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The Sentinella Axarquia Edition Celebrating 10 Years No 125

January 15

ARkwRighTS The British Store & more

952 519 780

Torrox Costa since 2008

Osteopathy, Pain Therapy Massage, Bowen Technique & more Tel: 952 967 628 or 659 374 673 See main advert on page 36 Torrox Costa Advert on page 37

Tel: 952 530 908

e ag ep Se 45

Dr. Mannish -English Dentist B.D.S. (univ. LON)

FREE C/U & 2nd Opinion

The ‘FREE’ little mag that fits in your bag

Tur ni ng Dr eams i nt o Real i t y For Sale

Ref: S3-367


For Sale

Ref: S4-174

Torre del Mar

Fantastic 3 Bed 1.5 Bath End Townhouse (96m² built), reformed to a very high standard, spacious/dining room f/f kitchen, 3 double beds, a family bathroom, & a guest cloakroom with WC and basin. Living area & master bed have A/C. On the lower floor there is a large storage room of 24m² which is accessible from the street level

Stunning 4 Bed 3 Bath Villa (180m² built, 180m² plot), spacious accommodation incl. basement for conversion. Ground floor: spacious lounge/dining room with access to terrace & garden. Lovely modern f/f kitchen, bedroom & bathroom. Lower floor: 2 more beds, (one en-suite), family bathroom, access to the large garden with sea views and overlooking the local park



Sales Price: 139,950€

Ref: R1-110

For Rent

Sales Price: 179,000€

For Rent

Ref: R3-314


Torre del Mar

Charming 1 Bed Ground Floor Apartment (52m² built), fantastic sea views from its spacious terrace, entrance into large lounge/dining room, with incorporated American style fully-fitted kitchen, one double bedroom with ample wardrobe space and a family bathroom. Large terrace with lovely sea views

Spacious 3 Bed 2 Bath Apartment (94m² built), in most sought after area, close to all the local amenities yet in a quiet neighbourhood, lovely communal area with large pool, gardens and a children’s play park. The accommodation consists of a large open plan lounge/dining room with access to the terrace, f/f kitchen, laundry room, 3 double beds (master en-suite), family bathroom & private parking space

Ref: S5-054


Spacious 5 Bed 2 Bath Townhouse with separate apartment (197m² built, 200m² plot). Main house: living room, f/f kitchen, 3 beds and a bathroom. Downstairs apartment: living room, f/f kitchen, 2 beds and a bathroom. There are covered and sunny terraces, a built-in barbecue, storage and communal gardens and pool

Sales Price: 175,000€ (35,000€ REDUCTION!)

For Rent

Ref: R4-116


4 Bed 3 Bath Townhouse (175m² built)), close to the beach and all the required amenities. The accommodation comprises a large lounge/dining room, fully-fitted modern kitchen, 4 double bedrooms and 3 bathrooms. To the front of the property there is a gated patio area, and there is also a wonderful roof terrace

Rental Price: 750€ per month Rental Price: 450€ per month email: Calle Pintor Cipriano Maldonado 7A,  PROSPEROUS Edificio Salares, 29740, Torre del Mar NEW YEAR! Tel: 952 547 554 or 680 210 414

Rental Price: 300€ per month HAPPY  NEW YEAR!

For Sale

(You’ll find us located on the main road opposite the Torre del Mar bus station)

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email


CONTACT US: Editor: keidi Email:

m Fro Ed... the

Sales: kami - 664 210 468

Happy New Year from everyone at The Sen-

tinella! May 2015 be your best yet!

As the years go by, it’s true that time really does seem to fly at accelerated speeds…each year quickening, until it feels that no sooner has one year wound up, another one is fast upon us. I can still remember what I was doing on New Year’s Eve of 2013 as I awaited 2014 to arrive. And yet, just days ago I was celebrating the onset of another brand new year! It’s a strange time for many people, because we have the tendency to look back on the year gone by and analyse what we would have done differently, what were our biggest challenges, our best experiences, our most fun celebrations? At the start of each year I usually make a list of New Year’s Intentions. I don’t call them New Year’s Resolutions as the word ‘resolution’ is a definitive decision, and let’s face it, most of us don’t tend to stick to our resolutions, and that usually results in us feeling guilty come February! The word Intentions means that we’ll do our best and we intend to make certain changes in our life, but one can never predict life events accurately enough to make such definitive decisions. Although this year, I’ve done my New Year’s Resolutions / Intentions differently yet again. This year I have not made any. Why? Well, this year I prefer to give myself up to God and every day I will pray, “God, Your will is my will. Whatever it is You have planned for me, I am open and willing to take that path.” I figure that God knows more than any one of us about our Divine destiny, so for me, 2015 is all about living in the Light.

Distribution Tony - 664 689 138 Sentinella Axarquia Edition Follow us on Twitter @ The_Sentinella or @keidi_keating


Deposito Legal MA-1435-2005 No part of this publication, including pictures may be copied, used or reproduced without our prior written consent. The Sentinella accepts no responsibility for alterations to events listed, claims made by our advertisers or information provided by our contributors. So there!

The Sentinella is eternally dedicated to Colin Checkley, the founder and editor of The Sentinel Magazine. May he rest in peace. (Born; 1960 Died; 2004)

Have a good one, every one!

Keidi Keating

Editor (of the original little mag)

Menu del Dia - 6.95€ (Vegetarian 6.50€) Monday - Friday 12pm - 4pm 3 courses (including vegetarian)

Help yourself Buffet - Sundays Adults - 10.50€ Children under 10 - 5€ / 1pm - 4pm Includes various starters, mains, vegetarian dishes, rice and bread

Special Menu Monday to Friday - 10.50€

Poppadom, Onion Bhajee / Vegetable Pakora / Veg. Samosa, Prawn Puri & Chicken Tikka Chicken, Lamb, Prawn Vegetable - Vindaloo / Balti / Jalfrezi / Tikka Masala / Korma / Dansak / Biryani / Chicken or Lamb Tikka Pilau Rice / Naan / Tea or Coffee

Rashid, his family & staff would like to thank everyone for their custom over the past year and would like to wish you all A WONDERFUL NEW YEAR!! Avda Andalucia, Bloque Jupiter, Pasaje Timon 2, Calle Timon, Torre del Mar

Tel: 952 547 798 or 665 675 053

Open: 12.00 - 16.00 18.00 - 24.00 everyday TAJ Mahal Restaurant

Legal Services

English Legal Advisor & Experienced Lawyer Specialising In: v Property Legalisations v Catastro & Border Corrections v Addition of Pools or Extensions v Properties without Deeds v Wills & Inheritances A Quick, Professional & Impartial Service Call for a FREE consultation and get your Property papers checked out. We are now processing Non-Resident tax returns Solutions 4 U, CĂłmpeta Office Tel: 952 55 38 07 or 660 51 01 34 Email:

w i s h i n g E v e r y o n e A h a p p y N e w Ye a r !

Sunday Roast of wine â‚Ź 8.50 Bookings recommended All Day English Breakfasts, Full Menu Open from 10am 6 days a week (closed Mondays) Karaoke every Saturday night (in 8 different languages)

Quiz Night every Thursday from 8:30pm with cash prizes

C/Dr Maranon, Torre del Mar Tel: 952 544 362

TAJ MAHAL Traditional Indian Tandoori Restaurant Torrox Costa EAT AS MUCh AS YOU LikE


Main Dining Room


Children under 10 - 6.50€ King Prawns not included

Special Party Room

We offer an´all you can eat’ menu (as many starters, main courses & desserts as you want) all freshly cooked to order

Massood and his team would like to thank you for your custom over the last year and to wish you all a Happy New Year!! Menu del Dia Poppadum & Pickle tray Chicken, Lamb or Prawn Curry Rice or Naan Bread - Only 7€ (Vegetarian curry - 6.50€) Open every day - 12.00 - 16.00 / 18.00 - 24.00 Ctra Nacional - 340 (Next to Post Office) Torrox Costa

Tel: 95 253 4972 / 634 051 535


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De Cotta Law

Tax campaign for undeclared property The Spanish tax authorities have commenced a campaign to identify properties where the owners are not paying the correct local taxes. The properties they are looking for are those where a luxury 4 bedroomed Villa has been built on land only zoned for toolsheds – casa de apéros or where a water deposit has been converted to a swimming pool. Aerial photos are being taken to check against local rateable values and these can be used to check if a roof terrace has now become an attic room or an extension has been undertaken increasing the size of the constructed part of the property. The first stage of the investigation is already underway in Malaga, Vélez and Algarrobo and many other municipalities. The aim is to include the whole of the coast and inland areas such as Coín and Alhaurín el Grande. The law establishing the obligations to pay local rates – Ley de Catastro Inmobilaria – is in place to ensure that owners pay rates in accordance with the size and relative rateable values in the area they live in. The failure to do is of course depriving Town Halls of income and affecting those who are paying the correct rates. The process to update the Town hall records is straightforward presenting documents to show that the property has a deed escritura showing the actual size of the property and in some cases a topographical plan needs to be attached. The Town Hall charge for this is 60€ providing you have presented the correct documents. However if your property has been constructed for some time but the actual size of the property has been changed or the use has been changed you may need to complete a new build obra nueva declaration and obtain

an architect’s certificate and a licence to allow the Town hall to change their records. It is increasingly important to check your property situation. While the Town hall has power to charge you for the last 4 years of any unpaid rates it has not been common to charge any additional fines or sanctions. However the law does allow for fines running in to thousands so it is much wiser to check your property situation. Equally if you consider selling it will be necessary to provide correct documentation to the prospective buyers or a sale can be delayed or fall through if the documentation is not in place. For further information please contact our Nerja office on

The Hair & Beauty Studio Unisex Hairdressers, Beauty Therapies and Advanced Cosmetic Procedures Contact us for information or a free consultation about any of our treatments Stockists of products.

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Hair Treatments

Qualified Sports & Remedial Therapist

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January Offer

Our team is (BSC Hons; RSA) experienced and Specialising in soft tissue qualified to the highest standards on massage and manipulation inc. treatments for sciatica, back all Hairdressing colouring and cutting problems, tension headaches, muscle injuries as well as techniques! relaxing & lymphatic massage. See our facebook Treatments also using the G5 pages GBM Massage Machine for examples. Dermal Fillers JuvédermTM Ultra & Botox

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Semi Permanent Make -Up (Cosmetic Tattooing)

Wake up with your Make up! Really? YES! You can look 10 YEARS younger with carefully defined eyebrows, lips and eyeliner with Semi Permanent Makeup. Call for a free consultation with our experienced Therapist. Over 14 years experience in the beauty and 7 in the tattooing industry

Book a semi permanent makeup treatment (eyebrows, lips or eyeliner) and receive a complimentary iluvlashes lash lift perm and tint normally 45€! Ask about our Fabulous Massage And Facial Treatments especially designed for 2 people together

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Cruce de Periana, Puente don Manuel, (along from Morenos)

Call: 951 204 158 or 693 740 575


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Strange News go To Jail A woman was arrested after allegedly attacking her boyfriend in a heated argument over a game of Monopoly. Police were called to a home in Hooksett, New Hampshire, after a report of domestic disturbance relating to the classic board game. According to officers, Alyssa Ferraro, 21, told them "she got into an argument with her boyfriend over a game of Monopoly and open hand slapped him in the face". The alleged victim did not require medical attention and was not seriously hurt, reports CBS Boston. Ferraro was released on $2,000 bail after failing to produce a "Get Out of Jail Free" card and was ordered to appear in court. Space Cake Eight people were taken to hospital after eating a birthday cake which had been made with cannabis butter. Two brothers were celebrating their birthday in Oviedo, Northern Spain, when several guests started to feel unwell after tucking into the home-made chocolate cake. According to Spanish daily 20 Minutos, it had been baked by the mother of one of the guests with a surprise ingredient: butter mixed with marijuana. The stoned party-goers were reportedly unaware they were eating a 'space cake' and eight of them were taken to the emergency ward of a nearby hospital. Police were called but said the guest who had provided the cake was "in no fit state to be interrogated", reports the Metro. His mother was then contacted and made a statement, where she admitted to baking bad in the kitchen. Health officials noted all the guests were aged over 18 and none of them suffered any permanent damage. Oops! Boris Johnson's sister has apologised after a tweet from her account called David Cameron an 'egg faced c***'. Rachel Johnson claimed hackers were responsible for the message about the Prime Minister and swiftly deleted the tweet. The former editor of British high society magazine The Lady, said: "Yup. Hacked. Apologies everyone and especially to our Leader. Am trying to sort. "I've deleted the egg-faced See You Next Tuesday tweet and I do hope children that will be the end of the matter."

Countries of the World.........................Page 20 Faceless..............................................Page 72 Paparazzi............................................Page 74 New Year Traditions............................Page 77 Fruit & Veg Facts................................Page 78 Information.........................................Page 100 Jokes.................................................Page 102 Puzzle Pages....................................Page 104 Competition.......................................Page 108

HEATED          TAJ MAHAL - VENTA BAJA Ali, his family & staff would like to thank you for your custom over the last year and wish you all a Happy New Year!!

During the Christmas period we will be serving our normal menu. however Bookings are essential on New Year’s Eve




Monday - Thursday Day & Night (except Monday lunch) Poppadam & Pickles Selection of starters: vegetable samosa or pakora or onion bhaji or Prawn puri or Chicken tikka Main course: chicken, lamb, prawn or vegatable: Korma, Madras, Vindaloo, Balti, Jalfrezy, Rogan Josh, Tikka Masala, Karahi, Biriyani or Chicken or Lamb Tikka Accompaniments: Plain or Pilau rice. Plain, Garlic, Cheese or Onion Nan Bread or Chapati Takeaways available FREE Pappadam with Menu del Dia Mon-Fri 12pm - 4pm Free Pappadam & pickle Mango Chutney & Pickle 3 courses €5.95 with veg. curry with takeaways Tray with all meals €6.95 with meat/prawn curry

Opening hours 12pm - 4pm and 6pm - 12am every day (closed Monday lunch) Puente don Manuel (Chiringuito Antonio) Tel: 952 510 886 Mob: 667 934 731


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New Year Facts New Year’s Eve is one of the favourite celebration days for many people. Parties aside, the impending New Year typically brings hope for a more prosperous and happy 365 days. There are also some fun facts and trivia associated with the celebration The first New Year was celebrated 4,000 years by the ancient Babylonians. It’s tradition to bring in New Year’s with family and friends because the first people you see will either give you good luck or bad luck. So make sure to keep friends close and foes very far away More vehicles are stolen on New Year’s Day than any other holiday, statistics from the National Insurance Crime Bureau revealed. The top three places to celebrate New Year’s Eve are Las Vegas, Disney World and of course, New York City. Internationally, one of the biggest celebrations is in Sydney, Australia. More than 80,000 fireworks are set off from Sydney Harbour Bridge.


DONER  kEBAB PiZZAS Tapas Menu available 12pm - 5.30pm Vegetable or Chicken Pakora - 50c Onion Bhaji - 50c Chicken Tikka - 1€ Chicken Tikka Massala & Rice - 1€ Chicken Curry & Rice - 1€ (changes daily) wine, Beer or Soft Drink - 1€ --------------------------Special Menu 12pm - 4pm / 6pm - 1am Poppadum & mint sauce Any Starter Any Main course (chicken, lamb, prawn or veg) Plain rice or Plain/garlic Naan bread

All this for just 10€ ---------------------------

Open: Mon - Sun 12pm - 1am Free home delivery in the Torrox area (Outside Torrox min.10€ spend) 7pm - 11pm indian kitchen: 12pm - 4pm & 6pm - 1am C/ La Fuente, 6 - Torrox Pueblo Tel: 952 538 614 - 647 220 813 - 632 854 169

In Italy, people wear red underwear on New Year’s Day to bring good luck all year long. In Colombia, Cuba and Puerto Rico, some families stuff a large doll, which is called Mr. Old Year, with memories from the past year. They also dress him in clothes from the outgoing year. At midnight, he is set ablaze, thus burning away the bad memories. It’s good luck to eat foods like black eyed peas, ham and cabbage because it is thought they bring prosperity. But if you want to have a happy new year, don’t eat lobster or chicken. Lobsters can move backward and chickens can scratch in reverse, so it is thought these foods could bring a reversal of fortune. Chinese New Year is celebrated the second full moon after the winter solstice. Jewish New Year is called Rosh Hashanah. Apples and honey are traditionally eaten. In ancient Rome the new year began on March 1st

SAXON S.L JcB Digger Hire velez-Malaga Area services



662 39 83 72 678 23 22 53


“Happy New Year” NEW Trade Counter 664 763 344

Air con recharge 40€ (inc. IVA) 20% off clutches 15% off Cambelts

(free fitting inc. valve and balance)


(same day fitting service available)


Up to

50% off All Brakes fitted (off PVP)

Full Service



+ Parts

Starter motors & alternators repaired

(cheaper than recon/new)

Call John:

Car Cleaning & Valet Service from 40€ OPEN MONDAY - FRiDAY 9AM - 6PM

952 507 144 / 664 763 344 C/ Julio Romero de Torre, 1 Poligno industrial Panoleta Velez Malaga

Industrial Estate

TuVESA Proneumaticos All major debit and credit cards accepted


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Collective Names Of Animals Test yourself and your friends, how many did you know? More next month A herd of antelope A colony or an army of ants A shrewdness of apes A herd or pace of asses A culture of bacteria A cete of badgers A shoal of bass A sleuth or sloth of bears A colony of beavers A swarm, grist or hive of bees A flock, flight, congregation or volery of birds A sedge or siege of bitterns A sounder of boars A herd of buffalo A brace or clash of bucks An army of caterpillars A clowder or clutter of cats A herd or drove of cattle A brood or peep of chickens A clutch or chattering of chicks A bed of clams

A quiver of cobras A rag of colts A cover of coots A kine of cows (twelve cows are a flink) A band of coyote A sedge or siege of cranes A float of crocodiles A murder of crows A litter of cubs A herd of curlews A cowardice of curs A herd of deer A pack of dogs A dule of doves A brace, paddling or team of ducks A clutch of eggs A herd of elephants A pod of elephant seals A weaner pod is yearling elephant seals A gang of elks A mob of emus A business or fesnyng of ferrets A charm of finches

Fresh Daily Fruit, Salad & Vegetables & so much more! FRESHNESS GUARANTEED! All the usual favourites inc. Parsnips, Swede, Sprouts, Fennel, Fresh Herbs and all seasonal Fruit & Veg Great range of Homemade Pies, inc. Steak & Kidney, Steak & Guinness and Chicken & Mushroom. HOT Sausage Rolls and Cornish style Pasties cooked on the premises NOW - Handmade Sausages from ‘Ye Olde Butcher’. Lots of varieties inc. Pork & Leek, Tomato & Oregano, Lincolnshire, Cumberland, Chilli & Garlic and more Come and try our renowned Honey Roast Ham and NOW Roast Beef - Delicious!! *Extra Mature Somerset Cheddar Cheese *Wide range of Homemade Pickles *Fresh Farm Eggs *Variety of Personalised Greeting Cards *Large Variety of Freshly Prepared Ready Meals Wholesale supply to bars & shops also available OPENING HOURS - Open Mon - Fri 10am - 4pm Saturdays 10am - 3pm

Call: 634 427 152

Camino Venta Baja, Puente don Manuel


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es l d i r t n Wor u o C he au s s T -B i Of a e in er mb Nu


d un r ro u in o

rld wo e h t


s st i Z li


Population - 1.6 million Language - Portugese Located - West Africa Capital - Bissau Currency - CFA Religion - Islam Main Exports - Cashew nuts Literacy Rate - 57% Life Expectancy - 49 years g.D.P. Per Capita - uS $600 Total Area - 36,125 sq km National Sport - Football


interesting Facts - Formerly Portuguese Guinea, Guinea-Bissau won independence from Portugal in 1974 after a long struggle spearheaded by the left-wing African Party for the Independence of Guinea and Cape Verde (PAIGC). Once hailed as a potential model for African development, Guinea-Bissau is now one of the poorest countries in the world. Guinea-Bissau has suffered a civil war and several coups, the latest in April 2012. A new president was elected in May 2014 Political instability and mismanagement have undermined the economy. The country is dependent on primary crops - mainly cashew nuts - and subsistence agriculture. The government often struggles to pay wages. Guinea-Bissau is also a major hub for cocaine smuggled from Latin America to Europe. Several senior military figures are alleged to be involved in the trafficking of narcotics, prompting fears that the drugs trade could further destabilise an already volatile country.


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Solar Shade What! Christmas over already? 2015 has arrived! Well the end of a year and another one starts… and life goes on!

will not make the rooms dark, but will filter the glare to allow you to use all your gadgets or simply read the paper without straining your eyes. With the film applied, you don't have to pull down blinds to control the glare.

The reason we live here in Andalucia is for the sunshine – no matter what the season, but at this time of year we often find we have to squint all the time because of the low level sunshine!

Solar Control films help to even out the temperature in the rooms too, preventing hot spots and thus providing a comfortable living environment.

That’s fine occasionally, but when you’re trying to go about your daily business in your home or just want to relax behind the glass to enjoy the sun, who wants to be wearing sunglasses indoors – especially if you are trying to watch TV or use the tablet!

On the other hand if the idea of a permanent installation to the glass is not to your liking, what about Solar Blinds? With our solar blind system you can lower the blind to the height you prefer when it’s specifically needed to cut out glare and yet still have vision through the blind itself. The blinds can then be fully lowered in the evening to prevent the escape of warmth generated during the day by the winter sun, so adding to the comfort of the room after sunset.

Well that's where Solar Shade can help. We've been established for six years here, supplying Solar Control Window Films and Solar Blinds throughout the region to help homeowners control high levels of glare. Solar Control Window Films will reduce glare without reducing vast amounts of light. They

Go on, why not make living in the sun truly comfortable? See our ad on page 63 


Constant climates using the latest inverter technology Covering all the Axarquia region

Rumours Hair Salon

Where Style Is Created

Our Team of Professional Hairdressers Offer a wealth of experience  in Cutting, Styling, Colouring, Perming, straightening, and Gent’s hair. PAUL MITCHELL. Products NOW IN STOCK Nails & Chiropody Sophie Our Beauty Therapist Specialising in Manicure : Pedicure & Gelish a 3 week polish. Available in a choice of colours, French Polish Free nail art! Susan Blackwell Our UK trained chiropodist Available every Thursday & Friday (private room)

Sports & Relaxation Massage Our Masseurs specialise in the treatment of Sciatica : Upper & Lower Back Pain : Strained Muscles : Shoulder pain : Relaxation & Reflexology Hot Stones Massage Available (with Sophie)

50% discount on Keratin straightening treatment LA-BRASILANA Normal price €100 Now €50 including cut and blow dry when booking with Jade.

New to Rumours Gel Nail Extensions & Gel Overlays

15% discount on Paul Mitchell products.

Normal price €35 Now €28

C/ Villalatas, No.4, Puente Don Manuel (on the road to Vinuela) Open Tues - Fri 10am - 6pm Sat - 10am - 2pm Closed Mondays

Tel: 951 232 881 Mobile 625 223 829



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Modern Day Business What the new Job-Lingo Means "JOiN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY" We have no time to train you. "CASUAL wORk ATMOSPhERE" We don't pay enough to expect that you'll dress up; well, a couple of the real daring guys wear earrings. "MUST BE DEADLiNE ORiENTED" You'll be six months behind schedule on your first day. "SOME OVERTiME REQUiRED" Some time each night and some time each weekend. "DUTiES wiLL VARY" Anyone in the office can boss you around. "MUST hAVE AN EYE FOR DETAiL" We have no quality control. "CAREER-MiNDED" Female applicants must be childless (and remain that way). "NO PhONE CALLS PLEASE"

We've filled the job; our call for resumes is just a legal formality. "SEEkiNg CANDiDATES wiTh A wiDE VARiETY OF EXPERiENCE" You'll need it to replace three people who just left. "PROBLEM-SOLViNg SkiLLS A MUST" You're walking into a company in perpetual chaos. "REQUiRES TEAM LEADERShiP SkiLLS" You'll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect.

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Modern Days YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2015 when...

7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen

1. You accidentally enter your PIN on the microwave.

8. Leaving the house without your mobile phone, which you didn't even have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.

2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years. 3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three. 4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you. 5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses. 6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your mobile phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.

10. You get up in the morning and go on-line before getting your coffee. 11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : ) 12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing. 13. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list. 15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list.

Specialist Centre for Progessive lenses Custom glasses according to visual strategy The latest technology and the best prices on the market


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Linea Directa RAIN, WIND, HAIL, SNOW & FIRE. WHAT TO DO IF YOUR HOME IS DAMAGED BY ATMOSPHERIC PHENOMENON. general weather conditions in Spain As the climate has warmed globally, some types of extreme weather have become more frequent and severe in recent decades. Extreme heat, intense precipitation, and drought, are on the increase. Heat waves are becoming longer and hotter. Heavier rainfalls and flooding are more frequent. In a wide swing between extremes, drought is also more intense and more widespread. Small changes in the averages of many key climate variables can correspond to large changes in the weather. These changes are extremely difficult to predict and this weather variability can be extremely costly. Other atmospheric phenomena, such as hail, snow and fire, previously uncommon in regional climates such as the Mediterranean, are now becoming more common occurrences. That’s why its important to take out a quality home insurance policy. with Linea Directa you are covered for damage by atmospheric phenomena As global climate conditions vary, Linea Directa adapts their home insurance policies to ensure that customers are covered for damage resulting from some types of extreme weather. Linea Directa includes cover for these unpredictable events in their insurance policies. Peace-of-mind with Linea Directa We understand that your peace-of-mind is important, especially in your home. As adverse weather conditions become more common, Linea Directa will ensure you are fully covered from their diverse effects to your property and their contents. When you take out a home insurance policy from Linea Directa you can breath more easily. We can’t predict when ex-

treme atmospheric conditions occur, but we be there to ensure that if any damage should result, you won’t have to worry. Our aim is to provide you with added peace-of-mind. We hope the information provided in this article is of interest. If you would like to contact Linea Directa please call 902 123 161 More information on Linea Directa online at

NOw OPEN “Welcome to Masala House, a modern Indian Restaurant with all the classic dishes and some Masala House Specialities” Lunchtime menu available, choose your curry dish and rice or bread for 6€ Ctra El Peñoncillo 11, Torrox Costa


To motorway

Torrox Costa To Nerja El Faro


Open 13:00 - 16:30 and 18:30-23:30 10% discount on Takeaway Easy Parking in front Tel: 952 530 921 Mob: 652 477 793 Masala house

Services Offered: wTooway satellite internet from â‚Ź29.90 wIntelsat907 for basic uK Channels / Radio wIPTV Full Sky packages & basic Scandinavian / Russian / uSA available wTV & PC Repairs wMobile phone Repairs & unlocking

happy New Year

TORROX Wishing everyone a Happy & Peaceful New Year

H a p p y N e w Ye a r

Probably the BEST homemade Pizzas in Torrox Costa

Indoor BBQ Every Saturday, Sunday & Monday at midday Entrecote, Pork fillet, Chicken

Wishing all customers, old, present & new, a very Happy New Year!

Paseo Maritimo, Ferrara Playa,Torrox Costa


Boca Boca

Cafeteria, Bakery & Cake Shop Famous Breakfast menus Homemade Granny style Cakes using only Natural Products Speciality - Gooseberry Cake (must try!!) Opening daily from 8am - 6pm (closed Wednesdays) Wedding, Birthday service available Lovely Valentine’s Breakfast available Avda. America, Blq 89, Local 24, TORROX COSTA Tel: 608 484 588



MULTIPARQUET & SERVICES since 2002 reforming and decorating for you!

Parquet flooring, underfloor heating, decorating, reforms, IKEA Service: we supply, deliver and assemble

Avda. Europa, Blq 83, Torrox Costa Call: Matthias 652 357 584 Website: www.multiparquet .es For more information and no obligatory quote!

e a r F r o m To r r o x



Beauty Therapy Complementary Therapy

If you are thinking of reforming think of Multiparquet & Sevices based in Torrox Costa since 2002 reforming and decorating for you! Specialising in Parquet flooring, underfloor heating, decorating, reforms and they provide an IKEA service, they supply, deliver and assemble. Matthias 652 357 584.


Schlosser Reisen, your Travel Agency in Torrox Costa with more than 30 years experience. We offer flights, hotels, packages, transfers or our scheduled daily excursions with pick up from Torre del Mar to Almuñecar. Granada, Seville, Cordoba, Ronda or Gibraltar are our destinations. Also we can help you find an apartment for long or short stay. unisex Professional hairdresser with more than 9 years experience in two of the most top named hair salons in Nerja Erica has now opened her own salon in Torrox Costa!!! Erica Villegas. Erica will give you a very warm welcome and is fluent in English and is Spanish speaking. Facebook: Erica Villegas Estilistas Torrox Costa E-mail: C/Centro Internacional - Bq77-nr. 2. Call: 610 876 127 Rebeccah Curtis wellbeing Centre The centre is open Tues-Sat 10am until 3pm. urb. Laguna Beach, Centro Commercial B, No. 16 Torrox Costa, Tel: 952 53 01 22 &  651 956 284 Tejidos Belen specialists in cushions, pillows, accessories, interior and exterior decoration. We repair your sofas and terrace furniture to measure. Call 952 531 732 or 617 553 880 Pol. Cortijo Amaya Nave 13 Torrox Costa.

Deutsche Bäckerei

The german Bakery have been 10 years in Torrox. They offer a wide range of products eg: German bread, rolls, pasteries, cakes, sandwiches, sweet snacks & Opening Hours: fresh coffee. The bakery offers daily fresh bread & bakMonday - Saturday 7.30am - 2pm ery products. Orders can be placed by phone, email or sms. Be prepared for Birthdays and special occasion Sunday 7.30am - 11am cakes. Special orders can be made as late as two days Our products are made from the finest of ingrediPies and cakes for every notice. ents which allows you to enjoy a healthy balanced diet. occasion. Typical German We only use natural products without flavouring or additivies. We have something for everyone, & special rates pastry f.e. Pretzel, for events and functions

german Bakery

Crumble Cake, Rye bread and a lot more!!!

Every week New Offers!


Tel: 636 153 459

Avda. America, Blq 85, Local 2, TORROX COSTA DIE Deutsche Bäckerei Torrox

Avda. Andalucia, 34 (next to Eroski) Pol. Cortijo Amaya Nave 13 TORROX COSTA Email:



Unisex Professional hairdresser Celebrating 1st year’s anniversary!!

Contact Lewis insurance Services for reputable buildings & contents insurance, car insurance, private med- THANK YOU for your support & loyalty ical insurance, pets insurance, funeral plans, cars bought & sold, call Mark on 653 322 392 Boca Boca Cafeteria, Bakery and Cake Shop Open daily 8am 6 p m (Closed Wed). Famous for their breakfasts and their spec i a l i t y Gooseberry Cake. A v d a . America, Blq 89, local 24. To r r o x Costa

Tues - Fri 10am -2pm / 3.30pm - 6.30pm Sat 10am - 2pm (Closed Mondays) Tel: 610 876 127 Erica Villegas Estilistas Torrox Costa C/Centro Internacional - Bq77- No. 2 Torrox Costa (behind furniture store) ALL HeALTH cAre PrODUcTs 50% off, during January

Have you been to Caribe on the Paseo Maritimo, a fantastic location with uninterrupted views of the Mediterranean. Enjoy delicious food with menu del Dia 7.50€ - 2 courses or 9.50€ - 3 courses which includes a drink per person (beer, wine or soft drink. They have a special offer of one of their full range of homemade cakes and a coffee - 3€ and fantastic homemade gateaus and a new 3 chocolate gateau to enjoy, great with a delicious coffee. Fresh fish cooked Andalucían style, pizzas and value meals such as Pinchitos de Cerdo de Pollo only 5.50€ and Alinbias en salsa de tomates only 3.50€. Paella is available from 1.30pm everyday (pre-orders only), includes a soft drink or small beer or glass of wine, bread and Alioli. Takeaway - available. Caribe can even cater for weddings and birthday parties with celebratory cakes made to order. Call in or telephone to find out more.


All you need for your home interior at Decoracion El Faro Curtains, blinds, roll-up, mattresses, sofas, sheer curtains. Big show room and best prices on the coastline, ask for information. All this available in "Decoracion El Faro" !! 952 530 375 Open from Mon to Fri 9.30am - 2pm and 4.30pm - 8pm, Saturday from 9.30 am - 2. Russells British Store always have a great stock of favourite British products. We also have our vegetarian selection back in stock as well as our normal frozen food section. Popular ciders such as Scrumpy Jack as well as Guinness, lager & Crabbies ginger beer. Cleaning products, toiletries, pet food, greeting cards & more. Every month we have special offers in store so please call in to see our offers. If we haven’t got something you are looking for please ask & we can try and get it. If you are looking to eat out and fancy a Pizza, well look no further than Pizzeria Restaurante Ferrara in Torrox Costa. ‘Probably the best homemade pizzas in Torrox Costa’. For Reservations call: 618 341 453 Calzados Pradas for real leather shoes made in Spain! Avd. El Faro No. 2. Call: 609 526 912 or email: calzadospradastorrox@gmail.com44


Bar y Restaurante

Laguna Beach - Torrox Costa

Breakfasts, Snacks & Full Menu - Specialising in Ribs, Wings, Steaks & Chicken Traditional Sunday Lunch Homemade Tapas available every day changing daily - 1€ Thomas & Kerstin would like to wish everyone a very Happy New Year!! Saturday 17th January - Charlie Miller Saturday 31st January - Johnny Hollywood From 9pm 25th January - Burn’s Night 3 course dinner Cock - a - Leekie soup Haggis, Tatties & Neeps Cranachan

Valentine’s Day

5 course Candlelit dinner Bookings only (please call for more information)

10am - 3pm / 6pm - Late / Thurs & Fri Special menus Sunday 1pm - 5pm (After 5pm - Bookings only) Closed Wednesday For more info call: Thomas or Kerstin

952 968 100 / 696 516 534

Free wifi and PC usage

A Sample from the menu Lamb chops with honey & mint ~~~ Chicken breast filled with cheese wrapped in bacon with sweet wine sauce ~~~ Pork sirloin with pineapple jam and tomato chutney ~~~ Beef fillet stroganoff with basmati rice ~~~ Steak on the stone - fillet, sirloin or rump ~~~ Beef, Prawn or vegetable wok with wild rice ~~~ Salmon with leek sauce & roast vegetables ~~~ Swordfish with sauteed vegetables & pots

Tel: 952 511 247

Bianca Bojahr

NO DAMP! - Stay Dry Healthy House 100% Damp proofing solutions with 1 treatment. Madereina S.L. will solve your problems once and for all with authorised personel Ecological and non-toxic products Life lasting Permanent solutions water repellent

For, Roofs, walls, Bathrooms, Pools, Terraces, Foundations & All concrete constructions 10 Year guarantee References

For a Free Quotation Call: 958 069 967 / 677 473 487 Call us also for building work and all kinds of reforms

Or email us on: More info on:

English Dentist:


Dr. Michael Mannish B.D.S. (univ. London) Harley St. Cosmetic Dentist of 25 yrs. Free 2nd opinion + c/u Sedation available Implant Specialist

Dr. Arielle Perkins Family Medicine

w w w w

General Medicine Paediatrics Acupuncture Aesthetic anti-ageing Medicine without surgery w Other Specialists w Physiotherapy

Dr. Carlos Castillo GP and Paediatrician

Lda. Mª. Patrocinio Haro López Psychology

We Speak English, German & French Centro Internacional, Blq. 86, TORROX COSTA

Tel: 952 53 09 08

Dr. Antonio Espitia Corredor Ear Nose and Throat Doctor

Please call for more information or send an e-mail:

“LA CASITA” The cosiest tapas bar in Torrox Costa Belgian Beers available

Wide variety of Cocktails Live Paella pre-order from 8 persons Open every day from 2pm (except Thurs) Free wifi Sunday Specials (different every week) Everybody welcome We speak 5 languages Avenida Europa Bloque 80 (back side calle los Pinos) Torrox Costa

CAFE SPORTS BAR LA BODEGA Free wifi and Sports on 3 screens Thursday Quiz starts 9pm Saturday Karaoke starts 9.30pm Tapas, Breakfasts, Burgers, Bar Snacks, Daily Specials

3 Course Sunday Lunch - 8€  Served 1pm - 4pm Open daily 10.30am - Late Located behind Tourist Information Office/Library

Tel: 951 433 467

Torrox Costa

: La Casita

Tel: 617 506 550 / 611 232 517

x A e th o t e uid G

ia u q ar

Known for THE BEST CLIMATE IN EUROPE, Axarquia has some of the best weather conditions in the world. It isn’t any wonder that millions of people visit this beautiful area every year! The Mediterranean sea to the south and sheltered magnificent mountain ranges to the north, Axarquia sits within the Malaga Province of Andalucia. The following pages feature some of the beautiful towns and villages of this superb and picturesque area.

inhabitants 700 Level above sea 331 metres Nearest airport Malaga Distance to airport 32 km Distance to beach 22 km Max. temperature 350 C Min. temperature 50 C Cutar is an inland paradise. Visit it and get to know and enjoy all it has to offer. It is perfect for those that like living in a natural peaceful place and only want to wander through the emblematic streets and hear the birds singing. Cutar village, which originated from an Arab farm and has numerous fountains and prosperous agriculture, lies under the protective shade of the Castillo en el Cerro. The very narrow streets of Arab origen are one of the most emblematic characteristics of this village in Axarquia, where you can feel and sense the past throughout the entire village. Cutar extends to the north of el Cerro among olive trees and vineyards. The town is typically Tourist Office Calle Fuente 13 CĂştar Malaga 29718 Tel: 952 554 247


Axarquian and is dominated by the church tower that stands above the houses in the highest part of town. From all around this town there are splendid views of the Penon de Comares and the corridor of Colmenar-Periana. SOME OF THE BEST FIESTAS THEY CELEBRATE At Easter they traditionally celebrate on Easter Sunday el Huerto in which they sell the fruits and the profits pay for the fair in honour of San Roque. The fair in honour of San Roque is one of the most important and popular events of this town. It takes place in the middle of August and lasts a week and during this time many people who live away return to enjoy the

numerous activities and join in the fun. El Monfi takes place on the second weekend of October when Cutar goes back to its Moorish origens where they celebrate traditions of Andalusian culture in the streets, like the Zoco which is a craft and gastronomy fair. The object of this is to get a deeper knowledge of a culture that lasted six centuries and which was the origen of nearly all the white villages in Axarquia.


Tourist Office Camino de Velez Benamargosa, Malaga 29718 Tel: 952 517 002

inhabitants 2,000 Level above sea 100 metres Nearest airport Malaga Distance to airport 37 km Distance to beach 14 km

Benamargosa is located in the river valley of the same name some 15 kilometres inland from Velez-Málaga on the costa del Sol and about a half an hour´s drive by motorway from Málaga. The valley is practically evergreen and almost like an oasis in summertime, due to the plantations of avocado and citrus fruits lining the river. The village centre is 90 metres above sea level and the hills rising up along the side of the river reach 550 metres. Thanks to the warm climate of the area, it is possible to achieve more than one harvest. Traditional vineyards are to be found in the hills surrounding the village, growing the famous Málaga grapes used to make the well known sweet wines of the region. The traditional cultivation of olives, almonds and carob is gradually being replaced by the mango. Official Fiestas - June 6th & First weekend in August Popular Fiestas - 20th January (Festival of San Sebastian) Mid April (Fiesta del Campo) Early August (Feria de Benamargosa)

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Sneeky Bevvy 14 Reasons To Allow Drinking On The Job

12. It makes the cafeteria food taste better.

1. It's an incentive to show up.

13. Bosses are more likely to hand out raises when they have had a couple of drinks.

2. It reduces stress. 3. It leads to more honest communications.

14. Salary negotiations are a lot more profitable.

4. It reduces complaints about low pay. 5. It cuts down on time off because you can work with a hangover. 6. Employees tell management what they think, not what management wants to hear. 7. It helps save on heating costs in the winter. 8. It encourages carpooling. 9. Increases job satisfaction because if you have a bad job you don't care. 10. It eliminates vacations because people would rather come to work. 11. It makes fellow employees look better.

Ref. SH851

Beautiful villa in Chilches near the beach with impressive sea views. Plot of 511m2 and house of 407m2, private garden of 200m2, swimming pool of 22m2. 4 bedrooms, 5 baths, big living room, glazed terrace, indoor patio, roof terrace of 100m2, in the cellar a nice big play room, private garage, modern furnished kitchen, automatic blind, air conditioning with heating, solar panels, water softener, turkish bath


Ref. SH844

Nice detached house in Almayate with beautiful sea views, plot of 250m2 and house of 120m2, 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, living room with chimney, furnished kitchen, several terraces, patio, air conditioning with heating, closed garage and store room


Ref. SH699

Ref. SH845

Beautiful villa in Algarrobo of 77m2 with impressive sea views, plot of 2,840m2. The house has 2 bedrooms and 1 bath, living room and kitchen, nice porch, several terraces and garden. South facing. Private swimming pool

Nice independent house in Almayate with awesome sea views. House of 100m2 and plot of 200m2. 3 bedrooms, 2 baths, living room with chimney, furnished kitchen, big terrace, a glazed terrace, store room and parking place



C / Infante 23, Edif. Faro 1, bajo, 29740 Torre del Mar, Málaga, España Tel./Fax. 0034 / 952 54 70 76 / 658 93 31 87 e-mail:

A.M. Santamaría Translations Professional and experienced English / Italian to Spanish translator offers her services for translating all kind of texts. “I specialise in legal, economic, literature, tourist and marketing translation, as well as Website, Software and Video Games Localisation.” “After having worked with me, clients say that I was the best translator for their needs.”

For more information, contact me on: 656 414 007 or e-mail me at:

Holiday let Changeovers Property Maintenance House Cleaning, Pool Maintenance Building Works/Reforms Complete Property Maintenance Airport Transfers Pools 65€/Month inc. Chemicals Villas 3 Bed/2 Bath 60€ Laundry 3 Bed/2 Bath 40€

Call: 628 882 027

English Dental Technician 30 years experience Fully Qualified Denture Repairs Adjustments / Duplications Based in Torrox Pueblo We can visit if needed Call Graham for confidential advice on any denture problem on: 952 539 219 / 633 157 891

DENTiST Dr Bakri

*Dental Cosmetics *Implants Crowns & Bridges Algarrobo Costa Tel: 952 55 05 21

Torrox Costa Tel: 952 53 20 12

Emergencies: 678 974 892

Fit ness DONOR

Latin & Social DANCE - BEGINNERS CARDIODANCING - dANCE AEROBICS Body Sculpt - TOTAL BODY ROUTINE SIT & FIT - chair based ROUTINE “MAD” - extreme routine COUCH TO 5K - BEGINNERS JOGGING SQUATAHOLIC - 2,000 squats minimum BODYBAG BOXING - punchbag workout Kilo Cou nting - Weight Ch eck & Exercise Counting Check Exerc ise

Call HuGh GRANT 606 086 300

Advertise here from only 25 euros per month Call: 664 210 468 Email:

MAN & VAN! Anytime...Anywhere

Locally based, 12 cubic metres

€25 per hour

Warehouse pick ups from Malaga to Nerja every Thursday 20€ per cubic metre

Call Mark: 669 255 968

“We would like to wish all our clients a Prosperous & Healthy New Year”


Van & trailers. Light haulage, removals up to 25m3, car & boat transport. Vinuela based, 25 years experience. Local or anywhere in Europe. Regular Spain-UK-Spain trips. Phone 636 844 209 E-mail:

F O R   A L L   Y O U R   B U i L D i N g   R E Q U i R E ME N T S Reforms, Terracing, Bathrooms, Kitchens, Electrical works, Plastering & Damp Proofing. Free no obligation quotes. Very competitive prices. Visit our website for more information and testimonials from previous customers.

Te l : 6 6 5 3 22 13 6 - 9 52 53 9 4 2 3 Tlfn: (+34) 669 899 065 Email:

NO HIDDEN COSTS and free delivery / collection to the airport along the coast to Nerja

Special offer January and February long term car rental from 300€ per month


Medical Thermography & LCHF Nutrition Specialising in women’s health infrared Breast Screening

Radiation and Pain Free Detecting early changes in the breasts

Janet Van Dam

American College of Clinical Thermography

Clinics @ El Morche & Nerja Appointments Tel: 618 989 125

S i r o c c o

The coolest bar!



Be safe, have your chimney inspected and cleaned before you use your fire this winter

Tel Keith: 607 441 959 or Russ: 654 184 242 RESTAURANTE ASiATiCO


Special Menu for Chinese New Year 18th February

Opening Hours 12pm - 4pm 6.30pm - 12am

Open every day from 5pm Edf. Trayamar (opposite Lidl) Algarrobo Costa

Avda. Andalucia, 35, Algarrobo Costa Tel: 952 551 439 Mob: 673 160 208

MENU DEL DiA 5.90€ 6.90€ EVENiNgS


Calle granada, 88 NERJA Tel: 952 52 4651



24 hOURS 606 939 929

VETS: Rafael Carrillo de Albornoz López José Ma Ramírez Cuevas C/ Rodriguez Acosta, No10 Tel: 95 252 15 07 Fax: 95 252 71 91 NERJA

656 825 319 24 hOUR EMERgENCiES

H a p p y N e w Ye a r ChATELiN ORTOPEDiA & ChiROPODiST/PEDiCURA wMaking & repairing Prothesis and Orthesis wCorsets & knee, ankle and wrist supports

wFor all inlays (inc. Sports) wWheelchairs, walking aids & beds wRehabilitaion articles, etc.

Opening hours: Monday - Thursday 10am - 2pm / 3pm - 6pm Calle la Cruz, 60 Nerja Tel: 695 481 082 or 658 773 857 Email:


Ye a r F r o m N e r j a


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Neee rpajgaes 46-50 S


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it he bout a l l a ad


Rafters Rastro – New 2 You Shop. We buy and sell your unwanted household items. We sell a huge variety of goods which are changing every day. Normally we have in stock; a wide range of furniture, lamps, vases, ornaments, general bric a brac, books and good quality second- hand clothes. Contact Alan or Wendy. La llave de oro, C/Granada 88, Nerja, 952 524 651. Locksmith 24 hrs emergency service, 606 939 929, opening and repairing safes, armoured doors, authorised technical service, key cutting, supplier for quality padlocks, safes and other security products. Clinica Veterinaria Almijara For all your pets veterinary needs, services including in clinic consultations, X rays, Blood tests, Analysis, Teeth cleaning, Surgery and home visits. 24 hour emergency service- 656 825 319. English, Spanish, German, French and Czech speaking. Dog & Cat Grooming. Stockiest for Specific, Royal Canin and other brand names for dog and cat food. Website: Open Monday-Friday 10.00-13.30, 17.30-20.30, Saturday 10.00-13.30.You can call the Clinic on 95 252 1507 for further information. Chatelin ortopedia & chiropodist/pedicura practice we are a company with over 30 years experience in the orthopedic sector. linda is a qualified chiropodist and henry is a certified prothesis and orthesis maker. for all your inlays and sport inlays, making and repairing prothesis and orthesis, corset-knee, ankle and wrist supports, wheelchairs, walking aids, beds, rehabilitation articles monday - thursday 10am 2pm and 3pm - 6pm. call: 695 481 082 or 658 773 857 Visit ink & Chips on C/Perez. They have all you need for your PC, such as ink cartridges & peripherals as well as laptop & printer sales. They also offer a technical service 365 days a year. Locked yourself out of your house or having lock problems? Call the 24 hour emergency locksmith, a fully qualified uK C&G tradesman. Or, simply call to book an appointment

DentadanĂŠs Dental Clinic offer top-quality Scandinavian dental care at competitive prices-a successful concept that has been used since the clinic was established in Maro (Nerja) in 1991. We have two Danish dentists (one female, one male) ready to solve all your dental problems. Please visit our website at for a full list of treatments & prices as well as directions to & pictures of the clinic. Open Mon -Friday 10am-5pm including all summer months. We speak English, Danish/Scandinavian, German, Spanish, French & Italian. Tel: 952 52 96 66. Olas Bar Sports Calender for Jan 2015 Football The first weekend starting Friday 2nd Jan stretched out to Tuesday 6th is the 3rd round of the FA Cup with some great potential giant kills. The 4th round follows over the weekend of the 24th/25th. No champ league or Europa cup Africa cup of nations 17th - 28th Cricket International triangular series, Australia v England 16th, England v India 20th Australia v England 23rd, England v India 30 th Tennis Australian open 19th- 1st of Feb Darts World championship 3rd-11th Snooker The masters 11th - 18 th "Frietkot" have changed their name to "Belga" to express more of the quality of our Belgian home cooked cuisine. We serve the best Belgian French fries combined with quality products such as Sweetbread with Dijonaise sauce or the best sirloin steak with a variety of different sauces, all freshly home made. Belgian Beers available. Calle Gloria 9, Nerja 666 625 694 Monday Closed Open from 12 till midnight. For all your healthy foods and natural remedies. The health Shop Rincon Natural C/Carretera1, Local 2, Edificio Armijo III Nerja, next to Supersol, beside Barclays Bank. Stocking gluten free products, Organic food, Natural remedies and Natural skincare products. They also do Crystal Healings and Cranio Sacral Therapy. Tel: 952 52 35 03 Starcar in Nerja for all your car repair needs: bodywork painting, service, pre I.T.V. check, air-conditioning, tyres, brakes, clutch etc. Also car transfers. Find them at Avda Alcalde Antonio Villasclaras just up from the BP garage as you are leaving Nerja on the right hand side and they are below the gym. Call Jonathan who speaks English on 637 801 325 Express hand Carwash Sebabrilan Let them wash your car from only 8.50 euros. Express car valet, interior and exterior. C/ Almirante Carranza 49, Nerja. Call: 666 184 966

“The hire company for the little ones”

We welcome you to inspect, select & collect from our SHOWROOM at LAKE VIÑUELA In order to give clients individual attention please phone for an appointment before visiting. We are situated at KM29 (on right) off A356 1km past Camping & Pantano Restaurant. We are signposted from there. From bouncy chairs to buggies, stairgates to sterilisers. Everything you need for when little ones come to visit. PHONE DAWN ON: 627 931 360 WEBSITE: EMAIL:


Have you lost BBC1, 2, 3, 4, ITV1, CH4, BBC News, & BBC Radio ? ThEN hAVE iT BACk ThROUgh iNTELSAT SATELLiTE -----------To move your own dish and supply a new Digibox - ONE OFF PRICE €280 (No monthly fee) “wORRiED ABOUT LOSiNg BBC & iTV?” IPTV is the answer. No dish required just an Internet connection (1.5MB minimum) 19 Top uK channels - 7 day Catch up TV This is the NEXT GENERATION of TV All this for just 17.99€ per month + installation Please call for more details

1.3mtr DiSh FiT ONLY 280€ Realignments & Relocations from 40€ New Sky+ HD Boxes 260€ Humax Freesat Recordable HD Boxes If we lose all the BBC & ITV channels these are the Digi Boxes for ON DEMAND TV


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It’s Just a Painting Sorry if this is a bit rude..... The California Highway Patrol in the Los Angeles area recently found some amusement filling out accident reports in a series of car accidents. As it turned out, drivers were losing control and running into other vehicles upon seeing a giant woman's pubis displayed on the front part of an oncoming car. The CHP started frantically looking for the dangerous pubis and came upon the tracks of a young hairdresser named Nelly Node.

the CHP arrested the woman. The court ruled that Nelly's car was creating a dangerous situation on the roads. The girl had to paint over her car's hood. Here's a picture of her VW before she had to repaint it. I guess this little compact bug can rightfully be nick-named the "Quinny-Minnie". And was she charged with pubic indecency?

Nelly's passion for the arts made the young woman photograph her own crotch and put the zoomed picture on her Volkswagen Beetle. Nelly decided to use such a shameless method to prepare her college course work in which she analyzed the art of design. The witty student's idea worked for the college professors. She was proudly driving her 'pubic beetle' until

THE TOWN FRIER Traditional Fish & Chips take away Mick and Andrea welcome you! All your traditional favourites inc. Kebabs, Pies, Sausage, etc. Cooked freshly to order SHADED TERRACE


Telephone orders welcome


Cruce de Periana, Puente don Manuel, Alcaucin


Tel: 608 531 601 Opening times:

Tues, Wed, Thurs 12pm - 9pm Fri & Sat 12pm - 10pm Closed Monday & Sunday

TEL: (0044) 7850 575862 (0034) 667 235 205 Email:

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DKW Autos DKW S-line synonymous with care, quality and service for car owners Quality cars have often symbolised the glamour of the Costa del Sol, but the reality of buying and maintaining a vehicle on the coast has often been far from glamorous. DKW S-line in Velez-Malaga offers high quality services to the car owner on the coast. under the direction of Ignacio Casado, the team offers a wide range of quality pre-owned cars from such marques as Audi, Citroen, Ford, Mercedes, Honda, Volvo and many more. Finance packages and rental deals are available with great flexibility to ensure your specific requirements are met. Vehicles are prepared to the highest standards and the showroom located at C/ Camino Remanente nº16, VelezMalaga, reflects the quality, cleanliness and care that the business offers to all clients. Nowhere demonstrates the commitment to excellence that DKW S-line has to its clients more

Happy New Year

than the workshop. Getting reliable and warranted work done on your car can be very hard to do sometimes but DKW has a 1,000m2 workshop equipped with the most modern equipment to keep your car at the very peak of performance and safety. The garage works with all the insurance companies and they ensure that the best parts and techniques are employed on your car whether you require a routine service or you are unfortunate enough to have been involved in an insurance claim. What DKW S-line does differently to other garages is customer service (they appreciate how important your car is to you and how devastating it can be to be kept of the road) DKW´s mission stretches the whole journey of car ownership, from buying your vehicle to it’s maintenance and any necessary repair until it’s time to sell and move onto something new; they can even buy your car from you. DKW S-line Automotive Services s.l. is without doubt a strong and viable total solution for motoring on the Costa del Sol. Telephone garage: 951 390 875 e-mail:


Happy New Year

Home Improvements

Covering The Axarquia and surrounding area since 2003

Repairs to Glass Curtains and all double glazed products OTHER SERVICES  Windows Mosquito Screens Solar Film Pool Surrounds Conservatories Repairs to all glazing products

Offer up to 50% off if ordered in January & installed in February

Call: 645 066 502 Email:


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Golfing great Ben Hogan's famous reply when asked how to improve one's game was: Hit the ball closer to the hole

Hospital provided that his body be allowed to preside over its board meetings. His skeleton was clothed and fitted with a wax mask of his face. It was present at the meeting for 92 years.

Howdy Doody had 58 freckles

In the movie The Phantom Menace, Darth Maul's voice was also dubbed over. (In Star Wars James Earl Jones did Darth Vadar's voice.) Also, the actor who played Darth Maul had no previous acting experience. He is a stunt man who came to the set to show George Lucas what the fight scenes would look like

Howard Hughes once made half a billion dollars in one day. In 1966, he received a bank draft for $546,549,171.00 in return for his 75% holdings in TWA

The first ever indoor organised presentation hockey game was a 2-1 Creighton's team victory in Montreal on March 3, 1875, in Victoria Skating Rink.

Jeremy Bentham, a British philosopher who died in 1832, left his entire estate to the London

Hershey's Kisses are called that because the machine that makes them looks like it's kissing the conveyor belt

Dead Egyptian noblewomen were given the special treatment of being allowed a few days to ripen, so that the embalmers wouldn't find her too attractive


Are you looking for a pool contractor who can Repair, Refurb or Construct a Swimming Pool? Look no further, because at Axarquia Pools we do it all w Re-tiling / acid cleaning and re-grouting w External electrical lighting, pool lighting, electrical pump refurbishment and renewal w Access ladders and step construction

w Construction of swimming pools / wet areas and external showers w Leak detection and repair w Salt systems w Pool covers / safety nets w Pool automation A leak equal to 2mm in diameter in your swimming pool will lose 1,500 litres of water in a day. If you are adding 5 - 7cms of water to your pool a week, you have a leak.

With our high-tec equipment, we can detect leaks in Swimming Pools, Depositos, Spa Baths and mains water feeds. If you think you may a have a leak, call us today on 666 659 876 or email:

For more detailed information, please visit our comprehensive website at: or email us at: or phone Calvin on: 666 659 876 Fully registered company, established 2003 Part of the Active Construction group of companies




APARTMENTS iN ALgARROBO COSTA ON FRONT LiNE TO BEACh holiday apartments and for the winter season

CAR RENTALS STANDARD CARS AND AUTOMATiCS Delivery and collection at the airport or at your location

CONTACT US Tel: 0034 952 511 209 Email:

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Holidays around the World Noted Holidays in January

Japan – Second Monday

National Thank You month

National Human Trafficking Awareness Day in the united States – January 11

New Year's Day – January 1 Independence Day in Haiti – January 1 Handsel Monday in Scotland and northern England – First Monday Three Wise Men Day, or Epiphany, in Latin America, Spain, Puerto Rico and Dominican Republic, and is, although not celebrated as widely or in the same way as in countries with a Spanish history, an official holiday in many European countries, for example Austria, Italy, Sweden, Finland, Liechtenstein, Slovakia and Croatia, as well as in parts of Germany and Switzerland. – January 6 Russian and ukrainian Christmas Eve, also known as Svyat Vechir – January 6 Plough Sunday in Scotland and northern England – Sunday after January 6 Coptic and Russian Orthodox Church Christmas – January 7 Coming of Age Day (成人の日 Seijin no hi?) in

Makara Sankranthi (Festival of Harvest) in India – January 14 Third Sunday is Pongal in India and Feast of the Santo Niño in the Philippines Martin Luther King, Jr. Day in the united States – Third Monday The uniting of Moldavia and Wallachia under the same ruler in 1859, Romania – January 24 Burns night in Scotland – January 25 Republic Day in India – January 26 Australia Day in Australia - January 26 Auckland Anniversary in Auckland, New Zealand – Monday closest to January 29

Bistro Bar Toasties, Soft drink, tea or coffee - 3€

Morning Bap - Sausage or Bacon tea/coffee - 3€

Freshly prepared breakfasts, snacks, light lunches and evening meals Daily Menu del dia for just €9.50 (3 courses) Delicious Sunday Roasts - 3 courses from just €10.95 all served with generous portions of fresh vegetables & yorkshire puddings from 1pm Selection of Homemade soups / Crusty Bread Happy Hour 6pm - 7pm Weekdays

Open daily 10am to late Friends Bar Bistro

Tel: 952 519 733

Cruce de Periana, Puente don Manuel




The Parcel Force to be reckoned with

Sending or Collecting items from uK or Europe Opening hours: Monday - Saturday 9am - 7.30pm / Sunday 10am - 4pm Arkwrights Puente don Manuel Supermarket




952 519 780 659 375 603

we accept all major credit cards Find us on the web: Email:

Friday Market

(Established for over 10 years) Chiringuito Antonio, Puente don Manuel Great market, Great atmosphere, Great prices!!! 9.30am - 1pm The stallholders wish everyone A Happy and Peaceful New Year!!

Use it or Lose it!!!

Not just a Market! *The Little Farm Shop *Taj Mahal Indian Restaurant (3 course special menu 9.50€) *Bird Park

Chiringuito Antonio Open 7 Days a week Specialities – Paella and Piri Piri Chicken Saturday Lunchtime - Moroccan specialities. Every morning – Coffee and bacon roll 2€. Saturdays - Live Music

Something for everyone, so come down for a great morning! New Stallholders always welcome New & Secondhand Only 1€ a pitch! Call Antonio: 695 635 242

Cafe - Bar “Serving a selection of new dishes and of course, Fresh Fish! Attractive prices”

Fresh Fish & Chips Cars, offices, patio doors, glass curtains and we can put the tint film into a roll down or vertical blind for occasional use. In fact: If it’s glass we’ll tint it! For more information contact: 958 496 571 / 644 546 176

With Salad or Veg Just 8€

Speciality Fresh Lobster 500grms - Just 18€

C/Marquita 3, Paseo Puerta del Mar, Almuñecar Tel: 958 630 245 / 629 882 696 You can find us near the old Post Office, in front of the entrance to the underground car park. Closed Wednesdays


To Advertise Call 664 210 468

Random Joke :) I found myself in a pub in Cork. A group of American tourists came in. One of the Americans said, in a loud voice, "I hear you Irish think your great drinkers. I bet €5,000 that no-one here can drink 30 pints of Guinness in 30 minutes." The bar was silent, the American noticed one Irishman leaving, no-one took up the bet. 40 minutes later the Irishman who left returned and said "Hey Yank, is your wee bet still on?" "Sure" said the American, "30 pints in 30 minutes for a bet of €5,000." "Grand so" replied the Irishman, "pour the pints and start the clock." It was very close but the last drop was consumed with 2 seconds to spare. "Ok yank, pay up." said the Irishman. "I'm happy to pay, here is your money" said the American. "But tell me, when I first offered the wager I saw you leave. Where did you go?” The Irishman replied, "Well sir, €5,000 is a lot of money to a man like me, so I went to the pub across the road to see if I could do it."

Recipe Of The Month Creamy Potted Prawns These can be served as a starter or as a light lunch or supper dish. The mixture also makes a perfect filling for jacket potatoes. ingredients: 50g/2oz butter 4 spring onions, trimmed & finely sliced 450g/1lb prawns, thawed if frozen 200g pack cream cheese with chives 1 tbsp double cream Few slices smoked salmon lemon juice to taste 1-2 tsp creamed horseradish sauce freshly ground black pepper Method: 1. Melt the butter in a saucepan add the onions and cook very gently for 1 minute. Add the prawns and cook for a further minute. Allow to cool. 2. Place the cream cheese in a mixing bowl with the cream and mix until smooth. Add the cooled prawn mixture and mix in with lemon juice, horseradish and black pepper. Taste and adjust seasoning to taste.

B O A R D i N g C AT T E RY Canillas de Aceituno

We offer safe, tranquil accomodation for your cat. Our pens are safe and secure but with all the comforts of home, making it very cosy. Only 20 mins from Torre del Mar, inland towards Vinuela, Campo Cats is a short 2 min drive from a main tarmac road which gives very good access. We welcome inspection visits where we can discuss your cat’s personal needs. We only accept cats that are fully vaccinated Also, we can provide a collection & delivery service. For further details, call Linda on: 665 510 735 Campo Cats Cattery

3. Slice slivers of smoked salmon and lay in the bottom of ramekin dishes, divide the prawn mixture between the pots. Garnish with thin slices of spring onion and more slivers of smoked salmon. 4. If using as a starter serve with slices of buttered brown bread or Melba toast.

Inmobiliaria PUENTE DON MANUEL ALCAUCiN Ref: 2945 600m2 plot, 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, kitchen and lounge, pool

136,000€ OLiAS

Ref: 2024

Huge finca of 75,000m2 with 3 houses. Rustic country house with very big lounge with chimney, a conservatory from the bedroom with balcony, floor heating and fantastic views. There is also a stable, 3 small wooden houses and 2 wells. The last 1.5km is good track. 30mins from coast


El Limonar / Málaga

Ref: 2932

Reformed and very light flat of 155m2 in a highly requested area. 4 rooms being used as office/bedrooms, all with parquet floors, modern kitchen, a small balcony and a big one of about 50m2, garage with store-room with direct access with lift to the flat. Nice views and only 300m from the beach


ALMAYATE Ref: 2935 House with 13,000m2 of land in Almayte underneath the motorway. The house has 2 bedrooms and 1 bathroom. Possibility of building another bedroom. There is a store-room outside


BENAJARAFE Ref: 2917 Very cute and hardly used flat of approximately 70m2 with nice sea views. With garage space including storeroom. At only about 200 m from the beach


Urb. La Sirena 113, 29790, Benajarafe Tel: Iris Werner 952 51 51 42 Mobile 629 888 170 More properties on


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Oh To Be Old! Couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things. During a checkup, the doctor tells them that they're physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember.. Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair. 'Want anything while I'm in the kitchen?' he asks. 'Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?' 'Sure..' 'Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?' she asks. 'No, I can remember it..' 'Well, I'd like some strawberries on top, too. Maybe you should write it down, so as not to forget it?' He says, 'I can remember that. You want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries.' 'I'd also like whipped cream. I'm certain you'll forget that, write it down?' she asks. Irritated, he says, 'I don't need to write it down, I can remember it! Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream - I got it, for goodness sake!'

german Mechanic (specialist in Vw)

Then he toddles into the kitchen. After about 20 minutes, The old man returns from the kitchen and hands his wife a plate of bacon and eggs.. She stares at the plate for a moment. 'Where's my toast ?' ------------------------------------------------------------An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen. The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, 'Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great.. I would recommend it very highly..' The other man said, 'What is the name of the restaurant?' The first man thought and thought and finally said, 'What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love? You know.... The one that's red and has thorns.' 'Do you mean a rose?' 'Yes, that's the one,' replied the man. He then turned towards the kitchen and yelled, 'Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?'

We have moved to bigger and better premises!!

Bodywork and Paint All mechanical work inc... Clutches, Gearboxes, Brakes, ITV work & Servicing we speak English

Tel: 952 50 33 00 or 679 931 702 Email: / Find us at Poligono industrial - C/ Velazquez, 33 Velez Malaga (Turn right at Axarqui Park and follow the road to nearly the end, we are on the left)


To advertise call 664 210 468 or email

The PB & J Campaign The environmental impact of lunch When I was younger and didn’t have a lot of money to spend on lunches outside the office, I often brought a packed lunch to work which usually (although not always) featured a peanut butter sandwich. My co-workers teased me about this habit, chalking it up to frugal necessity, but it really was a matter of preference. I really liked, maybe even loved, peanut butter sandwiches, and as a vegetarian at the time, it was also an easy way to get some protein into my diet. According to a new online initiative called the PB&J Campaign (referring to peanut butter and jelly, for those uninitiated into this North American tradition), it turns out I was not only saving money and my health, but the environment as well. Through their website at, the organisers behind the campaign lay out the facts about how incorporating this humble treat into your lunch plans can be a simple way to help the planet. Butter Me up The PB&J (Peanut Butter & Jam) Campaign gives four main reasons why choosing a

peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich over other types of lunch food can have a positive impact on the environment. These reasons are all based on how much of the earth’s resources are needed to produce a meal that contains no animal protein, such as a PB&J sandwich, versus a meal that contains animal protein, such as meat, eggs, or cheese. By chomping on a PB&J more often, an individual can make a difference in four areas, according to the campaign: global warming, water conservation, land conservation, and animal welfare. Because of the greater resources needed to raise livestock, the group argues that by eating a PB&J sandwich rather than a hamburger for lunch, a diner could save almost 3.5 pounds (1.6kg) of carbon dioxide emissions, and about 280 gallons of water. That meatless lunch could also preserve 12 to 50 square feet (about 4 to 15 square meters) of land from deforestation or other harmful practices. Lastly, a meal without animal protein would definitely have an effect on the animals concerned; the group estimates that eating 16 PB&J sandwiches is equal to saving the life of a chicken.

Di Carlo

Pan y Café

10 types of bread to choose for your breakfast

Coffee 100% natural - Delicious sweets - Eat in or take away

Di Menú - 4.00€

Di Menú - 5.00€

2. Soft drink/beer, Focaccia, Mini-bite

2. Soft drink/beer, 2 Mini-kebabs, 2 Mini-pizzas

1. Soft drink/beer, Bagel, Mini-pizza

1. Soft drink/beer, Salad, 2 Mini-pizzas

3. Soft drink/beer, 4 cold sandwiches

3. Soft drink/beer, Iberian ham & cheese, 2 Mini-bites Lunch & Dinner Avenida Andalucía, Torre del Mar (next to the church)

Tel: 952 967 956

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email


Winter Fuel Payment It’s that time of the year again you may receive your Winter Fuel Payment: If you get it, here is how to use it!

A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase gas and electricity..or a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

About this time of the year, older taxpayers will again be receiving another ' Winter Fuel’ payment once we've had a couple of weeks of decently cold weather. This is indeed a very exciting programme, and

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China? A. Shut up. Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the u.K. Economy by spending your ' Winter Fuel’ cheque wisely:

I'll explain it by using a Q & A format:

* If you spend the money at Asda or Tesco, the money will go to China, Taiwan or Sri Lanka

Q. what is a 'winter Fuel’ payment? A. It is money that the government will send to taxpayers. Q. where will the government get this money? A. From taxpayers. Q. So the government is giving me back my own money? A. Only a smidgen of it and only if you're old enough. Q. what is the purpose of this payment?

T H E  D O G  H O U S E While you are away on holiday or a weekend break, your dogs live in our house alongside our dog. *Large Enclosed Play Area

* If you spend it on petrol your money will go to the Arabs * If you purchase a computer it will go to India, Taiwan or China * If you purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico, Honduras and Guatemala * If you buy an efficient car it will go to Japan or Korea * If you purchase useless stuff it will go to Taiwan or China * If you pay off your credit cards or buy shares, it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore. Instead, keep the money in the uK by: 1. Spending it at car boot sales 2. Going to night clubs 3. Spending it on prostitutes

*Lots of Country Walks *Pet Collection / Delivery Service *Vet Services - On Call

4. Buying beer or whisky 5. Getting yourself a Tattoo 6. Visiting a bookie

*Gourmet Meals the Best fOR yOuR PaL’

(These are the only uK businesses still operating in the u.K.)

Ring: Phil (mob) 649 079 321 Email:

Conclusion: Be patriotic - go to a night club with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a car boot sale and drink beer day and night!


Comares / Benamargosa Ex - cat & dog Recommended

Refs Available

No need to thank me... just glad I could be of help :)


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Santa's Sleigh VS - US Military Plane: Which Is Faster? You might be surprised Norad, the institute tasked with tracking the sleigh on a yearly basis, has laid the facts on the table after a festive joke from Barack Obama Father Christmas' sleigh trackers have hit back at Barack Obama's claims that military planes can fly faster than Santa. And despite what the uS president says, Santa's sleigh outclasses a uS military C-130 jet in every single department - including weaponry. Mr Obama joked on Monday that their transport aircraft is "a little more efficient" than the big man's present-delivering craft, much to the annoyance of North American Aerospace Defence Command (Norad). Air defence chiefs tasked with tracking the sleigh on a yearly basis, have come up with a fact sheet to prove the world's most powerful politician wrong. Santa's sleigh is powered by hay, oats and carrots, carries 60,000 tonnes of presents and travels at 186,000 miles per SECOND. The magical carriage flies "faster than starlight" with a massive engine of nine RP (reindeer power) and climbs at a staggering One "T" (Twinkle of an eye). It carries 60,000 tonnes of gifts with the sleigh itself weighing a whopping 75,000gd (gumdrops) at take off. It is even heavier upon landing - 80,000gd due to ice and snow accumulation, which latches on to the 75cc (candy canes) or 150lp (lollipops) long sleigh. It turns out that the heroic sleigh, that delivers presents to more than 22 million children worldwide, outclasses the jet in every department even weapons. The C-130 tops out at a measly 417 miles per hour - practically stationary in comparison - and can only manage a tiny payload of 44,000 pounds. While the sleigh was the main focus of Norad's stats, there are also some interesting tidbits about Father Christmas himself.

Santa Claus weighs 260 pounds on take off, but after eating all the cookies and milk on the way round, he comes back 1,000 pounds heavier - at 1,260 pounds. A spokesperson for Norad said: "We really don't want to compare Santa's sleigh to a C 130, but what we can confirm is that Santa's sleigh is a versatile, all weather, multi-purpose, vertical short-take-off and landing vehicle. "It is capable of travelling vast distances without refuelling and is deployed, as far as we know, only on December 24th (and sometimes briefly for a test flight about a month before Christmas)." For nearly 60 years, Norad and its predecessor, the Continental Air Defense Command (Conad) have tracked Santa's flight. Full Stats Designer & Builder - K. Kringle & Elves, Inc. Probable First Flight - Dec. 24, 343 A.D. Home Base - North Pole Length (without reindeer) - 75 cc (candy canes) / 150 lp (lollipops) Width (without reindeer) - 40 cc / 80 lp Height (without reindeer) - 55 cc / 110 lp Weight at take off - 75,000 gd (gumdrops) Passenger weight at take off - Santa Claus 260 pounds Weight of gifts at take off - 60,000 tonnes Weight at landing - 80,000 gd (ice & snow accumulation) Passenger weight at landing - 1,260 pounds Propulsion - Nine (9) rp (reindeer power) Armament - Antlers (purely defensive) Fuel - Hay, oats and carrots (for reindeer) Emissions - Classified Climbing speed - One "T" (Twinkle of an eye) Max speed - Faster than starlight

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Funnies! The British Penny - European Union Directive No. 456179 In order to bring about further integration with the single European currency, the Euro, all citizens of the united Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland must be made aware that the phrase "SPENDING A PENNY" is not to be used after 31 December 2014. From this date onwards, the correct term will be: "EuRONATING" It is hoped that this will be a great relief to everyone.

Upsetting News On average, British men will have sex two to three times a week, whereas a Japanese will have sex only one or two times a year. This is upsetting news to me, as I had no idea I was Japanese.


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Faceless Sorry about that, I’m looking for my wife and I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going

She’s tall, blonde hair, green eyes, long legs, big boobs and she’s wearing tight white shorts, a tight top and no bra

What a coincidence, I’m looking for my wife too! Maybe we can help each other, what does yours look like?

What does yours look like?

Doesn’t matter, let’s look for yours!!

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Dare To Be You We are a strange race. We have enormous potential, but as individuals we are often afraid to use it, or don’t believe we’re worthy of all the good stuff. I heard a story once that I think illustrates it perfectly: Once upon a time there was a farmer that was out walking in the mountains where he lived. At one point for some reason he looked down, and there at his feet lay an egg. He picked it up and put it inside his jacket. When he got home he laid the egg under his set hen to see if it would hatch. Lo and behold, a few days later it did, but the creature that came out of the egg wasn’t an ordinary chick. It was a baby eagle. Time passed. The eagle learned how to peck and scratch the dirt for food, but deep down inside he knew that something was missing in his life. He just couldn’t put his feather on it. Then one day he heard a strange sound and looked up. There, high above him was a large bird soaring majestically on the air currents. A longing from deep inside him welled up and before he could stop the words he said: “Oh, I wish I could do that!”

Happy New Year!

One of the old hens had seen what had happened. She walked over to him, looked up too, and said: “Son, that’s an eagle. Eagles were born to fly high and be free. We’re just chickens and our lot in life is to scratch the ground, peck and cackle, flap our wings a little and be grateful to the farmer for the grain he gives us.” The story ends there. It doesn’t tell what happened to the baby eagle. This story is really ours. Often we deny who we are out of fear for what someone will say, or maybe we feel that we’re too old, or just not worthy of the life we really want. The truth is that we are all magnificent; we were all meant to do marvellous things, to live amazing lives. Don’t let anyone – including yourself – tell you that you’re not good enough. You’re never too young or too old to follow your heart or your dreams. It’s never too late to start living. Dare to be who you really are and you’ll be amazed at the results. Mary Ann Grayson Torre del Mar


Next Market 13th January

Every Tuesday 9.30am - 1.30pm

Come and enjoy a cool relaxing morning at Los Jardines del Trapiche, THE nicest market venue on the Costa. EASY PARKING Outside courtyard and function room full of fabulous stalls offering something for everyone. Browse at your leisure and enjoy a coffee in the beautiful shadey gardens Take the A-272 turning onto the Velez-Malaga road A-356. Turn off at El Cruce restaurant towards Benamargosa. Over the roundabout and we are on the left just before the private airfield


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he ns he to the w ht ch ho elig– mu ns, wp. m i l fa -u n the nno p’s eak nto n Le grou ’s br i d oh he up lte t pu atle J y of e gro a t a n h e t B ma r sc wa rriedst of her fo a u m isg ed d blam

k Yo

no O o

Born: February 18, 1933 in Tokyo, Japan Spouses: Toshi Ichiyanagi (1956 – 62), Anthony Cox (1962 – 69), John Lennon (1969– 1980) Children: Sean Lennon, Kyoko Chan Cox

While living in New York's artsy Greenwich Village, Yoko discovered the world of avant-garde artists, and was heavily influenced by Andy Warhol. Her most famous artistic event was the ‘cut piece,’ staged in 1964, where the audience was invited to cut off pieces of her clothing until she was naked. Her marriage to Anthony Cox was stormy, and she met – and began an affair with -- John Lennon at an exhibition of her art in a gallery in London. He was also still married (to Cynthia) at the time. In 1968, Yoko’s marriage to Cox ended, but he kidnapped their daughter during a weekend custody visit. Cox won custody of Kyoko after claiming her mother was unfit because of drug use, and had her brought up under an assumed name.

Yoko is a multimedia artist, singer, and peace activist. She is also known for her work in avant-garde art, music, and filmmaking.

Yoko and Kennon searched for her for years, but Yoko did not see her until 1998.

Her first name means ‘Ocean Child’.

Yoko suffered a miscarriage of what would have been Lennon’s male child on November 21, 1968.

Her father became head of a Japanese bank in San Francisco in 1935; he did not meet Kyoko until she was two years old because she stayed behind in Tokyo with her mother. Back in Japan, Yoko and her family were forced to beg for food while pulling their belongings in a wheelbarrow when escaping the fire-bombing of Tokyo. When Yoko was 18, her father was appointed president of a bank in New York, where the family went to live. Yoko dropped out of college to elope with first husband, composer Toshi Ichiyanagi. When they eventually divorced, Yoko was so depressed she was sent to a mental asylum.

The famous documentary ‘Bed-In,’ made in 1969, is the filming of the peace event Ono and Lennon staged on their honeymoon. Yoko co-wrote the songs ‘Give Peace a Chance’ and ‘Revolution’. Her music also proved to be highly influential particularly to post punk ‘new wave’ bands such as Talking Heads, Blondie and The B-52s.

Local Car and Van Hire Rent on a daily, weekly, monthly or long term 4 x 4, Automatics & 7 seaters Airport collection/drop off Also available to rent cars and vans one way to uK, France and other European countries Also light removals and man with a van

Tel: 951 904 660 Mobile: 667 235 205


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Helping Axarquia How the Spanish tax reform affects the declaration of foreign pensions A pensioner who is a resident for tax purposes in Spain is not obliged to file an income tax return if their income does not exceed 22,000€. However, if they receive a foreign pension, this threshold is fixed at 11,200€ per year. In effect, the Spanish law on income tax says that “any fiscal resident in Spain shall declare income tax for their worldwide income, regardless of its origin.” As a result of computer systems updating, and especially due to communication improvements between different countries – mainly European – the Spanish Tax Agency can be informed of taxpayers receiving foreign pensions, as well as their payment references and amounts. Consequently, control and inspection actions can be carried out to verify if taxpayers have declared in Spain the amounts received from these pension schemes.

The Spanish tax reform, which has recently been approved by Parliament, has fixed an amnesty period during which taxpayers may voluntarily delare their liabilities and pay any money owed, including any sanctions, surcharge and interest that may be applied. This period, which also allows taxpayers to request reimbursement of surcharges, interests and sanctions which may have been paid through regularisations already filed, begins on January 1, 2015 and runs until June 30, 2015. For more information, please write to The information provided in this article is not intended to be legal advice, but merely conveys general information related to legal issues. See main advert below

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New Year Traditions However you chose to celebrate New Year, here are some New Year traditions around the world Auld Lang Syne The most commonly sung song for English-speakers on New Year's eve, "Auld Lang Syne" is an old Scottish song that was first published by the poet Robert Burns in the 1796 edition of the book, Scots Musical Museum. Burns transcribed it (and made some refinements to the lyrics) after he heard it sung by an old man from the Ayrshire area of Scotland, Burns's homeland. It is often remarked that "Auld Lang Syne" is one of the most popular songs that nobody knows the lyrics to. "Auld Lang Syne" literally translates as "old long since" and means "times gone by." The song asks whether old friends and times will be forgotten and promises to remember people of the past with fondness, "For auld lang syne, we'll tak a cup o' kindness yet." hogmanay (Scotland) The birthplace of "Auld Lang Syne" is also the home of Hogmanay (hog-mah-NAY), the rousing Scottish New Year's celebration (the origins of the name are obscure). One of the traditions is "first-footing." Shortly after midnight on New Year's eve, neighbors pay visits to each other and impart New Year's wishes. Traditionally, First foots used to bring along a gift of coal for the fire, or shortbread. It is considered especially lucky if a tall, dark, and handsome man is the first to enter your house after the new year is rung in. The Edinburgh Hogmanay celebration is the largest in the country, and consists of an allnight street party (visit their Hagmanay website here). Oshogatsu (Japan) The new year is the most important holiday in Japan, and is a symbol of renewal. In December, various Bonenkai or "forget-the-year parties" are held to bid farewell to the problems and concerns of the past year and prepare for a new beginning. Misunderstandings and grudges are forgiven and houses are scrubbed. At midnight on Dec. 31, Buddhist temples strike their gongs 108 times, in a effort to expel 108 types of human weakness. New Year's day itself is a day of joy and no work is to be done. Children receive otoshidamas, small gifts with money inside. Sending New Year's cards is a popular tradition—if postmarked by a certain date, the Japanese post office guarantees delivery of all New

Year's cards on Jan. 1. Spain The Spanish ritual on New Year's eve is to eat twelve grapes at midnight. The tradition is meant to secure twelve happy months in the coming year. The Netherlands The Dutch burn bonfires of Christmas trees on the street and launch fireworks. The fires are meant to purge the old and welcome the new. greece In Greece, New Year's day is also the Festival of St. Basil, one of the founders of the Greek Orthodox Church. One of the traditional foods served is Vassilopitta, or St Basil's cake. A silver or gold coin is baked inside the cake. Whoever finds the coin in their piece of cake will be especially lucky during the coming year. United States Probably the most famous tradition in the united States is the dropping of the New Year ball in Times Square, New York City, at 11:59 P.M. Thousands gather to watch the ball make its one-minute descent, arriving exactly at midnight. The tradition first began in 1907. The original ball was made of iron and wood; the current ball is made of Waterford Crystal, weighs 1,070 pounds, and is six feet in diameter. A traditional southern New Year's dish is Hoppin' John—black eyed peas and ham hocks. An old saying goes, "Eat peas on New Year's day to have plenty of everything the rest of the year." Another American tradition is the Rose Bowl in Pasadena, California. The Tournament of Roses parade that precedes the football game on New Year's day is made up of elaborate and inventive floats. The first parade was held in 1886


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Fresh green beans are very low in calories (31 calories per 10g of raw bean pods) and contain no saturated fat. Nevertheless, these lean vegetables are a very good source of vitamins, minerals and plant derived micronutrients. The beans are very rich source of dietary fibre (9% per 100g RDA) which acts as a bulk laxative. Fibre helps to protect mucous membrane in the colon by decreasing its exposure time to toxic substances as well as by binding to cancer-causing chemicals in the gut. Green beans contain excellent levels of vitamin A, and health promoting flavonoid poly phenolic antioxidants such as lutein, zea-xanthin and Ă&#x;-carotene in good amounts. These compounds help act as protective scavengers against oxygen-derived free radicals and reactive oxygen species (ROS) that play a role in ageing and various disease processes. Zea-xanthin, an important dietary carotenoid in the beans, is selectively absorbed into the retinal macula lutea in the eyes where it is thought to provide antioxidant and protective uV light filtering functions. Therefore, green beans offer some protection in preventing age-related macular disease (ARMD) in the elderly.

(pyridoxine), thiamin (vitamin B-1), and vitaminC. Consumption of foods rich in vitamin C helps the body develop resistance against infectious agents. In addition, beans contain healthy amounts of minerals like iron, calcium, magnesium, manganese, and potassium, which are essential for body metabolism. Manganese is a co-factor for the antioxidant enzyme, superoxide dismutase, which is a very powerful free radical scavenger. Potassium is an important component of cell and body fluids that helps controlling heart rate and blood pressure.


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Snap beans are a good source of folates. 100g of fresh beans provide 37 Âľg or 9% of folates. Folate, along with vitamin B-12, are one of the essential components of DNA synthesis and cell division. Good folate diet, when given dur

Ever thought about Artificial Grass? It is the perfect solution; green, lean and clean! Almost all surfaces are suitable. Enjoy your garden all year round.

ing preconception periods and during pregnancy, helps prevent neural-tube defects in newborn babies.

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They also contain good amounts of vitamin-B6

619 317 211



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Benaque ia a little known and very small village that is a hop, skip and a jump away from the larger village of Macharaviaya. There is even a 2 kilometre walking track between the 2 villages called the Ruta de Salvador Rueda after the Hamlet´s most famous son , the poet, who was born here on December 3rd 1857. If you have never heard of Salvador Rueda a visit to Benaque will quickly put that right! On entering the village the road is called Calle de Salvador Rueda, the school is called Colegio de Salvador Rueda, the bar is called Salvador Rueda and the house he was born in bears a plaque showing he was born there and outside stands a bronze bust with his face. This simple house of his birth is a fitting place for the self taught son of a labourer who himself called it a “poor house”. A p a r t from the e n o r m o u s church of Virgen d e l Rosario, a brick building that dominates the village and is so huge that the only place to photograph it is 2 kilometres away! there is very little else to see. Salvador Rueda has certainly left his presence in this sleepy Hamlet as his poems have left their mark on the history of Spanish arts, he being their first modernist poet. The hometown he


loved and visited so often during his lifetime deeply influenced his poetry: La campiña cuando sales se inunda de luz alegre, y las hojas de las ramas baten las palmas al verte. The countryside when you are is filled with joyous light, leaves and branches clapping to see you De dos montañas distintas corren al mar dos arroyos, y en el camino se juntan para no caminar solos. Two different mountains two streams flow into the sea, and on the road they meet so as not to walk alone

To find Benaque turn off the autovia following signs for Macharaviaya, after 11 kilometres just before the last turn on the road you can see the village of Benaque in the distance at an altitude of 240 metres with the church standly proudly in its centre and then Macharaviaya two kilometres below it.

Property of the Month Los Iberos


87m2 3 bedroom townhouse with beautiful gated garden, small above ground pool and secure parking area in this small hamlet just 6km from the beach and 10 minute drive to Almayate / Benajarafe. The property comprises front covered terrace, fully fitted kitchen with breakfast bar and gas hob, dining room, lounge with pellet burner, upstairs to 3 double bedrooms, roof terrace with partial sea view and the family bathroom. Extras include rejas, insect screens, persiana blinds. Set in a tranquil, Spanish area. Furniture and a car are negotiable

PROPERTY SPECiALiSTS SiNCE 2001 iF YOU hAVE PROPERTY TO SELL CALL SALLY ON 626 038 851 or 952 436 781 Email:

Sally harrison Owner / Agent


AS2953 120,000€ Comares Charming 101m2 property to modernise on 1,200m2 plot

AS2946 285,000€ Viñuela 2 112m centrally heated 3 bed, 3 bath villa on fenced 13,750m2 plot

AS2952 349,000€ Puente don Manuel 270m2 3 bed, 4 bath luxury villa with games room and bar area

AS2949 98,000€ Almáchar 100m2 3 bed village house with store room

AS2547 100,000€ AS2950 335,000€ Comares Churriana Detached 55m2 400m2 Bar/Restaurant bungalow on 116m2 with 3 beds, 4 baths, plot with garden and patios, 2000m2 plot sea views


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Joke Book

The Light Column

Still available!! Yours truely has put together a joke book containing 84 pages of solid jokes & funnies. No pictures, no spaces, just pure unadulterated laughter. A great stocking filler!!!! “A great read” “I couldn’t put it down” “Tears were rolling down my face” “I literally laughed my socks off”

Priced at just a fiver, it’s a must buy to keep by the loo! Available at the Trapiche Market on Tuesdays or The Friday market in Puente don Manuel. Alternatively, email: or call Tony: 664 689 138

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The Light in Spanish, titled El Libro de Sabuduria, is now out in the Spanish language so please share the news with your Spanish chums! Although the book is not yet available in book shops here in Spain, it is available to purchase from the Spanish version of Amazon... It is also sold in book shops in Central America, Mexico and Colombia – although we wouldn’t expect you to travel all that way just to buy a copy! Hopefully it’ll be available in book stores in Spain later in 2015. The Spanish publisher is rolling out to different Spanish speaking countries bit by bit :) I’m delighted to report that there’s a total of $17,000 in the charity pot now and the first donations will be made to the 7 chosen charities at the beginning of 2015. Keidi Keating - The Light


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10 Strangest Museums Museum of the Penis - The Icelandic Phallological Museum in Iceland is a museum devoted to phallology. As of 2006, the museum houses 245 specimens displayed like hunting trophies, embalmed in formaldehyde, or dried in display cases. The museum attempts to collect penis specimens from every mammal in Iceland, including several species that are endangered or currently extinct in Icelandic waters. Sigurður Hjartarson, a former teacher, is the founder and director of the museum. The museum also exhibits a few specimens from mammals not living in Iceland, as well as folkloric specimens and penis-themed art. Toilet Museum - The American Sanitary Plumbing Museum is the butt of a lot of jokes. It's also a shrine to the history of plumbing. The joke is that in most museums you generally have to search for a toilet. Here, toilets abound, some of them dating back to the early nineteenth century. You'll see ornate porcelain toilets, chain-pull toilets with high wooden tanks, and an "earth cabinet" that collected the user's waste in lime instead of water. There's even toilet paper from the 1800's, referred to back then as "boudoir paper." The museum was founded by Worcester plumbing equipment distributor

Charles Manoog in 1979. Manoog was getting ready to retire and says he wanted to give something back to the profession. Today, his son Russ Manoog runs the distribution business. Down the street, in a refurbished warehouse, Russ's wife, B.J. Manoog curates the only known plumbing museum in the world. New Orleans Historic Voodoo Museum The primary purpose of this museum is to represent the traditional practices of the Voodoo religion in New Orleans. The New Orleans Historic Voodoo Museum brings together ancient and modern day Voodoo practices. While you are visiting the Museum, you may wish to have one of the practitioners prepare a special GrisGris bag just for you or someone you may know. The Museum also houses artifacts of the Great Voodoo Queen, Marie Laveau.


FOR EVERYTHING TELEVISION Providing Solutions to the ever changing Television Services by Satellite and Terrestrial TV Why not visit one of our weekly Saturday Demonstrations and see how we can provide a solution for you (not IPTV) BBC, ITV, SKY, SPANISH, TV REPAIRS TV SOUND SOLUTIONS FOR THE HARD OF HEARING

Call 657 484 853

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10 Strangest Museums Museum of Menstruation - The Museum, located in a suburb of Washington, D.C., is devoted to the rituals and culture of menstruation. Visitors can see exhibits tracing the history of pads, tampons, special menstrual underwear, and more. As the Museum's brochure explains, "A particular weight is put on the history and philosophy of menstrual hygiene advertising; the museum owns over 1,000 ads from many countries, as well as patents, booklets and other printed and visual material." Museum of Questionable Medical Devices The Museum of Questionable Medical Devices shares his collection of the hilarious, horrifying, and preposterous medical devices that have been foisted upon the public in their quest for good health. Includes the Prostate Gland Warmer, Phrenology Machine, Recto Rotor, Nose Straightener, Wonder Electro Marvel, and hundreds of other weird devices. Founder Bob McCoy retired and closed the St. Anthony Main location of the museum in 2002, donating his devices to the Science Museum of Minnesota, which still displays a small number of items in their Collections Gallery. Nut Museum - What happens when more than

100 nutcrackers, nut masks, paintings and sculptures of nuts, and a collection of mixed nuts from the nationally recognised Nut Museum lose their home? They find a new one at Connecticut College where author and Professor of Art History Christopher Steiner and his students have been sorting, cataloging, and archiving every piece in the collection, some of which will be exhibited at the college when Tashjian will be present. He is truly "nuts". Burger Museum - Harry Sperl, a German immigrant living in America (where else?), has collected more than one thousand hamburgerrelated items. The collection includes more than 500 different hamburgers and some pretty unusual burger material. There are biscuit jars, clocks, hats, trays, erasers, badges, magnets, music boxes, a pencil holder, salt and pepper shakers and, of course, the waterbed, which is complete with a sesame seed covered spread and matching pillows. There are signs, posters, glasses, cups, bowls, stuffed toys, T-shirts, towels, calendars and postcards. Most of the material was picked up at flea markets and garage sales, where Harry trawled for burgers with friend and fellow enthusiast Ron Baynton.

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People Who Come And Go Case study of the folk who buy and sell in our area - Mirjam, from Holland

book sitting in the sunshine is good! And walking through the countryside with Avi, my dog.”

Mirjam, a political lawyer from Amsterdam, has chosen this part of Spain to look to make a change of life. Given the opportunity of early retirement from a hectic job, she is now on the hunt for a new home in La Axarquía. I asked her what draws her to Spain.

Mirjam has just put an offer in for a traditional style country house near Velez-Malaga so we hope to see her around our lovely part of Spain soon!

“The language and culture, the food, the outdoor living and of course the glorious weather! I am looking for a spacious house, with a garden, that is secure for my dog and big enough to house all the things I cherish. My friends are demanding space to stay too – so, it’s got to be a home, and not just a place for an extended holiday.” Although moving lock stock and barrel to Spain is a change of lifestyle, Mirjam does not envisage a huge change in her daily routine. “Just a lot more outdoor living would be refreshing! Exploring new places, practicing up my Spanish, and learning more about the Spanish culture are all part of my plans. I like to meet new people, but I appreciate my own time too. A good

Below a photo of Mirjam in Canillas de Aceituno

Written by Toni Waterman from Unspoilt Andalucia. See advert below


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g n i z fe ish a i m L A ine tarf Mar er S

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They are members of the specie crinoids, marine animals that make up the class Crinoidea of the echinoderms

Crinoids usually have a stem used to attach themselves to a substrate, but many live attached only as juveniles and become freeswimming as adults There are only about 600 extant crinoid species, but they were much more abundant and diverse in the past Some thick limestone beds dating to the midto late-Paleozoic speciames are almost entirely made up of disarticulated crinoid fragments

Crinoidea comes from the Greek word krinon, "a lily", and eidos, "form" They live both in shallow water and in depths as great as 6,000 metres (20,000 ft) Sea lilies refer to the crinoids which, in their adult form, are attached to the sea bottom by a stalk In those deep-sea species that still retain a stalk, it may reach up to 1 metre (3.3 ft) in length, although it is usually much smaller The terms feather stars, or comatulids, refer to the unstalked forms Crinoids are characterised by a mouth on the top surface that is surrounded by feeding arms They have a u-shaped gut, and their anus is located next to the mouth Crinoids feed by filtering small particles of food from the sea water with their feather-like arms. The tube feet are covered with a sticky mucous which traps any food that floats past. Once they have caught a particle of food, these tube feet can flick it into the ambulacral groove, where the cilia are able to propel the stream of mucus towards the mouth Sea urchins are one of the crinoids’ main predators Although the basic echinoderm pattern of fivefold symmetry can be recognised, most crinoids have many more than five arms.

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Pastel Exhibition


Probably the first of its kind!! A pastel exhibition in Andalucia

Interesting facts about the month of January

Students taught by Heather Harmen. Almost 70 paintings by 13 artists - all apart from one Heather taught all of these artists from holding their first pencil and they only had two hours to practice each week!!! Heather can reveal that on the opening night four pieces were sold!!

"January, from the Très Riches Heures du Duc de Berry January is named after Janus (Ianuarius), the god of the doorway; the name has its beginnings in Roman mythology, coming from the Latin word for door (ianua) - January is the door to the year.

Well done to Heather and all the class! See main advert on page 92

Traditionally, the original Roman calendar consisted of 10 months, totalling 304 days, winter being considered a monthless period. Around 713 BCE, the semi-mythical successor of Romulus, King Numa Pompilius, is supposed to have added the months of January and February, allowing the calendar to equal a standard lunar year (355 days). Although March was originally the first month in the old Roman Calendar, January became the first month of the calendar year either under Numa or under the Decemvirs about 450 BCE (Roman writers differ). In contrast, years in dates were identified by naming two consuls, who entered office on May 1 and March 15 before 153 BCE when they began to enter office on January 1." "Various Christian feast dates were used for the New Year in Europe during the Middle Ages, including March 25 and December 25. However, medieval calendars were still displayed in the Roman fashion of twelve columns from January to December. Beginning in the sixteenth century, European countries began officially making January 1 the start of the New Year once again — sometimes called Circumcision Style because this was the date of the Feast of the Circumcision, being the eighth day from December 25." "Historical names for January include its original Roman designation, Ianuarius, the Saxon term Wulf-monath (meaning wolf month) and Charlemagne's designation Wintarmanoth (winter / cold month)." "In Finnish, the month is called tammikuu, meaning month of the oak, but the original meaning was the month of the heart of winter, as tammi has initially meant axis or core. In Czech this month is called leden, meaning ice month In ukrainian it is січень meaning cutting or slicing perhaps referring to the wind."


Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts they can see a single house which seems to still have electricity. upon more investigation, they discover that it's actually their house, occupied by alternate versions of themselves.

Film iew ce RevCoheren

That's the basic premise behind Coherence.

A bunch of friends, most of whom sort of dislike each other, try to have a nice and relatively sane dinner party, the same night a comet is expected to fly overhead. unfortunately, the comet screws everything up. The lights, phones, and internet all suddenly stop working. Down the street

As we watch this group try to grapple with the strangeness down the street, we come across the same sort of paranoia we might expect from such a setup. Tensions flare not just from activity involving the other house, but from drama solely within the main house as well. In the end, Coherence doesn't add up to much more than a fun Twilight Zone episode, but that doesn't mean it's not worth your time. As a science fiction film based on quantum mechanics, one that frequently comes up with good enough ideas to battle its occasional faults, Coherence is the kind of film that you’ll love watching. Star rating: ****/*****

b .a ho ns H e a t h e r Gofathei lportrait H asociety r m aofnAmerica Member Member of the five top pastel art societies Award winning British tutor

Explore your artistic creativity in 2015! New Beginners class starting in January New enrollees welcome for her ever popular drawing and painting classes - now in their fifth year in Spain. Whether a total beginner or a returner to painting, call Heather for further details

Lake ViĂąuela - Mondays & Fridays For further details call Heather Tel: 628 306 371


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Find The ............? 5 animals - Last month’s answer on page 109

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Highest Quality, Lowest Price!! stores located at: avda. andalucia, CaLeta De VeLeZ & tORROX COsta

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s e p o c s Horo by Juanita Banana of ARIES: March 21-April 20 The relationships you’ve cultivated over past years are showing results which, for even better rewards, you should reinforce and form close bonds. Take advantage of good luck this month, ask for a raise or buy a lottery ticket TAURUS: April 21-May 21 Although sometimes encountering considerable resistance, you are always willing to stand up and fight for what’s right, for yourself but especially for others. Carry on with important assignments but ensure there are no mistakes, especially in legal conflicts, and avoid the traps of unscrupulous people GEMINI: May 22-June 21 The new year offers you opportunity and enthusiasm to seek greater knowledge and intimacy. With a high level of expectation, you would benefit from working alone at this time. Not a good time to appreciate travel CANCER: June 22-July 22 Change defines 2015 for you, with transformations in relationships, places and people around you. During January there is an opportunity to expand a business, start one or develop a new area. Also a good time to get away, think things through and better define your goals

LIBRA: September 23 - October 22 Worries and tension will lesson this year while cheer and joy pervade. Despite your tendency to engage with unsafe businesses, everything you now do will succeed. However, if your life feels predictable and monotonous look for an adventure, travel somewhere you’ve long wanted to visit SCORPIO: October 23 - November 21 2015 is a release for you as negativities fall away and you emerge as a new person with focus and energy. Relax responsibilities, overcome obstacles to increase communication with loved ones and, importantly for Scorpios, express your natural and extensive artistic talents SAGITTARIUS: November 22 - December 21 During 2015 a profitable and rewarding change of career, following exchange of thoughts with others, is indicated. To this end, try to erase inhibitions and network! Your personal magnetism opens social doors as, even if your views are not shared, your sincerity and beliefs are admired and respected CAPRICORN: December 22 - January 20 2015 is a time of serenity and peace for Capricorn, a year in which you can explore spirituality. During January, entertainment and love are at the forefront, and thoughts of a Bohemian lifestyle you’ve long coveted. You can profit from gambling, family generosity and unexpected gifts from women. Make sure they are deserved!

LEO: July 23-August 23 Start 2015 by organising outstanding issues, some you may have been working on for the past two years. Relax, enjoy the company of friends, and prepare for a challenge. Exsisting relationships are simplified and more pleasurable but single Leos may be attracted to a very different type from anyone previously encountered

AQUARIUS: January 21 - February 19 During the first ten days of January you feel pessimistic as costs exceed budgets and you struggle to assess and repair. Following on there will be surprises as you embark on a journey that has significant impact later in life. A thrilling and unusual love affair may commence. As the month progresses, your freedom and ability to address important issues grows

VIRGO: August 24-September 22 Try to curb your natural impulsiveness with caution! Your circle of friends and acquaintances will expand and you may meet rich, famous and powerful people. Be very careful not to get involved for superficial reasons, and ensure you can grow through them. Beware of assuming a haughty attitude and remember those that have always stuck by you

PISCES: February 20 - March 20 Relationships may seem confusing and difficult but this is not a good time for Capricorns to engage in negotiation or contract, albeit that the other parties are totally honest. The less you allow others to affect your course of action, the more freedom you will experience


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s iary e t a D he D on T Whatu´sr area? r o o F in y Every Tuesday Bar Atila, Puente don Manuel, Quiz 8.30pm. 682 502 870 Every Thursday Evening Bar Viva, C/Dr Maranon, Torre del Mar. Bingo Quiz night with a difference. From 8.30pm with cash prizes. Now hosted by yours truely, Tony of The Sentinella. Come on down for a great evenings entertainment. Call 952544362 Nerja History Group meets the first Friday of each month at the Cultural Centre, Calle Granada, Nerja at 11.30. For more information, contact Jill Christian-Smith on: 952 538 526 664 760 405 Oct 12

POCAPECUNIA, the Charity shop in aid of the Love A Child Foundation, has reformed the shop and is twice as big now. We are still always in need of clothes, household items, paperbacks, CD's and DVD's. Opening hours: Mon-Sat from 10am to 1.30pm. Calle Bella Vista 6 in Nerja (between the Parador and Hotel Villa Flamenca). Every Wednesday learn to draw and paint. Art classes at La Vaqueria, Benamargosa. 11am1pm, 10€ includes refreshments and home made cake! See advert on this page. Classes with Heather Gail Harmen b.a hons Every Monday and Friday in Lake Vinuela. Always welcome new enrollees for her ever popular drawing and painting classes now in their fourth year in Spain. For further details call Heather 628 306 371 heather harman’s students first Exhibition “Pastels International” Fri 12th Dec – 2nd Jan at Municipal Art Gallery Alcaucin Heather will also be exhibiting Golf: TOGS (Torrox Golf Society) if you would like a friendly but competitive game of golf each Sunday morning at Baviera, then why not join TOGS, possibly the friendliest Society on the Costa. Email: or call Captain: George Clay on 625 936 814 La Vaqueria, Benamargosa Closed in January, re-opens Tuesday 3rd February

AXARQUIA MARKET GUIDE Every Tuesday Country Farmers Market between 10am and 1.30pm. Los Jardines del Trapiche Call: Anita 627 877 164 Every Friday Chiringuito Antonio Market, 10am - 1.30pm Puente don Manuel. Vinuela Ecological Farmers Market Opp. the Pharmacy. 1st & 3rd Sat each month. 10.3014.30. Fresh Handmade organic produce. Fruit & Veg, Cakes, Chutney & Jams, Sweets, Tarts, Bread, Pasta & Fresh Sauces, Mustards, Olive Pate, Natural Soap, Fertilizer, etc Market alternate Saturdays Algarrobo Costa, (1st & 3rd Saturday each month).

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Da For Thetes Diary Scottish Country Dance Classes Every Tuesday n evening from 7.15pm - 9pm at El Trapiche Restaurant, for all levels, with or without partners. For further information please contact George Bain on 619 069 966

Shortmat Bowls in Nerja have relocated to the lower salon of Villa Flamenca Hotel, C/Andalucia, Nerja. Contact Marian on 952 523 754 or Malcolm on 952 520 579.

RBL - Nerja We have regular lunches on the 1st Friday of each month at “La Pena Parda “restaurant in La Herradura and at Al Andalus hotel in Maro on the 3rd Thursday of each month. Non members are most welcome and should contact Marilyn on 952 526 423 ( or Dave on 654085811 ( to book, also anyone interested in joining the Legion.

SEEKING CHARITIES - People helping People Do you know of any SPANISH Charities (O.N.G) who help people and are seeking funding? The American International Club is currently seeking Spanish Organisations who are seeking assistance. The organisation will be presenting a donation at the Dia de Residente event this April in Nerja. If you are aware of an organisation that assists Spanish people, please send an email with contact information to

RBL - Benajarafe Branch Meet every Friday from 12.30-2.30pm, at the coastal, Puerto Niza restaurant, we enjoy bingo, quizzes, more entertainment & monthly outings, a superb lunch inc. drinks, & we welcome all new and existing RBL members. Tel: 603 879 308 The "El Valle Asociacion" Based around the Lake Vinuela & surrounding areas. Meets on the first Mon of the month at 7.30pm at the Camping Bar on the side of Lake Vinuela (A356). Or at Billy´s bar near the market at Venta Baja from 11am to 12.30 every Friday The club organises events, trips and social functions. Volunteers needed. The Costa Animal Society needs your help, particularly with their efforts at the Sunday car boot markets in Nerja and Almuñecar. If you have some time, and especially if you own a 4x4 or other large vehicle, your assistance in transporting and selling goods on a Sunday morning would be much appreciated as both these markets help raise much needed funds to care for rescued animals. If you can assist CAS in any way - fund raising, airport runs or fostering - please call Wendy at 660 271 984 or Vera at 680 315 880.

Coral CoraXalia Do you like singing? We are inviting new male and female singers to become members of the local choir, Coral CoraXalia. Good atmosphere, all nationalities, good repertoire, performances, social events, possible touring, etc. Rehearsals on Thursdays 17.30 - 20.00 in Vinuela village, Casa de Cultura. Plenty of free parking. Come and join us! For more information, call 669 682 139 English / 689 111 352 Spanish From our humble beginnings in El Morche, our U3A has grown both in numbers of members and the area that we have activities. We now have more members than ever and reach out to Competa and Canillas de Albeida as well as along the coast with our groups. We also have a new Web Site where you can see the activities we offer and contact us for further information. Not only have we brought people with common interests together, many of our members have made new friends with fellow members. Please take a look at the website and contact us if you would like to know more or be part of us. Perhaps you have a subject or knowledge that you would like to form a new group around. We would love to hear from you. Please use the “Contact us” facility on the website.


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? n O s ’ t Wh a

Sponsored by:

RIGHTS ARKW The British Store & More OPEN ALL “OuRS” Puente don Manuel Call: 952 519 780

Royal British Legion Torre del Mar For information on events tel. 663 658 354 We meet every Wed at La Vega Rest Torre Del Mar next to Mercadona E-mail: / Lux Mundi Ecumenical Centre, Lux Mundi Ecumenical Centre, Torre del Mar. Avda. Moscatel 1”I”, (Jardines Viña Malága/Antigua Casa de la Viña), Torre del Mar, 29740. Opening hours Mon through Fri10.00 to 13.00 and 15.00 to 18.00. Tel.952 543 334 E-mail; Web: Please also see the web site for daily activities in the Centre. Thurs, Fri, Mon & Tue 1st/2nd/5th/ 6th – Centre closed for Public Holidays. Wed 7th – The Centre re-opens for activities. Mon 12th – All groups re-start in the Centre. Thur 15th – Coach excursion to Gibraltar. Ticket price 12€ available at the Centre, profits for fund raising. Departure times Puente don Manuel (Hotel Ramero) 6.45h, Algarrobo (Lidle) 7.15h, Caleta 7.20h and Torre Del Mar (Bus Station) 7.30h. Depart Gibraltar 15.00h. PASSPORTS REQuIRED. Sun18th to Sun 25th – A Week of Prayer for Christian unity. Please come and join us, this is an opportunity to make visible the friendship and unity amongst the Christian Churches established in the Costa del Sol. Each day there will be Ecumenical prayers at different churches, for full programme information please see the media and our web page: Mon 19th – Coach Excursion to Marbella. Please come and join Lux Mundi, Torre del Mar on a coach excursion to visit the Old Town of Marbella, After the visit there will be free time to enjoy lunch and on the return journey you will call at the La Cañada shopping Centre, where there over 150 shops. Ticket price 22 Euros, available at the Centre, proceeds to

fund raising. Departure times Viñuela (Football Pitch) 8.20h, Algarrobo (Lidle) 8.50h, Calet 8.55h, Torre del Mar (Coach Station) 9.00h. Monday 26th – Quiz Night. Please come and team up with friends and pit your wits in this fun quiz. It is a light hearted evening which includes supper and one drink, bar is also available. There is a Prize for the winning team. Ticket price 5 Euros, available at the Centre. All proceeds to fund raising. Time 18.00h for 18.30h. FEBRuARY EXCuRSION TO BARCELONA AND MONTSERRAT. Please come and join friends on a 4 day coach and train excursion in February starting on Monday 16th /17/18/and 19th. On the first day the coach will depart the Torre del Mar area arriving at Malaga train station to catch the AVE train at 8.40h, which will arrive in Barcelona at 14.25h. You will be met at the station by a coach which will transfer you to the 3* Hotel Gaudi, situated in the heart of the city, in front of which is the famous Antonio Gaudi masterpiece of the Güell Palace and only 100 meters from the Ramblas. The rest of the day is free. After breakfast on the second day you will be issued with a bus pass for the “Hop- on, hopoff “ Tourist bus, which gives you time to explore at your leisure the fascinating architecture of this beautiful city, the Park Güell, Sagrada Familia Cathedral, Plazas Reial and de Catalunya and much more. On the third day after breakfast, you will join the coach to visit the Benedictine Montserrat Monastery situated in the mountains and reached by a cable car. There is also an opportunity to hear the Basilica boy’s choir perform Gregorian chants and other pieces of religious choral music. The last day there will be breakfast at the hotel and the remainder of the day is free until you catch the train at 15.15h returning to Malaga at 21.40h. The price is 395€ double room and 455€ single€ room. Non refundable deposit of 100€ and final payment by 15th January, tickets available at the Centre. The price includes transport, transfers, hotel (bed and breakfast), Tourist bus for 1 day, visit to Montserrat and cable car and travel insurance. All proceeds to fundraising. Departure times Viñuela (Football pitch) 6.30h, Algarrobo (Lidle) 7.00h, Caleta 7.05h Torre del Mar (Bus station) 7.15h. For further information and bookings please contact the Centre, Tel 952 543 334

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What’s O n? Lake Vinuela Social Club We meet the 1st Thursday in every month at Bar Atila, Puente Don Manuel from 12 midday till 2pm. We provide an active and varied social programme and always welcome new members. For further information please contact 634 300 297 or email Come and Learn to Dance Ballroom & Latin American Dancing (11 different dances). *New beginners class 8.30-10.30pm (class and practise)*. Improvers, Intermediate classes and private lessons from 7pm or, just come and dance on a large floor 9.00-10.30pm. Qualified, v.experienced, patient teachers. Have fun learning or improving! Bar & friendly people. Partner not necessary. Cafeteria Avenida (near Police Station & petrol station) For more info call Eric and Jennifer 95 252 3599 (The Nerja Dance Club) The American International Club is a social club open to all nationalities which spans the area from Almunecar to Torrox and beyond. Activities include tapas runs, monthly excursions, petanque, coffee mornings, dinners and walks. The Club raises funds for Spanish charities and each year makes a significant donation to a local organisation as a way of saying "thank you" to our host nation. Our motto is "If it isn't fun, we don't do it". To join in the fun email: RBL - Los Romanes Branch We meet on a Monday in the Garden Bar, La Vinuela from 12.00 to 2pm. We are a small branch with a big heart and welcome all. You do not have to be an ex-member of the armed forces to either join or visit. Our aim is to have fun whilst making money for the RBL Poppy Appeal. Information can be obtained from our website or telephone Joyce, our Branch Sec. on 692 551 385. The Trapiche Social Club meets every Wednesday from 12noon to 2pm at the Trapiche Restaurant ( on the Velez to Vinuela Road) All are welcome to come and meet friends and make new friends. Pop in and see, a warm welcome awaits. call: 680764130 Want to join a choir? Coral Coraxalia on A7205, Casa Cultura at Viñuela invites new singers. Friendly, fun, all nationalities, good

repertoire, performances - Thursdays 17.30 – 20.00 free parking. Tel 669 682 139 MARGARET RIORDAN has two Art Exhibitions until March ‘15 at Bar Choto Playa on the N340 at Penoncillo beach, Torrox Costa, (not Tues). (next to Ruta 34 motorcycles shop) and in Restaurante Sevillano – El Rincón, Calle Gloria, Nerja. Move It To Music! classes take place in Nerja on Saturdays 11-12 noon, at the Time Sport Gym, Avenida de Pescia 21, Nerja. 5€ per class. This is an informal and friendly dance fitness class, ideal for the newly-retired. For more info contact 675 846 217 Phoenix Club meet every Tuesday in the Restaurant above Supersol (nr the Police Stattion) Torre del Mar from 12.00 midday to 1.30pm. For info call Gail 951 067 723 CardioDance: Learn to salsa, cha cha, swing and hustle to an aerobic workout. Dance classes also held in all these, plus rumba, salcha and choreographed routines. Call 606 086 300 The Nerja Players ......Oh What A Night! Yes, what a night it was for The Nerja Players as they sat down and tucked into a festive meal at the Sal y Pimienta on Tuesday 16th December to celebrate the end of a successful and enjoyable first half of their 2014-15 season.This half included a multitude of different play readings, a very informative talk on the “Essentials on Building a Character”, and a long awaited evening of Noel Coward songs and sketches compiled by our very own Ian Mortimer that delighted and titivated the assembled members and guests. This was so well received that Ian has been requested to repeat it next year. However the main thrust of the season was the highly acclaimed public performance of “Poetry of War – Homage to Remembrance” to mark the centenary of The Great War held at Nerja’s Casa Cultural. DVD videos of the show are still available from Club Treasurer, Peter Burch on 952526925. Club President, Joan Tarver, said: "We look forward to a full programme of events in the second half of the season, starting on the 6th January and also to welcoming new members and guests to our meetings." Watch this space for further information...


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n o i t a m r Info ...In our own random order! Bus Times Call: 952 540 936 Nerja-Malaga 06:30, 07:30, 08:30 08:55, 10:10, 11:10, 12:25, 13:40, 14:55, 15:55, 17:10, 18:40, 19:40, 20:25 Malaga-Nerja 07:00, 08:15, 09:15, 10:30, 11:45, 12:30, 13:00, 14:00, 15:15; 17:30; 18:45, 20:15, 20:45, 21:30 Expect to pay approx 2.90€ one way and 5.15€ round trip Nerja-Nerja Caves 08:10, 08:25, 09:40, 10:40, 11:50; 11:55, 12:35, 13:10, 13:35, 14:25, 15:25; 16:40; 18:10, 18:55, 19:30, 20:10 Nerja Caves-Nerja 08:45, 10:00, 11:00, 12:00, 12:15, 12:50, 13:30, 14:45. 15:45, 17:00 17:45; 18:30; 19:30; 20:15 Expect to pay approx 0.80€ one way Nerja-Torre see Nerja-Malaga times Torre-Nerja 07:45, 09:00, 09:15, 10:00, 11:00, 11:15; 11:45, 12:30, 13:15, 14:45, 16:00, 17:30, 18:15, 19:30, 21:00, 22:00. Church services in English Services at inglesia de San Miquel (St, Michael's Church) every Sunday at 12 noon (except during May) and at Capilla de Nuestra Señora del Carmen (Fisherman's Chapel, Chinasol). There is a short service of Holy Communion Wednesday's at 9.30am in the Church Shop, Calle Malaga, Nerja. Details of how to find the churches are also available in the Church Shop. Priest in Charge: Father Geoff Johnston Tel: Church House 952 521 339 Church Shop 952 522 460. Competa - Holy Communion every Sunday at 5.30pm in the Parish Church, Plaza Almijara, Cómpeta Tel: 952 219 396 Malaga - St. George´s Church in the Engish Cemetery. 11.00am Sundays Tel: 952 219 396 Velez-Malaga - Capilla De San Jose, Calle Linares 7, Velez-Malaga. Sundays 10.30.

Local Police : 091 guardia : 062 Fire : 080 Website Tel 952 407 050 Anglican communion. Torre del Mar - St Barnabas Church (IERE) Spanish episcopal services in English at 11am, Morning Prayer 1st and 3rd Sundays. Holy Communion 2nd and 4th Sundays. Tel. 952 030 461 (Priest). Lux Mundi Ecumenical Centre, Avda Moscatel 1 "I", (Gardens of Viña Malaga/ Antigua Casa Del Viña). Roman Catholic - Torre del Mar - Lux Mundi Ecumenical Centre, Saturdays 5pm, (Winter), and 18.00pm. Sunday Anglican Church of St. Barnabas (IERE) 11am. Morning prayer 1st & 3rd Sundays, Holy Communion 2nd & 4th Sundays. Torre del Mar Evangelical Church (Part of the Spanish Evangelical Church in partnership with the Presbyterian Church in Ireland) now meets every Sunday for Worship in English 11.30 am, in the Salon Torre of the Hotel Mainake Calle Los Fenicios 1 (last turning on right down Avenida Tore Tore before seafront). Everyone will be very welcome. Minister Rev Colin Dickson Tel. 654884658 Puente don Manuel - Fellowship of the King, Sunday Worship - 11am. Midweek activities Pilates - Wed 1.30-2.30pm, Bridge club tues 2.15-6pm, Charity shop/books open Wed, Fri & Sat 10-1.30pm. Bible Study Thursday 57pm. We meet at Fellowship of the King premises situated underneath Maroma Inmobiliaria, El Cruce de Puente don Manuel. Phone 952 115 220 or 952 518 185 Bank hours usually 8:30am-2pm except Sundays, Bank holidays and Fiestas. Please note, the majority of banks will not accept bills to be paid (ie: electric, phone, rates) after 11am. Taxis Torre: 952 540 016, Nerja: 952 520 537 Velez Malaga: 952 540 016, Puente Don Manuel: 952 510 992 Mob: 616 034 636.

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Ambulance : 061 water : 952 540 662 Electricity : 952 540 662 Tourist information Nerja: 952 521 531 Torre del Mar: 952 541 104


Dial 1002 to report a fault on the line. For general enquiries dial 1004

weekly Market days Mondays: Torrox Costa Tuesdays: Nerja & Country Farmers Market, at Jardines del Trapiche on the road to Benamagosa. wednesdays; Rincon de la Victoria, Algarrobo Costa & Camping Vinuela Ctr.A356 KM30. Thursdays: Velez Malaga & Torre del Mar & Frigilana Fridays: Puente don Manuel & Cala de Moral Saturdays: Caleta de Velez , Competa & Benajarafe, Algarrobo Costa, Opp Lidl (1st & 3rd Saturday each month) Sundays: Malaga Consulates Uk Opposite the main bus station Edif, Eurocom Bloque Sur C/Mauricio Moro 2-2º- Malaga 902 109 256 or 913 342 194 ireland Avda, de los Boliches, Nº15 Fuengirola 952 475 108 Netherlands/Dutch Avda, Palma de Mallorca, 57 Edif. Castillo San Louis, bajo 29620 Torremolinos 952 380 888 germany C/Mauricio Moro 2, Malaga 952 363 591 Sweden 952 604 383 France 952 226 590 / 952 214 888 Belgium 952 559 159 Denmark 952 211 797 Luxembourg 952 857 197 Telefonica



Airports Malaga 24-hour information 952 048 484 or 952 048 804 granada 952 048 804 Airlines Shops 10am - 2pm - 5pm - 8:30pm (generally) The municipal market (fruit and veg) and the weekly markets are only open mornings. water Supplies Velez Malaga: 952 506 450 Nerja: 952 520 154 Malaga: 952 135 013 Railway Stations Malaga: 952 360 202 granada: 958 271 272 Town halls Torre and Velez: 952 500 100 Torrox: 952 538 200 Nerja: 952 548 400 Competa: 952 516 006 Rincon: 952 402 300 Malaga: 952 135 000 hospitals Nerja Ambulatorio: 952 523 131 Velez Malaga: 951 067 000 iTV Call: 902 575 757 or 952 551 084 - Open Mon - Fri 08.00am 18.45pm, Sat: 08:00am - 12.45pm


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) : a h a Jokes h Two little brothers were getting dressed upstairs in the morning aged 7 and 5. “Do you think we are old enough to swear?” the 7 year old asked. “Yeah” replied the 5 year old. So the boys went downstairs to the kitchen and mum asked the 7 year old “What do you want for breakfast love?” “I want f*****g Frosties” The mum slapped him hard and kicked him all the way back upstairs to bed. “Now what do you want for breakfast sweetheart?” mum asked the 5 year old “Well I don’t want f*****g Frosties!” ------------------------------------------------------------A Muslim has been shot with a starting pistol; police say it's definitely race related. ------------------------------------------------------------Due to a water shortage in Ireland, Dublin swimming baths have announced they are closing lanes 7 and 8. ------------------------------------------------------------I got a letter from Screw Fix Direct thanking me for my interest, but explaining they were not a dating agency. ------------------------------------------------------------Such an unfair world. When a man talks dirty to a woman its considered sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man its £2.50/min (charges may vary) ------------------------------------------------------------Just booked a table for Valentine's Day for me and the wife. Bound to end in tears though she's crap at snooker. ------------------------------------------------------------Met a beautiful girl down at the park today. Sparks flew, she fell at my feet and we ended up having sex there and then. God, I love my new Taser! ------------------------------------------------------------Got a new Jack Russell pup today, he's mainly

black and brown with just a small white area so I've called him Bradford. ------------------------------------------------------------If you get an email telling you that you can catch Swine Flu from tins of ham then delete it. It's Spam. ------------------------------------------------------------They say that sex is the best form of exercise. Now correct me if I'm wrong but I don't think 2 minutes and 15 seconds every 6 months is going to shift this beer belly. ------------------------------------------------------------When I was a kid people used to cover me in chocolate and cream and put a cherry on my head. Yeah, life was tough in the gateau. ------------------------------------------------------------Carol, a blonde city girl, marries a Cornish dairy farmer. One morning, on his way out to check on the cows, farmer John says to Carol, 'The insemination man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows today. I drove a nail into the rail above the cow's stall in the barn. You show him where the cow is when he gets here, OK?' So then the farmer leaves for the fields. After a while, the insemination man arrives and knocks on the front door. Carol takes him down to the barn. They walk along the row of cows and when she sees the nail, she tells him, 'This is the one...right here.' Terribly impressed by what he seemed to think just might be another dizzy blonde, the man asks, 'Tell me lady, how did you know this is the cow to be bred?' 'That's simple; by the nail over its stall', Carol explains very confidently. Then the man asks, 'What's the nail for?' She turns and starts to walk away and with complete confidence, says over her shoulder, 'I assume it's to hang your trousers on.'

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Jokes h a ha :) One dark night outside a small town in Minnesota, a fire started inside the local chemical plant and in a blink of an eye it exploded into massive flames. The alarm went out to all the fire departments for miles around. When the volunteer fire fighters appeared on the scene, the chemical company president rushed to the fire chief and said, "All our secret formulas are in the vault in the centre of the plant. They must be saved. I will give $50,000 to the fire department that brings them out intact." But the roaring flames held the firefighters off. Soon more fire departments had to be called in as the situation became desperate. As the firemen arrived, the president shouted out that the offer was now $100,000 to the fire department who could bring out the company's secret files. From the distance, a lone siren was heard as another fire truck came into sight. It was the nearby Norwegian rural township volunteer fire company composed mainly of Norwegians over the age of 65. To everyone's amazement, that little run-down fire engine roared right past all the newer sleek engines that were parked outside the plant. Without even slowing down it drove straight into the middle of the inferno. Outside, the other firemen watched as the Norwegian old timers jumped off right in the middle of the fire fought it back on all sides. It was a performance and effort never seen before. Within a short time, the Norske old timers had extinguished the fire and had saved the secret formulas. The grateful chemical company president announced that for such a superhuman feat he was upping the reward to $200,000, and walked over to personally thank each of the brave fire fighters. The local TV news reporter rushed in to capture the event on film, asking their chief, "What are you going to do with all that money?" "Vell," said Ole Larsen, the 70-year-old fire chief, "Da first thing ve gonna do is fix da brakes on dat focking truck! -------------------------------------------------------------

A farmer decided he wanted to go to town and see a movie. The ticket agent asked, "Sir, what's that on your shoulder?" The old farmer said, "That’s my pet rooster Chuck. Wherever i go, Chuck goes." "I'm sorry sir," said the ticket agent "We can't allow animals in the theatre." The old farmer went around the corner and stuffed Chuck down his overalls, then he returned to the booth, bought a ticket and entered the theatre. He sat down next to two old widows named Mildred and Marge. The movie started and the rooster began to squirm. . . The old farmer unbuttoned his fly so Chuck could stick his head out and watch the movie. "Marge," whispered Mildred. "What?" said Marge. "I think the guy next to me is a pervert." "What makes you think so?" asked Marge? "He undid his pants and he has his thing out", whispered Mildred. "Well, don't worry about it", said Marge.. "At our age we've seen 'em all" "I thought so too", said Mildred, "But this one's eatin' my popcorn...!" ------------------------------------------------------------A little girl asked her father, "How did the human race start?" The father answered, "God made Adam and Eve and they had children, and so all mankind was made." Two days later the girl asked her mother the same question. The mother answered, "Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved." The confused girl returned to her father and said, "Dad, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Mum said they developed from monkeys?" The father answered, "Well, dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your mother told you about hers."


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s e g a P Puzzle Get Quizical

1. Which country do the Faroe Islands belong to? 2. P is the chemical symbol for which element? 3. St Helier is the largest town in which islands? 4. Hansen's Disease is better known as what? 5. Anne Frank's famous diary was written in which city? 6. Which city is the home of the Palais du Luxembourg? 7. In the Chinese New Year what year follows Rat? 8. Genuphobia is the fear of what? 9. Percy LeBaron Spencer invented what in 1945 in uSA? 10. St Peter was the first Pope - Who was second? 11. What is the literal translation of pot-pouri? 12. Which character did James Bond marry?

Hey Diddle Riddle

1. When is 99 more than 100?

2. What goes in the water black and comes out red? 3. A criminal is brought into a prison for major crimes. The warden informs him that he will be shot in the middle of the prison by 20 of his men. The prisoner is fine with that but he asks for some conditions: "All of your men must stand 20 feet away from me and I must be able to select where each of them stands. If I survive, I get to leave." The warden thinks about it and knows that all of his men will still have an open shot at the criminal, so he agrees. The next day immediately after the firing squad is positioned the criminal walks out untouched. How did he do it? 4. Two girls ate dinner together. They both ordered ice tea. One girl drank them very fast and drank five of them in the time it took the other to drink one. The girl who drank one died while the other survived. All of the drinks were poisoned. Why did the girl that drank more ice tea survive?

Answers on page 109

Sudokus Easy


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Puzzle P ages

Crossword Across


1 Disclose a personal plan (4,4,4) 9 Discomfit (5) 10 Sign posted in a public place as an advertisement (7) 11 Small branch (4) 12 Member of a local legislative body (8) 14 Two-wheeled horse-drawn covered carriage (6) 15 Cyprus town visited by the apostle Paul (6) 18 Junior variant of baseball (8) 20 Audio effect (4) 22 Feeling of joy and pride (7) 23 Inclines (5) 24 Everyone’s different! (4,2,3,3)

2 Jute clothing (7) 3 Light bulb unit (4) 4 Petroleum jelly used in bombs and flamethrowers (6) 5 NASA PC, me! (anag) (8) 6 Consternation (5) 7 Effected as much damage as an individual could (3,4,5) 8 Leave; die (4,3,5) 13 One devoted to a spare-time activity (8) 16 Blade in a frame under tension (7) 17 Statue base (6) 19 European currency until the end of 2001 (5) 21 Positive sign? (4)


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r e d a r T The

oto. t inc. ph r e v d a oxed th. 5€ for b th of the mon ll: 664 210 468 1 r o s d the 17 8 wor th or ca um of 2 made before th of the mon im x a m e 7 1 b 3€ for a Payment to before ll e n ti n ese ales@th Email s

Properties For Sale/Rent/Wanted Detached house with Lots Of Potential Fantastic West facing 3/4 bed house with perfect views and orientation to the south with all day sun, on large plot over two floors. 600m from the beach with stunning views of the sea and mountains. Top floor: 2 bedrooms with the possibility of one more, bathroom, living room, kitchen, separate dining room and log fire. Lower floor: Self contained apartment, 1 bed, kitchen, bathroom, living room, further room for 2nd bedroom/office/studio etc.. Private pool, various terraces and gardens, elevated views with easy access without steps. Outside kitchen with BBQ and a bread oven, automatic irrigation system and carport with automatic door access. 319,000€ Call: 696 116 552

RESTAURANT BUSiNESS FOR SALE Successful restaurant business for sale in Torre Del Mar. Running well for six years with continual growth over that time. Good main road location, friendly landlord and very affordable rent. No "goodwill" charge, just purchase the furniture, equipment and fittings in this well equipped establishment. Includes everything you could want for a turn-key business.

Serious enquiries to 606 511 019

ApArtment For SAle el morche

This one bed, one bath apartment is situated just two minutes away from the beautiful sandy beach of El Morche. It has a separate kitchen, balcony, marble floors, communal swimming pool and it comes fully furnished. It's an ideal starter home or holiday home.


For more info or to arrange a viewing call 610 976 284 or email

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3€ for a maximu m of 28 Pay wo Email: s ales@th ment to be ma rds or 15€ for esentine d e e before the 17nquire about b before 1 o th 5th of th of the month xed adverts e month . or call: 6 64 210 4 68

Properti es

Properties For Sale/Rent/Wanted

Items for Sale

ST LUCiA, ThE MARQUiS ESTATE, 1-bed luxury apartment for sale, 187,000GBP (currently worth 225,000GBP), development due for completion end 2014, SIPPS secured investment. Call: 610 976 284 for more details

LOgS FOR SALE 5€ a wheelbarrow load, self service. Palm Trees for sale, all sizes from 3€. Finca dos Mundos KM7, old road Trapiche/Vinuela. Dig up your own Palm Tree. Tel: 952 03 06 79

FLAT, 90M2, in Vélez-Málaga, new, 5 mins to schools, health centre, supermarket, bus station, highway and 5 km to the sea. 3 bedrooms, a prime quality furnished kitchen, 22m2 terrace, lift and garage. JuST REDuCED €159.000, NOW 110,000€ tlf: 606 764 539. Ready to move in. APARTMENT FOR SALE EL MORChE, 1 bed, 1 bath apartment situated just 2 mins away from the beautiful sandy beach of El Morche. With separate kitchen, balcony, marble floors, communal swimming pool and it comes furnished. Ideal starter home or holiday home. NOW 80,000€ Call: 610 976 284 hOLiDAY ViLLA SAYALONgA CAMPO Due to regular work in the uK, I am looking to rent my home on a flexible short- to medium-term basis. Ideal for a couple exploring the region or who would like to experience Spanish life before buying a property. Sleeps max. 4. Very quiet and private. Only 1.6km from village on good track. Secure garden, pets allowed, but do ask. Price 650€ p.w. high/ 550 mid/ 450 low season. incl. cleaning. Longer term reduced prices. / Tel 618 989 125 2/3 BEDROOM hOUSE TO LET in Benamargosa. Available for long or short term lets from 280€ pcm. Also holiday lets from 200€ per week. 2 mins to supermarket, bars and swimming pool. Call: 636 117 210 RESTAURANT AVAiLABLE FOR RENT in Torre del Mar. Large terrace. Call: 631 342 193

FOR SALE 2 BED MOBiLE hOME, good clean condition, recently decorated. 3,500€ Tel: 660 123 349 gOLFERS gOLFERS gOLFERS! unwanted Green Fee vouchers to most Costa del Sol Courses for sale, Most better than half price! Contact George Jamieson 0034 622 33 26 84 gENERATOR, PETROL. 240 volt 2.5kw, 2 mains sockets and 1 12volt. Schwarzbach SSG 2500. 150€ Call: 606 503 420 BEAUTiFUL TOY ChihUAhUA PUPPiES for sale from 350€ Call: 622 434 611 Also available on Whatsapp ChiLDS BikE SEAT for sale. 20€ Tel. 602 314 195

Wanted i wiLL COLLECT FREE of charge all your used clothing, bric-a-brac, pots and pans, books, toys, CD´s garden pots, tools, pieces of furniture or anything else you are throwing out whilst you are cleaning. Call me on Tel:- 625 319 323 Jacqui NEw MEMBERS FOR EL CAPiTAN TENNiS CLUB, Torre del Mar. Call 675 391 967


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WIN !!!!!

Competi tion

Your great little mag is bringing you a series of fiendish “Name that building” competitions in association with various local businesses This month is sponsored by Tk’s Restaurant in Torrox Costa

They are offering a prize of “A Sunday Dinner for 2 People” Simply name the famous building below. If you think you know the answer, then email it to: by 20th January 2015 THE WINNER FOR  DECEMBER WAS  MAGGIE RIORDAN  FROM TORROX CONGRATULATIONS !!!




Bar y Restaurante

Laguna Beach - Torrox Costa Tel: 952 968 100 / 696 516 534 December’s Answer: Lloyds building London

Please note: this competition is not open to employees of The Sentinella Magazine or TK’s. The competition is open from the 1st - 20th January 2015. The draw will take place on the 21st January and winner notified by the 1st February 2015. Only one entry per person. We will announce the winners full name in the February issue.

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s n e T p To 8 7 6 5 4 , 9 , 0



2, ,3, , , ,



The Top Ten Most Common Spanish Boys Names since 2000... 1. Alejando 2. Daniel 3. David

The Top Ten Most Common Spanish Boys Names in the 1920’s...

4. Pablo 5. Adrián

1. Jose 6. Javier 2. Antonio 7. Álvaro 3. Manuel 8. Sergio 4. Francisco 9. Carlos 5. Juan 10. Jorge 6. Pedro 7. Miguel 8. Luis 9. Angel 10. Jesús

get Quizical Answers 1. Denmark, 2. Phosphorous, 3. Channel Islands, 4. Leprosy, 5. Amsterdam, 6. Paris, 7. Ox, 8. Knees, 9. Microwave Oven, 10. St. Linus, 11. Putrid pot, 12. Theresa Draco

Last Month’s Crossword Answers

Riddle Diddle Answers 1. In a microwave. Generally when you run a microwave for '99' it runs for 1 minute and 39 seconds. '100' runs for 1 minute, 2. A lobster, 3. He set up all of the warden's men so they are standing directly across from each other. None of them could fire at the criminal because they would risk hitting another man, 4. The poison was in the middle of the ice. Find The Fox Answer December-

The Sentinella Paginas “The best A-Z Directory in the Axarquia” Your advert in print & online for just 60 euros for 12 months!!

664 210 468

Welcome to The Sentinella Paginas - the most comprehensive business directory covering the entire Axarquia region. Opposite you will find the phone numbers, email addresses and websites of services ranging from plumbers to dentists to restaurants. In fact, whatever you’re looking for, you’ll find it in The Sentinella Paginas! The flags visible on each listing indicate which language(s) the business owners speak, the first being their preferred language. We distribute 7,000 copies of The Sentinella every month, this is the most magazines that any one magazine distributes each and every month and contact details are updated each month to ensure accuracy. Prices are 30€ - 3 months, 40€ - 6 months, 60€ - 12 months. Book now for great cheap and effective advertising. Our next edition is February 2015 and the deadline for adding your business or service is January 17th. If you would like us to add a new category heading then we’ll be more than happy to assist. To place your advert: Email: or Call: 664 210 468

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email We can

list your


The Sen tinella Paginas

Busines s Call tod here from just ay on 6 5 euros 64 210 468 or E a month!! mail:

ACCOMMODATION wEscuela La Crujia rural B&B/guesthouse in a pretty converted schoolbuilding. 5 minutes from Velez-Malaga. Tel. 606 010 580. Email:

AIR CONDITIONING w For Air Conditioning call Mark at Esola, 616 119 007, Torre del Mar w Polar Air For Professional and reliable servicing, repairs and installation of A/C at competitive rates by a qualified technician.Call Susie or Peter 655 211 192 or visit w ChS Cooling and heating Solutions. All makes of air conditioning, serviced and installed. Also Solar, Heating and swimming pool heat pumps. Call: 655 791 167 Email:

ARTIFICIAL GRASS wAxarverde Maintenance free. Looks like real grass. Enviroment, child and pet friendly. Always green. Suitable for every surface. Call: 619 317 211 or visit our website:

BOAT TRIPS wLuxury Yacht Charters Tel: 618 972 139 wCaleta Cruise Club Tel: 634 382 609

BEAUTY & BOUTIQUE wLouise Beauty & Boutique, The Alcaucin side of Lake Vinuela. Call: 951 167 181 or 605 673 976

wThe hair & Beauty Studio Cruce de Periana, Puente don Manuel, (along from Morenos) Call: 951 204 158 or 693 740 575

BLINDS wSolar blinds, ideal for large glazed areas to keep the view but also giving privacy and stopping maximum amounts of heat/glare and fading of furnishings. Speak to Ian 644 54 61 76 958 49 65 71

BOOKSHOPS wPasatiempo Calle Infantes 32, Torre del Mar, 952 543 703,

BRITISH SUPERMARKETS wArkwrights English Shop. Turn right at Venta Baja Crossroads or call: 952 519 780 or 659 375 603

BUILDERS wAll types of building work undertaken, 37 years experience, Let me quote you. Call: 952 110 788 or 650 895 461 wLT Construction - is a building company based in the Velez Malaga area. We specialise in all aspects of design, building license application and construction, we have over 14 years of expertise in creating individual building solutions for our clients. Our local knowledge of the land and its soil types - and how best to deal with the challenges posed by them - means that we are the best-suited company to advise you on your building requirements. Call Lee Talbot on 659324586


Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

The Sentinella Paginas BUILDERS (cont)


wJohn housby, Building, Plastering, Tiling & Painting. For a quotation ring John: 699 261 414. Email:

wRoy’s Carpet & Upholstery Cleaning. Professional Machines, 18 years experience. All areas covered. Call Mark on 958 640 068 or 656 561 669

wNick Turner Refurbs All aspects of building work undertaken. Mobile: 679 113 600 Email: wConstructuion and reforms, all types of building and reform work including painting, swimming pools and gardens. All materials used from Almayate. With over 20 years experience. Call Sergio Mercado on 628 94 24 17 or email:

wSunshine woodwork and Building Services. Woodwork, building, plastering, bricklaying etc. Free quotation, no obligation. Call: 606 510 479.

CAR ACCESSORIES wwindow Tinting, A mobile service for your convenience, ITV legal & certified. Cut out annoying glare. Stop u/V. Protect Children & pets. Be Cool. Enjoy the sun don't suffer it! Call Ian 902 888 176/ 644 546 176

CARS WANTED wwanted all uK plated vehicles. Year 2000 onwards. cash paid. Call: 667 235 205

CAR AND VAN RENTAL wOne way car & van hire, uK, France and Spain. Call: 952 541 147

CARERS/AGENCIES wExperienced carer, available for all aspects of care from Hourly visits, respite care, companionship etc, for short or long term. Certification, CRB, Ref available on request. Areas covered Torre del Mar, Torrox, Velez Malaga. Call Deborah on: 680 665 949 wNerja Nurses, Professional Nurses, Reliable - Affordable - Local Quality Care. NHS Qualified & Trained - 25 years experience in ALL types of care. Tel: 628 793 413 or 952 030 713 Email:

CARPENTERS wAndrew Rodgers 20 years experience in kitchens, wardrobes, shelving, aluminium door & windows. Call the Window Doctor for any window problem. Roller shutter blinds, mosquito blinds, security locks, repairs and renewals reasonable rates, Tel: 660 597 894 email:

CHIROPODISTS wRegisitered Chiropodist/Podiatrist offering a complete footcare service in the comfort of your own home. 25yrs experience NHS & private. Call: 636 866 715

CHIROPRACTIC CARE wPhilippe Druart D.C., grad. from AECC (GB) and uSA, 30 years exp., opens a chiropractic clinic in Frigiliana, C/ Blas Infante, 2 bajo. Consultations: Monday from 16.30 to 20.30, Wednesday from 10.00 to 14.00, other days on appointment only. Tel. 951 708 672 & 678 691 387. Email:

CLINICS wAnalysis Clinic, Haematology, Coagulation (Contro of Warfarin), Biochemistry, Inmunology, Hormone, Bacteriology, Parasitology, Special analysis. Home visits for blood tests. Antonio Armijo Navas, Specialist in Clinical Analysis. urb. Costa del Oro, Local-4. Torrox Costa, Phone: 952 53 23 93

COMPUTERS All computer problems solved. Torrox/Nerja and surrounding areas. Free Advice. No Fix No Fee. Hardware, Software and Website solutions. PC service - only 50€. Call Rab on: 952 967 124 or 645 236 259 wComputer help.Troubleshooting & Repairs. New PCs supplied with Windows in English. WiFi installations. Reasonable rates. Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer since 2000. Patient & professional. Call David on 952 54 96 07 or 654 899 976.

DAMP CONTROL w“The Master Sealer” Damp Proofing & Plaster professionals, 20 years+ exp. 10 year guarantee on our damp proofing system. Fed up with flaking paint & plaster? Have it replaced & rectified once & for all at competitive prices. Call: 655 211 192

DENTISTRY wClinica Europa Centro internacional, Blq. 86, Torrox Costa. Call: 952 53 09 08 Email: British dentist, 24hrs response Call: 648 203 157 wian Pett Dental Care, 5 Star dental car you can trust. Now at Periana, Caleta & Canillas de Aceituno. Call Ian on 691700587 to consult about treatment, clinic location and arrange suitable appointments. Same personal service with gentle treatment a priority.

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email


The Sentinella Paginas DENTISTRY (cont) wDentadanes s.c Dental Clinic Offering Danish, top quality dental care at Spanish prices. Est. since 1991. We speak English, Danish, German, Spanish and Italian. Tel: 952 529 666 Mon-Fri 10-5pm

DOG GROOMING wThe Dog Shop, Professional grooming salon. All dogs welcome, any size, any breed. Tel: 645 525 782, Centro Comercial, 10, Torrox Park. Find us on facebook The Dog Shop Torrox wDogsbody grooming All Breeds Professionally Groomed by Canine Beautician. 35 years experience. Bath, clip, scissor, strip, teeth, glands, nails. La Zubia between Riogordo and Benamagosa. Mobile 693 539 749

DRAIN CLEARANCE wwayne’s Drains & Plumbing Est.1999. 24 Hour call out. Tel/Fax: 952 539 425. 24 Hour Service: 634 275 030 / 657 862 628 wAt Your Service Plumbing, Electrical, Prop. Maintenance Torre del Mar/Puente don Manuel area. Ex. Corgi reg. with over 35 years experience. Tel: 951 066 064 / 692 330 420 Email:

wZalia properties, long established sales rental agents, Lake Viñuela area. Car hire, Pool, Villa cleans etc. 9-5 Camino Venta Baja, 952 519 718 / 663 093 782, 696 206 158

ESTATE AGENTS/REAL ESTATE wFleming Properties, Calle Dr. Fleming, 1, Nerja. 952 524 140 or 637 278 306/606 087 362, wAxarquia Properties S.LCall; 626 038 851 or 952 436 Email: wBuy A home Spain Calle Pintor Cipriano Maldonado 7A, Edificio Salares, 29740, Torre del Mar. (Opposite the bus station) Call: 952 547 554 or 680 210 414. Email: Website:

FASHION ACCESSORIES wheaven for Fashion, Fashion jewellery and accessories at affordable prices - use code SENT12 for a discount of 15% with your first purchase.


wLeila’s Sewing Services, custom made clothes, alterations, repairs, weddings, christenings etc. Call: 622 105 809

wCudeca hospice Charity Shop – Torre del Mar C/ Infante 21 – Edf. Jamaica Bajo Tel: 663 083 273 MonSat 10.00 – 13.30 / Mon- Fri 17:00 – 20.00. Nerja C/ Almirante Carranza 15 Tel: 663 083 503 Mon-Sat 10.00 – 13.30



wElectro-Cute! English J.I.B. Electrician. For all your electrical needs and problems. Fault finding/Lighting and Power/Electric gates and Intercoms/Pool and water Pumps, Rewires/upgrades. Over 45 years exp. Tel Stefan 610 048 919 wElectrician - All jobs from a socket to rewires, Fault Finding and Intercom Systems. Call Andrew 618 640 155 Email: wSparkinspain - Electrical installations and maintenance. Local from Nerja to Velez-Malaga and inland to Competa and Frigiliana. Call Colin 951 242 449 or Mob 666 707 297 Web:

wMaintenance of gardens and Swimming Pools. English, German and Spanish speaking 24 year old. David: 656 775 928 Professional lady gardener will help you with garden cleaning, planting, maintenance and looking after your plants in your absence. Julia 634 495 856


ENGLISH TUTOR wEx-grammar School Teacher. BA(Hons) English Literature. QTS. TEFL.Ages 11 - 18, GCSE & A Level support.Learn English 1 to 1 or via SKYPE.Tel: 627 536 437.Contact:

EST AGENTS/PROPERTY RENTALS wSpanish Management Vinuela (next to the Farmacia) 666 135 516 or 650 702 258 Web: Email:

GARDENING SERVICES wRed Palm Beetles, Wasps, Ants, Woodlice, Mice, Rats and all pests. Processionary Moths. Call us for treatment and disposal of these garden problems. Tel: 634 431 099

GREETINGS CARDS wDoes your shop (all type of outlets can benefit) need a new look, we now stock and supply Jonny Javelin greeting cards as well as our own. Can supply spinners, its easy just contact us on 617 979 640 or e-mail

HEALTH & BEAUTY wweight Control - Herbalife Independent Distributor, Bea Savory, 95 253 4795 (business opportunity also available):


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The Sentinella Paginas wEsencia Natural cosmetics, incense, soaps, perfumes, makeup, face & body products and herbal tea. Avd Andalucia, 51, Caleta de Velez Call: 615 289 624 Email/Facebook

sion, Phobia, Stop smoking, self-confidence IBS, Public speaking as well as one day workshops for stop smoking, and self-healing, in NERJA. E-mail:


winsurance Essential Cover SL provide all types of insurance for your personal and business needs - Over 15 years’ experience in uK and Spain. Call Gaynor on 951 390 700 Email: or visit our website:

wRincón Natural Nerja: natural remedies, organic food, natural skincare products, spelt husk pillows, incense, feng shui crystals & tibetan bowls. Alternative therapies: personalised weight control coaching, massages, craneosacral therapy, metamorfic technic, beauty treatment AgeLoc. C/ Carretera 1, Nerja. Tel: 952 523 503

HEATING wRedwell® – the leading brand in Infrared Heating Systems. White panels and designs like mirrors, pictures, glass etc. Low consumption, low running time due to partial storage material inside. Prevents damp. Contact/showroom: Avda. El Faro, Bl. 75, bajo 9, Torrox Costa, call 952 539 742,, winfrasol infrared heating We are suppliers of infrared heating systems for your home or Business, Stops mould. Reduces Condensation. Cheap to run. Contact us on 951258010 / 635445279. Try before you buy. Email:

HORSE RIDING/TOURS whorse Riding Finca Don Carmelo, Periana. Guided horseback rides into the sierras, through olive and orange groves and down to lake Viñuela. Well behaved horses, all levels. Call 652200702 wPony Riding, for children. Main road Torrox-Competa between km13&14. The Pony Man Call:626 836 736

HOUSE CLEARANCES wCarousel Second hand Furniture, Vinuela Pueblo (under Cajamar Bank), access via steps at side of bank, or slip road behind bank. Open Mon - Fri 10am - 3pm. Call Gilly: 625 827 193 wCash paid. For House and Garage Clearance. Best prices. Get quote. All items considered. Contact Ernie or Martin 616 812 765 / 690 854 154

HOUSE / PET SITTING wCreature Comforts Keep your pets comfortable, your house safe and your garden watered while you are away. Also house maintenance undertaken. Mobile 693539749

HYPNOTHERAPY & NLP wMarion Dias BSc (honours) Clinical Hypnosis and trainer NLP & Hypnosis. Help with Anxiety, Depres-


INTERNET SERVICES wRiosat:SL, High speed internet and telephone services for home, business, offices, hotels, bars and restaurants etc. SDSL & ADSL packages available. Call: 951 239 310 / 626 679 018. Email: Web: http// wTooway Fast internet for everyone. SuperFast 18 MB Satellite Internet available anywhere. Tel: 667 440 632 Fast Reliable 3G Internet for Home & Away. Spain's largest national networks. All you need is reasonable mobile phone signal. Contract or PayGo Tel: 693 777 065

INTERNET TELEVISION (IPTV) wiPTV television No frills just like the good old days but up to date TV service. Tel: 951 390 567

INTERPRETERS winterpreter - English/Spanish - based in Vélez-Málaga. English nationality, but fluent Spanish and extensive experience. Inexpensive hourly rates. Confidentiality guaranteed. Call Toni to discuss your requirements. 952557733 / 606010580 wTranslator/interpreter service. For any situation where a Spanish speaker is required, eg: Town Hall, Hospital, NIE, Residencia, Social Security, ITV, reading and translating letters, written translations etc. Reasonable rates. Call Mariam on 633 637 774

KENNELS AND CATTERIES wwagtails boarding kennels for cats and dogs. Dogs walked 3 times a day in 36,000 sq metres fenced land. Phone Val 655 579 792 or Richard 645 659 935 or wThe Dog house While you are away on holiday or a weekend break, your dogs live in our house alongside our dog. Large play area, lots of country walks. Pet collection/del. service. Vet services on call. Gourmet meals if required. 'Only the best for your pal'. Ring: Phil 649 079 321 Comares/Benamargosa. Ex cat & dog airlines.uK. Recommended. Refs available.

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email


The Sentinella Paginas whome From home Dog Boarding at my 10,000m2 finca in Riogordo. No kennels just lots of excercise, fun and cuddles. Also within 15km daily home visits for dogs, cats, horses. Call: 678 189 019 or e-mail:

LAUNDERETTES Bubbles Launderette Calle Manuel Marin 1, Nerja. open 9am - 5pm Mon - Fri, 9am - 1pm Sat for all your laundry needs. Offering a free collection & delivery service for the nerja area. Call now on 665539256

LAWYERS wCarmen Silvia, Solicitors Abogados, Spanish solicitors, English Spoken, Torrox Costa, urb. Costa del Oro local 8, (very near Nota-ria Office). Free initial consultation, 952 967 004 Email:

LIVE ENTERTAINMENT wMusic Duo ( Covers from the 50´s to present day ), available for Weddings, Private functions. Bars etc. Now taking bookings for Christmas Parties. See for more details

MAINTENANCE wi.C. Services (New builds, restorations, plumbing, painting & maintenance) English - Colin 662 398 372 Spainish - Ian 633 587 148 Email:

MARKET GOODS wMr Clutter Wants your Goods, House and garage clearances, shops and bars - old stock, any item considered. Call David: 686 375 089 - or if preferred email a list to Cash available and efficient service, Now buying Antiques,Gold & Jewellery.

MECHANICS wFully Qualified City & guilds Mechanic, Servicing, Camshaft drive belt and much more. ITVs and ITV work carried out. Call: 696 578 771 or email:

MEDICAL CENTRES wDr. Bernadette Veeger General Medicine 952 532 065, 617 913 196. Consultations by appointment and house visits. English, Español, Deutsch, Francais, Nederlands. Centro Mar y Salud, Paseo Marítimo, El Morche/Torrox Costa,

wSimpleCare: a perfect way to access affordable private healthcare services at a fraction of the normal cost, specialist consultation from €24, annual membership €59., Tel 952532023, email wMedical Centre and Dental Specialist a team with over 25 years of experience, 5 languages spoken, available 24hrs. Block 88, Torrox Costa. English, German, French, Russian. Call: 952 530 357

METALWORK wMetalwork made to measure - Gates, Doors, Rejas. M.O.T. welding and on-site repairs. All areas. Also building work. All work guaranteed. We support the Axarquia Animal Rescue Charity. Andy: 952 517 502 or 676 719 066

MOBILITY PRODUCTS wBlue Badge Mobility.S.L Hire & Sales of Mobility Scooters, Wheelchairs, Bathroom aids, Toilet Aids, Stair Lifts, Long term rentals, Best prices on the Costa. Quality Service. Contact Gary Or Sara 952967015 /635445279

MOTORCYCLE REPAIRS wRods motorcycles. Mobile motorcycle service and repairs. From scooters to superbikes. All makes and models. Factory trained technician. Contact 633 287 190.

NURSERY EQUIPMENT wNursery Needs An established, quality nursery hire service for when babies & small children come to visit. All orders come with a free toy for the duration of the hire, please phone Dawn on 627 931 360

OPTICIANS wheiko by heiko, Avda Andalucia 119, Torre del Mar 952 967 923

PAPERWORK wTranslator/interpreter. Problem solving, document translation, interpreting at medical appointments, meetings with lawyers, builders, staff in banks, Town Halls, Guardia Civil and Police Stations..., obtaining/ renewing NIE, car and driving licence paperwork, everything you may need help with, even getting a licence for rowing on a lake! Call: Sara Bright on 658 501 610 - 951 167 094

PET COURIERS wPet Taxi- uK, France & Spain Delivered door to door. Call: 667 235 205

PLASTERERS wStockton Plastering and Damp Services Time served plasterer, 30 years experience in all aspects of plastering and damp proofing. Insurance approved and fully legal. Call: 648 243 656 for a no obligation quotation or visit


Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

The Sentinella Paginas PLASTERERS (cont) “The Master Plasterer” 20+ yrs Exp. Plaster and Rendering, coving, wall stitching and nylon matting specialist. Tel Darren 693 712 475

PLUMBERS wJust Plumbing. Just a quick and reliable plumbing service. Just a reasonably priced local business. Just polite, prompt and tidy. Just phone Dave on 689 647 849. Discounts in Riogordo, Colmenar, Comares. wAndy Mann Uk Corgi-registered Domestic Water and Gas services. All areas covered. Combi boiler technician. Emergency Breakdowns Tel: 633 875 588 Email: wgeneral plumbing and repairs, solar energy and air conditioning and sale of materials, installation and exhibition of baths. quote without commitment, paint work, reforms in general. Torrox Costa. Tel.: 952530121 Mobile : 675 837 255 e-mail : website :

PRINTER INK CARTRIDGES wink Cartridges for all makes of Printers. Original or Compatible. Tuesdays: Jardines del Trapiche Market. Fridays: Chiringuito Antonio Market, Puente don Manuel or call for free delivery 627 242 977 email:

PROPERTY RENTALS wBuy A home Spain C/ Pintor Cipriano Maldonado 7A, Edificio Salares, 29740, Torre del Mar Call: 952 547 554 or 680 210 414. Email: Website:

REMOVALS wMan with A Van, 7.5 tonne capacity, Ikea collections and fitting long and short haul, also roofing and decorating services. Call Steve 633 337 619 Email: wTransportation to Uk to Spain to Uk. Whole van loads or single items. Good rates. Regular trips. Also local removals. Call Graham: 620 353 594 Email:

RENT A CAR wRent a Car Estrella Rent Delivery and collection at Malaga airport or in your location. Automatic cars. unlimited kilometers, full insurance, VAT and additional driver included. - 952 511 209

wTaj Mahal (Puente don Manuel) Next door to Chiringuito Antonios, Venta Baja Tel: 952 510 886 / 667 934 731 wTaj Mahal (Torrox Costa) Ctra Vacional - 340 next to Post Office. 952 534 972 / 634 051 635 wRestaurant Caribe, Bloque 7, Local 13, Costa del Oro, Torrox Costa. Tlf: 952 530 831 wEl Pino Restaurant Torrox Park. New Spitroast Carvery menu every Sunday. Call: 952 968 106 /

SATELLITE T.V. wTotal Satellite installations Call Phil on: 629 556 266. wSky Costa Certified aerial/satellite installer. For all your satellite needs. Call for a free no obligation quote: 667 440 632 or email: wSky Shop Torre del Mar. Call: 667 235 205 or 952 541 147 wSat. Co. BBC & ITV for free & Sky Digital, dishes, alignments, installations. We also sell HD TVs. Call Tom 7 days a week for service. 657 484 853. All equipment delivered, installed & guaranteed for 2 years. Free demos every Sat. 2pm Technomate &TV repair service wTechno-Vision Satellite TV, Centro Comercial El Zoco, Nerja. Tel: 952 520 946 / 657 066 782 & 658 511 811. Visit our online shop at Email:

SECOND HAND SHOPS wSweethome Second hand Shop. Second hand furniture and decoration, Bric a Brac, etc. We also buy your unwanted furniture and undertake house clearances with delivery service or pick up. Email: Contact Patricia: 625255487. Jardines del Mar del Penoncillo, BLQ 32, Torrox Costa

SECURITY wPERFECT Alarm S.L., Caleta de Velez. High quality security systems, like video surveillance, alarm systems, perimetric protection systems, home automation. Worldwide surveillance of your property. If requested, we are licensed to connect to a monitoring station. We speak English and German. Call Mr. Martin on 608 517 661

SOLICITORS wDel Prado & Partners, specialists in many areas of Spanish Law. Call: 952 52 72 74 / 952 52 17 47



wTaj Mahal (Torre del Mar) Avenida Andalucia,Bloque Jupiter, Pasaje Timon 2, Calle Timon, Torre del Mar Tel: 952 547 798 or 665 675 053

wSTORAgE. STORAgE. STORAgE. Dry, Secure, Insured, Storage available, Long and Short-term. See for more details.

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email


The Sentinella Paginas STORAGE/PARKING


wCaravans/boats storage + general storage. 24hr security, best rates. Caravan storage from under 1€ a day. Long term discounts also available. Almayate Costa N340. Tel: 680 180 468

wSpanish - English - Spanish Translations Hospitals, Paperwork, Police visits etc... Good Rates. Call: 696 16 77 12


wTees & Polos Embroided & printed, TShirts & Polo Shirts. Great prices. Free design Call: 664 210 468 Email:

wAquamarine Pools - Maintenance, Technical Service, Installations, Repairs, Diagnostics & Consultations. Email: Tel: 600 811 355

TAXIS w 24 hour English speaking taxi Call Javi on 653 917 004 wNeed a Taxi, call Luis Gonzalez - Airport Services Algarobbo/Torrox area Call 606 15 33 23 / 628 23 91 83 or e-mail:

TELEVISION SERVICES want your T.V Channels back? We have two options via internet or via satellite dish. All areas covered. Call: Paul Anderson (Senior Engineer) 657 081 469 or 952 464 378

125 issues 125 Months


VETS wPet Vet Clinic La Herradura, Vaccinations, X-Ray, Dentistry, Operations, Pet Shop & More... C/Alhambra Nº3, La Herradura. Tel: 609 977 564

WEB DESIGNERS wSpanglish webs, Web designs, Database Programmes, Hosting, Domains, Real Estate Sites, English – Spanish Translation. All at realistic prices. Call Rachel: 951 70 46 27 or 691 660 187 Website: Email:

WINDOW TINTING wMobile service itv legal Solar reflective tint for glass curtains, balconies, yachts stop fading, heat ,glare, save money on cooling make living in the sun comfortable. 958 496 571-644 546 176

Call, email or Facebook us NOW for details & to book the above events: 952 54 00 80 / 664 573 923: Facebook ‘Legends Torre’ Calle Cipriano Maldonado Jiménez 9-G, Torre del Mar (next to Juayman Gym)


Buy a Home Spain

Avda. Andalucia, 125-A, Torre del Mar Tel: 952 547 601 / 649 123 068 Call us now on direct on a Uk number: 0044 207 048 2357


Ref.: 3673

Nice flat (85m2) with 3 bedrooms and 1 bathroom and near to the beach, fully furnished and fully fitted kitchen, own parking place, Community Pool and garden

Price: 99,000â‚Ź Canillas de Aceituno

Ref.: 3793

wonderful rustic style villa (5 beds, 4 baths / 275m2) with mountain views, independent guest apartment, partly furnished, f/f kitchen, fireplace, internet, SAT- TV, telephone, storage room, garden, Jacuzzi, a parking lot with a capacity of three vehicles, 42,000m2 plot

Price: 548,000â‚Ź


FP0760 A private, 84m2, two bedroom villa, on a 698m2 plot, built in a horseshoe design enclosing a very private 44m2 terrace and enjoying marvellous views to the marina and Mediterranean

REDUCED TO 249,000€




A smart stylish very modern townhouse of 90m². Lounge/diner/kitchen, 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, patio garden and great views,walking distance to town




1 bedroom apartment that has been modernised and offers plenty of rental potential. Lounge/diner/kitchenette, bathroom and balcony overlooking the community pool


Calle Dr Fleming, 1 Nerja. 29780 Tel: 952 52 41 40 Mob: 637 278 306 / 606 087 362

The Sentinella Axarquia January 2015  

The little mag that fits in your bag for info on the go

The Sentinella Axarquia January 2015  

The little mag that fits in your bag for info on the go