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Page 2 • Valley Bugler • November 2016

From the Editor’s Desk The month of thanks. Also the month of turkey, pumpkins and sweet things that find their way into our bellies during our thanks giving. Delicious steaming turkey, with stuffing overflowing, creamed corn, sweet potatos, homemade cranberry sauce and my mom's infamous 7-layer salad will most definitely be gracing our dinner plates. Do you think of warmth, smiles and rosy cheeks? Comfortable conversations with those you hold dear? Laughter and relaxed banter over a game of Pictionary or cards? Beautifully decorated tables with children young and old reaching for the desserts? Ahhhhhhh. Yes. Hopefully something in that array of imagery provides something that you will be thankful for this Thanksgiving season. I truly hope that you are not dreading Thanksgiving, but relishing the experience as you may envision it unfolding. In addition to this month of thanks, it is our annual time to VOTE. Yes. VOTE. The right of every legal citizen of this country, age 18 and older. One that far too many do not take advantage of, yet still complain about issues within their sphere of influence. What is your sphere of influence? Outside of your family and friends, your sphere impacts your place of work, the grocery store line, and anywhere else that you happen to place your feet that day. Online, your sphere of influence impacts so many more than it did just ten years ago. Or even five years ago... I encourage you to consider your sphere this November. As you thoughtfully place your ballot marks where your heart has led you to mark,

consider the influence. It is our great and unalienable right to vote for those in this country that we hold as our "choice". What a freedom! What a freedom! What I personally do not consider a freedom is the level of vitriol and political shaming that is happening in our country today - over the very inalienable right that each one of our citizens hold - voting. Political shaming is the very landscape of our online media. Take Facebook or Twitter, for example. There are millions of posts, from all sides of the political spectrum - shaming those who happen to hold an opposite view. Appalling. So much so that I have chosen to disengage from the melee, and simply post photos or other “nonpolitical” type comments. Certainly, this grieves my heart to no end. Does it grieve yours? Or, perhaps you are one of the contributors, and this editorial is making you slightly uncomfortable? If so, I encourage you to press into what I am bringing to discussion here. When did our nation take a step backwards? When did we slip down the slope of moral accountability with one another? When did we reach a point where name calling, slander, brutal swearing and “un-friending” happens - all over a political view or stance? Never have I seen such a violent landscape of emotion than on Facebook and Twitter. This, my friends, is grievous. We have lost the art of discussion. We have lost the art of debate. Just look at our 2016 Presidential Debates, and that speaks for itself.

Publication Information Valley Bugler, LLC

Longview, WA (360)414-1246 eMail:

Editor/Publisher....................... Michelle Myre Web Manager ........................ Oscar Myre IV Cover Design ........................ Oscar Myre IV, Michelle Myre Distribution ............................. Diana Jones Advertising Sales................... Michelle Myre Columnists............................... Listed below Blake Peterson - Movie Reviews Georgia Butterfield - Adorable Adoptee Georgia Cox - Castle Rock Seniors Oscar Myre IV - Geek Speak Pat Nelson - Windows on Woodland /valleybuglernewspaper Paddy Burrow - Fruits & Nuts PeaceHealth - Living Well **The Valley Bugler newspaper publishes content supplied from the above columnists, and is not responsible for factual mistakes or anything other than the occasional spelling error. The Valley Bugler does not endorse views expressed, but retains a neutral stance on all advertisements, issues and articles printed, unless otherwise stated.**

EMAIL: EDITOR@VALLEYBUGLER.COM Polite consideration is out of the question for most, listening and commenting on a view different than yours with integrity is out of the question, shaming tactics and verbal abuse is now the norm for the majority. Countless millions have been quoted as "unfriending" those that believe differently than they do.... Why? Why have we allowed this to continue? I ask you, good people, why? Perhaps you are like myself, and are simply overwhelmed by the sheer magnitude of hate that seems to stem from our human counterparts towards one another. Simply for holding a different view on a solution to the same

problem. Our elected officials, even in the highest office, have participated gladly in painting the landscape in these horrid colors. It's truly embarrassing to journey along the comments and discussions on FaceBook or Twitter. People choosing to use the social media platform as one to justify "saying" something that they would absolutely NOT say to someone's face, or in the presence of others. How do we go about changing this tide? Consider your sphere of influence, my friends. Use it wisely. Your sphere of influence can impact the actions of others, and instead of creating mayhem and hurt, perhaps create thankfulness and positivity. I know that sounds like a bunch of hog wash to some that perhaps are so bent on "being right", they they have forgotten the right of others to hold an opinion. The challenge is on, as we continue forward in this determinably hostile online landscape. Will you contribute to the hatred, shaming and childish behavior of those around you? Or will you choose a different path? We can learn and put so much of Martin Luther King Jr's teaching to incredibly good use in our own current times: " Let us not seek to satisfy our thirst for freedom by drinking from the cup of bitterness and hatred. We must forever conduct our struggle on the high plane of dignity and discipline... I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character. I have a dream today!" - Martin Luther King Jr I am thankful for those of you that take the time to read my columns each month, and consider what I have to say. Even if you disagree with me. Whether you know it or not, those who write to me or call are a huge source of encouragement. That is an example of using your sphere of influence to make an impact, even if done unknowingly. How are you shaping your sphere during this season of Thanksgiving? Until next month! Michelle Myre Publisher / Editor

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Do the Turkey Trot on Thanksgiving Morn!

8:30am Competitive Runners 8:32am Runners 8:35am Walkers Pop the turkey in the oven and then grab the whole family and head over to the Lions Shelter at Lake Sacajawea in Longview, WA for the Annual Thanksgiving Turkey Trot! Gives us a good excuse to eat all that turkey and trimmings later in the day. Prizes for fast times, best costumes, largest family participation and more. Deadline for shirts is Tuesday November 15th, T-shirt, tech shirt or long sleeve shirts available, $10, $15 and $15.

Hilarious Signs in Seattle These signs are from Wallingford Chevron, just outside of Seattle, WA. They bring a giggle to the days of passerby's and now, hopefully, to you as well.

Day of race registration starts at 7:00 AM and is $15.00 without shirt, $25 with shirt. Packet Pick up is from 12:00-6:00 PM Wednesday November 23rd at the Recreation Office. Random prize drawings, too so you could win just ‘cuz you’re lucky. Never run/walk a 5K before? Well this Turkey Trot is one of the best ones to get started. It’s around beautiful Lake Sacajawea, and nobody’s out to do anything other than make it around the lake! If you’re looking to do some training before the trot, here are some tips to getting you turkeys, I mean, people, into shape! First of all, you have to register. Once you’re registered, you’re committed! Day 1: Walk 15 minutes Day 2: Walk 1 mile Day 3: Walk 1.5 miles Day 4: Rest Each consecutive week, build in 10 minute increments and adding .5 a mile each week. (Or more if you can). Throw in 10 mins of other exercise too, like bike riding, jumping jacks, etc. on your days of walking. Complete rest on your day of rest.

It’s time to bust out the gingerbread, icing and candies for the annual Gingerbread Haus Contest! Do you think you have the best Gingerbread decorating skills in the Northwest? Well then, you need to get your application over to The Broadway Gallery, or Teague’s Interiors, both located on Commerce Avenue in Longview. (Applications available at both locations, or online). Then, after you have created your masterpiece extraoardinaire, the house needs to be gingerly delivered to The Broadway Gallery for judging and display. Application Deadline - Nov. 30th!! Contest Judging - Dec. 2nd (Judging is done prior to the Home for the Holidays Christmas Parade). Public viewing will be from noon to 7pm on December 3rd, the day of the parade, at the Broadway Gallery. Prizes will be available in nine different categories. Age related brackets (8 and younger, 9-12yrs, 13-17yrs, 18+), local landmarks, heartwarming houses, other gingerbread originals, professional, people’s choice youth, people’s choice adult, candy and other edibles, and a Professional category for bakers, chefs and culinary instructors. The judging will take place at 2p.m. Judging will be based upon on de-

tail, balanced proportions, consistency, and realistic/whimsical. ONLINE:

Baking / Creating Tips:

Snow Sprinkle shredded coconut on top of the icing before it drys and sprinkle white sanding sugar on top of the coconut for sparkly snow. Bushes Make bushes out of green gum drops or green jelly spearmint leaves. Drip royal icing over the bushes for a "snow capped" look. Christmas Trees Use a pointed ice cream cone. Tint a portion of the royal icing green. Put in a piping bag with a leaf pastry tip. Hold the cone by the tip and start at the bottom, icing from bottom to top. Make one row around the open edge in a wavelike motion, continuing up the cone to the top. Sprinkle green sanding or sparkling sugar crystals on the wet icing before "gluing" into place on the board. Decorate!

Page 4 • Valley Bugler • November 2016

Recognizing Individuals on Veterans Day • Nov 11 On November 11th 2016, we honor the men and women who have served us, including veterans of Korea, Vietnam, and particularly our most recent group of veterans, those who served (or are serving) in Afghanistan, Iraq and the Middle East. We don’t want to honor them as a group, but as individuals. For each who put his or her life on the line, or worked behind a desk, it was a very personal experience. For those recovering from the effects of war, it is very much an individual experience. Our veterans today are everyday men and women. We know them as friends, neighbors, relatives and coworkers. They have persevered and strengthened our country with their sacrifices and contributions, many of which were beyond duty’s call. Veter-

ans are some of our finest citizens. As we honor them today, we also think about their successors, those who are fighting to defend our freedom at home and abroad. Make it a priority on the 11th to seek out at least one individual whom you know that is a veteran. Take some time to speak with them about their experiences, and then most importantly, thank them for their sacrifices. For they have sacrificed much much more than just their time. It is an honor to know a veteran, for it is their life blood that they laid down and made vulnerable on the battlefield for our life blood. Thank you, Veterans. Each and every one of you - individually. Each of you has a different story to tell, and we would be honored to hear them.

Not just on veterans day - but any day of the year. May God bless and keep you and your families all the rest of your days. Now we look deeper into how this day came to be in this country you have sacrificed for. According to the US Department of Veteran Affairs, World War I – known at the time as “The Great War” - officially ended when the Treaty of Versailles was signed on June 28, 1919, in the Palace of Versailles outside the town of Versailles, France. However, fighting ceased seven months earlier when an armistice, or temporary cessation of hostilities, between the Allied nations and Germany went into effect on the eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month. For that reason, November 11, 1918, is generally regarded as the end of “the war to end all wars.” In November 1919, President Wilson proclaimed November 11 as the first commemoration of Armistice Day with the following words: "To us in America, the reflections of Armistice Day will be filled with solemn pride in the heroism of those who died in the country’s service and with gratitude for the victory, both because of the thing from which it has freed us and because of the opportunity it has given America to show her sympathy

with peace and justice in the councils of the nations…" The original concept for the celebration was for a day observed with parades and public meetings and a brief suspension of business beginning at 11:00 a.m. The United States Congress officially recognized the end of World War I when it passed a concurrent resolution on June 4, 1926. After that date, the history of this special day changes slightly as the encounters of "War" continue to grow. The day on which Veterans Day was moved around throughout the year. Finally, it has ended up as Veterans Day continues to be observed on November 11, regardless of what day of the week on which it falls. The restoration of the observance of Veterans Day to November 11 not only preserves the historical significance of the date, but helps focus attention on the important purpose of Veterans Day: A celebration to honor America's veterans for their patriotism, love of country, and willingness to serve and sacrifice for the common good. God Bless you, Grandpa Oscar, Uncle Walt and Cousin Matthew. Thank you for your courage and service to this wonderful country. ♥

AIR FORCE MAINTENANCE Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by US Air Force pilots and the replies from the maintenance crews. "Squawks" are problem listings that pilots generally leave for maintenance crews. There's no specific name for the responses by the maintenance crew except....solution. Maybe you or one of your family members can relate to these exchanges, as commonly happen on military bases. To those who have served in our military, thank you for the humor presented here! ----Problem: "Left inside main tire almost needs replacement." Solution: "Almost replaced left inside main tire." Problem: "Test flight OK, except autoland very rough." Solution: "Autoland not installed on this aircraft."

Problem: "Something loose in cockpit." Solution: "Something tightened in cockpit." Problem: "Evidence of hydraulic leak on right main landing gear." Solution: "Evidence removed." Problem: "DME volume unbelievably loud." Solution: "Volume set to more believable level." Problem: "Dead bugs on windshield." Solution: "Live bugs on order." Problem: "Autopilot in altitude hold mode produces a 200 fpm descent." Solution: "Cannot reproduce problem on ground." Problem: "IFF inoperative." Solution: "IFF inoperative in OFF mode."

Problem: "#2 Propeller seeping prop fluid." Solution: "#2 Propeller seepage normal."

Problem: "Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick." Solution: "That's what they're there for."

Problem: "#1, #3 and #4 propellers lack normal seepage." Solution: "Signed off: IT DOES NOW."

Problem: "Number three engine missing." Solution: "Engine found on right wing after brief search."

November 2016 • Valley Bugler • Page 5

November is Native American Heritage Month

People lived in the United States long before Christopher Columbus sailed the ocean blue. These people and cultures are called Native Americans. November is the national observance of Native American heritage, those peoples who were indigenous to these lands that we call home. What does indigenous mean? The first people to live in a land are called indigenous peoples. This means they were the original settlers.

Sometimes these people groups are referred to as Indians, or American Indians. This is because when Columbus had first landed in America, he actually thought he had sailed all the way to the country of India. He called the locals 'Indians', and the name stuck for a very long while. Native Americans were grouped into tribes or nations, usually based on the area they lived in, and their culture (religion, customs and language). There were hundreds of tribes throughout the United States when Columbus and the first Europeans arrived, such as the Cherokee, Apache and Navajo. Today, there are reservations, or areas of land set aside specifically for Native Americans. Only 30% live on reservations, and the remainder live outside the reservations. Local tribes include the Cowlitz, Chinook, Duwamish, Hoh and more.

BLACK November [Editor’s Note: Back by popular demand, we will print this poem each year and make it an annual event to find here in the Valley Bugler. Gobble Gobble!] When I was a young turkey, new to the coop... My big brother Mike took me out on the stoop... Then he sat me down, and he spoke real slow... And he told me there was something I had to know... His look and his tone I will always remember... When he told me of the horrors of, Black November... Come about August, now listen to me, Each day you’ll get six meals instead of just three... And soon you’ll be thick, where once you were thin... And you’ll grow a big rubbery thing under your chin... And then one morning, when you’re warm in your bed... It’ll burst the farmer’s wife, and hack off your head. Then she’ll pluck out your feathers so you’re bald ‘n pink... And scoop out your insides and leave ya lyin’ in the sink... And then comes the worst part,” he said not bluffing... She’ll spread your cheeks and

pack your rear end with stuffing... Well, the rest of his words were too grim to repeat... I sat on the stoop like a winged piece of meat... I decided on the spot that to avoid being cooked... I’d have to lay low and remain overlooked... I began a new diet of nuts and granola, High-roughage salads, juice and diet cola... And as they ate pastries, chocolates and crepes... I stayed in my room doing Jane Fonda tapes... I maintained my weight of two pounds and a half... And tried not to notice when the bigger birds laughed... But it was I who was laughing, under my breath... As they chomped and they chewed, ever closer to death... And sure enough when Black November rolled around... I was the last turkey left in the whole compound... So now I’m a pet in the farmer’s wife’s lap... I haven’t a worry, so I eat and I nap. She held me today, while sewing and humming... And smiled at me and sang, “Christmas is coming...”


Lighter side ☺

THE FUNERAL A priest, a rabbi, a doctor and a lawyer are gathered at a mutual friend's graveside to mourn his passing. The priest says to the others, "I think our good friend would have liked to take something with him to his next life." He pulls a $100 bill from his wallet and drops it on the casket. The rabbi agrees, "That's a fine idea," and drops his own $100 bill on the casket. The doctor, not to be outdone, does the same. The lawyer murmurs, "What a wonderful thought," as he gazes down at their friend's casket. Whipping out his pen, he quickly writes a check for $400, drops it into the grave and takes the three $100 bills as change.

BIRTHDAY DRINKS An elderly lady bellies up to the ship's bar and orders a Scotch with two drops of water. The bartender gives her the drink, and she says, "I'm on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday And it's today." The bartender says, "Well, since it's your birthday, this one is on me." As the woman finishes her drink, the woman to her right says, "I would like to buy you a drink, too." The woman says, "Thank you, how sweet of you. OK then, Bartender, I want a Scotch with two drops of water." "Coming up," says the bartender. As she finishes that drink, the man to her left says, "I would like to buy you a drink too." The woman says, "Thank you very much. My dear. Bartender, I'll have another Scotch with two drops of water."

"Coming right up," the bartender says. As he gives her the drink this time, he says, "Ma'am, I'm dying of curiosity. Why the Scotch with only two drops of water?" The old woman giggles and replies, "Sonny, when you're my age, you've learned how to hold your liquor. Water, however, is a whole other issue!" BREAKING NEWS Three sailors have been rescued from an uninhabited Pacific island by the US Navy after spelling out "help" with palm fronds. Speaking to reporters after the rescue one of them said, "We considered using sea anemones to spell out the message but then we thought, with fronds like these, who needs anemones?" ONE LINERS * The more you go through parenting, the more you realize that you owe your mother and father an apology. * The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you're in the bathroom. * When an employment application asks who is to be notified in case of emergency, I always write, "A very good doctor".

Page 6 • Valley Bugler • November 2016

Submitted by Georgia Cox NOVEMBER Events Every Monday: Our delectable Cinnamon Rolls and coffee will be served to the public from 10am to NOON. Suggested donation is only $1.50 for these delicious concessions. A great way to start your week! Every Monday, Wednesday & Friday: Get that heart rate up and get healthy with the exercise classes from 9:30am to 10:30am! Every 1st and 3rd Tuesday: Write Your Life Story group will meet in the Center from 1pm-3pm. Every Tuesday: Games, cards and visiting from 12pm-3pm. All are welcome to this leisurely time. Every Wednesday: CAP offers Nutrition Meals for Seniors at the Center at NOON. Suggested donation is $3.00, PLEASE call #6362118 (by Monday) for reservations. Pape Tole classes are offered from 1pm - 3pm. Every Thursday: Quilting projects will take place from 12pm to 3pm and fun Pinochle games are played in the Center later at 7pm and is open to all who are interested! Every Friday: Lunches by reservation only, will be served in the Center at NOON. Must Reserve by

calling 636-2118 by Monday. Every Saturday: BINGO! games will be played from 1pm - 3pm. Please come and join in for a fun afternoon. (NO Bingo on November 5th.) SPECIAL EVENTS: Saturday, November 5th: The annual "Christmas in November" sale and Bake Sale from 9am - 3pm, featuring goodies of every shape and style. Something for everyone! Tuesday, November 8th: Program presentation features local paramedics from Castle Rock Fire Station, presenting vital information at 11am, followed by a potluck lunch at noon. Please join us for this informative time, and for a good lunch. Thursday, November 17th: Commodities will be distributed from 10am - 1pm. Have a valid punch card. *Please watch the reader board for any announcements during the coming holiday weeks. Any person age 50+ is invited to join the Castle Rock Senior Center. Lifetime membership is $5.00 Castle Rock Senior Center 222 - 2nd Ave Castle Rock, WA 98611 (360)274-7502

Thankful for Every Single Trial By Paddy Elkins Valley Bugler Columnist

This is the month we all are reminded to be thankful for the many blessings God has bestowed upon us as individuals, communities, and as a nation. We are a blessed people, to be sure. And God must love it when we pause to thank Him for all He's done for us. In fact, His Word says we should enter His gates with thanksgiving, and His courts with praise. God doesn't appreciate it when His children whine, grumble, murmur and complain. Not when He's given us everything we 'll ever need to be Content and Joyful! One verse in James has always been difficult for me, though: "... count it all joy when you fall into diverse temptations; knowing this, that the trying of your faith works patience. But let patience have her perfect work, that you may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing." Learning to give thanks "in everything" has been a lifelong challenge for me, and I'm still struggling with it, although God HAS resolved past trials and brought good out of even the tragedies that have befallen me, but STILL, it's hard to say (and really mean) "Thank You" to

the Lord when I'm facing a big tax bill or "the thirteenth rainy day in a row" or our small dog who barks excessively in our "space" - leaving us feeling stressed and frustrated. But, YES, I am learning that "Thank You" is always the right thing to say to God. We GROW through trials. We LEARN valuable lessons through trials. We become STRONG as we endure trial after trial. We become our best selves: compassionate, caring, wise. As we learn to ride out a trial and see it through to its conclusion, these attributes develop. Sometimes we see God redeem the situation, and sometimes we must just trust that He WILL redeem the situation, but either way, we can, and should be thankful for every single trial. Because it means that God is still working on us. He's the Potter. We're the clay. Trust. Obey. Be thankful! Paddy Elkins invites your feedback! You may Email her at: or call her at 360-751-5231.

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Please enjoy this extensive and hopefully comprehensive list of bazaars (up to date when published), and keep it handy throughout the month. December Bazaars will be in the December issue. Have a Bazaar in December? Please call us to get it printed in the next issue!! (360)414-1246 Please also feel free to visit our FaceBook page and post your Bazaar information. Special thanks to Brian Stapleman and Kamber Kubitz for helping phone, research and gather information compiled for this page! You are awesome! ☺

Friday, November 4th: Homespun from the Heart Bazaar First Church of the Nazarene 1119 W 1st St, Centralia, WA Nov. 4, 10am - 7pm Nov. 5, 10am - 3pm Booths of Handcrafted gifts, fresh baked goods and soups.

Saturday, November 5th: 8th Annual Holiday Bazaar Winlock Assembly of God Church 702 SE 1st St., Winlock November 5th, 9 am - 3 pm Vendors call 360-430-6421 77th Annual Joyous Holiday Bazaar First United Methodist Church 206 Cowlitz Way, Kelso WA November 5th, 9 am - 3 pm Lunch Served 11:30am - 1:30pm (Call 423-7480 for lunch pricing; Raffles every 30 mins!) Christmas in November & Bake Sale Castle Rock Senior Center 222 - 2nd Ave, Castle Rock WA November 5th, 9am - 3pm Vendors Call 274-7502 Kalama Community Holiday Bazaar 216 Elm Street, Kalama WA November 5th, 8am - 4pm Bingo @ 5:30pm, Apple Pies avail. 37th Annual Toy Soldier Bazaar Cowlitz County Event Center 1900 - 7th Ave, Longview WA November 5th, 9am-4pm

Proceeds to benefit local community member in severe medical need.

Homespun from the Heart Bazaar First Church of the Nazarene 1119 W 1st St, Centralia, WA Nov. 4, 10am - 7pm

Nov. 5, 10am - 3pm Booths of Handcrafted gifts, fresh baked goods and soups.

Gifts, pet adoptions and Santa photos, and Mrs. Claus Workshop! $5, under 12 FREE, Free Parking! Free admission for ages 55+ on Senior Friday!

Sons of Norway Bazaar & Lunch 224 Catlin Street, Longview WA November 5th, 9am - 3pm Christmas bazaar and pea soup luncheon! Come join in the fun.

Winter Wonderland Bazaar Somerset Retirement Community 2025 Tibetts Drive, Longview November 18th, 9am- 3pm

Friday, November 11th Christmas at the Canterbury Inn 1324 3rd Ave, Longview  WA November 11th, 9am - 4pm Lunch available for purchase, Complimentary child/Santa photos, Shuttle service available from the Cowlitz Expo Center (See ad.) Joyful Season Bazaar 201 Cowlitz St. W, Castle Rock November 11th & 12th, 10am-4pm All handcrafted items and signs! Be sure to come visit and shop.

Saturday, November 12th Broadway Gallery Holiday Open 1418 Commerce Ave, LV November 12th, 10am - 4pm Handmade cards, ornaments and art, Live Music and refreshments! Chehalis Eagles Holiday Bazaar 1993 S. Market Blvd, Chehalis November 12th & 13th, 10am-3pm Crafters located in 2 buildings; tables available, call 360-520-0772. Downtown Bridge Market Bazaar Cowlitz County Expo Center 1900 7th Ave. Longview WA November 12th, 9 am - 4 pm Lots of vendors, lots of fun! Holly Daze Bazaar Kalama United Methodist 111 N. 2nd St, Kalama WA November 12th, 10am - 4pm Joyful Season Bazaar 403 Balcer St., Castle Rock WA November 11th & 12th, 10am-4pm All handcrafted items and signs! Be sure to come visit and shop.

Friday, November 18th: “Holiday Gift Fair + Pet adoption” Clark County Event Center 17402 NE Delfel Rod, Ridgefield November 18th-20th Fri/Sat 10am-6pm, Sun 11am-4pm

‘Our hearts grow tender with childhood memories and love of kindred, and we are better throughout the year for having, in spirit, become a child again at Christmas-time.' - Laura Ingalls Wilder

Woodland Care Center Bazaar 310 - 4th St., Woodland WA November 18th-19th, 9am - 4pm Vendors call 360-225-9443, limited space available, reserve early

Saturday, November 19th 3 Rivers Christmas Shopping Festival Three Rivers Christian School 2610 Ocean Beach Hwy, Lngvw November 19th, 10am - 4pm Soup Luncheon 11:30am - 3:30pm, Kids’ Carnival, Prize Drawings 31st Annual Snowflake Bazaar Woodland Elementary School 600 Bozarth, Woodland WA November 19th, 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Over 60 vendors, fun awaits!!

“Holiday Gift Fair + Pet adoption” Clark County Event Center 17402 NE Delfel Rod, Ridgefield November 18th-20th

Fri/Sat 10am-6pm, Sun 11am-4pm Gifts, pet adoptions and Santa photos, and Mrs. Claus Workshop! $5, under 12 FREE, Free Parking! Free admission for ages 55+ on Senior Friday!

St. James Holiday Gift Fair St. James Family Center 1138 Columbia St., Cathlamet November 19th, 10 a.m. to 4 p.m Benefits Family Center Woodland Care Center Bazaar 310 - 4th St., Woodland WA November 18th-19th, 9am - 4pm Vendors call 360-225-9443, limited space available, reserve early

Friday, November 25th Portland Expo Christmas Bazaar 2060 N. Marine Drive, Portland OR November 25-27 December 2-4 F/S 10am-6pm, Sun. 10am-5pm Admission: $7 adults, $6 Seniors, $3 ages 12-17, Under 12 free, *Free admission on December 2nd with 2 cans of food.

Saturday, November 26th: Small Business Saturday Sale The Merk, 1330 Commerce, Lgvw November 26th, 10am - 4pm Featuring handcrafted items, local area businesses, direct sales, and nonprofits. Benefits local charity.

Thursday, December 1st: Artisan Guild of Mt St Helens Bazaar Cassava's on 14th & Broadway, LV December 1st & 2nd, 9am-6pm Creative gifts, stained glass, photography, jewelry, handmade dog Christmas stockings, and cat/dog treats sold to benefit Humane Society

Saturday, December 3rd Community Hospice Bazaar 1035 - 11th Ave, Longview WA December 3rd, 9am - 3pm Handcrafted items, Benefits Community Home, Health & Hospice Handcrafted Holiday Bazaar McClelland Arts Center 951 Delaware, Longview WA December 3rd, 10am - 3pm Home-made & handcrafted items.

Saturday, December 10th Toutle Country Christmas Bazaar Toutle Lake School 5050 Spirit Lake Hwy, Toutle December 10th, 9am - 5pm Breakfast & Lunch avail for $$; benefit Toutle VFW and Toutle Lake Girl Scouts; tables call 360-431-9802

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Ahhhh, Thanksgiving! From the early days of history, people set aside a day of thanksgiving. Usually it was for a bountiful harvest. Some days of thanksgiving were declared for special events such as the safe return of a ship. The ancients thanked their gods and goddesses. They offered fruits, vegetables, and cakes to the deities of their choice and begged for a good year to come. Many countries today have a thanksgiving day of one kind or another. In Canada, it is combined with a celebration of the discovery of America and is held at the time we celebrate Columbus Day. Mexico does much the same with its Dia de la Raza, or Day of the Race. People celebrate the discovery of America, emphasize the brotherhood of races, and thank God all on the same day. In the U.S., Thanksgiving Day has a flavor all its own, and we’re not just talking about turkey, cranberry sauce and pumpkin pie. We give thanks for our blessings

in the current year, but we have a historic event to commemorate as well. In few places is Thanksgiving as colorful a celebration as it is here. We have turkeys to eat and Pilgrims to recreate in our plays. We remember and honor the Native Americans who helped these early Americans survive. And we mark the foundation of a society where citizens elected leaders and made early laws of fair play and freedom. New traditions are seeping into our traditional celebration, like watching a football game after dinner. But after all, it’s a free country, and we’re mighty thankful for that. You may not be having duck, fish and deer for Thanksgiving dinner, as the Pilgrims did, but gathering with family and friends is probably in your plans. What we think of as the first thanksgiving in 1621 was made possible in part by the Pilgrims friends and neighbors.

An anonymous Thanksgiving Story One Thanksgiving, Mom and I went to my sister Patty’s house for the traditional feast. Knowing how gullible Patty is, Mom decided to liven up the day and have a little fun. As it turned out, the joke wasn’t that funny. First, Mom sent Patty to the store. When she left, Mom took the turkey from the oven, removed the stuffing, inserted a Cornish hen, restuffed the turkey and put it back

into the oven. At dinner time, Patty brought the turkey out and started to remove the stuffing. When her spoon hit something, she pulled out the little bird. With a faked look of shock on her face, Mom exclaimed, “Patricia, you’ve cooked a pregnant turkey!” Horrified, Patty burst into tears! It took the family half an hour to convince her that turkeys just lay eggs.

Massasoit, leader of the confederacy of Wampanoag tribes, and about 90 of his men, brought deer and other meats to the Pilgrim's harvest celebration. The Pilgrims certainly needed the friends. After a year in the New World, their numbers had declined by half and they had faced deprivation and hardship. The Wampanoag's generosity was surely welcome. Today, we still get along with a little help from our friends, neighbors and Creator. Let's give thanks for our countrymen, our families, and our faith which help us through good and bad times. Here are some not-widely known facts about the Pilgrims: • Before the Pilgrims hired her, the Mayflower, a merchant vessel, was in the wine trade with France, and before that, the fish trade with Norway. • The Pilgrims were actually called "Separatists" or "Calvinists", and followed the spiritual and Biblical teachings of John Calvin. • Before the Pilgrims sailed for the New World, they lived in Holland. (They were chased out of England). • The Pilgrims did not name Plymouth. Captain John Smith explored the New England coast in 1614. He then gave his map to Prince Charles (who become King Charles), and Charles put English names on the

map. Hence - Plymouth. • In the Pilgrim household, the adults sat down for dinner and the children waited on them. • Pilgrims used the word "corn" to refer to wheat, rye, barley, oats, peas and beans. "Indian corn" or "turkey wheat" referred to what we now know as corn. * The Pilgrims did not use a fork to eat their Thanksgiving dinner feast. Sarah Josepha Hale, editor of the popular women’s magazine Godey’s Lady’s Book, began a campaign in 1827 to make Thanksgiving a national holiday. Sarah Josepha Hale also wrote Mary Had a Little Lamb. In 1863, Hale was able to convince President Lincoln that a national Thanksgiving might unite the country after the Civil War. Lincoln declared two national Thanksgivings that year, August 6 celebrating the victory at Gettysburg, and the last Thursday in November. In order to help the country economically, Franklin Delano Roosevelt lengthened the Christmas shopping season by declaring Thanksgiving for the next-to-the-last Thursday in November in 1939. In 1941, Congress permanently established the holiday as the fourth Thursday of November. Happy Thanksgiving, my fellow Americans! Eat well and love the ones you're with.

Page 10 • Valley Bugler • November 2016

Photo at Left: Woodland resident, Bob Fleischmann, shown here on the infamous Lady Washington, a small merchant sailing vessel that has starred in many movies, including Pirates of the Caribbean. Photo provided by Pat Nelson.

By Pat Nelson Valley Bugler Columnist "Every 10-year-old boy loves dinosaurs and pirates," said Woodland resident Bob Fleischmann, "and I'm a 69-year-old 10-year-old." Fleischmann, a former submariner, lived his dream recently when he spent more than three weeks as a volunteer crewmember aboard a tall ship, the Lady Washington. He first visited this ship three years ago in Portland after reading about it in The Columbian. On that visit, he learned about a program to train volunteer crewmembers, so in 2014 he enrolled in a two-week program where he climbed rigging, studied terminology and learned commands. After learning the ropes . . . er, lines . . . Fleischmann qualified as a volunteer

deckhand. In 2016, he volunteered to take part in a voyage that included the filming in Canada of an episode of Once Upon a Time during which the crewmembers dressed in period clothing. The Lady Washington has been in many TV shows and movies, including Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl. Fleischmann chose this tour because it would make a stop in Tacoma where he grew up and where some of his family still lives. He boarded in Port Orchard and from there went to Steveston, Canada, on the Fraser River, for the filming. From there, the Lady Washington sailed to Friday Harbor and then to Tacoma, where nearly 20 family members and friends went aboard for a battle sail. The Lady Washington and another tall ship, the Hawaiian Chieftain, went into the harbor, and under sail, they fired cannons at each other, creating lots of smoke and noise while passengers enjoyed heckling the rival ship. The Lady Washington stayed in Tacoma a week before sailing through the locks and into Lake Washington then spent two weeks at Carillon Point in Kirkland. There, the Lady Washington offered dockside tours, evening sails and battle sails. There was a child's pirate birthday party and another Peter Pan and Tinker

Bell party, plus two weddings . . . one dockside and one during a cruise. While living on the ship, Fleischmann slept on a bunk, but unlike on the original Lady Washington of the 1700s, these bunks were equipped with 3-inch foam pads. He described the food as fantastic, and said that after working hard all day, he and the other crewmembers were hungry. At 69, he was the oldest 10-year-old on the ship until the last day, when a 72year-old returning volunteer joined the crew. The mission of the Lady Washington is education. It is based out of Grays Harbor. At least three other small merchant sailing vessels named the Lady Washington have sailed, beginning in the 18th century.

In 1788, she became the first American vessel to make landfall on the West Coast of North America and was the first American ship to visit Honolulu, Hong Kong and Japan. The Lady Washington was used to establish trade between the U.S. and China. The current Lady Washington was launched in 1989 as part of the Washington State Centennial celebration. She is a full-scale replica of the original. For more information, visit: www.historical Pat Nelson, is co-creator of three humorous and sometimes edgy anthologies: ‘Not Your Mother’s Book: On Being a Parent’ ( & retailers); On Being a Grandparent; and On Working for a Living.

10 Tips to Get Through the Holidays By Kristin J Davis Lesh, RD, CD Valley Bugler Guest Columnist A recent article in the New England Journal of Medicine reports that Americans weigh the most at New Years and the least in the month of October. That means that the next few months need some extra attention if you’re planning to maintain your weight through the holidays. Here are some tips to help you make it through. • It’s a Holi-day, not a Holi-week or Holi-month! Don’t make the excuse that you have to go overboard with every meal, November through December. • Holiday drinks add extra calories – from coffee drinks to alcoholic beverages, try sugar free versions instead. • Pick your favorite indulgence and truly enjoy it! Instead of grazing around the food you really want, this strategy will allow you to get to the gratification without the guilt of overdoing it. • When invited to a party or eating event, bring something guilt-free to help keep from going overboard on high calorie foods. Other guests will appreciate having a healthier choice too! • Just like you should never go shopping hungry, the same strategy holds true for parties. Keep your reg-

ular eating routine going in-between these events so you don’t show up ravenous. • Find healthier versions of your favorite indulgences. It will make a difference to reduce sugar or calories in foods and drinks that typically add pounds and inches during the holidays. • Enjoy the holiday for what it is – connection with family, friends and community. • Be active. Recruit friends and family for an outing like walking the neighborhood looking at lights or getting a game of flag football in after dinner. Who knows? You might just make a new tradition! • Avoid added stress by enlisting the help of others at holiday get-togethers. Have your guests each bring something to the table so you only have to focus on one or two dishes. • Holidays can be a time of overbooking yourself. Take time to take care of yourself. A movie, book, bath, or walk can be a healthy distraction from stress-eating. N Engl J Med 2016; 375:1200-1202September 22, 2016 DOI: 10.1056/ NEJMc1602012

Author Kristin J Davis Lesh, RD, CD, works in PeaceHealth Nutrition and Diabetes Education.

Confused in Conversation CONFUSED IN CONVERSATION I was checking out at the busy super market, and the cashier was having problems. The register ran out of paper, the scanner malfunctioned, and finally the cashier spilled a handful of coins. When she totaled my order, it came to exactly $22. Trying to soothe her nerves, I said, "That's a nice round figure."

Still frazzled, she glared at me and said, "You're no bean pole yourself." TIRE BLOWOUT A software manager, a hardware manager, and a marketing manager are driving to a meeting when a tire blows. They get out of the car and look at the problem. The software manager says, "I can't do anything about this -- it's a hardware problem." The hardware manager says, "Maybe if we turned the car off and on again, it would fix itself." The marketing manager says, "Hey, 75% of it is working -- let's ship it!" MAGICIAN Teacher: What does your father do for a living? Student: He is a magician. Teacher: What is his favorite event? Student: He cuts people in two. Teacher: How many brothers and sisters do you have? Student: One half-brother and one half-sister....

November 2016 • Valley Bugler • Page 11

Julia Collins: Teacher of the Year

Sunnyside Grange has bestowed their coveted "Teacher of the Year" award to Julia Collins, pictured at left. Collins came to Castle Rock High School nine years ago and is a graduate of WSU, with many honors for her studies. She gets her love of animals and science from her grandfather who is a Professor of Science in a college in the Midwest. Demonstrating her infectious enthusiasm, when Collins started teaching, she was resposible for basic animal science, working with soils, and horticulture, with only 26 students, and now has 68, with more classes added. Collins heads up the Future Farmers of America group, and has brought in different programs to the classroom, such as floriculture - floral arranging, elementary outreach through pumpkin seed planting and education, and garden horticulture. Last year the CRHS gardens produced 14,000 pounds of food, and donated it to the food bank, senior center and the low income people of the community. Collins also directs students in helping with Festival of Lights greenery displays, America in Bloom, and the May Plant Sale, among so much more. Thank you Julia Collins - Sunnyside Grange's Teacher of the Year! [Photo provided by Yvonne Knuth]


Page 12 • Valley Bugler • November 2016

KIWANIS CLUBS focus their community service hours to the welfare of children. CATHLAMET 1st Tues. 6 p.m. at the St. Catherine’s Catholic Church; 3rd Tues. at Sugar Lillies at noon. CHEHALIS - Thursday 12 p.m. at “The Restaurant” in Sunbirds. CLATSKANIE - 1st & 3rd & 5th Tues 6 p.m. at Fultano’s; 2nd & 4th Tues 12 p.m. Colvin’s. KELSO - Thurs. noon at 3 Rivers Mall, Comm. Room. LONGVIEW - Thursdays. noon at JT’s. SCAPPOOSE- 1st & 3rd Wednesday 6:30 p.m. Windemere Real Estate Office) ST. HELENS - Thurs. noon at the Elks Lodge (350 Belton Rd, St Helens). ST. HELENS DAYBREAKERS - Tues 7 a.m. at Warren Country Inn, Last Tues 6pm Columbia Soil and Water District Office AMERICAN LEGION GLEN HOYER POST 175 meets in Castle Rock every 1st & 3rd Tuesdays, 7:30 p.m. For info call 423.9542. The LADIES AUXILIARY to Glen Hoyer Post #175 of the American Legion meets first Thursdays. For info call 423-9542. AMERICAN LEGION GUY RATHBUN Post #25 meets the 2nd Thurs. of the month at 7 p.m @ Kelso Eagles For info Kandi 423.2504 BUFORD ROCKAFELLOW POST 101, The American Legion, and Auxiliary meets the 2nd Friday of each month at the Winlock Community Building. Potluck 6 p.m., meeting at 7 p.m.. For info Post Commander Wendy Carolan 360-785-0929 or Adjutant Phil Carolan at (360) 785-0929. The FLEET RESERVE ASSOCIATION (FRA) Naval Service Veterans, Navy, Marine Corps, Coast Guard. Lower Columbia Branch 363 meets 6:30 p.m., 2nd Friday, Longview VFW building, 4311 Ocean Beach Highway. Information: Ray Hegr (360) 425-6981 FLEET RESERVE AUXILIARY #363 meets the 2nd Friday of the month at the VFW Hall, 4311 Ocean Beach Hwy, Longview. Potluck 6:30 p.m. meeting 7:30 p.m. Active, retired, or reserve status family members with the US Navy, Marines, Coast Guard. Info 425.4688. KOREAN WAR VETS ASSOCIATION CHAPTER #321 of SW WA meets the 3rd Wednesday of each month @ 10am; Vancouver WA. Call Commander James Mead (360)907-0592 for information. KELSO-LONGVIEW ELKS LODGE #1482 meets Thurs at 7:30 p.m. for our members only. Dinner is served before Lodge at 5:30 p.m. Lunches are served Monday-Friday 11 a.m.-2 p.m. 900 Ash St., Kelso. 360.425.1482. TOUTLE VALLEY VFW POST & AUXILIARY #10882 meets the 1st Tuesday @ 7 p.m. at their Post Home, 101 Hansen Road in Toutle. For more information, contact John at 274.4350 or Nikki at 274.5263. TOLEDO VFW 3429, Reg. Meeting 1st Monday, Potluck at noon, meeting at 1 p.m. COWLITZ VALLEY VFW POST 1045, Tues. Bingo @ 6 p.m., 5 p.m. dinner; Auxilary mtngs at 11 a.m. every 2nd Wednesday. Breakfast for veterans served 1st Sat. of each month $6 each from 9 - 11 a.m. The COWLITZ VALLEY VFW LADIES AUXILIARY POST #1045 meets the 2nd Wednesday at 11 a.m. at the VFW Hall located at 4311 Ocean Beach Hwy, Longview. For info or questions please call Ruby at (360) 577-0414 or Jeannette at (360) 414-4053. COWLITZ PRAIRIE GRANGE #737 meets 2nd Wednesdays 6:30pm potluck, 4th Wednesdays 7:30pm dessert. 5180 Jackson Hwy, Toledo, WA 864-2023 SUNNYSIDE GRANGE #129 meets the 1st & 3rd Thursdays. 6:30 for potluck, 7:30 meeting. Call 274.6013 for information & rental hall. SILVER LAKE GRANGE 2nd and 4th Thurs. Potluck 6:30, meeting at 7:30 p.m. Info Anita Morgan 748-8098, Rentals call Claudia Hunter 274-5263 CATLIN GRANGE #199 2nd & 4th Fri. 6:30 p.m. Potluck dinner 2nd Friday. 7:30 meetings. More info: 423-2122; Rental call Barbara Wilburn: 425-5970. PLEASANT HILL GRANGE # 101 2nd Monday. 6:30 p.m. Potluck, meeting @ 7:15 p.m. Community Service group meets Thursdays @ 10am. Info & rentals call Zula Bryan 360-425-6101 ROSE VALLEY GRANGE #953 2nd Tuesday, 1 p.m. 4th Tuesday, 6pm. Info & Hall Rental: Becky Molt 360575-3977 WOODLAND GRANGE #178 2nd & 4th Thursdays 6:30 p.m. Potluck, meeting @ 7:15 p.m. Info & rentals call John Burke 225-9888 CASTLE ROCK WOMANS CLUB meets every 2nd Monday at 1 p.m. 206 W. Cowlitz Street. Business meeting & program. Public iinvited. Info: 274.8149. THE PYTHIAN CASTLE 24 holds their meetings every 2nd and 4th Thursday @ 1 p.m. at the Castle Rock Womens Club, 206 Cowlitz St. West, Castle Rock. THE CASTLE ROCK LIONS CLUB meets the 1st & 3rd Thursdays at Hattie’s Restaurant @ 5:45 p.m. The club sponsors newspaper recycling. R Square D Square Dance Club: Sept - May. 2nd Fri & 4th Sat. 7:30 pm Plus, 8:00pm - 10:00pm Mainstream with Rounds. $5 admission Kelso Senior Ctr 636-1993

LONGVIEW MONTICELLO LIONS meets 6:30 p.m. 2nd and 4th Mondays, dinner and speaker at The Carriage Restaurant on 12th LONGVIEW EARLY BIRD LIONS meets at The Carriage Restaurant on the 1st Wednesday @6pm, 3rd Wednesday @6:45am. THE VADER LIONS CLUB meets the 1st Thursday @ 6 p.m. and the 3rd Thursday @ 7 p.m. at the club’s building on Hwy 506 in Vader for a potluck dinner and meeting. Info: 295-3087 or 295-3801. KALAMA LIONS CLUB - LONGVIEW PIONEER LIONS CLUB meets every Tuesday at noon at the Longview Eagles Club (152612th Ave) Provide humanitarian service to the citizens of the area, visitors are welcome. WINLOCK LIONS CLUB meets the 1st and 3rd Thursdays of each month at 12 p.m. at Guadalajara Restaurant, off SR 505. Visitors welcome. Call 7853744 info KELSO LIONS CLUB meets 1st & 3rd Monday @ 6:30 p.m. in Longview Kelso Kels Building. Call Richard (360)425-5876 ROSE VALLEY GRANGE #953 meets 2nd Tues. @ 1pm, & 4th Tuesdays @ 6 p.m. 1520 Rose Valley Road, Kelso. Info: Becky 575-3977 or Debbie 414-9627 COWLITZ COUNTY VETERANS ASSOC. meets the second Friday of each month. CALL 577-6757 for locations. LONGVIEW REBEKAH LODGE NO. 305 Meets the 1st and 3rd Saturday each month at the IOOF Hall, corner of Pacific and Pine, Kelso, 1 p.m.. Info: 1-866725-3507 CASTLE ROCK EAGLES, celebrating their 100th birthday, meets at the Eagles Aerie on Huntington Ave. @ 8 p.m. every 2nd & 4th Tuesday for the Aerie & Auxiliary. KELSO EAGLES meet 1st and 3rd Tuesday at 7 p.m. Aux., Aerie meets at 8 p.m. Initiation 3rd Tuesday. BINGO MonWed-Fri @ 6:30 p.m. Special Charity BINGO Monday 12 - 3 p.m. Call 425-8330 for info. CASTLE ROCK FREEMASONS 3rd Mon @ 7:30 p.m. at Lodge located on SW First Ave DAUGHTERS OF THE AMERICAN REVOLUTION, MaryRichardson Walker Chapter. rootsweb. FRIENDS OF CASTLE ROCK LIBRARY, 1st Mondays from 10 - 11 a.m., Library 137 Cowlitz St. West in Castle Rock WORSHIP & RECOVERY meeting, Sunday @ 1 p.m., refreshments. Positive faith group meeting. 1260 12th Ave., LV S.C.O.R.E. - Free counseling & guidance for small businesses by the nation-wide of S.C.O.R.E., Kelso/ Longview Chamber of Commerce, 1563 Olympia Way, Longview, WA. DISABLED AMERICAN VETERANS: 1st Fri of the month at 1 p.m. @ 1639 10th Ave. 577-5890, and Auxiliary meets the 2nd Friday of the month at 11 a.m. 423-3125 MT. ST. HELENS CLUB - meets 2x week to hike on a rural trail in SW Washington &/or NW Oregon.  Location and info: or 360- 673-2799 NATIONAL ASSOC. OF ACTIVE & RETIRED FEDERAL EMPLOYEES Longview - Kelso Chapter 1070, meet the 1st Wednesday @ 11:30 a.m. at the Monticello Hotel, Longview. Info: 423.6032. LOWER COLUMBIA WOODCARVERS Tues 5 - 7 p.m. & Thurs. 1 - 4 p.m . @ LV Senior Center 274-3175 LONGVIEW BORDER CROSSINGS Volks walking meet on 2nd Tuesdays at St. John’s Hospital, Longview, @ 6:30 p.m. Cafeteria Sam Korff 503-728-0400 KELSO ROTARY Meets Thursdays at 12 p.m. Lunch available to purchase. Kelso Longview Elks Lodge Call 414-5406 for more information ALTRUSA of Longview/Kelso meets Thursdays from 12 - 1 p.m.. 1st - Board; 2nd - Business; 3rd - Committee; 4th - Program; Lunch served for $5 at all meetings except Board. Meet at Altrusa room at CAP. THE SPIRIT OF FREEDOM Christian Intervention program for the chemically dependent, meets Wednesday 6 p.m. at Landmark United Pentecostal, 4333 Ocean Beach Hwy, 360-636-0580 LONGVIEW GARDEN CLUB meets at 10 a.m. the 4th Thurs. Jan. - November; Sept. - Oct. Due to holidays, Nov. & Dec. meetings are on the 3rd Thurs. Most mtngs Grace Lutheran Church in Longview. Info: 425-0755 COWLITZ BEEKEEPERS ASSOCIATION meets the 3rd Thursday each month, 7 p.m. @ 3 Rivers Bible Church 102 Harris Street, Kelso, 360-749-9040 OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS of Longview meets Thursday @ 5:30-6:30pm at 1414 12th Ave, Longview. Info: Gloria 360-749-7449 or NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) "Connections" Open Support Group Mondays @ 4-5:30pm & Thurs 12-1:30pm. Counseling avail. Call (360)703-6722 Kelso office: 109 Allen St, Kelso WA Kalamas GFWC AMALAK women's service club 1st & 3rd Thurs from Sept - May at Community Center, 216 Elm street in Kalama at 7:00 p.m. Call 360-901-1791 CASTLE ROCK TOPS # 0740 (Take Off Pounds Sensibly) meets Thursdays 9:30am, St. Paul's Lutheran Church, 312 First Ave. Darlene: 703-5042.

Abernathy Assembly of God 702 Abernathy Creek Rd. Longview Phone: 360-636-1620 Website: Sunday Service 10:45 AM Apostolic Lighthouse 803 Vandercook, Ste 12, Longview Bible Study Tues 7:30pm Church Service Sun 2:30pm Pastor Mozingo (360)219-6109 Apostolic Lutheran Church 248 Cowlitz St. W., Castle Rock Sunday School 10:15 a.m. Church at 11 a.m. Information Dave Kandoll 295-3461 First Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) 2000 East Kessler Blv - Longview 360.425.4220 Rev. Eric Atcheson Grace and Truth City Church 525 Third Ave SW – Castle Rock Pastor David Beer Worship 10:15am, 749-2289 Grace Bible Fellowship 300 S.10th Ave, Kelso Worship: Sunday 11:00am Bible Study 9:30 a.m. (360)423-4035

Baha’i Faith Vader 360-751-2181 Packwood 360-494-4767 Grace Lutheran Church, MS Longview 360-423-4105 2725 Dover Street, Longview Wednesdays 11:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. Worship: Sunday 10:30am Bethany Lutheran Church (360)414-4147 2900 Parkview Drive, Longview Office: (360)577-8240 Grace United Methodist Church, Pastor Julie Bracken Vader, 295.3402 Sunday Worship: 9:30 a.m. Rev. Steven A. Caskey, pastor Castle Rock Christian Church Sunday worship service – 12:15 p.m. 542 Huntington Ave. S, Castle R. Potluck every 2nd Sunday Quilting on Mondays & Thursdays Sunday school – 9 am (all ages) Sunday Worship – 10 am Dr. John Leffler, Senior Pastor Highland’s Baptist Church 6th-12th Gr. youth Wed, 6-7:30 pm 371 20th Avenue 425-1960 Longview 360-274-6771 M-F, 9:30a -1:30pm Sunday School 9:00am Call for home groups/studies Worship Service 11:00am Pastor Larry Pedigo 703-2117 Castle Rock Church of the Nazarene 456 Pioneer Ave. NE, Castle Rock Sunday School classes 9:30 a.m. Worship Celebration 10:45 a.m. Evening church service 6:30 p.m. Women’s Bible study Th 10:30am Rev. Reo McBride, 274.6546 Castle Rock First Baptist Church 211 Front Ave. NW, Castle Rock Pastor Joel Royce 274-4113 Sun Bible Study all ages: 9:45am Worship 11a.m. Women’s Bible Study: Wed 1:30pm Cowboy Church: Last Sat.; 3-6pm Castle Rock Church of Nazarene 456 Pioneer Ave NE, Castle Rock (360)274-6546 Pastor Reo McBride Sunday Service: 10:45am Sunday School: 9:30am Children’s Service: 11:00am Sunday Eve Service: 6:00pm Women’s Bible Study: Wed 6:00pm Castle Rock United Methodist 241 First Street, Castle Rock Sunday School 9:30 a.m. Worship 10:55 a.m. Sunday Youth Group: Sundays 2 p.m. Rev. Pam Brokaw - 274.4252 Central Christian Church 401 Crawford St., Kelso Worship -11am, school @ 9:30am Wednesdays @ 6pm (Youth @ 6:45 Bible Studies - many available Russ Tevis, Minister 360-425-3420 Church Office Community of Christ, Longview 202 Delaware Street Pastor Sharon West Classes all ages: 10:00am Worship Service: 11:00am Church of Christ 300 St. Helen’s St., Toledo, Wa Sunday Bible Class 10 a.m. Sunday Worship 11 a.m. & 6 p.m. John Gadberry, Minister 360-274-8570 Emmanuel Lutheran Church 2218 E. Kessler Blvd. - Longview Sunday Worship - 8:30am Sunday “Celebration” - 11 a.m. Thursday Worship - 6:30 p.m. Pastor David Martin, Senior Pastor Church office - 360-423-3250 Faith Fellowship Lutheran Brethren; Church 210 Fishers Lane, Kelso Pastor Chris Leingang Worship at 10:00am Church Office (360) 425-4390 Fathers House Church 1315 Commerce Ave, Longview Worship Sundays: 9am, 10:30am Pastor Chuck Tilton 423-7826 Fireside Fellowship 271 Atmore Road, Toutle Worship Sunday 10:00 a.m.

House of Prayer for All Nations 868 9th ave. Longview, WA Sunday School 9:45 AM Morning Service 11:15 AM Evening Service 6 PM Immaculate Heart of Mary Catholic Church 2200 Allen Street, Kelso (360) 423-3650 M & F Daily Mass 12:15 PM Sat Vigil Mass 5:30 PM Sunday Mass 10:30 AM Kalama Baptist Church, Pastor Wes Eader 112 Vincent Rd, Kalama WA 9:45am - Sunday School 11:00am - Worship Call 673-5570 Kelso First United Methodist Church 206 Cowlitz Way, Kelso Contemporary Service 9:00 am Sunday School 9:20 am Traditional Service 11:00 am Wed: Children (Grade 1-12) 5:30-7 pm Pastor Vonda McFadden 360-423-7480 Lexington Bible Fellowship 98 Garden Street, Kelso (Lexington) Sunday school @ 9:45am Sunday worship @ 11am Pastor Jerry Hancuff Life Center Corner of Rock & Pine in Centralia Sundays at 10:30am or Oyler Rd & Hwy 12 in Ethel Sundays 9:00am 360-736-5898

951 Delaware St., Longview Sundays 10am & 6pm Wednesdays 7pm 703-3340 Oak Point Community Church 445 Oakpoint Rd, Longview Sunday School 9:30 a.m. Sunday Service 11 a.m. & 6 p.m. Thursday Bible Study 7 p.m. Pastor Doug McMurray #577-6037

The Rock Meeting at 1955 Huntington Ave S, Castle Rock Worship 10 a.m. every Sunday Wednesday @ 7pm Service Pastors Jerry & Angie Hughes 274.7480 Rose Valley Friends Church 1437 Rose Valley Rd. Kelso 360-425-3222 Church Office 9:30am Sunday School Hour for all 10:45am Worship Service 5:00pm - 7:00pm Valley Youth Group 6-8pm Wednesday-JValley Youth 6-8pm -Sunday-JValley Youth Ryderwood Community Church,

315 Jackson St. PO Box 161, Ryderwood, Pastor Bill Bowlby, 360-295-3962 Service Opportunities 11 am Sunday

St. Mary Catholic Church 120 Powell Rd., Castle Rock 274.7404 W & Th Daily Mass 8:30A Sunday Mass 8:30A St. Matthew’s Episcopal Church 412 Pioneer Ave., Box 1467 Castle Rock Worship 10 a.m. Sunday - 274.9393 St. Paul Lutheran Church 312 First Ave. SW, PO Box 847, Castle Rock 274.6604 9 & 11am Sunday Worship. Adult Study & Sunday School 10:10am Tues 10:30am Text Study Wed: 5:30pm Youth Group Wed: 7:30pm Adult Bible Study Pastor Bob Sinclair St. Rose Catholic Church 2571 Nichols Blvd Longview, WA 360-425-4660 The Salvation Army Church 1639 10th Ave, Longview Sunday School @ 9:45am Holiness Meeting @ 11:00am 360-423-3992 St. Stephens Episcopal 1428 - 22nd, Longview WA Office: (360)423-5600 Sunday Worship: 8:00am & 10:00am Seventh Day Adventist Church 7531 Old Pacific Hwy -Castle Rock Worship 11 a.m. Saturday Pastor Ben Moore 274.6090

Seventh Day Adventist Church 77 Solomon Road, Kelso WA Office: (360)423-7344 Saturday Worship: 11:05am Pastor Marcia Stone Living Hope Church 2711 NW Andreson, Vancouver Stella Lutheran Chapel 11:00am Sundays 124 Sherman Road, Longview Pastor Dean Jenks (360)944-3905 Pastor Carol Plummer Sunday Worship 10:00 am Longview Church of Christ Office (360) 423-3795 (Wed. Only) 2219 50th Ave. Sunday Bible Class Toledo New Life Assembly of God 9:30, Sunday Worship 10:30 Pastor Larry Hartwick 420 Silver Street, Toledo 864-4366 Worship: Sun. @ 10am, Wed. @ 6pm Longview Church of the Nazarene Dinner on Wednesdays @ 5:15pm 814 - 15th Ave, Longview Food Bank: Last Tue/Wed of month Sunday Service 10:30 a.m. Sunday School 9:00 a.m. Toutle Christian Fellowship Celebrate Recovery Thurs at 6 p.m 5067 Spirit Lake Hwy – Toutle 360-577-1100 Worship Service Sunday 9 a.m. Pastor Denny Martinez Longview Community Church, 2323 Washington Way - Longview (360)274-6305 Contemporary Service 8:45 a.m. Sun. Vader Assembly of God Church Traditional Service 11 a.m. Sun. 302 - 6th St., Vader (360)295-3756 Pastor John Williams 423.6380 Pastor Tracy Durham Sunday Worship: 10:30am & 6:00pm Longview Presbyterian Church Wed. Adult Study, Kidz Church: 7p.m. 3808 Pennsylvania St., Longview Worship and Children’s Class: Valley View Church of God Sundays at 10am 1435 - 33rd Ave, Longview WA Pastors Dexter & Liz Kearny 577-8951 Pastor Dwayne Cothron (360)636-6787 Worship Sundays @ 10am & 6pm Longview Pentecostal Church 4333 OB Highway, 636-0580 Word of Life Christian Center Sunday School 11am, Worship 12pm 277 Brown Rd. E, Chehalis Bible Study Wed 7pm, Youth Fri. 7pm Sunday 9:45am / Wed 7pm Study Pastor Perry Hanchey 360-864-4407 / 360-523-8828 New and Living Way Church

November 2016 • Valley Bugler • Page 13

Movie Reviews By Blake Peterson

'Blue Jay' - a love story for today Directed by Alex Lehmann Starring Sarah Paulson, Mark Duplass Running Time 1 Hr., 20 Mins., NR My Rating: A-

Underappreciated is the kind of romantic movie in which the leading pair of love interests just talk. Nora Ephron and Rob Reiner are good and fine, (they’re definitive masters of the rom-com), but in my years of obsessive film watching I have found that nothing is more romantic to behold than voyeuristically watching as a connection between characters forms. Organically, no precious meet-cutes, no comedic misunderstandings and the like to deter the believability of the situation. Alex Lehmann’s “Blue Jay,” headed by the inimitable Sarah Paulson and the cultishly legendary Mark Duplass, is a romantic movie that reasons that beholding deep conversation is more carnal an action than anything sexy we’ve come to expect in the dependably rose-colored genre. In the film, Paulson (as Amanda) and Duplass (as Jim) are fortysomething high school sweethearts that reunite by chance at a grocery store on a lazy afternoon. In the two decades since their breakup, neither has fulfilled the middle-aged prophecies they envisioned for themselves. Amanda married up and is a stepmother to a trio of kids nearing high school graduation. While her life seems ideal, a vision of suburban perfection, she worries about what’ll happen when her nest is empty — she’s dissatisfied and isn’t so sure that she married her soulmate.   Jim, by contrast, is doing much worse. Abidingly on the verge of erupting into a fit of tears, he’s back in town to renovate the home of

his late mother. Additionally unemployed and feasibly aimless, all he has to look forward to during the work week is the building of houses with his businessman uncle. But it’s hardly his preferred line of work and he’s bothered by the fact that everything he’s come to understand about himself has all but shattered. Because Jim is immediately forthright with his emotions, whereas Amanda lets notions of domestic bliss circle around her before she can’t take it anymore, the film largely wallows in his unrequited longing; every smile and every laugh coated in a tangible melancholy, with every revelation a bruiser. When the last twenty minutes arrive and it’s divulged that Amanda, in fact, is not the unblemished woman she appears to be, and that the focal relationship is far more complex than meets the eye, “Blue Jay” metamorphoses from “Before Midnight’s” soul sister to a visceral slice-of-life. In store is not a romantic comedy with optimism peeking around every corner but a relationship drama coated in sorrow and desperation. It’s a masterstroke in empathetic filmmaking, with Duplass’s screenplay crucially naturalistic and Alex Lehmann’s direction appropriately tender. One false, clichéd move and “Blue Jay” wouldn’t work. It would become an interesting, but manipulative, experiment in its genre. But everything about it feels unpredictable and unnervingly genuine, undoubtedly a result of Lehmann’s handling of the material and the masterful performances on the part of the luminous Paulson and the surprisingly moving Duplass. As its languid eighty minutes breeze by, its black and white photog-

raphy enhancing its bittersweetness and its spotlessly placed instances of catharsis, “Blue Jay” proves itself to be among the most exciting independent films of 2016. It’s mumblecore all grown up, an epilogue to the sweeping days Generation X reveled in. You can forget about your Meg Ryans and your Tom Hanks’

different timezone. The state of Wisconsin had 38 time zones. We should be thankful, in this age of global communication in the blink of an eye, that we have a relatively standardized time zone rule to follow. Pacific Time, Central Time, Eastern Time, and Mountain Time. Mark it on your calendar, and if you're a church go-er or Sunday worker, be extra diligent about setting your clock the night before the 6th.'ll be early. ☺

A student at the University of Washington, Blake will major in Visual Communications or Journalism.

GET PUZZLED! 1) Thanksgiving occurs on the: a-Fourth Thursday in November b-Third Thursday in November c-November 26 each year 2) The first Thanksgiving lasted: a-One day b-Two days c-Three days 3) Which of the following was NOT served at the Pilgrims Thanksgiving meal? a-Cranberries, corn, and mashed potatoes b-Rabbit, chicken, wild turkey, and dried fruit c-Venison (deer meat), fish, goose 4) Which Indian tribe taught the Pilgrims how to cultivate the land and were invited to the Thanksgiving meal? a-Apache

Sudoku Answer on p. 15

Thanks to the Uniform Time Act of 1966, which standardized daylightsaving time for all states except Arizona and Hawaii, everyone's clocks will be "falling back" on Sunday, November 6th at 2am. Well, if you're like most other Americans, you'll be setting your clocks back before you hit the sack on Saturday, November 5th. Prior to this Act of 1966, states could choose what time it was, even different communities could have a

here: fakery is nonexistent in “Blue Jay,” and the experience of seeing of ourselves in Jim and Amanda only heightens its spellbinding hold over us.

b-Wampanoag c-Cherokee 5) Approximately how many turkeys are eaten each year on Thanksgiving in the United States? a-100 million b-280 million c-500 million 6) Which southern state was the first to adopt a Thanksgiving Day in 1855? a-South Carolina b-Virginia c-Georgia 7) What utensil was not used by the Pilgrims to eat Thanksgiving dinner? a-Knife b-Fork c-Spoon ANSWERS: a, c, a, b, b, b

Page 14 • Valley Bugler • November 2016

Enter Community Photography Show

How to Summit Everest

By Oscar Myre IV Valley Bugler Columnist Each year I look forward to the annual Tough Mudder in Seattle (Black Diamond). The Tough Mudder is a super fun 10+ mile obstacle course and mud run. This year was no different, my team and I were looking forward to getting dirty. What was different was that my Dad and I had a singular goal. We wanted to do whatever it would take to get every man to the top of Everest. For those new to the Tough Mudder, Everest is the iconic 15’ wall. It is essentially a 1/4 pipe skateboard ramp that you get to run up. The Seattle version has a left and a right side. On the left, the Legionnaires (people that have completed Multiple Mudders) have an opportunity to tackle a part of the wall that is about 4 feet taller. (Been there done that) The right side is the original 15’ wall. The wall is similar to the American Ninja Warrior Warp Wall, but the Tough Mudder event is fundamentally different than American Ninja Warrior. Where Ninja is an individual race, the Mudder can best be appreciated by reading the pledge. As a Tough Mudder I Pledge That… I understand that the Tough Mudder is not a race but a challenge. I put teamwork and camaraderie before my course time. I do not whine - kids whine. I help my fellow Mudders complete the course.

I overcome all fears. Ok, Tough Mudder is also different in that it is outside and as the name indicates it is very muddy. It also has an obstacle call Electorshock Therapy where you get shocked by live wires, another obstacle called Arctic Enema where you are fully submerged in an ice bath and don’t forget the King of the Swing where you swing out over water and reach to ring a bell before the inevitable fall into the water some 15 feet below. These are just a few of the 20+ obstacles you get to endure (enjoy). Ok back to our team on the Everest Wall. How do you make sure everyone on your team gets over the wall? You build a pyramid. 3 of us laid on at the base of the wall, 2 more guys stood on our shoulders and we had one of our team members climb the pyramid. We also had one our guys and some others at the top of the wall to help pull up the guy on the top of the pyramid. As he approached the summit, I climbed up a rope and used my feet to help him order the last bit. Ok, I don’t think I helped, but it was fun to watch my buddy as he overcame this obstacle. Some guys used our pyramid, others ran up to the arms of guys hanging from the top. But, all of us made it! Tough Mudder asks a powerful question. “When was the last time you did something for the first time?” For many on our team, the Mudder itself was a first time and for the rest of us, it was the first time we made sure everyone overcame the wall. I encourage you to tackle some obstacles and ask, “When is the last time that you did something for the first time? Mud on. Happy Birthday to Oscar Myre IV, the head web developer at RAM Mounts in Seattle. Oscar enjoys playing outside with his kiddos and doing crazy events like the Tough Mudder.

Longview Recreation and the Monticello Camera Club invite all interested photographers to enter their photographs in the upcoming Photo Contest and Show to be held on November 4, 5 & 6 at the McClelland Center, 951 Delaware Street, Longview WA. Photographers of all ages are welcome to participate. Students, ages 18 and under, will be professionally judged separately. 2 adult divisions include amateur and advanced photographers. Ribbons and prize gift certificates will be awarded. Categories include: Still life, plant life, creative, scenic, people, animals, creative, general interest and City of Longview Parks. Photos must be entered on Sunday, October 30th from 2:00pm to 5:00pm, and Tuesday, November 1st from 4:00pm - 7:00pm, at McClelland Center. Photos can be entered digitally or in print. Prints must be mounted, ready to hang and no smaller than 5x7 and not larger than 16x20. String must be attached and framed art is not accepted. For more information on submitting digital photos check

out the web site: Digital entries may be emailed to Entry fees for adults are $6 for each image, or $20 for 5 images, youth entry fee is $3 for each print. There is a limit of 5 entries per category. The awards reception will be on Friday, November 4th from 7 to 8:30 pm. Public viewing is also on Saturday, November 5th from 11 a.m. to 4 pm and on Sunday, November 6th from 1 to 4 pm. There is no charge for the public viewing. For more information, please contact Longview Recreation at 442.5400.

[Photos: Top photo was taken at a Pumpkin Patch, featuring Oscar Myre V. Bottom photo: Beautiful Lopez Island sunset on Fisherman's Bay. Photos by Michelle Myre. ©2016]

'Sometimes I do get to places just when God's ready to have somebody click the shutter.' ~Ansel Adams

November 2016 • Valley Bugler • Page 15

How can human food harm our pets? We're all guilty of it - giving in to those big begging eyes pleading at us for a scrap from the table during dinner. Fido knows just how to get you to concede, and most of us justify that a little won't hurt, or we don't even think of the potential danger at all. But the truth is that human food can be harmful to your pet, and in some cases, can be fatal. It's important to know how certain foods can be unsafe so that you can avoid them for the sake of your animal. Here is how a few of some of the most common "human foods" become harmful for pets: Chocolate, Caffeinated foods Caffeine is one of the greatest culprits because it contains an alkaloid called theobromine. Theobromine acts as a cardiac stimulant and a diuretic, which in turn can cause a heart attack or other heart and nervous system problems in animals. Onions and Garlic Onions and garlic are potentially harmful due to the fact that both contain thiosulphate, which can damage red blood cells and cause anemia in cats and dogs. Of the two, onions are the most toxic, as consumption of simply one serving by your pet could result in anemia. Milk Milk can harm your pet due to the fact that many dogs and cats tend to be lactose intolerant. The consumption of milk and milk products by a lactose intolerant pet creates a breeding ground for bacteria, causing vomiting and diarrhea. Bones Bones, although commonly known

as a great treat for your dog, are potentially very dangerous for pets. Once eaten, bones can splinter and get stuck in the intestines, causing damage or fatality. In most splinter cases, the bones must be removed surgically. Other Foods Other human foods to avoid when feeding your pet are: macadamia nuts, potato peelings and greenlooking potatoes, rhubarb leaves, moldy/ spoiled foods, alcohol, yeast dough, tomato leaves and stems, broccoli, and raisins or grapes. Some human foods potentially cause only mild digestive upsets, while others can be fatal. Regardless of the level of danger, the best choice for your pet is to keep him from any potentially harmful foods in order to ensure his health and safety. During the holiday season, veterinary clinics have noticed a rising in the number of pets that they treat for food-related illnesses. The increase in pet illness is due to the fact that animals are partaking in human foods during mealtime. Although not well known by the public, the consumption of human food to pets is potentially harmful to animals, and in some instances, can be fatal. The rise in food-related illnesses by pets is a clear indication that the dangers of human food consumption by animals are not understood by the masses. So, the next time your pet looks up at you with those pleading eyes, show him you care by doing what is truly best for him and feeding him only products meant for pet consumption. In the end, both you and your pet will be glad that you did.

Stunt Dog Experience Friday, November 11th 7:30pm Columbia Theater Chris Perondi's 'Stunt Dog Experience' comes to the Columbia Theater this Veteran's Day evening, with $2.50 of every ticket being donated to local rescue organization, Rescued Paws! 'SDE' showcases rescue dogs in an interactive, high-energy, family show. The audience - young and old

Sudoku Answer from p. 13

- participate while these incredible dogs perform amazing athletic feats. You'll love the dancing dogs, big air stunts and the "Stunt Dog Triathlon". Don't forget to linger in the lobby after the show for a chance to meet (and pet) the stars of the show. Tickets: $20.00-$30.00 Call 360.575.8499 or online

Adorable Adoptee

Meet 'Porcha' Porcha was abandoned, left to fend for herself. She arrived in rescue extremely scared and covered in fleas, to the point that her skin was bleeding. That was about a month ago. The difference in this dog is amazing. Her skin has almost cleared up, and she is learning to interact with other dogs, without fear. The vet thinks she is about 3 years old. She is now spayed and current on her vaccinations. Porcha is housetrained, knows "sit", "come" and "shake". She is an active dog and will need lots of exer-

cise with active kids and people. She is currently in foster care with farm animals, and she loves herding the goats. She has done well here with all the dogs in our foster care, however, when she gets nervous, she chatters and becomes submissive. For more information about Porcha, please contact: For more information about available adoptees, please contact Rescued Paws: Rescued Paws: (360)673-7373

‘The difference between friends and pets is that friends we allow into our company, pets we allow into our solitude.’ ~Robert Brault Come see our special dogs and cats today. Humane Society of Cowlitz County.

Call 577-0151

Page 16 • Valley Bugler • November 2016

Valley Bugler November 2016  

Give thanks with a grateful heart.

Valley Bugler November 2016  

Give thanks with a grateful heart.