UIM Celebrates the Life of Notorious Big
Issue Ever! With continuation of “The Heart “ special feature!
A Letter from Our Editor Dear Readers, Welcome to another issue of Urban Image Magazine. It is always a pleasure for us to deliver fresh content to your fingertips. I am so proud what our writers and our layout designer have put together for your reading enjoyment. As I watched the 4 part VH1 special, Hip-Hop: The Tanning of America, it hit me that the majority of our readership can't get over the music produced by the 90's. This month Larrod Evans honors the legacy of Biggie Smalls. And as I read his article, he took me back to a time when music was music. Rappers were rappers and R&B artist made music you could make love to. Of course, rappers like Biggie Smalls helped make the ongoing collaboration between R&B acts and Hip-Hop artist popular, but nowadays when I hear alot of R&B music I'm confused. I don't know whether to reach for my girl or reach for my gun. But he made me reminisce, I enjoyed the article so much that i asked him to do a story on an artist or group from the nineties every month. So, everybody get ready for him to cover Jodeci in April. I hope ya'll are enjoying our new look and new site. Leave some comments, let Jeff know what you think. He put alot of hours into it to enhance your experience with Urban Image. Be sure to check out the live wire chat were you can conversate with others who are viewing our site and leave for viewpoint on current topics. Any questions or comments don't hesitate to contact us at; Info@UrbanImageMagazine.com. Enjoy Peace and Love,
CEO & Editor-in-Chief: Richarh Aswanu President: Denetra Key Vice President: Internet, Web Design & Technical Support: Jeff McCollum Vice President & Editorial: E. AhDai Assistant Vice President: Taylor Danes
CFO: Richard Tyson & Damika Smith Marketing /Social Media: Nhea Duncan & Shuntez Darden Senior Writers: E. AhDai, Deszion Nasir, E.N.Joy Kimberley Jasper, , Comedian Marc Howard, Angela Williams, Patrice Rivers, AJ Whitsett Contributors: Don Savant, Larrod Evans, Magazine Layout Design: Denetra Key Cover Design: Denetra Key
Meet Our Staff Hello, my name is Denetra “Queen GangstaLit” Key better known as D Queen or Boss Ladii. I am the president here at Urban Image. I am a mother of three and also a 15 year nurse by profession. I also am our magazine layout designer… so I hope you enjoy my art. There are some topics that arise in life that strike a cord with me and I will write on those issues. My articles and blogs are to shed light on issues that are dear to my heart! I apologize in advance if I offend. But my pieces are based on my opinion. In addition to providing you with thought proOur opinions reflect that we are individuvoking content, Urban Image Magazine will showcase talents who haven’t had the opportuni- al children of God. One promise I can make is that I will report on the topics of ty to reach mainstream media outlets. Urban my choice in as accurate fashion as I can. Image Magazine was founded as a life changing I welcome you to leave your comments movement for all that are involved in our misgood or bad in regards to my work. I acsion. We are a stage for those without a platform tually appreciate it! Your views give me to have a spotlight. Published to be accessible insight. online, this magazine is designed to serve as a Thank you for visiting our page. While catalyst to success, a place where you can netyour here please take the time to browse work with like-minded people who are in pursuit around and look at our past magazines of their dreams. and blogs. Thanks again and God Bless! My name is Richarh Aswanu AKA Daddy Rich. I am the CEO and founder here at Urban Image Magazine and GangstatLit. Writing is not a phase in my life, it defines who I am. I’m a man on a mission. I want my freedom! This is why I write! I have been locked down for 8 years but have published 3 books thus far. I have my own style that separates me from other authors. I created Urban Image to serve as a publication you can be proud of. It is our aim to dissolve the negative stereotypes associated with the “Urban Community”. We will inform, educate, entertain and inspire our readers.
EmiajAhdai is Deszion Amani Nasir was born from Greensbo- in raised in ro, North Caro- Hampton, VA, where she lina. She is our penned her Fashion and first novel in the 6th grade Arts Blogger, when her simour Managing ple ideas were read by others Editor and reand she was told "Wow... this is good. cently promoted to Vice President. She is currently You should be a writer." The light bulb clicked on and never turned off. In 2012 working on her first novel, and is a contributor to Nasir debuted her first novel, "Untrust," LAID: Young Peopleâ€™s Experiences with sex in an easy the strange tale of an unusual set of twins with no family, yet more family access culture. She brings us a unique look on love drama than oneâ€™s ever deem possible. and relationships through her Single and Ready to Then she released, "Dragonflies & Demons," part one of a short series about a Mingle blog and her column Ask Emiaj. This little couple stuck in a vicious cycle of dowoman wears a lot of hats but she has a big heart. You mestic violence that blurs the lines bewould never believer that she started out just blogging tween victim and abuser. After that, the follow-up of "Untrust" entitled "Wicked with us in her spare time. She believes in hard work Blues," dropped in November. She is and dedication will pay off in the end. Look for her currently writing her first paranormal/ sci-fi novel, "Sariah," which is due to be name among the stars. released in the Spring. This excitingly eerie novel will come out in the Spring. Nasir is currently in the works to drop an Anthology with two other authors that will be released in June. The next installment to her series, Uncommon Devil, will be released in the Fall.
KIMBERLEY R. JASPER was raised in Jamaica Queens, New York and still describes herself as a true New Yorker through and through despite currently residing in Humble, Texas with her family.
self-publishing her first novel, she is now fulfilling her purpose and passion as a writer.
From horror fic-
tion with a mystical twist to erotic thrillers, this author can do it all with well -seasoned finesse.
Angela Williams is just now beginning to explore the possibilities opened to her. She is an avid reader who sometimes lets her imagination run wild. A lover of animals she shares living space with two dogs and a cantankerous cat. No stranger to being told what canâ€™t be done she tries to empower those around her. She believes that youâ€™re never late for your dream, you always arrive right on time. At the present time she is residing in Chesapeake, VA and working on a book of poetry.
Patrice “Lyrical Passion” Rivers started her writing career at an early age of nine. With her vivid imagination, she started writing short fiction stories, then as years passed, her love for poetry took a full effect at the age of fifteen. Writing has always been a part of Lyrical Passion and believed that it was a gift from God. To seal the real deal, she published her first book, “A Collection of God’s Word and Motivation” in May 2012. As Lyrical continues her passion of writing poetry and stories, she hopes to succeed in what she does as an author, poet and blogger. Her second book “Lyrical Passion Tears from my Inkwell” was recently published November 2013. She now is working on her third book entitled “My Journey with Sickle Cell Disease” which will be released 2014. She was temporarily a blogger for Nlistic Media Soldiers sharing the beauty of her poetry, but now Patrice currently blogs and is a senior writer for Urban Image Magazine where she posts for the Dating and Relationships blog and is committed in submitting articles every month that covers various topics of interest. She is also a blogger for Black Bloggers Connect and a columnist for Pen’Ashe Magazine.
We at Urban Image are always looking for new talent . If you are interested in joining our team or submitting for the monthly magazine please hit us up at : email@example.com.
What’s Inside Letter from Editor……………………………………………….
Meet Our Staff……………………………………………………
My Perspective on Mr. Small………………………………
You a Side Chick: You Don’t Matter…………………….
7 Ways to Keep Drama Away From You & Your Man.24 Poetic Justice Joint……………………………………………
The Urban Alter…………………………………………………
Ten Secrets Men & Women Keep from Each Other. 40 Looking Deep into the Heart………………………………. 48 Test your “Biggie” Knowledge…………………………….
UIM’s Friends and Fam Speak Their Minds Forum.. 78 L.O.C. That Hair Down………………………………………… 83 Deszion’s Star Design………………………………………….. 88 UIM’s What’s the Word Mix-Up………………………….. 92 Ask Emiaj……………………………………………………………. 95 UIM’s Under the Concrete………………………………….. 99 Remembering Royalty…………………………………………109
MY PERSPECTIVE ON MR. SMALLS By: Angela Williams
I am not a listener of the rap/hip- who were they paying tribute to hop genre. It has never been on and who was the guy in the puffy my top ten list of favorite types white suit. They told me it was of music. So when the opporPuff and Mase remembering Bigtunity arose to write about Big- gie Smalls. My narrow minded gie Smalls I jumped at it. I knew answer was … “Oh, the thug more about his death and very who got killed recently.” And that little about is all I knew his life or Sky’s the limit and you know that you keep then. Now in the music. The present day I on plan was to Just keep on pressin on would have to immerse my- Sky’s the limit and you know that you can step out of my self in his music comfort work and get zone and learn to know his music. Unfortunate- about Christopher Wallace aka ly, after only 60 seconds I did Biggie Smalls aka Big Poppa aka what I always did with rap…. I The Notorious B.I.G. turned it off. Even for an assignI started reading up on him. ment and a learning experience I Somehow I was not surprised couldn’t force myself to listen. that he was an excellent student I had to think of a different and won awards in English. I way to approach this. My first was a bit surprised that his earliencounter with his music came er music influences were jazz shortly after his death in 1997 music and musicians. Not inwhen I was watching the Ameri- credibly shocked that he started can Music Awards. I recall askselling drugs at the age of 12 ing those in the room with me and dropped out of school at 17.
a drug charge, but he wasn’t really serious about it surprised me a bit. When they featured it The Source for the unsigned and Sean “Puffy” Combs signed him that was interesting. I went on to read that he still sold drugs in order to take care of his daughter, but Sean Combs made him quit. The thing that saddened me was that he still lived in fear of people out to get him because of the past and his success. So now I knew a little bit about him and now I had to find a way to get into his music. I am a poet. I love the written word. So the common ground between me and his music would be to read the words he wrote and go from there. In essence he was a poet, a storyteller and a spoken word artist who dressed his message in a danceable beat and a catchy hook. So I started to read. Juicy taught me that he never forgot where he came from no matter how rich he got. Warning was his way of saying you never truly leave your past. Notorious B.I.G. made me realize he listened to a bit of everything because he sampled a bit of Duran Duran’s Notorious. The most chilling one to me was Suicidal Thoughts. I can’t believe suicide’s on my fuckin’ mind I want to leave, I swear to God I feel like death is fuckin’ callin’ me
Naw you wouldn’t understand This showed that not only did he think of death from others, but also death coming from his hands. His words were deep. They painted a picture of the life he lived and not some made up scenarios. I quickly learned that the use of “bitch” and “nigga” weren’t just thrown in gratuitously because he had to use them in order to express himself. I did ask a few people how they felt about his work and all said the same thing…. He was deep. They talked about how he adapted to the styles of others that he recorded with and how he was quick to adlib a line if it made the song better. When I went back to listen I saw all of this and once I peeled back the throbbing bass I saw the jazz influences. I quickly became a fan of his lyrics and his music. He was changing the rap genre in a subtle way. He had a message in his words and in order to get you to hear it he clothed it in a danceable beat and a catchy chorus. He treated rap as a venue to tell a story, have some fun and keep hopeful. The night that bullet found him was the night the intelligence of rap gave way to the violence of rap. He was a man of the streets, who knew about the streets, but also knew that things could change. He
started off rough around the edges, but over time the edges were smoothed. He was still who he was and never ashamed of it. He used his lyrics to tell a story, to discuss vital topics faced in the black community and have a little fun. This man has been dead for over ten years and yet his music still gets sampled by a whoâ€™s who of the music world including Michael Jackson. He is still having an impact after death. That is the mark of a true artist. Iâ€™m still not a rap fan, but I am a fan of the words of Biggie Smalls.
Excellence is my presence. Never tense, never hesitant.~ Biggie Smalls
You a Side Chick! You Don’t Matter! By:Patrice Rivers
It seems like relationships are turning into daily disasters; at least some of them. Are people actually committing with anyone or having a proper wedding? All I hear about now are side chicks taking over! Or at least they are trying to destroy something that wasn’t there’s in the first place! As some of you may know, Being Mary Jane, one of the most popular reality shows out right now has taken Gabrielle Union on an adventure when it comes to real, deep-fulfilling love and a hint of lust. Yes she portrays herself as the ultimate “side chick,” but she keeps it together when pouring out her true feelings for a man that she loves—even
if he is married. But ask yourself this ladies? Is it really worth the drama and trouble to tear a woman’s marriage apart by sleeping with him and pretending to be something you not? No side chick is worth tearing kids apart and watching the mother and wife suffer while another woman comes into the picture controlling. What happened to the real relationships that involved commitment, cuddle time, long, passionate kisses and communication? I guess the new generation is filled with lazy women who ra
ther steal another woman’s treasure without actually waiting for God to bless them with the right one. I shake my head at the side chick syndrome that appears to be going on because as side chicks you really aren’t important-only in the bedroom and for pleasure. He doesn’t take you out to expensive restaurants or bring you around his boys or family. You aren’t worthy enough for that special place in his heart; only his main chick is. Any woman that is willing to settle for less is setting themselves up for failure and trust me, your relationship with the man you think loves you will crash and burn. Ladies, don’t portray your image or body to end up with a man who only wants your body and to use you up
for your good looks. You deserve much better and so much more than a thirsty trap guy who doesn’t give a damn! I just don’t understand why any woman wants a man of low standards instead of a man that is respectful, going somewhere in life, loyal and honest. Don’t rely on a man to provide for you or depend on a man to love you when you can love yourself the way God has intended you to. Low selfesteem is spreading across the nation, and within women who feels lonely and alone because they don’t have a man in their lives to love them gets taken advantage of and wonder why they don’t trust men anymore. I don’t care how lonely you are or if you have been single for years, don’t give a
man a reason to be with you just because you are vulnerable. There have been so many incidents on social media, especially Facebook where young women put it out there that they are lonely. And when some men see that, they automatically think that is their cue to flirt with her and spit her a few lines hoping to “score.” My advice for black women; all women is to keep being strong and remember you don’t have to become a “side chick” just to get what you want. Side chicks don’t experience the “real love” only what that guy wants her to feel. Never settle for less and don’t give in to temptation when you start to feel like you are lonely (even if you are), don’t let a man see that side of you! Ev-
er! Be happy within relationships and true love and remember that side chicks are nothing but trouble and drama. Now the show Being Mary Jane, I feel she wants to be loved and feel love from a man that she never had. So even when she found out David was seeing someone else or when she found out Andre was married, it didn’t stop her because she liked being the ultimate side chick even though it tore his marriage a part with Avery. Ladies, this is only a show, but in reality let’s not portray that image or become that person. Let’s be patient with ourselves and wait on God to bless us with a King instead of chasing after a fling! Be blessed!
7 Ways to Keep Drama Away From You and Your Man By Richarh Aswanu
This photo right here has been credited by many as taking the beef between Biggie and Tupac to another level. Faith Evans has always maintained that it was "just a picture" and nothing ever happened. One account in the media even stated that her intentions were to smooth things out between the two. Was it "innocent", her bumping into Tupac and taking the photo? Or, was she simply naive, never considering the effect the snapshot would have on her husband? Was she mad at Biggie's philandering ways and decided to get revenge? Or, was she the victim of a calculating tactician who used her as a pawn in the most notable rap beef in history? We'll never know, but I'm sure if Faith could do it all over again the picture wouldn't exist. Just listen and learn ladies, follow these 7 steps to keep drama away from you and your man; 1) Don't associate with any of your man's enemies or competition. There is absolutely no reason for it. Its scandalous and disloyal. 2) If you're in a relationship, act like it! You don't have to be rude or stuck up. But, keep your interaction with men professional and brief, anything else opens up the door for interpretations. When a woman is truly serious about her relationship, she's gives off an energy that says she's unavailable. Most men won't even approach her, note that I said most. In the event you are approached, set boundaries immediately. 3) Always remember, men are very pretentious creatures. In the male community we have a saying, "If she'll wink, she'll fuck." We believe this statement whole heartedly. We think any
woman who puts a little extra sparkle in her smile wants to sleep with us. So keep that in mind when dealing with the opposite sex.
4) Never discuss your relationship issues with another man (or with your girlfriends while another man is present). While you may be "just venting", your male counterpart see's it as a weakness in ya'lls bond and he will exploit it at the most opportune time. 5) Never be alone with a man you are not in a relationship with. Period-Point-Blank. Unless, your job requires it. If so, refer to rules 2 and 3. Under other circumstances be sure you're in a group setting. A house party with your home girls won't hold any weight at all. Especially, if you've constantly been telling him how your girls bash your relationship. 6) Do NOT get into physical or verbal altercations with other men. This is dangerous! Always be a lady. (Yes, stay in your place. Lol). You'll put your man in the position to either go to prison or get hurt. I know a dude who's incarcerated right now for shooting someone over his woman. And guess where she's at...with another man. Smh. 7) The Golden Rule; don't say or do anything you wouldn't do if your man was right in front of you.
Emiaj Ah Dai Angela Williams Don Savant
Cowards, Bellies, Cowards,Yellow Yellow Belliesand andPunks Punks By E. AhDai
You sir are not fit for this side of the world, well not fit for my world at least Why are you such a… such a scary cat (insert other word) Oh go run, run like the little girl that you are, don’t forget to tuck your tail. Because I know you are not going to answer that one question, but I have a series of them Like… SO why did you lie, why do have fears, did you fear that I would Oh hell nevermind I find it awesomely funny how the person with the loudest voice is always the weakest and have jelly for insides You lack the courage of a real man… Let me Repeat YOU LACK THE COURAGE OF A REAL MAN See a real man will shot it straight no chaser And you suffer from bitch made qualities Real men don’t run from challenges of the world; they face them head on Conquer them, and come out on top of the world See you are a coward. And this is here isn’t OZ so there is no wizard to give courage Look at you sitting there pretending to be the king of this jungle
Let me dethrone you; snatch your balls because you don’t need them Hell I have better use for them than you do. Maybe I can show what to do them You should change your name to Woosie boy... Yeah that sure fits How could you ever protect me…? Hell I am better protecting myself Please take your place as the bottom of the food chain because that is where you belong Men are placed here to protect the women and children So why in the blue hell do I feel so unsafe with you? Please sit your ass down Shut up also because I am talking You sorry excuse of a man So you like to tell lies, Yellow bellies tell lies; fearing that someone will find out how soft they are. But it never last for long You are a waste of space… I am done now…
BABY GIRL By Angela Williams Sweet Baby Girl, just listen to me. Hear my words… please. You look at me and say I’m hard on you and I don’t understand anything you’re going through. On the contrary my little one I understand everything you’re going through. Daily you’re faced with peer pressure. Constantly being told what to do to fit in and be accepted. You struggle with your choices, so desperate to be accepted. Knowing every time you bow to the pressure a piece of you is lost. At night you cry because your so called friends degrade you and rob you of your self-esteem. I admit I’m hard on you simply because I love you. Looking at you I see all the beauty you possess. A brilliant mind filled with knowledge, eager for the opportunity to enlighten those in your presence. A heart filled with love waiting to be unlocked to burst forth and shower others with love.
you simply because I love you. Looking at you I see all the beauty you possess. A brilliant mind filled with knowledge, eager for the opportunity to enlighten those in your presence. A heart filled with love waiting to be unlocked to burst forth and shower others with love.
Love Is Love is… Every time I Look into your eyes and That indescribable feeling Courses through Every fiber of my existence… Love is… The lingering whisper that I hear constantly That plays over and over Between the last time And the next time I’m blessed to Witness your smile… Love is… The scent of your vocals As they Brush across my ear... When you whisper to me softly...The sound of your intentions, When you look me in the eyes With that Look That only you and I see and understand Love is… The way you Interpret my smile as you smile in return... And I love that No matter how far Or how long we may be apart, You are still located within me...forever. Love.
Love is… The sweet music that passes between You and I… And every time I feel it I can hear the sweet Whiny and nasal sound of Al Green Crooning the words… That define Who And what we are To one another Established And maintained by God Love is…
The Urban Altar “More Than Enough” By BLESSEDselling Author E.N. Joy
I’ll get straight to the point with this article. There is more than enough! There, I said it. There are more than enough books out there for readers to read, and more importantly, there are more than enough readers out there for every author’s book to be read. Between the physical bookstore shelves and the cyber bookstore shelves-Yes- there is even enough room on the bookstore shelves for each and every book that will ever be published. Romans 13:9 says “Thou shall not covet.” How many people actually know what that commandment means? It means that we will not want and seek after what the other person has. If we are all supposedly trying our best to obey God’s word, then why is it that we always want what the other person has? And do you know what that leads to? It
leads to envy, jealousy and anger. And each of these emotions stem from fear. What are authors afraid of? They are afraid of another author selling more books than them, or in other words, taking food from their mouths. But keep in mind how many people Jesus fed with those two fish and those fives loaves of bread in the New Testament’s Book of Mark. Two fish and five loaves of bread didn’t seem like much for thousands of hungry mouths. But guess what? It was more than enough. There were even leftovers. There are many authors who think that once another author hits the scene and starts doing well, especially if that person writes in the same genre as them, then it’s going to take away their limelight; it’s going to take away their book sells and people are going to stop
reading their books to read this other author’s book. I can’t continue to express the fact that there are more than enough readers out there for every author’s book to get read. Maybe some author’s books won’t get read by as many readers as other authors’ books, but so what. Take what God gives you and keep pressing on until it’s your turn in the spot light. Don’t try to steal someone else’s moment in the limelight. As author Tonya Marie Evans would say, “Find Your Own Shine.”
fore who never wrote me back.” Earn a nice following so that you don’t even have to second guess whether or not when your books drop, a dedicated following will continue to support you.
Maybe by continuously adding other authors to the scene that are relentless in their promotional efforts, therefore making a name for themselves, God is trying to pull more out of you as an author than you have been willing to give in the past. Accept the challenge and continue to write and promote even So for any author out there who is deal- greater works. And when the next auing with this syndrome of feeling as thor makes the bestsellers list, start celthough there isn’t enough room in the ebrating and shouting for joy knowing literary world for multiple authors to that you are next in line. achieve success (even in the same gen- I know that sometimes it takes a great re), allow me to assure you that people effort to celebrate someone else’s victoaren’t going to stop reading your books ry when it seems like you have been just because another author enters the struggling so long to make it happen for literary world. And if you are so inseyourself, especially knowing that there cure as to think so, then step your game are a lot of authors out there who are up. Form a rapport with your reading just outright mean, manipulative and set fans. Be humble towards them at book out to destroy others so that they can signings and reply to their emails. I “have it all.” But I still say to you, celecan’t tell you how many times a reader brate and shout for joy for them, besends me an email and when I reply to it cause remember, the wealth of the they write back, “Thank you for rewicked is laid out to the righteous. God sponding. I’ve written other authors be- can simply be using that person to set
up the foundation for your own victories and achievements. I’ll mention in forthcoming Urban Altar columns how some jealous and envious authors create an army to assist them in tearing down other authors because of the success they are having in the industry. If you are one of those authors being sought after by such cruel intentions, just hold on. God will keep for you all of the things you might lose during the battle, and then He will double it (sometimes triple or bring it ten-fold) once you come through the battle. That is why we must always trust in God that we will receive what is promised to us. So don’t stoop as to start bashing another author or form an army of your own in retaliation. Just stand on God’s word and continue to work diligently and with integrity, for Psalms 84:11 says that “No good thing will He withhold from them that walk uprightly.” I recall when street lit first came back strong. The African American contemporary authors were fit to be tied. They insulted both the authors of these works and the works themselves. There was article after article, panel after panel discussing how street lit was “bad for this”
and “glorifying that.” Although some of these authors truly might have been trying to make a statement, what we got out of most of them was that their books weren’t selling like they used to, so therefore they were hatin’ on and throwing salt at the sleuth of New Jack Authors. Their tactics were very unsuccessful might I add. It wasn’t that these contemporary mainstream author’s books weren’t selling, it was because their books weren’t selling as fast as they wanted them to. But that’s only natural. When there’s more food added on your dinner plate to eat, it takes a little longer to get to dessert. Their readers didn’t disappear, they were just checking out the food at the new restaurant in town. Is the industry littered with a certain genre of books? I used to think so, but that was until I realized that God always wants there to be an overflow. Not just of books and readers; I’m only saying that because books and readers is what this particular article relates to. But God wants us to have an abundance and overflow of everything in life. Why? So that there will be more than enough….of everything….including
books!I just want to end this article by letting authors out there know that they should worry less about what another author is doing or how many books another author is selling and focus on “getting theirs” and know that what God has done for another author, He can do for them as well. And remember what God said to Able who was jealous of his brother Caine: “Will I not do for you
what I have done for your brother?” God is able to bless everybody! This is BLESSEDselling Author E.N. Joy sounding off and reminding you to: “Stay blessed…because you already are!” If you have any comments regarding this article or any of my past Urban Altar columns, please feel free to email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and visit me at www.enjoywrites.com.
TEN SECRETS MEN AND WOMEN KEEP FROM EACH OTHER By: Kimberley Jasper
We all have secrets that we prefer to just keep to ourselves. Men and women, no matter how long you’ve been dating or how long you’ve known each other, it’s more than likely that there are a few things that you have not told each other. Some things you may never tell. Here are 10 secrets that men and women keep from each other.
1. HE HAS MONEY ISSUES Men are protective leaders and like to be the breadwinners of the family so rarely will they admit that they are having money issues. There is a degree of insecurity when their finances aren’t in check and the feeling only multiplies when he has to admit it to the woman he loves. Men are supposed to be the providers, and when a man feels like he’s failing at that, he’s likely to keep it to himself. Even if it’s not the cash flow, but his career path that has him feeling insecure, he may never tell you about it or may even divulge once it’s over and he ‘s doing better. Either way, it’s his personal struggle and a secret worth keeping to himself. 2. THAT A GOOD WOMAN MAKES HIM FEEL LIKE A BETTER MAN A man is always going to feel like a man, no doubt. But sometimes, a woman comes into their life and makes them feel like a better man, like he is THE man. Men feel amazing when a woman notices how strong he is or how well he handles his business. When a woman doesn’t recognize or acknowledge those qualities, a man can easily feel insecure about his role in her life. So although most men won’t admit it, he needs a good woman to make him feel like a better man.
3. THAT HE LIKES TO CUDDLE
There aren’t too many men that will readily admit that they like to cuddle. Cuddling is seen as being a feminine thing, but that is not true. He may act like he’s only doing it because you like it, but actually, he needs it too. Saying that he likes to cuddle is a big blow to his strong, tough manly side, so he is surely going to keep that to himself. When your man reaches over and pulls you tight, he’s not just doing it for you; he’s doing it for himself as well. 4. THAT SHE JUST WANTS ORAL A woman likes oral sex just as much if not more than you do. Most men think that once the relationship gets going strong, sex goes out the window and it’s “missionary” making love only. Not true. We still want to get our hair pulled, or our shoulders bitten, and you can still change positions after working the hell out of the middle. One thing that remains constant is the need for oral pleasure. What a woman may not tell you is that there are times, many more than she’ll admit, that she just wants oral. That two hour session you have in mind? Take 30 minutes (or more) of it and put in some oral work and you will have one very happy woman on your hands. You may never hear it escape her lips, but she’s thinking it every time you lick your lips or move your mouth. She just wants oral.
5. SHE LIKES TO SPEND TIME AWAY FROM YOU A common misconception and well-kept secret is that a woman wants to spend all of her time up under you. Not really. There are times when we just want to hang with our girls and be ourselves. That’s why we join book clubs where there is usually more drinking and chatting going on than reading. We just really want to hang with our girls and spend some time away from you. So we’re not always the cool, understanding woman when we support your guys night out or Saturday morning basketball games, we just want you out of the house. Most will never admit it, but sometimes we’re glad to see you go. 6. SHE DOESN’T THINK SHE’S FAT, SHE JUST WANTS A COMPLIMENT She hears it all the time, but she just really wants to hear it from you. You’re beautiful. Two simple words and like “I love you”, are just as elusive in your vocabulary. Take a moment to compliment her, tell her she looks good in that dress or that she has sexy legs and watch the smile that spreads across her face. She may drop hints or “fish” for a compliment all the while feeling that she shouldn’t have to. If you look up and she looks beautiful, tell her. Believe me, somebody already has, but yours is the compliment that counts. So next time, she asks “Do I look fat in this?” simply look up and say, “No, you look beautiful.”
7. SHE REALLY DOESN’T MIND IF YOU HANG OUT WITH YOUR BOYS It’s the perfect time for her to get some alone time, catch up on a good read and just chill. She acts like she’s disappointed, may even give you a little pout, but in her next breath she will smile and kiss you goodbye before you change your mind. After you leave, she does a little shimmy and skips away from the door like a kid being left home alone. She doesn’t want to get rid of you or do anything on the under, she just wants some time to herself. She may pretend to give you a hard time, but the truth is, she really doesn’t mind that you’re hanging out with your boys.
8. THAT HE HAS FAT DAYS TOO As women, we’re known to be extremely critical of ourselves. We’ve all had those mornings when we look in the mirror, pinch the love handles, check out grays or suck it in and stand up real straight. Most men will never admit it, but they do the same thing. We are not the only ones that have “fat days”, men experience it too. From beer bellies to a lack of muscle definition, men have similar body image insecurities to us. If you see a guy that has “let himself go” and he seems not to care, he does, he’s just hoping you don’t know he does.
9. MEN LIE, WOMEN LIE We call them little white lies and we have all told them. When it comes to keeping the peace, men are notorious for telling lies or withholding truths. It’s not a big deal, and we’re being honest, women do it too. If we know that the truth will hurt his feelings, we tend not to say anything at all and if he knows that you have a “hot button”, the he will do anything to avoid pushing it…even lie. These little infractions are harmless and both men and women are guilty of it.
10. SOMETIMES HE JUST WANTS YOU TO BE QUIET Unless a man is extremely rude, rarely will you find one that is willing to tell you that he just wants you to be quiet. Not forever, just for a little while. Men are terrible at multitasking so talking to him about next month’s plans while he’s trying to relax and watch TV is a no-go. He’s only half-listening and secretly wishing you would just shut up and let him unwind in peace. Truth be told, women want a little shuttin’ up from you as well.
LOOKING DEEP INTO THE HEART: AN ADDICTING NEW SERIES BY IRIS BOLLING By: Deszion A. Nasir Photography by Judith Doarsinvil/Deszion Nasir
February 8, 2014. It's a little after 2. The Virginia Museum Fine Arts Museum is bustling with activity. However, in the back of the museum, in a large screening room, a large group of casket-sharp people are anxiously awaiting the start of the much anticipated screening of the first episode of the intriguing book-turned television series by indie author Iris Bolling: The Heart, which will air for the first time on CW Richmond on February 15. Let's back up and do a little history check. What started off as a well-loved series by author Iris Bolling turned into a book trailer. But she wasn't satisfied. That book trailer was destined for greater things. A movie maybe? But how do you capture the essence of this powerful series within an hour and 24 minutes or so? No.. a bigger outlet is needed... An outlet like... like television. There was a casting call, 3 phases of auditions, hiring, a director was hired, as well as a production crew, and shooting began in October, on weekends, on Friday-Sunday. Iris invested the money from a year's profit from the series and the Kickstart fundraising to get the project rolling. And history was made. This a link to the kickstart page~~> https://www.kickstarter.com/ projects/769817080/the-heart-tv-series# Fast forward to the present: When I arrived, I was warmly greeted instantly, given a healthy gift bag, as was my photographer, full of goodies I'm definitely gonna tear into later:
We sat right behind where the cast would be sitting, and waited. The atmosphere was so lively, and despite starting slightly later than anticipated, everyone was hyped, hopeful and happy, showing the love and dedication everyone had to this project and to Iris Bolling, which was a feeling that only grew stronger as the night progressed. Photographers were everywhere as the beautiful cast came in, truly looking like a Hollywood event.. Author Loretta D Walls opened up with a greeting, thanking everyone for coming, her passion for this project deeply felt in her voice. Then director Daven Falkoner spoke, thanking everyone sincerely for the support everyone had given. His calming voice seemed to soothe the excited crowd. The bubbly voice of producer Nakia Smithers put a smile on everyone's faces as she said her thank yous.
Then the woman of the hour was introduced. Creator/executive producer Iris Bolling gracefully approached the podium to thunderous applause, her humbly bright smile endearing, welcoming. She brought her cast members up, and prayed a silent prayer. Shouts out were given to her husband Raymond, who gave her inspiration for the love scenes -ALRIGHT NOW!-Her boss Terri Worrell, who gave her time off every weekend at the DMV to shoot the series for 6 weeks; Mr. John, the “Sait,” who did so much h=behind the scenes; Loretta Walls who “did everything!” and “Chris Bolling,” her son, who she said , when she wanted to just quit the DMV, told her if she wasn't satisfied, do something different and inspired her to press forward with “The Heart.” Once the cheering died down, the screening began. And I was hooked.
The story line was intriguing. Off the top, your interest is grabbed and held hostage as the actors fully grasp their roles. The Heart series is a romantic political thriller focused around J.D. Harrison (Aaron Wiggins), his political rise to power, and all the love, drama, and corruption in between. I'll be going into further details of each character later. I was “Ooooo-ing” and “Aaahh-ing” right along with the crowd, and when it ended, I WAS LIKE “WAIT! WHAT HAPPENED? ARE YOU SERIOUS?!” I swear I felt like my air had been snatched away. I eventually realized that I was only at the screening of the first episode, and vowed to dig into that book as soon as I finished writing this article. I GOTTA KNOW WHAT HAPPENS NEXT! Here is a link to the trailer~~>http://www.irisbolling.net/the-heart-tv-series/ Listening in- because I'm nosy- I heard several people saying how the series stayed so true to the book, which is always a plus. There's nothing worse than a book-turned-TV series that strays too far from the original *cough Beautiful Creatures * and destroys the readers' pre-set image. After the screening, the super poised, super fine male actors offered to give tours of the museum to the crowd, which I thought was fabulous. By the twinkles in the other ladies' eyes, I don't think they minded either!
Brian Thompson & JD Harrison
Nakia Smithers, Mark Vincent, Iris Bolling
NEXT STOP...INTERVIEWS WITH THE CAST!!!
BLACK HISTORY MUSEUM – RICHMOND, VA Upon arriving at the historic museum, I automatically asked Iris how she felt right at this moment. She looked me straight in the eye and told me “My feet hurt, my little toe...” I burst out laughing. I love her honesty. Her energy and her personality is infectious. She went on to tell me that she feels “Validated...this feels like a family reunion coming back together...a lot of us haven't seen each other since filming.” She says a lot of the cast feels like a family. And I noticed that. It's been in the air this whole time. Some of them are doing the brothersister jabbing and Iris is going around keeping them all in line. In fact, she says “It kind of feels like I'm the momma and I'm spreading wisdom. This is like a proud mama moment.”
An Interview with DIRECTOR DAVEN FALKONE
UIM: What was the funnest thing about his project, and what was the most challenging thing? David: The funnest was the energy, the positivity on the set. There was no real negativity. Everyone gave their all There were no divas. Everyone was dedicated to the project. The challenge was the limited time on the project...getting everything needed...What helped was the actors. We didn't have as many takes, but they came in and shot about 15 pages a day. Usually only 5 pages get shot a day...We had a really great cast....You never really get to see behind the scenes, everyone gives 110%...I appreciate the cast, the volunteers, and the people who were dedicated to the cause...
STEPHEN CHEEKS (AL “TURK” DAY : THE BAD BOY -OR IS HE?) One thing to be noted off the top: the ladies LOVE this guy. The shrieks and screams for Turk were very telling, to say the least. Easy on the eyes, street smart and savvy, Turk plans on staying one step ahead of the ones planning against him, at all costs. Stephen Cheeks, however, is, of course, just as handsome, but he's extremely humble, soft-spoken, almost as if he's unaware of the disturbance his presence causes the females around him. There is NO Hollywood arrogance here. UI: Is there a prankster on the set? Stephen Cheeks: Aaron would be the prankster. UI: How does it feel being the “bad guy?” SC: I don't see Turk as the bad guy...because of the love he has for his sister (Tracey). He'd do anything for her. Cheeks said he relates to his character
on the strength of his own sister, who he's very close to. This is his 1st acting job, which he got after coming to the casting call, but it's not his first introduction into the spotlight. Cheeks is also a very talented musician. In fact, he did the opening credits to the series. He also has an EP album coming out on Feb 15 called K.I.N.G. (Keeping In Necessary Greatness)
Go to www.dewonsofficial.webs.com for more info and to hear his music! Great stuff!
MARK VINCENT (JAMES BROOKS)
Tall, poised, well-spoken, but with wickedly intelligent eyes, Mark Vincent comes off as someone who doesn't miss much. “We're able to work so well together...” he said. “It balances out...we can paint a perfect picture for the audience.” UIM: How do you balance this with your other life? MV: It's not hard balancing this with my other life...I had to take it serious...A ting is not just about you...What is the series trying to display? It's a team effort. It's about being effortless...being organic.” Mark has also been on House of Cards, Season 1 and had a role in Philomena. He has also done commercials and print work.
NIKKEA SMITHERS- PRODUCER All sunshine, all smiles, Nikkea Smithers is a ball of warm energy and positivity. Every time I saw her she was smiling; every time I saw her she was busy. She was absolutely everywhere, for everybody. She had this to say: “This was such a collaborative work...[As a producer I] make the wheels turn. If she [Iris] wants something, I have to do it, find a way to make it get done...We're still in post-production, catching things, catching whatever we can in out power. It's exciting. “When we leave, this story will be here...this story is classic...we push each other's projects; me, Iris and Loretta...whatever God wants me to do.” Nikkea is also an Essence magazine best-selling and award-winning author and spoken word artist.
KELLY PRADO (VICTORIA ) Sizzling Latina Kelly Prado was a gracious as she was breathtaking. She came to a casting call and was successful in attaining the part of Victoria. â€œVictoria is a news reporter interested in a case and knows the neighborhoods. She gets together with JD to help the community...she has family members in the gang.â€? Her character throws some spice into the mix, which every story line needs. I'm excited to see what her character is going to bring to the mix.
Troy Michel was just as full of light and personality as her character. Every time I turned around she was smiling, making someone else smile, or involving someone in some kind of conversation that had them smiling at the end of it. What a breath of fresh air she was. Troy stated that she was a karaoke addict and wanted to get the cast to do it. She is a mother of two, and currently in school for journalism and is a TV personality at CW Richmond, which explains her bubbly persona. She also has a lipstick line called DADE coming out in June. Can't wait! *Pic snatched from Troy Michel's Facebook page. It captured her personality perfectly!
RICHARD JACKSON (BRIAN THOMPSON) Mr. Laid back. The cool guy with a quiet strength. The perfect person to play an FBI agent. UI: What do you do during your down time on the set? RJ: There's no real down time...I read my script, stay focused...talk to the cast...watch the other scenes to see how they vibe. Jackson works in clinical research with his family business and loves working with people and he's happily married.
QUENTIN JASON TYSON-DIRECTOR OF CINEMATOGRAPHY Self proclaimed: photographer, editor, all-around production guy. He is truly passionate about his work and it shows. “My true passion is cinematography. It's an art that must be developed, especially in the film industry. “The director of cinematography is in charge of lighting, grips, gaffer...the entire LOOK of film...he brings the whole thing to life...there are no shortcuts...you have to master your craft. “When everyone 'Ooos' on time, you've caught the emotion properly; you've got it...you've brought the emotion out properly...you gotta keep the mood..maintain the pace...”
AARON WIGGINS (J.D. HARRISON) Mr. Charisma. The crowd loves him and he keeps them happy. I asked him if he was the really the prankster I'd been hearing about and he got the same look on his face my son did: pure charm with a sparkle of mischeif in his eyes. Mmmh hmm. But he was, like the rest of the cast and crew, a delight to talk to. When asked about his character, he responded “JD is more emotional than I am in real life. “I was one of the original members from the book trailer...the script was really a book excerpt...I read the book, then 3 years later, the key pieces were all still there [in the series script.] “The cast is so peaceful because they've been together as a core relationship, been established for awhile...these are real relationships.”
TREMAYNE NORRIS (DAVID HOLT)-THE BAD GUY The self-proclaimed “unlikeable” fellow on the show, in real life, Tremayne Norris is quite polite, well-mannered and full of quiet smiles; the epitome of a gentleman. UI: Is it fun being the bad guy? TM: Oh, yeah. It's fun to bring the element of tension and conflict to a show. Like a bad car accident, evil characters can't be looked away from. He has NO likeable features...It's fun to go outside the box...” Norris says he's a quiet, keeps-to-himself attorney that kind of fell into acting. He says he's silly, but has an outgoing side. “Acting is a breath of fresh air from being an attorney.. a fun escape, to be someone different.”
LASHEERA LEE Now, this wonderful woman was the first to greet us and was there assisting everyone from cast to guests. She stated she started off as the Book Club President to ~~>Blog Talk Radio Club~~>Virtual Assistant~~>P.R. Marketing! She was absolutely everywhere making sure everything was running smoothly and keeping the whole event on track.
LAMONT (AL “TURK” DAY'S BODYGAURD) Despite the freezing temps, Lamont was a true gentleman, and not only showed me and my photographer Judy around the historic Black History Museum, he walked us the LONG three blocks to our car for our safety, and even posed for us like the cold wasn't a factor. The hospitality of this cast was never-ending!
NEXT STOP: THE AFTER PARTY!!!
V.I.P. AFTERPARTY @THE HOLIDAY INN So, after the Round Robin Interviews, it's time to race back to the hotel, pass out for exactly 45 minutes, then get ready to go downstairs for the V.I.P. Party. As we pass the lobby, we can already see Iris supervising the set up. She's fast: how did she beat us here? The red carpet is already laid, the band is setting up. We hurry upstairs to get ready. When we come back downstairs, the party is in full swing: flashing cameras, beautiful gowns, handsome men in suits, and a supreme air of excitement and celebration fill the air. This is indeed a party.
IRIS BOLLING LOOKING STUNNING
TROY MICHEL GETTING HER CUPID SHUFFLE ON
BOOK CLUB MEMBERS/FELLOW AUTHORS
GET IT, NIKKEA !
THIS CAST MEMBER S WERE ALLL OVER THE PLACE. HE WAS DANCING HIS TAIL OFF! I TOOK SEVERAL SHOTS OF HIM BUT HE WAS MOVING SO FAST A LOT OF THEM WERE BLURRED! WOOOW!
TREMAYNE NORRIS AND COMPANY Overall, the party was a smashing success, as was the whole day. I'm delighted to have had the opportunity to have met such a professional, well-mannered group of people who have managed to be such great role models in their community and still be able to turn out such a wonderful project. Don't forget to tune into the CW Richmond on Feb. 15 for the first episode of The Heart Series! If you can't view it, go online to your local CW station and demand it! I did!
Test your “Biggie” Knowledge with the “BIG” Quiz 1) What two artist were featured on, "Deadly Combination"? 2) What was the first single from BIG's second album, "Life After Death"? 3) What was the name of the group that consisted of, BIG, Charli Baltimore, and Jay-Z? 4) What BIG song won "Hip-Hop Beat of the Year" in 1996? 5) What was the reggae artists name featured on "Respect" off of "Ready to Die"? 6) What was the Micheal Jackson song that featured Biggie? 7) What actress portrayed Faith Evans in the movie "Notorious"? 8) When BIG first began experimenting with music, what was the crews name he was affiliated with? 9) Who were the two women that were in a love triangle with BIG? 10) What movie soundtrack did Biggies debut song "Party and Bullshit" appear on?
The Commision Patra Antonique Smith "Who Shot Ya"
The Old Gold Brothers Lil Kim and Faith Evans
Big L and Tupac "Who's the Man" "This Time Around" "Hypnotize"
Answers : Big L and Tupac "Hypnotize" The Commision "Who Shot Ya"
Patra "This Time Around" Antonique Smith The Old Gold Brothers
Lil Kim and Faith Evans "Who's the Man"
Sexual Expression with Deszion
HIM: Her child's father has too much control over our household. I know those are his kids, but whenever he wants something, he uses the kids to make her jump and she goes for it. I'm supposed to just sit back and deal with it? Naw, not happening. HER: That's my kids' father. We have to communicate because we got kids. My ex is annoying, yeah, but I think he's just jealous. He don't have kids, so he doesn't understand. I HAVE to deal with this guy...
You know, most of the inboxes-around 90%- I get have to do with the same thing: lack of communication, with an emphasis on stubbornness. I mean seriously...
catty and jealous, too, honey. If he has NO legitimate reason to be pestering you all the time, stop letting him. He's disrupting your house because he CAN.
Your position, as the mother, is not Okay, look here. I'm gonna start to pick a fight with him. It's your posiwith her. tion to establish some visitation and contact rules. There's no need for him Sweetheart, let's read over what you said: You know your ex is annoying. to pop up at your house unannounced. I'm going to translate that to mean he's There's no need for him to be calling all picking with you because you're letting times of night. He's NOT checking on him and he knows it's causing a rift be- the kids: they are most likely sleep. Don't let that continue. Your man is NOT tween your new dude. Men can be
going to appreciate that and is going to be ready to put him in his place because you aren't doing it. Those lines need not cross. Establish a schedule if you don't have visitation and stick to it. You have to learn to co-parent. That does not mean he runs anything in your house. There's already a man there. Ok...HIM. I understand your frustration. However, your position is to express how you feel and not be disrespected in your own home. Be mindful of the children in your anger, however. I know it takes a lot of patience in dealing with this kind of situation, but it IS one that you were aware of when getting involved with her, correct? Now, most of the responsibility is going to fall on her to handle that situation, but if her ex comes to your house acting up and disrespecting her, your position is now to end it, pull your woman inside and close the door. She is going to have to learn that no matter who it is, she doesn't have to be disrespected. Using the children to control someone is despicable and not to be tolerated. If there is a visitation order, help her to stick to it. If the situation is that unpleasant, she doesn't have to let
him anywhere near them other than those times. If he's constantly confrontational, she can go get the visits supervised. Don't allow yourselves to be hostage to a bully, but don't allow yourself to go to jail behind one, either.
UIM Friends and Fam Chime IN
Urban Image Mar 04, 6:35pm We all Done things when we were Young, but as we get Older we suppose to "LIVE AND LEARN"...With that being said ...HOW OLD is TOO OLD to be FIGHTING OVER A DUDE or WOMAN ??? ARE we still doing that...????
Urban Image Mar 04, 7:12pm Get your Function then...
Emiaj AhDai Mar 04, 8:46pm I ain't gone do it... You can have him... I don't have to do the dumb shit
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Urban Image Mar 04, 6:41pm Once you learn better you do better, hopefully the lesson is learned at an early age (before 25) but for some, sadly it's not..
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Author Kharisma Kashmere Mar 04, 6:50pm in chicago we call it the popeyes, I gave her a 3 piece spicy
Urban Image Author Kharisma Kashmere Mar 04, 6:47pm
Mar 04, 6:52pm LOLOLOLOLOL Yup Y'all something Vicious there..
She whoop me a lil bit in the beginning LOL
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Urban Image Mar 04, 6:36pm I heard today two Police Officers were in court...AND GOT TO FIGHTING OVER A WOMAN...REALLY WE STILL DOING THAT ISH....LOL
Au Ma thor r 0 Kha 4, 6 ris Th :44 ma ec pm Ka raz do shm ...L ies er e t th OL bu t n ing is ot for I tha t
Urban Image Mar 04, 6:42pm Author Kharisma Kashmere You got boxing Gloves in the Closet
Author Kharisma Kashmere Mar 04, 6:42pm If its not your husband...yeah 25 should be the cut off
Author Kharisma Kashmere Mar 04, 6:38pm What real women who find themselves fighting and there is a man involved normally its because she feels disrespected. But if you love him its timeless just like the love you have for him.
L.O.C. THAT HAIR DOWN! USING THE L.O.C. METHOD TO KEEP YOUR NATURAL HAIR MOISTURIZED By: Deszion Nasir
Naptural85 Natural hair Guru type 4b/c Hair
from being evaporated from it and lost to the atmosphere thus helping the hair to stay moisturized for longer. By using Hey, there, all my Naturalistas! oil then a thicker heavier butter on top So, you've made the decision to go natu- you are ensuring that as much moisture ral, huh? Whether you've done the B.C. as possible remains on the hair shaft (big chop) or are transitioning and cut- which is beneficial for curlies who strugting away the relaxed hair slowly, one of gle to maintain moisturized hair. the biggest issues you'll come across is dryness. The method is so easy to incorpoMost people think natural hair is rate into your routine because it involves dry, brittle and hard to manage, but in using products you probably already actuality, most curly hair sucks up mois- own and simply changing the order in ture like you wouldn't believe and needs which you apply them to your hair. If to be replenished to get that (TV) effect. you would like to start using the LOC Most of that is weave, BTW. method then simply follow these easy Anywayz, an extremely effective steps below: method at keeping all types of hair moisturized is the simple method of L(liquid) Directions O(oil) (cream). Step 1 - Apply a moisturizing waterbased leave-in conditioner to cleansed The LOC method has been abuzz hair : personally, I use a spray bottle of on the natural hair forums for its ability 1/3 to Â˝ aloe vera juice and the rest H2O to let curlies go days without having to along with some lavender and pepperre-moisturize their curls. LOC is an ab- mint oil. This is excellent to mist (NOT breviation for leave in conditioner, oil DAMPEN) your curls with at least once and cream. The name itself signifies the a day as aloe vera has phenomenal moisproducts a curly should apply as well as turizing properties and leaves your hair the order in which to apply them, mak- remarkably soft. ing it an easy-to-remember curly routine. Step 2 - Apply a thin layer of oil to your hair to help lock in the moisture: I use a What sets the LOC method apart special blend of EVOO (Extra virgin olfrom other methods is the layering of ive oil, avocado oil, grape seed oil, products in a specific order to maximize sweet almond oil, Jamaican Black castor moisture retention. The layer of moisture is effectively sealed in by two products which are both known to be excellent sealants: oil and butter. Both oil and butter are praised for their ability to create a layer along the hair shaft that helps to prevent water
oil and black walnut oil, and jojoba oil if I have it. It's also great for your skin and can be used for your scalp instead of “greasing.” PLEASE stop putting grease on your scalp! Petroleum is horrible for your pores! Don't slather your hair in oil, just enough to work through, paying attention to ends. Step 3 - Apply a butter-based, creamy moisturizer to your hair to seal that moisture in: I like whipped Shea butter, but on my daughter I may use a bit of Kimmaytube's leave-in. Get the exact recipe here~~> http:// www.blackhairinformation.com/haircare-2/hair-treatments-and-recipes/ moisturizing-treatments/kimmaytubesleave-in-conditioner-recipe/Once done feel free to use your regular styling products to style your hair as normal. I do this at night before I braid and pin her hair under her bonnet and after misting in the morning her hair is shiny and bouncy all day. I even to this routine minus the braiding and bonnet- on my sons when I can wrangle one of them down and their hair has the same results, as one is growing his fro out and the youngest hates getting his hair cut. This is the only way he'll let anyone near his hair. Three Reasons the LOC method Works to Moisturize Hair 1. Water = Moisture When it comes to moisturizing, water is moisture. It's a no brainer that adding water as the liquid to your hair is going to moisturize and hydrate. The is-
sue is retaining that moisture from water. And that’s where the other 2 components of the L.O.C. method comes into play. 2. Oil Helps the Hair Hold on to Water Molecules This is where the method loses some people. And for good reason. It’s true that oil and water don’t mix. And if you aren’t using oils that penetrate the hair its best to use your cream before your oil or LCO Method. But certain natural oils have the ability to penetrate the hair shaft and bind with the hair internal structure or protein. These oils are coconut, olive, and avocado oil. They increase the hair’s ability to hold on to water molecules. This keeps the hair strong and prevents breakage. 3. Cream Locks In Moisture There’s a little controversy as to what’s an appropriate cream. Some women consider their conditioners, es.
creams, or their styling products. And this is OK. Many of these products do have ingredients that will act as moisture sealants. But its important that your cream is moisturizing. Your cream in this instance should seal the hair cuticle or act as a sealant. I personally use my leave in conditioner as my cream (the Kimmaytube mix) sometimes. But letâ€™s not get caught up on the word cream. Because the best creams when it comes to this method may or may not be creams at all. The purpose of the cream component is to seal or lock in moisture introduced from L & O. Natural products that seal and coat the hair are ideal. They are more likely to retain moisture but still allow the hair to take in additional moisture in the case of rehydration between shampoos or cowashes. (I'll talk about co-washing next month.)The best coating oils are Castor, Grape seed, and Jojoba. They act as sealants. They can also act as emollients that lubricate and fill in gaps along the hair cuticle to prevent moisture loss.
If you have extremely dry hair and/ or live in harsh winter climates consider using natural butters like Shea or Mango as your cream for this step. So go ahead and give your hair the L.O.C. Treatment and let me know how it goes! I bet your hair will thank you! And being that 95% of the ingredients can be found in your kitchen, your pockets will thank you, too!
ARIES Attempting to satisfy romantic needs and assertive/sexual needs at the same time could be taxing. Passions run high and you can feel the heat. You could stir up problems in order to fulfill a need for excitement. Be wary of making impulse persuades. Jealousy, greed and lust could all come into action at the same time. Keep your cool!
friendship. This is a rather happy, goaloriented month. A lively agenda is promised, youâ€™re attracting quite a bit of interest, and your energy for making contact with others is high. This is a time to follow your dreams and ideals, and to plant a seed in the form of a wish for the future. You could face difficulties in fulfilling your wishes and satisfying your desires. You may feel frustrated and unappreciatTAURUS ed. Your feelings are going against much Widening the vistas of your very exist- of what you value, so that too makes way ence is what this month makes you do. for a possible difficulty. It could also You still extend warmth and friendship, happen that now . as well as cooperation at work. All the trends â€“ which started last month will now gain momentum, focus and direction. You reach out to people in a rare show of warmth, connubial bliss and
you’re so busy working for others that sponsibilities and communicating with others. You may also tend to have a you have no time for yourself and in the process you miss out a lot of good things more pushy, self-centered or provocative communication style. As such, discusof life. sions may become intense, or they may turn into arguments. If latter is the case, GEMINI A taste for the out of the ordinary is fa- it’s likely because you are taking things vored this month. Regular affairs simply very personally right now, or because you are deliberately imposing your bedon’t seem to satisfy. You will accept pleasure from anything and everything liefs and ideas. There might be an issue that might raise confrontations or rethat expands your horizons, both physically and emotionally. Distant connec- quires compromise with someone. Extra tions and places may for the most part caution is advised in driving or anything related to transportation. appeal now. You have a tendency to be outgoing and liberal when it comes to VIRGO love. Public relations work, promotion, You may tend to show-off what you and other such activities are favored. It have and own, and you could be trying is more about how you communicate yourself than the essentials of what you to demonstrate your worth to others usare saying that helps influencing others ing money and possessions as the means to do so. You will exert extra energy to to you. secure whatever you feel you have earned or deserve. Conflicts might occur CANCER over issues of rights and ownership. You may feel that you’re in the grip of a force beyond your control, since it is a Some of you might face setbacks in their time for great, perhaps even radical or earning potential, affecting both income drastic, changes in your material as well and the resources you’ve been able to reas emotional world. This month, a finan- ly on, in the past. This is a time when impulse buying is at a peak. cial boost is likely, or you may expand money-wise all the way through your partner/associate. You are more tending to even differences in a partnership/ relationship regarding the sharing of authority, intimacy matters, finances, and other emotionally-charged topics. Close relationships are intensified. Either you or your partner shall demand a deeper unification. LEO You may be especially busy serving re-
LIBRA Love (and lust) is in the air. It’s now innate for you to turn on the magic without even lifting a finger. More affectionate and appreciative interactions with your children may also figure now. Your powers of magnetism/attraction shall see new heights this month. At this time, you intuitively know how to position yourself in the best light in order to make a good impression on others. Any love affair begun now will be characterized by good liveliness, having excitement, and a fair share of arousing drama! Your physical appearance may be the target of your efforts and you may set out to improve or change your style/ approach. In fact, you may be somewhat aggressive and have a short temper. Avoid being over-ambitious. Take charge of your life, but don’t bully others in the progression! This is an excellent phase for assertiveness and physical liveliness. Love affairs may also be stepped up. On the odd circumstance when an accident occurs, it is more likely to involve the head or face
moves, rashness, over-confidence that nothing can go wrong or just foolhardy behavior. Some danger or possible mishap may be lurking. Risk-taking, speculation must be avoided. Also rashness in an affair of the heart which might leave you hurt and scattered, if not shattered. SAGITARRIUS All your mental activity will be intensely personal, subjective and even egocentric. You are mostly cheerful in your approach to others, and perhaps somewhat intellectual this month. As a result, fresh acquaintances and friendships come to you, giving pleasure, inspiration and ideas. This month, you are most attracted to wit, cheerfulness, and verbal rapport. You are especially good at mediating conflicts. Try smoothing over differences using your diplomacy skills
CAPRICORN You are intent on pushing forward in your career and professional status. Conflicts with those in authority are possible now. You may pour more energy into self-promotion or business/career activities. The desires and ambitions along these lines are unusually pressing. You SCORPIO This is a very playful period of the year, will take a great amount of initiative to when you are inspired creatively and further your personal career goals and to make important strides in your overall emotionally. After a period of selfprotectiveness, you are now more spon- life direction. You could find that your taneous and more willing to take risks. A talents or services are especially in rich, fruitful and happy phase comes to you and you’re enjoying it. The spice of life is there for you in the variety of interests, activities, and feelings that you are bound to experience this month. Don’t fly too high or too far — risky
demand now. Donâ€™t, however, let your whispers characterize this month, altenterprising nature get interpreted as ag- hough for some, it can also be a time of gressiveness or insensitivity. endings, relationship concerns, and AQUARIUS vagueness. You are likely to throw cauYou could find it hard to deny yourself tion to the wind, and where boundaries anything this month. There is a certain between fantasy and reality can be determination building up within you to alter not just your life or circumstances, blurred, so tread carefully. Avoid secret but practically cast yourself in a new im- dealings and behind the door activities, age. This images needs to connect to the especially the ones that are not clearly way you want to see yourself, in terms of appearance, health, physique, atti- legitimate and justifiable. It can be better tudes and mindset â€“ all adding up to the to be motionless and still, so you can quality of life plus lifestyle. Others find feel the wind changing, than to row in you agreeable and cooperative. People the wrong direction could literally approach you and appreciate you for who you are. You now know what works best for you and you have great wisdom inside you. You may have a taste for exotic at this time and you tend to try out new things, take a few risks to embrace out-of-theordinary with regards to romantic involvements as well as financial undertakings. It could be a need of the hour or merely your own craving to explore and experience. This is a good time for financial undertakings involving electronics, technology, the internet, metaphysics, and the arts, as well as group activities. PISCES Your affection is expressed behind closed doors. Attraction to secrets and
UIM’s What’s the Word Mix Up By: Larrod Evans
(Unscramble the Biggie Songs Below)
1) O W H
2) I G B
3) Y P T O Z I H E N _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ 5
4) M E O C
_ _ _ _
5) Y S S K E H T
I M I L T
_ _ _ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _
6) E M I M G T E H _ _ _ _ _
_ _ _
O O L T _ _ _ _
7) D Y A V E R E Y T U G L S G E R _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ 11
Last months answer: Canadian Mist
This was Bigâ€™s most famous revelation upon getting rich.
Answer: __ __ 1
__ __ 8
__ __ __ __ __ 3
__ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ 10 11 12
13 14 15 16 17
propose. I think the way he I wrote you before “Ready to did it was not thought through get married”. I hope that you and it wasn’t from the heart. I remember me. Well am writ- think he only did it to appease me. That is when I broke up ing you to tell that my situation has changed dramatically. with him. He is heart was truly not in it, then only to find out He and I have broken up. It has been a little over a month that he was giving me a ring now. I am in transition period that was purchased for fifty dollars from the Walmart right now, I am moving out and he is possibly moving to down the street. I was doing the bills and balancing the his own space. Here I have checkbook and I saw the been with this man for five transaction. I was years and we call it quits. I love him but I can’t see myself really marrying him. He did
mortified. Again I can’t see myself marrying him. I feel so stupid and that I have wasted my time. How do I get pass this?
always want the wedding and not
“A Little Late”
rious any more. I for one take
Dear “A Little Late”,
them very serious and believe that
I do remember your letter. I am going to be honest when I saw the message I thought I would be reading about some good news, maybe even a wedding invitation.
want to put in the work for the marriage. Entering into a marriage should not be entered into lightly. People do not take those vows se-
marriage is forever. (Wait you didn’t write me about that). Let’s talk about this ring. I let out a small sigh behind this. Reason being my girlfriends and I were hav-
I see that this was very different. I ing a conversation about the prices of engagement rings. The price am sorry that things didn’t turn out the way you thought it would. of an engagement ring should be three months of his annual salary. We all live and we learn. Here is where the honesty kicks in. I believe I told you before that you should never force a man into a corner and make him do what you want him to do in your time. Yes before you said you were ready to be married, but look at you now. That leads me to think that you just wanted to be married and have a wedding and not be married forever. (I could be wrong) I have seen it before where people
That is society putting a price on what love is worth. Some people have different ways of showing love. I have friends who actually
had their rings tattooed on. They have rings but it is the thought of it being permanent that is special. That $50.00 ring may have been what he could afford at the very moment. His plan could have been that he had something bigger in store for you. “It’s the thought that counts.” People always say
you really want out of life and
in mind I didnâ€™t give a time limit.
prepare for them. Get to know
Sometimes getting back to our-
yourself again. I say that because selves takes time. you have spent the last five years I hope that you find what you losing pieces of you. Now keep need in life.
Note From Ask Emiaj
First and foremost I want to thank everyone who reads my column and blogs. The support is greatly appreciated and received. I do what I do for you. I look forward to reading your emails. Your situations make me reach a little deeper sometimes. This thing is not done just for the heck of it but because I want to see everyone happy. If you know me my personality is realistic but I am happy with me. I just want you all to always be happy with yourself and decisions that you make because it is what shapes and molds you into the person that you are. I thank you for helping and molding me into a better person. Always keep in mind I am just as human as you.
Welcome to the 1st edition of “UIM’s Musical Mark”. This column will feature some of the top rated musicians on the independent charts. Our staff is working hard to bring you the hottest artist and music available online. Check us out each month to stay in the know of who is smoking the independent charts out there. We hope y’all enjoy!
Top 10 Indie Chart R&B Pics
Gary Michael Turner
*Indie pics obtained from: http://indiecharts.com
Music Review for R & B Artist, Bianka By: Patrice Rivers
What’s more exciting than hearing the smooth sound of r n b mixed with hot vocals? Unlike Tank, Musiq Soulchild, Beyonce, Ciara or even Fantasia Barrino, India Chart Artists are fresh out their comfort zone and has vocals that will have some of their songs on repeat. Bianka who is a hot indie r n b artist with a dash of pop and soul came out with four tracks, “Eyes on You,” “Rude Girl,” “Bye,” and “Loves Pain” Each song has a soft and up-beat sound that matches her vocals. Any type of r n b that isn’t like the ordinary r n b you hear on the radio is considered to be different and unique. Bianka was named 2009 most sexy girl on MAXIM magazine 2008 Graced the Cover of XXL Magazine 3 MTV Russia Music AWARDS 2007 nominations: Best RNB Artist - Winner! Best Singer Best Newcomer
BIANKAS first solo-album hit No 1 in the Ukraine Russia Belarus and other former Soviet States. Bianka topped 500000 official sales in Russia and another 121000 in the Ukraine. By listening to each one of her songs, you will get a taste of her mellow and colorful vibrant lyrics that will have you bobbing your head. Each song paints a vivid picture to make the listeners get a feel of her flavor of music. With a hint of pop and soul mixed with r n b, you have yourself a selection of flawless and chic talent. Her song “Rude Girl” has the type of beat that will have you on the dance floor dancing while one of her slow songs “Bye” talks about a deep situation with her soft musical voice. Bianka has her own indie label, “3 Shots Productions” and she also translates her music from English to Russia. Her music can be found on itunes, amazon and also on reverbnation at www.reverbnation.com/.beanka.
An Exclusive Interview with Tyler Noel: Artist in the Top 10 of the Indie R&B Charts By: Patrice RIvers
Atlanta, GA. I have been singing since the age of five. I grew up in the Church and began singing in the choir like most urban singers. I come from of family of talented singers and musicians and music has always been a big thing growing up for me. My dream has always been to be a successful recording artist and performer. I moved to Atlanta, GA from Fort Lauderdale, FL a few years ago in order to chase my dreams. The journey has had its highs and lows but Iâ€™m enjoying it so much and I still cannot imagine doing anything else. P: How old were you when your music career took off? Did you perform at shows? T: I was a teen when I started my career professionally by signing with a girl group and yes I performed then and Patrice: Tell me a little bit about yourself. Who is Tyler Noel and what through out the years at talent shows, do you do when you arenâ€™t working showcases, and anywhere else that has a microphone and a stage. LoL. I still on your music? perform as much as I possibly can while Tyler: Sure, I am Tyler Noel, an R&B I still write and record as an artist daily. singer and songwriter currently living in P: Who were your motivators when
T: My biggest motivator would have to be my Father who passed away a few years ago. He was a wonderful man and only wanted to see me happy and supported me every step of the way. As far as artist that motivated me, wow, there are so many but early on it was Gospel singers that inspired me to chase my dreams. Those powerful Gospel voices would capture my attention at a young age and I was amazed by what I heard so many of them do with their voices. The ranges and tones were like magic to my ears. P: By reading your bio on www.indiecharts.com, I learned that you suffered from a severe partially paralyzing stroke. How did that make you feel knowing that singing has always been your passion? What were some of your struggles when going through this stroke? What was going through your mind? Reactions? T: The stroke that I suffered at the age of 18 hit like a freight train out of the blue. There were no signs, no warnings, and I thought I was young and invincible back then. I was hospitalized thinking that I may never sing again and that I may not recover from this and I was completely in a state of depression and despair. With the support of family and friends, I fought back to learn how to do
many things that we take for granted daily like â€œtalkingâ€? for example. The process to recover fully was hard but it really showed me that I could overcome anything with work and determination. My cheering squad wasnâ€™t going to let me and fail and I could just feel that God had bigger plans for me then just sitting in that hospital bed. P: Five years from now, how do you see yourself? T: Five years from now I want to be earning a good living singing as a professional. My goal is to be a one of the most well respected singers in the industry and continue to put out god mu-
P: Tell me more about the group Solo Tree. How did that start furthering your music career? Did you enjoy being a lead singer? T: Solo Tre was a girl group that I was recruited to be the lead singer for many years ago. It opened my eyes up to what the music industry was really all about. I really had to grow up fast in the industry because the business really did have a lot of things that could have you unfocused and caught up. I enjoyed the group thing for a while but learned that girls and their personalities really have to melt together in order for the group to really work and that always wasn’t the case.
P: Looking at your artist review on your profile page and I see that you have great ranking scores between 4.7 to a 4.8, how does that make you feel?
T: I am glad that my music is enjoyed and that the scores reflect how much P: What are some of the advantages that is. I have received numerous and disadvantages of being an R n B great comments on that site and I am singer? excited sharing my music there. T: The advantage is that it really is beThere are so many talented people coming a smaller pool of people that on IndieCharts.com and I appreciate can really sing and if you have a great the platform to expand my fan base. voice (no auto tune), you can stand out from the pack easily. The disadvantage P: I love all of your songs on your is being a female in the industry. This is profile. Tell me about the song “If a male oriented industry and many are you wanna leave.” not professional at what they do and T: Well, this song was about a particular music/and or business is not their num- situation that I went through with a parber one priority when dealing with feticular person in my life in the past. I males in the industry. Females in the in- was there for him he had nothing and I dustry have to weed out the “thirsty” supported his growth as a person and a professionals in order to find true pro- man. Over time people grow apart and fessionals. they sometimes think that the grass is
then you have to let even those you care about go. Love shouldnâ€™t hurt by any means, not true love.
those scenarios and memories. I want my songs to be real because I feel its better to connect with fans on an emotional level and sing things that they can relate to and believe.
P: Where do you get all of your inspiration for your songs? Are any of them about real life situations? If so, P: Being a singer requires dedication, commitment and hard work and which one (s)? sometimes difficult times, how do T: All my songs are about real scenarios. I choose to only write, record and sing you conquer those difficult times? songs that mean something to me or al- What is your cure for that? low me express how I feel. My songs are T: The cure for the difficult times is God, like therapy and I sing them sometimes family, your team, the fans and the bein order to get thru, past and remember lief in yourself. God I know has given
me this gift T: Brandy, for a reason Christina A., and I’m going Monica, to use it the Tamar B., Tobest way I ni B., Whitknow how. ney H., My family Chante and fans conMoore, Fantinue to suptasia, port me and Jazmine S., give me Ledisi and those words the list goes that keep me on and on. I uplifted and enjoy real strong. My singers and manager, Mr. women that Ken Morris have studies with Karma their craft. Kreative Management is a special indi- My favorite singer is Karen Clark Sheard, vidual. He never allows me to wallow in ohhh this lady can blow. Lol. my feelings and he inspires me through P: Tell everyone where they can purhis works and words. chase and listen to your songs at? P: When you aren’t singing, what do T: My songs are on iTunes, Amazon, you enjoy doing? Spotify and just about anywhere else. T: I enjoy hanging with family and friends when I am not singing. I enjoy good food, good drinks and good company. I live life to the fullest on a daily basis and I constantly want to do any and all things that make me happy. After suffering that stroke, I learned that life is short, don’t waste it. P: Who are some of your favorite R and B singers?
You can hear me at www.mystlernoel.com or www.youtube.com/tylernoelmusic. https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/ifyou-wanna-leave-single/id776188686 and please enjoy. P: Thank you for your time and for agreeing to do this interview Tyler Noel! T: You are more than welcome and I
Remembering Royalty By Larrod Evans
In March 1997, Hip-Hop lost one of its all-time greats. Seventeen years later, U.I.M remembers an unbelievable M.C and reminds you why he will always be the "King of New York" Back in the day( I'm not that old, you can do the math.) school would get out at 2:45, so that left me with 15 minutes to catch the beginning of Rap City. Every Hip-Hop junky knew that they always showed the newest and hottest joints from the jump. So, my crew and I had to jet on the bus and cross our fingers in hopes that we made it in time. The year was 1994 in upstate New York. Hip-Hop was raw and uncut at the time. I'm talking about cats like Wu-Tang, Mobb Deep, Jeru the Damanja, Lords of the Underground, Boot Camp Clik and a bunch of
other gritty artist that sounded like they were some type of creature living in the sewers and only came up to the surface to spit grimy shit. I'll never forget it, this particular day I was at home making a last chance effort to grab some snacks when I heard; When I was just tryin to make some money to feed my daughter... ya know what I'm sayin...It's all good baby
bay-bee, uh" Then the beat dropped and let's just say my that hunger shifted. The thick commanding baritone and straight forward rhymes over this familiar sounding beat had me glued to my seat. Before I could completely register this defining moment the phone rang; "Yo L, you peepin this cat? He killin it yo. B, he the nicest right now, no doubt." And I replied, "Word." Being only fifteen at the time, I was already a certified Hip-Hop enthusiast with an unbiased ear for good music. I had lived in every region of the U.S. with the exception of the Midwest which would come at a later date. This made me feel that my opinion was valid and worth listening. Who else do you know that witnessed the rise of the West Coast, the counter attack of the East Coast, and the strong impact of the Midwest in 1996-97 during their teenage years? So when I heard Big, I knew he was the truth. He gave me that same jaw dropping, chills down your spine, scrape together all your nickels and dimes to cop the album feeling I felt upon hearing other greats such as Nas, Twista, Scarface and Ice Cube. His flow was , so effortless
, refreshing and confident. No disrespect to the previous "Bug Men" that graced the mic, but Big was killin 'em by a long shot. From his charisma to his vivid street tales, Big separated himself from other M.C.'s. He was just a complete artist. One that could be on some fly player shit one minute, then kick some stick-up kid shit the next. He was human and I could relate to his struggles and triumph. Songs like, "Suicidal Thoughts" showed his vulnerability. The classic, "One More Chance" gave listeners a glimpse of how he used humor and wealth to cope with his imperfections. "Black and ugly as ever/however. I stay Coogi down to the socks/rings and watch filled with rocks." Speaking of gear and jewelry, Big definitely re- defined staying fly and fresh. As a matter of fact, he made me cop every color Kangol available at the Chinese store. I'm not sure if they were authentic or not, but for $29.99, I rocked 'em on the regular! To this day, I still credit my hand skills to having to ward off thirsty stick-up kids and classmates that assumed I was an easy target. It seemed like every week I was
defending my Kangols, Polo's and Timbo's. Big eventually released the instant classic "Ready to Die" on November 30, 1994. It was normal for artist to drop albums that you could put on and bang all the way through. Albums like Too Short's "Get in Where You Fit In", Gangstarr's "Hard to Earn" and "The Diary" from Scarface. Sure enough, Big's lp fit right into the formula. It's one thing to possess mic skills, but to have that pure star quality is a rare find. Big was a natural entertainer with a larger than life personality that complimented his street mentality. He gave us an up close story of a drug dealer turned M.C. and further proved that any young black man from the hood could have dreams. At the time, there was an internal beef taking place within New York. Big frequently proclaimed to be the King of NY referring to Christopher Walkens portrayal of a drug kingpin (Frank White) in the cult classic, "King of New York." This had every prominent M.C. in NY heated. Raekwon from Wu-Tang and Nas were just a few. And personally, I thought that all three were worthy of the title. However, Big's marketability gave
him a major edge in the quest for dominance. With his hardcore lyrics over Puff's radio friendly tracks, he ruled the airwaves and became the face of East Coast Hip-Hop. There wasn't a party, barbershop, or Jeep not pumpin his music. Whatever mood you were in, Big had a song for it. If you wanted to get a party started, throw on "Big Poppa", or if you were havin women problems, throw on "Get Money." To this day, Big's everlasting presence is still felt throughout the industry. Rick Ross' remake of "You're Nobody" is the latest example of how Big's influence lives on. It seems like yesterday I was draped in Karl Kani with a fresh Kangol on, ridin' the bus bustin rhymes. Now, twenty years after his death I still love Big Poppa and respect the throne he held down.
Now Available with Censored Cover for Your Discretion!