, babies face the world with a map that allows them to function well in all settings. What can parents do? The fear that responding to a baby’s every need will


reinforce needy behaviour and produce dependency is a myth; in fact the opposite is true. Research shows that children who are consistently soothed and comforted and whose emotional needs are dependably met are the ones who emerge with the stability and independence we seek to promote. To raise securely attached children, parents need to be reasonably emotionally healthy themselves. Having good information about child development and parenting practices also allows parents to make decisions that support secure attachments. Holding realistic expectations about babies and having access to quality support are essential to feeling confident and satisfied as a parent. Parenting is hard work. It is also the most important work one can undertake. With each child we shape the future and how we do so is in our hands.

Parent Emotional Health Becoming a parent reawakens in us our own experiences of being parented and can evoke both joyful and painful feelings and memories… By coming to understand our own life course we open ourselves up to fully connecting with our children and promoting their secure attachment. Having a child changes your life forever. It opens your world to new hopes and dreams, new fears and struggles. At the same time, it can unlock the unfinished business and difficult experiences of our early lives. Becoming a parent reawakens in us our own experiences of being parented and can evoke both joyful and painful feelings and memories. We all want to be good parents and raise securely attached children. However, how we parent and respond to our children is heavily influenced by our early life experiences. We may not have had a perfect childhood, but through those first relationships we learned about love. Those models and lessons follow us into parenthood, just as they did for our parents before us. As a result of learning these lessons, we each possess great strengths, and weaknesses as well. In spite of this, we are not predestined to

recreate the same sort of childhood for our own children that we experienced ourselves. There are many things that parents can do to improve our parenting, free ourselves from acting upon harmful messages we have received, and help our children be healthy and happy. For example, we can learn about child development so that we are working from a realistic set of beliefs and expectations. We can also learn strategies and skills for interacting with children in positive ways and for handling the challenging issues of childrearing well.

“To raise securely attached children, parents need to be reasonably emotionally healthy themselves” One of the most intriguing findings of over 3 decades of attachment research is that secure attachment in a baby is strongly related to his primary caregivers’ own emotional health. One hallmark of emotional health in parents is the ability to deeply understand themselves and their early life experiences. This ability may not come naturally to some parents, but it is an ability that can be learned and strengthened. Another hallmark of emotional health in parents is the ability to think about the experiences of their baby. A baby who has a caregiver who is thinking about him as a person with his own thoughts, feelings, and motivations, and who can think about things from his perspective, is more likely to develop a healthy sense of himself.

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Learning about the components of optimal parenting and healthy attachment can often evoke sadness. We are faced with the disappointing awareness that our growing up may have included experiences that were not in our best interest. At the same time, we may feel guilty about how we have interacted with our own children as we learn more about what children need.

wanting to withdraw: these are all indicators that the feelings and experiences of our childhoods are colouring our current interactions. When we find ourselves unable to examine what our babies really need, when we worry excessively about what others think of our parenting, when we blame our children for our own strong reactions, then we can be sure that we are in the presence of unresolved issues from our past. It is important to understand that most of the issues we Thankfully we don’t have to stay stuck here. We can faced in our own early years are part of a pattern of move forward. many generations. We are not responsible for the messages we received. However, those messages To deepen your ability to understand your child and shape the way we form attachments, and most often yourself, start drawing up a new map for yourself and we are unaware of their power. It is by gaining new your relationships, and build your emotional health, it awareness that things can begin to change. We can’t helps to have someone to talk to who will be able to change the past. But we can start to make changes in listen to your thoughts and feelings and to help you to what we do now. When we do this, we build upon the organize them and make sense of them. (Talking about foundation of positive events from our past and join your reactions to your child can often be especially that with new ways of being that enhance our ability to valuable.) This can be done, for example, with a trusted form healthy attachments. friend. Often, when parents share their experiences and feelings about parenting, they find that they have As we know, our brain is built upon experience. The much in common and can use their shared experiences human connections we make create the neural as a starting place for exploring their feelings at a connections in our brain. If we had a childhood with deeper level than they normally may. Many people find high levels of stress, little expression of affection, it helpful to explore the unfamiliar territory of their strained communication, neglect or trauma, our brains emotions and history with a counsellor or therapist – developed accordingly, creating a mental map that an objective listener who is on your side, is skilled at allowed us to navigate those obstacles. That our brains helping people reach a deeper understanding of are able to do this – to design a strategy for what we themselves, and does not bring her own agenda or faced – is remarkable and a testament to our personal needs into the conversation. In all cases, the freedom strength and our instinct for survival. to explore our emotional states knowing that we won’t Unfortunately, that map is often misguided. While we be judged is a very powerful form of support to help us all share the desired destination of healthy become more healthy adults and more capable relationships, some of us follow a path that leads us parents. into painful, harmful or distancing ways of relating, The reward for undertaking the journey of selfthus making the outcome much less than we’d hoped understanding is a better relationship with ourselves for. These situations require new maps. Thankfully the and with our children. Put simply, when we are able to brain is always open to change. With each new relate to and nurture ourselves we will be able to do interaction we can restructure our mind and invent this with our children, too. By coming to understand better ways of being. The first step is realizing that our our own life course we open ourselves up to fully old map isn’t working. Having a child often brings us to connecting with our children and promoting their this awareness. secure attachment. If you find yourself repeatedly experiencing Article courtesy of www.centreforattachment.com overwhelming or intense reactions toward your children, it is a sign that your map needs revision. Feeling extremely angry, yelling, high levels of stress or anxiety, noticing discomfort at our babies’ needs, 8

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Learning is Child’s Play By Keryn O’Neill, MA Psych The message that the first few years of life are extremely important for brain development is becoming more widely known. What may be less clear is how to put this knowledge into practise. Parents wanting to give their child the best start are faced with a huge variety of choice and much commercially-driven pressure to ensure that their child makes the most of this developmental opportunity. The bewildering number of toys and activities currently available for our babies and young children is enough to send parents’ cortisol levels into orbit. And that’s before the credit card bill arrives. Children need stimulation, but as with many things, moderation is key. More is not necessarily better. Many children today are at risk of being overstimulated or over-scheduled and this can actually impede rather than encourage their optimal brain development.

pans can also provide many hours of fun and learning. The toys and activities that offer the most stimulation for a growing brain often don’t have the “educational” label on them! Learning and brain development is not limited to toys and activities specifically created for children, but also by following their interests in participating in the real world. Household activities that most adults consider work are also rich with opportunities for learning. Hanging out the washing, baking, grocery shopping and weeding the garden provide many opportunities for exploration and learning - and while the task inevitably takes longer, it can be much more fun for the adult too.

Everyday life is full of naturally occurring learning opportunities. Watching the rubbish truck, road works, rain going down the drain, or a rainbow, can capture the interest of a child when shared with a During the first years of a child’s life it is play, not parent. Take time to stop, observe, and talk with your scheduled instruction, which contributes the most to child about the things happening around them, and brain development (Frost, 1998). We don’t need to when possible move on only when your child’s formally “teach” our young children in order for them interest is waning. Be confident in the knowledge to learn. Children have their own interests and by that you have just provided them with the being supported to follow these they are likely to be stimulation they need, and it didn’t cost a cent! getting the stimulation that they need. Rich sensory experiences that are so vital for optimal Play provides a wonderful opportunity for parent and brain development are readily available in nature. child to have fun together, deepening their Playing with the sand at the beach, feeling the bark relationship. Children also need opportunities for on trees, smelling flowers, or listening to birds some play on their own. This provides many singing, enjoyed with a loving parent all provide opportunities to develop their imagination, problem- stimulation prompting brain connections to form. solve and develop other skills that are less likely to Sensory experiences can be a messy business and develop in adult-directed play. At times, boredom children benefit from being able to enjoy such may provide the impetus for the child to make their experiences fully, without anyone worrying about the own discoveries and create their own fun, fantastic washing! life skills and great stimulation for a growing brain. Playful, creative children who have had plenty of Simple toys that allow children to use their unscheduled, non-screen (TV, computer etc) time for imagination and creativity have many benefits over play throughout their early years are more likely to the endless plastic creations currently available arrive at school with their natural curiosity intact and (Ginsburg, 2007). Blocks, play dough, a sandpit, a strong desire to learn that will benefit them more versatile dress-ups (as opposed to Disney inspired than those whose infancy and pre-school years have ones), crayons and paper provide endless options. been filled with scheduled activities and little time for Household objects such as boxes, blankets, pots and play. 10

West Auckland Parents Centre


Why is my baby crying? We used to be told (and you may still hear this) that if first place. She will just be crying because she a baby was clean and fed that would settle him, or can't stop and will be much harder to settle. On you could leave him cry so he wouldn't be 'spoilt'. the other hand, if you keep your baby close, you will get better at reading her cues and soon you This tugged at a lot of parents' heart strings because, may be able to avert full blown crying episodes. despite having a full tummy and a clean nappy, babies do cry—crying is your baby's language. At first, Hunger: Your newborn's stomach is only the it is pretty much the only way an infant can size of his tiny fist so it won't hold enough food communicate her needs and express feelings like to go long between feeds—day or night. If you discomfort, hunger, exhaustion, and loneliness. As are breastfeeding, it is particularly important to your baby grows he will learn other ways to respond quickly to hunger cues. A baby who is communicate—through facial expressions, body left to work up to a full-blown cry will have a more disorganised suck and may have difficulty latching on correctly (when babies cry, their tongues are pointed towards the roof of their mouths), or she may only suck for a short time before she falls asleep with exhaustion. Also, if you are breastfeeding, remember, the more your baby sucks, the more milk you will produce. He needs to suck long enough to get the more satisfying hind-milk, which is language and, eventually, by telling you how he feels higher in calories. The best way to do this is to and what he needs. watch your baby, not the clock, and allow your baby to decide when he is finished the first To help you calm the crying, here is a checklist of breast, before you switch sides. reasons why your baby may be crying and how you can soothe the sobs. Physical discomfort: Yes, your baby may be crying because he has a wet or dirty nappy. Or is Sensitivity to the environment: Some babies he hot? Cold? Itchy? Is he sensitive to your seem more sensitive to the world around them laundry detergent? Check there are no loose and become easily overstimulated—then they threads from clothing or socks wrapped around cry. In the early weeks, especially protect your tiny toes. If your baby is teething, ease painful little one's senses by avoiding sudden gums by giving him something cool to chew on. movements, changes in temperature, loud If he has started solid foods he may enjoy chilled noises, bright lights, and lots of handling by soft foods such as frozen slices of banana or 'icy 'strangers'. Respond quickly when your baby is poles' made from apple or pear puree (with unsettled—you can't spoil a little baby, but if supervision). Never give hard foods that may be you leave her to cry, she will become more a choking hazard as tiny teeth emerge and bite upset as her crying picks up momentum. Soon bits off. she won't even know why she was crying in the West Auckland Parents Centre

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Tummy pains: Although we now see 'colic' as a way babies behave rather than a 'diagnosis', this behaviour is often attributed to an immature digestive system and an immature nervous system. If your baby is unsettled and seems to have 'wind' pains, you could try some different carry holds to help her feel more comfortable. For instance, lie baby face-down across your arm, her cheek at your elbow, or carry her with her backbone against you, pressing her knees against her stomach. Alternatively, lie baby tummy-down across your knees, perhaps with a warm wheat pack on your lap. If your baby has a regular crying time or suffers from evening 'colic', try to pre-empt the wails with a combination of massage, followed by a relaxation bath about an hour before his usual crying time.

“Your newborn's stomach is only the size of his tiny fist”

suspected food for at least a week. Common culprits are caffeine, dairy produce (milk, cheese, and yoghurt), citrus, chocolate, and peanuts. Some babies may also react to food additives (in soft drinks or processed foods, passing through your milk), or chemicals such as salicylates, which are present in a range of otherwise healthy foods such as grapes, citrus, berries and tomatoes. For more information on food intolerance see the book or DVD Fed up by Sue Dengate: http://www.fedup.com.au Separation anxiety: Most babies go through clingy phases. Newborns depend on close contact to transition to the world outside the womb. Gently ease your baby's transition from womb to room by snuggling your newborn against your bare skin and heartbeat. Carrying your baby in a sling next to your body is a perfect way to help him feel secure and snug. It will also regulate his immature heartbeat, rhythmic movements and respiration, balancing irregular waking, sleeping and feeding rhythms.

It's also common for babies to become clingy at significant developmental stages. Just as babies have Reflux: If your baby is spitting up and vomiting; has physical growth spurts, neurobiology studies show constant hiccups; is a fussy feeder; chronically that dramatic changes take place in babies' brains irritable; uncomfortable when lying on his back; has a during the first year and these are followed by chronic cough and/or congestion and is very wakeful, marked leaps forward in cognitive development. This consider could he have 'gastro oesophageal reflux'? means that despite a calm, loving environment, some Firstly, have your baby checked by a doctor or ask for babies feel confused, frustrated or anxious as the way a referral to a paediatric gastroenterologist. Also they perceive their world changes, so they cling to consider whether his symptoms could be alleviated the only safety and security they know—You. by changes in your own diet (see food intolerances Is he unwell? Pain, fever and rashes may be below). Elevating your baby after feeds and when he symptoms of illness so observe your baby sleeps is helpful to prevent regurgitation of stomach carefully and seek medical advice if you have acids and your doctor may prescribe medication. A any concerns (you are never an overanxious good book to read is Colic Solved by Dr Bryan parent wasting a health professional's time— Vartabedian, a paediatric gastroenterologist and consider you are contributing to your doctor's father of two 'reflux' babies. kids school fees!). Food intolerance and allergies: If you are Article written by Pinky McKay. Pinky is an breastfeeding and crying spells seem to be International Board certified Lactation Consultant related to your diet, write down baby's crying (IBCLC) and author of Parenting by Heart, Penguin times and what you have eaten (or if your baby Publications. Courtesy of ASG.co.nz has started other foods, what has he eaten?). If Image from http://brightbabyhood.com there appears to be a link, eliminate the

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WAPC - Volunteer of the Month February—Catherine Matson & March— Megan Barwell Our Volunteers of the Month for February and March are our Co-Treasurers, Catherine and Megan. Both of them have been committee members for some time, and their role is often overlooked as it happens largely in the background. However they play a crucial part in our organisation, ensuring all our payments are made correctly and on time and our financial records are accurate. Recently they have also both helped out with hosting our antenatal classes. We would like to take the opportunity to thank them both for their hard work. .

Each Volunteer of the month receives a $25 bouquet from Amanda 4 Flowerz

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Birthdays Birthdays!

Celebrating 2 Years Celebrating 1 year Ruby Weir

Ryan Duncan

Toby Dalton-Brown Winslow Pook Mona Laban Ayla MacDonald Casper Grimme

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Welcome to Our World Class: Mon 5 Aug — 9 Sept Joanna & Brent

Charlotte

17/10/2013

Class: Mon 16 Sept — 21 Oct

Class: Sat 11 & 25 January

Kelly & Dan

India-Rose

29/10/2013

Samantha & Aaron

Hugo

18/02/2014

Tracey & Wayne

Boston

30/10/2013

Anna & Terry

Maxine

20/02/2014

Bobbie & Paul

Monty

25/11/2013

Maureen & Aderino

Cooper

24/02/2014

Jolene & Ramon

Kasey

02/12/2013

Robyn & Dan

Kate

28/02/2013

Ann & Paul

Isabelle

04/12/2013

Hire it from us! TENS Machine Helps to lessen contraction pain by stimulating certain nerves and muscles. Hire cost: $55, plus $55 bond Collect 2 weeks before EDD and return as soon as possible once baby has arrived.

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Grandparenting: Giving and taking advice Part of the enjoyment of being a grandparent can be not being responsible for the everyday, ongoing parenting of the grandchildren. Most parents look forward to the time when their children have children of their own and they can sit back and enjoy this ‘all care and no responsibility' time in their lives. If the only contact with grandchildren is the occasional visit or family get together, issues of discipline and differing expectations can most often be overlooked. However, in today's society, where grandparents are increasingly required to care for their grandchildren on a part-time or full-time basis, their views on preferred ways of parenting, compared with those of their children, are more likely to be an issue. For many young parents, views on parenting can include not raising their children the way their parents raised them. For this reason, many children decline to seek advice from their parents. In turn, the parents (grandparents) may be left feeling that their experience counts for very little and feel less inclined to communicate their concerns. House Rules Set appropriate guidelines. Even if you are not caring for your grandchildren on a regular basis, it's important that you set appropriate guidelines for when the grandchildren visit or are temporarily being cared for in your home. Discuss with your children any concerns, expectations, ground rules or code of conduct you think appropriate within your home. Ask your children how they would prefer you to manage inappropriate behaviour. Discuss nutrition and whether or not the children should be offered sweets, ice creams or fast food. Be clear on bedtimes if the grandchildren are staying overnight. Clarify any issues of safety. Be clear about who is expected to meet the expenses of the installation of

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safety harnesses in your car or safety proofing your house. Communication Support your children as parents, by keeping the lines of communication open. Resist giving unsolicited advice to your children. Support your children by continuing to be their parents, as opposed to taking over the role of parents to their children (your grandchildren). Give your children time and space to seek your advice and ensure they know that they can talk to you at any time. Suggest regular family get togethers to talk about issues and compare notes. Preferably meet for coffee or lunch, away from familiar territory. Ask your children how you can support their preferred ways of parenting. Cultivate respect and trust Cultivate a relationship with your children that is based on respect and trust. Your children are raising their children in an era vastly different to the era in which you raised them. Acknowledge your children's parenting style and respect their judgement and choices. Listen to your children's concerns if they believe their child has a learning problem. Acknowledge their concerns and take any advice and recommendations on board. Be reliable with the administration of any medication. Praise your children often on the great job they're doing as parents. Acknowledge your children's maturity and accept that they are old enough now to be independent and choose what they want for their children. Share the fact that, despite all your years of experience as a parent, you still don't know everything there is to know about parenting.


Refrain from undermining your children's confidence by being overly judgmental or critical. Don't compete for a grandchild's affection. The relationship you have with your grandchild is unique in what you can offer, encourage and share. Be united with your children in the all important areas of discipline and behaviour. Grandchildren get confused by mixed messages. Report back to your children with any concerns you may have regarding your grandchild's health, but leave the decision with them as to whether or not they seek further advice. Dealing with differences Despite open communication and a solid relationship with your children, there may come a time when differences in parenting style are difficult to overlook.

there's a problem, listen to their point of view and agree to observe and work together to rectify the behaviour. If at any time you feel your grandchildren are at risk, seek professional help. Get into the groove Be a trusted friend to your grandchildren. Make the most of your time with them by talking, sharing, listening and understanding. Be an ally and support to your children in their parenting decisions and enjoy offering wisdom, discernment, guidance, strength and experience....especially when it's asked for. Article courtesy of ASG.co.nz

Show respect for your children's decision, even if you find it difficult to agree.

Question their decision without being critical or applying your rationale. Voice your concerns in a supportive way, but at the same time, let your children know that their decision is worrying you and why. If you consider a decision to be detrimental to a child's physical or emotional wellbeing, ask to see supporting documentation (a medical prescription or psychologist's report) so that you are better placed to understand what is going on. Don't be blind to a grandchild's personality or attempts to manipulate your loyalty and affection to play you off against parents. If your children think

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Birth Story Vanessa and Joshua In anti-natal class, we acted through what a surgery room would look like when having an assisted birth via caesarean. I remember looking at all the people who would be in the room and the teacher asking how this would make people feel – terrified was the common answer. She explained that each person was there for us and our baby, to keep us safe – this is what I thought as I lay on the table, with my arms pinned down and my body shaking uncontrollably, ‘these people are here to keep us safe’. At 41 weeks I had no signs of labour. Baby was in the right position, so my obstetrician did a stretch and sweep. Two days later and not so much as a tingle when I sneezed and I was admitted to hospital to be induced. It was a relief, frightening and exciting to be finally getting things started. The drugs were administered at 11am and within an hour contractions had begun. We were allowed to leave the hospital and went for walks, had lunch and returned at 2pm to be monitored. At this stage contractions were infrequently 5 mins apart and lasting for 1 min. As all baby signs were ok, we went home to try and get some rest and to return at 5pm. After my obstetrician examined me, she advised on an epidural – this was a shock as I didn’t expect this suggestion so early in the process. I did however have an obstetrician for a reason, respected her advice and one was put in place. The idea of someone jabbing a needle in your spine, while trying to hold still in an awkward position and having contractions was daunting but achievable. The next stage was dare I say ‘cruisy’. The midwife completed paperwork while monitoring baby’s progress, the obstetrician went home for a nap and due to the epidural I lay in relative comfort waiting for the finale. A few hours later, labour had not progressed any further so they broke my waters and administered drugs to increase my contractions. Although baby had started to move down the birth canal, he now started to ‘retreat’. Upon examination, his skull bones were being pressed together which was a sign that a natural birth may not be the best option. We 18

West Auckland Parents Centre

were advised that we could continue as the baby wasn’t distressed, but to consider a caesarean as this was likely to be the outcome. We decided not to wait until baby became distressed and were prepped for surgery. The epidural wasn’t fully effective to one small area where I could feel contractions. This remained the case until after they had delivered baby. I’m sure it was only minutes but it seemed like the longest part of the process for me. Baby was born healthy at 12 pound 8 ounces at 11:57pm. His dad held him, keeping him safe until they stitched me together and then off to recovery where we could re-unite.

Got a birth story you’d like to share? Whatever, whenever and wherever it happened, we’d love to hear about it. Email your story (with a photo of you and your baby) to: newsletter@westaucklandparents.org.nz.


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VOLUNTEERS!

HOSTS! 20

West Auckland Parents Centre


West Auckland Parents Centre is a not-forprofit organisation entirely run by a team of volunteers. We have a fantastic team who are enthusiastic and committed to keeping our Centre running, but we need a few more willing hands to help out with a number of tasks. If you have previously indicated you might be interested in helping out on committee is now the time?.

Some of the available positions

Some of the roles we currently need some help with include newsletter co-editor (planning and collating content for Tiny Talk), parent education coordinator or bookings (booking members into courses, organizing hosts etc), social media co-ordinator (maintaining our social media presence on facebook and twitter) and a number of host and general admin tasks.

Venue Coordinator

Many of the roles can be done from home and require as little as a few hours every month.

Parent Education Coordinator Parent Education Bookings Newsletter Co-editor Librarian Membership Discount Coordinator Marketing Coordinator

CPR/Choking Course Host Moving & Munching Course Host 12 Months & Over Course Host Baby Factory Liaison Advocacy & Lobbying Social Media Co-ordinator

Just email info@westaucklandparents.org.nz for more details

Get Involved—Be a class host! Are you are starting to believe that all food comes served in plastic bowls and the latest chart hit starts with “The wheels on the bus”…? We have the perfect solution to get you out and about and spend some time with adults, who understand what this parenting gig is all about. West Auckland Parents Centre needs you to host a course. Hosting involves attending the course at Kelston Community Centre, setting up and making cups of tea, helping participants feel welcome and completing a small amount of paperwork for the course. In return, you are able to attend the course for free and also receive a small koha in return for your time and support of the parent education offered by WAPC.

CBE6/14

Mon 19 May to 23 Jun

CBE7/14

Tues 10 Jun to 15 Jul

CBE8/14

Sat 19 Jul & 2 Aug

CBE9/14

Mon 21 Jul to 25 Aug

CBE10/14

Tue 12 Aug to 16 Sep

CBE11/14

Mon 15th Sep to 20 Oct

CBE12/14

Tues 21 Oct to 25 Nov

CBE13/14

Sat 29 Nov & 13 Dec

Full training is provided. Just email info@westaucklandparents.org.nz for more details of up-coming courses you could host.

West Auckland Parents Centre

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Bathing a baby By Dorothy Waide Pre-bath First, arrange the baby’s clothes in the order in which they will be put on. For example, bottom on pile should be the outer clothes, next the nappy, and on top the vest. Lay out a towel and any other bathing products you need. Place your baby on floor to kick while running the bath – I tend to take the nappy off so they can have some ‘nappy free’ time. The room needs to be warm. Not draughty or too hot, ideally around 20 degrees Celsius. Running the bath How hot should the bath water be? The temperature of the water can vary from baby to baby, however it should not be extreme so neither lukewarm nor scalding hot. Again the depth of the water varies from family to family but I always suggest around 2 to 3 inches (5 to 7.5 centimeters). Check the bath by testing with your elbow; otherwise you can use a bath thermometer.

Your hand touches the water first so it's a double check to ensure the water is at the right temperature.

Remember as the bath is shallow, the water will cool off very quickly.

Remove hand from bottom and wash the baby in the following manner.

I tend to add olive oil to the bath – this helps with baby’s dry skin or skin issues. Just drizzle it in to the water like you would over a salad.

If bathing in the normal bathtub, once you have placed the baby in the water, you can let them free float as long as the water is not too deep. This gives you both hands free to wash the baby.

Eyes and Face For newborns I tend to wash their face before putting them in the bath and using cotton wool squares for the eyes (a separate square for each eye) and a face cloth for the face. I tend to wet these under running warm water and then wash the eyes first, wiping from their inner eye (nose side) to the outer eye. Then I wash their face again from the inner to the outer. I dry their eyes and face before putting them in the bathtub.

Hair/Scalp

Putting baby into the bath

I only tend to wash under the neck, armpits and bottom. Babies do not get dirty; bathing is just to freshen them up. If using body soap, use sparingly and once again, only under the neck, armpits and bottom.

With one arm holding the baby under the back of their neck (i.e. their neck rests on your inner wrist) and grasping their shoulder, your other hand under their bottom, lower the baby into the bath.

Using a sponge or cloth, wet hair thoroughly. Use a very small amount of shampoo (do not squirt this directly onto their hair/scalp) and using your fingers, lightly clean the scalp area. Rinse well, again using a sponge or cloth ensuring that you are rinsing their scalp as well as their hair. Body

Turn the baby over onto their tummy and in doing 22

West Auckland Parents Centre


this support their head by cupping their chin in your hand. This position enables you to wash the back crease of their bottom.

all the creases especially the neck ones then use a dry muslin cloth.

Dressing the baby Remove the baby from the bath and place on the I like to dress the chest first, sometimes a little tricky towel. Wrap the baby on the towel and carry them to with boys but as long as you are not too slow you can wherever you are going to dry and dress them. get the vest and nappy on before they have chance to wee. This is where laying out the clothes comes in Drying the baby handy as you start with the vest, followed by the Hair – you can firmly rub dry a baby’s hair ensuring nappy and finish with their remaining clothes. that you are drying their scalp as well as their hair. How often should you bathe a baby? Dry behind their ears making sure that you get right into the crease and that you are pat drying the fold This is optional, however, I like to incorporate it into a baby’s daily routine so I do it every evening at around between the scalp and ear. the 5 to 6pm feed. It is not bathing a baby daily that Also pat dry the baby’s skin – no rubbing. Dry under can lead to problems with their skin; it is the length of their neck, armpits making sure that you get right time that you keep them in the bath water. Whilst into their creases and dry the center and not just the babies may like lying in the water, it should take outside parts of these creases. longer to undress and dry and dress a baby than the time spent washing them in the bath. Turn the baby over onto their tummies to dry the back of their neck, back crease of bottom and back of their knee creases. Dorothy Waide is a qualified Karitane nurse and is often labelled as a “baby whisperer”. You can read Dry the palms of their hands and check between about her services at fingers and toes for fluff. www.facebook.com/BabyWithin If you find the towel is too thick or difficult to get into

West Auckland Parents Centre Benefits of membership Your annual membership subscription helps to enable West Auckland Parents Centre to advocate for West Auckland families from pregnancy to school. In return your membership gives you :  12 month subscription (6 issues) to Kiwi Parent magazine, full of helpful articles, useful product information and great inspiration for Kiwi parents.  12 month subscription (6 issues) to our Tiny Talk magazine for local centre news, local events, upcoming parenting courses, and topical articles.  Discounted prices for West Auckland Parents Centre parenting courses.  Discounted prices on a range of quality baby products.

 Discounted hireage.  Invitations to exclusive member only shopping days at selected major retails, such as The Baby Factory 20% discount day and Toy Factory pre Christmas sale.  Special member only discounts from WAPC Member Discount Scheme.  Special discounted membership rate for active committee members.  Free pregnancy, childbirth and parenting book library.  Coffee groups, support and social events. One major purchase at The Baby Factory Member Discount Day would cover the cost of your annual membership. One year membership $60 One year committee membership $20 West Auckland Parents Centre

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Infant Feeding Parents Centre’s position statement on infant feeding reads: “Parents Centre believes that breastfeeding is the best form of infant feeding and will promote this position as breastfeeding has nutritional, immunological and psychological benefits to the infant. Parents Centre holds the position that it will educate parents to enable them to make an informed decision about infant feeding and support them in their choice.” Why breastfeeding? Breast milk is indisputably nature’s way of making little humans thrive. It contains all of the nutrients and benefits of mum’s immunity. It is specially made for baby’s different ages and stages (nature is very clever!) and is all a baby needs until they are around 6 months old. Breast milk helps to protect babies against infection and is free, safe, environmentally friendly and ready to use!

encouraging and helping wherever they can, and in making mum comfortable and allowing her time to establish breastfeeding, is critical to successful breastfeeding. It can take about 6–8 weeks to establish breastfeeding and build up a good milk supply, and where possible, mothers should delay returning to the work environment as long as they possibly can. If you are returning to work, your employer is required, as far as it reasonable and practicable, to provide appropriate breaks and facilities for employees who wish to breastfeed their infants or express milk during work hours.* More information on these provisions can be found at https:// www.healthed.govt.nz/resource/breastfeeding-andworking

*These provisions have been in place since 1 April 2009, under section 69Y of the Employment Relations Act 2000. Further, The Employment Relations (Flexible Working Arrangements) Amendment Act 2007 Breastfeeding can be easy to establish, but provides certain employees with the right to request a sometimes challenges do arise. It is important to find variation to their hours of work, days of work, or out as much as you can about breastfeeding before place of work. Check out details of the Act at http:// you have your baby, through antenatal classes, www.dol.govt.nz/er/bestpractice/worklife/ researching online, and through quality resources flexibleworkguide and books such as Best Feeding and The Womanly Art If you are expressing breast milk and your baby is of Breastfeeding (check out your Parents Centre under 3 months of age, all equipment will need to be library for these and other titles). Through reading washed and sterilised to prevent baby from getting and researching, new mums will better understand sick. For babies over 3 months, all equipment and the science of breastfeeding and, coupled with solid containers need to be thoroughly washed and rinsed support and encouragement, are much more likely to but not necessarily sterilised. successfully breastfeed. You can store expressed breast milk in an airtight Breastfeeding takes time to establish, and in the early container with a sealed lid for: days it’s important to make time to do so. In the early days, breastfeeding can be very time-consuming  4 hours at room temperature (keep it cool in a and it may feel as if you are achieving little in your damp towel) day – but you are achieving a lot! You are caring for,  48 hours (2 days) in the fridge loving, and feeding your baby; you are giving them  2 weeks in the freezer box in the fridge everything they need. The more time you take to  3–6 months in the separate freezer part of a relax and spend quality time in this new role in the fridge-freezer early weeks, the easier life will be. Don’t underestimate the role of dad/the partner! The support role of baby’s other main caregiver, 24

West Auckland Parents Centre

 6 months in a separate chest freezer.


Always store breast milk in the bottom half of the fridge or freezer, towards the back and away from anything that may contaminate it – e.g. meat products. Remember to put the date on the container, and use the oldest milk first.

See ‘Human Milk for Human Babies – New Zealand Aotearoa’ on Facebook, or ‘Eats on Feets New Zealand’ on Facebook.

Your midwife or other lead maternity carer (LMC). Your local Parents Centre Childbirth Educator. Well Care Provider, Plunket (your local Plunket nurse and/or Family Centres) La Leche League – for breastfeeding information and breastfeeding support groups. Find a group near you at www.lalecheleague.org.nz What other options are there for infant feeding?

Your midwife, and your Well Care Provider, such as Plunket and Parents Centre Childbirth Educator, can provide assistance and support – do not hesitate to contact them.

The milk-sharing network Human Milk 4 Human Babies (HM4HB) is a steadily-growing community Be aware that artificial nipples – teats and dummies – with more than 15,000 members worldwide. Check can interfere with the establishment of breastfeeding out their international website at www.hm4hb.net so it is best to avoid these, especially in the early The most common argument against milk sharing is weeks. that there is the risk of disease from using For more information on breastfeeding, visit: unscreened donors. Research suggests that the risk of www.breastfeeding.org.nz and transmission of infectious diseases, such as hepatitis www.lalecheleague.org.nz and HIV, from sharing breast milk is minimal, as donors are already breastfeeding their own babies What happens when breastfeeding doesn’t go to and generally are aware of the lifestyle required to plan? produce healthy human milk. Breastfeeding may come with its challenges. In these Formula feeding instances, it’s important to get help early. With the right expert advice and assistance, and with a positive If you have received professional help and mind-set, most breastfeeding obstacles can be breastfeeding is not working out for you and your overcome. family, or if you choose to, infant formula is an option. Formula provides adequate nutrition for a So get help early baby until they can start solids around the 6 month These places give help and information about age mark, however it does not provide the breastfeeding and can support you through what can immunological and health benefits that breast milk be a very difficult time getting breastfeeding gives your baby. established. For further information on formula feeding, you can A lactation consultant – these can be hospital-based refer to the Ministry of Health website link as follows: or private. Phone your local maternity hospital or https://www.healthed.govt.nz/resource/feeding-your 0800 452 282 (during the day) for contact details of a -baby-infant-formula It tells you everything you need lactation consultant near you. to know in one easy link.

Advice from Parents Centre

Parents Centre is clear on our position: We promote breastfeeding as the best and normal form of infant feeding. We offer our support and encouragement to Milk sharing all parents, whatever journey they take and whatever Breast milk sharing is experiencing a revival, with new path they choose, or end up taking. We recommend mothers using online communities to help feed their you contact your Well Care Provider, Childbirth newborns with human breast milk. Yes, there are Educator or Lactation Consultant for further networks in New Zealand which put mums wanting information on feeding your baby. Some Centres donated breast milk and those with excess supply in offer phone contacts or support networks for baby touch with each other: feeding. West Auckland Parents Centre

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Avoiding Listeria What is listeria?

one of the few food bacteria that will grow on food even if it’s in the fridge and can withstand freezing. It is wise to store any perishable food in the fridge, but it is also important to use it within two days.

Listeria is a common bacterium, which can cause an uncommon but potentially serious illness called listeriosis. Listeria is found widely in soil, water, and plants and in the droppings and faeces of animals and Safety with food humans. You can keep food safe by: How do people get listeriosis?  avoiding cross-contamination by keeping Listeriosis is a food-borne infection that results from cooked foods and ready-to-eat foods separate eating contaminated food. In particular, ready-to-eat from raw and unprocessed foods products and foods with a long refrigerated shelf life  washing your hands, utensils and chopping are often linked to outbreaks of listeria. boards before preparing different foods, to Who is at serious risk of listeriosis? avoid cross-contamination

 

Pregnant women and their unborn babies Newborn babies

What are the symptoms? It takes between a few days and a few weeks for symptoms to show up. After being infected with listeria, you may have no symptoms at all or you may become ill with:

  

   

mild fever headache aches and pains.

You may also feel sick or vomit.

In a small number of cases these symptoms can progress to more severe forms of the illness, such as meningitis and blood poisoning.

cooking food thoroughly eating freshly cooked food as soon as possible after cooking storing leftover foods in cleaned sealed containeres in a fridge and using within two days reheating leftover food thoroughly so that it is steaming hot, that is, above 72°C. (Take special care to heat thoroughly and evenly when using a microwave oven by stirring frequently.) washing and drying whole raw fruit and vegetables thoroughly ensuring that food is eaten before the use-by date cleaning the fridge regularly and checking that the temperature is between 2–4°C.

In pregnant women, symptoms may be mild, but the Unsafe foods for people at risk: consequences can be severe as listeriosis can result in miscarriage, premature birth or stillbirth and can also  uncooked, smoked or ready-to-eat fish or cause severe infection in the newborn baby. seafood, including oysters, smoked ready-to-eat If you think you might have listeriosis, see your fish, sashimi or sushi* doctor.  paté, hummus-based dips and spreads How can listeriosis be prevented?  ham and all other chilled pre-cooked meat The risk of serious illness from listeria infection can products including chicken, and fermented or be reduced by safe food handling practices. Listeria is dried sausages such as salami*

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West Auckland Parents Centre


   

pre-prepared or stored salads (including fruit salads) and coleslaws raw (unpasteurised) milk and any food that contains unpasteurised milk* soft-serve ice creams soft, semi-soft or surface-ripened soft cheese (eg, brie, camembert, feta, ricotta, roquefort)*.

* Note that these foods are safe to eat if heated thoroughly to steaming hot, that is, above 72°C, where appropriate.

Safer foods for people at risk:

freshly cooked foods

   

pasteurised dairy foods, eg, milk, UHT milk, yoghurt hard cheese (eg, cheddar, colby, edam) processed cheese, cheese spread, cottage cheese and cream cheese. Eat these cheeses within two days of opening the pack.

 Purchase all cheese in sealed packs, in small

     

freshly washed vegetables and fruit freshly prepared salads bread and baked foods without cream or custard dried food cereals beverages.

More information Your local public health service can give you more information on food preparation, storage and safety; talk to your doctor or nurse or contact the Ministry for Primary Industries - food safety group, http:// www.foodsafety.govt.nz/ or Freephone 0800 693 721. Information courtesy of The Ministry of Health and adapted for use https://www.healthed.govt.nz/resource/food-safetyavoiding-listeria .

quantities and use by the use-by date.

Playtime

Homemade Finger Paint Fun!

You will need: 1/2 cup of cornstarch or 1 cup of flour 4 tablespoons of sugar 2 cups of cold water A pinch of salt Food colouring

Directions: Stir all ingredients together in a medium saucepan Cook over a low heat for about 10 minutes Stir the mixture until it is smooth and thick Turn off the heat and let cool Once cool, separate into containers and add colouring Store with lids tight so the paint won’t dry out West Auckland Parents Centre

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Volunteer Opportunities At West Auckland Parents Centre

Venue Coordinator Do you love to organise and have an eye for detail? Can you help? Then this is the role for you. We are looking for someone to organise all of our venue bookings. We do not have our own premise and therefore hire our rooms from the Council and other organisations. You will be liaising with our course bookings officers, other committee members as necessary and the Council to ensure that everything is booked, keys are with the right people and that everything is in order to make a smooth running class.

Course Host - Moving, Munching and Motoring Are you a people person? Be honest because we have the perfect role for you! Become a hostess for our Moving, Munching and Motoring Classes. Liase with the Educator and participants. Set up the room and provide the classes with info on products we stock. Communicate with the class regarding WAPC services and enjoy the social interaction. Come join the team today.

Marketing Coordinator We need a person to help market & publicise West Auckland Parents Centre including liaise with local press, assist with the advertising of courses and services, designing brochures & posters, compiling marketing lists and generally promote what we do. You will work closely with the Parent Education team to come up with ideas on how we can market courses and be actively involved in helping build/promote other areas of West Auckland Parents Centre business. This role would take around 2-3 hours per week but there is the opportunity build it to more if you were really keen. There is also a monthly committee meeting.

To apply for any of our volunteer positions or to find out more contact us on 837 8481, or info@westaucklandparents.org.nz

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West Auckland Parents Centre


Parent Education

Parenting Courses This is a 4-part daytime course covering essentials for parents in the ‘4th trimester’ (newborn to 4 months). Sessions include sleeping & settling, life changes, baby massage, and child development. It’s designed to help you understand and cope with your role as a new parent, or to refresh your skills if you’re doing it for another time around.

Baby & You

Each week we have a different expert speaker to pass on knowledge and ideas, and take your questions. The course runs for four weeks and each session is 2 hours from 10am– 12pm, at Kelston Community Centre, Committee Room. Our next course commences: 7th April. Please contact us.

Members: $50, support person free Non members: $60, support person $15 Know what to do in an emergency! This Saturday morning course is designed to give you hands on experience in CPR and choking skills. An essential class for all parents and caregivers of children under five, led by a qualified, experienced paramedic.

CPR & Choking

The course runs from 10am—12pm on a Saturday morning at Kelston Community Centre, Main Hall. Our next courses commence: 12 April & 17 May Please contact us. Members:

$20, support person $10

Non members: $30, support person $15 This is a two-part daytime course for parents of 4-7 month old babies. The first session covers starting solids, crawling to walking, developmental toys, and safety. Participants receive a free copy of the fabulous recipe book Baby Food and Beyond by Alison and Simon Holst.

Moving, Munching & Motoring

The second session covers Top 10 car seat mistakes and what you can do to avoid making them in your car, how to choose a car seat to best suit your family and ensure it is correctly fitted in all situations. You will also see some of the latest research into keeping kids safe in cars, including why it is best to keep your child rear facing as long as their car seat will allow.

Sessions are 2 hours on two consecutive Fridays, 10am—12am at Kelston Community Centre, Activity Room 1. Our next course commences: 11 April. Please contact us. Members:

$40, support person free

Non members: $50, support person $15 NOTE: If you wish to book into JUST the motoring session, this costs $20 for members, $25 for non-members, and $40 for non-members bringing a partner.

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Shopping for Baby and You with West Auckland Parents Centre Chosen by parents like you, we have some fantastic products with some great savings, and ultimately you gain again as all profits go back into our centre to serve your community. Here is just a short selection from our online shop, sure to suit any budget. Order online www.westaucklandparents.org.nz/store

Eardrops Journey CD, Sounds of City/Country/ Home $15

Strawberry Jam Merino Wrap $45

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West Auckland Parents Centre

Little Snuggles Muslim Wrap Set $20

Amber Teething Beads $36

People Puppies Taggie Blanket $16

NZ Pregnancy Book $40 (Save $15!)


Kimberly Collection Woollen Blanket $66

Bellaroo Cotton Sling $60

Womama Birthing Wrap $99

For more baby products discounted for WAPC members, see www.westaucklandparents.org.nz West Auckland Parents Centre

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Discounts & Benefits

WAPC Member Discounts activities available in New Zealand. Henderson Megastore and Westgate store offer WAPC members 10% off all full priced products (some conditions apply).

SCAMPS BOUTIQUE - Scamps Boutique, eco products for mum, baby and child. Members who visit us online at www.scamps.co.nz will receive 10% off orders by using the code WAPC. 5% of all orders using the WAPC code will go to the West Auckland Parents Centre. SPORTS4TOTS - Our fun, structured programmes provide preschoolers with a grounding for an active future in sport. Give us a call on 974-3644, let us know that you are a WAPC member and you will receive a 10% discount. www.sports4tots.co.nz GRASSHOPPER KNEES Learning Leaps is a programme with books, toys and fun and easy tips, games and activities to grow kids’ intelligence over all areas so they get the balance they need to fully reach their potential and do well in school. WAPC members who shop online at www.grasshopperknees.co.nz and enter the code parent1 will receive a 10% discount.

HARVEY NORMAN HENDERSON Electrical Department - Come visit us at Harvey Norman Henderson and upon showing your WAPC member card to one of our friendly sales team you will receive a 10% discount in our electrical department on not already discounted products (some conditions and exclusions may apply). FIT FIT FIT provide group exercise programmes for new mums and mums-to-be using the most up to date research available. WAPC Members will receive a 10% discount on Fit Bumps and Fit Mums classes. Call us on 360-0620 or check us out online at www.fitfitfit.co.nz KID ACTIVE HOLIDAY PROGRAMMES - With over 100 courses to choose from, Kidactive offers a huge range of fun hands on experiences for children aged 4 and older. Give us a call on 974 5135, let us know that you are a WAPC member and you will receive a 10% discount. www.kidactive.co.nz BABY ON THE MOVE - The Baby On The Move team are specialists in the rental and sales of all baby products and services. Come in store for some great savings, including 10% off all hires with a WAPC card.

BREASTMATES - Breastmates is all about motherhood. With maternity wear, breastfeeding clothes & accessories, body care TOYWORLD HENDERSON AND WESTGATE & baby gear, members get free postage using Toyworld is New Zealand’s largest retail chain the discount code: WESTPC at checkout. See of specialist toy stores with the biggest range of www.breastmates.co.nz toys, games, puzzles, and indoor & outdoor 32

West Auckland Parents Centre


West Auckland La Leche League West Auckland La Leche League welcomes mothers and pregnant women to their monthly meetings for encouragement, support and discussion on a wide range of breastfeeding, mothering and parenting issues.

No booking required Kelston Community Centre, Activity Room 2 Cnr Awaroa & Great North Rd, Kelston 2nd Tuesday of every month, 9.45am

Coffee morning 4th Tuesday of every month, please call for details For further information or breastfeeding help, please contact an accredited Leader:

West Auckland Parents Centre Committee Meeting Interested in volunteering? You can attend a committee meeting to see if it’s for you. Meetings are held on the 3rd Wednesday of every month. Please email president@westaucklandparents.org.nz if you would like to attend.

Slingbabies Find out how to wear your baby. First Friday of every month, 10am to 12pm Sturges West Community House, 58 Summerland Dr, Henderson ww.slingbabies.co.nz

Your Fast Shop EASY SHOPPING—EASY FUNDRAISING Step 1: Go to www.yourfastshop.co.nz Select: W est Aucklan d Pare nts Centre Start: B r ow sing yo ur favour ite stores.

That’s it!  No parking, no petrol costs, no aching

Did you give birth at Waitakere Hospital ? Waitakere Maternity Unit values feedback about the service they offer to the women and families in our community. Sue Fitzgerald, Community Manager, and Helen Ngatai, Facility Manager, would be very open to any invitations to visit groups of women who have birthed at Waitakere Hospital and who would like to give feedback on their experiences. Email Sue sue.fitzgerald@waitematadhb.govt.nz

 Great deals at great stores, including

Do you have a hidden talent you would like to share?

Apple, Ezibuy fashion, Mighty Ape Toys, and FREE DVD rental at Fatso.

Become a volunteer with West Auckland Parents Centre!

feet!

 Save $70 on printer ink and other items at Snatch A Deal

Check out our current opportunities in this issue.


Sponsored by

Round The Coffee Cups Chat from inside one of our coffee groups By Stephanie, Maria, Ghaz, Juliet & Sarah When and how often does your coffee group meet? Usually for morning tea – fortnightly. What stage are your babies at? What is the boy girl ratio? 4—5 months old.

Sarah – Zip or Velcro swaddles & “The Wonder Weeks” book. What have been the greatest challenges so far? Stephanie – Lack of sleep, dealing with crying, conflicting advice & the total change of our lives.

What Is the boy/girl ratio?

Maria – Breastfeeding.

6 Boys, 5 girls.

Ghaz – Breastfeeding & day sleeping.

What other activities has your coffee group tried?

Juliet – A baby whose sleep got worse rather than better like you’re told!

Wriggle & Rhyme, Pram walks, Café Outings. Being a parent has taught you.... Stephanie - Patience, Love, and the smiles & cuddles make it all worth it. Maria - It’s the hardest job in the world! But the most rewarding one. It has taught me to be patient & that things cannot always be perfect. Sometimes you can’t dictate your day as you wish & that the here & now is what matters. It has taught me that this craziness is ok and that every day is a new adventure & new learning experience. Ghaz – I can’t always fix or control the situation but to keep looking for solutions. Being patient. The unconditional love you feel. I don’t need 8 hours sleep every night to function. Juliet – Time management, love and patience. Sarah – A new respect for all women, especially mothers. Acceptance, love & perseverance. Best baby product you’ve tried? Stephanie – Miracle Blanket, Barrier Cream, Infacol, Disposable Nappies. Maria – All of them! Anything that makes things easier! Dummies, swaddle wraps and sleep wedge. Ghaz – Angel Care Baby Monitor (for peace of mind), front-pack, baby bouncer & Ranitidine (for reflux). Juliet – Ergobaby Carrier (would be lost without it)

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West Auckland Parents Centre

Sarah – Breastfeeding, The upheaval a baby brings to your relationship, constantly wondering if I am doing the right thing, and adapting to an ever-changing baby! What’s the best thing about being in this coffee group? Stephanie - It is a small group where everyone is dealing with the same challenges. Sharing experiences. Everyone is honest & helpful. Maria – We are all in the same boat and we are all honest with each other which is what you need. And we have fun! Ghaz – Support, advice and understanding. Juliet – Our honesty. We aren’t afraid to admit our difficulties and ask each other for ideas. Sarah – The honesty, support, humour and understanding.

Any tips for new parents? Stephanie – Be flexible and willing to take advice and adjust expectations because nothing goes to plan. Ask for and accept help. The first 10-12 weeks are the hardest. Lack of sleep will be difficult to deal with so sleep when you can. Breastfeeding isn’t as easy as everyone says and it does hurt. Maria - Be patient! Nothing can prepare you for this, but you learn as you go. Ask for help when you need it, and whatever decision you make will be good and


don’t feel guilty about it. And enjoy – time goes fast.

Ghaz – Don’t feel that you’re a failure if things don’t go according to the books. Breastfeeding is an art and takes a lot of practice – in some cases it is not possible to breastfeed and that’s ok. Juliet – Caffeine. And try not to wish away those early weeks – they go so quickly anyway! Sarah – Establish a bedtime/naptime routine as soon as possible so baby associates this with sleep. You’re not going to enjoy every minute and that’s ok/ normal. Sometimes babies are what they are, and sometimes you need to take action if you want things to change – so don’t be afraid to experiment a little!

Tell us about your coffee group and receive a $50 voucher for your coffee group to use at Mozaik Email us for more info

West Auckland Parents Centre

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West Auckland Parents Centre Ph. 837 8481 (answerphone) PO Box 83-192, Edmonton, Auckland 0652 www.westaucklandparents.org.nz

Committee Contacts President

Teresa Cooper

president@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Vice President

Daniel Mapletoft

vicepresident@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Secretary

Rebecca Crewe-Lui

info@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Co-Treasurers

Catherine Matson Megan Barnwell

treasurer@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Membership Coordinator

Teresa Cooper

membership@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Parent Education Coordinator

Can you help?

info@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Parent Education Bookings

Can you help?

parented@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Products Coordinator

Christine Militoni

products@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Newsletter Editor

Daniel Mapletoft

newsletter@westaucklandparents.org.nz

E-News Editor

Muirie Cook

update@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Newsletter Advertising

Muirie Cook

advertising@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Grants & Fundraising Coordinator

Jess ie May

fundraising@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Librarian

Can you help?

librarian@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Membership Discount Coordinator

Can you help?

info@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Website Coordinator

Jessica Vroegop

webmaster@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Marketing Coordinator

Can you help?

info@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Events Coordinator

Lydia Dunn

info@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Venue Coordinator

Can you help?

info@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Volunteer Admin Coordinator

Jess Maher

info@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Childbirth Education Convenor

Carolyn Nielsin

info@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Childbirth Education Bookings

Amanda Galt

antenatal@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Baby & You Course Host

Nicola Mapletoft

parented@westaucklandparents.org.nz

CPR/Choking Course Host

Can you help?

parented@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Moving & Munching Course Host

Can you help?

parented@westaucklandparents.org.nz

12 Months & Over Course Host

Can you help?

parented@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Baby Factory Liaison

Can you help?

info@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Advocacy & Lobbying

Can you help?

info@westaucklandparents.org.nz

Social Media Co-ordinator

Can you help?

info@westaucklandparents.org.nz

36

West Auckland Parents Centre


Parent Support

Support Services Healthline (24 hours) 0800 611 166 www.healthline.co.nz La Leche League (Breastfeeding) Adith 834 1234 or Kristi 824 7019 Rebecca 412 8369 Kiri 32 9082 www.lalecheleague.org.nz

National Poisons Centre 0800 POISON (0800 764 744) www.poison.co.nz Miscarriage Support Auckland 378 4060 www.miscarriagesupport.org.nz Parent to Parent Special Needs Children Support 0508 236 236 www.parent2parent.org.nz Plunket

838 0981

Plunket Car Seat (Waitemata) 837 1871 6E Enterprise Drive, Henderson Plunket Family Centre 836 5730 Woodford Avenue, Henderson Womens Refuge 8361987 www.womensrefuge.org.nz Trauma & Birth Stress Support Group 575 7404 www.tabs.org.nz Post Natal Distress 846 6967 www.postnataldistress.org.nz Work & Income (WINZ) 0800 559 009 www.workandincome.govt.nz Working for Families 0800 257 477 www.workingforfamilies.govt.nz Waitakere Hospital Breastfeeding Classes Adith 838 9362 or Barbara 838 1566 Parent Aid

836 4122

Dial-a-Mum West Auckland Parents Centre have a wonderful team of people who are a good source of information for many common and not so common pregnancy and parenting. This is a free and confidential service. Our support people have information on organisations that can help if we are unable to. Breastfeeding— Nicole Snook 837 2501 Bottle Feeding—Nicola Mapletoft 832 5353 Post Natal Distress—Eileen Joy 818 8845 Miscarriage—Nicola Mapletoft 823 5353 Caesarean—Nicole Snook 837 2501 Homebirth—Eileen Joy 818 8845 Premature Birth—Amanda Galt 820 8085 Same Sex Parenting—Kristal O’Neill 832 8456 If you have any other queries or need advice or help with any other issue please leave your details on our answerphone 837 8481, for one of our committee members to contact you.

Playcentres

8278649

Citizens Advice Bureau Glen Eden Henderson Massey New Lynn

818 8634 836 4118 833 5775 827 4731

Asthma New Zealand 630 2293 www.asthma-nz.org.nz Immunisation Advisory Centre 377 7966 www.immune.org.nz Allergy New Zealand 0800 34 0800 www.allergy.org.nz Childcare Advisory www.childcareadvisor.co.nz

West Auckland Parents Centre

37


Cloth Nappy Workshops Pukekohe Wednesday 9th April, 10:00am - 12:00pm Franklin The Centre - Stevensen Room 10 Massey Avenue, Pukekohe Kelston Thursday 10th April, 7:30pm - 9:30pm Kelston Community Centre - Activity Room 2 Corner Awaroa & Great North Roads For more info, costs and bookings visit: http://www.thenappylady.co.nz/workshopsauckland.html

Postnatal Distress Support Group Meeting Every Monday 10am-12noon. Please call PND Support Network for more information and support or to see if this group is right for you. For more info call 836 6967 or go to www.postnataldistress.org.nz

Advertising & Newsletter Contributions West Auckland Parents Centre is an entirely voluntary organisation run by parents, for parents. Our advertisers help us to produce this newsletter to over 200 families with children up to five years old in West Auckland, as well as midwives, and other organisations that support young families. Ad type

Single issue

Pre-pay 3 issues

Prepay 6 issues

Full page

$75

$70 ($210)

$65 ($390)

Half page

$45

$40 ($120)

$35 ($210)

Quarter page

$35

$30 ($90)

$25 ($150)

Inside cover

$80

$75 ($225)

$70 ($420)

Back of magazine

$85

$80 ($240)

$75 ($450)

Newsletter Contributions: We would love to hear from you with any contributions or requests for Brochure Insert: We can include your flyer or articles. Send your material or requests by email to: brochure in our newsletter and Kiwi Parent Magazine newsletter@westaucklandparents.org.nz. Should you mail-out for a cost of $100. Material must be wish to contribute to our June/July 2014 issue, the forwarded to the Distribution Centre by the deadline. deadline for copy is 1st May 2014. Prices quoted are per issue and include GST.

E-News: Our e-News goes out to over 300 members For more information please contact our Newsletter each month. We can include your advertisement in or Newsletter Advertising volunteers, see opposite our e-News for $35 per issue. page for details.

38

West Auckland Parents Centre


West Auckland Parents Centre Issue 185  

Tiny Talk is West Auckland Parents Centre bi-monthly newsletter

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