Issue No. 1 by Atlas Magazine

ATLAS ISSUEÂ NO.1 JUN. 2020

STUCK AT HOME pg.08

RAISING OUR VOICES pg. 14

FACING ACADEMIC STRESS pg.10

FINDING WORTH pg.16

TOGETHER.

INTRODUCTION

. . . is an anonymous magazine, where students can safely publish their thoughts, stresses, and stories in order to get things of their chest or help other students with their own lives. . . . is a place for students of all backgrounds, achievements, and personalities to find comfort and empathy in others’ writing and advice. . . . is named after the Greek Titan who held the burden of the world on his shoulders (a feeling high schoolers are familiar with) and taught sailors how to navigate the seas with astronomy (just as our magazine helps students navigate through high school). . . . is a reminder to all students that, despite the constant whirlwind of stress and anxiety, we’re not alone. But in the end, it’s not so much as “what” is ATLAS, is as it is:

ATLAS is the therapists and counselors who are here to give advice on how to realistically tackle challenges and provide insight on the uncensored version of life. ATLAS is our board of editors who are here to spread awareness and work to make sure your voices are heard. ATLAS is

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WHO IS. . .

WHAT IS. . . ATLAS

contents. ATLAS

ISSUE No. 1

AN AUTHOR'S JOURNEY

MAKING MUSIC

ARTISTRY / EDITOR X

ARTISTY / EDITOR X

QUARANTINED ATHLETE

MENTAL MATH

OUR OCEAN'S PLASTIC

SILENCE IS BETRAYAL

ATHLETICS / EDITOR X

ACTIVISM / EDITOR Z

SELF WORTH AFFINITY / EDITOR X

BORED IN QUARANTINE EXTRAS / EDITOR X

INTRODUCTION

ACADEMIA / EDITOR X

ACTIVISM / EDITOR Z

MUSIC EXPOSURE THERAPY AFFINITY / EDITOR X

EIC'S NOTE EXTRAS / EDITOR X

SUBMISSIONS EXTRAS / ED. TEAM

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ATLAS

ISSUE No. 1

A N

ARTISTRY

A U T H O R ' S

JOURNEY T H E

S T O R Y B E H I N D W H O W R I T E S

11th grader Neha Joshi retells her personal tale as a writer, in all of its hardships, plot arcs, and her own character development. complied by Editor X

My origin story starts and ends in my second-grade classroom. Looking at me, you wouldn’t be able to guess that storytelling would ever be a passion; I was abrasive, to the point, and had a slight issue where I couldn’t exactly read. Writing was a struggle. I’m terrible at spelling (when I’m tired, I sometimes still spell “of” as “uv”), and the whole pencil-on-paper thing wasn’t doing it for me. The perfectionist in me couldn’t bear to continue a story when the words looked wrong - at that time, I thought it better to give up than to keep failing.

T H E P E R S O N T H E M

challenges to push me to write. A secondgrade teacher who saw how much I liked telling stories, who saw that I was kinda good at it. I tried doing nonfiction, I really did. I tried poetry, too - still dabble in that every now and then, but it’s not really my speed. People usually prefer my poetry. It’s more mysterious, more interpretive, than my usual storytelling. Personally, I’m into the longer pieces. It just makes me happy. I like including detail. I like getting the reader to imagine the scene, feel what I want them to feel.

BUT FICTION? FICTION IS WHERE I LIVE. There’s something about crafting a world of your own, creating characters and situations, and watching them live. You care about these nonexistent people, see them develop and grow alongside yourself. I write to get away from the real world, and there’s nothing more fascinating than fiction.

So, yeah. No one ever believed that secondgrade me would ever end up writing more than school required me to. Publishing my works? They would’ve laughed at the idea. I don’t blame them - I thought the same myself. It took someone who saw past the

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I could drone on for days about why I love writing. I love the freedom of it, the knowledge that anything could happen and I just get to watch and see. I love the sea of possibility, and I love how it’s all me. Writing is my escape. I’m not the best at expressing my emotions. Everything feels too complex and confusing, and... (next page)

ATLAS

ISSUE No. 1

ARTISTRY

...it’s hard to narrow down the root cause. So, I project on different characters and understand myself through them.

Rewrite the same (mildly traumatic - sorry to my friends) memory while listening to different songs.

Writing gives me a chance to not have to be myself. I can be anonymous. I can be famous. I can be strong, and I can be a hot mess (more than I am in real life, of course). To be sitting on my bed, slamming away on the keys, and also be a million miles away is the best feeling in the world.

The title is Talia, after the King Princess song (yes, I’m your typical gay girl). I usually associate songs with emotions, and writing with both, and writing that piece was just healing. I cried. A lot. There are physical and mental scars that got one step closer to closing up when I wrote that piece.

Writing also helps me take a break. It’s a hobby that doubles as self-expression and doubles as self-introspection. I don’t always rely on creative writing – sometimes it’s ten to twenty minutes spent journaling, getting the emotions out so I can just process. Sometimes it’s analyzing myself as if I were a character in a book. Sometimes, I don’t even write – I read, absorb the words and worlds, and let myself just be.

MY WRITING HAS DEVELOPED ALONGSIDE ME. I’ve gone from telling to showing (I hope?). My characters have gained depth as I grew to understand the complexities of mankind. Am I taking psych next year in an attempt to understand how to craft more realistic characters? Maybe. Like all creative skills, writing always carries a personal touch. Even in essays, there’s a hint of our personalities shining through. At this point, I’ve gotten control over the basics: grammar. The words I choose, the stories I craft, the dialogue to thought ratio – those are all going to change as I change. Grow as I grow. Some people may think one era of my writing is better than another, but that’s up to them to choose, not me. I’m backtracking here for a minute because although I know I said I’m not a nonfiction writer, the one piece that has stuck with me for the past six months was an emotional take on a real-life event. Every now and then, when I’m stuck in a rut or just bored, I try a different writing exercise. This one?

Sure, the world hasn’t seen it. It’s not something I ever plan on publishing. But to be quite honest, the fact that words on a paper could so much for me makes it the piece I have the most pride for. I don’t really see myself doing creative writing professionally. It used to be a dream - become an author, share the stories in my head with the world - but life caught up to me, and honestly? Turning my passion into a paycheck would take the fun out of it. It would turn into produce, produce, produce and I don’t want to ruin the magic. Maybe once I’m comfortable enough in life, I’ll try publishing for real. I’ve had dreams of publishing novels, but I think if I were to try it, I’d maybe start out with novellas or short stories. Baby steps. As for the aspiring writers out there? I know it sucks. I know you start off thinking your work is great, then hating every single word you dared to let leave your fingers. I know you look at your work and wonder why you can’t be as good as the next person. The truth is, you may not be great. Your plot lines may be lacking, and your characters may be two dimensional.

BUT YOU CAN’T LET THE FEAR OF JUDGMENT STOP YOU. PAGE 4

ATLAS

ISSUE No. 1

ARTISTRY

If you like writing, or like creating, don’t try to please other people.

WRITE FOR YOURSELF, AND LET YOURSELF BE HAPPY. A fun plus-side is the more you write, the better you get. Practice only helps. Be judgmental after you get words on the page. My biggest challenge is my own perfectionism. I’m constantly finding problems with my own work, and don’t let myself progress until it’s pristine and perfect. But that, quite honestly, is dumb.

Ninth grade me wanted to be a shape shifter. Seventh grade me wanted to be a water bender. Fifth grade me wanted to be telekinetic.

I’m scared that the words I put on paper won’t match the images I’ve created in my head. And honestly, I’m not the only one.

Second grade me wanted to be a wizard.

After a point, you have to accept that there are some things that visual arts can convey more effectively than literature. You can’t describe every movement that happens: if you did, every book would be twice as long.

And to be quite honest, I can’t be any of those things.

But on the flip side, written stories can convey thoughts in a way movies can’t. And that’s what I capitalize on, because to me, understanding a character’s personality is so much easier and captivating when you can see them through their own eyes.

BUT WITH WRITING?

The reason the stories in my head are so much better to me is that I’m getting both visuals and thoughts. So after a point, I just accept that I can’t live up to the idealized story in my head. And I learn to appreciate what I can get out, instead.

SEE, I’VE ALWAYS WISHED I HAD MAGIC. I’ve wished it from the first time I read mythology books and saw pictures of people manipulating rivers with their minds, from when I could consume media that always showed the hero as having something special.

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I CAN BE ALL OF THEM.

M ATLAS

ISSUE No. 1

ARTISTRY

AKING USIC. 12th grader Kelly Flippo details her process as a musician. More information when I know article.

compiled by Editor X

When I was six, I started learning classical piano. I was solely a classical pianist up until ninth grade. That's when I made the switch to jazz piano. And my new instructor began to teach me vocals. Before, I never really knew what I was doing when it came to singing. But having a qualified teacher finally set me on my path for successful musical training.

The classical piano was a great foundation for being able to play more creative types of music. Honestly, it helped me immensely.

starting with the piano and trying to work out a melody and chords from there. And I’ve actually written some pretty cool stuff like that.

So pro tip: If you’re going to start music or piano, first learn some traditional piano!

But it’s impossible for me to put words to those songs. It’s written only for piano, so when I try to put words to it, it doesn’t seem right.

As of right now, I’m pretty good at creating my own arrangements of pieces based off of chord sheets, lead sheets, or (sometimes) by ear. Jazz has trained my ear in a different way than it used to be when I stuck solely to classical. I’m more willing to experiment with more dissonant chords, and that's where the fun is. However, I struggle a lot with writing my own music. I’ve tried numerous methods, but none of them seem to click with me. The one I ended up resorting to was

Also, another problem I have from starting with just the piano is a lack of structure. A typical pop or jazz song has an AABA or ABAB structure. This means that there is an A section and a B section, and they repeat in the AABA form or ABAB form. In jazz and pop songs, the A sections have similar chords, and a similar melody. If it’s singing. If it’s instrumental, then the melody is all over the place (in a good way). The melody of the first A section will echo the melody of the second A section. So it's a bit tough to piece together. (next page)

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ATLAS

ISSUE No. 1

DEDICATED ARTIST But I decided to switch my method around, and it actually is much more effective. Basically, I began starting with lyrics, then trying out ways to sing them. It's only after I have the melody, I add piano. And of course, musical processes are different for everyone, but this one works well for me. Lyrics are also something I have had problems in the past. I’ve been working from a four-line formula recently. First I focus on the emotion. I introduce subject (love, loneliness, friendship, etc), then expand on that. I follow up by setting up a rhyme, then introducing a metaphor. In the end, I just complete the metaphor and the rhyme. There are a ton of these little formulas out there, and if you’re in a creative block there’s no shame in googling prompts. Honestly, composing is just a lot of effort and patience. Oh, not to mention that you have to be willing to sound stupid. Most of the time, my melodies don’t sound that great.

but that is honestly okay. And when I find one that I really like, I get to expand on that and try a ton of different variations.

ARTISTRY

And not to be cliche, but every time I write one of these, I get a bit better. Practice really does make something that resembles "perfect." At least, I slowly understand more and more of what a song is. See, there was never a nirvana moment where I instantly ‘got’ songwriting. For me, it’s just hundreds of attempts, ranging from boring to exhilarating. backed up by musical expertise from years of practice. Also, humor me as I repeat:

seriously. classical piano? learn it & succeed. Also, I’m pretty passionate about singing. Over the years, I have acquired endless songs and books that I enjoy playing out of. To me? This is genuinely enjoyable. It doesn’t feel like work. It’s just something I love to do, and I’m on the piano for fun, probably for forty minutes every other day. And I’ve been lucky- my family is also pretty musically-oriented and I’ve had the privilege of paid music lessons.

FINDING EVERYDAY

Perseverance is important. Expect to write a lot of so-so songs and phrases in the beginning. Think of them as stepping stones. I normally don’t write full songs if it’s a melody that I’m not feeling. My mini-songs are normally four lines- enough for a full musical phrase. As for the compositions themselves, I'd say light repetition is crucial. The lines of the song should echo each other, but also be unique.

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But while a music theory teachers and courses are helpful, there is not one way to compose and learn. True songwriting comes from heart and dedication. Music is my creative outlet. It brings me so much happiness. I’m so extremely grateful for the opportunities I’ve had with it. I don’t think I would be quite the same without them.

Q& A ATLAS

ISSUE No. 1

ATHLETICS

Rising senior athlete Matthew Caren discusses the impact of of the pandemic on his 2020 varsity baseball season and team. COMPILED BY EDITOR X

HOW ARE YOU PHYSICALLY

WHAT ARE YOUR FEELINGS

AND MENTALLY COPING WITH

TOWARDS THE SEASON BEING

THE LOCKDOWN?

CANCELLED?

It's definitely been a challenge, especially

It sucks. It really does. All year I'm looking

since it's so important for me to keep a

forward to the season, counting down the

routine to stay in shape. I'm keeping to a

months, and then it ended before we could

workout and training schedule best that I

even really get started. Especially for the

can, but that's also been tough because I

graduating seniors, to not be able to play

can't get out to the gym or the field.

out

their

last

high

school

season

really

sucks.

WHAT’S BEEN THE BIGGEST

WHAT’S SOME ADVICE YOU’D

CHALLENGE FOR YOU AS AN

RECOMMEND OTHER ATHLETES

ATHLETE BEING COOPED UP?

STUCK IN QUARANTINE?

The biggest challenge is just staying in top

Just try and keep on going the best you can.

shape when everything's closed. It's tricky

You can't change the situation, so make of

when

are

it what you can. I've found that keeping a

impossible now. It's not all a bad thing

routine really helps, and overall just knowing

though—interrupting all my workout habits

that life hasn't stopped just because your

has driven me to explore new routines that

season has.

all

your

normal

routines

I'd have never considered otherwise.

HOW IS THE TEAM AS A WHOLE AFFECTED BY THE DISTANCE? We're still up to all our usual crazy shit, but it's all digital now. Honestly, just being on the field with the boys is one of the things I

VIEW HIS DAILY QUARANTINE WORKOUT ON THE

miss most.

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WORKOUT WORKOUT ATLAS

ISSUE No. 1

ATHLETICS

WARM UP: 3 mile run In order to avoid contact with other people, you can just use your street and run along, back and forth. Use an app like Runkeeper in order to track your distance.

https://www.asics.com/us/enus/mk/runkeeper

PART ONE REPS

EXERCISE SEQUENCEÂ

3 squat jumps

3 single leg squat jumps (per leg)

3 triple squat jumps

3 single leg triple squat jumps

10 lunge jumps

50m sprint

50m sprint, start in

PART TWO (repeat 4x) 25 push ups

50 Russian twists

50 sit ups

1 minute plank

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y m all e B c i r E y B o t o h P : t i d e r C

perpendicular lunge

ATLAS

ISSUE No. 1

Mental

11th grader Kari Miller recounts her experience with the stress of balancing math work and the elements of her life. compiled by Editor X

ACADEMICS

Math.

Up until seventh grade, I genuinely enjoyed school. I appreciated the opportunity to learn, and it hadn't been a big stressor in my life. I find doing mindless calculations and trig proofs incredibly fun. It’s very satisfying when the numbers work out and it makes me kind of excited. In school, everything was going great. I was in all my advanced middle school classes and thriving. Basic algebra was relatively easy, and my teachers were teaching me the material.

But when the learning environment becomes a hostile one, the enjoyability takes a big hit.

Bob Peterson/Time Life Pictures, via Getty Images

In seventh grade, when I took accelerated pre-algebra, everything started to derail. My teacher, rather than teach us the material in a way we could all understand, would explain it once. Then she'd make us feel stupid if we had any questions. So nobody asked questions. She essentially scared all of us into learning the material on our own.

I was

It was pre-algebra, so it wasn't that hard - I passed with 96%. I was miserable, but at least my grades weren’t suffering. Next year would be better, right? I’d have a different teacher who would be able to answer all my questions and not make me feel stupid for not knowing everything, right?

but at least

Wrong.

miserable my grades weren't suffering. Next year would be better, right?

Eighth grade honors Algebra 1 was worse. This teacher didn't even pretend to care. Her mindset was that “You guys are honors students; you already know everything.” Sure - that was true for some students: the students who took outside math classes or had after-school tutors. I had never been tutored. My education had been in school, and that's it. My white mother would never have dreamed of sending me to an outside facility. That’s the teacher’s job, isn't it? But for the first time in my short school career, I was getting a B in a class. Unheard of. So I finally gave in and got a tutor. That helped for the year, and I ended up passing the class just fine. Then came high school. With high school came the increased workload - a significant factor in the change of my mindset [about math]. (next page)

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ATLAS

ISSUE No. 1

ACADEMICS

In freshman year, honors geometry was fine. It wasn't math that I necessarily understood, so I was fine with not doing particularly well. I passed and stayed in the honors track - that's all that mattered.

However, when I finally got to honors algebra two, my entire mental state began to deteriorate. The teacher was absolutely lovely, but she didn't seem too concerned with the impact that the workload was having on me. I was in multiple extracurricular activities which imposed on my homework and studying time, but I was still able to get everything done. But this was where the ‘panic mistakes’ began. My testtaking abilities began to worsen during this time. I started to make silly mistakes that had nothing to do with ‘knowing the concepts.' It was simply adding or multiplying mistakes. And these started to severely tank my scores. A number of my peers began to have similar problems and decided to drop the honors program the next year. I planned on doing the same. However, my mother had other ideas. She wouldn't let me drop the program,

which added another layer of stress to my life. Math has always been something my mom emphasized in my education. She believed it helped develop problemsolving skills that would be useful, no matter where I went in life. And I totally understand the importance of math in developing critical thinking abilities. However, as someone who plans on majoring in English, I don't feel the need to learn these skills at an honors level. And it's always been something my mom and I fight over because I didn't always understand the way she did it - and she hated that I counted on my fingers. In a way, it has always been a stressor of sorts. But in elementary and middle school, it didn't really matter to me what she thought. Also, my parents didn't seem to understand that I was struggling because I had previously been so good at math. They just thought I wasn't putting in the effort. And I'm a bit of a perfectionist in some ways, so the stress was partially my own doing. But then teachers would give copious amounts of homework.

Balancing the workload with my extracurriculars began to break me down. One particular day, I remember I had been struggling for a while in the class and were on a pretty confusing chapter.

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I already was feeling really

stressed out and overwhelmed. We had a test that day, and I had been studying at lunch but I couldn’t seem to grasp the concepts. I had just been in some really big fights with my parents over math placement, and I was already feeling really stressed out and overwhelmed. I don't have an anxiety disorder, but this is the closest thing I could ever imagine to a panic attack and it was terrifying. I sat in the bathroom shaking and crying. I eventually went to the counselors' office where the therapist was on lunch break. So I essentially just sat in the dark until I had calmed down. I ended up missing the test, and took it the next day. I didn't do great, but I’m sure I did better than I would have if I had taken it the previous day. (next page)

ATLAS

ISSUE No. 1 Certain staff members and peers are very considerate. One year, my teacher, starting at the semester, cut our homework load basically in half. And that was incredibly helpful. However, I know that this is often unrealistic because much of education is repetition based. I hope teachers can maximize productivity in the classroom. Students should be able to learn in the classroom and begin practicing the skills taught. Homework should be only to solidify and further skills learned in the classroom, not to finish what was left unlearned in class. But the stress? It’s a part of high school. Learning to deal with stressful situations is an important skill because the real world is a brutal place.

It’s best we learn it now than have a rude awakening when we have no support. Because in highschool, even if it doesn't regularly seem apparent, there is always a support system. My friends have always been there to talk me out of my stress. They reassure me that things will work out and that even if it’s bad now, it’s not the end of the world. Teachers have noticed me ‘looking down’ in class and sent me wonderfully nice emails, making sure I know that they are there for me and that I am okay. There are some teachers whom I feel comfortable talking directly to. They have all been an essential part of my mental well-being during high school.

ACADEMICS As for my personal coping mechanisms:

I've found that taking a breather for at least 10 minutes during the day is really helpful. I could be meditating, praying, or even just lying on the floor of my room. As long as I am not doing anything school or work-related during this break, I have a lot more clarity and am more relaxed when I am finished. Study-wise, writing things down is effective. Even if I have the option to type up a study guide, making a visual organizer helps me to solidify concepts and memorize where they are in my study guide. That aids me during tests whenever I can recall that information. In the end, I think struggling through this time has made me a better person. I know that can't be said for everyone.

But in this case, I think I'm better for it. Giving myself any unrealistic standards to live up to is a terrible idea, obviously. But I've come to realize that that's real life. People are going to expect things, and I can't always deliver. Again, it’s good to learn that lesson sooner rather than later.

The world isn't perfect. It's full of stressful situations. But we can make it a safer environment for people to try and fail in the name of ‘becoming a better person.' ☺

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ocean PLASTIC

ATLAS

ISSUE No. 1

ACTIVISM

IS THERE A CERTAIN EXPERIENCE THAT INSPIRED YOU TO START BECOMING AN ACTIVIST FOR FIXING THE PROBLEM OF OCEAN PLASTIC?

There was no specific experience that inspired me. As I got older, I just slowly started to realize how horrible we were treating the Earth. Not just with plastic - but with deforestation, air pollution, and overpopulation just to name a few. Each person is obviously limited on what they can do, but plastic is a great place to start. It’s hard to control major companies and their factories, but you can control your use of plastic. And every little bit helps.

WHAT IS THE MAIN PROBLEM WITH OCEAN PLASTIC THAT WE ARE DEALING WITH TODAY? Over eight million tons of plastic pollute the ocean every year, and that number is expected to grow exponentially. Single use plastics are detrimental to both the environment and economy. Millions of dollars are wasted annually to clean up plastic waste, and this could be avoided if people stopped using plastic in the first place. Aside from the financial toll, plastic waste also takes an environmental toll. Turtles and whales which were once able to roam freely are now trapped and put in harm’s way while merely searching for food. Animals are dying because humans are too careless to solve the plastic problems arising. With numerous species going extinct, entire ecosystems are collapsing, and this all cycles back to humans.

DO YOU THINK WE ARE DOING ENOUGH TO SOLVE THIS PROBLEM? We are most definitely NOT. Every little bit helps, but how severe the issue is, major change needs to take place in order to restore the planet. Restraining from using plastic cups and bags is only buying time. Large corporations such as Coca Cola, Pepsico and Nestle, which are largely responsible for plastic waste, need to do their part. With that being said, continue to individually take steps in order to help solve the issue. Raise awareness, educate yourself and others on the topic, and obviously, do your part to stop using plastic.

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WHAT ARE SOME BIG CHANGES THAT YOU THINK SHOULD BE MADE TO HELP BETTER DEAL WITH THIS PROBLEM? There needs to be change on the global level. Some countries are taking action. However, the US' federal government has no laws regulating the production or use of plastic. Instead, it's left up to states and their cities to make these decisions for themselves. The government needs to step up and protect their citizens. And as I mentioned before, major corporations also need to step up. Billionaires who have the money to spare could make an enormous difference.

WHAT IS SOMETHING PEOPLE CAN IMPLEMENT INTO THEIR DAY TO DAY LIVES TO HELP FIX THIS PROBLEM?

Stop using plastic. I know this is easier said than done. Plastic is in practically everything and it is inevitable that you will use it, but still try to limit your plastic use. Invest in alternatives. Everyday items such as plastic bags, toothbrushes, razors, water bottles, and containers all have reusable or biodegradable alternatives. Although they are initially more expensive, in the long run they pay off. Educate yourself. Don’t support companies that are largely responsible for plastic waste. Find out which products in your daily routines contain single use plastics, and find alternatives.

WHAT HOPES DO YOU HAVE FOR THE FUTURE OF THE OCEAN ENVIRONMENT?

I hope that the human race will step up. Even with such an extreme issue, there are still solutions. Drastic measures must be taken, but I do believe that they will happen. I just hope that they will happen before it is too late. Rae Bear is an 12th grade student, with the passionate mind of a rising activist. Ocean pollution is a topic she strongly stands against. For further information about how to prevent and reduce ocean waste, read: https://www.nrdc.org/stories/10-ways-reduce-plastic-pollution

ATLAS

ISSUE No. 1

ACTIVISM

12th grade student Melika Morshed sheds an in-depth perspective into the Black Lives Matter movement, the current protests, riots, and voices that are spreading over the nation.

Black lives matter. A simple phrase that we have all heard a lot recently, but many people don’t seem to truly understand below the surface level. Every time someone chants the phrase ‘“Black Lives Matter,'' many people seem to take offense to that. Suddenly, they want to talk about how “All Lives Matter.” But, it’s important to understand that the phrase “Black Lives Matter” doesn't imply that all lives don’t matter. It instead focuses on trying to support a community that has suffered relentless discrimination in America: the Black community. Think of it this way. After the 2013 Boston Marathon Bombings, the slogan “Boston Strong” was emblazoned around the country, in solemn memorial for the tragedy. Imagine someone countering the slogan by saying, “well, all cities are strong!” That’s how insensitive “All Lives Matter” sounds. And as of right now, all lives don’t actually matter, most lives do because society has been behaving as if Black lives don’t. The idea that “All lives matter” is not only unnecessary and illadvised, but it's actually doing more harm than good to the Black Lives Matter movement. By turning the focus of the BLM movement onto everyone, the attention is being taken away from what’s important: the fact that innocent Black lives are being lost time and time again at the hands of those that are supposed to be protecting them - the police. Instead of trying to silence the people advocating for BLM by trying to add all lives into the mix, it’s important to come together and demand justice for the Black community because all lives truly cannot matter until Black lives do.

A big discussion that comes to mind when talking about the BLM movement is the rioting. In a utopian society, we would never need violence in order to get a point across. But, if we look at this topic historically, we can see that a significant number of rights in the U.S. were the result of the riots and protests that have been done in their name. Personally, I’m against violence. I believe that we should try to avoid it at all costs. But I understand why it is happening. In 2016, NFL players began peacefully protesting by kneeling during the national anthem, in support of BLM and in opposition to police brutality. Not only did they receive a ton of backlash - their peaceful actions also resulted in little to no change. A notable person mentioned in regards to the current state of violence is Martin Luther King. People incorporate him into their arguments, referencing how he was able to accomplish so much without using any violent tactics. However, in his past speeches, MLK had actually spoken out about how he understood rioting and why it happens. In one of his interviews, he said, “A riot is the language of the unheard. And what is it America has failed to hear? … It has failed to hear that the promises of freedom and justice have not been met.” No one is truly a fan of the physical action that takes place in riots, but it can be understood that sometimes, as a last resort, some physical action needs to be used in order to get a point across.

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ISSUE No. 1

ACTIVISM

Malcolm X, another human rights activist once stated, “concerning non-violence: it is criminal to teach a man not to defend himself when he is the constant victim of brutal attacks.” Again, in no way, shape, or form do I, or most others, believe that violence should be the first method used to get a point across. Not even the second. But after being ignored and silenced for centuries, Black folk and their allies are sick and tired of watching Black people get killed at the hands of those that are supposed to be protecting them. Even though nobody necessarily welcomes the riots, it is clear that the Black community has been essentially ignored in all of the numerous peaceful protests they have done. As Malcolm X put it: "If violence is wrong in America, violence is wrong abroad. If it is wrong to be violent defending Black women and Black children and Black babies and Black men, then it is wrong for America to draft us and make us violent abroad in defense of her. And if it is right for America to draft us, and teach us how to be violent in defense of her, then it is right or you and me to do whatever is necessary to defend our own people right here in this country." Additionally, police brutality towards Black people is not new. It has only recently gained more traction because people have started to film and share the injustices at an increasing rate. Choosing to close your eyes and ignore what’s going on in our country right now does not make it go away. Dozens of videos have surfaced in the past week, showing groups of protesters (all of whom were standing peacefully, with posters held up and no signs of aggression) scattering as tear gas and rubber bullets cut through the air between them. During the recent protests taking place, police cars have been shown driving into crowds of people, with no warning. They would tell people to put their hands up and right when they did the Police would then lift up people's masks in order to spray them with pepper spray. This was all while the Police had taken off their own badges and had covered up their ID numbers so that they could not be identified later on -- which is illegal.

#BLACKLIVESMATTER

This, in itself, is the reason people say ACAB (all cops are bastards). The word bastard here comes from the word “bastardize” which means to corrupt. It talks about how anyone who works for the system is automatically corrupt because they are working for a corrupt system (watch 13th on Netflix for a deeper understanding of this statement), not that the individual morality of every cop is corrupt. It is also important, of course, to recognize that there are some cops in the system who are genuinely trying to help fight crime the right way. However, all these cops, no matter their intentions, are taking part in a broader system that benefits from the institutional racism inside it. At the very core of the police and criminal justice department, there is a system of racism. And nothing is going to change if we don’t band together to force the change and demand justice. It all starts with you. Donate money, go to protests, sign the petitions, vote if you’re of age, and spread awareness because all lives truly cannot matter until Black lives do. This has gone on far too long. We simply can not go back to normal. As of June 7th, Minneapolis -- the city where George Floyd was murdered -- has opted to dismantle their police force. Minneapolis City Council President Lisa Bender has stated that “efforts at incremental reform have failed.” This dismantling of existing structures is what needs to continue to take place.

PAG PAGE 15

LEARN MORE AT HTTPS://BLACKLIVESMATTER.COM/

#BLM RESOURCES ACTIVISM

EDUCATE

https://education.uconn.edu/anti-racismresources-for-students-educators-andcitizens/# UConn has created a compilation of resources (articles, movies, documentaries, website, etc.) for anyone and everyone to educate themselves on racism and the black lives movement.

https://www.amnestyusa.org/protests/

PROTEST SUPPORT DONATE & SIGN CONTACT

Learn about your rights as a protester, preparation tips, and what to do if you encounter teargass/pepper spray/police violence.

https://apps.apple.com/us/app/policescanner-radio-fire/id498405045 apps like Police Scanner allows citizens to monitor police activity. Alert local protesters about incoming police forces.

https://www.forbes.com/sites/elisabethbrier/ 2020/06/05/75-black-owned-businesses-tosupport/#7920881b3814 Support Black-Owned businesses, even from your own home. With lock-down in place, reference this list of black-owned businesses from which you can order products online and show your support.

https://www.rollingstone.com/culture/cultur e-news/george-floyd-protests-bail-fundspolice-brutality-black-lives-matter-1008259/ an extensive list of bail funds and organizations based on state and districts within the US. Donate now!

https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co/#petitions a whole set of different petitions for you to sign, all in one place. Try and sign them all within one sitting and do your part in the movement!

https://sites.google.com/view/speakupblm/h ome/contact-for-justice?authuser=0 a student-compiled list of contact information and emails/phone calls templates for your use towards local governments, in support of the protests and the BLM

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ATLAS

ISSUE No. 1

AFFINITY

S SELF WORTH. E L F L O V E .

What is self-love? I don’t think that there is an exact definition for the term “self-love." It holds a slightly different meaning for everyone. Personally, I believe that self-love is achieved when you learn to really find beauty in yourself and all that you do. This not only means that you love yourself when you’re at your best but, arguably even more importantly, when you’re at your worst.

Are self-love and narcissism the same?

Is self-love easy to obtain?

In this Q&A, 11th grader Melika Morshed discusses a personal journey in self-worth and discusses the importance of putting yourself first. recorded and edited by editor X.

PAGE 17

Definitely not. Self-love takes a lot of time to obtain, especially because of the way our society is structured. Growing up, there have always been certain body images portrayed to us under the word “beautiful”. So whenever someone thinks of “beautiful,” a certain celebrity pops up in their mind. Women see a size 2 and men see a man with a 6-pack. But in actuality, beauty is everywhere. In every person. I think that if society wasn’t so close-minded in the images that they portray to people at such a young age, it wouldn’t be as hard as it is to obtain self love. And that’s clearly a hard thing to change. But even though society doesn’t make it any easier to learn to love yourself, it’s still not an impossible task.

Not at all. I feel like lots of people mistake these two things for one another because there is a pretty fine line between them. But To sum it up the best way I know how: Self-love means having a high regard for your own happiness and well-being and knowing the difference between being selfless at times and sacrificing your wellbeing to please others. Self-love means not settling for less than you deserve. Narcissism, on the other hand, is believing that your beauty outshines others. There is nothing wrong with confidence in your mental and physical looks, but the second that you start believing you’re better than others because of how pretty you are or how kind you may be, that starts to become narcissism.

How does our view of ourselves affect our lives? Our views on ourselves are everything. I know that sounds like an exaggeration at first but really think about it. How many times has your idea of yourself, whether it be the way you look or your overall confidence, stopped you from doing something you wanted to do? Or even forced you to do something you didn’t necessarily want to do? When we don’t have confidence in ourselves, we tend to seek validation through others. We base our own opinion on... (next page)

iSSUE No. 1

AFFINITY

... ourselves through what other people think of us. The day that you realize your beauty, both physically and mentally, for yourself is the day that the world truly becomes your oyster.

What stops people from loving themselves?

photo cred: @thefemalewarhol

Have you always had self-love? Definitely not! In fact, I used to be one of the most insecure and self-loathing people that I knew. I would constantly find ways to bring myself down whether it was through comparison, negative self-talk, or even bashing myself with harmful “jokes.” I’ve always surrounded myself with good people who want the best for me, but no matter how many times they would compliment me on my physical appearance or personality traits, I wouldn’t believe anything they said, even though I knew they were being genuine. I only really started to believe the kind things said to me when I started to say them to myself.

What was your self-love journey like? If I’m being completely honest, I think the first 16 ½ years of my life would've been completely different if I had more self-love from the start. But, I also don’t think I would’ve learned to appreciate myself the way I do now. Self-love is a long journey and though I’m not 100% there yet, I’ve learned so much about myself these past 6 months and I’ve really learned how important it is to love myself with the same passion and energy that I love others with. Even though I’m sure that my life would’ve been a lot easier and happier if I had just loved myself from the beginning, I wouldn’t change a thing if I could.

SELF LOVE SELF WORTH SE

ATLAS

Comparing themselves to others. The reason that social media apps can be so toxic is because it forces these societal beauty standards on us and makes us believe that we must look a certain way in order to truly be beautiful. But it's because we all look so different - that's what makes us so beautiful. Take Madison Beer for example beautiful human being and an even more amazing person. But, if we ALL looked like her, there would be no beauty in her look. Everyone is so beautiful in their own way, but society’s beauty standards stops us from believing so.

photo cred: @thefemalewarhol

What exactly did you do to help change your perspective? I would actually argue that the way you talk to yourself is the most important step to obtaining self-love. I also took a break from social media and started implementing positive affirmations into my daily routine. And in the end, I truly believe that everything happens for a reason and I know that if I had experienced anything differently from the way I have, I wouldn’t be the person I am today.

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ATLAS

ISSUE No. 1

What do you do daily to remind yourself of your self-worth? My favorite way to remind myself of my self-worth is through using positive affirmations. Every morning, when I first get up, I like to look at myself in the mirror for 5 minutes and just point out the things that I like about my physical appearance and my personality. Then, I’ll compliment a few things that I’m not so happy about with myself and as the days go by, I tend to see the change in my mindset about the things I used to not like so much. Eventually, I start to really believe the compliments I give myself and it allows me to not only remind myself of my self-worth but to grow in terms of self-love every day!

What can we physically do? My advice would be to pick an activity that you love to do, something that makes you happy. Work on that. Having a hobby gives your life purpose. It comes with new obstacles for you to push through and learn from. You'll feel accomplished in things, knowing that you’re constantly pushing your own boundaries will allow you to form more respect for yourself. My personal hobby is acting and art because they are two things that make me very happy. Find things that make you feel good!

AFFINITY

What mentality can we adopt to accept and gain self-worth? In order to obtain self-love I think the one thing that you have to completely let go of is comparison. It’s so hard to love and accept yourself when you’re constantly looking at all these beautiful men and women online and pointing out the flaws in yourself that you don’t see in them. In order to really love yourself you need to realize that you are your own person both mentally and physically. You need to be patient with your growth and realize that nothing is going to happen overnight.

How can people overcome mental barriers when it comes to gaining selflove? Something that really helped me understand how I should be loving myself is by looking at how kindly I treat my friends and the people around me. I realized that I deserve the same love and respect that I give the people I love. I think the same thing goes for forgiveness. Because we’re all our own biggest critics, we tend to be harder on ourselves than we are on anyone else. Just think about it this way: would you hold the people you love accountable to the same standard you’re holding yourself to right now? Would you make them feel as guilty as you’re forcing yourself to feel for a simple mistake? We’re all human and as humans we are constantly making mistakes and learning from them. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with setting goals and challenging yourself but there is a big difference between that and being absolutely brutal to yourself when you mess up. Take a step back and realize that you are always learning. You can’t expect perfection from yourself. I think another important thing to realize during the journey of self-love is that it’s okay to have setbacks. In fact, I would actually argue that it’s quite normal. Setbacks are a part of every growth journey.

Simply put, your opinion on yourself, both mentally and physically, is the only one that matters. PAGE 19

ATLAS

ISSUE No. 1

10th grader Soph Fleming rants about their mission to take back something once stolen from them, and recounts their experience with exposure therapy for something untraditionally scary. compiled by Editor X

AFFINITY

M U S I C A L

T H E R A P Y

Earlier this morning, I was stuck on the topic of music. More specifically, the feelings people get when listening to particular songs. It's always fascinated me and, while I'm sure I'm dramatizing this so much more than it needs to be, it's almost like real-life wizardry. It's like, your brain hears this assortment of notes (like a spell), and there's a change/alteration: Emotional, mental, whatever. It's like you're entranced, right?

* S O R C E R Y *

Like, for example, I was making new Spotify playlists for myself today out of pure boredom (it's kind of fun, though). I stumbled across a song that I hadn't heard in a while, And instantly, I got this aching feeling right in my rib cage. You know, the nostalgic aching when you're momentarily part of the memory associated with a song.

I remember the exact day I heard this song. It was sophomore year. One of my former close friends/ex-boyfriend and I used to send each other song recommendations all the time. We both had (and still have) very different opinions on music. We share a couple of favorite bands, but for the most part, we're on opposite sides of the music spectrum. I'll give him credit, he was pretty lenient when it came to songs and would like (or pretend to like) the music recommendations I gave

AVOIDED

THAT

STUPID

him. But it was rare, and I mean rare, for us to find a song of his that I genuinely enjoyed. Anyway, a couple of weeks after we broke up, he shared this specific song with me.

Long story short: I genuinely loved the song, up until he decided to explain that he interpreted it as a perfect description of his endeavors with his new girlfriend. ALBUM

THE

PLAGUE.

PAGE 20

ATLAS

THIS

ISSUE No. 1

WHERE

I was angry because I just wanted to enjoy that song, even by myself. Without having to associate it with the feeling of replacement and sadness, you know? But I couldn't because while I'd still get that warm feeling in my chest from listening to any good song, it'd just feel lonely, forlorn, and bittersweet. And I didn't want the "bitter." So that's the blessing and curse of music.

I'm going to enjoy this song. I'd finally moved on from all the wishy-washy, weird dynamics of that break-up situation months ago, thinking it's best to just surrender everything. But I decided to give myself a little victory today. I'm was going to take back this song for myself, no matter the cost. SO

MYSELF

BASICALLY INTO

THERAPY

FORCED

EXPOSURE

FOR

MUSIC.

I turned on the song and re-listened to it, volume at 8/10. Played it 5 times in a row. And, being completely honest here, I cried the first time. Not like sobbing. Just like an instinctive "why the hell am I doing this" type of cry (admittedly a very often occurrence in my life). And in summary? I think it worked. It didn't get rid of the emotions completely. I don't really think it ever will cause sad emotions and music are STUBBORN as hell. But I guess it just kinda got buried away by my pure enjoyment of the song.

TL;DR

SONGS,

AND

PAGE 21

MUSIC

ARE

with

the

intention

better

associations

onto

the

song.

Almost like a band-aid, but went deeper than surface level. Because I was genuinely appreciating the moments I was in while listening to them, to a more emotional level. Like, endorphin-producing levels. And I'm no scientist, but it'd make sense for people to mentally disassociate bad connotations from things. And then with some effort, attach better ones onto things they love, right? Because it seemed to start working for me. Honestly, I personally think this is a method that runs with a lot of things, not just music. But with past activities you once did. Or with certain places. Of course, sometimes there's something kinda nice (for lack of a better word, at the moment) about having some songs kept as memorabilia to something sad. Like how we listen to Lewis Capaldi when we're sad to make us cry more because it feels wonderfully relieving. But it was nice discovering that it doesn't always have to stay that way. That there is a way to take your shit back. I was feeling bold and decided to tackle our shared playlist together, so whenever I listen to these songs, there's always gonna be a little twinge of sadness. But I'm in control of it now, and I know how to sing away all the bad feelings. And that, ladies and gentlemen, feels frickin' amazing.

YOU

CAN'T

THERAPY,

GOING

GOOD

Basically, I spent the next four replays forcing my family to dance with me or jumping on my couch with my PJs and a messy ponytail. Each replay was me doing some new random thing that made me happy,

REASON

EXPOSURE

FAMILY

GETS

slapping

But TODAY. Something changed. I decided, screw it. SCREW IT.

AND

AFFINITY

ENJOY

TISSUES,

YOUR

BEST

SOME

GOOD

ENDORPHINS,

FRIENDS.

bored during quarantine? EXTRAS

ACTIVITIESÂ 16

PERSONALITIES

TEST

https://www.16personalities.com/ i took this test and was a little terrified at how accurate it describe my habits, mindset, etc. definitely not your average Buzzfeed personality

MOVIES ARRIVAL

sci-fi/thriller - 94% rotten tomatoes The film follows a linguist enlisted by the United States Army to discover how to communicate with extraterrestrial aliens who have arrived on Earth, before tensions lead to war.

quiz.

EXPLODING

KITTENS

APP

https://explodingkittens.com/mobile-app this game is the most perfectly weird game concept. lots of cats, dynamite, and sabotage. i play the card version with my family at home, but the app version is great for right now.

THE

BIG

SICK

romantic comedy - 98% rotten tomatoes "Pakistan-born comedian Kumail Nanjiani and grad student Emily Gardner fall in love but struggle as their cultures clash. When Emily contracts a mysterious illness, Kumail finds himself forced to face her feisty parents, his family's expectations, and his true feelings."

BOOKS SAPIENS: OF

BRIEF

HISTORY

HUMANKIND

by Yuval Noah Harari

PLAYLIST MAGIC

i have the attention span of a 5 year old child on

crack in a playground. very short. but for some

Wallows

reason i could not put this book down. something about learning how our self-decimating, nihilistic generation came to be was just fascinating. a great read, especially for a nonfiction book.

THE

HAMPTONS

Social House, Lil Yachty

HOLD

GIRL

George Ezra SOMEONE

YOU

BANNERS RED

RISING

TRILOGY

byÂ Pierce Brown this game is the most perfectly weird game

TEENAGE

DIRTBAG

Wheatus

concept. lots of cats, dynamite, and sabotage. i

GREEN

play the card version with my family at home, but

Cavetown

the app version is great for right now.

PAGE 22

from the editor in chief I thought of ATLAS on a Tuesday night, after spending the whole day consulting with academicallyadvanced classmates - all of whom were confidently discussing their perfect grades, future college major, careers, and retirement plans. And as a student with multiple Cs and no idea what I’m even going to major in in college, I ultimately wallowed in a feeling of isolation during school hours as I felt like the only one who was fastened to this overwhelming uncertainty. Everyone seemed to know exactly what they were doing with their life, and it was naturally intimidating. When I decided to take a break, I turned to some close friends for comfort. But before I could even begin to vent about my feelings, I was met with the same complaints running through my own mind as they ranted to me: “Why does everyone seem to be so put together, while I’m such a mess?” “Is everyone just perfect students here? Or am I just exceptionally dumb?” “I feel like I’m the only one failing, and honestly, I can’t handle the pressure.” To my surprise, the people confiding in me about these insecurities happen to be some of the people who to be the most secure people at our school. In high school, especially rigorous and competitive schools students are accustomed to putting on a facade of confidence. There’s a stigma to those who express uncertainty in their futures or the present - it’s an unspoken expectation of the students to show off their security in the educational/career pathways. Many students, especially me, have trouble keeping this mask up. It's tiresome, always being told that your truth sucks and should be covered up. And in many cases, there is no safe place to turn to. Friends are occupied with their own matters. Parents are the ones holding unrealistic expectations over our heads. Counselors are helpful, but it’s hard to admit personal feelings to admin. Students shouldn't conceal their frustrations. But society doesn't necessarily allow them to let them out, for the fear that they reveal that they’re not the perfect students they seem to be. And that’s where the idea of ATLAS was born. I wanted to create a place where students were able to put on the mask of anonymity in order to express their worries. ATLAS was made to give the student an escape and place of release, while also letting readers know that they're not alone. Or perhaps give advice to other students, guiding them through the chaos of high school. All while ensure they can feel secure knowing their mask isn't tampered with. So as this magazine's EIC, I truly hope that ATLAS provides the support that you might need or at least some entertainment for the time being. And if there is anything we can do to improve and make you feel safe, don't be afraid to let us know.

we're in this together. - EIC

PAGE 23

SUBMIT YOUR STORY contact us directly at:

theatlaspublications@gmail.com if you wish to remain anonymous with us, fill out this google form for further instruction: shorturl.at/hpTW8

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