holiday issue • getting festive in the D pg.16 • local gift guide pg.12-15 • budgeting tips pg.14
Out of the studio on to the ice in his new book The Lonely End of the Rink
The war for Ward 7 11 candidates 2 front runners no clear winner
deC. 04, 2013 vOL. 01 ISSUe 01 UrBAnITeneWS.COm
vIeWS WELCOME TO
THE URBANITE » URBANITENEWS.COM » DEC. 4, 2013 » 3
THE THE URBANITE TOTALITY OF RECALL
Thank you for picking up a copy of the Urbanite, Windsor’s latest community newspaper. The Urbanite brings a fresh, energetic voice to Windsor media; covering the new, arts and culture stories that often go unreported. Providing original, independent reporting, the Urbanite is your source for city life, hidden gems from the county and new experiences in Detroit. Having spent much of my life in Windsor, I feel there are no shortage of stories to tell. We are excited to provide Windsorites with news in the way they choose to engage with, whether it be in print, online or interactively through emerging technologies. The Urbanites aims to be at the forefront of the changes affecting journalism. We’re not a glossy magazine, and we’re not pretending to be. But we are going to support what’s going in the city by showcasing Windsorites that are working hard and doing interesting things. Comment, share, engage. To know your city is to love it. Join us in exploring what our city has to offer.
— NATASHA MARAR
Perhaps we are just too damn polite up here to ask someone to leave when they’ve overstayed their welcome. If you look at the ways that politicians both enter and leave office in Canada, since 1867, there have been few situations which warranted even the thought of removing somebody from office before the completion of their term. Traditionally, when a political scandal got to the point of bringing embarrassment to the politician, the office itself or the government as a whole, the embattled elected official did the most honourable thing in a dishonourable situation— put constituents before personal aspirations and stepped aside. And for the most part, this system worked. Politicians have stepped aside and ran in either byelections or subsequent elections, and residents were able to determine whether or not the politician was still fit for office post-scandal. However, there are times when politicians perform such grandiose missteps that citizens begin to contemplate politics absent of the offender. Toronto mayor (in title only) Rob Ford has seen his powers greatly diminished by his fellow city council members as a result of his seemingly never ending follies which need not be discussed here. His colleagues voted to allocate any non-statutory powers to the deputy mayor and greatly reduced his office budget. Closer to home, last year Windsor city council members voted to hit Ward 10 councilor Al Maghnieh with the maximum penalty allowed by The Municipal Act— a 90-day dock of pay and removal
Publisher/Editor: Natasha Marar (firstname.lastname@example.org) Managing Editor: Jon Liedtke (email@example.com) Art Director: Stephen Hargreaves Circulation: Kirk Guthrie Contributors: Adam D’Andrea, Elise Keller, Jenn McMullan, Dan Savage, Jay Verspeelt
from all municipal agencies, boards and committees— for misusing a library credit card issued by former Windsor Public Library CEO Barry Holmes (who has since seemingly skipped town following revelations of his own misuse of taxpayer dollars). While civics is taught for half a semester in Ontario high schools and is indeed mandated by provincial curriculum, many Windsorites (in Al Maghnieh’s case) and Torontonians, Ontarians and Canadians alike (in Rob Ford’s case), were shocked and appalled to learn that a mechanism to remove elected officials was not already enacted in legislation. In 1995, following a referendum which garnered 80 per cent popular approval, British Columbia enacted recall legislation and citizens’ initiatives (a petition supported by a minimum number of voters to trigger a vote on an issue). Both pieces of legislation were rooted deeply in progressivism and the notion that government’s are beholden to citizens, not the other way around. While B.C. has yet to see a politician recalled, a politician did resign when it appeared as if a petition to see him recalled had enough signatures. It would appear as if the legislation works. PC MPP Randy Hillier introduced private member’s Bill 124 in late November which, if passed, would allow for citizens to trigger a provincial recall if a petition is signed by 25 per cent of voters. Hillier said that he is prepared to amend the legislation to include municipal representation as well. When I asked Premier Kathleen Wynne her thoughts on recall legislation, she responded that she expects a “robust debate,” but stopped short of endorsing the measure. When asked what he thought of recall legislation, Mayor Eddie Francis commented that it should be implemented throughout all levels of government equally if it were to be implemented at all.
“If you’re going to introduce recall legislation and hide behind this veil of open and accountable and transparent government … I can assure there are municipal residents across the province that would want to recall provincial politicians of all stripes and federal politicians of all stripes as well,” he said. “It’s a slippery slope, man.” Francis noted, quite aptly, that constituents elect individuals to represent their interests in government and that the “constituency drives what happens at any political level.” Francis is correct in stating that introducing recall legislation is a “slippery slope” since at the very core of recall legislation is the notion of undoing the previous will of the electorate. With a recall, small voices are able to garner much attention and there is the potential for a politician to be removed from office with less votes than which cast them into office. This is something which should worry both politicians and citizens alike. At the crux of the issue, and at the end of the day, citizens need to demand more accountability and better governance from those whom they choose to elevate to higher office. Let’s face it, we’ve been lucky in Canada overall. We’ve had scandals here and there— some minor, while others major— but for the most part, our politicians have put their respective offices and governments before their political aspirations, and have stepped down when things went awry. What we are facing recently is a form of politics where politicians are emboldened by social media ‘celebrity’ status, inaccurate or misleading polling and a lack of being held to account by their colleagues, the media and the electorate overall.
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— JON LIEDTKE
NeWS In on the ping pong racket
Table tennis trend sparks interest of downtown Windsor entrepreneur nATASHA mArAr
Players driving balls at the newly opened b.V.’s House of Pong, Windsor’s first table tennis social club » Photo natasha Marar
Skunk, topspin and chop may be foreign terms to those unfamiliar with table tennis, but one Windsorite is hoping his new club will help drive ping pong culture in the city. Brian Vinson has just opened B.V.’s House of Pong, a 4,000 square feet, open concept space located at 511 Ouellette Ave., above Bistro 507. “People are really impressed with the space and they think of the idea of a ping pong parlour is cool, unique ... and something different,” said Vinson. “For a playing area you need at least 19 feet by 11 feet per table. So you need a big open area. What I love about this space is the windows that face Ouellette [Avenue] really open it up and showcase the downtown strip.” House of Pong has 10 professional ping pong tables; two of which are International Table
Tennis Federation qualifying tables. It offers recreational game play by the hour as well as monthly memberships and a loyalty program. Vinson said he plans on establishing leagues and tournaments.
We try to make it as inclusive and as mainstream as possible
House of Pong has also partnered with The Squirrel Cage to provide food to players. Light snacks and refreshments are also available, and Vinson is applying to have the club licensed. Speaking about his motivation to start the business, Vinson said he wants to entice more people downtown with something different to do. “Our friends have been playing it for fun without real rules. We started thinking there is no place to play proper ping pong. I find it fun, and it’s active too. You
don’t really think of it as active, but you actually run out of breath when you’re going for awhile.”
- DIallo sMITH (DrIVe Table TennIs soCIal ClUb)
Ping pong has a long history that started in the 1880s in England. Today, it’s an Olympic sport and the International Table Tennis Federation is the second largest
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international federation. Table tennis social clubs have been popping up over the past few years in several North American cities, including Detroit, Toronto, San Francisco, New York, Milwaukee and Denver. Diallo Smith opened Drive, Michigan’s only social club for the sport, last year in Detroit. “I’ve had a chance to see this concept in another city. At the time, I thought, what a cool concept and idea. [My wife and I] ... wanted to start a business that we thought would be different and profitable but also be kind of a social catalyst to provide some alternative choices for your average time out and be a place where a wide array of people could enjoy the same experience,” said Smith. Smith said the response has been
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great from a variety of people— groups of friends, families, coworkers and travellers— visiting Drive from the metro Detroit and Windsor areas. “[Ping pong] has a wide international appeal. Just even domestically, I can’t think of one person who hasn’t had some form of experience with ping pong, whether it’s at a summer camp or in a basement,” added Smith. For both Vinson and Smith, the concept of their business is to keep it fun and competitive while still accessible for non-professionals. “At most table tennis clubs you have very strong players. It can be very exclusive if you’re somebody who just wants to casually hit the ball and go out with a few of your friends. We try to make it as inclusive and as mainstream as possible,” said Smith.
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THE URBANITE » URBANITENEWS.COM » DEC. 4, 2013 » 5
The war over Ward 7 JOn LIedTKe
Advanced polls have closed and voting will soon be underway to elect a city councilor to represent Ward 7, which has been without representation since the summer. Former Coun. Percy Hatfield jumped ship from municipal to provincial waters leaving 11 candidates vying for the seat, and inundating residents with a heavy field of campaign literature, signage and door knocking.
cant media buzz, Collier doesn’t expect a high voter turnout and said a significant outcome of the election will be giving the winner a leg up on the competition in the 2014 general election. Collier noted that this byelection was interesting because all candidates are running against each other and not an incumbent.
Cheryl Collier, University of Windsor political science professor, explained that byelections aren’t of the most importance at the municipal level.
“This is a brand new opening for people to get their foot in the door on city council and [in politics],” said Collier. “A lot of people like to start with the municipal level and use that as a springboard to other levels of politics … I think that’s the main reason you’ve got 11 candidates in this byelection.”
“[Byelections] offer people an opportunity if you’re talking about partisan politics to send a message to the government that’s in power, but we don’t even have partisan politics in this case,” said Collier. “This was a different kind of beast I suppose.”
With 11 candidates, Collier noted that name recognition would provide a “big advantage” to the candidates as opposed to “others that might be brand new to politics and have a little bit of work cut out for them to be noticed in the field of 11.”
While the byelection is generating signifi-
What are your top priorities for Ward 7 should you be elected? Irek Kusmierczyk wants to find solutions for youth unemployment by bringing more resources to educational institutions. steve stavros wants to see an increase in business development, medical services, youth athletic programs and facilities specifically available for the community. robin Fortier wants to see more longterm jobs with decent wages and the protection of programs and services which residents rely on. laurie Komon listed among her top priorities: communication, issues with 311, the reinstatement of an auditor general and more accessible transportation. ernie The baconman wants to put
people to work directly and plans to direct half of his council salary towards employing local youth to sell his meat products. Clint Weir wants to lower both water rates and property taxes in all categories and hopes to pay off the city’s debt by 2018. angelo Marignani listed five top concerns of residents: being fiscally prudent, being transparent with utility costs, being proactive with repairing infrastructure, the reimplementation of an auditor general and the diversification of the economy to help develop more jobs. Tom Wilson wants to see the expansion of both banwell and Tecumseh roads and the extension of lauzon Parkway to Highway 401.
CONGRATULATIONS TO WINDSOR’S NEWEST NEWS PUBLICATION Brian Masse MP Windsor West 2-1398 Ouellette Ave, Windsor, ON N8X 1J8 (519) 255-1631 www.brianmasse.ca
Joe Comartin MP Windsor-Tecumseh 1304 B Lauzon Rd. Windsor, ON N8S 3N1 (519) 988-1826 www.joecomartin.ca
Several candidates running don’t live in the ward they hope to represent and Collier noted that this could affect the votes of residents. “[Voters] would prefer having somebody who lives in the ward, that understands the ward issues, that are long time residents and want to represent those people,” said Collier. “But representation isn’t just about living in a ward and understanding the interests of that particular geographic boundaries.” Increasingly, voter apathy plagues Canadian elections and Collier noted that it can be fueled by cynicism among many other reasons. Ward 7 resident Yousef Hamden, 24, who is in traditionally one of the most apathetic age demographics, brought a friend with him to cast their ballots during advanced polling. Hamden considers himself politically active and voted for Irek Kusmierczyk because he liked both his campaign and personality.
What do you think of the recent phallic bushes by the river? “I guess the bushwackers should find another hobby.” - angelo Marignani. “no opinion and no comment.” - Tom Wilson. no response - Irek Kusmierczyk. “I think that it’s not the best way for a starving artist to showcase his skills because it wouldn’t look very good on his resume.” - steve stavros. “The recent phallic bushes are just another way of saying we need to get our downtown back. Windsor got recognition in the media, but in a negative way.” - robin Fortier.
“There’s a large field for this byelection and it was hard to go through all of the platforms, so I listened to the debates,” said Hamden. “I met [Kusmierczyk] before and he struck me as a pretty charismatic guy. He’s a young guy which is a little bit different than a lot of the other candidates … [he] had a good debate against the others and, just by process of elimination, some of the other candidates didn’t appeal to me.” Hamden wasn’t impressed that all of the candidates didn’t show up to all of the public debates. “I’m not looking for a candidate to make a world of difference, it’s kind of hard in municipal politics,” said Hamden. “I’m looking for someone to step up and have a responsible role for us and speak up for the community. Some of these candidates are promising jobs. I don’t think you can do that as a councillor; your role is limited. I hope that they can make an impact.”
“leave it to a prankster to give Windsor more media attention than we could ever buy. at least we’re not the “butt” of jokes on the Colbert report.” laurie Komon. “I think it’s great. I think what they’re doing downtown is making the parks beautiful, I think it’s great.” - ernie The baconman. “a very imaginative person(s) took the initiative to make a statement which has been the preoccupation of humankind through the millennia! Cheeky bloke!” Clint Weir. Tosin bello, robert bialkowski and steve Farrell didn’t respond to questions asked by the Urbanite.
FOOD& DRINK Lonsbery Brewery taps into micro-brewing “You want people to drink your beers and appreciate the time and effort that you put into creating that recipe or brewing that batch.” -Karl Lonsbery
Harrow wine marker Karl Lonsbery is starting a craft brewery that he expects to launch next spring or summer » Photo Adam D’Andrea
Deciding on a case of beer after a long, hard day of work or school has become far more difficult than grabbing a six pack of your “old faithful” and heading home.
“I’m going to grow the majority of the wheat and barley and hops. I’m going to put a hop yard in just so everything’s there,” said Lonsbery. “So when people come, they can actually see where it comes from.”
If you walk into an LCBO or Beer Store today you’ll probably notice a growing selection of craft beers. Small breweries are popping up all across Canada to deliver new and unique beers to consumers. One of them is the Lonsbery Brewing Co., which will be opened by local brewer Karl Lonsbery by the spring or early summer of next year. Lonsbery, who is currently the winemaker at the Mastronardi Estate Winery, will be growing at least 30 per cent of his own ingredients at the brewery, which will be located on his farm in Harrow.
According to Ontario Craft Brewers, craft beers are brewed in small batches using the brewers’ unique recipes that contain no additives or preservatives. Lonsbery said he believes the biggest difference between craft and major breweries is the quality of ingredients. “It’s all about dollars and cents to (the major breweries). I think more on the craft side, hence the name ‘craft brewing,’ it’s about making money but it’s also about giving the best product to the consumer,” said Lonsbery. “You want people to drink
your beers and appreciate the time and effort that you put into creating that recipe or brewing that batch.” The popularity of craft beer has increased significantly within a relatively short period of time. From 2011-2012, Ontario craft beer net dollar sales at the LCBO grew by 29.4 per cent and had a sales growth of about 45 per cent. In June, OCB estimated there were close to 150 craft breweries in Canada with around 50 in Ontario alone. Lonsbery said he believes they’ve become so popular because many beer drinkers are becoming tired of the same old thing. “Everything evolves and people want different flavours now. People are open-
L ISC I O
ing their eyes and more willing to try new stuff,” said Lonsbery. “But it’s not about changing somebody either. It’s about introducing them to something different.” Does the growing popularity of craft beers mean the major breweries will be run out of town any time soon? According to Lonsbery, probably not. However, the current sales trends suggest this is an ideal time for small brewers to try to break into the industry. “You’re always going to have your Coors Lights and Buds and whatever else. Those guys aren’t going away anytime soon,” said Lonsbery. “But for someone small like me, I think it’s a good opportunity and a good time in the market to get going. Hopefully, I can just capitalize on the change of the market.”
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THE URBANITE » URBANITENEWS.COM » DEC. 4, 2013 » 7
Warm ‘n groggy Getting cozy with a festive bottle of mulled wine
Spam; Hormel to gourmet
NATASHA MARAR Cold winter evenings are usually synonymous with mugs of warm butter rum and apple cider. This season, sip (or guaff, it’s that delicious) a cup of mulled wine. This popular holiday treat is usually prepared by warming full-bodied red wine with spices, citrus fruit and sugar. Harrow’s Sprucewood Shores Estate Winery offers a 2012 Warm n’ Cozy Mulled Wine that’s already steeped with flavour. Warm n’ Cozy is a blend of 60 per cent Pinot Noir and 40 per cent Cabernet Sauvignon infused with cinnamon and other spices. Sure, you could mull red wine in a pot, but Warm n’ Cozy takes care of the full process by providing a nicely spiced wine that tastes complex and rich with a simple heating.
Most people react to the word Spam the same way they would if someone sneezed on them
To bring out the flavours, heat to desired temperature in a pot, adding cinnamon sticks, cloves and orange slices, if desired. If you’re looking to get out of the city, sample the mulled wine at Spruce Wood’s Holiday Fair happening every Sunday until Dec. 22. Enjoy food, live music and wine by the fire pit on the winery’s patio.
Warm n’ Cozy is available at the winery and select Windsor LCBO stores for $11.95. _____________________
Mull Your Own Wine 1 750mL bottle full-bodied red wine (Cabernet Sauvignon, Shiraz, Pinot Noir) 250 ml (1 cup) apple cider 125 ml (1/2 cup) honey or white sugar 1 orange, sliced 3 cinnamon sticks 3 whole star anise 3 whole cloves Directions: Cut a 12-inch square of
cheesecloth. Arrange the spices in the centre of the of the square and tie it with cooking twine. Place it in a pot, and pour in the wine and cider and brandy. Stir in the honey or sugar and add orange slices. Warm over low heat for 45 minutes to allow the flavors to come together. Ladle into mugs. Serves 6.
Most people react to the word Spam the same way they would if someone sneezed on them. There’s disdain, confusion and little bit of suspicion as to why anyone would eat such a thing. So it came as a surprising fact that it’s a local favourite in the Hawaiian culture, selling 7 million cans a year, according Spam’s website. Nicknamed Hawaiian steak, it’s sold everywhere from grocery stores to high-end restaurants and mainstream fast food chains such as McDonalds and Burger King. Hawaii’s not alone in their love of Spam. The controver-
sial spiced ham is a favourite in Southeast Asia, Philippines, Guam, the U.K., Hong Kong, Korea and Minnesota. Six years of post secondary education has left me with two things: one, a taste for learning and experiencing other cultures and, two, limited monetary funds. Spam came as the perfect solution to getting the best of both worlds— allowing me to create an authentic Hawaiian dish for under $10 dollars. Aside from not having to break the bank, the recipe takes little preparation and will be finished before you can say wham bam thank you Spam. Spam Steak with Fried Rice and Pineapple Relish Ingredients: 1 can of Spam 1 bag of Uncle Ben’s microwavable white rice 1 egg 1 tbsp butter 125 ml (1/2 cup) canned, cubed pineapple 125 ml (1/2 cup) cucumber, finely chopped 1 1/2 tbsp olive oil salt and pepper, to taste sesame seeds (optional)
Start by cutting the Spam into one-inch thick pieces and then cutting them into triangles. Brush olive oil and on both sides of the meat and season with pepper. Using a stove top grill pan, heat olive oil on medium-high heat and cook for one minute on each side. Grill the Spam, rotating on a 45-degree angle for 30 seconds on each side. Preheat the oven to 180 C (350 F) and cook for an additional five minutes. Cook the rice for 90 seconds in the microwave and set aside. Melt 1 tbsp of butter on high heat in a frying pan. Pour a beaten egg into the pan and scramble into small pieces. In the same pan add another 1/2 tbsp of butter and mix the rice, egg for about two minutes. Sprinkle with salt and pepper and garnish with sesame seeds. For the relish, mix canned pineapple (with the juice) with cucumber. Place the rice in the middle of the plate, put Spam steaks on top and place relish over entire dish. Serves 2.
THE URBANITE » URBANITENEWS.COM » DEC. 4, 2013 » 8
Beer Exchange stocks up
Moooove over Guinness Walkerville Brewery’s Milk Stout is cream-worthy
IIII/5 fresh,” said Olsen.
Walkerville Brewery has released a stout seasonal beer ready for your holiday shindig. The Milk Stout, which debuted at the brewery’s Art of Beer event on Nov. 22, is now available for purchase.
Chef Duggan, who hails from the kitchen at the former Hilton Hotel, is keeping the menu small with items such as pulled ham sandwiches, rosemary chicken wraps, waffle fries and mushroom bisque soup.
The Milk Stout is a smooth, rich mediumbodied beer with 4.8% alc/vol. and 32 IBUs. It’s delicious on its own or paired with a meal. Sampling the beer revealed a slight sweetness with smoky, roasted flavours of caramel, cream and chocolate.
“Basically our idea was to not have any bar clichés. Every time that we go to a bar, it’s always the same menu: you’ve got chicken wings, quesadilla, burgers. It never changes. So we’re trying to do it a little bit different,” remarked Olsen.
Walkerville Brewery’s Milk Stout is the first creation by head brewmaster Paul Brady, who came from Michigan to the brewery four months ago.
The Windsor Beer Exchange is the city’s latest concept bar, featuring fluctuating craft beer prices and homemade eats » Photo Stephen Hargreaves NATASHA MARAR Impatient craft beer drinkers are finally able to enjoy something new on tap with the opening of The Windsor Beer Exchange. The bar-restaurant opened quietly on Nov. 21 after teasing Facebook fans since July about its launch. Owners Josh Olsen, Ted Root and Dan Duggan have been renovating the twofloor establishment at 493 University Ave. W. for about a year. Through their business, Little Coast Kitchen Cleaning, Olsen and Duggan came across the empty space, which had been left for storage after the closure of Downtown Z’s in 2004. The 220-capacity building boasts a main floor dining and bar area, large garage door windows, a lounge/games area and a second floor bar that the owners plan to set up for live shows. But the bar’s theme of fluctuating beer prices like a stock exchange brings a new experience to craft beer drinking. “There’s a couple of beer exchanges in Michigan. We went out there, we checked out it, thought it was a cool idea … so we went for it,” Olsen said, noting the lack of similar concept bars in Canada.
A beer exchange works on sales; if a beer is not selling it goes down in price, and if it is selling, the price goes up in 25 cent increments. “A lot of people told us that we couldn’t do it because of [the legality of changing alcohol prices and the AGCO]. But the rule actually is, if you change prices the customer has to know about the change and they can see it on the screen,” said Olsen, referring to a computer display listing the most up-to-date hourly beer prices. The Exchange carries bottles of the usual domestic beers, but all its offerings on tap are Ontario craft beers from breweries such as Bell City, Railway City, Walkerville, Bayside, Mill Street and Thornbury Village Cidery. “We’re trying to go with southern Ontario,” said Olsen. “The whole idea was basically, we love Michigan craft beers and Michigan has some of the best craft beers, so kind of a place for people from Michigan to showcase what southern Ontario has to offer. Stay as local as possible is our idea.” Focusing on local has also translated into The Windsor Beer Exchange’s food menu. “We go to the [Market Square] for pretty much everything … we get buns delivered every day. We want everything
“Our main thing is the pulled ham sandwich. It has a sweet Pepsi glaze on it, that’s going to be our signature. We’re going to keep it pretty small, maybe eight to nine menu items.” Olsen thinks there’s an appetite for the beer exchange concept in Windsor. “People are really excited … We’ve never gone out [to advertise], people have contacted us all the time. I think that just an average bar selling beer wouldn’t have this much of a response to it. ” _______________________________ The Windsor Beer Exchange is located at 493 University Ave. W., and is open daily from 11 a.m. to 2 a.m
“I was excited to do it, I thought the idea past [brewery owner] Chris [Ryan]. He liked the idea because we needed a christmas seasonal beer,” said Brady. “I did my damndest and it came out just exactly as I wanted.” Brady describes the Milk Stout as having “a bit of a lactose note at front, a little sweet followed with a medium body and a light chocolate roasted note at the back, and finished where you’ve got a little bit with you but to where you [can’t have another sip]. It’s supposed to make you want another sip.” The beer is available in 125 limited edition growlers ($50), 75 signed growlers ($75) and 500 ml flip-top bottles ($8.95), branded in labels designed by Walkerville artist Julia Conlon. The Milk Stout bottle labels capture scenes of the Prohibition era.
THE URBANITE » URBANITENEWS.COM » DEC. 4, 2013 » 9
» Photo Christine McAvoy
CBC jock’s book is off the moorings JON LIEDTKE
When CBC Radio 3’s Grant Lawrence sought to write his second book, The Lonely End of the Rink: Confessions of a Reluctant Goalie, he had intended the topic to be about music— as did many of his fans. What he wrote however was a introspective and revealing retelling of his rocky experience with Canada’s national pastime, hockey, and how he had previously associated the game with bullying, intimidation and violence. Lawrence’s first book, Adventures in Solitude: What Not to Wear to a Nude Potluck and Other Stories from Desolation Sound, was about his experiences at a remote summer camp. In an interview with the Urbanite, Lawrence explained that his reasoning for not writing about music the second time around was that he was led astray by doing his own art. “I’m a music journalist [and] that’s my job sometimes [five to seven] days a week,” said Lawrence. “When I get home, I often feel like the last thing I want to do [is] to write about it.” Understanding he disappointed some fans with this genre choice, Lawrence promised
that his third book would be about music. Lawrence’s latest book focuses on his long and deeply conflicted relationship with hockey and how he was pushed away from the game as a child, only to be “drawn back to it later in life, finally on my own terms.” Like many Canadian children, Lawrence wanted to like hockey, but he found it difficult. “All the kids that beat on me, mentally and physically, were wearing hockey jackets, so I associated violence and intimidation and fear with hockey. I didn’t want anything to do with it.” As he matured, Lawrence became an artist and musician and it wasn’t until years later when he first learned of a hockey tournament comprised of arts-based teams (think musicians, authors AND comedians) that hockey began to appeal to him again. “I thought, ‘Oh my god, I can’t believe that that’s even possible,’ and I actually went out to it a few times and covered it for the CBC and it was kind of like finding a Shangri-la of hockey,” said Lawrence. “The whole point of the tournament was to create an environment that was free of intimidation and violence and bullying, exactly
what I [had] associated with hockey.” Ten years ago, Lawrence brought the idea home and formed the Vancouver Flying Vees, an amateur team comprised of authors, musicians and comedians.
Lawrence has hesitation about his infant son playing hockey because of the potential for bullying, explaining that his main concern is whether or not his son will open up to him about problems.
“All of [us] were pushed out for one reason or another,” said Lawrence. “It’s pretty cool that we’ve been able to form this team and just play this game, this thing, this pastime that is supposed to be Canada’s right of passage … on our own terms.”
“I’m definitely going to teach him how to skate like my parents did when I was very young and then we’ll see. If he feels like getting into hockey he can; I won’t helicopter. But I will make sure to try to keep a close eye on it,” he said.
The biggest challenge Lawrence had writing this book wasn’t reliving painful experiences but instead writing about the bullies.
Lawrence explained that the main theme of the book was social survival and the idea that “it gets better.”
Since it’s a non-fiction book, Lawrence took effort to change the name of his childhood bullies to protect their identities as he didn’t want to expose them for past childhood missteps. “Most of [the bullies] are alive and doing well and probably did not expect an expose on about how much of a douchebag they were in elementary school to hit the shelves,” said Lawrence. “If you’re a bully in Grade five … you probably mature to a certain point by your 30s or 40s, so I didn’t want to throw them under the bus.”
“No matter what is dictated upon you in life, whether you’re a little kid or whether you’re an adult, I would hope the takeaway is that we should always try to live life on our own terms,” Lawrence said. “I’m not talking like Rob Ford like ‘I feel like smoking crack therefore I will smoke crack,’ just living life in the best way you can without that fear of intimidation, being able to do what you want to do as long as it’s vaguely legal and have fun with it, and live the life that you want to live.”
THE URBANITE » URBANITENEWS.COM » DEC. 4, 2013 » 10
Soullière set to animate arts grants
Battlefield 4 fan videos are being produced in Windsor » Photo courtesy Aperture VFX
Local Battlefield videos go viral jon liedtke
You might not know it, but there’s a war going on in Windsor. Michelle Soullière has recently been appointed as one of two provincial cultural animators for the Ontario Arts Council » Photo courtesy Michelle Soullière jon liedtke The Ontario Arts Council has expanded its cultural animator test pilot and to hire arts advocates in both Windsor and Kingston, Ont. Michelle Soullière, a local multidisciplinary artist, has recently been hired as Windsor’s latest cultural animator. She follows in the footsteps of Alana Bartol, who was the first cultural animator hired by the OAC. “[The OAC] recognize that there’s some momentum building in Windsor in terms of community arts practices, so it’s really great that they’re able to have this position here again,” said Soullière. “Last time it was a trial run, and they’ve decided to run it for another cycle, which is a year contract.” According to the OAC, a cultural animator is responsible for promoting community arts practices and raising awareness about the OAC’s Artist in the Community/Workplace granting program. They are viewed as “community resources, on hand to assist potential applicants who are developing projects and proposals.” In addition to sitting on a jury to award the grant, Soullière received the grant multiple times for Broken City Lab, an artist-led interdisciplinary collective and non-profit she helped to found, which, according to its website seeks to “explore and unfold curiosities around locality, infrastructures, education and creative practice leading towards civic change.”
Broken City Lab received the grant for its project Save the City, which featured five months of community engaged projects. “For that we did one event per month where we collaborated with the community of Windsor to get information about the city and to produce works based on the collaboration.” “This is kind of like a niche grant that they offer but it’s definitely an up-and-coming practice within the arts to collaborate and be community engaged,” she said. “It [has] a lot to do with the work that Broken City Lab has done over the past five years. It’s building momentum locally and now getting provincial recognition for that.” During her term as cultural animator, there will be two granting cycles, with March 3 and Oct. 1 deadlines next year. Soullière will work with individuals, artists and non-arts partners to facilitate partnerships, help develop grant applications and to help them develop support materials. “I’m really looking forward to connecting people together and maybe sparking some ideas [and] helping develop the projects,” she said. Soullière will be blogging about her position and community engaged arts practices, hosting information sessions in the future, and holding one-on-one interviews with interested applicants. Those seeking to contact her can reach her at cultural. email@example.com.
Ojibway Park was recently transformed into a figurative war zone by local video production company ApertureVFX, which filmed Battlefield 4: Divided We Stand. The crew made the Battlefield 4 fan film for Machinima, popular U.S.-based gaming and video streaming website. Battlefield 4 was one of the most anticipated first-person shooters to be released on video game platforms in 2013. In the game, players are Sgt. Daniel “Reck” Recker, a member of Tombstone, a U.S. special operations squad tasked with stopping a war. Jendo Shabo of ApertureVFX said the three-person company first started making short VFX fan films for YouTube and has since partnered with Machinima to produce live-action films based on video games. Shabo said team members Marcello Morie and Stiven Agoubi and himself are self-taught, with two working solely on post-production and one focusing on preproduction. “We were looking to get partnered on YouTube, so we were sending out e-mails to different networks and Machinima wanted us to make a video for their main channel,” said Shabo. “From there, we made [a fan film for] Black Ops 2 in Real Life. They really liked that, so they wanted five more of those for their channel.” The scope of Battlefield 4: Divided We Stand started as a small action scene, but was soon expanded to include a narrative and additional episodes. “We added a narrative to it because it felt too small,” said Shabo, who explained
that Machinima provided the team with a $2,500 budget. “We were given a budget for a small action scene and then we turned it into a four-episode narrative series, which isn’t so good for the budget because it wasn’t really in there for that. But I’m really proud of how it ended up looking.” Shabo joked that the majority of the budget was spent on food for the cast, which might seem odd, but when you consider that cast and crew totaled 20, the figure makes sense. According to Shabo, actors from Windsor, Toronto and Norfolk County volunteered their time to the project because of “how fun it was to do.” Filing the series took roughly seven full days over a one-month period and the editing process is still ongoing. The first episode of the series has garnered over 40,000 views in roughly half a month, but Shabo explained that views aren’t something that he overly focuses on. “I just try to focus on the episode itself, make sure that’s as good as it can be,” said Shabo. “I don’t really like thinking [about metrics]. I don’t like getting psyched out by that stuff.” Shabo did admit that he really likes “that people are enjoying our episodes” and that “people are watching what we make.” Filming took place at the Windsor west-side docks and Shabo also received permission from Ojibway Park administration to film on location. The next episode of Battlefield 4: Divided We Stand is set to be released on Dec. 7 at machinima.com. Watch the first episode on Machinima’s YoutTube channel.
THE URBANITE » URBANITENEWS.COM » DEC. 4, 2013 » 11
For the love of animals
The High Bar Gang Lost and Undone: A Gospel Jazz Companion True North Records
Sudbury’s Coast Redwood connect indie and nature
OLD CABIN OLD CABIN S/R
Shallow, thin and and overly produced are words one might think of country music today when the genre’s poster child is Taylor Swift.
Old Cabin is the work of Whitehorse singer/songwriter Jona Barr. Performing for nearly 10 years in other musical arrangements, Barr has put together his first The High Bar Gang are a sevenalbum, Old Cabin, a collection of piece country bluegrass band from eloquent, soulful folk, alt. country Vancouver producing beautiful akin to the likes of Damien Jurado and sometimes haunting sounds and Windsor expat Field Assemon their debut record. It’s an bly. authentic throwback to eerie folk of the 1960s but with the playful Old Cabin’s self-titled album came sound of Dolly Parton. out independently in October. Barr released two EPs in 2012, It’s easy to imagine Grand Ole Growing Up Young and a split EP Opry scenes of western ware, or with Yukon’s Old Time Machine. feelings of the old west and Okeh Records’ 78s from a time long ago, Of particular note on Old Cabin while listening to the tracks flaware the lovely melodies of “Lightlessly slide from song to song. House” and the uptempo break down in “Good Days Bad Days.” If there’s any downfall to the collection of songs it stems from the Old Cabin’s songs alternate fact it’s also a gospel album, which from the sparse cold of a Yukon some may not connect lyrically to winter to the warmth of curling up, slightly drunk, in front of a it. The terms “God” and “Jesus” appear an uncomfortable amount fire. There’s a rural sound evoked through beautiful chord changes, of times over the 40-minute runas the initial pace of the first half time. of the album gives way to a slower, melancholy finish, particularly It shouldn’t come as a shock, the album’s cover is of an old country noted in “Finders Keepers” and “Winter Summer.” church with the word “gospel” in white against black. If you’re looking for an absorbing Even if it leaves you a little uneasy album with memories of unreit’s very digestible with most of the quited love, spend an evening with 14 songs running about three min- Old Cabin. utes in length. The album was released recently by True North Records but this is not really an autumn album. Listen to it now, but it will sound better when spring comes breaking the blanket of cold. The future of country music is looking bright. — jay verspeelt
— NATASHA MARAR
Coast Redwood brings their blend of indie rock to Phog Lounge on Dec. 12 » Photo Lindsay Cayen natasha marar Sudbury, Ont. indie rockers Coast Redwood are embarking on their first tour to sing about trees and dead animals and cause a “stink” in the Ontario music landscape. “My band members ask me what the hell I’m talking about as well,” laughed singer/guitarist Stephen Giroux. “It’s a weird obsession I’ve got. I’m a vegetarian and it just always comes out; the morality I have. I’m not against meat or anything, I just have this strange sympathy with animals.” “The song, ‘Dead Where I Lay,’ is about the shock of seeing a hunted animal on the flatbed of a truck. It’s nothing negative; just the strangeness of it,” he added. The four-piece outfit, also consisting of guitarist and vocalist Sam Cassio, bassist Emmett Turkington and drummer Spencer Jose, will debut their upcoming album, Spirit, at Windsor’s Phog Lounge on Dec. 12.
“We just heard there’s some good stuff coming out of the city,” said Giroux about the desire to play in Windsor. “We had some knowledge of there being good venues and decent bands.” Giroux promises audiences an energetic live show when they roll into town. “We’re pretty fun live. I often hurt myself and members of the band. We break stuff a bunch. It’s fun.” Dead animals and on-stage antics aside, Giroux said the band plans to go full-time with their music. “We are very serious about it, we do want to do this the rest of our lives,” he said. “The EP (released last year) was kind of a rough shot. We didn’t spend a lot of time on it. We were really excited and just wanted to get it done already. We wanted to have something to sell, of course, but also to apply for Ontario Arts Council grants, which we did get.”
Coast Redwood is trying to embody “creativity” and “a feeling of being involved in something,” said Giroux. “Everyone (in music) wants to stick to their own projects and not make friends. I don’t want to speak too largely, but I think it’s just necessary in music to do that (collaborate).” Giroux is teaming with friend Neil Bednis from Sudbury bands The Almighty Rhombus and Geyser to start Radiclaw Records. He plans on releasing Coast Redwood’s album and Geyser’s upcoming LP on the label. “We’re looking at getting some grants. It’s all in the beginning stages right now,” he said. “We want to start making a name, making a bit of a stink.” __________________________ Coast Redwood treks down Hwy 401 to play Phog Lounge Dec. 12 with Windsor’s Good Things and The Spooky But Nice opening the show. Spirit comes out Jan. 28, but advance copies will be available at their show.
holiday shopping guide 1 2 3
g ift Win i deas d so f râ€™s b rom est! 6
1. Korg MS-20 Mini fully analog rerelease of the iconic 1978 MS-20 $635 [Long and McQuade 1801 Walker Rd or long-mcquade.com] 2. Native Union pOp retro phone for smartphones and tablets $39 [Poppy Paperie & Gifts 1823 Wyandotte St. E] 3. MEK Detroit skyline messenger bag (made in Windsor) $50 [e-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org] 4. Dwell City Studio transportation bib set for the young urbanite $34.95 [1719 Wyandotte St. E or bumpmaternityonline.com] 5. Bobbin Birdie bicycle London cycle chic imported direct from England $599 [City Cyclery 553 Lincoln Rd. or citycyclery. ca] 6. Kevin Murphy Color Bug fun full-on hair colour but without the commitment $24.95 [POP Hair Gallery 973 Erie St. E]
at more gre m g ifts f ro Wind sor!
1. Radio Revolution: The Rise and Fall of the Big 8 DVD documentary $29 [Dr. Disc 471 Ouellette Ave. or radiorevolutiondvd.com] 2. A Forgotten City Windsor historical photo book from Walkerville Publishing $50 [all ﬁne book shops or walkerville.com] 3. Windsor Stubby 32oz of your choice beer $9.75 [Walkerville Brewery 525 Argyle Rd.] 4. Motor Burger t-shirts $25 [Motor Burger 888 Erie St. E] 5. Herschel Supply Co. Retreat backpack $99 [BB Branded 347 Ouellette Ave. or Devonshire Mall or bbbranded.com] 6. pelee purse class up box wine with 3L of Merlot in a cardboard purse $32.95 [Pelee Island Winery 455 Seacliff Drive, Kingsville] 7. rino’s Kitchen; Windsor chef Rino Bortolin brings farm to fork to book $24.95 [all ﬁne book shops or biblioasis.com] 8. Eames Lounge Chair and Ottoman designed by Charles and Ray Eames in 1956 it was and still is one of a kind $4,499 [Flow Furniture Boutique, 1900 Wyandotte St. E]
Keeping X-mas expenses out of excess elise keller “Once again we come to the holiday season, a deeply religious time, that each of us observes in our own way, by going to the mall of our choice.” - Dave Barry Repeat after me, “Christmas is not about gifts.” One more time, “Christmas is not about gifts.” Although most of us acknowledge that Christmas is meant to be about time with loved ones, good cheer and at its foundation, well, Jesus, we just can’t help but get carried away. We want to spoil our friends and loved ones; even well adjusted, normally rational spenders can lose all perspective between November and December and spend way more than they can realistically afford. Whatever your household income, sit down and work out how much you can afford to spend over Christmas. Set yourself limits to spend on each person you need to buy for, and stick to it. Aside from this fairly generic budget building advice, I’ve put together some tips and tricks to help keep you from the dreaded financial holiday hangover. Cash is king. Paying with a credit card can be beneficial for collect points or rewards and building credit, but only if you trust yourself not to go over budget and to pay it all off at the end of the season. If this doesn’t sound like you, then whatever you do, leave the credit card at home! Instead, withdraw your lump sum Christmas budget in good old fashioned cash. Use only this fund for your Christmas spending. When the money runs out, so does your gifting.
Leave it all to the last minute. You read right. Many businesses panic right before Christmas and put any large amount of unsold merchandise on sale. In this case, it pays to procrastinate. Channel your inner DIYer. Websites like Pinterest are full of great craft and recipe ideas that are sure to please your friends, your family and your wallet. My personal favourite is chocolate truffles. They are fast and easy and it’s near impossible to find someone who does not like chocolate. They are also an easy recipe to make with kids— they’ll love getting their hands all chocolatey while they roll the little bites. It’s what’s on the inside that counts. Wrapping, boxes, bows and cards can bring the cost up by $5 or even $10 per gift. A large roll of recycled packing paper can cost as little as $2. Pretty it up with a fancy bow or cool stamps to give your gifts a trendy, industrial-chic feel all while reducing your environmental impact. What does Christmas mean to you? Take some time to consider this question. Our financial decisions are a lot more emotional than we may think and linking them to our values can help to put in all in perspective. Resist the temptation to prove your love through spending, keep up with The Jones,’ give in to advertising, or whatever your personal spending vice may be. Keep your answer top of mind throughout the holiday to help keep yourself and your bank account on track. ________________________________ Elise Keller is a financial co-ordinator of cash flow strategies with Soulliere Financial.
infographic by Outright
ts great g if ro it! f ro m Det
8 6 7
1. Shinola Runwell 41mm watch (handmade in Detroit) $550 (USD) [Shinola 441 W Canﬁeld St., Detroit or shinola.com] 2. Good People Poppcorn, 1 L tin (made in Detroit) from $18 (USD) [633 Beaubien Detroit or goodpeoplepopcorn.com] 3. Detroit Cargo Davison bag $119 (CAD) [City Cyclery 553 Lincoln Rd. Windsor or detroitcargo.com] 4. Made in Detroit Christmas ornament $10 (USD) [madeindetroit.com] 5. Detroit bus scroll women’s v-neck (made in Detroit) $25 (3434 Russell St., Detroit or detroitmercantile.com) 6. Detroit City is the Place to Be: The Afterlife of an American Metropolis by Mark Binelli $32 (CAD) [most bookshops in Windsor and Detroit] 7. Detroit Tigers D Tile (made in Detroit) $35 (USD) [Pewabic Pottery 10125 E Jefferson Ave. or pewabicstore.org] 8. Smith Shop’s rings and cuffs (made from salvaged masonry nails) rings $80 (USD) cuffs $100 (USD) [smithshopdetroit. bigcartel.com]
Having fun when ‘it’s so cold in the D’
Skaters take to the ice and other winter activities in downtown Detroit, which continue throughout the holiday season » Photo Stephen Hargreaves stephen hargreaves Far too many Windsorites seem to believe that downtown Detroit is the dystopian nightmare portrayed in RoboCop. This interpretation is sad since Windsor is on the doorstep of a major American, family friendly metropolis, one that becomes a winter wonderland at this time of year. Every winter for the last 10 years, Campus Martius Park, the two-square block district that is the commercial centre— the heart of downtown Detroit and the home to America’s only city centre sandy beach hang out— becomes home to a massive skating rink, beer tent and pop up shop village. “It’s amazing and so heartwarming to know that this is my city,” said Sade Dennis. “It’s great to see old folks, young folks, whites, Asians, blacks and all having a
great time … you know families with kids, lovers ... shopping, skating and checking out the tree.” Campus Martius is the hub of Detroit’s Season of Winter Magic, including nostalgic horse drawn carriage rides around downtown weekdays from noon for $5, two dozen vendors at the holiday marketplace in Cadillac Square featuring Michigan made products, specialty and artisan boutiques and local food (Fridays and Saturdays noon to 9 p.m. and Sundays noon to 6 p.m.). The biggest draw to downtown D every winter is Campus Martius Park skating rink. It’s open from 11 a.m. through 10 p.m. Monday to Thursday, 11 a.m. to midnight on Friday and Saturday and noon to 8 p.m. on Sundays. The rink costs $7 ($6 for students and seniors) and if you forgot your skates rentals are $3. “I haven’t done this in years,” laughed
72-year-old Dorothy Abrahams. “I just came to listen to the bands and (my children) put me on the ice … I’m supposed to be over there (at the rinkside lounge) with the ice in my glass!” It’s true you can skate and listen to live Detroit music (Fridays and Saturdays noon to 11 p.m.) or sit rinkside with an adult beverage. If the limited wine, beer and spirits at the rinkside weren’t enough you can always mosey over to the warmth and cheer of local and national brews at the heated outdoor winter beer garden (Fridays through Sundays) all while jugglers, stiltwalkers and other street performers entertain the booze warmed masses. “Bringing the streets to life with great shopping and creating a destination here in Detroit’s vibrant urban core is our passion,” said Dan Mullen, vice-president of development for Bedrock Real Estate Services, a sponsor of Season of Winter Magic. “We’re proud to bring unique retail
options to Woodward Avenue in downtown Detroit this holiday season for all residents and visitors to enjoy.” Retailers popping up downtown include The Detroit Shoppe, showcasing people, places and products that have shaped Detroit; Rock Paper Scissors, offering personalized stationery, paper and home goods; The Hand-Made Company, home to many Michigan-made products from a variety of Detroit retailers; Spielhaus Toys, a handmade specialty toy shop; Somerset Collection City Loft, featuring Somerset Collection retailers in Detroit; and Moosejaw, Michigan’s outdoor retailer. __________________________________ For more information about all that is going on downtown Detroit this winter, call 313-962-0101, visit campusmartiuspark. org or jump on the tunnel bus or in you car and head for a Detroit style winter wonderland.
THE URBANITE » URBANITENEWS.COM » DEC. 4, 2013 » 17
Google’s wearable computer with optical display may look strange but is quite ingenious
All is through the Google Glass
Whether you like it or not, technology invariably is playing an increasing role in your life. This isn’t just a new phenomenon as technology has been permeating our collective consciousness since our ancestors of long ago came to realize that rocks and tools assisted them just as electronics assist us today. It should come as no surprise to learn that out of 2,000 Americans randomly sampled by the app tester SOASTA, 84 per cent of those surveyed responded that they use their smart phones before they even leave their bed in the morning. It is this phenomenon, that people have an incessant need to be both connected and informed, that Google is hoping to capitalize on with the introduction of Google Glass, the company’s first foray into wearable computing. “The whole idea is Glass is a very new technology; there really isn’t anything like it on the market. It looks new and different, and people have a lot of ideas about what it does and what it does not do,” said Anna Richardson White, communications manager for Google Glass at the Google Glass preview in Detroit last month. Google is hitting the road with Glass and visiting at least one American city a month WEARABILITY: The device is comfortable, lightweight and doesn’t feel all that different than wearing a pair of glasses.
to dispel myths about the new technology, allow potential customers to use the device, and presumably to help get the population ready and accepting of Glass before its inevitable and rapid rise. A few of the myths Google is attempting to dispel is the notion that the device is always on and recording video or taking photos, that the screen is always illuminated and that the device itself is distracting.
seeing my calendar [and] making sure I’m not missing anything, directions or traffic reports … things like that; all the useful things you love about your smartphone.” Google unveiled the Glass Explorer program earlier in 2013, using the hashtag #IfIHadGlass to invite users to share on social media how they would use the new technology. Those chosen to participate were granted the opportunity to spend $1,500 on the device and allowed both passive users and developers to use Glass.
The whole idea is Glass is a very new technology; there really isn’t anything like it on the market.
“The default is always off,” said White. “You’re never going to have it accidentally turn on and send an e-mail or anything because This campaign - anna rICHarDson WHITe you have to tap it or garnered 8,000 nod your head [to acGlass Explorers and (GooGle) tivate it] in a pretty exagas such, $12 million in gerated way … and then that’s the Google coffer; not bad just to turn the screen on. Then you for a beta rollout. have to speak to it through verbal cues.” While Glass may seem like a device for teWhile White uses the device to take chies and business types, White took effort photos and videos on the fly, she explained to explain that Google sees a wide range of that she primarily uses the device for applications for the everyday user: watchcommunications. “E-mail, text messages, ing music lessons on YouTube, learning PRICE: At $1,500 for the beta edition explorer model, the price tag is a bit high. But considering that components of the device cost little more than $300, a speculated price point of $500 is quite reasonable.
INTERACTIVITY: Interacting with Glass was very natural, from the voice commands to physical interaction with the device itself, using it felt both natural and easy.
new recipes in the kitchen and doing arts and crafts for example. The backbone of Glass is the Android operating system, and while some apps that exist on your current smartphone will run on Glass, most will need to be modified to work. Not seeking to be limited, however, Glass has partnered with nine major companies to develop Glasswear (apps for Glass), including CNN, the New York Times, Elle Magazine, Twitter, Google+, Facebook and Evernote to name a few. “Computers have just continued to get smaller, and now we’re seeing a wide growth of this wearable computing industry with [computer wrist watches], glassware, smart glassware … it really just is an evolution,” said White. “We feel like we’re adding to the environment that’s already been created, we’re just taking it a step further.” Glass is expected to hit the consumer market in the United States in 2014 and is rumoured to come to Canada in 2015.
PRACTICALITY: It’s easy to imagine how Glass could impact your life. From work productivity to capturing those important life moments, having Glass would surely become essential from the moment you put the device on.
SAvAge LOve Q:
I’m a bi
woman in my mid-20s in a great monogamish relationship with my straight boyfriend. We occasionally invite other women into our sex life, which is really enjoyable for both of us. He isn’t threatened by other women, only by other men, which isn’t an issue since I’m not interested in any other men. So on the occasions when we find a lady we’re both into who’s also into us, anything goes, and it’s awesome. We’ve hooked up with both friends and strangers, but always as a couple because it makes us both feel safe. That’s all lovely. Enter the problem: I was visiting some friends of ours I used to live with before my boyfriend and I moved in together. After going out for drinks, we were playing an alcohol-fueled card game that turned into an alcohol-fueled strip card game. This is in my former home where I am very comfortable, feel safe, and was frequently in various states of undress while I was a housemate. One friend soon had her lovely breasts out, and she made a few comments that were direct and inviting and turned me on a little. I touched her boobs and sucked on her nipples, but that’s as far as things went. Her boyfriend witnessed this but wasn’t involved. It was a fun, playful moment, and soon after, I went to bed—alone. It wasn’t anything my boyfriend would’ve objected to had he been there, but he wasn’t there. Should I tell him about it, or is this a case where he has the right not to know? I’m not interested in pursuing anything further with this friend, and I’m
not sure what talking about it would accomplish, other than being honest at the expense of my boyfriend’s feelings, and probably making me feel bad for something that, although it seemed innocent and harmless in the moment, I shouldn’t have done. Non-Intentional Playful Partying Lady Experiences Situation
This experience would seem to fall in the “right not to know” column, NIPPLES, but “right not to know” always has to be weighed against “likelihood of finding out.” You indicate that this couple— the girl with the lovely, direct, and inviting breasts (LDIBs), and the boy who witnessed the touching and sucking of said LDIBs— aren’t just friends of yours, NIPPLES, but friends of “ours.” If either of them makes a reference to this game of strip cribbage—or strip Uno or strip poker or strip Schnapsen—the next time the four of you hang out, the boyfriend could be blindsided. And it’s not clear whether there were other witnesses to your drunken touch-and-suck. But if there were others there, and if you socialize with these other witnesses IRL or online, the chances that your boyfriend will find out increase exponentially. You know your boyfriend better than I do, NIPPLES, so you’ll have to ask yourself if finding out about the incident at a party or via a snarky Facebook post would leave him feeling twice as upset— because then we’re talking about a crime and a cover-up, and learning about the LDIBs inci-
THE URBANITE » URBANITENEWS.COM » DEC. 4, 2013 » 18
dent in a manner (from a friend, in front of other people) that leaves him feeling humiliated.
My boyfriend of nearly a year and I live together and are planning to move across the country in about a month. We have never fought and get along swimmingly. We have amazing sex, we see eye to eye on almost everything, and we are planning a future together. The only thing is, we have never said, “I love you,” to each other. Is this normal? I know we love each other, but being in a serious, committed relationship of almost a year and not saying those words? Could it be possible that he doesn’t love me? Hopefully Not Unlovable
Even if your boyfriend had said, “I love you,” a hundred thousand times over the last year, HNU, it would still be possible that he didn’t love you. People have been known to lie about this shit. But I don’t think a guy would move across the country or plan a future with a woman for whom he felt nothing. Either he already loves you but hasn’t found the right moment to say so, or he’s sensible enough to realize that you can’t be certain that you’re in love with someone until after you’ve had at least one fight. That said, HNU, if you’re ready to say it to him, go ahead and say it. Just don’t have a meltdown if he’s not ready—yet—to say it to you.
Say you’ve always wanted to peg a guy, but your otherwise GGG hot husband isn’t into receiving anal—for good reason
(he’s had health problems back there)—but he jokingly suggests he would be fine with you pegging his equally hot gay little brother. Should you ask his gay little brother if you can peg him? Wanting It For Evah
How stupid would it be to sleep with my boss’s gorgeous 18-year-old son? My boss has become a mentor to me. He and his wife have welcomed me into their home, which includes their aforementioned son, a high-school senior. I am a 23-year-old woman. Normally, I wouldn’t sleep with anyone younger than 20. But besides being very attractive, my boss’s son is funny, kind, and sweet. He’s also incredibly horny and has some serious unexplored kinks that most girls his age have no interest in. I want to spend the next few months fucking my boss’s son—bearing in mind and honoring, of course, your campsite rule. Here are the two problems as I see them: (1) Fucking around with your boss’s kid seems a surefire way to seriously wreck your relationship with your boss. (2) He is still in high school. Sex Or Not
Even if your boyfriend 1. Fucking your boss’s kid seems like a surefire way to get your ass fired, SON, and depending on what field you’re in—and how important good recommendations and work histories are in your field—fucking the boss’s son could seriously derail your career.
If, you know, you manage to get caught. But if you do decide to fuck the shit out of a gorgeous, funny, sweet, and kinky adult who happens to be your boss’s son, well, you wouldn’t be the first person in human history to risk everything for sex. As Mark Twain observed more than a century ago: “The human being, like the immortals, naturally places sexual intercourse far and away above all other joys—yet he has left it out of his heaven! The very thought of it excites him; opportunity sets him wild; in this state, he will risk life, reputation, everything—even his queer heaven itself—to make good that opportunity and ride it to the overwhelming climax.” 2. He is an adult—who is still in high school. You are not that far out of high school. Math is hard for me, SON, but according to my calculations, you’re not that far apart in age. You might be sabotaging your career, but you wouldn’t be robbing the cradle. 3. The campsite rule for new readers: The older and/or more experienced person in a sexual relationship with a large age and/ or experience gap is obligated to leave their younger and/or less experienced partner in better shape than when they found them. That means no sexually transmitted infections, no fertilized eggs, no unnecessary drama, and no unnecessary trauma. Find the Savage Lovecast weekly podcast every Tuesday at savagelovecast.com.
» BY DAN SAVAGE » MAIL@SAVAGELOVE.NET » @FAKEDANSAVAGE
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THE URBANITE » URBANITENEWS.COM » DEC. 4, 2013 » 19
FIND AND SUBmIT eveNTS AT Walkerville Theatre | 1 p.m. URBANITeNeWS.COm/eveNTS
COmINg Up WeDNeSDAy, DeC. 4 Zine Night with Rosina Riccardo Broken City Lab | 7 p.m.
Broken City Brawlers Fresh Meat Information Centre 2013-2014 WFCU Bank | 2800 Tecumseh Rd. E. | 2 p.m. The Locusts Have No King acoustic trio Taloola Cafe | 8 p.m.
Tecumseh Holiday Bazaar The Miniature Show Tecumseh Vista Academy | 9 a.m. Backroom Artist Gallery | until Dec. 24 - 4 p.m.
ThURSDAy, DeC. 5 The Urbanite Launch Party City Cyclery | 7 p.m. Brian Burke Quartet Phog Lounge | doors 9 p.m. | PWYC Blog Party Broken City Lab | 7 p.m. Typhoon Haiyan Benefit Concert Capitol Theatre | $20 Repeal Night 2013 Sugar House, Detroit | 5 p.m. Comedy Night Live Villains Beastro | PWYC
FRIDAy, DeC. 6
Christmas in Las Vegas Chrysler Theatre | 7:30 p.m. Stephen Harper: The Musical Mackenzie Hall | 8 p.m. | $15 ADV $18 ATG
SUNDAy, DeC. 8 Fall For Art Show Riverside Library | 1 p.m. - 4 p.m. Something Cold w/ DJ Saint Nancy Whiskey, Detroit | 10 p.m. Stephen Harper: The Musical Mackenzie Hall | 2 p.m. | $15 ADV $18 ATG
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SB Contemporary | 3:30 p.m. - 5 p.m. mas Concert assumption University Chapel | 7 p.m. FRIDAy, DeC. 13 After Work Party w/Eric Myskow Rino’s Kitchen | 7 p.m. The Obbit: An H’Original ‘Oliday Panto Kordazone Theatre | 8 p.m. | $10$15 DJ DOUBLE A (Halifax) Phog Lounge | doors 9 p.m. Told Pops: Holiday Pops with Mark Windsor symphony orchestra | 8 p.m. Three Days Grace WFCU Centre | 7 p.m. Daniel Sylvester stand-up comedy Comedy Quarry | Rockhead Pub | 9 p.m. Allison Brown and Dan Belgue Merlis’ | Kingsville | 6 p.m. Live Wire Fridays: Dave Russell and the Precious Stones EP release w/ Leighton Bain Band, Dogtone & Cowboys Fighting Indians Venue Music Hall | 9 p.m. | $10
Christmas in Las Vegas Ward 7 byelection | multiple polling Chrysler Theatre | 7:30 p.m. Dora the Explorer Live! locations The WFCU Centre | doors 5:30 p.m. SATURDAy, DeC. 14 | $25.25-$34.25
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Pitch Union w/ Crawl & Life Astray Dominion House | 9 p.m. Notes To Self (Toronto) Phog Lounge | doors 9 p.m. 2nd Annual Holiday Party Biblioasis | 5 - 9 p.m.
Original Six Dynasties: The Detroit Red Wings book launch Walkerville Tavern | 7 p.m. sean nicholas savage (Montreal) w/ Tops, James linck, Magic Pony & DJ Jamaican Queens | PJ’s lager House, Detroit | $6
32nd Annual Doin’ The Louvre Holiday Fundraising Exhibition Artcite Inc. | until Dec. 24
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Live Wire Fridays: Guitar Army Venue Music Hall | 9 p.m.
Tegan and Sara w/ Walk Off the Earth Fillmore Detroit
Christmas in Las Vegas Chrysler Theatre | 7:30 p.m.
Christmas in Las Vegas Chrysler Theatre | 7:30 p.m.
Sarah Smith Carparelli Sound Lounge | $5 ADV
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Coast Redwood (Sudbury) w/ The Spooky But Nice & Good Things Phog Lounge | doors 9 p.m.
Drinks of Walkerville Walking Tour Canadian Club Brand Heritage Centre | 2 p.m. - 5:30 p.m. | $45 The Dead Samaritans Phog Lounge | doors 9 p.m. Fall For Art Show Riverside Library | 10 a.m. - 4 p.m. Fresh Breath album release party w/ Grit Lounge | Dominion House | 9 p.m. | $5 ADV $10 ATG
Indulge: A Tasting Experience Overseas Motors BMW Mini Showroom | 6 p.m. | $40 Kyle McBee w/ Tinder Tiger, Carjack, Black Lodge, Future Slang, Factory Girls | PJ’s Lager House, Detroit | $5 Christmas in Las Vegas Chrysler Theatre | 7:30 p.m.
The Obbit: An H’Original ‘Oliday Panto Kordazone Theatre | 8 p.m. | $10$15 The Nature Boys (Toronto) w/ James O-L and the Villains Phog Lounge | doors 9 p.m. The Vaudvillianaires w/ HellBros! (Ottawa) & Diesel Junkies Dominion House | 9 p.m. Told Pops: Holiday Pops with Mark Windsor symphony orchestra | 8 p.m. Free Family Holiday Film Theatre: The Grinch Who Stole Christmas Walkerville Theatre | 1 p.m. Broken City Brawlers Fresh Meat Information Centre 2013-2014 Dominion House | 2 p.m.
SUNDAy, DeC. 15 The Obbit: An H’Original ‘Oliday Panto Kordazone Theatre | 2 p.m. | PWYC Kenny Rogers Colosseum @ Caesars Windsor | 8 p.m. | $35.25-$70.65 Told Pops: Holiday Pops with Mark Windsor symphony orchestra | 2:30 p.m.
S.M.U.T. 7 dance night Villains Beastro | 10 p.m.
Open Studio – Mixed Media w/ Sarah Beveridge Virginia’s leaf SB Contemporary | 9:30 a.m. 12 p.m. Walkerville brewery
Free Family Holiday Film Theatre: Little Women
Open Studio – Mixed Media w/ Sarah Beveridge
mONDAy, DeC. 16 Windsor Community Choir Christ-
TUeSDAy, DeC. 17 TOAST Open Mic Poetry Phog Lounge | doors 9 p.m.
WeeKLy MONDAYS Open Mic Surgery w/ James O-L Phog Lounge | doors 9 p.m. TUESDAYS Open Stage Night w/ Year’s of Ernest Dominion House | 5 p.m. V.O.M.I.T. (Vocal Original Music Instrumental Talent) Villains Beastro WEDNESDAYS Wacky Wexican Wednesdays w/ Dee Russ Dominion House | 5 p.m. P.U.K.E. (People Using Karaoke Equipment) Villains Beastro The Groove Trio FM Lounge | 8 p.m. THURSDAYS Celtic Night w/ Mark Crampsie Dominion House | 5 p.m. FRIDAYS Loveless Fridays w/ Daniel Victor The Loop | 10 p.m.
ONgOINg Mistletoe & Snow: A Members Holiday Sale and Show ArtSpeak Gallery | Dec. 6 - 20 32nd Annual Doin’ The Louvre Holiday Fundraising Exhibition Artcite Inc. | until Dec. 24 Holiday Hodge Podge Mudpuppy Gallery | Amherstburg | until Dec. 22 The Miniature Show Backroom Artist Gallery | until Dec. 22 Other Electricities: Works from the AGW Collection Art Gallery of Windsor | until Jan. 5
CELEBRATE THE LAUNCH OF WINDSORâ€™S NEWEST COMMUNITY PUBLICATION THUrSdAY, deCemBer 5, 2013 drinks, food, music & fun starting at 7 p.m. @ CITY CYCLerY 553 Lincoln Rd., Windsor (@ Wyandotte St.) for more information: 226.674.0140 email@example.com