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2 0 11 NOVEMBER 5772

Touro Announces this Year’s Grant Recipients

INSIDE This Issue

By Jed Brandes, Chairman, Student Financial Aid

Ilana Yanku Golf Cart GPS not working? Tournament results page 4

Peter Kilmartin page 5

Jennifer Dinerman

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ouro’s Student Financial Aid program continues to be a popular benefit for our members’ families. This year, the committee reviewed 19 applications for grants and loans. As in recent years, three $3,000 grants were awarded. An additional eight students received $3,000 interest-free loans. The recipients of the grants are: Jennifer Dinerman, Mirah Sand and Ilana Yanku. Jennifer Dinerman, daughter of Brother Norman Dinerman, is an Elementary and Special Education student at Rhode Island College.

Mirah Sand

She is entering her junior year. Her work in the community has included advocacy for the Scituate Animal Shelter and the Scituate Early Learning Center. She has also volunteered at several of our community’s elementary schools as a tutor and mentor, often working with developmentally challenged children. Mirah Sand has just begun her senior year at Bard College at Simon Rock. She is pursuing a dual major in Social Action and Theater. Mirah is the daughter of Brother Bob Sand. Continued on page 5- Grant Recipients

A Sense of Belonging By Robert Miller, Chairman of the Board ne of the many things common to Because people helped one another to ensure their humans across cultures is the need to survival by: Hunting together to capture large prey would belong and be accepted by others. This is one of the reasons people seek to spend time have been impossible for one human alone. Many bonding with family, friends, hobby-buddies, years later, people worked together on farms, being sports fans, religious congregations and fraternal able to grow and share a wide range of nutritious food thanks to the “many hands make light work” organizations like Touro. Social psychologists have been studying our principle. Delegating community jobs, enabling the need for belonging for well over a century and one of the most famous studies on this subject was division of labor, where it was typical for the done by Abraham Maslow, who in 1943 proposed women to cook the fresh kills from a hunt, and that this human need to belong was one of the five freeing up the males to collect more food for the basic needs required for self-actualization. In fact, community. This saved time and allowed more after physiological needs (like food and sleep) and food to be gathered, and therefore secured longer safety needs, he ranked the need for belonging as survival. Reciprocity of helping one another build the next level up in his “Hierarchy of Needs.” As will be seen, without belongingness, not shelter meant that the task was done with increased only would we never make it past infanthood, but speed and ease than if done alone. Safety in numbers meant that together, it is likely that we would be no-where nearly as people protected one another and were able to evolved as we are today! It all boils down to: “Because belonging helps save one another. If you’ve got more than one pair of eyes watching your back, it definitely enhances us to survive.” In the history of mankind, social people were chances of survival. If you belong to a group and Continued on page 2 - Chairman far more likely to survive than hermits. Why?

O "Wall's World" page 5

Golf League results page 6

New Member Contest Announcement page 6

~1~


Chairman - Continued from page 1

From the Chairman By Robert Miller, Chairman of the Board have an important role to play in the group, it increases others’ motivation to protect you. As infants we are among the most helpless babies in the animal kingdom. Human babies rely on their parents to provide every basic need, from food and shelter to love and affection. If human babies didn’t have the internal need to bond with their parents, and vice versa, there was no chance that babies would be able to survive on their own. In order to give babies the instinct to belong to their parents, and to ensure that parents look out for their young, we’ve evolved to secrete neurochemicals like oxytocin, which drive our need to belong to one another because it makes “being together” feel good, triggering off feelings of happiness and love. Since babyhood, we learn that belonging feels safe and good, and so we seek it out later in life, trying to recapture it by surrounding ourselves with feelings of belonging to family groups, friend groups, partner-pairs and wider community groups. Today, while evolutionary and developmental reasons are still valid, one of the main forces driving our need for belonging is “reward and punishment.” The reward of bailing one another out in times of trouble: If you are helped in times of trouble, you are far more likely to want to reciprocate and help others who are in a similar position in the future. In 50AD, Roman slaves had an emergency fund to aid fellow slaves in need. Similarly today, our sense of belonging motivates charities that help those in need. If you were banished from the community, chances of survival are much reduced without this charitable give-and-take that comes with belonging. A reward of utilizing other people’s specialized strengths and skills to allow better progress of the group is that it applies to every industry. One example of society groups using different people’s skills is as follows: If it wasn’t for people skilled in electricity, scholars in society wouldn’t have light to study with, and if it wasn’t for scholars finding cures for diseases, a lot of us would be killed off by disease. If everyone fended for themselves, everyone would focus on gaining general knowledge needed for survival, and there would be no time or opportunity to specialize in any one field. Progress in every field would be hindered severely. We have more knowledge as a group than individually, and this pooled knowledge is known as “trans active memories.” OK, so maybe getting information about a good book or movie won’t be a matter of life or death, but getting the information about where the local burger joint is might be! By exchanging information with others, better decisions can be made for important things in life that do affect survival, and this can not only increase survival rates but also can help society progress and evolve at a faster rate. It is because of the view that groups form better decisions than individual people that we have democracy and juries in courts. ~2~

Being needed gives meaning to life: Feeling needed when you belong to part of the group can give more meaning to your life and increases desire for survival. Ideally though, it’s best to have your own strong internal meaning of life that is independent of external things like belongingness; otherwise your reason for living is very vulnerable. Your belongingness to a group can boost your self-esteem, especially if the group is doing well. When you feel you belong, it comes with feelings of being wanted and loved, and this makes you feel more valuable. Ideally, we should all have this feeling that we are valuable from within, even if we don’t have a sense of belongingness. This can be achieved through internal work on confidence and self-love. Your group can give you a sense of identity: Ideally, your sense of identity should come from within you, and not from external locations. However, many take comfort in a group giving them a sense of identity. When asked “Who am I?” lots of people would identify with their religion, their race, their profession – to all groups they belong. However your true identity isn’t any of these things. It is something unique to you and can only be found inside yourself. Belongingness gives you feelings of moral support from which you can draw strength. Ideally we’d want to draw strength from within rather than be dependent on others, but until we strengthen ourselves, belongingness to groups of people with life experience and compassion that can offer comfort can be our rocks in stormy seas. Belonging to a group can give you a direction in life. When you don’t know what you want to do with your life, social comparison and discussion with other group members can help guide you. Groups expressing the same value we want to express help us with self-expression, particularly in people prone to repression. Expression is important for good mental health. Belonging to groups helps us make sense of the world around us. Stereotyping through belongingness to groups helps order the world (although whether it orders the world in a positive or negative way is not so sure!). From a Biblical perspective Man was made, not only as part of a pair (a small group), indicating that it’s God’s wish for Man to be a social creature, but also as a being that belongs to God. Belongingness began when God made Adam and Eve, and this belongingness binds every human being together in the group that is “God’s creations.” For the non-religious, you could say that the fact that we are all human binds every human being into the same group of belongingness. I discovered many of these thoughts while researching material for this edition’s article. I give credit to those who were gracious enough to post their material and allow me to use it here. A Happy and Healthy New Year to you and yours!! Fraternally, Robert D. Miller, Chairman Board of Directors


From the President By Ried Redlich, President, Friendship Lodge s Touro members, we enjoy many benefits, from social gatherings and functions to the more mundane benefits, such as death and sick benefits, college grants and loans, long term care discounts, etc. But how many of us know what is necessary to run an organization like Touro? It takes a great deal of dedication from many individuals to keep Touro functioning at a very high level. We should be proud to know that Touro is one of the finest run organizations that one can find anywhere. All of this is managed by volunteers, except for a single paid position of administrator. When things are going well, we tend to forget that it took someone, or a group of individuals, to make things work so that the membership has a great experience with a lodge meeting, social function, or at a PPAC show. Volunteers are at the heart of what makes Touro tick. Without their extensive time and effort, skill, knowledge and willingness to do what is necessary, we could not be what we are today. These men take their leadership positions at Touro very seriously, always trying to do what is right for Touro and making decisions to benefit the entire membership. Touro has been run for many years by well-meaning and dedicated men. They certainly have provided a framework and method for a successful fraternal association which has lasted nearly 100 years. To our current leaders, and those who have served in the past, we are all grateful for your efforts and thankful for your dedication. It is up to all of us to make sure that we continue the success of this organization for many more years to come. So, if you have not already done so, please consider being a part of the future of Touro. Get involved, become a leader, attend a social committee meeting and suggest new events and venues. Be part of what makes Touro great.

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Social Scene By Lester Nathan, Vice President, Friendship Lodge

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new year has commenced and our committee moves on, planning social events not only for our brothers, but for couples, families and their children as well. We intend to try some new events and venues during the upcoming year, as well as repeating the proven winners. The biggest challenge is finding something which appeals to enough members and is relatively affordable. And as before, we will continue working together with the Communications, Membership and House Committees. Recent events have included: the annual summer event at the Newport Playhouse and Cabaret Theater on August 20th, the monthly lodge meeting on September 21st with A.T. Wall from the R.I. Dept. of Corrections and a bus trip to New York City on October 2nd. On October 26th, we welcomed back ProJo columnist Bill Reynolds, author of several books about basketball, to a meeting hosted by Harmony Lodge. Here’s what’s scheduled for the next few months: The Fall Two-fer takes place on Saturday, November th 12 at the Twelve Acres Restaurant in Smithfield. Providing the evening’s music will be The Rockin’ Soul Horns, a local group sure to get everyone bopping on the dance floor. It’s open to Touro couples and their guests. Friendship Lodge takes its turn to host a lodge meeting on November 16th, with local comedian David DiLorenzo for entertainment. The annual trip to the Foxwoods Casino & MGM Grand in Connecticut is scheduled for Sunday, November 27th. As always, it’s open to Touro members and their guests. Touro’s annual Chanukah Party for members’ children and grandchildren is slated for Sunday, December 18th in the hall. The Bubble Man, Keith Michael Johnson, will entertain the gathering. Harmony Lodge hosts December’s lodge meeting on the 21st. Speaker to be announced. For further information about these events, watch your mail for flyers, check Touro’s website or visit our page on Facebook. (Please contact me or the Chairman if you wish to be added as a group member.) If you can attend our monthly meetings (first Wednesday at 7:30 PM), we’d love to get your input for new events. Every member, whether regular or social, is welcome.

Touro Welcomes 13 New Brothers

Touro welcomes 13 new brothers at our June 29, 2011 meeting. They are (listed alphabetically): John Catainia, Joshua Deaner, Max Dinerman, Norman Getz, Mark Morse, Andrew Shuster, Edward Spater, Andrew Steiner, Scott Steiner, Bernard Trinkle, David Weisman, Sherwin Zaidman and Peter Ziegler. ~3~


“Birdies Away” At This Year’s Golf Tournament By Bruce Weisman

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First Place Touro Team (l-r) are: Jeffrey Davis, Norman Goodman, Bruce Weisman, and Neil Arbor

Second Place Touro Team (l-r) are: Steven Hopfenberg, Joel Cohen, Jerry Tebrow, and Howard Bilow

ouro held its annual Golf Tournament on Monday, July 29, at Cranston Country Club. The golfers were greeted with a coffee-‘an before play, followed by a full dinner after everyone’s rounds were complete. There were two tight races for the top spots in both the Touro Team and Member Guest sides of the greens. Touro Team top honors went to: Bruce Weisman, Norman Goodman, Neil Arbor and Jeff Davis with a team score of 64, followed second by the team of Jerry Tebrow, Howard Bilow, Joel Cohen and Steven Hopfenberg with a score of 68.

Touro Member Closest to the Pin goes to David Brandt (l) Prize presented by Abe Strashnick (r)

Touro Member Longest Drive goes to Howard Myerson (l) Prize presented by Abe Strashnick (r)

Member/Guest top honors went to: Abe Strashnick, Mark Hosford, Joe Dambra and Guido Iaccobbo with a score of 61 followed second by the team, by virtue of a tie with the same score of 61, was Howard Poulten, Bob Marques, Wayne Lima and Joe Marques. Prizes were awarded to members and guest participants for closest to the pin and longest drive to:

Touro Golf Tournament Committee (l-r) are: Joel Cohen, Barry Shaw, Jerry Tebrow and Abe Strashnick

Closest To The Pin, Touro: David Brandt Closest To The Pin, Member/Guest: Guido Iaccobbo Longest Drive, Touro: Howard Myerson

First Place Member/Guest Team (l-r) are: Mark Hosford, Abe Strashnick, Guido Iacobo, and Joe D'Ambra

Second Place Member/Guest Team (l-r) are: Bob Marques, Wayne Lima, Howard Poulten, and Joe Marques

Longest Drive, Guest: Ernie Grilli The afternoon closed out with a raffle drawing awarding rounds of golf, gift certificates and plenty of “green” for all who participated. A big Thank You goes out to the committee of Barry Shaw, Abe Strashnick, Jerry Tebrow and Joel Cohen for putting together another successful Touro event.

Abe Strashnick awards Guest prizes to: Ernie Grilli (l), Longest Drive and Guido Iaccobbo (r), Closest to Pin ~4~


An Evening at Touro with Peter Kilmartin

Wall’s World at the Department of Corrections By Lester Nathan

By Howard Custis

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hode Island’s Attorney General Peter Kilmartin was Touro’s guest speaker as part of another very successful and interesting annual Touro Steak Fry, Wednesday, June 29th. Atty. Gen. Kilmartin immediately set the tone of the evening by requesting that he be called Pete or Peter. He was born, raised and educated in southern New England and has made public service his life’s work as a police officer, state legislator and now as Rhode Island Attorney General. Peter journeyed to Israel recently with eight other state attorneys general to avail themselves of the opportunity to get to know Israel and its people, as they had aspirations of a continuing career in public service at the state and/or federal levels. In sharing his reminiscences of the trip with our members, he marveled at the safety of the city streets of Jerusalem, Tel Aviv and Haifa. Arriving in Israel on a Friday, Peter began his immersion into Israeli life at sundown by attending a Shabbat service followed by a sumptuous meal hosted by relatives of former New York Attorney General Robert Abrams. That Shabbat dinner in Jerusalem set the tone for the remainder of his visit to Israel. It made his stay both inspirational and spiritual on many levels, he said. Of all the Israeli officials he met, Shimon Peres was the most aweinspiring, giving a trenchant rebuttal to President Barak Obama’s request that Israel return to its pre-June, 1967 borders. A question and answer period concluded the evening and that, in turn, was punctuated by a sincere request that our guest return in the not too distant future. Grant Recipients - Continued from page 1

Among her many unique endeavors were several service projects in Thailand. She was part of a group that helped establish a seed bank. This enabled local villagers to farm sustainably without reliance upon chemical fertilizers, which can be prohibitively expensive and harmful to the environment. Her group also took a stand in defense of the environment by aiding another village in its fight to prevent the establishment of a nearby copper mine. Ilana Yanku entered George Washington University this year. She will major in Mathematics. Ilana is the daughter of Brother Steven Yanku. During her high school years, Ilana devoted herself as a volunteer at the Community Food Bank. She was also captain of her high school mathematics team, a leader of her school’s Peers as Leaders program and a member of its Emerald Encore Color Guard. Regular Touro members, their spouses and children, and children of deceased Touro members enrolled full time in an accredited institution of higher learning are eligible for the grants. Regular members, their children and children of deceased members similarly enrolled may apply for the interest-free loans. Since the Leo Greenberg Memorial Student Loan Program was introduced in 1981, children of Touro members have received interest-free loans totaling nearly $300,000. None have been defaulted! ~5~

Guest Speaker A.T. Wall with Brother Jeffrey Padwa

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e usually hear about prisons and their inmates from the local media. On September 21st, Touro had a special opportunity to learn about Rhode Island’s corrections system from its director, A.T. Wall. Candid and surprisingly open, Director Wall entertained a large audience at the end-of-summer monthly lodge meeting. After the business meeting and a hamburger & hotdog dinner (cooked by Brothers Liss and Waldman), Harmony Lodge Vice President Jeff Padwa introduced A.T. Wall, who has served in his current position for the past 12 years. He began by explaining that the “A” in A.T. stands for Ashbull, a biblical name which has been passed down through many generations in his family. The Corrections Department has the largest budget and workforce in our state government. He mentioned there are about 15,000 admissions annually, average inmate age is around 33 and the average annual cost per inmate is $44,000. Twenty-six RI inmates are serving a life sentence without parole. The Department is also responsible for post-release supervision. On any given day, one of every 21 men on the streets of RI is under Correction’s supervision (i.e. on parole). Wall related a personal story about how the system’s preparation of its inmates for life after prison brought home the bigger picture to him. The story’s lesson: we must spend more money to prepare these people or else we all will pay a price further on. He later stated the percentage of repeat offenders is 46% within 12 months of release. The director then turned to the audience for a Q&A session. Questions included: Why not a death penalty in Rhode Island; the percentage of drug-related crimes; how many people go to prison for marijuana possession; how much is spent per year on rehabilitation; the gang problem; privatization of the prison system; Craig Price’s attempt to return to the RI prison system from Florida; and a question about plea bargains. His last answer was to a question about the three most common crimes committed in our state, by gender. For men, it’s robbery, breaking & entering, and drug possession. And for women, it’s theft, prostitution and forgery. Class dismissed.


Announcing Membership’s Huge Contest!

Community Involvement

By Andy Lamchick, Chairman, Membership Committee

By Steve White, Chairman

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New Year of Touro Fraternal giving is well under way. We have given money to very worthwhile organizations this year including: The Jewish Alliance, Jewish Family Service and the sponsorship of Shabbat meals at the URI Hillel House. We have also given to a few new causes this year. They are The Meeting Street School and the Gotta Have Sole Foundation, started by Nicholas Lowinger, a young man doing a Bar Mitzvah project and whose father, Danny Lowinger, is a member of Touro. His foundation gives gently used shoes to kids in shelters, a very noble cause. Another new organization we helped fund was the Jewish Eldercare of Rhode Island. It will be using the money to buy an IPad 2. This technology will be used to help seniors in one nursing home communicate with those in different homes. Very high tech. Touro’s Community Involvement Committee is now embarking on another great cause. On a quarterly basis, we will donate food for meals at the Ronald McDonald House and additionally, a team of Touro Brothers will cook the meal. This endeavor will feed the families of patients who are undergoing treatment for cancer. Our latest donation was to the Rhode Island Jewish Committee on Scouting, where we donated the funds for internet access for the scouts at Camp Yawgoo. We will be meeting soon to further identify causes which need our support. I welcome any and all ideas. Please feel free to contact me either by phone (401) 487-2135 or email - white1110928@ yahoo.com.

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ast year, members of Touro brought in a record number of new Touro Brothers. We love your enthusiasm, so we’re going to keep our growth rolling right into 2012. Announcing our Touro New Member contest for 2012! Starting October 21 and rolling right through the end of March, we will reward the Touro member who brings in the most new Regular members with a fantastic prize. You will win a fully paid table of 8 at the Venus De Milo Annual Dinner Dance in June. Bring your Touro friends, bring your family, bring the members you brought in, it’s up to you. Not only that, you and your guests will arrive in a luxurious limousine also provided by Touro. There are a few rules you need to know. There is a minimum of three Regular members to be eligible for the contest. Your new members must be initiated by the April meeting. There will also be prizes for second and third place, but remember… your new brothers must be initiated by April 1st. So get those applications out to your eligible family and friends. You could be riding with all your B.T.F.F.’s (Best Touro Friends Forever) to the Venus on us. Good luck!!!!

2011 Golf League Winners By Barry Shaw, Chairman, Golf League

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he golf league had a great season with hotly contested races in both divisions. In the final weeks, Steven Hopfenberg, Division A, and Jerry Tebrow, Division B, pulled away and cruised into the winners circle. On the final day of golf, we had a scramble tournament, with the team of Steven Shaw, Jerry Tebrow, Bob Silverman and Andy Lamchick pulling out a dramatic victory after matching cards with the second place team. At a banquet following the tournament, the entire league feasted on a Chinese buffet before prizes were awarded. Abe Strashnick was thanked for his service during the year as handicapper and complaint department. The league voted to have its annual golf tournament on a Sunday afternoon in July, to include lunch and dinner. I look forward to next year and inviting anyone interested in Tuesday night golf to get in touch with me. ~6~

Jerry Tebrow (l), Division B winner; Steven Hopfenberg (r), Division A winner; and Barry Shaw (c)


"The play's the thing..." at the Newport Playhouse

Dancing with the "Touro" Stars at the Venus

~7~


Touro Fraternal Association

Non-Profit Org. U.S. Postage PAID Providence, RI Permit #719

P.O. BOX 3562 CRANSTON, RI 02910

Return Service Requested

UPCOMING TOURO EVENTS: DAVID DILORENZO NOVEMBER 16, 2011 FOXWOODS NOVEMBER 21, 2011

Visit Touro's Website at www.tourofraternal.org

Touro's Annual 2 0 1 1 NOVEMBER Bruce Weisman, Editor Columnists: Jed Brandes Howard Custis Norman Dinerman Andrew Lamchick Lester Nathan Arthur Poulten Barry Jay Schiff Howard Wasser Staff Photographers: Jeffrey Davis Edward Deluty Touro Fraternal Association 45 Rolfe Square, P.O. Box 3562, Cranston, RI 02910 Phone: 401-785-0066 Fax: 401-941-8781 E-Mail: info@tourofraternal.org

Hanukkah Party

5772

featuring

TOURO BOARD OF DIRECTORS 2011-2012 Robert Miller, Chairman Andrew Lamchick, Vice Chairman Steven Waldman, Treasurer Marc Gertsacov, Secretary Judah Rosen, Chaplain Barry Shaw, Inside Guard Arthur Poulten, Chairman Emeritus Jed Brandes Milton Bronstein Jeffrey Davis Edward Deluty Adam Halpern Stevan Labush Rodney Locke Alan Lury

Nathan Lury Barry Schiff Barry Shaw Michael Smith Howard Wasser Bruce Weisman Steven Waldman Steven White

FRIENDSHIP LODGE HARMONY LODGE Ried Redlich, President Norman Dinerman, President Lester Nathan, Vice President Jeffrey Padwa, Vice President Michael Levin, Secretary Andrew Liss, Secretary Richard Cohen, Treasurer Manocher Norparvar, Treasurer Barry Schiff, Inside Guard Edward Deluty, Faithful Guide

HARMONY • FRIENDSHIP • BENEVOLENCE ~8~

"Bubbleman" Keith Michael Johnson Gifts for children 12 and under Open to Touro members, their children and grandchildren

• Sunday • 1:00-3:00 PM •

December 18 2011

Watch for your flier in the mail. Or visit www.tourofraternal.org


Fall 2011