The Racist Bullying Crisis: Why 54% of Asian American Children Are Targeted g by y Bullies
Hey guys, it’s JT Tran, your friendly neighborhood Asian Playboy Playboy, with a more serious article today on a topic that ((according g to one study y I’ll talk about later) at least half of us have faced in one form or another – the Asian American bullying crisis.
A certain YouTube video is trending right now about an Asian guy getting badly beaten by six or seven other guys. Just as with the news of Private Danny y Chen’s death, people rallied to the side of the man being attacked. It seems our nation’s youth is tired of the bullying and the victimizing, and that struck t k a chord h d with ith me, because, b like lik many young Asian men, I was bullied as well well. Copyright: http://www.abcsofattraction.com
When I was growing up in the South (Texas to be exact), exact) I was “fortunate” fortunate enough to attend an academy for academically y gifted g children. It was “fortunate” fortunate because it also painted me with a huge fourth grade target on my back.
ď śAs I walked every morning to go to this academy I would cross paths with a academy, blonde, Caucasian boy going to a different p public school. ď śHe definitely lived on the other side of the tracks as his clothes were worn and dirt seemed to be his constant companion.
And, each day, as our paths collided, he would push me and call me a gook, gook a chink, or a slant. I would tell my parents and my y teachers. They y said that violence isn’t the solution and just avoid him.
“Take the higher g road,” , they y said piously. p y
So I would try to avoid him and cross the street but he always made a point to street, cross the street and confront me. I still don’t understand why he did so, but he seemed to make it his routine to go out of his way to shove me down each day. Each time I regained my balance, I felt a sense of shame.
n fact, at one point, he raised his fists in a mock punch and I raised mine to defend myself. This just incensed him even more and I went to school with a bloody nose. Why didn’t I push him back? Why didn’t I do something about this? I wondered about these questions and my actions, or, rather, lack thereof, and I started to feel bad about myself. myself Copyright: http://www.abcsofattraction.com
ď śYears later, in high school, I got into another situation with a different bully. bully He was much bigger than me being six foot tall,, so that made me an easy y target. ď śWhen he started picking on me I did the same thing as I had always been taught. I passively accepted it and tried to ignore it. Copyright: http://www.abcsofattraction.com
However, one day I just became completely fed up with the situation and I decided to take action. He started making g fun of my y mother and called her “Connie Chung.”
I had had enough. g
I pretty much had to jump to meet him eye to eye, eye but I took a swing and punched him – right in the face. Looking back on it,, I’m glad g my y teacher saw this and stepped in and stopped the fight, because he would have completely kicked my ass, but I don’t feel f bad about it. E Even th though h I gott into i t a lot l t off trouble t bl with my parents for getting detention over it it, I don’t don t regret it. it Copyright: http://www.abcsofattraction.com
I had done something that I had never done before: I made a stand for myself and my sense of self-respect. Unlike my previous experience with a bully, I didn’t feel that lingering sense of shame. Instead, I felt vindicated. I felt that my actions were justified. I felt I had done the right thing by standing up for myself, lf and d that th t gave me a new sense off confidence and empowerment I didn’t have before. before Copyright: http://www.abcsofattraction.com
Now, my Asian brethren, I’m not endorsing punching the lights out of any guy that looks at you funny, but I do believe y you should stand up p for yourself y – not only because it takes care of the situation at hand but because it will make you feel f like a better person. Violence isn’t always the solution and resorting ti to t violence i l can be b very dangerous. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’tt stand up for yourself and take shouldn some sort of action. Copyright: http://www.abcsofattraction.com
I remember Brooks (one of my female AMWW writers and former Playboy model) telling me how she was at Bennigans g ((or a similar restaurant)) with her Asian boyfriend. As she went to the bar, she overhead a waitress talking about Asian men, how Asian men had small penises and weren’t good in bed. Copyright: http://www.abcsofattraction.com
Brooks COMPLETELY flipped and started shouting at the top of her lungs. lungs She made a complete scene scene, got the management’s attention and ended up getting the racist waitress fired. That’s a perfect example of not resorting g to violence,, but still standing g up for yourself (or in this case, her boyfriend). And not only that, it made a socially effective message: Copyright: http://www.abcsofattraction.com
Being racist is NOT OK Informed everyone around her of that fact Debunked the “small small penis penis” Asian stereotype for all to see Got the racist person fired from her position Which probably started making the waitress rethink her attitude and opinions But is Asian bullying a crisis? Bullying happens all the time to everyone, right? Copyright: http://www.abcsofattraction.com
Studies show that 54% of Asian kids get bullied be it physically bullied, physically, mentally mentally, or emotionally. That is astoundingly higher than the national average g of 20% of children. That means that 1 out of very 2 Asian man you know, has been bullied before f in his life. f That’s nuts! And it’s more than the b ll i bullying crisis i i th thatt gay/homosexual /h l tteens face, but has gotten all the news coverage and support from the celebrities. Copyright: http://www.abcsofattraction.com
ď śBut more than that, going back to Private Danny Chen (where it was just recently announced that one of his attackers was only y getting g g 30 days y of jjail-time)) and the military, Asian Americans in the military have the HIGHEST SUICIDE RATE of any group or ethnicity
(“Soldiers of Asian descent have dramatically higher suicide rates than other racial groups. Their risk is double or triple p that of other soldiers,, and four times higher in the war zone.”). Let me repeat that: the ASIANS HAVE THE HIGHEST SUICIDE RATE IN THE MILITARY.
Danny Chen has called a “gook,” “chink,” “dragon dragon lady lady” and unfortunately he didn didn’tt know how defend himself or stand up for himself against g these racists that might g have made the bullies back down. A lot of it has to do with how we’re raising our children and the fact that we’re such an easy target for people to take out their racist, prejudiced beliefs. Copyright: http://www.abcsofattraction.com
ď śIn fact, there was a school that had so many racist bullying events and the Asian Americans feared so much for their safety y that they y had to stage g a strike and REFUSE to go to school. ď śYes, Asians refusing to go to school until the American establishment could guarantee their safety. We are the most prone group to be targeted by bullies and racists racists. Copyright: http://www.abcsofattraction.com
ď śSo yes, I definitely believe there is an Asian bullying crisis. crisis ď śAnother study shows that an overwhelming 99% of Filipinos have been victims of racism in the past year, but that the majority j y of them decided to take action about it by either standing up for themselves or reporting it to authorities. Aft doing After d i so, they th too, t just j t like lik I did, did felt a new sense of confidence and selfworth By taking action, worth. action they felt better about themselves as a person. Copyright: http://www.abcsofattraction.com
Bottomline is that CONFRONTING RACISM BOOSTS SELF SELF-ESTEEM ESTEEM. You don’t have to take my word for, just check out the p psychology y gy study y “Filipino p Americans and Racism: A Multiple Mediation Model of Coping” for yourself. Believe it or not, bullying affects your confidence, self-esteem and self-image. Whi h iin tturn affects Which ff t your dating d ti life. lif
I don’t mean it in the clear-cut example of AMOGing, AMOGing where another guy may try to assert some sort of dominance over you and the girl y g you’re y talking g to,, making g some snide joke about Asians and trying to impress her. It’s deeper than that. If you are or have ever been a victim of bullying and failed to do anything about it your confidence it, fid has h mostt likely lik l been b deflated. If you couldn’t stand up to your bully you probably felt ashamed bully, ashamed, like I did. Copyright: http://www.abcsofattraction.com
This lack of confidence can carry over to your adult life life, where you may feel unworthy of the beautiful woman at the club or the cute g girl that g goes to y your gym. While a more confident man might strike up the courage and ask her out, you’re sitting back and wishing you could do the same. Copyright: http://www.abcsofattraction.com
ď śGentlemen, I now challenge you. The next time you feel like a victim of bullying or any racial comments, slurs or incidents,, I challenge g you y to make a stand. ď śI challenge you to take action. I challenge you to do what is right.
Do not stand idly by and let it slide, because you will feel ashamed, ashamed depressed and angry. Have enough selfworth to realize that no one deserves to be bullied – you included. By doing so, you will gain that sense of empowerment you’ve been craving. You will feel f the confidence flow through your body.
You will know what it’s like to be strong. And you will finally feel vindicated, vindicated as I did, when you stand up for yourself and what is right. right