Tuesday, May 18, 2010
The Vicksburg Post
White-collar woman keeps blue-collar beau secret DEAR ABBY ABIGAIL
Dear It’s Complicated: There doesn’t appear to be anything wrong with the relationship. It has worked for seven years. What’s “wrong” may be that you’re afraid you have “settled” for someone who isn’t up to the standards of those in your professional circle. If you are happy, why do you feel you must live up to someone else’s standards? Of course, this doesn’t have to be a deal breaker. If you and Burt are a happy couple, keep your personal and professional lives separate. Many couples do. Dear Abby: I am a young, single mother of two girls. I work full time and I’m involved in my daughters’ lives. I go
BY BERNICE BEDE OSOL • NEWSPAPER ENTERPRISE ASSOCIATION If tomorrow is your birthday: Many opportunities will come your way in the year ahead, but whether or not you will take advantage of any of them will be up to you. Taurus (April 20-May 20) — Unless you are diligent regarding how you spend your money, you are likely to get careless and start incurring big bills on unnecessary items. Gemini (May 21-June 20) — Being attracted to items of novel artistic expression might cause you to focus on goals that are full of empty promises. Be particularly careful at work. Cancer (June 21-July 22) — Be on guard should an associate who has barely noticed you in the past suddenly take an interest in you. Chances are s/he has an ulterior motive that might cost you something. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22) — Take care when involved in a collective endeavor, so that not one person is permitted to use the joint effort to his/her sole advantage. Someone among you might be a manipulator trying to do just that. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — It’s good to set big goals for yourself, but failure is likely to result if even one is more than you can handle. Be realistic. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) — You’ll fare far better if you focus only on your own efforts, and not on how much others are doing. Unless you’re the boss, the industriousness of co-workers should be of no concern to you. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) — When it comes to your financial affairs, there is a good chance you could be a bit of a dreamer today. You might be somewhat inclined to believe what you want rather than in cold, hard facts. Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) — Your optimistic spirit is wonderful, but because this could make you somewhat gullible, it might not be one of your better days to go shopping for a bigticket item. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — A serious issue about which you might be a bit too complacent could drift off in the wrong direction today. Should it bog down, you’ll have a difficult time getting it unstuck. Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) — Owing to the mishandling of your funds, this could be another one of those days when you find yourself broke and unable to join in fun and games with others. Eventually you’ll learn. Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20) — If you let your guard down in handling a situation that requires both tact and compassion, you could end up making a poor impression on the very people you’re trying to impress. Aries (March 21-April 19) — In seeking a bit of excitement, you might go overboard with flirting. You could create problems by turning your charms on someone who takes it seriously.
TWEEN 12 & 20
BY DR. ROBERT WALLACE • NEWSPAPER ENTERPRISE ASSOCIATION Dr. Wallace: I am 16 and the youngest of five children. All the others have left home and are out on their own. My parents are usually very strict, so I was very surprised when they allowed me to go out with Phil. They met him and liked him. Phil and I had a wonderful time together until his parents moved 200 miles away. Phil didn’t want to break up, so we decided to retain our relationship. About two weeks ago, a real cute and nice boy at church asked me to go out with him. I really wanted to, but I told him no because I was loyal to Phil, and even though he lived far away, I was going to honor our commitment to each other. I like Phil and would still be dating him if he lived in town, but I also would like to go out with boys from here. Would it be proper for me to send Phil a “Dear John” letter? — Nameless, Santa Fe, N.M. Nameless: If I remember correctly (I received several while serving in the Navy), a “Dear John” letter is a final “Goodbye, it’s been good to know you” sort of thing. Don’t send one to Phil. Instead, tell him it would be best if you both dated others since you won’t be seeing one another regularly. Make him aware that you still care for him and would enjoy corresponding with him regularly. Tell him that you are looking forward to dating others and encourage him to do the same. Dr. Wallace: I am a first-year student at the University of California at Irvine and am surprised at the number of students who are from a foreign country. I’m not saying this is bad; I’m just wondering why. I just hope they are not denying American students the privilege of attending college or university. — Sara, Newport Beach, Calif. Sara: There are about 250,000 foreign students studying in the United States, according to the U.S. State Department. Their presence is a boon to everyone’s education and in no way deprives American students of a chance to go to college. • Dr. Robert Wallace writes for Copley News Service. E-mail him at rwallace@Copley News Service.
to all their school functions, coach their soccer team, serve as the Cookie Mom for Girl Scouts and volunteer for anything else I can manage to squeeze into my schedule, but I have a hard time making friends with any other moms. None of the other mothers wants to get to know me. I wait at the bus stop with my girls and the moms talk to each other, but not to me. I get a weird “vibe” from them, as if they think I’m too young to know anything. I try to join in, but it seems they really don’t care for me. I have friends my age, but they don’t have children. I want friends who have families because they face the same kind of issues I do. What can I do to make these moms like me? — Friend-Challenged in Cypress, Texas Dear Friend-Challenged: There is no way to “make” someone like you, and if a clique has already been established, it can be difficult to break in.
It is possible that because of your youth and single status you are perceived as a threat to them — but I do have a suggestion, and your youth can be an advantage. Start asking them for advice, and it’s possible they may take you under their collective wing. Dear Abby: What is the proper way to kiss after the wedding officiant says, “You may now kiss the bride”? Should the couple share a simple kiss, or can it be a little more intense? — Danielle in Tampa Dear Danielle: The wedding is a time to demonstrate eternal commitment, not unbridled passion. The kiss can be as intense as you like, as long as it doesn’t last more than six seconds, and doesn’t remove the bride’s lipstick.
• Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.Dear Abby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
Forgetful 25-year-old looking for solution Dear Dr. Gott: Is there anything I can do about my memory? I am 25 and seem to have a real problem remembering things, whether it’s studying for a test or something my wife has told me to remember. It’s frustrating for both of us. Dear Reader: Memory loss, whether short- or long-term, in young adults can be the result of a variety of causes. It occurs when the portion of the brain that stores memory becomes compromised. Shortterm loss issues include brain infections such as meningitis and encephalitis, traumatic brain injuries, vitamin B1 deficiency and specific drugs. Meningitis is inflammation or infection of the membranes that cover the brain and spinal cord. There are a number of types of meningitis, including bacterial, aseptic, Cryptococcus, tuberculous and those caused by the coxsackievirus or echovirus. Encephalitis is inflammation of the brain. It can be caused by a viral infection transmitted by an infected mosquito, the herpes viruses, childhood infections (such as measles, mumps and rubella) and arboviruses. Other causes include lead or other poisoning or bleeding. Post-infectious encephalitis can result from measles, chickenpox or other infection and can follow a smallpox vaccination. Traumatic brain injuries can occur from an automobile accident, falls, blows to the head and similar incidents. Vitamin B1 deficiency, also known as Wernicke-Korsakoff syndrome, is induced by alcoholism and chronic malnourishment. Short- and long-term memory loss may result. Recreational drug use, including LSD, cocaine, PCP, alcohol and marijuana, can affect memory, as can prescription barbiturates, tricyclic antidepressants, aminophylline, methyldopa, digoxin, diuretics and others. Improvement is often noticed once the offending drug has been discontinued. Then there’s sleep deprivation, stress, depression, job insecurity, additional responsibilities, financial concerns and information overload. Has something occurred in your life that weighs heavily? Do you have a parent who is ill, mounting bills, marital issues, school scholarships dependent on your grades, a failing car, insomnia or other issues that need to be addressed? Does your wife want to have a child but you don’t feel ready? Life today appears fraught with numerous issues that are sometimes difficult to handle. Perhaps the first step is to speak with her to bring things of concern out into the open. You may simply be picking up on something going on in her life that you don’t completely understand.
ASK THE DOCTOR Dr. PETER
When was the last time you had an examination by your family physician? If one is overdue, schedule an appointment to make sure that there is no medical reason for your forgetfulness. Ask whether lab work or other testing is appropriate to rule out any deficiencies. Maybe counseling for one or both of you will get things back on the right track.
THAT SCRAMBLED WORD GAME by Mike Argirion and Jeff Knurek
Unscramble these four Jumbles, one letter to each square, to form four ordinary words.
ZISEE ©2010 Tribune Media Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
NEW BIBLE Jumble Books Go To: http://www.tyndale.com/jumble/
Dear Abby: I’m a divorced, middle-aged professional woman with a doctorate who has been keeping company with a man my age for seven years. “Burt” treats me well. He takes me out, has helped with some major home renovation projects, sends me flowers and I enjoy his company. I’m perfectly happy in his world, and I like most of his friends. On the flip side, Burt is overweight, has a drinking problem and never finished college. My problem is, I can’t bring myself to introduce him to those in my “professional circle.” I’m afraid he will say something boorish, show up drunk or otherwise embarrass me. Is there something intrinsically wrong with me that I’m ashamed to have the man I love meet people with whom I work and socialize? Is there something wrong with the relationship? — It’s complicated in Wisconsin
Now arrange the circled letters to form the surprise answer, as suggested by the above cartoon.
• Jumbles: Write to Dr. Peter Gott in care of United Yesterday’s Answer: Media, P.O. Box 167, Wickliffe, OH 440920167. RELEASE DATE– Tuesday, May 18, 2010
(Answers tomorrow) CHAFE EXULT OPPOSE QUAVER What the foggy night gave the driver — THE “CREEPS”
Los Angeles Times Daily Crossword Puzzle Edited by Rich Norris and Joyce Nichols Lewis
ACROSS 1 Resolute about 6 Unwanted e-mail 10 Church recess 14 Wind: Prefix 15 Doily material 16 Dom Perignon producer, familiarly 17 Grammy winner Jones 18 Gillette razor 19 College in New Rochelle, N.Y. 20 Provide some room illumination 23 In the past 24 Monogram of a ’50s White House aspirant 25 Speedy 27 “Popcorn” shellfish 30 Conditions 32 Anthem contraction 33 On the fence 36 Really long time 37 TV promo exhortation 40 Decorative vases 41 Bright spot on a lunar halo 42 Brit’s rainwear 43 Hymnals may be found in one 44 Marked down 48 Emergency tire 50 Lab greeting 52 Teachers’ org. 53 Disappear from the radar, so to speak 58 Kennedy half, e.g. 59 Resting on 60 Dote on 61 Thoreau’s Walden __ 62 Jeweler Lalique 63 More under the weather 64 Golden Fleece ship 65 Went lickety-split 66 Timothy who preached the message found in this puzzle’s theme DOWN 1 December temps
2 “Stop!” 3 More than just fear 4 Arabian Sea nation 5 Manhattan area above Houston Street 6 Pool table layer 7 They may be beaten 8 Farm unit 9 Cafeteria offering 10 Chihuahua gal pal 11 Express disdain for 12 Conscious 13 Greek vowel 21 Quiet period at day care 22 1040-issuing org. 26 AMA members 28 Holiday buildings? 29 Bartender on “The Simpsons” 30 Red meat nutrient 31 Keep away 34 Winter blanket 35 __-Aztecan languages
36 Bacon go-with 37 Hidden way out, maybe 38 Hardly sympathetic 39 Electrical particle 40 Speaker’s hesitations 43 Get-up-and-go 45 Zambia neighbor 46 “PBS NewsHour” anchor Jim 47 Hash house, e.g.
49 Sonata movement 50 Make things right 51 Blocked (off), as a crime scene 54 Dory propellers 55 Sun Bowl Stadium coll. team 56 Go to sea 57 Goofing off 58 22-Down employee
ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE:
By Timothy L. Meaker (c)2010 Tribune Media Services, Inc.