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IMPRINT The UW Student


Life Centre, Room 1116 University of Waterloo Waterloo, Ontario N2L 3GL 5 19-888-4048


Friday March 15, 1996 Volume 18, Number 3 1 ISSN



it to me...

Iron by Peter Imprint



Lenardon staff



photo by Dave Fisher

Editorial Editor in Chief Assistant Edi tar News Editor News Assistant Arts Editor Arts Assistant Sports Editor Sports Assistant Features Editor Science Editor Photo Editor Photo Assistant WWW Page Editor Proofreaders

Board DaveFisher Sandy Atwal Peter Lenardon KieranGreen Greg K&chick Greg Picken Ryan Pyette Jeff Peeters Christine Cheng vacant Rob Potion Joe Palmer Hank Liao David Bauer Katy MacKinnon

Staff Business Manager Advertising/Production Advertising Assistant Distribution


Marea Willis Laurie Tigert-Dumas Pat Merlihan Andrew Henderson Pat Merlihan

of Directors

President Vice-President Secre U-y/Treasurer Directors at Large



Engineering Society President, Jason Van Dyk if they wanted their personal belongings, which are locked in the office, returned to them. When asked why the locks on IW office door were changed,

Van Dyk said that the major concem was security. The Engineering Society executive was concemed that angry IW staff would damage the expensive office equipment once they learned that the paper would be discontinued.



to page 10

tinges on

Andrew Henderson Jeff Robertson

Alexander Havrlant Adam Evans James Russell



Drewe, Timothy Dyck, CurtisGloade. Jason Gregoire, Andrew Henderson, Tracy Huffman, Ohad Lederer, Patti Lenard, Sara Manning, Heidi Marr, Justin Mathews, Campbell McConnell, Tricia Mumby, Sarah Nicol, Myfanwy Parry, Edward Richards, James Russell, Aman Singh, Paul Skippen, Pat Spacek, Patrick Wilkins, Bryce Williams, Shingo Yuki, The Parking Lot Is Full, and the guysgivingawayfreehotapplecideroutside Math & Computer, Imprint is the official student newspaperofthe University of Waterloo. It is an editorially independent newspaper published by imprint Publications, Waterloo, acorporation without sharecapital.Imprint is a member of the Ontario Community Newspaper Association (OCNA).Fmprintis publishedevexy Friday during fall and winter terms, and every second Friday during the spring term. Imprint reserves the right to screen, &it, and refuse advertising.Imprint ISSN 07067380. Mail should be addressed toImprint, Student Life Centre, Room 1 I 16, University of Waterloo, Ontario, N2L 3Gl. our e-mail address: Our fax number is 884-7800. Anon-lineversionotipriniisakoavailabk on the World- Wide Web at

fter a decisive judgement by the University of Waterloo Engineering Society executive, the Iron Warrior will not be published for the remainder of the winter term. When the staff of the Iron Warrior (IW) went into Carl Pollock Hall on Monday, March 11, they discovered that the locks on the IW office had been changed since they were there on the Friday before. A letter was sent to the IV/ editor in chief and all engineering society reps on the same day stating that the March 4 issue of the IW had been recalled, and the one remaining issue this term would not be published. The letter also included a list of 16 “aspects” of the March 4 issue that the society found unacceptabie. These included factual errors in an engineering society advertisement, an article which ended in mid-sentence, and a few items deemed to be disparaging to the engineering society itself. The end of the letter stated that IW staff should speak to the

“I know a lot of people have done a lot of work for the paper, and a lot of people wouldn’t do anything, but I just don’t know.” Predictably, Iron Warrior staff took issue with the contents of the letter, the shut down of the paper, and the manner in which they were notified. “Their intent seems to be to publicly humiliate US,” complained IW graphics editor Campbell McConnell. Releasing the letter to all engineering society reps and IW staff at the same time “totally ridicules and embarrasses us,” said layout artist, Chris John. The IW staff also maintained that most of the I6 problems that the society executive had with the March 4 issue were unfounded. One complaint of the executive was that the banner at the top of the arts section was cut off at the top. It turns out that the banner was not in fact cut off, but rather an intended effect incorporating two photos and the word ‘arts’ wrapping over the page. In another case, the dates on an Engineering Society advertise-

by Kieran Green Imprint staff


or the second time in two weeks, the TJW Arts Student Union (ASU) locked horns with the Arts Council ocrer the issue of ASU finances. The conference took place at an emergency Council meeting held Tuesday March 12, in the Arts Lecture Hall. At Iast week’s Council meeting (see Imprint, March 8) the Political Science Students Association (PSSA), supported by the majority of the Council, voted to hold the extra meeting in order to address concerns over the ASU budget and to discuss a constitutional amendment being proposed by the PSSA. At that meeting ASU Treasurer Mike Lippert distributed a budget for the 1996 Winter Term. Councillors felt that document was inadequate, and demanded that a more detailed one be prepared for the March 12 meeting. According to the ASU constitution, the term budget should have been presented to Council for approval by the second week of the term. That was not done because of the inaction of previous Treasurer Matt Main. The new budget document was one of the main topics of discussion at the emergency meeting. It

contained a far more detailed breakdown of ASU finances than had previously been released, but also contained major differences from the origi-

Fall Term. In the new statement that number had shrunk to $463.37. The ASU declared its total income for the Winter term to be $17,630.37. ASU office expenses for the term, prestated at i. ._.: ... ‘:5:..,:: I

i .. ..:.,:. ‘%’

to $8I65.84 in the new budget. The grant for the Arts newsletter, the Sphere, rose from $0 to $1000. ASU President Josh Windsor ;~++~ihll+~~ these discrepa ncies to oversights on tt le part of Lippert, who Windsor said is still inexnerienced. ASU’s final balance is still undetermined, .bLLIL”UC~~

ac thprp ic ctill ccl3

l lVl”



nnp q;Cm



grant waiting for approval by the Council. If that Prant is nassed as is_ the c7’----




will v.1.r












$184.57 deficit. If the motion is rejected, the ASU will be $3 15.43 in the black. The Council may also choose : to amend the motion anr 1 grant a Josh Windsor: feeling the heat. lesser sum. _ ” The biggest point of controversy in the budget was nal document. In the budget the $2000 allotment for the ASU handed over last week, the ASU claimed a starting balance of Spring Formal. Council members wanted a more detailed $3376.9 1, carried over from the

breakdown of the costs of the formal. They wanted to know about the revenues being generated by the $20 dollar cost per ticket. Other concerns have been raised about the lack of fundraising events, both on the part of the ASU and the societies, to cover costs. Council members also questioned why the $2000 grant had not been brought before the Council for approval prior to the event. Windsor responded that it was not, because of the failure of the previous Treasurer to present the budget at the start of the term. The PSSA representatives argued that, since the grant had not been presented in an early budget, it should have been put to Council for approval as are all grants. “I agree. It should have been brought before Council,” said Windsor. An argument ensued over whether the Executive are required by the constitution to have all expenditures approved by Council. “If I want to buy a piece of paper, do I have to come to Council to get that approved?’ asked Windsor. In the end, Windsor admitted that the ASU had made misContinued

to page 5



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impressive, both in terms of their content and in the style they were delivered. Speaking with almost no reference to notes, Downey outlined the rationale for continu-


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On a somewhat ironic note, Pak called for the Ontario government to provide funding plans to Ontario universities three years in advance -citing the Alberta model as an ideal. The irony occurs as Pak made this statement almost immedi“What ann I signing here, anyway?” ately after the University of Alberta Students’ Union ing federal involvement in post secunanimously voted to ask Premier ondary education, even exclaimRalph Klein to not attend convocaing, “Thank God for the federal tion ceremonies, where he would while describing the government,” be presented with an honourary federal role in research. Downey Doctorate of Laws. also noted that if the federal govAndrew Telegdi was quick to ernment were able to focus on one speak of his beIief in a healthy area of involvement, he would recuniversity system, citing not only ommend student support. his numerous connections to UW All of the speakers pointed to and Laurier, but also the fact that the creation of a federal “Post Seche was skipping out on his House of ondary Education Caucus” asa symCommons duties to attend the press bol of the federal government’s

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suing Lipczynska. One month later this information from Dr. Gillham was officially confirmed by Dean Thompson. following, Dr. August Lipczynska brought a grievance to Provost Jim Kalbfleisch who, in a letter, replied that she was not entitled to a further term as her contract specified only two years. In

Chen-Wing staff


he University of Waterloo is now defending itself and two metnbers of its administration in related lawsuits totalling more than $3,400,000. Two legal

proceedings were filed after Dr. Ewa Lipczynska was informed that her contract was to be not ex-

tended. Since receiving her PI-D. in Poland 20 years ago, Dr. Lipczynska hai becorn; an internationally known scholar having done work across Europe as well as Japan and Canada. She arrived at Waterluo in the Fall of 1992 to fill a


1994 brought

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two year appointment of Research Associate Professor in the Department of Earth Sciences. Dr.

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his letter, Lipczynska

Kalbfleisch stated that had been notified six

Gillham, Chair of Earth Sciences,

months before contract termina-

allegedly gave Ewa Lipczynska verbal assurance that funding would

be available three years beyond her

tion in accordance with university policy. President Downey sent a letter to follow up the provost’s that



a contract

that would


renewed on the condition that her work was satisfactory. Halfway through her contract she was approved as a Ph.D. supervisor and she was given a joint appointment with the Chemistry Department. March 1994 brought the surprise of no new contract to Ewa

his intent



tract would not be extended. Hitherto and at the time of Jim Kalbfleisch’s administrative review of the filed grievance, undocumented rumours were circulating regarding Dr. Lipczynska’s competence. She claims, and the administration denies that these ru-

colleges and universities in ridings held by Liberal MPs, even Telegdi said he looks forward to “twentyfive to fifty members.” Telegdi also referred to “the layoff of one hundred s and forty faculty” at University of Water100, a misfact Iliter corrected by Downey . Telegdi referred to this downsizing as a “brain drain,” claiming that our productive capacity will be diminished by the process. Downey later staled that he felt the m-ly

retirement would not hurt Canacla in such ;i fashion, but that, “what 1 worr); about much more is what happens to the best and the brightest of our young faculty. They’re our future.” Some students present took issue with {Canadian tax policy, claiming that corporations have it tooeasy. Telegdi cited the mobility of capital in the modem world as ;i deterrent to a more just tax system. The postcard campaign wi I I be finishing up today. Noother events were planned for the “Educlation Builds a Nation” campaign.

LJW mours played any part in the nonrenewal of her contract. Around that time, then UN Faculty Association President, Jim Brox met with Dean Thompson and Provost Kalbfleisch where this issue was discussed. Stating university policy in the doctor’s defense, Brox pointed out that Lipczynska was entitled to notice from the dean twelve months prior to her contract expiration and entitled to a performante review. Both of these did

not occur. Everything is to be settled in court. Last month, a solicitor acting on behalf of Dr. Lipczynska filed a lawsuit against the University of Waterloo and an addit ional lawsuit against Dr. Gillham and Provost Kalbfleisch. General, special. and punitive damages total $9,OO,ooO against the university. In the suit against Kalbfleisch and Gillham, a quarter million is the sum of the general,



punitive darnages with additional special damages and legal costs to be specified. The university will cover all legal costs of Gillham and Kalbfleisch while the FAUW has set up a legal defence fund for Lipczynska.


IMPRINT, Friday, March 15, 19%




ASU Continued

by Patti


Imprint staff


he federal budget was announced last week and ineluded changes seemingly intended to ease the cash burden on university students. The plan outlined by federal Finance Minister, Paul Martin, was praised by some as one that reduced the debt without cutting crucial services. The changes dealing with education include the following: the education tax deduction increases from $80 to $100, the tax credit claimable by parents and spouses of students rises from $680 to $850, the annual contribution limit to registered education savings plans rises from $1500 to $2000, and single parents attending both high school and university will be able to claim child-care expenses as tax deductions. Kitchener M.P. John English and Waterloo M.P. Andrew Telegdi both reacted favourably to the plan, indicating that the federal governrnent is taking necessary steps to help students to afford a quality post-secondary education (PSE). English maintained that “these measures represent an important step in helping Canadians cope with the difficult financial realities shared by governments, universi-

ties, colleges and students.” Student organizations throughout the country, however, have criticized the provisions outlined in the budget as too little and ineffective. The Canadian Federation of Students (CFS), to which UW does not belong, claims that the budget is fooling all Canadian students. It is true that there are no cuts to

The budget is fooling all Canadian students. social programs, but this is simply because this has already been ensured with the creation of the Canada Health and Social Transfers (CHSF). These transfers group together federlll funding for education, welfare, and health. The end result turns out to be a decrease in federal funding in all three of these areas. CFS concludes their analysis of the budget by stating that all that university students can expect significant tuition increases as a result of

Profgets highest by Patti Imprint


Lenard staff

its implementation. The Canadian Alliance of Student Associations (CASA) calls the tax deductions “pittances,” stating that it is primarily the upper-middle class students and parents who will benefit from them. CASA is reacting by organizing a nation-wide campaign to draw attention to the importance of PSE. Its goal is to encourage the federal government to impose national standards on both the cost and quality of university education. The Ontario Undergraduate Student Alliance (OUSA) praises certain aspects of the budget, saying that Ontario will be getting a greater share of the money allotted annually to university education. The budget seems to be moving away from the transfer payments that have, in the past, awarded more money to smaller provinces, to a per-capita basis for payment. in general, there seems to be consensus that the responsibility for both financing and ensuring the standards of post-secondary education, while traditionally a provincial power, should be increasingly assumed by the federal government. This, student organizations agree, is the only way that Canada can continue to produce knowledgable and competitive university graduates.

Canada's honour

his role in the creation of the Canadian Mathematics competition in 1963. This competition was the first developed in Canada, and since its creation, Dunkley has been involved in creating many others. Indeed, last year alone, two more competitions were developed. The goal of these competitions

rofessor Ronald Dunkley is one of 45 ol;tstanding Canadians awarded the Order of Canada this year. In addition to a reception held by the GovernorGeneral, Romeo Leblanc in Ottawa earlier this year, Dunkley was honoured by the Mathematics Department on March 7. . At a reception held in the Festival Room at South Campus Hall, faculty members as well as other members of the community gathered to express their admiration and gratitude for Dunkley’s hard work. Dunkley has been a faculty member in the University of Waterloo Mathematics Department since its creation 29 years ago. He is retiring this year after a long and productive career. Throughout his career, he has trained Canadian teams for the International MathOne of the perks of membership. ematics Olympiad, he has authored six high school text books, and he has chaired two founhas generally been thought to be to identify the few most bright math dations that administer scholarstudents, but Dunkley insists that ships. Arguably, however, his most they accomplish more than this. In trying to explain what this extraordinary achievement has been

is, he begins by explaining that while working as a high school math teacher, he also coached both basketball and football. “I saw students getting excited about these games, but getting bored in class. I knew they weren’t getting bored because I was a bad teacher. It’s hard to get excited about learning math for an exam. “I wanted learning to be fun, and the only way it was going to get fun was if they were learning math for more than academic reasons. Students have to want to know something that they didn’t know yesterday .” As he prepares to leave UW, Dunkley recognizes that it is teaching that he will miss the most. I will miss “teaching and the everyday interchange with young people. It is this interchange that keeps you young. “I’ve realized that a lot young people are smarter than me. I may be wiser because of my experience, but their minds are so alive that it blows me away. “All I’ve set out to do is challenge them, and if we all come way being able to do something better tomorrow, then I’ve won and the world has advanced.”


page 3

takes. “I will take responsibility for everything you (the Council) say that we, the executive, have done.” Windsor said that the executive were benefitting and learning from the criticism, and that efforts for improvement would be made. The second major controversy of the meeting centered around the PSSA’s motion to amend the ASU constitution. The PSSA wants to change the size of the allotment that the departmental societies and clubs receive from the ASU. They want to raise the amount from $2.50 to $3.50 per undergrad student enroled in each department. The motion drew heavy fire from both the ASU executive and many of the society representatives on the Council. They argued that the amendment will only benefit the larger societies. The smaller societies will be hurt because the grant/loan pool, on which they may draw to fund events, will be depleted. President Josh Windsor stated that the system would be unfair. The larger societies would

battle representatives said that the original point of the motion was to bring up the whole issue of ASU financial problems. They suggested that the motion had accomplished that goal and should be withdrawn. Windsor made a suggestion that a better course of action would be to increase the AS U fee levied on each student’s fee statement. It was pointed out that the Engineering Society gets $14 from each student. Tricia Mumby, Federation of Students Senior Officer of Internal Affairs, has expressed her opposition to this idea. She said that she doesn’t believe the ASU should get more money, and that the role and structure of the ASU needs to be “reevaluated.” The PSSA has decided not to withdraw their motion. All the society members are supposed to consult their constituencies about the amendment, which will then be voted on at the next and final Council meeting of the Term, to be held March 26. Overall, the March 12 meeting was marred by considerable confusion over the constitution and

The role and structure of the ASU needs to be “reevaluated. ” be able to decide on their own how to use their monies, but would also have the power to control the smaller societies because they would have to go before Council to get approval for grants. Windsor said that the money each society gets from the ASU is for the funding of events. If societies want more money, they should prove that they can get more members out to their events. Windsor attacked the expenditures of the PSSA, specifically the recent purchase of a small refrigerator for the PSSA Lounge. He argued that, if the PSSA had leftover funds for a purchase like that, why did they need more money? He also questioned whether the refrigerator would benefit all political science students. The PSSA responded that, first of all, the fridge would be available for use by all political science students and faculty, and that they had engaged in fund-raising to help cover the cost. Windsor used overheads and a chart to argue his point. According to Windsor, the ASU is currently forecasting a $1734 loss for the 1996 Spring Term. If the amendment is passed, said Windsor, that deficit will increase to $3773. Some Council members questioned whether the motion was a move to punish the ASU for its budget problems by taking more money away from the ASU. Other

over Robert’s RuIes of Order, which are the basis for the running of the meeting. The executive and many of the councillors seemed to lack familiarity with both. For the first time this term, all members of the ASU executive were present for a Council meeting, In the past, members of the executive have chaired Council meetings. For this meeting Tara Barry, an Arts representative on the Fed Student Council and a member of the UW Board of Directors, was asked to act as a neutral speaker. On two occasions Richard Farmer, another Student Council Arts Rep who is an ex-officio member of the ASU Council, interrupted the proceedings to try ilnd make motions. The meeting bogged down in constitutional arguments over whether ex-officio members have the right to make motions and to vote on them. It was discovered later, after the meeting, that they may make motions but may not vote. Xander LeRoy, Fed Senior Officer of Academic Affairs, pointed out that the ASU constitution is in need of revisions, and suggested that acommittee be struck to that end. The executive responded that a committee would be struck next year. LeRoy argued that the work should begin this year, because the current Council members have experience and ideas for revisions.

Erratum Last week’s IMPRINT reported that each Arts undergrad student pays a fee of $7.50 to the Arts Student Union. In fact the fee is only $7. We apologize for the error.




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fter much controversy and a decisive vote, University ofAlberta’s student’scouncil has advised Premier Ralph Klein to refuse an honourary doctorate of laws degree granted him by the university’s faculty senate. The vote was unanimous: 29-O. Ralph Klein’s government was one of the first in Canada to launch an all out assault on government deficits by slashing social programs. His policies in Alberta are similar to - and just as controversial as Mike Harris’ Common Sense Revolution in Ontario. Garrett Poston, U of A’s student union president, explained the reasons for his council’s decision, noting, “It wasn’t because we don’t think he deserves it.” There were three other concerns voiced by council members. First, the council decided to follow a policy of not granting honourary degrees to active politicians. This consideration is especially important since Premier Klein’s government is so closely associated with social program cuts - including those affecting postsecondary education - in Alberta.

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wo days ago all candidates who ran for the at-large and Arts undergraduate senate seats in February’s election were informed that all results are considered invalid. Mary Lou Klopp of the Secretariat sent an electronic mail message written by Lois Claxton the University Secratary which explained the situation. In addition to the candidates, the message was received by Jane Pak, Mario Bellabarba, Marilyn Webster



170 University Ave. W.

Another point of concern for U of A’s student council was that honourary degrees are given to recognize outstanding contribution to society. It was deemed an inappropriate time to decide whether Klein’s policies are in the longterm interests of the province. Finally, there was the danger of a protest during convocation ceremonies since the Premier would be speaking there. Neither Poston norUofA’sstudent’scounci1 would encourage ;I protest, but it would only take a .rew shouting protesters to create an embarrassing media event for the university. From the time it was announced that Klein would be so honoured, there were strong opinions voiced by students and faculty, both in favour of grdnting the degree and against it. “There were a lot of opinions. It was very controversial,” said Poston. Poston also underlined the dilemma that Klein now faces. One choice is to accept an honourary degree he never asked for and risk an embarrassing situation for the university and himself, should a protest occur at the convocation exercises. The other is to refuse the degree and risk the interpretation that he is snubbq the university.

Senate election invalid by Sandy Atwal Imprint staff


Frid.ay, March 15, 1996 ---

the Fed Executive



Wragge Arts Senator and Christina Ronzio Senator at-large. Stephen Dufour and Andrew Wilson are most concerned as they stand to lose their at-large and Arts seats, to which they were elected respectively. The University Secretary is

named in Senate by-laws to be the Chief Returning Officer of Senate elections. The secretary, however, is CR0 in name only as the elections are run in conjunction with Fed elections by the Feds. Following the Senate election one of the candidates from St. Jerome’s voiced a grievance regarding a number of improprieties that occurred in ballot distribution. A number of students did not receive ballots to vote for the at-large Senator and, Arts ballots were distributed to Applied Health Science and St. Jerome’s Math students. Lois



that these

occurrences indeterminably taint the election process. No mention is made of considering differences in numbers between the Senate and Fed elections as a gauge of the effects. As the two runners up for Continued

to page 9


Friday, March 15,1996

SAC praises, by Paul Skippen special to Imprint


tudents Advising Co-op’.s take on the Co-up Department restructuring: SAC-ie likes it! Well sort of. Well some of it anyway. Let’s just say that the overall idea and structure will ultimately benefit the students, but when it comes to specifics the report is a little malnourished. Before SAC gets accused of rubber-stamping another Co-op Department initiative, from a senior co-op student perspective let’s just say the Department has come so far. But from a more junior student perspective - Co-op has a long, long way to go. First, let’s discuss what we like. We like that the Co-op Department has been restructured to better serve the needs of its three main client groups: students, em-

ployers and faculty. We like the fact that there will be less senior management - three managers (leaders) instead of five or six. We like the fact that the department is now split into Field Services, Program Services and Systems and Administration Services. We like the fact that coordinators are now put into teams based on the four telephone codes 5 19,905,4 16 and 613. And we like the fact that each team will have at least one coordinator from each faculty. We also like the fact that the Program Services Leader must attend SAC meetings according to the job description. And finally, we like the fact that the report acknowledges an open role for students that could include students on advisory committees. To these ideas, we give our rubber stamp. Now for the items that our stamp is pending on...

Close encounters



criticizes To begin with, there’s the mission statement: to provide leadership to individuals and organizations in the pursuit of work/study excellence, optimal performance and career development employment opportunities. This sounds really cool. We have no idea what it might mean, but this sounds really cool. We discussed the mission statement for about 15 minutes and we really couldn’t figure it out. Is the “individuals” students? By “organizations” do they mean employers, faculty, or themselves. When they say “work/study excellence” don’t they mean career development employment opportunities? Perhaps we’re a little biased here, but couldn’t the word “student” appear somewhere in the mission statement? We were under



the misconception that that is why the department exists. Perhaps the student idea is just implied. In fact, a mention of the three client groups in their introduction - students, employers and faculty - would seem a little more logical to us. OveralI the report lacks specifics. They acknowledge this in

thing written. We can’t necessarily agree either, seeing as we really don’t know how these ideas will be implemented. Before SAC can fully endorse this restructuring, we need to see the specifics of how Co-op intends to deliver on these ideas. More importantly to us, the report fails to mention how the department intends to measure success. IkSS~Ort How do theyhow what they are doing right and how do they know what they should improve, i How do they know if the individual teams will all be delivering the same quality level of their introduction. For the most product? part, the document represents a It was discussed in our meetvision of what the department will ing that perhaps they should get an be under the new structure, and IS0 9000 certification - a little except for the forgetting the stuexpensive to actually do. but they dent in the mission statement thing could certainly aim for this level of we can’t really disagree with anyexcellence.

discussed the

statement for about 15 minutes and we really


couldn VjZgure it out.





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$2099 Ambassador Kosh, representative for the Vorlon Empire on Babylon 5, pays a diplomatic visit to IMPRINT. Babylon 5 is a television sci-fi series and the Ambassador here is actually Craig Musselman, a UW student who is unemployed and has time to do things like making elaborate costumes. Musselman donned his disguise to promote Watsfic’s (Waterloo Science Fiction Club) 20th anniversary. As part of the celebrations, Watsfic is holding its 46th Advanced Dungeons & Dragons Tournament from March 16 to17 in the Engineering Lecture Hall, Watsfic is also selling T-shirts for $10. Those wishing more information can contact Watsfic at watsfic @

SPECIALS Creative Labs Discove 4x CD tit $389 Hayes Accura 28.8 F a&I dern (Internal) $249

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886-8008 fax 886-8727 9-6, Fri. 9-8, Sat. 10-5






ya gonna

by Andrea Brady special ta Imprint


his week has been PALS Awareness Week, and hope fully you will have seen some of the leaflets and information that’s been posted around campus or even visited the booth that’s been in the SLC every day this week. The PALS service is provided for you by the FEDS and student volunteers. They are not a bunch of ‘do-gooders’, just ordinary students who realize that life at university isn’t as easy as it seems. They hope to use the resources available to them to help students with any problems they may have or information they may require while at UW or on a work-term. The PALS group consists of five groups all who deal with specific areas of peers assistance. Peer Support Phone Line 8884860 or l-800-704-PALS

SLC Room 2125 Ifyoueverneedsomebodytotalkto for any reason such as a problem with school, any questions youmay have or if you are going through a crisis, give us a caI1. PALS are a service that provides non-judgmental, confidential listening to students. All volunteers are trained in a number of areas including listening skills, cri-




sis intervention, relationships, suicide, and health issues. We are not professional counselors, however, we can help brainstorm for ideas and refer you to other centers who can help, PALS provide a sympathetic, understanding and openminded service and ALL CALLS ARE COMPLETELY CONFIDENTIAL ! We are waiting for your calls from 6 p.m. until midnight, seven days a week. We also have a 1-800 number if you need to call when you are on a work term.



Mediation offers an opportunity to discuss the situation and generate options when mediation through us is not possible (i.e. second part is unwilling or is not a student). Support to peers who are entering a mediation situation with someone other than a peer (i.e. landlord,

Friday, March ~~-

15, 1996


living off campus. Interested students are matched up with an OffCampus Don who lives in the same area. PODS are upper year students armed with training in effective listening skills, knowledge of the many clubs, services, and resources

gram only operates for the fall term, but as the interest grows, it will be continued through the winter term. PHED

- Peer Health Education 888-4567 ext. 5951 SLC Room 2l24A

We are a PALS service for the purpose of educating and raising awareness of health-related issues. We are always trying to improve our service deIivery to the student body and your input is invaluable. The prqjects which we deliver include health awareness weeks, recruitment of speakers on health issues, talks to student groups on health-related topics, information to individuals with questions regarding issues such as eating disorders, health complications, and sexually transmitted diseases.

Peer Mediation 888-4567 ext. 5952 SLC Room 2126 Mediation is a process of conflict resolution that involves facilitation by a third party. The peer mediation program at UW has been designed for students. Our peer mediators only work with students. Therefore, if you have any conflicts with landlords or employers for example, we can direct you to appropriate assistance and provide support in these situations. Through trained student volunteers, we provide a confidential service to students looking to resolve conflicts with a peer(s) (i.e. room-mates, house-mates, friends etc.). Mediation provides a safe and comfortable environment for resolution of such conflict. Peer

employer) is also provided. Educational information about conflict (its effects, different kinds, reactions) and alternative methods of resolution are also readily available. PODS

- Pals Off-Campus 888-4567 ext. 5952 SLC Room 2126

This service



is for any student


available at UW and all the other general university student life stuff, to help their PODIings cope with the stress, tears and headaches of surviving first year. Not only are PODS here to help students with any problems they encounter, we’re also a group of friendly, outgoing people that provide an easy way for off-campus students to meet new friends. We organize group events and gettogethers such as movie nights, mini-golfing, holiday meals, Campus Recreation teams and any other things that suit the PODlings’ interests. At the present time, the pro-

PASS - Peer Academic Support Services 8884567 ext. 5951 SLC Room 2124A Are you having a difficult time with your studies? We are here to help you. We: are a peer service that can help you wifh note taking, cramming, learning skills, time management, course selection/information and how to access tutoring support. Please do not hesitate to call or drop by any of the groups just to find out what we are about and what we might be able to do to help. Anyone interesting in volunteering for any of the PALS groups should either call or visit them, or come by the: FEDS Office, SLC Room 1102,

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hink of theJaws theme song. Now thinkexams. Yes, that’s right; they are coming. Each day they creep closer, threatening doom for us poor students. Feeling stressed? Worried? Perhaps even desperate? Then it is time for you to stop in and see one of the warm, amiable volunteer counseilors in the PASS office.

We can recommend ways of improving your concentration while minimalizing yourdistractions; that is, we try to teach you how to stay awake for more than the standard two minute study period. We are also full of suggestions on how to research academic decisions such as dropping and adding courses. We offer proven strategies for text reading and even for writing exams (please, no applause is necessary). Other than these fantastic serv-

Feeling stressed? Worried? Perhaps even desperate? PASS (Peer Academic Support Service) is a peer support service offered under the PALS umbrella by the Federation of Students. It provides information on learning strategies and study skills to students experiencing difficulties with their courses. One-to-one tutoring services are not available, but we can advise how to get that type of assistance. PASS volunteers also specialize in such areas as time management, notetaking, and procrastination, as well as exam preparation.

ices, we are also planning to hold a workshop in me of the residences. This workshop will deal with the already mentioned issues, as well as attempt to answer any questions pertaining to academics and study skills, so loolc out for posters. The PASS office is located in room 2I24A in the: Student Life Centre (times are posted outside the door). So if those monsterous exams are hanging (ominously over your head, please stop by. Even if it’s just to chat, we would love to see you.


Friday, March 15, 1996


SIRC by Mario BeHabarba President-elect Federation of Students special to Imprint


nterested in Student Issues? Lookin’ For a Job? Well, have I got an opportunity for you! When the Federation of Students decided it was time to restructure the executive, along with the creation of 3 new vice-presidents (and the elimination of two old ones), we also created something called the Student lssues Resource Centre (STRC). The idea was that there should be one central location for information about non-academic issues that affect the student population - things

by Tricia Mumby Senior Officer, Internal


WATgreen? What is that, you ask? Well, WATgreen is a group ‘0’ faculty and staff that first organized themselves in 1990, who *‘envision UW “transforming &elf into a showcase of sustainability, a true ecosystem in harmony with its environment.” They have been quite successful at teaching academic and service departments, & faculty and staff, about “Greening the Campus.” They have also done a great job of working with ERS classes to implement greening projects. Finally, some students have decided that students need to partake in these initiatives

has a job such as gender issues, harassment, AIDS awareness, and human rights violations, to give a few examples. This centre will, of course, need a coordinator - someone who can help people who want information on these issues, and who can organize awareness campaigns to publicize these issues to the general student population. Essentially, this person needs to be able to assist those affected or concerned about non-academic questions they might be having, and try to publicize to the entire student population that these issues exist. The basic job description of the Student Issues Resource Co-Ordinator (at least the one that got submitted to co-op), is as follows:



I) Setting up and maintaining the Student Issues Resource Centre; 2) To act as chair of the Gender Committee, the Human Rights Committee, and the Public Issues Committee; 3) Perform additional duties as assigned by the President; 4) Make monthly reports to Students’ Council on all aspects of the Centre’s activities; and, 5) Put up with having a silly sounding acronym placed before your name. OK, so I made up that last one. Anyway, this is the first year that the centre is ‘in existence, and we are looking for someone with the drive to make it work. We want to

you leave a lasting impression on future SIRC Co-ordinators and Federation of Students Executives, so the first year has to be a good one. Applications can be made in person, or mailed to me in the Federation of Students Office, Student Life Centre, University of Waterloo, N2L 3G 1. We (the rest of the new exec and myself) would ask that you include a resume as well as a letter describing what you would like to see come out of the Centre. The application deadline will be April 1, with interviews taking place during the first week of April. Any questions can be directed towards myself, and I can be reached either at UW x2323, or via e-mail at mbellaba@civil.

ticipate in the Student WATgreen Network; and that the SWN work with the faculty & staff branch of WATgreen on projects and awareness. Right now, one of the most focussed goals of the group is awareness and involvement. Students need to realize that being involved with a group such as this, does not make you a “tree hugger” or any other generalized crazy term like that! We need to realize that there is a lot of waste on this campus. This can often cause unnecessary expenses. The rest of the story is pretty obvious - the costs have to be covered somewhere. As governments waver on their commitment to University funding, students need to be concerned about what costs are

Aside from the ducks, students are the must

populous species on this campus. as well, A very ambitious Environmental Engineering student, Jeremy Steffler, has created the Student WATgreen Network (SWN). This is so necessary, particularly because, aside from the ducks, students are the most populous species on this campus. At the first meeting, two to three weeks ago, about 15 students were involved, and most faculties were represented. I know from my experience of hosting meetings, and trying to get people involved in issues, this is a great turn-out for a first meeting, and it really illustrates the need for this group. Some of (he mandates of this group have already been defined: Pursuing environmental improvement initiatives, while considering the university’s operating budget; ensuring that students from all faculties par-

Election Continued


page 6

the seats have requested that a by-election be held Claxton can see no other alternative. Since no Fed or Senate ehxtion rcgulations apply to this situation, save the Senate by-law that doesn’t allow student by-elections between April 1 and September 15, two alternatives are suggested. The first and most likely is to hold a by-election on March 29 with publication of hundred word bios as the or11y canqxigning.


he wded


Ballot hoxcs would April 17 to give off

being passed onto them. Thus far, the Student WATgreen Network has met twice. We will have a WWW site set up any day now, and we have a newsgroup called uw.watgreen. We have a lot of great ideas for awareness projects, hands-on initiatives for “greening the campus”, and getting all aspects of campus involved. All of this takes people power! If you think you are interested in cutting costs, helping the environment, reducing waste, orfeel that this group should be addressing something we are not - you should get involved! The SWN will meet regularly, and communicate primarily through the Newsgroup. Follow that newsgroup, and come out to a meeting.

L QuadCDRom. ’


problems campus ballots time to return which would mean the seats would be vacant for the April Senate meeting. The second option is to allow Mr. Dufour and Mr. Wilson to provisionally hold their seats until after September 15, 1996 when a by-election can be held. lt would seem that the arrangement that the Secretariat has with the Feds for elections is convenient and time saving. Nonetheless incidents like this show that it might be better if the Secretary took on more responsibility for the Senate elections to ensure they are conducted properly,

Store Monday


to Friday



9:30 - 6:OO - 4:OO





What’ s your react&m tu EngSoc’s &sing of the Iron Warrior fur the remainder of the term?

by Sandy Atwal and Dave l?isher (pIzotos)

“It came down to a power struggle... the paper should have continued.” Adam Corn well

They should’ve tried problems insteadofjust -


“With no Iron for Engineering

“It seems really a communication

“I think they should have kept the paper A lot of people are really upset.” Roya Khuleeli IB Mechanical Engineering

Warrior, students

there’s no place to interact.” Anitu Lee 3A Mechanical Engineering

to work out the shutting it down.” Amy Domaratzki 3B Civil Engineering

sudden. It seems more of problem.” Eric Thomas 2A Electrical lbgineering

sides should


“The decision was too hasty. They should have approached IW about it earlier.” Carrie Junker ;!A Civil Engineen&


“I thought the paper was excellent. It was controversial, but it was being read.” Ian Lanceilotte 4B Systems Design

IW lockout from

page 3

ment were incorrect. IW staff argue that the ad was given to them that way by the Society. Another complaint in the letter concerned a caricature of a “small, angry figure. . . reading the IW. The images seem to encourage the general attitude of recent articles in the paper, which appears to be an attitude of anger towards the Society.” This “attitude” of the IW editorial staff towards the Engineering Society seems to be the real issue, and not just the March 4 issue.


notify IW staff in advamce of discontinuing the paper, the issue was not raised at the joint meeting of Eng.Soc. A. and EngSoc. I3 executives and class representatives held on Sunday, March 10. The next day the locks on the IW office were changed and the letter was sent out. Van Dyk defended the executive’s decision not to consult with other Society members by reiterating the issue of security. If news of the paper’s shut down was made public in the meeting, any disgruntled IW staff could get in and damage office equipment before the locks could be changed.

“We cad let another one like this go out.” -Jason Van Dyk




579-3170445 King St. W. IL-80012643KILL

!“““; ‘-MT @

jobnet ““I** .,,O”IC,‘ *111*1


be shot and pissed on.” Henry Murchland 38 Civil Engineering

Comr, kment your Digmwith hire education,, , -ain to be a


Friday, March 15, 1996



Hamilton . Kitchener





Van Dyk agreed, adding that the reason for recalling this issue and cancelling the next was that, “We can’t let another one like this go out.” According to Van Dyk, Fall 1994 was the starting point of the Iron Warrior’s problems. Since that date, the relationship between the Engineering Society executive tid the Iron Warrior’s editors has been marked by personal friction, a lack of communication, and a reluctance to print Society executives’ submissions in full. The result, as stated in the letter, is that the Iron Warrior “no longer properly or adequately represents the University of Waterloo Engineering Society..& no longer serves as a propaganda tool for the Society.” The Iron Warrior staff also took issue with the lack of consultation by the executive. Nor only did the Society executive fail to

The closing of the paper was also done in advance of a meeting between IW editors and the Engineering Society executive, scheduled for Wednesday. March 13. Layout artist, Brian Cart also disagreed with the tone of the letter. ‘“rhey make us out to be malicious in our intentions.” The disagreement underlying this issue seems to be a gap between what the Engineering Society and the current IW staff see as the purpose of the Iron Warrior. The reason for this gap is most likely the absence of any editorial policy to set out a mandate for the paper’s operation. However, Van Dyk said that such a document is currently in the works and will probably be completed during the summer term. It is hoped that this document will help the Iron Warrior to avoid being discontinued in the future.


is hereby

given of the

ANNUALGENERAL MEETING OFTHEFEDERATION OFSTUDENTS Uakvemky dWatehq a awporuth umkr tbc hw8 d the Pmvimce of Ontario to h BeId an Tuesday, March 1996 at 730 p.m. k the Student Llk Ccatrc Mult&purpoac Room. Tlme agenda tar thb meeting is u fdbnl:






$23.60 per 8tudd

to By-Law



Motbm to amend By-b



1, Artick sptelmbct

IV: “Be it resolved that the Fderath 1, l!wL”

ofStudemta Fee be set at

1, Artkk V, F, aweming Procedum to read aa hbwr: The President shall p”si& 85 Cw of at1annual or general meetings but may at his/her discretim invite any Diredor ofti ccrparatiar to cb 90. lkc&ufe at all annual or general meetings shall except where othuwise set out in the By-Laws, the policies, the pro&ures of the Corporation or in the Corporations Act, be according to Robert’s Rules of 0&r Newly Revised.


to amend By&w

1, h-tick

Vnr, cmccrnhg

Studentr’ Council u f&ma:

To amend B. Powers to read: The Students’ Council shall form Standing Committees whose w of shall be ckemimd in By-:laws and such other committees as it may think fit for conducf of its busmess. to ceopate with dher University bodiw in the formation of joint committees, and delegate dm








representi~es to serve on bodies oulSi& the Utiversity; determine tkie policies and procedures of the Corporalion and &legate any of its powers, while retaining the right of c4mlrol. To amend D. Composition, first paragraph to read: The Stucbzlts’ Council of the Corporation shall be


composed of the President; Vice-President, Administration and Finance; Vice-Prtident, Internal; and Vicepresident. wtirxl; 8Il ex-oficio and a number of elected members as dekrmkd in §VII.& all of whom shali have voting rights. To amendG. Ek&ions, first paragraph to read: Students’ Council elections shall be held in conjunction with the eledon fa tk president; Vice-president, Administration and Finance; Vice-president., Internal; and Vice-President, Education; of the Corporation, in -dance with the appropriate By-Laws, procedures and policies of the Corpcxation. To amend H. Quaum, meetings to read: A quorum for tk transaction of business at meetings of the Students’ Council shall be calculated when the meeting is called to order. It shall mist of a simple majority ofthe voting councillors and the elected Executive that have not been excused by the Speaker. @mm Ml& hd if the number of voting members p-t fall below the original Quorum number, or one-third (l/3> of the total voting membership of council, whichever is higher To&I. Absenteesto red Any voting member of Students’ Council who is absent an&r more than 30 minutes Iate fcr five ear meetings, providing that written notice of said meetings has been sent by Cmda Post to th eddress pmvidd to the Feckrtim of Students by each councillor not less than seven days prim to the said nxxztings, shall have deemed to have relinquished his&r seat and the seat shall be VW AcmGmUxy resolution shall be passed by Students’ Council de&ring the se& to be vacant. TO amend J. Procedure b read: procedure at all meetings of Students’ Council shall, except where otherwise set WI in Ihe By-Laws, in the procedures in ihe Policies of Students’ Couwil or in the Corporations Act, be according to Robert’s Rules of Order Newly Rev&d.

IAWS.procedum and policies of the corpcmion. Inthe~ofav~intheOfficcofPrrsident,oaorbeforeNovemba1,tbr:vscancyshallbefilled in a By-Election to occur xw later than twenty-five(25) days afk tbc position u

to the Policy, pl.mdlm

NovanberI,~vacancyshall~fill~bytheVict-PresibentA~~aad Finmce delcgatiug and dividing respmsibiiities as demed necesmy by the Executive Board. In tie event of a vacancy in the offk of the Vice-president, Education 011or befm November 1, the vamcy shallbe fikd in a By-Election to be fdlcd not later than twenty-five (25) days afkr tk position baanes After November I, the vacancy shall be filled by the President delegating and dividing tesponsjbiiities as kerned necessary by the Executive Board. In~eventthathvo(2)or~~executiw:positionsarev~afterNovemberl,thevacancyshallbe filledbyavding~dMem~selectedbyandontamsatthediscretionoftheBoardofDirectors. To delete from E, Duties oflhe Vice-Preside& Administration and Finance. paragraph 12. To amend F, Duties oftbe Vice-Prekk&, Internal, paragraph 8 to read: The Vice-President, lnt&rnal


To amend V.A to read: l-h following standiq oor&iw will be chaired by the Studeatlssucs Re8ouraccntre~dwill~lotbtprtsit. To amend V.A.i.3 to read: To m efliivc campaigru regard& all genck m. To delete ToruumbcrtberestofII.Aaccc&ngly. To 4 V&ii.5 lo d: To 4 &g&utc sbbar(J in the&aling with auy vidatioa ofhm ri~Irr~iatbtcsnadiencbarladRightsmdinther)eclpstirmofH~RighltrofthEUnilbd NhYl8. To add V.A.iii.4 to red: To promoteEnvironmenlpl issues through the Sadeot W&green Nctwcuk.

ad By-Law commitlee of!3ludmb’ CounciI.


Mot&m to amend By-lmu 5, Committee dRu~~as

z c.


1, ArtiEk XII, cmcemlng Merecada, St&m D to read: The Vice-Pmsident, lnkmal shall recommd a Chief Returning OfEcer to conduct the refdum ratification by the Board of Directors or Students’ Council. Moth

to amend By-b


B. c. 13.

E. F.

tk Residents of the following organktkw: Arts Sndeot Unia Engineering So&y, Envimmental St&h Society,Math Society, !kiemx Society, and Applied Health Sciences Un&rgr8&n~MuntKrs.

To at-n& 1I.B to read: The following shall he non-voting man&s of cbe Canmitta of presidents (subject to §IIl.B.iv which allows the Chairpcmm n vo& in the mt of a tit);

iii) iv)

2, Dutitr and Poucn and Term of 0fTiec ILI folbws: To d the intro&&m to re& A By-Law relating geaerally to the DUTIES AND POWERS AND TERM OF OFFICE of the Shhnt Issues Remurce Centre, Commissims, and Standing Committees of Sets Council Ned in the By-Laws of the Federation of Students, University of Waterloo. ToamendlITerrn~0fficetoread: k TtlClCYIklOftl6CeOfdC ommissions shall correspond to that of the Students’ Council, except as in 8lI.B.


Thetamof~of~ortheCommissionsshalltemrinatewithIheeppointmentoftheir -. lb term ofoke of all Can&&es u&r the jurisdiction of a Cornmissicm shall be defined by the Cammission and shall not exceed that of the Students’ Council except as in §II.D. The term of& of members of Committees shall termhate with tht election or appointment


To deleteIl.A,iii. To rmend Il.Aii toti

9 ii)

subject to

Motion to amend By-b



November 1,h veatq shall k filled in a By-El&km to be filled not later than tweot@e (25) days afk theposib becxxws vacant. After November I, the vacancy shall be Nled by the Vice-President. Intanal detegaling and dividing respcm%biliticJ as ckuned neccssq by the Exuxttive Board. In the event of a vmxmcy in the ofke of the Vice-President, Internal, cm or Mm Novemk 1, the zyz 2 a By-Election to be tiled ad Inter thau twenty-five (25) days after the position




Novanberl,thtvacancyshsllbcfrllcdbytbcV~~tA~stratinnandFi~del~gand dividing responsibilities as w necesuy by the Executive E3oard In the event of a vaancy in the office of the Vice-Fresibent, Administration and Finance on or befare

c. d.


By-Law 1, Ar4kk VII& coacerning Offken dthe CorparptioD 111fdlrmr: To emad AExcndive I&m-d to read:The FMve hard shall consist of a PresiQnt; a Vice-Prcskknt, Administration andFinance; a Vice-Presider& Internal; anda Vice-Fksicknt, E.ducati~. To amendB. Elec& of-, Vice-president A&nin&ation and Finance; VicePresident, Internal; and Vice&&c@ Educationtore& The Rcsi&$ Vice-President, Adminhation and Finance; ViceFkhht, Idanal; ad Vii-Presidm t Fd ucation shall he electedcm the Tuesday and Wednesday of the ~~priatawhatislaw>wnnsReadingW~~gthe~thofFebnruy. Eacbvoting member of the Carporation shall be eligible to ti oclc vote for tBdl of the four pcxsitiuu. Withwr limiting the mty oft& faregoing, the electiotl M be held in 43lxmha witll ttE apprqwin4c By-

to amend

vi) Vii) viii) ix)

lhe Vice-president, Internal,who shall act as Chairpersonof the meetings; the Liaison Cammissioner of the OEia of the Vice-Presi&n& Ix&n& who shall bc the =-ww-Jw the Presidentof the Graduak Students’Asxxiation, &pn“ . of~other~~whichrney~~bystubents’ccsmcllassole~ representingstudents in aparticular ecukmic area; The presidentof ule StudeIItOrganizationsof e8cll of the following professloniklschools: The !Schcmlof Acwntancy The schl of k&it&we The school OmplometIy The !khad of Urhn and Rq#md Phnning the prtsidenl~ of the StudentAssociations of theFederatedand AfIXated church Colleges; the Presidents of the Resi&zwe Couwils in the Villages and the Federatedrind Afliliakd CoUcges. the Vice-President, Fbtion, and the Vice-President. Adrnuustratim and Finance of the Faderationof Students,all ex-oficio; and suchmembersasthecomrmtl4emay,~tirncto~imt,seefitCoappointtotbc~ttet.

0ftbeirzaMXemX. The tam ofdk ofall !bmhg Cunrnim shall mmqxmd to ulat of the Students’ Council, except as in 8II.F. The term of ofice of members of Standing committets shall tuminate. with the election or


appointment of heir SUCCeSSOf.




Mach a.



d. 2.

to dekte 3, Commirrkmr

of tlae Fedtratbn

of Studentr, u tolkmr:

To amend Aii, to be the Academic Commission. ToamedAii,3and4toread: To monitor, initiate and improve programs on campus which promote quality education. 3) To i&hte axI develop progmms to improve students’ involvement in their educatim 4) To amend Aiii, External Commiti~n to reed: To enwurage and develop programs dealing with academic issues extend to the university. 1) To assivt (research, awareness weeks) the Vice-President, Educalion with provincial and/or 2) nstiod lobbying groups. To amend B ii, Liakn Commission, 4) to read: To maintain and update the Federation of Students WebPage. To amend Cl, Publicity Commission, 3 and 7 to read: To maintain regular postings of Federation events and aclwities on uw.gmd and uw.feds 31 nt!wsgroups. 7’1 To assist in pubiicitv of all aqects of Federation of Students activitk

Jam Pmk hident -_-_1_____~1_-_1*__“___CC-___3__-----*----r---------_____________*_**_____I_________________-----











First. dcm’t cvcn try to ml=ss with the p;u-king nazis WI campus;. ‘They’ll tow you rather than look at yw, for cvcn the smallest c iol,ltion Thcrc arc exwptions tu this rule, ofcour~c. It‘ you uork f’or Food Scrviccs in the Studcnt Life C’cntrc, you can park for hour:; immcdiatcly next to a tire hydrant WIthout fear. I c\cn pointed out to a parking scr\.iccs ofiiccr once that this man’s truck N’iis blc~kir~g ~C’L‘L‘SS to a fire hydrant in the P-AL’ parking lot. IIer response: “well, he’s got a pass.” While I’m sure thatjustlficatlon would bc ut’grcat comfort to anyone caught in a IIre in the PAC’, it still reminded ofrhe Bcavis and Hutthcad qisodc when they met Bill Clinton...

it remains to be seen whether sexual assault is as wrong as moonlighting. Everybody remembers that Sehdcv Kumar was detcrmined by Prcsidont Downcy to have scxually harassed a student undor his charge, and was tined six months pay for this crime. There’s another professor who’s up for “detcnuring” right now. Professor Bondy’s offence is holding down a second full-time job, If this guy loses his job for moonlighting, while Kumar keeps his after sexually assaulting a student, then it will be just anottrcr example of the University placing more emphasis on bureaucratic protocol than simple human decency. If WC kcq followIng this slippery sfop~ of wrong-minded dculslons. may& next year Mark Murdoch u ill bc 4hot after I:ood ScmicCs serves its firyt edible mc,rl ;tt ;UI af‘t’ordablc price.

‘W~I longer serves as a propaganda Fourth. ticulty and administrators, with a I-CM’notable exceptions, arc on your side. ‘I’hc vast majority of profs and muck-nmucAs I’ve encounter-od wcrc reasonable, even supportive, in cases where cxtcnuatmg circumstances made my life difficult. Fifth, the cxccptions to the previous pat-agt-aph can be absolute assholcs. ASSHOLES. Thcrc arc some pcoplc around who live for the titles behind their name and will screw you over just because they can. Luckily, though, you can, if your stubborn enough, go over their head. The chances of one asshole reporting to another asshole are rtimarkably low. Sixth, I’ve been reading the Gazette, and the FAUW Forum (for those ofyou who don’t know, the Gazette is UW’s corporate newsletter, while the FAUW Forum is the Faculty Association’s ncwslcttcr), and it secrns that some members of the Faculty Association arc a bit fucked in the head. The Faculty Association wants to unionize. They employ the “straw man” debating technique a bit clumsily. The worst example occurred in an open letter as FAUW President Ian MacDonald warned members to not listen to “threats” by representatives ofthe University’s EIoard of Governors. Only trouble was, a letter from those very representatives was printed right next to MacDonald’s, and they went out of their way to not only avoid threats, but to maintain a collegial environment Methinks the Faculty Association is looking too hard for bogeymen. At least they’re not wilIing to letthe facts get in the way of some cool-sounding rhetoric. Finally, having an Imprint column is cool. Nothing like hearing “You write that shit column for that Anti-Christ ofa paper,” instead of a “pleased to meet you,” when you meet a new person. Oh well. Maybe I made some friends with this piece. HAH!

Iron Warrior btxn turn,

hack suspon&l *for the remainder of the winter by order of the cxecutivc couricil of tine Engineering Society. Notification came by means of letters distributed throughout the f&zulty addressing the shutdown of the paper, most noticeably on the locked doc;r of tht: b-on Warrior office. The contents of the Itlttcr stated in brief that the “paper in its current form was deemed harmful for the image c~,f the Engineering Society.. . and no longer serves as a propaganda tool for the Society.” The letter then outlined particular aspzcts of the March 4th issue that were meant to justify the actions of the executive council. The lrvrl I+brrior staff found both the suspension and the trea.tment of the situation embarrassing, insulting, unnecessarily malicious, and completely inappropriate for members of the Engineering Society. The editors had been notified by the President of the Engineering Society that they were unhappy with the March 4th issue and hence it was agreed that a meeting would be arranged between the staff and the executive council. Before a date for the meeting could be finalized, the newspaper was suspended and the doors locked. This action was felt to be inappropriate and a misuse of power on the part of the executive council. The staff feels that they should have been consulted directly before suspension of publishing and ing MaEazinc






in the event of suspension, the staff should have been notified privately and directly. The locking of the doors of the Iron Wurrior office was irrelevant and served only as a denunciation of staff credibility. On March 11, the cxccutivc council also removed all copies of the March 4th issue from distribution stands. The advertisers in the issue were informed that they would receive a fir11 refund for the cost of advertising. This further impairs the future ability of the Iron Wurrior to financially support itself to the extent that it has to date. The letter distributed on March 11 th contained many misleading statements and assumptions that do not completely rcprcsent the opinions of the engineering student body. Many simply addressed technical problems with the March 4th issue. There was some valid criticism that will be addressed, however, much of the content was irrelevant and did not *justify the actions of the council. Amongst the list of arguments were concerns with spelling and layout errors made in the paper. As theIron Warrior is the work of amateur volunteers, such petty technical mistakes are not of concern of the executive council. There were also comments pertaining to harassment by the staff towards Nancy Baggio’s submissions. We find that it is not unreasonable to request resubmission of disks that do not function properly. The Editorial, written ty the assistant editor, “blatantly bashes traditions of the Engineering Society while offering little in

the way of suggested improvements,” according to the letter in question. While intcrpretation is allowed in an opinion essay, it IS clear that the point of the editorial was to suggest that tradition is important but requires reevaluation occasionally. There is no blatant bashing or anti-Engineering Society sentiments. There were points outlined in the lcttcr that the staff felt wcrc valid and require addressing on our part. The clearest example of this is the addition to the title of the article by the Athletic directors. We concede that the addition of “How much beer we drank at *.*” was out of place and a violation of ncwspapcr policy. It is important to realize that no other alteratiom were made to the article, it was not “co8mpletely alter(cd)“os “twisted into a testimony of drunkenness.” Any element to this ef’fect was not the addition of the Iron Wtwriur staff. In essence the staff of the iron Wm-rior feels that we were mistreated and insulted for our volunteer efforts. The staff’ willingly concedes that we were at fault in some points of the March 4th issue, however, the course of action of the executive council was unwarranted and should be subject to examination. The executive council expressed that “the paper has always been run in conjunction with the Society and for the Society.” We, the staff of thelrurz Warrior, fkel that the paper should be run for the students.

Imprint welcomes fetters to the editor from students and all members of the community. Letters should be 500 words or less, typed and double-spaced or in electronic form, and have the author’s name, signature, address and phone number for verification. Letters received via electronic mail must be verified with a signature. All material is subject to editing for brevity and clarity. The editor reserves the right to refuse to publish letters or articles which are judged to be libellous or discriminatory on the basis of gender, race, religion or sexual orientation. Opinions expressed are those of the individuals and not of Imprint.

Iron curtain Tu the Editor, On Monday March 11 a letter addressed to the Iron Wuwiur staff from the Engineering Society executive was distributed to all classes in the engineering undergraduate fBculty. This letter announced the

discontinuation of the publishing of the IYWI Wurrior for the remaindcr of the term and listed a number of reasons for this decision. This decision was supported by the Dean of Engineering as well as the off stream executive. I am writing to express my concerns regarding the manner in which the recent closure of thefron Wavriur was handled and the attitudes which are becoming prevalent within the Engineering Society. The Engineering Society executive acted in a manner which showed a lack of respect and consideration for all those who volunteer their time towards the production of the Iron Warrior. Within the context of this letter the “Engineering Society” will refer to directors, class representatives, the four executive and any other people who are actively involved in running the Engineering Society. The staff of the Iron Warrior was given no warning regarding its closure prior to the distribution of the letter announcing the Wurri01”s closure. The executive should have contacted these people in advance rather than waiting for lhetn to be informed that their positions were canceled through a public announcement which was distributed throughout the cntirc faculty. This was a blatant display of cowardice on the part of the executive as well as a lack of courtesy and respect to those who worked on the Iron Warrior. The executive is blaming a lack of professionalism by the stafT of the /t-on Warrior. Their lack of respect for the many people who work on the paper was in effect unprofessional. Problems the executive had with the iron Warriw’s presentation and content should have been communicated to the Iron Warrior staff, not broadcast to the faculty at large. The letter which was distributed should have been delivered only to the WLwrior staff and appropriate faculty staff. A different means ofcommunicating the fmn Warrior’s closure to the entire engineering student body shoutd have been employed. The fkt that Iron War-riotstaf‘f‘is now denied access to equipmcnt areas and that they have to be escorted to retrieve personal belanginp from these arcas should not have been broadcast to the faculty at large. By broadcasting this int’ormation to the entire faculty the Executive is showing its dis-

of the iron Warrior staff. It is slanderous in nature and appears to be an attempt by executive to display its power. Some reasons listed for shut-


ting down the paper are ridiculous. Since when does the misspelling of a word constitute an incompetent staff! This type of mistake occurs in major newspapers. Tt is ridiculous for the Executive to impose standards [which are not ethical in nature] deemed as unreasonable by industry on its volunteers. Editorials need not be written by editors. The executive claims that the word “shit” does not meet University standards. lfone were to review the February 23 and March 8 issues of the Imprint one would find use ofthe words “shit” (2X),“bitching,” “damn,” “fucking shit,” “crap,” “pissed,” “fuck” and “mother fucker.” The word “shit” obviously does in fact meet University standards. It seems that some of these reasons are simply excuses. The executive claims that the Iron Warrior has been publishing opinions which do not agree or support with those of the Engineering Society. I was unaware that the Iron Wurriur was a tool of propaganda for the Engineering Society. It should be a an open forum for students to discuss their opinions, whatever the nature. The anger by the executive in this regard leads one to the conciusion that the closure was partially motivated by a fear of criticism and form of selfprotection. This is only one of the recent displays of the Engineering Society’s increasing inability to respect the opinions of people who do not agree with the collective “norm.”



After witnessing the derogatory manner by which the executive has treated its volunteers I am ceasing any volunteering of my time under the existing executive until a formal and very public apology regarding how this manner was handled occurs. FOJ this reason 1 have retracted my application to be frosh leader and changed my intentions to apply for a directorship. 1 realize that my participation as an individual will mean nothing to anyone, however, it is an open statement regarding my dismay with the current state of the Engineering Society and the increasingly prevalent lack of respect it has displayed this term towards its members. -Margaret 3A Electrical

DeFazio Engineering

Iron curtain To the Editor, On March 11, 1996, engineering students were informed that the Engineering Society executive was suspending publication of the Iron Warrior, the engineering student newspaper. Although two pages of specific reasons for stopping publication were cited, among them sloppy editing, sarcastic graphics surrounding articles written by the




EngSoc Executive, and the use of the word “shit” in the paper, the main reason was summarized on the cover letter, “It (the h-m Warrim) no longer serves as a propaganda tool for the Engineering Society.” Perhaps the suspension could have been avoided if theIron Wwrids name had been changed to the “Pravda,” or the “Iron Fist.” The Executive must recognize that, as in any democratic body, there are members unhappy with the executive, and that the Iron Warrior, “The Magazine of the University of Waterloo Engineering Society,” (and hence, of the engineering student body), is the most ideal place to voice these concerns. The Executive and the Iron Warrior staff must meet and resolve their differences privately and professionally, so that publication of the magazine can continue as soon as possible. The executive must recognize the Iron Warrior as a forum for free discussion, and not a flyer solely for reports of the latest bowling event. The Iron Warrior staff must recognize that articles from both the executive and the students must be published without favoritism and without mutilation. Otherwise, the society’s only voice for discussion, information, and feedback is in jeopordy not just for this term, but for many terms to come. -Matthew A. Hately 33 Civil Engineering


Iron curtain Tu the Ed&w,

It has come to my attention of the engineering faculty has been shut down. The Engineering Magazine lrorz Warrior has been canceled for the rest ofthe term as the abusive executive of EngSoc suppressed this medium. 1 was very shocked by this incident since 1 thought of this paper as the medium by which engineering students expressed their ideas and critiques to the executive. This executive is silencing the same student body that voted them in. On March 11, the executive of the Engineering Society took a step that dismantles their credibility as our leaders. In a quest of power, they have silenced the most popular medium that has been available to engineering students to express their opinion. The Iron Warrior has been stepped under the sole of the very own executive body that is supposed to support the right of every Canadian to express their mind. The Iron Warrior has been one medium that has given the opportunity to many engineering students communicate and reveal their cultural experiences to their fellow students. It almost seems that as many developing countries gear up towards the idea of democracy, the leaders of the Engineering Society are stopping backwards into a phase of suppression ofexpression. These are the ‘YOs, an era that is supposed to support freedom of speech and press. As leaders as these members of the executive are, they find themselves in a position of being criticized. Part of being a leader is to learn how to deal with others’ criticisms. If they cannot take the heat, they should step down, instead of taking a step towards abuse of power. This is not a popularity contest whcrc cvcrything is “rosey.” The suppression of this magazine damages the very own reputation that these “leaders” are trying to protect. I’m just asking, Why??? Is it because this magazine ‘has become very independent from this society or is it because of the idea of frccdom of speech??? that the voice





To the Editm-, As a graduate in the Department of Health Studies and Gerontology, I was quite disappointed to see the tobacco ads recently run in tile Imprint. There is an abundance of scientific evidence showing the causal relations’hip between


to page 14


14 Ccmtinued


page 13

smoking and disease (e.g. cancer, heart disease). 1 assumed that this information was common knowledge. However, in a recent article in the “Second Opinion” section of the KW Rrcnd, a member of the health cart community denied that this causal relationship existed. I found this very disturbing. It seems that not all members of society understand and/or accept the risks involved with smoking. Running these tobacco ads, in my opinion, promotes this ignorance. I think that the Imprint should abandon this ad campaign. -Ciwrie McAiney Dept. of Health Studies Geron tulogy

Evil To tk




What you’re doing may cause young people to think less about smoking. If a person doesn’t start before the age of 20 they probably never will. Smoking increases a person’s risk for lung cancer and cardiovascular disease. Lung cancer is a really terrible way to die. Lung cancer kills more women now than breast cantor. L4ddicted women have a hard time cutting down when pregnant. People have enough to deal with; why potentially add to their problems?

-fcnnif;er Long Hvulth






Tu the Editor, Once again, Imprint has mana few pcoplc out there enough to compel them to respond. So you knew that a letter like this, a response to their letters, couldn’t be far behind. First, let me acknowledge my biases. 1 don’t smoke, don’t believe in it, and second-hand smoke really bothers me. However, I come from Delhi, Ontario, the unofficial tobacco capita1 of Canada. I was born and raised on a tobacco f‘arrn, and tobacco money (and OSAP) is what is putting me through university. If tobacco were to be banned the whole area where 1 come f?om would probably die. I also volunjeer forlmprint, but have no say in advertising decisions and could care less who advertises in the paper. I will attempt to be as objective as possible. That aside, let me deal with a few problems that l have with the responses from last week. First, Bruce Borgundvaag stated, “A university is supposed to be a place of higher learning, where young adults come to grow, learn and mature.” Obviously. But don’t you think that these growing, learning and maturing students are capable of weighing all the factors and making an informed decision? People at university aren’t stupid. By now they know that smoking is bad for aged to offend

their health and if they still want to smoke, that’s their problem. They can live - and possibly c?ie .---..with the consequences. Give us some credit. We’re not a bunch oi‘mrndless, susceptible followtlrs wait& to be told what to do. That’s w-l-q WC got out of high school. As for tobacco advertising in general, why not? It’s legal, and anti-smoking groups have been doing it for years. The advertising is not meant to lure in new smokers (not with those big warnings on them,itwouldbeawasteofmoney), the advertising is there to lure current smokers to try their brand. Like it or not, tobacco companies want to make money. If they have the option to advertise, they’d be stupid not to. Should lmprint have run the ad? Yes. 1 won’t even start into freedom of speech and other basic rights. These issues have already been dealt with. I’m not even sure if’ money’s an issue. although 1: imagine that they did receive a good sum of revenue. al1 of which will go back into making your student newspaper even better (besides, they may need the money, what with all the people demanding refunds). The simple fact is that there were no legal or moral grounds on which not to run the ad. The tobacco industry must be treated the same as every other advertiser who wishes to advertise in the paper. Imprint didn’t discriminate against the Menstrual Cup ad on page 8, which some people may find too offensive. While that may bc going to extrcmcs, it is not a stretch to sa;’ that many of the firms who advertise in the paper have their detractors as well. Remember equal rights. Some of the letters take exception to Dave Fisher’s comparison of the tobacco industry to the alcohol industry, which also advertises in Imprint. Mr. Borgundvaag {I don’t mean to pick on him, I’m responding to everybody who sent in letters) claims that “. . .alcohol use does not expose non-drinkers to a toxic by-product.. .” Then under what class would you put drunk driving? People who drink and drive put the lives of others in danger as soon as they take the wheel. At least if someone around me is smoking, I can excuse myself from their presence if 1 so choose. Innocent people driving in their cars, or even walking on sidewaIks, have no such option. As for young children being drawn to smoking by a cartoon camel... please. The majority of younger children start smoking not because a camel says it’s cool, but because of peer pressure. What really pisses me off is when people start ret&ring to the tobacco industry as murderers. Get off your moral high horse and use some common sense. Have you ever seen a member of the tobacco industry tie someone down and make them smoke a cigarette? You can’t force people to smoke. And where do you get murder fi-om? If people didn’t want cigarettes, they wouldn’t buy them. The fact of the matter is that people want to smoke, and the tobacco industries supply them with what they want. Simple supply and demand. If smokers want to harm themselves, that’s their prerogative. Smoking cigarettes is suicide on the part of smokers, not murder on the part of the industry. So before you start calling Imprint


murderers, use your brain and rzad a dictionary. Nexttimeyoupickupacopyof Imprint, and you read an artkcle that you don’t agree with, write a letter to the editor. Next time you see an advertisement that you don’t like, then chances are that it wasn’t targeted at you, so ignore it. ‘The tobacco industry has a right to advertise and you have a right not to read it. Let’s try to respect each other’s rights. If anyone has a problem with what I wrote, then e-mail me at jpeeters@undergrad.math. I’d be happy to discuss it further. -Jeff Peeters 3N Math/Bus



To the Editor, l have been waiting a long time to write this letter and never really had a platform until the recent controversy with the tobacco advertisements. Recently, “The Rambler” stated in the March 1 edition of the

Ooh, touchy issues this week. 1 .Sex.Wavingconsciouslyand deiiberatefy chosen the chaste lifestyle I currently lead, I may not be much of an authority, however, I still want to comment on a couple of things I’ve read in the papers lately. The Vatican recently published a buck on sex educatian. Accor& ing to this book, safe sex is “a dangerous and immoral policy.” What &e is immoral? Abortion, contraception and masturbation! You’ve got to love the gafl af an iastitution run by 3 bunch of old

Imprint that the tobacco industry is “one of the most insidious and loathsome industries around.” Well guess what. 3 I live on a tobacco farm. Tobacco (arming has been the main staple of my family’s income since 1937. The area in Southern Ontario that I am from is the tobacco capital of Ontario. Tobacco is our culture and heritage. Delhi, Ontario is home of the Ontario Tobacco Museum. Just about all my friends from home live on a tobacco farm or have worked in tobacco. If it had not been for these jobs, the University of Waterloo and several other universities and colleges in Ontario would never have seen our tuition money and we would never see a degree. A recent study produced by Deloitte and Touche indicated that tobacco production, marketing and leaf processing provides over 453 million dollars in income to Ontario, over 9,000 full-time equivulent direct and indirect jobs and generates 157 million dollars in tax revenues to all levels of government. The study states that the industry is an important one and that any decline would not only negatively affect farmers but local business, services, and municipal governments for the areas supported

sexually active on a regular basis, but I’m not sure that it follows that they were exactly open to a rnessage of chastity. lf I recall correctly, most of them weren’t having sex not because they were pondering the negative ramifications ofa loss ofinnocence, it was mostly

becausetheyjust couldn’t find anyone willing

to have it with them6

2.Eathanasia. Ifarutingbya federal appeals court. holds up, you can expect the US. to effectively legalize euthanasia. The % U.S. Circuit Court of

men who have (suppos&Iy) never

Appeals rwentiy mted &at a Was&

had sex, telling hundreds of miflions af people what is right and wrong as f$r as sex is concerned, an

ington state law making

institutitin Ehatis run by a guy wha refuses to even discuss women’s rights within the church on the ~~~ndsthatmerr ~vebeenchosen by God as sup&r to women! For aII those of you sinners who don?

think this way, 1 remind you of John Paul IX’s justification for this claim; afl of the 12 disciptes men? Case closed.


I’ve also never mastwbakd, but 1 still question the Vatican calling masturbation a “grave disorder,” that is characteristic of immaturity, and which can be in no way moraI1y justified. I knew this guy who hada fiend who once masturbated, and he said it wasn’t redly

it a crimi-

nal actfor a doctor to assista twminally iti patient end their 1% viatated the 14th amendment to the con&h&on. guarantees

The 14t.b arnendmeat the right to liberty.

Ofcome, therearecanditiarrs. The terminally ill pabt seeking help ending their life must be men-

tally compeknt, and their motivation to end their life must be that doing so will let them avoid protracted pain and suffering. I agree with the first condition, but not the second. I shouldn’t need to justify to anyone why I want; to die- How* ever, I d&t think that this is much of a problem, Presumably, a sane person who isn’t suffering wiff not want to die. In fact, this is probably true by d&Man.

that tetibIe* The secondtiing 1xad wan a Letter ta the Editor in the G&e and Miil, written by ti mm who

Personally, I’m all for euth8nasia. As Schpmhauer SO aptly put it, “it is obvious there is nuthingin the. ww2d & man has, a more

runs the “Family-life educ+tion”. props Fgra C&ho&e school board.



right to &ti his owa And &.w& if something be*

in NepW, Cd. He say6“anly 207$ hgs to you, you can da wih it g of ali [high s&oul] studenti are .,jw please. And as for geting a sexually active una regular basis;St dac@r’to help you end yaur life? If thei are tillin& why shotild it b a fidi S@% are naE rqy&+ sewwIly active Md are quite opex3to a mes- problgzi? Xtis sitipljl an awang isageofchasti$’ Iknew smnepeo- ,mtnt 2Wween two cowe&tia$ pie in high

schcrol who




Friday, March 15,1996

by tobacco. The study concludes by saying that in the period of 19X I to I987 when the industry felt significant decline, there was an increase in family problems, an increased. rate of stress-related problems and outmigration from tobacco-belt communities which affected the social well-being of the area. It is everyone’s right to shoot off their mouth about tobacco and. smoking, but the issues go deeper. We are real people trying to make a living. Tobacco is the basis of our livelihoods. Growing tobacco is. basically all we know. Southern Ontario is the ideal place to grow this crop with its low lying sandy soil. You don’t know how many times that I’ve heard someone say, “Oh just get them to grow something different.” It’s not that simple. My dad and other farmers have tried alternate crops such as peanuts and sweet potatoes, but there just isn’t the market for it; there is for tobacco. When the general public make statements about this industry, slamming the big companies, 1 think they are forgetting that the companies are just doing their job, promoting a legal product. Don’t you think that we know tobacco and smoking kills, causes lung cancer, and has other deadly effects? (I3y the way, no one in my family smokes.) It’s not like we get up every moiming, are happy and yell, “Yeah, today we kill thousands more!” My dad and other farmers would gladly grow somcthing else, provided that capital investment was low, it would @u them the same income (or hopcfully higher). and a market tilt- it would be guaranteed. ‘The point that 1 am trying to convey is that when students at this university and the global population state their dislike for tobacco, do they realize that tobacco is sustaining regular people like my family. Tobacco is a thriving marketplace. Canadians know that smoking is bad, but as long as people make the choice to smoke we will continue to provide the cigarettes. In response to the issue should the university run these tobacco ads, I say yes! Hell, if UW is going to get $2,000 for it why not? The government doesn’t hesitate to accept money fi-om cigarette taxes. why should UW hesitate to accept $2,000 for an. ad? As long as cigarettes are a legal product and Canadians are going to use it, Canadians might as well reap the monetary benefits from growing it and the related industries. Further, if the government is looking to save money, they might look to cutting back some of these anti-smoking advertisements. They are nothing more than entertainment cspeciall> for the teens that they are aimed at. Tobacco money pays my bills! -Lyn

Anne Addknn


weed #5

To the Editor, I’m on work term right now, but keep up with what’s happening at UW via Imprint’s web page. The great thing about most web pages, Imprint’s included, is that Continued

to page 15




page 14

there is no commercial advertising getting in the way of the text. But the paper version of Imprint is apparantly running tobacco ads, and this seems to have upset some people. It is interesting that two of the anti-ad letter writers of last week actually mentioned the name of the tobacco company that placed the ad (something the editor managed to avoid in “The Rambler,” consciously or not). That’s the first time I’ve seen a cigarette brand name in print in-.-well, a long time. From what little I understand about advertising, brand name repetition imperceptibly alters market share when it comes to mass-consumed products like tobacco or soft drinks. It simply encourages consumers to consume more of the product. So it would seem those letter writers have actually helped the advertiser’s cause.



Voice the

from past

To the Editor, I am very pleased to see that Imprint is not only still in business, but still a first class publication amongst the Canadian University Press. I was the founding editor of Imprint in 1978, and I was pleasantly surprised to come across your Web version (Vol. 18 - am I really that old? -- No. 30) while surfing the ‘net. I founded Imprint with several comrades to provide an intelligent, objective alternative to the Cttevron - a dogmatic publication that was the “official” newspaper at the time. The Imprint is the “official” newspaper today because, after six months of shoe-string publication out of classrooms, we won a student referendum to take the Chevron’s status, office space, and student funding. The Imprint won because it was a better product objective, informative, stimulating. I sense it still is today. Keep the spirit the paper was founded on serious news, and a forum for all viewpoints. -Nick Redding Editur, Imprint Vu& I; presenlly living in Anaheim, Culijbrnia

The Campus Exr,erience TO the Ed&w, Perhaps theImprint should be named the “Campus Experience,” for that is how I think of it. Newspaper is a term loosely applied to words typeset on off-white paper. The Imprint is a weekly journey through the insane aspects of university life, with more ups and downs than the “Minebuster”roller coaster at Paramount Canada’s Wonderland. The front page itself is normally an arts student’s attempt at humour mixed with irony. (Keep



Friday, March 15,1996


trying, you’ll get it right eventually.) It doesn’t matter though, because I flip right to the next page and scan the spellbinding Imprint News. That’s not really what I’m most interested in, but it is the first thing you read, so the Imprint staff must think it’s juicy. So, onward I plod through the news about campus, stopping randomly to read the first and last lines of an article to find the main point without having all that middle part getting in the way. The ads are cool. They promise me happiness and good times if 1 bring a thick wallet or my VISA card. I read the campus question to see if I recognize anyone. Then I tease them about it. The letters to the editor (including this one) are really only melodramatic cries for attention with an overdose of vulgarity, and “The Parking Lot is Full” is the same thing with more pictures and fewer words (for us engineers who don’t like reading). The Imprint’s spell checker seems to be malhnctioning, because it didn’t catch the word ‘women’ spelled as ‘womyn’ in a recent issue. I’ve never found out who John Galt is. I skip the sports section because it’s filled with people in better shape than me. In the arts section, people with odd hair tell me which movies I should see and try to explain to me the intricacies of 90’s rock. But still, Friday is Imprint day. I always grab a copy or steal a copy from my friend aen he’s not looking. That’s because the Imprint is an important part of our lives and I think we would miss it if it were gone. So, to the Imprint staff, keep up the hard work. To Pete Nesbitt, Pat Spacek, James Russell, Patrick Wilkins, and all the rest of the writers, keep writing! Finally, to all of the readers, make sure you pick up your own copy of Imprint and enjoy it. But remember the Imprint is not a newspaper. It is much more important than that. It is the soul of the campus.

moved to distance themselves. Several student councils have made donations to help repair the damage. Perhaps the most telling reaction was that of Education Minister John Snobelen, who said of the protest that “probably in the public eye it hurts the student cause,” but added, “It doesn’t in my eye. I recognize that’s a pretty small group relative to the number of students in Ontario.% short, Snobelen sug-

gests the protesters were unrepresentative. Governments often dismiss their critics as unrepresentative. But we can see how completely the protest backfired, in the fact that the government could not only dismiss the protesters - but could sound generous in doing so. The Ontario Undergraduate Student Alliance @USA) is wary of mass rallies. We didn’t take part in this one, for reasons that should

now be quite clear. A large rally is difficult to control. Unless it is well organized, it will tend to lose focus, and thereby send a different message than its leaders had in mind. The point of most rallies is to win the support of the general public, but many people associate them with narrow “fringe” groups. A rally is best at sending a simple Continued

to page 16








-Scott Whitluck IB Computer Engineering

Fiasco distraction


To the Editor, On February 7, some 2000 students took part in a demonstration at Queen’s Park organized by the Canadian Federation of Students (CFS). Things got ugly when a small group broke through police barricades, smashed the doors of the building, and conducted a sitin. Several people were injured, and about 20,000 worth of damage was done. Four students face criminal charges, which could lead to prison terms ofup to fourteen years. The incident has ignited a longsimmering debate about the tactics ofprotesters and the nature ofdemocratic dissent. This fiasco has done nothing to advance the students’ cause. Public response to the violence has been overwhelming negative, and a number of student leaders have




University Shops Plaza 170 University Ave. W. Owned

and qxrated

by the Cardian


rd Students

03. Reg.



16 Continued


page 15


one that fits on a placard; is not an argument, and the issues facing students are as complex as they are important. The melee at Queen’s Park should be seen for what it was: a distraction form the real issues. The Harris Government has cut fUnding for universities by $400 million. Our schools now receive less money per student than those in any other province; they get just over half as much funding as public universities in the U.S. At the same time, the government has raised tuition by another 20%. Coupled with cuts in government grants, this means that Ontario students now pay a higher share of the cost of education- than in almost any

but a slogan

other part of the industrial world. And the Government’s election plan to reform student aid has so far gone nowhere. As a result of this, Ontario universities have recorded a si&mificant drop in applications, at a time when almost half of all new jobs will require post-secondary study. The irony is that all of this is defended as being good for the economy -- though economists agree that higher education is an essential public investment. The rally at Queen’s Park might have been used to raise these issues, but the violent tactics of a few demonstrators became the main story. The many students who came for a peacetil demonstration -- to speak of real and important issues -- had their message drowned out by the sound of breaking glass. As

open letter to students faculty of Environmental An

for those who became caught up in the vandalism: they deserved better leadership. Two of those charged are still in high school. The court should be satisfied with giving them a lecture on democratic dissent -- the message they should have heard from CFS before things got out of hand. The role of the media is also an issue. A violent demonstration is, if nothing else, a great way to get media attention. The attention is likely to be negative, and any sensible lobbyist knows there is nothing to gain from this. But reporters should play a key role in allowing informed debate of important public issues. Those who make it clear they’d rather cover a good brawl do nothing to promote constructive debate, or sound public policy.

in the


IMPRINT, Friday, March 15,1996 The university cannot


system we have continue



current levels of funding. Many qualified students cannot possibly attend, while tuition fees reach heights the student aid plan was never meant to support. The government will soon announce a commission on universities, with a mandate to effectively redesign the system. This is no time for any of us to be distracted by sideshows. We need a serious, informed, and rational discussion, on how to protect the quality and accessibility of higher education in Ontario. It is vital that students play and active role in this debate - and also that the students’ message is heard.

--Jason -Dick Senior

Martin Policy Advisor,


StatsCan apolitical To the Editor,

The Faculty of Environmental Studies faces some difficult challenges in the months ahead, but I feel confident that we will meet them. The Vice-President, Academic & Provost asked each of the Faculties to plan for a definate 7% budget cut for May 1, plus a probable 4% cut for 1997-8. These cuts amount to $52 1,100 on May 1, and $276,900 in 1997. The Special Early Retirement Program plus two other vacant faculty positions in ES, accounts for the following impending vacancies in the FES regular faculty complement: Architecture 1 (.05%), Environment and Resource Studies 5 (45%), Geography 4 ( 17%), Urban and Regional Planning 4 (24%) and FES in total 15 (21%). FES is not required to cut all of the early retirement positions, but must cut all of the required dollars. Each returned faculty position is worth about $69,000 towards a budget cut, however, and it is difficult to find such a large amount of money from other sources, as most of the ES budget goes to salaries of permanent professors and staff members. FES administrators realized as soon as the results of the SERP were known that we faced an unusual challenge due to the uneven distribution of the retirements and the significant potential impact on ERS, a department of 11 faculty. In any equitable plan of downsizing, the School of Architecture would face other challenges, in having so few open positions to return. At the same time, FES faces increasing student demand for computer-assisted instruciion, facilities, and applied environmental courses in order to meet their course requirements and prospective job markets, The group of ES administrators have tried to respond to these challenges by determining how we might meet future cuts even deeper than those predicted, by finding ways to improve our efficiency, and by comparing current trends in our disciplines. Environmental Studies students should feel reassured that their programs are all intended to continue. ERS is a strong, attractive undergraduate program and we would be foolish to let it wither. With the budget cuts that are forecasted, we foresee no department or program closures, and each of the schools and departments is carefully planning its curricula for next year and beyond. ES students may see fewer offerings of low-enrollment classes, more flexible course requirements for graduation, and more cross-disciplinary teaching as these plans evolve. We deeply regret the three ES technical staff layoffs that recently occurred due to our budget cuts. Two staff members were in the Cartography Centre, and one was in the Environmental Media Information Centre (EMIC). Although this decision caused considerable distress within the Faculty and we are all concerned about the well-being of the individuals involved, I remain convinced that the redundancics were necessary, given the mission of an academic Faculty and cuts of this magnitude. Student services in these areas will continue. Remaining Cartography and EMK staff will be joining forces with the Mapping, Analysis, and Design group (MAD). We will also advertise for one new MAD staff position in computer assisted design (CAD) and-general student support, funded through two previously vacated office staff positions. The rest of the 7% cut will be accommodated through the return of vacant retirement positions. In the future we foresee: returning additional retirement positions, transferring support for Architecture’s Rome Program from hard dollars to external donations; and moderate cuts to departmental operating budgets (fewer undergrad T. As, less adjunct or sessional instruction, fewer postage stamps, and the like.) With even the Faculty’s worst-case cut scenario, we believe that we can hire a few new permanent faculty members. Advertisements for two positions in ERS have just gone out. If the cuts are no worse than 4% in 1997-8, we can probably hire a few more faculty on lines that were not cut. We continue to look for ways to take advantage of FES’s interdisciplinary approach. For example, Urban & Regional Planning’s loss of its retired design professors will be addressed through reallocation of teaching from the School of Architecture. We also hope to improve communication to ES students about matters of mutual interest. MAD staff are currently developing an electronic mailing list so that any ES student with an e-mail address can receive many of the informational memos that currently go out to ES faculty and staff. The Faculty of Environmental Studies welcomes student advice on these important decisions. Comments or questions about your degree programs and course offerings might be best directed to your Chair/Director or gradundergrad officer or staff advisor. To comment on FES instructional labs and equipment, contact the Associate Dean for computing (Brent Hall, SURP) or Associate Dean undergraduate (Greg Michalenko, ERS) Bob Gibson (ERS) chairs an open-membership group of faculty, staff, and students interested in innovative curriculum development for FES’s future. I’m available to consult with students as well, and can be contacted at x2884 or j kay@watserv i .uwaterloo,ca. The Faculty of Environmental Studies fills a unique and important role in Canadian higher education. Not the least of the reasons is our talented student population. We will do what we MI to ensure a level of education that matches your needs and commitment to your programs. -Jeanne Kay Dean, Faculty

uf Envirmmental


agenda. (By the way, they’re ALL MEN. Get the picture’?) Many people have been critical of some of the analysis published by the department on the subjects of unpaid work and violence against women. Rather than scrutinize the research and the supporting data, commentators have generally slung mud at the department, which is the case here. It’s so easy to be an armchair critic! I am proud to work for Statistics Canada. It isn’t a perfect organization, but the integrity of the department is solid and well-earned. If I didn’t feel this way I would have left long ago.

It had been several years since I sat in the Campus Centre (aka the Student Life Centre), bought a coffee at the Turnkey Desk and read Imprint. On March 9th, I did just that. This maudlin trip down memory lane - I was in town for the 25th anniversary celebration for GLLOW - was interrupted by an ill-informed letter in the Forum section. While I was attending UW, many homophobic rants appeared in Imprint in response to the column “A Different Light,” which often prompted my friends and me to write letters to the editor. Now, it is my workplace and colleagues that are being maligned. I was compelled again to write. I dispute several of Wendy Woodhall’s “facts” about StatsCan (“No census consensus,” March 8,1996) which were published in response to Pat Merlihan’s column in the February 9th edition. I have not read the original, but I infer from Wendy’s comments that Pat also definitely doesn’t have the story right. The debate surrounding the collection of data on unpaid labour, I feel, rightly identifies the political nature of scholarship. Deciding what is important to study and what is not, is inherently a political statement. In particular, the invisibility of unpaid labour in government databases worldwide has political implications, especially for women. The best support for this viewpoint known to me is presented by Barbara Waring in IJ’ Women Counted. Both Wendy and Pat seem to agree that StatsCan is a political organization. Not true. The department has an arms-length relationship with the government and by and large sets its own agenda. The integrity of the department, which is recognized internationally, depends upon the absence of any political interference. Never in my years here have I ever smelled even a whiff of parliamentary influence. It is unthinkable. Furthermore, StatsCan is not a wing of the National Action Committee for the Status of Women. The Chief Statistician, and all of the Assistant Chief Statisticians, are not known in Ottawa as a group of radical feminists. Though some may be self-proclaimed feminists, I doubt if manipulating statistics to propagate feminism is on their


War on Quebec! To the Editor, Since his inauguration I have read much critism and debate over Mike Harris’ “draconian” policies and politics. Intelligent debate is what I look forward to reading in newspapers 1ik.e Imprint. But what I found in Vilko Zbogar’s article “The More Things Change...” was Pap. If there is anything we can extrapolate from Vilko Zbogar’s analogy between Mike .Harris and Adolph Hitler this is what it will be: Ontario will be declaring war on Quebec within 3 years, the rest of Canada the following year, and after that, world domination ifwe’re feeling up to it. Unfortunately there is one small problem with this plan; contrary to what Zbogar writes, Harris doesn’t really have the “massive public support” that Adolph Hitler did; he’s actually rather despised by the majority ofontarions, and if trends continue in the simplistic way that Zbogar sees them, Harris will be ousted even before he has a chance to plant our flag in Quebec. -iVeil

C. Hepburn



To the Editor, I have a few comments with regards to “Mare facts from SAC,” {Imprint, March 8). First of all, let me say that Chris Law’s article opened my eyes (as well as many others) to the real story behind the “one and only” Co-opprogram. Personally, I’m sick and tired of hearing all the excuses by the Co-op Departrnent for the low percentage of matched students in my Faculty (AHS j, which is currently 35%. Of the 35%, I would suspect it includes people who found their own jobs or are only returning because there isn’t anything else worth applying to. I’m no math graduate from Brock, but I believe that still leaves 2/3 of our faculty unemployed. INow, let’s see: $411 for the co-op fee times 130 unemployed students = $53,430. This can only mean one thing. A bet exists between Co-op and Food Ctmtinued

to page 17



Friday, March 15,1996


as to who can scam the

lacking. ASU meetings are a complete joke, although the ASU now appears to be trying to clean up its

student body worse, and it looks

act. Another issue is the seeming

like Co-op has a slim lead. Any questions yet? I also have a problem with the quality of the current jobs being posted. Example: Bingemen Park Picnic Co-ordinator - I’m fucking serious! Just imagine the interview: Than: So what kind of picnic pxperience do you have? Me: rfold napkins real pretty! Them: Superb! The job is yours! l’ve been fed the lines by numerous co-ordinators about the invaluable experience one gains as a co-op student. I’m sorry but finding me the position of gatekeeper at African Lion Safari doesn’t cut it for $400. What does the fee really pay for? Certainly not prompt administrative service. . . “I’m sorry, the ranking forms aren’t ready, could you come back later?” Remember, kids? I appreciate the SAC for their efforts, but I don’t think things will change until students begin dropping out of co-op - then the coordinators will really have nothing to do. If anyone out there has ideas for improving the situation, let’s hear it. After all, I’ve spent $1200 in fees and it has found me one job. Now I’m no Western business student but 1 don’t think I’m getting my money’s worth. 1 would finally like to mention that the retirement of Brock fuller was the best thing to happen to AHS Co-op. I’d personally like to tell him that but he would probably just nod his head and say, “Is it the best thing? I don’t know-maybe you should check with Co-op services. . Y

disregard of the ASU for the societies which make up Arts Council. As well, the large expenditure of funds by the ASU without the knowledge of or voting by Arts Council goes unchecked. Alone, each of these is cause for concern; in combination, they represent a critical breach of the responsibility with which the ASU has been entrusted by all Arts students. On behalf of the PSSA, I would like to publicly extend to the ASU an offer of assistance in any of the above areas. I also congratulate the ASU on attempting to right its wrongs in the face of adversity.



page 16

-hen t Fraser 3A Hunours Unemployed

PSSA can help ASU To the Editor, 1 wish to address the issues which have arisen regarding the Arts Student Union. The aim of the allegations made by the PSSA was never to slander or defame the character of any members of the ASU. I would like to personally apologize to any ASU members who feel that they were in some way slighted. Instead, the goal of the PSSA was and is to look into the financial state of the ASU, something which was denied until this week’s meeting. The PSSA is also interested in the accountability of the ASU, the student body representing the largest Faculty on campus. The Arts Council, made up of representatives of all full-time students cucrently registered in the Faculty of Arts, *‘has the right to any and all information of interest to the ASU.” (ARTICLE VI, B:6). As members of the Council, the PSSA was merely exercising this right. There are some other serious problems within the ASU which need to be addressed; many of these have existed for some time. One of these areas is the blatant ignorance of the ASU of their own constitution. In addition, the constitution as it presently exists is severely

-Joanna Prestient,

Werden PSSA

Prez-elect likes ASU To the Ed&r, The Arts Student Union held their emergency Council meeting Tuesday, March 12,1996 at 4:30pm after a busy day of helping with Campus Day. All active societies were present as well as several interested Arts students. Arts councillors were present, as well as Xander LeRoy, Trish Mumby and Mario Bellabarba, however Mike Suska was absent. A formalized budget was brought forward by Josh Windsor, current President of the ASU and Mike Lippert (appointed Treasurer by Council January 18). The budget presented the expenses for the term as well as the income from the $7.00 collected from each undergraduate student which was paid in two instalments. The first instalment equalled $10,273.20, while the second was $6,848.80 for a grand total of $17,122.00. As of now, that budget is working at a deficit. Lippert and Windsor also prepared a sample budget if the allotments were raised to $3.50 per student in each major from $2.50 as the Political Science Student Association proposes to do. By raising the allotments it would seem that the ASU would no longer be able to provide loans and grants to the societies. It would also probably have to cut the Sphere (the Arts newspaper), the Arts Spring Formal and any help we provide for events like Transitions ‘96, a day of sessions for graduating Arts students. The small societies that receive a minimum allotment of $125 per term would not benefit from the proposed hike, and would in fact suffer, If there was enough money for grants and loans, it would be limited, and the larger societies benefiting from a larger allotment would still be eligible for those same grants and loans. The PSSA claimed that they could provide more services for their students with the extra money. However, when asked what they listed such things as: sending students to conferences like the UN model (for which they used a $200 grant from the ASU) and subsidizing T-shirts for the students. Mike Haltrect from the Theatre Students Union jokingly suggested raising the allotment to $6.50 per student so that he could

supply all Drama students with Tshirts. The logic behind PSSA proposing the hike seemed to be punishment for the way ASU has run Council and its monies in the past two terms. For example, one of the accusations from the PSSA was that the ASU spent money on computer games, which happened to be donated by Bill McCraig. Josh Windsor took full responsibility for all the problems, which mainly stemmed with the lack of work by resigned Treasurer Matt Main. Unfortunately due to the problems with the Treasurer, a budget was unable to be passed sooner than Tuesday’s meeting. Normally, the Council acts as a “watchdog” over the way the money is spent by the ASU when the budget is presented at the beginning of term, If the ASU is used simply as a bank through which money is simply distributed to the societies, and the societies handle more money, who watches over them to be sure that the money is being distributed in the best interests of the students? There were also several complaints regarding the way the Constitution has been interpreted and the Constitution itself. Xander LeRoy suggested a committee for amendments to the Constitution. Next year’s ASU Exec (four of whom currently hold positions) have already discussed this option. Next’s year’s Vice-President, Mike Lavigne and myself as next year’s President took note of Tuesday’s complaints and suggestions, Now, it’s rather late in the term to be complaining and making changes. However, those with any further ideas were encouraged to come forward. The Exec view the bad PR as a positive experience. In the past, Arts students have had a reputation of not getting involved and not caring. Council meetings have generally poorly attended and there has been little to debate. Many students claim they don’t know that the ASU exists, or what services the ASU provides. Not only does the ASU hold one of the best Orientation Weeks on campus, they helped with The Great Debate and Transitions ‘96 with the Arts Alumni, the Secondary School Liaison Program and Campus Day with the Arts Undergraduate Office’ and they run coffee shops in both Hagey Hall and Psychology. -Judi McCulloch, ASU president-elect

In yer To


the Editor,

What a “nice” letter (as excerpted in the UW Gazette, March 6) the Federation of Students and the Graduate Student Association sent to Terence Young, Parliamentary Assistant to John Snobelen, Minister of (his version of) Education. Perhaps Snobelen is simply simple and needs things spelled out - both literally and figuratively. We, the undersigned, however, are scornful of such a “nice” approach to such a government. Everything said in the letter about BIUs and PSEs has been available to that neo-conservative crew for some time. It, nonetheless, proceeds re. education the way it did with the

17 omnibus bill - stupidly and belligerently . It seems to us that getting in the face of a government that has (c)rudely gotten in our faces is a highly appropriate, not to mention necessary, step. We, therefore, announce the formation of the UW “Direct Action Committee” to plan “events” and co-ordinate activities in opposition to the Harris govemmerit. We meet every Wednesday from 4:3&-6:00 p.m. at the Grad House and welcome all those - students, faculty, staff, people in the community - who wish to join us.

ple, willing to help each other with anything you might need. I encourage all students, regardless of their

perceived abilities, to think about pursuing athletics during their stay at Waterloo. Keep fit and have fun and see you in 96-97. -Rob Giesen 3A Systems Design


We have winner!


To the Editor, -Stanley Fogel Ifaculty, SK’) Paul S&ewe (grad, English) J. Waterhouse (student, SJC) Mutt Chaput (student) Amber Wallace (student) Muryanne Pearce (Anthropolugy and Womens’ Studies student)

Green Leaf response

Hi there, I was at the Warriors games on Sunday evening. I was disappointed to see them lose, but did you know that the winner of the car was a student from the University of Waterloo? I think it is only appropriate that you mention Craig Hamilton’s name for being the I ucky winner! ! ! ! ! ! I think you guys do an awesome job with the Imprint. Keep up the good work.

To the Editor,


Wayne Prior’s article in the March 1, 1996 edition of Imprint suggested that WPIRG was somehow at fault for not leading a workshop at the LEARN Conference of February 24, 1946. WPIRG never officially confirmed that they would be able to hold a workshop at this conference. The Green Leaf Committee of Waterloo was aware in advance of the conference that WPIRG would be unable to attend. The Green Leaf Committee greatly appreciates the coverage of the LEARN Conference provided by the Imprint. We look forward to working with you at future events. -Catherine Fitzgerald Green Leaf Committee

On the right track


Mutant word To the Editor, Womyn, that mutant word which has been plastered over Imprint these past couple of weeks, does not liberate me. In fact it toys with the happy assumption I’ve harboured throughout my life that, as a woman, I am equal to, and independent of men; no incentives are needed. The use of womyn presents the concept that only by dissociating themselves from men on every trivial level can women stand as complete, free entities. Indeed the sight of the word womyn makes me feel like I’ve been struck by a serious ailment. Good lord, I feel a bad case of womynhoodcoming on. -Nancy


To the Editor, The Waterloo Track and Field season is over for 199596. For myself, it was my first year on the team, and an exciting year at that. Being on the track team took me to sue h exotic locations as San Diego, Los Angeles, The University of Cornell, Notre Dame and Windsor. I have competed beside some of the best university athletes in Canada, and had a great time doing it. I would just like to thank all our coaches and trainers who did an excellent job, and treated all of us like world class athletes. The team consisted of a great bunch of peo-

Radical feminism To the Editor, Dear Sandy Atwal: What is Radical --Shirley-Ann Co-ordinutor, UW Women’s



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Things that go Bump in the Night: The straight goods on viruses by Timothy Dyck special to Imprint


utting the final staple into an assignment. Opening the re fiigerator door and discovering that somebody else went out and bought milk. Having a computer that always works. Sleep. These are things that everyone hopes will happen to them someday. On the other hand, there are some things that you just hope will never happen to you: being audited by Revenue Canada, being in an airplane crash, or getting a computer virus. The first two arc very unlikely - Revenue Canada audits about 1% of returns and plane crashes are in the fractions of a percent, far lower than the risk of getting hurt while driving to the neighborhoodstore. But what about viruses? The way some people talk about viruses, you might think they act like the Black Spy in MAD magazine, creeping onto your computer in the dead of night, turning your files into electronic confetti, and then giving you a call from your own modem to celebrate. I had a call two weeks ago from a friend who had a virus on her computer. A virus infection had been confirmed and she was in a panic. Her computer wouldn’t start. She couldn’t get her data files off her hard drive. Nothing was working. It’s the kind ofevent that gives all of us nightmares, particularly if we haven’t backed up our data recently (or at all!) Viruses are real and they can cause you to lose programs or data files, though it’s more likely that you will just not be able to use your computer normally until the problem is fixed. Like any other risk, the way to deal with viruses is to know your level of vulnerability, understand some basic steps to deal with the problem if it ever arises, and then stop worrying about it. THE



The straight goods about computer viruses is that they aren’t a big risk. If you aren’t trying to live dangerously, the chances ofgetting a real virus are small, especially compared with the chances of you accidentally destroying your own data or a software glitch causing your computer to act strangely. The reason viruses are mentioned so often in the media is simply that they make for great stories. Conversations about viruses between knowledgeable users are full of colorful terms like “Trojan Horse,” “Stealth Technology,” and “Friday the 13th.” However, viruses very quickly stop being just interesting curiosi ties when you think you might be facing one of them up close.

Here are the facts. A virus is a small computer program designed to get on your computer and run there without your knowledge or consent. All viruses have two things in common: 1) they must make sure that they are run regularly by your computer without your realizing it and 2) they must be able to spread themselves to other computers.

your computer with an infected floppy disk in the drive. It’s very easy to forget that you left a data disk in your floppy drive from a previous computer session. I[n fact, becoming infected this way is so common that virus experts estimate that boot viruses infections account for 80% of all virus attacks. Watch out - this is a major area of risk!

tionall y distributing a virus with their software, Shrink-wrapped professional software (either shareware or commercial) comes with the same assurances. If you buy your system fiorn a reputable dealer and only get new software from a store or from professional organizations, you will probably never get a virus of any kind. Ifyourun software from hacker bulletin boards or try out a disk labeled “Misc. Games” from a friend, then you are making yourself more vulnerable. Providing software from untrustworthy sites with easy access to your computer is like leaving an address label attached to your front door key and then losing it. If you do it enough times, you will get eventually get burned. IT FINALLY

Insdin HOW

will TO

not GET




Naturally, most people would never deliberately start a virus program, so viruses have to get inusing sneaky tactics. You typically get a virus by running some software that has already been infected with a virus by another person. The virus actually changes the software on the disk so that when your computer thinks it is starting the legitimate software, it’s in fact the virus that is being run. The virus will then do its nasty business (most often to copy itself to another location on your computer, such as from a floppy disk onto your hard drive) and then start the real program you were intending to run. This small delay can only take a fraction of a second and is very easy to miss. Most viruses then continue to run in your computer until you turn off your system, steadily infecting all the programs and disks that you place in your floppy disk drive. The types of viruses described above are called program viruses; they infect the programs you have on your computer. Even less obvious are a second type of virus, the boot virus. These modify special software on your system that is run automatically when you first turn on your computer. Boot viruses are particularly dangerous because they will instantly transfer themselves onto your system if you try to start




To summarize, you get a program virus by choosing to run a legitimate program that is infected with a program virus. You get a boot virus by starting (or trying to start) your computer with an infected disk in its floppy disk drive. That’s it. Contrary to popular myth, you cannot get a virus by connecting your computer to a network or to the Internet, reading electronic mail (as suggested by the “Good Times” virus hoax), or exe hanging data files (which cannot be run by your computer) with a friend. The people who write viruses may be fiendishly clever but they aren’t magicians. MINIMIZING


The best way to minimize your risk of virus infection is to control how often you run programs or boot from disks that come from potentially unsafe sources. If your system was initially uninfected and you never use software or disks from any other person, you will never get a virus. Some people choose to do this but it’s not really necessary and makes computing not as much fun. Just play it smart. Jfyoudownload software from commercial web sites or commercial on-line services, the programs there will have been pre-tested for viruses. No company can afford the black eye that comes from uninten-


It just might happen. If your programs are suddenly taking longer to run than they used to, if mysterious files are appearing on your hard drive, if the light on your floppy drive goes on for no reason, if letters are falling down to the bottom of your screen, then you might have a virus. To quote a famous phrase: “Don’t panic!” Most viruses will not harm your data, at least not deliberately. In fact, out of the 5000 or so currently known viruses, only about 300 are in common circulation and only a few of these are virulently malicious. Most of these 300 viruses are boot viruses whose primary mission is just to replicate like crazy. At the same time, no sensible user wants to leave an out-of-control program loose on their computer systems. Here’s the emergency virus procedure. First, stop the spread of the virus. Don’t put any disks in your computer without setting the tab on the disk so the disk is writeprotected. Don’t give the disk or program that you suspect gave you the virus to anyone else. Let the source of your infection know that you received a virus from them because they are almost certainly infected as well. Use your computer as little as possible until you get a safe boot disk with an antivirus package on it. Modem anti-virus so&are will, in most cases, detect your virus immediately and offer to fix it for you if they can. If so, let the software remove the virus and then scan all the disks that may have been infected to clean them too. If the software doesn’t detect the virus, you most likely don’t have one. If you think you may have a rare, new strain (extremely unlikely in actual practice) or the anti-virus software can’t fix the prob-

lem, then you will need the help ofa computer-savvy friend to lend a hand (or at least provide a shoulder to cry on). PROTECTYOURSELF! Here are four will minimize you with tools infection if it

concrete steps that your risk and provide to deal with a virus does ever occur.

1. If your computer can do this, turn OFF the setting that causes it to try and start from any floppy disk in the drive. Most newer PCs can do this. Check around in your system setup screens or ask a friend. You almost never need to boot Corn a floppy anyway, and if you do, it’s easy to turn the feature back on again. Doing this will protect you inalmost all cases. If you cad disable this feature, remember that trying to boot from infected disks, even data disks, is the overwhelming #1 source of virus infection. Developing a habit of ejecting floppy disks from the drive before you restart your computer will pay off. 2. Set the tabs on your floppy disks to prevent programs from writing to them (tabs open for 3 l/2” disks and tabs covered for 5 l/4” disks’). This way if you loan a disk to a friend and they have a virus, the virus will not be able to infect your disk. The tab can easily be flipped back while needed and thlen returned to its safe position. 3. Create a “guaranteed clean” system boot disk to I~JZ if you ever do get a virus. Trust me, you will need a boot disk eventually anyway. 4. Get a good virus detection program and keep it updated every couple of months. Symantec, McAfee, and ThunderByte are examples of companies that produce high quality commercial antivirus software. There are excellent shareware and freeware alternatives as well. One of the best of these is F-PROT, a DOS-based antivirus package that is free to individuals for non-commercial use (i.e. students!). It is available on the Internet (try http:/ /, pick the search function, and search for word “F-PROT”). If you talke these basic steps and follow even semi-reasonable precautions, you won’t have anything to fear from viruses. That news won’t put milk back into your fridge but it may just allow you to sleep a bit better at night. Timothy Dyck is a 4th year Computer Science student. He is hoping that this article will he@ him to get more sleep.

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Another sold-outspeechby Svend... by Patti Imprint

Lenard staff


ederal r\Jew Democrat MP Svend Robinson ‘came out’ publicly in 1988, six months before he ran in his first federal election, and he still thinks of it as the “most liberating experience, both personally and politically, of my life.” Robinson addressed a crowd of 250 people at the Waterloo Inn, in celebration of the 25th anniversary of the Gay and Lesbian Liberation of Waterloo (GLLOW) on Saturday March 10. Last year, Robinson spoke to University of Waterloo students about the pros and cons of euthenasia. He described this year’s talk as more “uplifting” and focused primarily on the development of legislation for the rights of people who are discriminated against on the basis of sexual orientation. He began by discussing the roles of groups like GLLOW in this development, saying that such groups can serve to provide a safe haven for gays and lesbians facing the coming out process in a less than understanding heterosexual world.

He continued by discussing the positive and negative apsects of his own public coming out. He denied

to all homes in his his own feelings for a riding, entitled long time he says and “Sodomite Inva“married my high sion Plan for the school sweetheart when 1990s.” I was 20.” Even as he Even though it was campaigned for liberating, Robinson leader of the NDP, also described his coming out as very chalthe Alberta Report had the gall to publenging. His office was vandaiizedthesameclay lish an article entitled “Why Can’t a that he made his public Pansy Parliamenannouncement, and he tarian be Prime was toId countless times Minister?“. that he had committed Now that he political suicide by is a prominent pocoming out. litical figure, Even subsequent Robinson sees his to his I988 victory (his role as two-fold. He riding is in Burnaby, must continue to BritishColumbia), peofight legislation that ple had suggested that it was simply the result of discriminates on the basis of sexual orithe national NPD sweep. entation, and he must actively fight Robinson, however, proved that this stereotypes that continue to exist dewas not the case as he spite the progress was easily re-elected in of this legislation. the 1993 federal elecOn March 4 tion. In fact, he was one of two MP’s to be re1996, discriminaCLWhy do born again Christians come back as tion on the basis of elected. He feels that themselves?” sexual orientation he can now honestly claim that he has been was finally prohib“elected on the basis of what 1 can ited on a federal level. The “Little seat despite significant resistance bring to the community.” Sister’s Court Case” has been won during his electoral campaigns. For He succeeded in winning his prohibiting Canadian customs from example, leaflets were distributed

Progressive politics? 1. On March 4, 1996, Allan Rock, the Minister of Justice p~b~ic]y announced that discrimination on the b&s of sexual orientation is unacceptable. 2. Before 1969, homosexual sex was illegal. In 1969, homosexual sex w;fs legalized, providing &at both partners were 21. A prnviso was added, describing it as “grossty indecent.” 3. The distinction between heterosexual and homosexual sex was removt:d f‘rom the Crmadian Criminal Code in 1990, with a uniform cmsenl age ol’ 14. 4. The Canadi;in Armed Forces prohibited discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation in 1992. 5. As the Charter of Rights and Freedoms was being drafted, sexual orientation was deliberately not included in Section 15, the section that lists the basis on which discrimination is prohibited. 6. The United Nations included the prohibition of discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation in their Human Rights Declaration last year, despite objections from Tasmania. 7. A study conducted in 1994 by the American Academy &Pediatrics showed that in 269 reported cases of child abuse, the perpetrators were homosexual in only two of them, 8. Alberta does not prohibit discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation in its provincial human rights code. 9. Canada and South Africa are the only two countries that prohibit discrimination on the b&& of sexti orientation iti their Charter of Rights and Freedoms. 10. No UW faculty members were able to attend GLLOW’s 25th anniversary celebration on Saturday night. The only faculty member to offlrcially reLqnize GLLOW’s silver annivew was Greg Michalenko, Associate Dean of Environmental and Resource Studies.


his year, the Gay and Lesbian Liberation of Waterloo (GLLOW) is celebrating its 25th anniversary as the oldest such organization on a Carladian university campus. Although it operates front UW, it provides services to the Kitchener-Waterloo community as well. Since its origin in 147 1, over 2000 people have been members of this organization. Countless others have taken advantage of the tesources it offers. These resources include housing lists, a lending library, and information via e-mail. according to However, GLLOW student co-ordinator Sarah Nicol, the three key resources provided include a crisis phone-line, coming out discussion groups and social nights. On an average night, the phoneline will receive 20 calls, asking for information concerning basic issues such as the location of gay bars and more personal issues such as masturbation and AIDS. Nicol notes that the phone-line is very successful because it does not require a

face-to-face meeting, and can often serve as a first step in the coming out process. The social nights often attract more than 35 people, and Nicol describes these events as “providing a safe space where people can fee1 healthy and normal about their sexuality.” She compares the services of-fered by GLLOW to any university organization that provides services to minority groups, such as lhe loreign students’ organization. “We have all kinds of clubs at the university. If a student comes here from Hong Kong, he can go to the Hong Kong students’ group and meet people of the same culture, who speak the same language. In a sense, we are providing a service for students in our own particular language.” The role of GLLOW is essentially

to provide

a “safe-gathering

space,” according to Nicol. But it also serves an important role in creating awareness of issues such as discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation. She laughs at the suggestion that religious activists such as Roseanne Skoke are helpful to her cause, but then acknowledges that,


literature enDouglas, who was fired from the Canadian Armed Forces (CAF) because she was gay, has recently won her own court case. Her lover is currently employed by the CAF. Social ideology and attitudes seem to be changing slower than legislation, however, and Robinson indicates that some of his “strongest opposition has come from people who call themselves deeply religious. Even the Pope has condemned homosexual families as false and fictitious.” Robinson is quick to point out the hypocrisy of a doctrine that intends to include all, while at the same time promoting such bigotry. Roseanne Skoke, a religious activist from New GIascow, Nova Scotia, received her fair share of criticism as Robinson questioned her interpretation of Christianity and the hate that it is responsible for. He closed on a positive note, to a standing ovation, with an insightful quote by Margaret Mead. “Thoughtful and committed peapie,” she says, “can change the world.” It now seems extremely important to realize that all people have the ability to clhange the world, and that they can do so regardless of sexual orientation. tering from the US. Michelle


GLLOW by Sarah Nical and Patti Leaard Imprint staff



in her own way, she too provides a service. After all, fighting homophobia is difficult if people do not express these feelings. Skoke objects to homosexuality on religious grounds. She is particularly a~lamant in her beliers that society needs to return importance to the traditional familya family that does not include homosexual Vdmily members. Skoke serves to voice concerns that ma:y be echoed by others. GLLOW plays an important role in ensuring that Skakes’ ideals do not become the norm. Even the Federation ofstudents has recently recognized the importance of the services that GLLOW provides. In September 1995, after a four month ,probationary period, C~LLOW’sstatuschangedfromclub to service. It is now funded by the Feds and its members no longer have to pay to belong. In the next 25 years, GLLOW hopes to continue to strengthen its position within the community, and increase the number of services to its members. The GLLOW office phone number is 884-4569. The email address is gllow @ watserv 1. uwaterloo.


Friday, March I&l996



2 1.

in Collision with Farley Mowat

An interview by Tracy Huffman special to Imprint


t was an army of ants and a large bumble-bee that first interested Farley Mowat in the environment. He was only two or three years old at the time, but one particular event stands out in his mind. His mother was sitting under a tree reading a book and he was sitting in, what he remembers to be, a square wooden thing. An army of ants was marching in his direction when a bumble-bee spiralled down in front of him. It raised a wing and halted the millions ofants, who then turned and took another route. A professional storyteller, Mowat, 74, says he may have invented the whole story. “But that’s a memory. it is based on a real memory.” Whatever it was that happened that day in Trenton, Ontario, the army of ants and the bumble-bee led Mowat to build a relationship with the non-human world. One in which he has been actively involved in since he was a child. Mowat says hc doesn’t think The battle of saving the ducks ofhimselfas an environmentalist. led to a number of other environTaking an active involvement in the mental projects for Mowat. The environment isjust oneofthe things hc: does. But when asked how he feels about the condition ofthe environmerit, Mowat has plenty of things to say. “The environment is our womb,” Mowat says while sipping a cup of tea. “If we poison it, we poisbnourselves. If&tearitapai-t, we tear ourselves apart. The idea that man can live somehow separate from nature and only use nature for his own ends and not have to pay for it is madness.” Mowat says he believes everyone needs to be a working part of nature. For everything that humans take from nature, they have to give back. Otherwise, Mowat says, we will be rejected by nature as a bad species and 64 we will vanish. As a kid in Saskatoon,

Mowat fL-stbecame active in the environment by starting a group

he called


Beaver Club of Amateur

one which he is most proud of is the battle for thewolf, a battle which led to his book and movie, iVel)er Cry R’~lf: It was Mowat’s first big battle for an endangered species. Mowat says it is not known or believed by many that the wolf is an endangered species. “I had been furioui for ykars at the lies that were told about the wolveshow the wolfis always cast as the evil animal, blood-thirsty killer. And it isn’t,” Mowat says. So Mowat decided to work toward changing the image of the wolf and he says he thinks he can tegitimately claim that he had something to do with the change of the







mals in danger such as the whales and the seals. The project is the brainchild of Paul Watson, a man, Mowat says, he admires. Watson devotes all his time to Sea Shepherd, an organization supported entirely by donations. “He (Watson) doesn’t take a nickel out of‘ Sea Shepherd,“saysMowat “He cams what he gets by lectur-

The idea that man can %itsonhassailed the live somehow separate

from nature and only use nature for his own ends and not have to pay for it is madness?

Naturalists. The group detided to take on a project of fecdingtheducksinthewinter months. Many ducks suffered injuries during the hunting season and were not able to fly south for the winter. About two or three dozen ducks hung around a warm pond not far from his home growing hungrier and hungrier. So Mowat took it upon himselfto keep the ducks alive. To fund the project, Mowat began a magazine/newspaper called NutUr-c~lo~~e. “I was the editor, the owner, most ofthe writers, and the s;ksman,” Mowat says. With the money he made from the sales of the magazine/newspaper he bought reed from the t ocal feed store.“The priceforthisfunnylitllepaperwas a nick4 or a dime,” Mowat chuckIes, “You had a choice.”

wolfs image. Mowat appears sad when he says he had no success in saving the wolf. He says he becomes depressed when he tries to evaluate the things he has done in terms of success and failure. Most of his attempts to save animate creations have not succeeded, according to Mowa, ‘*but that is only because I couldn’t possibly succeed,” he explains. “As tong as human beings are on this planet in the present form, they are going to go on destroying it.” Currently, Mowat’s largest en-

vironmental project is Sea Shepherd, a project aimed at saving ani-

nets. 1; the process he has nearly been killed, and has spent time in jail. “I think he is one ofthe important Cana-

!~~;;;;~~e~a;;~;;~;; in this country.” Mowat says one of the reasons he supports Watson is because Watson is probably the only environmentalist who is actually doing something; he’s not j ust talking, or trying to manipulate the govemment. If Watson finds people hunting whales illegally, he sinks them. “That’s my idea of a real environmentalist,” says Mowat. So who is it that has had the greatest influence in Mowat’s life? Much to her surprise, it is his wife, Claire. When she questions him and tries to make him believe otherwise he responds,“You have been the longest, continuous influence in my life. And I think really, the


of our


most important. “It is not a question of inspiration,” Mowat says to his wife. “It’s a question of having a relationship which is supportive. Mutually supportive. Without that, life is tough.” According to Mowat, there is nothing better than a good, bonded relationship with someone. It is Mowat’s relationship with his wife that has given him the support to accomplish the many things that he


has as an environmentalist, an author, and a person. Mowat says he doesn’t care how he is remembered. But he does say, “I’d like to be thought of as someone who has tried to do something. Whether I’ve succeeded or not, I’ve tried.” It is hard to imagine that it all began with an army of ants and a bumble-bee. But it is a wonderful


ust because you’re leaving University behind doesn’t mean you should leave the truth behind. Now, with Imprint’s homepage, you can have instant access to all the news that matters. Thanks to our WW page, you can navigate the scyhertruth that is your University newspaper. Why
















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Mahone’s Concert a MountainBike! thelegendcontinues,.

The game...

The Axe falls by Ryan Imprint

“Pucks” staff



’ Thgiie



NO varsity’ : :, : .

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SQ saur, ‘T. Warrior huckey. coach Don McKee

he bubble burst Sunday night at Maple Leaf Gardens for the Waterloo Warriors. And boy, did it hurt. The Warriors, the Ontario hockey champions riding an unbelievable wave of twenty wins in their last twenty one games, finally met their match in the University Cup national championship against the Acadia Axemen, tilling 3-2 to the Wolfville, Nova Scotia-based outfit in front of an impressive crowd of 7,5 11 energetic fans. At least a good three-fifths, it should be noted, were rooting for the Black and Gold. Acadia, the national champions three years ago, utilised their experience tojump out to a quick 20 lead, shocking everyone, including the previously invincible Warriors. So unexpected, in fact, that the first two Axemen shots on goal found the desired mark. Paul Doherty slipped one through Joe Harris’ armpit only 1:43 into the game, and Wade Whitten (who is so old I remember, as a twelve year old, asking him for his autograph when he played in the Soo) biscuit-baked right in the oven (the goalmouth) to commence the Waterloo fans’ seat squirming exercises. Four minutes later, the shots on goal were 5-O Acadia, and it appeared as if the Warriors were skating in sand, and the puck resembled a hand grenade the way they threw it around. Nothing was clicking. However, little by little, the Warriors climbed back into the contest only to be continuously stymied by the big, slow Axemen def’ence and the heroics of the Eastern pipe-blocker, Trevor Amundrud. With twenty-three ticks left on the mammoth Leaf scoreboard, Warrior slickster Greg Esdale found himself alone on the hash marks with Amundrud at his mercy. Esdale deked the goalie, and wristed an ice-screamer at the yawning cage. Alas, Amundrud unbelievably flicked his paddle at the puck, munching up the sure biscuit befbre it got to the oven. In the second period, a sloppy affair, Acadia sat back and let the Warriors come at them. Waterloo failed to comply, and the two teams engaged in some disorganized ‘Red Kover’. The Warriors couldn’t capitalize on a brilliant opportunity when the Axemen lost their cooI, Sullivan


For Smith (9), Wynne (S), and Gilchrist (lo), even shaking hands with Dougie Gilmour on the Gardens ice couldn’t improve their moods. Waterloo fell to Acadia 3-2. losing two players to the sin bin. the second penalty coming when top scoring Acadian Jason Weaver gooned captain John Wynne on an icing call. Later, the blue-and-white inexplicably tallied the only marker of the period, a Chris Skoryna dribbler that fluttered through Harris’ pads and rolled slowly.. .agonizingly over the painted red line. Warrior fans muttered to themselves, “hey, we’re in trouble here.” With twenty minutes to go and a daunting three-spot staring them in the face, Waterloo knew the pressure had heatened. After a disallowed Acadia goal on a high stick, Warrior centre Mark Vaughan stepped into a laser beam that richocheted off the post with a mighty clang. The sound proved so loud and disturbing that many Acadia fans thought the noise wmasa fire alarm, and they left the building. The play merely underlined the


Winner for of the Year

Nominee Randy





For the 1996 Gregg Award

on the bus after Sunday”s’



Chambers WuterIt?o

obvious question, “so, do you think the Warriors are going to ever score?” One Warrior forward, a fellow with plenty of Memorial Cup experience under his belt, knew it was no time to panic, “We knew that once we scored, we’d take it to them,” observed second-year winger Matt St. Gerrnain. “They had buried their chances earlier. It was up to us.” The man did it himself. After destroying Skoryna with a beautiful body check, St. Germain grabbed the puck, and in his own words, “I lost it, bounced through the two defencemen, looked, saw the puck had went through one guy’s legs, shifted off him, and just let ‘er fly.” And fly it did. Top shelf. Red light on. Warriors go bananas, Three-one. Five minutes to play. We have a hockey game, again, folks. CfAU

First AH-Star AH-Canadian

Juhfi Wynne Witerluu


After the scoreboard displayed “Unbelievable Goal (it has since been seen on TSN’s Plays of the Week,” the Warriors were ready to go back to work, having had some crucial wind injected back into their sails. Waterloo pressed Acadia, who had the took ofan animal just about to be run over by an automobile. Matters didn’t get any brighter fix the Axers when, with two minutes to play and Joe Harris on the Warrior bench for an extra attacker, Peter Brearley skated around the Axemen goal and fired a shot into a fray in front of the net. The original shot was foiled by the now annoying Amundnud, but the aftereffect went right to Mark Cardiff, and the steady “Cards” played his hand right, batting in the disc to pull Waterloo within one. Three-two. At this point, the Gardens turnedintoaswirlingchaosol‘nervous hope. The Waterloo faithful, sensing the Comeback of the Century, urged their team to get the equalizer. The Acudia fans either sat on their hands or bit their nails, wondering hiow their team could actually blow the national title. On nation-wide television, too. The Warriors applied vicious pressure the linal minute, and Mike Chambers, the Waterloo workhorse who injured his ankle in the second period but still valiantly returned, fired a desperation shot with five seconds left...OVEK the net. The buzzer cut through the hearts ofthe Warrior players and faithful, who watched wistfully as the Axemen leaped over the bench, mobbed Amundrud, threw off their gloves, helmets, and wooden lances, and performed al’1 the other petty rituals champions have been accustomed to acting out when they win. The Warriors hugged Harris and pretty much stood at their blue line, waiting for the post game festivities. The Waterloo faithful applauded, not only their effort in this pressure-filled contest, but the entire season the Warriors had, once again letting the sporting world know that Waterloo can field admirable squads. The Globe and Mail may call UW “champion-challenged,” but they may never question the heart and pride dispIayed by the twenty men who represented this “think-tank”, twenty thousand strong. The students will remember the near miss of a national title, but we can still proclaim, “Hey, we have a hell of a hockey team.” We will remember these guys. For a long time. Game

MVPS for Waterloo

vs. Acad ia Mark Cardiff





15, 1996

The game before The game...

Dinos meet their ice age by Ryan


Imprint staff



t seemed as if a big hammer had hit them on the head. The Calgary Dinosaurs, champions of the Canadian West division of the ClAU, knew their game with the Waterloo Warriors would be tough. But this tough? Surely, not this tough. The Warriors, wearing their mean-look% black outfits and itching for a date with Acadia in Maple Leaf Gardens Sunday night, slayed the Dinos 5-2 in front of 3,000 partisan-Warrior faithful at Varsity Arena in Toronto. Mike Chambers got the ball roiling three minutes in on the power-play, when he broke free from a defender, found himself on a breakaway, deked the Calgary goaiie Dawkins, fanned on the shot, but the puck slid in anyway. Jeff Goldie continued the Warrior attack, potting a centering pass from Steve Smith on yet another power-play. Waterloo carried the play, not even allowing the Dinos to gain a shot from the slot. Going into the dressing room, things looked good for the Black and Gold. Calgary, well, things didn’t look too good for them. They were getting physicaliy punished, the Warriors were scoring beautiful, highlight film goals, and Joe Harris made a glove save that: screamed out, “Don’t even try. You might as well go back to your hotel and pull the covers over your head, and wish yourselves back West.” In the stands, the world famous basketball heads attended, locating their usual seats right be-

hind the opposition bench. Also entertaining the spectators were members of the Warrior football club, vocally supporting their iceskating cousins, and spelling out ‘Go Warriors’ on their chests. Definitely, a good time was had by all. In the second frame, Greg Esdale scored to up the Waterloo lead to 3-O. Calgary looked bewildered. Warrior rearguard Brian Henry resembled a Patriot missile, slamming dangerously into various random Dinosaurs. Henry delivered at Ieast seven solid body checks, the gem of the group coming when Henry destroyed Dino tough guy Calvin Flint with a staggering hit. The collective breath of the 3,000 spectators all left after Henry’s work of art. After nearly thirty-five minutes of sailing on the Good Ship Blowout, Waterloo dealt their fans

The Nat.onals 1995-96 ---Semi-Finals -Acadin 4 UQTR 3 Warriors 5 Calgary 2 .: ----FINAL-Acadia 3 Wswriars 2

a plethora of heart palpitations, when with three minutes to go in period two, Calgary finally began hitting the net with their shots.. .and they were going in. Two quickies left the Warriors in a cold sweat, heading to the dressing room only up one goal, 3-2, after nearly own-

Notes from. the. ; Gondola

ing the Jurassic age creatures. The third looked to be more crucial then necessary as both teams knew: win, go on; lose, go home. Waterloo busted out hard just like the first period. Five minutes in, rookie forward Dan Mundell was left inexplicably alone in front of the Calgary goalmouth. John Wynne, whose hometown is, yes, Calgary, managed to poke check the puck at the Dino blue line past all the defenders (I swear there were only four Dinos on the ice and they didn’t have a penalty), and Mundell easily procured the disc, directing it safely over the shoulder of Kevin Koopman, who replaced the shaky Dawkins in the L Calgary net at the end of the second

period. The game, at that point, proved pretty much moot, but Mike Chambers closed the chapter entitled ‘Warriors win Semi-final game,’ with less than a minute to go, as he grabbed a loose puck, raced over the red line, and aimed the cute, little round rubber at the unoccupied Dino goal, vacant for an extra attacker. The clock ticked down, and the Warriors exploded in celebration, knowing how much this moment meant to them and their school. Truth be told, Waterloo Varsity athletic teams just don’t make it to very many national championships these days. And don’t feel sorry for the Dinos. They did destroy Western in football at last fall’s Vanier Cup. For Waterloo, the school returned to the title game for the first time in twenty-two years. For those ofus at UW, that was the greatest justice of all.

. . .,,.; k.@&:

Rookie a national title is akin to flying to the muon with Lkii osing Armstrong. Yuu*fe just as mpressive, and should get the acognition, but the buggerjumps ut first ahead of you+ For the

Varriors, Acadia jumped out to n three goal zad, and the Warriors, the best

.wkey team in the countq from anuary to Marci, over in time,



However, in retrospect of the easanpast, lest us not forget the mlorydays that madepossible this Rip to the national foals, The Varriors &serve every bit of recg&ion bestowed upon them this eason. Yes, they were gwd. )amn good.

They were also a beat-up ockey club, dam beat up, somehing bound to happen when caching this point of the season. “Ifyouknow what theseplay:rs came through to get to this boint, it’d make you think,‘” comnented Warrior head coach Don IlicKee. ‘4(Peter) Brearley played his weekend ~it.b pneumonia, Brian Hem-y separated his shuulter a while back, and Mike Chamrers came back in the third period

of the finaf) to win two key *kx@s for us on a badly sprained mkle. We never gave up.”




the biscuit

as he makes

his move




the net.

“AH year, this club has diskyed 8 tremendous ~~KNIII~of lisciptinc,” says a proud McKee #his +rges, .“lPeuple would say who are these guys?‘, but we’d &ways cume out working hard, day within our syste~~,and prove templewrung, This is the type of earn coaches like to Ix3ve.”




A lot of&e praise is fired thr coaches’ way3 too, Chad Palmer a rock-solid second-yea

defenceman stateda&x Sunday’; final, “Do~ie (McKee) is ~3.~2 doubtedIy tie backbone of hi; club. 1 can hoaest1ymy he is &I best coach I’ve ever had.” Davi Cressman, the associate coach also deserves praise fur hi; untiring effort and cumitment Despite all! the good feeling a couple of v&r;tns find them selves sadly alt the end of thei university c&reefs, Barring an! 3riar.1Henry-i&e decisions to re turn, captain John Wynne, powe forward Chris Krammx, the crati Sheldon Gilchrist, an; defencemen Brian Holk ant Henry may be waving good-bye Coach McKee relates, “I hur for the gaduat ing players. I kno\ how much they’ve worked a11yeas r. You know, I’ve always though that ifyou set your goals high, it’ going to hurt a lot when you dun’ succeed. lf you don’t work hard ur reach higher, a toss like today’s is just going to feel like any other day.” What are the Warriors going tu do now that the seasonis uver? McKee stresses it% time to cel-

ebrate and reflect OCIthe accomplisbents af the past year. If there were any doubts on whether u-r not McKee would ~&WI next year $0 coach, he will, at teast as lung as a CLW title eludes his IFaSP“We’re going to relax during the trip to Mexico; points out McKee. “We were the secondbest team in Canalda this year, md

that is nothing ta be ashamedof.” Nothing to be ashamed of, far sure. Boys, for the tihool, your fans, and fellow stidents, yuu did us proud.




Fridav. March 15.1996


John capswvnne-derful



Not even Rod Smith’s Cap’n John’s brilliant

by Ryan


massive, season.


Imprint staff


he Sullivan Award Winner. The best player in the whole of Canadian universities. The rock anchoring the defence of the second-best team in the nation. Or “The Duke.” Whatever comes to mind when you think of the captain of the Waterloo Warrior hockey team, the one defining feature of this man involves the aura in which he carries himself: it is professionalism linked with unselfishness. It’s special. It is the stuff of heroes. Here’s an example. On receiving the Sullivan Award for Player of the Year, Wynnenoted, “It meant so much to me that my team was there. The other two award winners, their teams weren’t there. They went up, got their award, and people clapped, but it really didn’t mean anything. I went up there and looked out and saw my family. I looked over and saw twenty-five guys who I’ve spent the entire year with, and without, I knew I wouldn’t be where I was today. Looking out and seeing that, well, it was fantastic.” Wynne developed into the consummate leader, a captain who led by example, but was never afraid to let his feelings known. He is a very emotional player on the ice. Even from the press box, you can tell





when Wynne is frustrated, jubilant, calm, or excited. Wynne, although a very experienced player beyond his years, has still learned a lot from himself and his teammates during this impressive season. “I’m very proud of our club. No one expected us to be there. We won the Queen’s Cup, and ending up in the national finals has just made this a dream season for all of us. “Everyone learned from our team that youdon’t necessariIy need a line-upofex-OHL stars to achieve the maximum from your club. Sure, we have guys like Peter Brearley, but we don’t have the financial packages the schools out East have to offer.” ’ Wynne, although he is leaving, sees a bright future for the club in the years ahead. “There’s lots of returning players coming back next year, and I think we’ve learned a lot from this past weekend. Hopefully, with a good recruiting year, the Warriors will return to the finals next year.” As for the weekend’s action, Wynne has definitely assessed the situation, has obviously come to a conclusion as to why the Warriors failed to win. “We were flat,” admits Wynne. “Our passing was off, the power play struggled. Everybody just started out flat. We were close, but

they got early breaks, a little bounces here and there, and that took a little out of us. “We had our chances that could’ve gone in with Esdale’s chance and Vaughner’s offthe post, but you need the breaks to win championships. No one can go on pure talent alone. We had the breaks all season, and the final was simply one of those games where it didn’t work. We played an absolutely perfect game Saturday against Calgary, and perhaps we didn’t have enough left for Sunday, but we never stopped working hard.” Wynne also had nothing but praise for second year puckstopper Joltin’ Joe Harris. “You couldn’t ask any more from Joe. To only give up three goals against Acadia and two against Calgary is just great. With a team like ours that scored a lot of goals this year, usually, that should have been enough to win.” Last week, the laid-back Calgary-native, by virtue of his Award and profile as the leader of the hottest team in Canada, drew himself to an incredible amount of exposure from the Canadian-wide media. The attention was not something the players were used to, but was appreciated. Wynne claims, “no one has seen that much since I’ve been here. It’s great to be in the spotlight when you’re used to playing in front of 100 people every night, and most of them are your mom and dad, and girlfriend. It’s nice to be able to show these guys (teammates) university hockey is still being watched. I think we put on a pretty good game, and it’s very appreciative to see people coming out and supporting us. I’ve never seen any other team receive that much support. Hopefully, this team will get another shot at the nationals, and take things one last step.” The captain also noted the point in the season when the team realized they had something special. When asked at the beginning of the season of the predicted fate of the Warriors, Wynne expected this year to be a rebuilding term like what Laker’s going through. “The turning point was January. At Christmas, we were 8-4,” calculates Wynne. “We knew the New Year brought a tough schedule with Western and Guelph right away. We won both, and then went the rest of January without losing. That was a big indication.” Wynne’s grateful for the opportunities that this season presented to him and his mates. “You can’t ask for anything more to end your university career than a trip to the national championships with a team like this. It was a great year, a great finish. We’re looking for a big party for the next couple of weeks.” As for the future, everyone knows whatever John chooses to do, in the rink or the working world, he will still carry himself with the samq-ofessionalism that he shows when he pulls the Black and Gold sweater with number five on the

back over his head. His immediate future still involves hockey, with the Warriors invited to play in Mexico as guests in an Intemational, all-expenses paid, week-long trip. “We should have a few laughs in Mexico,” hopes Wynne. “It is really a perfect ending to this phenomenal season. We’ve had a lot of ups and downs, mostly ups since November, but it will be fun to end the year with a bunch of hockey games that don’t mean a hill of beans.. . in Mexico.” Wynne will, after this season,




move along to a new plateau in his life. However, his influence on Waterloo will not soon be forgotten. Perhaps the last word should go to his defence partner, sophomore Chad Palmer. “John Wynne is undoubtedly the best hockey player I’ve ever played with,” notes Palmsie after the loss to Acadia. “There’s nothing that guy has to be ashamed of in his career. He is a positive example to us all.” The captain will also be remembered by Waterloo for his true nature. He was a winner.



Jbhn .’Wy&&

2 Waterloo Warriors .irkWidtial, .’



:‘. ..; :.1995.-96 c3Au Player cpf tlh.e: Yesir C&J 1st team All Star. : ‘. >.:. OUA~:lst%zu!n All Star 1994-95 > CfAU 2nd team All $tar,’

: ”



The Jaguarpounces

again. Oh my God, it’s...

Track by Jason Gregoire and Sandy Atwal rmprint staff


he past two weekends saw our Warriors and Athenas battle it out against the best at the OUAA/OWlAA (at York) and CIAU (at Windsor) Championships. In capping off a great season, the team set another 18 personal bests (PBS) bringing their season total to 150, and also gathered up six medals in the process.

All three Warrior competitors ran PB’s in the 60m at York, led by Tulu Makonnen (7.07s) finishing 8th overall, followed closely by Rob Giesen (7.27s) and Tory Locker (7.30s). These three then teamed up with rookie Drew Guckenburger to race to a 5th place finish in the 4x200mrelay (1:33.65 PB) in which all four ran PB relay legs. For these guys the training definitely paid off, or in Tory’s case, it might have just been the acquisition of actual running shorts.. ‘11. The 300m found Forrest Giesen run another PB of 37.66s while misfortune struckTulu in the race to the finish for a medal as he was disqualified for inadvertently stepping on the line. However, the Stealth made up for things in his first trip to CIAUs where he placed 7th overall in the nation. On the Athena side, the sprint team fantastic of Sue Cadarette,




to Do

IMPRINT, Fridary, March 15, 1996


Rachel Nickie, Melissa Hulford, and Jill Bennett all ran PB legs in taking the 4x200m team to a 4th place finish (1:44.70 PB) at the OWIAAS. Sue, Rachel, and Melissa also kept busy with excellent performances in the 60m, 30Om, and 4x400m relay races, where they amassed another 6 personal bests! Jill also ran well in her event, the 60m Hurdles, placing 6th overall. These four then made the trip to the ClAUs to run the 4x200m relay against the best in the nation. This time they beat Western (3rd at OWIAAs) and finished 5th overall in Canada, amassing 4 more PB’s along the way! The Distance

1500m. Gord had his finest 1 OOOm of the season with a personal best of 2:38.52. He came backjust an hour later to run a very respectable 4Q5.13 in the 15OOm. The other Warrior rookies, Jason Krell and Rich Lander rounded out their seasons with fine performances in the 1UOOm and 15OOm, respectively. Both these guys still have to learn how to show up on time, especially Krell who has spent way too much money on cab fare this season! ! ! The Athenas were led by Judith LeRoy who, despite being ill with a mean-spirited flu bug, also attempted the deadly double. Judith ran extremely tough to capture an OWIAA bronze medal in the 1500m (4:4 1.30) against excellent competition, and then placed a respectable 6th overall in the 3000m. Rookie Joelle Carmichael had her best performances of the season with an 8th place finish in the 1OOOm (3:02.16 PB) and a 12th place finish in the 600m (1:42.08 PB). Cheryl Turner capped off a fine season with 15th and 17th piace finishes in the 600m and 1OOOm, respectively. The Jaguar and Judith also made the trip to Windsor to compete against the best in Canada. Here again they would both double in the 3000m/1500m, but this time with a full night’s rest between the two! In the 15OOm event, both Jason and Judith raced to 7th place finishes against very tough fields,


The Warriors were led by who else but - Jason “the Jaguar” Gregoire. Competing in his last year, Jason ran the very difficult 1500m/3000m double at the OUAAs. Ranked 5th going into the 1500m, the Jaguar ran a PB of 3: 54.00 which resulted in his first silver medal of the competition. Just under two hours later, Jason was back on the track for 15 laps in the gruelling 3000m. Ranked 3rd and facing rested competition, Jason, despite still feeling the effects of his 1500m effort, acquired his second silver medal ofthe championships. Rookie Gord Kenny also ran a tough double in the 1OOOm and

Go walkabout





. trek

or gems

the Great






which in both cases was better than their 10th place rankings. However, it was on the night before that both had their better performances in the 3000m. Judith ran solid throughout the race, settling for 4th best in the nation and just missing out on the medal podium. The Jaguar ran his fastest 30OOm ever (8:27.30) which was good enough for his second career CIAU bronze medal; and with it came a close to an outstanding varsity career which included two OUAA Gold medals (3000m 1993; X-Country 1995), two OUAA Silver medals (3000m, l5OOm 1996), and two CIAU Bronze medals (3OOOm, 1994 and 1996) throughout his five years of running at Waterloo. Judith still has one more year in which she can wreak havoc in both cross country and indoor track! The Field Events Despite also being hampered by a nasty flu bug, pole vaulter extraordinaire Jeff Miller captured the silver medal at the OUAAs with a respectable vault (but disappointing by his standards) of4.65m. However, Jeff returned with a vengeance at the CIA& where he captured his 2nd consecutive Cl AU Gold medal with a much more Milleresque leap of 5.1 Om. Jeff, like the Jaguar, must also retire from varsity athletics but not without leaving his mark, which in-

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oath Dave Benning decided last weekend to evenly divide his squad into two teams to compete in the Brock Indoor Soccer Tournament. Ben&g was hoping, in light of missing many senior players due to co-op jobs, to give his first and second year players a chance to show their Stuff. In pool play Waterloo “A” finished in second place punishing Guelph 3-nil, tying McMaster Alumni 2-all, along with Brock “II”, and losing to Laurentian 3-l + The other Waterloo team also played some strong soccer gaining a wildcard birth into the playoffs. In pool play the Warriors beat Queens l-nil, tied McMaster l-all and lost to York Alumni. In playoffaction Waterloo “‘B” faced 1995 CIAU bronze medallist Brock. After playing three games with only two substitutes, the Warriors simply fell to Brock because of endurance, Waterloo ‘A” advanced all the




. $

eludes three CIAU medals (2 Gold, 1 Bronze) alnd OUAA medals too numerous to1 count! Also in the field events, both Jeff and Steffan Watson performed in the high jump at the OUAAs, where Jeff placed 9th overall and a disappointed Steffan unfortunately no-heighted. In the ‘Triple Jump, leaping Fred Hazelton led the way with a jump of 12.71m which was good for 1 lth place, followed closely by Jason Simpson ( 12.3 8m) and Drew Guckenburgier (12.04m). In the Long Jump, Jason led the way (6.2!5m; 14th place) with Fred and Drew not far behind. On the Athena side, Val Lingard placed 13th overall in the long jump with a leap of 4.6’7m, and Sue Cvitkovic placed 8th in the shot put with an excellent throw of 10.7Sm. And so, another track season has come to a close in which Waterloo athletes averaged over 5 personal bests each! In a sport where not everyone can be at the top, this is the true mark of individual success and all should be congratulated on their fine efforts and hard work. The athletes would like to once again thank their coaches for all their hard work and patience and to all track team members, especially those who are slowly recovering from the CI.AU banquet. There’s still one more PARTY to go... get your tickets for the Athletic Banquet! ! !

way to semifiinal action where they played the York Yeomen. In a very exciting and dramatic game the Warriors dropped a 3-nil lead to the Yeomen, but the Warriors did not give up. Waterloo picked away at the Yeomen’s lead and with less than a minute remaining the Warriors tied the game 3-all. In extra time it would be the Yeomen who would capitalize on their chances, but the Warriors had nothing to hang their heads about. This tournament showed how far the soccer program at Waterloo has come just over the past year. Coach Benning said that, “I am very pleased. with the lads, they showed some real character by not giving in when they were down. It’s nice to see that over the past year the younger players have really come along and taken the responsibility upon themselves to not only find the back of the net but to play some good all-around football.” Surely the Warriors are starting to show that they will be a team not to be taken lightly in the upcoming outdoor season.




Friday, March 15, 1996

Much Jov in Mudville



by Jeff Imprint

Peeters staff

: Waterloo’s



his fall, Waterloo will be looking for a few good men to f11l the roster for the good 01’ Waterloo Nine. Yes folks, baseball is coming to Waterloo. This fall Water100 will join the


of dreams.

Canadian Intercollegiate Baseball Association (CIBA), a league independent of the CIAO and OUAA. They will play around 20 games this season starting in mid-september with their goal being the CIBA championship in late October at Skydome. They will be playing in the Ontario West division against

Athletes of the Week

Judith LeRoy

Jeff Miller

Athena Truck and Field

Warrior Truck and Field

At the CIAU championships held last weekend in Windsor, LeRoy missed a medal by one placing, clocking 10: 10.73 in the 3000 metres, good for 4th in Canada. LeRoy also finished 7th in the 1500 metres and contributed to the Athena 4x400 metre relay team that finished 8th. LeRoy is a fourth-year Science student from St. Eugene, Ontario.

A fifth-year veteran and All-Canadian, Miller upheld his top ranking in the pole vault at the CIAU championships last weekend in Windsor. He took gold with a vault of 5.10 metres, beating his nearest competitor by 10 centimetres. A Scarborough native, Miller is in his third year of Mechanical Engineering studies.

teams such as Brock, U of T, Guelph, McMaster, Laurier and Durham College. All CIBA games are seven innings long, unlike regular baseball rules, and all umpires will be required to call the standard book strike zone (from the top of the knees to the mid-point between the waist and shoulders) in order to maintain some degree of consistency. All other rules remain the same. According to Jeff Sommer, who has been working hard to get the team formed, university baseball in Canada is a big market that hasn’t been exploited, and with baseball being so big in Southern Ontario high schools, he feels that there are plenty of good kids out there wanting to take it to the next level. He appears to be correct. Over 60 people have already indicated their interest. Jeff has been working with the Waterloo Minor Baseball Association to help set up some of the necessities of a baseball team, such as a General Manager, some field coaches, promotions and a field to play on. Working with Laurier and the town of Waterloo, both schools have secured the use of Bechtel Park (on University just past Hwy. 86) for the upcoming season. According to Jeff, the town is very enthusiastic and has agreed to keep the diamond in playing condition for as long as the two teams need it. The team already has a manager in place for the upcoming campaign, J.P. Soucie, who has playing experience in the NCAA and minor leagues, will be the skipper for this year’s squad. A young manager, he will be able to relate with the players well as they all go through the learning process together. One problem facing the team is funding. Since baseball is not a varsity sport, the team will have to supply all of its own funding for uniforms, equipment, transportation, umpires, diamond rentals and other baseball necessities. Plans are in place for fundraisers, including obtaining a Bingo license and securing sponsorships. Both Waterloo and Laurier will be working together as well to help pool their resources. The team will be holding workouts next week, Monday to Wednesday from 7-9 pm in the PAC small gym. All are invited, For those who don’t end up making the 20-25 man roster, there are plans in the works to form a recreational house league with players f?om Laurier that would play during the fall. This house league could also serve as a minor league, developing future players and providing emergency call-ups for the major squads. Anyone interested in finding out more information can call Jeff Sommer at 725-5 194 or e-mail him at j wsommer@cousteau.

160 University Ave. W, (Next to U of W),



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4 x 400 METRERELAY Manitoba YORK 4 x 800 METRE RELAY Wani toba WINDSOR Calgary







tKK.KEYRESULTS CIAU CHAMPIONSHIPS Acadia 4 UQTR Waterloo 5 Calgary Acadia 3 Waterloo






2 2

CIAU cHmPIwwIPs of Windsor TEAM Manitoba Windsor Alberta Sherbrooke York U8C

March 8th L 9th

POINTS 58 53 42 31 26 20 18 17 14 12

Western Toronto McGill Dalhousie Calgary Waterloo Victoria Concordia Saskatchewan Lakehead Queen's

11 11 5 4 4 2 2

1 Central Florida






Fraser Chapman Tyler Kennedy Lindsay Parry Todd Somerville Layne Gardner Mike White



Manitoba McGill

7.41 m

7.21 w

15.14 m 14;73 II 14.72 111



EAST 1 1-1


15.96 MI

WINDSOR. 14.79'm

Western Queen's Guelph Western Queen's Queen's

TEAM Laurier RMC Carleton RMC Laurier Carleton


72 OT 77 OT


TEAM STANDINGS: Points 65.5 48b 47 22

Toronto TEAM tuelph Waterloo Western Queen's HcMaster Western Queen's McMaster Western York York McMaster Queen's Queen's McMaster York


Western Alberta McGill Saskatchewan Lakehead


19 19 17

14 11.5 10

INDIVIDUAL RESULTS: listed in gold, silver, order): Venolyn Clarke (Windsor) Sharon Crandison (York) Esther Wema (Alberta) Venol yn Clarke (Windsor) Marcia Rodney (Windsor) Frances Bennett (Sask.)




LOCK Mark Wellwood LOCK Chad Yates #8 Ethan Cucfa FLANKER Chad Har kness FLANKER Adam Van Staveren SCRUMHALF Daryl Callcott SCRUMHALF Chris Weir FLY HALF Duncan McNaughton CENTRE Rick Marshall WING Jean-Yves Be1zi 1e WING Kirk Wilson FULLBACK Dave Howard FULLBACK Paul MacDonnell Peter Jamison Matt Kavanagh COACH Les Davidson



bronze 7.60 7.63

7.83 39.33

40.07 40.56 Brock Carleton Laurier RMC Carleton Trent Carleton RMC Brock RMC Brock Carleton

Laurier Toronto Toronto RMC

Jennifer Hunter (LaCehead) Stephanie Couin (Windsor) Carobe Vachon (Laval) Triple Jump Althea Williams (Tororhto) Jennifer Williamson (York) Dim Dykxhoorn (Windsor) High Jump Treva Thomas (Toronto) Shary Leedahl (Calgary) Gaby Szanto (York) Shotput Christa Coebel (York) Jill Ryback (Manitoba) Kerianne Pearce (Manitoba) Pole Vault (exhibition) Jul ianne McGregor (Toronto) Jackie Homey (Hani toba) Caby Szanto (York)

5.99~ 5.970 5.8Dm 12.53a 12.27r 12.2Sa

1.7lm 1.7lm 1.68m 13.15m 13.05n 13.01e 3.4Om 3.251~ 2.95m

CIAU CHAMPIONSWS March 15th UBC 0) vs Concordia (8) 12:DD pm Alberta (5) us McMaster (4) 2:00 pm Dalhousie (3) vs Toronto (6) 6:00 pm Acadia vs Brandon (2) 8:00 pa March 16thc7' Consolation Semi Finals 1O:DD an & 12:DD pn~ Championship Seri Finals 4:00 pa & 6:30 pm March 17th Consol ation Final 10:30 am Charpionshi p Final l:oO pm NOTE: All times are EST. Connecticut (1) I Colgate (16) 1 P. Michigan (9) 1 me 1






Princeton (13) I Dcu (41 1

The Final Four

tiorgia Tech (3) 1 Austin Peay (14) I Boston Coll. (11) I Indiana (6) I Tlll~l.


17) 1

(10) I

tx-GrwMboro (15) Cincinnati (2)


March 30


April 1


1 Sunday

(15) ---+






Moatana St. SyrXUUe





Valpamiso (14)



G. Hauhiagton (11) Iowa


Mafch21 I-Note : First round games


4336.70 4136.72 9:44.54 9:49.40 9: S2.08



(11) 1 Louisv~llm (6)

2:54.00 2:54.56 4:36.40




I Tuba

1:34.94 2:53.18

ton!4 Jw

March21 1


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Virginia Tech (9) Wisconrin-GB (a)





,Jentucky (1)

I Vill&novl

Manitoba YORK 7.16 R

60 49

St. (15)

1 Kim. Valley 'C;+orgetom

1 Potthnd


WATERLOO 5.10 q Al berta 5.00 m WINDS0R 4.90 q

1:33.20 1:34.47

va. conm. (12) 1


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2.07 m

45 60 67 69



I NmwMexico (71 ’ Xansas St. ilb)

2.33 RI 2.10 111

CIAU BASKETBALLCHAMPIONSHIP FINAL TEAM STANDINGS: round: 8 Western 58 Laurentian McGill 68 Victoria Manitoba 72 Dalhousie Toronto 89 Lava1 9 Consolation semi-finals: Dalhousie 67 Laurentian Victoria 65 Lava1 Chapionship semi-finals: Manitoba 93 Western Toronto 71 kGil1 10 Fifth-place gaRe: Victoria 77 Dalhousie flronze-redal game: McGill 75 Western Cold-medal game: Manitoba 81 Toronto

Paula Peters (Dalhousie) Kristina Farr (Western) Pauline Fox (tuclph) loo01 Dianne Wiseman (York) Jennifer Graham (wi ndsor) Suzanne Binne (Manitoba) 15oOa Dianne Wiseman (York) Tmbra Dunn (McGill) Dana Cunningham (Windsor) 3000~ Tambra Dunn (McGill) Sarah Hunter (Toronto) Angela S&van (Western) 6&n Hurdles Tracy Higgs (Windsor) 8.60 Janna Nikkei (M&to&a) 8.60 Esther Hedema (Alberta) 8.68 4x2001r Relay Windsor 1:40.97 Manitoba 1:44.02 York 1:44.33 4x400~ Relay Dal housie 3:52.66 Manitoba 3:54.76 Windsor 3:54.78 4x800~ Relay Windsor 9:08.94 Dal housic 9:09.76 Manitoba 9:11.17

Th e NCAA Men’s f Basket ball Championship




DIVISION I INDIVIDUAL Ryan Deforge Dale Finlay Nick Gri ffi ths Andrew Desson Adam Marshall Grayson Lafoley Brady Carthy #8 Ian Dann FLANKER Ryan Graham FLANKER Jeff tletherington SCRUMHALF Sam Mancuso SCRUMHALF Glen Miller SCRUMHALF Ian Parker FLY HALF Steve Pettigrew IN. CENTRE Steve Gittens OUT. CENTRE Barclay Luke OUT. CENTRE Kyler Petrie WING Adam Hepburn WING Kyle Nichols FULLBACK Elarry O'Shea FULLBACK Patrick Wagner COACH Al Ferguson



/New Orleans (11) ,No. Carolina (6)

First Mar.



1 ?klr!awuth (13) uarquatte (4) 1 Terar Tech (3) ;No. Illinois (14)

7:43.16 7:44.23


(1) (1

I Stanford (9) (8) I Bradley I Penn state(5) I Zlrkanrar (12)



INDIVIDUAL MEDALLISTS 60 METRE L. Sebastien Sherbrooke 6.89 Rohan Neil Alberta 6.89 Kelly Crerar Manitoba 6.92 300 M Rohan Neil Alberta 34.29 Stephane Belfort Sherbrooke 34.97 CARLOCHIOCCHIO YORK 35.05 600 M Daryl Fill ion Manitoba lzl9.34 PumuIo Sikaneta McGill 1:19.47 C4RLO CHIKCHIO YORK 1:20.12 1000 M Daryl Fillion Manitoba 2:24.19 Scott Jenson Calgary 2:24,21 RIM TREMAIN WINDSOR 2:25.09 1500 M Dan Hennigar Dalhousie3;51.71 RICH TREMAIN WINDSOR 3:S2,76 Neal Beattie Victoria 354.00 3DDD M Jeff Schiebler UBC 7: 59.29 RDB TYNDALL WESTERN 8: 19.68 JASON CREGORIE WATERLOO8:27.30 60 METRE HURDLES KYLE ROBINSON WINDSOR 8.02 MIKE NOLAN WINDSOR 8.23 John Etienne Sherbrooke 8,28 4 x 200 METRERELAY Sherbrooke 1:28.77 Alberta 1:28,80 YORK 1:30.14

I Massachusetts

3:19.86 3:19.93




began yesterday

and conclude


Sunday /

3. Carolina St. (15) I Karmas (2) 1

Ping Pong Action

at UW.


Can Do Kendo


W7lho’s the l3oss?

by Heidi Marr special to Imprint






by Heidi Man special to Imprint


recently had the opportunity to speak with an extraordinary per son. Frank Erdrlyi is 75 years old, but he’s more active than I am. Frank is the UW Table Tennis Club president, ti position he has held for the last thirty years. The Table Tennis Club exists because of Frank’s volunteering efforts. He maintains the equipmerit and operates the club’s finances. Other tasks include set-up, which Franks seems to have mastered, as he claims he can set up seven tables in 1~~s than five minutes. Muny people are unaware of‘ the intricacicls ol‘the sport, so Frank explained some of them to me. He told me table tennis is like chess because you have to outsmart your opponent using tricks...although and a few quick reflexes don’t hurt. Once someone learns the basits, their reflexes improve, giving them greater coordination sod enhanced mental processes. When someone becomes a great table tennis player, they also gain an advantage in other sports. Frank thinks he would make a great hockey goalie. If he can stop a flying ping-pong ball at close


a thrashing

at the hands

range, imagine what he could do with a puck coming at him from 50 meters. He iigures that would be child’s play. I was always under the impression that table tennis was child’s play until I watched some of the UW club members at the sport. They really worked up a sweat and the ease with which they dodged and danced reminded me of Forrest Gump. The UW Table Tennis Club consists of about 35 members, who meet in the Blue Activity Area,

of Frank



“Table tennis is entertaining, good exercise, and inexpensive”. He also said it was a safe sport, as concussions are rare. Frank is also a good indicator that participation is not restricted by age, Table tennis can also take up as little or as much time as a player can afford. At UW, the club meets regularly with sessions on Wednesdays, 7:30- lO:OOpm, Fridays, 6:309:30pm, and Sundays l-5pm. It only costs @/term to join. Ifyoudojoin,you’ilbeingood hands. Frank told me, “I’m here to help the students” and he takes his position seriously. However, he also puts up a challenging fight al the tables. He plays against far younger opponents, and said, “I’m 75 years old and I play against these guys but ifthey win, they’re very happy”. He’s not just bragging. Frank was originally a boxer in Hungary but one day his wife thought he should take up table tennis, so he

It seems to have been a wise decision. This man has won the Eastern Canada Senior award which provides ample space for their and the France-Canada-Germany Alliance for table tenseven tables. Although it is a relanis. When his friend, tively unpopular sport .in two-time Canadian chamCanada, table tennis is actually the * second most popular sport in the pion, visited UW, Frankchallerlged world. There are 10 million regishim to a match. After winning their first three games, Frank told his tered players in China alone. friend, “You may be the Canadian These players must know champ, but in this town, l’m the something we don’t; Frank explained the interest, He said that, boss”.

ave you ever considered Kendo as a polential sport? Well, according to Ed Chau, UW Kendo Club Executive, here’s the deal: “Kendo is really the only place around where you get to wear cool, samurai-like armour and whack other people over the head with bamboo swords for your “spiritual/physical improvement”.” The UW Dojo Head, Hyun-June Choi, agreed, saying, “Where else would you beat up people with a stick, legally, and feel good about it? Seriously though, it is the best martial art in my opinion, and it is the only one that you can continue to practice actively well into advanced age”. They explained the philosophy behind the sport for me. Kendo is a “Do”, literally meaning the “way” of’ doing something. But behind every “Do” is a long, deep-rooted history and tradition in the “art”. The philosophy of most “Do’s” is to improve ones self-discipline and both physical and mental health. Unlike other martial arts, Kendo doesn’t cmphasizc combat. Rather, Kendo believes in “Ki-Ken-Tai” meaning “Mind-SwordBody”. Ed told me that, “It is through the practice ot‘ Kundo thut one disciplines one’s own mind, sword, and body. Physical pmwcss is mt the most important factor, but rather, the ability to control one’s “KiKen-Tai”, especially when fatigued or under pre?,sure”. The UW Kendo Club practices controlling their “Ki-Ken-Tai” three times a week. They meet in Studio I at the PAC on Moncirty~, 71 lpm, Thursdays, 7- 1 lpm and Saturdays I 1:30arn-2:3Opm. The club currently consists of 15 members - 8 beginners and 7 veterans. f;ive other “non-active” members are away on workttxm right now. The ciub always welcomes experienced new mcmhcrs. However, due to the progressive nature of teaching, it is best if novices join at the beginning of term. However, Ed said that if someone is truly enthusiastic about joining, they may be considered until midway through the term. If you are interested in learning about the UW Kendo Club, check out their website for a brief club history, at For more information, e-mail Ed Chau at eychau@novice or Hyun-June Choi at hchoi @novice.

As smooth The Tea Party Fed Hall

Friday by Patrick




Imprint staff


ad Jeff Martin shaved his head years ago, I wonder if anyone would have come up with the now-ubiquitous Doors comparison. Beyond the image of poetically distant gaze and unkempt hair (which Martin recently cut short), the Tea Party bears little resemblance, musical or otherwise, to the Doors. There may be, granted, a similar dark visionary tendency behind the works of both, but artistic integrity surely has never been grounds for musical dismissal. Some may say that Martin’s vocals mimic the peyoted voice of Morrison. Since no one has ever heard Jim Morrison actially sing, only moan and shout rhythmically over the course of several dozen albums, it’s a difficult call. But enough with the Doors comparisons. The most significant contribution the Far East made to their music was a hookah pipe in Morrison’s bedroom. Windsor’s Tea Party, on the other hand, practices a strange sort of composite sound that mixes Celtic and Far Eastern music with North American hard rock. The only common factor between songs is the voice of

Mr. Martin, perhaps rock’s most charismatic and enigmatic frontman since you-know-who. The Tea Party certainly can draw a crowd. Fed Hall was sold out for the Friday night show, even at eighteen dollars a head. Dayna Manning was the unlisted opening act. The choice ofthe young solo singer-songwriter was surprising, but appropriate -- no rock group could have fared well in comparison to the headliners. Manning has an amazingly powerful and expressive voice, which she backs with her acoustic guitar. If I hadn’t heard the music of Jewel, I’d be much more impressed, although the music world does have more than enough room for both of them. I’ve been fortunate enough to have a sneak listen to some amazing songs from her upcoming album, and it’s evident that ManSee how ning is an original. Then, the Tea Party. You get what you pay for -in this case, quadruple the amount

as Kashrnir

his love stays


of usual speakers, of extra lighting,

a couple arrays and two huge

set of acoustic songs. He then produced a hurdygurdy (“That’s French for ‘dead cat.’ “) Just when 1 thought he’d finished tuning it, he ex-

changed instruments. My view from the back or the mosh pit wasn’t good enough to pick out exactly what he was playing - a xylophone-like instrument, something else like a slide guitar, but all with an unmistakable Far Eastern feel. He didn’t get the audience’s complete u:ndivided attention, of course. Most people were too interested in moshing. The band returned to rock mode for the rest of the show. “Save Me” incorporated a sincere and energetic cover of Nine Inch Nails’ “Hurt,” quickly followed by some “Voodoo Child” blues. Other than that, if you want a set list, alsk a bootlegger. The exact song s aren’t important. It was the tota.lity of the Tea Party’s stage domination, whipping the crowd into constant motion with their unique: sound. The oOicia1 show concluded with every one of the trio playing percussion, and there followed the inevitable encore, The acoustic instrumental “Winter Solstice,” however, was not the way to end the show with a bang. Hence, the second encore ~ but only, Martin said, “Ifyou’regoodlittle pagans.” The Tea Party finished off with “The River,” and then it was over. The ninety minutes had felt like fifteen. Our inner pagans trudged home through the snow, dreaming of desert lands and sacrificial rites on the moors. a

Flying Saucers, Bumbling Pupp:les Battle of the Bands Rondxhelru

Friday by Greg




Imprint staff


hree years ago, a young and inexperienced UW band sat down to give their very first interview for a local fanzine. The occasion? They were competing in the annual campus Battle of the Bands competition at the Bomber. The winners of that seven-band bill were a then prominent local band called the Dervishes, who have since split up, but this new group managed to be the runners-up of the evening. That band? Tristan Psionic. So potentially this could be an interesting evening, an oppotiunity to see the genesis uf a band on their way to the top. This year, five acts competed for the grand prize of $100 and either a nooner or opening slot at the Bomber. Second and third prizes of $50 and $25 were also available. The rules governing the competition were simple. Each act had to be comprised ofat least 50% UW

students. They each had twenty minutes to perfoml. Each act was assessed according to their talent, stage presence, and originality by a panel of three judges, marking independantly of one another. At the end of the night, the results were tabulated and the band with the highest score won. Present on the panel that night were Rose Bilicic, current VP University Affairs, Kelly Foley, incoming VP Education and CKMS personality, and, well, yours truly. Saucer was the act in the unenviable position of being the first act on, the icebreaker. Fortunately for them, they rose to the challenge admirably. The lead guitarist was playing a flying-V guitar, which would normally suggest a Metallica cover band, but that was hardly the case here. They’ve obviousIy been listening to the latest crop of’ W-it bands, even to the point that the lead singer reminded me of Rick Witter from Shed Sevi;3n. Probably the best comparison howeverwould be earlier Echo and the Bunnymen, considering their penchant for deep, dark bass lines (such as on “A.mong My Colours”) and angsty vocals a la Ian McCulIoch.

Their playing was tight and well rehearsed, setting the tone for the acts coming after them that were equally prepared for the show. The guitarist was notable for his panoply of effects pedals, used liberally but not overwhealmingly through the set. Though they might improve with some vocal lessons for the lead singer, Saucer were a fine group of individuals that showed a real sense of style and musical innovation, Up next was Craig Cardiff, the only solo act of the show, not counting the light electrical guitar player that accompanied him. I would hazard a guess that Craig is very fond of his Pearl lam collection, with every note belted forward for maximum pain-ridden effect. Combine this with a Yash the Slash-like tendancy tojerk ;lbout while performing, and you have a show that was on pins and needles the entire way. It also meant that the audience was treated to cc)vers of both “Mrs. Robinson” and especially “Add it Up” that were a bit over the top. Craig can play though, he justneeds to stick to some originals that can be fit to his slightly unusual style.

The most recognizable name on the bill was probably Bertha’s Attic, a band that’s no stranger to the local music scene in the past. As such, they were probably the most cohesive and tight band of the evening. They exuded a genuine exuberance about making music, and getting out there onstage to let us hear it. The band appeared to be quite young, with the exception of a metalhead bass player that looked completely at odds with the rest of them. But looks can be deceiving, and in fact their sound was quite melodious, fairly straightforward rock with some keyboard bits here and there to make it more interesting. Basically all the tools are there for a long and successful career if the band can maintain their sense of enthusiasum. Paintbox wert: fourth on the bill, another band in love with English musical stylings. If you listen hard though, there’s a detinitc desire to strike out from this - the Blur-like guitar chops were minced through effects pedals, especially on the closing track, creating something all their own, and wonderful to listen to. The future of Britpop

coming frolm Canada? Perhaps, but before that happens some work needs to be clone as far as vocals go. They tended1 to be harsh and almost grating, like a flat Damon Albam, so with some vocal lessons Paintbox’s presence on the local scene will grow. Bumble Puppy caused people to double-take at their oddball stage presence. The lead singer was a wild eyed Ed Kowaiczuk from Live look-alike, while the tambourine player was this jock-type guy in a baseball cap that looked like an alien being, compared with Ihe rest of the rather arty looking band. And the music was wild and enthusiastic to match, sort of your usual hard American indie rock smnd. But the important thing here was the stage show. which was the most entertaining, uf the night. I hope they stick with it for a while. The winners‘? Saucer managed to edge out the other four to take the $100 prize, while Bertha’s Attic and Bumble Puppy were second and third respectively. More than a night to discover new talent, it turned out to be a night of just simple fun. Look for Saucer in performance on campus soon.

Save Dance The University of Watertoo Dance Department presents Swan Song Hwnuni~ic-ls Thuatre Sunday March IO by Greg Imprint


Fridav, March 15, 1996


Krafchick staff


o that’s it-The end ofthe dance department at IJW. The last hurrah, the final curtain...the Swn Song, if you will. After 24 years of existence, the first department in North America to offer a BSc. in Dance will be no more after this year. A victim of funding cuts long before the days of Mike Harris and the current fiscal situation, the final eight students left in the program are set to graduate this year, and the dance studios in East Campus Hall will be no more. The majority of students on campus today were either not around or no longer recall the hot debate over the elimination of the dance department made back in early ‘93. To make a long story short, the proposal was wigindly made by thedean ofA.H.S., the fituuitydance

M’ilh piid t0 Of,


the Last for Me and a onetime association with the National Ballet. She then made a point of mentioning as many graduates and faculty in the department as she could, and the various accvmplishments they have managed over the years following or during their stay at Waterloo. Her aim was to emphasize the positive, instead of dwelling on the sad occasion of the performance. Nevertheless, the emotions proved to be too overwhelming, and the few tears shed at the conclusion of her address were no doubt repeated by many throughout the theatre. From there the performance began, a cornucopia of different musical and movement styles. Besides the two traditional dances at the stti (an Iberian folk dance and

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the program as a cost culting me:;Isure:. ‘Tons of articles and editorials were published in Imprint, as the final decision bounced from A.H.S. to the Senate, but the end result was the department’s termination. I recall that it wils a story that really hit home. 1‘m in Classical Studies, a flculty ofcomparible size. Who was lo say that nl-y program wouldn’t be next on the chopping block? Or drama? Or film studies’? Dancing Or some other small, “artsy” (read unimportant) community at this university? What’s more, the funding situation for PSE today is far worse than it was three years ago, when programs accommodating 84 students (1992-93 figures for dance) were being cut. If you’re in first year, and don’t know already, the university life you know today will be different when you graduate three, four, or possibly five years from now. l’m sure many people had thoughts akin to these as Keynote Spcakcr Jillian Officer took the stage Sunday afternoon. Ms. Officer retired from the UW Dance department in 1992, after a career at this university that spanned 25 In that time she helped years. found the department and chair it for seven years, developed L;OLKSGS in Dance History and Ballet, and was honoured with the Distinguished Teacher Award in 1979. Officer talked at length about the birth of the department, and the various stages of development it went through, such as the eventual elimination of the BSc. program,

“Another Day” by This Mortal Coil. Her movements constantly changed tempo, making for a mysterious and wonderful piece that made as good an attempt as anyone could to put action to the angellic voice of Liz Fraser. Janis Price Stone’s jazz-ballet routine to Annie Lennox “Why.” Reminiscent of Kate Bush’s video for”Running Up That Hill,” Stone and her partner Bill Albrecht were able to tell a siIent story through their emotive actions and fantastic choreography. An epic story entitled “Beauty Unidentified” by Gabby Kamino. Six dancers paced through a many faceted piece that probably told a different story to each person in the audience - a remarkable accomplishment. Sylvanus Klotz’s “Sunflower.” Set to the songs of jazz chanteuse Dinah Washington, his vigorously athletic performance added some badlyneeded levity to the whole day. Also a savior in this department: the rolickmg “A Close Brush With Dance” by Pamela Grundy, that consisted of four women brushing their hair in perfect time to the big bands sounds of Duke Ellingtcin. John Gzowski Xcompanying a solo Julie Aplin on an instrument apparently of his own invention, the Gzowskovarious. Let’s just say if Thurston Moore played the cello, it would sound like a Gzowskovarious-inother words, pretty damn cool. The list of people onstage and choreographing was a Pandora’s Box of accomplishments. Students at Julliard, heads of dance companies in Toronto and New York, teachers and chairs of dance departments - a litany of fme achievements too long to list here. After the last performance (an uptempo number entitled “Cyber Folk” that saw the entire graduating class participating) the audience burst into applause for the curtain call, but for some odd and frankly infirriating reason the nearly sold out audience stayed planted in their seats, and there was no second curtain call. Uh...hello? Might they perhaps deserve a standing ovation after 24 years? Sometimes cultural life is taken for granted. I had never been to a dance performance in my five years here, and I know I’m not alone. Yet now I feel like I’m missing something, even if it is just a smail department of people over in East Campus Hall. A wise person once said that Science allows people to live, but the Arts make that life worth living. On Sunday many people’s lives became a little darker, a little less fill. We’ll miss you. l


the twilight

of history.

a Spanish ballet) the exhibitions focussed on modern methods, but besides that there was very little that linked the lot of them together. t’ll say right off the bat that I’m hardly an expert in this field, and I’m not going to pretend to be. But I don’t think you’d need expertise in the field of dance to appreciate the beauty, athleticism and emotion inherent in every pirouette, every leap, every nuance of expression that these artists projected. If you have a soul, you qualify. I was also struck by the high level of skill exhibited by each and every performer. For a department currently comprised of “eight brave students” (as the director remarks) their scolastic training has not suffered, their abilities honed to a more than respectable point. And the highlights? Well, over the course of a two hour plus perfornxmce there were a great deal of them, so many that perhaps it’s best to just list them... Martha Rupert’s beautzfd interpretation of a personal favorite l

and much much more to come! *tickets available at Fed Office and HMU-Waterloo*

all shows produced b) Bent 1%the Federation of Students

the eric’s trip show




Eric’s Trip w/ The Monoxides, Superfriendz, Made and treble charger Lee ‘s Palace




Elevator To Hell w/ The Hardship Post, Pure, Bluebeard, The Shuttlecocks and Project 9 Lee’s

Sunday by Sean Elder hlprlnt stafT






& Rob Potton

ast week, Canadian Music Week happened in Toronto. Last weekend, Canadian music happened to Lee’s Palade. While the Lee’s Palace shows weren’t connected to the independent music fkstival, they were celebrated with similar spirit and goals. The many bands and record labels that were represented all want as many people to hear their music as possible. Ifthe all-ages crowds at Lee’s Palace this weekend were any indication, then the bands and record labels are outdoing themselves. Call it the sounds of Moncton. Call it the Eric’s Trip show. Call it what you will, this weekend’s festivities, while headlined by Eric’s Trip and Elevator To Hell (a side project of Eric’s Trip), included bands from towns across Canada. The promoters can be proud as these shows rocked; even next to the unbridled raw talent of some of the younger acts, the worst aspect of the shows was the club’s policy of a mandatory coat check. Sturday ‘s performance kicked off as treble charger hit the stage under the trick moniker “MC 19

and under.” Promising a new, mellower sound, the band delivered with a set comprised entirely of new songs. Neither of us were really in the mood to see this buzz band again. By the end of their set, however, we appreciated their show as much as we’ve appreciated NC 17 shows of years past. Maybe it was the enthusiastic elementary school audience, maybe it was because they were the first band of the afternoon. It probably had something to do with new radio-friendly rockers such as “Surefire,” which quickly put the mellow aspect of treble charger’s set to rest. Next up was Toronto’s Made,




whose loud and grinding gift to this festival really should have been given back. The four piece went over extremely well with the teenybopper mosh pit, but their blaring drone didn’t fool those of us who were standing still. Made have something that is unexplainably catchy about them. On this afternoon, one or two songs were impressive; the rest of them made us wish we’d remembered our earplugs. Straight outta Halifax, the Superfriend aim to please. Playing several new tunes mixed in with favourites from their debut CD Mock up, Scale down, the Superfriendz kept their crowd from start to finish. Guitarist and lead singer Matt Murphy stole the show, clad in a purple silk shirt and periodically launching himself off of Lonnie James’ drum set. He’s also an amazing guitarist. The Superfriendz had it together throughout their set, playing some incredibly thunderous live versions of songs that appear to be quite tame recordings. The Superfriendz allowed us to humbly forgive the promoters for inviting Made. Loud, loud, loud. Wow. The Monoxides are really damn loud. There must be something in the water out there in Moncton that causes bands to blast the roofs offof clubs. Even Rick White, master of things noisy, claims “it’s thanks to them I have gotten much practice at recording loud music.” That’s testimonial enough. Wearing matching black t-shirts with a big yellow number 6 printed on them, The Monoxides pulled the final stunt in a long line of intricate steps on their way to becoming rock gods. Namely, they swung their guitars in unison. In fact, their synchronized axe waving almost made up for the fact that they were so loud. The Monoxides’ volume and their placement in the semi-marathon lineup of bands both lent to the crowd’s anxious lack of acceptance of the band. If The Monoxides are an acquired taste, your eardrums would be sore by the time youcaught on. Besides, the show must go on,

and on it went. Moncton’s other contribution of the afternoon was accepted with open arms. In the midst of nasty rumours that Eric’s Trip are nearing their final tour, the band played this secluded show with an angst never before witnessed by their Ontario audience. While this wasn’t


ive. Their now defunct romantic nvolvement plays a prominent role n many of the band’s lyrics and longs. It also comes through in their live show, as Rick and Julie can sing with each other so exceedingly well that it seems as though they’re actually having conversations on stage. Even during Satur-

by Rick.

one of the best shows we’ve ever seen the band play, it was still an Eric’s Trip show. It was outstanding. Guitarist Rick White and Bassist Julie Doiron-Claytor make for a dramatic and dynamic vocal match on several songs, both recorded and

day’s show, when Julie seemed a bit shaky with her vocals in some older Eric’s Trip songs, their energetic on stage connection still existed. Eric’s Trip’s performance especially emphasizes their different and similar writing styles. Each member has another band on the side and writes for Eric’s Trip accordingly: Rick plays guitar in his Elevator to Hell (keep reading for more), Julie plays solo as Broken Girl, Guitarist Chris ‘Thompson does the same as Moonsocket, and Mark Gaudet plays drums in both Elevator to Hell and Purple Knight, a band that has spanned across three decades. These different bands and side projects all lend to the varied sounds of Eric’s Trip, sounds that were apparent Saturday afternoon throughout their set. Blasting through the fast paced “I’m So Near Here” to open the show, the band continued into “Sixteen Hours” and “Blinded” until Rick yelled a giant “SPACESHIP!” to introduce “Spaceship Opening.” Anyone who wasn’t giving Eric’s Trip their full attention a few seconds earlier were completely entranced by them now. When the band played full throttle into “Happens All The Time” with Julie singing the vocals, they drilled horns Continued

to page 38


Pleasure by Andrew Imprint



The Noi ember cancellation atso meant that there would be no Silvsrch:lir, and no Flaming Lips. Instc;ld, the opening slots were tilled b>. Spacshog and Toadies. Kicking off their short but sweet set, Spacehog successfully primed the diminutive crowd, (it was only 7:30 at this point). playing% the Meantime” and “Space is the Place” and beginning the inevitable moshing f&i\ifks. After telling the crowd

Almond Namesake w/The Nuts Last Hur??*‘s Saturday March 9 by Curtis Gloade special to Imprint itchener’s Namesake and The Nuts snaked their IL ounds through the nooks of Last Harry’s Saturday night for a lively and appreciative audience. The Nuts (formerly Tarzan’s Nuts) went on first by playing a long set of their own songs mixed with several surprisingly diverse covers. Early in the set they covered the recent ska hit from Rancid, then later moved on to songs from Odds, Green Day, and Spirit of the West. Comfortable with their masculinities, they played a Jackson 5 tune which all-too-many people bobbed their heads to. While thecrowd enjoyed those selections, many looked as though they would prefer to hear Bob Seger instead. downtown Ahhh, Kitchener. The trio further displayed their musical dexterity with their own songs, which varied from hardhitting rock (“Cookin With Gas”) to deep blues (“That Dam Master,” I think) to jazzy digressions (“Seems).” Although many in the room had not heard the group’s original songs, there wasn’t a shortage of tapping toes and whooping applause. The Nuts, under various names, have been part of the K-W music scene for the past decade, so they know how to work a room. Clearly they would like to be in a



Friday. March 15. 1996


to “F*ck Off,” Spacehog left the stage triumphant, having performed a highly entertaining halfhour set. Next up, Toadies. Frontman Todd Lewis annoyed me from the word go, or more precisely, the wurd “F*ck.” Why is it that so many bands i&A the need to spew prof%nities at their audiences“ While they think they’re making a point, they’re merel’y making an ironic, lewd version of a point. Regardless of my like or dislike for the obscene ways of Toadies, their music was an uninspired hodgepodge orabrasive (for lack of a better word) vocals and over the top power chords. Each song was as loud and obnoxious, not to mention boring, as the next. The only song that didn’t put me off was “Mr. Love” but even that tune pales in comparison to the recorded version. It is obvious that Toadies are a band that should stay in the studio and leave the touring to bands that understand the meaning of the word dynamic. On to the main course. The Red Hot Chili Peppers walked on the stage to thunderous applause, and only then did I notice how the floor had filled up since the 7:30 curtain. Playing tunes from their 01te Hot Minutiz release, as well as

Joy position where they could play only their own songs, but the reality of the bar scene dictates that people want to hear recognizable songs.So how does a small band keep food on the table while trying to expose a new release? Please the crowd with decent covers while slipping in samples of their own material. Local band Namesake also blended a long set with covers and orginais, with more of the latter. This clean and tight trio offer a full sound with the thumb-slapping bassist and double-kick-a-holic drummer.The singer/guitarist complements the group by comfortably taking them through the set. Strong vocals are always an asset. Namesake’s naked vocals and bass, combined with incessant changes, creates a Firehose-meetsRush soundSometimes the changes seemed a little awkward and out of place, but the complexity of the music usually piqued interest. Like The Nuts, Namesake chose a wide range of cover songs, including Beastie Boys (always a crowd pleaser), Rush, Annie Lennox, Ozzy, and The Vapours. Namesake, however, should find other selections rather than impose their unusual style on those particular cover tunes because sometimes it just didn’t work (the Beasties were good though). Look for Namesake at the Atlas in the next couple of weeks. The next confirmed gig for The Nuts is at the Stray Cat in Harriston on March 21. You can pick up their recentlyreleased CD (locally recorded and produced) called “Unshaven” at many record stores.



classic Chili Pepper stuff, it wasn’t long before the pit dwellers were rising from the floor, surfing atop the hands, heads and shoulders of their peers. As security dragged body after body off the top and out of the show, the Chili Peppers steamrolled through “Suck My Kiss” and “Give it Away,” before getting into the newer stuff. ,4side from turning in a solid musical performance, the Challis did something that neither of the openers did: move around. Jumping in the air and swinging his hair around in a wicked spiral, Kiedis inspired dancing and moshing. As the tired crowd tried shamelessly to keep up with the band during songs like “Warped” and “Aeroplane,” they were rewarded with a break as the band played “Under the Bridge” to the breathless, Iighter-toting throng. eat your heart out! - Dave Navarro surveys the ‘Dome. Needless to say at Perry Farrell this point, ‘I heartily enjoyed the show, and from where In the past the Red Hot Chili gig, their popularity and success I sat it appeared as if I was not Peppers have proved themselves as will last longer than One Hot alone. a solid outfit and judging from this Minute.

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Friday, March 15, 1996

Something Hot in a Cold Country Echobelly w/The Impotent Sea Snakes Opera Huuse, Turunto Saturday March 9 by Ohad


Imprint staff


hink opening act. Then think women wearing thongs and electrical tape over their nipples. Think about one of these women whipping another in front Then think cross of a crucifix. dressing men wearing pink wigs, pink stockings, and fake breasts. Think about balloon tricks, and fire tricks, and cut-outs of Bill and Hillary Clinton on stage. Alice in Wonderland on the monitors. All under a huge Echobelly banner. Not typical, but then again, the Impotent Sea Snakes aren’t typical. Their music? Forgettable.

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Their stage act ? Hey, whatever gets you going. Actually, Echobelly didn’t exactly plan on having the Sea Snakes bore the over-bored crowd for however long it was they were on stage - the Sea Snakes were supposed to open for Fishbone at the Warehouse. When Fishbone cancelled, voiia. Give them credit though, after the lead singer ranted his goodnights, the guitarist, freshly back from a mid-song run through the crowd, yelled “And tick you if you can’t take a joke.” And then they were gone, naked girls and all. But I digress. The people were there to see Echobelly, and Echobelly didn’t disappoint. They played all the hits, including all of the big songs from their most recent recording effort,& For spare change, they threw in a few B-sides from their latest single, which may

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be available on this side of the pond, depending on when you read this and other intercontinental unseen forces. The performance was upbeat and entertaining. Lead singer Sonya Madan was energetic, smiling, and in good spirits. Her voice was strong, and while the band was solid, it was obvious who the star of the stage was [although the rhythm guitarist did have a throng going for a time]. Madan handled a would-be heckler with some of that quick yet strange Brit wit - “Fuck is a four letter word, so is dolt.” At least, I think that’s what she said. Doesn’t matter, the drunk Chris Cornell-look-a-like heckler shut up and let the band continue. What was nice [and a testament to the fact that Echobelly isn’t nearly as big a band as Oasis, Blur, or Elastica] was that I could stand fifteen feet from the stage without having to put up with a mosh pit, at least until “Car Fiction” came on. Even then, the pit was tame, for Echobelly doesn’t attract as many teeny-boppers as the above-mentioned B&poppers. And still, there was something slightly empty after the show. As good as the performance was, waiting in the mandatory coat check line [thank you Opera House! ] after the show, I was completely unaffected, and it didn’t seem like other people were very affected either. Perhaps Echobelly is simply a band to be consumed in the here and

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now, not to be cherished and remembered. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Empty consumption is what the Nineties are all about. Perhaps. Perhaps not.

Perhaps Echobelly is the deepest band since the Stone Roses, and I’m just missing it. But I don’t really care. Check them out anyway. TheyYe, uh, cool.

Hip Hop blowsup Fed1Hall Let the Funk FIow at Fed Hall Saturday March 16 by Bryce


special to Imprint


\ -- -

Get out the crusty

ip hop has never had a time to shine at the University of Waterloo. It has never had the opportunity to present itself as the unique and untouchable cultural art form that it is, and this is a tragedy. Actually, this INS a tragedy. It will all be behind us soon because on March 16, 1996, hip hop makes a triumphant return to Federation Hall. The key phrase for the event is “Let The Funk Flow”, and not only will the funk flow freely on Saturday, but many bombs will be dropped in the process. As a showcase for mad skiIls, this jam could, and probably will, be the event of the year. Features include the slick talents of the Caped Crusaders sound specialists (DJ Climaxxx and DJ Backbone) who will throw down the tightest hip hop show ever to be heard at Fed Hall, and the dominating roots flavour of the Bodyrock reggae crew of Toronto. And because of U W’s weak representation of hip hop in the past, this jam will come correct with a spotlight on Toronto’s Intricate dance squad, and as the name implies, these cats have crazy moves. You don’t want to sleep on this kids.

The University of Waterloo has, within its possession, the largest on-campus nightclub in North America. It’s been a long time since Fed has had line-ups down to the sidewalk like the old days of three years ago. What’s the problem? There’s nothing to move the crowd anymore. Wearing a pair of stfiined y _ - - _ * - -


J - - - - y

2nd a beer I - - -


- - - -

t-shirt _


- - - - -

is - -

fine for that Bomb Shelter joint, but what ever happened to style and elegance? Whatever happened to dress pants and tight skirts? It is no secret that UW has been rated one of the worst drest in Canada, an seem to embr; open arms. C Now en the thought, ofMarch 16, l if you will, as a -chance to change all of this one last time fnr -_-the ’ ___-_- --_ school year. Forget those damned jogging pants and baggy sweatshirts. Throw on some style and represent for the jam - of the school year ladies from all over will be coolin’ in the house, and the beats will be sick, so don’t be dumb. Check it out or suffer the consequences of hearing about it for the next month and a half.

It’s all so simple - “build it and they will come.” Come see the house that Soul Asylum built on March 16, and leave satisfied. Very satisfied. Peace.





Friday, March 15, 1996


Question: Whowrotethiscrap? Hellraiser 4 - Bloodline dim’ted by Kurin Yagher playing at Fairway by Greg Imprint


Picken staff

emember when you were fourteen, and sneaking in to

-ee an R rated cool? Especially horror

movie movies

was like

generations and four hundred years of such idiots. First a French aristocrat in the 18th century calls forth a demon. Then, after a while we flash forward to 1996, where the first demon summons Pinhead. Then, they torment a descendant of the guy who made the box, since he can make the box that undoes everything. In the end, the demons are sucked back into Hell and everything’s fine. Flash forward again to

Hcdlrui.stv- and ili’ighttmrc on Elm Strwt’.) Since 1turned, well, fifteen, 1 hadn’t seen ;1 horror flick on the big screen. That was, until last Tuesday. Driving down to the theatre at 7130, we decided to see the movie that started most recently before we arrived. That left two choices when we stepped up to the box office: Happy Gihlore and Hviiraiscv- 4. ffappy Gilmore was sold out, but there were still a few seats for Hellraiser. So, we decided what the hell and went to see Hellraiser. All I can say is whoops. We missed the first ten minutes or so, but apparently, that didn’t make a damn bit of difference. To complicate matters more, I hadn’t seen any of the three previous Hellraiser films, but was told that didn’t make a bit of difference either. What I soon witnessed made another thing apparThe father of Madonna’s child? ent: Hcllraiser 4 sucks. Ok, ifyou like blood andgore, the 22nd century, where a doctor without the constraints of say, a decent plot, then you’ll like on a space station again unleashes the monsters, because he thinks he Hrllraisvr 4: Bloodlines. There is can stop them once and for all. Was some tracing of a plot, but not much. The mysterious Lament he? You’ll have to see the movie to Configuration Box basically unfind out. No wait, that would defeat the leashes the demons of Hell into purpose of saying this film isn’t Earth, and every now and then, worth watching. Of course he does. some moron puts it to this task. In HeIlruiser 4, we just through three Overall, this is a piece of crap.

Not Union Theatre Waterloo presents Lullaby of Broadway directed by Burton Lancaster appearing at St. Jacob’s Schoolhouse, St. Jacob’s March 20-3 1

by Nigel special


Clarke to Imprint

espite having a large theatre in town with the Centre in the Square, Kitchener until two years ago had no professional theatre groupbased here in the city. None that is, until the start of the Union Theatre two years ago. Last year the group, organized by Burton Lancaster, staged a very Patsy successful production of Cline -- Sweet Dreams: the Fanfasy TNN. It sold fantastically, and this year it’s set to be repeated, along with two added shows this year, Nine Months from April lo2 1, and the soon-coming LuIIaby of Broadway, premiering this Wednesday. According to Lancaster, last year’s Patsy Cline show sold so we11 partly because of the small

It’s not even worth $4.25, let alone the normal $8.00. Ifyou ever needed a good reason not believe in Hell, this is it. Because of Hell, we get movies like this. Just once, I’d love to see God come down and smite these evil monsters from Hell. Y ah, like that’s ever going to happen. If anything can be complimented in this movie, it’s the special effects. Or at least they deserve marks for effort. There’s a lot ofblood and ripped open human bodies and the like. It’s not really gross or scary, just there. Pinhead looked cool the first time we saw him, you know in a previous movie, but he’s just unimpressive now. The leather fashions are quite nice however, perhaps the spring line from Gauthier. The sets look cheap, the lead actor seems like a low-budget-Rob-Lowe-JeanClaude-Van-Damme-type schmuck, the music is genericly boring and the film just fails to excite. Finally, when the credits rolled, it’s safe to say the movie only wrapped up, say, one part of the plot, leaving more threads unanswered than your average Shannon Tweed thriller. Then again, Shannon Tweed would have been quite good in this film. Anyone would have been. Since Clive Barker’s name appears on the poster, I would have to guess he had some involvement with it. I offer him the same advice I would give to Stephen King. Stop having anything to do with movies: write books.l,ord@‘lllusion sucked by all accounts,HeZfraiser 4 is miserable and Candyman: Farewell to the Flesh had a crapper of an ending. Please, just write stories.

Leaving on a work term soon? Imprint is available m on the Web at http://


rates CAL1

Tickets are $15 for adults, $8.50 for students/seniors phone the box office at 746-1484, or pick them up at Mavis Theatrical ‘Supplies, 46 Princess St. E., Waterloo the razzamatazz” of that most famous of roadways. It’s comprised of many songs from famous musicals that camped out in theatres there, and features songs from such

musicals as Guys and Dolls, Oklahoma, My Fair Lady, Oliver!, and many others. Basically it’s a revue of many of the songs that made Broadway famous. The actors are mainly drawn from the Toronto theatre community, Lancaster told Imprint, though priority is given to those there that are originally from the K-W area. Previous to this, Lancaster has initialized professional theatre companies in both Timmins and Charlottetown, both of which are still going today. Lancaster said that people initially may not have been of the opinion that K-W needed a professional theatre group. However, he’s found that upon seeing the work done by his group, they have become more appreciative of the work they do. Lancaster obviously is very excited about the upcoming theatre season, and the success of both Patsy Cline and also last year’s Nine Months (returning to town from across Canada for its April run) attest to great things to come. Buy 3 ticket, and enjoy.


8:30 a.m. to 7:00 p.m.


60 Ottawa




with your family.



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a Sleeper venue of Angie’s Kitchen, but also partly because there was a lot of interest created by word-of-mouth. We hopes for the same sort of interest in Lullaby of Broadway. The show sets out to give spectators ‘&a glimpse of the glitter and the glamour, the razzle dazzle and


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The Twist)


10 am. to 1:30 p.m.)



IMPRINT, Friday, March 15,1996

Moncton uatingUW



If you have your Graduation Portrait taken there will be NO SITTING FEE! for March & April To schedule your sitting, call





page 34

the concept that Eric’s Trip plays and moves as one in front of a crowd. The band has been nurturing their sound over countless releases for the last five or six years. Now, in 1996, that sound is completely volatile. The band can move you in more directions than a compass. If nothing else, Eric’s Trip proved a variety of musical points on this afternoon. Firstly, a little feedback doesn’t hurt. Secondly, in the hands of this band, distortion lends itself to melody. Last, but not least, music from the east coast doesn’t necessarily have much at all to do with fiddles. Eric’s Trip are an experience. If the rumours are true, you’d better catch them soon, before it’s too late.


n the aftermath that was the Sun day afternoon all ages show, several bands rocked just as hard as the day earlier. First up was Project 9, posing for this show as “Los C bolos.” Project 9 were prepared to frighten, and they came through. While their music didn’t necessarily turn our heads, it certainly turned those of the kids up front as they watched the masked bassist roam through and around them on the floor, playing as he went. Project 9 are heavy as hell. Maybe they’ve been there. It’s not that much of a longshot. The Shuttlecocks play the punk rock like no band I’ve ever seen. The Toronto band almost appear to be taken directly from the late 1970s. Opening with a cover of Fear’s “I love livin’ in the city,” they also added a Public Image Ltd. cover to their set, although The Shuttlecocks sounded more like the Sex Pistols than John Lydon could have ever intended. Fronted by three young women holding down the bass, guitar, and vocal responsibilities, The Shuttlecocks could probably have done better with an older Toronto trash-


rock crowd than the all ages crowd presented to them at Lee’s Palace. The audience seemed almost neutral towards them; The Shuttlecocks didn’t make any friends or enemies on this occasion. Winnipeg’s Bluebeard played an incredible set of fast, rambunctious songs of three and a half minutes or less. This band’s melodic bass and guitar driven style had heads and bodies bouncing throughout the venue, and deservedly so. Bluebeard have put together a compelling brand of music that they translate almost perfectly. They are one ofmost tightly fitting new bands to explode into Toronto in the last few months. If their recent barrage of shows in the city is evidence of what’s to come, music fans across Ontario will be hearing their name again very soon. Headlining the opening slot, Vancouver’s Pure held on for quite a ride. Playing only eight or nine songs, they covered all the hits during their short set. Timidly dancing through “Anna’s A Speed Freak,” “Lemonade” and “Denial,” lead singer Jordi Birch thrashed along on his own guitar until he snapped a string. The show continued without a hitch as a roadie quickly replaced it. Pure are the only ‘independent’ band one can think of that has roadies tuning and fixing guitars before and during their show. This fact didn’t steal from that show, however, as Pure pressed on through their songs with both ease and vigour. Last summer, The Hardship Post toured as a duo of guitarist Sebastian Lippa and bassist Mike Pick on drums. On Sunday, The Hardship Post took the stage with Alyson Macteod, former drummer from Jale, playing bass. The band opened with “Garbage Truck,” a song from their album Somebody Spoke, and continued with almost an entire set of new songs. In addition to playing bass,

Alyson proved that her voice could pair up with that of Sebastian’s quite nicely. It was this new found vocal harmony that seemed to create an entirely different sound for The Hardship Post. This new sound consisted of simple guitar lines matched with soothing vocal melodies. In an afternoon filled with distortion pedals and rock star mentalities, it wals nice to see that The Hardship Po,st just came to play. After sorting out a couple of technical difficulties, Elevator to Hell came to the front of the stage ready to play. The band consists of Rick White alnd Mark Gaudet from Eric’s Trip and Tara White from Orange Glass. While the members of Elevator to Hell look a lot like that of Eric’s Trip, lthe two bands are still distinguishable in sound, When compared to Eric’s Trip, Elevator to Hell tend to sound more mellow and even more excruciatingly haunting. For Rick White, Elevator to Hell provides an outlet for the songs that he has recorded by himself. Displaying his talent with a guitar and an organ, Rick melds the two with Tara’s bass absolutely brilliantly. Diving into “Roger and the hair” from thleir self titled vinyl LP, Rick and the gang soared through eleven song ofsonic heaven which included their take on a 1981 Robins song (yes, yet another Moncton band) that featured Mark’s lovely vocals. Elevator to Hell played songs from their first two seven inch singles, the previously mentioned LP and an upcoming ten song vinyl EP called Part Three. All of them eerie, all of them emotional. All of them straight from Rick’s heart. Elevator to Hell was the perfect finale for a loveiy assortment of bands. Maybe next year’s Canadian Music Week organizers should take notes from the line-ups at Lee’s Palace last weekend. lf they do, we’ll go for sure.

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by Pat Spacek Imprint


Especially if band with three of your girlvfln’rf=t / .- - -irh

sprite, I liked songs but oaly

tiends and you’re all saoo cute. Well, that’s

what’s been plaguing Plumtree and, in fact, probably got them their following. Now come on, can we say it’s really a horrible thing? If I was in a band touring across Canada with my friends, head1 ining a tour with Eric’s Trip’s Julie Doiran as the supportitlg act, I dun? think you’d hear me complaining. Not to say they have too many complaints, but I’m sure we all remember that

And it’s easy to re-

late to “Only In The Muvies” which, by the way, is one ofmy fitvourite songs on the album.

Most of us can reca’fl being night light.

“Hello!?! I’m become ing an adult, pieasetreat me that way” feeliqg. Plum~ee’s first full-lengllhalbum seems. to be an qttempt .W shake their old image. Their style

on MassExt~Fair&g is harder, slightly less ‘puppy’ and a fittle more ta the rockin” side, yet they ‘me

still super-perky and ti.

afraid to sleep at without a night Or we’d insist on having the dear open with the hall light on for fear of the boagey man under our bed or ti our closet, ar the other things that go bump in the night.

It’s sfower. the otiginal cvmbin;ttivn

The baa and,drums in sutig are gone, and the .of voice and a sin&

guitar give it m almost garagey feel. But it’s not exactly that, either.

You can hear room noise and


movement in the background. It’s

We’ve apparently hit that point in this decade where we can now look back on the essential music of the nineties. I’ve seen a commercial for Living in the Nineties, which offers the greatest hits of the decade. Of course, it fails to take note of three important musical genres: new country, rap and hiphop and alternative. It contains the greatest hit of the Divinyls, Right Said Fred, Gerardo, Vanilla Ice and less. By comparison, Absolute 90s is much better. Basically, Absolute 90s is the greatest hits of the alternative artists on MCA. You’ve likely seen the commercials on TV, since they’re running a big ad campaign on Muchmusic. It’s not great, but it’s not bad either.

The song selection on here is pretty good. The disc starts with Elastica’s “Connection,” one of the feel-good songs of last summer. Stone Roses follow up with “Love Spreads” and it goes on from there. Other artists featured include Weezer, the Gandharvas, White Zombie and the Lemonheads. Easily the most amusing track on the CD is “Detachable Penis” from King Missile. It’s so rarely heard anymore that it makes this disc worth owning. Curiously enough though, the “rare” Dinosaur Jr. track on this disc isn’t really that rare at all. It’s a cover of the Cure’s “Just Like Heaven” that was released by Dino Jr. years ago. This album is similar to to the Triple Scoop CD EMI put out late last year. The difference is that Triple Scoop was about ten bucks with five more tracks on it.. If you ever see Absolute 90s sitting in a discount bin, it might be worth picking up. Otherwise, it’s really not worth it.

by Greg Imprint


knew one verse, so1kept singing it uver and over with more emotion and enthusiasm each time X repeated it, It’s; ysung and silly, buf somehow it’s okay.

an indie

Picken staff

You can really see how they’re trying to ‘shed their cute& image in- the new, harder take of ‘*In the Sink,”

u&l the high-pitched backup vocats come in. They might not be able TVshake that image, at least fgr a, while, but then again, it wo&, so why kill a good thing?

by Pat Merlihm Imprint


Resident Alien is a magnificent album. There are a number of different aspects to the album that will definitely put Spacehog in the bestseller lists by the year end. The number one aspect of the album that will make Spacehog a “big” band is its radio friendliness. Radio play definitely gives bands a pretty good edge, and a number of potential singles here would break the band. The single “In the Meantime” is a promising start. It got them a warm up slot on The Red I-lot Chilli Peppers tour, and that’s only one song. Remember what radio did for Live, Hootie and the Blowfish, Weezer, Veruca Salt and the list goes on. Spacehog has that potential with Resident Alien. Another great thing going for


What it comes down to is either you love Skinny Puppy or else youjust don’t get it. Though unique in most respects, they are nevertheless one of those bands which tend to draw extreme reactions from people, and there really is no middle ground. The way 1 see it, either Puppy’s dark, dense, apocalyptic assault does strange and wonderful things to your imagination, or else you’re a mundane with no imagination at all. An incredibly biased outlook, but, well, there you go. Sadly, The Process has turned out to be Skinny Puppy’s final album. The 1992 move from Nettwerk to American Recordings ended up being a disastrous one, and label interference stretched the recording and mixing time to a whopping three years. Acerbating existing tensions between the band members, this period eventually ended up destroying Skinny Puppy; when keyboardist D. Rudolph Goettel died of a heroin overdose last year, the band was all but finished anyway. The ironic thing is that The Process, far from being a typically tired final album, actually sounds fresh and interesting. Clearly trying to move away from their old sound, and just as clearly unable to stop being Skinny Puppy, the band have created a more rhythmic, upbeat, even “musical” style that works more often than it doesn’t. There are actual songs here, complete with choruses, unprocessed vocals, and conventional instrumentation . ..a far cry from the toxic noise-of K0%ectVI and Lust Rites. And yet, strangely enough, it’s still a Skinny Puppy album. Enough of the band’s personality and techSpacehog is their image. They’ve fashioned themselves with “alternative wear” and copped a pretty good Johnny Rotten on “Space is the Place,” which incidently is a pretty good song. David Bowie seems to be another influence that is pretty apparent on “Starside,” and “Cruel to be Kind” but again, I

can’t complain “Ship Wrecked” can write ballads. comes across as

about the songs. proves the band Unfortunately, it an Axe1 Rose bal-

niques (most notably Dave Ogilvie’s masterful production) have remained to keep things from deteriorating into mainstream predictability. Skinny Puppy is still a nasty, vicious, jagged thing, and “poppy” Puppy may still be too much for most people. Mercifully, this is not “Modem Rock.” Does it all work? Well, to be frank, no. For one thing, Skinny Puppy had a good thing going, and such a radical deviation from their sound means, in some ways, that they’re from scratch, Experimentation, though much better and more interesting than complacency, makes for a somewhat uneven hit-or-miss final result. The fact that the:y hit a lot and miss infrequently mitigates this problem somewhat, but the best thing about older Skinny Puppy albums was their absolute perfection, so this rankles. Also, on previous releases, vocalist Nivek Ogre always sounded menacingly inhuman, a distorted voice shreiking about the end of the world. This time around, his attempts at songwriting (not his forte - he’s better at generating crazily evocative Dada poetry), along with less vocal processing, weaken a few of’ the tracks. Hearing him come up from hell to try a little singing is kind of disillusioning. Still, all of this is relative. The fact that the album is less effective than previous ones doesn’t mean that it’s not well worth buying. When it doesn’t work, it’s merely interesting...aind when it does work, it manages to open strange mental and emotional doors in the (appropriate) listener. Regardless of your feelings about them, Skinny Puppy were the best at what they did, and even a flawed Puppy album is better than most other bands’ masterpieces. In the end, that’s what the fans know and the detractors will never understand. I suggest you buy it and find out which one you really are. lad, but undoubtedly even that will help sell records. “Zeroes” is another example of good songsmithstry. The orchestration of guitar work between heavy grind sessions, and soft delicate melodies all come together nicely with the vocaIs which you’ll eat up as it spills from your speakers. Anotherlplus are the “who who who’s” and “oh oh oh’s” that will get played in clubs. “In The Meantime, ” “The Last Dictator,” and “Never Coming Down” fill those rolls perfectly. Everyone loves to sing along to those meaningless parts in the chorus, and for the most part are the only thing about a song that people remember. These guys have definitely done their research before putting out this product. Resident Alien is a solid album that I’m predicting will do very well for itself. If you 1ik;e their first single “In the Meantime,” more than likely you’ll take a IFancy to the rest of the album.


by Justin



Imprint staff Wow! Hard-hitting, fast-paced catchy punk-rock - how original! And from a band on Epitaph no less! Who would have thought... OK, so maybe Epitaph bands have a tendency to all sound the same. Gas Huffer, however, are an exception. They don’t sound like NQFX. They don’t sound like Bad Religion. They don’t sound like Offspring. They sound like Gas Huffer. What do they sound like? Imagine having Reverend Horton Heat on stage with the Cramps (with

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by Jeff


Imprint staff

WATERLOO’S NEWEST HOTSPOT! Don’t forget every Wednesdayand Thursday Nite vt/ehave live bands at Daddy 0’s. Call for info on who’s playing. NO COVER

I guess I’ve always liked these guys since I heard the song “Rockin’ is my Business” back in 199 1, even though 1 thought the rest of the alburn kinda sucked. Still, when I saw this album up for review, I thought, what the hell. I’m glad I did. Their sound is best described as old-fashioned eighties rock and roll with a bit of a country influence, but it’s lzot new country and it’s not alternative. I like it already. In a year where good albums have been scarce, this one is a welcome

by Patrick Wilkins



Imprint staff

Buy1 QuarterChicken! (white)anda beverage i and receive a l/41 n 19e I perwing chicken(dark) at noi I ‘extracharge I I Eatin ONLY

I Eatin or hke Uuf I I I

What the hell? This isn’tpunk! I mean, just look at this piece of shit. . . The Grey Race. Not even a cool title. Especially not a cool package. Just a bunch of black and white pictures of people’s faces - not a single picture of ungulateraunching or dirty city streets. Bad Religion. Look at those corporate sell-outs. Where’s the spiked hair? Where’s the dog collar and leather studs? Punk is about image. Don’t they understand? God, they look at least thirty. That’s old. What can an old guy born in thesixties possibly know about punk? Check out these lyrics, too. There’s barely any swearing. How can you have a punk song without cussing? It’s necessary. What the hell’s he talking about anyway? “You spout rhetoric nonsense like a Pavlovian model responding to his questions.” That’s notpunk lyrics. Punk isn’t about big words and complex phrases. Punk is ‘tick the rich.’ Fuck the government. Fuck you. That’s punk.

whom Gas Huffer toured in late 1994), add a little bit of 70’s style punk and you’ve got it. The lyrics, as is usually the case with punk lyrics, are a little unintelligible. That’s not to say that they’re unintelligent. I’m sure I heard references to Aristotle in the first song. Of course, that doesn’t really mean the lyrics are intelligent either. A couple of the song titles include “Double-OBum” and “Numbnuts Cold.” Draw your own conclusions from that. This is definitely not one of the more commercial sounding albums that Epitaph has put out. If you like bands Offspring and all their clones,

Frida;y, March l&l996

you probably won’t like this album. If you like punk music (note that this does NOT include Offspring) then you definitely need some Gas Huffer in your collection.

breath of fresh air. With new rock alternative being so big these days, it’s good to once in a while kick back and remember what rock and roll used to be like before we got to university and were subjected to the crap that is so predominant here. I have a new respect for rock and roll music. Most of their songs are about rock and roll, getting drunk, and women. Simple, yet it still works, Best of all, they aren’t too serious. There’s a touch of good humour in nearly every song, and they don’t overdo it. They also have a bit ofan attitude. A good lead-off track is a must for every album and “Still Alive And Well” is a great one. Also noteworthy is “Song For Absent Friends,” a tribute to their former colleague Ken “Dimwit” Montgomery who died last year at

age 3 8, whose “glasses will always be full.” “Back In Business Again,” somewhat ofa sequel to “Rockin’ is my Business,” really kicks ass, just to let everybody know that they are back. The best track was probably “Hit The Road,” a little jam session, presumably about an ex-girlfriend, or, more tlittingly perhaps, an ex-groupie. The album has a nice mix to it, and stays solid throughout. I was never a fan of rock and roll before, and while this album won’t convert me, it is a great reminder of what rock and roll used to be like when we were growing up. Classic rock fans may want to pick up this CD, a quality production from a talented Ontario band (yes, there IS such a thing.) The Four Horsemen are definitely back in business.

Maybe these guys think they’re punk, but really, they’re not. There’s even this song called “Punk Rock Song.” So let’s get down to some shit-kicking, right? Wrong. This asshole starts singing about “a hundred thousand people being killed for their bread,” and “the party conventions and the real politik.” That’s not punk. That’s po1iriu.s. What doespolitics have to do with anything? What is this songwriter guy, some kind of fruitcake?

play guitar. But these guys have three guitars;, a drum, and a vocal guy, and they’re all goddamn showoffs. Way too much sound. Way more than three chords per song. If the Sex Pistols couldn’t play their instruments, why should anybody else? And iYtc Grey Race is way overproduced. Everything sounds clear and really tight, When I start my punk band, we’re only gonna put stuff out on tape. I)ucl tape. That’s punk! And someone told me this is Bad Religion’s ninth album. Like, give it 141 already, guys. No red punk would ever want to listen to your shit if all you do is play complicated songs and sing about politics and hunger and overpopulation. If 1 wanted poetry I’d steal a book from the library and get someone to read it to me. Drop the two extra guitar players. Stop being so highand-mighty about being able to play your instruments. Get rid of all the stupid pictures of faces on the inside I_ they all look the same anyway, what’s the point? Dye your hair. Like Billie Jo. Now

The music’s kinda punk. 1 mean, it sounds punk, alright. If you like the Offspring, you might like this CD because Bad Religion sound almost as punk as the Offspring. But it’s way too musical, if you know what I mean. Punk shouldn’t be about being able to



Motherfuckers. “Someone cried out ‘fuck the government’ / His mates couldn’t define whal: he meant i So no one gave him the time of day / And the scene died away.” -- “Empty Causes,” Bad Religion, T/w Grey Ruce.

IMPRINT, Fridav, March 15, 1996

by Sara Manning special to Imprint What? There is a music scene in Samia? Why of course there is, as Zero well proves. Of course many of the groups featured on Zero are made up of the same members (Belo, Latabom for example), but this fact just makes the amount of musical variety on Zero all the more surprising. Zero is an independent compilation of experimental, industrial, ambient and gaIt’s an odd sounding rage punk music. combination, yet it proves to be an interesting and entertaining listen. After an entertaining introduction, Zero

starts off strong with Latabom’s “Hypnotized .” The catchy industrial style sound of Belo’s “Not a Song” might appeal to a wider majority of listeners. The last song on the album “Mesmerized,” by Latabom, is great for fans of ambient type music, but goes on a bit too long for my liking. Another song for the ambient music fan is ABA Structures “Scrambling to Stay Ahead.” I personally loved the punkish garage sound of the short and bitterly humorous “My Goth Chick Left Me for a Skinhead,” by Beetle. Zero is a good sample of many different independent artists experimenting in a variety of sounds and musical styles. It’s a good opportunity to hear new bands you may wish to listen more to. If you’d like a copy, contact NoDrummer Music through Beetle (Justin Mathews) jmathews@undergrad.math.

- -

Once again, the genius of Sean “Puffy” Combs has produced yet another dope piece of the Bad Boy jigsaw puzzle. Biggie Smalls rolled his fat ass through first, followed by Craig Mack who slurred his way to hip hop status. Junior M.A.F.I.A. then blew up with ease while Faith pouted her way onto the charts with her over-processed blond lid. And somewhere in between came Total the original Bad Girls. With their debut bomb “Can’t You See,” featuring the Notorious One, Total has emerged as one of the tightest R&B forces to be reckoned with in an increasing jungle of played-out female crews striving for props and cream. So what separates Kima, Pam, and Keisha from the likes of SWV, TLC, Jade, Mokenstef, Blackgirl, or Xscape? It’s all about the style. To be an element of the Bad Boy clique means dark shades, leather, crushed linens, phat rides, and on the technical side, flawless production and crisp videos. Yes, other groups have some of this, but they can’t represent like Total does. They just can’t pull it off. Let’s talk about musical content. Can Total hold their own? No question. The second release from this much-anticipated album, “No One Else” is ultra-smooth and can truly move a crowd of R&B lovers. This is, without a doubt, their dopest joint. Featuring a cameo from Da Brat, fresh beats, and a nice bounce, this track really establishes the Total style and sets them apart from the masses of sex-starved female perpetrators. Be prepared to skip the interlude “Whose ts It?” unless you like the sounds of some sucker-duck brother licking the jewels of Keisha, who, while slapping his ass, de-

mands to know “whose is it?” Nice, but I’d rather chill out to “Kissin’ You,” a sweet slow jam for those days when you just want to grip up your partner and kiss them up just because you have two lips. “Do You Think About Us” is a mellow track with a lot of potential that wasn’t used, but I guess even Puff Daddy can’t win them all. The rest of the album is solid and composed of quality beats and sensual lyrics. “Love Is All We Need” excels, and “When Boy Meets Girl” can hold its own anywhere. There’s also a bonus track of “No One Else (Puff Daddy Remix).” The lyrics are rewritten, the bass is deep, and the vibe flows smooth like bacon grease down a kitchen drain. If you’re down with the Bad Boy philosophy, this is a vital weapon in the untouchable East Coast R&B arsenal. It’s all about the T&al package. Now, about the soundtrack Don’t Be A Menace To South Central While Drinking Your Juice In The Hood. The movie may be jokes, but the soundtrack is a real nice package. With a wide spectrum of styles on this project, it makes a dope mix. On the harder side, Wu-Tang represents with “Winter Warz,” Erick Sermon’s talents are displayed in “Maintain,” while “Live Wires Connect” comes courtesy of Keith Murray and Lord Jamar, and Mobb Deep hits hard with “Up North Trip.” Smoothness comes from Mona Lisa’s debut “Can’t Be Wasting My Time,” and Jodeci’s infamous harmony is pleasing to the ear in “Give It Up.” Other crisp new vibes include “Renee” from the Lost Boyz, “Time To Shine” by L’il Kim (Junior M.A.F.I.A.), “Freak it Out” by Doug E. Fresh, and “We Got More” from Shock G with the Luniz. One of the best slow jams I have heard in a while in on this album also. Performed by Joe, “All The Things Your Man Won’t Do” is the real gem in this pile of gold. Complimenting this track is R. Kelly’s “Tempo Slow,” and “Let’s Lay Together” from the Isley Brothers. This soundtrack is a good compilation for those who are looking for a diverse hip hop record. I don’t plan to see the movie anytime soon, but this album will satisfy my need for some new beats from established artists, and fresh joints from some new faces.

- - - -

1 was 1i:king it up until she spoke. ‘There’s something about her voice that just sounds unpleasant. I’m not sure what it is. It’s not that she’s off key she’s not. It’s not the Japanese accent - that sounds refreshing. I think her voice just doesn’t suit this style of music. Some bands work around such deficiencies by using lots of effects. That’s what Cibo Mat-to did on the one song where the vocalist isn’t annoying: “Birthday Cake.” The distorted vocals

by Justin Imprint

by Edward Richards Imprint staff



Mathews staff

This is another one of those CDs by a band that I’d never heard of before, but they had an eye-catching cover that made me curious. What does a band that has some sort of Amazonian goddess on its cover sound like? Well, they were not what I expected (though I can’t really describe what I expected). The disk opens with a really mellow, ambient wash of keyboards with some unidentifiable samples of voices in the background. In comes a fir&y trip-hop beat that, though a little over-produced sounding, is quite easy to get into and somewhat soothing.

However, all the effects in the studio can’t change the fact that the Iyrics are just stupid. “Birthday Cake” has the catchy little refrain of “Extra Sugar, extra salt, extra oil and MSG..” Then of course, we have the wisdom of ‘Know Your Chicken”: “I know my chicken, you got to know your chicken.” Once you get past the vocals, and consequently the lyrics, this is actually quite a good album. The music is very well done, ranging from trip-hop to industrial dance to jazz. Unfortunately, there are no instrumental songs on P’iva! La Woman, so you’ll have to put up with a singer that’s difficult to listen to hear the really cool music that goes with it. There is a bonus at the end of the last song. I guess it’s the singer’s way of making up for her voice. I’ve never heard a better thigh tapping solo than this one. It almost makes the album worth getting.



by Pat


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Kids was a pretty unsettling movie to watch, but the soundtrack is mindblowing. It’s success can be attributed to The Folk Lmplosion who made a hefty contribution with great singles, that, surprisingly, made radio play. Lou Barlow and John Davis team up as The Folk Implosion and tend to release their singles or albums on obscure labels making them a bit hard to find. Of course with the success of Kids, The Folk Implosion may even gamer a slot in the local record stores (but don’t hold your breath.) The electric idiot ep isn’t exactly new, but more than likely you’ve never heard any of it before. The ep is a se ven song collection of 7 ” singles re-

by Sara Manning special to Imprint

19% Mazda MX-6 Mystbe By special arrangement with a chartered Canadian bank, we can put you into a new Mazda before you graduate. If you have a job waiting for you upon graduating, give us a call or stop by our showroom for details on this exclusive offer for graduates.

I picked up At the Gates thinking that I might like metal if 1 gave it a try. It is always difficult to judge a music style that you are not use to. It’s hard to know what to listen for in the music! This is the difficulty I ran into listening to the hard

atedoo a!!TH mazDa



7464 666


115 Northfield Waterloo

Dr., W.,

(Northfieldat the Parkway)

by Pat&k Imprint

Wilkins staff

“I’ve never been this far north before, The trees are getting small and bent. I have this feeling that a whole new set of rules apply here.” - “Roadkill” Forgive a bit of personal digression. I come from the tiny, remote Northwestern Ontario town of Sioux Lookout.Theprimaryoccupation of everyone under fifty (the primary occupation of everyone over fifty being, of course, bingo), is getting piss drunk, falling down, puking, and bragging about it. There is no live music apart from the occasional shitty cover band in one of the town’s dozen bars (with names like The Biggest Little Hanky Tonk). For several years our mayor was Lawrence Martin, country music singer and winner of a token commercial Juno award. Which is why I like Steve Howard. Howard grew up in the notihern town of South Porcupine, Ontario. He was a member of several cover bands in his time, playing tunes by AC/DC and Judas Priest to prostrate pukers. And, obviously, he’s heard his share of

IMPRINT, Frid.ay, March 15,1996 leased in ‘94 and ‘95 and believe me they’re hard to find. Being a bit of a Lou Barlow fan has been a burden to my pocketbook, but I haven’t been disappointed with anything that he’s put out so far. The Folk Implosion material is no exception. It’s fuzzy, it’s short, it’s catchy, it’s simple

you laid. In fact, the music is best to be enjoyed by yourself so you won’t be bothered by comments like “what”s that noise you’re listening to?“’ or “turn that crap off!” Yes, even 1 recognize that The Folk Implosion isn’t for everyone. Kids was an exceptional album in that it had much more production tar it than a traditional recording, like the ones you’ll find on the electric idiot ep. The songs are thle genuine article with bare bones recording on a fcrur-track cassette and recorded - Folk Implosion style - at John’s house. If you’re cynical enough to believe that they’ve created the effect that you’re listening to someone’s demo tape - to get that indie credibility that is so000 important to some people - than you’re probably just way too cool for th[ese guys.

and yet it continues to blow mind. No, these songs won’t

my get

Go buy yourself a slickly mixed Metallica CD if you want slick sounds. If you like 104, well, you probably already know about The Folk Implosion.

grinding guitar and drums of At The Gates’ Slaughter of the Soul. To my unaccustomed ear almost every song sounded the same, and it all sounded like Metallica. I really wished the vocalists voice was deeper and less screechy. At the Gates “Into the Dead Sky” and “The Flames of the End” really stood out strongly from the rest of the album in that they were both instrumentals and their relative quietness contrasted sharply against the hard angry sound of the rest of the album, giving the lis-

tener a bit of a rest, and creating an interesting affect. At the Gates not only seem to play their instruments well, but they include samples of sounds, such as a gun loading and white noise adding more to their songs. It is an album of dark lyrics and strong anger for the state of humanity. I found that the more I listened to the album, the more 1 was able to distinguishL betweendifferent songs. I still don’t like metal, but I think fans of heavy metal may find this an interesting album.

honky tank. His debut CD Folks Like Me shows elements of the entire northern experience. Written in South Porcupine, Ontario, and recorded in Kitchener’s Threshold studio, Folks Like Me is an album with enough soul that it almost makes me want to go back to Sioux Lookout. According to the liner notes, the first song Howard wrote was “Hooterville,” a song about drinking, smoking, and picking up ‘some.’ Like many of the songs on

Mayor? IPerhaps. But despite Howard’s country influences and vocals with the occasional threeoctave, this sure as hell ain’t country. FoIh Like Me is a fireside album, the music of crisp September nights gathered around a campfire, passing down a guitar and a bottle of Johnny Walker. “Play us something, Steve.” So Steve plays “The Mosquito Song,” a silly little tune that ranks up there with “The Blackfly Song” as evidence of the Canadian stoicism against the smaller and more painful elements of nature. No matter how well it is produced, whatever keyboards, strings, and horns Howard accompanies himself with, the songs on this album may a11 be stripped down to the barest campfire essentials. There are a lot of true stories here, about joblessness, hitchhiking, love, mortality, and even, yes, drinking beer, getting drunk and falling down. It’s a sincere effort, rowdy and alcoholic at times, but also quiet and revealing on songs like “Latest Inspiration” and “Now That I’m Gone.” You don’t have to be from northern Ontario to appreciate Steve Howard. It helps, of course. Anyone who’s experienced life in the north will recognize the spirit behind Folks Like Me. But if your entire life: has been spent below the forty-sixth parallel, there’s an empty spot in your soul that Steve Howard can fill.

FbZks Like Me, “Hooterville” incorporates a rocking bar blues sound with a simple country rhythm. Country rhythm? The scourge of the musical world? Has my DNA been so twisted by exposure to severe cold that I no longer cringe at the mere association of Wynonna, Shania, and Lawrence the Singin’

Classified Deadline : Monday 5 p-m. SLC 1116


Summer Business: Are you an ent repeneur? Great opportunity with low start-up cost, management training, earn up to $80Cl/week, vehicle required. Call Greenland Irrigation l-800361-4074. Experience the Fun Life! Be your own boss In Grand Bend this summer. Retail booths available for food, clothing, rentals or pizza location (oven included). Student Venture loans available. From $395. per month. Call London 4734084 or 657-5532 evenings. Window Cleaning: full-time summer, part-timenow, $9..hour, ladderexperien ce prefered. Fax handwritten resume and any relevant information to 8936829. Internet -Teach Conversational English year round, short term or for summer in Japan, Hong Kong, Singapore, Taiwan, Korea. Excellent pay. No expenence or qualifications needed. For free details on living/working conditions, how you can apply, job directories, etc., see or pick up our free brochure at the Imprint Off Ice or the Turnkey Desk. Asia Facts Unllmrted, P.O. 80x 93, Kingston, Ontario, K7L 4V6.

SPECIAL: Incredible signing bonus In effect! 3 and 5 bedroom house, groups of 4 or 5, May 1996 to April 1997 lease, well kept, laundry and parking. Call James/Mark 574-2064 ; Pager 2412985. Townhouse for rent - 5 large bedrooms, very clean and spacious, parking. laundry, great for 5-7 people, excellent landlord, 8 minute walk to UW. $1,590 00 plus hydro, available May 1. 699-5013. Summer sublet - 3 bedroom, semifurnished, split-level apartment for sublet. Convenient for students attending UW and Wilfred Laurier. $290./month, or best offer. For more information call 746-9218. Available Sept. ‘96 - 5 bedroom house, Lakeshore area, quiet location, garage, parking, huge family room, $1,295./ month. Summer negotiable if needed. 725-8772 or 880-7377. House for rent - good neighbourhood, 6 bedroom older home with air-conditioning, substantial discount for summer. Please call Pam 725-4211. Available Sept. ‘96 - 5 bedroom house with great uptown Waterloo location, parking for 4, 1 year lease, $I ,295./ month. 570-2640 or 008-7377. House for rent - 243 He&lock Street, 5 bedroom house, 4 bedrooms available, 1 minute from WLU 10 minutes from UW, laundry facilities avaitable, 12 or 16 month lease from May 1. $325.00 plus utilities.

Phillip Street townhouses-available May 1 - fridge & stove, washer & dryer, parking included. 2 & 3 bedroom units. Apply unit 54-256 Phillip Street, telephone 746-5761.

Get your reports, cases, and essays professlonally desktop published for belter marks! Free pickup and delivery. $1 50/250 words. Save this phone number and call Jennifer at 746-5069 for your next assignment Typing and graphic service. Term papers, repot-t figures resumes, etc. Colour printer. 745-9653 anytime. Editing, word processing and desktop publishing by experienced freelance writer and language teacher. Student rates. Call Yoke at 748-2838.

Positive alternatives for health & spiritual growth. Release painful negative emotions, heal physical illnesses and transform them to a positive natural state. Call Janet/Kevin Fitzgerald 746-9081 I


software for windows Fractal Design Painter 3 - brand new, includes user guide, Version 3.1 Addendum, 7 disks and extra CD’s. $500. value, best offer. Call Maa at 885-2723. Apple II CX computer, 8MB of ram, 40Mf3 hard drive, colour monitor and ClarisWorks software. $1,100. Call 7258440. Tandy 1000 SX computer, DMP 13OA dot-matrix printer (no hard drive). Best offer. Call 888-6526 after 7:00 p.m. Simulated oak computer workstation. Best offer. Call 888-6526 after 7:00 p.m.


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House wanted for - summer months: young married couple looking to sublet small house with yard. Please leave a message 579-9147.

African Pygmy Hedgehogs - adorable pets, hypoallergenic, odorless, very low maintenance costs. The exotic pet for the 90s - $90.00. Call Jim at 888-8621.

MARCH 20,1996

Coming Out Discussion Group explores issues in sexual orientation. Topic: Talking About Safer Sex and Related Issues. 7:30 p.m., ML1 04. Information: 884-4569. Lesbians, gay men, bisexuals, transgendered people and those questioning their sexuality are welcome. Free noon concert at Conrad Grebel College Chapel at l2:30 p.m. Percussion & Piano: Terry Kroetsch, Carol Bauman. Career opportunity meeting at 7 p.m. See announcements for details. RSVP please (5 19) 884-4975 Waterloo Blood Donor Clinic - First United Church, King & William Sts. from 1:30 to 8:00 p.m.


for the Workplace: 18, 11:30 - 12:30, NH 1020.



Plan Assessment: March 18, 12:30 - 2:30, NH 1020.




Outers Club meets every Monday ex-

cept University holida s and Inter-term breaks. 7 p.m. in M 8 4040. Contact Fabrice Jaubert, ext. 4655 or fiaubert8 cql. EVERY TUESDAY To become a better public s eaker, read in public and build your con PIdence, ‘oin the Christopher LeadershipCourse. f his course be ins March 19 to May 28, 1996from 7 to 9 0 p.m. Students $90.00 (books included), adults$l 10. For more info call Lolita Nechacov at (519) 5763877. EVERY WEDNESDAY Gay and Lesbian Liberation of Waterloo sponsors GLLOWNight, a social evenina. 9 o.m. ML 104. Meet old friends and mgke ‘new ones. All welcome. Waterloo Science Fiction Club (WatSFiC) meetinq 7:00 p.m. in SLC 2135, Student Life iSentre,‘UW. Bnn a board or card games to play afterwar Els. See uw.clubs.watsfic or mail wat.sfic@calum.csclub.uwaterloo.cafor details.

Certificate Program in teaching English as a second language at The Waterloo Centre for Applied Linguistics Inc. For info call (519) 7259070. Transportation to the Vineyard. Free shuttle available every Sunday from U of W to the Kitchener Vineyard’s meetings at the Concordia Club. For a ride, call Sandi at 579-8463 before Ftidav noon. Those interested in a career as a Certified Management Accountant are invited to attend to atalk by Joseph Palumb on Tuesdav. March 26 in NH 1020 from 3:30 - 530. shoulders or back? Cost of maSSage by professional therapist is covered by UW’s health plan. Reduce tension from studying, call Cameron Moffatl at 747Support the Bowlerama Fundraiser for the benefit of the French and Mahalfy families in coping with financial realities of their tragedy, on Sat., March 16. For more info call Danny DeFrancesco (416) 421-22-I 1 or Talk &IO Radio, Debbie Dixon, (416) 221-

6400. Attention Bluevale Alumni! BCl’s 25th Reunion is May X)-June 1,1997. If you are interested in attendinq, please contact the Reunion Hotline at 6a&69. Recycle your phone books. 1996 telephone books will be delivered during late Februarv and earlv March. Homer Watson House & Gallery raffle! “My Mother Bids Me Comb My Haif’ pastel by Diano Philpott. Draw on May 12. Call 748477 for more info. K-W’s new professionaltheatre company, Union Theatre Waterloo iaunches i&i second season with “Lullaby of Broadway” April 1021 .OnMay l-19comesee”PatsyClineSweet Dreams: The Fantasy Tour”. For info call 746-I 484. The Game - do you like mind games & cryptograms? Win afreedinnerat Ali Baba’s! Gather a team Saturday, March 23. E-mail mathsc&?undergrad.math.uwaterlcu.caor call Jared 888-4779. ii bursary is offered for 1 year of postgraduate study to residents of the Municipality of Waterioo or students studying at UW or WLU. Approximate value: $3,500. Application deadline: April 15,19X. For info call905-52%9537ortheGraduateofficesat the above universities. Libana in concert Sundav, Mav 5,1996 at 3 p.m. at St. John’so&the&Ii United Church, Cambridge. This seven women ensem bte capture world rh ythems and harmonies through song, dance and instruments in music. Tickets $15.00 info 836-

The TOEFL Preparation Course will begir 1 on April 2 and end June 5. Classes are held every Tuesday and Wednesday from 2430 p.m. for 10 weeks. The course fee is $50. and the book “Building Skills for the TOEFL” is $32. Register at the International Student Office, NH2080 or call Darlene Ryan ext. 2814 for more info,. Performers wanted for the 2nd Annual Sounds of Spring Coffeehouse on the afternoon of Thursday, March 28 in the SLC. Register at the Turnkey Desk or call 1X384434.







CUSO Slide/Video presentation: 4:30 to 530 p.m., Wed., March 27, rcom 1020, NH.CUSOprovidesoverseasworkopportunities in developing countries. for more info call 51 g-767-2654. The Region of Waterloo’s Waste Reduction Offike is sponsoring a oneday seminar and trade show on Wednesday, March 27 from 8 a.m. to 530 p.m. at Bingemans Conference Centre in Kitchener. Call 8835150, ext. 231. Cam opportunilyi - a unique home based business. Experience your free dot-n. Positive, success focussed, selfdevelopment IV Network. Growing faster tizdy7;! Income white you sleep. (519)


The City of Waterloo, Volunteer Setvices is currently recruiting for the following volunteer positions:

E-mail sdrncurry@cousteau or call tarry Lamb at ext. 2464 for more info.

Needed: Volunteer ComputerTutor: volunteers are needed to tutor senior parlicipants of our Computer Literacy Interest Pilot Project (CLIPP). Advanced knowledge of Windows applications is required. A time commitment of 4 flexible hours per week is required. Needed: Income Tax Volunteer: votunteers are needed to complete income tax forms for seniors. A commitment of 4 sessions which are 3 hours in length is required. Volunteer Driver: Do you have a car and some free time? A volunteer driver is needed to drive seniors from their home to a senior day program. Xme commitment wouldbeFfiday9:3U-10:15a.m.and3:30400 p.m. Mileage is reimbursed. For information please call: Volunteer Services, City of Watefloo, 888+X88. Needed Volunteer Baby-sitter: Volunteers are needed to assist with a children’s playgroup heldonThursdaymomings93CI - 11:30 am. Responsibilities include reading stories, creative movement and playing with children. Must have previous experience working with preschoolers.

Needed Volunteer


Do you

enjoy shopping and helping those in need? This shopping program is to assist older adults unable to dotheirown grocery shopping and have no other means of purchasing groceries and deliver groceries.

VdunteerKitchenAssistant:areneeded to assist with a senior lunch program every Wednesday or Friday 8:3O - 130. Duties include peeling potatoes, setting tables, serving meals, cleaning up tables and dishes. Aquatic Volunteers: are needed to assist with Red Cross swimming classes. Volunteersmust havecompleted RLSSC Bronze Medallion and be at least 14 years of age. Learn about a different cuhure white you show a new immigrant how to be part of your community. For more information call the K-W YMCA Host Program at 5799622. Do you like leisure and recreation? Become a Leisure Support Volunteer. Pr* vide assistance to a person with adisability for swimming, senior’s programs, minor sports or community programs. Want to get wet? Male volunteer sought to aid a gentleman with a physical disability Swimming once/week-evenings. Swimming anybody? Male volunteer sought to help teenage male with a disabiliiy at Rec. Centre once/week, days or evenings. Male volunteer sought for gentleman with disability, wishing to shoot pool/billiards. For more information call Kris at 74 t-2226. Be a Big Sister Volunteer. If you are 20 or older and feel you can make a positive difference in a child’s life, K-W and area Big Sisters needs you. Female volunteers are required to develop relationships with girts (aged4-17)andboys(aged4-11). Youare required to provide 3 hours a week for a minimum of one year. We are also in need of Big Sisters from a Jamaican, African and Latin American decent. Please call 7435206 for more information. International Students Need Enqlish Tutors. Volunteers are needed to iutor international students in oral and written English on a one-to-one basis. Tutor meets international students on campus for l-2 hours, usually once a week for one term. If you have a &xi working knowtedge of English, are patient, friendly, dependable, and would like to volunteer, register at the IntemationaI Student mice, NH 2080, or call Darlene Ryan, ed. 2814 for more

Do your thing for the Iml environment. GREENBACKSrecyclesnon-btueboxplastics. We need your h&p once a month for 2 hours. Next recycling Saturday, March 23/ 96. Please call Greenbacks at 7250293 to join in. ROOF, an agency working with street youth is looking for dependable, empihetic and open-minded volunteers. ROOF provides excellent leamir:g opportunities in group work, outreach and crisis intervention. We required both day and evening time and ask foraonce awe&, eight month commiltment. (flexible for students that leave during summer months) Please call Patti at 742-2788. The Domqc Garden Committee needs YOU! VolunteelX are needed to plant, organize and fundraise for the new “Northern Ontario Garden”.

Soccercoaches&assistantsareneecled for teams in ali age groups. For more info about these volunteer positions, please call Waterloo Minor Soccer at 578-9680.

* Chaos * Waterloo Taxi * Onward Comptuers * Fairview Acura * Picture Yourself * Princess Cinema * Gino’s Pizza * Blue Dog Bagels * Dr. Disc * The 8eat Goes On * UW Federation of Students * Data Corn Computers * Vision Computers * Bent * Cl0 * Forbes Studio * Daddy O’s + Microsoft * A-l Storage * Travel Cuts * Kidney Foundation * Waterloo Bowling Lanes * Ani Defranco (Michael Grit) * JWG Associates Inc. * Shot In The Dark * Waterloo North Mazda * M & M Bicycles * Club Abstract

Health Canada advises that smoking is addictive and causes lung cancer, emphysema and heart disease.


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