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DECEMBER 15-21, 2011 WWW.TUCSONWEEKLY.COM • FREE

Our annual list of people, organizations and things Tucson would be better off without

BY THE USUAL GANG OF IDIOTS

PAGE 14


DIANA URIBE

DECEMBER 15-21 2011 VOL. 28, NO. 43

OPINION A woman with Tucson ties wants to become the first Native American woman elected to Congress.

Tom Danehy 4 Irene Messina 6 Jim Hightower 6

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Guest Commentary 8 Mailbag 8

CURRENTS The Skinny 9 By Jim Nintzel

Weak Prognosis 9 By Jim Nintzel

An appeals court rules that lawmakers should fund health care for poor Arizonans—but won’t make them do it Media Watch 10 By John Schuster

Captive Subjects 11 By Tim Vanderpool

Animal experts question a planned elephant move Weekly Wide Web 12 Compiled by Dan Gibson

Police Dispatch 12 By Anna Mirocha

We’ll bet you $10,000 that the Romney campaign is in big trouble.

On the Cusp of History 13 By Mari Herreras

A candidate with strong Tucson ties hopes to become the first Native American woman to serve in Congress

Hack Snort Welcome to our ninth annual Get Out of Town! issue. I’d like to make a late-breaking addition to this year’s list of dishonorees: the goddamn cold that’s been ravaging Tucson like a modern-day plague. It arrived at the Boegle household on Saturday, and I spent much of the day meandering around the house doing my best Bea Arthur impression. I knew I had a cold, but it felt minor, and I thought I was already getting over it when I felt halfway decent Saturday night. Then came Sunday, and with the new day came an intensified phlegm-fest. I spent a good chunk of the day editing copy for this week’s issue while hacking up my lungs, and I got to play a fun game: “Is that sentence incoherent, or am *I* incoherent?� When I woke up Monday, the frigging cold was even worse. I went through at least two boxes of tissue—no exaggeration—and was chided by co-workers for daring to come into the office. (Trust me: I would have preferred to be at home and guzzling chicken soup in bed. But we have a small staff.) I sneezed, snorted, coughed and hacked for much of the day, until the issue was far enough along that I could go home and take a fitful nap. As of this writing, it’s Tuesday, and the cold is finally subsiding. A little. A teeny, teeny bit. So far, I’ve only gone through a half-box of tissue today, but the skin around my nose is raw from all the honking and blowing. Bleh. Get out of town, you nasty-ass cold—and take all of these snotty tissues with you.

Our annual list of people, organizations and things Tucson would be better off without

CHOW

City Week 20 Our picks for the week

Mall Italian 36 By RenĂŠe Downing

Brio Tuscan Grille offers decent-enough chain fare

TQ&A 22 Ross Zimmerman, Beyond Tucson

Noshing Around 36 By Adam Borowitz

PERFORMING ARTS

MUSIC

Laughs for the Holidays 26

Jewish Soul Music 43

By Sherilyn Forrester

By Gene Armstrong

Tucson tradition and a traveling one-man show brighten up these dark December days

Neshama Carlebach and the Green Pastures Baptist Church Choir want to give people something to hold on to

Solstice Celebration 28

Soundbites 43

By Margaret Regan

By Stephen Seigel

ZUZI! marks the arrival of winter with help from some visual artworks

Club Listings 45 Nine Questions 49

VISUAL ARTS

Live 50

City Week listings 29

BOOKS

Rhythm & Views 51

Native Songs 31

MEDICAL MJ

By Jarret Keene

Ganja Gifts 52

Sing spotlights verse by contemporary indigenous poets

By J.M. Smith

There are indeed local businesses where you can buy presents for your medicalmarijuana-using loved ones

CINEMA Cracking Wise 32

CLASSIFIEDS

By Bob Grimm

Jonah Hill’s endearing shtick gets old rather quickly in The Sitter Film Times 33

Get Out of Town! 14 By the Usual Gang of Idiots

CULTURE

JIMMY BOEGLE, Editor jboegle@tucsonweekly.com

COVER ILLUSTRATION BY RAND CARLSON

Bitch Is Back 34 By Colin Boyd

Juno writer Diablo Cody gets back on track with this funny Charlize Theron vehicle Now Showing at Home 35

Comix 54ďšş55 Free Will Astrology 54 ÂĄAsk a Mexican! 55 Savage Love 56 Personals 60 Employment 61 News of the Weird 62 Real Estate 62 Rentals 62 Mind, Body and Spirit 63 Crossword 63 *Adult Content 56-60

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DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2011

TuCsONWEEKLY

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DANEHY OPINION

What gifts does Santa Tom have in his big sack?

WWW.TUCSONWEEKLY.COM P. O. BOX 27087, TUCSON, AZ 85726 (520) 294-1200

Thomas P. Lee Publisher

BY TOM DANEHY, tdanehy@tucsonweekly.com

EDITORIAL Jimmy Boegle Editor Jim Nintzel Senior Writer Irene Messina Assistant Editor Mari Herreras Staff Writer Linda Ray City Week Listings Dan Gibson Web Producer Margaret Regan Arts Editor Stephen Seigel Music Editor Bill Clemens Copy Editor Tom Danehy, Renée Downing, Ryn Gargulinski, Randy Serraglio, J.M. Smith Columnists Colin Boyd, Bob Grimm Cinema Writers Adam Borowitz, Rita Connelly, Jacqueline Kuder Chow Writers Sherilyn Forrester, Laura C.J. Owen Theater Writers Janice Biancavilla, Debbie Hadley, Kellie Mejdrich Editorial Interns Tim Glass Photography Intern Contributors Jacquie Allen, Gustavo Arellano, Gene Armstrong, Rob Brezsny, Max Cannon, Rand Carlson, Dave Devine, Michael Grimm, Matt Groening, Carl Hanni, Jim Hightower, Jarret Keene, David Kish, Anna Mirocha, Andy Mosier, Brian J. Pedersen, Dan Perkins, Michael Petitti, Ted Rall, Dan Savage, John Schuster, Chuck Shepherd, Tim Vanderpool SALES AND BUSINESS Jill A’Hearn Advertising Director Monica Akyol Inside Sales Manager Laura Bohling, Michele LeCoumpte, Alan Schultz, David White Account Executives Jim Keyes Digital Sales Manager Beth Brouillette Business Manager Robin Taheri Business Office Brean Marinaccio, Stephen Myers Inside Sales Representatives NATIONAL ADVERTISING: The Ruxton Group (888)-2Ruxton New York (212) 477-8781, Chicago (312) 828-0564, Phoenix (602) 238-4800, San Francisco, (415) 659-5545 PRODUCTION & CIRCULATION Andrew Arthur Art Director Laura Horvath Circulation Manager Gary Smathers Editorial Layout Kristen Beumeler, Shari Chase, Adam Kurtz, Duane Hollis, Josh Farris, Greg Willhite Production Staff

Tucson Weekly® (ISSN 0742-0692) is published every Thursday by Wick Communications at 3280 E. Hemisphere Loop,Tucson, Arizona. Address all editorial, business and production correspondence to: Tucson Weekly, P.O. Box 27087,Tucson, Arizona 85726. Phone: (520) 294-1200, FAX (520) 792-2096. First Class subscriptions, mailed in an envelope, cost $112 yearly/53 issues. Sorry, no refunds on subscriptions. Member of the Association of Alternative Newsmedia (AAN).The Tucson Weekly® and Best of Tucson® are registered trademarks of Wick Communications. Back issues of the Tucson Weekly are available for $1 each plus postage for the current year. Back issues from any previous year are $3 plus postage. Back issues of the Best of Tucson® are $5. Distribution: The Tucson Weekly is available free of charge in Pima County, limited to one copy per reader. Additional copies of the current issue of the Tucson Weekly may be purchased for $1, payable at the Tucson Weekly office in advance. Outside Pima County, the single-copy cost of Tucson Weekly is $1. Tucson Weekly may be distributed only by the Tucson Weekly’s authorized independent contractors or Tucson Weekly’s authorized distributors. No person may, without prior written permission of the Tucson Weekly, take more than one copy of each week’s Tucson Weekly issue. Copyright: The entire contents of Tucson Weekly are Copyright © 2011 by Wick Communications. No portion may be reproduced in whole or part by any means without the express written permission of the Publisher, Tucson Weekly, P.O. Box 27087, Tucson, AZ 85726.

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H

ere’s my Christmas gift list. You’re all welcome: New UA football coach Rich Rodriguez—A clock with a loud-ass alarm that goes off after the Wildcat players have participated in 20 hours of offseason workouts each week. The only thing worse than a team with a losing record is a team with a losing record that’s on NCAA probation! Tucson City Councilman Steve Kozachik—A second. As in, “I move that we honor Speedway Boulevard as Tucson’s greatest street named Speedway,” after which somebody else on the council says, “Second.”

Not that I care to see a Republican Tucson City Council, now or ever, but gee whiz, GOP; you’ve had two close misses in the past two elections and a HUGE blown opportunity in this one. (What do you think you could have done with those 25,000 protest votes that Green Party candidate Beryl Baker got in the Ward 1 race against Regina Romero?) The Arizona Daily Star—Some financial stability. After all these years, I still pick up the paper every morning and read it, front to back, although it takes me a lot less time than it used to. (And that’s not because I’ve become a faster reader as I’ve gotten older.) Arizona basketball coach Sean Miller—A more-discerning eye. I love this guy, and I love the fact that Arizona barely skipped a beat and is back in the national spotlight again. But he’s got to stop recruiting knuckleheads. A basketball coach can only bring in three or four players a year, and if one or two of them turn out to be defective, the coach is in trouble. The main problem is that a lot of today’s basketball players have been having their sorry butts kissed since they were 10 years old. They’re on travel teams; they get free gear; and everybody tells them how wonderful they are. What’s missing from the old days is that pickup game down at the park where the old guys would knock the young bucks around a bit, show them what’s up, and maybe teach them a little respect. I think that the entire club/Amateur Athletic Union system should be shunned by the NCAA. Make the meat-market summer tournaments off-limits to all college coaches, and the entire corrupt system would dry up overnight. I realize that the old days of a college coach sitting up in the bleachers on a January weeknight and watching a kid play for his high school are probably over. But with the Internet and other forms of electronic media, college coaches should be able to recruit without supporting a system that, at the

RANDOM SHOTS By Rand Carlson

very least, vastly distorts reality for players and parents, and quite often promotes criminal activity. Maybe the two knuckleheads who Miller has already had to deal with from this year’s recruiting class are just anomalies. We’ll see next year when Arizona brings in the top recruiting class in America. I’d much rather see a good coach (which Miller certainly is) deal with the 13th-best recruiting class in America, one made up of good kids who want to study and work hard, than have to put up with a bunch of pampered babies. President Barack Obama—Newt Gingrich as an opponent in the 2012 presidential election. I understand that Gingrich is a Catholic this month, and he has somehow outlasted the freaks (Bachmann), the dolts (Perry) and the deluded (Cain), but every time I see Gingrich, I’m reminded of the words that Gen. Taylor (played by Noble Willingham) said of Richard Nixon in Good Morning, Vietnam: “He lugs a trainload of shit behind him that could fertilize the Sinai. Why, I wouldn’t buy an apple from the son of a bitch, and I consider him a good, close, personal friend.” KOLD Channel 13 reporter Sonu Wasu—The urge to explain her name. Is that name common where she comes from, or did she lose a bet? The residents of the Rincon Heights neighborhood— Night-vision goggles for everyone! (Just in case they can’t see the giant block “A” on the south face of Arizona Stadium.) Former radio talk-show host Jim Parisi—I’m not quite sure what, but I know he needs something. He went from the primo position on KNST AM 790 to a spot on the much-cooler-but-lower-rated KVOI AM 1030 (where I do a show on some Saturday afternoons) to off the air. Some attribute the decline to an oversized ego, while others … no, pretty much everybody says it’s his ego. Tucson Mayor Jonathan Rothschild—A vision. Tucson City Councilwoman Karin Uhlich—Some of that spillover vision stuff from the mayor. Tucson City Councilwoman Regina Romero—A clue. Tucson City Councilwoman Shirley Scott—A second to Romero’s clue. The residents of Arizona—Enough money to buy up every copy of Jan Brewer’s book so the governor will think that she’s actually good at something and resign to devote herself to “writing” full-time. Graffiti jackasses—Paint fumes. Damaged fingers. Criminal records. Graffiti spray-painted on your houses by other jackasses. Eternity in hell. The clientele of Tucson’s medical marijuana industry—Good health. Or would that present a conundrum for some?


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MESSINA OPINION

There are far too many dogs trolling around online to allow anonymous comments HIGHTOWER BY JIM HIGHTOWER

IT’S ALL ABOUT JACK

BY IRENE MESSINA, imessina@tucsonweely.com

O

n the Internet, nobody knows you’re a dog.” That’s the caption with a now-classic cartoon by Peter Steiner, published in The New Yorker in July 1993. It pictures a dog sitting in an office chair at a computer, with one paw resting on the keyboard. The dog looks down at another dog seated on the floor and imparts the famous line. At the time, the public’s use of the Internet was in its infancy. Previously, it was used primarily by scientists, computer experts and engineers. Some points of reference: In 1993, America Online (as it was known then) connected “thousands of households” to the Internet. As of March 2011, the number of Internet users worldwide was almost 2.1 billion, as reported at internetworldstats.com. But Steiner’s caption—written nearly 20 years ago—still rings true today. Do we really know who we are talking to? When we claim to know who’s on the other end—designated as “friends” or “connections”—we often have never met the person. “

Look out! Here comes Jack, trying to jack us around again. Jack Abramoff, the über-corrupt K-Street lobbyist who turned his name into a synonym for sleazeball, is now out and about. Out of prison, that is, running around the country in a narcissistic celebrity-redemption campaign. Yes, Jack wants to turn his personal sleaziness into fame, cash, sympathy … and even admiration. “The hope is I can use my natural infamy in a positive way,” he recently told The New York Times. Positive—for himself, of course. That’s why this ex-con now has a publicist, literTaking Steiner’s caption a little further, there are plenty of ary agent, lawyer, producer, Facebook page, “dogs” on the Internet: They are the ones posting rude, website, Twitter feed and all the other nasty and inappropriate comments on blogs and comment accoutrements of the modern fame game. boards. And we still don’t know who they are. Abramoff has already published a book But this is beginning to change. about—what else?—himself. He’s been all The Arizona Republic recently announced a new comover the TV-talk-show circuit, talking about ment policy: In order to comment on The Republic’s site, himself. And he’s available (for a fee) to you will need a Facebook account. The Republic is not the give motivational speeches based on the life first publication to make this change. The New York Times, experiences of—guess who?—Jack. Now, The Washington Post and The Wall Street Journal, among there’s a feature film in the works, and he’s others, require some sort of registration in order to compitching a reality TV show—both about himment. The Washington Post site even requires your job self. “Self” might as well be Jack’s middle industry, job title and primary responsibilities. (Editor’s name (though he’ll still answer to “sleazenote: Anonymous comments are allowed at TucsonWeekly. ball”). com, but remarks that violate our Comments Policy are Even with all of the attention he’s getremoved. One thing against the rules is name-calling.) ting, there’s a whininess in Abramoff’s rebranding effort. He seems to think that he’s some THIS MODERN WORLD By Tom Tomorrow sort of victim. “All I want,” he says, “is for people not to see me as this cartoon monster.” Come on, Jack; try that whine on those Indian tribes you duped into your lobbying operation just a few years ago. You pocketed millions of dollars in fees from them, did nothing to help them, and then privately mocked them to your guffawing cohorts as “losers,” “monkeys” and “troglodytes.” He still owes them $40 million. That’s pretty monstrous. Abramoff couldn’t clean the sleaze off with a king-size can of Comet and a wire brush—much less a PR campaign.

6 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

Randy Lovely, senior vice president of news and audience development for The Arizona Republic, explained the reasons behind the policy change. He wrote: In the early days (just a few years ago) of online commenting, I embraced the Wild West freedom that the tools provided in allowing citizens to speak freely about their ideas. Over time, my sentiments have changed as the tone and civility of the anonymous remarks have soured. … At first, I defended the range of remarks; then I began to grow concerned about the tenor, and I finally became disgusted. The final straw came for me earlier this year. In the aftermath of the tragic shooting near Tucson, comments such as these were all too pervasive: WeElectedIdiots2: “I guess a politician with half a brain is better than the rest of the idiots that get elected.” AZJavaRooster: “She should be up for Canonization soon! oh, God! she was heard to say, ‘Well if I had half a mind …’” In some corners, this move may be controversial since some users love the shroud of secrecy. But we hope that the use of Facebook will lead to an immediate increase in civility. … If you believe strongly enough about something to comment on it, be brave enough to own your comment. While there are some positive responses to Lovely’s post at azcentral.com, many people disagree with it. Some claim it’s a form of censorship; others refuse to join Facebook; and a few fear reprisals from “nut jobs” who might track them down if they posted their real name. Other points: Not being anonymous will reduce the number of comments; and anonymity allows for more-honest posts. In some public circles, it seems “honesty” is synonymous with name-calling. In 2007, Mike Conway, an assistant professor of journalism at Indiana University, conducted a study to determine how many times commentator Bill O’Reilly resorted to name-calling during his “Talking Points Memo” segment. Volunteers watched 105 episodes and reported that O’Reilly called someone a name 2,209 times during a total of more than 248 minutes, or nearly nine times per minute. If this type of discourse is taking place on TV screens, it stands to reason that some of this will spill onto computer screens. Add the opportunity for anonymity, and you have lots of O’Reillys—all unidentifiable—spewing forth rude, crude and insensitive comments. There’s nothing wrong with expressing one’s opinion in the face of opposing views. One would hope people could do this politely—but it hasn’t always been the case online. Remove the secret identities, and we’ll have a lot fewer dogs to contend with.


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TuCsONWEEKLY

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MAILBAG

GUEST COMMENTARY

Send letters to P. O. Box 27087, Tucson, AZ 85726. Or e-mail to mailbag@tucsonweekly.com. Letters must include name, address and daytime phone number. Letters must include signature. We reserve the right to edit letters. Please limit letters to 250 words.

OPINION

SWAT Team in Guerena Incident Was Looking for a Confrontation Good article (“Tactical Terror,” Nov. 24). A Girl Scout could have served the search warrant on the Guerena household while she was delivering cookies. The problem is the mindset of almost all of lawenforcement officers. It is far beyond just an “us versus them” mentality. They believe that not only is everyone a possible suspect, but guilty as well. They dressed like they were going to war rather than simply serving a search warrant. There is no one watching the watchers. Mike Morrison

Medical-Marijuana Fees Are Extortion Money Kirk Muse (“Getting an MMJ Card Should Be as Easy as Getting a Handicap-Parking Placard,” Mailbag, Nov. 24) didn’t pay $150 for a “privilege.” Muse paid extortion money to the government for protection from police for using a plant that God already gave permission to use on the very first page of the Bible. Every citizen that supports and enables cannabis prohibition, persecution and extermination should be ashamed. Stan White

Catholic Church’s LiturgicalLanguage Changes Are Like Rearranging the Titanic’s Deck Chairs My theoretical psych/social explanation for changes in the Catholic liturgical language and Tom Danehy’s reaction (Nov. 24) is the Vatican hierarchy’s extreme remorse, disillusionment and guilt for the past 50 years of history of pedophile clergy and the need to reassert control and power. Rather than offering a mea maxima culpa to the faithful; giving financial restitution to victims; and punishing bishops like they did the accused coaches at Penn State and Syracuse, the Vatican tinkered with the English liturgical language to stave off the money hemorrhage and faithful exodus by rearranging and redecorating the deck chairs on the Titanic. The Rev. Lawrence Quilici Retired Catholic/married/widowed priest

8 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

While the border wall barely slows smugglers, it effectively stops the migration of wildlife BY JANAY BRUN

I

recently moved from Sasabe, a tiny town located next to the border wall. The wall was built of bars 15 feet tall and looked like a long prison cell. It ran 4 miles east until it hit an arroyo on the Buenos Aires National Wildlife Refuge, and 3 miles west until it met the foothills of the Pozo Verde Mountains. I lived in Sasabe for seven months, and when I left, the population was reduced to 11 people. I’d become familiar with the town while documenting signs of mountain lions on the neighboring wildlife refuge for eight years. Every day, I saw the wall, National Guard troops, Border Patrol agents and the billion-dollar, high-technology surveillance towers that did not work.

Sometimes, I witnessed illegal immigrants walking in the Arizona desert, and I’d sometimes run into drug-smugglers resting under mesquite trees close to my home. From the perspective of a resident of Sasabe, border enforcement seemed like an illusion, the wall an expensive prop. A group of 15 illegal immigrants once ran through the empty lot next to my home, jumped into a pickup truck and sped off. They came from the direction of the wall, though that section was monitored by a National Guard lookout. It took four days before a Border Patrol agent showed up. Corruption involving the Border Patrol is well-documented, but the most-appalling story about flawed border enforcement while I lived and worked in the area involved Border Patrol Agent Brian Terry. He was killed while on duty by border bandits who used a weapon provided by Operation Fast and Furious, which was run through the Arizona U.S. Attorney’s Office and the Phoenix office of the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives. This operation supplied weapons to criminals in hopes of tracking them to Mexican cartels. I was told that after Terry’s death, agents began questioning why they should put their lives on the line when they might be gunned down with a weapon provided by their fellow agencies. Meanwhile, illegal immigrants kept climbing over the wall with the aid of ropes and crude ladders—or by just walking around it. According to a refuge officer, drugsmugglers started carrying loads of marijuana cut to fit through the 4-inch spaces between the bars of the wall. It seemed the only thing the wall could stop was the migration of wildlife. Usually, the Department of Homeland Security did not care about wildlife, though in September 2008, one incident definitely bothered officials. A Border Patrol agent within the Buenos Aires refuge saw a mountain lion running back

and forth in front of the wall, apparently frantic to get to the other side. He also saw the lion trying to stick its head through the bars of the wall. The sight was so alarming that the agent took several photos and video of the lion’s effort, and some of his photos ran in a few news outlets. After I received a phone call from the refuge about the lion, I placed a remote camera near the wall in case the animal returned. A few months later, my camera disappeared. Thanks to the help of refuge officers, I learned that the Border Patrol had confiscated my camera. Initially, the chief patrol agent informed me that my camera had been “removed” because agents weren’t sure who it belonged to and didn’t want the “bad guys” monitoring them. Weeks later, my camera was returned, and I had a chance to question a Border Patrol liaison officer, who offered another explanation: Officials in the agency had seized the video of the lion and my camera, because images of wildlife trapped by the wall were viewed as a potential public-relations nightmare. The wall had been controversial from the onset because it went through the wildlife refuge, and if refuge officials had tried to block construction, there’s no question they would have failed. All Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff had to do was invoke the REAL ID Act passed by Congress in 2005, which circumvented all environmental laws and safeguards. As for the lion, its fate is unknown. The flow of illegal immigrants and drug-smugglers remains constant, though, because for them, the wall is just a minor obstacle, a temporary barrier. Janay Brun is a contributor to Writers on the Range, a service of High Country News (hcn.org). She recently moved to Pennsylvania, where she is writing a book about her experience as a whistleblower in a case involving an endangered species.


CURRENTS

THE SKINNY

An appeals court rules that lawmakers should fund health care for poor Arizonans—but won’t make them do it

ROCKET MAN

Weak Prognosis BY JIM NINTZEL, jnintzel@tucsonweekly.com he Arizona Court of Appeals told Gov. Jan Brewer last week that she and GOP lawmakers were obligated to provide health-care coverage to Arizonans beneath the federal poverty line. But in a ruling released last Tuesday, Dec. 6, the justices concluded they had no power to actually force the lawmakers to provide the funding for the AHCCCS program, despite “the human suffering that has occurred and will unquestionably continue to occur as a consequence” of the health-care cuts. Tim Hogan, the attorney who sued the state, vowed to appeal the ruling to the Arizona Supreme Court. While Hogan wouldn’t count the case as a win in his fight to reverse Gov. Jan Brewer’s cuts in health-care coverage for low-income Arizonans, the appeals court agreed with half of his fundamental argument: The state is obligated to provide health insurance to any Arizonan under the federal poverty line. That’s a reversal of a Maricopa County Superior Court ruling in Brewer’s favor that essentially said the Legislature did not need to fund the program, because voters couldn’t force lawmakers to fund certain programs through the initiative process. Here’s the legal twist: Even though the judges believe the state should be providing health-care coverage, the appeals court concluded that it lacked the authority to order the Legislature to fund the program. “The court says, ‘There’s a mandatory directive to do this; we just can’t do anything about it if (legislators) don’t,’” says Hogan, the executive director of the Arizona Center for Law in the Public Interest. Hogan hopes to persuade the Arizona Supreme Court that if lawmakers are indeed obligated to provide the health-care coverage, the court should rule that they are also obligated to fund the program. He says the court did just that once when it ordered the state to spend money on school construction. “I get that the court does not want to get involved in setting budget priorities, but there are certain things that the law requires money be spent on, and this is one of them,” Hogan says. While the justices knocked down some of her lawyers’ central arguments, Brewer celebrated the court’s ruling. “I am pleased that the Arizona Court of Appeals affirmed the Superior Court’s dismissal of this case and recognized that this issue involves a political decision entrusted to the legislative and executive branches of state govern-

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ment per the Arizona Constitution,” Brewer said in a statement. “I also commend the court for taking into account that, had the freeze not been implemented, devastating cuts to other critical state services such as K-12 education and public safety would have been imminent.” The state started providing health-care coverage to any Arizonan below the federal poverty level through the Arizona Health Care Cost Containment System after voters approved Proposition 204 on the 2000 ballot. While some of the coverage was paid for by money that the state received as part of a tobacco-lawsuit settlement, most of the money came from the state’s general fund. To help balance the budget, state lawmakers cut AHCCCS funding by more than $500 million during this year’s legislative session. The Brewer administration eliminated eligibility for childless adults, although she allowed anyone now on AHCCCS to remain covered unless they fail to complete renewal paperwork on time. Since lawmakers are prohibited from changing laws passed by the voters, Hogan sued the state. The Arizona Supreme Court declined to stop the cuts and told Hogan to start the case at the Superior Court level. The reduction in state funding for the program has resulted in lower federal funding for health care in Arizona, because the feds provide a 2-to-1 match for most of the state dollars spent on AHCCCS. State Rep. Matt Heinz, a Democrat who represents Tucson’s downtown and southside, says the cuts to AHCCCS are bad for low-income

Arizonans who now must seek care in emergency rooms rather than treating chronic diseases before they are in crisis. But the cuts are also hurting Arizona’s hospitals, which are obligated to provide care even if patients are uninsured. “The hospitals are still taking care of these folks, but they’re not getting any reimbursement to help cover those costs,” says Heinz, a Tucson Medical Center emergency-room physician. “That means some of these hospitals may fold. … Rural ERs are going to start blinking out.” Jim Dickson, the CEO of Bisbee’s Copper Queen Hospital, says that rural hospitals are getting hammered as a result of the cuts in AHCCCS funding, with most seeing their charity and uncompensated care costs at least double. At the Copper Queen, uncompensated and charity care have increased from $241,000 in the first five months of last fiscal year to $610,000 in the first five months of the current fiscal year. “The increase is growing every month,” says Dixon. “The percentage is growing every month. It’s accelerating every month.” Dixon is working with 16 other rural hospitals and the Brewer administration to develop a program that would allow them to voluntarily contribute dollars to the state that would be eligible for the two-to-one federal match; that money would then be returned in some form to the consortium. Federal officials are still weighing whether to approve the proposal. “They’re taking a long time to make a decision, but I’d rather them take a long time and get a ‘yes’ than get a quick ‘no,’” Dickson says.

When he visited Tucson last week, former astronaut Mark Kelly disappointed those who are hoping that he’ll run for Congress in the place of his wife, U.S. Rep. Gabrielle Giffords, if she can’t run next year. In a conversation with NPR journalist Ted Robbins last Tuesday, Dec. 6, at the UA’s Centennial Hall, Kelly said that “my job is to make sure she can run for office”—a line that got a thunderous round of applause from the full house that had turned out to GABRIELLE see Kelly. Still, you only had to see Kelly on stage at Centennial—or earlier in the day, when he turned up at Mesa Verde Elementary School to return a yearbook he’d taken into space to honor Christina-Taylor Green, the 9-year-old girl who was killed in the shooting spree that wounded Giffords—to know that he’d make one hell of a candidate, if that’s the road he chooses. Kelly was, at turns, charming, funny and resolute as he talked about how he met Giffords, what it was like to travel in space, and how he has worked to help Gabby recover from being shot through the head—all topics that are covered in depth in the book he has co-written with Giffords, Gabby: A Story of Courage and Hope. He told the crowd that he remains in awe of how determined Gabby is to heal: “She marches out that door every day and works hard.” Kelly said that Giffords will decide whether to seek re-election within the next few months. “That’s going to be made on her own timeline,” he said. He told the crowd that Gabby wants to come back to her hometown. “Right now, we spend most of our time in Houston,” he said. “Eventually, we’ll probably spend all of our time in Tucson.”

COLLAPSING CASE

TOM

State Attorney General Tom Horne suffered another big defeat in Maricopa County Superior Court last week when Judge Dean M. Fink ruled that the Independent Redistricting Commission is not subject to Arizona’s open-meeting law, because the Arizona Constitution lays out different requirements for the five-member panel. For months, Horne pursued an investigation into whether IRC chairwoman Colleen Mathis had violated the law during the process of hiring a consultant to help the commission draw Arizona’s political boundaries. When he launched the investigation, Horne told a gathering of Tea Party activists that if he could prove Mathis had violated the law, he could then seek her removal from the IRC. Horne was eventually removed from the case by Fink, who concluded that Horne had a conflict of interest in pursuing the case, because attorneys from the AG’s office had also provided the

CONTINUED ON PAGE 11 DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2011

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A Hawaii watchdog group failed in its efforts to get the Federal Communications Commission to intervene in a shared-resource arrangement between Raycom and television-station owner MCG Capital that allows Raycom to control production and news content for three stations. The deal is similar to Raycom’s recent contract to provide news content for Beloowned KMSB Channel 11 in Tucson, which is scheduled to take effect on Feb. 1. Media Council Hawaii argued that the move should be disallowed on the grounds that it gives Raycom controlling interest in two of the top four stations in the market, which the Media Council views as a violation of the FCC’s duopoly rule. But because there is no transfer of the ownership license, the FCC says the “applicability of the duopoly rule to these circumstances is problematic, and finding a violation of that rule in this case would be similarly problematic.” However, the FCC has taken notice of these types of arrangements, which now total more than 50 nationally. “We do believe that further action on our part is warranted with respect to this and analogous cases,” the FCC ruling said. “Our decision here does not preclude us from considering in the context of licensing proceedings whether the actions taken by the licensees in this case, or analogous actions by other licensees, are consistent with the public interest.” In Tucson, CBS affiliate KOLD Channel 13, owned by Raycom, and Fox affiliate KMSB, owned by Belo, are two of the top four stations. Raycom receives $208,333 per month from MCG as part of the Hawaii deal.


CURRENTS

THE SKINNY CONTINUED

Animal experts question a planned elephant move

from Page 9

Captive Subjects

commission with advice on how to follow the law. Horne dished off the investigation to Maricopa County Attorney Bill Montgomery, but IRC attorneys argued in court that under the state Constitution, the redistricting commission was actually bound by a different standard than Arizona’s open-meeting law. In a ruling released last Friday, Dec. 9, Fink concluded that applying the open-meeting law would allow the Legislature to mess with the independent body, and would leave the IRC open to harassment from “prosecutors such as the attorney general and the various county attorneys, all of whom are empowered to investigate alleged open-meeting law violations. The threat of prosecution, even a baseless one, can be reasonably expected to intimidate its target.” Fink added that the court “further finds that neither the attorney general nor the Maricopa County attorney may proceed in their investigation, except as provided by the rules of procedure for special actions.” Montgomery has vowed to appeal the ruling, but it’s yet another example of how so far, the efforts of Republican officials to gin up criminal charges against the Independent Redistricting Commission have been thoroughly rejected by Arizona’s court system.

he Denver Zoo debacle might be considered a cautionary tale. In the summer of 2001, an elephant named Hope rampaged through the facility, scaring crowds and nearly injuring a mother and her child. The 6,700-pound animal was purportedly startled when a trainer dropped a 30-gallon drum. Just a few days earlier, one elephant had knocked another over, and because the zoo didn’t have the necessary hoist to raise the fallen elephant, it was euthanized. To an increasing number of animal behaviorists, such outbursts are hardly surprising. Elephants are quite aware of their captivity, these researchers argue, and suffer from a form of post-traumatic stress similar to that displayed by people who have been imprisoned or experienced war. This trauma is only exacerbated, they say, by a zoo industry that chooses to ignore what science reveals about the suffering of captive animals. Instead, zoos shuffle elephants from facility to facility “like so much furniture,” one researcher says, disrupting the bonding patterns instinctual to these highly intelligent creatures. And according to elephant advocates, nowhere is the denial of known science more on display than at Tucson’s Reid Park Zoo, where officials plan to separate two elephants that have resided together for nearly 30 years. It’s all part of a deeper malaise within zoo culture, says Gay Bradshaw, founder of Oregon’s Kerulos Center, which promotes the scientific understanding of sentience among animals. She’s also the author of Elephants on the Edge: What Animals Teach Us About Humanity, a psychological portrait of elephants in captivity published by Yale University Press. According to Bradshaw, plans to separate the Reid Park elephants, Connie and Shaba, disregard what science tells us about the intense bonds these animals can share. “Social relationships are extremely important for psychological as well as physical health,” she says. “It’s underestimated in animals. But with elephants, it’s very well-documented that they have complex sociality. “You can look at it from a health perspective, and you can look at it from an ethical perspective. The reality is that these (elephants) are essentially in a concentration camp. They’re in the same type of situation that brings on complex post-traumatic stress disorder. The neurosciences and neurobiology show that stress and trauma such as what the elephants sustain is incredibly damaging.” Just how damaging was detailed a few years ago, Bradshaw says, in a study appearing in the magazine Science. The article “talked about how,

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on average, zoo elephants live half as long as free-living elephants.” Similar concerns are raised by Marc Bekoff, a professor emeritus of ecology and evolutionary biology at the University of Colorado at Boulder, and the author of several books about animal behavior. He says the Denver Zoo incident illustrates how such facilities are creating stress for elephants. Reid Park Zoo is another example, he says, pointing to the zoo officials’ evolving assertions that Connie and Shaba are not necessarily bonded. “For them to say that Connie and Shaba won’t miss one another is just a self-serving justification for what they’re doing,” Bekoff says. “They will miss one another. Elephants are among the most social animals there are, and they form long-term bonds.” He predicts that the move would take a noticeable toll on both animals, “from apathy and depression to possibly even death.” But Sue Tygielski, an animal behaviorist at the Reid Park Zoo, says precautions have been taken to ensure that Connie and Shaba experience a smooth transition. Connie, a 44-year-old Asian elephant, will be sent to the San Diego Zoo, making way for a small herd of African elephants to be moved from that zoo to Tucson. The San Diego Zoo “is designed for geriatric elephants, and (Connie) is becoming one,” Tygielski says. “That facility will be able to accommodate all of her needs. And Shaba, our African, is still younger, so she will have an opportunity to be in a family setting for the first time in her adult life” with the elephants being transferred here. These animals will be bred as part a national effort to boost the number of zoo elephants, and to allow the San Diego Zoo to split its growing herd. To officials such as Tygielski, that makes this transfer beneficial in a larger sense, even though the two longtime companions will be separated. “When we weigh those bonds with what their options are, both for physical health and continued mental health, I think we’re seeing that (this) option is better,” she says. Tygielski also questions just how bonded the animals are, contradicting statements made by zoo director Susan Basford in 2006, when Basford noted that they were “acclimated to each other, or bonded to each other and to their keepers.” Or statements made to the Arizona Daily Star a year earlier by Gale Ferrick, who spent more than two decades caring for the two elephants. “Their bond is very deep,” Ferrick told the paper. “If Shaba makes even the slightest noise, any kind of alarm, Connie rushes over to her and

TIM VANDERPOOL

BY TIM VANDERPOOL, tvanderpool@tucsonweekly.com

Sue Tygielski: “The San Diego Zoo is designed for geriatric elephants, and Connie is becoming one. That facility will be able to accommodate all of her needs." stands guard over her.” Funny how things change. “That was Gale’s interpretation, versus my interpretation,” Tygielski says. “Gale watched them with the eye of a loving trainer. But when you watch them from the outside of the exhibit as a behaviorist, there’s a difference.” But to critics such as Gay Bradshaw, that “difference” exists for one simple reason: “Science is being used selectively,” she says, noting that all vertebrates, from chimpanzees to elephants, “have the same ability to suffer, to feel, to have a sense of self, to have consciousness. That’s what the neurobiology says—that they’re the same as us.” Of course, admitting that carries with it enormous societal implications, affecting everything from the way we consume meat and use animals for medical research to the way we hold them captive in zoos. “But people don’t want to go there,” Bradshaw says. “Why? Because of the ethical implications. It would mean that we’d have to overturn the fundaments of our culture.” That seems rather unlikely, given that critics can’t even keep the Reid Park Zoo from separating two longtime animal companions named Connie and Shaba. “From what I understand, these two elephants have a very close relationship,” Bradshaw says. “Why can’t we do the right thing—the simple, humane thing of respecting a relationship between these two individuals who, after their whole lives of being traumatized and suffering and being threatened, still have the capacity to feel and to care for one another?”

GRIJALVA’S PALS CRY WOLF

RAÚL

Former state lawmaker Amanda Aguirre of Yuma confirmed last week that she’s considering a challenge to Congressman Raúl Grijalva in next year’s Democratic primary. From what we hear, she’s not the only one who wants to join the race. Grijalva, who doesn’t much care for fundraising or campaigning, narrowly escaped losing his heavily Democratic district to a GOP newcomer last year after he made the political blunder of calling for a boycott of his own state. So it’s hardly surprising that he might face challengers from within his own party. News of the challenge triggered this shocking revelation in a fundraising letter from former Democratic presidential hopeful Howard Dean: “Arizona Republicans are looking for a power grab. They’ve redrawn the boundaries of his district to remove Democrats and replace them with conservative voters. At least one conservative Democrat has already announced intentions to run against Raúl in a primary. And after a tough fight last election, you can bet Republicans have no intention of sitting this election out.” Holy cow! Republicans have redrawn the boundaries of Grijalva’s district to remove Democrats? OK, we know there are many angles to the redistricting battle, but it’s still shocking to learn that the Independent Redistricting

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POLICE DISPATCH BY ANNA MIROCHA mailbag@tucsonweekly.com

SPECIAL DELIVERY EAST DESERT STRAW LANE NOV. 16, 2:18 P.M.

A man found poop smeared on and around his home after returning from a trip to Las Vegas, according to a Pima County Sheriff’s Department report. The man told deputies that when he came home, he found what he believed to be dog feces on his garage door and wrought-iron house door. He said he also found feces in his mailbox, along with a letter, which he didn’t touch. It turned out to be a bill. The man told deputies that he had received an anonymous note earlier. He said he had been in an on-and-off relationship with a woman for about six months, but that he didn’t believe the note was from her. He speculated that the note might have come from someone she knew who didn’t like him. The report said nothing about the contents of the note. Deputies took photos of the feces.

A BEAUTIFUL MIND UA AREA DEC. 2, 1:23 P.M.

A University of Arizona student used dubious evidence to accuse a stranger of damaging his vehicle, a UA Police Department report stated. The student told police that his silver 1996 Camaro had been struck while parked in the Main Gate Garage, 815 E. Second St. The reporting officer noted that the car’s rear bumper paint was cracked, and there was a black mark on it about 6 inches long and 2 inches wide. The student said the damage had occurred the day before. After studying in the library for finals all day, the student said, he returned to his car and saw the damage. He said he didn’t report the incident that day, because he was too tired from studying. However, the student told police that immediately after returning to his car, he saw a silver 2004 Honda parked nearby that also had damage to its rear bumper. He told police he was certain that it was the car that had hit his vehicle. When he met with the reporting officer at the parking lot, a silver Honda was parked near the garage entrance. The student claimed it was the same car he had seen earlier. When asked if he written down the license-plate number, he told police that he had a “photogenic” memory. He couldn’t explain how a silver car could have made a black mark on his vehicle. Police gave the student a victims’ rights form.

W E E K LY W I D E W E B

People Really Like Chuck George nless something changes within the next few weeks, 2011 will mark my first full calendar year of working here at the Tucson Weekly. It’s been fun to get a sense of what people are interested in over the course of the year, and I can say without reservation that people in Tucson are very concerned about KOLD Channel 13’s Chuck George and his well-being. Of the nearly 3,500 posts that appeared on The Range in 2011, two were about Chuck George. One announced his leave of absence in early September, and the other, on Oct. 24, broke the news of his return to the air—and both posts as of now are among the 10 most popular of the year. Four of the remaining 10 were connected to the Jan. 8 shooting. The other four were a post about a local woman appearing in Playboy; a post about Christian Halloween replacement JesusWeen; a post about the closing of downtown restaurant Grill; and a post regarding Roseanne Barr talking about TV. Chuck George is a notable media figure, and the semi-mysterious circumstances surrounding his time away from the newscasts did lead to some extra interest in the story—so what really surprised me was the number of comments wishing George well that were left long after the post was published. I haven’t personally noticed if George is a better weatherman or more charming than his rivals on the other channels, but whatever he’s doing to engage the audience, he should keep it up.

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—Dan Gibson, Web Producer dgibson@tucsonweekly.com

THE WEEK ON THE RANGE We watched Jon Stewart smack down Sen. John McCain (again); shared some leaked guidelines the federal government is using in its crackdown on medical marijuana; wondered whether Rick Perry was high when he made that weird gaybashing ad claiming that Obama was leading a war against Christianity; told you that the courts once again denied Arizona Attorney General Tom Horne’s efforts to undermine the Independent Redistricting Commission; and brought you the latest edition of Arizona Illustrated’s Political Roundtable, moderated by Jim Nintzel. We discovered that the Arizona Democratic Party was out to ruin Project White House 2012, our reality-journalism competition that allows you to run for president (but only on the Republican ticket now); introduced you to the first candidate to announce he was joining Project White House 2012; found new ways to promote this weekend’s Great Cover-Up (find details in Soundbites); shared more recommendations from our music writers; and told you that Andrew Bird, Tool, Childish Gambino and Noam Chomsky are all coming to town. We brought you the latest cycling news; told you how to mix up a hot toddy; wondered why there are no Tucson establishments on Food and Wine’s list of the Best Bars in America; and celebrated the opening of Borderlands Brewing Company in the downtown Warehouse District and the Bisbee Breakfast Club on Ina Road. We told you what Major League Soccer teams were going to be visiting Tucson as part of the Desert Diamond Cup in February; advised you on what baby names to avoid in 2012; broke down the differences between Republicans and Democrats when it comes to watching TV; gave Cub Scouts a tour of Weekly World Central; realized that Katy Perry was going to ruin our Saturday; talked about comic books; worried about depressed moms; and wondered about designer vaginas.

COMMENT OF THE WEEK “Ahh. I was glad before the Tucson Weekly hired you, Dan. It was a better paper before it went corporate. … You, Dan, are writing for a third-tier paper in a second-tier city.” —TucsonWeekly.com commenter “billly” jumped to the defense of a musician making a silly statement (“Today’s Nü-Rock Political Moment From Korn,” The Range, Dec. 10).

BEST OF WWW We launched Project White House 2012 (aka Project White House: Electoral Boogaloo) two weeks ago, and now we have a dedicated webpage (www.tucsonweekly.com/tucson/ ProjectWhiteHouse2012/Page) recapping all of the latest news on the Arizona presidential primary front, including the candidates who have announced so far; the best homemade campaign ads; and, of course, a reminder that you should not come down to our offices as part of the race for the Tucson Weekly endorsement. (Seriously, please don’t come by.) The shockingly easy-to-fillout nomination form is on the page, too, so don’t miss your opportunity to add “presidential candidate in the state of Arizona” to your résumé. This chance only arises every four years, after all.

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CURRENTS

THE SKINNY CONTINUED

A candidate with strong Tucson ties hopes to become the first Native American woman to serve in Congress

from Page 11

On the Cusp of History

Commission is following the Republican Party’s orders and disenfranchising Grijalva—especially considering that the last time we checked the draft maps, it looked like Yuma would be split so that conservative voters were shifted into a Republican district that includes most of the rural areas of western Arizona. Who knew those folks were Grijalva’s secret weapon?

BY MARI HERRERAS, mherreras@tucsonweekly.com

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In these mining towns, residents have told them how refreshing it is to have politicians actually knock on their doors. “That hasn’t happened in a long time,” Cruz says. They’ve also gone into the Navajo and Hopi reservations, bringing members of both sides of the family—Mexican American and Native American—in a concerted effort to get Benally Baldenegro elected. Benally Baldenegro married Baldenegro Jr. this year. The couple met while volunteering for Randy Parraz’s unsuccessful 2010 U.S. Senate campaign. Baldenegro Jr.’s father is a well-known local activist who is credited with helping start Tucson’s Chicano-rights movement in the late 1960s and early 1970s. His mother’s family has strong union roots. (See “Being Baldenegro,” March 31.) Benally Baldenegro grew up in Kayenta, a small town in the Navajo Nation. Her father is an engineer who moved the family there when he got a job at the Peabody Coal mine near Black Mesa. Her parents divorced, and Benally Baldenegro’s mother had to return to college to become a teacher to help support her and her three brothers. “When my parents divorced, she realized, ‘I only have a high school diploma. I’m only able to teach as a substitute. I need more than this,’” Benally Baldenegro recalls. While Benally Baldenegro was in high school, her mother went to college, and she helped take care of her younger brothers. After the divorce, they went from being fairly well-off to being fairly poor. Benally Baldenegro says education was always important to her. She graduated second in her high school class, and turned down Yale when Arizona State University offered her a full scholarship. “Coming from a single-parent household, I couldn’t turn that down,” she says. After ASU, moved by injustices to the Navajo people, Benally Baldenegro decided to go to law school and was accepted to Harvard. She also received her master’s degree in public policy from Harvard’s John F. Kennedy School of Government. During her studies, Benally Baldenegro did an internship in Canada, working with a native group on health-care issues. She spent another summer in Australia, working for a group doing research on aborigines. “That’s when I decided I wanted to combine my degrees with public policy. So I stayed at Harvard and got a master’s in public policy— and that expanded my world even more. My classmates came from all over the world. It was just this fantastic learning environment,” Benally Baldenegro says. After working for a law firm in Portland,

WHAT’S OBAMA AFRAID OF?

COURTESY OF DIANA URIBE

itting at the table in her in-laws’ dining room in Tucson, Wenona Benally Baldenegro begins like she would any campaign interview, discussing where she grew up and the road that led her to public service. However, this isn’t a typical campaign story— partly because if she wins the race for Arizona’s new Congressional District 1, this Democrat and member of the Navajo Nation would make history as the first Native American woman to serve in Congress. The district is currently represented by Republican Paul Gosar. Like the other districts across the state, it is going through changes that will make this campaign worth watching for Southern Arizonans. The district stretches far north into the Navajo and Hopi nations and the Flagstaff area, but proposed redistricting maps show it spreading farther south, to include Oro Valley and Marana. Sitting across from Benally Baldenegro, 34, is Carolina Cruz, whom she warmly calls tia, or aunt. Cruz is the aunt of Benally Baldenegro’s husband, Salomón Baldenegro Jr. Cruz and Baldenegro’s mother, Cecilia Cruz, grew up in the mining communities of Hayden and Winkelman, where their father, the late Roberto Cruz, helped start Local 886 of the International Union of Mine, Mill and Smelter Workers, which grew into the United Steelworkers Union Local 886. Going to these towns with her aunt and other family members for the campaign forced her aunt to reconnect with the family’s history in mining and unionizing—and to remember how part of the Chicano movement was born on picket lines. The sisters grew up watching their mother and father struggle to provide for their family while fighting for better wages. “It has brought up a lot of emotions that people have put away for 50 years or 60-some years. But going back, the people are so strong, so resilient,” Cruz says, tears rolling down her cheeks as she describes her family’s history. “When the first union came in, my uncles had come (home from World War II), and they came back to a segregated town.” As her uncles made their way home to Arizona, they saw racism’s ugly visage. “So all of that is our history, and that’s why they could no longer (accept half the pay) for the same amount of work,” Cruz says. When the Cruz sisters were little girls, Mexican-American kids could only use the town swimming pool one day a week. “This campaign has brought back memories,” Cruz says. “Yes, some of those memories are hard, but it’s been good to be reminded of our history, and Native American history, too.”

Wenona Benally Baldenegro, with Manny Armenta, the District 12 sub-director of the United Steelworkers Union, at a community dinner in Clifton. She could make history as the first Native American woman to serve in Congress. Ore., Benally Baldenegro decided to return to Arizona. She was interested in teaching law, so she enrolled in the master’s of law program at the UA law school. “I was on track to become a law professor,” she says. But in January, Benally Baldenegro decided to run for office. “One thing I have discovered is when I talk about my story, it’s not just my personal story. My family and community story is very similar to many stories, not only across the district, but across Arizona, across the Southwest, across America,” she says. That’s why her connection to the BaldenegroCruz families is important to her. “It’s two different cultures … but it’s all the same story. Really, it’s who we are as Americans and as Arizonans—not only our two families and how they came to be, but how our two communities came to be. We are all Arizonans.” Last week, U.S. Rep. Raúl Grijalva formally endorsed her. She earlier received endorsements from the United Steelworkers of America and the Progressive Democrats of America, which should give her a boost with fundraising in a tough primary against former Congresswoman Ann Kirkpatrick. “We share stories of success and courage and strength,” Benally Baldenegro says. “I think that’s really what people love about my campaign. It’s not only about who I am and what I want to do, but bringing us together.”

The Arizona Democratic Party bowed out of the Arizona presidential primary last week. Jennifer Johnson, spokeswoman for the Arizona Democratic Party, says the party will instead have caucuses in each of the congressional districts. “That will save the taxpayers some money,” Johnson said. But we couldn’t help but wonder if the Democratic Party’s decision had anything to do with Project White House 2012, the Tucson Weekly’s reality-journalism competition that is helping average citizens get their names on the Feb. 28 presidential-primary ballot. After all, it would be a tremendous blow to President Barack Obama if a dark-horse candidate on the Arizona primary ballot were to defeat him. Johnson denied that the Democrats canceled the primary because they were afraid a Project White House 2012 candidate might beat Obama. “I’m guessing that was not the BARACK driving decision,” said Johnson, who claimed to be unaware of Project White House 2012. Johnson also brushed aside suggestions that the Arizona Democratic Party was seeking to block the ability of Americans to fulfill their childhood dreams of seeking the White House. “We’re not quashing anyone’s dreams,” Johnson said. “If they really want to run, I’m sure there’s a technical process they can go through if they want to participate in the caucus process.” Still, the decision not to have a Democratic primary has big implications for Project White House 2012. Now, any candidate who wants to be on the February primary ballot—and join our reality-journalism competition to win the Tucson Weekly’s endorsement—will need to run as a Republican. By the way, the Arizona Secretary of State’s Office has finalized the nomination form, so if you’re ready to launch your campaign, you can download it at our website. By Jim Nintzel Find early and late-breaking Skinny at The Range, our daily dispatch, at daily. tucsonweekly.com. Jim Nintzel hosts the Political Roundtable every Friday on Arizona Illustrated, airing at 6:30 p.m. on KUAT Channel 6. The program repeats at 12:30 a.m., Saturday. DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2011

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GETOUT OF TOWN! E

very December since 2003, those of us at Weekly World Central have put aside the holiday cookies and brandy-infused eggnog for a bit to ponder how we could make our humble, dusty town just a little bit better. There’s a lot of stuff we could add to Tucson to improve things: More rain. A downtown, nontaxpayer-funded baseball stadium. A Fatburger, perhaps. However, Tucson could improve by getting rid of a lot of stuff, too—hence our annual naughty list, aka our Get Out of Town! issue. Here’s our 2011 list of 21 people, things and groups that we wish would pack up and exit stage left. (Or stage right … it doesn’t matter, as long as they exit.) However, keep in mind the Tucson Weekly has no power to actually kick anyone or anything out of town. Sorry about that. If you think this whole exercise is too negative, we have two pieces of advice: Develop a sense of humor, dammit; and pick up next week’s Local Heroes issue, in which we say nice things about nice people. So there.

Our annual list of people, organizations and things Tucson would be better off without 14 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

BY THE USUAL GANG OF IDIOTS, mailbag@tucsonweekly.com ILLUSTRATIONS BY RAND CARLSON


“Are You Prepared to Die?� Bus-Stop Ads

“Are you prepared to die?� is not a particularly polite question, especially when you’re slapped in the face with it while trying to maneuver through a Tucson traffic snarl. Yet the question was boldly plastered on at least two bus-stop shelters around town in the form of what appeared to be an ad for a life-insurance company. One was on the north side of Fort Lowell Road between Alvernon Way and Columbus Boulevard; the other was on the east side of Swan Road between Grant and Fort Lowell roads. Neither ad remains in place, giving us hope that whoever is responsible for the obnoxious ads has, in fact, gotten out of town—or was perhaps run out of town for killing someone. Both ads were, after all, placed in such a way that they blocked the view of oncoming traffic while you were trying to turn from a side street, making it incredibly easy to be fatally sideswiped by a speeding pickup. Blocking the view of the street was not the only hazard created by these ads. The “Are you prepared to die?� question could also cause motorists to abruptly slam on their brakes, creating a pileup, as they pondered the question: questio on: Would I be happy if I died this instant? Have I fulfilled any of my dreams?? Why do I need life insurance if I don’t even have a wife and kids? Who gives a flying squirrel about life, anyway? —Ryn Gargulinski

Bruce Ash

For the last few years, some of us at Weekly World Central have wondered where Bruce Ash lives, because it just can’t be Tucson. That’s what we told ourselves when the Republican National Committee member, who runs a property-management company, was jabbering on about downtown being dead—no one goes downtown, he said, poking a stick at downtown revitalization. Maybe Ash was deeply confused and happened to be visiting another city. On weekends and some weekdays, it is obvious that downtown Tucson is far from dead: There are concerts at multiple venues, movies at the Screening Room, busy restaurants and a couple of packed playhouses. But that’s the way Ash operates—on lies. Another example of Ash’s technique is his questioning of Gabrielle Giffords’ faith—asking: Is she Jewish enough?—in a letter posted on a Christian blog. Ash, who is also Jewish, was berated by some members of the Tucson

Jewish community, who condemned the idea of questioning someone’s faith, all in the name of politics. But Ash hit an all-time low on the Nov. 21 Buckmaster radio show while doing the Republican-vs.-Democrat deal with political counterpart Paul Eckerstrom: He outright lied about the late Judy Burns and her involvement in the April 26 student takeover of the Tucson Unified School District governing-board meeting. Ash said that not only did Burns plan the takeover; he also said she orchestrated it from the dais in the board room. That didn’t happen, folks. She was not involved; instead, she stood at the dais in support of the students from UNIDOS who were protesting to save the district’s Mexican-American studies classes. Eckerstrom called out Ash on the lie. It’s disgusting that those within Ash’s party don’t bother to call him out on lies like this, too. —Mari Herreras

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Paul Babeu

He burst onto the scene in 2008 when, with only a couple of years of experience in law enforcement, this Joe Arpaio protĂŠgĂŠ ran away with the Pinal County sheriff â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s election, becoming one of the few Republicans to gain g office in what had largely been a Democrat-run county. DemocratSince then, it seems as if Babeu has h burst onto the scene in every place butt his own jurisdiction. The Babeu Express gained full steam in April st 20100 when one of his deputies was apparently shotâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;in Maricopa County, mind C youâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;by susy pected drugp smugglers. sm Sheriff Paul Sh began popping be up anywhere a camera, microca phone or noteph pad was spotted, and declared himself to be in himse of a border charge o (Pinal County county. (P is a good 80 miles from the U.S.-Mexico border, but whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s counting?) Since then, Babeu has made appearances on countless national television programs, and has made dozens of public-speaking engagements across the state. This out-of-his-area exposure has grown exponentially since Oct. 24, when he announced an â&#x20AC;&#x153;exploratory committeeâ&#x20AC;? to look at his chances of winning Arizonaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s District 4 congressional seat. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s only fitting that Babeu chose this district, since hardly any of it will likely be in Pinal County. (Congressional maps have yet to be finalized for the 2012 election.) But the part that is in Pinal County as of now includes the Republican-dominated communities of Gold Canyon and San Tan Valley. What it doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t include, thankfully, is any of Pima County, so thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no reason for Mr. Babeu to make any more trips down here. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Brian J. Pedersen continued on next page

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GET OUT continued from Page 15

Gov. Jan Brewer and the GOP members of the Senate We’ve seen plenty of rotten politics in the state of Arizona, but Gov. Jan Brewer’s effort to kick Colleen Mathis off the Independent Redistricting Commission—with the support of every Republican in the Arizona Senate—might be the most-astonishing abuse of power we’ve ever witnessed. The Independent Redistricting Commission has the job of redrawing the state’s political boundaries, setting the playing field for a decade of politics on both the federal and state levels. If you have competitive districts, you have a chance of defeating particularly loathsome politicians (of which we have no shortage in Arizona). If you have lopsided districts, politicians—no matter how wretched they are—feel free to act with impunity, because they know they are safe at the ballot box as long as they pander to the most-extreme elements of their party so they can win primaries. When Arizona Republicans realized they weren’t going to be able to control the Independent Redistricting Commission, they did the next-best thing: They whipped up a campaign to destroy the reputation of Mathis, a former Republican who had registered as an independent because she could no longer stomach the rightward lurch of the party. That disgraceful campaign reached its lowest point in early November, when Gov. Jan Brewer tried to fire Mathis based on a bunch of trumped-up charges that she had committed “gross misconduct” and “substantial neglect of duty” for supposedly violating the state’s open-meeting laws and violating constitutional requirements on the drawing of maps. Of course, all the plotting by the Republicans regarding the alleged violations of the openmeeting laws was done behind closed doors, as Brewer and GOP lawmakers huddled out of public view to determine how to remove Mathis. As for the charges that Mathis had somehow violated the Arizona Constitution: Well, it turns out the people who broke the law and violated the Arizona Constitution were Brewer and the GOP lawmakers—a point that was hammered home when the Arizona Supreme Court stepped in and told Brewer that she had no

cause to remove Mathis. The justices reinstated Mathis as chairwoman and re-established the rule of law in Arizona. Thank God there’s at least one branch of government left in this state that’s not completely corrupt and rotten. —Jim Nintzel

Bro Tanks

When did it become acceptable for 20-something-year-old guys to wear tank tops? Not just any kind of tank top, mind you, but the homemade, jaggedly cut kind of tank top, often referred to as a “bro tank.” The arm holes are so large that the wearer’s entire chest is exposed, nipples and all. It’s unacceptable and not something to be worn in public. If you didn’t want to wear a shirt, then why did you even bother putting on what looks like an oversize cotton bib? The worst part: The sleeveless atrocities are always worn by guys who think they are supercool—the dudes who use hair gel and work on their tans a lot. Although most bro-tank wearers are found in gyms, a substantial number can be found in more-public places. Undoubtedly, the bro tank is an apparel strategy to showcase muscles, the male equivalent of the push-up bra (another bad fashion choice). We get it, bro: You work out, and you look good. But, please, put on some clothes. Young children do not need to see your nipples while shopping at Safeway. —Janice Biancavilla

Giffords and her aide Ron Barber continue to deal with. But for those who love Tucson, the shootings came during a time when we were already dealing with many divisive issues in Arizona, including the increasing anti-Mexican sentiment that’s exemplified in SB 1070 and HB 2281, the anti-ethnic-studies law targeting Mexican-American studies in the Tucson Unified School District. The day of the shootings, some of us were asking each other and ourselves: “How much more are we supposed to take?” It’s hard to deal with broken hearts—and while they are still mending, it hurts even more to hear the idiocracy calling for Giffords’ resignation, with people complaining they aren’t being represented. Everyone deserves time to heal, especially if they were injured on the job, as Giffords was. The lack of statesmanship from some politicians after Jan. 8 has been stunning. One fine (or is it foul?) example is state Sen. Frank Antenori, who announced his interest in running for Giffords’ seat if she decides not to run again. “The voters need to make a decision, and how do they do that without information? They can’t make an assessment of her ability because her staff have denied access to the media,” he said. Then there was the spectacle of the local p

Complainers Who Say Gabrielle Giffords Should Resign

GOP raffling off a Glock, the same brand of handgun used on Jan. 8. Maybe we haven’t learned anything from that awful day. Or maybe there is a lesson there: We should give the boot to callous politicians such as our dear friend Frank. Find some other city to torture, people. We’ve been through enough. Get. Out. Of. Town. —M.H.

Derechos Humanos (for supporting the Sound Strike)

Derechos Humanos has done essential work for the civil rights of Southern Arizona’s Latino population, but it made a self-destructive misstep by encouraging the Sound Strike to silence the potentially powerful leadership that music and musicians could provide in the wake of SB 1070. Most Sound Strike artists rarely appear in Arizona, anyway, which only makes them look cynical—especially when new releases find them scrambling for loopholes. Anyway, artists need to eat, too. And by facilitating the artists’ boycott of Southern Arizona, Derechos cut off a much-more-leveragable benefit: The empowering sound of music to motivate and mobilize

Many of us in Tucson are still recovering from broken hearts suffered in the aftermath of the Jan. 8 shootings. Most of us don’t have the deep psychological and physical wounds that survivors like Congresswoman Gabrielle

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widespread action. The power of easy-to-sing, instantly memorable and instinctively resonant music is ageless, from “We Shall Overcome” to “Give Peace a Chance” to the union songs of the ’30s and the grave-diggers’ movement in 17th-century England. The canticle known as “Magnificat,” for example, spoke for the disenfranchised in Biblical times, but also empowered the Sandinistas. Imagine it today, with or without a few “bitches” and f-bombs: “Casting down the mighty from their thrones / and lifting up the lowly / He has filled the hungry with good things / and sent the rich away empty.” It’s time for Sound Strike artists to step up and do what really needs to be done to help Arizona—and for Derechos Humanos to send its naïve involvement with the music business outta town. —Linda Ray

Geotagging

If I were a stalker, Foursquare would be the best gift on Earth, but I’m not … so it’s just annoying. Why does your entire social network need to know your whereabouts at all times? Chances are, your “friends” don’t give a shit, and you shouldn’t, either. Thanks to social-media linking, Foursquare updates can pop up on Twitter and Facebook, even if you are not a stalker-square member, therefore clogging up your minifeed with a bunch of URL links preceded by the phrase, “I’m at … (insert a place you don’t care about here).” The worst of it, though, is being with one of these people. Without fail, he or she whips out a phone—which seems to be surgically attached to a hand—when he or she walks into a new establishment. I’ve actually been silenced at times with a, “Hold on; I need to check in.” Call me archaic, but I firmly believe that leisurely using one’s phone while in the presence of friends is incredibly rude. So to all of you badge-earning, mayor-boasting geo-prey out there: Either give it up and keep your phone in your pocket, or get out of town. —Janice Biancavilla

Headlight/ Brights Abusers

“Blinded by the Light” is a bad-enough song, but it’s even worse as a phenomenon that hits Tucson as soon as dusk arrives: The blindness comes from those headlight abusers who drive around with their brights on. Headlight abusers drive every size, shape and make of vehicle. They are especially common in big-wheeled trucks that pull directly behind you, with the brights blazing steadily into your rearview mirror. Brights are meant for safety purposes, such as improving night vision on unlit, winding mountain roads with 900-foot drops, black bears scampering to and fro, and a lack of guardrails. But turning on the brights to piddle-paddle down straight-as-an-arrow Tucson streets is absurd. Make that really absurd. And it’s also unsafe. Motorists suddenly blinded by brights might

veer off the road, or even run head-on into a headlight abuser. Brights also endanger the folks who walk their dogs after dark, especially if their dogs are prone to lunging at large, white, blinding things that rumble down the street. —R.G.

Judgmental Moms

As a caregiver for two autistic boys who are constantly working on their coping, social and communication skills in their natural (and, yes, that sometimes means public) environment, I find myself frequently encountering judgmental mothers. The boys are both almost 10. When they act unruly, it launches them, and me, into a world of pitying glances and clucking tongues. I once encountered a woman while shopping at Bookmans who told me to take the child I was caring for outside, because he was bothering her. Hey, judgmental moms: Your kids may be silent, but that doesn’t mean they are perfect. One of the kids I work with is nonverbal, and he uses loud cries and screams to relay his feelings. Just because we happen to be shopping at Target doesn’t mean he can change the way he communicates. Believe it or not, shushing doesn’t work. So to all you older folks who don’t understand autistic kids because they were in insane asylums when you were growing up: Please keep your mouths shut. Your ignorance doesn’t help me or the child you’re complaining about. Teach your own children compassion by leaving the parent or caregiver alone while he/she is dealing with an already-difficult situation. After taking care of the two autistic boys, I get to go to my own, quiet home at night, which helps me deal with the feelings of embarrassment and frustration. But most mothers with special-needs kids don’t have that escape. So, judgmental moms: If you encounter a child exhibiting socially unacceptable behavior, show some compassion, and just deal with it—or get out of town. —Debbie Hadley

Lazy ShoppingCenter Managers

A recent trip to the Grant/Swan neighborhood in search of sustenance turned into a frustrating voyage full of broken promises, thanks to shopping-center managers who are either unwilling or unable to take down the signs of long-gone tenants. As we drove past Crossroads Festival, on the intersection’s northeast corner, our taste buds kicked in as we saw the sign for Quiznos. But as we pulled in front of the building, we encountered an empty storefront. We also happened to need some info on newhome developments in Tucson, so we figured that the KB Home Studio on the southeast corner would be worth checking out. Although the KB Home sign was still up, the business had been replaced by a Halloween Express. How hard can it be for the people who manage shopping centers to keep signs up to continued on next page DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2011

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GET OUT continued from Page 17 date? Is it just pure laziness, or do they hope that people lured into the complex by the promise of a no-longer-in-existence store or restaurant will end up patronizing adjacent establishments? These bums need to get out of town. We’d recommend hitting Carlota’s Authentic Mexican at Foothills Mall before hitting the road, but even though the sign is still up, that place moved months ago. —B.J.P.

Loud Salvation Army Bell-Ringers

The holidays are hard to miss. There’s the sight of Christmas trees in stores, the smell of pine needles and the taste of fruitcake. But there are also long lines to wait in, crazy shoppers to contend with and too many things to buy. Our senses of sight, smell and taste are almost overwhelmed. But wait: I haven’t mentioned the sounds of the season. Santa’s sleigh bells? No. Bells ringing so angels get their wings? Nope. The earshattering sound of Salvation Army bells ringing at store entrances? Yes. I certainly can’t speak ill of the Salvation Army’s good deeds. The organization offers disaster relief, homeless services, youth camps and an array of other services and programs. But those bell ringers … some ring the bell gently to

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announce their presence. That’s fine. However, others shake their bell fiercely, sending out a shrill, piercing sound. I know you are there. I see your red kettle. Must I hear you at the outer edge of the parking lot? I think not. Pack up your things, loud bell-ringers, and get out of town! —Irene Messina

Modern Streetcar Tracks (for Screwing Up Tucson Events)

I have high hopes for the modern streetcar. Maybe, just maybe, it can be the first step in a comprehensive, modern public-transportation system for the Old Pueblo. It should be a boon to downtown by making it easier for UA students to get to and from the heart of our city. Really, the streetcar will be a good thing, I think. I hope. However, the tracks (metaphorically speaking) are already causing a big problem for Tucson (literally speaking). City officials are telling organizations that sponsor events on Fourth Avenue and Congress Street that from now on, those streets will be unavailable for closure (with the twice-ayear Fourth Avenue Street Fair being the only exception)—and not just during construction of the tracks and stations along the streetcar route. No, folks, the city is saying that Fourth and Congress will be unavailable for events-related closures forever. This means that Fourth Avenue events that close portions of the avenue—like the car shows, for example—will need to move or die. Same goes for The Event put on by the Centurions; the parties held in front of the Fox Tucson Theatre; the Tucson Weekly’s very own Club Crawl® events; and numerous other functions that bring thousands of people to downtown and Fourth Avenue throughout the year. So … in the name of improving downtown and Fourth Avenue, the city and the feds are jeopardizing events that have brought, and would otherwise continue to bring, millions of dollars in revenue to downtown and Fourth Avenue. Here’s hoping that saner heads prevail as this reality sinks in. In the meantime … get out of town, streetcar tracks! —Jimmy Boegle

Non-Tucsonans Who Whine About the City of Tucson

Every morning, out-of-towners drive into our city, clog our streets and deepen our potholes, before retreating back into the mountains as night falls. Yes, I’m talking about you, residents of the Catalina foothills and Casas Adobes—and all of the other people who live outside of the Tucson city limits and gripe about, but work in and enjoy, the city of Tucson. It’s all in a day’s work for more than 100,000 people who live on the outskirts of the city— many with property values that are exponentially higher than that of the average Tucsonan. 18 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

Get out of town! OPPOSING VIEWS Occupy Tucson (for Taking Away Public Spaces)

The nascent Occupy Tucson movement stirred the imaginations of veteran civil rights activists, peace workers, environmentalists, would-be retirees devastated by the loss of their nest eggs, and young folks discovering the universal, irreducible unfairness of unemployment. There were signs everywhere of a new vision—one that reduces banks to serving their customers instead of their shareholders; demands that the excessively rich pay at least their fair share for the society that bestows upon them such unreasonable favor; and insists we be governed by flesh-and-blood people of our choosing rather than powerful corporate interests. To those ends, alas, Occupy protestors have been worse than useless. They have exploited and besmirched potential new leadership and ideas that might have addressed such problems. Meanwhile, they have relentlessly sucked energy and resources from some of our city’s proudest taxpayer-owned assets: the quality of our parks, and the competence of the parks’ maintenance on our behalf, even on budgets slashed to the bone. In times of crisis, both personal and universal, our city parks have unfailingly lightened our load with loveliness and play. Occupyy needs to get off of our lawn. —L.R.

Occupy Tucson Complainers

It hasn’t always been easy for me to support the Occupy movement, and by association, Occupy Tucson. It has sometimes felt as if those involved arrived late to the dance. Another legitimate criticism is that the movement nationally may be doomed to fail because it has no visible strategy: Social movements succeed when they are nonviolent and have a well-organized weell-organized strategy. However, despite my concerns, I am tired of the bitching and moaning from folks who rant that Occupy is taking up public parks or is made up of unemployed whiners or is too topheavy with whites and males in what’s supposed to be a leaderless movement. At Occupy Tucson, I’ve met well-intentioned and smart people who happen to be employed, albeit underemployed. Habeas corpus rights are in jeopardy; corporations are considered people and allowed to influence elections; and the banks still haven’t been held accountable for the crisis that required the government to bail them out—all good reasons to be involved in the Occupy movement. There is a small group of Occupy Tucson folks working on foreclosure issues, which gives me hope. With the right’s assault on ACORN and that group’s absence, something needs to happen locally. Thousands of Tucsonans have faced this crisis alone, while groups in other communities have organized squatter workshops and protests, and formed groups to surround properties to keep law enforcement from issuing evictions—and to keep homes from being sold on the courthouse steps. Those who whine and complain about Occupy Tucson don’t have many answers to the problems facing our city. Well, they know what they can do: Grab a bus ticket, and get out of town. —M.H. The next time you complain about how terrible the roads are in midtown, gripe about the traffic, or cry about Rio Nuevo: Zip it—literally. Change your ZIP code. Tired of crossing rivers during monsoon flash floods because the entire city is a slope of doom that funnels water down main streets? Maybe if you forked over some of that property-tax revenue, and/or agreed to annexation, we could level some streets. Getting road rage because you have to wait an hour in traffic to get from downtown to Grant and Wilmot roads during rush hour? You’re a part of the problem. You could be a part of the solution, but since you’d rather keep your money (a lot of which you make in Tucson) to yourself, keep your complaints out of town, too. —Kellie Mejdrich

People Who Use Automated Carts as Toys

A recent blog post at Discover Magazine’s website outlined the findings of an informal survey regarding the behavior of 500 supermarket shoppers. The results were not pretty. When acquiring a cart at the store entrance, 69 percent dumped any leftover trash into another cart. Only 7 percent of shoppers observed the item limit in the express lane. And only about one in five shoppers returned the cart to the proper depository. Other poor shopping behavior is commonplace at the supermarket—including children and young adults using the automated


carts as a form of entertainment. It’s shocking to see parents unaware of or uninterested in the fact that their kids are playing around with the carts, especially when there are few carts to begin with. The carts are there for people who need them, and the carts should not be used otherwise. One kid’s joy ride can prevent a disabled person from shopping. To the inconsiderate kids and parents: Take a hike out of town! —I.M.

Politicians Who Can’t Gather Signatures Properly

Earlier this year, those of us at Weekly World Central were kinda, sorta looking forward to the chaos that would have been the 2011 mayoral race. It would have featured the always-entertaining Shaun McClusky battling Ron Asta (Hey! I have meat in my pants!) in the Republican primary for the chance to face former major league pitcher Pat Darcy (an independent), lawyer Jonathan Rothschild (a Democrat) and the winner of the Mary DeCamp/Dave Croteau Green Party primary in the general election. Problem is, McClusky, Asta and Darcy proved to be complete political morons by not gathering enough signatures to get on the ballot. That’s Politics 101, folks: You can’t win if you can’t get on the ballot. And these three candidates failed Politics 101 with an F-. Some supporters of these candidates then had the nerve to whine about the local Democrats who successfully challenged invalid signatures. Really. Instead of criticizing the candidates for not getting enough valid signatures—which, if you have something resembling a legitimate campaign, is not that difficult—people criticized the folks who pointed out the invalid signatures. So, who were the real losers (aside from McClusky, Asta and Darcy)? Tucsonans. Thank goodness for Republican write-in candidate Rick Grinnell (Note: That may be the first time those eight words were ever strung together!), Rothschild and DeCamp for offering some semblance of a public discussion about the issues that matter to Tucsonans during the mayoral race (even if that discussion devolved into insane topics such as decreasing trash collection and using vacant storefronts for citizens to swap things they don’t want). However, it was nowhere near the fruitful debate Tucsonans may have gotten from a legitimate four-candidate race. —Jimmy Boegle

Rio Nuevo Board

The history of Tucson’s downtown-revitalization efforts is long and troubled. There’s little argument that too many of the Rio Nuevo dollars the city received were squandered on planning for projects that were never built. But there’s also little argument that downtown is now on the upswing. Thanks to the Rialto and Fox theaters, there are a lot of people out on the town. Thanks to a blossoming club scene, there’s more nightlife downtown than we’ve seen in our lifetime. The dining opportu-

nities are spectacular: Janos is back downtown; 47 Scott is creating innovative cocktails to accompanying fine plates; Maynards has finally found a way to bring the historic train station back to life. And have you tried to get a table at Hub without a reservation on a Friday night? Tucson Electric Power has a mammoth new building downtown. Small galleries like Etherton and Dinnerware, and museums like the Museum of Contemporary Art and the Tucson Museum of Art are presenting astonishing shows. Developers are building student housing, and the modern streetcar will create a new connection between the UA and downtown, allowing the university to set up shop. Festivals like Club Crawl®, the All Souls Procession and Tucson Meet Yourself are bringing people downtown by the thousands. In the worst economic times since the Great Depression, downtown Tucson is a place where people are investing money and having a good time. What has a “reconstituted” Rio Nuevo Board done to help? Well, it’s threatened to sue the city of Tucson for an absurd $47 million. It’s refused to invest any money in the Tucson Convention Center so that we might hold on to the economic engine of the Gem Show—and convention business in general. It’s laid claim to a bunch of land, making it that much more difficult to actually get anything built there. Heck, when a nonprofit group actually managed to get enough money to start planting trees at the Mission Garden, the birthplace of our community, the board threatened to take legal action! In short: The Rio Nuevo board is doing its best to kill any momentum and chill any investment in downtown, while spending what money it has on lawyers and accountants. Nice job, fellas. Here’s our message to the Rio Nuevo board: Get on board, or get out of town. Quit trying to get in the way of getting something done. —J.N.

Robert Shelton First, credit where it’s due: During his five years ears as University of Arizona zona president, Robertt Shelton waged spirited bududgetary battles with flat-Earth Arizona legislators. He didn’t always win, of course, as the university endured funding cuts of some $100 million. Thee former president didn’t create the situation in which the school is ever-more dependent on outside money from often-mysterious sources. Still, he apparently did play

dirty—and put faculty members in a untenable position—when he allegedly arranged a sweetheart deal with a Mormon bishop who had pledged $1.2 million to the philosophy department’s controversial Freedom Center. In exchange for the cash, Shelton reportedly promised the anonymous bishop veto power over whoever was hired with his money. When an atheist was picked, the bishop balked—and he ultimately walked with the cash when Freedom Center director David Schmidtz refused to go along. The donor had “worked out a deal with President Shelton, the details of which I don’t care to talk about,” an irked Schmidtz told the Tucson Weekly back in September. By then, of course, Shelton was already settled into his new gig as executive director of the scandal-ridden Fiesta Bowl in Phoenix. And he didn’t return repeated calls from the Weekly concerning Schmidtz’s allegation. For being so ethically challenged, Robert Shelton should get the heck out of town. —Tim Vanderpool

Tucson Appliance Guy (aka Chris Edwards)

It’s like an online daily newspaper. Except it doesn’t

suck! Visit The Range at daily.tucsonweekly.com

Hokey commercials are a staple of any community. Just ask Jim Click, at least when he’s hawking cars and not representing banks as his more-esoteric alter ego, James H. Click Jr. But Chris Edwards takes corny and cheesy to a new level with his Tucson Appliance Company commercials. Whether he’s dressing up like the Incredible Hulk, Superman, Indiana Jones or a Blues Brother, or just being himself, no one has made the make-both-of-yourhands-into-a-gun-and-point-them-toward-thecamera move more ridiculous than Edwards. If you’ve somehow managed to avoid these 30-second bits of ham sandwich—if ever there was a reason to record shows and skip the commercials, this is it—you can view 77 clips of cable-access-level product at tacappliance.com/ Tac/commercials.aspx. If this routine were limited to commercials and YouTube, commerci we wou wouldn’t need to kick him out of town. But Edwards, bless his Ed effort, this year took ef his h shtick to the giant, new video g boards at Arizona b Stadium, where his S mug m (leaning far back and down, b so as to eliminate his neck, another trademark of his look) screams out to fans prior to each and every kickoff. Nothing ever made us wish more for lowscoring football games than this. —B.J.P

DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2011

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CITYWEEK

DECEMBER 15-21, 2011 OUR TOP PICKS OF WHAT TO DO AND WHERE TO DO IT BY KELLIE MEJDRICH, JANICE BIANCAVILLA AND DEBBIE HADLEY

Grinch-Proof Performance

PICK OF THE WEEK

Old and new will merge this weekend at the Tucson Symphony Orchestra Pops! Holiday Spectacular, which mixes classic holiday songs with contemporary favorites. “It’s really like a TV variety show; it’s got so many different performers in it,” said Terry Marshall, a TSO spokesman. The TSO Pops! Holiday Spectacular will feature the TSO Pops! Orchestra, along with the TSO Carolers, the Tucson Regional Ballet, Mariachi Aztlan de Pueblo High School and—to top it off—Santa Claus. This holiday show goes beyond just Christmas music, Marshall said. “We’ve also got the sounds of Hanukkah in there.” Classics on the bill include “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer,” “O Holy Night,” “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year,” and many others, Marshall said. The Tucson Regional Ballet will perform dances from A Southwest Nutcracker, including “The Chili Peppers,” “The Ocotillo” and “The Tumbleweed.” Mariachi Aztlan de Pueblo High School, which consists entirely of Pueblo Magnet High School students, will perform “La Rondinella” and “Feliz Navidad Medley,” Marshall said. The show will end with the audience invited to sing along with the TSO Carolers, Marshall said. Michael Hall will fly in from Florida to guest-conduct the holiday show for the fifth year in a row. “I was very excited about the prospect to be back in Tucson and work with the orchestra again,” said Hall, who is director of the Southwest Florida Symphony. He said he loves the variety of the show. “We have a lot of special guests, real favorites who have been participating in the concert for a few years now,” Hall said. “There’s fantastic mariachi. And the Tucson Regional Ballet—they’re not only dancing The Nutcracker, but also choreography to another Christmas selection by Nikolai Rimsky-Korsakov.” Both Marshall and Hall agreed that one of the highlights of this year’s show will be a slightly different holiday piece: a special arrangement for bassoon titled “Bassoon It Will Be Christmas.” “It’s kind of a whimsical piece which incorporates Christmas music with wellknown classical pieces, and it’s an opportunity for our bassoon section to show off their Michael Hall talents,” Marshall said. Hall said the piece “really gives a light-hearted new take on some of the very popular holiday songs, mixed in with a few classical pieces, too.”

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Hall said he enjoys working with the TSO audience. “Holiday shows are fun, because you have such a wide range of ages in the audience—it’s really geared toward the whole family.” With audience participation and Santa in the mix, the show “brings not just adults, but kids and families, too, something that makes this show a little different,” Hall said. “There’s a different atmosphere in shows like this than in other shows. It’s very festive, and everybody’s in a good mood.” If you’re having trouble getting into the holiday spirit, you will probably hear or see something that will get you into a yuletide mood before the show is over, Marshall said. “I don’t want to say I am a Grinch, but sometimes, it’s difficult for me to get into the holiday spirit,” Marshall said. “This always does the trick.” The TSO Pops! Holiday Spectacular starts at 7:30 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; and 2 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18, at the Tucson Convention Center Music Hall, 260 S. Church Ave. Tickets are $22 and up. Call 882-8585; visit www.tucsonsymphony.org; or visit the Tucson Symphony Orchestra box office at 2175 N. Sixth Ave. for tickets or more information. Kellie Mejdrich mailbag@tucsonweekly.com

MUSIC Rockin’ Recital Benefit Concert for Emerge! by Allegro School of Music 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18 Holsclaw Hall UA School of Music 1017 N. Olive Road 670-9162; www.allegroschoolofmusic.net

More than 100 students will perform a variety of musical styles on guitar, piano, violin, bass and drums in an effort to raise funds for the Emerge! Center Against Domestic Abuse. Joshua Brown, the director and cofounder of the Allegro School of Music, puts on recitals twice a year, and most of them serve as fundraisers for various charities. His office manager volunteers at Emerge! every week, and to Brown, it just made sense for Allegro to help out the organization. “It’s a shelter where women can stay until there’s a safe environment for them to return to. I thought: Why not do it for Emerge? We took donations through December, with the final day being the day of the recital,” Brown said. “We have big donation boxes at the school, and there’s a donation wish list that we’ve published on our website (click on ‘Newsletter’) so people can drop off items.” When he was a graduate student at the University of Arizona, Brown created Allegro with classmate Jeff McKee in 1999. Students 5 years old and up can learn to play a variety of instruments, including the guitar, violin and drums; voice lessons are available, too. The school has grown steadily, and this fall included some 325 students. According to the school’s website, more than 15,000 lessons are given annually. Admission to the recital is free, and donations of various items will be accepted at the door. —D.H.


Far left: Aaron Neville performs a Christmas show at 7:30 p.m., Friday, Dec. 16, at Fox Tucson Theatre, 17 W. Congress St. $25 to $65. Call 624-1515, or visit foxtucsontheatre.org for information.

Aaron Neville

“Great White” (cropped) by Andrea Peterson

Left: Andrea Peterson’s work will be on display, along with other artists’ creations, at the Holiday Spectacular VII at Zoe Boutique on Saturday, Dec. 17.

SPECIAL EVENTS

ART/SPECIAL EVENTS

FILM

Art for Agriculture

Pornoments!

Break Out the Bad Sweaters!

Tucson Village Farm Benefit Art Show

Holiday Spectacular VII

1 to 4 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17

6 to 9 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17

The Very Merry Holiday Sing-Along Spectacular!

Tucson Village Farm 4210 N. Campbell Ave.

Zoë Boutique 735 N. Fourth Ave.

626-5161; www.tucsonvillagefarm.org

740-1201; www.zoestyle.com

With paintings ranging from $10 to $500, there will be something in everybody’s price range at this Saturday’s benefit art show for the Tucson Village Farm—and most of the proceeds will go to the working urban farm that was designed to educate Tucson youth, said Leza Carter, the founder of the nonprofit farm. The artwork for sale is by traveling artists Andy Holmes and Martine Bedard, founders of Art for People (artforpeople.ca). “Their artwork is all whimsical— bright colors, vibrant, very positive images,” Carter said. “They choose a nonprofit every year to help out, and we were lucky to get them!” The pair traveled through British Columbia along with their two daughters on their bicycles. Their paintings include imagery from their travels. Carter founded the Village Farm in 2010. “Everything we do involves goods,” she said. “We offer agriculture education for kids.” The Tucson Village Farm offers yearround, instructional, hands-on programs for youth of all ages. “We target urban youth from all ethnic and socio-economic backgrounds,” Carter said. Throughout the school year, 150 kids come to the farm each week. “It’s a field-trip-based program. They come through, and we teach them where their food comes from, and how to identity fresh food,” she said. “We teach them the entire seed-to-table cycle.” Along with live music, fresh hors d’oeuvres from the farm, plus drinks will be provided at Saturday’s show. What’s on the menu? “Coconut-curry pumpkin soup, fresh salad rolls and our own popcorn. We have our own field of corn. We just harvested and had the kids pick it off the cob,” Carter said. Admission is free. For purchases, attendees should bring cash or checks. —D.H.

Zoe Boutique, Fourth Avenue’s go-to place for trendy fashion, is hosting its seventh annual Holiday Spectacular. This year, more than 30 artists have submitted non-traditional Christmas ornaments to hang on the boutique tree for sale throughout the night. The ornaments are reflective of each artist’s personal style. While some are traditional, “some are just totally out there,” according to storeowner Lissa Marinaro. She described the variety of ornaments as eclectic, including pieces like small painted canvases, images in glass and even a glorified picture of Snooki. Artist Donovan White took the decorations to a whole new level and coined the term “pornoments” for his artistic decorations. He describes the ornaments as 1970s Playboy-style, with some boobies, but “nothing too raunchy.” “Definitely a sexier side of Christmas, if you will,” said White about his R-rated creations. The Holiday Spectacular actually received its name from White, who was integral in helping create the event. White said he grew up with “the whole works” during the holidays, and wanted to share the same spirit with other Tucsonans. After he grabbed some ugly holiday sweaters and created some Christmas ornaments, the event eventually became a yearly ritual. “It’s an art show with a Christmas undertone,” he said, “a get-together and something fun to take the heat off the normal gallery show. It has a little bit of a pulse to it.” The artists’ work will be featured for one night only, and if you are looking for an off-beat Christmas gift or a special ornament for your tree, attendance is recommended. Most art pieces are $25 or less. —J.B.

Kermit the Frog

7:30 p.m., tonight, Thursday, Dec. 15 Loft Cinema 3233 E. Speedway Blvd. 795-7777; www.loftcinema.com

This Thursday, head to the Loft Cinema to enjoy all of your favorite Christmas songs—and singing along is encouraged! The annual Very Merry Holiday SingAlong Spectacular is meant for all ages and includes cinematic shorts from seasonal favorites for guests to sing-along with. Call it movie-theater caroling. The party will start off with the annual Ugly Sweater Parade, during which guests are invited to show off their most-heinous knit attire on the main stage; the worst-sweater winners will be allowed to share a holiday horror story or a song. Audience members will vote for the funniest or best contestant, and the winner will receive a prize and crown. Then on to the main event! The sing-along will include what Loft program director Jeff Yanc called “triedand-true classics,” as well as new favorites. Featured songs come from movies such as White Christmas, It’s a Wonderful Life and How the Grinch Stole Christmas! and TV shows such as The Muppet Show. Featured artists during the 90-minute singing compilation include Frank Sinatra, Judy Garland, Bing Crosby and even Ozzy Osbourne. All clips will be subtitled. Yanc said the sing-along is a popular event that draws a large crowd every year. Typically, he said, half or more of the 500-seat theater is filled. Free candy canes will be up for grabs, and both leaded and unleaded eggnog will be served at the concession stand alongside the normal movietheater treats. Guests who bring an unwrapped toy for donation to Casa de los Niños will receive half off of their admission. Regular admission is $8, or $6 for Loft members. —J.B.

Submissions CityWeek includes events selected by Kellie Mejdrich, Janice Biancavilla and Debbie Hadley and is accurate as of press time. Tucson Weekly recommends calling event organizers to check for last-minute changes in location, time, price, etc. To have material considered, please send complete information by Monday at noon 11 days prior to publication. Send to: Tucson Weekly, P.O. Box 27087, Tucson, AZ 85726, or fax information to 792-2096, or e-mail us at listings@tucsonweekly.com. DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2011

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SPECIAL EVENTS

TQ&A

EVENTS THIS WEEK

Ross Zimmerman

DOWNTOWN PARADE OF LIGHTS Colorfully lit entries and floats vie for cash awards based on beauty, originality, creativity in the use of lights, craftsmanship, effective use of colors and materials, in the 17th Annual Parade of Lights from 6:30 to 8 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; free. The parade has a new route: Beginning at 17th Street and Stone Avenue, it turns right on Ochoa Street and ends at the southwest corner of Armory Park. Bring a blanket or chair; bleacher seating is available, but limited at Armory Park, 221 S. Sixth Ave.

Ross Zimmerman says the idea for Beyond Tucson: Commemorate, Celebrate, Commit came up when he was talking to Ron Barber about the looming anniversary of the Jan. 8 shootings. There will be many somber ceremonies to honor the victims—including Zimmerman’s son Gabe, who was killed, and Barber, who was severely wounded. However, Beyond Tucson, on Saturday, Jan. 7, is intended to connect people through exercise, fun and the enjoyment of the outdoors, and for people to celebrate the strength, resilience and beauty of Tucson. The Zimmerman family began working on the Tucson Trails Tribute Fund to honor the victims, and the first TTT event is Beyond Tucson. For more information, go to www. beyond-tucson.org, or search for it on Facebook.

HOLIDAY EVENTS AT LOEWS VENTANA CANYON Loews Ventana Canyon Resort. 7000 N. Resort Drive. 299-2020. The 12 Days of Christmas concludes with a live holiday performance from 6:15 to 7 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 15; free, food and refreshments are available for purchase. The Jewish Community Center Childrens’ Choir performs traditional Hanukkah songs, and traditional treats are served, from 5:30 to 6:30 p.m., Wednesday, Dec. 21; free.

Mari Herreras, mherreras@tucsonweekly.com

How did the Tucson Trails Tribute start? After the shootings, one of the people who came to town to help with things was Steve Golden, the cousin of my wife, Pam Golden, Gabe’s stepmother. He works for the National Park Service’s rivers and trails programs. Their stock in trade is working with communities to develop things in cooperation with the Park Service to get people outdoors and active. He applied those skills to pull together a large selection of entities in town to commemorate Gabe and others. Who are the entities working together? He was able to bring together the city and county, the Udall Foundation, the Sonoran Institute, Child and Family Resources and Tucson Medical Center. I was flabbergasted by the cross-section he got involved. Pam and Gabe’s mom, Emily, were all in the loop on that, and then Pam and I got involved in early meetings to focus on the main idea. Gabe and I had worked together on a map for his boss’ website on points of interest. Something we put together was the fact that Congressional District 8 was known as one of the, if not the, most biodiverse regions in the United States. How does that relate to the Tucson Trails Tribute? You can make the argument that Tucson has more incred22 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

ible trail systems in the metropolitan area than any city in the United States. Our wonderful mountain ranges are nationally known among climbers. Outside magazine said it was the best for roadbiking. But the idea is that we should make use of our wonderful public lands and get people out and mentally engaged to improve their physical and mental health. … We quickly came to the idea to focus on outreach programs that use these public lands to get people, especially young people, out in nature, and physical and mentally healthy. What’s one way to get folks out more? One idea is the development of a trail system. That is certainly one of our longerrange goals, but our focus right now is on the short term: getting people out. We hired a staff person, Michelle Crow. … She worked as Gabe’s counterpart in Raúl (Grijalva’s) office. They were good friends and colleagues. What about the idea for Beyond Tucson? Ron Barber assembled a meeting to point out that the anniversary of the shootings is approaching fast, and to figure out how we would commemorate the shootings. It occurred to me that on Saturday, Jan. 7, before the anniversary, would be a good day to stage something. Our goal would be to get as many

people (as possible) out and about that day doing something active and worthwhile that commemorates our loss in some way that is positive. Sunday, Jan. 8, is going to be more somber and about loss. The concept for Beyond Tucson quickly evolved into something large-scale. … We have more than 100 community partners now. Tucson Trails Tribute sponsored an event at Reid Park, and other groups have organized dozens of other things across the region. Are you surprised that there’s a strong interest in helping with Beyond Tucson? I’d say I’ve been pleased and encouraged. I’ve known for months that there are a lot of good people in Tucson who wanted to help. At Gabe’s private funeral service, we had 650 people, and we had to work to keep it at that. Keep in mind that thousands of people were touched by this. If you want to be involved, is the Beyond website the best place to go? Yes. If you go to the website, you’ll already see an array of events. If you see something you want to go to, please register so the organizer has an idea of how many people are going to turn up. Also, if there are people who want to stage something that we have not spoken to yet, there is a section on the website they can access.

MERCADO HOLIDAY BAZAAR Mercado San Agustín. 100 S. Avenida del Convento. 461-1110, ext. 8. Artisan foods, children’s clothing and toys, jewelry, specialty gifts and traditional holiday foods like tamales, buñuelos and champurrado are for sale by local artisans and small businesses from 11 a.m. to 6 p.m., Friday, Dec. 16, through Sunday, Dec. 18; free admission. A life-size gingerbread house and photo ops with Santa highlight activities for kids. Visit mercadoholidaybazaar.wordpress.com for more info. THAI FOOD BUFFET FUNDRAISER Tucson Buddhist Meditation Center. 1133 S. Swan Road. 745-4624. Pad Thai, egg rolls, chicken curry, vegetarian curry, desserts and more are served from 5 to 7 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; $10, free child younger than 10. Proceeds help underwrite free classes at the center. TUCSON VILLAGE FARM BENEFIT SHOW Tucson Village Farm. 4210 N. Campbell Ave. 6265161. Art by Art for People and farm-fresh hors d’oeuvres are sold to benefit Tucson Village Farm programs from 1 to 4 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; free admission. Raffle tickets are sold for a trip to South Africa. Call or visit tucsonvillagefarm.com for more information. ZOO LIGHTS Reid Park Zoo. 1030 S. Randolph Way. 881-4753. Jingle bells, falling snow and Santa are featured among the twinkling lights from 6 to 8 p.m., Thursday through Sunday, through Friday, Dec. 23; $5, $4 member, $3 age 2 through 14, free younger child. Visit tucsonzoo. org for more information.

UPCOMING DID JEWISH PIONEERS EAT CHINESE FOOD ON CHRISTMAS DAY? Tucson Masonic Lodge No. 4. 3590 N. Country Club Road. 323-2821. The Jewish History Museum hosts a traditional Chinese dinner at 5:30 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 25; $20. RSVP to 670-9073.

BULLETIN BOARD EVENTS THIS WEEK BE A SANTA TO A SENIOR A program to provide gifts and companionship to seniors who otherwise might have neither continues through Monday, Dec. 19. Donors pick up an ornament with a senior’s name and wish list, then return the ornament with items from the list. Volunteers wrap and deliver the gifts. Locations and details are at beasantatoasenior.com. COFFEE KLATCH BOOK SALE Kirk-Bear Canyon Library. 8959 E. Tanque Verde Road. 792-5021. A sale of coffee-table books takes place, and refreshments are served, from 2 to 4 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; free. CONSIDERING DIVORCE Murphy-Wilmot Branch, Tucson-Pima Public Library. 530 N. Wilmot Road. 594-5420. Representatives of the Family Center of the Conciliation Court and the family law section of the Pima County Bar Association offer information about the emotional and legal aspects of divorce from 6 to 7 p.m., the third Wednesday of every month. Free. Call 740-5590 for more information. GIFT-WRAPPING BENEFIT La Encantada. 2905 E. Skyline Drive. 299-3566. The Leukemia and Lymphoma Society benefits from dona-

tions to a holiday gift-wrapping service on the upper level of La Encantada. Hours are 3 to 8 p.m., Friday, Dec. 16; noon to 8 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; 11 a.m. to 7 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18; and Monday through Friday, Dec. 19 through 23. Donations of wrapping supplies are welcomed. Email shannon.gaines@lls.org. HANDMAKER HOLIDAY HAPPENING Handmaker Jewish Services. 2221 N. Rosemont Ave. 322-7035. A multicultural party celebrates winter holiday traditions from around the world, including Hanukkah, Christmas and Kwanzaa, with harp music, holiday treats, cookie-decorating and holiday card-making, at 2:30 p.m., Tuesday, Dec. 20; free. HOLIDAY SHOW AT MADARAS GALLERY Madaras Gallery. 3001 E. Skyline Road, Suite 101. 615-3001. Snow scenes and holiday gifts are featured from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m., Monday through Saturday; and from 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Sunday, through Saturday, Dec. 31. Free. Visit madaras.com for more information. HOW TO GET BENEFITS YOU’RE QUALIFIED FOR Ellie Towne Flowing Wells Community Center. 1660 W. Ruthrauff Road. 887-9786. One-on-one consultation with an economic resource specialist provides direction and access to available benefits, from 10 a.m. to 12:30 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 15; free. Call 903-3912 to schedule an appointment. SOCRATES CAFÉ Metropolitan Grill. 7892 N. Oracle Road. 531-1212. A group discusses philosophical questions old and new at 6:30 p.m., the first and third Monday of every month; free. Call 575-1743 for more information. SOCRATES SATURDAY FORUM Ward 6 City Council Office. 3202 E. First St. 7914601. All are welcome to join a philosophical discussion at 9 a.m., the first and third Saturday of every month; free. Email lanamorgan1@yahoo.com for more info. SOUTHERN ARIZONA ARTS GUILD Local artists are invited to participate in meetings at 8:30 a.m., the first and third Saturday of every month; $13, $10 member. Meetings on the third Saturday include a casual critique session. Visit southernazartsguild.org for more information. TOUR THE TEMPLE OF MUSIC AND ART Temple of Music and Art. 330 S. Scott Ave. 884-4875. Arizona Theatre Company offers a backstage, behindthe-scenes and historic tour of the Temple of Music and Art at 11:30 a.m., the first and third Saturday of every month, through March 17, except Jan. 1; free. Call 884-8210, ext. 8610, for tour reservations or more information. WORD WEAVERS Dry River Collective. 740 N. Main Ave. 882-2170. A women’s writing circle meets from 1 to 3 p.m., every Friday, except Dec. 23, in Kaitlin’s Creative Cottage in the courtyard; $5. Bring writing tools; tea, cookies and interesting writing prompts are provided. Call 622-6161 for more information.

OUT OF TOWN CAREGIVER SUPPORT GROUP Joyner-Green Valley Branch, Tucson-Pima Public Library. 601 N. La Cañada Drive. Green Valley. 594-5295. Grandparents, and adoptive and other kinship caregivers, meet for information and mutual support at 10:30 a.m., the third Friday of every month; free. Lunch is provided. Call 323-4476, ext. 109, for information. DEMOCRATIC CLUB OF THE SANTA RITA AREA Green Valley Democratic Headquarters. 260 W. Continental Road. Green Valley. 838-0590. The club discusses current events every Wednesday, from 11 a.m. to 12:30 p.m.; free. All are welcome. Email acalkins10@aol.com, or visit gvdemocrats.org. EVENTS AT RINCON VALLEY FARMERS’ AND ARTISANS’ MARKET Rincon Valley Farmers and Artisans Market. 12500 E. Old Spanish Trail. Vail. 591-2276. Hours are 9 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday. Dec. 17: Pet day and community sale behind the barn. Closed Dec. 24 and 31. Visit rvfm. org for more information about upcoming events; and rinconinstitute.org for more information about the market’s sponsors. TRUNK SHOWS AT WESTERN NATIONAL PARKS BOOKSTORE Western National Parks Association Bookstore. 12880 N. Vistoso Village Drive. Oro Valley. 622-6014. Zuni fetishes are for sale from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17. Huichol art, including beaded carvings, yarn paintings, masks and gourd bowls, are exhibited for sale from Monday, Dec. 19, through Thursday, Jan. 5. Hours are 9:30 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Friday; and 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday; free. Reservations are not required.


ANNOUNCEMENTS BEAGLE RESCUE Several beagle-adoption events and play dates are scheduled throughout the month. Visit soazbeaglerescue.com for the schedule and to learn more about Southern Arizona Beagle Rescue. BRIDGE CLUB Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 229-5300. Adults play bridge from 1 to 4 p.m., every Wednesday. Call for more information. CALL FOR VOLUNTEERS: TUCSON CLEAN AND BEAUTIFUL Community groups, businesses, religious groups, neighborhood associations and ad hoc groups of five or more volunteers are needed to adopt parks, streets, washes and other public areas on an ongoing basis. Call 7913109, or visit tucsoncleanandbeautiful.org for more information. CHESS CLUB Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 2295300. All serious chess players are invited from 1 to 5 p.m., every Friday. Call for more information. COATS FOR CUBS Donations of real fur apparel, in any condition, can provide bedding and comfort to orphaned and injured wildlife. Buffalo Exchange has donated 6,331 used furs since 2006, and will take donations through Earth Day, Sunday, April 22. Visit buffaloexchange.com for a complete list of U.S. locations. THE COFFEE PARTY Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 2295300. Friendly discussions of current events take place from 1 to 3 p.m., every Tuesday. Call 878-0256. COMMUNITY DRUM CIRCLE Himmel Park. 1000 N. Tucson Blvd. 791-3276. A community drum circle takes place from 3:30 to 6 p.m., every Sunday. Free. Call 743-4901, or email cactuscarrie10@gmail.com for more information. DESERT CRONES Fellowship Square Villa III. 210 N. Maguire Ave. 8865537. Women older than 50 meet from 1 to 3 p.m., every Thursday except holidays, to enjoy companionship and creativity. Call 409-3357, or email hobbitmagick@ hotmail.com for more information. DESERT SINGLES AND NETWORK SINGLES Desert Singles and Network Singles meet from 5 to 7 p.m., every Friday, at a different location. Free. Call 219-9985, or visit tucsondesertsingles.org for locations and more information. ELDER CIRCLES: THE WISDOM JOURNEY Elders hear presentations and share stories each month on one of four topics intended to encourage pro-active aging: life review; life repair; legacy; and mentoring; free. The first Tuesday of every month, at 10:30 a.m.: The Fountains at La Cholla, 2001 W. Rudasill Road. The third Wednesday of every month, at 10:30 a.m.: St. Paul’s United Methodist Church, 8051 E. Broadway Blvd. The third Wednesday every month, at 3:15 p.m.: Manor at Midvale, 6250 S. Commerce Court. The second Friday of every month, at 10 a.m.: St. Francis in the Foothills, 4625 E. River Road. Call 298-6542, or email deljonesaz@cox.net for more information. FARMERS’ MARKETS Alan Ward Downtown Mercado: south lawn of the Main Library, 101 N. Stone Ave., 8 a.m. to 2 p.m., Wednesday, October through May; 8 a.m. to 1 p.m., Wednesday, June through September (339-4008).

Arivaca Farmers’ Market: 16800 Arivaca Road, Arivaca, 9 a.m. to noon, Saturday. Bisbee Farmers’ Market: Vista Park in the Warren section, 8 a.m. to noon, Saturday (520-227-5060). Community Food Bank: 3003 S. Country Club Road, 8 a.m. to noon, Tuesday (6220525). Corona de Tucson Farmers’ Market: 15921 S. Houghton Road, Vail, 8 a.m. to noon, Friday (8701106). Douglas Farmers’ Market: Raul Castro Park, between D and E avenues, downtown Douglas, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Sunday (520-805-5938 or 520-805-0086). El Presidio Plaza Park Mercado: 115 N. Church Ave., 10 a.m. to 3 p.m., Friday (339-4008). El Pueblo Farmers’ Market: El Pueblo Neighborhood Center parking lot, SW corner of Irvington Road and Sixth Avenue, 8 to 11 a.m., Saturday (882-3304). Elgin Farmers’ Market: Kief-Joshua Vineyards, 370 Elgin Road, Elgin, 11 a.m. to 3 p.m., Sunday, May through October (520455-5582). The Farmers’ Markets at La Posada Green Valley: 665 S. Park Centre Ave., Green Valley, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Monday (603-8116). Farmers’ Market at Voyager RV Resort: 8701 S. Kolb Road, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Thursday (603-8116). Friday Farmers’ Market at Broadway Village: 2926 E. Broadway Blvd., 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Friday (603-8116). Green Things: 3235 E. Allen Road, 9 a.m. to 2 p.m., Sunday (299-9471). Green Valley Village Farmers’ Market: 101 S. La Cañada Drive, Green Valley, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Wednesday (4903315). Marana Farmers Market: 13395 N. Marana Main Street, Marana, 3 to 6 p.m., Tuesday (882-3313). Metal Arts Village Saturday Morning Market: 3230 N. Dodge Blvd., 9 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday (795-1770). Oracle Farmers’ Market: 2805 N. Triangle L Ranch Road, 9 a.m. to noon, Saturday (896-2123). Oro Valley Farmers’ Market: Town Hall at the corner of La Cañada Drive and Naranja Road, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday (8822157). Plaza Palomino: 2970 N. Swan Road, winter: 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday; summer: 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday (plazapalomino.com). Rincon Valley Farmers’ Market: 12500 E. Old Spanish Trail, winter: 9 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday; summer: 8 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday (591-2276). St. David Farmers’ Market: St. David High School, 70 E. Patton St., St. David, 9 a.m. to noon, Saturday, May through October (520-221-1074). St. Philip’s Plaza Saturday Farmers’ Market: St. Philip’s Plaza, southeast corner of River Road and Campbell Avenue, 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday (603-8116). Santa Cruz River Farmers’ Market: Mercado San Agustín, 100 S. Avenida del Convento, 4 to 7 p.m., Thursday (622-0525). San Manuel Farmers’ Market: 801 McNab Parkway, 8 a.m. to noon, Saturday (520-212-2337). Sierra Vista Farmers’ Market: corner of Carmichael Avenue and Willcox Drive, 11 a.m. to 3 p.m., Thursday (520-378-2973). Sunsites Farmers’ Market: Shadow Mountain Golf Course, 1105 Irene St., Sunsites, 8 a.m. to noon, Saturday (520826-1250). Tucson Farmers’ Market: St. Philip’s Plaza, southeast corner of River Road and Campbell Avenue, winter: 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Sunday; summer: 8 a.m. to noon, Sunday (882-2157). Tucson Farmers’ Market at Jesse Owens Park: Jesse Owens Park, 400 S. Sarnoff Drive, winter: 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Friday; summer: 8 a.m. to noon, Friday (918-9811). Tucson Farmers’ Market at Maynards: Maynards Market and Kitchen, 400 N. Toole Ave., winter: 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday; summer: 8 a.m. to noon, Saturday (545-0577). Tucson’s Green Art and Farmers’ Market: 8995 E. Tanque Verde Road, 8 a.m. to 1 p.m., Saturday (982-2645). Ventana Plaza’s Farmers’ Market: 5455 N. Kolb Road, 3 to 7 p.m., Tuesday (603-8116). GAM-ANON MEETING University of Arizona Medical Center. 1501 N. Campbell Ave. A support group for families and friends of compulsive gamblers meets from 7 to 8 p.m., every Monday; free. Call 390-9142 for more information. ITALIAN CONVERSATION Beyond Bread. 3026 N. Campbell Ave. 322-9965. All skill levels practice from 4:30 to 6:30 p.m., every Tuesday; free. Call 624-9145 for more information.

teers are also needed as interpreters. Training takes place in January. Call 622-2801, ext. 127, or email rcamacho@piodecimocenter.org for more information.

LET’S SPEAK SPANISH Himmel Branch, Pima County Public Library. 1035 N. Treat Ave. 594-5305. A language and logistics professor leads practice from 11 a.m. to 12:30 p.m., every Wednesday except holidays; free.

TUCSON SINGLETARIANS A social club for singles age 50 and older meets from 5 to 7 p.m., each Wednesday on the westside, and Thursday on the eastside, at locations that change each month. Free; no-host food and beverages. Call 3269174, or visit tucsonsingletarians.tripod.com for more information about the clubs many other activities.

MAHJONG Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 229-5300. Play Mahjong from 1 to 3:30 p.m., each Saturday; free. Call for more information. NOOK EREADER CLASSES Barnes and Noble. 5130 E. Broadway Blvd. 512-1166. Classes are held from 7 to 8 p.m., the first Tuesday of every month. An all-new Nook class (formerly the Nook eInk class) is held from 7 to 8 p.m., the third Tuesday of every month. All the classes are free. PIMA COUNCIL ON AGING INFORMATION AND ASSISTANCE Pima Council on Aging offers free, one-on-one confidential information and referral sessions at many locations throughout the city. For a complete list, visit pcoa.org. From 10 a.m. to noon, the second Tuesday of every month: Sahuarita Branch Library, 725 W. Via Rancho, Sahuarita. From 10 a.m. to noon, the second and fourth Wednesday of every month: Ellie Towne/ Flowing Wells Community Center, 1660 W. Ruthrauff Road. From 10:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m., the second and last Wednesday of every month: Quincie Douglas Senior Center, 1575 E. 36th St. From 10 a.m. to noon, the third and fourth Wednesday of every month: Freedom Park Recreation Center, 5000 E. 29th St. From 9:30 to 10:30 a.m., the third and fourth Thursday of every month: Clements Center, 8155 E. Poinciana Drive. POZ CAFÉ AND SOCIAL St. Francis in the Foothills. 4625 E. River Road. 299-9063. Poz Café provides people living with HIV a nutritious lunch and an opportunity to socialize from 11:30 a.m. to 1:30 p.m., the third Thursday of each month. The event includes games and shopping at the Poz Marketplace, a table stocked with donated toiletries and personal-care items. Reservations are required. Call 299-6647 to RSVP or request transportation. The monthly Poz Social includes a light lunch and refreshments; an opportunity to socialize; and an array of arts and crafts, new movies and board games. The social is held at a convenient central location from noon to 3 p.m., the first Tuesday of every month. Call 299-6647. PUERTAS ABIERTAS Wingspan’s Latin social group, Puertas Abiertas, holds monthly events and special events throughout the year. A Café Chat at Revolutionary Grounds, 606 N. Fourth Ave., offers safe and friendly conversation at 7 p.m., the third Friday of every month. The group goes bowling at Santa Cruz Lanes, 3665 S. 16th Ave., at 8 p.m., the last Thursday of every month. Email ojimenez@ wingspan.org, or call 624-1779, ext. 124, for more information. SCRABBLE CLUB Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 2295300. Play Scrabble from 1 to 5 p.m., each Monday. Call for more information. SINGLES 50+ LUNCH GROUP Thunder Canyon Brewery. 7401 N. La Cholla Blvd. 7972652. A group meets for conversation and no-host lunch at noon, Sunday. Call 797-9873 for more information. TAX VOLUNTEERS NEEDED Pio Decimo Center and the IRS seek volunteers to provide four to five hours a week of free tax preparation services to low-to-moderate-income residents of Green Valley and the Tucson metropolitan area. Volunteers don’t need prior experience. Spanish-speaking volun-

REGULAR TASTING HOURS

Wednesday and Friday from 4PM-7PM

URBAN YARNS Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. Knitters and crocheters gather informally from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m., each Friday, to work on their own projects, review the library’s fiber-themed books and find inspiration for new projects; free. No instruction is provided. Call 791-4010 for more information.

BUSINESS & FINANCE EVENTS THIS WEEK CAREER COUNSELING Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. A job counselor from Career Services Unlimited provides free, one-on-one career counseling from 9 a.m. to noon, Thursday, Dec. 15; and from noon to 3 p.m., Monday, Dec. 19; free. No reservations are necessary; sessions are limited to 30 minutes. HOLIDAY MIXER AND HIGH JINX Lodge on the Desert. 306 N. Alvernon Way. 320-2000. A holiday networking mixer for Tucson’s advertising and public-relations community takes place from 5 to 7 p.m., Tuesday, Dec. 20. The ticket price includes live entertainment, appetizers and a first beverage from the cash bar. Ticket prices vary; visit aaftucson.com to register and for more information. Participating organizations are the American Advertising Federation Tucson, Ad2 Tucson, the Public Relations Society of America Southern Arizona Chapter and the Tucson American Marketing Association. PROPOSAL-WRITING BASICS WORKSHOP Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. How to write a proposal to a private foundation or corporate funder is the topic of a workshop from 9:30 to 11:45 a.m., Tuesday, Dec. 20; free. YWORKS EMPLOYMENT TRAINING AND DEVELOPMENT PROGRAM FOR WOMEN YWCA Frances McClelland Leadership Center. 525 N. Bonita Ave. 884-7810. Employment-training and development workshops for women who are unemployed, underemployed or transitioning in the workforce take place from 8 a.m. to 3 p.m., the second and third Tuesday of each month. Computer-skills help is available from noon to 5 p.m., the second and third Wednesday each month. $25 per workshop. Scholarships and internships are available. Call 884-7810, ext. 102, to register or for more information.

ANNOUNCEMENTS DROP-IN JOB HELP Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. A computer instructor provides one-on-one job help, including resume-writing; choosing a career; and updating interviewing, networking and job-search skills, from noon to 3 p.m., each Monday; and from 9 a.m.

CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE

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TuCsONWEEKLY

23


Your Local Outdoor Specialists

GLBT CHAMBER OF COMMERCE Manning House. 450 W. Paseo Redondo. 770-0714. Any member of the GLBT community who is engaged in business or works with businesses is invited to a networking breakfast from 7:30 to 9 a.m., the third Thursday every month; $30, $25 member, $5 less if a reservation is made by the Monday prior. Call or visit tucsonglbtchamber.org for reservations or more info.

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:LQWHU6ROVWLFH Saturday, December 17 -- 1:00 pm - 4:00 pm Celebrate with leaf weaving, â&#x20AC;&#x153;snowâ&#x20AC;?, drumming, snowďŹ&#x201A;ake making, a puppet show and much more!

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 23 to noon, each Thursday, in the second-floor Catalina Room; free. Walk-ins are welcome. Call 791-4010, or email askalibrarian@pima.gov to register or for more information.

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JOB-SEEKERSâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; GATHERING Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 2295300. Former executive recruiter Beth Cole facilitates a gathering for adult job-seekers from 3 to 4 p.m., every Friday; free. Call for more information. SCORE BUSINESS COUNSELING Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 2295300. Experienced executives give individualized advice about starting or building a business, from 3 to 5 p.m., every Tuesday; and from 9 a.m. to noon, every Saturday, except Dec. 24 and 31; free. Call for an appointment.

FILM EVENTS THIS WEEK FOX TUCSON THEATRE FILM Fox Tucson Theatre. 17 W. Congress St. 624-1515. Tickets are $7, $5 student, senior or active duty military. Visit foxtucsontheatre.org for tickets and a complete schedule of events. Tuesday, Dec. 20, at 2 and 7 p.m.: Polar Express. Friday, Dec. 23, at 2 and 7 p.m.: Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a Wonderful Life. HOLIDAY MOVIE Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 2295300. A Christmas Story is presented outdoors from 6 to 9 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; free. Food and beverages are available for purchase. LOFT CINEMA SPECIAL EVENTS Loft Cinema. 3233 E. Speedway Blvd. 795-7777. Thursday, Dec. 15: The Very Merry Holiday Sing-Along Spectacular, presented by Bookmans, including a badsweater parade and a holiday-storytelling contest; $8, $6 member. Saturday, Dec. 17, at 10 a.m.: A Christmas Story; $8. Tuesday, Dec. 20, at 7 p.m.: Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, a film festival including vintage cartoons, 1950s shorts like Howdy Doodyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Christmas, and vintage â&#x20AC;&#x153;greetings from theatre managementâ&#x20AC;? ads; $8, $6 member and child younger than 12. Wednesday, Dec. 21: Leningrad Cowboys Go America; free. Friday through Sunday, Dec. 23 through 25, at noon and 10 p.m.: The Nightmare Before Christmas; $6, $5 member. Unless otherwise noted, show time is 7:30 p.m., and tickets are $5 to $9. Visit loftcinema.com for a complete list of all shows and special events. THE ROCKY HORROR SHOW Loft Cinema. 3233 E. Speedway Blvd. 795-7777. The Rocky Horror Picture Show screens at midnight on the third Saturday of every month with Heavy Petting as the shadow cast; $6, $5 member. The film deals with mature subject matter and is not recommended for the easily offended. No one under 17 is admitted; ID required.

ANNOUNCEMENTS CALL FOR FILMMAKERS The Loft Cinema and Susan G. Komen for the Cure seek submissions of 30-second films for a competition with a $500 prize and an opportunity to air on local television. Films must portray one of three messages: early detection is the best protection; know whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s normal for you; 75 percent of what Komen raises stays in Southern Arizona. The deadline for submissions is Tuesday, Jan. 3; submission guidelines are at komensaz.org

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GARDENING EVENTS THIS WEEK BUTTERFLY WALK Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 3269686, ext. 10. A 45-minute tour identifies butterflies common to urban Tucson, and explores the plants and

gardening practices that attract butterflies to the home garden, at 11 a.m., the third Thursday of every month; free with admission. Hours are 8:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m., daily; $8, $4 child age 4 to 12, free younger child or member. Call or visit tucsonbotanical.org for more information. SPECIAL CLASSES AT TUCSON BOTANICAL GARDENS Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 3269686, ext. 10. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Owls: Rulers of the Night Skiesâ&#x20AC;? is presented from 6 to 8 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 15; $20, $15 member. Mary Warren leads a photography workshop with behind-the-scenes access to the tropical greenhouse from 8 to 9:30 a.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; $20, $15 member. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Edible Plants of the Sonoran Desertâ&#x20AC;? explores how indigenous groups have used plants for food, fiber and healing, from noon to 3 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; $32, $25 member. Session leaders share recipes and samples. Visit tucsonbotanical.org to register or for more information. TUCSON ORGANIC GARDENERS St. Markâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Presbyterian Church. 3809 E. Third St. 3251001. Tucson Organic Gardeners have an informational meeting at 7 p.m., the third Tuesday of every month, through April 17. Free literature, refreshments and a mini-market are available. All are welcome. Call 6709158 or visit tucsonorganicgardeners.org for info.

ANNOUNCEMENTS EXPLORING TUCSON BOTANICAL GARDENS Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 3269686, ext. 10. Plant trivia, history of the gardens and introductions to native flora are featured on a guided tour at 10 a.m., every Friday, through May 25; $8, $4 age 4 to 12, free younger child or member, includes admission to the gardens. Call or visit tucsonbotanical. org for more information. ORGANIC GARDENERS COMPOSTING EXHIBIT Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 326-9686, ext. 10. Tucson Organic Gardeners members answer questions in the composting-demonstration area from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m., every Saturday, through May 26; $8, $4 age 4 to 12, free younger child or member, includes admission to the gardens. Call or visit tucsonbotanical.org for more information.

HEALTH EVENTS THIS WEEK CHANGE YOUR LIFESTYLE: SAVE YOUR HEART Tucson Jewish Community Center. 3800 E. River Road. 299-3000, ext. 106. A free presentation by the Foundation for Cardiovascular Health takes place from 1:30 to 3 p.m., Wednesday, Dec. 21. Learn how blockages are formed in coronary arteries and how coronary artery disease can be prevented and reversed. The presentation is repeated at 1:30 p.m, Wednesday, Dec. 28, at Northwest YWCA (7770 N. Shannon Road). Call 797-2281 for information.

OUT OF TOWN STROKE UPDATE Canoa Hills Social Center. 3660 S. Camino del Sol. Green Valley. 625-6200. Health professional Leslie Ritter presents â&#x20AC;&#x153;Stroke Update: The Power of Community,â&#x20AC;? at 10 a.m., Thursday, Dec. 15; free. Refreshments are served. The lecture is part of a series presented by the UA Sarver Heart Center. Visit heart. arizona.edu for more information.

ANNOUNCEMENTS ALZHEIMERâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S SUPPORT GROUPS All meetings are free; call for reservations. Family members and others caring for people with dementia gather for discussion, education and support from 1:30 to 3 p.m., the first and third Tuesday of every month, at the Oro Valley Public Library, 1305 W. Naranja Drive, 2295300. An Alzheimerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Association Support Group meets at 4:30 p.m., the second Monday of every month, at Santa Catalina Villas retirement community, 7500 N. Calle Sin Envidia, 730-3132. An Alzheimerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s caregiver support group and concurrent activity group for those with the disease meet from 10:30 to 11:30 a.m., the second and fourth Tuesday every month, at TMCâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s El Dorado Campus, 1400 N. Wilmot Road. A second Alzheimerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s caregiver group meets there from 10:30 to noon, the first and third Thursday; call 324-1960 for reservations. CURVES LAUGHTER YOG-HA CLUB Curves. 2816 N. Campbell Ave. 326-1251. Men, women and children laugh for well-being from 5:30 to


6:30 p.m., every Sunday; freewill donation. Call Judy at 822-8278, or visit laughteryogawithgita.com for more information. FAMILY CAREGIVER SUPPORT GROUP St. Philip’s in the Hills Episcopal Church. 4440 N. Campbell Ave. 299-6421. Any family caregiver who needs a safe place to share highs and lows, learn about resources, ask questions and develop coping skills is invited to drop into this facilitated group from 10 to 11:30 a.m., the first and third Wednesday of every month; free. Participants may attend as often or as seldom as they like. Call 790-0504 or 891-3299 for more information. HIV TESTING SAAF. 375 S. Euclid Ave. 628-7223. The Centers for Disease Control recommend HIV testing for all people ages 13 through 64. Visit napwa.org for more information on AIDS testing and its benefits. Testing hours at SAAF are 8 a.m. to 1 p.m., every Monday and Wednesday; and 1 to 8 p.m., Tuesday and Thursday. All testing is confidential; results are available in about 15 minutes; and counseling is available. Call for an appointment and more information.

KIDS & FAMILIES

of art and writing expressing local children’s understanding of watersheds and the natural world continues through Monday, Jan. 2. Hours are 10 a.m. to 8 p.m., Monday through Thursday; 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday; 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday; and 1 to 5 p.m., Sunday; free. Call 615-7855, or email eeducation@pima.gov.

ANNOUNCEMENTS STORIES IN THE GARDEN Tohono Chul Park. 7366 N. Paseo del Norte. 7426455. Kids and their parents listen to traditional and original stories about the desert and its creatures in the Garden for Children at 10 a.m., every Tuesday; $7, $5 senior or active military, $3 student with ID, $2 child ages 5 through 12, free member or child age 5 or younger, includes admission to the park. TEEN GAMES Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 2295300. Games and gaming take place in the teen room from 3:30 to 5 p.m., the third Friday every month, except August and holidays; free.

OUTDOORS EVENTS THIS WEEK

EVENTS THIS WEEK ALL TOGETHER THEATRE Live Theatre Workshop. 5317 E. Speedway Blvd. 3274242. A musical adaptation of The Tortoise and the Hare continues at 1 p.m., Sunday, through Jan. 29; $5 to $8. Call for reservations and more information. BOOKMANS 10TH ANNIVERSARY PARTY Bookmans. 6230 E. Speedway Blvd. 748-9555. Bookmans Speedway celebrates 10 years in business with music, balloons, face-painting, cake, trivia and music by Mariachi Luz de Luna from 4 to 6 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 15; free. CIRCUS CRASH COURSE RECITAL Rhythm Industry Performance Factory. 1013 S. Tyndall Ave. Circus Crash Course workshop students demonstrate their circus entertainment skills at 7:30 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18; $10. Visit tucsoncircusarts.org/classes for more information. HOLIDAY EXPRESS AT THE DEPOT Downtown Train Depot. 400 E. Toole Ave. Holiday singing, letter-writing to Santa, a reading of The Polar Express, photos with Santa and Locomotive 1673 and a screening of The Polar Express movie take place from 2 to 4 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; free with a can of food for the Community Food Bank. Call or visit tucsonhistoricdepot.org for more information. KWANZAA PROGRAM Mini-Time Machine Museum of Miniatures. 4455 E. Camp Lowell Drive. 881-0606. The Barbea Williams Performing Company presents a Kwanzaa-themed dance performance at 11 a.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; $7, $6 senior and military, $5 child age 4 to 17, free member or child younger than 4, includes admission to the museum. OUTDOOR FAMILY DAY: NATURAL WREATH-MAKING Brandi Fenton Memorial Park. 3482 E. River Road. Families with children ages 5 through 12 create holiday wreaths using natural materials from 10 a.m. to noon, Saturday, Dec. 17; free. Instructions and materials are provided. Reservations are required; call 615-7855, or email eeducation@pima.gov for reservations or more information. SMARTY PANTS Tucson Museum of Art. 140 N. Main Ave. 624-2333. Children ages 3 and 4 and their adult companions collaborate in hands-on art-making at 10 a.m., the third Saturday of every month; $10 child, $8 member, includes admission to the museum. On Dec. 17, the group explores sculpture. TEEN ADVISORY BOARD Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 2295300. TAB, the teen advisory board, shares ideas and plans teen events for the library, from 3 to 4 p.m., the third Saturday of every month except holidays; free. TEEN MUSIC Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 2295300. Teens invite friends to hang out and listen to favorite CDs in surround sound from 6:30 to 8 p.m., the third Tuesday every month; free. TUCSON’S RIVER OF WORDS 2009 YOUTH POETRY AND ART TRAVELING EXHIBIT Wheeler Taft Abbett Sr. Branch, Pima County Public Library. 7800 N. Schisler Drive. 594-5200. This exhibit

A NIGHT WITH THE STARS Tucson Mountain Park Ironwood Picnic Area. 1548 S. Kinney Road. All ages see stars, planets and other sky features with the help of volunteers from the Tucson Amateur Astronomy Association and their telescopes, from 6 to 8 p.m., Friday, Dec. 16; free. Reservations are required; call 615-7855, or email eeducation@pima.gov for reservations or more information.

SABINO CANYON HIKES Sabino Canyon Visitors’ Center. 5700 N. Sabino Canyon Road. 749-8700. Hikes led by Sabino Canyon Volunteer Naturalists start at 8:30 a.m., every Friday, through Dec. 30. Hikes range from easy to medium-difficulty and last from two to four hours. Most are free and depart from the visitor center. Some require an $8 tram ride. Visit scvntucson.org for details. SABINO CANYON WALKS Sabino Canyon Visitors’ Center. 5700 N. Sabino Canyon Road. 749-8700. Volunteer naturalists lead walks in Lower Sabino Canyon every Monday through Thursday, through Thursday, April 26; free. Parking is $5 per day or $20 per year. Children younger than 18 must be accompanied by an adult. Monday, 2 to 4 p.m.: Secrets of Sabino Revealed. Tuesday, 8:30 to 11:30 a.m.: plant and bird walk with photography tips. Wednesday, 8:30 to 11:30 a.m.: nature walk with photography tips for insects and rock formations. Thursday, 8:30 to 11 a.m.: Gneiss Walk, a 2.5 hour walk looking at geology. Call or visit scvntucson.org for more information. TOHONO CHUL GUIDED BIRD AND NATURE WALKS Tohono Chul Park. 7366 N. Paseo del Norte. 7426455. Birders at any level of expertise tour the nature trails and gardens of 49-acre Tohono Chul Park and learn to identify some of the 27 resident bird species at 8:30 a.m., every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. A one-hour walking tour of the nature trails takes place at 9 a.m. and 1 p.m., Monday through Saturday. Walks are free with admission; $7, $5 senior and active military, $3 student with ID, $2 child age 5 to 12, free child younger than 5. Visit tohonochulpark.org for more info. WAKE UP WITH THE BIRDS Agua Caliente Regional Park. 12325 E. Roger Road. 877-6000. Spot wetland birds, hummingbirds, songbirds and raptors on a walk from 8:30 to 10 a.m., every Thursday; free. Binoculars are available. All ages welcome. Call 615-7855, or email eeducation@pima.gov.

SPIRITUALITY

HISTORICAL TOUR OF AGUA CALIENTE PARK Agua Caliente Regional Park. 12325 E. Roger Road. 877-6000. All ages enjoy a guided tour of the park’s historic structures and learn about its farming and ranching history, from 11 a.m. to noon, Sunday, Dec. 18; free. Reservations are required. Call 615-7855, or email eeducation@pima.gov for reservations or info.

CHRISTMAS MEDITATION Ananda Tucson. 1002 E. Prince Road. 299-9309. Meditation takes place from 8:30 to 11:30 a.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; free.

OUT OF TOWN HONEY BEE CANYON PARK BIRDING WALK Honey Bee Canyon Park. 13880 N. Rancho Vistoso Blvd. Oro Valley. 877-6000. A guided bird walk for ages 12 and older leads to Gambel’s quail, verdins, gnatcatchers and other birds of the Southwest desert, from 8 to 10 a.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; free. Call 615-7855, or email eeducation@pima.gov for more information.

UPCOMING TOUR OF LOS MORTEROS AND PICTURE ROCKS A winter solstice tour of Los Morteros and Picture Rocks petroglyphs archaeological sites takes place from 8 a.m. to noon, Thursday, Dec. 22; $15, $12 member. The tour departs from the northeast corner of Silverbell Road and Linda Vista Boulevard in Marana. Reservations are required; call 798-1201, or email info@oldpueblo.org for reservations or more information.

ANNOUNCEMENTS MOUNT LEMMON SKYCENTER SKYNIGHTS PROGRAM Mount Lemmon SkyCenter. 9800 Ski Run Road. 6268122. A peek through the largest public viewing telescope in the Southwest is just part of a five-hour tour of the universe from 3 to 8 p.m., nightly; $48 Monday through Thursday, $60 Friday through Sunday, $30 student. Reservations are required. Visit skycenter.arizona. edu for reservations. Search Facebook for “Mt. Lemmon SkyCenter” for daily photo updates about current events in the universe.

SINGING BIRD SANGHA Zen Desert Sangha. 3226 N. Martin Ave. 319-6260. Meditation and teachings in the Buddhist tradition of Thich Nhat Hanh take place at 4:45 p.m., every Sunday; free. Call 299-1903 for more information. STILLNESS MEDITATION GROUP Kiewit Auditorium, UA Medical Center. 1501 N. Campbell Ave. Stillness meditation for patients, families, staff and the community takes place from 1:30 to 2:30 p.m., every Monday; free. Call 694-4605 or 6944786 for more information. SUNDAY FEAST AND FESTIVAL Govinda’s Natural Foods Buffet and Boutique. 711 E. Blacklidge Drive. 792-0630. Mantra chanting takes place at 5:30 p.m., every Sunday, followed by a spiritual discourse at 6 p.m., and a ceremony consisting of music, chanting and dancing at 6:30 p.m.; free. An eight-course vegetarian feast is served at 7 p.m.; $3. Call or visit govindasoftucson.com for more information. WISE WOMEN DRUMMING Unitarian Universalist Church. 4831 E. 22nd St. 7481551. Mature women meet to drum and sing from 1 to 3 p.m., the first and third Saturday of every month; free. Drums are available. Call 797-9323 for information.

SPORTS EVENTS THIS WEEK

BIRDING AT SWEETWATER WETLANDS Sweetwater Wetlands. 2667 W. Sweetwater Drive. 7914331. Ages 12 and older see a variety of wintering and migrating birds and raptors from 8 to 9:30 a.m., Wednesday, Dec. 21; free. Reservations are required; call 615-7855, or email eeducation@pima.gov.

SONORAN DESERT WEEDWACKERS Tucson Mountain Park. 2020 N. Kinney Road. 8776000. Volunteers age 12 and older help remove buffelgrass and fountain grass from 8 to 11 a.m., every second and fourth Wednesday; and every third Saturday; free. Work may require hiking and working on steep slopes. Meeting locations are in Tucson Mountain Park. Details are given with RSVP, which is required. Call 615-7855, or email eeducation@pima.gov to RSVP.

MINDFULNESS MEDITATION Tucson Buddhist Meditation Center. 1133 S. Swan Road. 745-4624. A Theravada Buddhist monk guides exploration of mindfulness and peacefulness for all levels at 3 p.m., every Sunday. A silent sitting meditation takes place at 6 p.m., every Sunday. Both are free. Visit tucsonbuddhistcenter.org for more information.

EVENTS THIS WEEK

ANNOUNCEMENTS BHAGAVAD GITA STUDY Govinda’s Natural Foods Buffet and Boutique. 711 E. Blacklidge Drive. 792-0630. Shared reading and in-depth study of the ancient Indian text takes place from 6:30 to 8 p.m., every Wednesday; free. Ask the restaurant receptionist to be directed to the room. A free light meal follows. Visit govindasoftucson.com for more information. BUDDHIST MEDITATION AND PHILOSOPHY Tara Mahayana Buddhist Center. 1701 E. Miles St. 296-8626. Buddhist nun Gen Kelsang Lingpur teaches about Buddhist mediation and philosophy at 10 a.m., each Sunday, and repeats at 6:30 p.m., each Wednesday, at A Rich Experience, 7435 N. Oracle Road, No. 101; and 6:30 p.m., each Friday, at Sunrise Chapel, 8421 E. Wrightstown Road. Classes are suspended for winter break from Monday, Dec. 19, through Sunday, Jan. 1. Call or visit meditationintucson.org.

BOULDERING GYMNASTICS FALL TECHNIQUE CLINIC The BLOC Climbing and Fitness. 8975 E. Tanque Verde Road. 882-5924. Professional climber Timy Fairfield teaches bouldering etiquette, spotting techniques and gymnastic falling techniques from 6 to 7 p.m., Monday, Dec. 19; free. TUCSON ULTIMATE Ochoa Park. 3450 N. Fairview Ave. 791-4873. A low-key pick-up game takes place from 7 to 9 p.m., Wednesday, Dec. 21; free. Visit tucsonultimate.com for more information and a schedule for 2012. UA MEN’S BASKETBALL UA McKale Memorial Center. 1721 E. Enke Drive. Tickets are $19 to $120; visit arizonawildcats.com for tickets or more information. Tuesday, Dec. 20, at 6 p.m.: Oakland. Thursday, Dec. 22, at 5 p.m.: Bryant University. Saturday, Dec. 31, time TBA: Arizona State. UA WOMEN’S BASKETBALL UA McKale Memorial Center. 1721 E. Enke Drive. Tickets are $5 to $10; visit arizonawildcats.com for tickets and more information. Wednesday, Dec. 21, at 5 p.m.: New Mexico. Wednesday, Dec. 28, at 7 p.m.: UNLV.

ANNOUNCEMENTS

DESERT RAIN ZEN MEDITATION Little Chapel of All Nations. 1052 N. Highland Ave. 623-1692. Weekly sits aim to bring traditional forms inherited from China and Japan into the contemporary world from 4:30 to 6 p.m., every Saturday; free. Everyone is welcome; those who haven’t sat with the group before are asked to arrive by 4:15 p.m. Visit desertrainzen.org for more information.

POOL TOURNAMENTS Pockets Pool and Pub. 1062 S. Wilmot Road. 5719421. Nine-ball tournaments take place according to handicap at 5 p.m., Sunday, and 7:30 p.m., Wednesday, for 9 and under; and at 7:30 p.m., Monday, for 8 and under. Tournaments for handicaps 9 and under take place at noon, every Saturday: 14.1 straight pool the first Saturday; nine-ball the second and fourth Saturday; 10-ball the third Saturday; and eight-ball the fifth Saturday. $10, optional $5 side pot. Unrated players arrive 30 minutes early to get a rating. Chess and backgammon also available. Call for more information.

LGBT BUDDHIST MEDITATION AND PRACTICE Three Jewels. 314 E. Sixth St. 303-6648. Two 20-minute silent sitting meditations, readings from Buddhist spiritual texts, and discussion take place from 10 to 11:45 a.m., every Sunday. Bring a friend and a pillow or cushion; free-will donation, and no one will be turned away. Call 287-3127 for more information.

TUCSON LIGHTNING RUGBY Vista del Prado Park. 6800 E. Stella Road. 791-5930. Women rugby players age 18 or older, all shapes and sizes, are sought for the spring rugby season. Practice is from 6 to 8 p.m., every Tuesday and Thursday. Practice will move to a more central location in January. Email jcbirchfield@gmail.com, or visit lightningrugby.com

MEDITATION AND YOGA BY DONATION Yoga Connection. 3929 E. Pima St. 323-1222. Group meditation takes place from 7 to 8 p.m., every Monday. Meditation techniques alternate weekly among Mantra, Krya, Yoga Nidra and others. Yoga practice takes place from 2:30 to 3:30 p.m., every Tuesday; 3:30 to 4:30 p.m., every Wednesday; and 8 to 8:30 a.m., every Thursday. Call for more information.

VOLLEYBALL Randolph Recreation Center. 200 S. Alvernon Way. 791-4870. Play volleyball every Thursday from 6 to 8 p.m. $1.50 adult; $1 youth or senior. Call for more information.

DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2011

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PERFORMING ARTS A Tucson tradition and a traveling one-man show brighten up these dark December days

Laughs for the Holidays BY SHERILYN FORRESTER, sforrester@tucsonweekly.com n case you haven’t noticed, it’s getting dark around here. The sun has become quite lazy and has cut back its hours, even in this time of high unemployment. But it’s a pretty secure job— union, I think—so we’re stuck. Folks all over town have been pitching in, putting strings of lights in trees and lighting candles to help brighten up the place. And creative theater types have come up with a couple of shows to help us laugh—quite literally—in the face of the sun’s laziness. One play is local in its origin, and the other is, by many accounts, one of the funniest oneman shows on the planet. For the 16th year, Borderlands Theater is staging the ever-charming and constantly evolving A Tucson Pastorela. Basically, it’s an embellished story of the baby Jesus’ birth. As you may recall, there were shepherds out minding their sheep, and out of nowhere came the voice of God, telling them some exciting news involving a baby—and that they’d better get over to Bethlehem. Well, just as we often get sidetracked when we’re searching for important things, those poor shepherds are beset with all manner of events that try to interrupt their journey. The plot thickens, and there’s a bit of conflict, as any good story has— but in a really fun sort of way. Director Eva Zorrilla Tessler can’t even remember the number of Pastorela productions she’s directed. “I’ve lost count. Maybe six years,” she says; she does know she’s served “either as a director or choreographer for 15 out of 16 productions.” Tessler, who is the associate artistic director of Borderlands, says audi-

he Invisible Theatre is also bringing us some theatrical levity to help brighten the darkness. Steve Solomon, who earlier this year brought to our fair city his one-man play My Mother’s Italian, My Father’s Jewish and I’m in Therapy, returns with further personal and penetrating

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ences enjoy the show because “it is a festive, silly and heartfelt play with a hearty local flavor—perfect for the holidays.” Musician and sound designer Jim Klingenfus has also been a part of this Tucson tradition for much of its life, and has been musical director for the last three years. Last year, he was also given a plum role: Lucifer. He considers it quite an honor. “He’s the chief bad guy. He and his minions, Satan and Moloch, are the ones who conspire to get the shepherds to ignore their orders from God to get to Bethlehem.” Each year, Klingenfus says, these evil guys enlist one of the Seven Deadly Sins to assist in their sabotage. “This year, it’s Sloth.” The music is an important element of the show. There’s a mixture of traditional and contemporary songs—some in Spanish, and others in English. “The traditional carols are recognizable even in Spanish, and we have great fun using current pop songs. The structure of the piece stays the same,” Klingenfus says, “but we always work in new stuff about current events and local politics and culture. Adults and children get a kick out of this—it’s uniquely Tucson.” Says Tessler: “We allow a sense of playfulness to guide us.” That way, the show can help us “rediscover a sense of wonder.”

Noel Chester, Jim Klingenfus and Julian Martinez in A Tucson Pastorela. 26 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

Steve Solomon in My Mother’s Italian, My Father’s Jewish and I’m Home for the Holidays. insights (not) into the insane group of individuals who constitute what we know as family. My Mother’s Italian, My Father’s Jewish and I’m Home for the Holidays will be here for two performances next week. “Steve comes up with brilliant titles,” IT managing artistic director Susan Claassen says with a laugh. “You know exactly what you’re going to get.” Speaking by telephone from his home in South Florida, where he was taking a 14-hour respite from 28 performances scheduled across the country in December, Solomon says he is looking forward to returning to Tucson. “The audiences were great. They absolutely got it,” he says. “That doesn’t happen all the time. Sometimes, they just stare—you can hear them shifting in their seats and saying, ‘Ma, is this guy supposed to be funny?’” That statement doesn’t sound as funny on the page as it did on the phone, because you don’t get to hear the way Solomon said it. And that’s a big part of the magic of Solomon and his shows: He may be just one lone man up there, but you would swear there’s a company of 20. So amazing is he in his mimicry that you instantly recognize the character he is channeling, and in the next instant, you realize that he’s channeling yet another. “He is so vivid in his transformations,” Claassen says, “that you know exactly who he is and where, and you feel you’re right in the same room with everyone.” Says Solomon, who was raised in Brooklyn, “I’ve been around accents all my life. I worked as a delivery guy for a Chinese restaurant when I was a kid, and people would never let me in to bring them their food if I just spoke as myself. So I started announcing my delivery in a Chinese accent, and the door would open right up.”

A Tucson Pastorela Presented by Borderlands Theater 7:30 p.m., Thursday through Saturday, Dec. 15 through 17; 2 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18 Tucson Convention Center Leo Rich Theater 260 S. Church Ave. $6 to $22 Runs 80 minutes, with no intermission 882-7406; www.borderlandstheater.org

My Mother’s Italian, My Father’s Jewish and I’m Home for the Holidays Presented by the Invisible Theatre 7:30 p.m., Monday, Dec. 19, and Tuesday, Dec. 20 Berger Performing Arts Center 1200 W. Speedway Blvd. Runs 90 minutes, with no intermission $42 882-9721; www.invisibletheatre.com

The key characters in the upcoming show are based on real people, loving exaggerations of uncles, aunts and cousins, says Solomon, who claims he had a wonderful upbringing and has never been in therapy. But the holidays always bring special challenges, and he promises we will recognize ourselves and our own families as he shares his. “His humor is universal, and it’s never mean-spirited,” Claassen says of Solomon. “He’s actually a lovely and charming guy, a real mensch.” So what if it’s dark outside? If you need to lighten things up, here are two pretty good bets.


DANCE City Week Guidelines. Send information for City Week to Listings Editor, Tucson Weekly, P.O. Box 27087, Tucson, AZ 85726, e-mail our account at listings@tucsonweekly.com or submit a listing online at tucsonweekly.com. The deadline is Monday at noon, 11 days before the Thursday publication date. Please include a short description of your event; the date, time and address where it is taking place; information about fees; and a phone number where we can reach you for more information. Because of space limitations, we can’t use all items. Event information is accurate as of press time. The Weekly recommends calling event organizers to check for last-minute changes in location, time, price, etc.

EVENTS THIS WEEK

ans, gays and allies meets from 6 to 8:30 p.m., every Tuesday; free. All dancers are welcome. Call 886-0716, or visit azgaydance.org for more information.

MUSIC EVENTS THIS WEEK ALLEGRO SCHOOL OF MUSIC Holsclaw Hall. UA School of Music, 1017 N. Olive Road. 621-1162. Students of the Allegro School of Music play a variety of instruments and styles from 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18; free with a donation to Emerge! Center Against Domestic Abuse. Visit allegroschoolofmusic.net for a donation wish list and more information. ARIZONA REPERTORY SINGERS Tickets are $15 for all performances. Friday, Dec. 16, at 7:30 p.m.: Desert View Performing Arts Center, 39900 S. Clubhouse Drive, SaddleBrooke. Sunday, Dec. 18, at 3 p.m.: Fountain of Life Lutheran Church, 710 S. Kolb Road. Visit arsingers.org for more information.

ARIZONA DANCE THEATRE’S NUTCRACKER BALLET PCC Proscenium Theatre. Pima Community College West Campus, 2202 W. Anklam Road. 206-6986. A company comprising members of the UA dance program, Academy of Ballet and Creative Dance Arts performs The Nutcracker Ballet at 2 p.m., Saturday and Sunday, Dec. 17 and 18; $25, $15 age 17 and younger.

CONCERT OF LESSONS AND CAROLS St. Philip’s in the Hills Episcopal Church. 4440 N. Campbell Ave. 299-6421. A new work by Tucson composer Gerald Near premieres at a concert featuring new and traditional Christmas music from around the world at 7:30 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; and 2 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18; $25 to $35, $20 to $30 advance, free student.

DANCING IN THE STREETS Fox Tucson Theatre. 17 W. Congress St. 624-1515. The Civic Orchestra of Tucson provides live accompaniment to Dancing in the Streets AZ’s performance of El Cascanueces at 3 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18; $13 to $50 VIP. A musical petting zoo, a silent auction and a photo-op with the Sugar Plum Fairy take place in the lobby. VIP admission includes a 2 p.m. event featuring a light lunch and a pre-performance concert by classical guitarist Gabriel Ayala. Search for El Cascanueces (The Nutcracker Ballet) on Facebook for more information.

DIANE VAN DEURZEN AND LISA OTEY The duo present “A Holiday to Remember” at 7 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17, St. Francis in the Foothills, 4625 E. River Road; and Monday, Dec. 19, Z Mansion, 288 N. Church Ave.; both $15. Visit lisaotey.com for tickets; donations of socks and blankets are requested for the Z Mansion performance. The show is repeated at 7 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18, at O’Shaughnessy’s, 2200 N. Camino Principal; $25 includes dinner. Call 296-7474 for reservations for the 6 p.m. seating and request chicken or steak.

ECSTATIC DANCE TUCSON Rhythm Industry Performance Factory. 1013 S. Tyndall Ave. Participants express themselves with dance, and have fun in an alcohol-, drug- and judgment-free environment, at 7:30 p.m., the third Saturday every month; $7 suggested donation, free child. Call 229-6247 for more information.

FOX TUCSON THEATRE CONCERTS Fox Tucson Theatre. 17 W. Congress St. 624-1515. Visit foxtucsontheatre.org for tickets and a complete schedule of upcoming events. Friday, Dec. 16, at 7:30 p.m., Christmas with Aaron Neville; $25 to $65. Saturday, Dec. 17, at 8 p.m.: Neshama Carlebach and Gospel Choir; $25 to $45.

ZUZI DANCE COMPANY ZUZI’s Theater. 738 N. Fifth Ave. 629-0237. Solstice Performance: Sombra y Luz features modern and aerial dance in a multi-generational performance including faculty and students of the company’s school. A silent auction and an exhibit and sale of art featuring themes of shadow and light benefit the school. Evening performances are at 7:30 p.m., Friday, Dec. 16, through Sunday, Dec. 18; $18; and Wednesday, Dec. 21; $20, $15 student and senior. Visit zuzimoveit.org.

KALIMBA CHRISTMAS CONCERT Quaker Meeting House. 931 N. Fifth Ave. Mark Holdaway presents a concert with Grace Hartman and Linda Rothchild from 7 to 9 p.m., Friday, Dec. 16; $5 to $20 suggested donation helps pay for repairs to the meeting house.

UPCOMING BALLET TUCSON Tucson Convention Center. 260 S. Church Ave. 7914101. The Nutcracker is performed at the Tucson Music Hall, at 7:30 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 22; 3 and 7:30 p.m., Friday, Dec. 23; and 3 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 24; $20 to $54. Visit ballettucson.org or Ticketmaster.com for tickets or more information. THE MOSCOW BALLET Fox Tucson Theatre. 17 W. Congress St. 624-1515. The Great Russian Nutcracker is performed at 4 and 8 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 22; $27.50 to $102, and $350 for loge seats. Call or visit foxtucsontheatre.org for tickets.

ANNOUNCEMENTS CONTRA DANCING First United Methodist Church. 915 E. Fourth St. 6226481. Live music, callers and an alcohol- and smokefree environment are provided for contra dancing at 7 p.m., the first, third and fourth Saturday each month; $8. An introductory lesson takes place at 6:30 p.m.; dancing begins at 7 p.m. Call 325-1902, or visit tftm. org for more information. FREE TANGO LESSONS AND DANCE Casa Vicente Restaurante Español. 375 S. Stone Ave. 884-5253. A free class for beginners (no partner necessary) takes place from 7 to 8 p.m., each Wednesday; and tango-dancing continues from 8 to 10 p.m.; free. Call 245-6158 for information. T-SQUARES DANCE CLUB Cornerstone Fellowship Social Hall. 2909 N. Geronimo Ave. 622-4626. A modern square-dance club for lesbi-

MUSIC WITH ART Etherton Gallery. 135 S. Sixth Ave. 624-7370. A recital featuring cellist Theodore Buchholz and violinists Benjamin Nisbet and Yvonne Creanga takes place at 5:30 p.m., Friday, Dec. 16; $15 suggested donation. The program includes works by Haydn, Webern and Dohányi, selected for compatibility with the exhibition Kate Breakey: Slow Light, currently on display in the gallery. SONS OF ORPHEUS Thursday, Dec. 15, at 6 and 8 p.m.: holiday concerts benefit San Xavier Mission reconstruction; 1950 W. San Xavier Road; $90. Sunday, Dec. 18, at 3 p.m.: holiday concert; Madera Clubhouse, Quail Creek Country Club, 2055 E. Quail Crossing Blvd., Green Valley; $20. Visit sonsoforpheus.org for more information. SOUNDS OF WINTER CONCERT Catalina Foothills High School Auditorium. 4300 E. Sunrise Drive. 577-5090. Artistic director Marcela Molina conducts the five choirs of the 25-year-old Tucson Girls Chorus at 7 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; $15, free younger than 2. The choirs perform separately and combined. TUCSON SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA Saturday, Dec. 17, at 7:30 p.m.; and Sunday, Dec. 18, at 2 p.m.: “Holiday Spectacular,” with Tucson Regional Ballet, Mariachi Aztlan de Pueblo High School and Santa Claus; Tucson Music Hall, 260 S. Church Ave.; $25 to $52. Saturday, Dec. 31, at 6:30 p.m.: “New Year’s Eve: Moveable Musical Feast”; Arizona Inn, 2200 E. Elm St.; $199. Visit tucsonsymphony.org, or call 882-8585 for tickets or more information.

OUT OF TOWN

younger than 17. Dec. 17 and 18: Arvel Bird, violinist and Native American flutist. Dec. 24 and 25: Closed. Monday, Dec. 26: Dolan Ellis. Visit arizonafolklore.com for information about the folklore preserve and a schedule of upcoming performances. CHRISTMAS CONCERT WITH DOLAN ELLIS Tubac Presidio State Historic Park. 1 Burruel St. Tubac. 398-2252. Arizona’s Official Balladeer Dolan Ellis presents “An Arizona Christmas” in the 1885 territorial school house at 2 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; $20, free age 14 and younger. Call for reservations. DESERT VIEW PERFORMING ARTS CENTER Desert View Performing Arts Center. 39900 S. Clubhouse Drive. SaddleBrooke. 825-5318. Thursday, Dec. 15, at 4:30 p.m.: Mike’s Holiday Mixer; $25 includes dinner and entertainment. Friday, Dec. 16, at 7:30 p.m.: Arizona Repertory Singers; $20. Visit tickets. saddlebrooketwo.com for tickets and more information. FOR THE LOVE OF MUSIC Bisbee Women’s Club. 7 Ledge Ave. Bisbee. (520) 432-3204. Kevin Qais Essar plays rabab, and Joshua Michael Carro plays tabla for two concerts, each featuring a different program of ragas, at 8 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; and 3 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18; $10 adult, free student through high school. Call (520) 432-7217 for more information. TUBAC MAIN PLAZA STAGE Tubac Plaza. 14 Will Rogers Lane. Tubac. 398-9409. TaliasVan’s Bright and Morning Star Choir, featuring 40 voices, performs at 2 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18, following an opening set by Israfel Awakened; freewill donation.

ANNOUNCEMENTS BLUEGRASS MUSIC JAM SESSIONS The Desert Bluegrass Association hosts free public jam sessions monthly. The first Sunday, 7 to 9 p.m.: Udall Recreation Center, 7200 E. Tanque Verde Road, 2961231. The first Wednesday, 7 to 9 p.m.: Rincon Market, 2315 E. Sixth St., 296-1231. The third Thursday, 6 to 8 p.m.: Pinnacle Peak Restaurant, 6541 E. Tanque Verde Road, 296-0911. The fourth Sunday, 4 to 6 p.m.: Thirsty’s Neighborhood Grill, 2422 N. Pantano Road, 885-6585. The fourth Wednesday, from 4 to 6 p.m.: Pickers only; 17th Street Market, 840 E. 17th St., 7922588. Call the phone number provided for each venue for more information.

CONTINUING BEOWULF ALLEY’S OLD TIME RADIO THEATRE Beowulf Alley Theatre Company. 11 S. Sixth Ave. 8820555. A reading of radio scripts from the ‘30s,’40s and ’50s takes place at 7 p.m., the first and third Tuesday of every month; $10, $5 ages 4 through 12. Dec. 20: Orson Welles’ A Christmas Carol. Call or visit beowulfalley.org for more information. BEOWULF THEATRE COMPANY Beowulf Alley Theatre Company. 11 S. Sixth Ave. 8820555. A Cactus Christmas by John Vornholt continues through Saturday, Dec. 24. Performances are at 7 p.m., Wednesday through Friday; and 2:30 p.m., Saturday and Sunday; $19, $17 senior or student, $8 child 12 or younger; Call or visit beowulfalley.org for reservations. THE COMEDY PLAYHOUSE Comedy Playhouse and School. 3620 N. First Ave. 260-6442. A Christmas Carol continues through Friday, Dec. 30; $18, $16 senior or student. Performances are at 7:30 p.m., Friday and Saturday, through Saturday, Dec. 17; 3 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18; and Monday through Friday, Dec. 19 through 23; and Dec. 26 through 30. Call or email bruceb1786@aol.com for reservations. THE GASLIGHT THEATRE The Gaslight Theatre. 7010 E. Broadway Blvd. 8869428. Christmas in the Big Apple continues through Sunday, Jan. 1. Showtimes are at 3, 6 and 8:30 p.m., Monday through Friday; noon, 3, 6 and 8:30 p.m., Saturday; noon, 3 and 7 p.m., Sunday; closed Sunday, Dec. 25; 3, 6 and 9:30 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 31; and 12:30 p.m., Sunday, Jan. 1; $17.95 adult, $7.95 age 12 and younger, $15.95 student, military and senior. Show times may vary. Call or visit thegaslighttheatre. com for reservations or more information. LIVE THEATRE WORKSHOP Live Theatre Workshop. 5317 E. Speedway Blvd. 3274242. Reckless, by Craig Lucas, continues through Saturday, Dec. 31. Show times are 7:30 p.m., Friday and Saturday, Dec. 16 and 17; 3 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18; and 7:30 p.m., Friday, Dec. 23 and 30; $18, $16 student, senior and military. Call or visit livetheatreworkshop.org for information. NOT BURNT OUT JUST UNSCREWED A comedy troupe performs family-friendly improv for freewill donations at 7:30 p.m., the first Friday of every

CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE TUCSON WOMEN’S CHORUS Enrollment for new members is ongoing; no auditions, sight-reading or experience are required; $80 adults, free for girls with a singing adult, free for first-time guests, scholarships available. Rehearsals are at 7 p.m., every Monday, at St. Mark’s Presbyterian Church, 3809 E. Third St.; and at 7 p.m., every Thursday, at Unitarian Universalist Congregation of Northwest Tucson, 3601 W. Cromwell Drive. Call 743-0991, or visit tucsonwomenschorus.org for more information.

THEATER OPENING THIS WEEK ARTS EXPRESS Sahuaro High School. 545 N. Camino Seco. 731-7100. Follow the Star, depicting the Christmas story in music, drama and dance by the Arts Express chorus, orchestra and soloists, is staged at 7 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; and 3 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18; $12. Visit artsexpress.org for tickets and more information. BORDERLANDS THEATER Leo Rich Theater. 260 S. Church Ave. 791-4101. Christmas carols in Spanish and English accompany an original adaptation of the nativity story with today’s news providing dramatic leitmotifs in A Tucson Pastorela, at 7:30 p.m., Thursday through Saturday, Dec. 15 through 17; and 2 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18; $6 to $22. Desserts and a meet-and-greet are featured Friday, Dec. 16. The Dec. 17 performance features an audience-participation mock trial in which Los Diablos and El Archangel Michael debate about ethnic studies and the DREAM Act. The Sunday matinee includes a performance by Ballet Folklórico Tapatío. Call 882-7406, or visit borderlandstheater.org for tickets and more information. INVISIBLE THEATRE Berger Performing Arts Center. 1200 W. Speedway Blvd. 770-3762. My Mother’s Italian, My Father’s Jewish and I’m Home for the Holidays is performed Monday and Tuesday, Dec. 19 and 20; $42. If available, rush tickets are half-price a half-hour before curtain. Call or visit invisibletheatre.com for tickets and more information.

ARIZONA FOLKLORE PRESERVE Arizona Folklore Preserve. 44 Ramsey Canyon Road. Hereford. 378-6165. Performers of traditional music are featured at 2 p.m., Saturday and Sunday; $15, $6

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month, at Revolutionary Grounds Coffee House, 616 N. Fourth Ave.; and the third Friday of every month, at Rock N Java, 7555 Twin Peaks Road, Marana. Call 861-2986, or visit unscrewedcomedy.com for more information. PINNACLE PEAK PISTOLEROS WILD WEST STUNT SHOW Trail Dust Town. 6541 E. Tanque Verde Road. 296-4551. The Pistoleros present Santa’s Little Outlaws every night through Sunday, Jan. 1. Showtimes are 7 and 8 p.m., Monday through Friday; and 6, 7 and 8 p.m., Saturday and Sunday; no shows on Christmas; $3, $1 child younger than 11.

PERFORMING ARTS ZUZI! marks the arrival of winter with help from some visual artworks

Solstice Celebration BY MARGARET REGAN, mregan@tucsonweekly.com

ARIZONA ROSE THEATRE COMPANY Temple of Music and Art Cabaret Theater. 330 S. Scott Ave. 884-4875. The Magic of Christmas, an original holiday musical, is staged at 7 p.m., Friday and Saturday, Dec. 16 and 17; and 2 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18; $10, $8 senior or military, $6 age 12 and younger. A photo op with Santa follows the play. Visit arizonarosetheatre.com, or call 888-0509 for tickets or more information. ARIZONA THEATRE COMPANY Temple of Music and Art. 330 S. Scott Ave. 884-4875. John Caird’s lighthearted romantic musical Daddy Long Legs closes Wednesday, Dec. 21. Performance times vary; $31 to $60. Call or visit arizonatheatre.org for tickets or more information.

OUT OF TOWN CENTRAL SCHOOL PROJECT Central School Project. 43 Howell Ave. Bisbee. (520) 255-3008. Art, a comedy exploring questions of art and friendship, closes Saturday, Dec. 17; $9, $7 advance. Performances are at 7 p.m., Friday and Saturday. Call (520) 432-5546, or email lastminutebisbee@gmail.com for reservations or more information.

ANNOUNCEMENTS CALL FOR PERFORMERS Theater, dance, performance art, clowning, sketch comedy and all other performance presentations are sought for the Tucson Fringe Theater Festival in February. Deadline for submissions is Sunday, Jan. 15. Visit tucsonfringe.org, or email tucsonfringe@gmail.com for more information. CARNIVAL OF ILLUSION Doubletree Hotel. 445 S. Alvernon Way. 881-4200. Award-winning illusionists Roland Sarlot and Susan Eyed present Carnival of Illusion: An Evening of Intimate Magical Wonders at 6 and 8:30 p.m., every Friday and Saturday; $29 adults, $24 senior and ages 8 to 16. Tickets include a 2-for-1 dinner special. Audience limited to 35. Call 615-5299 or visit carnivalofillusion.com for tickets and more information. MAGICAL MYSTERY DINNER THEATER El Parador. 2744 E. Broadway Blvd. 881-2744. Murder at the Vampire’s Wedding, a new, 2 1/2-hour, interactive comedy whodunit that includes a three-course dinner, takes place most Fridays and Saturdays; $39. Doors open at 7 p.m. Call for reservations or more information. SUBMISSIONS SOUGHT FOR PLAYWRITING AWARD Arizona Theatre Company. 40 E. 14th St. ATC seeks submissions for its 16th Annual National Latino Playwriting Award. The competition is open to all Latino playwrights in the U.S. Scripts must be postmarked by Saturday, Dec. 31. The winner receives a $1,000 prize. Email jbazzell@arizonatheatre.org, or call 884-8210, ext. 8510, for details about eligibility and submissions.

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rida Kahlo’s life famously alternated between prodigious artistic production and debilitating pain—between sun and shadow. The Mexican painter spent much of her life confined to her bed, and she made many of her paintings flat on her back. But despite her travails, she found a way to turn traditional Mexican motifs into groundbreaking modernist art. So Kahlo is a natural subject for Sombra y Luz (Shadow and Light), ZUZI! Dance Company’s 14th annual solstice celebration. Timed to usher in the winter solstice on Dec. 22, the shortest and darkest day on the calendar, the show aims to pierce the December night with the light of dance and live music. “The theme this year is visual art and dance,” says artistic director Nanette Robinson. During the concert, paintings and photographs are projected onto the backdrop, while the ZUZI! dancers perform modern movements on the floor and in the air. A full band led by guitarist and singer Pablo Peregrina plays for many of the dances. Robinson was partly inspired by Come Together, the Beatles show the troupe put on last spring. “I was looking at art of the ’60s for that show, and I started thinking: We’d never done anything on dance and visual art for the solstice show,” she says. Robinson nabbed Kahlo right away for her dance; other choreographers in the troupe picked the Renaissance painter Leonardo da Vinci, and a string of 19th-century Frenchmen, from Paul Delaroche and Jean-François Millet to Henri Rousseau. “Blood and Gold,” Robinson’s dance about Kahlo, is the longest piece and the one with the most artwork; it also has spoken word and live music. Eleven dancers perform, variously dressed as the traditional Frida, in long skirts and rebozos, and as the broken Frida, with costumes evoking her splintered spine. The six segments trace Kahlo’s life from her childhood and her near-fatal accident on a trolley at age 18, to her tempestuous marriage to Diego Rivera and the deterioration of her body. Projected slides picture some of her most-beloved paintings, including “The Two Fridas,” “The Broken Column” and some of her many self-portraits. Robinson relied on Frida: A Biography of Frida Kahlo, by Hayden Herrera, along with other source materials, as she did her research. “I knew about her life,” Robinson says, “but when I delved into it, I realized what an inspiration she is, what a role model for women.” Despite Kahlo’s tragedies, the piece ends on an upbeat note. “She lived life in pain, but she had such joy in life.”

F

The whole band performs—Peregrina on n guitar, Bobby Ronstadt on accordion, Randy dy Omdahl and Bubba Fass on percussion, and nd Peregrina, Sally Withers and Jackie Hereford rd on vocals. The music includes an original song, “Blood and Gold,” by Peregrina, as well ell as “La Llorona” by Alvaro Carrillo, and “Burn rn It Blue,” composed by Elliot Goldenthal forr the movie Frida. The dance “Chiaroscuro,” choreographed d by Mechelle Flemming, literally looks at sun un and shadow: The title is the word for the painterly practice of using extreme lights and darks. Created for the new Apprentice Company, the work is danced before a backdrop of a Leonardo sketch of hands, drawn in preparation for his well-known painting “Lady With an Ermine,” circa 1489. The recorded music is a moody violin concerto by Philip Glass. Seven dancers perform the aerial work on a length of white silk. Ekida Laurie’s “Potato,” for six dancers, including herself, is set to cello music by Ryuichi Sakamoto. Paintings of peasants by Millet heighten the food theme. “The Gleaners” is a beautifully composed 1857 oil that depicts poor women scavenging for leftover grain in a depleted field. “Woman With a Rake,” from 1856-1857, zeroes in on an exhausted farmworker. A dramatic 1855 painting by Delaroche, “La Jeune Martyre (The Young Martyr),” is projected during “The Holding,” a Flemming dance for six. The artwork conjures up a young Christian woman being drowned in Rome’s Tiber River. Sally Withers sings poetry by Flemming; additional instrumental music is by composer James Newton Howard. The music, Robinson says, is “romantic and spacious” to match the image. A couple of dances rely on contemporary photography, rather than paintings out of art history. Wendy Joy, a former ZUZI! member returning as a guest artist after a four-year absence, chose “Scared,” a photo by Dillon Schultz, to accompany her dance “Walking Through the Shadow of Darkness. ” The photo captures light coming through a door at the end of a dark hallway. With 11 dancers, the piece is about a teen coping with serious cardiac illness, Robinson says, and the movement mimics the “pumping action of the heart and expanding in breath.” The dance “In the Wings,” choreographed by Karyn Reim, uses photographs of winter scenes made by Reim and Stacey Simons. Reim and Flemming dance a duet to the music of Tara MacLean. The nine young dancers of Many Limbs perform “The Edges of One of Many Circles” on the trapezes; the aerial dance was composed by Carie Schneider, new director of

LARRY HAMELIN

LAST CHANCE

Dancer Felice Espinoza evokes Kahlo’s damaged spine, as pictured by the artist in her painting “The Broken Column.”

Sombra y Luz: 14th Annual Winter Solstice Celebration Presented by ZUZI! Dance Company 7:30 p.m., Friday through Sunday, Dec. 16 through 18, and Wednesday, Dec. 21 ZUZI’s Theater 738 N. Fifth Ave. In the Historic YWCA $18 general on Dec. 16-18; $20 on Dec. 21; $15 students, seniors and military Runs 90 minutes, with one intermission 629-0237; www.zuzimoveit.org

ZUZI’s youth company. The music is by Fever Ray, and the art this time is short videos by the Brothers Quay. The community dance, created in workshops by 15 nondancers in conjunction with company dancers, focuses on the theme of crossing the desert. ZUZI did an eveninglength concert on the border in 2010, presenting dances about the difficulties suffered by migrants walking through the Arizona wilderness. This time, though, “crossing the desert” broadens into a metaphor for dealing with challenges of all sorts. “Each person did writing about the times they had to ‘cross the desert’ in their life,” Robinson says. Robinson and Shari Aslaksen converted the workshop stories into the dance “Crossing the Sands,” set to music by Djivan Gasparyan and Iki Levy. The accompanying painting is “The Sleeping Gypsy,” a spare 1897 oil by Rousseau of a desert by night. A woman lies asleep in the sand; a lion stands above. The scene is surreal, but strangely calm, and the darkness of the night is dispelled by the light of the moon.


ART OPENING THIS WEEK BOOKMANS Bookmans. 1930 E. Grant Road. 325-5767. J. Martin Harris exhibits 75 of his works for sale from 10 a.m. to 8 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; free. A silent auction of his more popular prints benefits Interfaith Community Services. CAFÉ PASSÉ Café Passé. 415 N. Fourth Ave. 624-4411. An artist reception takes place for Douglas Weber, Rebecca O’Day and Kim Keast, from noon to 4 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; free. TUCSON JEWISH COMMUNITY CENTER Tucson Jewish Community Center. 3800 E. River Road. 299-3000, ext. 106. Synagogues of Mexico: Photographs by Moy Volkovich opens Friday, Dec. 16, and continues through Thursday, Feb. 2. Except for Jewish holidays, gallery hours are 7 a.m. to 8 p.m., Sunday; 5:30 a.m. to 10 p.m., Monday through Thursday; 5:30 a.m. to 6 p.m., Friday; and 7 a.m. to 6 p.m., Saturday; free. Visit tucsonjcc.org for a schedule. ZOË BOUTIQUE Holiday ornaments created by more than two dozen local artists are for sale at a reception from 6 to 9 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; free. Winter-themed paintings by Andrea Peterson also are on display.

CONTINUING AGUA CALIENTE RANCH HOUSE GALLERY Agua Caliente Park Ranch House Gallery. 12325 E. Roger Road. 749-3718. Feathers, Fur, Lizards and Landscapes, an exhibit of paintings and photographs by Leslie Sinclair and Axel Elfner, continues through Wednesday, Jan. 4. Hours are 10 a.m. to 3 p.m., Wednesday through Sunday; free. Call 615-7855, or email eeducation@pima.gov for more information. ARIZONA-SONORA DESERT MUSEUM Ironwood Gallery. Arizona-Sonora Desert Museum. 2021 N. Kinney Road. 883-2702. Fiesta Sonora, an exhibit of paintings on desert themes by members of the Southern Arizona Watercolor Guild, continues through Sunday, Jan. 8; free with admission. Hours are 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., daily; $14.50, $4.50 age 6 through 12, free 5 and younger. ART GALLERY Art Gallery. 1122 N. Stone Ave. 624-7099, 405-5800. The Secret Santa Show, an exhibit and sale of works by 20 artists, continues through Friday, Dec. 30. Hours are 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., Thursday through Saturday, and by appointment; free. ARTS MARKETPLACE Arts Marketplace. 403 N. Sixth Ave. 271-3155. An exhibit of paintings, jewelry, small encaustic sculptures and found objects continues through Friday, Dec. 30. Hours are noon to 6 p.m., Thursday through Saturday, or by appointment; free. A free altered-book workshop, featuring ways to recycle a book into a work of art, takes place from 1 to 4 p.m., every Sunday. Visit artsmarketplace.org for more information. ATLAS FINE ART SERVICES Atlas Fine Art Services. 41 S. Sixth Ave. 622-2139. Small Works, a group exhibition in all media, continues through Saturday, Dec. 31. Hours are 11 a.m. to 6 p.m., Tuesday through Thursday; and 11 a.m. to 7 p.m., Friday and Saturday; free. CONRAD WILDE GALLERY Conrad Wilde Gallery. 439 N. Sixth Ave., Suite 171. 622-8997. High Contrast, a multimedia exhibition in black and white, continues through Saturday, Dec. 31. Hours are 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday; free. Visit conradwildegallery.com for more information. CONTRERAS GALLERY Contreras Gallery. 110 E. Sixth St. 398-6557. Martin Quintanilla’s Tucson, an exhibit of new acrylic works; and an exhibit of paintings, drawings, prints and handmade silver jewelry by Neda, E. Michael and E.M. Contreras, continue through Saturday, Dec. 24. Hours are 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Friday; and 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., Saturday; free. CRIZMAC CRIZMAC Art and Cultural Marketplace. 1642 N. Alvernon Way. 323-8555. A holiday show and sale, featuring folk art, toys, books, clothing, masks and jewelry created by local and international artists, continues through Saturday, Dec. 31. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Friday; and 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., Saturday; free. Call or visit crizmac.com for info.

DEGRAZIA GALLERY IN THE SUN DeGrazia Gallery in the Sun. 6300 N. Swan Road. 299-9191. Musical Compositions of Ted DeGrazia, an exhibition of paintings, drawings and musical scores Ted DeGrazia composed for his 1930s big-band orchestra, is on display through Monday, Jan. 16. Ted DeGrazia Depicts the Life of Padre Eusebio Francisco Kino: 20 Oil Paintings is on permanent display. Hours are 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., daily; free. Call or visit degrazia.org for more information. DIOVANTI DESIGNS GALLERY Diovanti Designs Gallery. 174 E. Toole Ave. 305-7957. Raíces Profundas/The Depth of Our Roots, a collection of work by Yovannah Diovanti, is displayed for sale through Saturday, Feb. 25. Hours are 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday and Sunday; free. ETHERTON GALLERY Etherton Gallery. 135 S. Sixth Ave. 624-7370. Kate Breakey: Slowlight continues through Saturday, Jan. 21. Gallery hours are 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday, and by appointment; free. Visit ethertongallery. com for more information. FLORENCE QUATER GALLERY Southwest University of Visual Arts’ Florence Quater Gallery. 2538 N. Country Club Road. 325-0123. An exhibit of senior thesis works by BFA students in photography and studio art continues through Friday, Jan. 20. Artist talks take place at 1 p.m., Friday, Dec. 16. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Friday; free. JOEL D. VALDEZ MAIN LIBRARY Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. An exhibit of photography by architect Alfonso Elia continues through Saturday, Dec. 31. Library hours are 9 a.m. to 8 p.m., Monday through Wednesday; 9 a.m. to 6 p.m., Thursday; 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday; 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday; and 1 to 5 p.m., Sunday; free. Call 791-4010, or email askalibrarian@pima.gov for more information. KIRK-BEAR CANYON LIBRARY Kirk-Bear Canyon Library. 8959 E. Tanque Verde Road. 792-5021. Elements in Art, abstract mixed-media work by Mary Kunkel, continues through Saturday, Dec. 31. Hours are 10 a.m. to 8 p.m., Monday through Thursday; 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday; 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday; and 1 to 5 p.m., Sunday; free. MARK SUBLETTE MEDICINE MAN GALLERY Mark Sublette Medicine Man Gallery. 7000 E. Tanque Verde Road. 722-7798. An exhibit of paintings by Logan Maxwell Hagege and Dominik Modlinski, featuring the Two Grey Hills trading post and weavers, continues through Thursday, Jan. 5. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Saturday; and 1 to 4 p.m., Sunday; free. Visit medicinemangallery.com for info. MILES CONRAD ENCAUSTICS Miles Conrad Encaustics. 439 N. Sixth Ave., No. 195. 490-8027. Willow Bader: Bodies in Motion continues through Friday, Dec. 23. Hours are 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday; free. Visit conradwildegallery. com for more information about the artist. NORTHWESTERN MUTUAL FINANCIAL NETWORK Northwestern Mutual Financial Network. 1760 E. River Road, No. 247. 325-4575. Expressions From Two Perspectives, an exhibit of mixed-media work by Sandy Brittain and Marti White, continues through Thursday, Jan. 5. Hours are 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Friday; free. OBSIDIAN GALLERY Obsidian Gallery. 410 N. Toole Ave. 577-3598. Figures and Frames continues through Saturday, Jan. 14. Hours are 10 a.m. to 6 p.m., Monday through Saturday; and 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., Sunday; free. PATCHOULI BLUE Patchouli Blue. 186 N. Meyer Ave. 981-7180. An exhibit of paintings by Juan Carlos Breceda, Patty McNulty and Arienne Ellis continues through Saturday, Dec. 31. Hours are 11 a.m. to 3 p.m., Sunday and Monday; and 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday; free. Call or visit patchouliblue.com for info. PHILABAUM GLASS STUDIO AND GALLERY Philabaum Glass Studio and Gallery. 711 S. Sixth Ave. 884-7404. Studio Hotshots continues through Saturday, Jan. 28. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday; free. PORTER HALL GALLERY Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 3269686, ext. 10. Leading Inward, an exhibit of paintings for sale by Mary Rosas, continues through Tuesday, Jan. 17 in the Porter Hall Gallery; free with admission. Rosas demonstrates her painting from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 15; free with admission. Regular hours are 8:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m.; $8, $4 child age 4 to 12, free younger child or member. Call or visit tucsonbotanical.org for more information.

QUANTUM ART GALLERY Quantum Art Gallery. 505 W. Miracle Mile, No. 2. 9077644. A Taste of Things to Come, an exhibit of work by Matthias and Emily Stern Düwel, Micheline Johnoff and Citizen Zane, continues through Wednesday, Feb. 29, except Sunday, Dec. 25 and Jan. 1. Hours are 2:30 to 8 p.m., Tuesday through Friday; 8 a.m. to 8 p.m., Saturday; and 8 a.m. to 6 p.m., Sunday; free.

DAVIS DOMINGUEZ GALLERY Davis Dominguez Gallery. 154 E. Sixth St. 629-9759. An exhibit of expressionist works by Jan Olsson and clay sculpture by Joy Fox closes Saturday, Dec. 17. Hours are 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Friday; and 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., Saturday; free. Call or visit davisdominguez.com for more information.

SOUTHERN ARIZONA ARTS GUILD Sheraton Hotel and Suites. 5151 E. Grant Road. 3236262. An art show juried by SAAG members continues through Monday, April 30. The exhibit is always open; free. Visit southernazartsguild.org for more information.

DEGRAZIA GALLERY IN THE SUN LITTLE GALLERY DeGrazia Gallery in the Sun Little Gallery. 6300 N. Swan Road. 299-9191. Geri Bringman’s Barriga Llena, Corazon Contento (Fat Belly, Happy Heart), paintings representing how the artist perceives Mexican women’s daily activities, closes Friday, Dec. 16. Hours are 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., daily; free. Visit degrazia.org for info.

SOUTHERN ARIZONA WATERCOLOR GUILD Southern Arizona Watercolor Guild Gallery. 5605 E. River Road, Suite 131. Members of the Southern Arizona Watercolor Guild sell their paintings, many priced at less than $100, through Saturday, Dec. 31. Hours are 11 a.m. to 2 p.m., Tuesday through Sunday. Visit watercolor-sawg.org for more information.

FLUXX GALLERY Fluxx Studio and Gallery. 414 E. Ninth St. 882-0242. Artists’ interpretations of the term “Manhood” are exhibited closing Saturday, Dec. 17. Hours are by appointment; free. Visit fluxxstudioandgallery.com for info.

STONE DRAGON STUDIO Stone Dragon Studio. 1122 N. Stone Ave. 405-5800. Moira Geoffrion’s exhibit Avian Personae continues through Saturday, Jan. 7. Hours are 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., Thursday, Friday and Saturday; and by appointment; free. TEMPLE GALLERY Temple Gallery. Temple of Music and Art. 330 S. Scott Ave. 624-7370. Ken Figueredo (1942-2010): Altered States, an exhibit of inkjet prints made from 19thcentury engravings and inspired by televised images of redacted secret government documents, continues through Tuesday, Jan. 3. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Friday, and before Arizona Theatre Company performances on Saturday and Sunday. Call 622-2823, or e-mail info@ethertongallery.com for info. TOHONO CHUL PARK Tohono Chul Park. 7366 N. Paseo del Norte. 7426455. Wordplay: Artful Words, an exhibition that explores the relationship of art to language, is displayed through Sunday, Jan. 22; free with admission. Hours are 8 a.m. to 5 p.m., daily; $7, $5 senior or active military, $3 student with ID, $2 age 5 to 12, free younger child. Call or visit tohonochulpark.org for information. TUCSON INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT GALLERY Tucson International Airport Gallery. 7250 S. Tucson Blvd. Modello, an exhibit of paintings and prints by Christina McNearney in the TIA Center Gallery, and Our Arizona, an exhibit of quilts celebrating the state’s centennial in Welcome Lounge A, continue through Saturday, Dec. 31. Photographs on loan from Etherton Gallery’s Exhibit Rockin’ the Desert: Photographs by Baron Wolman and Lynn Goldsmith are displayed adjacent to Security Checkpoint B through Sunday, Jan. 15. The galleries are always open; free. Visit flytucsonairport.com for more information. UA POETRY CENTER ART EXHIBIT UA Poetry Center. 1508 E. Helen St. 626-3765. Portraits of Poets, a limited-edition series of Gwyneth Scally’s hand-pulled linoleum prints of famous poets’ portraits, continues through Saturday, Jan. 28. Hours are 9 a.m. to 8 p.m., Monday through Thursday; 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday; and 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday; free. UNITARIAN UNIVERSALIST CHURCH Unitarian Universalist Church. 4831 E. 22nd St. 7481551. An exhibit of work by the 40-member Pima Painting Club continues through Sunday, Jan. 1. Hours are 11:45 a.m. to 1 p.m., Sunday; and 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., Tuesday through Friday; free. UNITY OF TUCSON Unity of Tucson. 3617 N. Camino Blanco. 577-3300. An exhibition of photography by Jan Mayer continues through Tuesday, Jan. 3. Hours are 8:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m., Sunday; and 9 a.m. to 4 p.m., Monday through Friday; free. VINYL TO CANVAS Tucson Pima Arts Council. 100 N. Stone Ave., No. 303. 624-0595. Howe Gelb, Al Perry, Tom Walbank, Emilie Marchand, Gabriel Sullivan, Chris Black and Dimitri Manos are visual artists as well as musicians. An exhibit of their work continues through Friday, Dec. 23, in the lobby and adjacent conference room. Hours are 8:30 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Friday; free.

LAST CHANCE BOHEMIA Bohemia. 2920 E. Broadway Blvd. 882-0800. The Key to Eden, an exhibit of new paintings and prints by Wil Taylor, closes Saturday, Dec. 17. Hours are 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., Sunday and Monday; and 10 a.m. to 6 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday; free. Visit bohemiatucson. com for more information.

LOUIS CARLOS BERNAL GALLERY Louis Carlos Bernal Gallery. PCC West Campus, 2202 W. Anklam Road. 206-6942. Limited Edition: Prints From Artist-Collectors closes Friday, Dec. 16. Hours are 10:30 a.m. to 5:30 p.m., Monday and Wednesday; 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday and Thursday; 10 a.m. to 3 p.m., Friday; and a half-hour before performances at the PCC Performing Arts Center; free. Call or visit pima.edu/cfa for more information. UA POETRY CENTER ART EXHIBIT UA Poetry Center. 1508 E. Helen St. 626-3765. Soldiering/Dreams of Wartime, in which painter Noah Saterstrom and poet Anne Waldman collaborate on a single narrative, close Thursday, Dec. 15. Hours are 9 a.m. to 8 p.m., Monday through Thursday; 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday; and 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday; free.

OUT OF TOWN GLOBAL ARTS GALLERY Global Arts Gallery. 315 McKeown Ave. Patagonia. (520) 394-0077. Barbara Brandel: Sacred Threads, an exhibit of paintings inspired by textiles from around the world, continues through Monday, Jan. 30. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., daily; free. SPIRIT GALLERY Spirit Gallery. 516 Tombstone Canyon Road. Bisbee. (520) 249-7856. Rock Paper Fence, an exhibit of recent work by Laurie McKenna, continues through Sunday, Jan. 15. Hours are noon to 6 p.m., Friday and Saturday; and noon to 4 p.m., Sunday; free. Call (520) 432-5491 for more information. TUBAC CENTER OF THE ARTS Tubac Center of the Arts. 9 Plaza Road. Tubac. (520) 398-2371. The 41st Annual Members’ Only Show and a showcase of hand-crafted gifts, collectibles and miniatures continue through Monday, Jan. 2. Hours are 10 a.m. to 4:30 p.m., Monday through Saturday; and noon to 4:30 p.m., Sunday; free. Call or visit tubacarts.org for more information. UA BIOSPHERE 2 GALLERY Biosphere 2 Center. 32540 S. Biosphere 2 Road. Oracle. 838-6200. Earth and Mars: Stephen Strom, a collection of diptychs that juxtapose abstract desert landscape images with photos of Mars from the NASA archives, is displayed through Friday, March 30; free with admission. Hours are 9 a.m. to 4 p.m., daily, except Sunday, Dec. 25; $10 to $20. Visit b2science. org for more information. VENTANA GALLERY Ventana Medical Systems Gallery. 1910 E. Innovation Park Drive, Building No. 2. Oro Valley. 887-2155. Images of a Storied Land: From Above, a collaboration between photographer Adriel Heisey, the Center for Desert Archaeology and the Albuquerque Museum, features 60 large-format aerial photographs of historical landscapes across the Southwest. The exhibit continues through Saturday, Jan. 7. Hours are 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., the first and third Saturday of every month, or by appointment; free. Call 797-3959, ext. 9, for an appointment or more information.

UPCOMING DAVIS DOMINGUEZ GALLERY 154 E. Sixth St. 629-9759. An exhibit of abstract paintings by Joanne Kerrihard, narrative paintings by Jean Stern and abstract sculpture by David Mazza opens Thursday, Dec. 22, and continues through Saturday, Jan. 28. Hours are 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Friday; and 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., Saturday; free. Call or visit davisdominguez.com for more information.

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ART

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 29 ANNOUNCEMENTS CALL FOR SCULPTORS PCC East Campus. 8181 E. Irvington Road. 2067662. Pima Community College seeks submissions for Sculpture-on-Campus, a presentation of contemporary outdoor sculptural works. The application deadline is 4:45 p.m., Friday, Dec. 16. Call 206-7608, or visit ecc.pima.edu/sculpture-on-campus for more information.

MUSEUMS

Southern Arizona continues through Thursday, Dec. 29. Hours are from 1 to 5 p.m., Wednesday, Thursday, Saturday and Sunday; $5, free member, student with ID and child younger than 12. TUCSON MUSEUM OF ART Tucson Museum of Art. 140 N. Main Ave. 624-2333. Who Shot Rock â&#x20AC;&#x2122;nâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Roll: A Photographic History, 1955 to the Present, continues through Sunday, Jan. 15. Visit tucsonrocks.org for more information. Docent Ellie Eigne discusses the life and work of Annie Leibovitz at 1 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 15; free with admission. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Saturday; and noon to 5 p.m., Sunday; $8, $6 senior or veteran, $3 student with ID, free younger than 13 and everyone the first Sunday every month.

EVENTS THIS WEEK

Last Chance

UA MUSEUM OF ART UA Museum of Art. 1031 N. Olive Road. 621-7567. Good Vibrations: The Guitar as Design, Craft and Function, a Tucson Rocks! exhibition, continues through Sunday, Jan. 15. Visit tucsonrocks.org for more info. Paseo de Humanidad, a 13-piece installation of lifesize migrant figures and Mayan and Aztec codices, is displayed through Sunday, March 11, as a backdrop for Soundscapes of the Border and The Border Centennial Project: An Exhibition and Symposium. The Samuel H. Kress Collection and the altarpiece from Ciudad Rodrigo are on display until further notice. Hours are 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday through Friday; and noon to 4 p.m., Saturday and Sunday; $5, free member, student, child, faculty and staff with ID. Call or visit artmuseum.arizona.edu for more information.

To Send Us

A HEALTHY CELEBRATION Arizona State Museum. 1013 E. University Blvd. 6216302. Terrol Dew Johnsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Through the Eyes of the Eagle: Illustrating Healthy Living continues through Saturday, Jan. 7. The family-friendly exhibition raises awareness about Type 2 diabetes prevention from a Native American perspective. Many Mexicos: Vistas de la Frontera is exhibited through November 2012. Hours are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Saturday; $5, free younger than 18, member, active-duty military and their families, UA and PCC staff or student with ID, researchers and scholars with appointments, visitors to the library or the store, and everyone on days of public programs. Visit statemuseum.arizona.edu for more info.

LITERATURE EVENTS THIS WEEK BOOK-SIGNING AT CLUES UNLIMITED Clues Unlimited. 3146 E. Fort Lowell Road. 3268533. Gary Abromovitz signs his Last Testament of Bill Bonanno, and Jim Turner signs his Arizona centennial picture book, Arizona: A Celebration of the Grand Canyon State, at 2 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; free. BYRD BAYLOR: YES IS BETTER THAN NO Byrd Baylor discusses and signs her new book from 2 to 5 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17, Tohono Oâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;odham Cultural Center and Museum, Topawa, (520) 383-0200; and at 1:30 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18, Amerind Foundation, 2100 N. Amerind Road, Dragoon, (520) 586-3666. CELEBRITY POETS EXHIBIT UA Poetry Center. 1508 E. Helen St. 626-3765. An exhibit of poetry by celebrities including Leonard Nimoy and Tupac Shakur continues through Friday, Dec. 23. Hours are 9 a.m. to 8 p.m., Monday through Thursday; 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Friday; and 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., Saturday; free. DONATE COPIES OF â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;THE GREAT GATSBYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Temple of Music and Art. 330 S. Scott Ave. 884-4875. Donated hardcover and paperback copies of The Great Gatsby are being collected for The Big Read Literacy Initiative from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. Monday through Friday, and immediately before performances, through Friday, March 16. The Big Read is a program of the National Endowment for the Arts designed to restore reading to the center of American culture.

CENTER FOR CREATIVE PHOTOGRAPHY Center for Creative Photography. 1030 N. Olive Road. 621-7968. Ansel Adams: The View From Here, featuring 40 photographs of the Yosemite wilderness taken in the 1910s and â&#x20AC;&#x2122;20s, continues through Sunday, Feb. 5. Hours are 9 a.m. to 5 p.m., Monday through Friday; and 1 to 4 p.m., Saturday and Sunday; free. Visit creativephotography.org for more information.

ď&#x2122;&#x2026;ď&#x2122;&#x192;ď&#x2122;&#x201E;ď&#x2122;&#x2026; Spring Arts

Preview Listings

FREE THOUGHT ARIZONA BOOK CLUB Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 2295300. Discussion about Deepak Chopraâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s War of the World Views, and the spirituality vs. science debates between Chopra and Leonard Mlodinow, takes place from 12:30 to 2:30 p.m., Wednesday, Dec. 21; free. KERSTIN AND REBECCA BLOCK: THE WAY OF THE BUFFALO Buffalo Exchange. 2001 E. Speedway Blvd. 795-0508. Kerstin and Rebecca Block sign their book about their business, Buffalo Exchange, from 5 to 7 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 15; free.

ITâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S A GAS: THE BRIGHT SIDE OF SCIENCE UA Science: Flandrau. 1601 E. University Blvd. 6217827. An exhibit about the science of gases, including information about climate, micro-organisms, hot-air balloons and how Tucsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s famous neon signs are being restored, continues through Saturday, Dec. 31. Hours are 10 a.m. to 3 p.m., Monday through Friday; 6 to 9 p.m., Friday; 10 a.m. to 9 p.m., Saturday; and 1 to 4 p.m., Sunday; $7.50, $5 age 4 to 15, free younger child, $2 Arizona college student with ID, $2 discount to CatCard holders. Visit flandrau.org for more info.

PURE LOGOPHILIA: POETRY READING AND BOOK SIGNING Casa Libre en la Solana. 228 N. Fourth Ave. 325-9145. Samuel Ace and Maureen Seaton give a reading and sign copies of their collaboration Pure Logophilia at 7 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; $5. Refreshments are served.

MOCA MOCA. 265 S. Church Ave. 624-5019. An exhibit of work by MOCA artist-in-residence Armando Miguelez opens with a winter-solstice celebration from 7 to 8 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17; $10 suggested donation; free member. Mariachi Luz de Luna performs; refreshments are served; and items in the MOCA gift shop are sold at 10 to 75 percent discount. Raymond Pettibon: The Punk Years continues through Sunday, Jan. 15. The exhibit is part of the citywide Tucson Rocks!; visit tucsonrocks.org for more information. Camp Bosworthâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Plata o Plomo continues through Sunday, Jan. 29. Hours are noon to 5 p.m., Thursday through Sunday; $8, free member, child younger than 17, veteran, active military and public-safety officers, and everyone the first Sunday of each month. Call or visit moca-tucson.org.

OUT OF TOWN

Listings@TucsonWeekly.com or online at TucsonWeekly.com

JIM TURNER: ARIZONA: A CELEBRATION OF THE GRAND CANYON STATE Tubac Presidio State Historic Park. 1 Burruel St. Tubac. 398-2252. Jim Turner signs his Arizona centennial book, which features hundreds of historic photos and illustrations, from 1 to 4 p.m., Sunday, Dec. 18; free. A lecture and reception take place at 2 p.m.; $5. LITERACY EDUCATON Joyner-Green Valley Branch, Pima County Public Library. 601 N. La CaĂąada Drive. Green Valley. 594-5295. Robert L. Hunton presents â&#x20AC;&#x153;Coyoteâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Howl for Young Writers: The Front Lines of Literacy Education in the Public Schoolsâ&#x20AC;? at 2 p.m., Tuesday, Dec. 20; free.

THE SOUTHERN ARIZONA JEWISH EXPERIENCE 1850 TO 1950 The Jewish History Museum. 564 S. Stone Ave. 6709073. An exhibit exploring the daily lives of Jews in

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LITERATURE

BOOKS

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 30 ANNOUNCEMENTS

‘Sing’ spotlights verse by contemporary indigenous poets

Antigone Books’ best-sellers for the week ending Dec. 9, 2011

Native Songs BY JARRET KEENE, mailbag@tucsonweekly.com he inherent flaw of the creative-writing workshop—the dominant pedagogical mode in many of today’s university writing programs—is the inevitable homogenization of voices. Whether striving to satisfy the expectations of a group, a teacher or literary-magazine editors, a young or beginning writer risks conforming to a unilingual mode of representation. Of course, standardization isn’t the intention of writing workshops. But inevitably, in the same way McDonald’s standardizes products to improve their efficiency, healthfulness and “greenness,” something is lost along the way. What is lost is the human touch. Sing: Poetry From the Indigenous Americas, a collection that brings together more than 80 living poets from the Americas—South, Central and North—is an attempt to wrench us, at least those of us who read modern verse, from our literary-ensconced sleep and to remind us that there are other languages, voices and experiences outside of the realm of workshops, openmics, and YouTube videos—to help us recognize that terms like “empire” and “oppression” aren’t academic for many people on this planet. University of Nebraska professor Allison Adelle Hedge Coke is known for her own poetry (the excellent Blood Run, about the Native American historic site in South Dakota) and creative nonfiction (the harrowing memoir Rock, Ghost, Willow, Deer). As wonderful as these earlier books are, her lasting contribution undoubtedly will be the series of anthologies of indigenous literature that she continues to assemble. Coke’s previous edited volume, Effigies: An Anthology of New Indigenous Writing, Pacific Rim, is a real treat, focusing on Pan-Asian voices from the Pacific region. But Arizona readers will probably get a lot more out of Sing, written as it is in multiple languages, especially since Tucsonan and master Diné bard Sherwin Bitsui is included in this landmark effort. His dazzling, image-rich poems essentially bookend the collection. “Calyx,” for instance, serves as Sing’s prelude, but it is more akin to an opening ritual, an initiating prayer to both man and God for the strength necessary to articulate the multilingual, geography-spanning, sacred visions and postcolonial anguish of these writers: The night, our cornfield’s glittering backdrop, splatters the windshield and we are flung / back towards dust, our minds forked with spilled ink

T

TOP TEN 1. Role Models

GREAT LITERATURE OF ALL TIMES Oro Valley Public Library. 1305 W. Naranja Drive. 2295300. A reading and discussion group meets from 10 a.m. to noon, on the third Thursday of every month. Free. Info about each month’s selection is available at orovalleylib.com, or pick up the handout at the library. MAIN LIBRARY BOOK CLUB Joel D. Valdez Main Library. 101 N. Stone Ave. 5945500. This group meets from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m., on the third Thursday each month; free. Participants bring lunch.

John Waters, Farrar, Straus and Giroux ($15)

2. Crazy River: Exploration and Folly in East Africa

LECTURES

Richard Grant, Free Press ($15)

EVENTS THIS WEEK

University of Arizona

3. Gabby: A Story of Courage and Hope

352 pages, $29.95

Gabrielle Giffords and Mark Kelly, Scribner ($26.99)

BUTTERFLY BASICS Tucson Botanical Gardens. 2150 N. Alvernon Way. 3269686, ext. 10. Elizabeth Willott, curator of Butterfly Magic, presents an introduction of butterfly biology from 4:30 to 6:30 p.m., the third Tuesday of every month; $12, $7 member, includes admission to Butterfly Magic after the gardens’ 4:30 closing time. Visit tucsonbotanical.org.

Sing: Poetry From the Indigenous Americas Edited by Allison Adelle Hedge Coke

tasting like turtle blood / under our hushed bodies. / How do I describe her daubing my face with a cornhusk? How, indeed. The pressure of singing these songs of identity must have been immense and heart-rending. But the poets gathered here embrace the challenge and never disappoint. Of course, more than a few of the U.S. names are instantly recognizable to those who read contemporary verse—Louise Erdrich, Joy Harjo and Lee Maracle. The latter’s ode to going back to the Stó:lo Nation is unforgettable in its evocation of the Fraser Valley of British Columbia: I’m home again. Killer whales sidle their litheness alongside the ferry. Cedar bows acknowledging my return. Raven calls out a cackled hello. Berries look ready to greet me. Even the sea peels back its tide To permit a trek across her mud just as I land. I can see the wetlands from the hill near my cottage. The tears come. Another notable contributor for Arizonans is Simon Ortiz, who teaches at Arizona State University. Ortiz and Bitsui are part of the concluding series of voices. Indeed, the book’s final section is called “Sing You Back,” which Coke describes in her introduction as a “paean anthem of reclamation.” What Ortiz and Bitsui reclaim is the lost memory of indigenous people and their experiences, which history, written by colonialists, seeks to erase. When Bitsui poetically conjures sunset and dawn, or the symbolic arc of an indigenous song of freedom, or moments of kinship and inclusivity, he shows us how to examine the world around us with fresh eyes: The drum pulsed somewhere in the dark and I heard a woman unbraiding her hair. / I felt morning songs leap from the hooghan’s smoke-hole and curl outward from the roof of the sky, gliding through us like rain. I sang, sang until the sun rose. Coke’s collection prompts readers to recall, as she so eloquently puts it, “the continual literary work of millions of indigenous people in the lands of millions and millions of migratory and settled birds, puckered with millions of mounds laid in tribute, testimony and homage, for all to know. Here is a bit of the music.” Thank you for this morsel, professor Coke. I’m eager to hear more.

4. A Border Runs Through It: Journeys in Regional History and Folklore Jim Griffith, Rio Nuevo ($17.95)

5. Yes Is Better Than No Byrd Baylor, Silvercloud ($19.95)

6. Every Thing on It Shel Silverstein, HarperCollins ($19.99)

7. Cooking the Wild Southwest: Delicious Recipes for Desert Plants Carolyn Niethammer, University of Arizona ($19.95)

8. The Heart of the Revolution: The Buddha’s Radical Teachings on Forgiveness, Compassion, and Kindness Noah Levine, HarperOne ($15.99)

9. Out of Oz: The Final Volume in the Wicked Years Gregory Maguire, William Morrow ($26.99)

10. Unlikely Friendships: 47 Remarkable Stories From the Animal Kingdom Jennifer Holland, Workman ($13.95)

Richard Grant

CHICK LIT Native Seeds/SEARCH Retail Store. 3061 N. Campbell Ave. 622-5561. Pat Foreman, author of City Chicks, discusses how chickens can provide fertilizer and help control insects, rodents and weeds, from 5:30 to 7:30 p.m., Monday, Dec. 19; free. CLIMATE CHANGE IN ICE-AGE ALASKA DuVal Auditorium, UA Medical Center. 1501 N. Campbell Ave. 694-0111. Joshua D. Reuther and Ben Potter present “Upward Sun River Site: Climate Change, Geoarchaeology and Human Land-Use in Ice-Age Alaska” from 7:30 to 9 p.m., Monday, Dec. 19; free. LECTURES ON THE ART OF ADVENT, THE NATIVITY AND THE ADORATION St. Philip’s in the Hills Episcopal Church. 4440 N. Campbell Ave. 299-6421. Kevin Justus explores how artists have historically depicted mysteries of the Christian faith at 10:15 a.m., Sunday; free. Dec. 18: The Adoration: Shepherds, Kings and a Donkey. OLD PUEBLO ARCHAEOLOGY CENTER: FOOD FOR THOUGHT Mimi’s Café. 120 S. Wilmot Road. 747-7273. Archaeologist Lewis Borck presents “Patterns of Violence: Archaeological Migration and Trade Through New Mexico’s Gallina Heartland” from 6 to 8:30 p.m., Thursday, Dec. 15; freewill donation. No-host dinner is from the menu. Call 798-1201, or email info@ oldpueblo.org for reservations or more information. SCIENCE DOWNTOWN LECTURE SERIES Science Downtown. 300 E. Congress St. 622-8595. A lecture series features UA scholars from 2 to 3 p.m., Sunday; free. Dec. 18: Ed Beshore presents “Near Earth Objects: NEOs.” UA SCIENCE CAFÉ The UA College of Science hosts free lectures throughout the Tucson area. Tuesday, Dec. 20, at 6 p.m.: Stroke: Is Inflammation Important? Visit scienceconnections.arizona.edu for details. YOU AND LIMITED EDITIONS: A LICENSE TO MAKE MONEY Arts Marketplace. 403 N. Sixth Ave. 271-3155. Kurt Tallis and Erin Castner explain the strategy and process of reproductions, pricing and related investments from 6 to 8 p.m., Monday, Dec. 19; $10 requested donation. Visit artsmarketplace.org for more information.

UPCOMING URBANIZATION, UNCERTAINTY AND WATER: PLANNING FOR ARIZONA’S SECOND HUNDRED YEARS Student Union Memorial Center. 1303 E. University Blvd. 621-7755. Early registration ends Thursday, Dec. 22, for the Water Resources Research Center 2012 Conference held in collaboration with the ASU Morrison Institute for Public Policy from 8 a.m. to 5 p.m., Tuesday, Jan. 24; $95. A workshop takes place from noon to 5 p.m., Monday, Jan. 23; $140 includes both the workshop and the conference. Reports include “Watering the Sun Corridor: Managing Choices in Arizona’s Megapolitan Area”; “The Water Resources Development Commission Final Report,” and “Arizona at the Crossroads: Water Scarcity or Water Sustainability?” Email jcripps@cals.arizona.edu, or call 621-9591.

DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2011

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CINEMA Jonah Hill’s endearing shtick gets old rather quickly in ‘The Sitter’

Cracking Wise

Casa Video’s top rentals for the week ending Dec. 11, 2011

BY BOB GRIMM, bgrimm@tucsonweekly.com irector David Gordon Green, who gave us the wonderful Pineapple Express, had an unholy misfire this year with the middling medieval farce Your Highness. I count Your Highness as one of the year’s biggest disappointments—if not the biggest. Now comes The Sitter, Green’s third comedy in a row after starting his career with evocative, effective dramas like All the Real Girls and George Washington. While it represents an improvement and a few more laughs per hour than Your Highness, it’s still not worth your time. Jonah Hill, riding high following his excellent performance in Moneyball, goes back to Superbad mode for this one as Noah, a slacker adult stuck baby-sitting some scary kids for the evening. The film has deservedly drawn comparison to Adventures in Babysitting, the ’80s cult classic starring a superhot Elisabeth Shue and Penelope Ann Miller. I’m wondering if royalties were paid behind the scenes on this one, because the two films are very similar. (I just checked the Internet Movie Database, and no Adventures in Babysitting writers get a story credit for The Sitter. 20th Century Fox should start gathering lawyers, just in case Adventures director Chris Columbus and writer David Simkins get pissed off.) The kids left in Noah’s care have varying degrees of weirdness. Best of the bunch is little Blithe (Landry Bender), who loves to glop makeup on her face and shoot perfume into Noah’s mouth. There’s also Slater (Max Records of Where the Wild Things Are), an anxietyridden cute kid who keeps ranting about his “issues.” Finally, there’s foster-child Rodrigo (Kevin Hernandez), who enjoys blowing up toilets and pissing on dance floors. They all pour into a minivan for an adventure-filled night involving clubs, parties and drug-dealers. And, yes, one of the kids farts. It’s an R-rated comedy and has kids, so that means somebody is going to fart, right? Not only does the kid fart; the kid sharts, which leads to unfunny pedophile jokes while Noah loiters in a kids’ underwear section. The Sitter is about as formulaic as a film can get. Stick the crass Jonah Hill with a bunch of crazy juveniles; put the whole lot in some crazy situations; and see what sort of crazy things Hill will say! Hill does have talent, and a lot of his zingers generate at least little giggles, but the shtick grows a little tired after the first half-hour. The drug-dealer subplot is the film’s best

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TOP TEN 1. The Hangover Part II Warner Bros.

2. Cowboys and Aliens Universal

3. The Help Touchstone

4. Super 8 Paramount

5. The Debt Miramax

6. Friends With Benefits Screen Gems

7. 30 Minutes or Less Columbia

8. Our Idiot Brother Weinstein

9. Mr. Popper’s Penguins 20th Century Fox Landry Bender, Kevin Hernandez, Max Records and Jonah Hill in The Sitter. asset, because it involves the one and only Sam The Sitter Rockwell as Karl, a strange man running one Rated R of cinema’s all-time-strangest, and gayest, drug Starring Jonah Hill, dens. He keeps his cocaine in baby dinosaur Sam Rockwell and Max Records eggs guarded by well-oiled bodybuilders. To Directed by David Gordon Green top things off, the place is guarded by a jovial, 20th Century Fox, 81 minutes effeminate man on skates. Now playing at AMC Loews Foothills 15 (888Rockwell has that gift that makes every char262-4386), Century El Con 20 (800-326-3264, acter he brings to the screen wholly original, ext. 902), Century Park Place 20 (800-326-3264, and Karl is no exception. In one instant, he’s ext. 903), Century Theatres at the Oro Valley Marketplace (800-326-3264, ext. 899), Harkins hugging Noah, calling him one of his very best Tucson Spectrum 18 (806-4275) and Tower friends; in the next, he’s shooting at him. Karl Theaters at Arizona Pavilions (579-0500). is quite menacing and horrible, yet surprisingly good-natured, all things considered. Patented Rockwell nuttiness. endearing character. It’s good to see Records’ Were Rockwell in this movie more, I would career go beyond Where the Wild Things Are. have probably recommended it. As it stands, The The Sitter isn’t the best movie for him, but it Sitter feels incomplete, with Hill struggling to keep does show that he has comic chops. it afloat with his endearing, yet tiresome routine. Green showed he was capable of delivering Luckily for Hill’s sake, he showed some dragood, classic comedy with Pineapple Express, matic chops in Moneyball, so his future doesn’t and has had some success with the TV show necessarily rest in R-rated comedies in which Eastbound and Down on HBO. Since then, he he’s constantly cracking wise and dealing with has shown he is capable of delivering subpar sharting youngsters. There aren’t many comedicomedies, including this one. Hopefully, future ans who have been able to keep going solely on projects will see him again exploring dramas, a their ability to generate laughs. Just ask Eddie place where he seems a little more at home. Murphy, Jim Carrey, Steve Martin, Bill Murray, The Sitter isn’t terrible, but it certainly Robin Williams, etc. Hill has a shot at crossing doesn’t deserve a slot in December, when we over with the right succession of projects, with are supposed to be getting Oscar favorites. In Moneyball being a good start. closing, I ask this of the movie gods: For the Of all the performances in the film besides time being, let there be no more comedies from Rockwell’s, Records’ is the best. His Slater is an David Gordon Green. Please.

10. Another Earth Fox Searchlight

Zack Galifianakis in The Hangover: Part II.


FILM TIMES Film times reflect the most current listings available as of Tuesday evening, with screenings beginning on Friday for most opening titles. As schedules at individual theaters frequently change post-press, we recommend calling ahead to avoid any inconvenience.

AMC Loews Foothills 15 7401 N. La Cholla Blvd. 888-262-4386. Call for Wed film times The Adventures of Tintin (Not Rated) Wed 12:30 a.m. The Adventures of Tintin 3D (Not Rated) Wed 12:01 a.m. Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked (G) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Mon 10, 11:15, 12:20, 1:25, 2:40, 3:45, 5, 6, 7:15, 8:15, 9:30, 10:25; Tue 10, 11:15, 12:20, 1:25, 2:40, 3:45, 4:45, 6, 7:15, 8:15, 9:30, 10:25 Arthur Christmas (PG) Thu 12:25, 7:35; Fri-Mon 10:05, 12:25, 7:50; Tue 10:05, 12:25 Arthur Christmas 3D (PG) Thu 2:55, 5:15, 9:55; Fri-Mon 2:55, 5:20, 10:15; Tue 2:55, 5:20 The Descendants (R) Thu 11, 1:45, 4:30, 7:15, 9:55; Fri-Tue 11:10, 1:45, 4:20, 7, 9:45 The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo (R) ends Tue 7, 8, 10:30, 11:30 Happy Feet Two (PG) Thu 2:45; Fri-Tue 10:10, 12:40, 3:05 Happy Feet Two: An IMAX 3D Experience (PG) ends Thu 11:50, 2:30 Hugo (PG) ends Thu 11:30, 2:15, 5, 7:45, 10:30 Hugo 3D (PG) Thu 1:05, 4, 6:45, 9:30; Fri-Mon 10:55, 1:40, 4:30, 7:20, 10:05; Tue 10:55, 1:40, 4:30, 7:20 Immortals (R) Sun 11 Immortals 3D (R) Thu 12:30, 3, 5:30, 8, 10:35; Fri-Sat 11; Mon-Tue 11 J. Edgar (R) ends Thu 1:15, 4:15, 7:15, 10:15 Jack and Jill (PG) Thu 11:05, 1:15, 3:30, 5:40, 7:55; Fri-Mon 12:30, 5:15, 9:55; Tue 12:30 Mission: Impossible— Ghost Protocol (PG-13) Thu 6, 9 Mission: Impossible— Ghost Protocol: The IMAX Experience (PG-13) Thu 6, 9; Fri 12:01 a.m., 10:15, 1:15, 4:15, 7:15, 10:15; Sat 10:15, 1:15, 4:15, 7:15, 10:15; Sun 10:15, 1:15, 4:15, 7:30, 10:30; Mon-Tue 10:15, 1:15, 4:15, 7:15, 10:15 The Muppets (PG) Thu 11:45, 2:25, 4:55, 7:30, 10; Fri-Tue 11:35, 2:30, 5:05, 7:40, 10:20 New Year’s Eve (PG-13) Thu 11:55, 1:20, 2:45, 4:20, 5:25, 7:20, 8:15, 10:05; Fri-Tue 11:20, 2, 4:45, 5:30, 7:30, 8:20, 10:10

Puss in Boots (PG) ends Thu 12:30 Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Tue 10:20, 11:55, 1:30, 2:45, 4:40, 5:40, 7:45, 8:30, 10:35, 11:20 The Sitter (R) Thu 12:50, 3:10, 5:30, 7:50, 10:10; Fri-Tue 11:50, 1:55, 3:55, 5:55, 7:55, 10 Tower Heist (PG-13) Thu 11:20, 2, 4:45, 7:10; FriMon 10:05, 2:45, 7:25; Tue 10, 2:45 The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1 (PG-13) Thu 1:25, 4:05, 7, 9:45; Fri-Mon 10:30, 1:10, 4:05, 7:05, 9:50; Tue 10:30, 1:10, 3:50 Young Adult (R) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Tue 10:45, 1, 3:25, 5:40, 8, 10:15

Century El Con 20 3601 E. Broadway Blvd. 800-326-3264, ext. 902. Call for Wed film times The Adventures of Tintin 3D (Not Rated) Wed 12:01 a.m. Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked (G) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Sat 10:40, 11:20, 12, 1, 1:40, 2:20, 3:20, 4, 4:40, 5:40, 6:20, 7, 8, 8:40, 9:20, 10:20, 11; Sun-Tue 10:40, 11:20, 12, 1, 1:40, 2:20, 3:20, 4, 4:40, 5:40, 6:20, 7, 8, 8:40, 9:20, 10:20 Arthur Christmas (PG) Thu 12:20, 2:45, 5:10, 7:35, 10:05; Fri-Tue 12:20, 2:45, 5:10, 7:35 The Descendants (R) Thu 11:20, 12:40, 2:05, 3:25, 4:45, 6:15, 7:35, 9, 10:30; Fri-Tue 11:20, 2:05, 4:45, 7:35, 10:35 The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo (R) Tue 7, 10:45, 12:01 Happy Feet Two (PG) Thu 11:30, 1:55, 4:25, 6:55, 9:20; Fri-Tue 10:45, 1:10, 3:50 Hugo (PG) ends Thu 2, 7:45 Hugo 3D (PG) Thu 12:50, 3:55, 7, 10; Fri-Mon 1:10, 4:10, 7:10, 10:10; Tue 1:10, 4:10, 7:10 Immortals 3D (R) Thu 11:40, 2:20; Fri-Mon 7:05, 9:40 J. Edgar (R) Thu 12:20, 7:15; Fri-Tue 12:15, 3:40, 6:50 Jack and Jill (PG) Thu 12:10, 2:35, 5:05, 7:25, 9:50; Fri-Tue 10:05 Like Crazy (PG-13) Thu 12:10, 2:40, 5:15, 7:40, 10; Fri-Tue 10:35 The Magic Flute: Met Opera Holiday Encore (Not Rated) Wed 6:30 Mission: Impossible— Ghost Protocol (PG-13) Thu 6, 9; Fri 12:01, 1, 4:15, 7:30, 10:45; Sat-Mon 1, 4:15, 7:30, 10:45; Tue 1, 4:15, 7:30, 8, 10:45, 11; Wed 12:01 a.m., 12, 1, 3:15, 4:15, 6:30, 7:30, 9:45, 10:45 The Muppets (PG) Thu 11:25, 1:05, 2:10, 3:45, 4:50, 6:25, 7:30, 9:05, 10:10; Fri-Tue 11:25, 2:10, 4:50, 7:40, 10:20 My Week With Marilyn (R) Thu 12, 2:25, 4:55, 7:25, 10:05; Fri-Tue

11:55, 2:25, 4:55, 7:20, 10 New Year’s Eve (PG-13) Thu 11:15, 12:10, 1:05, 2, 2:55, 3:50, 4:45, 5:40, 6:35, 7:30, 8:25, 9:20, 10:15; Fri-Sun 11:10, 12:50, 2, 3:35, 4:45, 6:25, 7:40, 9:10, 9:55, 10:25; Mon 11:10, 12:50, 2, 3:35, 4:45, 7:40, 9:55, 10:25; Tue 11:10, 12:50, 2, 3:35, 4:45, 6:25, 9:10, 9:55 Puss in Boots (PG) ends Thu 11:30, 5:10, 10:40 Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Tue 10:30, 11:30, 12:30, 1:30, 2:30, 3:30, 4:30, 5:30, 6:30, 7:30, 8:30, 9:30, 10:30 The Sitter (R) Thu 11:45, 12:50, 1:55, 3, 4:05, 6:15, 7:20, 8:25, 9:30, 10:40; Fri-Tue 11:45, 12:55, 1:55, 3:05, 4:05, 5:15, 6:15, 7:25, 8:30, 9:40, 10:45 The Skin I Live In (R) ends Thu 3:40, 10:30 Tower Heist (PG-13) ends Thu 12:20, 2:55, 5:30, 8:05, 10:35 The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1 (PG-13) Thu 11:20, 2:05, 5, 7:55, 10:45; Fri-Tue 11, 2:05, 5, 7:55, 10:40 Young Adult (R) Fri-Tue 10:40, 1, 3:20, 5:40, 8, 10:20

Century Gateway 12 770 N. Kolb Road. 800-326-3264, ext. 962. Call for Fri-Wed film times 50/50 (R) Thu 12:10, 2:35, 4:55, 7:20 Abduction (PG-13) Thu 12:15, 2:55, 5:25, 7:55 Contagion (PG-13) Thu 12:05, 2:40, 5:10, 7:40 Cowboys and Aliens (PG13) Thu 12:55, 3:40, 7:25 Dolphin Tale (PG) Thu 12:50, 7:05 Dolphin Tale 3D (PG) Thu 3:55 Drive (R) Thu 12:25, 2:50, 5:15, 7:45 Footloose (PG-13) Thu 12:20, 3, 7:35 The Help (PG-13) Thu 12:30, 3:50, 7:10 In Time (PG-13) Thu 12, 2:30, 5, 7:30 Paranormal Activity 3 (R) Thu 1, 3:05, 5:10, 7:50 The Smurfs (PG) Thu 11:55, 2:20, 4:45, 7:15 The Three Musketeers (PG-13) Thu 12:40, 3:45, 7

Century Park Place 20 5870 E. Broadway Blvd. 800-326-3264, ext. 903. Call for Fri-Wed film times Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked (G) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Tue 10:05, 12:25, 2:45, 5:05, 7:25, 9:45 Arthur Christmas (PG) Thu 11:20, 1:50, 4:25, 6:55, 9:25 The Descendants (R) Thu 11, 1:40, 4:35, 7:35, 10:30 The Greatest Miracle 3D (Not Rated) Thu 11:05, 1:10, 3:15, 5:20, 7:25, 9:30

Happy Feet Two (PG) Thu 11:05, 1:45, 4:20, 6:45, 9:20 Hugo (PG) Thu 11:35, 2:35, 5:35, 8:35 Hugo 3D (PG) Thu 1:05, 4:05, 7:05, 10:05 Immortals (R) Thu 11:30, 2:20, 5:05, 7:50, 10:35 J. Edgar (R) Thu 7:10, 10:15 Jack and Jill (PG) Thu 12:10, 2:40, 5:10, 7:40, 10:25 The Magic Flute: Met Opera Holiday Encore (Not Rated) Wed 6:30 Mission: Impossible— Ghost Protocol (PG-13) Thu 6, 9; Fri 12:01 a.m., 10, 1:10, 4:20, 7:30, 10:40; Sat-Wed 10 1:10, 4:20, 7:30, 10:40 The Muppets (PG) Thu 11:10, 12:35, 1:55, 3:25, 4:40, 7:20, 9:55 New Year’s Eve (PG-13) Thu 11, 12, 1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 7, 9, 10 Puss in Boots (PG) Thu 11:40, 2:05, 4:35, 7:05, 9:35 Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Tue 10:10, 1:05, 4:10, 7:10, 10:10 The Sitter (R) Thu 11:50, 12:55, 2:10, 3:20, 4:30, 5:40, 6:50, 7:55, 9:10, 10:20 Tower Heist (PG-13) Thu 11:25, 2:05, 4:45, 7:30, 10:10 The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1 (PG-13) Thu 11:15, 12:15, 1:15, 2:15, 3:10, 4:15, 5:15, 6:15, 7:15, 8:15, 9:15, 10:15

Century Theatres at the Oro Valley Marketplace 12155 N. Oracle Road. 800-326-3264, ext. 899. Call for Fri-Wed film times The Adventures of Tintin 3D (Not Rated) Wed 12:01 a.m. Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked (G) Fri 12:01 a.m. Arthur Christmas (PG) Thu 11:35, 2:10, 4:50, 7:20 Arthur Christmas 3D (PG) Thu 9:50 The Descendants (R) Thu 10:55, 1:45, 4:35, 7:25, 10:10 The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo (R) Tue 7, 12:01 Happy Feet Two (PG) Thu 11:25, 2:05, 4:45 Hugo (PG) Thu 7:35 Hugo 3D (PG) Thu 10:40, 1:35, 4:40, 10:30 Immortals 3D (R) Thu 11:30, 2:15, 5, 7:40, 10:20 J. Edgar (R) Thu 7:10, 10:25 The Magic Flute: Met Opera Holiday Encore (Not Rated) Wed 6:30 Midnight in Paris (PG-13) Thu 6:55, 9:25 Mission: Impossible— Ghost Protocol (PG-13) Tue 8; Wed 12:01 a.m., 12:30, 3:50, 7:10, 10:30 The Muppets (PG) Thu 10:50, 12:20, 1:30, 3, 4:10, 7, 9:45

New Year’s Eve (PG-13) Thu 10:35, 12, 1:25, 2:50, 4:15, 5:40, 7:05, 8:30, 9:55 Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m. The Sitter (R) Thu 12:45, 3:05, 5:25, 7:45, 10:05 Tower Heist (PG-13) Thu 11:05, 1:40, 4:20, 7:15, 10 The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1 (PG-13) Thu 10:30, 1:20, 4:30, 7:30, 10:15

Crossroads 6 Grand Cinemas 4811 E. Grant Road. 327-7067. 50/50 (R) Thu 3:20, 7:45, 10; Fri-Sat 2:30, 7:20; Sun 2:30; Mon-Wed 2:30, 7:20 Dolphin Tale (PG) Thu 1:50, 4:25; Fri-Sat 12, 4:50; Sun 12; Mon 12, 4:50; Tue 12:10, 4:50; Wed 12, 4:50 Drive (R) Thu 11:40, 2, 9:45; Fri-Tue 2:10, 10; Wed 2:10 Footloose (PG-13) ends Thu 11:50, 2:20, 4:50, 7:20, 9:50 The Help (PG-13) Thu 12:20, 3:30, 6:35; FriWed 11:15, 4:30 In Time (PG-13) Thu 6:55, 9:25; Fri-Tue 9:45 Margin Call (R) Fri-Tue 2, 4:40, 7:10, 9:35; Wed 2, 4:40, 7:10 Midnight in Paris (PG-13) ends Thu 11, 5:35 Real Steel (PG-13) Fri-Tue 10:50, 1:35, 4:20, 7:05, 9:50; Wed 10:50, 1:35, 4:20, 7:05 The Rum Diary (R) Fri-Tue 10:55, 1:30, 4:10, 6:50, 9:30; Wed 10:55, 1:30, 4:10, 6:50 Sarah’s Key (PG-13) ends Thu 1:05 Take Shelter (R) Thu 11:10, 4:20, 7, 9:40; FriWed 11:25, 7:25

Fox Tucson Theatre 17 W. Congress St. 624-1515. The Polar Express (G) Tue 2, 7

Gallagher Theater UA Student Union, 1303 E. University Blvd. 626-0370. No films this week

Arthur Christmas 3D (PG) Thu 1:15, 3:50, 6:40, 9:15; Fri-Tue 10:15, 3:45, 9:30 The Descendants (R) Thu 1:20, 4:20, 7:20, 10:05; Fri-Tue 10:45, 1:30, 4:15, 7:15, 10:25 The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo (R) Tue 7, 10:45 Happy Feet Two (PG) Thu 11, 1:40, 4:15, 6:50, 9:50; Fri-Tue 9:55, 12:40, 3:20 Hugo (PG) Thu 12:50, 4, 7:15, 10:10; Fri-Tue 12, 6:10 Hugo 3D (PG) Thu 11:50, 3, 6:15, 9:25; Fri-Tue 3:10, 9:15 Immortals (R) Thu 11:20, 2:10, 5, 7:50, 10:35; FriTue 2:30, 8:10 J. Edgar (R) Thu 11:15, 2:40, 6:05, 9:05; Fri-Tue 9:50 Jack and Jill (PG) Thu 12:20, 2:50, 5:30, 8:10; Fri-Tue 12:15, 2:45, 5:15, 7:45, 10:45 Mission: Impossible— Ghost Protocol (PG-13) Thu 8, 11:10 The Muppets (PG) Thu 12:45, 3:45, 6:45, 9:40; Fri-Tue 9:45, 12:55, 3:40, 6:30, 9:20 New Year’s Eve (PG-13) Thu 12:30, 1:30, 3:30, 4:30, 6:30, 7:30, 9:30, 10:25; Fri-Tue 10:10, 1, 4, 6:05, 7, 9, 10 Puss in Boots (PG) Thu 1:05, 3:40, 6:20, 9; FriTue 9:40 Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Sat 10:40, 12:20, 1:10, 1:50, 3:30, 4:20, 5, 6:40, 7:30, 8:10, 9:50, 10:40, 11:20; Sun-Tue 10:40, 12:20, 1:10, 1:50, 3:30, 4:20, 5, 6:40, 7:30, 8:10, 9:50, 10:40 The Sitter (R) Thu 12, 1, 2:20, 3:20, 4:40, 5:40, 7, 8, 9:20, 10:20; Fri-Tue 10:30, 11:50, 12:50, 2:15, 3:15, 4:30, 5:20, 6:50, 7:50, 9:10, 10:10 Tower Heist (PG-13) Thu 11:10, 2, 5:10, 7:45, 10:30; Fri-Tue 11:30, 5:25, 10:50 The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1 (PG-13) Thu 12:10, 1:10, 3:10, 4:10, 6:10, 7:10, 9:10, 10; Fri-Tue 10:20, 1:15, 4:10, 7:20, 10:20 Young Adult (R) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Tue 11:45, 2:20, 5, 7:40, 10:15

Loft Harkins Tucson The Cinema Spectrum 18 3233 E. Speedway Blvd. 5455 S. Calle Santa Cruz. 806-4275. Call for Wed film times Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked (G) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Sat 10, 10:50, 11:40, 12:30, 1:20, 2:10, 3, 3:50, 4:40, 5:30, 6:20, 7:10, 8, 8:50, 9:40, 10:30, 11:20; Sun-Tue 10, 10:50, 11:40, 12:30, 1:20, 2:10, 3, 3:50, 4:40, 5:30, 6:20, 7:10, 8, 8:50, 9:40, 10:30 Arthur Christmas (PG) Thu 11:45, 2:15, 4:50, 7:40, 10:15; Fri-Tue 12:45, 6:45

795-7777. Call 795-0844 to check handicap accessibility American Teacher (Not Rated) Fri-Sun 2, 7; MonTue 2, 10; Wed 2, 7 A Christmas Story (PG) Sat 10 a.m. Home Alone (PG) FriSat 10 Leningrad Cowboys Go America (PG-13) Wed 7:30 Margin Call (R) Thu 11:45, 10 Melancholia (R) Thu 2, 7:15, 10; Fri-Sun 4, 9:30; Mon 5, 9:30; TueWed 4, 9:30

Mozart’s Sister (Not Rated) Thu 2:15, 5; FriSat 12:30, 5; Sun 5, 9; Mon-Tue 12:30, 5; Wed 12:30, 5, 9 My Afternoons With Margueritte (Not Rated) Fri-Tue 12, 3, 7:30; Wed 12, 3 Revenge of the Electric Car (PG-13) Thu 11:45, 5 The Rocky Horror Picture Show (R) Sat 12 Santa’s Cool Holiday Film Festival (Not Rated) Sun 12; Tue 7 Silent Night, Deadly Night 5: The Toy Maker (R) Mon 8 The Very Merry Holiday Sing-Along Spectacular! (Not Rated) Thu 7:30

Oracle View 4690 N. Oracle Road. 292-2430. 30 Minutes or Less (R) ends Thu 9:45 50/50 (R) Fri-Tue 12:20, 5, 7:20, 9:35; Wed 12:20, 5, 7:20 Contagion (PG-13) Thu 9:20; Fri-Tue 9:50 Cowboys and Aliens (PG13) ends Thu 5 Dolphin Tale (PG) Thu 11:35, 2, 4:25, 6:50; FriWed 11:45, 2, 6:55 The Help (PG-13) Fri-Wed 12:40, 3:40, 6:45 In Time (PG-13) Thu 12:20, 2:40, 7:30, 9:50; Fri-Tue 2:15, 4:40, 7:10, 9:40; Wed 2:15, 4:40, 7:10 Midnight in Paris (PG-13) Thu 11:20, 1:25, 3:30, 5:35, 7:40; Fri-Wed 2:40 Rise of the Planet of the Apes (PG-13) Thu 12:10, 2:30, 4:50, 7:10, 9:30; Fri-Tue 4:30, 9:20; Wed 4:30 The Smurfs (PG) Thu 2:45, 5:05; Fri-Wed 11:50 The Thing (R) Thu 12:30, 7:20, 9:40; Fri-Tue 12, 9:45; Wed 12 The Three Musketeers (PG-13) Thu 11:40, 2:10, 4:30, 7, 9:35; Fri-Wed 2:20, 4:50, 7:15 Warrior (PG-13) Fri-Tue 12:30, 3:30, 6:30, 9:30; Wed 12:30, 3:30, 6:30

The Screening Room 127 E. Congress St. 882-0204. Call for films and times

Tower Theatres at Arizona Pavilions 8031 N. Business Park Drive. 579-0500. Call for Mon and Wed film times

The Adventures of Tintin (PG) Wed 10, 12:25, 2:50, 5:15, 7:40, 10:05 The Adventures of Tintin 3D (PG) Wed 11:10, 1:35, 4, 6:25, 8:50 Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked (G) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Sun, Tue 10:30, 12:35, 2:45, 4:50, 7, 9:05; Wed 10:25, 12:35, 2:45, 4:50, 7, 9:05 Arthur Christmas (PG) Thu 11:10, 1:20, 3:30, 5:40, 7:55; Fri-Sun, Tue 10:20, 12:40, 3, 5:15, 7:25, 9:40 The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo (R) Tue 7, 10:15; Wed 12, 3:15, 6:45, 10 Happy Feet Two (PG) Thu 11:30, 1:50, 4:10, 6:25, 8:40; Fri-Sun, Tue 10:40, 12:55, 3:10, 5:20, 7:35, 9:45 Hugo (PG) Thu 4:30; FriSun, Tue 6:50 Hugo 3D (PG) Thu 11, 1:45, 7:15; Fri-Sun, Tue 10:50, 1:30, 4:10, 9:30 Immortals (R) Thu 12:15, 2:45, 5:15, 7:50; Fri-Sun 1:10, 7:55, 10:20; Tue 1:10 J. Edgar (R) ends Thu 2, 7:05 Jack and Jill (PG) Thu 11:20, 1:25, 3:35, 5:45, 8; Fri-Sat 10:55, 3:35, 5:40; Sun 3:35, 5:40; Tue 10:55, 3:35 Midnight in Paris (PG-13) ends Thu 11:45, 1:55, 4, 6:05, 8:10 Mission: Impossible— Ghost Protocol (PG-13) Tue 6:20, 7:30, 9:10, 10:20; Wed 9:50, 11, 12:40, 1:50, 3:30, 4:40 The Muppets (PG) Thu 11:05, 1:30, 3:50, 6:10, 8:30; Fri-Sun, Tue 10:05, 12:25, 2:50, 5:15, 7:40, 10:05 New Year’s Eve (PG-13) Thu 11:40, 2:10, 4:45, 7:20; Fri-Sun, Tue 11:40, 2:10, 4:40, 7:15, 9:55 Puss in Boots (PG) ends Thu 12, 4:55 Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows (PG-13) Fri 12:01 a.m.; Fri-Sun, Tue-Wed 10:15, 11:30, 1, 2:15, 3:45, 5, 6:30, 7:45, 10:30 The Sitter (R) Thu 11, 1, 3, 5, 6:50, 8:45; Fri-Sun, Tue 11:50, 1:50, 3:50, 5:50, 7:50, 9:50 Tower Heist (PG-13) Thu 11:15, 1:35, 3:55, 6:15, 8:35, 11; Fri-Sat 10:10, 12:45, 3:15, 5:35, 8, 10:25; Sun 12:45, 3:15, 5:35, 8, 10:25; Tue 10:10, 12:45, 3:15 The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1 (PG-13) Thu 11:50, 2:20, 4:50, 7:30; Fri-Sun, Tue 11, 1:45, 4:30, 7:10, 10

Find more film reviews at www.tucsonweekly.com DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2011

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LOG ON TO WWW.GOFOBO.COM AND ENTER THE RSVP CODE: TUWEHURE TO DOWNLOAD A FREE SCREENING PASS FOR TWO WHILE SUPPLIES LAST. SCREENING WILL BE HELD ON MONDAY, DECEMBER 19TH AT 7 PM. THIS FILM IS RATED R. RESTRICTED. Under 17 Requires Accompanying Parent Or Adult Guardian. Please note: Passes received through this promotion do not guarantee you a seat at the theatre. Seating is on a first-come, first-served basis, except for members of the reviewing press. Theatre is overbooked to ensure a full house. No admittance once screening has begun. All federal, state and local regulations apply. A recipient of tickets assumes any and all risks related to use of ticket, and accepts any restrictions required by ticket provider. MGM, Columbia Pictures, Tucson Weekly and their affiliates accept no responsibility or liability in connection with any loss or accident incurred in connection with use of a prize. Tickets cannot be exchanged, transferred or redeemed for cash, in whole or in part. We are not responsible if, for any reason, recipient is unable to use his/her ticket in whole or in part. All federal and local taxes are the responsibility of the winner. Void where prohibited by law. No purchase necessary. Participating sponsors, their employees and family members and their agencies are not eligible. NO PHONE CALLS!

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‘Juno’ writer Diablo Cody gets back on track with this darkly funny Charlize Theron vehicle

Bitch Is Back BY COLIN BOYD, cboyd@tucsonweekly.com omewhere along the way, Mavis Gary (Charlize Theron) just gave up. But how did she wind up here, living in a high-rise apartment in Minneapolis, waking up seemingly every morning in a hung-over stupor to an unwritten page of drippy fiction for high school kids? Over the course of Young Adult’s brisk hour and a half, we learn all about Mavis, and we learn a little more about writer Diablo Cody, too. Mostly, though, we learn to appreciate Charlize Theron’s surprisingly immutable sense of dark comedy. Although it probably would have served her better to show this side of her ability before she transitioned from beauty-queen starlet to Oscar winner, Theron has done some comedy before. Granted, it was on half of a season of Arrested Development, a show that too few people ever watched, but still. This film, however, gives Theron a real chance to take the sort of risks with comedy that she has with heavy-hitting drama like Monster and North Country. Mavis is more than a subpar writer with an alcohol problem; she’s damaged goods, perpetually looking over her shoulder for her misspent potential to sneak back into her life. Rather than address her downward spiral head-on, she chooses another path: When her ex-boyfriend’s wife sends a mass email announcing the birth of their daughter, Mavis decides to head home and show Buddy (Patrick Wilson) what he’s been missing out on all these years. Her strategy, in essence, is to steal a happily married man from his wife and infant child. On her first night in mythical Mercury, Minn., Mavis runs into another old classmate at a bar. At first, she doesn’t remember Matt Freehauf (Patton Oswalt), but then it dawns on her that, as a senior, Matt was bludgeoned within an inch of his life by the school jocks, because everyone thought he was gay. Fun times. A few drinks into a night full of them, Mavis begins to see a kindred spirit in Matt, perhaps because they are both defined, at least internally, by what happened in high school. The rather unconventional relationship between Mavis and Matt becomes the heart of Young Adult, albeit a cold one. We do learn why Mavis can’t seem to let go of the past, specifically her past with Buddy, but in this cutting, well-written comedy, it’s the worsthandled bit of business. After redefining—even if just for a moment—the way movies structure dialogue with Juno, Diablo Cody became a popular

S

Charlize Theron in Young Adult.

Young Adult Rated R Starring Charlize Theron, Patrick Wilson and Patton Oswalt Directed by Jason Reitman Paramount, 94 minutes Opens Friday, Dec. 16, at AMC Loews Foothills 15 (888-262-4386) and Century El Con 20 (800-326-3264, ext. 902).

punchline for her esoteric style and slacker characters. In addition to not being very good, her follow-up, Jennifer’s Body, suffered from the double backlash of people being tired of hearing about Cody and people being tired of Megan Fox. But here, reteamed with Juno director Jason Reitman, she finds her bearings again, delivering potent comedy with none of the artificial aftertaste of her Juno script. That’s not to say it’s a better screenplay or movie than Juno, just that it doesn’t feel like you need to personally know Diablo Cody to get some of the language being thrown around by the characters. The big takeaway, though, is Theron. She has, over and over again, demonstrated that she doesn’t mind being ugly onscreen. She’ll add weight; she’ll pile on prosthetics; and she will portray almost-irredeemable people, because it’s more interesting that way. Mavis Gary is a bitch when we meet her, and no amount of looking like Charlize Theron could change that. Even after Diablo Cody plays her hand, we still don’t come away liking Mavis: We understand her better, but she’s still a wreck of her own making. Unlike Matt Freehauf, she hasn’t been able to accept where she is. But to her credit, Theron is in on all the jokes, including the ones at her own character’s expense.


N O W S H O W I N G AT H O M E Fright Night (Blu-ray) TOUCHSTONE MOVIE B SPECIAL FEATURES C+ BLU-RAY GEEK FACTOR 5.75 (OUT OF 10)

The studio picked the wrong time to release this witty, funny remake of the ’80s vampire cult classic. It was released as a summer flick—and it got trounced at the American box office. (It did, however, make back its budget after worldwide grosses were tabulated.) If it were up to me (and it most certainly wasn’t), I would’ve released this in December, right after the release of the latest Twilight movie. That would’ve given a lot of folks a good vampireaction-movie antidote. Also, there has been a surprising lack of new releases worth dick within the past few weeks—meaning there would have been plenty of space for a good Colin Farrell vehicle. Farrell is great as a handsome vampire who moves into Anton Yelchin’s Las Vegas neighborhood. Their houses are out in the middle of nowhere, a perfect setting for a vampire to make his nest and feed on neighbors. Farrell looks like he’s having a blast, and his enthusiasm is infectious. When he hisses at sunlight in the middle of a great monologue, it’s the mark of an actor who knows what is funny. Happily, he’s also the nastiest and scariest vampire to hit screens since Gary Oldman’s Dracula. The movie follows the basic blueprint of the original: A vampire stalks a high school dude’s girlfriend; high school dude enlists the help of a fake vampire expert to kill the monster; bloodletting ensues. David Tennant takes over the role of “vampire killer” Peter Vincent, made famous by Roddy McDowall. This time out, Vincent is an alcoholic Vegas club act, as opposed to a cheap TV-show host. Yelchin is good as the kid who nobody believes, while Christopher Mintz-Plasse gets a chance to play another

psycho nerd. He has some of the film’s best moments as Evil Ed, a young man who finds out that his vampire paranoia is based in reality. This was released in 3-D, and that was a big mistake. Most of the movie takes place at night, something that doesn’t bode particularly well for 3-D visuals. That was another huge misfire on the studio’s part—but all of the studio mistakes can’t take away from the fact that Farrell rocks in this film. It also contains one of the year’s best cameo appearances. SPECIAL FEATURES: Deleted scenes, bloopers, a guide on how to make a funny vampire movie, and a Peter Vincent featurette.

The Hangover Part II (Blu-ray) WARNER BROS. MOVIE CSPECIAL FEATURES BBLU-RAY GEEK FACTOR 4 (OUT OF 10)

This is a contender, along with Your Highness, for Biggest Comedic Letdown of the Year honors. Director Todd Phillips got everybody from the first film back together and basically told them all to do the same shit over again—except this time, he threw in a monkey instead of a tiger. The gang winds up in Thailand, where Stu (Ed Helms) is about to get married. Against his wishes, Phil (Bradley Cooper) and Alan (Zach Galifianakis) get him to have a drink, and you know what happens next. Yes, you get to see Ken Jeong’s little dick again. This film shows no shame in cannibalizing the original. It even brings back Mike Tyson for a joke that’s so bad, it’s hard to believe Phillips ever made a good movie. Internet buzz says the gang will be back again, but they will be equipped with a different plot and will put this formula behind them. Good. Oh, yeah … the monkey is the funniest thing in the movie.

BY BOB GRIMM, bgrimm@tucsonweekly.com

FILM CLIPS

SPECIAL FEATURES: An

Reviews by Jacquie Allen, Colin Boyd and Bob Grimm.

“unauthorized” documentary about the making of the movie, a feature on Phillips, a tour of Bangkok with the now-annoying Mr. Chow, a gag reel and, yes, more about that crazy monkey.

NEWLY REVIEWED:

Our Idiot Brother (Blu-ray) WEINSTEIN MOVIE BSPECIAL FEATURES C BLU-RAY GEEK FACTOR 5.25 (OUT OF 10)

After a minislump that included Dinner for Schmucks, How Do You Know and Year One, Paul Rudd got back on the comedy track—sort of—with this routine family comedy that benefits from his charms. Rudd plays Ned, a complete idiot who sells pot to a cop, gets incarcerated, and has nowhere to go when he gets out. He winds up crashing on the couches of family members, including his sisters, played by Emily Mortimer, Zooey Deschanel and Elizabeth Banks. The screenplay doesn’t call for anything all that unique, but the performers keep things moving at a pleasantenough and funny-enough clip. T.J. Miller nearly steals the film as the guy who, quite innocuously, steals Ned’s girlfriend (Kathryn Hahn) while he’s incarcerated. Rudd has a knack for playing dopes. Actually, Rudd has a knack for playing a lot of types. Let’s hope this gets him going in the right direction again, because I still haven’t quite forgiven him for that crap Reese Witherspoon movie. SPECIAL FEATURES: You get a commentary with the director, a making-of doc, and some deleted and extended scenes.

MY AFTERNOONS WITH MARGUERITTE

My Afternoons With Margueritte is undeniably sweet and disarming. The downside is that the story is predictable and pretty linear, but the upside is that you’ll probably feel better having watched it, and that’s got to count for something. It features a nice performance by Gérard Depardieu as a semi-literate laborer who begins a ritual of meeting the quite-seasoned Margueritte (97-year-old Gisèle Casadesus) in a park where she teaches him about literature—but in reality, they teach each other about the importance of genuine human connection. Genuine is a pretty accurate description for Margueritte, even though it might feel lighter than air. It’s a simple journey, but its heart is in the right place. As easy as it may be to not take Gérard Depardieu that seriously, he proves again that when he wants to be, he’s a great actor. Boyd NEW YEAR’S EVE

If you have the stomach for it—or the liver—you should start a drinking game based on New Year’s Eve. The rules would be simple: Every time a new celebrity pops up, take a drink! Not only does the game keep going literally until the final credits (Oh, look, Amare Stoudemire!), but you’d end up so drunk you likely wouldn’t remember the movie you sat through. That’s a positive. There’s a real possibility that Katherine Fugate played that very game while writing this mountain of mediocrity. Devoid of a real story or character development, New Year’s Eve is somehow less of an achievement than Valentine’s Day, last year’s lazy Garry Marshalldirected all-call. Make no mistake, though: This parade through the big ball drop in Times Square is loaded with stars, just like the disaster movies of the 1970s. The operative word there is “disaster.” Boyd

CONTINUING: ARTHUR CHRISTMAS

There have been so many Christmas movies over the years that it’s worth taking note of a good one. From Aardman, the Wallace and Gromit people, comes Arthur Christmas, about the son of Santa Claus who, after spotting one present left undelivered, embarks on a worldwide journey to make sure it reaches its rightful home. What good is the “nice” list, after all, if the North Pole is going to muck it up? Deliciously served with snarky British sensibilities, Arthur Christmas is surprisingly sharp for adults and visually enormous and active for kids. The voice cast is top-notch, featuring James McAvoy as the title character, Jim Broadbent as the current yet tiring Santa, and Bill Nighy as the long-retired and feisty Grandsanta, who proudly proclaims he’s 136 years old. This is a tremendous amount of fun, even if you don’t like Christmas movies—or Christmas, for that matter. Boyd HAPPY FEET TWO

Plenty of animated family films feature chaos, but few are, in and of themselves, chaotic. Well, Happy Feet Two is a cartoon in a blender. The central story amounts to not much more than a tribe of penguins trapped in a hole, and the tangents are bizarre and totally pointless. There’s a puffin (the voice of Hank Azaria) who journeys to the South Pole and masquerades as a penguin who can fly, because that’s what we needed in a sequel. There are two krill (Brad Pitt and Matt Damon) who break away from their swarm in the interest of existential philosophy … or something. And there is the continued misconception that Robin Williams is funny. Happy Feet Two delivers very few laughs, some odd song choices—including a baby penguin aria—and the obligatory global-warming warning. Now you’ve been warned about the rest of it. Boyd HUGO

Director Martin Scorsese has a field day with 3-D in this delightful film that, while touted as his first children’s movie, will probably go over the heads of most young ones. Asa Butterfield delivers one of the year’s best child performances as Hugo Cabret, a boy living at a train station. He keeps the clocks running and is trying to fix a robot-like contraption left to him by his father. He meets up with a toyshop owner named Georges Méliès (Ben Kingsley); many film buffs will know that name. The film winds up being a nice homage to early filmmakers, with some of the best visuals Scorsese has ever put onscreen. The ever-reliable Chloë Grace Moretz does good work with an English accent as Hugo’s friend, while Sacha Baron Cohen provides excellent comic relief as a train-station security man. Grimm

LIKE CRAZY

Two 20-somethings meet in college and fall in love. Happens all the time. So that much is almost a prologue in Like Crazy, a movie that, if it finds much of an audience, will convert Anton Yelchin and particularly Felicity Jones into stars. There’s nothing else to look at, frankly. At least one of them is in every scene, and both usually are. The perspective of the film—which covers a relationship that probably gets too serious too soon, and slowly falls apart despite trans-Atlantic efforts to save it—never favors one character over another. Instead, both are held accountable for the relationship’s troubles. Having said that, there’s enough room for interpretation that it could just as easily be nobody’s fault. Spare and wide-eyed, Like Crazy is a terrific examination of young love with some gutsy performances. Boyd MOZART’S SISTER

It’s tough to be compared to a classic like Amadeus in almost any respect—and that’s not all that plagues Mozart’s Sister. It seems the prodigious musician had a gifted older sister, although she never reached the heights of baby brother. The reason we never heard of Nannerl Mozart, ostensibly, was that women could not have careers or, you know, earn respect. That theme is not unfamiliar, so outside of the revelation that Mozart had a talented sister, the film doesn’t break a lot of new ground. There’s a little nepotism on display, too: Director René Féret casts his daughter Marie as Nannerl, and his daughter Lisa as her best friend. Neither offers a lot of depth. But if you like the era and are intrigued by the setup, the film is great to look at. Boyd THE MUPPETS

Co-writer and actor Jason Segel, with help from director James Bobin, reboots the Muppets franchise with great success. Segel, Bobin and co-writer Nicholas Stoller have gone back to the Muppets’ roots, drawing energy from the 1970s TV show. Segel plays Gary, a happy-go-lucky guy planning a trip to Los Angeles, where he will ask his girlfriend, Mary (Amy Adams), to marry him. He also plans to bring along his beloved brother, Walter … who is a Muppet. Walter has never met the likes of Kermit, Miss Piggy or Fozzie, but he idolizes them and hopes to meet them at Muppet Studios. They arrive—only to find the studios deserted. They seek out the Muppets, get them back together, and put on a show to save the studios from an evil oil baron (Chris Cooper). There’s fun music and good Muppet humor—and great to see Kermit plucking his banjo again. Grimm MY WEEK WITH MARILYN

No matter how often the word “icon” is thrown around, there have been few true icons—people whose fame actually shifts the world around it. One true icon is Marilyn Monroe. In My Week With Marilyn, Michelle Williams does not play into that iconography. She creates the Monroe underneath—a self-conscious, self-pitying child. That’s largely accurate, and since vulnerability is one characteristic Williams usually brings to her roles, it makes her performance here the one for which she’ll be remembered. The film chronicles the production of The Prince and the Showgirl, which Monroe made with an increasingly exasperated Laurence Olivier (a scene-stealing Kenneth Branagh). Colin Clark (Eddie Redmayne) is the assistant assigned to chaperone the starlet, and the action is seen through his eyes. Williams’ performance stands as one of the best all year. Boyd PUSS IN BOOTS

In this prequel to the Shrek films, Puss (the voice of Antonio Banderas) is out to clear his name after accidentally helping old friend Humpty Dumpty (Zach Galifianakis) with a crime in their hometown. Humpty and Kitty Softpaws (Salma Hayek) come to Puss with an idea that can help him; however, everything is not quite as it seems. Filled to the brim with animated kitties, this movie may just be the mostadorable damn thing ever. The original idea was for this to be a direct-to-DVD release, and the story feels a bit rushed, but when there are tons of cute animals and some really great adult-themed jokes, who cares? It’s extremely entertaining. Allen THE SKIN I LIVE IN

It takes a wild, sharp left turn halfway through, but Pedro Almodóvar’s The Skin I Live In is one of his more complete and entertaining oddities in a long time. Per usual, the legendary Spanish filmmaker takes a unique look at sexuality, this time through a stylish thriller involving a surgeon (Antonio Banderas) who creates a synthetic skin for one of his patients. But why does she suddenly look so much like the surgeon’s late wife, and why is she being kept as something of a prisoner? Just who is this woman? The actress portraying the mystery patient is Elena Ayana, and even though Banderas is strong in his long-overdue reunion with Almodóvar, she is the glue (or maybe the sutures) that holds together The Skin I Live In. Boyd

DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2011

TuCsONWEEKLY

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CHOW Brio Tuscan Grille offers decent-enough chain fare

NOSHING AROUND BY ADAM BOROWITZ noshing@tucsonweekly.com

Mall Italian

Buy This Soup Every once in a while, a project comes along that tugs at these weathered heart strings: Several women have banded together to establish a local shelter for homeless women, and they’re selling soup and brownie mixes to raise money for the effort. Annie O’Connor says she has black-bean chili; multi-bean soup; and Southwestern brownie mix made with cinnamon and hot chiles. Each mix sells for $5. Put some food in your pantry and a roof over the heads of some of Tucson’s less-fortunate women by calling 749-1021 to place an order.

BY RENÉE DOWNING, rdowning@tucsonweekly.com

D

36 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

decided on the bruschetta quattro ($14.95) to start. It was two pieces each of four types of bruschetta, topped with roasted red pepper; roasted tomato and ricotta; sliced steak; and prosciutto, respectively. Each of these, to my mind, involved too many ingredients. Asparagus really does nothing for prosciutto, and they all were tarted up with melty cheese and balsamic “drizzle,” which had the effect of making them sweet. Basically, it was bar food—made with lots of fat to soak up alcohol and lots of salt to stimulate thirst, and cloying after a bite or two. Next, we split a Brio chopped salad ($4.95), not because we’re cheap, but so we didn’t get too full to enjoy our entrées and desserts, which was already a possibility after those bruschette. We asked for the salad dry, with oil and vinegar on the side—but it came dressed with a good vinaigrette, which is probably the only way it comes. It was pretty fantastic—a perfectly balanced mixture of lettuce, tomatoes, cukes, olives, red onion and feta, all icy cold, crunchy and chopped fine to be easy to tuck in to. We loved it. Up to that point, the service had been topnotch, but after the salad came a lull. This was OK. We had lots to talk about, and I was on my second glass of Castello di Meleto ($12.25 on special, and worth every penny), but we did begin to wonder what had happened to our entrées. If we’d been, say, a bored, older restaurant-going couple, we might have gotten restless. But just about the time we began to notice the hiatus, a manager came by to tell us that Kathy’s crab and shrimp cakes were “still coming up to temperature,” and that it would be a few more minutes. We appreciated his attentiveness and the ETA, yet we couldn’t help speculating. Clearly, the cakes had been very cold. Did that mean they’d been frozen? Well, probably, and that was fine, except that it normally never would have occurred to us to think about whether they’d been manufactured someplace else. And were the cakes actually defying the laws of physics—stubbornly refusing to be heated up—or had our waiter or someone in the kitchen screwed up? When our entrées finally arrived, the three very nice seafood cakes ($22.95) were succulent, nicely seasoned, packed with shrimp and crab— and piping-hot. Kathy was delighted with them and with the pool of horseradish sauce, the heap of al dente vegetables and the crispy roasted potato pieces that came alongside. Barbara’s grilled shrimp and orzo ($19.95) was another unqualified success: Big, juicy, very spicy shrimp were served on a bed of nicely cooked orzo and accompanied by grilled vegetables. She polished it all off. I was less happy with my penne

New: Catalina Brewing Company

TIM GLASS

riving west across town on River Road in the dark, Tucson doesn’t seem all that different from what it was 35 years ago. But once you turn south on First Avenue and then west on Wetmore Road, the traffic gets more frantic and the signs brighter as you approach Tucson Mall—and the chain restaurants multiply thick and fast. Count ’em: Boston Market, Domino’s, Carl’s Jr., Applebee’s, Taco Bell, Starbucks, Sweet Tomatoes, California Pizza Kitchen, Cheesecake Factory (the mere name explains a lot about the U.S. obesity rate), Olive Garden, Mimi’s, Red Robin, Chipotle Mexican Grill and Cold Stone Creamery. Brio Tuscan Grille, a 40-strong chain out of Ohio, landed near the epicenter of this dense brand-name gastronomic cluster last summer. It occupies a big, handsome building next to REI, across the way from Cheesecake Factory and just a hop, skip and a jump from Olive Garden—of which it is basically a higher-class version. Like Olive Garden, Brio serves up an Americanized version of central Italian food in an American fantasy of what Italy might be like—except for the three giant-screen TVs that dominate the otherwise-beautiful bar at one end of the room. (I have to say, there’s something about the combination of fine dining and ESPN that just doesn’t click for me.) But this sort of thing is probably exactly what it takes to propagate a successful Italianrestaurant concept in a world where appetites are attuned to stuffed-crust pizzas, and every bar is a sports bar. Despite the TVs and that chi-chi final “e” in “Grille,” Brio has its points. The staff is warm and attentive; the big room is opulently and pleasantly decorated; and the place is comfortable and not too noisy. Most of the food is quite tasty, and some of the things that really count—the bread, the salads—are terrific. But the general style tends to be complicated and over-rich in a way that’s more about Columbus, Ohio, than Firenze. And, for better or worse, it’s at Tucson Mall. In other words, Vivace has nothing to worry about. I arrived with my friends Barbara and Kathy on a freezing Tuesday night and was happy to see the place bustling with folks who were clearly having a good time. Our waiter was sweet and very young. He couldn’t recommend a Chianti, not having tasted them—but was patient with our dithering over the menu. As we tried not to fill up on the excellent housemade bread (featuring a fresh, chewy interior with a shattering crust) and super-excellent rosemary-parmesan crispy cracker bread, we

The grilled shrimp and orzo at Brio.

Brio Tuscan Grille 150 W. Wetmore Road 887-2388; www.brioitalian.com/Tucson Open Sunday through Thursday, 11 a.m. to 10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday, 11 a.m. to 11 p.m. Pluses: Tasty breads; fantastic chopped salad Minuses: Service lull; cloying bruschetta sampler

Mediterranean ($16.35)—pasta with mushrooms, spinach, sun-dried tomatoes, caramelized onions, feta and pine nuts. It turned out to be bland and rather greasy, so I ended up picking out the vegetables and pine nuts and leaving most of the penne. We finished up with three “dolchinos” picked from the sampler tray of intelligently portioned desserts ($2.95 each)—tiramisu, apple crostada and mascarpone cake. They were all fine; the last was our favorite. We asked one another at the end of the evening: Would we return? Probably not. We’d really loved the breads and salad, but those weren’t special enough for us to brave the mall traffic again. Of course, not being real meateaters, we couldn’t try any of the large selection of steaks, which may be wonderful. Barbara did sample the sliced steak bruschetta. She found the beef to be good, but said the whole thing was off-puttingly sweet due to the drizzle and some caramelized onions. “Besides,” she concluded, “I had to park all the way over by Sears.”

If you like bikes or beer, or both, check out the new Catalina Brewing Company. The outfit is run by a couple of guys who share a passion for cycling and brewing, and their plan is to represent both of those interests in every bottle. Co-owner Hank Rowe says two or three different beers will initially be produced, and that they will eventually add other flavors, such as a signature brew for the annual 24 Hours in the Old Pueblo mountain-bike race. The brewery is located at a private residence, but the plan is to eventually move it to a spot that can accommodate larger-scale production and maybe even a tasting room. Check in at www.catalinabrewingco.com.

New Gelato A new gelato and sorbet store called Tazzina di Gelato has opened at 5420 E. Broadway Blvd., No. 234. The owners take the frozen stuff seriously and traveled to Bologna, Italy, to attend Gelato University at Carpigiani before returning home and crisscrossing the country to further hone their skills. The result is a menu of flavors ranging from chipotle-chocolate to strawberry-champagne, not to mention some fantastic holiday flavors. Visit www.tazzinadigelato.com for more information.

Tea Time Did you know there are flavors hidden in the leaves of green tea that are so foreign to the American palate that we don’t even have words to describe them? Little facts like this make learning about green tea an adventure, and we’re fortunate to have Seven Cups Fine Chinese Teas (2516 E. Sixth St.) to help us along. The tea shop offers classes from 6 to 7 p.m. on Thursdays. A certified tea master speaks about the culture, health benefits and history of China’s green teas. The classes are $15, and you don’t need a reservation; 881-4072; www.sevencups.com.


CHOW SCAN Chow Scan is the Weekly’s selective guide to Tucson restaurants. Only restaurants that our reviewers recommend are included. Complete reviews are online at www.tucsonweekly.com. Dates of reviews from August 1999 to the present are included in Chow Scan. Send comments and updates to: mailbag@ tucsonweekly.com; fax to 792-2096; mail to Chow, P.O. Box 27087, Tucson, AZ 85726. These listings have no connection with Weekly advertising.

KEY PRICE RANGES $ $8 or less $ $ $8-$15 $ $ $ $15-$25 $ $ $ $ $25 and up. Prices are based on menu entrée selections, and exclude alcoholic beverages. FORMS OF PAYMENT V Visa MC Mastercard AMEX American Express DIS Discover DC Diner’s Club checks local checks with guarantee card and ID only debit debit cards CatCard University of Arizona CatCard. TYPE OF SERVICE Counter Quick or fast-food service, usually includes take-out. Diner Minimal table service. Café Your server is most likely working solo. Bistro Professional servers, with assistants bussing tables. Full Cover Multiple servers, with the table likely well set. Full Bar Separate bar space for drinks before and after dinner.

town spot is a joy. Lunches are affordable and offer sandwiches, soups, salads and pastas. Dinner offers a full menu of Italian staples and house specialties. The patio at night is a great spot to enjoy downtown at its finest. The wine list is intensely Italian but has a price range for every pocket. Desserts and breakfasts also sing of Italy. (10-5-06) $$-$$$ CAFFE TORINO NW 10325 N. La Canada Drive, No. 151. 297-3777. Open Monday 8 a.m.-2 p.m.; Tuesday-Friday 8 a.m.-2 p.m. and 5-9 p.m.; Saturday 7:30 a.m.-2 p.m. and 5-9 p.m.; Sunday 7:30 a.m.-1 p.m. and 4-8 p.m. Café/ Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Caffe Torino serves gigantic, shareable portions of beautifully executed entrées. Flavors are authentic, and the menu offers a wide range of options. A well-thought-out wine list and a beautifully decorated space complete the experience—but don’t expect a quick meal. (4-21-11) $$-$$$

G I V E A G I F T.

G E T A G I F T.

CARUSO’S C 434 N. Fourth Ave. 624-5765. Open Tuesday-

Thursday and Sunday 11:30 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11:30 a.m.-11 p.m. Café/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Caruso’s has been around since 1938, and based on the crowds the restaurant draws on the weekends, it’ll be around beyond 2038. The service is warm and friendly while the food is inexpensive and satisfying. Caruso’s patio seating offers a special dining experience. (7-17-03) $-$$ DOLCE VITA E 7895 E. Broadway Blvd. 298-3700. Open MondayFriday 11:30 a.m.-10 p.m.; Saturday and Sunday 4-10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Spaghetti and meatballs is a surefire hit here, as are the pizza and eggplant parmigiana. $$-$$$ ENOTECA PIZZERIA WINE BAR C 58 W. Congress St. 623-0744. Open TuesdayThursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Saturday 4-10 p.m. Bistro/Beer and Wine. AMEX, MC, V. Enoteca is a busy restaurant with delicious pastas, salads, pizzas and dinner entrées and more. The food is consistently tasty and reasonably priced. (5-12-05) $-$$ GIACOMO’S NE 6878 E. Sunrise Drive. 529-7358. Open TuesdaySunday 4:30-9:30 p.m. Summer hours: ThursdaySunday 5-9:30 p.m. Café. Beer, Wine and Specialty Drinks. AMEX, MC, V. Pictures of Italy’s coastline adorn this Italian restaurant with a cozy authentic atmosphere. Friendly service, delicious food and reasonable prices make Giacomo’s a place to find amore. (12-18-03) $$-$$$

PURCHA SE $100 WORTH OF GIF T CARDS. GE T A $20 GIF T CARD IN RE TURN. Available at all FRC Restaurants, w w w.foxrc.com or by calling 480.905.6920. November 1st through December 31st.

F OX r e s t aur a nt co n ce p t s

J. MARINARA’S NW 8195 N. Oracle Road. 989-3654. Open Tuesday-

RESTAURANT LOCATION C Central North to River Road, east to Alvernon Way, west to

Granada Avenue downtown, and south to 22nd Street. NW Northwest North of River Road, west of Campbell

Avenue. NE Northeast North of River Road, east of Campbell

Avenue. E East East of Alvernon Way, south of River Road.

Saturday 11 a.m.-2 p.m. and 3:30-8:30 p.m.; Sunday 3:30-8:30 p.m. Café/Full Bar. MC, V. Brought to you by the folks who ran Ascolese’s, this East Coast Italian joint cooks up all of the usual Italian favorites. Steaks are also available, and on Sunday, you’ll find prime rib. At dinner, the atmosphere is warm and friendly, like a restaurant you’d find back in the old neighborhood. If you dig the marinara sauce, you can purchase a jar to take home. (5-26-11) $-$$$ LUNA BELLA ITALIAN CUISINE AND CATERING

S South South of 22nd Street.

E 2990 N. Swan Road, No. 145. 325-3895. Open

W West West of Granada Avenue, south of River Road.

Monday-Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday 10 a.m.-9 p.m. Full Cover/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. The service is friendly and professional, and the food is largely fantastic; you can’t go wrong with the veal osso bucco and the shrimp linguine. For a livelier, more casual experience, check out the bar, where TVs tuned to sports and happy-hour specials await hungry diners. (2-19-09) $$$-$$$$

ITALIAN AMERENO’S LITTLE ITALY C 2933 E. Grant Road. 721-1210. Open Tuesday-Friday 11 a.m.-2 p.m.; Tuesday-Saturday 5-10 p.m.; Sunday 4:30-9:30 p.m. Bistro/Wine Only. MC, V. Amereno’s offers a wide but not unwieldy menu of traditional Italian fare, and an attractive atmosphere. The dishes haven’t achieved a consistent quality, but nothing is poor, and many items, including the calamari, are quite good. (1-22-09) $$-$$$ BAZIL’S NE 4777 E. Sunrise Drive. 577-3322. Open daily 5-9

p.m. Full Cover/Full Bar. AMEX, MC, V. This foothills favorite has been serving up plenty of great Italian and Continental cuisine for more than 25 years. A dizzying array of choices, huge portions and friendly service add up to a more-than-pleasant dining experience. The cioppino is outstanding. You won’t walk away hungry. (7-15-04) $$-$$$ CAFFE MILANO C 46 W. Congress St. 628-1601. Open Monday-

Wednesday 8:30 a.m.-3 p.m.; Thursday and Friday 8:30 a.m.-3 p.m. and 5:30-9:30 p.m.; Saturday 5:30-9:30 p.m. Café/Counter/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Whether it’s by weekday or weekend night, this down-

MAMA LOUISA’S ITALIAN RESTAURANT S 2041 S. Craycroft Road. 790-4702. Open MondayThursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday noon-8 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. It’s hard to find anything wrong with Mama Louisa’s, a Tucson treasure since 1956. The food’s amazing; the service is superb; the prices are reasonable. There’s a large menu for both lunch and dinner, with plenty of vegetarian options. Try Joe’s Special; it’s the signature dish for a reason. (3-20-03) $-$$ MICHELANGELO RISTORANTE ITALIANO NW 420 W. Magee Road. 297-5775. Open MondayThursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.10 p.m. Café/Full Bar. AMEX, MC, V. A popular northwest side venue, Michelangelo’s is sure to please if you temper your expectations with a note of realism--that note being this is Tucson, and good, authentic Italian fare is very hard to find. (5-2-02) $-$$ NORTH NW 2995 E. Skyline Drive. 299-1600. Open Monday-

Thursday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11

CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2011

TuCsONWEEKLY

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ROMA IMPORTS C 627 S. Vine Ave. 792-3173. Open Monday-Friday 9-6 p.m.; Saturday 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Summer hours: MondaySaturday 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Counter/No Alcohol. MC, V. Despite its odd location, Roma Imports manages to draw a crowd. Why? Its food rocks. The sandwiches and pasta specials are almost perfect for a causal meal to eat at La Taverna, Romaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s in-house dining area. If you want some prepared goodies to take home, or are looking for the perfect ingredients to make your own Italian meal, you canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t fail. And the desserts are amazing, too. (3-8-07) $

Roasted chili poblano, carne molido en nogada with toasted pine nuts, queso requison in a pinole crust. Served with citrus salad. Closed Christmas Day Happy Holidays from Us All

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ITALIAN

a.m.-11 p.m.; Sunday noon-9 p.m. Full Cover/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. La Encantada has itself a gem in NoRTH, brought to you to the folks behind Wildflower and Zinburger. The pastas, fish and pizzas are all tasty, if a bit pricey, but the view pushes NoRTH over the top. (2-26-04) $$$-$$$$

Mon - Sat 6am -2pm Sunday 7am - 1 pm

14INW. GRANT RD â&#x20AC;˘ 623-7976 THE GRANTSTONE PLAZA 81'(51(:2:1(56+,3

TAVOLINO RISTORANTE ITALIANO NW 2890 E. Skyline Drive. 531-1913. Open MondayThursday 11 a.m.-3 p.m. and 5-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-3 p.m. and 5-11 p.m. Full Cover/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Tavolino is now a shiny, chic kind of placeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and it didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t miss a beat in the move. The appetizers are fresh and fabulous. The pastas will delight. (Try the tagliatelle alla Bolognese; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s killer.) Other entrĂŠes, especially those coming off the grill, are great examples of how Italian food is supposed to be. Service is most professional. (8-12-10) $$-$$$ TRATTORIA PINA NE 5541 N. Swan Road. 577-6992. Open Monday-

Friday 11:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m. and 5-10 p.m.; Saturday 4:30-10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, MC, V. Some individual dishes shine, but others would do well to be avoided. If you order carefully and bring the right company, the spectacular mountain views can seduce you into a moment of sheer well-being. (11-30-00) $-$$

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VERONA ITALIAN RESTAURANT E 120 S. Houghton Road. 722-2722. Open TuesdaySaturday 4-9 p.m.; Sunday 10 a.m.-1 p.m. and 4-9 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V, Checks. With more than four dozen entrĂŠes to choose from, there are options aplenty at Verona. The portion sizes are huge, too. And the taste? Our veal Florentine and chicken picatta were divine, as were the desserts. The far eastside has itself a winner. (11-6-03) $$-$$$ VIROâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S ITALIAN BAKERY AND CAFE E 8301 E. 22nd St. 885-4045. Open Tuesday and Wednesday 9 a.m.-6 p.m.; Thursday and Friday 9 a.m.8 p.m.; Saturday 9 a.m.-5 p.m.; Sunday 8 a.m.-3 p.m. Counter/Beer and Wine. MC, V, Checks. This charming little Italian joint serves up meaty sandwiches, fresh breads and pastries, pizzas and a handful of pasta dishes, along with impressive daily specialsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;-including a Sunday breakfast buffet that may be one of the best brunch deals in town. (10-25-07) $-$$ VITELLOâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S RISTORANTE ITALIANO NW 15930 N. Oracle Road, No. 178. 825-0140. Open Monday 4-8 p.m.; Tuesday-Thursday and Sunday 11 a.m.-8 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-9 p.m. CafĂŠ/ Beer and Wine. DIS, MC, V. What a pleasant surprise Vitelloâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cozy; the staff is friendly; and the menu has just about everything Italian you might crave. The sauces range from a house marinara to a creamy vodka to a rich gorgonzola to a briny white clam. The pizzas are also quite good; theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re simple and rustic. Panini, salads, veal, chicken, seafood and dishes are also available. The cannoli is like Nana used to make. (1-13-11) $-$$$ VIVACE C 4310 N. Campbell Ave. 795-7221. Open MondayThursday 11:30 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11:30 a.m.-10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, MC, V. If thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s something Vivace doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t do well, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve never been able to discover what it is. Lots of innovative pasta dishes, grilled meats and fresh seafood distinguish the menu, along with salads, appetizers and desserts to die for. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a bustling bistro that deserves its ongoing popularity. (4-26-01) $$-$$$ ZONA 78 NW 78 W. River Road. 888-7878. Open daily 11 a.m.10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Also at 7301 E. Tanque Verde Road (296-7878). Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s casual; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cool; and the food makes the most of many fine Italian items (goodies from Willcox and Australia are also a big part of the scene). The bar is a great place to hang out while you enjoy one of the many wines or house specialty drinks. The pizzas are stone-fired with great combos, or you can build your own. This is definitely a place to be a regular. (7-6-06) $$

JAMAICAN CEEDEE JAMAICAN KITCHEN E 1070 N. Swan Road. 795-3400. Open TuesdaySunday 11 a.m.-9 p.m. Counter/No Alcohol. AMEX, MC, V. Yes, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll find jerk chicken here (and oh, what heavenly jerk it is), but there are plenty of other island specialties to choose from as well: curry chicken, oxtails, plantains and more. The side called festival is like a hush puppy, only bigger and better. Desserts are unusual but tasty; the cold drinks refresh. Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bob Marley music, and the staff is friendly. The only thing missing here is the beach. (10-21-10) $-$$

KOREAN KOREA HOUSE E 4030 E. Speedway Blvd. 325-4377. Open MondayThursday 11 a.m.-9:30 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday 4:30-9:30 p.m. Diner/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Bulgoki of fire and flavor, and mouth-watering grilled beef ribs, Korean-style. Good noodle soups, also. $-$$ SEOUL KITCHEN E 4951 E. Grant Road. 881-7777. Open MondayThursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-9:30 p.m. Bistro/Beer and Wine. AMEX, MC, V. Seoul Kitchen dishes up quick, affordable and authentic Korean food with a smile. The crab puffs are a canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;tmiss item, and be prepared to be overwhelmed with tasty side dishes and banchan plates. Portions are generous, and the food is delicious; you definitely wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t leave hungry. (2-11-10) $-$$

LATIN AMERICAN

TUCSON TAMALE COMPANY C 2545 E. Broadway Blvd. 305-4760. Open Monday 10 a.m.-5 p.m.; Tuesday-Friday 10 a.m.-7 p.m.; Saturday 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Counter/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. The Tucson Tamale Company offers a great origin story: Intuit executive decides to follow a dream by starting a tamale business in the middle of a heinous economy. The Tucson Tamale Company also offers some delicious food: Try the Santa Fe tamale, with pork loin, green chiles, cheddar, tomatoes and garlic. Vegans and those with gluten allergies have plenty to eat here, as the masa is gluten-free. Get a dozen tamales to go; they reheat easily and quickly in the microwave. (3-12-09) $

MARKET EUROPEAN MARKET AND DELI E 4500 E. Speedway Blvd., No. 36. 512-0206. Open Monday-Saturday 9 a.m.-8 p.m.; Sunday 9 a.m.-3 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. DIS, MC, V. A smattering of EasternEuropean beers, wines, sweets, liquors and other groceries makes this market/deli unique. Fast, friendly service and tasty classics round out the menu along with a wide selection of deli meats and cheeses. (1-29-09) $ LEE LEE ORIENTAL SUPERMARKET NW 1990 W. Orange Grove Road. 638-8328. Open

daily 9 a.m.-9 p.m. Lee Lee Oriental Supermarket is far more than an average grocery store. With thousands of products that span the globe, along with fresh produce, meats and seafood, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re sure to discover some new favorites. Thuan Kieu Vietnamese restaurant (open daily, 10:30 a.m. to 8:30 p.m., cafĂŠ) has an extensive selection with really fresh, tasty ingredients, and Nan Tian BBQ (open Wednesday through Monday, 10:30 a.m. to 7:30 p.m., counter) serves up all kinds of barbecued delicacies, from chicken and duck feet to whole roasted suckling pigs. (5-6-10) RINCON MARKET C 2513 E. Sixth St. 327-6653. Open Monday-Friday 7

CONTIGO COCINA LATINA NW 1745 E. River Road. 299-1730. Open MondaySaturday 5-10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Contigo adds a touch of class and chic to Tucsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s restaurant scene with delicious Spanish, South and Central American-inspired dishes and inventive cocktails. Serving up twists on classics from these regions, Contigo puts a focus on sustainably sourced ingredients. With lots of seafood and vegetarian options, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s something for every palate. (8-19-10) $$$

a.m.-9 p.m.; Saturday 7 a.m.-8 p.m.; Sunday 8 a.m.-8 p.m. Counter/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V, Checks. Open as a neighborhood market since 1926, Rincon Market today is known for its wide variety of fresh, inexpensive foods. In the dining area, there are options aplenty: deli sandwiches, a large salad bar, a grill, baked goods, coffees, rotisserie chicken and more. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s an iconic Tucson place to grab a quick, simple, delicious meal. (7-14-05) $

DON PEDROâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S PERUVIAN BISTRO S 3386 S. Sixth Ave. 209-1740. Open MondaySaturday 10:30 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sunday 10:30 a.m.-6 p.m. Bistro/No Alcohol. DIS, MC, V. Don Pedroâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, a transplant from Rocky Point, Sonora, is one of the latest additions to the growing Peruvian-cuisine scene in Tucson. With mild flavors and quick, friendly service, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a tasty vacation for your palate from the sea of southside Mexican-food restaurants. (3-3-11) $$

C 444 E. University Blvd. 622-0761. Deli open

TIME MARKET

DOS LOCOS NW Hilton El Conquistador, 10000 N. Oracle Road. 544-5000. Open daily 5-11 p.m. Full Cover/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, MC, V. Dos Locos easily holds its own in the limited local nuevo Latino market. If its dishes lack the unusual imagination of those at, say, CafĂŠ Poca Cosa, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a restaurant that lets you feel a little daring, without really straying too far afield. (12-6-07) $$-$$$ INCAâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S PERUVIAN CUISINE NE 6878 E. Sunrise Drive. 299-1405. Open daily 11

a.m.-9 p.m. Bistro. Beer, Wine and Specialty Drinks. DIS, MC, V and checks. Incaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is the place to go for a twist on the usual meat and potatoes. Warmly decorated with friendly service and delicately spiced food, Incaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s offers dishes that are truly unique. The pollo entero (whole roasted chicken), the ceviche mixto and the pisco sour are canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t-miss hits. Make sure you make a reservation. (4-1-10) $-$$ MAYA QUETZAL C 429 N. Fourth Ave. 622-8207. Open Monday-

Thursday 11:30 a.m.-8:45 p.m.; Friday and Saturday noon-8:45 p.m. Summer hours: Monday-Thursday 11:30 a.m.-2 p.m. and 5-8:30 p.m.; Friday and Saturday noon-8:45 p.m. CafĂŠ. Beer, Wine and Specialty Drinks. MC, V. Nearly magical yet simple taste combinations from the Yucatan and Central America are featured. You can almost taste the green of the tropics in Maya Quetzalâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s vegetable and nut-meat combinations. $ MIGUELâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S NW 5900 N. Oracle Road. 887-3777. Open daily 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Summer hours: Monday-Thursday 3-10 p.m.; Friday-Sunday noon-10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Enjoy regional Mexican dishes in a lovely setting. Plenty of seafood and other entrĂŠes are served up in unique and tasty sauces. A tequila loverâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s heaven with choices aplenty. (10-7-04) $$-$$$

Monday-Saturday 9 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sunday 10 a.m.-8 p.m.; pizza daily 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Counter/Beer and Wine. MC, V. Time Market is four things in one. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a top-notch deli; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a popular woodfire pizza joint; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a coffee bar; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a quirky market full of hard-to-find foods. With a friendly staff and reasonable prices, Time Market is a longtime Tucson favorite. We recommend the green gringo sandwich, mixing a green corn tamale with shredded chicken, cheddar, salsa and green olives on sourdough. Yum! (7-14-05) $-$$

MEXICAN BIRRĂ?A GUADALAJARA C 304 E. 22nd St. 624-8020. Open daily 7 a.m.-8:30 p.m. Counter/Diner/No Alcohol. Cash only. One of the best quick-stop Mexican food venues in town. The carne asada and birrĂ­a burros are standouts. $ BKâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S S 5118 S. 12th Ave. 295-0105. Open Sunday-Thursday

9 a.m.-midnight; Friday and Saturday 9 a.m.-2 a.m. Counter/No Alcohol. MC, V. Also at 2680 N. First Ave. (207-2245). Nothing fancy, nothing grand, just a boatload of some of the best carne asada youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re ever likely to sample. A scrumptious salsa bar with lots of goodies to complement your tacos, quesadillas or caramelos (quesadillas with carne asada) is a delightful bonus, and the Sonoran hot dogs put the usual ballpark fare to shame. $ BLANCO TACOS AND TEQUILA NW 2905 E. Skyline Drive, No. 246. 232-1007. Open Sunday-Thursday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-11 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Another addition to the Fox restaurant empireâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and the second Fox restaurant at La Encantadaâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;is yet another winner. Excellent updated Sonoran food, crackling service, a spectacular view and a hip, young vibe make Blanco worth the foothills prices. (8-30-07) $$$-$$$$ BOCA C 828 E. Speedway Blvd. 777-8134. Open Monday-

Wednesday 10:30 a.m.-midnight; Thursday-Saturday 10:30 a.m.-3 a.m.; Sunday noon-midnight. Counter/ Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Boca offers upscale indoor versions of Tucsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s street food, and is doing tacos the


right way, with lots of flavor and high-quality ingredients. Generous portions and playfully presented food are just the beginning. With a few dozen tequilas at the bar and reasonable prices, Boca is the perfect addition to the university-area restaurant scene. (10-7-10) $-$$ LA BOTANA TACO GRILL AND CANTINA C 3200 N. First Ave. 777-8801. Open Monday-Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday noon-9 p.m. Café. Beer and Margaritas. MC, V. This little “cantina” offers big flavors and lots of fun. Build your own burrito or quesadilla by mixing and matching grilled meats, seafood and an assortment of other goodies. Seafood dishes are done well here, and dining on the patio is reminiscent of Mexican beachside spots. On weekends, margaritas are 2-for-1 all day long. They’re the perfect counter to the heat and smoke from many dishes. (1-21-10) $ LAS BRASAS TAQUERÍA C 2928 E. 22nd St. 881-6077. Open Monday-Thursday

10 a.m.-8 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 10 a.m.-9 p.m. Counter/Beer Only. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Watch your own steak, chicken or tripas de leche sputter on the brazier grill and be deftly placed in a tortilla, taco or torta roll. The sides are fresh and zippy, and the meal’s a deal! $ CAFÉ POCA COSA C 110 E. Pennington St. 622-6400. Open Tuesday-

Thursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. DIS, MC, V. For years, owner Suzana Davila has delighted residents and visitors alike with her Like Water for Chocolate style of Mexican food. The sauces at Café Poca Cosa are extraordinary, reflecting an intricate blend of chiles and spicing as unusual as they are delicious. Pile on the incredible puréed salsa, and try not to miss the mole and pipian. (4-1300) $$-$$$ CASA MOLINA E 6225 E. Speedway Blvd. 886-5468. Open daily 11

a.m.-10 p.m. Bistro/Café/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. Also at 3001 N. Campbell Ave. (795-7593) and 4240 E. Grant Road (326-6663). A family operation with roots tracing back over the last five decades, Casa Molina is one of the most consistent places in town to sample true Mexican food. With an extensive menu that includes tacos, tostadas, enchiladas and chimichangas—as well as fried shrimp and hamburgers for more timid palates—Casa Molina boasts something for every taste. Children are always welcome, and the margaritas are top-flight. (8-12-99) $-$$

Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday 10 a.m.9 p.m. Café/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. Also at 311 N. Court Ave. (622-1922), 7725 N. Oracle Road, Suite 101 (229-1922), 6910 E. Sunrise Road (5141922) and 15920 S. Rancho Sahuarita (325-1922). A Tucson tradition since 1922, El Charro has taken its delectable show on the road with several satellite locations. The food is as fabulous as ever, no matter which establishment you happen to stumble into, especially the unparalleled carne seca and any of the giant chimichangas. $$-$$$ EL CORONADO FAMILY RESTAURANT S 9040 E. Valencia Road, No. 100. 574-7776. Open Monday-Saturday 7 a.m.-9 p.m. Café/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Good Mexican food has come to Rita Ranch! El Coronado serves up tasty stuffed quesadillas, and the chorizo and egg plate is a revelation. The menu includes both Mexican classics like menudo and gringo classics like chicken fried steak. In other words (cliché alert): There’s something for everyone! (4-8-10) $-$$ EL MEZÓN DEL COBRE C 2960 N. First Ave. 791-0977. Open Sunday-Thursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Café/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. If you think you’ve tried them all, check out El Mezón del Cobre’s special brand of Mexican food. The hot-and-spicy huichol shrimp will ignite the taste buds of hot fanatics, and the layered enchiladas bring new meaning and taste to the genre of south-of-the-border cuisine. Delightful cantina atmosphere. $$-$$$

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EL MINUTO CAFÉ C 354 S. Main Ave. 882-4145. Open Sunday-Thursday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-11 p.m. Café/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. El Minuto Café has been serving Tucson some of the best Mexican food around for more than 60 years. The chiles rellenos simply can’t be beat. $-$$ EL PARADOR C 2744 E. Broadway Blvd. 881-2744. Open MondayThursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday 11 a.m.-2 a.m.; Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday 1:30-9 p.m. Bistro/ Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. This longtime Tucson favorite continues to please with one of the city’s most unique dining areas—the main room is an old courtyard that’s now indoors, even though real trees and plants remain. The food’s worth noting, too—some dishes are hit-and-miss, but you’ll always win with the fantastic tableside guacamole. (1-1-04) $$-$$$

CHACO’S CAFE S 2027 S. Craycroft Road. 790-1828. Open Monday-

Saturday 6 a.m.-2 p.m. Café/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Chaco’s Café feels like a small-town Arizona joint, with casual service, red checkered vinyl tablecloths and inexpensive, tasty eats. All of the Mexican standards you’d expect are offered, from green-corn tamales to shrimp fajitas. The salsa bar is a nice touch, and you can entertain yourself by reading all of the wise sayings handwritten on the walls. (7-15-10) $-$$

EL RIO BAKERY W 901 N. Grande Ave. 624-4996. Open MondaySaturday 6 a.m.-7 p.m.; Sunday 6 a.m.-3 p.m. Counter/ No Alcohol. MC, V. El Rio Bakery’s been around for decades, and when you sample their delicious pastries (we particularly like the empanadas), you’ll know why. However, El Rio also offers up other tasty Mexican fare; the soups are especially good. We recommend a steaming-hot bowl of albondigas (meatball) soup. (2-18-10) $

CLUB 21

EL SABROSO OAKWOOD GRILLE

C 2920 N. Oracle Road. 622-3092. Open Sunday and

W 610 N. Grande Ave. 792-2282. Open Monday-

Tuesday-Thursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Café/Full Bar. MC, V. Offering good Mexican food for more than 50 years, this neighborhood favorite should be considered when looking for a cool place to enjoy a margarita or a cold beer. Moderately priced meals make it a nice place for families, too. (4-22-04) $-$$

Thursday 7:15 a.m.-8 p.m.; Friday-Sunday 7:15 a.m.9:30 p.m. Café/Full Bar. MC, V. For a light and flavorful meal, El Sabroso is worth ferreting out. Its use of oak wood to grill meats and vegetables, fruits and fresh seafood puts an interesting twist on what it coins “Mexican Caribbean.” (7-26-01) $-$$

LA COCINA DE GABBY C 4825 N. First Ave. 888-2490. Open Monday-Saturday

9 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sunday 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Café/Full Bar. DIS, MC, V. The food of Mexico City is the highlight at this little mom-and-pop joint; Gabby and Francisco Martinez are the mom and pop. The Mexican food here is a little different than the Sonoran food we’re used to. For example, the chile relleno plate has one stuffed with cheese, and another stuffed with ground beef. The street food of Mexico is represented by the bistec Milanese, which is tenderized, breaded beef. The house salsa stands out due to the hefty flavor of roasted chiles. There is a drive-thru menu, too, offering many of the expected Mexican-food items. (3-24-11) $-$$ CROSSROADS RESTAURANT DRIVE IN S 2602 S. Fourth Ave. 624-0395. Open Sunday-

Thursday 7 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 7 a.m.noon. Café/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. Crossroads has been around for decades, and when you taste the restaurant’s food, you’ll know why. Traditional Mexican fare and seafood dishes primarily featuring shrimp and filet of sole highlight the menu. The service is friendly, and if you’re in a hurry, you can get anything on the menu to go; you can even get a six-pack to take home. (7-24-03) $-$$ EL CHARRO CAFÉ E 6310 E. Broadway Blvd. 745-1922. Open Saturday-

Thursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Summer hours: Monday-Thursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.;

NEW LOCATION on 22nd and Kolb

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EL SUR E 5602 E. 22nd St. 748-1032. Open Monday-Saturday 9 a.m.-9 p.m. Café. Beer and Specialty Drinks. MC, V. This is one of those secret little places that you might not want to share with everybody. Old-fashioned, damn good Mexican fare is served up with a smile. The tortillas are made specially for El Sur and definitely add an extra touch. The décor is funky and down-home, and the servers treat you like family. With prices and flavors that remind of a simpler time, the place attracts a crowd. Try the flan if you have any room for dessert! (12-29-05) $

28 YEARS

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Pancake House FAMILY RESTAURANT

1 egg, bacon, ham or sausage, home fries & toast: $2.49 Mon.-Fri. 2 pancakes, 1 egg & 1 piece of bacon or sausage: $2.49 Mon.-Fri. French toast, 1 egg & 2 pieces of bacon or sausage: $3.49 Mon.-Fri. Lunch Special Mon.-Fri. $4.95 Mon.-Fri.

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LA FRESITA W 1450 W. St. Mary’s Road. 622-4005. Open daily 6 a.m.-11:30 p.m. Counter/No Alcohol. DC, DIS, MC, V. More than just a friendly neighborhood taqueria, La Fresita offers full plates of goodies such as steak ranchero, chiles, tacos, burros, quesadillas and more. The corn tortillas are homemade and served up fresh and hot every day. The fruit shakes are sweet and delicious. With breakfast, lunch and dinner on the menu, La Fresita has literally something for everybody, even gringos! Hamburgers are on the menu. (10-6-05) $

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LA FUENTE C 1749 N. Oracle Road. 623-8659. Open Sunday-

Friday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Saturday noon-10 p.m. Bistro/ Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. Take a fresh look at this Tucson classic. With tasty Mexican-food classics like chiles rellenos and unexpected surprises like fried red snapper, La Fuente is definitely worth a visit if you

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MEXICAN

generally worth the wait—particularly if you’re looking for a great chile relleño. $

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haven’t been in a while. A nice tequila and margarita selection is also offered. (5-27-10) $$-$$$ GUADALAJARA GRILL C 1220 E. Prince Road. 323-1022. Open daily 10 a.m.-10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Also at 750 N. Kolb Road (296-1122). Salsa is made tableside, and the customer is in charge of what goes into it. The chips are fresh, hot and endless, but leave room for what comes next. Every dish is redolent with distinct and finely tuned flavors. (10-21-04) $$-$$$ LA INDITA C 622 N. Fourth Ave. 792-0523. Open Monday-Friday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Saturday 11 a.m.-4 p.m. and 6-9 p.m.; Sunday 9 a.m.-9 p.m. Diner/Beer and Wine. DIS, MC, V. La Indita’s menu shows its Michoacan Tarascan Indian heritage. Menu items like the Tarascan tacos and Indian fry bread make La Indita a continued favorite. $ LEO’S MEXICAN RESTAURANT E 5114 E. Speedway Blvd. 325-9180. Open MondaySaturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Café/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Leo’s may be one of the city’s best-kept secrets. You’ll find such delicious standards as cheese enchiladas, flautas and burros, along with treats like mole and fish tacos. There are vegetarian specialties and a kids’ menu as well. The house margarita also is a winner. Finish off your meal with those airy puffs of fried dough: sopapillas. (11-22-07) $-$$ LUPITA’S CAFE NW 7077 N. Thornydale Road. 744-7505. Open Monday-Friday 9 a.m.-9 p.m.; Saturday 7 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sunday, 7 a.m.-4 p.m. Café. Beer, Wine and Margaritas. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Lupita’s Cafe brings a little southside flavor to the northwest with authentic, affordable Mexican fare. Friendly service and a bright, colorful atmosphere make this cozy café a great dining experience, and the Sonoran hot dogs are among the best in town. Breakfast is served all day, and don’t miss out on the expertly cooked menudo on Saturdays and Sundays. (6-17-10) $-$$ MAICO C 835 E. 22nd St. 294-2836. Open Monday-Saturday

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6 a.m.-11 p.m.; Sunday 6 a.m.-8 p.m. Counter/No Alcohol. MC, V. One could easily miss Maico, situated along busy 22nd Street. We’re glad we didn’t. Tiny as it may be, Maico serves some excellent Mexican chow for diners to enjoy in its outside dining area. Maico has a way with beef, chicken, pork and fish. You’ll find all the usual taqueria items and friendly service. (11-13-08) $ MARIA’S CAFÉ S 3530 S. Sixth Ave. 620-1465. Open TuesdaySaturday 10 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday 9 a.m.-9 p.m. Café/ Beer and Wine. AMEX, DC, MC, V. Quality Mexican food and tableside pay television sets—what more is there to say? In operation for a quarter of a century, Maria’s satisfies on a variety of levels. $-$$ MARISCOS CHIHUAHUA S 3901 S. Sixth Ave. 741-0361. Open daily 9 a.m.-9 p.m. Diner/Beer Only. AMEX, DIS, MC, V, Cash and checks. Also at 1009 N. Grande Ave. (623-3563), 2902 E. 22nd St. (326-1529), 999 N. Swan Road (881-2372), 356 E. Grant Road (884-3457), 435 W. Irvington Road (294-3194) and 4185 W. Ina Road (572-2523). Alcohol served varies per location. A bit of the Mexican seaside has found its way north. At Mariscos Chihuahua, shellfish reigns supreme with fresh Guaymas shrimp being the specialty of the house. Don’t miss the shrimp ceviche, a Mariscos favorite that has regulars coming back for more. $-$$ MARTIN’S COMIDA CHINGONA C 555 N. Fourth Ave. 884-7909. Open MondaySaturday 10:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m. and 5:30-10:30 p.m.; Sunday 10 a.m.-3 p.m. Café/BYO. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V and checks. Martin’s fits the Fourth Avenue vibe perfectly: It’s fun; it’s casual; it’s independent; and the food’s pretty darned good. The huevos rancheros—with a surprising number of delicious vegetables—is excellent, and the carne asada has a rich, smoky flavor. Just don’t ask for guacamole or sour cream. (9-23-10) $-$$ MARY’S LUCKY DOLLAR MARKET S 1555 S. 10th Ave. 884-8720. Open Monday-Friday 6 a.m.-1 p.m. Café/No Alcohol. Cash. Mary’s is one of Tucson’s least-refined restaurants, but the insanely cheap, flavorful food keeps locals a-comin’. The chorizo is the house specialty; alongside some eggs, potatoes and refried beans, it’s pure deliciousness. (2-18-10) $ MI NIDITO S 1813 S. Fourth Ave. 622-5081. Open Sunday, Wednesday and Thursday 11 a.m.-10:30 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-2 a.m. Diner. Beer, Wine and Margaritas. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Another of the perennial Tucson favorites, with consistently good food and service

MICHA’S S 2908 S. Fourth Ave. 623-5307. Open Sunday 7 a.m.8 p.m.; Monday 6:30 a.m.-3 p.m.; Tuesday-Thursday 6:30 a.m.-8 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 6:30 a.m.-9 p.m. Diner/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. One of the perennial favorites among local Mexican food aficionados. The chorizos are made on site, and the chimis are crisp and full. $-$$ LA OLLA NW 8553 N. Silverbell Road, No. 102. 579-0950. Open Monday-Thursday 11:30 a.m.-8 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11:30 a.m.-9 p.m. Café. Beer, Wine and Specialty Drinks. AMEX, MC, V. While chains dominate in Marana, La Olla is a wonderful mom-and-pop place with a Mexican bent. You’ll find all the traditional stuff—enchiladas, tacos, chimis—along with some surprisingly creative items, from appetizers to desserts. For starters, try the empanadas: tiny pies filled with cilantro pesto, shrimp chile and manchego cheese. Entreés include a breaded pork tenderloin topped with garlic shrimp and chipotle crema. (5-28-09) $$ LA PARRILLA SUIZA C 2720 N. Oracle Road. 624-4300. Open Sunday-

Thursday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-11 p.m. Diner/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. Also at 5602 E. Speedway Blvd. (747-4838) and 4250 W. Ina Road (572-7200). Friendly service, delicious food and a large menu. What more could one ask for? Try the chimichanga; you will not regret it. (2-20-03) $$-$$$ PERFECTO’S MEXICAN RESTAURANT S 5404 S. 12th Ave. 889-5651. Open MondayWednesday 8 a.m.-7 p.m.; Thursday-Saturday 7 a.m.-7 p.m.; Sunday 7 a.m.-5 p.m. Café/No Alcohol. DIS, MC, V. This homey little spot attracts a crowd. Perfecto’s serves all the usual stuff, and there is truly something for everybody. Kids will enjoy a burro and french fries; grown-ups will enjoy luscious soups, fresh seafood and homemade desserts. A Sunday buffet attracts a huge crowd, and the house-made choco flan is unique and tasty. (12-10-09) $-$$ LA PLACITA CAFÉ E 2950 N. Swan Road, No. 131. 881-1150. Open Monday-Saturday 11 a.m.-2 p.m. and 5-9 p.m.; Sunday 5-9 p.m. Full Cover. Beer, Wine and Specialty Drinks. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. The official Mexican restaurant of the Old Fort Lowell Neighborhood, La Placita Café, tucked away in Plaza Palomino, serves up consistently good, lard-free Sonoran and Oaxacan food in nearsecret. Divine chile rellenos, sopa de mariscos and delicious mole are among the standouts on the large menu. Nice folks, too. (4-26-07) $$-$$$ QUESADILLA’S GRILL C 110 S. Church Ave., Suite 7136. 798-3697. Open Monday-Friday 8 a.m.-2 p.m. Counter/No Alcohol. DC, DIS, MC, V. The menu features standard tacos, enchiladas and tostadas. The breakfast burritos are especially worth checking out, featuring an “assemble-your-own” list of ingredients that makes breakfast worth getting up for. (3-1-01) $

Although not as flashy as some of its competitors on the Tucson Mexican food scene, Pico de Gallo has nevertheless been serving up outstanding fare for years. Ceviche, birria, fresh fruit cocktail and a carne asada to die for are just a few of the treats to savor when visiting this gem of a restaurant. $ TEQUILA FACTORY S 5655 W. Valencia Road, inside Casino del Sol. (800) 344-9435. Open Monday-Thursday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-11 p.m.; Sunday 10 a.m.2 p.m. and 4-10 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, MC, V. An emphasis on presentation highlights the colorfully decorated Tequila Factory; each dish looks like a work of art. The food, featuring typical Mexican fare, usually tastes pretty good—but it always looks amazing. An all-youcan-eat brunch is offered from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. every Sunday. (11-20-03) $$-$$$ TERESA’S MOSAIC CAFÉ W 2456 N. Silverbell Road. 624-4512. Open MondaySaturday 7:30 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sunday 7:30 a.m.-2 p.m. Diner/Full Bar. DIS, MC, V. With regional Mexican cuisine, featuring the cooking of Oaxaca, Teresa’s Mosaic Café has become one of the nicer places in town to suck down margaritas and nibble on fresh tortillas. A lofty view of the Catalinas and the rich complexity of Oaxacan molés can be sampled with equal pleasure. $-$$ ZENDEJAS #13 C 1628 E. Sixth St. 867-8001. Open daily 10 a.m.-10

p.m. Café/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, VISA. Legendary UA placekicker Max Zendejas is back, and instead of serving up last-second field goals, he’s serving up inexpensive Mexican fare. Burros are central, as is cold beer and the casual, comfy atmosphere. The red chili burro is a winner for red meat-lovers; seafood fans will find a grilled tilapia burro. Gringos can munch on wings and burgers. The place is tiny, so if you want to get a table on game day, get there early. (9-9-10) $ ZIVAZ MEXICAN BISTRO E 4590 E. Broadway Blvd. 325-1234. Open Monday-

Thursday 11 a.m.-8 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.9 p.m. Café/Counter. Beer, Wine and Specialty Drinks. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. While the look and layout of Zivaz feels familiar, the restaurant’s melding of tasty, nuanced Mexican food with a fast-casual format is quite unique. Most of the dishes—from standards like tacos, sopa de tortilla and enchiladas to somewhat unusual fast-casual fare like the pescado ajillo (a garlic/mushroom mahimahi)—are sure to please. (4-6-06) $-$$

MIDDLE EASTERN ALIBABA PERSIAN AND MEDITERRANEAN RESTAURANT C 2545 E. Speedway Blvd., No. 125. 319-2559. Open Monday-Saturday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sunday 11 a.m.8 p.m. Counter/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. This humble strip-mall restaurant serves a variety of delicious kabobs, pita sandwiches, lamb shank, gyro and more. Vegetarians have plenty of options. Catering services are available. $ FALAFEL KING

SAN CARLOS MEXICAN GRILL W 1370 N. Silverbell Road, No. 180. 792-2075. Open Monday-Friday 10 a.m.-9 p.m.; Saturday 8 a.m.-9 p.m. Café/No Alcohol. DIS, MC, V. Ample, reliable servings of shrimp and fish dishes inspired by Sea of Cortez cuisine, plus the usual Sonoran favorites, are as unpretentious but appealing as the restaurant’s nicely done storefront space. (11-15-07) $-$$

C 1800 E. Fort Lowell Road, No. 168. 319-5554. Open

SIR VEZA’S TACO GARAGE

C 3699 N. Campbell Ave. 325-3771. Open Sunday-

E 4699 E. Speedway Blvd. 323-8226. Open Sunday-

Thursday 11 a.m.-10 p.m. (bar open until midnight); Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-midnight (bar open until 2 a.m.). Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Sir Veza’s is a cool concept, mixing cars (including occasional hotrod-themed events), booze, sports, music and youthful energy. The food is cheap and largely tasty, with numerous taco offerings, salads, burgers and even “chicken and churros.” The patio is wonderful (even if the view is not), and there are numerous tequila choices. This is a great place to get just a little bit rowdy with friends. (6-3-10). $-$$ TACO GIRO MEXICAN GRILL E 5754 E. 22nd St. 514-2199. Open daily 8 a.m.-10 p.m. Café. Beer and Margaritas. AMEX, MC and V. It’s an undeniable formula for success: great food at seriously low prices. The salsa bar’s cool, and the service is quick and friendly. There’s no decor to speak of, however: This is a place to go when you’re craving good Mexican food, and you don’t want to bust your budget. (2-21-08) $ TAQUERIA PICO DE GALLO S 2618 S. Sixth Ave. 623-8775. Open daily 9 a.m.-10 p.m. Counter/Diner/No Alcohol. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V.

Monday-Saturday 11 a.m.-8 p.m. Café/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Falafel King offers high-quality Lebanese fast food. The shawarma can sometimes be a tad dry, but the lamb kabobs are moist; the falafel is superb; and the baba ganoush—a pureed eggplant dip— is smokey, rich and irresistible. (2-7-08) $-$$ LUXOR CAFÉ Wednesday 5 p.m.-1 a.m.; Thursday 5 p.m.-2 a.m.; Friday and Saturday 5 p.m.-4 a.m. Café/No Alcohol. DIS, MC, V. A large and fascinating menu combined with excellent cooking makes this comfortably exotic, hospitable Middle Eastern joint a standout; fair prices make it a great value. The owner and chef are both from Egypt, which is reflected in the presence of homestyle vegetarian specialties like falafel, fool (spiced, mashed fava beans) and koshari (a homey mixture of rice, beans and pasta), plus a wide selection of chicken, beef, lamb and fish dishes. Don’t miss the superb baklava. (5-1707) $-$$ NUR MARKET AND RESTAURANT C 3565 E. Speedway Blvd. 881-6333. Open daily 10

a.m.-6 p.m.; closed Friday from noon-1 p.m. Counter/ No Alcohol. MC, V. The space may be small, but the flavors coming out of this tiny market kitchen are huge. All of those wonderful spices that once caused European explorers to travel to the East—cinnamon, cardamom, turmeric, pepper, saffron, cumin, cloves, etc.—are used in the most heavenly ways. The beef shish kabob is tender and full of deep flavors. The goat curry is a delight. The rice pilaf (bariis) is aromatic and bright with color. And the sambusas, Somali versions of samosas, put their Indian cousins to shame. (4-14-11) $


SHISH KEBAB HOUSE OF TUCSON E 5855 E. Broadway Blvd., No. 118. 745-5308. Open Monday 11 a.m.-8 p.m.; Tuesday-Saturday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sunday noon-8 p.m. CafĂŠ/Counter/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V, Checks. Try the motabal, a sinuous purĂŠe of eggplant grilled over an open flame, completely unlike any baba ganoush weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve ever had. Together with a deftly light and lemony version of hummos and the cracked-wheat dish tabouli, it makes a refreshing meal. The kafta is ground beef with a hint of ginger. Meals at Shish Kebab House are all available to goâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and with seating for no more than 60, that seems like a good plan. $-$$ SINBADâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S FINE MEDITERRANEAN CUISINE C 810 E. University Ave. 623-4010. Open MondayThursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Saturday noon-10 p.m.; Sunday 4-8 p.m. CafĂŠ/Beer and Wine. DIS, MC, V. The atmosphere at this university-area restaurant is delightfully beautiful, and the foodâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s even better. Fresh, flavorful and often healthyâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;many selections are vegetarianâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no wonder Sinbadâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is a Tucson favorite. (5-8-03) $-$$ SULTAN PALACE C 943 E. University Blvd., No. 115. 622-2892. Open daily 11 a.m.-10 p.m. CafĂŠ/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. The dĂŠcor may be kind of blah (although the low-level tables surrounded by curtains are nice, if your knees can handle them), and the service is a mixed bag, but the food at this Main Gate Square Afghani restaurant can rival any in town. Check out the myriad, nuanced flavors that all come together in the shish and the sambossas. For a special treat, try the mantu, a spiced meat ravioli/dumpling sort of thing. Yum. (7-308) $$-$$$ ZAYNA MEDITERRANEAN CAFE E 9105 E. Tanque Verde Road, No. 103. 749-4465. Open daily 11 a.m. to 8 p.m. Counter/BYO. MC, V. Also at 4122 E. Speedway Blvd. (881-4348). Zaynaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s serves up some of the best beef gyro youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll find anywhere. The meats served here are all moist and perfectly cooked, and the vegetarian offerings are delightful and flavorful. Consider a piece of baklava for dessert. (11-12-09) $-$$

PAN-ASIAN ASIAN BISTRO C 3122 N. Campbell Ave., No. 100. 881-7800. Open Monday-Thursday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-midnight; Sunday 11 a.m.-9 p.m. CafĂŠ/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Yes, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll find plenty of traditional Asian plates here, but this midtown â&#x20AC;&#x153;bistroâ&#x20AC;? also offers an assortment of dishes from all over China, Thailand and other countries. While dining at the restaurant is a pleasant experience, Asian Bistro also delivers to a wide area of midtown. Beverages include fruity slushes, bubble teas and blended coffees. (5-29-08) $-$$ THE BAMBOO CLUB E 5870 E. Broadway Blvd., No. 524. 514-9665. Open Sunday-Thursday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-11 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. An upscale Pacific Rim palace of a place where generous portions of familiar food with exotic twists are grilled, woked, sizzled, steamed and noodled. (12-12-02) $$-$$$ BUSHI E 4689 E. Speedway Blvd. 325-6552. Open MondayThursday 11 a.m.-2:30 p.m. and 4:30-9:30 p.m.; Friday 11 a.m.-2:30 p.m. and 4:30-10 p.m.; Saturday noon-2:30 p.m. and 4:30-10 p.m.; Sunday noon-2:30 p.m. and 4:30-9 p.m. CafĂŠ/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. At Bushi, not only is the sushi fresh and mouthwatering; all of the other dishes, from soup to dessert, are quite good. Starters are impressive; try the gyoza and the octopus salad. The entrĂŠes are well-prepared, especially the spicy shrimp, with its buttery, garlicky breadcrumb topping, and the spicy Korean-style pork. (9-29-11) $-$$$

CHOPSTIX ASIAN DINER S 3820 S. Palo Verde Road, Suite 101. 889-7849. Open Monday-Thursday 10:30 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday 10 a.m.-9:30 p.m.; Saturday 11 a.m.-9:30 p.m.; Sunday 11:30 a.m.-8:30 p.m. Counter/Diner/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. This diner serves fresh, fast food done up Asian style. By day, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a buffet. And at night, it offers friendly table service with all types of Asian specialties. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a nice place to enjoy a quick lunch or meet with friends. Enjoy the tasty wor wonton soup and crab puffs. No sushi, though. (1-20-05) $-$$ DAOâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S TAI PANâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S E 446 N. Wilmot Road. 722-0055. Open daily 10 a.m.-8 p.m. CafĂŠ/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. A huge menu of delicious Chinese and Vietnamese cuisine makes Daoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s worth visiting. The restaurant may look like a fast-food joint, but the cuisine and the service prove that Daoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is anything but. Be sure to try the multifaceted Vietnamese crepe. (2-17-05) $-$$

PIZZA

throwing and pizza-baking show. All three sauces (red, white and pesto) are tasty; just be careful while selecting the often-pricey toppings. (9-25-08) $$-$$$

1702 C 1702 E. Speedway Blvd. 325-1702. Open MondaySaturday 11 a.m.-11 p.m. CafĂŠ/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. This little university-area pizza joint has friendly service and pizza slices bigger than your head. With an ever-changing 50-plus beers on tap, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s something for everyone. If thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not enough, generous salads and delicious wings will keep you coming back for more. (3-13-08) $$

MAGPIES GOURMET PIZZA E 105 S. Houghton Road. 751-9949. Open MondaySaturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday 11 a.m.-9 p.m. Counter/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. Also at 4654 E. Speedway Blvd. (795-5977), 605 N. Fourth Ave. (628-1661) and 7315 N. Oracle Road (2972712). Only the Fourth Avenue location serves beer and wine. This local chain brags about serving the best pizza in townâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and to a large extent, they back up that brag. Fresh ingredients and lots of them highlight their diverse selection of pies. (6-12-03) $-$$

BIANCHIâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S W 1110 N. Silverbell Road. 882-8500. Open SundayThursday 11 a.m.-11 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-midnight. Counter/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Twice-cooked for crisp crust that tears well, their Meateaterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Supreme is packed at 13 inches. $-$$

OM MODERN ASIAN KITCHEN NW 1765 E. River Road. 299-7815. Open SundayWednesday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Thursday-Saturday 11 a.m.-1 a.m. Full Cover/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. The menu at this sleek â&#x20AC;&#x153;modern kitchenâ&#x20AC;? reads like a culinary tour of Asia. Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a sure hand and a creative mind in the kitchen, assuring that flavors and textures come together in wonderful ways. A potato salad laced with luscious duck confit was splendid, and the sushi is as pretty as it is tasty. Bento boxes are served at lunch. (5-20-10) $$-$$$

BROOKLYN PIZZA COMPANY C 534 N. Fourth Ave. 622-6868. Open MondayThursday 11 a.m.-11 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-2:30 a.m.; Sunday noon-10 p.m. Counter/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. There may be nothing gourmet or innovatively outrageous about Brooklyn Pizza, but if you like your pie with a crunchy, handtossed crust, a savory simmered tomato sauce, lots of gooey mozzarella cheese and the traditional toppings of your choice, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve come to the right place. Sandwiches also reflect attention to the â&#x20AC;&#x153;only best ingredientsâ&#x20AC;? philosophy. Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s nothing here that will disappoint. $

PEI WEI ASIAN DINER C 845 E. University Blvd. 884-7413. Open SundayThursday 11 a.m.-9:30 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Summer hours: daily 11 a.m.-9 p.m. Counter/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Also at 5285 E. Broadway Blvd. (514-7004) and 633 W. Ina Road (297-3238). The folks behind P.F. Changâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s have brought fast-casual Asian fare to Tucson with its Pei Wei chain, and the mini-Changâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s does the parent proud. Featuring delicious, freshly prepared Asian standards at fairly cheap prices, Pei Wei is a great place to grab some fine Asian food to go, or to sit down with the college kids and eat in a modern atmosphere. (11-27-03) $-$$

BZâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S PIZZA E 9431 E. 22nd St., No. 137. 546-1402. Open Sunday-Thursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m. CafĂŠ/Beer and Wine. DIS, MC, V. Eastsiders have a nifty little pizza joint that puts out some great gourmet pies. The crust is light and chewy; the sauce is smooth and rich; and if you canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t find a topping you like, you should just stay home. Nightly pasta specials, great salads and sandwiches are on the menu. The vibe is family-friendly, although BZâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is also a great place to meet friends for a glass of wine and a couple of pizzas. (7-7-11) $-$$

SERI MELAKA E 6133 E. Broadway Blvd. 747-7811. Open MondayThursday 11 a.m.-9:30 p.m.; Friday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Saturday 11:30 a.m.-10 p.m.; Sunday 11:30 a.m.-9:30 p.m. CafĂŠ/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. For a wonderful dip into the festive and aromatic cooking of Southeast Asia, a trip to Seri Melaka will leave your senses swimming. From the spicy, authentic sambals to the outstanding curries, Seri Melaka serves up authentic cuisine at reasonable prices. (10-18-01) $$ TAKAMATSU E 5532 E. Speedway Blvd. 512-0800. Open SundayThursday 11 a.m.-10 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-midnight. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. After a devastating fire, Takamatsu is back. If you like Japanese or Korean food, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll find plenty of tasty entrĂŠes here, although the emphasis is on Korean barbecue and sushi (including the tempting all-you-can-eat option for $19.95). For an interactive, do-it-yourself treat, try preparing the Korean barbecue yourself at your table. Just consider yourself warned: Pork belly, though delicious, will catch on fire if youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re not paying attention. (12-1-11) $$-$$$ WEI ASIAN CAFĂ&#x2030; E 9450 E. Golf Links Road. 722-1119. Open MondaySaturday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Sunday noon-9 p.m. CafĂŠ/ Beer and Wine. MC, V. The far eastsideâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s restaurant scene is looking a bit better thanks to Wei. The cafĂŠ aspires to be truly pan-Asian, featuring a huge menu of dishes attributed to China, Vietnam, Thailand, Korea, Hong Kong, Japan and Singapore. The food is reasonably priced and consistently decent to excellent. Give the sesame chicken a shot if youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re unsure what to try. (10-20-05) $-$$

EMPIRE PIZZA AND PUB C 137 E. Congress St. 882-7499. Open SundayWednesday 11 a.m.-11 p.m.; Thursday-Saturday 11 a.m.-3 a.m. Counter/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Empire Pizza and Pub has injected a new kind of life into downtown Tucson, serving up big New York-style pizza by the slice (or whole), along with some salads and Italian sandwiches. The small patio offers views of the craziness on Congress Street, while the back bar area offers a couple of TVs featuring whatever game happens to be on. (2-3-11) $ GRANDMA TONYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S E 7010 E. Broadway Blvd. 885-7117. Open SundayThursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Diner/No Alcohol. MC, V. Also at 7878 E. Wrightstown Road (886-4461). Brought to you by the folks at the Gaslight Theatre, these are hand-tossed pies with a round edge and real mozzarella. The favorites are the ham and pineapple or the mushroom and sausage. For the same lowish price, you can also order any combination of toppings. $-$$ GRIMALDIâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S C 446 N. Campbell Ave., No. 100. 882-6100. Open daily 11 a.m.-11 p.m. Bistro/Full Bar. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. One of New York Cityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s highest-rated pizza joints is serving some of the best pizza in Tucson. Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll pay more here for your coal brick-oven pie, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s worth it. We recommend sitting in the bar area while you munch on your pizza or calzone, so you can watch the dough-

MARCOâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S PIZZA S 6330 E. Golf Links Road, Suite 142. 747-3898.

Open Sunday-Thursday 11 a.m.-11 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-midnight. Counter/No Alcohol. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Also at 10550 N. La CaĂąada Drive (2976500) and 5650 S. 12th Ave., Suite 180 (300-4449). This Ohio-based franchise offers some of the better chain-joint pizza in Tucson. The chicken fresco pieâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; featuring moist grilled chicken, tangy red sauce and delicious baconâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;left our mouths watering and wanting more. Some of the employees werenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t as knowledgeable as they could have been, but thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no denying that Marcoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s makes exceptionally tasty, moderately priced pizzas. (12-18-08) $$-$$$ NO ANCHOVIES C 870 E. University Blvd. 623-3333. Open daily 11 a.m.-midnight or later. Counter/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Gourmet pizzas find dizzying combinations of fresh and unusual ingredients. Catering to signature creations or simply celebrating pizza, No Anchovies puts a new spin on the old pie. (8-2-01) $-$$ OREGANOâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S E 4900 E. Speedway Blvd. 327-8955. Open daily 11

a.m.-10 p.m. Diner. Beer, Wine and Specialty Drinks. AMEX, DC, DIS, MC, V. A 1950s-style pizza joint, Oreganoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is sure to please on every level. From handmade stuffed pizzas and enormous bowls of pastas to salads and Italian favorites (lasagna, sausage sandwiches, ravioli), Oreganoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s has it all. Be sure to call ahead to see how long the line is, since the wait can easily be an hour. (1-3-02) $-$$ PICAZZOâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S ORGANIC ITALIAN KITCHEN NW 7850 N. Oracle Road. 544-7970. Open Sunday-

Thursday 11 a.m.-9 p.m.; Friday and Saturday 11 a.m.-10 p.m. CafĂŠ/Full Bar. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. In a sea of pizza restaurants, Picazzoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is a standout. With a huge gluten-free selection and a menu that focuses on â&#x20AC;&#x153;naturalâ&#x20AC;? and organic ingredients, this is pizza that is not only incredibly tasty; it might just be a little better for you. Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t miss out on the garlic-butter crust, which gently pushes that sinfully delicious pizza toward the brink of flavor insanity. (6-23-11) $$ RENEEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S ORGANIC PIZZA KITCHEN E 7065 E. Tanque Verde Road. 886-0484. Open daily

11 a.m.-9 p.m. CafĂŠ/Beer and Wine. AMEX, DIS, MC, V. Folks on the eastside have reason to celebrate. This little gem of a pizzeria offers up pizzas, pastas, sandwiches and salads using fresh and often organic ingredients. A nice little wine list is available. This is a familyfriendly place that rivals other upscale pizza joints in town. (3-23-06) $-$$

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!#&=5^dacW0eT$!%!"'% DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2011

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MUSIC

SOUNDBITES

Neshama Carlebach and the Green Pastures Baptist Church Choir want to give people something to hold on to

By Stephen Seigel, musiced@tucsonweekly.com

Jewish Soul Music BY GENE ARMSTRONG, garmstrong@tucsonweekly.com eshama Carlebach performs what has been called Jewish soul music. She sings about peace on global and personal levels, advocates all-encompassing love, espouses the joy of family, and promotes a caregiver’s attitude toward the world. She also keeps alive the musical tradition of her late father, Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach, one of the most-prominent Jewish songwriters of the second half of the 20th century. Her father performed Jewish-based folk music for people of all backgrounds, and his daughter has carried on his legacy since his death in 1994. The soulfulness in her work is, perhaps, no accident: Her first name means “soul” in Hebrew. Her music concerns a prevailing quest for spiritual fulfillment and robustly sets her father’s lyrics and melodies in a contemporary pop and rock context. Quite simply, Carlebach, 37, wants to help heal the world with her music. “The world needs healing. That is my ultimate dream; that is my inspiration and the reason that I wake up to do this work,” she says during a recent phone interview from the home in New York City she shares with her husband and two young sons. In the course of speaking with Carlebach, one realizes that her worldview and her music are inseparable. She says “it all comes down to this: There’s no need to ever not be kind. I mean, why bother? Anger is the most-debilitating thing in the world. It takes more effort to be angry than it does just to let it go.” She takes nothing in life for granted, and when complimented on the power of her voice and music, she is genuinely humble. “You have no idea what it means to me to have someone tell me that what I do moves them. It’s amazing to me.” Carlebach’s message is about affirming life, and her music accomplishes the same. Her recent albums are beautiful, to be sure—but they rock furiously, too, in large part because of the fervent commitment behind her positive messages. The occasional wailing guitar lead, rubbery soulful groove and furiously pounded piano seem to emanate from a richly human place, where the spirit resides. So it makes sense that Carlebach would seek out a gospel choir to collaborate with for her album Higher and Higher, released in 2009 on her independent label, Sojourn Records. That group, the Green Pastures Baptist Church Choir, from Bronx, N.Y., is on tour with Carlebach, and it will share the stage with her and her band on Saturday, Dec. 17, at the Fox Tucson Theatre. It will be Carlebach’s first concert in Tucson. “I haven’t been to Arizona much at all. I think

Neshama Carlebach

N

Affirming the Consequent

O HOLY COVER-UP!

I’ve played there twice in my career, but never in Tucson yet.” Carlebach acknowledges that, outside of the Jewish-music community, she is not wellknown. She compares her career to the Dr. Seuss story Horton Hears a Who! “You look down, and there’s an entire world that you might have overlooked, and nobody knows about it on the upstairs world,” she says. “That’s kind of what the Jewish world is. I’ve been a celebrity, quote-unquote, or at least a successful musician in my own world, but in the greater world, people have no idea this is going on underneath.” She admits, though, that she has a built-in audience, thanks to the Jewish community and the groundbreaking music of her father. “In my career, I have been very, very blessed in my work. Anyone who comes to hear my music, for that, I am always desperately grateful. “You have to be authentic and continue to give something worthwhile, or people won’t want to listen. It’s a validation of what I do whenever anyone comes to my concerts, so I don’t want to sound like I am ever complaining about my career.” Carlebach just released her eighth album, a children’s CD titled Every Little Soul Must Shine, which features lullabies in both Hebrew and English. Like most of Carlebach’s recordings, it features several compositions by her father. Known to his fans as Reb Shlomo, the elder Carlebach performed for more than 40 years. Although she always sang, his daughter studied to be an actress. When she was 15, she began singing for fun with her father, whom she called her best friend. This offered her the chance to be around him more often. “He was never around very much at home, but he called every day. I always knew where to reach him wherever he was in the world. I still have his AT&T phone card.” Their collaboration can be heard on the

Neshama Carlebach with the Green Pastures Baptist Church Choir 8 p.m., Saturday, Dec. 17 Fox Tucson Theatre 17 W. Congress St. $25 to $45 547-3040; foxtucsontheatre.org

album Ha Neshama Shel Shlomo, which shows him passing the torch to his then-19-year-old daughter. She left college in her second year to perform on the road with him. They were on tour together in Canada in 1994 when he passed away unexpectedly. “When he died, he had a whole year of shows booked. People asked, ‘What happens now?’ and, ‘How will we go on?’ And suddenly, I had a career. It was a really strange experience. I think I felt nothing for a very long time.” She took over Reb Shlomo’s concert obligations, continuing to perform his songs out of sorrow and guilt—but that was soon transformed into happiness. She has dedicated her career to her father ever since. “I saw how much people needed him and how much they depended on him, like he was their water. And I didn’t want him to be forgotten,” she said. Reb Shlomo’s philosophy about performing has influenced his daughter’s. “My father would travel around the world, and he’d say, ‘I went to Australia for one day, and I went to India for one day, and I went to California for one day,’ and he’d say, ‘If I touched one person, it was worth it.’” When she discusses her father’s career, and her own, Carlebach knows what matters. “It’s all about touching one person. We don’t know why we’re here on this planet, but if you can give somebody something, one thing to hold on to, to me, that is the whole point. Maybe that is the reason we are all here.”

It’s here! It’s here! It’s finally here! Tonight begins the most-fun-filled local-music event of the year. Over the next three nights (and one day), at three different venues, The 14th Annual Great Cover-Up is where you’ll want to be (unless you like hearing your friends brag about how awesome it was, and what a big loser you are for missing it). In case you’ve been living under a rock, here’s a bit of background from last week’s column: “A brief history: The idea for the event was stolen wholesale from Champaign, Ill., where I attended a few Cover-Ups in the ’90s. The idea was to gather a bunch of local bands, each of which would pick a well-known artist to cover in a 20-minute set—while keeping it secret who they were covering until they hit the stage, in order to maximize the element of surprise. The best part of all was that the money raised would go to charity. “It’s a simple, ingenious idea, and when I told Shoebomb’s Melissa Manas about it, we decided it would translate well to Tucson. She took the reins and organized the first Tucson Cover-Up back in 1998. When she had to bow out the following year due to pregnancy, an ever-shifting team over the years (this year, it’s me; Tucson Weekly contributor Mel Mason; the Rialto Theatre’s Curtis McCrary and Ryan Trayte; Club Congress’ David Slutes; and local promoter Dan Hernandez; Matt Milner of KXCI FM 91.3’s Locals Only will emcee the event) picked up where she left off. Since then, the Cover-Up has grown by leaps and bounds, first expanding to two nights, then three. And this year, for the first time ever, the event will be held at three different venues over three nights, and at two of those venues during the day (on Saturday only), making this, with more than 60 bands participating, the biggest Cover-Up yet. “All of the proceeds over the years have been donated to charity. This year’s beneficiary, as it has been for the last four, will be the Tucson Artists and Musicians Healthcare Alliance (TAMHA), which provides informational and monetary healthcare resources to local, uninsured artists.” The 2011 edition will be held at Plush tonight, Thursday, Dec. 15; Club Congress on Friday, Dec. 16; and the Rialto Theatre on Saturday, Dec. 17. Additionally, on Saturday, Dec. 17, both Congress and the Rialto will feature acts during the day from 12:30 to 5:30 p.m. To sweeten the deal further, there will be food trucks present to enable you to nosh while you mosh—or at least tap your toes. In previous years, we’ve published a schedule saying what times the local acts were playing, along with a general list of who was being covered that night. This year, we’re flipping the script— letting you know which bands are being covered in each time slot, with a general list of the local bands performing. The schedule for tonight at Plush, 340 E. Sixth St., was published in last week’s Soundbites. If you

CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2011

TuCsONWEEKLY

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SOUNDBITES CONTINUED

The Good Little Thieves

from Page 43

ALL DAY EVERY DAY SPECIALS:

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TOP TEN Zia Records’ top sales for the week ending Dec. 12, 2011 1. The Black Keys El Camino (Nonesuch)

2. Korn The Path of Totality (Roadrunner)

3. The Hangover Part II (DVD) Warner Bros.

4. Drake Take Care (Cash Money)

5. Chevelle Hats Off to the Bull (Epic)

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6. Amy Winehouse

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7. Cowboys and Aliens (DVD)

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Lioness: Hidden Treasures (Universal Republic) Universal

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Al Perry

missed it, you can still find it at tucsonweekly. com, plushtucson.com or at greatcoveruptucson. com, which is the most-reliable source for things like last-minute schedule changes. Without further ado, here’s the rest of the schedule: Night Two at Club Congress, 311 E. Congress St., on Friday, Dec. 16: Jethro Tull (7 p.m.), King Crimson (7:30 p.m.), Cracker/ Camper Van Beethoven (8 p.m.), Eric Clapton (8:30 p.m.), Joe Satriani (9 p.m.), Gin Blossoms (9:30 p.m.), Arcade Fire (10 p.m.), The Zombies (10:30 p.m.), TV Show Theme Songs (11 p.m.), Aerosmith (11:30 p.m.), The Clash (midnight), Mariah Carey (12:30 a.m.), Van Morrison (1 a.m.) and Lullabies (TBA). In no particular order, here are the acts doing the covering: Gabriel Sullivan, DJPJ (aka Paul Jenkins of … music video?), Some of Them Are Old, Ryan Green and Cameron Hood of Ryanhood (performing separately), The David Clark Band, Fish Karma, Shrimp Chaperone, Marianne Dissard, Spacefish, Emergency Broadcast System, Ferrodyne, Flagrante Delicto and Crosscut Saw. Daytime at Club Congress (all ages) on Saturday, Dec. 17: Paul McCartney and Wings (1 p.m.), Pearl Jam (1:30 p.m.), Cyndi Lauper (2 p.m.), Radiohead (2:30 p.m.), Joan Jett (3 p.m.), The Cramps (3:30 p.m.), Brain Damage Orchestra (4 p.m.) and Bob Marley (4:30 p.m.) In no particular order, the bands doing the covering: Run-On Sunshine, Planet Jam, Jumper, The Wayback Machine, Affirming the Consequent and Peaks. Daytime at the Rialto Theatre (all ages), 318 E. Congress St., on Saturday, Dec. 17: Mississippi Fred McDowell (12:30 p.m.), Grand Funk Railroad (1 p.m.), Paul Simon (1:30 p.m.), Evanescence (2 p.m.), Little Richard (2:30 p.m.), Son House (3 p.m.), Ryan Adams (3:30 p.m.), L7 (4 p.m.), Madonna (4:30 p.m.) and Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers (5 p.m.). In no particular order, the acts doing the covering at the Rialto during the day: Funky Bonz, Alisha Peru, Sugar Stains, Christopher Stevens, Worm, Gaza Strip, Boreas, Katie Haverly, Roman Barten-Sherman and The Good Little Thieves. Night Three at the Rialto Theatre (all ages) on Saturday, Dec. 17: Abba (7:30 p.m.), Nirvana (8 p.m.), Alice in Chains (8:30 p.m.), The Poetry of Charles Bukowski set to music (9 p.m.), Traveling Wilburys (9:30 p.m.), Wilco (10 p.m.), A Perfect Circle (10:30 p.m.), E.L.O. (11 p.m.), The Beach Boys (11:30 p.m.), Earth Wind and Fire (midnight), New Orleans funeral march (12:30 a.m.), Cheap Trick (1 a.m.) and Black Eyed Peas (1:30 a.m.). In no particular order, the acts doing the covering: Seashell Radio with The Modeens, Al Perry, Leila Lopez, Sergio Mendoza, American Android, Doctor Dinosaur, The Tryst, Monster Pussy, The Awkward Moments, Krista Khrome’s Feed, 8 Minutes to Burn, The Wyatts and The Jons. Please note that the times listed here are not “club” times or door times: These are the actual times when bands will start (a novel concept, I know), so please plan accordingly. Admission is a suggested donation of $8 for one night, $12 for two nights, or $15 for all three, with every penny going to TAMHA. Again, for more information, including last-

minute schedule updates (if necessary), head to greatcoveruptucson.com. For more info about TAMHA, go to tucsonartists.org. You can reach Club Congress at 622-8848 or hotelcongress.com/club. And you can reach the Rialto Theatre at 740-1000 or rialtotheatre.com. See you there!

STUFF THIS! The Great Cover-Up isn’t the only worthwhile benefit happening this weekend. On Saturday, Dec. 17, Club Carnage will be the site for the Stuff the Bug Holiday Ball, which is just what its name suggests: There will be VW bugs on hand to be filled up with unwrapped toys that will be donated to Casa de los Niños, which “offers a variety of programs designed to prevent child abuse and to care for children who have already been abused.” And there’s plenty of entertainment to be had, too. Santa and his pinup helpers will be on hand to take photos. There will be a Haunted Holiday Mini Haunt, a raffle, local food and craft vendors, and 10 musical acts performing: John Holmes (2 p.m.), Dante Febbraro (3 p.m.), Gonzo’s Dogs (4 p.m.), Roadrunner Gunner (5 p.m.), Despondency Denied (6 p.m.), Deceptively Innocent (7 p.m.), Sinister Mustard (8 p.m.), Rhythm Dragons (9 p.m.), Neiphi (10 p.m.) and Knock-Out (11 p.m.). Doors open at noon. Club Carnage is located at 1102 W. Grant Road. Admission is a suggested donation of $10, or bring an unwrapped toy, and save $3. The event is open to those of all ages, but there will be a full bar with valid ID. Kids 6 and younger get in free. For more information, track down the event on Facebook.

ON THE BANDWAGON There’s no shortage of other great stuff happening this week. Let’s take a quick look-see at some of it, eh? Get out the cocoa butter: Christmas With Aaron Neville with Chris Pierce at the Fox Tucson Theatre on Friday, Dec. 16; Yip Deceiver (featuring members of Of Montreal), RCougar and O/W/L/S at Plush on Monday, Dec. 19; Rescue Lights CD-release show with Ladylike and Diver City at Club Congress on Wednesday, Dec. 21; MyTown Music Community Concert at Club Congress on Sunday, Dec. 18; Lenguas Largas, Monster Pussy and Otherly Love at Plush on Friday, Dec. 16; Big Bad Santa Bash with The Mission Creeps, Black Cherry Burlesque and The Furys at Surly Wench Pub on Friday, Dec. 16; Scrilla Gorilla, Shaun Harris with Full Release and Big Meridox at Plush on Saturday, Dec. 17; A Holiday to Remember with Diane Van Deurzen and Lisa Otey at St. Francis in the Foothills on Saturday, Dec. 17, O’Shaughnessy’s (dinner show) on Sunday, Dec. 18, and Z Mansion on Monday, Dec. 19; Rafael Moreno y Descarga: Viva la Salsa! at the Rialto Theatre tonight, Thursday, Dec. 15; Golden Boots, Amy Rude, Al Foul and Hank Topless tonight, Thursday, Dec. 15, at La Cocina (this show is being recorded for future release); Solar Culture Milanga! at Solar Culture Gallery on Saturday, Dec. 17; Phat Entertainment Holiday Party at Club Congress on Wednesday, Dec. 21; CCS Crew at Vaudeville on Saturday, Dec. 17.


CLUB LIST Here is a list of venues that offer live music, dancing, DJ music, karaoke or comedy in the Tucson area. We recommend that you call and confirm all events. AMADO TERRITORY STEAKHOUSE 3001 E. Frontage Road. Amado. 398-2651. ARIZONA INN 2200 E. Elm St. 325-1541. ARMITAGE WINE LOUNGE AND CAFÉ 2905 E. Skyline Drive, No. 168. 682-9740. THE AULD DUBLINER 800 E. University Blvd. 206-0323. AZUL RESTAURANT LOUNGE Westin La Paloma, 3800 E. Sunrise Drive. 742-6000. THE BAMBOO CLUB 5870 E. Broadway Blvd., No. 524. 514-9665. THE BASHFUL BANDIT 3686 E. Speedway Blvd. 795-8996. BEAU BRUMMEL CLUB 1148 N. Main Ave. 622-9673. BEDROXX 4385 W. Ina Road. 744-7655. BEST WESTERN ROYAL SUN INN AND SUITES 1015 N. Stone Ave. 622-8871. BLUEFIN SEAFOOD BISTRO 7053 N. Oracle Road. 531-8500. BOJANGLES SALOON 5244 S. Nogales Highway. 889-6161. BOONDOCKS LOUNGE 3306 N. First Ave. 690-0991. BRATS 5975 W. Western Way Circle. 578-0341. BRODIE’S TAVERN 2449 N. Stone Ave. 622-0447. BUFFALO WILD WINGS 68 N. Harrison Road. 296-8409. CACTUS MOON 5470 E. Broadway Blvd. 748-0049. CAFÉ PASSÉ 415 N. Fourth Ave. 624-4411. CAFE TREMOLO 7401 N. La Cholla Blvd., No. 152. 742-2999. THE CANYON’S CROWN RESTAURANT AND PUB 6958 E. Tanque Verde Road. 885-8277. CASA VICENTE RESTAURANTE ESPAÑOL 375 S. Stone Ave. 884-5253. CASCADE LOUNGE Loews Ventana Canyon Resort, 7000 N. Resort Drive. 615-5495. CHICAGO BAR 5954 E. Speedway Blvd. 748-8169. CLUB CONGRESS 311 E. Congress St. 622-8848. CLUB CARNAGE 1102 W. Grant Road. (805) 407-3370. LA COCINA RESTAURANT, CANTINA AND COFFEE BAR 201 N. Court Ave. 622-0351. COW PALACE 28802 S. Nogales Highway. Amado. (520) 398-1999. COW PONY BAR AND GRILL 6510 E. Tanque Verde Road. 721-2781. CUSHING STREET RESTAURANT AND BAR 198 W. Cushing St. 622-7984. DELECTABLES RESTAURANT AND CATERING 533 N. Fourth Ave. 884-9289. THE DEPOT SPORTS BAR 3501 E. Fort Lowell Road. 795-8110. DESERT DIAMOND CASINO MONSOON NIGHTCLUB 7350 S. Nogales Highway. 294-7777. DESERT DIAMOND CASINO SPORTS BAR Interstate 19 and Pima Mine Road. 393-2700. DIABLOS SPORTS BAR AND GRILL 2545 S. Craycroft Road. 514-9202. DRIFTWOOD RESTAURANT AND LOUNGE 2001 S. Craycroft Road. 790-4317. DRY RIVER COLLECTIVE 740 N. Main Ave. 882-2170. DV8 5851 E. Speedway Blvd. 885-3030.

ECLIPSE AT COLLEGE PLACE 1601 N. Oracle Road. 209-2121. EDDIES COCKTAILS 8510 E. Broadway Blvd. 290-8750. EL CHARRO CAFÉ SAHUARITA 15920 S. Rancho Sahuarita. Sahuarita. 325-1922. EL CHARRO CAFÉ ON BROADWAY 6310 E. Broadway Blvd. 745-1922. EL MEZÓN DEL COBRE 2960 N. First Ave. 791-0977. EL PARADOR 2744 E. Broadway Blvd. 881-2744. ELBOW ROOM 1145 W. Prince Road. 690-1011. ENOTECA PIZZERIA WINE BAR 58 W. Congress St. 623-0744. FAMOUS SAM’S BROADWAY 1830 E. Broadway Blvd. 884-0119. FAMOUS SAM’S E. GOLF LINKS 7129 E. Golf Links Road. 296-1245. FAMOUS SAM’S SILVERBELL 2320 N. Silverbell Road. 884-7267. FAMOUS SAM’S VALENCIA 3010 W. Valencia Road. 883-8888. FAMOUS SAM’S W. RUTHRAUFF 2480 W. Ruthrauff Road. 292-0492. FAMOUS SAM’S IRVINGTON 2048 E. Irvington Road. 889-6007. FAMOUS SAM’S ORACLE 8058 N. Oracle Road. 531-9464. FAMOUS SAM’S PIMA 3933 E. Pima St. 323-1880. FIRE + SPICE Sheraton Hotel and Suites, 5151 E. Grant Road. 323-6262. FLYING V BAR AND GRILL Loews Ventana Canyon Resort, 7000 N. Resort Drive. 299-2020. FOX AND HOUND SMOKEHOUSE AND TAVERN Foothills Mall, 7625 N. La Cholla Blvd. 575-1980. FOX TUCSON THEATRE 17 W. Congress St. 624-1515. FROG AND FIRKIN 874 E. University Blvd. 623-7507. LA FUENTE 1749 N. Oracle Road. 623-8659. FUKU SUSHI 940 E. University Blvd. 798-3858. GENTLE BEN’S BREWING COMPANY 865 E. University Blvd. 624-4177. GILLIGAN’S PUB 1308 W. Glenn St. 623-3999. GLASS ONION CAFE 1990 W. River Road, Suite 100. 293-6050. GOLD Westward Look Resort, 245 E. Ina Road. 917-2930, ext. 474. GOLDEN PIN LANES 1010 W. Miracle Mile. 888-4272. THE GRILL AT QUAIL CREEK 1490 Quail Range Loop. Green Valley. 393-5806. GUADALAJARA GRILL EAST 750 N. Kolb Road. 296-1122. GUADALAJARA GRILL WEST 1220 E. Prince Road. 323-1022. HACIENDA DEL SOL 5601 N. Hacienda del Sol Road. 299-1501. HANGOVER’S BAR AND GRILL 1310 S. Alvernon Way. 326-2310. THE HIDEOUT 3000 S. Mission Road. 791-0515. HILDA’S SPORTS BAR 1120 Circulo Mercado. Rio Rico. (520) 281-9440. THE HUT 305 N. Fourth Ave. 623-3200. IBT’S 616 N. Fourth Ave. 882-3053. IGUANA CAFE 210 E. Congress St. 882-5140. JASPER NEIGHBORHOOD RESTAURANT AND BAR 6370 N. Campbell Ave., No. 160. 577-0326. JAVELINA CANTINA 445 S. Alvernon Way. 881-4200, ext. 5373.

JEFF’S PUB 112 S. Camino Seco Road. 886-1001. KINGFISHER BAR AND GRILL 2564 E. Grant Road. 323-7739. KON TIKI 4625 E. Broadway Blvd. 323-7193. LAFFS COMEDY CAFFÉ 2900 E. Broadway Blvd. 323-8669. LAS CAZUELITAS 1365 W. Grant Road. 206-0405. LEVEL BAR LOUNGE 4280 N. Campbell Ave., Suite 37. 615-3835. LI’L ABNER’S STEAKHOUSE 8500 N. Silverbell Road. 744-2800. LINDY’S AT REDLINE SPORTS GRILL 445 W. Wetmore Road. 888-8084. LOOKOUT BAR AND GRILLE 245 E. Ina Road. 297-1151. THE LOOP TASTE OF CHICAGO 10180 N. Oracle Road. 878-0222. LOVIN’ SPOONFULS VEGETARIAN RESTAURANT 2990 N. Campbell Ave., Suite 120. 325-7766. LUNA BELLA ITALIAN CUISINE AND CATERING 2990 N. Swan Road, No. 145. 325-3895. M&L AIRPORT INN BAR AND GRILL 2303 E. Valencia Road. 294-1612. MALIBU YOGURT AND ICE CREAM 825 E. University Blvd. 903-2340. MARGARITA BAY 7415 E. 22nd St. 290-8977. MAVERICK 6622 E. Tanque Verde Road. 298-0430. MAYNARDS MARKET AND KITCHEN 400 N. Toole Ave. 545-0577. MCMAHON’S PRIME STEAKHOUSE 2959 N. Swan Road. 327-7463. MIDTOWN BAR AND GRILL 4915 E. Speedway Blvd. 327-2011. MINT COCKTAILS 3540 E. Grant Road. 881-9169. MOONEY’S PUB 1110 S. Sherwood Village Drive. 885-6443. MR. AN’S TEPPAN STEAK AND SUSHI 6091 N. Oracle Road. 797-0888. MR. HEAD’S ART GALLERY AND BAR 513 N. Fourth Ave. 792-2710. MUSIC BOX 6951 E. 22nd St. 747-1421. NEVADA SMITH’S 1175 W. Miracle Mile. 622-9064. NIMBUS BREWING COMPANY TAPROOM 3850 E. 44th St. 745-9175. NORTH 2995 E. Skyline Drive. 299-1600. O’MALLEY’S 247 N. Fourth Ave. 623-8600. THE OFFICE BAR 6333 S. Sixth Ave. 746-9803. OLD FATHER INN 4080 W. Ina Road. Marana. 744-1200. OLD PUEBLO GRILLE 60 N. Alvernon Way. 326-6000. OLD TUBAC INN RESTAURANT AND SALOON 7 Plaza Road. Tubac. (520) 398-3161. ON A ROLL 63 E. Congress St. 622-7655. THE ONYX ROOM 106 W. Drachman St. 620-6699. ORACLE INN 305 E. American Ave. Oracle. 896-3333. O’SHAUGHNESSY’S 2200 N. Camino Principal. 296-7464. PARADISO BAR AND LOUNGE Casino Del Sol, 5655 W. Valencia Road. (800) 344-9435. LA PARRILLA SUIZA 2720 N. Oracle Road. 624-4300. PEARSON’S PUB 1120 S. Wilmot Road. 747-2181. PINNACLE PEAK 6541 E. Tanque Verde Road. 296-0911. PLUSH 340 E. Sixth St. 798-1298. PUTNEY’S 6090 N. Oracle Road. 575-1767. RPM NIGHTCLUB 445 W. Wetmore Road. 869-6098.

RA SUSHI BAR RESTAURANT 2905 E. Skyline Drive. 615-3970. RAGING SAGE COFFEE ROASTERS 2458 N. Campbell Ave. 320-5203. LE RENDEZ-VOUS 3844 E. Fort Lowell Road. 323-7373. RIALTO THEATRE 318 E. Congress St. 740-1000. RIC’S CAFE/RESTAURANT 5605 E. River Road. 577-7272. RIVER’S EDGE LOUNGE 4635 N. Flowing Wells Road. 887-9027. RJ’S REPLAYS SPORTS PUB AND GRUB 5769 E. Speedway Blvd. 495-5136. ROCK N’ JAVA 7555 W. Twin Peaks Road. Marana. 572-5738. THE ROCK 136 N. Park Ave. 629-9211. ROYAL SUN INN AND SUITES 1015 N. Stone Ave. 622-8871. RUNWAY BAR AND GRILL 2101 S. Alvernon Way. 790-6788. RUSTY’S FAMILY RESTAURANT AND SPORTS GRILLE 2075 W. Grant Road. 623-3363. SALTY DAWG II 6121 E. Broadway Blvd., No. 106. 790-3294. SAM HUGHES PLACE CHAMPIONSHIP DINING 446 N. Campbell Ave. 747-5223. SAPPHIRE LOUNGE 61 E. Congress St. 624-9100. SHARKS 256 E. Congress St. 791-9869. SHERATON HOTEL AND SUITES 5151 E. Grant Road. 323-6262. SHOOTERS STEAKHOUSE AND SALOON 3115 E. Prince Road. 322-0779. SHOT IN THE DARK CAFÉ 121 E. Broadway Blvd. 882-5544. SINBAD’S FINE MEDITERRANEAN CUISINE 810 E. University Ave. 623-4010. SKY BAR 536 N. Fourth Ave. 622-4300. THE SKYBOX RESTAURANT AND SPORTS BAR 5605 E. River Road. 529-7180. SOLAR CULTURE 31 E. Toole Ave. 884-0874. STADIUM GRILL 3682 W. Orange Grove Road. Marana. 877-8100. STOCKMEN’S LOUNGE 1368 W. Roger Road. 887-2529. SULLIVAN’S STEAK HOUSE 1785 E. River Road. 299-4275. SURLY WENCH PUB 424 N. Fourth Ave. 882-0009. TANQUE VERDE RANCH 14301 E. Speedway Blvd. 296-6275. TERRY AND ZEKE’S 4603 E. Speedway Blvd. 325-3555. UNICORN SPORTS LOUNGE 8060 E. 22nd St., No. 118. 722-6900. V FINE THAI 9 E. Congress St. 882-8143. VAUDEVILLE 110 E. Congress St. 622-3535. VERONA ITALIAN RESTAURANT 120 S. Houghton Road. 722-2722. VOYAGER RV RESORT 8701 S. Kolb Road. 574-5000. WESTWARD LOOK RESORT 245 E. Ina Road. 297-1151. WHISKEY TANGO 140 S. Kolb Road. 344-8843. WILD BILL’S STEAKHOUSE AND SALOON 5910 N. Oracle Road. none. WILDCAT HOUSE 1801 N. Stone Ave. 622-1302. WINGS-PIZZA-N-THINGS 8838 E. Broadway Blvd. 722-9663. WISDOM’S CAFÉ 1931 E. Frontage Road. Tumacacori. 398-2397. WOODEN NICKEL 1908 S. Country Club Road. 323-8830. WOODY’S 3710 N. Oracle Road. 292-6702. ZEN ROCK 121 E. Congress St. 624-9100.

THU DEC 15 LIVE MUSIC Arizona Inn Bob Linesch The Auld Dubliner Live local music Beer Belly’s Pub Open jam Boondocks Lounge Ed DeLucia Band Cactus Moon Los Gallegos and Robert Moreno Café Passé Jeff Grubic and Naim Amor Casa Vicente Restaurante Español Classical guitar Cascade Lounge Doug Martin Chicago Bar Neon Prophet La Cocina Restaurant, Cantina and Coffee Bar Stefan George Eddies Cocktails Cass Preston and His Band Fire + Spice Live jazz with Prime Examples La Fuente Mariachi Estrellas de la Fuente Guadalajara Grill East Live mariachi music Guadalajara Grill West Live mariachi music Hacienda del Sol Nick Stanley The Hut Hypercrush Las Cazuelitas Live music Maverick Flipside McMahon’s Prime Steakhouse Susan Artemis O’Malley’s Live music On a Roll Live music The Onyx Room Larry Loud and George Howard O’Shaughnessy’s Live pianist and singer Paradiso Bar and Lounge L.A. Cast of Beatlemania Pinnacle Peak Bluegrass Music Jam Plush The Great Cover-Up: Shaun Harris, Still Life Telescope, Faster Than Light, Muddy Bug, Early Black, Young Mothers, Jeremy Michael Cashman, The Monitors, The Distortionists, The Swigs, Genevieve and the LPs RPM Nightclub 80’s and Gentlemen Rialto Theatre Rafael Moreno y Descarga Sheraton Hotel and Suites Prime Example Sky Bar Live music Sullivan’s Steak House Live music Wild Bill’s Steakhouse and Saloon Wild Oats

KARAOKE/OPEN MIC The Bamboo Club Karaoke with DJ Tony G Bedroxx Karaoke with DJ Chubbz Bojangles Saloon Buffalo Wild Wings Tucson’s Most Wanted Entertainment with KJ Sean The Depot Sports Bar El Charro Café Sahuarita Famous Sam’s Silverbell Amazing Star karaoke Famous Sam’s Valencia Gilligan’s Pub Glass Onion Cafe Open mic Golden Pin Lanes Karaoke and music videos with DJ Adonis Hilda’s Sports Bar M&L Airport Inn Bar and Grill Margarita Bay Mooney’s Pub Open mic Mr. Head’s Art Gallery and Bar Cutthroat Karaoke Music Box Karaoke with AJ River’s Edge Lounge Karaoke with KJ David Royal Sun Inn and Suites Y Not Karaoke Stadium Grill Karaoke, dance music and music videos with DJ Tigger Voyager RV Resort Karaoke with the Tucson Twosome

DANCE/DJ Azul Restaurant Lounge DJ spins music Diablos Sports Bar and Grill XLevel DJs Eclipse at College Place DJ spins music Gentle Ben’s Brewing Company DJ spins music The Hideout Fiesta DJs IBT’s DJ spins music Javelina Cantina DJ M. Sam Hughes Place Championship Dining DJ spins music Sapphire Lounge Salsa night Sharks DJ Aspen Surly Wench Pub Clean Cut with DJ Natalia Unicorn Sports Lounge Y Not Entertainment Zen Rock DJ Kidd Kutz

COMEDY Laffs Comedy Caffé Open mic

CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE

If you would like your band, club or solo act to be listed, send all pertinent times, dates, prices and places to: Club Listings, Tucson Weekly, P.O. Box 27087, Tucson, AZ 85726. Fax listings to 792-2096. Or e-mail us at clubs@tucsonweekly.com. Deadline to receive listings information is noon on Friday, seven days before the Thursday publication date. For display advertising information, call 294-1200.

DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2011

TuCsONWEEKLY

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CONTINUED FROM PAGE 45

FRI DEC 16 LIVE MUSIC Amado Territory Steakhouse Becky Reyes featuring Scott Muhleman Arizona Inn Dennis Reed The Bamboo Club Live music The Bashful Bandit Live music Bluefin Seafood Bistro George Howard Duo Bojangles Saloon Live music Boondocks Lounge Neon Prophet Cactus Moon Robert Moreno Cafe Tremolo William Tell and Patrick Caulley The Canyon’s Crown Restaurant and Pub Live music Cascade Lounge Doug Martin Chicago Bar The AmoSphere Club Congress The Great Cover-Up: Some of Them Are Old, Fish Karma, DJPJ, Gabe Sullivan, Ryan Green, Shrimp Chaperone, Cameron Hood, Spacefish, The David Clark Band, Ferrodyne, Emergency Broadcast System, Flagrante Delicto, Crosscut Saw La Cocina Restaurant, Cantina and Coffee Bar Greg Morton Delectables Restaurant and Catering Stefan George Dry River Collective Forever Of, Chubbish Rubbish Eclipse at College Place Live music Eddies Cocktails Dust Devils El Mezón del Cobre Mariachi Azteca El Parador Descarga, Salsarengue, Tito y Su Nuevo Son Famous Sam’s E. Golf Links Live music Fox Tucson Theatre Aaron Neville La Fuente Mariachi Estrellas de la Fuente Glass Onion Cafe Kiko The Grill at Quail Creek Paul McGuffin Guadalajara Grill East Live mariachi music Guadalajara Grill West Live Latin music Hacienda del Sol Freddy Vesely, Aaron Gilmartin The Hideout Grupo la Madrid The Hut Atlantis Rising Las Cazuelitas Mariachis Li’l Abner’s Steakhouse Arizona Dance Hands Lindy’s at Redline Sports Grill The Retro Rockets Lovin’ Spoonfuls Vegetarian Restaurant Elisabeth Blin Luna Bella Italian Cuisine and Catering Tom Jones and Elvis Presley impersonators Maverick Flipside McMahon’s Prime Steakhouse Daniel “Sly” Slipetsky Mint Cocktails Live music Mooney’s Pub Roadrunner Gunner Mr. An’s Teppan Steak and Sushi Los Cubanos Mr. Head’s Art Gallery and Bar Collin Shook Trio Old Father Inn Live music Oracle Inn Gone Country Band O’Shaughnessy’s Live pianist and singer Paradiso Bar and Lounge Desert Cadillacs La Parrilla Suiza Mariachi music Plush Lounge: The El Camino Royales. Main stage: Otherly Love, Monster Pussy, Lenguas Largas Ric’s Cafe/Restaurant Live music River’s Edge Lounge Wild Ride RJ’s Replays Sports Pub and Grub Metal tribute: Gods of Wrath, Operation Mind Crime, Savage Zoo The Rock Battle of the Bands: We Are Nemesis, Metal Saints, Message to the Masses, Rusty Green, Chordata, One for the Fall, Contraband

Shot in the Dark Café Mark Bockel The Skybox Restaurant and Sports Bar 80’s and Gentlemen Stadium Grill Live music Sullivan’s Steak House Live music Surly Wench Pub Mission Creeps, Black Cherry Burlesque, The Furys V Fine Thai The Quartet Vaudeville DJ Grapla, Lee Hybrid Whiskey Tango Vintage Sugar Wild Bill’s Steakhouse and Saloon Beau Renfro and Clear Country Wisdom’s Café Angel Perez Woody’s Susan Artemis

KARAOKE/OPEN MIC Best Western Royal Sun Inn and Suites Karaoke with DJ Richard Brats Brodie’s Tavern Cow Palace Karaoke with DJ Famous Sam’s W. Ruthrauff Famous Sam’s Oracle Chubb Rock with Ray Brennan Famous Sam’s Pima IBT’s Karaoke with Troy St. John Iguana Cafe Jeff’s Pub Kustom Karaoke Margarita Bay Midtown Bar and Grill Putney’s Karaoke, dance music and music videos with DJ Soup Royal Sun Inn and Suites Y Not Karaoke Salty Dawg II Tucson’s Most Wanted Entertainment with KJ Sean Shooters Steakhouse and Saloon Stockmen’s Lounge Terry and Zeke’s Wings-Pizza-N-Things YNot Entertainment

DANCE/DJ The Auld Dubliner DJ spins music Azul Restaurant Lounge Ladies and Lyrics Night: DJ spins music Bedroxx DJ spins music Casa Vicente Restaurante Español Flamenco guitar and dance show Desert Diamond Casino Monsoon Nightclub Groove with 106.3 Desert Diamond Casino Sports Bar Fright night party Diablos Sports Bar and Grill XLevel DJs DV8 Planet Q Live with Chris P. and JoJo El Charro Café Sahuarita DJ spins music El Charro Café on Broadway DJ spins R&B El Parador Salsa dance lessons with Jeannie Tucker Famous Sam’s Valencia DJ spins music Fuku Sushi DJ spins music Hangover’s Bar and Grill DJ spins music IBT’s DJ spins music Javelina Cantina DJ M. Level Bar Lounge DJ Rivera Lindy’s at Redline Sports Grill DJ spins music M&L Airport Inn Bar and Grill DJ Big Surge Maynards Market and Kitchen DJ spins music Music Box ’80s and more NoRTH DJ spins music O’Malley’s DJ Dibs The Onyx Room DJ Mista T Sam Hughes Place Championship Dining DJ spins music

The Wayback Machine at Club Congress

SATURDAY//DECEMBER 17 Sapphire Lounge Flashback Fridays with DJ Sid the Kid Sinbad’s Fine Mediterranean Cuisine DJ spins music Sky Bar Hot Era party Unicorn Sports Lounge Y Not Entertainment Vaudeville Ill Styles with Sugarman and Roc Wildcat House Top 40 dance mix Wooden Nickel DJ spins music Woody’s Tori Steele’s Cover Girl Revue Zen Rock DJ Kidd Kutz

COMEDY Laffs Comedy Caffé Greg Wilson, Steven Alan Green Rock n’ Java Not Burnt Out Just Unscrewed

SAT DEC 17 LIVE MUSIC Arizona Inn Dennis Reed The Bashful Bandit Live music Bluefin Seafood Bistro Stefan George Bojangles Saloon Live music Boondocks Lounge Kevin Pakulis, Tall Paul Band Café Passé Elephant Head Trio Cafe Tremolo Live music Cascade Lounge George Howard Chicago Bar Neon Prophet Club Congress The Great Cover-Up Daytime: Peaks, Planet Jam, Smallvox, Run-On Sunshine, The

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DANCE/DJ The Auld Dubliner DJ spins music Bedroxx DJ spins music Brodieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Tavern Latino Night Cactus Moon Line-dance lesson Casa Vicente Restaurante EspaĂąol Flamenco guitar and dance show Club Congress Bang! Bang! dance party La Cocina Restaurant, Cantina and Coffee Bar DJ Herm Desert Diamond Casino Sports Bar Saturday Night Party Diablos Sports Bar and Grill XLevel DJs El Charro CafĂŠ on Broadway DJ Soo Latin mix El Parador Salsa dance lessons with Jeannie Tucker Famous Samâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Valencia DJ spins music Gentle Benâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Brewing Company DJ spins music IBTâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Saturday Starlets Drag Show, DJ spins music Lindyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s at Redline Sports Grill DJ spins music M&L Airport Inn Bar and Grill DJ Caliente Music Box â&#x20AC;&#x2122;80s and more On a Roll DJ Aspen Rustyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Family Restaurant and Sports Grille DJ Obi Wan Kenobi Sam Hughes Place Championship Dining DJ spins music

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SAT DEC 17

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Sapphire Lounge DJ 64, DJ Phil Sharks DJ Chucky Chingon Sinbad’s Fine Mediterranean Cuisine Belly dancing with Emma Jeffries and friends Wildcat House Tejano dance mix Wooden Nickel DJ spins music Woody’s DJ Michael Lopez Zen Rock DJ Kidd Kutz

COMEDY Laffs Comedy Caffé Greg Wilson, Steven Alan Green

SUN DEC 18 LIVE MUSIC Arizona Inn Dennis Reed Armitage Wine Lounge and Café Ryanhood The Auld Dubliner Irish jam session The Bashful Bandit Sunday Jam with the Deacon Beau Brummel Club R&B jam session Boondocks Lounge The Last Call Girls Chicago Bar Larry Diehl Band Club Congress My Town Music Community Concert La Cocina Restaurant, Cantina and Coffee Bar Elisabeth Blin Driftwood Restaurant and Lounge Live music Eddies Cocktails Dust Devils La Fuente Mariachi Estrellas de la Fuente The Grill at Quail Creek Paul McGuffin Guadalajara Grill East Live mariachi music Guadalajara Grill West Live Latin music Hacienda del Sol Freddy Vesely The Hut Tucson Rock Alliance Christmas party: Ben Michaels Las Cazuelitas Live music Li’l Abner’s Steakhouse Titan Valley Warheads McMahon’s Prime Steakhouse David Prouty Nimbus Brewing Company Taproom CopperMoon Old Pueblo Grille Live music O’Shaughnessy’s Live pianist and singer Plush The Bennu Raging Sage Coffee Roasters Paul Oman

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The Rock Wayne Static, Angelic to Ashes, Bapitzed Under Fire, Solace in Nothing, I the Creation Sullivan’s Steak House Live music Verona Italian Restaurant Melody Louise

KARAOKE/OPEN MIC The Bashful Bandit Y-Not Karaoke Club Congress Club Karaoke Cow Pony Bar and Grill Diablos Sports Bar and Grill Elbow Room Open mic Famous Sam’s W. Ruthrauff Family karaoke The Hideout IBT’s Ama zing Star Entertainment Margarita Bay Mint Cocktails Open mic Mooney’s Pub Putney’s Karaoke, dance music and music videos with DJ Soup River’s Edge Lounge Karaoke with KJ David Salty Dawg II Tucson’s Most Wanted Entertainment with KJ Sean Shooters Steakhouse and Saloon The Skybox Restaurant and Sports Bar Karaoke and music videos with Jamie J. DJ Stockmen’s Lounge Whiskey Tango Karaoke and dance music with DJ Tigger Wooden Nickel Woody’s

DANCE/DJ Fox and Hound Smokehouse and Tavern Team Trivia with DJ Joker IBT’s DJ spins music Kon Tiki DJ Century Level Bar Lounge DJ Phatal Ra Sushi Bar Restaurant DJs spin music Runway Bar and Grill Singing, drumming DJ Bob Kay plays oldies Shot in the Dark Café DJ Artice presents Power Ballad Sundays

CONTINUED ON PAGE 50

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NINE QUESTIONS 16540 W Avra Valley Rd. off exit 242 in Marana OPEN UNTIL 2AM / 7 DAYS A WEEK

Leila Lopez A kindergarten teacher at the Tucson Waldorf School by day, Tucson native Leila Lopez is a singer, songwriter and multi-instrumentalist who regularly performs around town. She’s currently recording material for her third album. In the meantime, you can catch her playing a set of covers by a band far removed from the folk-rock for which she is known as part of The Great Cover-Up, on Saturday, Dec. 17, at the Rialto Theatre.

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SATURDAY, DEC 10 - Standing Shadows, The Modeens THURSDAY, DEC 15 - Souled Out SATURDAY, DEC 17 - Madame Zero, Tracked Souls TUESDAY, DEC 20 - Bossa Rhythm Project THURSDAY, DEC 22 - Souled Out MON: TEAM TRIVIA @ 7pm: Compete for Gift Cards to Brooklyn Pizza Co.! Game Night, Free Pool Open - Close Happy Hour TUES: Family Evening w/ $8.88 Cheese Pizzas / Educational Astronomy Show, Jazz night. WED: Open Mic 6pm – Midnight THURS: $2 Full Sail Drafts. Live Music, No Cover! FRI: Red Bull Drink Specials and Fire Dancers 7 & 8 pm/Stoli Drink Specials O/W/L/S presents HOT ERA. DANCE. DRINK. FUN. $2 well vodka from 11pm-1am SAT: Live Music, No Cover! SUN: Open to Close Happy Hour!

What are you listening to these days? Midlake, The Trials of Van Occupanther; Bonobo, Black Sands; Grizzly Bear, Veckatimest; Local Natives, Gorilla Manor.

What musical act, current or defunct, would you most like to see perform live? Led Zeppelin. Bonzo’s intuition on the drums has had a huge impact on how I have learned and adapted to different styles of playing. Musically speaking, what is your favorite guilty pleasure? It’s not exactly guilty, but potentially tease-worthy: Janet Jackson, Mariah Carey, and any ’90sera grunge rock. What song would you like to have played at your funeral? The Monkees’ theme song on repeat. What band or artist changed your life, and how? Playing music with my family and friends around this town has changed my life. … Learning, collaborating and constantly being inspired by the people you love is totally mindblowing. I feel pretty darn lucky. Figurative gun to your head, what is your favorite album of all time? Joni Mitchell, Blue.

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What was the first concert you ever saw? Lollapalooza 1996. It was my grungy teenage dream come true to see Rancid, the Ramones and Devo all in one concert.

What artist, genre or musical trend does everyone seem to love, but you just don’t get? New rap. T-Pain’s song “Buy You a Drank,” to be specific. You can’t buy someone a drink in the past tense.

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What was the first album you owned? The Jackson 5’s Anthology. I hid the cassette behind a crate of records in a tiny music store that used to be on Fourth Avenue so that I could come back a week later and buy it with my tooth-fairy money.

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LIVE MUSIC LIVE MUSIC Arizona Inn Dennis Reed Boondocks Lounge Bryan Dean Trio Chicago Bar The Ronstadts Guadalajara Grill East Live mariachi music Guadalajara Grill West Live Latin music Hacienda del Sol Freddy Vesely The Hut Cadillac Mountain hosts bluegrass open-mic Kingfisher Bar and Grill George Howard Duo Las Cazuelitas Live music McMahonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Prime Steakhouse David Prouty Plush O/W/L/S, RCougar, Yip Deceiver Sullivanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Steak House Live music

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LIVE

WED DEC 21 Arizona Inn Bob Linesch The Bamboo Club Melody Louise Trio Bojangles Saloon Live music CafĂŠ PassĂŠ Glen Gross Quartet Cascade Lounge Gabriel Romo Chicago Bar Bad News Blues Band Club Congress Rescue Lights album-release La Cocina Restaurant, Cantina and Coffee Bar Elephant Head Cow Pony Bar and Grill Jay Faircloth Eddies Cocktails Dust Devils Guadalajara Grill East Live mariachi music Guadalajara Grill West Live Latin music Hacienda del Sol Nick Stanley Las Cazuelitas Live music McMahonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Prime Steakhouse Susan Artemis Oâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Shaughnessyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Live pianist and singer Plush Black Jackalope Ensemble Raging Sage Coffee Roasters Paul Oman Le Rendez-Vous Elisabeth Blin RJâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Replays Sports Pub and Grub Cooper Meza Shot in the Dark CafĂŠ Open mic Sullivanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Steak House Live music Tanque Verde Ranch Live music

KARAOKE/OPEN MIC

Club Congress DJ Sid the Kid IBTâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s DJ spins music Surly Wench Pub Black Monday with DJ Matt McCoy and guests

TUE DEC 20 LIVE MUSIC Arizona Inn Bob Linesch Casa Vicente Restaurante EspaĂąol Live Spanish guitar Chicago Bar Jacques Taylor and the Real Deal Fire + Spice Tucson Jazz Institute Guadalajara Grill East Live mariachi music Guadalajara Grill West Live mariachi music Hacienda del Sol Nick Stanley Las Cazuelitas Live music McMahonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Prime Steakhouse Susan Artemis Mr. Headâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Art Gallery and Bar Open jazz and blues jam Plush Stefan George Sheraton Hotel and Suites Arizona Roadrunners Sky Bar Bossa Rhythm Project Stadium Grill Open jam Sullivanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Steak House Live music V Fine Thai Trio V Whiskey Tango Karaoke and music videos with DJ Tigger

KARAOKE/OPEN MIC The Auld Dubliner Open mic with DJ Odious Beau Brummel Club Cactus Tune Entertainment with Fireman Bob Beer Bellyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pub The Canyonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Crown Restaurant and Pub Open mic Famous Samâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s W. Ruthrauff Jeffâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pub Kustom Karaoke M&L Airport Inn Bar and Grill Malibu Yogurt and Ice Cream Open mic Margarita Bay Music Box Karaoke with AJ Old Father Inn Riverâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Edge Lounge Karaoke with KJ David Salty Dawg II Tucsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Most Wanted Entertainment with KJ Sean Sharks Karaoke with DJ Tequila Terry and Zekeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s

Beer Bellyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pub Tucsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Most Wanted Entertainment with KJ Sean Brats Diablos Sports Bar and Grill Tequila DJ karaoke show Famous Samâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Broadway Famous Samâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s E. Golf Links Kustom Karaoke Famous Samâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s W. Ruthrauff Famous Samâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Irvington Fox and Hound Smokehouse and Tavern Karaoke, dance music and music videos with DJ Tony G Frog and Firkin Singâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;n with Scotty P. Gentle Benâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Brewing Company Y Not Entertainment with Trish Hangoverâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bar and Grill Lindyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s at Redline Sports Grill Margarita Bay Mint Cocktails Karaoke with Rosemary Mooneyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pub Music Box Karaoke with AJ On a Roll Pearsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pub Amazing Star karaoke Putneyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Karaoke, dance music and music videos with DJ Soup Riverâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Edge Lounge Karaoke with KJ David RJâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Replays Sports Pub and Grub Shooters Steakhouse and Saloon Sky Bar Open mic with DJ Odious

DANCE/DJ Cactus Moon Country dance lesson Casa Vicente Restaurante EspaĂąol Tango classes and dancing Club Congress PHAT Holiday Party: DJs Sonario, Tranceducer, Squarzan, Whiteboi, Hart, Ghast and others The Hideout Fiesta DJs IBTâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s DJ spins music Level Bar Lounge Big Brother Beats M&L Airport Inn Bar and Grill DJ Big Surge Rustyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Family Restaurant and Sports Grille Sid the Kid Sharks DJ Chucky Chingon Sinbadâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Fine Mediterranean Cuisine DJ Spencer Thomas and friends

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DANCE/DJ Club Congress All Dubstep Night: PC Party IBTâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s DJ spins music Sam Hughes Place Championship Dining DJ spins music

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MONDAY | TUESDAY | WEDNESDAY | THURSDAY | FRIDAY | SATURDAY | SUNDAY

CHAMPS

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 48

X, THE BLACK TIBETANS, S SEAN WHEELER AND ZANDER SCHLOSS FOX TUCSON THEATRE Saturday, Dec. 10 More than 30 years after its formation, the legendary Los Angeles band X sounded as good as everâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;hell, probably better than everâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;as it roared through about 80 minutes of vintage punk â&#x20AC;&#x2122;nâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; roll Saturday night. The four original members reunited about a dozen years ago and have been playing regular tours since. This time around, they performed in the venerable Fox, and bassistvocalist John Doe noted it was â&#x20AC;&#x153;a long way from Tumbleweeds,â&#x20AC;? the long-defunct dive bar where X played its first Tucson gig in 1980. After all these years, the band still seems relevant and committed. Billy Zoomâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s guitar peeled out like a souped-up muscle car fueled on a mixture of rockabilly, surf and nitrocharged blues, while jazz-trained drummer DJ Bonebrake found the rhythmic connections between swinging grooves, the Bo Diddley beat and garage rock. The vocal harmonies by Doe and Exene Cervenka remain unique. Their combined howlâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;sometimes unified, sometimes contrapuntalâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;artfully melded avant-garde melody, poetic phrasing and rock â&#x20AC;&#x2122;nâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; roll fury. And, good lord, the songs! From the opening salvo of â&#x20AC;&#x153;Your Phoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Off the Hook, But Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re Notâ&#x20AC;? to the final assault of â&#x20AC;&#x153;Devil Doll,â&#x20AC;? the concert was a testament to the richness of the bandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s early catalogâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;the bulk of the set list drew from the first four albums. Xâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tunes may not possess the same â&#x20AC;&#x153;shock of the newâ&#x20AC;? they once had, but the ensuing years have honed them into precision instruments. Such gems as â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Hungry Wolf,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a Mess; Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s in My Kiss,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;White Girl,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Los Angeles,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Blue Spark,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Nausea,â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Beyond and Backâ&#x20AC;? and â&#x20AC;&#x153;Johnny Hit and Run Paulineâ&#x20AC;? still sounded true; after all, personal trials and social revolution never go out of fashion. Politically motivated numbers such as â&#x20AC;&#x153;I Must Not Think Bad Thoughtsâ&#x20AC;? (which Doe and Exene performed with only his acoustic guitar as accompaniment) and â&#x20AC;&#x153;The New Worldâ&#x20AC;? felt as relevant in 2011 as they did in the early â&#x20AC;&#x2122;80s. When the duo sang, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Our whole fucking life is a wreck,â&#x20AC;? during â&#x20AC;&#x153;Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re Desperate,â&#x20AC;? you didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t need to believe it literally was the case for these now-middle-age musiciansâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;but you knew someone listening feels exactly that way. Gene Armstrong garmstrong@tucsonweekly.com


RHYTHM & VIEWS Kitchen on Fire

Various Artists

Los Campesinos!

Here We Are

Fac. Dance: Factory Records 12” Mixes and Rarities, 1980-1987

Hello Sadness

SELF-RELEASED

ARTS AND CRAFTS

STRUT

The debut album by this local quartet features gently boisterous folk-rock tunes touched with elements of country and jazz. Guitarist Tim Daldrup and bassist Dave Knipe wrote the 12 tunes together, and both sing, as does keyboards player Susan Artemis. Drummer George Liggins completes the group, and their combined sound balances energy and a laid-back ’tude. The opening track, “Here We Are,” uses upfront strumming and Artemis’ delicate piano fills to create a mood that is classy but refreshingly homegrown, and it sets the tone for the rest of the album. These players have been seen and heard around Tucson in other combinations and contexts, and this new recording has a concise focus that will appeal to fans of classic rock, thanks to some subtle musical references. The loping, country-road rockers “St. George’s Wood” and “Oh Sweet Mama” recall the Grateful Dead, while “Might as Well” choogles with a bit of the Creedence stamp on country and R&B. Then there’s the eco-friendly “Greenhouse Blues,” which credibly kicks up some dust, sounding like an outtake from the Rolling Stones’ Tattoo You period. Artemis is perhaps the band’s secret weapon. She contributes excellent harmonies throughout and takes the lead on “Mustang Corners,” which sounds a little like Joni Mitchell with Crosby, Stills and Nash adding lush harmonies. Her understated barrelhouse piano parts also are essential to such bluesy honky-tonk numbers as “Stop Stop” and “It’s You.” Gene Armstrong Kitchen on Fire’s next gig is at 8 p.m., Saturday, Jan. 7, at Plush, 340 E. Sixth St.; $5; 798-1298.

Forgoing tracks by Factory Records’ most-well-known acts (at least in the United States)—Joy Division and New Order—Fac. Dance provides a wealth of hard-to-find singles and compilation releases (24 tracks over two CDs), all dedicated to the dance side of the equation. That’s dance music Factory Records-style, mind you, which means a head-spinning array of post-punk, heavy bass-, synth- and processeddrums-driven numbers by largely (but not exclusively) British acts, most of them relatively unknown in the U.S. (outside of fans of esoteric ’80s dance music, that is). The most-familiar act stateside, A Certain Ratio, is represented by “Wild Party” and the nine-minute-plus “Knife Slits Water.” A Certain Ratio drummer Donald Johnson and New Order’s Bernard Sumner have their hands on half the tracks as producers, bringing a consistency of sound. Factory Records’ in-house loon/genius, Martin Hannett, is present behind the board for two tracks by The Durutti Column and Section 25’s classic “Dirty Disco.” New York remix guru Arthur Baker shows up for 12-plus minutes of The Hood’s “Salvation!” But my favorites are two tracks by Quando Quango, “Atom Rock” and the expansive “Genius,” showing what dance music can really be in the hands of visionaries. Jellybean Benitez’s remix of “Cool as Ice” by 52nd Street is another classic, as is their “Looking From a Hilltop.” X-O-Dus, Blurt, Shark Vegas, Swamp Children, Biting Tongues, Royal Family and the Poor, Streetlife, Marcel King, Minny Pops and Abecedarians are all well-represented. Essential. Carl Hanni

A first listen to the sturdy fourth album by Welsh cadre Los Campesinos!, Hello Sadness, can be distressing. Gareth Campesinos! snarls uncomfortably naked lines; the music vacillates almost incongruously from overcharged to restrained; and the whole ordeal feels profoundly removed from the band’s previous work. Yet subsequent spins reveal Hello Sadness as a classic case of band maturation, carefully executed and often deeply moving. “By Your Hand,” the album’s swaggering opener, coupled with the album’s best anthem, the surging “Hello Sadness,” presents subtle variations on what Los Campesinos! has always done well: group singalongs; cutting, intimate lyrics; and displays of musical catharsis. As thrilling as these tunes are, however, the comparably jangly, muscular tune “The Black Bird, the Dark Slope” is a bit exhausting. The true successes for Los Campesinos! on Hello Sadness are the atypical moments. The haunting, slight “Hate for the Island” is febrile and alluring; “To Tundra” is a gorgeous, organically electronic number; and the stunning closer “Light Leaves, Dark Sees Pt. II” is a slinky, slow-burning ballad. It suggests a new avenue that can only enhance this strong group. Due to the album’s engaging, unique moments, including the driving, caustic “Songs About Your Girlfriend,” its miscues are more forgivable. For instance, even Gareth’s continued obsession with soccer finds some charm in “Every Defeat a Divorce (Three Lions).” If the holidays truly are an abjectly miserable, difficult time for many individuals, then Los Campesinos! may have released the holiday album par excellence. Michael Petitti

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MEDICAL MJ There are indeed local businesses where you can buy presents for your medical-marijuana-using loved ones olidays H y p p a H ll! Stay We

Ganja Gifts BY J.M. SMITH, jsmith@tucsonweekly.com n the wake of my disgust at the ShopFuck Fest happening all around usâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;the annual bankmall orgy that leaves medical marijuana horny and alone at the bar at closing time, scanning the crowd for someone to take homeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;I realized I had make a mistake. (See â&#x20AC;&#x153;Ban on Business,â&#x20AC;? Dec. 1.) Not being in the mood for casual shopsex and bitter over our cultureâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s imposed financial Holiday Stress, I overlooked an important fact when I wrote about the jizz at the mall: Pot might not be in the bankmall party, but it turns out thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s plenty of medical-marijuana shoplovinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; out there if you know where to look. So I looked a little. Here are a few examples:

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Sea of Green This indoor growersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; paradise started in downtown Phoenix in 1992 and has since expanded to Tempe, Flagstaff and Tucson.

There are two stores in the Old Puebloâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;at 402 N. Fourth Ave. and 7955 E. Broadway Blvd. The Fourth Avenue stalwart offers plenty for the 13,631 MMJ patients statewide who have asked to grow their own (as of Nov. 25; see The Range at daily.tucsonweekly.com for more information). Offerings behind the jungle in the familiar Fourth Avenue window include everything you need to grow MMJ: lights, containers, hydroponic media, soil, additives, pumps and timersâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and carbon filters for odor control in case you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t want your nosy neighbors to know about the grow room in your apartment. Gifts range from less than $10 to the thousands for complete systems. At the top of my Sea of Green list? A $410 hydro system for eight plants, complete with lights, pots, substrate, nutrients, pumps, watering and light timersâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;everything you need. (OK, baby â&#x20AC;Ś I know youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re reading this. I take back

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what I said about needing an iPad.) Now weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re starting to edge out of shopfuck and into gentle caress. Fathead Glass You donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to smoke your MMJ out of a cheap one-hitter that looks like a cigarette; give the MMJ patient in your life a piece of art instead. Micah Blattâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s glass art shop at 513 N. Fourth Ave. is a wonderland of swirling, glittery goodness for MMJ smokers. The shop offers handmade pipes, water pipes and bubblersâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; most blown right at the front window of the storeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;in every shape, size and color. Prices range from less than $10 to hundreds for large, elaborate glass pieces. Arizona Department of Health Services If you have potential MMJ patients on your gift list, you could give the gift that keeps on givingâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; like sex you think about all through the coming

year: Give them an MMJ card from the Arizona Department of Health Services, which would entitle your loved ones to an entire year of accessible, affordable relief from what ails them. Now that is some serious shoplovinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. When all the costs are combined, an MMJ card costs in the neighborhood of $300, more if you need a diagnosis. Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a pretty awesome stocking stuffer. You could even fill out the initial paperwork, if you know the details, then print the forms (medicalmarijuana.azdhs.gov) and wrap them up all neat and tidy under the holiday symbol of your choice. I use a tree. So in the end, I find that I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have to go to the ShopFuck Festival at all. I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t need to get bankmall jizz all over me while I buy cheap crap from foreign nations. I can give real money to local people in stores that keep cash closer to home. Who needs a shopfuck orgy anyway? Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s better when it means something.

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DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2011

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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY By Rob Brezsny. Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s EXPANDED WEEKLY HOROSCOPE 1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700 $1.99 per minute. 18 and over. Touchtone phone required. ARIES (March 21-April 19): Jim Moran (1908-1999) called himself a publicist, but I regard him as a pioneer performance artist. At various times in his colorful career, he led a bull through a china shop in New York City, changed horses in midstream in Nevada’s Truckee River, and looked for a needle in a haystack until he found it. You might want to draw inspiration from his work in the coming weeks, Aries. You will not only have a knack for mutating clichés and scrambling conventional wisdom; in doing so, you could also pull off feats that might seem improbable. TAURUS (April 20-May 20): One possible way to tap into the current cosmic opportunities would be to seek out storegasms—the ecstatic feelings released while exercising one’s buy-ological urges in consumer temples crammed with an obscene abundance of colorful material goods. But I advise you against doing that. It wouldn’t be a very creative solution to the epic yearnings that are welling up in your down-below-and-deep-inside parts. Instead, I offer a potentially far-more-satisfying recommendation: Routinely maneuver yourself into positions where your primal self will be filled up with sublime wonder, mysterious beauty and smart love. GEMINI (May 21-June 20): I’m not an either-or type of person. I don’t think that there are just two sides of every story, and that you have to align yourself with one or the other. That’s one reason why, as an America voter, I reject the idea that I must either sympathize with the goals of the Democratic Party or the Republican Party. It’s also why I’m bored by the trumpedup squabble between the atheists and the fundamentalist Christians, and the predictable arguments between dogmatic cynics and fanatical optimists. I urge you to try my approach in the coming weeks, Gemini: Find a third way among any two sides that tend to divide the world into Us against Them. CANCER (June 21-July 22): No one actually looks like the retouched images of the seemingly perfect people in sexy ads. It’s impossible to be that flawless, with no wrinkles, blemishes and scars. Acknowledging this fact, the iconic supermodel Cindy Crawford once said, “I wish I looked like Cindy Crawford.”

54 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

Our unconscious inclination to compare ourselves to such unrealistic ideals is the source of a lot of mischief in our lives. Your assignment in the coming week, Cancerian, is to divest yourself, as much as possible, of all standards of perfection that alienate you from yourself or cause you to feel shame about who you really are. (More fodder to motivate you: tinyurl.com/ SoftKill.) LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Barney Oldfield (1878-1946) was a pioneer car racer who was the first ever to run a 100-mph lap at the Indianapolis 500. He was a better driver while setting speed records and beating other cars on racetracks than he was at moseying through regular street traffic. Why? He said he couldn’t think clearly if he was traveling at less than 100 mph. I suspect you may temporarily have a similar quirk, Leo—not in the way you drive, but rather in the way you live and work and play. To achieve maximum lucidity, you may have to be moving pretty fast. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Back in August 2010, there was an 11-day traffic snarl on a Chinese highway. At one point, the stuck vehicles stretched for 60 miles and inched along at the rate of a mile per day. In that light, your current jam isn’t so bad. It may be true that your progress has been glacial lately, but at least you’ve had a bed to sleep in and a bathroom to use, which is more than can be said for the stranded Chinese motorists and truck drivers. Plus I’m predicting that your own personal jam is going to disperse sometime in the next few days. Be prepped and ready to rumble on. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Here’s a joke from Woody Allen’s movie Annie Hall: “Two elderly women are in a Catskills Mountains resort, and one of them says: ‘Boy, the food at this place is really terrible.’ The other one says, ‘Yeah, I know—and such small portions.’” Is it possible you’re acting like the second woman, Libra? Are you being influenced to find fault with something that you actually kind of like? Are you ignoring your own preferences simply because you think it might help you to be close to those whose preferences are different? I urge you not to do that in the coming week. According to my analysis of the astrological omens, it’s very important that you know how you feel and stay true to your feelings.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): The Los Angeles Unified School District dramatically downgraded the role that homework plays in the life of its students. Beginning this fall, the assignments kids do after school account for only 10 percent of their final grade. As far as you’re concerned, Scorpio, that’s not a good trend to follow. In fact, I think you should go in the opposite direction. During the enhanced learning phase you’re now entering, your homework will be more important than ever. In order to take full advantage of the rich educational opportunities that will be flowing your way, you should do lots of research, think hard about what it all means, and in general be very well-prepared. The period between late 2011 and early 2012 is homework time for you. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): The Amazon is the second-longest river in the world, and has such a voluminous flow that it comprises 20 percent of all river water in the world—yet there is not a single bridge that crosses it. I love that fact. It comforts and inspires me to know that humans have not conquered this natural wonder. Which

leads me to my advice for you this week, Sagittarius: Please consider keeping the wild part of you wild. It’s certainly not at all crucial for you to civilize it. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Emotion is the resource we treasure when we’re young, says poet Naomi Shihab Nye—but eventually, what we thrive on even more is energy. “Energy is everything,” she says, “not emotion.” And where does energy come from? Often, from juxtaposition, says Nye. “Rubbing happy and sad together creates energy: rubbing one image against another.” That’s what she loves about being a poet. Her specialty is to conjure magic through juxtaposition. “Our brains are desperate for that kind of energy,” she concludes. I mention this, Capricorn, because the coming weeks will be prime time for you to drum up the vigor and vitality that come from mixing and melding and merging, particularly in unexpected or uncommon ways. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Studies show that if you’re sharing a meal with one other person, you’re likely to eat up to 35 percent more food than if you’re dining

alone. If you sit down at the table with four companions, you’ll probably devour 75 percent extra, and if you’re with a party of eight, your consumption may double. As I contemplate your horoscope, these facts give me pause. While I do suspect you will benefit from socializing more intensely and prolifically, I also think it’ll be important to raise your commitment to your own physical health. Can you figure out a way to do both, please? PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “Were it not for the leaping and twinkling of the soul,” said psychologist Carl Jung, “human beings would rot away in their greatest passion, idleness.” To that edgy observation I would add this corollary: One of the greatest and most-secret forms of idleness comes from being endlessly busy at unimportant tasks. If you are way too wrapped up in doing 1,000 little things that have nothing to do with your life’s primary mission, you are, in my opinion, profoundly idle. All the above is prelude for the climactic advice of this week’s horoscope, which goes as follows: Give everything you have to stimulate the leaping and twinkling of your soul.


¡ASK A MEXICAN! BY GUSTAVO ARELLANO, themexican@askamexican.net Dear Mexican: This is the second rant I’ve felt the need to send to you. I don’t know if readers are allowed “seconds,” but here it goes: Much has been said about the terrible things happening to the United States and its citizens because of the Mexican drug cartels. But what’s the difference between the modern-day cartels and the Big Four of the period between 1492 and 1775? I refer you to the kings of England, France, Portugal and Spain, who invaded the Americas during the above-noted period. The invaders didn’t bring cocaine, pot or meth, but they brought various diseases that, if I read history correctly, led to the death of many thousands of native peoples. And, of course, they brought their heavyweight weapon, the one I believe that Lenin called the opiate of the masses: religion. Today, many people and our economy are hurt by today’s cartels, and I’m not defending them in any way, but it strikes me that the cartels of today are pikers compared to their predecessors, who killed an untold number of native peoples and stole a continent. Mexica Tiahui! Dear Wab: Sloppy seconds are always welcome here, cabrón! It was Marx who dropped the line about religion, not Lenin (he wrote of religion that it’s “a sort of spiritual booze, in which the slaves of capital drown their human image, their demand for a life more or less worthy of man”), and the natives were muy religious, but otherwise, your analysis doesn’t go far enough. You forgot to mention how, like the cartels, the conquistadors fought each other for trade routes, killing each other and innocents in the process. How they demanded tribute from villagers, and terrorized them with public displays of brutality to keep them in line. How the conquistadors built empires that enriched only themselves, and created serfs out of the people they didn’t bribe into submission. The only real difference between the conquistadors and drug cartels is that the former did it in the name of Christ—and even the narcos aren’t so pendejo as to pull that card. Does it make any sense to you that, in some cities in Mexico, there are statues of Spanish conquistadors? After all, these were the same people

who believed that they were superior to the Mexicans, so they had to force their ways on them—and then there’s the whole slaughtering of thousands of Mexicans, too. Lies My Maestro Told Me Dear Wab: Of course it does: While the conquistadors raped and murdered countless indigenous folks, they represent order and progress to Mexico’s elite, the very people who have the money to erect statues and are more than proud to claim direct ancestry to the barbarians. Witness the furor that happened last year, when the city of Mérida in the Yucatan erected a statue to its founder, the conquistador Francisco de Montejo. Even though Montejo laid waste to the Mayans back in the 16th century, and even though the descendants of the vanquished protested loudly, the city’s elites erected the statue. The same controversy happens whenever someone commemorates Juan de Oñate, the conquistador who swung his sword through New Mexico, much to the delight of the Hispaños who claim no Injun blood in their veins—but to the horror of everyone else. But it’s not just an elite-Mexican thing to side with the cruel—just look at the Southern love for the Confederacy. Ask the Mexican at themexican@askamexican. net; be his fan on Facebook; follow him on Twitter @gustavoarellano; or ask him a video question at youtube.com/askamexicano!

DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2011

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S AVA G E L O V E BY DAN SAVAGE, mail@savagelove.net

I’m a man who recently started seeing a wonderful woman. Like me, she’s divorced. While my ex-wife left me for another man, my girlfriend’s ex-husband was controlling and abusive. Our relationship is the opposite—emotionally, psychologically and sexually. Here’s the thing: His abusive behavior is my kink—spanking. In all my past relationships, spanking was light, playful and consensual; with her ex, it was about pain and humiliation to the point of tears and bruising. She knows about my kink (as a Savage Love reader, I knew to bring it up after a couple of weeks) and understands that my motivations around spanking are completely different from her ex’s, but she has zero interest in anything approaching fetish play—and that’s fine, because I feel so connected to her that I don’t need my kink indulged to feel fulfilled. But I find myself feeling guilty for having the kink in the first place. The thought of her enduring what she did brings me to tears. How do I get past this? Lacking A Clever Acronym

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If your girlfriend’s ex-husband had manipulated or bullied her into vaginal intercourse—if he had repeatedly and brutally raped her vaginally during their terrible, awful, no good, very bad marriage—would you feel guilty about an interest in consensual, vanilla, missionary, penis-in-vagina intercourse? No. You hopefully would have reacted in a similarly compassionate manner, LACA, after learning about her sexual history. You would have been willing to stick to oral, mutual masturbation and whatever else your new girlfriend was comfortable exploring and capable of enjoying. And you would have looked forward to the day when she felt ready to enjoy sensuous, consensual and mutually pleasurable vaginal intercourse again. And if that day never arrived, well, then perhaps you would have been willing to forgo vaginal intercourse for the rest of your life to be with her. But you wouldn’t be sitting there feeling like some sort of monster for being aroused by—and for having enjoyed—consensual, vanilla, missionary, penis-in-vagina intercourse with other women. Your willingness to drop your harmless kink is evidence that your priorities are in order, LACA. Your heart is in the right place; your cowboy hat is white, etc. Any time you start feeling bad about your kink, just remind yourself that consensual kink isn’t abuse for the same reason consensual vaginal intercourse isn’t rape: Because it’s consensual. You can love this woman, LACA, and make this relatively small sacrifice for this woman (spanking ain’t vaginal), without having to shame yourself or retroactively define all your past spanking experiences as abusive. My boyfriend of five years had a one-night stand with a much-younger woman. In some ways, it’s a good thing—we’re having conversations we should have had a long time ago; he’s seeing a therapist to deal with his issues (his idea, not mine); and somehow, I know more than ever that I want to be with him. (I’ve always been the one in every relationship with one foot out the door.) Two questions: 1. I recently hit the age where I’ve started to worry about looking older, and it’s been devastating to know that not only did he cheat on me, but that he did so with a much-younger woman. He assures me he’s attracted to me, but how can I believe that now? 2. The younger woman sent me—and other people in our lives—an explicit, lengthy e-mail detailing everything they did. (I hate to paint this as “bitchez be crazy,” but sometimes bitchez be crazy.) It’s not how I found out, but it certainly hasn’t helped. Ironically, our sex life has only gotten better since I found out exactly what they did—it turns out that we are both far more GGG than the other ever knew. But sometimes when we’re in bed, I’ll flash on something she wrote and the vivid mental

images her letter cooked up in my head, and it sears me. Dealing with that pain out of the bedroom has been hard enough. It’s devastating that it’s now with me in the bedroom as well. How can I deal with this? Salve It, Please 1. LTRs are only possible if we’re willing take “yes” for an answer. He says yes, he loves you, and you will yourself to believe him; he says yes, he’s having sex with you because he’s attracted to you, and you will yourself to believe him; he says he strayed and is sorry and swears he won’t do it again … and you will yourself to believe him. And while the passage of time makes monsters of us all, SIP, it can strengthen a sexual connection even as sex itself becomes less important when weighed against everything else your LTR is or should be about. In the words of singer-songwriter Tim Minchin: “Love is made more powerful by the ongoing drama of shared experience and synergy, and symbiotic empathy, or something like that.” 2. Angry cheated partner: “You did what with that person? I would’ve done that with you! And I have kinks and fantasies, too, you know!” Contrite cheating partner: “I was afraid to ask you to do that! I was afraid you would hate me— wait, you have kinks and fantasies? What are they?” Conversations like that one are why affairs—if the relationship survives the betrayal—sometimes kick-start a couple’s sex life. With all the kink-andwhatever-else cards on the table, the couple starts going at it like they have nothing to lose—because in that moment, when breaking up is on the table, they actually don’t have anything to lose. As for those troubling mental images: The passage of time is your body’s enemy on the physical-perfection front—and his, too—but it’s your best friend on the searing-mental-images front, SIP. The more time you two spend doing, enjoying and perfecting X, Y and Z sex acts, the more X, Y and Z becomes about you two and your connection. As you take ownership over X, Y and Z, and over each other again, the mental images will come to you less often; they’ll be less vivid; and gradually they’ll cease. Give it time. A letter in a recent column was from a guy who’s trying to figure out how to get into gay BDSM. You suggested some advice from a gay BDSM blogger— Ben In Leather Land (tinyurl.com/bensten)—and it was awesome. Do you have any suggestions of similar blogs for women into BDSM? Looking Lady Sex writer, blogger, thinker and haver Tristan Taormino, who is publishing a new book about BDSM and kinky sex (The Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play and the Erotic Edge), recommends fetish-icon Midori’s column in SexIs magazine (tinyurl.com/edenmidori) for women who are just beginning to explore kink. HEY, EVERYBODY We’re seeking sordid and tragic stories of holiday sex for an upcoming episode of the Savage Lovecast. Ever been caught having sex at Mom and Dad’s over the holidays? Ever put a “For Grandma, from Santa!” card on a wrapped box that contained a sex toy you bought for someone else? Did your older brothers stick your vibrator in the tree before a Christmas party, and you had to leave it there because reaching into the tree to remove it would only attract attention to it? Call and record your story at (206) 201-2720! Please keep it under three minutes, if at all possible! Find the Savage Lovecast (my weekly podcast) every Tuesday at thestranger.com/savage, and follow me @fakedansavage on Twitter.


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NEWS OF THE WEIRD BY CHUCK SHEPHERD Send your Weird News to Chuck Shepherd, PO Box 18737, Tampa, Fla., 33679 weirdnews@earthlink.net or go to www.newsoftheweird.com

Chinese Educational Values To get to their school, 80 children (ages 6 to 17) in the mountaintop village of Pili, China, near the borders with Tajikistan and Afghanistan, make a 120-mile journey that includes 50 miles on foot or by camel. The most-dangerous parts of the route are an inches-wide path cut into a cliff (with more than a 1,000-foot drop), a 600-foot-long zipline drop, and the crossings of four chilly rivers (which is easier in winter when they are frozen solid). The kids must make the chaperoned treks four times a year—coming and going for each of two long sessions. According to one teacher, Ms. Su, the kids generally enjoy the adventure. The government is building a road to the village, but it will not be finished until 2013. Cultural Diversity • Globally (except in Japan), family-run businesses underperform those run by professional managers. However, Japanese corporations often seem to have a talented son to take over for his father. The main reason for that, according to an August Freakonomics Radio report, is that the family scions usually recruit an ideal “son,” and then adopt him—often encouraging a daughter to marry the man. (Japanese adage: “You can’t choose your sons, but you can choose your sons-in-law.”) If the man is already married, sometimes he and his wife will both get adopted. In fact, while 98 percent of U.S. adoptions are of children, 98 percent of Japan’s are of adults. • At an October ceremony in the Satara district in India’s Maharashtra state, 285 girls were allowed to change their names, as each of them had originally been named the Hindi word “Nakusa,” which translates to “unwanted” (expressing their parents’ disappointment at not having had a son). In Satara, only 881 girls are born for every 1,000 boys; the lower numbers are reportedly the result of abortion, given the expense of raising a girl (whose family is expected to pay for any wedding and give a dowry to the groom’s family). • Swedish judges get tough: (1) A court dismissed charges against two 20-year-old men in October, accused of having bared a passed-out, 18-year-old woman’s breasts at a party and taken photographs. Since the woman was not “aware” that she was being molested, the act was not a crime, ruled the Stockholm District Court. (2) Also in October, the Falun District Court in central Sweden convicted 23 women of possession of “large quantities” of child pornography, but gave them suspended sentences, merely fining them in amounts as low as the equivalent of $375. Their male “ringleader” was sentenced to one year in prison. • Dubai is a city of towering, architecturally brilliant skyscrapers, but since all were built only in the last several decades, the city’s central sewer system has not been able to keep up. Consequently, reported NPR’s Fresh Air in November, only a few are hooked up to the 62 WWW.TuCsON WEEKLY.COM

municipal system, and the remainder must hire fleets of tanker trucks to carry away the waste. The trucks then must queue up, sometimes for 24 hours at a time, to dispose of it at treatment plants. Latest Religious Messages • Factory worker Billy Hyatt, who was fired in 2009 by north Georgia plastics company Pliant Corp., filed a lawsuit in August alleging illegal religious discrimination. Pliant (now called Berry Plastics) required its employees to wear stickers indicating the number of consecutive accident-free days, and March 12, 2009, was the 666th day. When Hyatt refused to wear “the mark of the beast” (embracing that number, he thought, would condemn him to hell), he was suspended and then fired. • The International House of Prayer in Kansas City, Mo., recently celebrated 12 consecutive years of around-the-clock musical praying, which Pastor Mike Bickle and his evangelical congregation believe is necessary to fight the devil’s continuous infiltration of the realms of power in society (business, media, government, etc.). “To keep the music going,” according to an October Los Angeles Times dispatch, “the church has 25 bands playing throughout the week in two-hour sets,” divided between “devotional” music and “intercessions,” in which God is petitioned to help some cause or place. Bickle claims that there are “thousands” of 24/7 prayer groups in the world. • Israelis experience attacks not just from the outside, but from its own ultra-Orthodox communities (about 10 percent of the country, and growing), whose activists have jeered and stoned “immodestly” dressed women and girls (as young as 6) on the street, defaced women’s images on billboards, forced illegal gender segregation in public facilities (including buses and sidewalks), and vandalized businesses that treat women as equals (such as one ice cream shop—since female customers lick the cones in public). An especially violent minority, the Sikrikim, employ some tactics reminiscent of the Ku Klux Klan in America. Questionable Judgments Each August in Urakawa, Japan, a “hallucination and delusion competition” takes place among visiting alcoholics and sufferers of mental disorders, who in principle are helped by bonding with fellow patients and revealing their failures and successes. The Bethel Festival, named for its sponsor, brings about 600 people together for onstage presentations (sometimes in the form of song or dance) and awards a grand prize to a standout visitor— one year, to a woman who lived for four days in a public restroom after a voice in her head told her to, and in another year, to a man who had overcome a 35-year stretch of never straying more than two yards from his mother. (Some mental-disorder professionals believe the festival is too-easily mockable by insensitive outsiders.)

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For answers, call 1-900-285-5656, $1.49 a minute; or, with a credit card, 1-800-814-5554. Annual subscriptions are available for the best of Sunday crosswords from the last 50 years: 1-888-7-ACROSS. AT&T users: Text NYTX to 386 to download puzzles, or visit nytimes.com/mobilexword for more information. Online subscriptions: Todayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s puzzle and more than 2,000 past puzzles, nytimes.com/crosswords ($39.95 a year). Share tips: nytimes.com/wordplay. Crosswords for young solvers: nytimes.com/learning/xwords.

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www.tucsonweekly.com DECEMBER 15 - 21, 2011

TuCsONWEEKLY

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The Owl and project helps Panther refugee children adjust to Tucson A STORY IN PHOTOS

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| PAGE 16

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Tucson Weekly 12-15-2011  

Tucson Weekly Dec.15, 2011