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Imprint The university of Waterloo’s official student newspaper

vol 29, no 23

imprint . uwaterloo . ca

Friday, January 19, 2007

Waterloo’s Past revisited see page 14 to 15

Warriors tie, then win see page 25

Waterloo hullabaloo — “Why Not?”

Valerie Leigh Broadbent

UW faculty members, students, alumni and guests celebrate the University’s 50th anniversary by hula-hooping back the 1950s between more formal events.

Students born outside of Canada may lose citizenship status after age 28 Narmeen Lakhani assistant news editor

The Government of Canada is beginning to enforce a section from its 1977 Citizenship Act jeopardizing the citizenship status of many young Canadians born outside of Canada after 1977. Part II of the Citizenship Act, last updated in December 2006, requires

some Canadians to reapply for their citizenship. Anyone who attained citizenship rights from their parents and who was born outside of Canada after February 14, 1977 to parents also born outside of Canada falls into this category. These Canadian citizens are proclaimed to lose their citizenship as of their 28th birthday unless they apply to retain it. Any such person must also

“[register] as a citizen and either [reside] in Canada for a period of at least one year immediately preceding the date of his application or [establish] a substantial connection with Canada.” According to the Edmonton Sun, some people could become “stateless” through the enforcement of this section of the Citizenship Act. This would be the scenario if a Canadian loses his citizenship and his country

of birth does not provide the alternate citizenship. The reason Section 8 of the Citizenship Act was not a great concern for Canadians until recently is simply because the provision first became effective February 15, 2005, the completion of 28 years since the Act was created. Citizenship and Immigration Canada is adding an expiration date to


all citizenship certificates issued as of January 1, 2007, that require an application for retention under this category. CIC’s Operational Bulletin 024 also explains: “Once they successfully apply to retain citizenship, they will be issued a citizenship certificate without an expiry date and a certificate of retention.” See CITIZENSHIP, page 5

Please mail cover letter, resume, writing samples to: Imprint Publications, Imprint, the University of Waterloo’s CCNA award-winning student newspaper is looking for an Waterloo, Attn: Jeff Anstett, University of editor-in-chief. The position demands a high level of journalism knowledge, basic knowledge of Waterloo, 200 University Avenue W., Student photography principles and excellent leadership skills. Life Centre, room 1116, Waterloo, Ontario, N2L 3G1 A post-secondary degree in journalism or a related field is ideal. Ability to work with and teach Adobe CS2, The deadline is Wed, January 31, especially InDesign and Photoshop, and general administrative computer usage is essential. Familiarity with 2007. Pagemaker, QuarkXPress, Unix/Linux is a definite asset. Other qualifications include a willingness to work in a fast-paced environment with occasional unconventional hours.

Friday, january 19, 2007 News Editor: Suzanne Gardner News Assistant: Narmeen Lakhani

News Imprint

Bus pass debate boils over Dinh Nguyen staff reporter


MICHAEL L. DAvenport

Although the bus system is popular with some students, the U-Pass nevertheless remains a controversial issue on campus. Michael L. Davenport staff reporter

This week what started out as a “resurfacing” of an old issue quickly became a hot button topic: the universal bus pass (U-Pass). At the Feds council meeting on January 14, Feds president Michelle Zakrison introduced a motion to bring the question of a non-refundable bus pass to referendum. However, this motion was immediately superseded by a motion introduced by Feds vice president education Jeff Henry, which would send the bus pass issue back to committee so Feds could investigate the possibility of a refundable pass. This motion was welcomed by Zakrison, who had already been looking into the possibility of a refundable pass. Feds voted to send the issue back to committee, with 16 for, 3 against, and 0 abstaining. Though it may appear the councillors were voting on a refundable versus non-refundable pass, that is not how many saw the issue. Many councillors made statements at the meeting lamenting the lack of undecided details in the proposal. Would the bus pass be valid in the summer term? How would the outlined route improvements be concretely decided upon? Those questions remained unanswered throughout the entire meeting, and many felt uncomfortable voting for a proposal that wasn’t fleshed out. “Essentially, the work should have been done by the motion’s mover and it should have been done earlier,” arts

councillor Kate Daley told Imprint. “It wasn’t, and thus Council sent it back to the executive for the sort of detailed analysis that is worthy of a multi-million dollar decision.” So Feds council failed to bring the issue to referendum for the time being. However, there are four ways in which a referendum can be initiated. A referendum can be initiated by a council vote, by a vote at a general meeting, by the board of directors or by petition. It seems it is frequently this fourth method which is most accessible to the average student — or even students sitting on council. Feds environmental studies councillor Drew Adams vowed he would circulate a petition if the motion for a non-refundable U-Pass referendum failed. He made good on his promise, gathering between 2,200 and 2,500 signatures since the council meeting — impressive considering Monday was a snow day. Adams explained why he pressed the issue. “If Feds takes the time, and before they take the time look into a refundable system — they’d spend another year looking for the system. There won’t be a referendum this election, it’d be lucky to go to referendum next election. A referendum, yes, could be called at any time, but everybody sitting in the room at the students’ council meeting [last Sunday] knows that a referendum will not be called by Feds until an election.” Adams pointed out that Feds could agree to a non-refundable bus pass for a year trial period while the

have WatCards.) While a refundable pass would make car-commuters happier, it would be more expensive for those that used it and could further complicate logistics. Though Adams collected enough signatures to force the referendum, the petition has yet to be officially submitted. One of the first things Feds would have to do is verify all the signatures on the petition against a list of full-time students provided by the registrar’s office. But since open enrolment only ended January 16, that list may take some time in coming. See REFERENDUM, page 5


• financial security for Feds and GRT

• get it if you want it, opt out if you don’t

• easy to administer

• difficult to authenticate students • car commuters, walkers don’t benefit

details of the refundable pass were worked out. “If they’re looking at spending another year looking for the system that people have been wanting for like, about eight years, why don’t we just give them a system that’s not the perfect system — I would not argue for a second that this would be the perfect system — but it’s a system, and people want the system.” There are pros and cons to both the refundable and non-refundable bus passes. Both passes would require the driver verify that the bearer had paid the fee, which unlike Laurier could not simply be verified by showing a student card (since part time students, grad students and alumni all


Obesity doesn’t just lead to sex problems amongst humans; apparently, it can have the same effect on pandas as well. After countless hours of holding a mock wedding, arranging a separation to spark up romance, and talking about introducing panda porn to get panda couple Chuang Chuang and Lin Hui “in the mood,” Thai zoo authorities have come to the conclusion that the male panda, Chuang Chuang, is overweight. “Chuang Chuang is gaining weight too fast and we found Lin Hui is no longer comfortable with having sex with him,” said, Kanika Limtrakul, the zoo’s chief veterinarian on Chron news, adding that “Chuang Chuang weighed 331 pounds while Lin Hui is only 253 pounds.” As a result, Chuang Chuang has been put on a strict diet, cutting bamboo stems out of his meal, leaving only the leaves. According to the Associated Press, Thailand rented the panda pair from China in October 2003 at $250,000 for 10 years, as a plan to make them mate, create babies and generate millions of tourist dollars. Unfortunately, their master intentions have so far been unsuccessful, as it is extremely difficult to produce panda offspring. It’s that or the zoo is just heading in the wrong direction. Maybe the pandas need marriage counseling — or perhaps they’re just not interested in the opposite sex.



What do Quentin Tarantino characters and the resident American biscuit makers have in common? They both want to Kill Bill. Recently, a post office in White Plains was evacuated by Secret Service agents and the local bomb squad. The cause? An alarming parcel of cookies addressed to former U.S. president, Bill Clinton, and his senator wife Hilary. Before being opened, the package was deemed “suspicious” because of its incorrect mailing address. This triggered the internal bomb threat instinct in U.S. postal employees. According to the Canadian Press, after evacuating the office, a member of the bomb squad, dressed in protective gear, used a portable X-ray device to scan the parcel. When it was apparent that no bomb was present, the package was opened, revealing a box of cookies. The cookies were then handed over to Secret Services as they let employees back in, reopening the post office. No information regarding the cookie-sender’s identity was released. But whoever they are must be dangerous. If they could bang, bang, shut a post office down with just cookies, think of what they could do with a katana.

REFUNDABLE CON: • difficult to authenticate students • liability for feds, could lose money on refunds • difficult to administer


FRIDAY, january 19, 2007

Region makes plans to move by bus or by rail Adam Gardiner staff reporter

The Region of Waterloo is preparing to take its transit system into the future — and it’s going to be either by bus or rail. In a series of public meetings held last week, the Region gave its citizens the opportunity to offer their comments and suggestions on two proposals for a rapid transit system which will provide mass transportation between and within the tri-cities. The first, dubbed Bus Rapid Transit or BRT, would use a fleet of buses operating in a series of laneways constructed exclusively for their use. The second proposal, known as Light Rail Transit or LRT, would use either hybrid or fully

electric vehicles traveling on railway lines, like streetcars. The Region is recommending that the new transit system, in either case, should operate both on and off of the existing roadways. Although some members of the public expressed the desire to see other forms of transportation worked into the new system, the response was very positive overall. “We had out [in Cambridge] between 35 to 40 people,” commented project manager Yanick Cyr to the Cambridge Times, “and their responses favour our assessment.” Although the Region initially identified 10 choices of transport for the new system including a monorail, commuter rail and subway, they narrowed their choices down to the BRT and LRT modes earlier this month.


Where it would operate: -Both public roads and private

A press release from the Region’s website stated that they picked these two systems because “[t]hey have the potential to encourage a more compact urban form, complement pedestrian-friendly urban design, support street-level development around stations, reduce the growth of traffic congestion and associated air quality concerns and bring many other benefits to our community.” But 2B computer science student Sylvan Mably, who attended the Waterloo meeting, was unsatisfied with the manner in which the Region selected their top two picks. “The Region’s evaluation seems heavily biased in favour of light rail and bus transit,” he told Imprint. “For example, a subway failed the capacity criterion because its



-Both public roads and private laneways

-Bus Rapid Transit

-Light Rail Transit

What it is: Compare to:

-Buses operating at least partly in express lanes

-Hybrid or fully electric vehicles operating on their own rail system


-More frequent stops, Easier to build and integrate into the community, Cheaper to build than LRT, Easier to service

Stands for:


-The Transitway, Ottawa

-Lower rider capacity, Pollution and environmental impact, Not technologically distinct

-TTC streetcar transit, Toronto -Higher rider capacity, More comfortable ride, Cleaner and quieter, More environmentally friendly, Longer vehicle service life -More expensive to build, Harder to integrate into public roadways and driving habits

capacity exceeded the area’s projected ridership. I also thought the evaluation was not sufficiently thorough … I was able to think of a number of important factors that were never mentioned in materials produced by the Region. Even one of the organizers said she thought the results looked suspicious.” Nevertheless, he agreed that rail was a good choice to pursue, saying, “Light rail is quieter, more comfortable and more environmentally friendly.” Construction of the new system is expected to start as early as 2010, with an estimated cost of $306 million. Much of the project’s funding will come from the provincial and federal levels of government in accordance with their own strategies for highdensity regions such as Kitchener, Waterloo, and Cambridge. Meanwhile, student commuters are split on whether bus or rail would be a better solution. “Streetcars are annoying,” commented arts & business student Emmy Cummings, who supports using buses in the new project. “Kitchener-Water-

loo is too small to have a rail system.” First-year arts student Renee Dawson pointed to the safety issues associated with rail, saying, “I think it’s a dangerous thing with all the cars — especially on streets like King Street.” But 2B science student Supriya Gour noted that a rail line might be easier on the cities’ already burdened infrastructure. “They already have the existing lines,” she noted. “The roads are just too small to be any more congested [by buses] ... especially along King Street here, or Hespeler in Cambridge.” There is still much room left for debate on the matter. After presenting their recommendations to the Planning and Works Committee, the Region will then begin evaluating what routes and stops would work best in the cases of both bus and rail. They encourage the public to provide input and to learn more by visiting their web site, http://, or by calling 519-575-4757, ext. 3242.

Margaret Clark

list released in November 2006, and is a precursor to the ICF’s final annual award, Intelligent Community of the Year. By being placed in the Top Seven list, Waterloo stays in the running for this title. All Top Seven winning communities will now undergo “indepth research interviews” between February and May, with a top city to be announced soon after. The ICF, which calls itself a “nonprofit think tank that focuses on job creation and economic development,” is a special interest group working within the World Teleport Association, a trade organization specializing in satellite communications. In selecting their Top Seven Intelligent Communities, the ICF focused on such characteristics as a community’s development of broadband communications for economic advancement. Waterloo’s own nomination, forwarded by a group of Waterloo representatives from the private, public and not-for-profit sectors, emphasizes such city statistics as population, labour force, mean household income, top industries by growth and “emerging sectors or clusters with a potential for growth.” UW president David Johnston is a member of the Intelligent Waterloo Leadership Group, a part of the 23member Intelligent Waterloo committee that spearheaded Waterloo’s 2006 nomination. “There is the spirit of taking talent and ideas from different spheres and putting them together for a common purpose,” said Johnston, on the collaborative efforts rewarded by the city’s place in the Top Seven. “… that common purpose being to grow the community better than any community I know.”

Waterloo makes top seven intelligent communities assistant editor-in-chief

For the second year in a row, the city of Waterloo received recognition from the Intelligent Community Forum (ICF) by being named among the Top Seven Intelligent Communities in the world. This announcement comes as the city of Waterloo is celebrating its 150th anniversary, while the University of Waterloo is celebrating its own half-century marker. “The story we have to tell in Waterloo is unique,” said Waterloo Mayor Brenda Halloran in a press release. “We are a community that has a longstanding history of reinventing itself. Being recognized as one of [the] Top Seven Intelligent Communities is a reflection not only of our prosperous present, but of our focus on continuing to build a promising future, on fostering innovation and technology that builds community.” Waterloo shares this honour with another Canadian city, Ottawa-Gatineau, as well as with five cities from across the world: Dundee, Scotland, United Kingdom; Gangdam District, Seoul, South Korea; Issy-les-Moulineaux, France; Sunderland, Tyne and Wear, United Kingdom; and Tallinn, Estonia. The Top Seven Intelligent Communities were announced at the Pacific Telecommunications Council conference, which ran from January 14 to 17 in Honolulu, Hawaii. The theme of this year’s Top Seven is “leadership,” with the sources of effective leadership being broad in scope — including government employees, elected officials, nonprofit groups, business executives, universities and similar research centres. The announcement of Top Seven winners follows the “Smart21” city



The January 12 Imprint article “Marks now required for co-op jobs” has a factual error. It reads “...employers will have the option of making mark submissions mandatory.” The actual case is that the onus will be on employers to select “grade reports optional” when posting jobs.


FRIDAY, january 19, 2006

Referendum: U-Pass issue to come to a head Continued from page 3

Also, there is concern with how the question is worded on the petition. It reads, “Do you support a Universal Bus Pass at the University of Waterloo, paid for by a fee, not to exceed $50 per term which will be implemented no later than January 1, 2008?” If a referendum were held on this question as-is, it could

weaken the negotiating power of Feds, as it would be bound by its own student body to accept any offer from GRT by that deadline, no matter how disadvantageous that offer proves to be. Feds will meet with the parties interested in the bus pass in the near future, in the hopes of forming a question amicable to everyone. Feds president Michelle Zakrison told

Imprint, “We are going to see how we can move forward from here.” Due to the time constraints, a referendum during the Feds election is highly unlikely. But there is one certainty: one way or another, a bus pass referendum will happen. What remains to be seen is when, and how the question will read.

This week on campus...

Tuesday January 23

UW English Tutors hold an information meeting for students interested in teaching ESL. Other information and applications online at SLC 2143 5:30 p.m. to 6:30 p.m.

Engineers display technological mastery

Wednesday January 24

Dr. Reinhartz , author of Jesus of Hollywood, hosts lecture on roles of Jesus in movies. For info call 519-888-8111 x28259. Siegfried Hall in SJU 7:30 p.m.

Thursday January 25

Sociology Society meet and greet night for soc majors/minors. Also, pub crawl for 19+. Info or RSVP at or PAS 2062 . Bomber 6:30 p.m.

Thursday January 25

“Welcome Back Weekend” kicks off with All Ages Bomber Night (dry). $6 advance tickets at Feds Office / $10 at door. Bomber 9:00 p.m. to 2:00 a.m.

Friday January 26

Nobel Prize Laureate Physics Tony Leggett speaks about quantum mechanics in today’s world. Register by emailing ljhowe@ CEIT 1015 2:00 p.m. to 4:00 p.m.


On January 17, many computer and electrical engineering students showcased their fourth year design projects in the Davis Centre. Here UW fourth year computer engineering student Jason Pang showcases his group’s “USB Breadboard interface.”

Citizenship: UW students reflect on retention law Continued from cover

The many Canadians that were issued citizenship certificates before the beginning of this year are still responsible for applying for retention before their 28th birthday if Section 8 applies to them. They can apply for another certificate with an expiration date, though this still means a separate application process for a certificate of retention to have solid proof of Canadian citizenship. Students at the University of Waterloo expressed various different opinions with regards to this issue. The majority reached a consensus that the law is unnecessary and just makes life more complicated for those citizens who must reapply for retention. They should not have to prove themselves again for the citizenship they have already once been granted. One group of students particularly felt this way about the law because it directly affects them. Arts and business student Willa Lee commented, “What were we considered before the [reapplication]? Were we not Canadians?” Her friend Eunice Bae, a life sciences student defends her opinion, “They’ve already gone through the trouble of obtaining the citizenship once.” One student also said that Section 8 must have some rationale

behind it, otherwise it would not have been instated. When asked whether the retention procedure is a good security measure for Canadians that are perhaps living abroad or have lost touch with Canada, the response was that it does make more sense, especially if someone has been away, for a long period of time such as 10 years. UW’s Institutional Analysis and Planning office gives a breakdown of the students who may be affected by this retention requirement. In September 2006, the University enrolled 24,260 Canadian students and 2,482 international students, including both undergraduates and graduates. The information has not yet been released about how many of the Canadian students are citizens born in Canada, so there is no accurate count of the number of UW students that would need to reapply for citizenship before their 28th birthday. Citizenship and Immigration has been trying to raise awareness of the need to apply for a certificate of retention as of 2003. The public can obtain more information on the issue and find out the procedure for applying for retention at www.



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Tanning Group EXercise Personal Training Transferable Memberships Wide Variety of Equipment


*Offer expires January 31st, 2007. Valid Student ID required. Must be 18 years of age or older. Platinum and Platinum plus clubs excluded.Other restrictions may apply. See club for details.


Friday, january 19, 2007

crossword Across

What is the best thing to do on a snow day? By Dinh Nguyen

“Go dog sledding perhaps?” Candice Rotchford & Helen Szumilas 4B and 3A speech communication

“Watch ‘The Price is Right.’” Sean Lauria & Sarah Grigsby 4B economics & english and 3B economics

1. Coarse tobacco 5. The Mediterranean (2 wds) 9. A dense growth of bushes 14. Purple bubble tea flavour 15. Snakeoil 16. Asian animation 17. Singular of algae 18. Injure 19. 1988 Summer Olympics 20. Idle-people 23. Party to the troubles 24. Source of John D. Rockefeller’s fortune 25. Shotgun-type 34. Compound flower like a geranium 35. Gritty fruit 36. South American wood sorrel 37. Old English jail 38. Great merriment 40. Mad scientist’s assistant 41. Exclamation 42. Digestive juices from liver 43. Sail (French) 44. Study of the physical world (2 wds) 48. Male cat 49. A significant portion of bad newspaper 50. Admit defeat (4 wds) 59. Lots 60. Elaborate solo 61. Arizona Indians 62. Mr. Dress-up’s first name 63. Passage levy 64. Early Barenaked Ladies song 65. Poe’s first name 66. Nocturnal birds 67. Wrap up a corpse


1. Alexander Keith’s animal emblem

“Pour cold water on the sidewalk and watch people fall.” Greg Winston & Mike Mitchell

“Hit up the slopes at Blue

Mountain, then have a big hot chocolate with whipped cream”

4B actuarial science and 5A double degree

Julia Lubczynski

“Never wake up.” Emily Wendland

“Eat cereal and think about women.” Fielding St. Pierre

3B biomedical sciences

1A health sciences

4B science

“Making naked snow angels while being naked. NAKED!” Tony Lin & Emily Kwan

1B biomedical sciences and 4B earth science

“Pee your name in the snow.” Jonah Levine & Lu Jiang 4B arts & business and 1B arts accounting

January 12 Solutions

2. Top-ranked FPS 3. Jason’s ancient ship 4. Urge along 5. Toward land 6. Divine ancient Egyptian beetle 7. Make money 8. Bullets 9. Customer service financial technician 10. Ninja Turtles friend with a little longer name 11. Meson holding a nucleus together 12. Self-congratulatory 13. Fresh-water snake-like fish 21. Satisfy an appetite 22. Jewish holy book 25. Jumping Joe the ball player 26. Warren Buffet’s hometown 27. German sub 28. Sound scale 29. After (French)

30. Soak flax 31. Reasoning 32. French school 33. Foolhardy challenges 38. Home of the Florida Panthers 39. Green around the gills 40. Charged particle 42. Firefox or Explorer 43. Sleeveless jacket 45. More’s paradise 46. Irish surname 47. Perfect form 50. Objective case of thou 51. Lots of cows 52. What the phone did 53. Expanding military alliance 54. Ancient thinking 55. Oil cartel 56. Communion drink 57. Independent Arabian chieftain 58. Load with cargo

Friday, january 19, 2007 Opinion Editor: Anya Lomako Opinion Assistant: Brendan Pinto

Friday, January 19, 2007 — Vol. 29, No. 23

Media loves company

Student Life Centre, Room 1116 University of Waterloo Waterloo, Ontario N2L 3G1 P: 519.888.4048 F: 519.884.7800 Editor-in-chief, Tim Alamenciak Advertising & Production Manager, Laurie Tigert-Dumas General Manager, Catherine Bolger

Editorial Staff Assistant Editor, Margaret Clark Cover Editor, Dinh Nguyen Photo Editor, Michael L. Davenport Assistant Photo Editor, Valerie Broadbent Graphics Editor, Christine Ogley Assistant Graphics Editor, vacant Web Editor, Mohammad Jangda Assistant Web Editor, vacant Systems Administrator, Gautam Khanna Sys. Admin. Assistant, Peter Gibbs Lead Proofreader, Emma Tarswell Proofreaders Kaitlin Ojamae, Shivaun Hood, Linda Kong Ting, Adrienne Raw

It’s lonely out there on the news stands. Aside from a couple blogs that occasionally cover campus content and the official spigots of information, Imprint is your only source for news. died with the graduation of its founder, Chris Tan., a former colossus, has about as much life as a pop-chips-and-parents party. Give us competition! Multiple news outlets add an excellent feeling of choice for the student body. You can see different angles to stories and compare facts between the two sources. Jonathan Fishbein, a masters student in the department of systems design engineering, is brewing up a pundit podcast to rock the Feds elections and give a much-needed alternative voice to UW.

Already one episode in, Fishbein described his motivation for doing the O’Fishbein Factor: “Feds elections are funny. The campaigns aren’t as well thought out as they should be.” Fishbein has several years of Feds experience and is currently involved with Feds council. “I have to watch where I step,” he said. “But I do want to step a lot.” This kind of enterprising attitude is something that comes only in fits and waves around UW. Fishbein’s approach is simple, funny punditry. Anybody can gather all their wit and intellect in a basket and throw it up on a website; but few do. I could go on and talk about the fragmentation of the student body through co-op terms and satellite campuses, but it all comes down to having the balls to put yourself out there. In the past, I’ve spent pounds of ink preaching about the wonders of writing for Imprint. And while it is certainly a wonderful endeavour, I would encourage everyone to just get out there and create. Someone once said to me that the best quality in a writer is the ability to say something in conversation that makes everyone pause — something fresh, new and wonderful.

Writing ain’t about using proper words or sentence structure and avoiding run-ons and crappy grammar. It’s about having something to say that people care about and haven’t heard a dozen times over. Fishbein’s first episode certainly accomplished this. He riffed on Darcy Higgins’ Facebook following — a group pushing him to run for vice-president internal. Following this, Fishbein interviewed former vice-president internal Lawrence Lam. Oh Lawrence, how I miss you. A funny approach to the Feds elections will do a lot to balance out coverage. Having an alternative outlet will provide you with better information. Fishbein has taken a big step; and I would be overjoyed if others followed in his footprints. And as for the arm wrestling scenario proposed at the end of Fishbein’s first episode, Kreese from The Karate Kid put it best: “We do not train to be merciful here. Mercy is for the weak. Here, in the streets, in competition. A man confronts you, he is the enemy. An enemy deserves no mercy.”

Graham Moogk-Soulis


Production Staff Chris Miller, Kinga Jakab, Nasim Motayar, Kirill Levin, Karina Graf, Michael L. Davenport, Jacqueline McKoy, Jeff Anstett Office Staff Distribution, Andrea Meyers Distribution, Amy Pfaff Board of Directors President, Jeff Anstett Vice-president, Adam Gardiner Treasurer, Jacqueline McKoy Secretary, Stephen Eaton Staff liaison, Darren Hutz Imprint is the official student newspaper of the University of Waterloo. It is an editorially independent newspaper published by Imprint Publications, Waterloo, a corporation without share capital. Imprint is a member of the Ontario Community Newspaper Association (OCNA). Editorial submissions may be considered for publication in any edition of Imprint. Imprint may also reproduce the material commercially in any format or medium as part of the newspaper database, Web site or any other product derived from the newspaper. Those submitting editorial content, including articles, letters, photos and graphics, will grant Imprint first publication rights of their submitted material, and as such, agree not to submit the same work to any other publication or group until such time as the material has been distributed in an issue of Imprint, or Imprint declares their intent not to publish the material. The full text of this agreement is available upon request. Imprint does not guarantee to publish articles, photographs, letters or advertising. Material may not be published, at the discretion of Imprint, if that material is deemed to be libelous or in contravention with Imprint’s policies with reference to our code of ethics and journalistic standards. Imprint is published every Friday during fall and winter terms, and every second Friday during the spring term. Imprint reserves the right to screen, edit and refuse advertising. One copy per customer. Imprint ISSN 0706-7380. Imprint CDN Pub Mail Product Sales Agreement no. 40065122. Next board meeting: TBA

The wrong way to say I’m From Rolling Stone

What could be cooler than landing a summer internship at Rolling Stone? Well, landing a summer internship at Vogue, but other than that, I really have a hard time thinking of anything. So then, if this seems like a primo gig, why does the new MTV reality show I’m From Rolling Stone rub me the wrong way? All the ingredients are there for me to love it: journalism, music, a look inside landing a much sought after job, a cute boy, etc. — think Almost Famous as a reality show with twenty-something journalism students. But something still seems so wrong about the concept of another Apprentice-like spin-off that will, inevitably, reward potential journalists on their ability to be great TV personalities as opposed to writers. Although the show was originally supposed to take more of an Apprentice form, the six cast members are actual interns who are fighting over stories, bylines and, most importantly, a position as a contributing editor at Rolling Stone at the end of the summer. The formulaic casting is a clear indication that the show is much more focused on creating

the next “big thing” rather than actually finding a great up-and-coming rock journalist. There’s the blonde “pretty girl,” whom the Rolling Stone website describes as “fashion-conscious and she loves rock & roll.” But there’s also the indie-music guy with stubble, and the really great writer who can’t control his temper enough to succeed and the, as the MTV website describes, the “gender-bending lesbian.” I can see the conflict brewing already. The show, which graced Canadian televisions January 11, isn’t as bad in theory as it seems in practice. The producers have specifically chosen a cast to create drama, and while the cast all have impressive resumés it just seems too contrived. If the show appeared to be an honest attempt at finding the best “undiscovered” journalist in the world, I’d love it, but when it features your typical reality show cast, it’s hard to take it seriously. While being a good journalist does mean pushing for the interview, meeting deadlines, chasing down the story, competing for leads — and many of the other tasks contestants perform in the five minute preview on YouTube, it’s also a lot easier to get Snoop Dogg on the phone when MTV films you the whole time. Garnering interest in the show shouldn’t prove difficult, as “rock journalism” has always been a glorified job ­­­­— living side-by-side with rock stars, but without getting up on stage every night to do so. This show, however, further glorifies a career that takes years of hard work and determination and makes it seem like it’s

all jet-setting around the world to interview Morrissey. Yet, as someone who has done the grunt work and interviewed the big names — the likes of Bill Graham and Romeo Dallaire — it’s hard even to watch the trailer for this so-called “reality” show. Promoting interest in responsible journalism in an age where the mainstream media can be less than trustworthy — just take a look at the number of books about the failure of the media since the election of the Bush administration — it would have been nice to see a show that portrays responsible journalism. Instead, we get the hot chick in all the press photos and the “dumb jock” admitting he wrote his first piece when he was drunk — not exactly Pulitzer material. In an age where everyone from our CEOs to our top chefs to our journalists are chosen on TV it’s hard to imagine what the interview process may one day become. Am I going to have to eat a cockroach to get an internship at Random House? Or get from here to Amsterdam and back before my competitors to write for The Globe and Mail? I sincerely hope not. While it might be mind-blowingly amazing to utter the phrase “I’m Ashley, and I’m calling from Rolling Stone” and have it not just be to my collection of stuffed animals, I would still prefer to earn it the hard way ­­— and not because I happen to have a nice rack or a heated temper.



FRIDAY, january 19, 2007

U-Pass: practical, easy to use, convenient

In the controversial debate over the U-Pass, it seems students are unaware of the benefits this proposal has for both students and the greater community. In the school of planning, it is ingrained in us that cars can be the bane of our society, indirectly resulting in unsustainable sprawling development, congestion, declining air quality, complex social issues and irreversible damage to the natural environment. We learn that by getting out of our cars, we can improve our own health and the vitality of the community by reducing automobile congestion and improving air quality by reducing emissions. Reflecting these tenets, the Region of Waterloo has set a goal of reducing the share of auto travel from 84 per cent in 1999 to 77 per cent in

2016. As evidence of the Region’s commitment to the plan, they have adopted numerous service improvements for Grand River Transit (GRT) and allocated funds to improving facilities. The Region’s true challenge is convincing citizens of the community to embrace alternate modes of transportation, like cycling, walking and transit. The U-Pass program is a mechanism for UW students to stand up and make a change in support of the Region’s vision. In the Jan. 12 Imprint article, I read about students who object to the U-Pass on the grounds that it is unfair to take money from students’ pockets that is better spent on education. The fee under consideration ($41.67/term) is actually so low, that it pays for itself in just nine round trips. That’s less than one trip per week. It’s actually more cost-effective than driving all term. Look at what you’d save if you didn’t have to buy a parking pass and could instead commute by transit. The parking fees are $114/term. That’s more than $70 in your pocket each term. If you took that car off the road altogether, you’d save all the

gas, maintenance and insurance fees, an average annual savings of $9,000 according to CAA (and that’s a conservative estimate). So when it comes to penny pinching to save money for education, transit strikes me as the reasonable, rational choice. Some say it’s unfair as a matter of convenience. They say UW should not impose a non-refundable fee on all students because there are people who have never taken a GRT bus and never will. Never say never. Our neighbours, Wilfrid Laurier, have implemented a similar program and found tremendous success in the first year. Laurier students who never knew what GRT had to offer are now regularly using the service. In the first month 60,000 riders from Laurier boarded GRT, and a year later ridership rose another 10,000 to 70,000 riders. What does the system have to offer students? The GRT network is made up of a multitude of routes, linking just about any off-campus site you could ever need or want to visit. In some cases it’s faster and more convenient to board a bus than to drive. For example, the iXpress will

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I’d like to reply to this hippie-bashing so-called journalist Brendan Pinto. First off, I’d like to clearly mention that not all environmentalists are hippies. I am a geography student and yes, I care about the environment, but I am no hippie. Your generalization of all environmentalists being hippies continues to generate the typical stereotype. The comments about environmentalists growing pot and eating babies were very offensive. Next, global warming is no myth. How do you explain the constant increase in worldwide warming and icebergs melting at an increasingly fast pace? None of your statements in this article, “Back off Big Environment” are based on any scientific evidence. If they were, you would see that we are harming the environment. And your statement “CO2 is a natural

get you to Fairview from campus in 30 minutes flat: I challenge you to beat that in your car, especially during rush hour. In the winter, transit can also be an appealing option. I know I’d rather hop on one of the many GRT buses that circle our campus to get from A to B rather than walking. The GRT network is integrated so well that you could even board the bus with your bike if you found yourself stuck in an unpredicted rain or snowfall. Some late route schedules make transit an attractive alternative to travel to and from the bars without having to arrange for a designated driver or hail a cab (more money in your pocket). Simply stated: it’s practical, easy to use and convenient. Students from the environmental studies faculty have adamantly been seeking signatures for a petition to have this item brought to referendum for a vote. This is not an issue for Student’s Council to decide, it’s an issue for all students. I urge you to sign the petition and do your part to realize our vision for a healthier community. ­— Heather Holbrook 4A planning

part of the Earth’s ecology” is correct. But at the rate that humans are cutting down trees and existing plant life in order to create buildings in their place, where do you think all this CO2 is going? Also, your “devil’s advocate position” is not quite thought out. I love the fact that you mention only shoveling your driveway once this winter and that you can go out and get your January tan. How will you feel in the summer when you can’t go out of your house or else your skin will burn instantly because you didn’t feel like taking the bus or supporting the environment? And you mention that the warmer it gets, the less fuel we’ll need to heat our home in the winter. Do you seriously think we’ll save money and energy? Why do you think we had the 2003 blackout due to overuse of energy? We use extensive amounts of energy trying to cool our homes in the summer. So maybe next time you want to write something about the environment, use real arguments instead of your own judgments. If you had at least taken one of the many existing courses in geography offered at the University of Waterloo, you would understand the real threat of global

Next issue’s topics:

How do you feel about incorporating allage events into the on-campus bar? What minority groups do you think are neglected in the university club list? Imprint wants to know your stand on these issues. Submit an editorial of approximately 500 words to

warming, instead of assuming it is a myth because you don’t want to have to deal with it. ­— Katie Low Geography

Zakrison wrong on U-Pass

To the editor, Students who own cars already subsidize the transit system through taxes. We also pay for parking, insurance, maintenance and extra gas to shuttle our car-less friends around. Others who pay more to live close to campus have no interest in a bus pass. That Feds President Michelle Zakrison now believes we wish to pay for everyone else’s bus pass is beyond ridiculous. A slight majority of the campus might also support a fee to subsidize calculators, rice, the Psychology 101 textbook or tampons. Simple majority votes on fees of this nature are tyranny for the budgets of the average student. As a pro-choice activist for wallets, I call upon the Feds executive to reduce the number of fees students have to pay each term for useless, stupid and pointless services. ­— Tom Levesque 4B computer engineering

F eatures How to avoid getting stuck in bad housing Friday, january 19, 2007


11 Features Editor: Ellen Ewart Features Assistant: Christina Ironstone


Chloe Huan

Sean C. Kinsella reporter

There are few defining moments in the university experience that truly represent the inevitable transition to adulthood. There is the first all-nighter;the first exam; the first time you attend class in sweats because you woke up only twenty minutes before. And there is the signing of your first lease. The crisp white paper with the large areas of illegible black print at the bottom. The knowledge that you owe your landlord thousands of dollars in exchange for living in a, most likely, subpar student house. Looking around, you should feel alarmed that you are paying $400 a month for this subterranean cave with peeling wallpaper, but instead you feel good. Really good. There is a glow about you. You have joined the real world. From now on you will have to pay every month for the rest of your natural life. Congratulations. However, before you sign away your financial future, there are a few things that you will need to consider. Here are the nine commandments of off-campus housing to ensure that your year ahead is the best it can be. Know what you want The first thing you will need to decide is whether or not you want to leave residence. After

living there for eight months, it may seem like a simple choice, but you need to be honest with yourself about whether or not you are ready to take on the responsibilities that are required of a tenant. If you are not sure, now is the time to start asking around for more information. This might also be a great time to take a moment and write down the types of things that you are looking for in potential housing. This list will both clarify what you are looking for and more importantly help you figure out what you don’t want. In addition, Housing will be hosting several info sessions in early January to prepare students who are considering off-campus housing. For more information and session times please see www.studentlife.uwaterloo. ca/news.php. Research A large part of living off-campus is learning to be independent. No one is going to clean up after you or make you eat your vegetables. The same goes for finding a house. There are many resources in and around campus to help you find housing. For example, the board with all the bright orange slips in the Great Hall of the SLC. Additionally, the Off-Campus office does have listings on their website http://peanut. to help you find properties. It may also be worth checking out the classifieds in The Kitchener-Waterloo Record. The listings there include non-traditional student housing, which may or may not be something you want to look into. The Off-Campus Housing Department has a list of sites with rental properties at html. There are several other sites worth visiting, especially and www.

Know your rights Part of your responsibility as a tenant is to understand your rights, knowing what the roles of the landlord and tenant are in legal terms. Did you know, for example, that it is illegal for a landlord to ask for more than one month’s rent as a security deposit? Or that you should make sure to keep your receipts because you are owed interest on the last month’s payment every 12 months if you pay it up front? Or that no landlord can have a no pets policy and if it is written into the lease it is null and void? These are the kinds of things that you will need to know as a tenant or you could be unfairly taken advantage of. These and many more tips are available at www.offcampushousing., a great resource to check out if you know little or nothing about housing. In addition, you can also go to the Off-Campus Housing Office located on the second floor of Village 1 and talk to someone in person if you are at all unsure about the nitty gritty of the Landlord Tenants Act, or things that do not seem right to you in a potential lease. Also check out for more information on your rights. The Ontario Rental Housing Tribunal handles the moderation of disputes between landlords and tenants and has more info as well at House hunt Once you have located what sounds like a decent property, you will need to go and have a look. There is a good chance that you are going to have to look at a whole bunch of really dirty, crappy places before you find the one that is right for you. Keep in mind things such as location, proximity to amenities (a fancy way of saying groceries, liquor stores and anything else you might need) and access to public transportation. When actually at the property, it is important to have a good look at everything around you. Is the plumbing held together with duct tape? Does

the roof look secure? What’s the laundry situation, are you going to have to wash your clothing in the sink? Think of the most infinitesimal details and double-check them. You will be glad you did. Be Picky It should go without saying that you won’t likely choose the first house you see. There is, despite rumors to the contrary, plenty of housing around. Don’t get rushed in to choosing a subpar house because you feel like you need to. New listings and properties pop up every day. Take your time and hold out for the place that meets your needs Choose your roommates carefully One of the most important considerations for your future housing is whom you will share it with. Unless you were holed up in Village 1, you no doubt have some experience already in dealing with roommates. Remember that once you sign that paper, you are more or less locked in for at least a term (unless you happen to have a month to month arrangement). For this reason, it may not necessarily be the best idea to live with your friends. Friendships that were created in the hallowed halls of residence have a way of splitting apart when confronted with real issues such as cleaning, noise, and possible involvement of the police. If you are determined that nothing can tear you apart then by all means bunker down with your BFFs in housing matrimony. I would suggest, however, that you do draw up a list of expectations for each other and perhaps make a cleaning schedule to make things easier on all of you. This way you do not have someone who is majoring in keg stands shacking up with a pre-optometry student who actually needs to study. See HOUSING, page 15

Cumming up a little short The physics of history, and the history of physics

In my last column, I made the claim that most any two subjects can be linked in such a way as to make the study of one useful to a student of the other. This week, to prove my point, let’s start with an easy pair: physics and — yes, you guessed it — history. History’s great: people are born, people die and somewhere in the middle of that mess, they participate, either passively or actively, in tremendous upheavals. And as any history student will tell you, none of these upheavals really happen in isolation: technological advances have a tendency to prompt social changes, while economics play into political actions and vice versa. Physics is no stranger to this cycle. While Newton was himself a devout Christian, when Newtonian physics burst onto the scene back in the seventeenth century, it gave rise to a way of observing and understanding the world that stood outside of religious theory. In other words, he gave us a culminating point in the formation of science as a subject. The result, from a historical perspective, can be seen in the pursuant Age of Reason

— a period which took the success of physics as evidence that the whole of human knowledge could also be quantified in systemic and objective terms. Similarly, the development of Einstein’s theory of relativity during the Modern era is strikingly well-timed; the realization that time was itself no longer constant can easily be compared to the general shift away from Victorian ideas about absolute truth. Now fast-forward to history itself and its relevance to physics students. Ever heard of Ubiquity: The Science of History, by Mark Buchanan? Essentially, the book summarizes the research of three physicists who investigated the instability of complex systems and compares this “non-equilibrium physics” to historical events — wars, natural phenomena, economics and so forth — and so proposes that history itself can be scientifically predicted. As an advanced physics student, you may well take issue with some of what Buchanan says — and as a non-Calvinist you might chafe immediately at the possibility that any large-scale human event can be determined in advance — but this field of questioning is more common than you might think. Ever heard of the Global Consciousness Project? It’s a Princeton University affair that also goes by the name “EGG,” and reads the output of random number generators across the world every second of the day. See PHYSICISTS, page 14

Every once in a while I get some really interesting questions from my readers. Here are a couple that I have received recently: This first question was from a reader who had had a very busy evening. Just to lay it out for you, first he masturbated in the shower and shortly after met up with a female partner who began to pleasure him orally in preparation for sex. However, after two failed attempts at putting on a condom — he couldn’t maintain an erection with a rubber — they gave up and had sex without a condom. “We had sex for a good 45 minutes or so due to my not being able to produce any cum. I did not cum at any point with her.” He wondered what the chances were that there was still semen inside his penis, which could cause her to become pregnant. Unfortunately, I wasn’t quite given enough information to really calculate the exact percentage chance that this gentleman had enough semen left in his penis to get his partner pregnant. However, I can say that yes, there is a chance that his partner could get pregnant from what he described. When he masturbated to orgasm in the shower he would have ejaculated the majority of his sperm, but not 100 per cent of it — some would still have been caught up in his urethra or further back in his plumbing. Usually this

isn’t a big deal as the sperm would have come out on their own eventually or would have been re-absorbed into the body over time. But in this case, he ended up having sex pretty soon after ejaculating. It’s entirely possible that some of the left-over sperm ended up in his partner’s mouth when she was giving him head, but there is still a chance that some was left to make it into her vagina with his pre-cum when they started having sex. So it’s a small chance, but still a chance. This couple’s first mistake was giving up on using a condom; condoms are 98 per cent effective at preventing pregnancy and around 70-85 per cent effective at preventing sexually transmitted infections, when used correctly. This couple’s second mistake was not having a secondary form of birth control as a back-up for when they couldn’t get a condom on and/or in case the condom had broken. A good back-up would be something like her being on the pill, wearing an IUD, using a diaphragm or using a female condom. At the very least they could have liberally applied some spermicidal gel or foam, this is less effective than condoms and can cause irritation, but is more effective than nothing. However, none of these methods, except the female condom, would have protected them from STI’s. Another thing: it’s not uncommon for some guys to have trouble staying hard when they try to get a condom on, but it just takes practise and/or a little extra effort to get rid of this problem. See TRUTH, page 13



FRIDAY, january 19, 2007

Checkerboard the home of fab food The family restaurant concept is attempted more times than the Rubiks Cube and unfortunately fails even more frequently. Often times, such places start out with the intent of producing “home cooked” meals with friendly familial service, but grow too big and forget their roots. The Checkerboard Restaurant, hidden away at 705 Belmont Avenue West (across from the well known European food mart Vincenzo’s), is quite the opposite. I raise five out of five beers to this masterpiece of an eatery and encourage anyone with access to experience it too. The restaurant itself is located in the too-adorable-for-its-own-good “Belmont Village.” It neighbours several specialty boutiques, including a quaint florist shop and a unique loose tea shop. The signage on the outside of the building seems to suggest a bland experience, but do not be fooled, as more resources and efforts have been invested on the interior. The dining room only houses approximately 20 tables but every inch of space is used to the maximum efficiency. A long

line-up at the door reflects the quality brim with cheese and ham. The panof the establishment and has never cakes taste fluffy, buttery and surpass been a problem in the past. The homey the IHOP by leaps and bounds. The decor is minimal, clean, stylish and home-fries (a factor which can make or break a breakfast) are actually appropriate. fried, unlike many competitors who The most overwhelming part of the Checkerboard experience is de- knowingly produce a shoddy filler by ciding what to eat. As everything on deep-frying, baking, or nuking (gasp!) the menu is invitingly described, it precut or frozen potatoes. As the exquisite service is by far becomes apparent that anyone can be its greatest feafilled for less than it deserves ten dollars. As our Upon entering the ture, the most praise. talented waitress said, “don’t de- dining room, you are Upon entering the cide, you can have dining room, you it all!” I don’t, how- greeted with a smile are greeted with a ever, recommend smile from every from every single “it all” as even one single staff memserving on its own ber. The survival staff member. is difficult to finish of such a business completely. is absolutely deThe breakfast menu rivals such pendent upon return patronage and this breakfast giants as Benny’s or Mel’s, goal has successfully been achieved. the Greek-inspired lunch and supper On my first visit, I asked the efentrées boast value for dollar and fervescent waitress for poached eggs. quality for palate. Any of the Souvlaki As it was long past anyone’s normal dishes, as far as I can tell (I am not breakfast time, she advised me that the authority, by far), taste authenti- “Daddy doesn’t poach this late.” I cally Greek. When I asked my friend, am positive that if I had looked at after a long contemplative pause, he all disappointed, the chef, whose concluded that nothing should be nickname is “Daddy,” probably changed as the dish was perfect in would have poached an egg, but the every way. adorableness of the situation and the Checkerboard is close to my home, vastness of the menu persuaded me so for me, many a breakfast has been to keep looking. To dine at The Checkerboard spent admiring the chef ’s twenty-some egg creations. The “Bosse’s Favourite” expands your palate and makes you ham and cheese omelet is filled to the part of its richly cultured family. By

Myke Sokolyk

Friendly family dining where everyone knows your name. two visits, my friends and I were already in personal conversation with our wait staff and already knew, by face, the eclectic group of regulars. For any student far from home, going through a crisis that requires a mother’s cuisine or just wanting to feel like they are at home, The Checkerboard is ideal.

The Checkerboard will continue to be the neighbourhood’s choice, but even if I lived farther, I would make the drive. It is just a short bus ride away from campus. Make the effort, you can thank me in person — I’ll be there: third booth on the left.

From ginger spice to baby carrots My sympathies go out to January. It is the month many people use to restrain or restrict themselves from certain foods in order to compensate for the holiday feasting that was delivered by December. Rather than holding back, why not bask in the healthy seasonal produce this frosty month has to offer, including turnips, carrots, pears, squash, cabbage, scallops and lobster. My focus will be on carrots, whose elongated triangle silhouette and orange hue make it a beauty only Mother Nature could create. On a personal level, carrots and I have made peace with one another — but this wasn’t always the case. My history with carrots stretches back to my “Chicken McNuggets-onlymom-and-NO-carrots!” days. Carrots were eaten raw during dinnertime in my household, and it usually became a trip to the outskirts of my tastebuds: “bitter-ville,” where I would battle it out with these grisly vegetables. More often than not they became “the enemy” standing in the way of me and “dessert.” As I grew up, I became fond of this vegetable, for

its hearty crunch in my salads and its tenderness in stews. Believed to have originated in central Asia, this hearty vegetable was used for medicinal purposes and came in a variety of colours from canary yellow to lilac purple. The carrot is a member of the parsley family whose relatives include fennel, celery and parsnip. Carrots contain a large amount of vitamin A, carotene and potassium. The myth surrounding carrots and improving eyesight holds some truth to it; carotene in carrots converts to vitamin A when eaten, which aids in the well-being of the eyes. When choosing carrots, look for richly coloured bodies with fresh green tops. If you are in a rush, consider picking small carrots or baby carrots — they are usually more tender and require less cooking time. For this carrot recipe, ginger is the main ingredient. It carries peppery notes with a slightly sweet taste. This side dish can be prepared in a blink of an eye and is versatile enough to be paired with what you desire during your mealtimes. I have had these carrots alongside honey barbequed chicken and corn bread pudding. Yum, my rendition of perfect comfort food, which I happily encourage you to emulate! Don’t hesitate to email me if you would like recipes for either of these dishes.

Ginger Carrots 12 baby carrots, blanched, tops left on 2 tablespoons finely chopped ginger 1 tablespoon brown sugar 1 tablespoon butter


1. Heat butter, ginger and sugar in skillet. 2. Add carrots and toss in ginger sauce. 3. Serve warm. N.B. Blanching means briefly putting food into boiling water, then into cold water immediately to stop the cooking process. Blanching the carrots helps preserve the vibrant orange colour and enhance the flavour. Graphic by Christine Ogley


FRIDAY, january 19, 2007


Truth: avoid false rumours Continued from page 11

Try putting a condom on by yourself; make sure that you use the proper sized condom. Then try using a condom when you’re masturbating. Jerking off while you wear it will help you get used to wearing a condom and, who knows, maybe you’ll really like the experience. Try, in the heat of the moment, having your partner put the condom on you with her mouth, that way you don’t really have to stop the fun to put it on. This next question is from a woman who used to masturbate when she was younger but stopped and now wants to start up again. “I would love to reach climax; I just really don’t want to break my hymen, how do I achieve this?” Firstly, there are some things everyone should know about hymens. If you’re worrying about preserving your hymen to prove your virginity, don’t bother: you might not even have one, it might have been “broken” already from non-sexual activities, or it might not even “break” when you do have sex for the first time. A hymen isn’t how someone is going to be able to tell that you are a virgin.

There’s no “best way” or “most appropriate way” when it comes to masturbation Hymens are a bit of a medical mystery; not all women are born with a hymen, and between the time that a girl is old enough for school and until she reaches puberty, her hymen will be quite thin and delicate. This is because she is not producing as much estrogen. At this time it is thought to be possible for the hymen to be broken by something as simple as horseback riding, gymnastics or strenuous exercise. After puberty the hymen, if present, thickens and changes shape. Instead of covering the whole entrance, it now forms a little crescent near the bottom that is pretty much indistinguishable from the other folds in a vagina. A woman’s hymen is pretty out of the way; this is why a normal hymen isn’t damaged by using tampons — in fact, for many women, even having sex doesn’t disturb their hymen at all! Since this reader is well past puberty, her hymen (if she has one) should be thick and able to handle masturbation just fine — so long as she isn’t planning on shoving gigantic dildos or big zucchinis inside herself. As for actually how to bring oneself to climax, well that’s a little more complicated and something that one has to explore on their own. Every woman is built differently and is going to respond to different types of stimulation. For many, the most sure-fire way to climax involves clitoral, not vaginal, stimulation. There are many ways to play with a clit: rub it through the hood covering it, lick your fingers or use vaginal juices to lubricate your finger while you rub it or lay on your stomach and press your palm or the heel of your hand against your clit. You could even try rubbing it on things. There’s no “best way” or “most appropriate way” when it comes to masturbation, there is only the way that works best for you.

Shawn Bell staff reporter

Hal Jacques has a BA in economics. He plays bass in a metal band and in his spare time records albums, including his own, to be released on Year of the Sun in the spring. But when asked to define his job, Jacques says that, first and foremost, he is a guitar teacher. That’s for Pro Music, a music school in Waterloo that houses music classes for all ages — from little children playing tambourines to recorded artists honing their skills. The building is designed to look like a studio; Jacques has his own little room; “Standing, I could touch all four walls,” he said. The lessons are one on one, student and teacher face to face, both with guitars, for half an hour a week. “The students are mainly beginners,” Jacques said, “who have never picked up a guitar. I have to introduce them to it. One of the big challenges of the job is not necessarily trying to teach people to play guitar, but trying to make them stick with it past the beginner stage. It can be frustrating for a student at first, so I’m not only a guitar teacher, but I’m also a guitar motivator.” And how does one learn the guitar? “The first thing I do is give them finger exercises,” he said, “things to get their hands used to playing on a fretboard. It’s a different motion than things you do in everyday life. It’s something you have to get used to, and hone your muscle memory to be able to move your fingers the way they have to move.” “From there I move to basic chords. I’ll teach them a little bit of single-note picking, a basic scale and show them a simple melody that uses the scale. Then it depends on where the student wants to go. Students who want to learn as many songs as they can, I’ll focus on chords. Kids who want to be playing blazing solos eventually, I’ll have a bigger focus on scales and stuff like that.”


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Hal Jacques carefully studies his pupil’s finger placement while providing instruction. The students range in age from nine years to adults. “One thing my boss said to me,” Jacques said, “when I started was, ‘A lot of these kids are going to look up to you, and think you’re a pretty cool guy for teaching them how to play.’” “I feel I have a responsibility to the students, not to waste their time and just show them songs, while at the same time motivating them to play the guitar and make it fun for them.” “This is something that you can do for the rest of your life. It’s an endless path. There is no final, ‘Well, I’ve learned the guitar.’ You can never say that. And anybody can learn. Things may take longer for some people, but anybody can learn guitar.”

Jacques, who graduated from UW one year ago, started his education in the faculty of science. “I did physics for one year,” he said, “and I thought ‘Fuck this shit, I’m not a scientist!’ So I switched to arts, and in my first year of that I took ten different arts courses.” Economics was an easy way to relate math to an arts major. So he switched to economics. He graduated with an honours BA in economics. “I also took extra courses, business management courses, marketing courses, entrepreneurship and things like that and got an arts and business complement to my degree.” “I knew I didn’t want a job in economics, but it appealed to me because I thought I could use the business

knowledge and combine it with the recording I do and the music I play. Looking back, if I was going to try and use any of that knowledge I would have to relearn it all anyways. My university education alone is not enough to get me going in any sort of music business.” “Recording is what I want to do. When I started in arts and business, the idea was that I was going to start my own record label. I don’t know if that’s necessarily what I want to do anymore. There’s so many facets of the music industry that I’m not going to rule anything out. I’ll see as we go what I’m best at, what I’m interested in.”

FRIDAY, january 19, 2007


FRIDAY, january 19, 2007 Neal Moogk-Soulis staff reporter

Banner by Angelo Florendo

Welcome to the start of a photography retrospective of UW. As you may have seen and heard, UW is marking the 50th Anniversary of the first class at Waterloo this year. At Imprint, we will be running archival photos that show various buildings on campus, though not necessarily as they exist today. Your job is to identify the building and let us know by the following Tuesday along with any comments or memories you may have about the building. We will print responses with a brief history of the building and a new building to identify the following week. We’ve begun the series by doing the research for you. Here, we feature the Dana Porter Library, the most visible building on campus.

Dana Porter Library Who: Named for Dana Porter, Chief Justice of Ontario and UW’s first chancellor What: First campus building built with a library in mind When: Opened in 1965 with seven storeys Where: Almost the highest point on campus Why: Why not?

UW Graphics, Maurice Green, 19690323

UW Graphics, Maurice Green, 19691236

The Dana Porter Library is perhaps University of Waterloo’s most prominent building. Drivers travelling west on University Avenue see the signature sugar cube rising from the horizon before they see any other buildings on campus. The library’s prominence is partly geographic and partly characteristic. The building sits on one of the highest points on campus (the Grad House is slightly higher). At 10 storeys, it is the tallest academic building on the campus. When it was built in 1965, it sat more or less in the centre of the existing buildings, partway between the science and engineering buildings and the arts buildings. It was a flagship building and some coveted their view of it, so much so that when the Engineering Lecture Hall (now the J.R. Coutts Engineering Lecture Hall) was built in 1967, the building was partly buried to allow for unobstructed views from the other engineering buildings. Before the Dana Porter Library opened, the library was in Engineering 1 (now DWE) along with an early campus cafeteria. When the library opened in 1965, it also housed the administrative office and played host to early co-op interviews. Keeping pace with the rapid growth of the university, the library was under renovation less than five years after it opened. Construction added three more storeys on top of the existing seven, giving the building its characteristic sugar cube look. This renovation may have given rise to the campus myth that the library is sinking. While there is a moat around the building, with the first floor below grade, the building is not sinking because of either the architects omitting to include the weight of the books nor the weight of three additional stories. In 1976, the Dana Porter Library became a full depository library and began receiving copies of all federal government publications. In 1994, it was announced that underused

Physicists: Newton and Einstein historically on cue Continued from page 11

Once gathered, EGG data is measured against human and environmental events all throughout the world, with notable correlations between real world activities and spikes in the numbers prompting the creation of new theoretical models. The objectivity of such a project must necessarily be questioned (and to that end, I recommend visiting http://noosphere. to decide for yourself), but the fact remains that facets of the science are most definitely being explored in a historical context. Thus, just as physics has had a profound effect in shaping human history, so too has history itself begun to shape the direction of contemporary physics. But wait — one final example remains! And for this most lofty of inter-subject quandaries, I turn to the philosophical battlefield that is Terminator 2. For those of you who’ve been hiding under a very large, heavy rock for the last twenty

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For this most lofty of inter-subject quandaries, I turn to the philosophical battlefield that is Terminator 2. The technological developer, so devastated by this news, helps the main characters seek out and destroy all record of his doomsday research. Pretty heavy stuff, right? But when you consider how many real-world deaths have

been caused by scientists “not knowing” their inventions would wreak such devastation, maybe not so fantastical after all. Certainly, we can’t have first-year physics students claiming they failed to learn basic kinematics equations on “moral grounds.” But scientists nonetheless have a human imperative to consider the consequences of what they’re developing — especially in a historical context that has seen the deadly effects of the hydrogen bomb, anthrax and even the semi-automatic assault rifle. So while making Medieval Studies mandatory for physics students seems far-fetched, maybe it’s not so extreme to suggest that aspiring scientists get a basic history lesson about the dangers of misusing human knowledge. Failing that, we should all at the very least ask ourselves the following: If you knew that completing your research would sentence three billion people to death, what would you do?

Housing: tips to help students search for the perfect dwelling Continued from page 11

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years, the important plot is this: a cybernetic being from the future tells a cybernetics researcher in the past that the technology he’s going to develop will lead to the deaths of three billion people.

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Know your landlord Getting a sense of your landlord is an important part of living away from residence. You’ll be giving a lot of money to this person, so knowing a little bit about your landlord might be the difference between having something fixed and having to deal with a washer gone amok. Just as the landlord will decide if you should live in their space, you should be deciding if you would like to live there too. You should be aware of where the landlord lives in relation to you. In some cases they may live directly above or below you; they may live in the same town, or even be absentee.

This information should indicate how helpful or involved the landlord is likely to be. While having the landlord live three hours away may seem ideal, it may not seem ideal when your furnace breaks in the middle of winter and you need to get in touch. Also be wary of someone trying to coerce you into signing right away. They will probably tell you that there are several people looking at the house in addition to you. This may or may not be true. Stick to your guns and don’t pressured. Bring in the experts While bringing in the parents may seem like a backwards step towards your independence, for first-time renters it is likely a necessity.

Parents may be required to co-sign the lease. Not only can your parents (or someone who is experienced in housing) provide a neutral perspective, but it never hurts to have another set of eyes checking out the property for things you might not have thought of. Have fun This is a very exciting moment in your life, so make sure you enjoy it. While it is easy to get caught up into the semantics of having to find housing, this does represent an important moment in your life. Things become a lot more complicated when you move in with someone you care for. Like many of these pivotal moments that so often go unnoticed, the key is to enjoy the simplicity of this moment while it lasts.

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volumes would be stored off campus in what is now known as the Annex. In the winter, the most prominent feature of the library is the 10 metre Christmas tree that sits atop the library. The tree first appeared in 1998 and was made up of an old TV tower, the large bulb from an old light standard and strings of lights. At night, it can be seen from many points in the city and even out into the countryside.

15 Finally, the Dana Porter library has not been without its pranks over the years. Beyond the myth that the building is sinking, an enterprising student discovered the grid-like quality of the façade. Last spring, pictures circulated online with a naughty word spelled out by alternately raising and lowering specific blinds. Sadly, we can’t print it here.

UW Graphics, 19680927



Do you recognize the building featured in this photo? Do you have a favourite story or historical interpretation of it? Email your comments and answers to Selected comments will be printed in upcoming issues.


Arts Imprint

Friday, january 19, 2007 Arts Editor: Ashley Csanady Arts Assistant: Andrew Abela

Cardiff chides, then charms the crowd Ashley Csanady arts editor

I’ve never really listened to Craig Cardiff before. As I sit across from my photographer, Bomber is transformed into a seedy date bar. Incense is burning and every table has a red candle flicker playing off the faces of the hope-filled dates lining the tables along the stage. Cardiff, as I learned in my pre-concert reading, is a Waterloo native who has independently released eight albums. His most recent album, Auberge Blacksheep, only had a limited release of 300 CD’s in two Ottawa area stores, but several of his other CD’s are available to buy on iTunes. I’m intrigued to hear him play, as Cardiff seems to be a one-man band, playing guitar, accordion, harmonica and singing — hopefully not all at once. While waiting, what sounds like a Coldplay song without lyrics reverberates through the room. I’m thirsty, but the waitress is nowhere in sight. The concert was supposed to start at 9 p.m.; it’s now 9:23 and I’m getting cranky — time for a cigarette. 9:38 p.m. The lights have dimmed, so I’m assuming that the show should be starting soon. Despite my research, I have no idea what to expect; Cardiff ’s sound is foreign to me. The show is opened by Sarah Casey and most of the audience seems much more enthused about her than Cardiff ’s pending appearance. Her music is reminiscent of good ’90s chick rock, her voice resonant and her lyrics catchy. The atmosphere has shifted from the cozy romanticism of the early part of the night to an over-crowded slightly more exuberant mood. The excitement is contagious and I find myself looking forward to Cardiff ’s appearance more and more. 9:58 p.m. Cardiff enters the stage without much fuss. Not to play himself, however, but to introduce Natalie Zimmerman. Cardiff pleads with the audience, who seem more interested in the $6.99 pitchers than what he has to say, to be more attentive. The general din decreases slightly and Zimmerman’s folky-sweet sound fills the room. Her melancholic finale really pleases the crowd — making me hopeful that she will sell enough CD’s tonight to make the long drive from Boston worthwhile. 10:32 p.m. Two opening acts down and Cardiff still hasn’t started his set. The floor in front of the stage is now cluttered with people, and waitresses are struggling to make their way through the crowd. 10:42 p.m. I decide if Cardiff doesn’t show by 11 I’m leaving. Just as I’m vowing to escape this incense-filled wannabe hipster hell, a fog machine starts up on stage and I hope it’s a sign that Cardiff will soon appear instead of a sad attempt on Bomber’s part to make the bar seem like a basement club that only the really cool kids know about. Someone relights all the incense and the overly-sweet perfumed smoke rises as multicoloured lights kick in and start swirling above the stage. 10:52 p.m. Cardiff finally makes an appearance on stage. He seems more than annoyed at the lackluster greeting and asks the audience, once again, to settle down and listen to the music. He pulls the old kindergarten trick, asking everyone standing beside someone who is talking to turn to them and say, “Shut up.” Following this stern warning, he tries to lighten the mood by joking about playing shows in the U.S., using fake sound bites of “typical” comments he hears on tour in the U.S. Examples like “this doesn’t sound like folk music” and “this makes me anxious,” fill the air before he gives up preaching and finally starts to play. Once he kicks into his first song, I realize I have heard Cardiff before — I just don’t know when or where. His music is strong — part

of the folk/rock tradition that Bob Dylan popularized and no one else has ever been able to replicate. Slowly, conversation starts to build again as the novelty of Cardiff ’s initial appearance wears off. Each song still receives an enthusiastic response, and people quiet every time a new song begins — proving Cardiff ’s popularity with the crowd, as he is able to pull their attention away from pitchers and potential pickups. Audience participation seems to be half of Cardiff ’s schtick — and a lot of his appeal. His witty banter makes the show enjoyable, and his melodies are soothing. I feel myself forgiving the long wait, the over-salty fries and my own sleep deprivation and truly relax. The date-like atmosphere has returned and couples are moving closer together, while shy smiles are exchanged by mutually interested parties. Cardiff invites his band on stage with him and also invites the audience to sing along. He mentions Lake Ontario in passing and the Canadiana of his songs, although not the musical styling, makes his lyrics sound like a Sufjan album for southern Ontario. Cardiff even shows his local roots when he jokes that his “anti-war” song is really about living in Kitchener because you can’t afford Waterloo. Cardiff has a commanding stage presence, and while — to his obvious chagrin — a din still fills the room, he has won the crowd over. Their faces are in rapture. The set starts to wrap up, and you can tell everyone is starting to think about heading home, and hoping “not alone.” Cardiff ’s subtle, sexy folk music seems to have set the mood for the many couples filling Bomber on Friday, January 12.

michael l. davenport

FRIDAY, january 19, 2007



Wii... have had two months to play Wii Nintendo

NFL ‘07 take the same route: throw the ball with a throwing motion; catch the ball by extending your arms in a Two months ago, in the cold, wintery catching motion; tackle other players suburbs of Toronto, I camped out by pushing forward on the controller. for a Nintendo Wii. It was a long It’s intuitive, it’s natural, it’s fresh and and arduous night with sub-zero it’s just more fun. temperatures, but 91 other diehards Perhaps one of the best Wii games and I waited in line all thinking that that uses the motion-sensing remote is it would be worth the wait. Some Rayman Raving Rabbids, a collection of huddled in sleeping tents, some 70 minigames requiring the player to played their Nintendo DS wireless twirl, swing, aim and shake your way to multiplayer games, others spoke of victory. In one minigame called “Buntheir favourite moments in gaming. nies are Addicted to Carrot Juice,” you Since then, the Wii has become one of aim at the Bunnies on screen and on the last Christmas’ hottest gifts, quickly remote, while shaking the “nunchuck selling out all across the globe. Now attachment” (the second part to the that two months has passed, the ques- Wii Remote controller) to pump cartion remains: rot juice so that Was Wii worth you can fend the wait? bunnies by Playing the game is an of The raging shooting them fan-boy in me awesome experience, in the face. If that waited 11 that sounded hours outside wrong, you but watching people Best Buy obvihave a dirty pump their arms in a ously screams mind. Graphiyes, as it is a frantic race to the finish cally the game fresh gaming is on par with experience something you line is an experience you will not can find on the that you will not get find anywhere Playstation 2 else. Howevor the Xbox, anywhere else. er, the honest but it’s the pure unbiased anjoy and enterswer depends tainment that on what you are looking for in a is unmatched anywhere else. Playing gaming experience. The system is the game is an awesome experience, nowhere near the PlayStation 3 or but watching people pump their arms the Xbox 360 in terms of technical in a frantic race to the finish line is an specifications — it does not support experience that you will not get anyHD gaming (the highest resolution where else. You will look like a fool supported is 480p), nor will it play swinging your arms wildly, but you can DVDs. However, with its innovative bet on having fun doing it. motion sensing controller, it is the Other Games to look out for: first system that brings people into Zelda: Twilight Princess (a long awaited gaming, whether it’s your younger chapter to the acclaimed Zelda series, siblings or your grandma. now with motion sensing sword Wii Sports, which comes bundled swings), Excite Truck (super fast with the Wii, is perhaps the greatest arcade racing by tilting the controlexample of how the Wii is different ler— just remember to swap in your than anything people previously ex- own MP3s with the SD memory pected from video games. Wii Sports card), Trauma Center: Second Opinion is a collection of five sports games (it’s like Operation the board game, (tennis, baseball, bowling, golf and but instead of just pulling the funny boxing), in which one plays by making bone, you complete an entire surgery), motions just like real life. One swings and Elebits (it’s like hide and seek, and the Wii-mote (Wii’s controller) to you get to trash your room with the swing the bat/racket/golf club, or Gravity Gun from Half Life 2). makes throwing motions with the So, is the Wii worth it? For the low Wii-mote to throw a bowling ball entrance fee of $280, it’s a bargain down the lane (or pitch to the bat- compared to the other consoles. The ter). The game’s depth is shallow at controller may lead to some gimmicky, best, but it truly shines when friends unnecessary features, but it also brings (both gamers and non-gamers alike) along immersive fun for a party. While play together. It’s interesting to see the Wii doesn’t compare to the other games no longer reliant on mastering two systems graphically or technothe controls, but rather on playing the logically, it has something magical game as if it was a real sport. In sports that brings people together like never games on other systems, players have before, and injects a level of fun in to memorize what buttons to press to games that only the Wii-mote can bring. perform an action; with the Wii, play- Would I line up in the cold 11 hours for ers actually make the motions. Instead it again? Probably. But like the Wii itself, of pressing X and Y buttons, players the experience is better shared. just swing their arms to lob a tennis — Harold Li ball. Other sports games like Madden

courtesy Gaming Horizon

Rayman Raving Rabbids features a game where rabbits are addicted to carrot juice.

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FRIDAY, january 19, 2007

Scattered scenes topple otherwise monolithic film

courtesy IMDB

Brad Pitt broods over his injured wife in Babel. Babel Alejandro González Iñárritu

reach heaven. The story ends in disaster as the tower topples over, leaving the human race scattered, disoriented and unable to communicate. It’s an interesting tale whose conclusion depicts our reality accurately enough, but director Alejandro

Paramount Vantage

The biblical story of Babel — as told in the book of Genesis — tells of an ambitious project to build a tower to

González Iñárritu and screenwriter — which loom constantly, especially close-ups, which follow the movements Guillermo Arriaga take the concept during the tense scenes in Morocco of characters in scrutinizing fashion. It’s a step further, transferring the story’s — and instead focuses on the interac- clear that Iñárritu has incredible faith in sentiments directly into our modern tions between characters themselves. his actors to portray messages that the world with their appropriately titled Brad Pitt and Cate Blanchett are somewhat vague script leaves out. film Babel. the most recognizable faces in the The director’s reliance on perforIn an attempt to portray our disper- film and they do their best to con- mance presents the danger of oversion to full effect, the film spans three ceal their own glamour. Though his acting, yet the subtlety of discourse continents and includes five languages. greyed beard does nothing to hide his common to all of Babel’s actors makes The confusion caused by the multitude iconic visage, Pitt’s showy displays are Crash — a movie also about clashing of included cultures is only height- earnest enough that they believably cultures — seem like a public service ened by the film’s erratic progression, belong to his character, Richard, and announcement. It’s important that the which jumps between different cities Blanchett as his wife Susan is just as interactions remain largely restricted to at different times. The technique appropriately dramatic. individuals of the same background. — used previously The exception by Arriaga in 21 to the rule is Chieko, Grams — is effec- The burden of tragedy is so prevalent that whose inability to tive despite the jarspeak essentially ring fluctuations in even scenes of celebration ... are tainted by makes her a forlocation and chroeigner in her own the threat of future calamity nology. land. As such, the The film takes sometimes heavyplace in our conhanded exchanges temporary climate and its characters The two have travelled to Morocco across cultures — such as family chitare influenced by threats of terrorism in an attempt to patch up a marriage chat between Richard and the local and concern over border crossing to the left in shambles by the death of their Moroccan aiding his efforts — are same extent as its viewers. But Arriaga infant son. While her head is pressed avoided, lending a subtlety not found sidesteps the threat of didactic sermon- on the window of a tour bus, Susan in the other pieces of the story. izing by largely ignoring overt politics is wounded in the neck from a bullet Chieko’s part of the film is also fired innocently enough by Ahmed notable because of its loose assoand Yussef, sons of the goatherd ciation with the rest of the events. Abdullah who were charged with Though her scenes are some of the protecting their herd from jackals, most expressive, their relevance to but who turned to competitive target the other characters is minimal, suppractice as boredom struck. While porting Arriaga’s perceived attempt Richard struggles to get to the near- at connecting pieces of the story est hospital and tries to make do with through shared emotion alone. the crude amenities of a local village It has been said that a smile is a smile — against the wishes of his sanita- the world over. The events in Babel tion-obsessed wife — back in Cali- seem only to prove the same for tears. fornia, his two children are left in the The burden of tragedy is so prevalent care of their housemaid Amelia, who that even scenes of celebration — the is forced to take the children along cutting of a wedding cake, flirtatious with her across the border to attend splashing at a Tokyo playground — are her son’s wedding in Mexico. Across tainted by the threat of future calamthe Atlantic we go, where Chieko, a ity. Because of the film’s fragmented deaf-mute Tokyo schoolgirl, stumbles personality, the audience is made aware through adolescent sexual frustration, of some events before the film’s characintensified by her condition and the ters, making Arriaga’s script restrictively recent suicide of her mother. deterministic. His characters are never To say that Pitt and Blanchett’s per- in contemplation, instead fixed in a formances are overshadowed by the rest constant state of reaction. of the international cast says nothing of But the presence of Chieko’s contheir deficiencies. The actors selected by stant exception demonstrates Babel’s Iñárritu — some of whom have never lack of unity, which keeps audiences before appeared in front of a camera reaching for weak associations that — provide such palpable emotional ultimately may not even exist. It’s clear weight to the film that Babel, at times, that Iñárritu and Arriaga are trying possesses the air of a documentary. to portray a message as grand and This is no doubt reinforced by Ro- monolithic as the film’s titular tower. drigo Prieto’s frantic cinematography. But they’re unable to communicate The camera is in a constant state of it and, in the end, it just seems like confusion and is never content with they’re speaking another language. static focus. Views shift abruptly from — Angelo Florendo large, sweeping shots to microscopic

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FRIDAY, january 19, 2007


A new beginning for rock band The End David Halk reporter

Last Friday The End, a five-piece Mississauga rock band, demonstrated to a crowd of over 450 fans that music can still be crafted into new shapes, new energies and new sources of meaning. Aaron Wolff (vocals), Steve Watson (guitar), Andrew Hercules (guitar), Sean Dooley (bass) and Anthony Salajko (drums) sat down with Imprint after playing Kitchener venue The Gig. The ominous silence following their last melodious shrill provided a generous and scene-setting undertone in which to discuss The End’s musical style and upcoming album with guitarist Andrew Hercules. “We’re rock ‘n’ roll,” he said. “We get called something-core, something else-core, but it’s all rock songs, with an evil twist for us.” Hercules expanded upon the dark subject matter and lyrics revealed in their first two singles, “Animal” and “Dangerous”: “The record is about passion. It is about basic human feelings like lust, and how a passion for anything can bring you to extreme highs or extreme lows. It relates to our name, The End, because despite these passions, we’ll all end up in the same place, and this idea is what the album is based on.” Along with the lyrics that delve into passionate emotions, The End’s songs also appear critical of the consumerist nature of our current society. Hercules further explained the lyrics, “So sink

courtesy The End

Local band, The End, tries to move beyond typical music boundaries and avoid being labelled. your teeth into the systems teat and drown/ Quit beating your brains because this is where you belong,” found in the song “Animal.” His response dissolved my pessimistic understanding of the words, disclosing a contented description of our society. “These lines are talking about, especially in punk rock, those who

are constantly rebelling against ‘The Man.’ You can hate the system, but that’s everything you know. For example I hate technology, but I love my guitar rig; every luxury you have is like a cage, and you might as well admit it.” Pausing, he continues, “if you don’t like it, then go into the wilderness and be happy.”

Geriatric gems over mephistophelian monsters ‘10s and ‘30s respectively! Need I even mention the architectural beauty that they were? Sadly, all three of those theatres are no longer playing The Godfather, Taxi Driver or Rear Window for other hungry like-minded members of these new generations to digest. If you were to choose between mass human, advertisement-filled, consumption accompanied by a largescreened new release or a charmingly independent, retro theatre styled, nearly private viewing of new and old releases alike, what would you pick? Is the choice really that difficult? For me, a hugely biased movie lover, there is not even an option for my mind’s consciousness to ponder. Since a young ragamuffin, I’ve had an intimate relationship with the various independently run cinemas across Toronto’s cityscape that play classic films, new releases, second runs, and even festival flicks. Even when I arrived at UW’s front porch as a pocket-protector wearing frosh, robot dog in tow, I quickly formed a life-long bond with Waterloo’s own Princess Cinema (the Original and her younger, more comfortable siblings, the Twin(s)). You could even say that they literally have their hands in my pockets — a lot of the time. Most of my favourite prenaissance films, experienced in the delightful ambiance of sitting on a old music hall balcony, I saw at independently run cinemas such as Toronto’s Revue, Paradise, Royal and Fox — all still standing despite being built in the

... we must nurture those remaining to not allow the larger, wickedly diabolic mainstream cinemas to predate to extinction. Closed this past summer, exactly 203 days ago today, all three of the aforementioned as well as the wondrous Kingsway still leave a large void in my very empty heart. To this day I am mourning their loss, although I must say that the blow was softened by my new illustrious Princess home base. I know what you’re thinking, “As a Waterloo resident, why should I care?” Please do not allow yourself to be so obtuse in the face of such a simple question. National and international brothers and sisters, we must unite to begin to appreciate all independently run cinemas — the “Princesses” all over the globe! The ones down your street, two prov-

inces over, or across a hemisphere — every single last one. Like a beautiful and stimulating endangered species, we must nurture those remaining to not allow the larger, wickedly diabolic mainstream cinemas to predate to extinction. If history has any worthy lessons for us to learn, one of them would surely be that when things or people get old, they are done away with — either by nature or at our own hands. So what of those given the opportunity to live on? Well, they have a chance — but just like the chance we received 160,000 years ago, when the homo sapiens emerged from the messy ancient primates we used to be, they will probably only get one (assuming that you accept Clarke and Kubrick’s version of human evolution). Any opportunity you receive, I implore you, elect to see a film at your local cinema over the centre of your local monstrous parking lot, a Galaxy near you. You will not be disappointed; in fact I’m confident that you’ll be pleasantly surprised. One might say that I’m just a biased dude with an opinion. I say that I am simply a well-informed savant — nothing more, nothing less. I proudly wear the Princess’ schedule, released six times a year into my withdrawal-induced shaking hands, on my plain eggshell white wall — but only because I’m in the know. Hopefully, soon enough, you will be too.

When asked if The End offered any solutions to what appears to be a suffering world, Hercules responded in inexhaustible honesty, “Utopian visions are for dictators and soccer moms. I encourage people to respect all sentient beings, but I am one person, I can’t change it all. If a majority of the world wants to blow us up, whose

to say they can’t?” Remarking, “There is no Utopia, the end is absolute, there is always just balance.” The End’s new album, Elementary, will be released February 6, 2007 through Distort Entertainment (Alexisonfire, Cancer Bats). For more information, visit www.myspace. com/theendmusic.



FRIDAY, january 19, 2007

Bringing a global phenomenon to UW Last week, an article in Imprint sought to expose “the consequences of senseless vandalism,” drawing attention to the V for Vendetta-inspired “crime” on the roof of the Central Services building. I will not lie, dear readers, I was deeply saddened by this searing exposé. Is $100,000 really too much to pay for a highly memorable piece of socially relevant art? Should we not be commending the young hero who had the courage to speak out against the totalitarian regime that has taken hold of our hallowed university? Arts Snobs are urban animals, and as such we are “totally down” with the street art movement. Naturally, we try to downplay our support for the beautification of alleyways and subway cars so we don’t “catch heat” from “the po,” but it is getting increasingly difficult to deny the importance of this flourishing art form. Street art, a broad discipline that includes everything from stenciled images on wall surfaces to 3-D installations meant to interact with the city environment, is inextricably tied to urban culture. It has existed as a subterranean outlet for creativity and subversion for decades, but a new appreciation for its social and cultural relevance is overcoming condemnations of its illicit nature. I came to truly appreciate this reality while braving the insufferable Galaxy Cinemas this weekend to see Alfonso Cuarón’s magnificent Children of Men. In a bleak future of nuclear terrorism, infertility and Kubrick-esque soundtracking, the protagonist visits “The Ark of Arts,” a safe depository protecting important works of art from destruction. Here, alongside Michelangelo’s sculpture of David and Picasso’s legendary Guernica, is a wall fragment with a piece of stencil art by the UK’s most inflammatory genius, the street artist Banksy. Celebration of the piece, entitled Kissing Coppers and portraying two male police officers fondling each other, can only mean one thing: street art is more important than the Mona Lisa. “Property manipulation” can no longer be dismissed as mere vandalism; in many cases it exists as an important, sophisticated form of

expression. Unfortunately, the first rule of street art is to reject the fame and pretentiousness associated with “gallery art,” and indeed the ego of the average arts snob may be harmed by its anonymity and spontaneity. Of course, there are at least some big names you can cite to sound knowledgeable: “Boy, Os Gemeos really did a number on that factory in Sao Paulo.” “Yeah, but you can’t compare it to Faile’s mural in L.A.” Street art’s importance is linked to its accessibility. There’s no admission fee, and the art is visible to the millions who pass through urban thoroughfares daily. In Iran, stencils of Ahmadinejad with a question mark on his face are being recognized as evidence of the youth reform movement. Abstractor’s interventionist art on video billboards in Manhattan exists as an important commentary on commercial intrusiveness. Cum’s wheatpastes of topless women are no doubt scathing critiques of…uhhhh…U.S. policy in Iraq? Anyway… In December 2006, New York’s Wooster Collective turned a five storey building into a canvas by inviting street artists from around the world to decorate the exterior and interior in a celebration of ephemeral art. The independent project received front page coverage from the New York Times, and interested citizens lined up for five hours to tour the final project. A similar event occurred in England in an abandoned factory. It’s time for UW to jump on the bandwagon. In any case, I would never use this widely read, reputable student newspaper as a vehicle with which to encourage any sort of campus beautification, nor would I ever insult the University by suggesting that ‘blank walls equal blank minds.’ It would be terribly irresponsible for me to point out to my dear readers the fine selection of angelo florendo paints and poster materials available at ECH’s ArtWorx, and I couldn’t possibly admit that the ‘vandalism’ of General Services was in fact another way in which UW is breaking boundaries. I will, however, encourage you to appreciate the beauty and relevance of street art, and understand that, indeed, just as anyone can admire street art, so can anyone be a street artist. Good day to you.

Gary Benchley, Rock Star Paul Ford

Limitations Scott Turow



None of it was real. Realistic, sure, but definitely not real. Some figured it out, but thousands fell for it. Regular Jane’s and Joe’s around the world, possibly the only chick drummer from Namibia, bands, literary agents, newspaper editors and more all wanted a piece of Gary Benchley. He wasn’t real though. Gary Benchley was simply a figment of blogger/essayist Paul Ford’s imagination. A personal challenge turned into life dream realization in the form of a faux rock star occasional blog-posting apparition. Soon after, Gary’s life was collected and poured into Ford’s debut novel “Gary Benchley, Rock Star.” Beginning with Albany, New York hipster Gary graduating from college, desperate to rock out. He loves his “moms” but hates his hometown, so he does the only logical thing left to do: he moves to New York City and vows to rock more and enter less data. What he finds, though, is that the real world doesn’t facilitate much in terms of rocking and prefers more of the data entry option. Sure, he ends up moving to hipster-heaven — Williamsburg, Brooklyn — secures a decent job and relationship and even manages to put together possibly the most diverse band in the history of music with a record contract, but Gary’s life in NYC continues to slip deeper into the pits. Ever the optimist, Gary presses on, making all efforts to “accentuate the rock, and mitigate the suck.” I’m a sucker for books that relate to rocking, in any way, shape or form, so there was no way I would pass this one up. The cover sent off warning bells screaming “pretentious alert,” which I have to say, did throw me off. His know-it-all ‘tude and allusions to indie pop culture which only “those in the know” could ever dream of understanding prompted me several times to consider giving up on the book. The conversational first-person narration was big draw for me and really added to the illusion of realism that caught so many other people. Another benefit to the narration is the maturation you can sense in Gary’s speech and behaviour as the book progresses. Additionally, the plethora of supporting characters coloured what would have been a bleak picture. Ford gives each character their own little quirks ranging from the pessimistic gay synth player, the ever-depressed girlfriend, the chick drummer who Gary lusts over, the black journalist from Blender who happens to play bass, the tantric first roommate and accompanying girlfriend too name a few. You can follow Gary’s story online at http:// for free — but without its juicy ending.

Why finish a book you hate from page one? For me the answer is almost invariably, “It was a gift.” Scott Turow’s Limitations was no exception; for some reason I’m often given “mystery suspense” novels to whet my literary cravings. But despite my general antipathy for the genre, I’ve come across a few good crime books in my time — works that serve the simple function of turning off the critical reader my education has taught me to be. Limitations, however, fails even to entertain. I’m barely into the second paragraph before I realize why: “May it please the court,” booms Jordan Sapperstein from the podium. “This case must be reversed. Your Honors have no choice.” Seated behind the elevated walnut bench a dozen feet away, Judge George Mason suppresses an impulsive wince at Sapperstein’s excesses. Excesses? Really? You know, as a reader I would never have guessed from just “Your Honors have no choice” that the lawyer in question was pushing it. Really. Thanks for spelling it out. Not to mention the word “impulsive,” a filler adjective if I’ve ever seen one — the act of wincing being, generally speaking, automatic and not affected. It was at this point I set the book down, only to pick it up again — guiltily — when my sister asked me if I was enjoying her present. “For family!” I sighed, and soon encountered even greater failings in the writing. The plot is thus: Judge George Mason is ruling on an appeals case where the crime is a given, but the statute of limitations is a sticking point. George is receiving death threats; he’s worried about similarities between the present case and his own past; and to top it all off, his wife is undergoing cancer treatment. All the makings of a pretty fleshed out plotline — and in the hands of another writer, it would have made for a good, light read. The problem is, the first half of the book is all exposition, interspersed with the occasional line of dialogue and, you know, action. Now, exposition has its place, but when storytelling takes a complete backseat to character biographies, it’s just impossible to build any sort of forward momentum. When the story actually gets going, there are some moments of good writing, but Turow can’t even write a riveting hold-up scene. And don’t get me started on the ending, which sports the lamest confession I’ve ever read in published writing. The New York Times apparently praised Turow for the “subtlety of his characterizations” and to be sure, Limitations has a diverse cast of characters. And if he had only done something with them, there might have been a decent story in this whole mess too.

— Mohammad Jangda

— Margaret Clark


FRIDAY, january 19, 2007

Army of One Syndicate Villain Bodog Music

The first thing I noticed when I received this CD was the artist’s name: Syndicate Villain. I didn’t know what syndicate meant, so I looked it up in the dictionary and found that it means “Organized crime.” So this rapper is an organized crime villain, with the name of his album called Army of One and who promotes t-shirts with his lyrics and fake blood on them. This made me giggle and think of Tony Soprano and how easily Tony could flatten this young, white rapper with his pinkie finger. Upon listening to the first song, “My Life,” he introduces himself as a gangster who must write because he can’t do anthing else to bring him “fame”. His first few songs sound like they are half rap-half techno, which can be good for clubs and dancing. But listening to the next few songs was disappointing. His lyrics rhyme well but either do not make much sense or they’re kind of silly. In the middle of the song, “When We Ride,” he raps about things not being a joke, with the po-pos and his dick hanging out. I’m not quite sure where his train of thought was going there. “American Dreams,” his next song is a big surprise. He raps about poverty, how sick he is of it and the rich who are living theAmerican Dream.

After hearing this song I thought to myself, “He cares?! Wow!” Although it did not have nearly the same affect that Eminem would have had. Speaking of Eminem, Syndicate Villain seems to echo many of his songs by choosing similar instruments and styles. In his song, “Nympho,” he repeats a musical phrase in Eminem’s song “When I’m Gone,” but it doesn’t make any sense at all to sing that phrase while he’s calling women hoes and bitches. After listening to “Nympho,” I refused to listen to the rest of his CD because it was so demeaning towards women. Overall after listening to this rap CD I had an even worse impression of Syndicate Villian than before I had listened to his CD. If I were to rate it out of ten, I would give it a three. As for recommending it to others, I wouldn’t recommend it at all. — Kristen Flechtman

Pac’s Life 2Pac Amaru Entertainment/Interscope Records

“Expect me like you expect Jesus to come back. I’m comin’!” And the old argument about whether or not 2Pac will return to public eye is hurled forth by the release of yet another album, Pac’s Life. It begins and ends with the songs “Untouchable” and “Pac’s Life” — a nice touch for the whole circle of life

January 18 — February 24 Death to Everyone by Chris Down at Render (the UW Art Gallery) Donations encouraged

bit, but unfortunate in that only one of each version is actually good. You can’t go wrong with featuring Snoop Dogg in “Pac’s Life Remix” and Bone Thugs-n-Harmony in “Untouchable Remix,” but the album took an unexpected turn with Ashanti on another version of “Pac’s Life.” Snoop Dogg contributed to this song because he and 2Pac were boys and he actually knew a thing or two about him. But Ashanti?! The CD is pretty good, but I think 2Pac may be losing his edge a little. And it only took him nine and a half years of being dead to do it. Or maybe it’s because his mom was the executive producer of this album and, despite being a Black Panther and addicted to drugs in a past life, she seems really sweet. Pac’s Life features “Dumpin’” with 2Pac sipping on his Hennessey, revealing one of the most 2Pac-esque of all the songs on the album, telling a story of a young, rough nation. In “Don’t Stop” he argues for “freedom of speech, baby, freedom of speech” by making fun of Dr. C. Delores Tucker who actively rallied against hip-hop music when Tupac was alive. 2Pac as Dr. Tucker “I don’t understand the music, it’s too loud! It’s too rowdy, it’s too violent — let’s ban all rap music! Ban 2Pac!” At least this time she can’t sue him. In true 2Pac styles, it provides an anthem for this rap generation and outlaws everywhere. “Playa Cardz Right (Female)” is 2Pac’s version of playing “some soft shit” and reveals his sensual side. It is meant to complement the other version of this song, “Playa Cardz Right (Male),” which has Ludacris on vocals, “straight-up, stone cold thuggin’.” Pac’s Life is all in all not a bad album. Not a great album, but not a bad one. As a 2Pac fan, it succeeded in making me sentimental for a time when 2Pac songs weren’t mainly composed of other people. — Kinga Jakab

Even when it’s a little misguided, the Cold War Kids have created a sound too nuanced — with equal parts Tom Waits and The Shins — to not find at least somewhat engaging. They deserve at least a few tracks on your soundtrack for crying into your beer at last call. — Jacqueline McKoy

Cold War Kids Robbers and Cowards Downtown Records

Ever wonder what Gavin DeGraw would sound like if you took him out of One Tree Hill’s opening credits and armed him with a 40 of Jack Daniels and an even greater dose of world-weariness? Okay, well, even if you haven’t, that’s what you get in Cold War Kids’ first EP full of bluesy, piano-driven deconstructed small-town gospel-funk. While they might be drawing from the age-old tradition of drunken minstrel ballads, there’s nothing dated about this October 2006 release. One thing that these hipsters who got lost in a tavern have going for them is their ability to weave some morbid yet accessible tales. They’ve got incestuous molesters on a death row pardon in “Saint John,” and young love gone all wrong in “Hair Down.” When these guys are at their best, they’re full of soul. When they aren’t though, all their music does is alienate, with random literary references and fartoo-epic-for-their-own-good tracks, like the album closers “God, Make Up Your Mind” and “Rubidoux.” By this point, lead singer Nathan Willett’s exhausted-sounding (and sometimes exhausting to listen to) falsetto makes this misstep difficult to gloss over.

Life with the Machines Red Orkestra Fading Ways Music

If you ask me, Red Orkestra would be a really good band if they just cranked the distortion a bit. With Decemberists-like vocals over guitar driven accompaniement that takes cues from Bob Dylan for rhythm guitar and percussion, and a little bit of Metallica with a Tragically Hippy aftertaset, there’s a lot to like about Life With the Machine. But without a powerful guitar sound or louder drums, or maybe some backup vocals — anything to make this album feel more significant — I’m not convinced that it makes any kind of impact. It’s the kind of album you’ll see in the 25 cent box at my Suburban garage sale two years from now. It probably won’t sell. Again. So yeah, it lacked kick and was nice, but only if you’re trying to fall asleep.

January 18 — February 24 Somalia Yellow Vignettes at Render (the UW Art Gallery)

Imprint’s watching

January 19 — 25 Snow Cake at the Original Princess 7 p.m. January 19, 21, 24-5 and 9:25 p.m. January 20, 22, 23 $6 from Turnkey desk

I Heart Huckabees

January 19 — 26 Babel at the Princess Twin 4:15 p.m. $6 from Turnkey desk

Thank You For Smoking

January 19 — February 4 Want-Not Aesthetic at the Artery Gallery Opening night at 7 p.m.

Marc Evans


David O. Russell

Perfume Tom Tykwer

January 20 Jen Militia CD release party with The Droops Tickets $10 in advance, doors at 9 p.m. All ages January 21 Play with Clay and learn basic techniques at the Clay & Glass gallery 1-2:30 p.m. and 2:45-4 p.m. $5 each.

Jason Reitman

Snow Cake Mirrormask Dave McKean

January 25 Ian Smith at the Jane Bond Tickets $5 at the door, doors at 8 p.m. January 25 City Wide Panic at Starlight Tickets $5 in advance, doors at 9 p.m.

— Darren Hutz



HOUSING Help shape your student newspaper’s future. Imprint’s hiring committee is looking for 2 fee-paying UW students to help hire our next Editorin-Chief. If interested e-mail Jeff Anstett at president@imprint. SYSTEMS ADMINISTRATOR NEEDED If you have an advanced knowledge of linuxbased small office networks, this is a perfect position to get your start in. -Flexible hours -$11 per hour Email resume to

Imprint is hiring a volunteer co-ordinator for the winter term! Flexible hours, $11 per hour and a great resume builder. Must be eligible for OWSP. E-mail resume to editor@ or drop in to SLC room 1116.

Students Needed to Participate in Psychology Studies. Receive $8 to $12, plus $4 Tim Horton’s. If interested, fill our questionnaire at www.arts. ~gracelab/ questionnaire

Premium three-bedroom townhouse unit in a professionally managed student complex. Perfect for students, close to UW campus. Now renting September or May 2007. Call Perry now at 519-746-1411 for all the details and to set up a showing. Room for rent for a quiet individual in a detached home near both universities. Parking and all amenities. Please call 725-5348. Attention Cambridge School of Architecture students! Live conveniently and comfortably right across the street from s[chool in this beautifully renovated apartment. 4, 8 and 12-month leases available with excellent signing bonuses and rental incentives! Call Perry at 519-746-1411 for more details. Only $369 - Five Bedroom House, must see, goes fast, excellent location, 147 B Weber Street North, Starting May 01/07, close to everything, very clean, free washer/dryer, gas heated, cheap utilities, two full bathrooms, two fridges, hardwood floors & ceramic tile throughout, large private yard and large deck, free parking for five cars, on bus route. $369 per room, per month. Call 741-7724. Only $369 - Five Bedroom House, must see, goes fast, excellent location, 121 B Noecker Street, Starting May 01/07, close to everything, very clean, free washer/dryer, gas heated, cheap utilities, two full bathrooms, two fridges, hardwood floors & ceramic tile throughout, large private yard and large deck, free parking for five cars, on bus route. $369 per room , per month. Call 741-7724. Only $399 - Four Bedroom Housing, 34 Bridgeport Road, East, Starting

May 01/07, excellent location, on bus route, close to everything, downtown at WLU near UW, new, immaculate, open concept kitchen, all appliances, dishwasher, dining room and living room open onto a private balcony, air conditioning, huge rooftop garden patio, complete laundry facilities, dryers free, free parking, gas heat, gas water heater, cheap utilities, on bus route, perfect for students, rents fast, a must see. Only $399 per room, per month. Call 741-7724. for more info and pictures.

HELP WANTED Weekend counsellors and relief staff to work in homes for individuals with developmental challenges. Minimum eight-month commitment. Paid positions. Send resume to Don Mader, K-W Habilitation Services, 108 Sydney Street, Kitchener, ON, N2G 3V2. Summer jobs for medical and allied health professionals – application deadline: January 31, 2007. Work with a researcher conducting research/development focused on arthritis. Successful applicants receive a bursary and applicable travel expenses. Visit for more information. Great job opportunity! Colonial Times requires an extroverted independant person seeking part time employment for one to two years plus. 20 hours per week, $10/hour. E-mail: brendan-sheehan@hotmail. com with resume. Summer of your life! Camp Wayne for girls – children’s sleep-away camp, Northeast Pennsylvania (6/168/12/07). If you love children and want a caring, fun environment we need Counselors and Program Di-

FRIDAY, january 19, 2007

rectors for: tennis, swimming (W.S.I. preferred), golf, gymnastics, cheerleading, drama, high and low ropes, camping/nature, team sports, waterskiing, sailing, painting/drawing, ceramics, silkscreen, printmaking, batik, jewellery, calligraphy, photograhy, sculpture, guitar, aerobics, selfdefense, video, piano. Other staff: administrative, CDL driver (21+), nurses (RN’s and nursing students), bookkeeper, mothers’ helper. On campus interview February 7. Select the camp that selects the best staff! Call 1-215-944-3069 or apply on-line at Let’s make 2007 your best summer yet – Camp Wayne, northeast Pennsylvania, USA. Counselor-specialists all land/water sports inc. Tennis, golf, soccer. Outdoor adventure: camping, mountain biking, climbing/ropes, roller hockey, rocketry, arts and crafts. Water sports: water ski, wakeboard, sailing, canoe/kayaking.Theatre, radio, video, CDL drivers and more. RN’s for our health centre. Let’s get the ball rolling now! Online application or e-mail or 1-888-5492963, (516)883-3067. Imprint requires a marketing sales assistant to aid the advertising/production manager in contacting clients, updating data bases and other office duties on a weekly basis. This position is open to full-time undergraduate University of Waterloo students who qualify for the workstudy program (OSAP recipients and registered in a minimum 60 per cent course load). If this position appeals to you, please e-mail resume to ads@ or bring them to the Imprint office, SLC room 1116 during office hours. Have the summer of your life at a

prestigious coed sleep-away camp in the beautiful Pocono Mountains of Pennsylvania, two and a half hours from New York City. We’re seeking counselors who can teach any team and individual sports, tennis, gymnastis, horseback riding, mountain biking, theatre, tech theatre, circus, magic, arts and crafts, pioneering, climbing tower, water sports, music, dance or science. Kitchen and maintenance positions also available. Great salaries and perks. Plenty of free time. Internships available for many majors. Interviews on February 7, 2007. Apply online at Call 1-800-869-6083 between 9 a.m. and 5 p.m. eastern time on week days. For more information:

Adult Centre, Wing 404. Call Wendy at 519-888-6488 for info. “Graphic Artist and a Recording Secretary” is needed by Waterloo’s Royal Medieval Faire board. Call 519-888-6488 for info. Volunteer Action Centre – connecting talent and community – “Help young people make informed career decisions” For info/registration call Christine at 519-888-9944, ext 47 or “Engage your youth leadership skills” – volunteer with St. John Ambulance. For info call Bob at 519-579-6285 or email “Help prevent abuse” – Canadian Red Cross are looking for volunteers to train. Call 519-742-2785 or e-mail “Love seniors?” – A.R. Goudie Eventide Home is looking for male volunteers to help out in their Men at Work program. For info call Karen at 519-744-5182, ext 207 or e-mail kliphard@argoudieeventide. ca. “Lights, children, action” – K-W Children’s Drama Group is looking for volunteers with interest in theatrical arts who can provide administrative office assistance. For info call Leslie at 519-725-4969 or e-mail “Want to volunteer” but don’t know how to get started, come to Conestoga Mall on Saturday, Janaury 27 from 9:30 a.m. to 6 p.m. where you can talk to reps from the Volunteer Action Centre for more information. Call 519-742-8610 or check out the website at Volunteer Marketing Intern needed at RBC Dominion Securities Inc. starting in February, 10-15 hr/week. This internship will involve assisting an Investment Advisor with various marketing projects throughout the term in question. The intern will be required to pursue various tasks re-

quiring strong communication, organizational and computer literacy skills. Qualified individuals are students with a strong initiative, direction and desire to succeed. E-mail cover letter and resume to jeff.gates@, attention Jeff Gates.

COURSES Industry Summer Training Program for Undergraduates – Application deadline: January 31, 2007. Participate in cutting-edge arthritis research in an industry setting. Salary USD $16-$20/hour. Airfare and initial visa application costs are covered. For more information visit SP-100 Forest Firefighting course, London, March 7-11 or Waterloo, March 14-18, 2007. To register, please call Wildfire Specialists Inc., 2233 Radar Road, Suite 5, Hanmer, Ontario, P3P 1R2. Toll free: 1-877-3815849. Ontario Ministry of Natural Resources accredited. No guarantee of employment.

Campus Bulletin



St. Bede’s chapel at Renison College offers worship on Sundays at 10:30 a.m. or take a break mid-week with a brief silence followed by Celtic noon prayers on Wednesdays. Beginning Janaury 21 there will also be a 4 p.m. worship. For more info call 519-8844404, ext 28604 or

January 2007 We are located on the 2nd floor of Needles Hall and are open Monday to Friday, 8:30 a.m to 4:30 p.m. Please arrive no later than 3:30 p.m. as there are several steps in processing your loan. OSAP deadlines: January 22 - final OSAP application deadline (with reduced funding) for fall/winter term. Deadline to submit signature pages and supporting documentation for fall/winter term, last day to submit OSAP rollover form to add winter term. Scholarships/awards available for winter 2007 on-line at http://safa.

ANNOUNCEMENTS Bands wanted! The GO! Music Festival is currently accepting applications from bands to fill 35 showcase spots. The festival will be held across five licensed venues in Uptown Waterloo March 9 and 10. Submit applications to The Beat Goes On stores in Waterloo or Kitchener or visit the website: Hey students! Tune in weekly to “Morning Drive” with DJ Cool at CKMS 100.3FM for important info on what is happening locally, on campus and in your area. Music, fun and more – Exchange opportunities to RhoneAlpes, France and Baden-Wurttemberg, Germany for the 2007-2008 academic year – to undergraduates and graduates. For additional informatiton and application form/deadlines contact Maria Lango, IPO, Needles Hall, room 1043, ext 33999 or by email: Cigarette study – smokers needed. $70 cash paid. Please state your name, age and brand of cigarettes smoked most often. Call Sandy at 519-578-0873 or e-mail this info to

VOLUNTEER Distress Line volunteers wanted – Canadian Mental Health Association is seeking caring volunteers to provide supportive listening and crisis deescalation to callers living in Waterloo Region. Please call 519744-7645, ext 300. Summer volunteer opportunities with Grand River Hospital/Cancer Centre. Information sesions will be in March, April and early May. Please call 519-749-4300, ext 2613 or e-mail for details. Volunteers needed – volunteer with a child at their school and help improve their self-esteem and confidence. One to three hours a week commitment. Call Canadian Mental Health at 519-744-7645, ext 229. The City of Waterloo have volunteer positions available (volunteer@ “Lunchtime Receptionist” for a Waterloo Older

UPCOMING Friday, January 19, 2007 Artery Gallery presents “Want-Not Aesthetic” by fourth year studio majors from the University of Waterloo from 7 to 9 p.m. at 158 King Street, W., Kitchener. For all dates visit www. Saturday, January 20, 2007 RSCDS Kitchener-Waterloo Branch Annual Burns Supper – at the Woolwich Community Hall, St. Jacobs. For info/reservations call Edith at 519-893-1798 or e-mail Tuesday, Janaury 23, 2007 rare presents “Ice-Age Geology” event from 7 to 8:30 p.m. with speaker Dr. Alan Morgan. For location info/reservation call 519-650-9336, ext 122. Thursday, January 25, 2007 Learning Disabilities Association of K-W is hosting a “Surviving the Homework Nightmare” workshop from 7:30-9:30 p.m. with Wendy McLellan, a Special Education Teacher. Call 519-743-9091 for location/reservation.


Win up to $1,000 for your writing! Students in third/fourth years qualify for STC’s Heidi Thiessen Memorial Award for Student Technical Writing. Visit for details and an application.

S cience A look on campus, for a look outside Imprint

Friday, january 19, 2007

23 Science Editor: Rob Blom Science Assistant: Yolanie Hettiarachchi

Built in 1965, the University of Waterloo observatory offers cutting-edge research and free monthly tours Adam Gardiner Monica Harvey staff reporters

Have you ever gazed up at the night sky and wished that you could somehow get a closeup? Well getting that close-up may be easier than you think. Atop the University of Waterloo’s very own physics building is an observatory where astronomy students can pursue their studies in a cutting-edge environment. But while research into the origins of the universe, black hole dynamics and the nature of dark matter hold promising insights for these students, perhaps the most exciting thing the observatory offers to the general public are free tours held on the first Wednesday of every month. In addition to this, the observatory has twelve telescopes that students may borrow for their personal night-sky gazing. A rich history

What most students don’t know, however, is that the observatory — named after retired professor Gustav Bakos, almost never came to be. The original plans for the Physics building called for a radar unit to be installed on the roof for defensive purposes. At the time, the university, although only two years and three buildings old, was quickly growing into one of the most technologically advanced centres in Canada and officials were worried that the campus might be a target for the Cold War era Soviets. A concrete platform designed to bear the weight of the radar was thus incorporated into the building’s design. Plans for the radar were abandoned, however, before the building’s opening in 1960, and for several years the platform sat unfinished on the roof. It wasn’t until 1965, when the

university began to establish its own astronomy department, that plans were undertaken to convert the emtpy platform into the observatory that remains there to this day. Judy Awbury, in an interview with Dr. Art Cowan, noted that the project was motivated by a desire to attract the man whose name the observatory now bears: “Prof. Gus Bakos was hired as the first member of an astronomy group. Part of the enticement offered to him was the promise of a proper observatory dome, based on the as yet unused concrete pier at the heart of the physics building. He arrived in November 1965 and records show that he carried with him a 12-inch reflecting telescope on permanent loan from Northwestern University. This telescope forms the core of the observatory even today.” Although briefly used by professors in the 1970s to aid them in their research, the observatory has been primarily used for the benefit of students here on campus and the general public. The telescope was renovated in 2002 to become more user-friendly and to increase its effectiveness as a teaching aid to students. It now has a guidance system that allows students to follow a star accurately, despite the constant movement of the earth. A clock driven motor allows students to track a star and also take a digital image. There is also image processing software available that helps produce composite images of the night sky. Open to public

The next tour is scheduled for February 7 and begins at 9:00 p.m. in room 308 of the physics building. In the summer months, tours begin at 8:00 p.m. There are also additional tours

Adam Gardiner

Sitting atop the Physics building penthouse, the Gustav Bakos observatory has been offering students a glimpse of the night sky for over four decades. held for astronomically interesting events; these are announced one month in advance on the UW Astrophysics and Gravitation website. A group tour can also be arranged with Mohaddesseh Azimlu, the observatory’s co-ordinator. For more information about upcoming events you can visit the observatory website at

htm. The website also provides links to the Sky and Telescope online magazine which describes details of upcoming astrological events, NASA’s Astro Picture of the Day and a sky almanac which shows what interesting things are currently visible.

Medical stories of 2006 that shook the world — Part II Faisal Naqib staff reporter

The medical stories that follow continue from the January 12 issue of Imprint. From a new way of helping patients in heart failure to the first successful face transplant — causing a storm of ethical and philosophical debate. These are the stories that made headlines last year. New method for heart transplantation and a mechanical heart

Normally when a heart is designated for transplantation, it is removed from the donor and injected with a high dose of potassium; this stops the heart from beating. It is then placed in ice which helps minimize the amount of damage the heart will suffer during transportation to the recipient. This procedure puts a four to six hour limit in which the heart can remain viable. A new procedure for maintaining the heart during this crucial transportation phase could increase the amount of time doctors have to examine the heart, find the right recipient, and get the heart to them. This procedure would involve hooking the heart up to a device which keeps it beating and supplied with oxygenated blood. This new method was first used on a 58-year-old man at Papworth Hospital in

Cambridge, England and was reported in June 2006 by the BBC News. Doctors announced that the operation was a success and the patient was recovering with no signs of organ rejection. Maintaining the heart in a state of activity with a normal supply of oxygen ensures that no damage occurs to the heart during its time outside the human body. Unlike the hearts that are placed in ice, which are deprived of oxygen, a heart attached to the pumping device is only deprived for 20 minutes, after which any deterioration is fully reversed. This form of transporting hearts is currently undergoing clinical trials with 19 more operations anticipated to happen in the UK and Germany. This method has the potential of increasing the number of potential donors by 50 per cent and tripling or quadrupling the number of transplants. Not only would hearts be handled in this manner, but other organs as well, such as the liver, which is extremely sensitive to oxygen deprivation. Instead of waiting for a donor heart, perhaps a mechanical one could substitute. 65 year old Gérard Langevin of Quebec would certainly agree, he is currently the only Canadian living without a pulse. CBC News reported in December 2006 that Montreal surgeons have implanted a long-term mechanical heart, called the HeartMate II, into Langevin with success.

Langevin was severely handicapped by his failing heart; he was unable to even walk a few steps without becoming winded. He was not a potential heart transplant receiver because his other organs were failing. After receiving the HeartMate II device he has regained functionality and plans on returning to one of his favorite sports: bowling. The HeartMate II is a device, approximately the size of a D cell battery, which connects to the left ventricle and pumps blood to the aorta which then sends the blood through the circulatory system. The device works by a rotating turbine that provides a continuous flow of blood. This means the patient will not have a pulse or a normally measurable blood pressure. Previously, three Canadians have received the device, two of which have passed away and one who later received a human heart. The HeartMate II costs upwards of $100,000 and is currently undergoing clinical trials. It is expected that it will be a few years before Health Canada gives its clearance on this device. First Face Transplant Deemed a Success

French surgeons of the Édouard Herriot Hospital in Lyon, France were able to transplant a face onto a 38-year-old woman who had been severely disfigured by her dog, who scratched and chewed off her face.

The operation occurred on November 27, 2005 but the results of the surgery were published in the July 2006 issue of The Lancet. The surgery claimed to be successful with respect to appearance, sensitivity and acceptance by the patient. It was noted that the patient had no possibility for a normal quality of life with her extensive disfigurement which left her missing major parts of her face. Although the procedure was a success, and the patient was feeling much better afterwards, an ethical firestorm ensued by health professionals regarding the surgery. Ethical and philosophical considerations that were posed included whether the patient was emotionally stable to give informed consent to the operation, the relationship between the face and personal identity and the risk-benefit of the transplant that will require the patient to take immunosuppressive drugs for the rest of her life. A German expert in regenerative medicine noted that since the patient had no prospect of a happy life prior to the operation, and if she can feel comfortable with the restraints of lifelong immunosuppressive medications, then the world must respect her decision. The operation consisted of attaching a nose, chin, cheeks and lips from a 46-year-old brain-dead woman.



FRIDAY, january 19, 2007

New insights into the spin of pulsars David Judah staff reporter

Stars have a lifespan. At a certain point, the energies that fuel them run out, the balanced forces that kept them stable topple over and where there once was a star, there is something wholly different. However, this does not mean that some do not continue to shine. For some stars, death means collapsing into a pulsar, a spinning mass of neutrons. Like a lighthouse, the pulsar sends out periodic bursts of radio waves. This is due to a special feature of pulsars. They spin about once every few seconds, and as they do so they let off regularly spaced pulses of radiation. At first, astronomers attributed their spinning to the spinning of the progenitor star’s rotation. However, this model of pulsars had a flaw, as it didn’t explain pulsars in real life. A pulsar is tiny in celestial terms. It’s about the “size of a small American city, like Raleigh” says John Blondin, an astrophysicist at North Carolina State University, in a news release. But originally, the star may have been bigger than our sun. This is because as a star dies, the forces of gravity outweigh the internal forces expanding the star, which results in the star becoming more dense and collapsing. Anyone who has

taken a course in physics will know that a rotating object that brings its mass towards its centre will rotate faster. A common example of this is when a figure skater draws in his or her arms during a spin to speed up his or her rotation. The problem with pulsars is that when this basic law of physics is taken into account the end rate of spin of the pulsar is many times higher than it is in reality.

Like a lighthouse, the pulsars send out periodic bursts of radio waves. “If you apply that [idea], the neutron stars are spinning so fast that they would just break themselves apart ...something must slow them down,” says Blondin. To explain this unexpected decrease in the star’s rate of revolution, scientists theorized that magnetic fields must be responsible for the slow down. However, it seems to many astrophysicists that magnetic fields alone could not be enough to cause such a massive change in the stars kinetic energy.

A new model for pulsar formation is shining new light on the situation. The model was created using the Cray X1E supercomputer at the National Center for Computational Sciences, one of the few computers capable of mapping and predicting such a massive phenomenon. The program simulated a supernova that creates a pulsar, but differed from the previous ones of its type by mapping three dimensions as opposed to just two. The results were astonishing. “We modeled the shock wave, which starts deep inside the core of the star and then moves outward [...] We discovered that as the shock wave gains both the momentum and the energy needed to blow outward and create the explosion, it starts spiraling all on its own, which starts the neutron star at the center of the star spinning in the opposite direction. None of the previous twodimensional modeling of supernova explosions had picked up on this phenomena,” said Blondin. This counterrotation is what is responsible for the pulsars’ spin. Most impressive, however, is the models prediction, showing that this phenomenon makes pulsars with periods of 15 to 300 milliseconds, right where observations show them.

New evolutionary lineage found in Arctic Basma Anabtawi staff reporter

A group of international research facilities have recently discovered a tiny, new species of algae. The new discovery was reported in Science magazine and received large attention from the scientific community due to the uniqueness of its characteristics. The species is among the smallest of photosynthetic plankton and is a new addition to the picoplankton category. The marine algae were found in the Arctic Ocean and seem to descend from a new evolutionary lineage according to genetic evidence. The Arctic Ocean, although an environment of extremely harsh weather, has been found to contain a variety of exceptional life forms with unique characteristics and adaptations. The new algae contain a distinctive protein family referred to as phycobili-proteins. The size of the organisms and the proteins contained within them aided in naming the

species as picobiliphyta. The peptide sequences found in the algae cells seemed to be located at the sites of photosynthesis, scientifically referred to as plastids. The Station Biologique de Roscoff (SBR) is a marine biology research centre located at a variety of areas in the North, with a focus on learning the physiological and ecological features of the Arctic environment. The SBR has been providing the funding needed for this discovery by dedicating a large group of researchers to study oceanology and find new species. The picobiliphyta were found while the SBR and Alfred Wegener Institute for Polar and Marine Research were working on an analysis of DNA sequences found in seawater. It was a shocking discovery to find the widely distributed algae in the arctic oceans as well as the Mediterranean waters. A molecular study tested the relationships using the S18 gene, which is a gene present in all cells ever discovered and is often used to confirm convergence and closeness between

species. The S18 gene research is based on using computer aids to compare related and unrelated gene sequences — this determines homology and predicts their closeness and common ancestry. The research team was led by Dr. Klaus Valentin and Dr. Linda Medlin, who found that the new algae species has no associations with any known organisms. Algae accounts for over 50 per cent of the global photosynthetic activity; thus, it has great influence and importance in the field of scientific research. According to a new study, scientists estimate that over 90 per cent of the algae has yet to be identified, making this area of research a large window of opportunity for future exploration. The species detection seem to be a good indication of how much is yet to be discovered in the oceans and in the global ecosystems in general, and how little we know compared to the masses of creatures out there waiting to be revealed.

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17th century herbal lore passes scientific scrutiny

When Eric Buenz came across an herbal medicine book dating back to the 17th century, he decided to investigate its claims. The book, authored by Dutch naturalist Georg Everhard Rumphius, said that a tree extract was an effective treatment for diarrhea. Buenz discovered that this extract consisted of nuts from the atun tree, known for its antibiotic-like nature  the extract eradicates various types of bacteria. According to Dr. Brent Bauer, co-author and director of the complementary and integrative medicine program at the Mayo Clinic, many prescription drugs come from natural substances. The invaluable text could lead to advancements in the search for new and better drugs. Chicken eggs may hold the key to beating cancer

The Roslin Institute, famed for cloning a sheep named Dolly, claims that it produced chickens whose eggs may potentially be used to fight off cancer. Since the chickens produce eggs in bulk, acquiring the proteins within the eggs is less costly as the process requires less resources, according to Harry Griffin, director of the institute. Some of the proteins produced in the egg whites include miR24, which may be used to treat malignant melanoma, and interferon b-1a, which may stop viruses from replicating. The proteins can be extracted, purified, and made into life-saving drugs. It could however, be several years before a medicine is fully developed. Details of the latest work are to be published in the U.S. journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. Meteorite fragments predate the birth of the solar system

In 2000, a smooth, red chunk of meteorite was obtained from British Columbia’s Lake Tagish. It has now been found that the piece contains particles older than the sun. Wedged in and protected by blocks of lake ice, the fragments of the meteorite contain grains that seem to

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have been present among molecules that eventually formed the sun and all the planets of the solar system. According to NASA researchers, embedded within the meteorite were tiny, hollow, carbon spheres, measuring a few thousandths of a millimetre across and the grains had varying ratios of different isotopes of nitrogen and hydrogen. In order for these levels of isotopes in the meteorite to be present, the chemical reactions must occur in an extremely cold climate  such as that found in molecular clouds before the shaping of the solar system. It is thought that approximately 50,000 tonnes of meteorite lands on Earth each year, a large per cent of which falls as tiny particles that are rarely identified due to their locations in oceans, forests and deserts. De’Medici poisoned



A 400-year-old murder has been unveiled, according to Italian scientists Donatella Lippi, Francesco Mari, Aldo Polettini and Elisabetta Bertol. The prestigious de’Medici family thrived as connoisseurs of art and kings’ financiers, and ruled Florence and Tuscany from 1430 to 1737. It appears that in 1587, Francesco de’Medici, Grand Duke of Tuscany, and his second wife Bianca Cappello did not die of malaria, as was previously thought; rather, they were poisoned  possibly by Cardinal Ferdinando de’Medici, Francesco’s brother, who was eyeing the title. Speculation quickly arose surrounding the cause of both deaths: it was believed that arsenic poisoning was the culprit, a form of death that was common at the time. Now, experts at the University of Florence confirm this belief, after evidence of the poison emerged in a fragment of femur, beard hair with attached skin tissue and organ remains  obtained from Francesco’s tomb and jars buried near Francesco’s villa. The study is published in the December 2006 issue of British Medical Journal. The Medicis’ former home, Pitti Palace, is now a significant art gallery. — With files from,, BBCNews, and The Guardian

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Friday, january 19, 2007 Sports Editor: Shawn Bell Sports Assistant: Doug Copping

Sports Imprint


Warriors beat York at home after tying Brock on road a pass in the Warrior’s end on the penalty kill and raced the end of the ice to score, for Waterloo to tie the game. Overtime, although the Warriors outshot the Badgers 3–1, solved nothing, and the teams each left with a point, still tied for fifth. Waterloo’s game in hand would come the next night, back home at CIF, in front of a small but boisterous crowd of Warrior fans. York was in town, fresh off a loss the day before at Western, and one point behind Waterloo in the standings. “We knew we needed to win this game,” said Sturch. Even so, and with the crowds noise behind them, Waterloo started slow. The hockey mom beside us started her nasal cheer, “Go York,” and indeed before we knew what happened it was 1–0 for the Lions. The rest of the first period was no better, though Alexis Huber held the fort and Waterloo escaped to the locker room down by one. Simona Cherler While the zamboni cleaned the ice, many Lions could be Randi Wilson (17) is all smiles as Sarah Bryson celebrates her second goal against York. viewed walking around with their helmets off. Of the Warriors, there Shawn Bell outshooting them on the afternoon 31–22. was no sight. sports editor “We dominated the entire game,” said Laura The second period saw a new Waterloo The Waterloo women’s hockey team started Sturch, “we just couldn’t put the puck in team take to the ice. Nadine Vandehuevel, the net.” off the crucial stretch of the second half right off the faceoff, had a glorious chance in with success on the weekend, taking three all alone and just missed. York got a penalty. of four points against Brock and York, Waterloo controlled the puck and had two and staking a hold on fifth in the West more narrow misses. Jenny Bults took charge Bryson led her first line division. of the offense from her spot on the point and After a 1–1 tie in St. Catharines January 13, after Andrea Cs shot was stopped, and mates onto the ice... and finally, Waterloo kicked off the second half at home Vandenhuevel’s rebound was stopped, Jo-anne on January 14 by soundly beating York 3–1. banged her own rebound Scott jumped on the loose puck and beat the The Warriors played a solid game on the sprawled goalie to tie the game at one. for the lead. road against the Badgers, who came into Waterloo seemed to let off after that goal; the contest even with Waterloo, at 10 points Scott took a bad slashing penalty and Mactied in fifth, although Brock had played an donald joined her in the box a minute later. Despite the good effort, it took captain Kaity But again, Huber and her defence held tight, extra game. The Warriors struggled to finish, but thoroughly outplayed the Badgers, Martin’s goal in the third period, when she stole and the second period ended 1–1.

In the third Waterloo’s leading scorer, Sarah Bryson, took control. After the third line had a great shift early to get the puck deep, Bryson led her first line mates onto the ice, promptly broke the Lions’ defence and banged in her own rebound for the lead. The York hockey-mom started whining aloud: “somebody take number 77 out.” The Warriors kept pressing from there. Minutes later Martin’s point-shot bounced off of Bryson, who was setting the screen, and into the back of the net; Bryson’s eighth of the season made it 3 – 1 Waterloo. That was how it ended. With the two points, Waterloo moves ahead of Brock and into sole possession of fifth. The top six teams make playoffs. Next up the Warriors travel to Windsor to take on the last-place Lancers on January 20. The next night, January 21, Waterloo comes back home Columbia Ice Field for a 7:30 p.m. clash with Western. This is the rubbermatch with the Mustangs, who currently hold the seventh seed, three points behind the Warriors. Western won the first meeting 1-0 in Waterloo, and just before Christmas the Warriors snuck out of London with a 3-2 victory. Look for Waterloo to solidify their hold on fifth with two big wins.

women’s hockey standings Team


Laurier 15 13 2 Queen’s 15 9 4 Guelph 15 8 4 Toronto 14 8 4 Waterloo 13 5 5 Brock 13 4 6 Western 13 4 7 York 16 4 11 Windsor 14 3 9


0 0 2 2 2 2 1 1 2

0 2 1 0 1 1 1 0 0

26 20 19 18 13 11 10 9 8

Waterloo goes 1-1 on roadtrip; now tied for third Brody Hohman reporter

The Warriors hit the road this past week for a tough road trip against Windsor and Guelph and managed a win and a loss. Waterloo never found their shot in Windsor, falling 74-45 but bounced back with a gritty 73-68 win over the Guelph Gryphons. The split brings the Warriors conference record to 6-6 which is good for fourth in the OUA West division. The Windsor Lancers lived up to their now 9-2 record and OUA West division lead holding the Warriors to their lowest point total of the year. UW managed just 16 points in the first half en route to 27.9 per cent from the field and 16.7 from the three point line. Lost in the poor shooting performance was rookie forward Alan Goodhoofd making 67 per cent of his field goals, the only Warrior over 41 per cent. He added three of four from the charity stripe to total 11 points in 25 minutes. Matt Kieswetter and David Burnett both had 12 points in the loss but combined for seven turnovers. Windsor’s rebounding caused problems for Waterloo as Greg and Rich Allin each pulled

down 10 boards helping their team out-rebound UW by 13. Ryan Steer led the Lancers, who are now ranked fourth in the country, with 15 points and eight assists. Steer also eliminated UW from last year’s playoffs on a buzzer beating three-pointer. The Warriors were able to put the Wednesday night loss behind them and came out with energy on Saturday afternoon in Guelph. The game set up as a good defensive contest with the Warriors tough defence against the always aggressive Gryphons who are allowing just 64.2 points per game, which is best in the OUA West. An 18-0 first half run that saw eight Warriors score gave Waterloo control of the game and a buzzer-beating Ben Frisby three gave UW a 44-30 halftime lead. In the second half Warrior captain Michael Davis, reported assistant coach Curtis Dauber, “Took over the game on a series of post-ups, pull-ups and spot-ups.” And despite just four assists, as a team the Warriors were tenacious on the boards outrebounding Guelph 42-28, including six from Matt Hayes in just 13 minutes. The Gryphons made a late push and trail-

ing by nine points with two minutes left hit a couple big three-pointers. Making free throws down the stretch helped the Warriors pull away with the victory. Waterloo shot 44.8 per cent from the field compared to Guelph’s 34.5 per cent. UW was also 50 per cent from threeland and 82.4 per cent from the line. Davis finished with 15 points and six rebounds while Matt Kieswetter poured in 19 making all eight of his free throws. J.R. Bailey had 22 points, 12 rebounds, and hit 13 of his 15 free throws in front of a spirited Guelph crowd who now see their team tied for second with Brock in the OUA West with identical 6-5 records. The Warriors host the Western Mustangs (4-7) Wednesday night at 8 p.m. and see the Windsor Lancers again January 20 at 4 p.m. Both games can be seen at the PAC. Simona Cherler

sports Warriors split at LU; unbeaten streak over 26

FRIDAY, january 19, 2006

UW lifeguards in nationals

Jordan Andersen

Jordan Andersen reporter

simona cherler

Split in Thunder Bay leaves Warriors 16-3-1, 33 points. UW is first in Far West and sixth in CIS. James Rowe staff reporter

The Waterloo Warriors men’s hockey team split a pair of games with their divisional rival the Lakehead Thunderwolves on January 12 and 13. Although they suffered their first loss since an October 27 home defeat at the hands of Laurier, the Warriors are still firmly in control of first place of the Far West division with a six point lead and only eight games remaining. Waterloo travelled to Thunder Bay for the games, which were played in front of large crowds of about 3,000 people each night at the Fort William Gardens. In the opening game, Waterloo fell behind 1-0 in the first period, but exploded in the second period when Bryan Fitzgerald, Mike Della Mora, Shane Hart and Jordan Brenner tallied four unanswered goals. Before the period was out, Lakehead’s Michael Wehrstedt cut the lead to 4-2 with a power play goal for the Thunderwolves. The Thunderwolves continued their comeback in the third, scoring an early power play goal and then tying the score at four with just over 10 minutes to play.

Having blown a three goal lead, the Warriors responded, and with nine minutes remaining Frank Fazio buried a shorthanded opportunity to put UW ahead for good. Della Mora added an empty net goal, his second of the night, making the final score 6-4 Waterloo. Della Mora and Fazio each had three point nights while goaltender Curtis Darling made 29 saves in the win. The two teams took to the ice again the following night in a hotly-contested game that saw the two squads combine for 102 minutes in penalties, including 64 in the first period alone. Despite the parade to the penalty box, neither team could get on the board in the opening frame. Darling and Lakehead’s Curtis Whitley shut the door on all scoring chances that the two teams created. Lakehead outshot the Warriors 15-5 in the second period and their advantage in shots translated into a lead on the scoreboard. Brad Priestlay and Richard Molenaar were able to beat Darling and the Thunderwolves held a 2-0 lead after 40 minutes. Waterloo tried to mount a comeback in the third period, but Whitley turned aside all 11 shots that he faced.

Midway through the period, Lakehead’s Andy Zulyniak scored a power play goal that put the game out of reach and the Thunderwolves went on to win 3-0. The win was a big one for Lakehead as they were without two of their top players in captain Jeff Richards and leading scorer Tobias Whelan. Despite the loss, the Warriors retained their position at number six in the CIS rankings with a 16-3-1 record. Having gotten through the toughest stretch of their schedule with three wins in four games against their closest divisional rivals, Waterloo looks to be in good shape to secure home ice advantage and a first round bye going into the playoffs. This weekend the Warriors travel to Windsor to take on the Lancers on Friday, January 19, before the two teams return to Waterloo the following night. The two teams have not met yet this season. The Lancers are currently 8-11 and at the bottom of the Far West division standings.

UW’s Lifeguard Club travelled to Ottawa for the second annual True Two two-person lifeguard competition this past weekend. With 44 teams from all over Ontario, including Guelph, Toronto, Thunder Bay, Waterloo and Kingston, the Warriors competed against some of the best in the province. Eight teams made the trek to the nation’s capital on Friday for the weekendlong contest. Lifeguard competitions consist of technical and physical components. The physical events are relays that incorporate important lifesaving skills. The technical events (which are marked on the treatment applied to victims) include First Aid (an emergency scene (car accident) with multiple victims), Water Rescue (lifeguarding a pool and responding to emergencies) and Priority Assessment (an intense two minute triage situation). This year’s True Two competition had a new category for rookie competitors who have never competed at a provincial competition or True Two before. Waterloo blew away the competition, sweeping the podium for the rookie category. First place went to Amanda Burda and Yuan Zhang, second place was taken by Yee Han Loo and Melanie Josephs and Mark Johnston and Lindy Buzikievich placed third. After preliminaries for the three technical events (First Aid, Water Rescue and Priority Assessment), the Waterloo competitors found themselves with six teams in finals,

one of which was a rookie team. First Aid finals were held in a bar where victims took their places among paying customers. Maggie Turnbull and Alex McManus (UW and Ottawa Valley Lifesaving Club) placed third in the line throw physical event while Carly Gasparini and Jordan Andersen placed third in Priority Assessment. At the end of the weekend, the tired competitors made their way back to Waterloo for a week’s rest before their first practice of the term. If you’re a lifeguard and you’re looking to join in on all of the excitement of Guard Team, or if you’re simply interested in finding out more, check out athletics. for more information.

Simona Cherler

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Brody Hohman reporter

NHL - Brad Richards has 40 points in 48 games and is a -11. After 91 points last year his owners are wanting more. He has been heating up lately and is an excellent buy-low candidate. If you own him, stick with him. - Mike Cammalleri is on pace for a career high 70 point season. - Kristian Huselius is hot right now with 4 goals, 6 points, and a +6 in his last 3 games and is worth a look if you need wing help. - Johan Holmqvist has won 4 straight and an excellent addition if you need G help.

NBA - If you are in need of some assists Earl Watson is averaging 11.3 over his last 3 games to go along with 9 pts, 3.3 reb, 1.3 stl, and 4 threes. - Staying in Seattle, Nick Collison is averaging 20/11/.67/.89 over his last 3 and has been flourishing in a starting role. - Anthony Parker has been beyond great for the Raptors lately playing an all around game, but he’s starting to please fantasy owners too. 17/5/3/1.5stl/.59/.80 and even 7 threes in the past 4 games. - Earl Boykins’ value expected to drop before he was traded to Milwaukee.

For now he should be excellent. When Mo Williams and Michael Redd return his productivity could drop, can the little man get a break? He’s still a very nice player but if you can talk him up to someone and get a more proven guy it’s a good idea. On the flip side of the deal Steve Blake is gelling with AI…he had a career high 25 points in his second game as a Nugget and is doing 16/3.7/5.3/.49 and 9 threes in his last 3. If you need guard help grab him but monitor him closely.


FRIDAY, january 19, 2006


Freestyling yields a world class event in Quebec Ian Lawrence reporter

On January 13 Ste-Adele, Quebec hosted the World Cup of Freestyle Moguls and Aerials. Last weekend, due to a last minute road trip, I had the good fortune to bear witness to UW’s own Warren Tanner competing in the impressive sport of freestyle moguls at SteAdele. For those who don’t know the sport, here are the basics: It is a skiing competition that is judged on a combination of style and speed. A competitor’s score is determined by their performance in three categories: air (25 per cent), speed (25 per cent) and style (50 per cent). Skiers must place in the top 12 in the qualifying round to be eligible to compete in the final round. With skiers contending for cash prizes and world-renowned status, it makes for some very exciting skiing action. The results were a good news/bad news situation. Despite the incredibly poor conditions, Quebec native Alexandre Bilodeau fought through the fog to race and dazzle his way

to third position for the bronze. Warren Tanner had a disappointing fall in the qualifying round, negating hopes for the podium for this particular competition. Next time buddy, next time. To my amazement I found myself in the VIP room, sipping on free beer, and pondering my luxurious environment. I came to the conclusion that regardless of the outcome, the real story into the culture of amateur sports is behind the podium. This is world-class athleticism and as such, I thought the competition would be fierce and cutthroat. I expected to see the ‘win at whatever cost’ mindset that is frequently observed in movies. Instead, I saw nothing but sportsmanship and comradery. Oh yes, the life of an amateur athlete is pretty sweet. It is a lifestyle full of travel, sport, cash prizes, and VIP privileges. Unfortunately, the cash prizes are a rare commodity and the sport is riddled with injuries. Sadly, mogul skier Sandra Laoura from France took a rough tumble half way through an aerial maneuver during a practice run. She currently cannot

feel her legs. I discussed sport injuries with Tanner after the races. “[Mogul skiing] has a 100 per cent injury rate,� he stated in a casual manner. “Technicalities aside.� “What!? Really?� I questioned. “Well, I mean, on average for every one person left uninjured there is someone who has been injured twice; so lets just say a 100 per cent injury rate.� “That’s cool...but a little crazy,� I thought. However, that is their way of life. Most competitors ski until they’re hurt. Of course, becoming paralyzed is an extreme and rare injury. The wide majority of injuries are to the knees, due to the high-speed impact that the knees must absorb over the moguls and during the hard landings. This is the price these athletes pay as they work towards their Olympic dreams and live-out their semi rock’n’roll lifestyle. In conclusion, I would like to wish the Canadian ski team luck with the shorter-than-normal season. I also recommend that everyone should get out there and take the opportunity to watch a world-class event like freestyle moguls.

courtesy Krizsanta Greco

An unnamed skiier inverts a jump on the World cup mogul run.

Exploring Canada’s pasttimes: urban camping vs. winter camping Colin Pardoe reporter

Clive Peters reporter

In Ottawa, if you head west from the Greyhound station you pass under a train bridge and eventually come to the Lansdown Athletics Park — home of the Gee Gees and the 67’s. There is a chain link fence along the perimeter of the park, and beyond the fence, on the east side, is a copse of pine trees whose branches reach together to keep the pine needle bed dry. Here I set up the tent for there was rain in the cold night air and I had no where to go. Urban camping requires, first and foremost, a small tent. The two-man Columbia is perfect at night — low enough to fit comfortably under the pine boughs, with enough room inside to lie straight out on the soft pine needle bed. However, the tent’s tarp is orange, and in daylight makes a stark contrast to the green trees and grey cement of most city parks. There is no opportunity for a fire when you camp in the middle of a city so a warm sleeping bag is essential. Alcohol helps — I had vodka to accompany Tolstoy. In the night the rain turned to snow but I was warm and comfortable in the sleeping bag,

listening to the wet snow padding to the ground, and the traffic going by. And once, early in the morning, a train blasted through and shook me awake. The isolation of winter camping can be felt here too. There isn’t a soul in the world who knows where you are sleeping tonight. It was a beautiful morning when the sun came up, the blue skies cold and clear, and there was nothing to do but lie there and listen to the city wake up. Unfortunately, in the course of the morning’s dozings, I was interupted by a trucker. “You all right in there,� he called out, from inside the fence. “I’m getting up now,� I said. “This is a public park. You can’t camp here.� “I’m moving on soon.� “Good. I don’t want to see you here again.� After I loaded my pack I crawled out to the day. The trucker was sitting in his truck in the parking lot fifty metres from my orange tent. Fortunately, I had a hat. I removed my meager camp and loaded it on my back. The trucker waved goodbye as I walked away.






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would have been better off building a Quinzheer. But we endured the night with our bellies full of beans and black tea, and in the morning we were very cold and stiff.

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Urban camping has long been known by homeless people; students are now catching on to the trend.

Jim and I planned our camping trip into the southern Ontario bush the day before without asking any meaningful questions: Is this wolf season? Do I have a sleeping bag? How far are we willing to walk before cursing the wind and sleeping in a ditch? These might have been of great concern to us if we had not remained oblivious — oblivion being a great asset if correctly embraced. Our mission was simple in premise: walk out into the country, build a camp and sleep. Decisions regarding our progress and direction were to be made when those occasions arose. Nice and easy. Getting to and from camp turned out to be like Kerouac; inspired walks along dusty roads, kilometers of snowy railway lines and hitchhiking. The spot we found was just off a CP rail line in a deep grotto with treacherous sides. Down there we built a fire, set up our tent and laid out our blankets and sleeping bags, for what turned out to be a frigid night. We made tea from melted snow and ate beans cooked in the fire. We had no rum to keep us warm, but it was okay. What we had was the clear star-filled night, a fire and silence. We had our ghostly breath for company. It was very cold and the tent was useless in this weather; we

That trip, we found a certain beauty in Southern Ontario. It is an elusive kind of beauty that cannot be sought out or found in any predetermined way. It can only be sensed and then, if you are patient enough, experienced. The only way to find it is to look between. Ours appeared as the grotto beside some rail lines. It was crammed amid fences, houses and people. It lay between the seen and known landscape. To discover it we waded through two feet of snow in frozen shoes. But it was worth it. As we sat in that grotto, sitting sipping tea from empty bean cans on frozen logs, intermittently searching the sky, listening to passing trains, and studying the shadows cast by the moon, I understood that nature’s beauty is not yet lost to us. It is out there, existing in patches now, scattered areas that must be searched out by pure want but without expectation. That’s the key. You must not expect anything. You just have to believe it will be there. And the good news: it usually is.

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Athlete Profile: Nicole Tisdale Doug Copping

assistant sports editor

Bright-eyed Nicole Tisdale brings confidence and composure to the court. Before her Wednesday evening game, we discuss the love of her life: basketball. Connecting her experiences to themes that affect us all, Nicole talks basketball. BACKGROUND - I’ve always been completive. Everything I do, I strive to do well. I get that from my mom — she was a provincial gymnast and generally a strong athlete. I started playing hardcore basketball in Grade 7. I would barely see the light of day. Before and after practice, I would continue to train. My high school coach, Neil Richardson, would support, coach, encourage, scream and yell. He dedicated his free time to those willing to put forth effort, like when I would come in Tuesday and Thursday mornings for extra practice. It was a labour of love. The hard work was all the fun. I was not especially gifted. I’ve just always worked really hard.

FRIDAY, january 19, 2006

INFLUENCE - In Grade 12, I was invited to play with the Mississauga Renegades with girls who came from across Ontario. My three-hour commute for our weekly practice was worthwhile because everyone on the team was serious — there was no messing around. We were there to work. The entire team was on the same page, and winning the championship that season was a huge high, a reward for our hard work. Most of these girls now play varsity basketball. ATTITUDE - On game day I am ready to go, completely concentrating on what needs to be addressed and what I need to do. My mindset is focused. I block out all distractions. A large part of my job is getting the team pumped up, energized, focused and ready to go. Talent and skill can only take you so far. The majority of the game is mental. With the position of co-captain comes responsibility. Teammates rely on you for support; they look to you for leadership and guidance. You’re constantly balancing between these two different dynamics — yourself and the team — and how we will rise to the occasion. I have confidence in our team and think we have the talent to go far, making this season one of the best yet.

DEDICATION - You have to love it — you have to want to practice and go hard everyday. It takes time — team meetings, scouting, travel, working out. Growing up I could register for soccer, ballet, jazz‌ anything. But I always had to see my commitment through. My parents helped instill a competitive drive. I’ve never quit anything in my life. When pushed past my max, I don’t want to let myself down, my team down or my coaches down. Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you just keep going. For me it comes down to pride. It comes down to determination. But everyone responds to these conditions differently. ENVIRONMENT - When I came to university, I knew I wanted to play varsity ball. That was my passion. Basketball is a huge part of who I am. It has shaped my personality and it has opened doors. Reaching out to youth as a guest speaker has allowed my experiences to influence positive decision making for community. kids Basketball has led me to discover my love for teaching and children. After Warriors basketball, my focus is to be an elementary school teacher. I want to be that positive role model in the classroom , applying the lessons I’ve learned from athletics to teaching.

Courtesy UW Athletics

Best represents Waterloo at East-West allstar game

James Rowe staff reporter

Figure Skating - The Warriors hosted the Winter Figure Skating Invitational on January 13 and 14 and placed third overall in the nine team competition. Brock and Queen’s were the top two teams in the overall standings. The Warriors will now prepare for the OUA championships, held at Ryerson University on February 15 and 16.

Shawn Bell sports editor

Chris Best, Waterloo’s outstanding offensive lineman, recipient of the JP Metras award for top lineman in Canada, and feature of last week’s athlete profile, is off to represent the Warriors at college football’s East-West Shrine game, on January 20 at Reliant Stadium in Houston Texas. Best, a six foot four, 320 pound engineering student, was selected fourth overall by the Saskatchewan Roughriders in the 2005 CFL draft. The game showcases over 100 of the top college football players to NFL scouts. “My performance this weekend will determine the rest of the year for me,� Best said in a recent Imprint interview. Best is the first Waterloo Warrior to ever be selected for the game. Legendary NFL coaches Don Shula (East) and Dan Reeves (West) are the head coaches for the game. “It is not the same as Warriors football,� Best said of his expectations for the game. “It is a showcase of talent rather than a game between two teams.� Kickoff is set for 7:00 p.m.; the game will be televised on ESPN 2.



simona cherler

Women’s Volleyball - The Warriors travelled to Kingston on the weekend and came away with two wins. On Friday, January 12, Waterloo swept RMC 3-0. The next night, they won a tight fifth set 21-19 to beat Queen’s 3-2. The Warriors next game is at home against the Ryerson Rams on Saturday, January 20, at 7:00 in the PAC. Swimming - On January 12 the Warriors travelled to York for a one day meet. Waterloo won many of the individual races and in doing so posted some fast times. This weekend UW will be in Guelph on Saturday, January 22 for a meet. It will be a chance for the team to get comfortable with the pool in Guelph as the Gryphons are hosting the OUA championships from February 9-11.

simona cherler

Men’s Volleyball - The men’s team was also in Kingston on the weekend, albeit with less encouraging results. The Warriors dropped their match with RMC by a 3-2 score after having led 2-0. The next night Waterloo was swept 3-0 by Queen’s. The Warriors’ next action will be on Saturday, January 20 when they travel to Toronto to take on the Varsity Blues.

SATURDAY, JAN 20 Basketball vs Windsor: W@2pm ; M@4 pm (PAC Gym) Women’s Volleyball vs Ryerson, 7 pm (PAC Gym) M Hockey vs Windsor: 7:30 pm, CIF Arena

simona cherler

Track and Field - The Warriors competed in the Can Am Meet in Windsor on January 12 and 13, posting multiple high finishes. Kelly-Lynne Spettigue finished third in both the 300m and 3,000m events, while the men’s 4 x 200m relay team made the podium. Elsewhere, Waterloo’s Julia Malleck competed at the Dome Super Saturday event in Ottawa where she won the 1000m race. Malleck is currently atop the CIS rankings for that event. Women’s Basketball - Waterloo lost two games on the road January 12 and 13; first at Windsor 60 – 57; second at Guelph 72-58. Kimberly Lee led the way scoring, with 15 points and 26 points in the two games. Gillian Maxwell grabbed 20 rebounds in the two games, and Kate Poulin scored a doubledouble against the Gryphons, with 12 points and 10 rebounds. The losses leave Waterloo at 7-7 on the season, good for sixth in the OUA West (the final playoff spot). At press time the Warriors are home to Western. On Saturday, January 20, Windsor comes to the PAC. Game time is 2:00 p.m.

SUNDAY, JAN 21 7:30 pm Women’s hockey vs Western, CIF Arena WEDNESDAY, JAN 24 Basketball vs Brock: W@6 pm ; M@8 pm (PAC Gym) Listen Live on

ATHLETES OF THE WEEK EMEKA UKWUOMA, TRACK & FIELD: A fifth year Kinesiology student from Waterloo, Ontario, is currently ranked 15th in the CIS in the 60m after placing 5th out of 44 participants this past weekend at the Cam-Am Invitational in Windsor. Emeka also placed 10th in the 300m and was the fastest member of the Warriors 3rd place finishing team in the 4x200m relay.

SHERIDAN HINNEGAN, FIGURE SKATING: A 4th year Honours Psychology student contributed the most total points to her team this weekend at the Waterloo Invitational. Sheridan competed in 4 events to help her team place 3rd overall. Sheridan tied for first place in Gold Dance and placed 3rd in the Variation Dance with Sarah Norris. She also placed 5th after skatiing the Bronze Rhythm with 3 other team mates. She then went on to skate in the Synchronized Skating Team event to help her team place 3rd. Her leadership and skating ability was an outstanding contribution to her team this weekend.




F riday , J anuary 19, 2007 imprint . uwaterloo . cavol29 , no 23 Please mail cover letter, resume, writing samples to: Imprint Publications...

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