Chocbombs Taste Test: Windsor Cinema Ryan Suckling and Ruth Thomas Four Pelican editors and a close friend (and intern) travelled to the Windsor Cinema to conduct a comprehensive review of the Chocbomb menu. After discovering that HOKEY POKEY and SALTED CARAMEL were unavailable, we selected ten of the fourteen flavours on offer: Harry (BOYSENBERRY and CAPPUCINO), Tess (MINT and MACADAMIA), Ryan (RUM AND RAISIN and MANGO), Ruth (VANILLA and CHOCOLATE), and Skye (COOKIES AND CREAM and STRAWBERRY). HARRY: How do you eat these? I’ve never understood them as a movie food. TESS: They’re very heavy. And messy. RUTH: The chocolate coating makes them less messy than a normal ice-cream. TESS: I think the main reason I came today was because I can never afford to buy food at cinemas, so this was an amazing opportunity for me. My grandpa once took my whole family to see Avatar, we don’t get along with him and he tried to buy his way into our hearts. He spent $100 on cinema food. I got a massive slushy, and on my way to the cinema I dropped it on the floor and he said, “I’ll get you another one” and I was like “damn right you will.” HARRY: I’m not sure about the lolly on the top – it’s very hard, I think they do it for utilitarian purposes, to identify the flavours, which is sort of like a metaphor for society in a way. SKYE: Does it worry you that this is the cookie they use to indicate that it’s Cookies and Cream ice-cream inside? It’s a plain Arnott’s biscuit. HARRY: There’s a distinct lack of boysenberry in this – it’s more of a vanilla, with a streak of berry. I don’t want to be too negative. I like it. RYAN: You can definitely detect the rum. And who runs out of Salted Caramel? HARRY: Maybe something bad happened. RYAN: But if it’s their most popular flavour surely they’d just want to churn it out? SKYE: [Melted chocolate coating from the Chocbomb has fallen onto her pants]. This was a bad idea [she is referring to being here]. RUTH: This is what I worry would happen in a cinema. If you were on a date, you’d be like oh no. HARRY: I think movie theatres are bad places for dates. At least in the early stages. TESS: Same. I went on a date the other day. We went to Utopia (got bubble tea), went to Elizabeth Quay and sat there for a while, we went to the art gallery, then we went and played snooker. HARRY: That’s a really good date. RYAN: I want it on record that I’m the first to finish a Chocbomb. TESS: Well done! You get another Chocbomb. HARRY: I like the music they play here. Everyone be quiet whilst I Shazam this song. [Ryan begins tasting the MANGO Chocbomb. Harry and Tess also start tasting their second Chocbombs – TOFFEE and MACADAMIA respectively]. TESS: My whole body is telling me to stop eating, but my love for Pelican is telling me to eat more. This is every lactose intolerant person’s nightmare. HARRY: I’m taking a break. What movies are even on right now? A Trip to Spain? RYAN: That is not good. It’s shit [referring to the MANGO Chocbomb]. It’s so bad. It’s tropical. It’s like eating a sorbet. HARRY: What is toffee? Is it just sugar? It’s too hard to eat, it’s not happening. [A few minutes later, the ice-cream is more edible]. I don’t know if it tastes like toffee, it tastes more like coffee. I love coffee, but I don’t want my icecream to be coffee flavoured, that’s something only old people get. I like old people. The way they dress, their vibe.
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