Network 1424 Central Avenue NE East Grand Forks, MN 56721 1‐800‐820‐7263 Building strong families. Connecting people and resources. Strengthening communities.
JUNE 2014 Family Voice and Choice Network Tri-Valley Opportunity Council, Inc 1-800-820-7263 ● Nancy Ramon ● Maureen Hams email@example.com firstname.lastname@example.org (218) 779-3009 (218) 689-2184
Dear Families and Friends of Family Voice & Choice Network: School is out and summer is here!! We hope that everyone will enjoy the summer and plan some fun activities with your children. We want to update you with some of the services we are working on: Local Advisory Council –our next meeting will be Monday, June 9th at 6:oopm at the TriValley Opportunity Council main office in Crookston. We are looking for parents who have an interest in the mental health needs for our children. We meet quarterly and work on ways to improve the services our children need. Please join us. Contact us at 1-800-8207263 for an address and directions. Parents Forever class: Our next class is July 18th and 19th and they are held in Crookston. This is an educational class that is required to parents who have children who are in the divorce process. Give us a call to receive a registration form. Tri-Valley Opportunity Council Family Voice and Choice and Inter-County Community Council have partnered in the Employment & Training Program. Nancy Ramon is the job training specialist for Polk and Norman counties. The programs that she is working with are: WIA youth program—for students ages 14 to 18 years old who need assistance with employment. WIA older youth program—for ages 19 to 21 years old with job placement and further education. Out of school student—for those youth who are no longer in school who need assistance in employment. Senior Program—employment program for seniors over the age of 55 years. There are eligibility requirements for all these programs. Please contact Nancy for further information at 1-800-820-7263.
Family Voice and Choice Network is supported by Northwest Minnesota Foundation and Northwest Minnesota Council of Collaboratives .
THE IMPORTANCE OF ONE ON ONE TIME WITH YOUR KIDS From Inspiredtoaction.com Spending intentional un-interrupted time with your child has infinite rewards. No matter the quantity or quality of the toys they may have, it will never compare to simply being with you. Do I spend every waking moment with my two young boys? No-far from it. I believe in the value of teaching a child to have independent play as well. After all, I’ve got a house to maintain, adult relationships to foster, as well as pursue my individual interests and business pursuits. I do, however, make an intentional effort to spend several regular slots of time with them daily. Child development experts suggest that these little bits of “Special Time” will add up to an increased trust and emotional/relational bond that will enable them to feel secure and less likely to act out negatively for attention. I have certainly seem this to be true in my home. Strive to have several 5 to 15 minutes of “Special Time” rather than engaging for one long block of time with toddlers and preschoolers. Here are some tips to get started:
First, tell your child, “We are going to have special time together.” Let them know when to expect it. (After you’re finished a few chores, after school, or after dinner.)
Ask, “What are some things you would like to do for our special time here at home?” Give them some choices if they cannot think of anything.
Tell them when yo9u will have the next special time.
Tell them when you are having special time. “This is my special time with you.” Say something positive like, “I like doing things with you.”
Warn them before the time is up and say…”Soon it is going to be baby’s turn...or mommies turn.”
Tell them when the next special time will be. Remind them to be thinking about what they would like to do.
Later, remind them about the special time you had together, and that another special time is coming.
Do not take special time away as a punishment for behavior earlier in the day. Being able to count on special time with you provides them support and sense of unconditional love and connection.
“Special Time” provides children with some structure way of knowing when you’re available. It will meet the indwelt need they have to fell connected and to have a security about their place in the family. With sufficient positive interaction, they won’t have to act out negatively in order to get your attention. Knowing you’ll spend time with them at planned times throughout the day will encourage better independent play as well.
10 STRENGTHS MEN BRING TO PARENTING (adapted from “Working with Fathers” by the Minnesota Fathering Alliance Each man is different, and each man brings different strengths to the job of being a father.. This is a list of some strengths that are often found in dads. 1. They know how to play physically—rough and tumble play—children think it’s fun and learn different skills from physical play. 2. Dads are often tall and strong. Kids love the feeling of sitting high on their dad’s shoulders, or being safe kept in dad’s arms. 3. Dads that aren’t around their child as much as mom, can give a fresh view of a problem that mom and child are having. 4. Sometimes dad’s lower voice can get kids attention when disciplining. 5. Some dads are less fussy about messes, and nurture their child’s creativity by letting them play in the mud, or jump on the couch pillows. 6. Dads can introduce their children to the activities that they love: fishing, reading, fixing things with tools, cooking, car, sports. 7. Sometimes dads encourage their children to try new things. 8. Dads can have a great sense of humor and share it with their children. 9. Dads can be playful. Children see dad and think “time to play.” 10. Dads often have high expectations for their children. They give their children a “you can do it” attitude. Are some of these true for you? What are some other strengths you bring to parenting? Remember—YOU ARE IMPORTANT IN YOUR CHILD’S LIFE!
HAPPY FATHER’S DAY
Talking with Your Kids about Money (from ParentFurther) In some families, talking about money can be more uncomfortable than talking about sex. Many parents don’t know how to approach the topic of money, and some avoid it altogether. By starting the discussion early, you can make it easier to talk about this tough topic later, when your child is making larger purchases, thinking about getting a job, or beginning financial planning for college. Practice smart spending—talk with your children about how you make
spending choices based on more than just affordability. Use language like “We’re not going to spend our money that way because…”or “It’s not a good value because..,” rather than just saying, “It’s too expensive,” which may give the impression that you would buy it if you could afford it. Do— Bring your kids with you to the bank. If you’re making a deposit in a sav-
ings account, talk about the importance of saving for a “rainy day.” Create learning opportunities—If you’re refinancing your mortgage, you
have an opportunity to discuss the concept of interest and the importance of paying off loan balances quickly. When you’re taking out a car loan, talk about how loans allow you to pay for things that you don’t have the money for, but you end up paying more in the long run. Honesty as the best policy—If you are facing financial difficulty, be honest
with your children. You don’t need to worry them with all the details, but it is helpful for them to learn that money isn’t magical—it doesn’t appear when you need it. Stress wants vrs needs—Many kids– especially young ones have difficulty
differentiating between wants and needs. When your child says she “needs” something, ask if she really needs it, or if she just wants it. Make sure your child understands the difference, and start paying attention to what you’re saying and the example of setting-for example, do you really need an expensive cup of coffee to get you through the morning? Keep an open dialogue—When you’re out shopping, talk with your kids
about why you make the purchases you do. Are you influenced by advertising? Pricing? The quality of the product? How you choose on product over the other? Highlight the positive—Many financially savvy practices, such as buying
secondhand, donating old clothes to a thrift store, and reusing and recycling goods, are also good for the environment. Point out you are saving money by doing these things.
SUMMER SAFETY Hydration is a must for summer safety. Plan ahead and make sure your kids drink enough water throughout the day and night to replenish fluids lost during their activities. For most people, water will be sufficient enough to keep you properly hydrated. Watch for feeling light-headed or dizzy, feeling overheated, weak of tired or if they develop a headache or cramps. A good general rule is to drink half your body weight in ounces of water every day!
Bug Bites and Stings Although stings and bites can be irritating and in most instances they disappear the next day, some kids can be allergy to some bites. These are some signs and symptoms : Of a mild reaction—red bumps, itchiness and mild swelling Of a sever allergic reaction—swelling of the face or mouth, difficulty swallowing or speaking, chest tightness, wheezing or difficulty breathing, also dizziness or fainting. What to do: If there are signs of sever reaction:
if your child has injectable epinephrine, give it right away and call 911.
If there are no signs of a sever reaction:
if the stinger is visible, remove it as quickly as possible by scraping the skin horizontally with the edge of a credit card or your fingernail. Wash the area with soap and water and apply ice or a cool wet cloth to the area to relieve pain and swelling. BE SAFE THIS SUMMER
Websites for your family A lot of resources and information is available for children and families on the internet. You need to be very careful about information you find and very cautious about websites, but there are many quality sites out there. Here are a few sites you can look at : www.pacer.org– resource and information center for families and youth with disabilities, bullying resources www.nami.org– a mental health advocacy organization dedicated to improving the lives of individuals and families www.macmh.org-training and resources for children and families promoting positive mental health www.samhsa.gov– resources and information regarding substance abuse, mental health and services for children and families www.health.state.mn.us/mcshn– a website for Minnesota children with special health needs and their families www.fape.org-information about IDEA, special education and disability issues www.mofas.org—Minnesota Organization on Fetal Alchol www.parentsknow.state.mn.us– resources and information for parents www.how-to-stop-bullying.com— resources and activities on preventing bullying and how to handle bullying
WANT TO CONNECT WITH YOUR KIDS? (by ParentFurther) Shared family activities lay a foundation for family strengths. ParentFurther held a webinar on the importance of family routines and activities that families can do together. Routines and activities can present great opportunities for family members to enjoy each othersâ€™ company and deepen their bonds. Participants were asked to share activities that their family enjoy dong together. They shared numerous ideas that can help you make the most of your family time. 1. drive places together 2. cook meals together 3. go to movies together 4. go camping together 5. go to a park together 6. go fishing together 7. explore nature together 8. go to the mall for a favorite treat 9. create new recipes together 10. take walks together 11. complete chores together 12. just hang out talking 13. play sports together 14. tell each other stories 15. grow a garden together 16. read to each other 17. ride bikes together 18. go to church together 19. go grocery shopping together 20. exercise together 21. go swimming together 22. invite a neighbor family to share a meal with you 23. play cards together 24. play board games 25. visit grandparents 26. do puzzles together 26. work on a hobby together 27. enjoy time outside 28. create photo stories about your family history 29. play music 30. JUST BE TOGETHER!!
Title VI of the Civil Rights Act of 1964 This is an Equal Opportunity Program. Discrimination in this program is prohibited by Federal law. It is illegal to discriminate against any person because of race, color or national origin. To file a complaint of discrimination, write to: USDA Director, Office of the Civil Rights, Room 326-W Whitten Building, 14th and Independence Ave S.W. , Washington, DC, 20250-9410 or call (202) 720-5964.
June 2014 Tri-Valley Family Voice and Choice Newsletter