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Table of Contents
Inside this issue of
NEW t his mont h:
Youth with An Attitude to Serve By DeeGee Lester Strong sense of self at the ripe old age of 13.
Bridal Beauty Basics
By Jordan McLeod Beautiful bride, effective make-up, radiant face. Page 22
Common Sense for the Big Day
Polling those who are married, helps those who will marry.
Vol. 6, Issue 1
Creative Color Schemes
Customized hues for impeccable decorating.
Shapely Wedding Prep
By Sydney Phillips Realistic fitness for the big day. Put together healthful lifestyle choices for lasting beauty.
Special Bridal Section
What Techie Brides Do
By Cody Crawford Creating the new generation of wedding memories.
Validity Bridal 2016 www.ValidityBridal.com
When “I Do” Gets Real
Darcy Ferris Photography
By Russ Adcox The long-term actuality of matrimonial bliss. Page 28
Find Validity in 10 Tennessee Counties! www.validitymag.com/find-validity
In Every Issue: Validity Recipes
January Book Reviews
The Believer’s Walk
By Katie Taylor
By James Lund
By Charles Newbold
Our book guy lets the experts do the advising. Smart man.
I’m recording the game. Please don’t tell me who won.
Food for fast tracking a healthy new year. Page 6
One Lawyer’s Opinion By Landis Turner Lawyers still are a good crux for a wisecrack. Who better to poke fun than Landis? Page 12
Also in this Issue:
By Cassandra Warner
By Bill Pulliam
Blooming gardens reflect the beauty of marriage. Plus flower ideas for your ceremony.
If you feed the birds, follow simple guidelines.
Reality Perspective, Page 5 Plugged or Unplugged?, Page 23 Lookin’ Back, Page 36 Unconscionable Cogitation, Page 38
Validity Magazine is published monthly in Hohenwald, Tennessee. Validity Magazine reserves the right to edit editorial and advertising submissions for appropriateness of the publication. Reproduction of any part of Validity Magazine without permission of the publisher is prohibited. Distribution of this magazine does not constitute an endorsement of information, products or services. Views expressed in Validity Magazine do not necessarily represent those of the publisher. Every effort has been made to insure accuracy of the publication contents. However, we do not guarantee the accuracy of all information nor the absence of errors and omissions.
Publisher Becky Jane Newbold, email@example.com, 931-628-6039 Managing Editor Shane Newbold, info@ValidityMag.com, 931-628-6039 Director of Digital Innovation Cody Crawford, firstname.lastname@example.org, 615-768-9479 Contributing Writers, Bill Pulliam, Cassandra Warner, Charles Newbold Jr., DeeGee Lester, James Lund, Jordan McLeod, Katie Taylor, Landis Turner, Russ Adcox, Sydney Phillips Contributing Photographers, Cassandra Warner, Katie Taylor
Validity Magazine, Published 12 times per year, monthly, Vol. 6, Issue 1 POSTMASTER: Send address changes to Validity Magazine, P. O. Box 516, Hohenwald, TN 38462-0516. Address Service Requested. Subscriptions are available on an annual basis at $20 per year. Mail check or money order to: Validity Subscriptions, P.O. Box 516, Hohenwald, Tennessee 38462.
Validity Magazine exists to reflect rural lifestyles of rural communities along the Natchez Trace Parkway in both storytelling and photo journalism. This local publication is designed to promote positive life experiences by delivering authentic, relevant content on healthy living, nature, outdoors, technology, gardening, entertainment and travel to the people who enjoy the small town experience.
From The Publisher
Good Fruit L By Becky Jane Newbold
ife, “in love” or not, in a matrimonial state or not, depends on relationships. And the life of each man and woman is judged by its fruit. “For there is no good tree which produces bad fruit, nor, on the other hand, a bad tree which produces good fruit. For each tree is known by its own fruit.” Luke 6:4344. Logical, in my way of thinking. You see, I know a few “bad apples” and don’t really want to be in a relationship with them. Nor do I want my life to be known for “bad fruit.” To maintain the fruit of the spirit, which begins
Thank You for reading and Supporting Validity and thanks, Larry M., for missing me.
Polar Bears in Peril
andwagon jumping has never been a hobby of mine. Buying into global warming or being a skeptic occupied little of my thinking. A friend of mine and I had contradictory comments about the polar By Shane Newbold ice cap melting. I heard it was melting and he thought there was more ice than ever. And typically, gunshop talk is mostly opinions based on what we hear in the media, a truly unreliable source. Doing a little research proved we were both right. Since 2007 (the lowest, yearly, recorded amount of polar ice coverage), there is more now, a gradual increase each year. However, since 1980, the polar ice cap covers 20 percent less of the ocean below, a significant, historical decrease. Polar bears are struggling. That fact is well documented. But evidence regarding global warming is based on the special interest groups’ agendas. “Big oil” is not going to admit that dirty fuels contribute to warming of the planet. And nearly every “green” entity relies on fundraising, grants and taxpayer money to prove their hypotheses. Some groups are altruistic, but everyone touts the expert data, whether they are right or not. You know as well as I, experts abound. Greenhouse gases probably are adversely affecting Earth. In China, people must wear masks to help thwart off the polluted air.
with love, joy and peace, I must practice daily the latter portion of Galatians 5:22-23: “patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control...” This grows relationships and thus, my life. And like nurturing a garden, this takes diligence. Shane and I will celebrate 29 years of friendship and marriage this year. We strive to share lives of “good fruit” with one another and with those we meet. It is my hope this simple word helps you somehow. Blessings to you in 2016, wherever you are in life’s journey.
Third world countries are industrializing at breakneck speed. Gluttonous Americans cannot judge them. Becky Jane and I consume much fuel in our toys. Honestly, we have no plans to stop. Scientists are also considering the warming trends could be partly caused by deviations in Earth’s orbit. A natural cycle that has been going on since creation. Hence, ice ages and tropical shifts in our planet’s history. Regarding ocean levels rising, the Gulf of Mexico, 60 million years ago, covered much of southern North America. The Mississippi River was not a river. In McNairy County, southwest Tennessee, there is a place where I took my fifth graders to dig into the side of a creek bank for ocean fossils deposited there a long time ago. At the time, The Pink Palace Museum in Memphis allowed school group field trips. When you dig and hold the fossilized creatures, it leaves no doubt, southwest Tennessee was under the ocean blue. Coon Creek Science Center is a cool experience. So, let’s agree, the data is true. The oceans are rising. We should go find a location below sea level and build a city. When it floods, which it will, we can then spend billions of dollars rescuing the inhabitants and rebuilding the fiasco again. Makes sense to me. Again, polar bears are in peril. Why would I care? Firstly, they are cool, and we should try to save them. Secondly, I can relate to their predicament with two examples. The Little Tennessee River was flooded years ago to create Tellico
Lake. A tragedy. Its pristine water produced a world record brown trout. Meandering through some of the most productive farm land in east Tennessee, family farms were flooded. A tiny fish, the snail darter, was supposedly found only in this river. The creature halted the damming of the river until it was found in other streams. Soon after the lake was formed and humans took hostage the banks of the new lake, fish advisories for PCBs and mercury ensued. Don’t eat the catfish. The bobwhite quail began declining across the entire U. S. in the 1990s. I truly love and miss upland foul hunting. The pointing dogs are awesome. And with my shooting skills (or lack thereof ), the quail were never in much trouble, as my dogs would attest. Several factors have been identified over the years. Many thought hawks and coyotes ate too many birds. Redtail hawks are big and no match for the fast foul. Smaller, quicker birds of prey may catch a few, but certainly cannot rely solely on quail for survival. A Tennessee Wildlife Resources Agency officer informed me years ago, trapped coyotes whose stomachs were pumped rarely contained quail remains. A brood of summer quail typically enters the next breeding season with only 20 percent of adults and first year birds. A tough existence, indeed. In farming regions that use pesticides, the protein-rich insects vital for baby birds are not numerous enough. Quail numbers began declining at about the same time wild turkeys were making a comeback. Some hypothesize turkeys eat eggs and destroy quail nests. The correlation between turkeys’ rise and the quails’ demise is hard to ignore.
Eyeworms began infecting the little birds countrywide, and in close knit societies, the parasites get passed around. It does not kill the birds, but they lose some vision, not allowing them to see their food and hawks overhead, especially in open country, like Texas. The hawks, which were not a serious threat before, are now. Am I a greenie? Am I an oil guzzling, true, blue American? Yes, I am both. So where does that put me on the political continuum, left or right? Neither. Just searching for real facts. We should take seriously Earth’s inhabitants in peril, including ourselves. Global warming or not, the earth is changing. If science is correct, 100 years from now the planet will be different, maybe better, maybe worse. “These are all the years of Abraham’s life that he lived, one hundred and seventy-five years. Abraham breathed his last and died in a ripe old age, an old man and satisfied with life; and he was gathered to his people.” Genesis 25: 7-8 NASB. Maybe I’ll live another 100 years as old Abraham did and behold the polar bears’ outcome. Wouldn’t it be awesome if they survive? Of course, if the ice disappears, (at the current melt rate, it will be gone by 2040 give or take) then we will all be living in a tropical paradise. Desert dwellers will have to relocate. Al Gore’s experts, in 2007, said the ice would be gone by 2013. The reality: Only God knows. Father to four and best friend to Becky Jane for 28 years, Shane Newbold lives life to the fullest Boating, birdwatching, fishing and enjoying his family.
anuary is about getting back on track after the holiday Recipes, splurges, trying to find a Photos & Food routine again and cooking more Styling By colorful foods without all the Katie Taylor added sugars and processed ingredients. It can be a wonderful time to experiment in the kitchen if you aren’t a big cook! With lots of great winter produce available, eating healthy isn’t too hard. From the Brussels sprouts we snuck into the Thai rolls, to the nourishing ginger and pears in the overnight breakfast dish, this month’s recipes are sure to .
get your taste buds craving whole, serving more nutrient-dense foods again. Cashew Milk 1 cup raw cashews (soaked overnight or for at least 4 Overnight Pear Muesli with hours) Vegan Cashew Milk 3 cups water Makes 2 large breakfast bowls 4 pitted dates Pear Muesli 1 teaspoon vanilla extract 1 cup rolled oats Pinch of salt 2 teaspoons chia seeds ¼ cup chopped dried apricot ½ teaspoon cinnamon ½ teaspoon ginger powder 1 pear, ¾ of it finely chopped, the remaining quarter thinly sliced for
Nutrient Dense & Delicious
Instructions: 1. To prepare the cashew milk, rinse and drain the soaked cashews. Combine the cashews and remaining ingredients in a high-powered
blender, and blend on high until smooth and no date pieces are visible. The milk can be stored in the refrigerator for up to one week. 2. For the muesli, mix all the in-
gredients together, and add 1¾ cup of the cashew milk. Stir, cover and store in the refrigerator overnight. In the morning, divide the muesli into two bowls, pour more cashew
milk over the top, and serve with sliced pears. Recipe Source: the fullhelping. com
Instructions: 1. The coconut cream sauce can be made ahead of time and stored in the refrigerator for up to one week. To prepare the sauce, blend everything together in a highpowered blender on high until smooth. 2. To prepare the casserole, heat the olive oil over medium heat in a large oven-safe pot. Add the chicken, season with salt and pepper, and cook just until both sides are beginning to brown, but not cooked through. Remove and set aside. 3. Add the shallots and leeks to the pan, sauté-
ing for about 5 minutes until soft. To the pot, add the mushrooms, and continue sautéing until the juices from the vegetables have evaporated. Season with salt, pepper, thyme and the lemon zest. Add the vinegar and sauté
One-Pot Paleo Chicken and Leeks
Serves 4 2 tablespoons olive oil 1½ pounds chicken thighs (or breasts for a lighter dish) 1 shallot, thinly sliced 3 leeks, thoroughly washed and chopped (begin at the white section and chop up until the green becomes darker and more difficult to cut through) 8 ounces mushrooms, sliced 2-3 stems fresh thyme, stalks removed Zest of ½ lemon 2 tablespoons white wine vinegar 2 cups savory coconut cream sauce (recipe below) 1 cup chicken stock Salt and pepper, to taste Savory Coconut Cream Sauce 1-15 ounce can coconut milk ½ cup hemp seeds ¼ cup nutritional yeast 1 teaspoon raw apple cider vinegar (if you cannot find raw, regular is fine) ½ teaspoon crushed red pepper 1 teaspoon onion powder 1 teaspoon garlic powder 1 teaspoon Italian seasoning ¼ teaspoon dried oregano 2 drops liquid smoke Salt and pepper, to taste
an additional minute or so. Add the remaining ingredients, including the chicken thighs, and partially cover the pot with a lid. Bring to a low boil, reduce the heat, and simmer for 40 minutes, or until the chicken is cooked through and sauce has thickened. 4. To make the chicken crispy, turn the broiler on and watch carefully for 3-5 minutes until the chicken is brown on top. Serve immediately. Recipe inspired by bibbyskitchenat36.com and theplantstrongvegan. com
1 package rice paper wrappers Dipping Sauce 10 pitted dates, soaked in hot water for 15 minutes 1 tablespoon sriracha 2 tablespoons peanut butter 1 tablespoon rice vinegar 2 tablespoons coconut aminos (can sub soy sauce) ½ teaspoon red pepper flakes ½ cup grapefruit juice (about ½ of a grapefruit, squeezed) 1 teaspoon molasses 1 teaspoon miso paste Water, to thin if needed
Thai Winter Rolls with Grapefruit-Peanut Dipping Sauce
Makes about 10 rolls Winter Rolls 1 tablespoon coconut oil 2 cloves garlic, minced 1 teaspoon fresh ginger, grated
½ pound fresh Brussels sprouts, stems removed and thinly sliced 1 large carrot, peeled and thinly chopped ½ red pepper, chopped 2 tablespoons coconut aminos (if you can’t find this, simply use soy sauce)
1 lime, juiced ½ teaspoon yellow curry powder ½ teaspoon ground pepper 4 green onions, chopped ¼ cup chopped basil 1½ cups cooked vermicelli/rice noodles 1 large avocado, thinly sliced
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Instructions: 1. For the sauce, add all ingredients to a high-powered blender or food processor and
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blend on high until dates are no longer visible. Add water if necessary. 2. For the rolls, first heat the coconut oil in a large skillet over medium heat. Add the garlic and ginger, and cook just until fragrant, about 30 seconds. Add the Brussels sprouts, and sauté for 5 minutes until tender. Add the carrot, red pepper, coconut
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aminos, lime juice, curry powder and pepper. Cook until flavors are fragrant and vegetables have softened. Remove from heat. 3. Finally, to assemble the rolls, prepare a shallow plate or dish with water, and begin by dipping one rice paper wrapper at a time in the water to help it become more pliable. Begin by adding the veggie mixture, followed by the cooked rice noodles, avocado, fresh basil and green onions. Fold the ends to the center and roll the sheet as you would a burrito. 4. Serve the rolls with the dipping sauce.
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On stage at The Theater Bug.
challenges and building wonderful memories together. But for a young woman, it is also reinforced by the presence in her life of strong women role models, including her mother, Melissa Jaggers, who serves as Associate Executive Director of Alignment Nashville that aligns Metro schools with existing resources throughout the community.
rom a strong sense of self, great things are accomplished, lives can be changed and miracles can happen. A strong and healthy sense of self anchors us to our roots and binds us to family. It brings honest awareness of who we are, an By DeeGee honest assessLester ment of our strengths and weaknesses and a trust in the unwinding of our unique pathway. To witness that sense of self and the balance of poise and enthusiasm in an adult is impressive. But Riley Jaggers is 13 years old and a student at Station Camp Middle School in Sumner County. Hearing Riley talk about her life is a delightful experience. It is obvious that her family, friends, school, church and community have all contributed to her sense of who she is and what she wants to do in life. That strong sense of self begins with a loving, close-knit family that enjoys doing things, facing
Photo Shannon Watson Photography
From a Sense of Self
“It really comes from my al Real Estate ALLY mom and growing up in an u r L oc ! o Y atmosphere that focuses on education and doing things for others,” Riley says. That desire to serve others as an active expression of self is also part of a life-long conCall Today nection with her church. For Your “I’ve been attending the FREE Community Church of HenConsultation! dersonville since before I was born,” Riley laughs. “It really is a huge family with wonderful people like (chilCarrie and Peder Jensen dren’s minister) Becky Keller Williams Realty Realtor/Broker Kitchen in my life. When our house flood- Mobile: 931-300-ALLY (2559) Office: 615-302-4242 ed two times (2008 and NashvilleCarrie@KW.com 2010), everything was www.NashvilleCarrie.com ruined, but so many 5083 Main St., Spring Hill TN 37174 people from the church were lined up around the house to help.” Find Us On Social Media That anchor is also Each Keller Williams Office is Independently Owned and Operated. extended by the church to provide chances for per- struction (tap and hip-hop) at the sonal growth. Pastor Doug American Academy of Dance since Varnado created a leadership age nine. Two years ago, she added team for kids, offering oppor- theater, joining The Theater Bug in tunities to students in middle East Nashville. Recently moved to the New school and high school to deLife Baptist Church on Gallatin velop small group leadership skills. The pastor’s invita- Pike, this innovative and dynamic tion is simple: “I’ve seen you theater, led by Cori Anne Laembe a leader and serve other mel, offers young actors a safe enpeople.” Those who accept vironment in which to explore the the call have a chance to serve challenging issues of life. Under both within the church and in the The Theater Bug’s motto: Creating Community, Building Confidence, larger community. “I’m just starting to be a part Changing Lives, Laemmel writes of the team and to do things in the and directs productions that tackle church,” Riley says. “But a couple teen issues ranging from dramas of weeks ago, we went to an event, about adoption or autism, to muUnder the Bridge, to bring food sicals such as the upcoming January and a sermon to the homeless on production, 7 Ways to Sunday, that explore teen suicide. Jefferson Street.” “Sometimes we have a student This summer, Riley will be part who has been in the situation we of her first mission trip, traveling to San Diego, California, where team are addressing in the play,” Riley members will cross the border each says. “But other times we spend day to Tecate, Mexico to build a time as actors learning about the ishome for a family. Her dream is to sue before we begin the process of continue with mission trips, which character analysis and reading lines, she hopes will include missions to and then we start rehearsals.” For a young woman who enviplaces like Haiti. sions a life of service to other young “I would love to major in pastoring in college and become a people, these powerful experiences youth minister,” she says. “I’d love provide a new depth in development of a confident self. to work with small children.” In addition to her church, DeeGee Lester serves as Director dance and theater play a major role of Education at the Parthenon in in her development and sense of Nashville. self. She has been taking dance inValiditymag.com 11 .
One Lawyer’s Opinion
anta Claus, the tooth fairy, an honest lawyer and an old drunk are walking down the street, when they simultaneously spot a one hundred dollar bill. Who gets it? The old drunk of course. The other three are fantasy creatures.
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“Okay, I’d tell him, ‘I hereby give and convey to you all and singular, my estate and interests, rights, claims and advantages of and in, said orange with full power to bite, cut, freeze and otherwise eat the same, or give away with or without the pulp, juice and seeds, and Q: How are an apple and a lawyer all rights and advantages with full power to bite, cut, freeze and otheralike? A: They both look good hanging wise eat the same, or give the same away with or without the pulp, from a tree. juice, rind and seeds, and anything herein before or hereinafter in any ***** deed, or deeds, instruments of A lawyer’s girlfriend became whatever kind and anything herein pregnant with twins. He wanted to to the contrary in anywise notwithmarry her but was refused. The girl standing.’” said Papa had rather have two bas***** tards in the family than one lawyer. Arriving late for work, a labora***** tory worker was surprised to learn As the lawyer awoke from sur- that lawyers instead of rats would gery, he asked, “Why are all the be used in lab experiments. Upon blinds drawn?” “There was a fire inquiry, he was told that there were across the street, and we didn’t some things rats just would not do. want you to think you had died.” This column discusses legal issues of general interest and does not ***** give legal advice on any reader’s One day in contract class, the personal situation. The law is not professor asked one of his better a one-size-fits-all hat. Consult a students, “Now if you were to give lawyer of your choice. someone an orange, how would Landis Turner is a graduate you go about it?” The student re- of the University of the Southplied, “Here’s an orange.” Sewanee and Vanderbilt University The professor was livid. “No. School of Law. He is a former No. Think like a lawyer.” president of the Tennessee Bar AsThe student then recited, sociation.
***** the accountant said. The lawyer, without skipping a beat, answers, Q: What are lawyers good for? “He doesn’t think you have the guts A: They make used car salesmen look good. to pull the trigger.” ***** *****
The District Attorney was approaching the Suwanee River when he noticed a sign: Caribbean Cruise - $99. He stopped and bought a ticket, whereupon the salesman hit him on his head, wrapped him in a rug and tossed the DA in the river. By Landis The Public Defender noticed ***** Turner the same sign. He too bought a The Godfather, accompanied ticket, got hit on the head and by his attorney, walks into a room tossed into the river. The Public Defender awoke to meet with his accountant. The Godfather asks the accountant and called out to the State’s Attorwhere the $3 million he embez- ney, “Do they serve drinks on this zled from him is. The accountant cruise?” The District Attorney replied, doesn’t answer. The attorney interrupts, “This man is deaf and dumb, “They didn’t last year!” but I can interpret for you.” “Well, ***** ask him where the @/#!* money is,” the Godfather demands. The acA man walks into a bar. He sees countant signs back, “I don’t know what you are talking about.” The a beautiful, well-dressed woman attorney, using sign language, signs sitting on a bar stool alone. “Hi, back, “He says, he doesn’t know there. How’s it going tonight?” She turns to him, looks him what we’re talking about.” Then the Godfather pulls out a straight in the eyes and says, “I’ll pistol and points it at the accoun- do what you want, any time, any tant’s temple. “Now, ask him where place, anywhere. It doesn’t matter my @#!!## money is.” The scared to me.” The guy raises his eyebrows accountant signs, “The money is in and says, “No kidding? What law a suitcase buried in my back yard.” firm do you work for?” The Godfather asks the lawyer what
r i d B a y l t 20 1 6 i d il
Venue & Catering: Westbury House on the Square
we were just making the most of our short weekend together. We planned a hiking trip and picnic lunch for Sunday to Fall Creek Falls, but when we woke up that morning, it was pouring down rain. Nic was way more disappointed than he should have been, because
Nic and I were living about two hours apart, so he came down to visit me one weekend and I didn’t know, but he had traveled to visit
I am the one who likes hiking, he was just going because I wanted to. We decided to try to salvage the day, but the rain never let up, and we gave up and went back home. Once we got home, I immediately changed into pjs, because I was still clueless. However, when
my parents that week and asked for their blessing. We had a wonderful weekend including making a bonfire and eating s’mores. I didn’t suspect a thing because I thought
Cake by Sweetest Day Bakery
Flowers by Nashville Wedding-Sutton’s Flowers
Simply M Photography I really can’t pick a favorite part, can I say the entire day? It was just perfect to spend the day with our family and friends. We got to celebrate with eating, drinking and dancing and at the end of the best day ever, I knew it was really only the beginning of a wonderful life together.
I returned to the living room, he had set up our picnic on the floor with lots of candles. Nic got down on one knee and said, “Jess, I know this day hasn’t gone according to plan, but our relationship has never really followed a plan. I can’t wait anymore, will you marry me?” All I remember is screaming and jumping up and down. I don’t know if I even said yes, or just kissed him and nodded. I was thrilled. We had talked about getting married many times, but I didn’t realize he had
Immediately after the ceremony as we walked back down the aisle together, with our hands in the air as the guests clapped, we headed out the door and had a moment just to ourselves before our families came out to join us. It was that moment that we could finally let loose a little and begin to enjoy our married life together.
been saving up for a ring. Let me tell you, it is a beautiful ring that he had custom made, and it’s perfect. Turns out, Nic had told our families he was going to propose that weekend. So even though things didn’t go the way he had hoped, Nic wanted to do it that day, because someone would spill the beans, and he wanted it to be a surprise. Wedding colors: Gold with shades of pink and coral. I didn’t have a particular theme in
I am a lifestyle photographer in Middle Tennessee, with a love for family, friends and Oldies music. My intent in each session, as well as wedding, is to photograph real personalities, genuine emotions and those ‘small moments’ that make life so sweet! Tip for Wedding Photographers: The best advice I’ve been given about photographing weddings is to allow extra time in the timeline you create with the couple. Even if you know it will only take 30 minutes to do, say, the bridal party pictures, list 45 minutes on the timeline to allow for late arrivals! Wedding days tend to run late (even with the best intentions), so being able to reassure the couple that nothing is being rushed is a great way to bring calm to the event. – Molly Wantland
mind, I just knew what I wanted and it worked. Looking back, I guess you could call it industrial chic with lots of glitter. Wedding favors: We wanted to keep it simple and had candy and mints that read, “Thanks for sharing our special day.” Planning tip: Do not stress! Just enjoy the whole process, because at the end of it all, you will be with the person you love and that is all that matters.
Venue: Rippavilla Plantation. We loved “the grounds, the courtyard and how beautiful it looked at night. The whole setting.”
We were engaged at The Hermitage - Andrew Jackson’s Tennessee home in Hermitage. The reason Ken picked the spot was we are history nuts. We went on a horse and buggy ride, then a tour. Ken got down on one knee behind the home. He had a limo waiting out back and we went to dinner and then met up with family and friends. Our family and friends knew that he was asking. He had previously asked my 13 year old son for permission. Planning tip: Get the big things out of the way first, venue, food, etc.
Darcy Ferris Photography I am a lifestyle wedding and family photographer. I own and operate Darcy Ferris Photography based out of Spring Hill, Tennessee. I cater to Tennessee, but love to travel for weddings. Every session (wedding or family) is done on location. I’ve been in business for three years and am beyond blessed to work with couples on their happiest day. The best part of what I do is getting to watch families grow. I’ve done weddings, then their maternity photos, then newborn and family photos. To learn more about my photography style and services, please visit www.darcyferrisphoto.net
The couple presented guests with wine corks as a wedding favor.
Tip for Wedding Photographers: I highly suggest connecting with your bride and groom’s wedding planner to make sure all parties are on the same page concerning the wedding timeline. Since the photographer is with the bride most of the day, it’s best to know when everything needs to happen and then to stay out of the way in order to capture details and moments. I personally like to be photographing as unnoticeably as possible. – Darcy Ferris
Flowers by Nichole. After they were pronounced husband and wife, they went inside and had a group hug with husband/wife/ son.
Cake by Classic cakes. “Delicious,” Hope says!
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Seeing the bride during the first look.
Wed - Thurs – 10 a.m.– 5 p.m. Fri - Sat – 10 a.m.– 6 p.m.
Venue: Milky Way Farm
We met in high school band when I was a sophomore and Cameron was a senior. We dated for six years, before Cameron finally asked the question. Cameron asked me to marry him on a family trip to Cape San Blas, Florida. One afternoon, we went out together (just he and I) to eat dinner and have ice cream. After this, we walked on the beach while the sun was going down. It was just the two of us on the beach when Cameron got down on one knee and asked the big question. I was completely surprised! Wedding colors: Traditional theme with blue and pink. Planning tip: Give yourself plenty of time and start planning early. .
Seeing Paige for the first time in her wedding dress. â€œShe was beyond beautiful!â€?
Rehearsal Dinner by Milky Way Farm. Wedding Catering by Nolens BBQ.
Cake by Mandy Stewart
AOC Photography Statemint Studios is located at 105 South 1st Street in the heart of downtown Pulaski, Tennessee and serves the local community and travels anywhere in the southeast. We pride ourselves in capturing the moments that mean the most to you as a wedding story and all the little details in between, so that when you look back on your wedding photos, you can not only enjoy the memories but relive them as well. We take such pride in our work and hand edit our portraits so that each and every image is as unique as the couple themselves. We love to meet new faces and hear their love stories. Most of our business comes by word of mouth or past clientele who want to keep my work in their hearts. We couldn’t be more honored to be considered to capture one of life’s precious memories for you and your loved ones. Tip for Wedding Photographers: While the bride is gorgeous on her big day, as well as the groom is handsome, remember all the hard work your clients have put into the details and remember to capture those. – Ashley Chapman
Keeping with the theme of the venue, the couple presented guests with Milky Way candy bars as favors. Flowers by Lively Florist
Tuesday thru Saturday 10 a.m. - 5 p.m. Walking through the sparklers at the end of the night and seeing all our friends and family. Validitymag.com
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ongratulations, bride-tobe! Your wedding will most likely be one of the most memorable events of your life, so you’ll want the pictures and videos from that occasion to remind you of how lovely you looked. It has been a tradition to hire a professional makeup artist to By Jordan beautify you McLeod for that special day, but now many women are choosing to do it for themselves. Some ladies feel that they don’t look like themselves when others apply their cosmetics. Some would rather spend that money on another part of their wedding.
Darcy Ferris Photography
Beauty Basics for Brides Whatever the reason, this article will help provide you with tips for your bridal day beauty. A good place to start is with an inspiration photo. By looking through pictures, you can begin to develop an idea of what you want your makeup to look like on your big day. Once you find one (or maybe a couple) that you want to replicate, take it to the makeup counter at a department or specialty beauty store. Even if you’re not going to hire one of the artists there, most will perform a free trial, give you friendly application advice and help you find the products to achieve your desired appearance. An establishment like this is also more likely to carry professional lines of makeup which are formulated to look better in photographs and videos and can be longer-lasting. These features can be benefi-
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cial to maintaining your makeup throughout your ceremony and reception. The right foundation is essential to creating perfect, wedding day makeup. For this reason, there are several things to consider when it comes to that choice. The first is making sure you buy the right shade - you could be fairer or tanner than when made that initial purchase. If you are intending to get a spray tan or apply self-tanner before your big day, be mindful of that fact when you’re testing foundations and concealers. Even though sun protection is very important, especially at outside weddings, SPF has a reflective quality in flash photography that can make you look ghostly. Experts recommend taking pictures of yourself during these try-out sessions to make sure you don’t run into this problem on the day of your special occasion. Those test photos will also help you decide whether or not you need to amplify your eye and/or lip makeup colors. This doesn’t necessarily mean that you will have to apply additional product, as that can lead to an overly heavy look, but that you may need a more saturated version of the color you want. Even if you choose to accentuate your eyes and don’t
want to draw attention to your lips, many professionals think that nude lipsticks can make you look washed out when wearing light clothing and recommend applying a slightly deeper hue than you might normally use. When it comes to your eye makeup, no matter what shade you choose, make sure you use waterproof formulas to withstand all those happy tears. Pack a touch-up kit for fixing any shininess, smudges or other problems you might encounter over the course of the day and have a bridesmaid or other trusted person keep it on hand. Also, make sure to allow yourself extra time the day of the ceremony; however long you think it will take to apply your makeup, add at least thirty minutes. You don’t want to feel rushed or stressed if something goes wrong. By scheduling additional time, you can always start over and still not leave your guests waiting. Whether you copy your favorite celebrity’s makeup, or you already know how you want to appear at your wedding, it can be wise to choose a look that is timeless, not trendy. You don’t want to embarrass your future self (or your family) when viewing those pictures later in life. No matter how you choose to do your makeup, regardless if you choose to focus on your eyes or your lips, remember to take the time to enjoy yourself. A happy bride is beautiful because she’s smiling. This day is a wonderful celebration of the love between you and your chosen partner, who obviously already thinks you’re gorgeous. And with the information you’ve learned from this article, everyone else will know it too! Jordan McLeod is a graduate of Middle Tennessee State University. She has been interested in fashion since she recognized the allure of polka dots and fascinated by all things beauty after she realized the transformative power of mascara and lipstick.
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The Benefits of an Unplugged Wedding
e got personal for this piece. Polling our staff, friends and family, we asked two simple questions: 1. What are you glad you did at your wedding? 2. Is there anything you wish you had done? Of our group of married people, 85 percent had something they would change if they could do it over. Maybe a detail was not perfect, or maybe something larger went wrong, such as forgetting to invite a special friend. Usually, even the bigger regrets don’t end up ruining anyone’s life. Propitiously, 100 percent of the people we surveyed are still happily married. Although having the perfect wedding day is not the most important aspect of marriage, it can be disappointing to have something go even slightly wrong when you’ve spent so much energy and cash planning it. The goal is to have everything go smoothly so you can enjoy the celebration of the beginning of your marriage. Photography-related sorrows contributed to 23 percent of our survey participants’ woes.
38% Are glad they kept their wedding simple
U.S. is $26,444, keeping it simple can be a blessing (costofwedding. com). On the other hand, 15 percent of our poll group wished they had done a bigger wedding, invited more people or had more of a party. It’s best to discuss the overall plan for your wedding with your partner-to-be before beginning your planning. A slight majority of the people we polled, 54 percent, wish they had put more effort into planning. Often when you find that special someone, you just want to get married and start your lives together. But you’re also throwing one of the most important and likely most expensive parties you’ll Had something they would change ever throw, so it’s important to about their wedding make every moment count. Plan know best which memories you’ll each stage of the day, and make want to have years down the road. sure you have plenty of help from Although it can seem tedious to people you trust. One member of grab a shot of everyone who was our poll group said the best thing in attendance, photos are often the she did at her wedding was to hire most special part of getting mar- a wedding coordinator. “In the ried, because you just aren’t going end it saved us tons of money beto remember everything that hap- cause the planner was able to find pened that day. Sometimes, you might even see photos of something you didn’t get to witness at all. For instance, the photographer might be able to get photos of who tied those annoying cans to your tailpipe, so you can exact your revenge later. Surprisingly, another popular thought from our survey group was that 38 percent of people are glad they kept it simple. Although traditionally the bride’s parents foot most of the bill for the wedWish they had spent more time ding, more couples are paying for planning it themselves these days. “We paid for everything up front, and we vendors at great deals, not to menwere really glad we didn’t end up tion my sanity was saved. We were with any wedding-related debt,” able to enjoy the wedding weekend says one participant. Since the without any stress.” average cost of a wedding in the Although hiring a professional photographer can be expensive, sometimes that’s the best way to capture those special moments. Wedding photographers often
There is hardly anything more annoying than someone distracted by their smartphone during a significant life event. This includes your wedding. You may be fine with guests holding up phones and giant tablets during the ceremony, but most likely not. You would probably prefer that they pay attention to the lifealtering occasion that is your wedding. There are many ways to keep your guests from ruining your special day with unwanted smartphone behavior. A few reminders in strategic places will usually do the trick. If you’re fine with your guests tweeting and sharing everywhere but the ceremony, a note in the program might do. If you’re still worried, it might be smart to have someone make an announcement before the ceremony begins that guests need to silence their phones and avoid snapping photos while the service is occurring. You may even need to talk to one or more guests in person if you’re worried they won’t stick to your plan. While the other wedding day events are underway, you might not mind people using their smartphones. You might even encourage it. Be mindful, however, that guests posting to social media might let the cat out of the bag that certain people were not invited to the wedding. To avoid hurting anyone’s feelings, it might be wise to discourage social media use altogether. When you make a decision on how to use technology at your wedding, make sure to let your guests know what your decision is. Most will be happy to follow your wishes if you make them known. Validitymag.com
Enjoy these unique, custom color palettes.
While pink is a traditional selection for most weddings, decor in shades of pink is all the rage this year, Many brides are opting to create an experience for their guests with shades of one color, and no choice is more charming.
Shades of blue and yellow make for a unique color combination for your special day. Blue is a confident color, and navy is right on trend. The blue-tinted gray complements the other colors, and yellow provides contrast. Substitute yellow with metallic gold to really add a punch.
Midnight Dream .
This trendy color combo reminds us of tranquil beach days. Navy and teal accent colors offset the bright orange and cool gray. Your wedding will be a serene destination for your guests, even if itâ€™s in your own back yard.
This delicious fusion of shades of gray-purple and wine red is sure to bring forth a passionate night. Use dark brown accents to bring out the lighter colors and make your white dress the star of the party. Validitymag.com
How To Be In Your Best
Don’t Forget The Groom!
For Your Big Day
have never had a wedding to start planning for, but I do have a passion for having an overall healthy lifestyle. I can imagine a heavily photographed event such as this one would inspire By Sydney women Phillips to start working out (again). Wouldn’t it be great, though, if your workout regimen for a special event or vacation were just the norm? Here are some of my thoughts about getting in shape, whatever that looks like for you, and most importantly, staying in shape. 1. Make some kind of workout a priority. Set in your mind that you will work out on a regular basis. Whether it’s 6 a.m. or 8 p.m., get in some activity, even if it’s only for 15 minutes. The way your body looks and feels will follow with consistency and dedication. This probably holds true for most other things in life, as well. If it’s important to you to look your best in your wedding dress, make decisions in alignment with that. .
2. Mix it up and get creative. 4. Do not buy your wedding dress to fit the shape you I’ve had the best results want to be; buy it to fit you. from participating in a variety At the risk of sounding of different kinds of workouts – stretching and lifting, burst cliché, you are beautiful the cardio and jump training, way you are. The man you are LDS running (long, slow dis- marrying would agree, and if tance), yoga, barre, kickbox- he wouldn’t, kick him to the ing, etc. There are so many curb. Each woman’s beauty is choices, and not only is it different; we are all striking for good for your body to mix it different reasons. The comup, but you’ll have fun trying parison game will leave you new things. Tailor your work- frustrated, tired and empty. I out schedule to what you en- do understand wanting to look joy. There are so many ways to your best, but at the end of the be active; you’re bound to like day, stressing over missing a one of them. Personally, I’m a workout or eating something runner, and that is my favor- you probably shouldn’t have ite form of exercise, with yoga isn’t worth it. I also understand if you are being a close second. Also, any outside activity automati- skeptical. This is easy to say, cally trumps any other, for me. but not easy to put into pracYour workout schedule should tice. However, let me assure reflect what you enjoy, because you, on your wedding day, you if you don’t enjoy your work- are beautiful because of the outs, you probably won’t keep event that’s taking place. You are the focus, the prize and the doing them. one who catches everyone’s eye, regardless of your dress 3. Rest. size. Will everyone be lookRest is a huge challenge for ing at the definition in your me, but everyone needs to do triceps, or will they be lookit. Listen to your body. There ing at the emotion that spreads is a big difference between rest- across your face as you enter ing and being lazy, and a fine into a perfect covenant with line between pushing yourself another imperfect human beand depleting yourself. Walk- ing? Allow this to encourage ing down the aisle with an injury isn’t worth shedding a patience and grace in your athfew pounds before you tie the letic feats. Remember to have knot. The muscles you are fun during your wedding seatearing down when you exer- son. You will cherish this time cise needs time, food and wa- for the rest of your life. ter on a regular basis to repair and become stronger.
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f you consider yourself a techie, maintain your techie status at your wedding by trying some of these ideas.
Stand out on social media. A wedding hashtag will allow you to find all the photos your friends and family posted on social media during your wedding, and even the days or months leading up to it. Here are the steps to creating your own wedding hashtag. 1. Come up with a hashtag that is unique to your day. It must be unique! Something like #KarenAndDarrylGetHitched. If it’s not unique, you will get results from other people when you try to search for the photos later. A quick online search will tell you if your hashtag is in use by anyone else. 2. Tell your guests what your hashtag is. You could post it on your wedding website and have it on a sign at the ceremony or reception. Encourage your guests to post photos on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram of special moments they witness. You can even have them start early and use the hashtag when you’re preparing for the big day. Keep in mind that if people have private profiles on the social media site, you won’t be able to see their posts when searching, even if
Staff Picks: Top 5 Wedding Favors 1. Mini Champagne Bottles 2. Lotto Tickets 3. Homemade Jam Or Honey 4. Bottle Openers 5. Lip Balm
The High Tech Bride
ding in the techie history books. Although drones can be expensive, cheaper ones are available, or you might have a friend who can loan you one.
Go Pro Bouquet
Go Pro cameras are all the rage right now, and they can be put into the bridal bouquet to capture special moments of the ceremony you won’t otherwise have on video. Go Pros can be placed on almost anything to have candid videos of the wedding party or guests. A lot of people even put the cameras on their pets. Video of your wedding will allow you to experience your special day on a meaningful level.
While technology can be handy, there are places when smartphones and other technology should be used with care, such as your wedding ceremony. While guests might think they’re doing you a favor by snapping photos throughout the ceremony, smartphones might get in the way of the professional photographer or videographer you have hired for thousands of dollars. Keep in mind that technology should be used mindfully at your wedding so as not to take anything away from experiencing they use your hashtag. Selfie Booth your special day. 3. After the wedding, go to FaInstead of renting a photo cebook, Twitter and Instagram and booth, buy a selfie stick and put an search for your hashtag. If your old phone or iPod in it. Put a sign guests cooperated, you will see lots up that tells everyone they can take of pictures from your wedding day a selfie. Your guests are guaranteed that you probably missed. You can to have fun with it, and it’ll be aweeven save them and create a photo- some to look at the pictures later, book to have for years to come. or perhaps even create a collage or 4. This step is optional. If book with them. you’re really tech savvy, create a Drone Photos page on your wedding website that Drones are great for any type of pulls all the photos tagged with outdoor photography, but even one your hashtag from around the web. aerial shot of your wedding would Cody Crawford holds a Bachelor It will save you the extra steps of be something most people don’t get of Science in Computer Engineerchecking each social media site in- to see. Not only can they snap pic- ing Technology from Middle Tendividually, and you can direct your tures that humans aren’t able to get, nessee State University and serves family and friends to that page as a drone will also cement your wed- as Director of Digital Innovation for Validity Publishing. well, so they can join in the fun. Validitymag.com 27 . Ashley Chapman/AOC Photography
By Cody Crawford
Marriage Isn’t A Nicholas Sparks Movie
marriage and I’ve learned that reallife love stories look a lot different than the movies. Sure, they have their moments of romance and passion, but they are mostly forged through determination, patience, forgiveness, trust, selflessness, faith and friendship. That’s the stuff real marriages are made of. When I counsel young couples before their wedding day, I usually tell them something along these lines: “Listen, you won’t always feel the way you feel about each other right now. Emotions ebb and flow, romantic feelings come and go, so it’s important that your relationship be based on more than romance.” They never believe me. They nod their heads in agreement, but they are too busy making googly eyes at each other to listen. On a few occasions, they have come back to me after three to five years of marriage and said, “I see what you mean now. We wish we had invested more time in building our friendship than maintaining our romance.” It’s good advice. And if you want to build a strong and lasting marriage, I recommend the same thing. Friendships endure when romance fades. It’s not that romance is a bad thing. It’s just that a lot of cou-
f o o r P
tor raits of the Bride and
Add a Touch of Class to your Special Day
hile I have never read a Nicholas Sparks novel and have only seen a grand total of one of his films, I understand the basic plotline. Two good-looking people fall in love, they encounter some sort of obstacle or conflict that makes being together seem imposBy Russ sible, against Adcox all odds they overcome and end up kissing in the rain (or dancing in the street or rowing in the boat or take your pick). Bottom line is everyone falls in love and lives happily ever after. In Sparks’ reality, every love story ends in romance and every romance exists in this magical combination of inspiration and passion that provides unlimited feelings of happiness. It’s a nice sentiment and it does make for a good story, but I’m sorry folks. It’s not real. You do know Nicholas Sparks got divorced last year, right? I’m not trying to sound calloused here. It’s just that I’m one day shy of celebrating 20 years of
Contact the artist at: (931) 626-2743 or Email: firstname.lastname@example.org .
ples go into marriage with unbelievably high expectations in this department. And when they anticipate a marriage of perpetual happiness and endless relational bliss, they set themselves up for disappointment. Esther Perel says it best in her TED talk when she explains how we’ve “brought happiness down from the heavens” when it comes to marriage and “made it first a possibility, and today, it’s a mandate.” Sadly, she’s right, and it explains why many couples end their relationship prematurely. They lament that they “just aren’t happy anymore” or they “just aren’t in love anymore.” What they are really saying is that they don’t feel the same way as when the relationship first began, and they don’t know how to handle it. Simply put, their marriage is crumbling under the weight of unrealistic expectations. We can blame Jerry Maguire for this one. Remember the iconic scene with Tom Cruise and Renee Zellweger when he tells her “you complete me,” and everyone swoons? That’s what many people are looking for today in their relationships—someone who will bring them continual happiness. Some researchers call it the “soul-mate” model of marriage. We want someone who will meet our every emotional need and fulfill our every romantic desire. Sorry, but once again, that’s the stuff of make-believe. If we expect our love story to read like the plot of a Nicholas Sparks novel, we’re begging for discontentment. As Anne Lamott so bluntly put it, “expectations are resentments waiting to happen.” In other words, keep things in perspective and temper your expectations with the fact that your partners aren’t characters in a movie. They are real people with real flaws, and they will let you down sometimes. So cut them some slack, and save yourself the heartbreak of lingering resentment. The bottom line is this. You don’t have a soul-mate. You have a spouse. Be faithful to them. You don’t have a
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story-book ending. You have a story that’s still being written. Keep writing it. And you don’t only have a lover. You have a friend. Keep working on that aspect of marriage and the love will endure. Russ grew up in Hohenwald and now lives in Columbia where he’s the minister of Maury Hills Church. He’s married to Jenny and they have three children (Lilly, Halle and Roman). For more of his writings, visit www. russadcox.com
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No bride should be without a copy of Emily Post’s Wedding Etiquette. Whether you’re looking for a classic, traditional wedding with all the proper accoutrements, or a more casual affair surrounded by a small group of those closest to you, questions could arise as to proper etiquette. Emily Post’s advice is timeless.
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The Everything Wedding Organizer: Checklists, Charts, And Worksheets For Planning The Perfect Day!
Emily Post’s Wedding Etiquette
t’s the wedding issue! I’ll never forget watching my beautiful bride coming down the aisle sixteen years ago this month, hoping she wouldn’t see the mismatched shirts of the groomsmen. I stood there with a smile on my face and fear in my heart, wondering to myself what was going to happen when we got to the reception and she noticed the cake that was delivered was not the one we ordered. It was a stressful day. It would have been much less stressful if we had these fine books to help guide us. The perfect wedding takes months of planning, thousands of decisions and the advice of every expert you can find. Here are a few books to help you plan your big day.
The Groom’s Instruction Manual: How To Survive And Possibly Enjoy The Most Bewildering Ceremony Known To Man
By Shandon Fowler After helping his wife plan a traditional Southern wedding with 500 guests, held under a giant oak tree at the home of his mother-in-law, in Beaufort, South Carolina, Shandon Fowler realized guys needed a “how-to” manual to navigate the minefield of the most important day of their lives. So to those of you planning this most important of days, from all of us at The Old Curiosity Book Shop, may your marriage be filled with love, laughter and literature! You can find copies of each of these books at The Old Curiosity Book Shop on the square in downtown Columbia, or at your favorite indie bookstore. Remember to support your local indie shops, restaurants and publications. We appreciate each one of you! James Lund, along with his wife Heather, own The Old Curiosity Book Shop in downtown Columbia, Tennessee. A native of Nashville, James moved to Columbia several years ago to get away from crowds and promptly opened a business whose purpose is to attract crowds.
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Blooming In The Garden
Love, Marriage And Life
Nature’s splendor in a garden is a lovely, natural setting for love and marriage. Inspirational, heavenly, romantic, enchanting, tranquil, blissfully serene and delightful are the feelings that can wash over you when you are in the midst of a vibrant, beautiful garden that is well tended and cared for. You can see and feel the love blooming in a garden. So it is, with a relationship that is tended and cared for as it blooms in love. It is beautiful to see and feel. Being in the midst of an exquisite garden with lush shades of green surrounded by the beauty of delicate flowers, one can easily understand the natural connection there with love and marriage. A garden setting for a wedding can be naturally spectacular or wildly rustic and many themes in between. Your wedding day is one of the most special and exciting days
of your life. And it’s the beginning Huie day of the rest of your life together “The greatest lovers are like to grow and bloom full of love, joy twin blooms, each reflecting the and happiness. passion and glory of the other.” – Jonathan Lockwood Huie Quotes For Love, Marriage “Grow old along with me, the and Life best is yet to be.” – Robert Brown“Where there is love, nothing ing is missing.” – Jonathan Lockwood
New Year is beginning and changes are sure to come. We create daily memories that we cherish throughout our lives as we grow and bloom. It seems fitting that the Bridal issue of Validity is pubBy Cassandra Warner lished at the beginning of the New Year, full of inspiration and information to help design and create a beautiful, memorable day. The biggest, most wonderful change in one’s life is to marry and be bound with love as one, to grow and bloom in life together. It also seems fitting, that the beauty of a garden or nature setting, whether a big or small wedding, is a perfect place to begin life with your soulmate.
the truth, love to complete your life.” – Anonymous Bountiful, Beautiful Blooms
There are so many, beautiful flowers you can choose that you might want in a garden for a wedding or for floral arrangements and bouquets. Here are just a few of the beauties.
*Big-Leaf Hydrangea, lovely lush blooms. *Peony, perfect bowls of petals. *Bearded Irises, a rainbow of colors to choose. *Wisterias, elegant shades of violet blooms in cascading clusters. *Canna Lily, exquisite. *Rhododendrons, dramatic. *Roses, spectacular.
*Azaleas, vibrant colors and delicate floral beauty. *Butterfly bushes, a profusion of showy blossoms. *Snowflakes, old-fashioned, dainty and delicate. *Viburnums, abundant, fluffy clouds of blooms in white or pale pink.
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yarrow, day lilies, spi- and the birds, and the freezing will der wort, butterfly help break up heavy, dirt clods. *If you see little, green shoots weed, gaillardia. starting to sprout from some of Out In The Garden In your bulbs, thinking spring is alwww.ValidityMag.com January ready on the way because of some *Don’t work the of the warm days we have had, add Perennials That Rise To The soil if it is wet or frozen, a little compost and more mulch to Occasion but if you need to turn it, this is a protect the tender new growth. Iris, bleeding hearts, clematis, good time to do that. It will expose *Check for frost heaving on pecone flower, daises, columbines, insect eggs to the winter weather
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the miracle of a single flower clearly, our whole life would change.” – Planting...as Long As The Ground Buddha Is Not Frozen! “More grows in the garden than *Bare root trees, shrubs and the gardener sows.” – Old Spanish roses. Proverb *Continue to plant or trans“And when your back stops plant trees, shrubs and perennials. aching and your hands begin to *If you haven’t planted garlic harden, you will find yourself a yet, do it NOW. partner in the Glory of the Garden.” – Rudyard Kipling worms (Spindle shaped cocoons). (BT). More Things To Do “Who loves a garden still his Hand pick and burn them, or in *After a hard freeze, water or*Save ashes from the fireplace Eden keeps, perennial pleasures the spring as soon as eggs hatch, namental cabbage and pansies. or wood stove. Use as a good source plants and wholesome harvest spray with Bacillus Thuringiensis This will help to rehydrate their of potash. Use on plants that reaps,” – Amos Bronson Alcott prefer alkaline soil. Sprinkle it “All that in this delightful gararound onions, carrots and rad- den grows, should happy be and ishes to keep root maggots away have immortal bliss.” – Edmond and when planting potatoes, it Spencer will improve their flavor. Add “A garden is a lovesome thing!” some to the compost pile. – Thomas Edward Brown *Start a new garden journal. With a bright New Year before *Look at your winter landscape and garden to see where you might add evergreens, color, hardscape or lights to add to winter interest. wilted leaves.
“Flowers always make people better, happier and more helpful: They are sunshine, food and medicine to the soul.” - Luther Burbank “If we could see
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us to make of it what we will, let our lives and our gardens be full of love, blooms and good food! Originally from Texas, Cassandra Warner is a transplant to the garden of Tennessee. Gardening has been one of her passions for forty years. “Gardening connects you to the miracle of life and provides healthy exercise and stress relief.”
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ave you ever prerecorded a sports event, say a football game, to watch after it was over? You disciplined yourself not to know who won and threatened harm to anyone who “spilled the beans.” It is intriguing to follow a prerecorded game, knowing the outcome has already been determined, yet not knowing it. We are in such a time as this with all the conflicts, uncertainties, tragedies and evils going on in our By Charles E. world. Terror is Newbold, Jr. banging its fist on the doors of the hearts of multitudes. What does the future hold? Will we be the next victims? What will happen to all those displaced people in war-torn countries? Should we be having a nervous breakdown? Do we win or lose in the end? The answer to this last question depends on whose side we are. From a battle-of-two-kingdom’s point of view (the Kingdom of Light and Kingdom of Darkness), there is a losing side and a winning side. Paul, the apostle, wrote, “What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?” Romans 8:31. Dare we say God is on the side of those who play on His team? Consider what God has said of Himself. “For I am God, and there is no other; I am God, and there is none like Me, declaring the end from the beginning, and from ancient times things that are not yet done, saying, ‘My counsel shall stand, and I will do all My pleasure.’” Isaiah. 46:9-10. God knows the end from the beginning because He declared it. He is the Creator. He sits in heaven and does as He pleases. Psalms 115:3. Revelation is the last book in the Bible. It reveals the end. I read it and guess what? We won! Good news for
those whose names are written in the book of life and bad news for those whose names are not. Revelations 31:27. Best be on the right team, partner! I love the promise in Romans 8:28, “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.” And this verse in 2 Timothy 1:12, “For this reason I also suffer these things; nevertheless I am not ashamed, for I know whom I have believed and am persuaded that He is able to keep what I have committed to Him until that Day.” We can declare victory before the end of the game because we know the end has already been determined. Although, what is going on today is no game! If we are on God’s side, we win, but that does not call for excessive celebration in the end zone. Unlike our football game, we are saddened for those who lost. There may be rivalry in Satan’s camp, but not in the Lord’s. Our hearts are aligned with God our Savior who desires all men be saved and come to the knowledge of truth. 2 Timothy 2:4. All men! Including those who would kill us! Nevertheless, we allay our fears for the future knowing that God knows the end from the beginning and has told us as much. Though we may go through the valley of the shadow of death, we will fear no evil. He is with us and prepares a table before us in the presence of our enemies. Psalm 23. Therefore, Let us “press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 3:14. Charles Elliott Newbold, Jr. has served as pastor, teacher and is an author calling forth Christians to live the laid-down life for Jesus Christ. He and his wife, Nancy McDonald Newbold, live in Knoxville, Tennessee, where Charles continues his writing.
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FEED THE BIRDS
’ve written several times in the past about how to manage and improve the bird habitat on your own property, whether you have a small lot in town or large rural acreage. This is the most important part of making your home friendly to the wild By Bill Pulliam birds. I’ve talked about the basic ideas of food, water, shelter and habitat complexity, and how they give more different birds more of what they need to live their lives year-round. This month, I am going to focus on just one part of this bigger scheme: bird feeders. For many people, the bird feeder comes first. And it is true, that if you stick up any random feeder at any random place and fill it with any random “wild bird seed,” you will have birds coming to it. But if you place your feeder more carefully, and select what to fill it with more carefully, it will be a bigger help to wider varieties of native bird species. There are two problems that come up with artificial bird feeding. The first is cleanliness. Neglected feeders can get dirty and the seeds inside can spoil, which can sicken and kill the birds that visit them. The second is that badlyplace feeders filled with low-quality seed mixes can mostly benefit introduced, invasive, pest species like House Sparrows and Starlings and actually can be detrimental to the native birds like bluebirds, woodpeckers and chickadees. Starlings and House Sparrows are essentially “feathered rats” that were brought here from Europe, thrive mostly around people and
crowd out other birds. You don’t want to encourage them any more than you want to deliberately feed the house mice and roof rats. So, Rule Number One for feeding the birds: Do not, ever, ever, ever, really, never use those yellow “wild bird food” seed mixes. Sure, they are cheap, but you get what you pay for. They are mostly low-quality seeds, agricultural byproducts. They attract undesirable birds in swarms. The community of birds in your yard would be better off if you fed them nothing than if you give them that stuff. So what do you feed instead? The two good options are sunflower seeds and thistle seeds. Of course sunflower seeds are more expensive, and thistle seeds can be even more pricey. But again, you get what you pay for. Sunflower seeds are a good general-purpose winter bird feed. Titmice, chickadees, cardinals, woodpeckers and many other native birds like them. Thistle seeds are very small and require a special thistle feeder. They cater particularly to smaller seedeaters like goldfinches. Sometimes you will get a large swarm of regular visitors to your feeder, and you will feel like they are trying to break your bank, emptying your feeders three times a day. Don’t be tempted to revert to cheaper seed mixes to save money. The fact is, once the birds know your feeder is there, you can let it run empty, and they will not forsake you forever. So long as you put something in it once a day, they will find it and return. So, decide how much you can spend, buy good quality seed with that money and give the birds their daily portion. They’ll be fine the rest of the day, foraging for wild food sources
and other feeders. Now for Rule Number Two for wild bird feeding: Keep your feeders clean. This rule is often neglected. Dirty feeders are like dirty kitchens and can spread fatal disease among wild birds. Salmonella and mold grow in damp, dirty feeders and food stores and can infect the birds that use them. So here are the rules: Store your bird feed in a clean, dry place. Don’t contaminate your new seed with old seed. Use up the last bag entirely before opening the next bag, and don’t store seed over the summer. Clean your feeders with hot water regularly. Weekly is best. Unless they are especially dirty, no soap is needed. Diluted bleach should only be used if you have actually seen sick birds; otherwise it runs a risk of contamination. Another note here under cleanliness refers to suet cakes, peanuts and peanut butter. Many birds love these, and if used carefully, they can attract a wider variety of birds. However, cleanliness and freshness are important for these. In mild or wet weather, they can quickly spoil and become deadly. Finally, Rule Number Three: Location, location, location. Being a small, tasty morsel in the wild is a dangerous business. Birds are constantly on the alert for danger and avoid places where they judge the risk to be too high. They are also shy of doorways and other places where people appear too often. So placing your feeder is a balancing act. These are the things you need to balance: 1) In a place that you can see
it well and service it easily, but not too close to the places people are always passing through. 2) In a place that is close enough to cover (tree, bush) so the birds can flee if a threat approaches, but not so close to cover that a predator (cat, hawk) can spring onto the feeder. Imagine yourself to be a small bird. Would you be afraid that a cat might be hiding too close? Or would you feel like you were too exposed and in the open so that you would have no chance to get to safety if a hawk appeared? Remember, bird feeders are actually more for the benefit of people than birds. We may feel like we are helping take care of them. But the balance between the benefit of the extra food and the costs of disease transmission, vulnerability to predators and encouraging the introduced pest species is difficult. Our native birds do fine in most winters without supplemental feeding, and the best thing you can do for them is to improve your habitat rather than directly offer them food. But if you manage your feeders well, you can draw the birds in close for your enjoyment and make your feeders a benign part of their environment. Bill Pulliam got started in birdwatching by his junior high science teacher in 1974, and has been an avid birder ever since in 48 U.S. states and 7 foreign countries. He is currently the Tennessee editor for eBird, a online project that compiles millions of observations from tens of thousands of birders around the world.
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To Cuss or Not To Cuss
t was just a matter of time. “Cerebral Meandering,” the beloved title for this pathetic, literary nonsense, has finally been plagiarized. Possibly, without malice intent, of course, I may have pirated the phrase in the beginning myself. After all, nothing new under the internet sun. In t e n s e l y By Shane Newbold feeling the urge to curse after the copyright infringement, I refrained from vociferating expletives and expeditiously penned, “Unconscionable Cogitation.” The expression equally and effectively elucidates what is going on inside my cranium as well as “Cerebral Meandering” did. “Curse” is much too formal, so until the end (if you actually read this to the end), “cuss” will be used. And that is the gist of this month’s article: To cuss or not cuss, therein lies a problem.
C e r t a i n l y, when you bump or strike any appendages to cause injury, cussing is allowable. If you think you will end up at the hospital, the more profane and loudly you cuss, the more effective the mental therapy. Because cussing, like ice cream, can make you feel better. So, when you hurt yourself, “to cuss or not to cuss” is NOT the question. The level of intensity while cussing is the issue. Recently, the med school son showed up at the door for the family, Thanksgiving holiday. “My good, soon-to-be-physician son is home!” the ecstatic father yelled to the rest of the family. Upon greeting his progeny, there was trouble in paradise. “Dad, meet my new bride, Bambi,” the son bragged. Struggling to not glare at his new, attractive and lewdly dressed daughter-inlaw, the father whispered to his son, “Don’t take this the wrong way, but she looks like she just left the strip club.” “Yeah, it’s cool isn’t it,” the son retorted. “Bambi is an athlete. You should see her moves on the pole. I now believe in love at first sight.” “And it’s an exclusive club. The mayor, councilmen and local CEOs are regulars. You taught me well, dad, hobnobbing with fat cats and
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good ol’ boys!” the son crowed. “Oh, and I want you to meet my new stepson, Skull,” he declared like a proud parent. Again, the father whispered to the son, “Skull?” “Yeah dad, he acquired the nickname while incarcerated in juvenile detention for armed robbery with a stolen gun,” the son explained. Trying to maintain civility, the father asked the only question that popped into his now beginningto-heat-up brain. “So, Skull, is there any part of your body not tattooed?” Bambi immediately responded, “Hey Skull, drop your pants and show him where there ain’t no tattoo.” “NO, NO, NO, I was only making small talk!” the father sheepishly squealed. “Anyway,” the father continued, “thank you for not dropping your pants. And how old are you, Skull?” Bambi again hastily replied, “He’s fourteen and a half and will be fifteen next week.” The father uttered to his son, “Okay, I guess that math works.” Interrupting and finally engaging in conversation, Skull solicited his new stepgrandparent, “Yo, bro granddaddy, my new stepdad dude said you gotta lotta sweet bang bangs. You is the first stepgranddad to have any. I might wanna take a look, see what you got.” Taken aback, the father responded, “Well, Skull, if I had guns, I certainly would not let strangers take a look. And how many stepgrandfathers have you had?” Skull started counting on his fingers, then replied, “About four or seven.” The father uttered to his son again, “More higher math. Could I talk to you in private?” Face turning red and smoke coming from his ears, the father asked his son, “Am I missing something here?” The son naively divulged his ulterior motives, “Well, dad, the reason I came home is to tell you that I quit med school, and Bambi and I are moving to Vegas, and I’m
going to start day trading, and the money you will not spend because I’m not in med school you can give to us for Skull’s bond and defense lawyer, because Bambi told me her son is innocent...” We all know where this goes. Cussing, screaming and writhing in the fetal position in his back yard is an understandable outcome for the poor father. Who possibly can judge the language spewing from his mouth. Certainly not I. Cuss on, dear man. Cuss on. However, for many, foul words never flow from their lily lips. And for many more, cussing is downright offensive. Charles Newbold, my dad, authors the “how to walk by the spirit with Jesus” article in Validity. In no uncertain terms, he threatened to boycott the magazine, along with all his cronies, if I used any more cuss words in my articles. Yes, he threatened his own son. His daughter-in-law, my wife and publisher, sided with him. Believe me, conspiracies are real. And I am being robbed of my free speech rights by a bunch of Bible-thumping, high minded hypocrites. Dad cursed one time when someone dashed the pungent smoldering of his illegal Cuban cigar. But worse, is before the not-sosweet wife has her morning, double shot espresso. Lord, have mercy. C’mon man (and woman)! Sometimes you just gotta let it loose. To no avail, I am outnumbered. Profanity no more from pure, little me in this virtuous publication. More importantly, since the queen conspirator is holding my weekly allowance over my head, I value my @*^# money more than my pride and potty mouth. Father to four and best friend to Becky Jane for 28 years, Shane Newbold lives life to the fullest fishing and enjoying his family.
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