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open window by Braudie Blais-Billie

I

t isn’t very often that one experiences complete silence in a city. These moments must be savored with a ceremonious cigarette out the window. Miami, New York, London, Paris. People famously complain about the noise of traffic and nightlife in these metropolis landscapes, and it’s generally true. But what isn’t as true is the idea that your problems stick to a certain area code, that moving around will keep you away from the tribulations of every day life. You can travel to all the different capitals of the world and still find the same kind of loneliness, the same kind of crippling self-doubt in the back of a dive bar clutching a Heineken. Olivia panicked at the bar, ordering a Heineken with a “knowing smile” because she had seen it in the movies so many times. It wasn’t the first time she had come to this place, but it was the first time she had done so alone. Take another sip and fade into the background. She fucking hated Heineken. A few months earlier, Olivia lost her wallet after blacking out. Though the first half of that Saturday started off painfully clear, it ended with hazy memories of kissing a faceless woman, throwing money at a taxi driver, slurring French, and eating a stale baguette in the kitchen at 5am after somehow finding her way home. “You were so gone,” Cathy said the next time they met, sipping Cokes at a sticky bar table somewhere downtown. Olivia’s eyes shot down to her glass. She looked up, grinning half-heartedly. “Yeah, how crazy was that night? I can barely remember anything. Hey Maxie, did you know that Cathy is from Philly?” The three girls were close to shouting over the music as sweaty bodies slid past their chairs on the way to the dance floor. A Britney Spears song just came on. “No way, you know I’m trying to go there after I graduate. My ex boyfriend wanted me to move to Arizona with him. But I was like, fuck that! I hate the dry heat.”

Profile for UGH Mag

UGH MAG | ISSUE 2  

Vol. 1, Issue 2

UGH MAG | ISSUE 2  

Vol. 1, Issue 2

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