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Page 2 • Valley Bugler • December 2016

From the Editor’s Desk One of my favorite songs of the Christmas season is 'O Holy Night'. For years, I have performed this on stage, singing my heart out to the One who made the Holy night happen. Another of my favorite contenders is an older song that was recently revived by the group, Pentatonix. If you haven't heard this a capella singing group, you MUST visit YouTube right now and look them up. Their Christmas album is absolutely stunning. Gorgeous, thick chords, and tight harmonies, with a fantastic rhythmic vocal. The solos are moving, especially in the favorite song I am talking about, 'Mary Did You Know'. This song takes the view of the virgin birth from the perspective of looking at Mary. A young girl, probably about age 14 or 15, now married to Joseph, probably a few years older, and living her life as a married woman, and mother to the Son of God. The lyrics to this song are striking: 'Mary did you know that your baby boy will one day walk on water? Mary did you know that your baby boy will save our sons and daughters? Did you know that your baby boy has come to make you new? This child that you've delivered, will soon deliver you.... Powerful. I wonder. Did Mary know? We aren't shown that side of her in scripture. She was visited by the angel, Gabriel, and told she would bear the son of God, and He would be called Jesus. Can you imagine?

First of all, an angel of the Lord appearing before you might be slightly overwhelming, and then the angel telling you that you're going to have a baby that is the Son of God? The Bible records Mary's response in Luke, Chapter 1. I encourage you to find this answer that Mary gives the angel, and reflect upon what this humble fourteen year old responded. Mary did you know that your baby boy will give sight to a blind man? Mary did you know that your baby boy will calm a storm with his hand? Did you know that your baby boy has walked where angels trod? And when you kiss your little baby, you have kissed the face of God? Mary did you know, Mary did you know, Mary did you know? The blind will see, the deaf will hear and the dead will live again The lame will leap, the dumb will speak, the praises of the lamb! Mary did you know that your baby boy is Lord of all creation? Mary did you know that your baby boy will one day rule the nations? Did you know that your baby boy is heaven's perfect Lamb? This sleeping child you're holding is the great I am? Mary did you know, Mary did you know, Mary did you know.... For me, the song brings this extraordinary experience of Mary to life. As a mother, I can feel the emotion contained in these words. Jesus was Mary's little boy, but ultimately the Son of God. She nursed him at her breast, comforted him when he skinned his knee, cheered and encouraged him

Publication Information Valley Bugler, LLC

Longview, WA (360)414-1246 eMail:

Editor/Publisher....................... Michelle Myre Web Manager ........................ Oscar Myre IV Cover Design ........................ Oscar Myre IV, Michelle Myre Distribution ............................. Diana Jones Advertising Sales................... Michelle Myre Columnists............................... Listed below Blake Peterson - Movie Reviews Georgia Butterfield - Adorable Adoptee Georgia Cox - Castle Rock Seniors Oscar Myre IV - Geek Speak Pat Nelson - Windows on Woodland Paddy Burrow - Fruits & Nuts /valleybuglernewspaper PeaceHealth - Living Well **The Valley Bugler newspaper publishes content supplied from the above columnists, and is not responsible for factual mistakes or anything other than the occasional spelling error. The Valley Bugler does not endorse views expressed, but retains a neutral stance on all advertisements, issues and articles printed, unless otherwise stated.**


on in his young years, and was the one person who encouraged him in his first miracle of turning water into wine. My heart swells at the thought of what Mary had encountered. In her humble response to the Lord's request of her to bring forth the Savior of the world. Overwhelming. There is no debate that Jesus walked this earth. His name is recorded in historical transcripts, and the historical accuracy of the Bible only solidify this fact. So, it is the question of whether or not, you, the reader, knows. Do you

know? That this baby boy is Lord of all creation? Do you know? The sleeping child Mary held, is the great 'I am'? Do you know, that this baby born, so long ago, has come to make you new? Hard questions for some. I wonder and celebrate at the awesome majesty and miracle that His birth brought our world. Merry Christmas!

Michelle Myre Publisher / Editor

December Events

The Kelso Longview Chamber of Commerce is proud to present the annual Jingle Bell Run! On the eve of Saturday, December 10th the streets of historic Downtown Longview will be filled with festive, holly jolly citizens embracing the holiday spirit by running and walking in the Jingle All the Way 5k: Run/Walk. Located at the intersection of Commerce and Broadway, doors open at 3:30pm where you can take pictures with Santa, and other Holiday Visitors, as pictured here. The Costume Contest begins at 4:30pm. The Jingle All the Way raises money for the Kelso Longview Chamber’s Lower Columbia Professionals Scholarship Fund, which benefits local high school graduates on their journey through college. Festive holiday attire is encouraged for this event, as prizes will be awarded to best individual and group costumes, as well as medallions for

December 2016 • Valley Bugler • Page 3

Christmas Tree Lightings & Parades

Friday, December 2nd: City of Kelso Tree Lighting Festivities @ 5:30pm-8pm. There will be food, music and children’s crafts to ring in the Christmas Season! Head to the Train Depot in Kelso, WA for the Holiday fun and to experience the delightful Christmas light displays.

Saturday, December 3rd: Parade Day Festival in Downtown Longview and Tree Lighting Ceremony at Civic Circle Park. Tons to do for the whole family in Downtown Longview on Parade Day, December 3rd! Starting at 12pm and lasting until right before the big Parade at 5pm, there will be: Longview’s Gingerbread Haus Contest, Gift Bazaars, Pedicab Rides, Live music, and of course delicious treats from local restaurants. In Downtown, at The Broadway Gallery, the annual Gingerbread Haus contest will be on display from Noon 5pm, where you can see all the houses and sweet creations. Then, at 5pm, The Parade will begin!

top 3 female and and male finishers. Registration Deadline for shirts ($25, $65 Family of 4 includes shirts) is December 1st, and Registration (no-shirt) $20 avail through race day. Race-Day registration is available. Questions, call the Kelso Longview Chamber of Commerce: 423-8400. Special thanks to our Main Event Sponsors: Kapstone, My Agency and Fibre Federal Credit Union. Their support, along with all of the other Sponsors, helped the Elf Committee make this family fun run come to life!

Winding around Downtown, this cheery and flashy parade will finish at the Civic Circle in front of the Monticello Hotel, with the arrival of the famous big guy himself, Santa Claus and his lovely wife, Mrs. Claus. Once the switch is flipped, and the entire Civic Circle is lit up by beautiful lights, little boys and girls can sit on Santa’s lap to tell him their special Christmas wish. Sunday, December 4th: City of Rainier, Oregon Annual Christmas Tree Lighting 5pm - 7pm The City of Rainier and the Rainier Chamber of Commerce proudly present the Annual Festival of Lights, a Tree Lighting Celebration on Sunday, December 4th @ Rainier City Hall. (106 West ‘B’ Street, Rainier OR.) Caroling starts at 5:00pm on the City Hall stairs, doorprizes, Hot Cocoa and See CHRISTMAS, continued on p.5

The Nutcracker opens Dec. 15th Experience the magic of the season with the Nutcracker, as performed by the esteemed Southwest Washington Dance Ensemble. Presenting their 21st Annual production of this beloved holiday classic at the state of the art Corbet Theatre, Centralia College. "Pay What You Can" Show is on Dec. 15th @ 6:00pm. Tickets are now available online or at the Corbet Theatre box office from 1:00pm - 8:00pm. For tickets or more information visit online:

Page 4 • Valley Bugler • December 2016



Q: What do elves learn in school? A: The Elf-abet! Q: What’s the most popular wine at Christmas? A: “I don’t like peas”! Q: If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? A: Missletoe! Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? A: Frostbite. Q: Where do polar bears vote? A: The North Poll. Q: What do you get when you cross an archer with a gift-wrapper? A: Ribbon hood. Q: Why do birds fly south for the winter ? A: Because it’s too far to walk. Q: What was wrong with the boy’s brand new toy electric train set he received for Christmas? A: Forty feet of track - all straight! Q: What kind of bird can write? A: A PENguin. Q: What do you call a cat on the beach at Christmas time? A: Sandy Claus! Q: How do sheep in Mexico say Merry Christmas? A: Fleece Navidad! Q: What nationality is Santa Claus? A: North Polish. Q: Why does Santa’s sled get such good mileage? A: Because it has long-distance runners on each side. Q: What do you call a bunch of grandmasters of chess bragging

about their games in a hotel lobby? A: Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer! Q: What do you get if you deep fry Santa Claus? A: Crisp Cringle. Q: What did the ghosts say to Santa Claus? A: We’ll have a boo Christmas without you. Q: What did Santa shout to his toys on Christmas Eve? A: Okay everyone, sack time!! Q: What do snowmen eat for breakfast? A: Snowflakes. Q: Why did the elf push his bed into the fireplace? A: He wanted to sleep like a log. Q: Why did Santa spell Christmas N-O-E? A: Because the angel had said, “No L!” Q: What goes Ho, Ho, Swoosh, Ho, Ho, Swoosh? A: Santa caught in a revolving door! Q: Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on Christmas Eve? A: Because it “ soots “ him! A: Its true . . . Comet cleans sinks! Q: What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? A: Claustrophobic. Q: Why does Scrooge love Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer? A: Because every buck is dear to him. Q: What do you call a kid who doesn't believe in Santa? A: A rebel without a Claus.

‘Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful.’ ~Norman Vincent Peale


Lighter side ☺

4 HUSBANDS The local news station was interviewing an 90-year-old lady because she had just gotten married for the fourth time. The interviewer asked her questions about her life, about what it felt like to be marrying again at 90, and then about her new husband's occupation. "He's a funeral director," she answered. "Interesting," the newsman thought. He then asked her if she wouldn't mind telling him a little about her first three husbands and what they did for a living. She paused for a few moments, needing time to reflect on all those years. After a short time, a smile came to her face and she answered proudly, explaining that she had first married a banker when she was in her 20's, then a circus ringmaster when in her 40's, and a preacher when in her 60's, and now in her 90's - a funeral director. The interviewer looked at her, quite astonished, and asked why she had married four men with such diverse careers. (Wait for it....) She smiled and explained, "I married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go." DEAR JOHN LETTER Dear John, I have been unable to sleep since I broke off our engagement. Won't you forgive and forget? Your absence is breaking my heart. I was a fool, nobody can take your place. All my love, Belinda. xxxxoooxxxx P.S. Congratulations on winning last week's Powerball lottery. PASSWORD In my job with a credit union, I often run across accounts that are protected by password. The credit-union member, when withdrawing funds, must produce identification and then give the password to the teller. Recently, when I asked a woman for her password, she sighed, rolled her eyes and replied, "Save." I was puzzled until she explained, "My husband put in that password so

I'd have to say it every time I make a withdrawal." FAST PROPOSAL At a country-club party a young man was introduced to an attractive girl. Immediately he began paying her court and flattering her outrageously. The girl liked the young man, but she was taken a bit aback by his fast and ardent pitch. She was amazed when after 30 minutes he seriously proposed marriage. "Look," she said. "We only met a half hour ago. How?can you be so sure? We know nothing about each other." "You're wrong," the young man declared. "For the past 5 years I've been working in the bank where your father has his accounts." STORM An Ensign was sitting his first qualification board for Officer of the Deck at sea. After several hours of watching the young officer answer difficult questions from the members of the board, the ship's Captain decided to finish off the board by placing the Ensign in a completely hypothetical emergency situation. "What would you do if a sudden storm sprang up on the starboard side?" he asked. "Throw out an anchor, Sir," the Ensign replied. "And what would you do if another storm sprang up aft?" "I'd throw out another anchor, Captain." "And if another terrific storm sprang up forward, what would you do then?" asked the Captain. "Throw out another anchor, Sir," the Ensign said. "Hold on," said the Captain. "Where are you getting all those anchors from?" The Ensign smiled. "From the same place you're getting all those storms, Sir." Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage? Answer: They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.

December 2016 • Valley Bugler • Page 5

CHRISTMAS, cont. from p.3

Saturday, December 10th: New date this year! Breakfast with Santa! Join Santa and Mrs. Claus for this popular family tradition. Tickets will sell out quick for the annual Breakfast with Santa on Sat, Dec. 10th at the McClelland Center, 951 Delaware St. Longview. Choose from two times at 8:30am (#152858) or 10:45am (#152859). This traditional family event includes breakfast; crafts, Santa, Mrs. Claus, face painting and Penny’s Puppets from Portland will lead a fun holiday sing-a-long and puppet show. A Winter time treat for the whole family! Each child goes home with a gift. Tickets are $9.00 per person. No tickets sold at the door, pre-registration required. Photos with Santa are available for $5. Register online at or call 442-5400. Saturday, December 10th Castle Rock Festival of Lights. The Castle Rock Community invites you to come experience the joy of the season in downtown Castle Rock, complete with parade and Christmas lights. Free pictures with Santa at 3:30pm in the Women's Pavilion, and the Parade festivities begin at 5:30pm. See complete article on p.6 for all the family fun details! Saturday, December 10th Centralia Lighted Tractor Parade At 6pm on the 10th, bring the family out for an evening of lights, music and tractors! The Centralia Downtown Association presents the 2016 Centralia Lighted Tractor Parade.

Bundle up and wrap your hands around a cup of hot cocoa, this parade is a holiday event you don't want to miss out on. More than 10,000 people annually pack the streets of downtown Centralia to enjoy the festivities, marvel at the lights and enjoy the ambience of a small-town downtown Christmas! Stick around after the last float passes to check them all out as they circle around Washington Park. Don't forget to check out the downtown merchants while you are there, before the parade. This is the very first year of the Centralia Christmas Market. Many local craft vendors selling handmade items and more. Also, many merchants, especially restaurants, remain open during and after the parade! Saturday, December 10th Christmas in the Mountains Grab the family if you want to do something different this year, and head out Hwy 12 to Morton, WA. This annual event brought to you by the Fire Mountain Arts Council celebrates 'Christmas in the Mountains', East Lewis County's premier community Christmas event in Morton, WA. The Roxy Theater can be found at 233 W Main St, Morton, WA 98356. The Festival of Trees are on display at the Tiller Art Center, and starts at 10am, as well as the Santa visit at the Roxy. Hayrides take off from the Roxy Theater from 10am - 12pm, The Story of the Nutcracker is from 2-4pm, cookies and cocoa will be served until 5:00, and a Living Nativity will be seen at 6 p.m. 10am–6pm: Festival of Trees at the Tiller Arts Center 10am–12pm: Santa at Tiller Art Center & Hayrides at Roxy 2-4pm: Story of the Nutcracker at the Roxy 6pm: Living Nativity at the Roxy

‘Walk ‘N Knock’ Food Drive set for December 3rd The Pioneer Lions annual Walk ‘n Knock Food Drive for the entire Cowlitz County area is set on the calendar for Saturday December 3rd, 2016. Volunteers are needed to help pick up the grocery sacks filled with donations of canned fruit, vegetables, fish, soup, pasta and pasta sauce, hot and cold cereal, dia-

pers, toothbrushes and toiletries to be donated to the local CAP Warehouse for needy families. Check with your local Pioneer Lions organization or Chamber of Commerce for ways to volunteer. See page 12 for listings of Lions organizations and their contact information.

Veterans Quilt Project Open House The Veterans Quilt Project will be celebrating their 10th anniversary with an Open House at St Urban Grange in Winlock on Thursday, December 1 from 10am-3pm. Everyone is invited to join the quilters, view a few of the quilts and share in some cake and coffee. The group of volunteers makes throw-size patriotic quilts for the Veterans Hospital in Vancouver, Washington. Lap quilts are also made for the Veterans Clinic in Chehalis and the Veterans Hospital at American Lake. In addition to the quilts, over 300 Christmas stockings are made each year and distributed to Vancouver, American Lake and the Chehalis

Clinic. The stockings are filled with a handkerchief, notepad, pen, deck of cards, chap stick, lifesaver roll and candy cane. Depending on various donations from different groups and individuals, the stocking may also include combs, toothbrushes, socks, nail clippers or other small items. The quilt project started as a request to Chris Schaefer of Winlock from the 40 et 8 Voiture 99 of Vancouver, WA in December 2006. The group currently meets monthly at the St Urban Grange in Winlock on the 1st and 3rd Thursday. If you have any questions regarding the project, please contact Chris at 785-3366.

Festive Peppermint Twists

en to workable consistency.) Heat Cookie Icing following label directions. Squeeze snow and garlands on trees; add sprinkles and sugars as desired. Let dry.

Dark Cocoa, Light Cocoa, Candy Melts Candy, Peppermint Twisted Sticks, Holiday Sprinkles, including Holiday Nonpareils, Confetti, Red and Green Colored Sugars Line cookie sheets with parchment paper. In disposable dipping container or bowl, separately melt Candy Melts in microwave following package instructions. Dip peppermint sticks into melted candy; tap stick lightly to smooth surface. Immediately add sprinkles. Set on prepared cookie sheet; chill until set, 5 to 10 minutes. Cheery Cereal Tree Treats

Makes about 12 treats 1/4 cup (1/2 stick) butter/margarine 4 cups mini marshmallows Juniper or Leaf Green Icing Color 6 cups crisp rice cereal White Cookie Icing Jumbo Rainbow Nonpareils, Sprinkles, Sugars Prepare 3D Tree Mold, spatula or wooden spoon with vegetable pan spray. In large saucepan, melt butter. Add marshmallows; cook and stir until melted. Tint with icing color. Remove from heat and add cereal; mix well. Press into prepared mold. When cool to touch, remove from mold. (If mixture becomes hard to work with, microwave at 50 percent power for 30 to 60 seconds to soft-

Page 6 • Valley Bugler • December 2016

Join in the Fun at the 7th Annual Castle Rock Festival of Lights • Dec.10th ‘Twas the month before Christmas, and all through the town, the lights were all hung from rooftop to ground.' Sasquatch, Santa, and the town of Castle Rock would like to invite you to enjoy the 7th annual Castle Rock Festival of Lights, and continue the tradition of a Truly Unique Northwest Christmas! Come out on Saturday, December 10th to enjoy free pictures with Santa starting at 3:30pm at the Women’s Pavilion. Little munchkins, young and old, can meet and sit on Santa's lap to share their Christmas wishes. The hometown holiday parade gets underway at

Submitted by Georgia Cox DECEMBER Events Every Monday: Our delectable Cinnamon Rolls and coffee will be served to the public from 10am to NOON. Suggested donation is only $1.50 for these delicious concessions. A great way to start your week! Every Monday, Wednesday & Friday: Get that heart rate up and get healthy with the exercise classes from 9:30am to 10:30am! Every 1st and 3rd Tuesday: Write Your Life Story group will meet in the Center from 1pm-3pm. Every Tuesday: Games, cards and visiting from 12pm-3pm. All are welcome to this leisurely time. Every Wednesday: CAP offers Nutrition Meals for Seniors at the

Center at NOON. Suggested donation is $3.00, PLEASE call #6362118 (by Monday) for reservations. Pape Tole classes are offered from 1pm - 3pm. Every Thursday: Quilting projects will take place from 12pm to 3pm and fun Pinochle games are played in the Center later at 7pm and is open to all who are interested! Every Friday: Lunches by reservation only, will be served in the Center at NOON. Must Reserve by calling 636-2118 by Monday. Every Saturday: BINGO! games will be played from 1pm - 3pm. Please come and join in for a fun afternoon. SPECIAL EVENTS: Tuesday, December 13th: Special Christmas music Program pre-

5:30pm, with the annual tree lighting ceremony and caroling to follow. The tree lighting display, and parade lights are sure to bring out your holly jolly self, as you rub elbows with other fellow community members and join your voices in song. Santa will stick around until 7:30pm for more pictures, and will have a sweet treat for all the good little girls and boys. The magic of the Castle Rock Festival of Lights is truly in the old fashioned, hometown feel of the festival, and the glittering lights hung with care throughout the town. If you are looking for a place to recapture the magic of what Christmas used to feel like, this is certainly the place for you. If you picked up this issue in time, and you’d like to do some ahead-oftime shopping, support small businesses and local venders, hitch up

sentation by the Castle Rock High School Choir at 11am, followed by a potluck lunch at noon. Please join us for this delightful time of holiday music and fellowship. At 1pm, following the Music Program, we will have our raffle drawing for a beautiful quilt and several other items. Thursday, December 15th: Commodities will be distributed from 10am - 1pm. Have a valid punch card. *Please watch the reader board for holiday announcements The Center will be closed 12/2426 for the Christmas Holiday. Castle Rock Senior Center 222 - 2nd Ave Castle Rock, WA 98611 (360)274-7502

the sleigh and head to Castle Rock for two holiday bazaars on Saturday, November 26. Bazaars will be open from 10am to 4pm. Several local businesses will also be offering Small Business Saturday deals, and a stamp card game with great prizes. Bazaars will be held at Parker’s Restaurant, and at the old Exhibit Hall at 147 Front Ave NW. To you and yours from everyone at the Castle Rock Festival of Lights, may you have yourself a very merry Christmas! For more information and a complete schedule of events, please visit the Castle Rock Festival of Lights on Facebook at:

[Photo at left: The Castle Rock Annual Festival of Lights festivties, captured by Melody Kranz, Storytelling Photography.]

"The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear!" - Buddy, the elf

December 2016 • Valley Bugler • Page 7

Please enjoy this extensive and hopefully comprehensive list of bazaars (up to date when published), and keep it handy throughout the month. Feel free to visit our FaceBook page and post your Bazaar information if you were not able to get it into us on time.

Saturday, November 26th: Small Business Saturday Sale The Merk, 1330 Commerce, Lgvw November 26th, 10am - 4pm Featuring handcrafted items, local area businesses, direct sales, and nonprofits. Benefits local charity.

Thursday, December 1st: Artisan Guild of Mt St Helens Bazaar Cassava's on 14th & Broadway, LV December 1st & 2nd, 9am-6pm Creative gifts, stained glass, photography, jewelry, handmade dog Christmas stockings, and cat/dog treats sold to benefit Humane Society

Friday, December 2nd Pleasant Hill Grange Bazaar 4741 Pleasant Hill Rd, Kelso December 2nd, 10am-4pm December 3rd, 10am-4pm Benefits Community House, Salvation Army, and Humane Society

Fifth Annual Holiday Bazaar Sunny Meadows Community Center 4400 OB Hwy, Longview WA 9am-5pm; 12/2-3, 12/8-10, 12/15-17 Benefits Military Care Packages

Saturday, December 3rd A Walk in the Park Holiday Bazaar Prestige Monticello Park 605 Broadway, Longview WA December 3rd, 9am - 3pm Benefits Salvation Army Christmas Bazaar Longview First Church of God 2335 46th Ave, Longview WA December 3rd, 9am - 3pm Community Hospice Bazaar 1035 - 11th Ave, Longview WA December 3rd, 9am - 3pm Handcrafted items, Benefits Community Home, Health & Hospice Handcrafted Holiday Bazaar McClelland Arts Center 951 Delaware, Longview WA December 3rd, 10am - 3pm Home-made & handcrafted items. Fifth Annual Holiday Bazaar Sunny Meadows Community Center

How does Santa get down the chimney? For parents of today’s smart little kids, it’s a vexing problem to explain how Santa can get himself (and their gifts) down the chimney. It’s a little easier to explain his flight path, but the chimney problem is a practical matter. How can he land on the roof, scramble down the chimney, stuff stockings and leave toys, all in a flash of time?

Maybe he’s just a showoff. What else could you expect from a guy who can fly around the world and make his deliveries in just one night.

‘Our hearts grow tender with childhood memories and love of kindred, and we are better throughout the year for having, in spirit, become a child again at Christmas-time.' - Laura Ingalls Wilder

4400 OB Hwy, Longview WA 9am - 5pm; 12/3, 12/8-10, 12/15-17 Benefits Military Care Packages Highlands Baptist Church Bazaar 317 20th Ave, Longview WA December 3rd, 9am - 3pm Benefits holiday food baskets Toledo Elementary Holiday Bazaar 311 Sixth St, Toledo WA December 3rd, 9am - 3pm Benefits Toledo Senior Center Kelso Eagles Christmas Bazaar 609 S. Pacific, Kelso WA December 3rd, 9am - 5pm December 4th, 9am - 4pm Benefits Eagles Charities; Breakfast and Lunch available for purchase Pleasant Hill Grange Bazaar See info on Friday, Dec. 2nd St. Mary's Christmas Bazaar 120 Powell Rd, Castle Rock WA December 3rd, 9am - 4pm Benefits Church + Hospice; Soup, rolls, pie and coffee available

Saturday, December 10th Columbia Heights Assembly of God Christmas Bazaar 3609 Col. Hts Rd, Longview WA December 10th, 9am - 3pm Benefits Celebrate Recovery Fifth Annual Holiday Bazaar See info on Friday, Dec. 2nd Toutle Country Christmas Bazaar Toutle Lake School 5050 Spirit Lake Hwy, Toutle December 10th, 9am - 5pm Breakfast & Lunch avail for $$; benefit Toutle VFW and Toutle Lake Girl Scouts; tables call 360-431-9802

Sunday, December 11th Longview Country Club Holiday Brunch & Bazaar 41 Country Club Dr, Longview WA December 11th, 10am - 1pm Benefits charities; Food available

Sunday, December 4th Kelso Eagles Christmas Bazaar See info on Saturday, Dec. 3rd

Some modern thinkers claim he has discovered the secrets of miniaturization. But kids find it hard to understand how he can make himself really small. Scientists at the North Pole are working on the technology so it could be easier next year. If there’s no chimney, Santa could walk right in the front door, but then there’s the problem of getting down from the roof and back up there again. Fortunately, the rules of Christ-

mas Eve dictate that kids have to be asleep when Santa comes. If their parents are finished putting toys together, they will be asleep too. So no one will ever know for sure how he really does it... One thing is certain, he certainly deserves his milk and cookies. Or Starbucks latte and Caramel spiced coffee cake. So be sure to put them out, and don’t forget to leave carrots for his reindeer. Rudolph will appreciate that. Share this article at!

Page 8 • Valley Bugler • December 2016

Saving Goodwill By Paddy Elkins Valley Bugler Columnist

'Tis the season for peace on earth and goodwill towards men. And speaking of goodwill, I would like to dedicate my December column to the wonderful Goodwill organization, because Jobs Change Lives", and that's what our local Goodwill Store is all about! Did you know that Goodwill offers free job training & GED classes to At-Risk Youth, Displaced Homemakers, Veterans returning to the workforce, Senior Citizens and to other segments of the population? That's right! When you shop at Goodwill, the profits benefit the community at large, and when you "Round-Up" and donate your change to Goodwill, that money goes directly to our local Vocational Services Program situated on the "training" side of the Goodwill building, located at 1030 15th Ave, Suite 300, in Longview. There, great teachers like Bill Carnahan, teach computer lab classes to people that are job searching and Senior Citizens like me. Yes, I took his class last year and learned so much!

I can't say enough good things about it. Thanks to Mr. Carnahan's patience, I learned Microsoft Word 2010; Excel 2010; Outlook 2010; Power Point 2010; Internet E-mail; Internet Software & Windows File Management. Recently, Goodwill lost some key funding, and had to cut some classes from their program. Let's support our local Goodwill Store this Christmas by donating household goods, clothing, shoes, accessories and furniture to them, and by purchasing new and "gently used" items from Goodwill for stocking stuffers and gifts for family & friends. And then by "rounding UP!" Each month, you can get the Goodwill Store Calendar, which highlights 50%-off days; 25%-off days; Yellow tag sales; Pink tag sales; Orange tag sales; Student Discount Days; Senior Discount Days; Military Discount Days, etc. It's a perfect way to help others while helping yourself to huge savings and great fun at the same time.

Merry Christmas, Friends! And remember - Jesus is the Reason for the Season, so take time to consider the important things in life, this month, remembering the important things in life aren't "things", but people! So why not bless some people by donating some things you don't need any more to Goodwill? The person who benefits most might just be your-

self. Your closets and drawers will be emptier, and you'll have more room in them to put away all your Goodwill purchases when you get back home. Merry Christmas!!! Paddy Elkins invites your feedback! You may Email her at: or call her at 360-751-5231.

‘It is Christmas in the heart that puts Christmas in the air’. - W.T. Ellis

The Holidays and Grief Overcoming the pain and loss of a loved one, either to death or the death of a relationship, can be extremely traumatic. Especially when presented with the times of the year that are notorious for celebrating "with loved ones". So how on earth is anyone expected to cope on these special occasions without that special someone? For many, myself included, this is one of the hardest aspects of grieving. When you have lost someone immensely important and special in your life, for me it was my mom, the ability to celebrate almost anything flies out the window. Holidays

only magnify the loss, and can often present traumatic anxiety and deepened grief and sadness. The need for support is often times greatest during the holidays an dspecial occasions celebrated with the missing cherished one. Pretending that this isn't the case, or that you aren't hurting just isn't true for you. It isn't a sign of weakness to share that your grief is more acute during holiday celebrations. It is a sign of loving. Lean into the grief as you make it through this holiday season - and you will. There are many beautiful ways to incorporate and remember your departed loved one and your loss into the holidays, which will, in turn, help you process through this year's experience. Which is, undoubtedly different than before. Maybe it has been years, or only a few months. * Say a special prayer before the dinner about your loved one * Share online about them and their traditions they brought to your holidays * Have everyone tell or share a funny or special story about your loved one * Light a candle for your loved one * Place a special flower (their favorite?) at the Holiday dinner table in their memory Of course, there are other ways to cope. Develop a Plan B. If Plan A is to go over to Christmas dinner at Bob's house, then make a Plan B. If things don't feel right, then have Plan B ready to go into motion, such as a movie or special book. Cancel the holiday. Yes, you can. Not forever, but just for this year if you are feeling nothing. Many people find the Holiday routine as a comfort, and that life continues. Create new traditions. The traditions that you once held with your loved one may not be able to continue in their absence, and that's okay. Build on some new traditions, with their memory as the base. My family is still limping our way through life and the holidays without mom. We've started a few new traditions to cope. I've learned to give myself grace. To be gentle with myself and allow time for the feelings, of joy and deep sadness in remembrance. Try the holidays in a new way, living one day at a time, and allowing yourself to remember and cherish.

December 2016 • Valley Bugler • Page 9

Stille Nacht - Silent Night By Dick Smolinski Father Joseph Mohr sat at the old organ. His fingers stretched over the keys, forming the notes of a chord. He took a deep breath and pressed down. Nothing. He lifted his fingers and tried again. Silence echoed through the church. Father Joseph shook his head. It was no use. The pipes were rusted, the bellows mildewed. The organ had been wheezing and growing quieter for months, and Father Joseph had been hoping it would hold together until the organ builder arrived to repair it in the spring. But now, on December 23, 1818, the organ had finally given out. St. Nicholas Church would have no music for Christmas. Father Joseph sighed. Maybe a brisk walk would make him feel better. He pulled on his overcoat and stepped out into the night. His white breath puffed out before him. Moonlight sparkled off the snow-crusted trees and houses in the village of Oberndorf. Father Joseph crunched through the snowy streets to the edge of the little Austrian town and climbed the path leading up the mountain. From high above Oberndorf, Father Joseph watched the Salzach River ripple past St. Nicholas Church. In the spring, when melting snow flowed down the mountains and the river swelled in its banks, water lapped at the foundation of the church. It was moisture from the flooding river that had caused the organ to mildew and rust. Father Joseph looked out over the Austrian Alps. Stars shone above in the still and silent night. Silent night? Father Joseph stopped. Of course! “Silent Night!” He had written a poem a few years before, when he had first become a priest, and he had titled it “Silent Night.” Father Joseph scrambled down the mountain. Suddenly he knew how to bring music to the church. The next morning, Father Joseph set out on another walk. This time he carried his poem. And this time he knew exactly where he was going -- to see his friend Franz Grüber, the organist for St. Nicholas, in the next village. Franz Grüber was surprised to see the priest so far from home on Christmas Eve, and even more surprised when Father Joseph handed him the poem. That night Father Joseph and Franz Grüber stood at the altar of St. Nicholas Church. Father Joseph held his guitar. He could see members of the congregation giving each other puzzled looks. They had never heard a guitar played in church before, and certainly not during midnight mass on Christmas Eve, the holiest night of the year. Father Joseph picked out a few notes on the guitar, and he and Franz Grüber began to sing. Their two voices rang out, joined by the church choir on the chorus. Franz Grüber's melody matched the simplicity and honesty of Father Joseph’s words.

When the last notes faded into the night, the congregation remained still for a moment, then began to clap their hands. Applause filled the church. Father Joseph’s plan to bring music to St. Nicholas Church had worked. A few months later, the organ builder arrived in Oberndorf and found the words and music to “Silent Night” lying on the organ. The song enchanted him, and when he left, he took a copy of it with him. The organ builder gave the song to two families of traveling singers who lived near his home. The traveling singers performed “Silent Night” in concerts all over Europe, and soon the song spread throughout the world. Today, cathedral choirs and carolers from New York to New Zealand sing the simple song that was first played in a mountain church in Austria on Christmas Eve nearly 200 years ago.

(Photo above is an 1800's Austrian Jacobus Jany Classical Guitar; below is St. Nicholas Church in Oberndorf, Austria)

The history of the candy cane There is much controversy over the beginnings of this humble confection. Was it started with a German Choirmaster in 1670? Or did an Indiana candy maker create them in the mid 1920's? Contrary to popular belief, candy canes, or sweet sticks of hard candy, have been around for over 250 years. The Christmas Candy Cane originated in Germany around the early 1800's, and had their start as straight, white, sugar sticks. Every child's dream. Sometime around 1900 the red stripes were added, along with peppermint and wintergreen flavoring. As with many symbols, the candy cane can be used as a teaching example for Christian beliefs. The "J" can mean Jesus, as well as

represent the staff of the shepherds watching their flocks by night. The white of the cane can represent the purity of Jesus Christ, and the red stripes for the blood he shed on the cross. Going a step further, even the peppermint could represent the hyssop plant, used for purification in the Bible. As history would have it, around 1920, Bob McCormack from Georgia, started making canes for his friends and family. They became quickly popular, and McCormack started up the Bob's Candies company. McCormack's brother in law, Gregory Keller, a Catholic priest, invented the Keller Machine that automatically made straight candy sticks into curved ones, giving us today's candy cane!

Page 10 • Valley Bugler • December 2016

By Pat Nelson Valley Bugler Columnist Twenty-five years ago, my husband, Bob, and I became friends with Ramon and Rafaela Hernandez and their family when we visited Puerto Vallarta, Mexico. It all started when I wasn’t sure how to get back to our rented vacation villa, and 8-year-old Liliana Hernandez pointed the way. That led to meeting Liliana’s family, and we formed a lasting friendship. When Liliana became a teenager, her parents suggested that we take their daughter to Woodland for a school year. We thought that would

be a good opportunity for Liliana. Shortly before the 1998 school year, my husband and I had completed the necessary paperwork for the Woodland School District, but we still needed to have a visa approved for Liliana to visit the U.S. I flew to Puerto Vallarta, not knowing whether or not I would return to Woodland with a high-school student. Liliana and I traveled by bus with her father, Ramon, to Guadalajara during the night so that we would be at the visa office when it opened at 6 a.m. After a long wait, we were interviewed, but her visa was not approved. We were told

we would be called again later in the day. Around 4 p.m., all of the other applicants had been processed. We were the only people left in the waiting area. Finally, we were called. I was asked, “Why do you want this girl to go to the United States to live with you?” I replied, “She has been a friend for eight years. I want her to learn English well so that when she returns to Mexico, she can get a good job.” After waiting all day, the officer stamped the paperwork and we returned to Vallarta to prepare for Liliana’s trip to Woodland and the beginning of her junior year of high school. When Liliana returned home from Woodland, her new English-language skills paid off with a job at a tourist shop in Puerto Vallarta. And eight years ago, she landed her career job. Today, Liliana manages an upscale 5-bedroom, 9000 sq. ft. villa, Casa Abrayo. The villa manager needed someone she could count on, someone who spoke both Spanish and English. She needed someone who could live at the villa and work independently to care for it, and she hired Liliana. When asked if she thought it helped

her to go to school in Woodland, Liliana replied, “Thanks to that, I have a good job and a good salary. I am responsible for the villa in Nuevo Vallarta. I live there and take care of the villa for the owners and guests. It can be a big job when I have 10 guests, keeping the house clean and organizing breakfast, lunch and dinner, but it is worth it because when we have guests, I get to learn and practice more English.” Pictured at left, working at Casa Abrayo, Liliana has been able to save money and buy a house, which she rents out. She would like to visit Woodland again in the future, but right now, she’s so busy working for her boss, both at Casa Abrayo and on other jobs, that she has little free time. She still calls me her second mom and Woodland her second home, and one day when she’s not so busy, she will return “home” for a visit. Pat Nelson, is co-creator of three humorous and sometimes edgy anthologies: ‘Not Your Mother’s Book: On Being a Parent’ ( & retailers); On Being a Grandparent; and On Working for a Living.

You can give without loving, but you can never love without giving. ~Author Unknown

Hanukkah oil & wine: 'Remembering Judith'

Hanukkah, the festival celebrating Jewish religious freedom and miracles, starts on the 25th day of the Jewish month of Kislev and is celebrated for eight days and nights. This length symbolizes and represents the miracle of the oil, where the lamp was kept burning for eight nights, with only enough oil for one. Hanukkah is not to be confused or considered as "Jewish Christmas", but a celebration of miracles and freedom. This year, Hanukkah began at sun-

down on December 24th, coinciding with the Christian religious holiday of Christmas Eve, and ends January 1st, 2017. Hanukkah embraces many traditions and one of them centers on foods that are eaten during the celebration. Foods cooked in oil and dairy products, especially cheese, are served most often. The foods cooked in oil are in re-

December 2016 • Valley Bugler • Page 11 membrance of the miracle of the oil that burned for eight days during the purification of the Temple in Jerusalem. Latkes and sufganiyot (a jelly doughnut cooked in oil, pictured above) are the most popular of the Hanukkah foods. Latkes are often served interchangeably with potato pancakes, but they can also be made from ingredients such as corn, zucchini, and cheese. These may be accompanied by applesauce or sour cream. Some say eating the foods cooked in oil has something in common with reading the Torah. Oil can illuminate a room and reading the Torah illumi-

nates God’s words to us. The eating of dairy products is done in honor of the memory of Judith who saved the city of Bethulia by feeding the attacking Syrian general Holofernes wine and cheese until he fell into a drunken stupor. Then Judith took the general’s sword and killed him. When the Syrians discovered his body, they fled. Remembering Judith. Visiting a few Jewish sites online such as or brought up delightfully easy "Chanukah" or Hanukkah recipes. and AllRecipes. com also have lots of Hanukkah recipes available to try.


Page 12 • Valley Bugler • December 2016

KIWANIS CLUBS focus their community service hours to the welfare of children. CATHLAMET 1st Tues. 6 p.m. at the St. Catherine’s Catholic Church; 3rd Tues. at Sugar Lillies at noon. CHEHALIS - Thursday 12 p.m. at “The Restaurant” in Sunbirds. CLATSKANIE - 1st & 3rd & 5th Tues 6 p.m. at Fultano’s; 2nd & 4th Tues 12 p.m. Colvin’s. KELSO - Thurs. noon at 3 Rivers Mall, Comm. Room. LONGVIEW - Thursdays. noon at JT’s. SCAPPOOSE- 1st & 3rd Wednesday 6:30 p.m. Windemere Real Estate Office) ST. HELENS - Thurs. noon at the Elks Lodge (350 Belton Rd, St Helens). ST. HELENS DAYBREAKERS - Tues 7 a.m. at Warren Country Inn, Last Tues 6pm Columbia Soil and Water District Office AMERICAN LEGION GLEN HOYER POST 175 meets in Castle Rock every 1st & 3rd Tuesdays, 7:30 p.m. For info call 423.9542. The LADIES AUXILIARY to Glen Hoyer Post #175 of the American Legion meets first Thursdays. For info call 423-9542. AMERICAN LEGION GUY RATHBUN Post #25 meets the 2nd Thurs. of the month at 7 p.m @ Kelso Eagles For info Kandi 423.2504 BUFORD ROCKAFELLOW POST 101, The American Legion, and Auxiliary meets the 2nd Friday of each month at the Winlock Community Building. Potluck 6 p.m., meeting at 7 p.m.. For info Post Commander Wendy Carolan 360-785-0929 or Adjutant Phil Carolan at (360) 785-0929. The FLEET RESERVE ASSOCIATION (FRA) Naval Service Veterans, Navy, Marine Corps, Coast Guard. Lower Columbia Branch 363 meets 6:30 p.m., 2nd Friday, Longview VFW building, 4311 Ocean Beach Highway. Information: Ray Hegr (360) 425-6981 FLEET RESERVE AUXILIARY #363 meets the 2nd Friday of the month at the VFW Hall, 4311 Ocean Beach Hwy, Longview. Potluck 6:30 p.m. meeting 7:30 p.m. Active, retired, or reserve status family members with the US Navy, Marines, Coast Guard. Info 425.4688. KOREAN WAR VETS ASSOCIATION CHAPTER #321 of SW WA meets the 3rd Wednesday of each month @ 10am; Vancouver WA. Call Commander James Mead (360)907-0592 for information. KELSO-LONGVIEW ELKS LODGE #1482 meets Thurs at 7:30 p.m. for our members only. Dinner is served before Lodge at 5:30 p.m. Lunches are served Monday-Friday 11 a.m.-2 p.m. 900 Ash St., Kelso. 360.425.1482. TOUTLE VALLEY VFW POST & AUXILIARY #10882 meets the 1st Tuesday @ 7 p.m. at their Post Home, 101 Hansen Road in Toutle. For more information, contact John at 274.4350 or Nikki at 274.5263. TOLEDO VFW 3429, Reg. Meeting 1st Monday, Potluck at noon, meeting at 1 p.m. COWLITZ VALLEY VFW POST 1045, Tues. Bingo @ 6 p.m., 5 p.m. dinner; Auxilary mtngs at 11 a.m. every 2nd Wednesday. Breakfast for veterans served 1st Sat. of each month $6 each from 9 - 11 a.m. The COWLITZ VALLEY VFW LADIES AUXILIARY POST #1045 meets the 2nd Wednesday at 11 a.m. at the VFW Hall located at 4311 Ocean Beach Hwy, Longview. For info or questions please call Ruby at (360) 577-0414 or Jeannette at (360) 414-4053. COWLITZ PRAIRIE GRANGE #737 meets 2nd Wednesdays 6:30pm potluck, 4th Wednesdays 7:30pm dessert. 5180 Jackson Hwy, Toledo, WA 864-2023 SUNNYSIDE GRANGE #129 meets the 1st & 3rd Thursdays. 6:30 for potluck, 7:30 meeting. Call 274.6013 for information & rental hall. SILVER LAKE GRANGE 2nd and 4th Thurs. Potluck 6:30, meeting at 7:30 p.m. Info Anita Morgan 748-8098, Rentals call Claudia Hunter 274-5263 CATLIN GRANGE #199 2nd & 4th Fri. 6:30 p.m. Potluck dinner 2nd Friday. 7:30 meetings. More info: 423-2122; Rental call Barbara Wilburn: 425-5970. PLEASANT HILL GRANGE # 101 2nd Monday. 6:30 p.m. Potluck, meeting @ 7:15 p.m. Community Service group meets Thursdays @ 10am. Info & rentals call Zula Bryan 360-425-6101 ROSE VALLEY GRANGE #953 2nd Tuesday, 1 p.m. 4th Tuesday, 6pm. Info & Hall Rental: Becky Molt 360431-3175 WOODLAND GRANGE #178 2nd & 4th Thursdays 6:30 p.m. Potluck, meeting @ 7:15 p.m. Info & rentals call John Burke 225-9888 CASTLE ROCK WOMANS CLUB meets every 2nd Monday at 1 p.m. 206 W. Cowlitz Street. Business meeting & program. Public iinvited. Info: 274.8149. THE PYTHIAN CASTLE 24 holds their meetings every 2nd and 4th Thursday @ 1 p.m. at the Castle Rock Womens Club, 206 Cowlitz St. West, Castle Rock. THE CASTLE ROCK LIONS CLUB meets the 1st & 3rd Thursdays at Hattie’s Restaurant @ 5:45 p.m. The club sponsors newspaper recycling. R Square D Square Dance Club: Sept - May. 2nd Fri & 4th Sat. 7:30 pm Plus, 8:00pm - 10:00pm Mainstream with Rounds. $5 admission Kelso Senior Ctr 636-1993

LONGVIEW MONTICELLO LIONS meets 6:30 p.m. 2nd and 4th Mondays, dinner and speaker at The Carriage Restaurant on 12th LONGVIEW EARLY BIRD LIONS meets at The Carriage Restaurant on the 1st Wednesday @6pm, 3rd Wednesday @6:45am. THE VADER LIONS CLUB meets the 1st Thursday @ 6 p.m. and the 3rd Thursday @ 7 p.m. at the club’s building on Hwy 506 in Vader for a potluck dinner and meeting. Info: 295-3087 or 295-3801. KALAMA LIONS CLUB - LONGVIEW PIONEER LIONS CLUB meets every Tuesday at noon at the Longview Eagles Club (152612th Ave) Provide humanitarian service to the citizens of the area, visitors are welcome. WINLOCK LIONS CLUB meets the 1st and 3rd Thursdays of each month at 12 p.m. at Guadalajara Restaurant, off SR 505. Visitors welcome. Call 7853744 info KELSO LIONS CLUB meets 1st & 3rd Monday @ 6:30 p.m. in Longview Kelso Kels Building. Call Richard (360)425-5876 ROSE VALLEY GRANGE #953 meets 2nd Tues. @ 1pm, & 4th Tuesdays @ 6 p.m. 1520 Rose Valley Road, Kelso. Info: Becky 575-3977 or Debbie 414-9627 COWLITZ COUNTY VETERANS ASSOC. meets the second Friday of each month. CALL 577-6757 for locations. LONGVIEW REBEKAH LODGE NO. 305 Meets the 1st and 3rd Saturday each month at the IOOF Hall, corner of Pacific and Pine, Kelso, 1 p.m.. Info: 1-866725-3507 CASTLE ROCK EAGLES, celebrating their 100th birthday, meets at the Eagles Aerie on Huntington Ave. @ 8 p.m. every 2nd & 4th Tuesday for the Aerie & Auxiliary. KELSO EAGLES meet 1st and 3rd Tuesday at 7 p.m. Aux., Aerie meets at 8 p.m. Initiation 3rd Tuesday. BINGO MonWed-Fri @ 6:30 p.m. Special Charity BINGO Monday 12 - 3 p.m. Call 425-8330 for info. CASTLE ROCK FREEMASONS 3rd Mon @ 7:30 p.m. at Lodge located on SW First Ave DAUGHTERS OF THE AMERICAN REVOLUTION, MaryRichardson Walker Chapter. rootsweb. FRIENDS OF CASTLE ROCK LIBRARY, 1st Mondays from 10 - 11 a.m., Library 137 Cowlitz St. West in Castle Rock WORSHIP & RECOVERY meeting, Sunday @ 1 p.m., refreshments. Positive faith group meeting. 1260 12th Ave., LV S.C.O.R.E. - Free counseling & guidance for small businesses by the nation-wide of S.C.O.R.E., Kelso/ Longview Chamber of Commerce, 1563 Olympia Way, Longview, WA. DISABLED AMERICAN VETERANS: 1st Fri of the month at 1 p.m. @ 1639 10th Ave. 577-5890, and Auxiliary meets the 2nd Friday of the month at 11 a.m. 423-3125 MT. ST. HELENS CLUB - meets 2x week to hike on a rural trail in SW Washington &/or NW Oregon.  Location and info: or 360- 673-2799 NATIONAL ASSOC. OF ACTIVE & RETIRED FEDERAL EMPLOYEES Longview - Kelso Chapter 1070, meet the 1st Wednesday @ 11:30 a.m. at the Monticello Hotel, Longview. Info: 423.6032. LOWER COLUMBIA WOODCARVERS Tues 5 - 7 p.m. & Thurs. 1 - 4 p.m . @ LV Senior Center 274-3175 LONGVIEW BORDER CROSSINGS Volks walking meet on 2nd Tuesdays at St. John’s Hospital, Longview, @ 6:30 p.m. Cafeteria Sam Korff 503-728-0400 KELSO ROTARY Meets Thursdays at 12 p.m. Lunch available to purchase. Kelso Longview Elks Lodge Call 414-5406 for more information ALTRUSA of Longview/Kelso meets Thursdays from 12 - 1 p.m.. 1st - Board; 2nd - Business; 3rd - Committee; 4th - Program; Lunch served for $5 at all meetings except Board. Meet at Altrusa room at CAP. THE SPIRIT OF FREEDOM Christian Intervention program for the chemically dependent, meets Wednesday 6 p.m. at Landmark United Pentecostal, 4333 Ocean Beach Hwy, 360-636-0580 LONGVIEW GARDEN CLUB meets at 10 a.m. the 4th Thurs. Jan. - November; Sept. - Oct. Due to holidays, Nov. & Dec. meetings are on the 3rd Thurs. Most mtngs Grace Lutheran Church in Longview. Info: 425-0755 COWLITZ BEEKEEPERS ASSOCIATION meets the 3rd Thursday each month, 7 p.m. @ 3 Rivers Bible Church 102 Harris Street, Kelso, 360-749-9040 OVEREATERS ANONYMOUS of Longview meets Thursday @ 5:30-6:30pm at 1414 12th Ave, Longview. Info: Gloria 360-749-7449 or NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) "Connections" Open Support Group Mondays @ 4-5:30pm & Thurs 12-1:30pm. Counseling avail. Call (360)703-6722 Kelso office: 109 Allen St, Kelso WA Kalamas GFWC AMALAK women's service club 1st & 3rd Thurs from Sept - May at Community Center, 216 Elm street in Kalama at 7:00 p.m. Call 360-901-1791 CASTLE ROCK TOPS # 0740 (Take Off Pounds Sensibly) meets Thursdays 9:30am, St. Paul's Lutheran Church, 312 First Ave. Darlene: 703-5042.

Abernathy Assembly of God 702 Abernathy Creek Rd. Longview Phone: 360-636-1620 Website: Sunday Service 10:45 AM Apostolic Lighthouse 803 Vandercook, Ste 12, Longview Bible Study Tues 7:30pm Church Service Sun 2:30pm Pastor Mozingo (360)219-6109 Apostolic Lutheran Church 248 Cowlitz St. W., Castle Rock Sunday School 10:15 a.m. Church at 11 a.m. Information Dave Kandoll 295-3461 First Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) 2000 East Kessler Blv - Longview 360.425.4220 Rev. Eric Atcheson Grace and Truth City Church 525 Third Ave SW – Castle Rock Pastor David Beer Worship 10:15am, 749-2289 Grace Bible Fellowship 300 S.10th Ave, Kelso Worship: Sunday 11:00am Bible Study 9:30 a.m. (360)423-4035

Baha’i Faith Vader 360-751-2181 Packwood 360-494-4767 Grace Lutheran Church, MS Longview 360-423-4105 2725 Dover Street, Longview Wednesdays 11:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. Worship: Sunday 10:30am Bethany Lutheran Church (360)414-4147 2900 Parkview Drive, Longview Office: (360)577-8240 Grace United Methodist Church, Pastor Julie Bracken Vader, 295.3402 Sunday Worship: 9:30 a.m. Rev. Steven A. Caskey, pastor Castle Rock Christian Church Sunday worship service – 12:15 p.m. 542 Huntington Ave. S, Castle R. Potluck every 2nd Sunday Quilting on Mondays & Thursdays Sunday school – 9 am (all ages) Sunday Worship – 10 am Dr. John Leffler, Senior Pastor Highland’s Baptist Church 6th-12th Gr. youth Wed, 6-7:30 pm 371 20th Avenue 425-1960 Longview 360-274-6771 M-F, 9:30a -1:30pm Sunday School 9:00am Call for home groups/studies Worship Service 11:00am Pastor Larry Pedigo 703-2117 Castle Rock Church of the Nazarene 456 Pioneer Ave. NE, Castle Rock Sunday School classes 9:30 a.m. Worship Celebration 10:45 a.m. Evening church service 6:30 p.m. Women’s Bible study Th 10:30am Rev. Reo McBride, 274.6546 Castle Rock First Baptist Church 211 Front Ave. NW, Castle Rock Pastor Joel Royce 274-4113 Sun Bible Study all ages: 9:45am Worship 11a.m. Women’s Bible Study: Wed 1:30pm Cowboy Church: Last Sat.; 3-6pm Castle Rock Church of Nazarene 456 Pioneer Ave NE, Castle Rock (360)274-6546 Pastor Reo McBride Sunday Service: 10:45am Sunday School: 9:30am Children’s Service: 11:00am Sunday Eve Service: 6:00pm Women’s Bible Study: Wed 6:00pm Castle Rock United Methodist 241 First Street, Castle Rock Sunday School 9:30 a.m. Worship 10:55 a.m. Sunday Youth Group: Sundays 2 p.m. Rev. Pam Brokaw - 274.4252 Central Christian Church 401 Crawford St., Kelso Worship -11am, school @ 9:30am Wednesdays @ 6pm (Youth @ 6:45 Bible Studies - many available Russ Tevis, Minister 360-425-3420 Church Office Community of Christ, Longview 202 Delaware Street Pastor Sharon West Classes all ages: 10:00am Worship Service: 11:00am Church of Christ 300 St. Helen’s St., Toledo, Wa Sunday Bible Class 10 a.m. Sunday Worship 11 a.m. & 6 p.m. John Gadberry, Minister 360-274-8570 Emmanuel Lutheran Church 2218 E. Kessler Blvd. - Longview Sunday Worship - 8:30am Sunday “Celebration” - 11 a.m. Thursday Worship - 6:30 p.m. Pastor David Martin, Senior Pastor Church office - 360-423-3250 Faith Fellowship Lutheran Brethren; Church 210 Fishers Lane, Kelso Pastor Chris Leingang Worship at 10:00am Church Office (360) 425-4390 Fathers House Church 1315 Commerce Ave, Longview Worship Sundays: 9am, 10:30am Pastor Chuck Tilton 423-7826 Fireside Fellowship 271 Atmore Road, Toutle Worship Sunday 10:00 a.m.

House of Prayer for All Nations 868 9th ave. Longview, WA Sunday School 9:45 AM Morning Service 11:15 AM Evening Service 6 PM Immaculate Heart of Mary Catholic Church 2200 Allen Street, Kelso (360) 423-3650 M & F Daily Mass 12:15 PM Sat Vigil Mass 5:30 PM Sunday Mass 10:30 AM Kalama Baptist Church, Pastor Wes Eader 112 Vincent Rd, Kalama WA 9:45am - Sunday School 11:00am - Worship Call 673-5570 Kelso First United Methodist Church 206 Cowlitz Way, Kelso Contemporary Service 9:00 am Sunday School 9:20 am Traditional Service 11:00 am Wed: Children (Grade 1-12) 5:30-7 pm Pastor Vonda McFadden 360-423-7480 Lexington Bible Fellowship 98 Garden Street, Kelso (Lexington) Sunday school @ 9:45am Sunday worship @ 11am Pastor Jerry Hancuff Life Center Corner of Rock & Pine in Centralia Sundays at 10:30am or Oyler Rd & Hwy 12 in Ethel Sundays 9:00am 360-736-5898

951 Delaware St., Longview Sundays 10am & 6pm Wednesdays 7pm 703-3340 Oak Point Community Church 445 Oakpoint Rd, Longview Sunday School 9:30 a.m. Sunday Service 11 a.m. & 6 p.m. Thursday Bible Study 7 p.m. Pastor Doug McMurray #577-6037

The Rock Meeting at 1955 Huntington Ave S, Castle Rock Worship 10 a.m. every Sunday Wednesday @ 7pm Service Pastors Jerry & Angie Hughes 274.7480 Rose Valley Friends Church 1437 Rose Valley Rd. Kelso 360-425-3222 Church Office 9:30am Sunday School Hour for all 10:45am Worship Service 5:00pm - 7:00pm Valley Youth Group 6-8pm Wednesday-JValley Youth 6-8pm -Sunday-JValley Youth Ryderwood Community Church,

315 Jackson St. PO Box 161, Ryderwood, Pastor Bill Bowlby, 360-295-3962 Service Opportunities 11 am Sunday

St. Mary Catholic Church 120 Powell Rd., Castle Rock 274.7404 W & Th Daily Mass 8:30A Sunday Mass 8:30A St. Matthew’s Episcopal Church 412 Pioneer Ave., Box 1467 Castle Rock Worship 10 a.m. Sunday - 274.9393 St. Paul Lutheran Church 312 First Ave. SW, PO Box 847, Castle Rock 274.6604 9 & 11am Sunday Worship. Adult Study & Sunday School 10:10am Tues 10:30am Text Study Wed: 5:30pm Youth Group Wed: 7:30pm Adult Bible Study Pastor Bob Sinclair St. Rose Catholic Church 2571 Nichols Blvd Longview, WA 360-425-4660 The Salvation Army Church 1639 10th Ave, Longview Sunday School @ 9:45am Holiness Meeting @ 11:00am 360-423-3992 St. Stephens Episcopal 1428 - 22nd, Longview WA Office: (360)423-5600 Sunday Worship: 8:00am & 10:00am Seventh Day Adventist Church 7531 Old Pacific Hwy -Castle Rock Worship 11 a.m. Saturday Pastor Ben Moore 274.6090

Seventh Day Adventist Church 77 Solomon Road, Kelso WA Office: (360)423-7344 Saturday Worship: 11:05am Pastor Marcia Stone Living Hope Church 2711 NW Andreson, Vancouver Stella Lutheran Chapel 11:00am Sundays 124 Sherman Road, Longview Pastor Dean Jenks (360)944-3905 Pastor Carol Plummer Sunday Worship 10:00 am Longview Church of Christ Office (360) 423-3795 (Wed. Only) 2219 50th Ave. Sunday Bible Class Toledo New Life Assembly of God 9:30, Sunday Worship 10:30 Pastor Larry Hartwick 420 Silver Street, Toledo 864-4366 Worship: Sun. @ 10am, Wed. @ 6pm Longview Church of the Nazarene Dinner on Wednesdays @ 5:15pm 814 - 15th Ave, Longview Food Bank: Last Tue/Wed of month Sunday Service 10:30 a.m. Sunday School 9:00 a.m. Toutle Christian Fellowship Celebrate Recovery Thurs at 6 p.m 5067 Spirit Lake Hwy – Toutle 360-577-1100 Worship Service Sunday 10 a.m. Pastor Adam VanGorp Longview Community Church, 2323 Washington Way - Longview (360)274-6305 Contemporary Service 8:45 a.m. Sun. Vader Assembly of God Church Traditional Service 11 a.m. Sun. 302 - 6th St., Vader (360)295-3756 Pastor John Williams 423.6380 Pastor Tracy Durham Sunday Worship: 10:30am & 6:00pm Longview Presbyterian Church Wed. Adult Study, Kidz Church: 7p.m. 3808 Pennsylvania St., Longview Worship and Children’s Class: Valley View Church of God Sundays at 10am 1435 - 33rd Ave, Longview WA Pastors Dexter & Liz Kearny 577-8951 Pastor Dwayne Cothron (360)636-6787 Worship Sundays @ 10am & 6pm Longview Pentecostal Church 4333 OB Highway, 636-0580 Word of Life Christian Center Sunday School 11am, Worship 12pm 277 Brown Rd. E, Chehalis Bible Study Wed 7pm, Youth Fri. 7pm Sunday 9:45am / Wed 7pm Study Pastor Perry Hanchey 360-864-4407 / 360-523-8828 New and Living Way Church

December 2016 • Valley Bugler • Page 13

Movie Reviews By Blake Peterson

'Love and Friendship' Directed by Whit Stillman Starring Kate Beckinsale, Chloë Sevigny Running Time 1 Hr., 34 Mins., PG My Rating: B+

I like period pieces about as much as a redneck likes a chilled glass of rosé (insufferable is the frequently too impeccable mounting of posh costumery and mannered dialogue) but Whit Stillman’s Love & Friendship, adapted from Jane Austen’s unfinished novella Lady Susan, makes for a different case. A romantic comedy so decadently witty it’d potentially more closely resemble a Luis Buñuel helmed comedy of manners if it weren’t so decked out in 18th century era spunk, we tend to forget its setting guided limitations and see it as a perfectly modern work to be relished. After coming back from a thirteen year absence from filmmaking with 2011’s amiable (if forgettable) Damsels in Distress, 2016’s Love & Friendship finds Stillman (Metropolitan, Barcelona) roaring back to the top of the indie food chain. As it goes for period pieces aplenty, we’re uniformly more drawn to the otherworldly, aristocratic dreamworlds set in motion than we are to the material at hand. But without fail, Love & Friendship puts its sharpened dialogue before anything else, its sheen lavish but nevertheless toned down as a way to heighten Stillman’s bougie targeted commentary. Set in the late 1700s, the film follows the misadventures of Lady Susan Vernon (Kate Beckinsale), a calculating socialite desperate to claw back to the peak of the social ladder after her wealthy husband suddenly dies. Using her teenage daughter (Morfydd Clark) as a ploy to distract from her own manipulations (she figures the girl, at the end of her teenage years, is now well-suited to attain a man of her own) we watch, with unabashed delight, as she hungrily lusts after the dim-witted Sir James Martin (Tom Bennett), with whom she doesn’t have a romantic connection but rather a fiscal one.

Calm and collected, she seems apt to win nearly anyone over with her slithery charisma alone. One wrong move, though, and she very well may be forced to go back to the abominable land known as square one, and that’s not somewhere this professional schemer is much willing to head toward. And we don’t want to see Lady Susan’s ambitions collapse anyway. She’s the kind of morally ambiguous character we’d like to see get away with something sinful, a la Tom Ripley or Norman Bates. The role gives Beckinsale, oftentimes cast aside as a reliable slab of eye candy to be visually admired but not always taken seriously, the chance to announce herself as standing among her generation’s most underrated actresses. Through Lady Susan is she provided with a vehicle that exploits her comedic chops just as much as it does her startling ability to near offhandedly handle the verbal exercises Stillman readily throws at her. Beautifully self-possessed, she gives one of the best performances of 2016. Stillman’s writing and direction is as dryly acerbic as ever, but it’s his winning ensemble that accentuates the sum of its parts. Chloë Sevigny, as Lady Susan’s closest confidant, is a wry hoot as a Yankee who prefers the comforts of affluent English society to the less glamorous opportunities of America. Bennett is even better as an imbecilic love interest never to be undermined because his idiocy is so endearing, so effortlessly funny. But we’re enchanted by Stillman’s effortless staging. An unconventional but fun adaptation, Love & Friendship is a cinematic parfait of swank and substance that should practically boast in its being among the premier movies of 2016. A student at the University of Washington, Blake will major in Visual Communications or Journalism.

GET PUZZLED! Christmas Questions to ask around the dinner table: 1) After leaving Bethlehem, to which country did Joseph, Mary, and Jesus travel? 2) Christmas is celebrated on the 25th of December. Who is the patron saint remembered on the 26th of December? 3) Every elf has this ornament on the tip of their shoes. Which ornament are we talking about? 4) Everyone is familiar with the mistletoe tradition. What is the color of the berries of the plant? 5) How does Santa Claus go back up the chimney to continue his journey of delivering gifts? 6) How many points does a snowflake traditionally have? 7) Name the eight original Reindeer.

Answer on p.15

8) One of the most famous Cola companies in the world used to have advertisements featuring a happy, smiling Santa Claus. Name the company 9) Red and green are the two colors most associated with Christmas. Which are the two other colors, according to Christmas holiday trivia, that are also extremely popular in this season? 10) Traditionally, kids leave out snacks for Santa Claus. What are these snacks? Answers: 1) Egypt 2) Stephen 3) Bells 4) White 5) He places his finger on the side of his nose, gives a smile and a nod 6) Six 7) Blitzen, Comet, Cupid, Dasher, Prancer, Vixen, Dancer, & Donner 8) Coca Cola 9) Gold and Silver 10) Cookies and milk

Page 14 • Valley Bugler • December 2016

Virtual Reality Gifts for the Geek By Oscar Myre IV Valley Bugler Columnist Christmas is just around the corner so what should you buy your favorite geek this holiday season? I recommend you consider a VR Headset/Glasses. VR stands for Vulcan-Romulan…..just kidding! It actually stands for Virtual Reality (VR), and immerses the user in an interactive 3D environment. Instead of looking at a screen in front of you, you put on a headset that blocks out all reality and places you into a virtual experience. VR and AR (Augmented Reality) use the same kinds of tech, but my understanding of VR is that it is a completely virtual experience whereas AR is a hybrid of the real world with virtual components. More about AR in the future. Armed with an Amazon gift card I started checking out VR headsets in November. Some headsets connect to a computer and have a builtin display/screen inside the headset. Others take advantage of the user's phone screen that slides into the headset. I’ve heard at lease one Tech snob say that the experience on the

phone headsets is less impressive due to the lesser processing power. I would think with the new phones it would be more about the software and less about the hardware. One advantage of the Phone based headset/glasses is cost. VR Headsets such as Google Cardboard start at around $10. You can download some VR apps and slide in your phone (iPhone or Android) to get started. As the Google Cardboard title says it is made of cardboard. There are plenty of options for $20 or more that are made of plastic and look really cool. These headsets have controls right on them and you can also use a wireless Bluetooth remote. If you are shopping make sure to see if it is compatible with your phone. It looks like Android phones have a lot more options. Many of the remotes for the headsets don’t work for iPhone. Also keep in mind the size of your phone many of the headsets don’t work with the larger phone sizes. VR is popular now for gaming, but

it has tremendous potential to be a teaching tool and some see it as a treatment tool for mental illness. For now, I can’t wait to get my headset and play a few games with the family. It will arrive right before this article goes to print. Do you have a VR/AR headset? If you do please let me know what you think about yours in the comments of

the online version of this article, or give a shout on FB. I will see you in the future. Merry Christmas! VR image by Kjpargeter / Freepik Oscar Myre IV is the head web developer at RAM Mounts in Seattle. Oscar enjoys playing outside with his kiddos and doing crazy mudruns. Visit

Photos: Oscar R Myre V, at age 9 months; 3 years and almost 8 years of age. ♥ This highly intelligent little boy keeps us all on our toes, and has us all rolling in hysterics when he breaks out a belly laugh. Happy Birthday, Buddy!

December is the month that things start to go a little wild in our families. Not including Christmas and New Year, there are a total of 8 birthdays in the span of 6 weeks. FUN! So, happy birthday, to our dear sweet little boy, who is turning 8 this Christmas! It's hard to believe that this is our "baby" who is growing up so fast...Minecraft gamer, outside adventurer and overall FUN little boy, you are such a beautiful part of the family. You are truly my little buddy, and I cherish the times we get together playing and our snuggles, as well as seeing you learn and refine your "Math Wizardry" and love for Jesus!!! WE LOVE YOU, AND ARE BLESSED TO CALL YOU OUR SON! ☺ And a very special Happy Birthday wish to Grandma Jill, Colby and Miley we are so excited to celebrate your special days this month, too!

December 2016 • Valley Bugler • Page 15

The 12 Days of Pet-Safe Holidays

Adorable Adoptee 'Sampson' wishes you and yours a Merry Christmas!

(Family Features) The holidays can be a hectic time for everyone. While you’re busily gearing up for guests and parties, it’s important to remember your pet’s safety to ensure a festive and fun season is enjoyed by all. From bright decorations to holiday house guests, it can be easy to overlook a few household dangers that may cause harm to your favorite companions. Here are a few things to keep in mind to keep your fuzzy friend safe and jolly this holiday: 12) Covered Cords: Cords used for holiday lights can be tempting to chew for many pets. Take time while decorating to tape down or cover cords to help prevent shocks, burns or other serious injuries. Even if your pet doesn't normally chew cords, just playing with them can cause fraying or breakage, due to their sharp claws and nails. Don't take a chance, and get them covered. 11) Tempting Table Scraps: Rich scraps such as drippings, gravy and poultry skin can cause pets to suffer from upset stomach, diarrhea and even pancreatitis, which are not only terribly painful but can be fatal. Giving your dog poultry bones is also a bad idea as they can splinter and get stuck in your dog’s gastrointestinal tract. 10) Radiant Ribbons: Cats may be interested in playing with or eating tinsel and ribbons hanging from trees. These decorations should be placed high on the tree or not used at all because they can potentially cause serious intestinal damage if swallowed.

Sudoku Answer

9) Dinging Doorbells: Consider putting your dog on a leash before people start arriving. Not only will you be able to control him if he begins to jump, you’ll also avoid him running out the door. 8) Tasty Treats: Keep human party snacks out of reach from animals and offer pet-friendly options instead, such as BLUE Santa Stew Holiday Feast and Santa Paws Snacks. 7) Quiet Corners: Provide pets with a quiet place to retreat so they can choose whether to come out and visit or keep to themselves when company arrives. 6) Patient Puppies: Tell your guests that your puppy is in training, and he needs to be polite before they say “hello” to him. Have your dog sit, using a treat if necessary, and once he’s sitting and calm let your guests pet him. 5) Perilous Plants: Mistletoe, holly berries and poinsettia plants are all poisonous for dogs, so skip them as decorations or make sure they are out of reach. Symptoms of illness form ingesting these plants include intestinal upset, such as vomiting and diarrhea, excessive drooling, and abdominal pain. 4) Guarded Glasses: Alcohol and pets do not mix. Place alcoholic drinks safely out of reach and patrol the party to be sure your guests do the same. Alcohol poisoning can be fatal. 3) Calming Coats: Using a ThunderShirt can calm a nervous dog by applying gentle pressure to the body. In addition to the traditional coat, there are now cold weather ThunderSweater and ThunderCoat options.

Merry Christmas from Rescued Paws. We appreciate your support throughout the year of pet supplies and cash donations to keep our rescue funded. Rescued Paws has many dogs and cats in foster care, just waiting for their Forever Home.

Please go to our website at Here, you can view and learn about all of the Adorable Adoptees. For more information please contact Rescued Paws: Rescued Paws: (360)673-7373

'O Christmas Tree! O Christmas Tree! Your ornaments are history!' - love, the cat

2) Nearby Numbers: Keep contact information for your veterinarian and the nearest emergency veterinary clinic readily available in case of a holiday mishap. Also for that pet sitter, if you happen to be taking a vacation or a holiday for a few days, and leaving Fido in their care.

1) Towering Tree: Seasonal trees are sure to attract a pet’s attention and should be secured to keep from toppling over if a pet should try to climb them, use as a scratching post or simply bump into them. For more information on how to keep pets safe during the holiday season, visit

Page 16 • Valley Bugler • December 2016

Merry Christmas from the Valley Bugler  

The December edition of Cowlitz County's favorite newspaper.

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