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everyday

A2 - 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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NEW

NEW

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F – 46

Bet Your Ass

F – 48

Sparkling Fucking Personality

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NEW

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NEW

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F – 47

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F – 49

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Dirty Old Man

This will Go Perfectly

929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com


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everyday

A2 - 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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NEW F – 50

Crazytown

NEW

F - 54

The Same Outfit

NEW F - 58

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NEW

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NEW

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It’s Not An Act - F

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F – 51

NEW

F – 52

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NEW

F - 56

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NEW

F - 60

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Don’t Try This At Home

F – 55

I like You

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NEW

F - !59

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More Wine In A Bottle

Born To Be Wild

It’s Not An Act - M

Guess How Many of These I don’t Give?

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F - 53

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NEW F - 57

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NEW

Bad Idea

Hey There Foxy!

NEW

F - !61

Plot A Murder

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everyday

A2 - 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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NEW F – 62

You Rock!

F - 02

Dinner is Poured!

F - 11

Arrive Ugly

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NEW

F – 63

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You know What Rhymes With Friday? Vodka!

F – 04

NEW

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F - 07

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Admit Faults

Dance Moves

Drunk & Disorderly

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F – 64

NEW

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F - 65

Unstoppable!

F - 08

Love The Wine You’re with

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F - ! 12

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F - 19

The Road Less Traveled

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There Are No Words For Your Kind of Cool

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F - 20

Because Blending in is For Pussies

929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com

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everyday

A2 - 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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F – 22

Casual Fridays

F - 26

My Favorite Mixed Drink

F - 30

New Prescription

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F – 23

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Speaking in Cursive - f

F – 27

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F - ! 31

WTF List

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F - 28

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F - 32

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Speaking in Cursive - M

Soup of the Day: Bourbon with Ice Croutons

Sleep With My Husband

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F – 24

You Are Fucking Awesome!

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F - 25

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F - 29

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Give a Shit

You are SO my kind of Person

F - 33 !

Bitch? Moi?

929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com

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everyday

A2 - 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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F – 34

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Near The Liquor Store

F - 38

Mood Swings

F – 35

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You’ve Mistaken Me For Someone Who Gives A Shit

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F – 39

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F – 36

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F - 40

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F - 44

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Only One Hand to Hold It

Women Getting Shit Done Since Forever

Some People Make Everything Look So Effortless

F - 37

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F - 41

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Before Wine I judge Everyone

I can’t remember Which One of us is the Bad Influence

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F - 42

Swear Jar

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F - ! 43

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Congrats – You Nailed It!

Bravo Darling!

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F - 45 !

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If Every day Is A gift… Then Today Was Socks

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B ir t h d a y

A2 - 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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NEW BD – 79

Looking good Feeling good

NEW BD - 83

Extra years - f

NEW BD - 87

You’re How Old?

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NEW BD - 80

Bad at math

NEW BD - 84

Extra years - m

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BD !- 02

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There is no number after 29

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NEW BD - 82

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NEW BD - 85

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NEW BD - 86

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Surprise party

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NEW BD - 81

Big Splash

BD - 03 Arsenic

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Happiness is like Peeing your pants

Whooping it up!

BD - !08

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He’d always had a way with the chicks

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B ir t h d a y

A2 - 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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BD – 09

Dog Years - F

BD - 19

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BD - 10

Dog Years - M

BD - 20

Almost Like-Like - M

BD - 28

Hot Stuff!

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BD - 11

Gin & Tonic Diet

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BD - 25

Almost Life-like - F

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BD !- 29 Tequila

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Oh Shit!

BD - 31

boring old you

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BD - 14

Shame - M

BD - 26

Rat’s Ass!

BD - !43

Big Ass Birthday

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B ir t h d a y

A2 - 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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BD – 44

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BD - 45

Here’s your fucking birthday card

Birthday Guitars

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BD - 49

Bitches Be Drinkin’

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BD - 50

Juice Cleanse

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Bothered - F

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I almost pooped in my lederhosen!

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BD - 54

BD - 46

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BD !- 55

Bothered - M

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BD - 51

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Happy Birthday You Magnificent Bastard!

BD - 56

Bottoms Up!

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BD - 47

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Because no great story ever started with a salad

BD - 52

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Archeologists just discovered your high school photo

BD - !57

Get Out - F

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B ir t h d a y

A2 - 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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BD – 58

Get Out - M

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BD - 59

Getting Lucky - F

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BD - 62

BD - 63

And then there’s you

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BD - 60

Getting Lucky - M

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Shame - F

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BD - 64

Has Anyone Seen My Youth?

BD - 61

BD - 65

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Well… Isn’t That Special!

Perk Up, It’s your Birthday!

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BD - 66

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As Long as I Get Cake

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BD !- 67

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BD - 68

Enough About You

Swear Words

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BD - !69

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Not As Old As You Will Be Next Year

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B ir t h d a y

A2 - 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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BD – 70

You’re Not Old, You’re Retro

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BD - 71

Now What Are Your Other 2 Wishes?

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BD - 74

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BD - 75

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Shipping & Handling - F Shipping & Handling - M

BD - 78

Happy Birthday Darlin’

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BD - 72

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You’re Still alive?

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BD - 76

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You Don’t Look A Day Over Fabulous - F

BD - 73

Name Your Poison, Sir

BD - 77

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You Don’t Look A Day Over Fabulous - M

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Happy Birthday To You!

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Love

A2 – 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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LV – 02

Wedding Cats

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LV – 03

Love Birds

LV – 04

Married Gents

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LV – 06

Happily Ever After

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LV - 07

Being Married Is Fantastic…

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LV -! 08

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Marriage is God’s Way of Stopping Us From Fighting With Strangers

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LV - 09

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Retro Congratulations

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! LV - 10

Flamingos

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LV – 11

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No One Can Stop Our Love - F

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Love

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A2 – 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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LV – 12

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LV – 14

No One Can Stop Our Love - M

I Hear Wedding Bells

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LV – 16

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LV - 19

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Here’s To A Great Team!

LV – 15

You Give Me Wood

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LV - 17

You Had Me At “Beaver”

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LV -! 18

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After A Few Times They Fell In Love

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Marriage is just Two people Constantly Asking Each Other What They Want To Eat, Until One Of Them Dies

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LV - !20

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Congratulations On Being Married To Me!

LV – 21

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90% of being Married is Just Shouting “What?” From Another Room

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Love

A2 – 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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LV – 22

Floral Wedding

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LV – 23

Perfect Match!

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LV – 25

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Take Off Your Pants!

LV – 24

Over The Moon For You Both

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LV - 26

Ridiculously Low Standards

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LV -! 27

Love Definition

! NEW

LV - 29

Never Have Sex Standing Up… It Could Lead To Dancing

LV - 28

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I’ll Do Anything For Love But I won’t Do THAT

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! ! 929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com

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Than k you

A2 - 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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TH – 10 swallow

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TH – 11

Your friendship is a heartwarming reminder of what thoughtless bastards the rest of my friends are

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TH - 03

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A friend helps you move A good friend helps you move a body

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TH - 06

Now how the hell do I text on this thing?

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Your friendship is a heartwarming reminder of what thoughtless bitches the rest of my friends are

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TH – 13

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TH - 09

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I can’t thank you enough. Seriously. I don’t have time.

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TH - 07

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Thanks for everything!

Big ass thank you

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TH - 02

Blue flowers

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TH – 12

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TH – 04

I told you this would help get the taste out of your mouth

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Baby/ New Home

A2 – 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

BB - 01

BB - 02

Baaaby!

BB - 03

You’re in for a bumpy ride

Eat, Sleep, Poop, Cry

BB - 05

BB - 06

Time to start drinking

NEW

And this little piggy went to the liquor store

BB - 07

A Mother’s Greatest Sacrifice is 9 Months without Wine

NH - 03

NH - 04

New home

Congratulations on your new fixer upper!

Congratulations on your new home and achieving a level of debt others can only dream of!

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929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com

NH - 01


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G et W ell / S ym path y

A2 – 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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GW - 01

The good news is, I did a close inspection of your colon and it looks perfect.

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SY - 01

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Get better! Or else…

GW - 03

It could be worse

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GW -! 04

Get well soon so we can start making fun of you again and not feel bad

Sympathy blue

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GW - 02

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SY - 02

Sympathy green

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! SY - 03

Sympathy moon

929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com !

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m o t h e r ’s d a y

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A2 - 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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MD - 02

I love you mommy!

MD - 03

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Mom, when you said the dishwasher was loaded I thought you meant you’d been drinking again…

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! MD - 04

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MD - 05

According to legend, if you take a shower and scream “mom” out loud three times, a nice lady will come and bring you the towel you forgot

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Tina tinkles – the best baby ever! However, the teen years were a different story…

MD - 01

Always be fabulous!

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! MD - 06

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Happy mother’s day to my wonderful moms!

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F a t h e r ’s d a y A2 – 4.25” x 5.5” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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FD - 01

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FD - 02

To a guy who can do it all

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FD - 04

And the award for Father of the year goes to…

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FD - 03

I’ll always have you on a pedestal

Cheers!

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FD - 05

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FD - 06

To my two wonderful dads

To the coolest guy I know

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FD - 07

Dads! Proudly refusing to ask for directions since forever!

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929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com

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M a g n e t ic Note Pads

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$5.00 ea / Qtys of 4

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NEW

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NP - 08

Fancy Stuff

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Getting Shit Done

NEW

NP - 07

Oh God Not Another List!

! NP - 03

Arrive Ugly

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! NP - 02

I Was Going To Write Something Down

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NP - 04

Oh Shit! I Forgot Again

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NP - 05

Dinner Is Poured!

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NP - 09

Basic Food Groups

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NP - 01

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NEW

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NP - 06

Here’s Your Fucking List!

929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com

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D esk P a d s

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5” x 7” $5.50 ea / Qtys of 4

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NEW

DP – 01 Fucking Elegant

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DP – 02 Add That To My List

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DP – 03 Super Exciting Stuff

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DP – 04 Guess How Many

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DP – 05 Swear Words

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! NEW ! NEW ! This Year We’re Taking Your Lists to a new level. Our Desk pads have 50 lined sheets to fill with doodles, New Ideas or Actual Lists of Things You Need To Get Done. Plus, They Make You Look Super Organized…

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NEW

! NEW

NEW

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DP – 06 Who! Am I Kidding?

929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com

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J o u r n a ls

5” x 7” $6.50 ea / Qtys of 4

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NEW

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JL – 07

Women Getting Shit Done

NEW

JL - 09

Always Start Writing With A Clean Piece Of Paper

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NEW

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JL - 08

The Pen IS Mightier Than The Sword

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929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com


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J o u r n a ls

5” x 7” $6.50 ea / Qtys of 4

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JL – 01

I Hope You Plan on Writing That Shit Down! - M

JL - 03

I Need To Start Writing Stuff Down

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JL - 02

I Hope You Plan on Writing That Shit Down! - F

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929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com


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J o u r n a ls

5” x 7” $6.50 ea / Qtys of 4

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JL – 04

I hope someday to write something worth plagiarising

JL - 06

There Are No Words For Your Kind Of Cool

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JL - 05

No Great Story Ever Started With a Salad

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929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com


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P il l B o x e s

$9.50 ea / Qtys of 2

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NEW

PB - 01

500 Mgs of Fuckitol

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NEW

PB- 02

Vertical Enhancers

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PB - 03

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Medicated To perfection

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NEW

PB - 04

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NEW

PB - 05

NEW

PB - 07

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NEW

PB -! 08

My Meds Just Kicked In

NEW

Another Pill? Why Not

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NEW

PB -! 06

Happy Pills

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There’s A Pill For That

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Mood Stabilizers

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NEW

PB - 09

You’re Giving Me A Headache

929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com

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B u s in e s s C ard C ases

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$9.50 ea / Qtys of 2

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NEW

CC - 07

Business Bastard

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NEW

CC - 08

Business Bitch

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CC - 01

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CC - 09

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CC - 03 ! MY REPUTATION

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Business As Usual

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Women Getting Shit Done

NEW

CC - 02

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It Is Better To Arrive Late

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CC - 04

THE ROAD

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! CC - 05 ! MAGNIFICENT BASTARD

CC - 06 COOL

929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com

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C o m pact M ir r o r s

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$9.50 ea / Qtys of 2

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NEW

CM - 07

Damn, I’m Good

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NEW

CM - 08

Most of the Time She Was a Lady

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CM - 01

I’m Fucking Awesome!

CM - 09

Attitude Is Everything

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NEW

CM - 02

It Is Better To Arrive Late Than To Arrive Ugly

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CM !- 03

Before Wine I Judge Everyone

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CM - 04

Fabulous!

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CM -! 05

It’s Always 5pm Somewhere!

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CM - 06

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It IS Better To Look Good Than To Feel Good

929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com


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C o aster S ets

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$9.50 ea / Qtys of 4

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! ! ! CST – 03 You Look Like I Need Another Drink, Make Mine a Double, Drink Responsibly – Don’t Spill It, Bottoms Up!

NEW

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! ! ! CST – 04 ! Another Drink? Why Not, Fuck My Liver, I’ll Have What She’s Having, Shot Glasses Are For Pussies

Our Newest coaster sets! 8 New Designs for Your Friends and Family to Fight Over. Plus, Some Sexy New Packaging… •! Each set comes with 4 designs •! Water-resistant soft touch matte

finish •! Cork backed (your coffee table will thank you) •! Wipe clean with a damp cloth

* drinks not included

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929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com

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C o aster S ets

$9.50 ea / Qtys of 4

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! ! ! CST – 01 Dinner is Poured, Wine! Because no great story ever started with a salad, We go together like drunk & disorderly, Bitches be drinkin’

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CST – 02 ! Love the wine you’re with, here’s your fucking glass of wine, It’s always 5pm somewhere, alcohol - because it’s cheaper than therapy

Our coaster sets make drinking at home that much better! •! Each set comes with 4 designs •! Water-resistant soft touch matte

finish •! Cork backed (your coffee table will thank you) •! Wipe clean with a damp cloth

* drinks not included

!

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929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com

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Magnets

2” x 3” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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NEW MG – 23

You Rock!

NEW MG - 27

Looking Good Feeling Good

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NEW MG - 24

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NEW MG - 28

Fucking Elegant

F.U.C.K.

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NEW MG - 31

Crazytown

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NEW MG - 25

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NEW MG - 26

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NEW MG - 29

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NEW MG - 30

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Plot A Murder

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Born To Be Wild

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It’s Not An Act

Hey There Foxy!

! NEW MG - 32

Unstoppable!

! 929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com

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Magnets

2” x 3” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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MG – 01

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Dinner is poured!

MG - 13

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You look great for your age Almost life like

MG - 03

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MG - 07

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MG - 11

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It is better to arrive late Than to arrive ugly

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MG - 05

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MG - 06

He’d always had a way with the chicks

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There are no words for your kind of cool

Love the wine you’re with

MG - 04

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MG - 08

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I chose the road less traveled

We go together like drunk & disorderly

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MG - 09

Cheers! You magnificent bastard

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MG !- 10

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Wine! Because no great story ever started with a salad

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Let’s do a I’m on the gin & tonic diet So far I’ve lost juice cleanse! Two days! And by juice, I mean wine

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MG - !12

929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com


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Magnets

2” x 3” $2.25 ea / Qtys of 6

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MG – 14

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Well La De Fucking Da

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MG - 15 Oh Shit!

MG - 16

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MG - 21

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In dog years you’re dead - F

MG - 17

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MG - 22

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In dog years you’re dead - M

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MG - 19

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Women, Getting shit done since forever

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MG - 20

Bitch? Moi?

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Like I give a shit

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MG - 18

Bitches Be Drinkin’

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You’re not old You’re retro

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! 929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com


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G if t B a g s

$3.50 ea / Qtys of 4 ( 8” x 10” )

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NEW

NEW

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BG - 07 Big Splash !

BG - 10 I Couldn’t Be Bothered - M!

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NEW BG - 08 Don’t try This At Home! !!

NEW

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BG - 11 I Couldn’t Be Bothered - F!

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NEW

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NEW

BG - 09

You Rock!!

BG - 12

Looking Good Feeling Good!

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929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com

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G if t B a g s

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$3.50 ea / Qtys of 4 ( 8” x 10” )

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BG - 01

Well La De Fucking Da!

BG - 04

Here’s Your Fucking Present!!

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BG - 02

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Another Year Older - M

Another Year Older - F!

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BG - 03

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BG - 05

OMG! It’s Your Birthday?!

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BG - 06

You Are SO My Kind of Person!

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929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com


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E ver yd a y B o ttle B ag s

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$3.50 ea / Qtys of 4

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BTB - 01

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Dinner Is Poured

!!! ! !

BTB - 05 !

Bottoms Up!

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BTB - 02

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BTB - 06

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No Great Story Ever Started With a Salad

Juice Cleanse

BTB - 03

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BTB - 07

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We go Together Like Drunk & Disorderly

Love The Wine You’re With

BTB - 04

!

Cheers! You magnificent Bastard

BTB - 08

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Here’s Your Fucking Bottle Of Wine

929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com


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E ver yd a y B o ttle B ag s

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$3.50 ea / Qtys of 4

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BTB - 09

Cursive - F

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BTB - 10

Cursive - M

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BTB - 11

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My Favorite Mixed Drink

BTB - 12

She Could See It Was Time For More Wine

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929-210-9520 / www.umlautbrooklyn.com / umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com

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introducing

The Ümlaut Brooklyn Young Artist Grant How do we best give thanks for being able to run our own creative company? By supporting the next generation of young artists - specifically creative kids in high schools working hard so they can also have a future making a living In the arts. To do our part to help we’ve started The Ümlaut Brooklyn Young Artist Grant. For our pilot program we partnered with the Brooklyn High School of the Arts, a high school in New York that is providing amazing opportunities for students in fine arts, Music, Drama and Dance. In November 2018 we awarded our first grants, and we couldn’t be more excited. four stellar students, one from each grade, were awarded a grant to help fund either some extracurricular education or to help buy supplies that may have otherwise been out of reach. They’re all incredibly talented and have amazing careers ahead of them. We were honored to meet them and to offer our encouragement and support. And thanks to you we were able to do this. Every purchase you make from Ümlaut Brooklyn helps to make this possible and we can’t wait to watch it grow. Our dream is to expand it every year AND to encourage other creative companies to take this idea and replicate it in their communities. We’ve even created a template for how to run this grant program that we will happily give anyone who wants to do the same. All we ask is that they let us know what they’re doing so we can help promote it. To hear more about the program or to get the template to do this yourself email us at umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com or call us at 929-210-9520. It’s so simple to make this a reality in your community and we’d love to help you do it! Jocelyn & Roland ! !

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Ümlaut Brooklyn • All cards are A2 size (4.25 x 5.5) and un-greeted inside - Designed and printed in NY on 100% PCW paper and packed in eco-friendly sleeves. Our colorful matching envelopes are also made with recycled paper. • Bottle bags are Super sturdy; big enough for a bottle of champagne with wide twill handles to make carrying easy. Made with 40% grass pulp, durable and reusable. Bag dimensions: 15"H x 4.5"W x 4.5"D. • Gift bags are made to hold a ton of fun. Made of 100% bamboo fiber – a totally renewable resource. Bags are 8” x 4” x 10” with wide twill handles to make carrying easy. Our bags are durable, reusable and best of all re-giftable! • Magnets are made in the US - super strong to hold an endless amount of paper/cartoons/photos and miscellaneous crap onto your fridge and are guaranteed to make you smile! Magnets measure 2" x 3" and have a high gloss finish. • Journals are 5” x 7” spiral bound with 80 lined pages - Designed and printed in the US on 100% recycled paper. Sold in units of 4 @ $26.00. • Notepads are 3.5” x 8.5” with 50 lined sheets and a strong magnet on the back. Printed on 100% PCW paper. Make a list; you know you keep forgetting things… • Desk Pads are 5” x 7” • Compacts, Business Card cases and Pill boxes are all hand assembled in the US and feature our signature images protected by a clear epoxy dome.

ordering information: M in im u m o r d e r i s $ 1 3 5 . I n t e r n a t io n a l o r d e r s $ 4 0 0 + S h ip f r e e .

• All domestic orders ship VIA USPS. International orders ship via DHL. • Refunds & exchanges: Exchanges will be happily made with proof of an item’s damage – a photo will do nicely. All sales are final. • Exclusivity: we are aware of our retailer’s shopping territory and try to honor it as best we can.

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To place your order you can: Use our Website: www.umlautbrooklyn.com and click “Shop Wholesale” Call in your order to: 929-210-9520 Email us your order at: umlautbrooklyn@gmail.com About Us

Ümlaut Brooklyn is based in Brooklyn, NY. What motivates us every day is creating connections between people, bringing laughter and celebrating style. Our greeting cards have a distinctively outrageous sense of humor that serves as an unexpected counterpoint to gorgeous visuals. Retro and vintage inspired. Bright, Bold & Hip, we combine beautiful and unusual imagery with clever thoughtful writing to express every gamut of emotion. We bring that same style and wit to all of our other Products. We Are dedicated to using sustainable materials wherever possible. All paper is 100% PCW and all of our products are produced domestically. Ümlaut Brooklyn is sold throughout the United States and Canada and distributed in Australia and New Zealand.


2019 Umlaut Brooklyn Catalog  
2019 Umlaut Brooklyn Catalog  
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