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The Axarquia Sentinella Edition No 88

December 11

Internet & Telephone Tel: 951 232 800 / 652 216 043 See advert on page 17

arkwrighTS The British Store & more

95 25 19 780


Tel: 952 96 79 23 Torre del Mar Tel: 952 52 83 95 Nerja See page 87

Merry Christmas & A Happy New Year

The little mag that fits in your bag for ‘info on the go’

Rent a Home Spain Buy a Home Spain We would like to thank all of our clients (propert y owners, buyers and tenants) for their support throughout 2011 and wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and a prosperous New Year. Best wishes from Angela & Austin Torre del Mar

For Rent

For Rent 400€ per month


For Rent

For Rent 600€ per month Los Romanes

For Sale 229,950€

Baviera Golf (Caleta)

For Sale 179,000€

Ref: R2 - 180 2 Bed Ground Floor Apartment (70m²) in town centre. Spacious lounge/diner, American-style kitchen, breakfast bar, 2 beds with built-in wardrobes, family bathroom, nicely furnished.

Ref: R4 - 077

4 Bed 3 Bath Townhouse (including separate apartment), 2 living rooms, large f/f modern kitchen plus American kitchen, front terrace, roof terrace, communal pool, close to supermarkets, bars & restaurants.

For Sale

Ref: S3 - 173

Fantastic 3 Bed 2.5 Bath Villa (172m² built 650m² plot) in ideal location with breathtaking views of Lake Viñuela, covered porch, hallway, f/f spacious modern kitchen, spacious lounge/diner with very large terrace, 8m x 4m swimming pool, terraces, gardens, under-build of 32m².

For Sale

Ref: S2 - 094

Beautiful 2 Bed 2 Bath Apartment (82m² built 20m² terrace). Spacious lounge/diner, American-style f/f kitchen, master bedroom is en-suite, fabulous communal gardens, pools & padel tennis, underground parking.

Torre del Mar

For Rent

For Rent 550€ per month Puente don Manuel

For Rent

For Rent 600€ per month Algarrobo Pueblo

For Sale 395,000€

R2 - 177

Exceptional 2 Bed 2 Bath Villa (150m² built 500m² plot). Entrance hall, guest toilet, dining area, spacious lounge with wood burner, very large balcony, f/f quality kitchen/diner, utility room, 2 very spacious en-suite beds & dressing area + balcony, 10m x 5m pool, terraces, gardens, great views, parking.

For Sale

Ref: S1 - 018

Delightful 1 Bed 1 Bath Village House beautifully reformed, rewired and replumbed to a very good standard. Entrance hall, guest toilet, living room, American-style f/f new kitchen, double bedroom with large en-suite bathroom & storage.

For Sale 58,000€


Ref: R2 - 120

Lovely 2 Bed 1.5 Bath House (80m² built 171m² plot) built to high standard, comprising lounge/diner, f/f American style kitchen, 2 double beds, 1 bath, guest toilet, totally private courtyard & garden (75m²) plus front terrace, Close to beach, 5 minutes from town centre.

For Sale

Ref: S4 - 076

4 Bed 4 Bath Luxury Villa (200m² built 540m² plot) close to beach. Entrance hall, large w.c./cloakroom, 2 large lounge/dining rooms, conservatory with log fire & incredible sea views, f/f kitchen & 4 large double en-suite bedrooms, office, extensive terraces & gardens, pool, BBQ area & parking. / email: Avda. Andalucia, 135, Torre del Mar Tel: 952 547 554 or 680 210 414

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email



m Fro Ed... the

Editor: keidi - 610 976 284 Email:

Last month, for the first time in my life, I attempted a detox! I didn’t really know what to expect, but I rather fancied the idea of having my insides cleaned out, eliminating any rogue toxins which were causing my liver stress. I combined the detox with a three day meditation, reflection and chill out period, beginning 11/11/11 at which time the universal energy was particularly powerful. I researched many different detox ideas online, finally settling for one entitled ‘the easy detox.’ It involved drinking five vegetable juices a day involving cucumber, celery, carrots, beetroot, lemons, spinach and parsley, plus one organic apple juice for lunch. It all began quite well I thought and having got through day one as planned I actually felt fairly good. Day two however was a different story. Upon waking that morning my tummy was making some curious noises and I craved a bowl of cereal. But I dutifully stuck to the detox and pulled out a load of green veggies from the fridge. Every mealtime became a tougher battle as the empty feeling inside expanded. By now I had a splitting headache too, despite drinking a load of water. Yet I managed to summon the willpower to slog through that day too. I don’t even remember falling asleep that night, which means I probably passed out through lack of energy! On day three the nightmares began. The thought of eating any more cucumbers actually petrified me. However, I’m not one to give up easily so I breakfasted on the usual array of vegetables and even gulped my mid-morning juice. Come lunchtime all my willpower grew wings and flew out the window and I snacked on some Ryvitas topped with tuna mayo…mmmmm, I’d forgotten what real food tasted like…each bite took me closer to heaven! So I failed the detox with just half a day (and one night) to go. But never mind –there’s always next time. In fact that time could come

Sales: kami - 664 210 468 Distribution/Collections: Tony - 664 689 138 Follow us on Twitter @The_Sentinella or @keidi_keating Email:

Deposito Legal Ma-1435-2005 No part of this publication, including pictures may be copied, used or reproduced without our prior written consent. The Sentinella accepts no responsibility for alterations to events listed, claims made by our advertisers or information provided by our contributors. So there!

The Sentinella is eternally dedicated to Colin Checkley, the founder and editor of The Sentinel Magazine. May he rest in peace. (Born; 1960 Died; 2004)


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From The Ed (cont)

Strange News

along fairly soon, after all it’s Christmas at the end of this month and the New Year is a prime time to do a detox…. Isn’t it?!

Deadly secret A Colombian woman kept her dead husband's body hidden in her house for a month in the hope he would resurrect himself.

Wishing everybody out there a Merry and Magical Christmas and a New Year bursting with abundant blessings! Keidi Keating

Editor (of the original little mag)!

Alba Yacue kept the corpse of her spouse, Lucio Chacue, in her home because he had told her that he would "come back to life". So when he died of unknown causes, aged 61, she hid the corpse in their house and waited for him to wake up again. But officials grew suspicious after neighbours wondered where Mr Chacue had gone and alerted soldiers. When investigators arrived at the home, they found the body of the late Chacue in the master bedroom. "What was left of his body a month after his death was wrapped in a sheet," a local newspaper reported. "It was in a state of decomposition and gave off a nauseating odour that Alba Yacue endured in hopes of the possible resurrection of her companion, as he had promised her in life." Test pass A West Lothian woman passed her driving test while in labour - and then drove herself to hospital to give birth.

Fruit & Veg Chart..............................Page 24 Useless Facts...................................Page 40 amazing insects...............................Page 52 Share’oscope....................................Page 71 Funny Pics........................................Page 75 Paparazzi...........................................Page 78 Cabbage Patch.................................Page 79 Film review......................................Page 80 what’s New........................................Page 81 reader’s writes................................Page 93 what’s On.........................................Page 100 information.....................................Page 102 Jokes Page.....................................Page 104 Puzzle Page....................................Page 106 Star Signs.......................................Page 108 The Trader.......................................Page 110

Emma French, 20, from Livingston, had four contractions during the test but managed to carry on and pass. Then she drove herself to St John's Hospital, in Livingston, where she became a mum for the first time. She said: "Everyone was telling me to go to the hospital but I had waited so long for my driving test that I was determined to do it. I didn't dare tell the examiner I was in labour in case he made me cancel the test. The nurses in the hospital were very confused because I was getting congratulations cards for both my baby and my driving test; when I told them they were all in shock.” Miss French woke up at 4am on the morning of her driving test to find her waters had broken, but when the baby didn't arrive she decided to sit her test, which was booked for 8.40am. Miss French's labour lasted another six hours and baby Eva MacFarlane was born at 7.30pm that day. She added: "One good thing about being in labour was it killed any pre-test nerves."

Happy Christmas and a very prosperous New Year!! From Rashid, his family and staff

Menu del Dia - 6.50€

Monday - Friday 12pm - 4pm 3 courses (including vegetarian)

Help yourself Buffet - Sundays 13.00 - 16.00 Adults - 9€ Children under 10 - 5€ Includes various starters, mains, vegetarian dishes, rice and bread

Special Menu Monday to Saturday - 9.50€

Pappadam, Onion Bhajee / Vegetable Pakora / Vegetable Samosa, Prawn Puri & Chicken Tikka Chicken, Lamb, Prawn Vegetable - Vindaloo / Balti / Jalfrezi Tikka Masala / Korma / Dansak / Biryani / Chicken or Lamb Tikka Pilau Rice / Naan / Tea or Coffee

Avda Andalucia, Bloque Jupiter, Pasaje Timon 2, Calle Timon, Torre del Mar

Tel: 952 547 798 or 665 675 053 Open: 12.00 - 16.00 18.00 - 24.00 everyday TAJ Mahal Restaurant

Merry Christmas and a happy New Year!

Sunday Roast of wine â‚Ź 8.50 Bookings recommended

All Day English Breakfasts, Full Menu, Open from 10am till late every day. Scandanavian Special every Tuesday Karaoke every Saturday night


Quiz Night every Thursday from 8:30pm with cash prizes APARIV Charity Quiz last Friday of every month

C/Dr Maranon, Torre del Mar Tel: 952 544 362


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The Best Cup Cakes On The Costa Costa Cupcakes is based on Calle del Mar in Torre del Mar at Costa Baking Co. Sue Taylor opened for business in March this year and has since baked up a Cupcake storm on the Costa. You can now also order and collect from one of our approved suppliers: Croxepan, Calle San Martin, Torre del Mar Celebrarlo con globos, Pasaje Santa Margarita Local 2, Torre del Mar Cafe Bar ayer, Playa de la Puerta Del Mar, Edf Victoria, 1, Almuñecar Panaderia hijos de Cordobilla, Calle Euscebio Garcia, 9, Competa El Basilisco, Salon de Te y Cafe,Nueva Villa de Competa,6, Competa To discuss your festive requirements, please call 645 223 933 or email We are particularly fond of our Christmas selection of designs, but feel free to

add your own twist! Don’t forget your Three Kings and Red cupcakes to use as your good luck charms for your New Year celebrations too….., join Costa Cupcakes on Facebook for all our product and news updates.

TAJ MAHAL Traditional Indian Tandoori Restaurant Torrox Costa EaT aS MUCh aS YOU LikE


9.95 €

Our Special “ALL YOU CAN EAT” Offer is available all over the Christmas and New Year period. Book your table before 25th December to avoid disappointment! Masood and his team wish all their customers, past, present and future, A MERRY CHRISTMAS & HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

New Special Takeaway Menu Open every day - 12.00 - 16.00 / 18.00 - 24.00 Ctra Nacional - 340 (Next to Post Office) Torrox Costa

Tel: 95 253 4972 / 634 051 535

THE HAIR & BEAUTY STUDIO Cruce de Periana, Puente don Manuel (along from Morenos Bar)

Our team of Hairdressers, Marina & Danni and Barber Tony are getting booked up for book early to avoid disappointment. Please telephone or pop in for a FREE CONSULTATION Beauty Treatments Pedicures w Manicures w Collagen Facials w Hopi Ear Candles w Acrylic & Gel Nail Extensions w Teeth Whitening w Eyelash Perming w Aromatherapy Massage w Semi Permanent Makeup w Reiki w Waxing w Self Tan Treatment w Reflexology and Lots More!! December Special Offer - FEELING CHILLY? - Why not treat yourself to a Hot Stone massage or a Holistic Back massage with Heat Pads - 30€

Advanced Cosmetic Procedures & Electrolysis December Special Offer - Got any unwanted blemishes, skin tags, facial thread veins, milia, warts, etc.? We can remove them quickly & easily in time for those Christmas parties. Treatment normally 50€ NOW 40€ IDEAL CHRISTMAS PRESSIE

GIFT VOUCHERS AVAILABLE HERE Treat that special someone or a good friend that enjoys being pampered

THE HAIR & BEAUTY STUDIO Cruce de Periana, Puente don Manuel (along from Morenos Bar)

Qualified Sports & Remedial Therapist. (BSC Hons; RSA) Specialising in soft tissue massage and manipulation inc. treatments for sciatica, back problems, tension headaches, muscle injuries as well as relaxing & lymphatic massage.

Shiatsu Massage For the relief of stiff joints, stress, neck & shoulder discomfort Now available here on Saturdays only.

Thermal Imaging for Breast & Body Body Screening for early detection and Nutritional advice with Janet Van Dam. Non Invasive, Pain Free, Radiation Free & Reliable. Here every Monday by appointment only.

Acrylic and Gel Nail Extensions

Check out our fabulous designs on the hair & beauty facebook page Acrylic colours and Nail Art also available Chiropodist by appointment only

La Cure - Dead Sea Minerals

Now available - Face & Body creams Spend over 30â‚Ź and receive a discount voucher for Lipo by Laser

Lipo by Laser / Oxford Skin Clinics

Lose inches in time for Christmas by targeting adipocyte cells (fat cells), the process offers an effective and safe solution to fat reduction without surgery, the pain or the recovery time. Call us for more information

Call: 951 232 852 Mobile: 693 740 575 Facebook - Hairandbeautystudio, Lake vinuela

TAJ MAHAL - VENTA BAJA Ali, his family & staff would like to thank you for your custom over the last year and wish you all a Merry Christmas & A Happy New Year!!



Monday - Thursday Day & Night (except Monday lunch) Poppadam & Pickles Selection of starters: vegetable samosa or pakora or onion bhaji or Prawn puri or Chicken tikka Main course: chicken, lamb, prawn or vegatable: Korma, Madras, Vindaloo, Balti, Jalfrezy, Rogan Josh, Tikka Masala, Karahi, Biriyani or Chicken or Lamb Tikka Accompaniments: Plain or Pilau rice. Plain, Garlic, Cheese or Onion Nan Bread or Chapati FrEE Pappadam with Mango Chutney & Pickle Tray with all meals

Menu del Dia Mon-Fri 12pm - 4pm 3 courses €5.95 with veg. curry €6.95 with meat/prawn curry

Takeaways available Free Pappadam & pickle with takeaways

Opening hours 12pm - 4pm and 6pm - 12am every day (closed Monday lunch) Puente don Manuel (Chiringuito antonio) Tel: 952 510 886 Mob: 667 934 731


A very warm welcome to you all.  Open every day except Tuesday from 10am till late Don’t forget to come and sample our exciting tapas. Tubo and tapa 1.50€ Offering good food ‘n’ drink ’n’ in good company ‘n’ friendly ambience. For more information or to book a table (highly recommended) Call Leila: 622 105 809 Looking forward to seeing you all!

Everyday - 4.95€ New lunchtime specials Chicken & chips, Bangers & mash, Spaghetti Bolognese, Chicken curry & rice or Pork fillet with chips/mash Other homemade delights include; Chicken and Cheese wraps, with selection of sauces 4.95€. . Spring rolls with sweet chilli dip. Combi platter includes pork fillets, chicken pinchitos, grilled tomatoes & chips 4.95€ Beef casserole Homemade chicken pies Everyday   All day breakfast - 4.95€

THURSDAY NIGHTS  Thai nights! - 12€ Served from 6pm Sample menu; Thai Fish Cakes in sweet chilli sauce or Wonton soup, Thai Green Curry, Pad Thai & Dessert FRIDAY MARKET Come and enjoy a bacon roll and coffee 2.50€ EVERY SUNDAY  Roast chicken, roast pots, veg & gravy EVERYDAY Spit roast chickens. Eat in or take-away from 2pm We are located in Venta Baja, Puente don Manuel. Turn right at the crossroads and you will find us 500m on the right at the entrance to Chiringuito Carlos


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De Cotta De Cotta Law Charity Sponsorship of The Anglican Church Christmas Carol Service in Nerja • Sunday 18th December, 4pm • iglesia de San Miguel (St Michael’s Church) in Plaza andalucía • Charity Collection and Raffle for The Sisters of the Good Samaritan. • Free Festive Refreshments • Featuring music and performances by: The CoraXalia International Choir The Cámara Cantilena Music Group Joe Boyle De Cotta Law is proud to be the 2011 Sponsor of The Anglican Church Christmas Carol Service in Nerja. This annual festive celebration is one of the highlights of the British and Foreign Resident Community’s calendar in Nerja. Performances This year The Reverend Geoff Johnston will be hosting a traditional Carol Service that will also feature performances by The CoraXalia International Choir; The Cámara Cantilena Music Group; and Joe Boyle. CoraXalia International Choir is based in La Viñuela, and was formed

in October 2006 by accomplished and experienced soprano Marisa Bell-Young, its current president. The name derives from “Cor” for coro/choir, “axa” for “Axarquía” and “alia” for “Salia”, the river running through La Viñuela. The Cámara Cantilena Music Group are a wellestablished acapela group based in Nerja, and they specialise in singing medieval church music; whilst Joe Boyle is a seasoned performer and long-term resident of Frigiliana. Charity - The collection will be for Nerja’s The Sisters of the Good Samaritan. refreshments - De Cotta Law will again this year be providing festive refreshments after the concert and holding a fund raffle for The Sisters of the Good Samaritan. DE COTTa’S NEw NErJa OFFiCE De Cotta Law would also like to take this opportunity to confirm that the Nerja Office has relocated to new ground floor premises. From Dec 1st, De Cotta Law in Nerja can be found at: Calle Diputación 11, 29780 Nerja All other contact details remain the same Tel.: +34 952 527 014 Fax: +34 952 523 428 E-mail:

SAXON S.L JcB Digger Hire velez-Malaga Area

Legal Services English Legal Advisor & Experienced Lawyer Specialising In:

PProperty Legalisations PCatastro & Border Corrections PAddition of Swimming Pools or


Extensions to your Title Deed PProperties without Deeds PSale /Purchase Conveyancing PCourt Cases A Quick, Professional & Impartial Service Estimates Given Call for a FREE consultation & get your property papers checked out. Don´t lose a sale due to paperwork inconsistencies

Solutions 4 U, Cómpeta Office Tel: 952 55 38 07 or 660 51 01 34 Email:


662 39 83 72 / 678 23 22 53 email:

“OSTEOPATHY for the whole family”

Clementine Duplan

OSTEOPaTh BSc (hons) Ost (Uk qualified)

Structural, visceral and cranial osteopathy, children and pregnancy

“Gentle and specific treatment of the whole body” Member of the General Osteopathic Council (English register) and the Spanish Osteopathic register

Torre del Mar, Torrox & Malaga areas

622 078 432



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Learning A New Language

By ‘MARICH’ Language School Learning a new language is not as difficult as you might think. Many of you are more familiar with the more traditional methods involving the constant process of patiently putting the puzzle of that language together step by step. Actually, it can be quite simple if you follow the suggested tips below. One cannot over emphasise how important it is to learn a new language and the positive impact it can have on one’s brain and on one’s life in general. The brain is an amazing organ and we still do not know how powerful it can be, once driven by the will and interest to learn something new. With such willpower and drive, the brain can do the unimaginable to make many things possible, including learning a new language. Here are some tips on the best attitude to adopt during the language learning process:

PInstead, learn sentences and not just words. This will actually allow you to speak and communicate in a shorter period of time. PFocus on consciously listening to simple Spanish sentences and do so in a relaxed manner. PConstantly repeat sentences in order to fix or retain them in your long-term memory. PConsider that when speaking a new language, you are making a genuine effort to communicate something that is worthwhile rather than thinking of appearing foolish or stupid when making mistakes. PBe bold! Be communicative! Remember: perfectionism never works! PAccept the new language by getting fully involved in it. You are now bilingual. You can do it! Remember, everything is about your attitude!

PBe open-minded and have a keen interest and willingness always to learn something new.

PSure enough, you will realise that you can speak better than you thought you could!

PDo not try to learn grammar in the beginning.

PGood luck!!


Academia de Idiomas Language School ENGLISH FRENCH GERMAN


SPANISH New Autumn & Winter courses! Free spanish conversational classes every Friday afternoon!

Located in Puente Don Manuel at the Periana Crossing

More INFO: Tel.: 633 780 687 Email:


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It’s Christmassssssss! Christmas One-Liners Why is Christmas just like a day at the office? You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.

Why does Santa have 3 gardens? He likes to ho-ho-ho. How does Santa Claus take photos? With his North Polearoid. What did Adam say on the day before Christmas? It's Christmas, Eve.

As a little girl climbed onto Santa's lap, Santa asked the usual, "And what would you like for Christmas?" The child stared at him open mouthed and horrified for a minute, then gasped, "Didn't you get my Email?"

Why are Christmas trees like people who can't knit? They both drop their needles! What do you call a cat on the beach at Christmas? Sandy Claus!

What is special about the Christmas alphabet? It has NO EL. What happens if you eat the Christmas decorations? You get tinsel-itus!

What do you call a reindeer wearing earmuffs? Anything you want. He can't hear you!


Every Saturday 11am - 2pm Starting 3rd December

“Bar Kiosco de Pacito” in Los Vados on the old Viñuela to Velez road (A-7205) Come on down for the morning and meet “El Meme” the owner serving breakfasts, rolls, tapas & much, much, more!!! A lovely setting in a lovely traditional village

Call: 952 554 514


4€ a pitch

3 A-

24 pitches available on a first come first served basis!!

Bar Kiosco Los Vados To Lake


El Cruce To Velez

Don’t leave it to chance! Get your FREE winter check Free Brake Check

Service with oil & filter from Starter motors & alternators repaired

45€ inc. IVA

(cheaper than recon/new)

Merry Christmas & A Happy New Year!! Book your vehicle in early for Christmas Closed from 24th Dec - 9th Jan

New tyres fitted from


(155/80R 13)

Pro Neumaticos

Happy Holidays! Happy Holidays can manage all or part of your Holiday Lettings for you – we will not tie you up in yearly contracts. We can offer ‘pay as you go’ services at reasonable prices for any aspect of renting your property that you do not have time or cannot do yourself. Our standards are the highest ensuring that your guests will be happy with their choice of holiday accommodation, right from their initial booking enquiry through to their departure if you choose to let us manage it all from start to finish, making you a happy owner! Call Sue & Mark at Happy Holidays on: 952 550 323 / 616 119 007 or email: for more information


F-Gas 2079 Registered

Mark feels like Father Christmas. With prices so low, he feels like he is giving them away!!! Call for our Christmas Offers He also wishes you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Esola Systems

Best Prices Guaranteed Domestic and Commercial Air Conditioning (Heating and Cooling) Installations

Tel: 616 119 007 / 952 550 323


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Christmas Carol Lyrics Kids' interpretations of Christmas Carol lyrics 1) Deck the Halls with Buddy Holly.

8) Olive, the other reindeer. 9) Frosty the Snowman is a ferret elf, I say. 10) Sleep in heavenly peas.

2) We three kings of porridge and tar.

11) In the meadow we can build a snowman then pretend that he is sparse and brown.

3) On the first day of Christmas my tulip gave to me. 4) Later on we'll perspire, as we dream by the fire.

13) Oh, what fun it is to ride with one horse, soap and hay.

5) He's makin' a list, chicken and rice.

14) O come, froggy faithful.

6) Noel, Noel, Barney's the king of Israel.

skunk, I require."

7) With the jelly toast proclaim.

16) Good tidings we bring to you and your kid.

15) You'll tell Carol, "Be a

We would like to wish all our clients and future clients a  HAPPY CHRISTMAS AND A VERY HAPPY NEW YEAR Opening hours for Christmas and the New Year are: 23rd - Open as normal, 24th - Closed, 26th - 30th - Open from 10am - 3pm, 31st - Closed 2nd - 5th Jan - Open from 10am - 3pm, 6th & 7th - Closed Open as normal from the 9th Jan 2012. Closed Saturdays There is also a book exchange in the waiting area


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The Fruit & Veg Chart This awesome chart can be used by everyone. Here’s A - G for you. H - Z next month


Merry C hristma

t Monday Marke

X COSTA CardioDance:

Learn to Salsa, Cha Cha, Swing, Hustle Dance Classes: Also includeS Rumba, Sal Cha and Choreographed Routines Keep Fit Classes with or wITHoUT weights Your Heart, Your Life, Your Choice Almeria TO Estepona Call HuGh GRANT 606 086300

as from Torrox



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a t s o C ToSererpoagxes 26 - 36

t it he abou ad all

ta - r e x Cos Torro CardioDance: Learn to salsa, cha cha, swing and hustle to an aerobic workout. Dance classes also held in all these, plus rumba, sal cha and choreographed routines. 606 086300

For reputable buildings and contents insur-

re! ance, car insurance, private medical insurance, pets insurance, funeral plans and more, contact Lewis insurance Services.

Happy Christmas from Yo Jive. Join us throughout December learning to dance Modern Jive. Beginners are always welcome, you do not need a partner, come alone or bring a friend. The music is modern chart music as well as many of the classics. It's easy, it's fun and it’s a great way to meet new people. Call or email (see advert for details) or become a friend on Facebook under Yo Jive Torrox and keep up to date with what is going on.

Join us at Los amigos in December. Monday’s we have line dancing at 7pm and on Wednesday 14th we have our Christmas quiz with candelit carols at 8pm. Friday nights from 9pm are karaoke with Rockin Robin or Johhny Hollywood. Table top sale on Saturday 3rd at 10.30. Sat. nights we have live music at 9pm and this months line up is 3rd Alan Miles with his Tribute to Neil Diamond and Friends, 10th Bad Eyed Deer (Flip!, Mick and Donny), 17th Grand Christmas Draw and Los Amigos Variety Night. Christmas Eve Andy Time, New Year's Eve, New Year's Eve Party Night. Sun nights from 8.30pm we have jam sessions with Dr. Dave or the Siesta Blues Band. We are closed on Christmas Day.

La Taperia is probably the best and most authentic tapas bar in Torrox. Run by Tanja and Nico and located just behind Lloyds Bank they offer more than 18 tasty tapas to choose from with a daily special. Eat in or takeaway. Tanja is already famous for her Ribs with Mixed Vegetables from the oven. "Menu del Dia" and "Platos del Dia" cooked fresh daily with new daily dishes from only €5,90! Open from 9.30am for breakfast until 4pm (closed Tuesdays). Fri, Sat and Sun evening meal on reservation. Why not visit them and enjoy a unique mediterranean cozy ambience. Book now for Christmas Day or Boxing day evening, we have a great menu for 35€ per person. Call in to find out more. asador Pollo rico means delicious chicken roaster. Located just behind Lloyds Bank, beside the Notary in front of Mercadona.

Takeaway roast chickens and daily cooked fresh food. The quality chickens are delivered daily from the poultry farm in Granada and taste delicious. Our international clientele are convinced of the quality of our chickens. Why don't you call in and try one and choose from one of our homemade sauces (garlic, bbq and hot). Enjoy a 1.2 kilo roast chicken, chips and homemade sauce for only 8.50€. See our advert and call to place your order. Lads & Dads Barber Shop Professional gents stylist and barber with 20 yrs experience. Open Mon - Sat 10am - 2.30pm & 2.30pm 7.30pm Mon - Fri for appointments only. Call: 625 57 21 83

Leal Consultores is a consultancy firm based in Malaga and Torrox Costa. Leal Consultores professionals consist of economists, social graduates and lawyers who's experience and knowledge can help you with tax, accountancy, employment, commercial, legal advice and insurance. Visit us in Torrox Costa next to Lloyds Bank on Urb Costa del Oro, Centro Comerical B, Local 1a. December at Caribe, Christmas Day dinner, this year’s menu is the best we have done yet and only 35€, for those of you having Xmas dinner at home, why not come to our Xmas Eve dinner, complete with music and dancing from the Duo Poster, outrageous value at only 16€, definitely a fun way to start your Christmas celebrations and finally New Years Eve, this year our New Years Eve party is just 40€ complete with party bags and of course the traditional 12 grapes, whilst the fireworks may not match those at the Balcon, it is definitely the best place for the Hokey Cokey and this year we will also be showing New Year from around the world. Details of all these events are on our website and reservations can be made by email, by phone 952 530 831 or by personal visit. Oh and for those of you who appreciate cakes that really are made on the premises, Liliane has added two new cakes, Pineapple and Coconut and an American Cheesecake, delicious and tremendous value 2,50€ with a cup of coffee or tea. Merry Xmas and a Happy New Year to all our customers and Sentinella readers. New to Torrox Costa ace Detection. A mobile car diagnostic service with over 25 years experience, covering over 40 makes of cars. Call Andy on 685 793 311 or email for a reliable friendly service.


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a t s o C ToSererpoagxes 26 - 36 La Pateleta is an International Restaurant and Bar in Avenida de Espana, Torrox Costa with a Danish twist. Run by Brian and Michael who speak great English, they have a large terrace, indoor dining area, live music and can cater for private functions. Become a friend on Facebook find them under "La Pataleta V/Møss og Hjort". La Pateleta will be closed from 24th 27th inclusive but open again on the 28th. New Year will be a great night with a 3 course dinner and all inclusive drinks for only 55€. Bookings being taken now. restaurante El Pino always has plenty going on. We always have great meal offers, 2 for 1 (although not available 19-30th Dec), Sunday Lunches with early bird option (early bird not available on 18th) and fish and chip Fridays & Saturday Steak night, check our advert for further details. Live Music Friday starts on the 2nd with Johnny Hollywood, 16th Gasoline Duo, and 23rd Xmas Draw and music with Geoff Murrell. Our Christmas quiz (with a twist!!) on the 9th with Wendy and Julie. Sunday Live music on 11th December with Geoff Murrell. Saturday 10th we are having a Night of Traditional Christmas Entertainment including: Christmas Carols Hit Sing a Long songs as well as, individual performances of Christmas songs, poems and monologues and Tombola! FREE entrance and FREE Mulled Wine & Mince Pies!! Get your ticket NOW!!! Christmas Eve will be lovely at El Pino with Santa visiting

in his horse drawn carriage giving out sweets and little presents to the children at approx. 6pm followed by Fancy Dress Christmas Eve Party. We shall party the night away on New Year's Eve with our Buffet & Party incl. full plate buffet. Music with the Flying Dolphins & Johnny Hollywood, Party poppers, hooters, fireworks and more! Tickets 15€ (REP's Club Members 10€). Christmas day luncheon is now fully booked. So don’t miss out on any of the parties going at El Pino, get your tickets now. And finally a note from Wendy and Joe, “We would like to thank all our customers, old and new that in these hard economic times that have remained supportive of El Pino and all the events etc. that we have organised. Wishing you all a very Happy Christmas and New Year. There is so much going on at Tabla rock Cafe. Live Music during December starting on Sun 4th with Silver Fox at 4pm, Sat 10th to be confirmed, starts at 10pm, Sun 11th Gasoline 4pm, Sat 17th Luxaka 10pm, Sun 18th Johnny Hollywood, Sat 24th Gasoline 10pm (Christmas Eve free buffet), Sat 31st Dec Talomino 10pm (New Years Eve Christmas Buffet). russells British Store always has a great stock of favourite british products. We have a frozen food section and also stock cleaning products, toiletries and even pet food. Each month we have special offers in store so call in to see our December offers. We are taking orders for Christmas such as gammon joints, Irish topside, beef, port with crackling, boned and rolled turkey breast and whole duck. We have plenty of christmas cards, chocolate selection boxes, crackers and more.

Merry Christmas

Clinica Casa Blanca Clinic for:


THe BOweN TeCHNique

Massage, Lymphatic drainage, Shiatsu, Reiki, Reflexology, ear-Acupunture, Craniosacral Therapy Do you suffer from back problems, spinal misalignment, pain in neck or shoulders, joint discomfort, tightness in muscles, internal ailments, migraines, fibromyalgy or do you just want relaxation from stress? The Bowen Technique is gentle and works on the whole body for inflammation, illness and pain. The treatment is safe and appropriate for everyone, from newborn babies to the frail and elderly.

Forever living products: inc. Minerals and Aloe Vera Products etc. Also home visits Ask about gift vouchers urb. Jardines del Mar, Blq C3, Torrox Costa (near garden Centre, 1km direction Nerja)


Tel: 952 967 628 or 659 374 673



w General Medicine

English Dentist: Dr. Michael Mannish B.D.S. (univ. of London)

Harley St. Cosmetic Dentist of 25 yrs.

w Paediatrics w Physiotherapy, Osteopherapy


648 203 157

Take advantage of our free 2nd opinion

w Acupuncture

before you start your treatment elsewhere

w Aesthetic anti-ageing Medicine without surgery w Special Treatment for Fibromyalgia and Stress -

Competitive prices

Teeth whitening in 1 hour (call for more information)

Implant specialist We Speak English, German & French Centro Internacional, Blq. 86, TORROX COSTA

Tel: 952 53 09 08

Sue & Carsten offer you a warm Christmas welcome

Come and get in the Christmas spirit with our Danish Gløgg Sue's Mince pie & Carsten's Risalamande Join in our Christmas bottle raffle, tickets available NOW !! The 24th December (Christmas Eve) Party Night with Singer/Guitarist BEN The 26th December (Boxing Day) Afternoon FUN QUIZ with Mr. John 'Scrooge' himself !!

See you there!

Open from 11.30am to late 6 days a week (closed Thursdays)

Tel: 952 967 734

Find us on Paseo Maritimo, Torrox Costa At the end of Avda. El Faro, down the steps and we are on the right just behind the “Ruins”

Find us on

Sky Sports

Sands & C

Casa Maria

Jam Night - Mondays


(with hosts “Flip” & “Little Less”)

Happy Hour Mondays - Saturdays - 5.30pm - 7pm Sundays 12pm - 4pm (1€ bottle, 2€ pint San Miguel, 1€ glass of wine) Mondays & Wednesdays - Zumba - 10am Sundays - Karaoke from 7pm with Bjarne Saturday 10th December - Table top sale 10am - 2pm Christmas Day opening hours - 11am -2pm then 6pm - close

Carol & John wish everyone a very Happy Christmas and a Healthy, wealthy New Year!!

Parties & Functions catered for Open 11am - Late 7 days a week Call: 667 954 901 or 664 259 968 Torrox Park (bar on the goat track)

ibs!!! Not just R We specialise in Ribs, Wings, Steaks & Chicken


wVariety of Starters wBeef / Pork / Turkey wVarious Desserts wCoffee whalf bottle of wine p.p. wSitting at 15.00

NEw YEarS EVE  CarVErY wiTh LiVE MUSiC STarT 8pm Call for details for more information Bookings essential Credit Cards taken Torrox Costa - Block 88 (Next to tennis courts & auto 2000) Tel: 95 253 2369 / 696 516 534

Closed Mondays

The leading brand in infrared Heating Heat up your home in a healthy and economical way! Infrared Design Heating System: Pictures, Mirrors, Glass, Blackboards, Columns etc. -New additional product line of frameless white panels: More power for your money.

-All Redwell® heaters have a partial storage heater to keep running times lower.

10% discount with this advert

above: Picture heater abstract

Contact us or visit the exhibition at our shop: Redwell, Dipl.- Ing. Svend Scharler, Avda. El Faro, Bl. 75, bajo 9, Torrox Costa Phone: 952539742, mobile: 606423869, Email:,

Weston Kennels & Cattery Fully Licensed Kennels

C贸MPETA A real home from home for your pets looked after by a very nice bloke

Over 18 years experience Collection Service Long stays our speciality We also have CAS dogs & cats looking for a home

Tel: 951 254 134 660 167 902

Email: Torrox - C贸mpeta road, 100m from Pavo real

MErrY ChriSTMaS aND a haPPY NEw YEar to all our customers & friends from the Country Properties team in Cómpeta and Torrox

Cómpeta Office


Torrox Office ViLLa



rEF. 5148 TOrrOX

PriCE: 349,000€ ViLLa


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rEF. 5174

CLOSE TO ThE ViLLagE, CharMiNg ViLLa, 3 BEDS, 2 BaThS, PriVaTE POOL, iNTEriOr PaTiO, POrCh, SEaViEw, SEMi-FUrNiShED, LaND 3700M2

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ts c a ss F

use are ! y e h g ys t azin alwa ut am s b A

le e s U


1. Elephants Elephants can’t jump are the only animals that can't jump. (They're also the only animals with 4 knees) 2. A cat's urine glows under a blacklight 3. 2,000 pounds of space dust and other space debris fall on the Earth everyday. 4. 99% of the solar system mass is concentrated in the sun. 5. A person from Glasgow is called a Glaswegian. 6. A quarter of Russia is covered by forest. 7. A sizable oak tree, during the typical growing season, gives off 28,000 gallons of moisture. 8. Although modern images of India often show poverty and lack of development, India was the richest country on earth until the time of British invasion in the early 17th Century. 9. American astronauts must be under 6 feet.

Angel Falls

10. Angel Falls in Venezuela is the world's highest waterfall, at 3,212 feet (979m).

11. Antarctica has no native population. 12. Approximately 1/3 of the Earth's land surface is desert. 13. At latitude 60 degrees south you can sail all the way around the world. 14. At the nearest point, Russia and America are less than 4km apart. 15. Australia is the richest source of mineral sands in the world. 16. Because of a USA - Russia large orbital eccentricity, Pluto was closer to the sun than Neptune between January 1979 and March 1999. 17. Because of heavy traffic congestion, Julius Caesar banned all wheeled vehicles from Rome during daylight hours. 18. Because of the salt content of the Dead Sea, it is difficult to dive below its surface.

The Dead Sea

19. Alligators cannot move backwards. 20. An estimated 80% of animals on Earth have six legs. 21. A cubic mile of fog is made up of less than a gallon of water. 22. A full moon always rises at sunset.

Christmas at Cazadores De La Luna Hotel Colmenar

Come and enjoy a Traditional Christmas at Cazadores De La Luna. Log Fires, Christmas Tree and a warm and friendly welcome. Entertainment for all the family including Mini Disco with prizes and a special visit from Father Christmas!! Christmas Menu 35â‚Ź per head - FREE bottle of wine per couple.

Christmas package also available!!

Why not spend Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and Boxing Day here with us. Full Board plus bottle of wine per couple with evening meal. Evening entertainment for all the family - 450â‚Ź per couple Children's prices on application.

For reservations please call 952 730 112 Or visit our website at: or email us: WE LOOK FORWARD TO GREETING YOU!


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My Mature Friends Two elderly women were eating breakfast in a restaurant one morning. Ethel noticed something funny about Mabel's ear and she said, “Mabel, do you know you've got a suppository in your left ear?” Mabel answered, “I have a suppository in my ear?” She pulled it out and stared at it. Then she said, “Ethel, I'm glad you saw this thing. Now I think I know where to find my hearing aid.” ---------------------------------------------An elderly couple were on a cruise and it was really stormy. They were standing on the back of the boat watching the storm, when a wave came up and washed the old man overboard. They searched for days and couldn't find him, so the captain sent the old woman back to shore with the promise that he would notify her as soon as they found something. Three weeks went by and finally the old woman got a fax from the boat. It read: “Ma'am, sorry to inform you, we found your husband dead at the bottom of the ocean. We hauled him up to the deck and attached to his butt was an oyster and in it was a pearl worth 50,000€.

Please advise.” The old woman faxed back: “Send me the pearl and re-bait the trap.” ------------------------------------------------------------A funeral service was being held for a woman who had just passed away. At the end of the service, the pallbearers were carrying the casket out when they accidentally bumped into a wall, jarring the casket. They heard a faint moan. They opened the casket and found that the woman was actually alive! She lived for ten more years, and then died. Once again, a ceremony was held, and at the end of it, the pallbearers were again carrying out the casket. As they carried the casket towards the door, the husband cried out, “Watch that wall!” ------------------------------------------------------------The Senility Prayer Grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.

11 years experience on the Costa

w w w w w w

Maintenance Technical Service Installations Repairs Diagnostics Consultations

Computerised analysis of water

Instant test for bacteria the only one on the Coast Results in 20 mins

Español - English - Francais - Nederlands

600 811 355

innovative Non invasive Laser Lipo & Non Laser Tattoo removal Available at The Hair & Beauty Studio, Puente Don Manuel A network of leading beauty & skincare specialists throughout Europe


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Wedding Wheels Andalucia Close your eyes and think of a wedding car. What do you see? Chances are, ivory ribbons and a flying lady will spring to mind. The flying lady figurine, formally known as “The Spirit of Ecstasy”, has adorned most Rolls-Royce motor cars for a 100 years, since 1911. The world's most instantly recognised mascot, it was described by its creator as “a graceful goddess.” It is a fitting romantic mascot for a smooth and elegant journey into your new life, particularly poignant for the best and most evocative wedding car in the world! The Rolls Royce is one of the most iconic luxury cars ever built and the Silver Shadow, with its timeless design, first rolled out in 1965. Launched at the Paris Motor Show that year, it remains one of the best loved classic models. With an unequivocal pedigree, the Silver Shadow was designed and created to be “the best motor car in the world.” It is just such a vehicle that WEDDING WHEELS ANDALUCIA offers to grace the best day of your life - a resplendent golden, chauffeur-driven, RollsRoyce Silver Shadow II - to transport the stars of YOUR show safely and sedately to and from

your chosen places of ceremony and celebration. When the double "R" badge takes a promenade or turns a corner, everyone notices and wishes you well, making your day even more memorable and special. Meanwhile, you are relaxing in a stylish, air-conditioned, iconic wedding car, enjoying affordable luxury with comfortable cream leather seating, French polished walnut trim, stereo music if you choose and luxurious lambswool carpeting as the world drifts by. WEDDING WHEELS ANDALUCIA operates along the Costa Del Sol from Gibraltar in the west to Almunecar in the east and also inland in Andalucia. The car of your dreams can be booked directly, or through your wedding planner. See main advert below

Bar/Restaurant “The Garden”

Now open everyday 5pm - close (Sundays from 1pm) Kitchen open until midnight every night

Happy hour 5.30pm - 7pm (a third off all drinks) Homemade oven baked pizzas available every night NEW!! Mixed grill for two - 22€ American size salads Special Platters - Selection of different pates, cheeses, ham, smoked fish, chorizo & morcilla Burgers & Hot Dogs

Sunday Lunch Special Offer!!

Main course including a drink


Choose from the following meats; Lamb, Chicken breast, 1/4 chicken, Beef or Pork Selection of homemade ! Soon! g n desserts i m Co hts!!! g i n y Comed ows!!! Sh Dance eARLY BiRD SPeCiAL!

Monday - Saturday 6pm - 8pm 6 choices each of Starters, Mains & desserts. Have a Starter & Main or Main & Dessert inc. a glass of wine, beer or soft drink


For reservations & information: 676 380 328

Special menus available for groups & private functions. Organisation of stag or hen nights, etc

To Puente don Manuel

English Dental Technician Over 20 years experience Fully Qualified Denture Repairs Adjustments / Duplications Based in Torrox Pueblo We can visit if needed Call Graham for confidential advice on any denture problem on: 952 539 219 / 622 719 640

BOOTHILL Tattoo Studio

w We have thousands of designs or bring your own w Professional w Sterile w Clean w Personal service

DENTiST Dr Bakri

*Dental Cosmetics *Implants Crowns & Bridges Algarrobo Costa Tel: 952 55 05 21

Torrox Costa Tel: 952 53 20 12

Emergencies: 678 974 892

MAnn & VAn

UK Moves and Back Local Removals

20â‚Ź per hour Call Barry: 628 236 661 or 672 973 513


“BARGAINS GALORE” 1st Sunday of every month

Available for Removals & Clearances

9.30am - 1.30pm

20€ per hour

Call: 657 399 995 / 669 600 419

Call: 6000 47435

Jewellery Traders


Restaurant El Pantano (On the A356 towards Colmenar, overlooking the lake)

we BuY & SeLL SeCONDHAND: Gold, Silver, Jewellery, Coins, Jewellery repair GOOD RATeS PAiD FOR SCRAP & iTeMS!!

Tel: 635 497 033 email: or come and see us at the following markets:

w w w w

Reliable Driver with Clean Van

Tuesdays - Trapiche 10am - 2pm Wednesdays - Hotel Saydo, Mollina 10am - 2pm Thursdays (1st in the month) - Iznaja 10am - 2pm Sundays - La Trocha (Coin) 10am - 2pm (near the lift)

References available

Have your headlights gone opaque or yellow?

This is now a fail on the ITV test so get them professionally refinished Don't forget we still service car air con systems to keep you cool Call Mike now on:

951 321446 or 616 264067

Michael/Maria Reeve Tlfn: (+34) 669 899 065

Mobile: 606 510 479 We have chicken coops for rent or sale

Fencing, gates, pergolas, car ports, decking, borders,  garden swings chairs, garden tables and chairs,  trellis in all sizes, plant pots and lots, lots more....

Email: Long term Car Rental pcm Group B 375€ Group C 425€ Group D 475€ Zafira 7 seater 600€ 4x4 700€

Airport pick-up and delivery Special offer - Hyundai Accent family  sized car 100€ p/w (min 4 week hire)  Free delivery along the coast  from Nerja - Airport

Janet Van Dam Tel: 618 989 125

(by appointment only) Clinics at: El Morche, Competa, Puente Don Manuel









From Nicky, Kim and all our staff Open 10am til late. Kitchen open til 9pm (til 5pm on Sundays)


12pm - 2.30pm


Boxing Day

12pm - 3.00pm

Mon - Sat 6pm - 7pm

then Lunch [FULLY booked] serving 'Brunch' only

New Year's Eve 10am til Next Year! Disco & FrEE Buffet

New Year´s Day Shut

Roast Turkey with all the trimmings every Sunday in December €7.95

Beer - €1.50 / pint Spirit & mixer - €2.00 Bar Atila Christmas Party

Sat 17th Dec 7pm til Late in aid of Aston Viñuela CF

"Stuck for a gift idea? ... we now sell Bar Atila Vouchers!"

For information or bookings please call:

663 393 987

C/Buena Vista, Puente don Manuel

Medical Centre & Surgery SHOwROOM at LAKe ViÑueLA

In order to give clients individual attention please phone for an appointment before visiting. We are situated at KM29 (on right) off A356 1km past Camping & Pantano Restaurant. We are signposted from there. From bouncy chairs to buggies, stairgates to sterilisers. Everything you need for when little ones come to visit. PHONe DAwN ON: 627 931 360 weBSiTe: eMAiL:

CHRISTMAS MARKET SUNDAY 11th DECEMBER 10.30am - 2.30pm In the hall of ‘El Trapiche’ Bar/Restaurant C/tra. Triana - Benamargosa, km0.1, Trapiche, Velez-Malaga, Gifts for everyone: handmade cards, crafts, decorations, jewellery, stocking fillers etc., plus homemade breads, jams, chutneys, pickles, sauces and festive sweets/treats. Also stalls selling clothes, toys, UK Christmas foods and popular Spanish wines. PLUS Raffle prizes to be won in aid of ‘HELP FOR HEROES’

CLiNiCaS Verdemar

Dr. Hassan Farhat (Reg. 29/08/25255) *General Surgeon General Practioner. *Skin Diseases *Soft Laser Treatment *Varicose Veins (Microfoam) *Lower Back Pain Laser *Neuropathy *Breast Surgery *Mesotherapy Consultations in English & Spanish Appointments call: 616 528 521 C/ Verdemar 2c Edf. Toboso 1 Torre del Mar wE arE hErE


We welcome you to inspect, select & collect from our

Clinicas Verdemar


Sugar Factory

Tenencia de Alcaldia Avda. Andalucia Police Station

un s a F ear!! t n e i Y cl our py New l l a p Ha h ing W is s and a a is tm Chr


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g n i z a Am cts Inse

ng thi no y aren s d a the s o rde , yet ecie skills a reg ests g sp nal , and ly n ral ing pinati satio ame ly im . e en noy asc ani o sh ing zing g f g a r e a n a n o s t i r o r e r s t s e e m ama y ts d An re th the m. The lea ome uinel mo e of anet world verc gen ... on is pl put to o les is ore.. th uld bility stac it m woeir a le ob ut a b th ssib nd o po t’s fi Le The insect with the largest brain in proportion to its size is the ant.

The queen ant has wings. Wood ant workers live seven to ten years. There are 60 species of ants in North America. There are 35,000 kinds of ants in the world. Ants don't sleep. When the only queen ant dies, so does the entire colony, because no new workers are born. The study of ants is called Myrmecology.

The queen feeds her eggs with her own saliva. Some ants sleep seven hours a day. Ants have two stomachs -- one for themselves and one to feed others.



Glass of Sparkling wine with Cream of courgette with cheese, serrano ham aperitif of the house & scallion ~~~~~ ~~~~~ Smoked cod in papillote, clams & white wine Homemade sorbet of lemon with cava ~~~~~ ~~~~~ Turkey medallions served with puff pastry Grilled salmon covered with dill cream filled with vegetables & fine herb sauce with & shrimps mushrooms ~~~~~ ~~~~~ Confit of lamb shoulder with fresh creamy Chocolate brownie with vanilla ice cream vegetables & rioja and honey sauce 22.50€ per person ~~~~~ New year dessert, cava & grapes ~~~~~ USIC AFTER WITH LIVE M T!!! New year gift GH NI MID 39€ per person / 49€ including wine (Red wine - Ribera del Duero crianza email: White wine - Blume Rueda) Fantastic menu of the day 8.45€

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email

Amazing Insects (Continued) Ants can lift an object up to 50 times their bodyweight and carry it over their heads. They don't do this with their feet, but with their mouths. A queen leaf-cutter ant mates only once - just before establishing a new colony. She can then keep the sperm viable for up to 15 years and produce as many as 300 million offspring.

For every human in the world there are one million ants. The brain of an ant has about 250,000 brain cells.


Poppy Appeal A special thank you...

ARKWRIGHTS The British Store & More

Your No. 1 Stop Shop Open 7 days a week

A special mention must go to the Arkwrights team and their customers for managing to raise a massive 343.57â‚Ź. They acheived this simply by asking the customers who wanted a Sur newspaper, to donate towards the Poppy Appeal. On behalf of the appeal we thank you.

To discuss your individual needs, please speak your local advisor richard Mills. Tel: +34 607 845 603 Email:

an original portrait

of your loved ones / family or pets by

h ea th er g a il h ar m a n b. a .h on s Looking for a unique gift? A special present for Christmas

Tel: 952 115 366 / 628 306 371 Commissions now being taken for Christmas!!

Cafe - Bar

“Serving a selection of new dishes and of course, Fresh Fish! Attractive prices”

Special Offer! Delicious Lobster 500gr. - only 18€ C/Marquita 3, Paseo Puerta del Mar, Almuñecar Tel: 958 630 245 / 629 882 696 You can find us near the old Post Office, in front of the entrance to the underground car park. Closed Wednesdays


Exclusive agents for allianz insurance C010924887168h Car - Home - Commercial - Community Health - Accidents - Life - Pensions Boat - Hunting - Fishing avda. antonio Tore Tore 1 Bajo 29740 Torre del Mar Tel & Fax: 952 965 332 Mob: 609 558 567 Email:

Our dental team specialise in complex cases and full-mouth restorations using dental implants with a particular emphasis on cosmetics

Spanish dentist registered with the General Dental Council UK (Registration No. 84912)

Fluent English and French spoken.



Mon to Fri: 9am - 1pm 4pm - 8pm C/ Camino de Málaga nº 9 1º 29700 Vélez-Málaga (near Vélez-Málaga town hall)

Tel: 952 50 65 25


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The Word Queen Self Publishing Your Book Authors have been self publishing their own books successfully for over one hundred years. Take a look at this list of a few of the wellknown authors who all began their amazing writing careers by self publishing their own book. Oscar Wilde Rudyard Kipling George Bernard Shaw Mark Twain Beatrix Potter Deepak Chopra Virginia Woolf John Grisham Christopher Paolini (Eragon) So if they were able to do it there’s nothing to stop you from doing the same! But remember, when self publishing your book you must carry out all the work that a traditional publisher would have done. This includes printing, shipping, distribution and paperwork. Here are a few tips to help you along your self publishing journey:

Save up to 50% compared to conventional retaining walls

*Make sure your book is proofread thoroughly. It’s worth the money to hire a professional editor. *Add a great description to your book. *Spend time learning how to promote your book effectively. *Book-buying customers look at three things: The front cover, rear cover and table of contents. Make these sing. *List your books on Make sure the text is precise and grammatically flawless. *Start a website and link it to the Amazon bookstore. Sell your books through your website. *Market your book through press releases, articles, blogs, websites, etc. *Get your book into book fairs like BookExpo America and the London Book Fair. Wishing you the best of luck if you decide that self publishing your book is for you!

Dry-stone Gabion Walls Do it yourself or we supply and erect. Up to 50% saving against conventionally built stone walls

Do it yourself kits supplied with full instructions and advice or we can supply and erect using our own fully qualified staff. All products delivered direct from the manufacturer in the UK No planning required No architects drawings No long waits for building licences Suitable for landslips, retaining wall solutions & ornate landscaping All Gabion baskets are guaranteed for over 50 years against corrosion Gabions act as natural drainage so no water diversions are necessary No sand or cement needed

For a FREE no obligation quote & site survey call:

952 516 218 / 660 792 282 Or v is i t our new webs i te /

Vanessa´s Traditional Sunday Roast to share

Last sitting 5pm Chicken, Pork or Beef served with traditional trimmings Always very popular so book early! 3 courses from 20€ per couple

The Lemon Tree “el Limonero” Lounge Bar te ebsi s w w e r ne treerio. u o on k at Loo .thelem www

3rd December - Chef Demo - Join In and Vote as The Chef Brian cooks off against Graham 10th December - Book your table for a Fantastic Indian Supper! 24th Xmas Eve - Start the Xmas Revelry with us Live Music With ‘Mr Sister’ - Food available New Year’s Eve - Gourmet Supper at The Lemon Tree beginning with a superb Flamenco Show then join us in bringing in the New Year 25th January - Book early for ‘Burns Night’ Great Fun, Great Food And Good Scottish Whiskey ***Last few spaces left for Xmas Day*** Winter opening hours Closed - Mon, Tues & Wed Thurs & Fri from 6pm Saturday & Sunday from 1pm Private functions catered for

Calle Vienteocho de Febrero Riogordo

(Turn right and right again at the Painted Star on the road)

Call: 620 3535 94

Find us on


Want to see the latest in TV Technology?


Stunning High Definition TV - For FRee? No Card, No Subscription, No Contract! Also available: Spanish Digital TV, FreeSat + HD, Sky Plus HD, other Language Systems Full range of Digital HD TV Sets, delivered and installed for free. installations, Dishes, Alignments, Cards, Multi-Room etc. Appointments available in all areas 7 days a week Call us early for same day service!! For a FREE - No Obligation - Home Demonstration Call: 657 484 853 Or email: ALL wORK FuLLY GuARANTeeD


The British Store & More Your No. 1 Stop Shop Open 7 days a week STar BUY! 25% OFF BOXED ChOCOLaTES

1 kg Parsnips, Brussels, Swede & Bramley Apples 2 kg Leg of NZ Lamb 300g Fresh Cranberries 4 kg Horseshoe Fresh Gammon 5 GOLD Foil Confetti 6 Mince Pies ON THe 700ml Clotted Cream 12 DAYS OF  8 kg Fresh Turkey CHRiSTMAS  907g Christmas Pudding ARKwRiGHTS  10 metres Christmas Paper SOLD TO Me!! 11 Pigs in Blankets 12 Christmas Crackers XMaS OPENiNg hOUrS Mon 19th to fri 23rd - 9am to 8pm Sat 24th - 8am to 12 noon Xmas day closed Boxing day 10am - 2pm 27th to 30th - 10am - 6pm New Years Eve 8am 12 noon


Opening hours: Monday - Saturday 9am - 7.30pm Sunday 10am - 4 pm



Some Offers in Store Now:- Cherries in Liqueur 2.20€; Turkish Delight 2.10€; Plus Other Boxed Chocolates From 1.60€; 6 Mince Pies 1.10€; 450g Mustard Piccalilli & Sweet Pickle 1.20€; 568ml Vinegar 1.30€; Ross 710g Pickled Onions 1.20€; 670g Beetroot 2.40€; 285g Salad Cream 1€; Lime & Orange Curd 1.30€; 300g Lyons Cream Crackers 1.35€; 125g Carrs water Biscuits 1.30€; 900g Jacobs Cheese Biscuits 7.75€; Heinz & Branston Baked Beans 4 For 3€; 360g Branston Pickle 2.40€; Pork Hock (enough For 4 People) 3.30€; Plus A Large Selection Of Frozen Foods On Offer in December. Our Offers List is, As Always, Too Vast To Mention



The Parcel Force to be reckoned with

Sending or Collecting items from UK or Europe

952 519 780

we accept all major credit cards Find us on the web:

ChE Ck  OU DiS T OUr CO UNT   S!


To advertise call 664 210 468

Psychic Medium Energy Healer

Clients often ask me about what happens when Spirit comes through to me. One sunny day, two ladies came to see me. I began to tune into their past. I felt a doctor, who was part of the family, and his two children. Then I tuned into another family member, and received information that the solicitor they were using was dishonest! This all made sense to the ladies, and I also helped them to release some painful issues. Forty-five minutes passed in a flash, but then everything changed. I tuned into their father, and told the two ladies that he was now in the room. They felt him too, and all of us had tears in our eyes. I told them many things, then he suddenly left. Then came the bombshell. “Mark,” one of the ladies said. “Everything you told us was absolutely correct, except for the things you said about our father.” The lady explained that their father had left before they were born, and the only man they’d known was their uncle, who lived nearby. As she talked, Spirit came through again and I saw a picture of their father in my mind. He wore an army uniform and a cap. He held a whip in his hand, like that used by horse riders. Then I opened my eyes and said “You have his picture in your pocket.” They looked shocked, but when they showed their picture to me, I knew it was not the man I had seen. “This is not your father,” I said. I turned to the other lady. “It’s you who has the photo of your father.” She delved into her bag, took out a photo and put it on the table. Here was the man in army uniform. “This man is in the room with us now and he tells me he is your father,” I said. “But that is our uncle,” one lady said. Then I gave them his message, saying that he had been in love with their mother, and they had had a brief affair. When her husband -- his brother -- found out, he had left. The 'uncle' told them how much he had always loved them, and had wanted to tell them the truth. This was probably the most powerful spiritual moment I’ve ever experienced. As the ladies left my studio, they were happy that all the pieces of their puzzle had now been found. So, if you’re ever thinking about a loved one in spirit, stop for a moment, close your eyes to remember their warmth and love, and listen to them. They could be trying to communicate with you.

Because your worth it!!

Chauffeured driven Mustang convertible available for weddings, proms, excursions, private functions or just to spoil yourself

We wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and a Happy and Prosperous New Year!! Call: 678 896 460 627 722 829 or 662 378 911

“CHRiSTMAS RAFFLe” A LuXuRY HAMPeR Tickets 2.00€ and available from the office

pino electricidad 34.95€


TOwEL raiL Max 90W Easy to install Dry & warm towels 450x600x95




CEraMiC gaS hEaTEr 4,000W 3 levels Bottle Gas Easy to move

SPECiaL OFFEr ELECTriC FirE rEaL EFFECT  Max 2,000W, Elegant



haLOgEN hEaTEr Instant heat 3 settings 70o oscillation Max 1,200W


SPECiaL OFFEr PaTiO hEaTEr Butane gas 2.25 metres high

Custudio Puga, 9-a TOrrE DEL Mar (Behind the Taxi rank)

Tel: 95 254 03 92 Fax: 95 254 32 93 happy Christmas & a Prosperous New Year

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email


Man, Woman or Yuppie! Christmas Controversies CONTrOVErSY Should the tree be real or fake? YUPPiE Live tree, planted after use MaLE Fake tree, discarded after use FEMaLE Grow tree in house, adorned with fruits rEaLiTY Fake tree stays up until May, adorned with furballs CONTrOVErSY Should tree lights twinkle or stay constant? YUPPiE Each bulb blinks to its own random rhythm MaLE Bulbs flash logo of football team FEMaLE Elegant flickering candles rEaLiTY Tree bursts into flames, burns house down CONTrOVErSY Should tree be topped with an angel or a star? YUPPiE Gender-neutral angel; no submissive female stereotype MaLE Blonde angel, kneeling, in a wet T-shirt FEMaLE Authentic angel explains true meaning of Christmas rEaLiTY Hell's Angel steals the tree and the gifts

CONTrOVErSY Do you fling or hang tinsel? YUPPiE Empower each strand with self-determining skills MaLE Six large clumps of tinsel on front of tree FEMaLE Each icicle hangs like strand of delicate artwork rEaLiTY More icicles on floor than on tree CONTrOVErSY Do you open gifts on Christmas Eve or morning? YUPPiE Gifts opened on posted, individual schedules so all enjoy surprise MaLE Anytime, just so it doesn't interfere with football FEMaLE Anytime the entire family is present rEaLiTY Doesn't matter, everyone's drunk anyway CONTrOVErSY Ham or Turkey for Christmas Dinner? YUPPiE Baked Tofu Balls stuffed with wheat germ MaLE Anything, as long as there's plenty of it - and beer FEMaLE A meal the entire family plans and prepares rEaLiTY Chinese carryout or McDonald's

WINTER DEALS: Solar Panels: Shuco - 150lt - 1,900€ or 200lt - 2,150€ or 300lt - 2,670€ heat Sun - 160lt - 1,750€ or 300lt - 2,500€

Heat Pumps: Power First - 20m3 - 40m3 - 1,750€

we offer garden design and general maintenance including:

Automatic Irrigation Systems, Drainage, Pest Control Garden and Pool Maintenance Pergolas, Printed Concrete

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email

Scouse Industry Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken wall at 10 Downing Street; one from London, another from Bristol and the third, Liverpool. They go with a government official to examine the wall. The London contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil. 'Well' he says 'I figure the job will run about £900: £400 for materials, £400 for my crew and £100 profit for me.' The Bristol contractor also does some measuring and figuring, and then says: 'I can do this job for £700: £300 for materials, £300 for my crew and £100 profit for me.' The Liverpool contractor doesn't measure or figure but leans over to the Government official and whispers: "£2,700." The official, incredulous, says: 'You didn't even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?' The Liverpool contractor whispers back: '£1000 for me, £1000 for you, and we hire the guy from Bristol to fix the wall.' 'Done!' replies the government official.


$$$ Share’oscope $$$ Still battling through these very uncertain times, Mr. Stockmarket is working tirelessly to find companies making money for you. This months money bought 18180 Weatherly International @ 5.50p Weatherly is a AIM listed copper mining exploration and development company. Last months share, Xtract Energy was bought at 1.70p now 2.01p. Great growth I think you’ll agree. PLEASE NOTE The investments we make are fictitious. Profits are not guaranteed, so please only invest what you can afford to lose!


And that, my friends, is how it all works!

Turn your terrace or balcony into all round living space? - The answer


B O a r D i N g C aT T E rY Canillas de aceituno

We offer safe, tranquil accomodation for your cat. Our pens are safe and secure but with all the comforts of home, making it very cosy. Only 20 mins from Torre del Mar, inland towards Vinuela, Campo Cats is a short 2 min drive from a main tarmac road which gives very good access. We welcome inspection visits where we can discuss your cat’s personal needs. We only accept cats that are fully vaccinated Also, we can provide a collection & delivery service. For further details, call Linda on: 665 510 735 Campo Cats Cattery

Product Benefits: w w w w w w w w

Other Products

Doesn’t spoil views Folds neatly away Elimates dust and dirt No need to bring furniture inside Warmer winter homes Increases value to property Adds security Reduces noise

Replacement Windows/Doors Glass cut to size Shower Screens Repairs to all Glass Products Conservatories Solar Film

Timber Decking Supplied and fitted to your design or supply only

call Glass curtains Direct on: 626 458 954 email: Agents for The Glass Curtains Co.


Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

Canillas de Aceituno natural mountain spring water which is said to prevent illness!

Canillas de Aceituno is situated 17 kilometres from the capital of the Axarquía, Vélez-Málaga, in the north east of the region at an altitude of 650 metres above sea level. There are three ways of reaching the village, either from Arenas and then turning left before Archez, Algarrobo then turn left for Archez and right for Salares and carry on or the way I find easiest is to turn right off the road leading from VélezMálaga to Viñuela (A-356) at the Renault Lorry Park, then first left and first right signposted Canillas de Aceituno, its just a 10 kilometre road up to the village. As you drive up you can see Canillas nestled amongst the slopes of the Sierra de Tejeda and the great Maroma (the roof of Malaga) with its peak at 2,065 metres! The landscape here is absolutely spectacular in all weather. On a bright, clear sunny day you can see both the pantano at Viñuela and the sea sparkling below you but on a dark cloudy day with mist settling on the mountain tops the scenery becomes mysterious and the hills seem to whisper the secrets of their traumatic past when both Phoenicians and Romans passed through this way long before the Arabic era, the Moorish rebellion and Franco. A question so many people ask about these mountain pueblos is why, when there were no roads, did people build in such high, remote spots? There are many reasons but probably the main one being water! Here in this area for example, people come from far and wide for the healing powers of the


The name Canillas de Aceituno is said to have its origins from the Arabic azzeitun, meaning oil, but then on further investigation I discovered the name comes from the Latin Canillae, meaning zone of cane plantations! Plus the Arab word Azeytuni for woven and dyed silks. Under Christian rule the silk trade thrived here and the cloth was exported from Granada. Rather a shame that the offices for controlling this trade, The House of Tithes (left), which today is uninhabited, became in the 20th century a tavern and almond ware-house! The silk trade seemingly more romantic and prosperous! Today you can easily miss the village itself as there is now a bypass below which leads directly to the outdoor, municipal swimming pool, but if you continue into the village and find a parking space you can wander through the narrow streets and discover its charm. The impressive 16th century Church of Nuestra Señora del Rosario, a Gothic-Mudejar style building, looms up amidst the houses and the Town Hall in the Plaza de la Constitución stands proudly next to the Casa de los Diezmos (House of Tithes) which although now slightly crumbling shows some fine Mudéjar architecture with its white tower and double blind arches. Luckily this building survived the earthquake which on Christmas day in 1884 destroyed many houses and killed 6 people. There are many bars and restaurants serving delicious local cuisine and in springtime there is a chance to eat your way through thousands of kilos of black pudding during the Dia de la Morcilla! By Sally Harrision Axarquia Properties

Property Of The Month AS2592 Arroyo Coche, Casabermeya 175,000€ 175,000€

Charming 200m2 3 bedroom, 3 bathroom country home with orchards, beautiful gardens and a 6,103m2 plot. Although the property is on mains water it also has 2 wells, one for drinking and one for irrigation. The south facing terrace is perfect for sunbathing and has plenty of shaded seating areas, 5x4m dip pool, pool shower, summer kitchen containing BBQ and sink, alfresco dining area and a lovely garden with mountain views. Downstairs there is a covered terrace overlooking the courtyard and a beautiful garden. The property has many fruit trees including Cherries, Pears, Apples, Lemons, Limes, Oranges, Pomegranates, Figs, Olives, Almonds and Quince so quite a selection! For sale due to owner ill health. Must be seen to be appreciated!

PrOPErTY SPECiaLiSTS SiNCE 2001 iF YOU haVE PrOPErTY TO SELL CaLL SaLLY ON 626 038 851 or 952 436 781


AS2321           Comares 187,000€

AS2577          495,000€   Elviria, Marbella 

100m2 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom, rustic country house with pool and good road access

260m2 5 bedroom, 3 bathroom villa with pool, 2 garages, sea views, good road access

AS2592    Arroyo Coche      AS2595                Iznate 395,000€ 175,000€  Christmas bargain! 200m2 3 bed, 3 bath house with dip pool and 6,103m2 plot

138m2 4 bedroom, 2 bathroom house with pool, garage and 1 bedroom guest apartment

Sally harrison Owner / agent

AS2360               Nerja 149,000€ Restaurant/Bar in Burriana Beach. 277m2 front line to beach. Great business opportunity!

AS2598           Comares 525,000€ 200m2 4 bedroom, 3 bathroom country house with pool, 80 fruit trees on 10,000m2 plot

Merry Christmas & a happy New Year!!


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We have now been Screening the Costas and Inland for 9 years We manufacture all types of screens, any shape, any colour Magnetic - Aluminium Sliders Roller Screens - American Swing Doors and Patio/Balcony Enclosures ALUMINIUM - U.P.V.C WINDOWS, DOORS & CONSERVATORIES w w w

70mm U.P.V.C Internally Glazed 28mm Double Glazed Unit


Tilt and Turn System


Sliding Sash System


Fully Fitted by our own Craftsmen

Tel/Fax: 952 565 225 / 690 296 952

Email: Or visit our website:

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email


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Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

s d e i r nt Worl u o C he Of T

, list -Z ous A rld er wo rosp e p h t ... nd and ies routable ountr r ou t s n c 7 in moserica 3 er he Am mb of t Nu one Latin is

Population - 17.1 million Language - Spanish Located - South America Capital - Santiago Currency - Peso religion - Christian Main Exports - Copper Literacy rate - 95% Life Expectancy - 79 years g.D.P. Per Capita - 16,000 US$ Total area - 756,096 sq km National Sport - Football

Famous for - The 1960 Valdivia Earthquake or Great Chilean Earthquake as it is better known, still holds the record for the strongest earthquake ever measured. infamous for - The 17-year rule of General Augusto Pinochet, whose 1973 coup was one of the bloodiest in 20th-century Latin America and whose dictatorship left more than 3,000 people dead and missing. interesting Facts - Chile's coastline stretches 2,700 miles long, running from the Atacama, the world's most arid desert in the north, through forests, valleys, mountains, lakes, glacier fields, the Tierra del Fuego and the Antarctic Circle in the south. Chile is never more than 110 miles wide east to west. There are over 2,000 volcanoes in Chile, out of which 50 are active volcanoes. Chile lays claim over 1,250,000 square kilometers of Antarctica, although the United States of America does not recognise this claim.

the friday market Chiringuito Carlos

Puente Don Manuel

Every Friday 9.30am - 1.30pm Market dates for December: Friday 2nd December Friday 9th December Friday 16th December Friday 23rd December Friday 30th December wishing all our customers a very


Come along and see what we have on offer !! More info? Call Karen on 674 526 968 – only 3₏ a pitch

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email

77 105

Random Jokes :) The Fence... The husband leans over and asks his wife, 'Do you remember the first time we had sex together over fifty years ago? We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you.' ‘Yes’, she says, 'I remember it well.' ‘OK,' he says, 'How about taking a stroll around there again and we can do it for old time's sake?' ‘Oh Jim, you old devil, that sounds like a crazy, but good idea!' A police officer sitting in the next booth heard their conversation and, having a chuckle to himself, he thinks to himself, I've got to see these two old-timers having sex against a fence. I'll just keep an eye on them so there's no trouble. So he follows them. The elderly couple walks haltingly along, leaning on each other for support aided by walking sticks. Finally, they get to the back of the tavern and make their way to the fence. The old lady

lifts her skirt and the old man drops his trousers. As she leans against the fence, the old man moves in.. Then suddenly they erupt into the most furious sex that the policeman has ever seen. This goes on for about ten minutes while both are making loud noises and moaning and screaming. Finally, they both collapse, panting on the ground. The policeman is amazed. He thinks he has learned something about life and old age that he didn't know.. After about half an hour of lying on the ground recovering, the old couple struggle to their feet and put their clothes back on.. The policeman, is still watching and thinks to himself, this is truly amazing, I've got to ask them what their secret is. So, as the couple passes, he says to them,' Excuse me, but that was something else. You must've had a fantastic sex life together. Is there some sort of secret to this?' Shaking, the old man is barely able to reply, 'Fifty years ago that wasn't an electric fence.'

the friday market Stall of the month

Shelley`s Deli can be found at Puente don Manuel every Friday. we offer a great range of home cooked; meat pies – steak and kidney, beef in red wine sauce and lots more huge variety of delicious cakes cold meats, fresh and sliced ready to eat a great range of cheeses

The Christmas range at Shelley`s Deli includes home baked;

luxury mince pies delicious Christmas puddings a wonderful selection of Christmas Cakes (to order)

Come and find us in the bar at Chiringuito Carlos we would love to see you !!!!!!!


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the of ra F at le ma rt Sin a at be ok is Al o l c we ran nth ld... F o r is m o Th leb w ce

ra a p Pa Profile

Name: Francis Albert Sinatra Birthday: 12th December 1915

first national break and he sang with the band until recording his first solo records in 1942. He won an Oscar for best supporting actor in From Here To Eternity in 1954. A passionate civil rights campaigner, Frank played a major role in the de-segregation of Nevada hotels and casinos in the 1960s. In 1967, Frank’s duet with daughter Nancy, "Somethin' Stupid", topped the Billboard pop and UK singles charts. Frank ‘retired’ in 1971 – and made a comeback two years later, performing in a TV special and album, both entitled “Ol' Blue Eyes Is Back.” He was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom by Ronald Reagan in 1985, and received the Congressional Gold Medal in 1997.

age: Died aged 82 Sign: Sagittarius Birthplace: Hoboken, New Jersey Marital Status: Married four times, to Nancy Barbato, Ava Gardner, Mia Farrow and Barbara Marx Children: 3, Nancy, Frank Jnr and Tina Occupation: Singer/Actor Claim to fame: He had the biggest-selling album artist of the Fifties and the secondbiggest of the Sixties One of the most enduring music legends of this century was the late, great Frank Sinatra. Love him or hate him, this iconic singer, actor and legendary hell-raiser made a mark on popular history which will never be forgotten and his infinitely fascinating life still continues to surprise. Frank attended High School for only 47 days – he was expelled for ‘rowdy conduct’. His mother ran an illegal abortion business from the family home in Hoboken, New Jersey. He began singing for tips at the age of eight, standing on top of the bar at a local nightclub in Hoboken, and got his first break with a local band, The Three Flashes, in 1935. A meeting with Tommy Dorsey in 1939 gave him his

Frank won 11 Grammy Awards, including the Grammy Trustees Award, Grammy Legend Award and the Grammy Lifetime Achievement Award. He never learned to read music. In 1990, he celebrated his 75th birthday with a national tour, and in 1995, to mark his 80th birthday, the Empire State Building glowed blue. Sinatra's final words, spoken after his wife Barbara encouraged him to "fight" as attempts were made to stabilise him, were: "I'm losing." The official cause of death was listed as complications from dementia, heart and kidney disease and bladder cancer. He was 82. The next day, the lights on Las Vegas strip were dimmed for 10 minutes in his honour. The U.S. Postal Service issued a 42-cent postage stamp in honour of Frank on May 13, 2008, and Congress passed a resolution a week later designating May 13 as Frank Sinatra Day. The epitaph on his tombstone is the title of the last song that he ever sang in public: “The Best Is Yet To Come.”

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email

The Cabbage Patch The veggies continue to sprout on our allotment in Mezquitilla. Now that the growing is underway we only have to go to water every other day, and as we take it in turns that means one visit every four days! We’ve had a nice lot of cucumbers already, which despite their earlier apparent infestation turned out rather impressive. We've also had curly red lettuces...and the herbs are thriving so much that it’s hard to keep up with them. There are only so many herbs we can eat in a day! Our tomato plants are looking good too. There are lots of green ones almost ‘REDdy’ to pick! Recently we spied a toad leaping out of the tomato plants which was quite a surprise to say the least. Spiders and beetles are to be expected, but not toads! Personally I’m looking forward to when the beetroots are fully grown as last year I had such fun boiling them up and then eating them.

Unusual Building Advert We felt compelled to place this advert as a recommendation following a series of building/reformation works carried out for us to an exceptional standard and quality, and such competitive prices, by two highly skilled, honest Spanish workmen, who are able to carry out total refurbishments down to simple tiling, with fixed prices and full guarantees. For any further information in English or German call Terry and Uta on:

685 372 609


Sat.Co What is an LNB?

Sat. Co

Call: 657 484 853 email:

LNB stands for low noise block. An LNB’s primary purpose is as a frequency-down converter. By doing this, the signal can then be carried by wire coaxial cable to the satellite receiver. The transmission medium for the very high TV signals received from space are carried by metal pipe called a waveguide. The diameter of this pipe is arranged to be a certain diameter according to the band of frequency used, so transfers the energy with minimal losses. All the data information is carried by this new, much more manageable frequency. Why do I lose some channels in bad weather? The dish is parabolic in shape, and this is very important to ensure adequate reception, particularly when it rains. The problem with rain is that it alters the surface reflective properties of the dish. As globules of water run down the dish, its light focus properties change and so cause reception problems. Ah, I hear you say, why not use an umbrella to keep the rain off the dish? The problem is, the dish still needs to see the sky and the umbrella masks this -- and as you know, the wind tends to blow in the rain from all directions. Another popular widely held belief is that if you cut up a yoghurt carton and fashion it to fit over the LNB, it reduces the rain effects. (The legend goes that it needs to be Lidls peach flavour! No! Wrong!) To ensure near-perfect reception in bad weather and all other times, it is critical the dish is professionally aligned using a digital data noise error meter. Article submitted by Sat.Co 657 484 853


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Film iew R ev

: tin Tin orn f s o nic ure he U t n ft ve Ad cret o e Th Se e Th

From Steven Moffat, Edgar Wright and Joe Cornish comes the muchanticipated The Adventures of Tintin: The Secret of the Unicorn. Based on three of the best selling comic-books by HergÊ, directed by Steven Spielberg, produced by Peter Jackson, and with the vocals of Jamie Bell, Andy Serkis, and Daniel Craig, this film couldn’t possibly go wrong! And after three years of waiting, Tintin has gone straight in as the UK's number one film. When teenage journalist Tintin (Jamie Bell) buys a model of the legendary ship The Unicorn from a street market, it attracts some un-

expected attention from a sinister Ivan Sakharine (Daniel Craig). When Tintin returns home to discover it has been stolen, he follows his instincts to get it back, only to discover that Sakharine it using it to uncover the ship's mysterious secrets. He follows Sakharine around the world with the help of his dog Snowy and the drunken Captain Haddock (Andy Serkis), to reveal the secrets that The Unicorn kept within and to stop Sakharine from getting them first. This is a beautifully animated film, retaining the charm of the comics. Andy Serkis as Captain Haddock delivers some brilliant one-liners as well as hilarious visual gags. Ivan Sakharine, voiced by Daniel Craig is the perfectly sour baddie. Overall, The Adventures of Tintin: The Secret of the Unicorn is fab family fun! Star Rating - ****/*****


On Of go fer ing s!! !



w Doors w Windows w Sun Blinds w Mosquito Nets w Shower Doors w Blinds w Shutters El Cruce de Periana, Edf. Alzabel Bajo No. 3, Puente don Manuel, Alcaucin

Mobile: 608 241 429


To advertise call 664 210 468 or email


What’s New? New in the Axarquia this month.... If you are looking for that something different for a gift or even just for yourself, then why not pay a visit to the farmer’s market at Trapiche on Tuesdays and find Time to reflect. Hand painted mirrors and CDs would make a really special gift. You can view their designs on their website See advert on page 44 Wedding Wheels Andalucia is your affordable luxury for your wedding or special event. A golden Rolls Royce Silver Shadow ll will transport you to your chosen destination. Call 650 193 777 or email See advert on page 44 The Cazadores de la Luna Hotel in Colmenar will be holding a traditional Christmas. With log fires and a warm, friendly welcome the hotel is under new ownwership and really is a pearl of Axarquia. Special packages are available, so why not treat yourself to

that special Christmas. For reservations call 952 730 112 or visit their website See advert on page 41 There’s a new market for you to browse around. It’s on every Saturday morning at Los Vados, which is set on the old road from Velez Malaga to Vinuela and is the next village past Trapiche going north, at Bar Kiosco de Pacito. For further information call 952 554 514 or see advert on page 18 El 7o Cielo is a brand new Gourmet/Fondue restaurant in Venta Alta (Alcaucin) for fun self cooking with a variety of delicious meats. With Belgian hot chocolate fondues it’s a must for that special evening and a unique cooking experience and has now opened it’s doors with a special menu for 14.95€. Call 952 033 101 or 649 661 184. See advert on page 61

Brand new laptops at MEga Bargain Prices English with windows 7 and guarantees From Netbooks to 17” Laptops and Desktops Bush TDV 552 Mini Digital Camcorder, 8x Digital zoom, 2.4” TFT LCD screen, memory card SD and SDHC


Sony Cybershot w530 Camera 14 MP, 8x Digital zoom, 2.7 inch LCD Screen


hP g56 15.6” Laptop 2GB RAM, 500GB Hard Drive, WIFI, Camera, Windows 7


AMD Phenom II 6 core X6, 4GB memory, 500GB HDrive, 10 USB Ports, HDMI Windows 7

aCEr M3400 Blu-ray Desktop Tower


Visit the online shop for a full range of models - or email for further information and a brochure.

ONLINE SHOP: WWW.EBAY.ES search in TIENDAS for MEGABYTE You can also find us at the Farmers Market in Trapiche on Tuesdays Email: w Telephone: 677 843 174 / 663 583 427



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La Vaqueria, Benamargosa

Questions You Just Can’t Answer

La Vaqueria is a gift shop, craft shop, studio and café. A family run business owned by artist Su Derrick who specialises in decorative painting, many of her pieces being available to buy in the shop. You may watch her at work in the studio or join in the Thursday classes if you feel like joining in.

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard when he lives in the jungle without a razor?

The hospitality here is second to none with all visitors being made to feel welcome and cherished. Fresh cakes are baked daily and a snack/lunch menu offers reasonably priced home made food. There is an extensive take away menu of ready meals, pies, pasties and curries. Each month a themed event is planned, focusing on great food but also encouraging people to enjoy an evening that is just that little bit different! In the shop you can find all of your crafting materials along with a lovely selection of inexpensive Moroccan gifts and accesories and an original range of hand made jewellery. Su is usually on hand to help you with any of your crafting enquiries and after over 20 years in Spain she can usually point you in the right direction even if she does not stock your more specific requirements. See main advert on page 96

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat? Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough? Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets? Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet? Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'? What is the speed of darkness? Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up every two hours? If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be? If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

Bar Triana Benamargosa Road, Triana

16th Dec - Fish and Chips


Hot buffet and entertainment with Katie the ‘English Rose’ Telephone 636 081 290 Merry Christmas To Everyone!!

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The Rambo Granny of Melbourne, Australia Gun-toting granny Ava Estelle, 81, was so ticked-off when two thugs raped her 18year-old granddaughter that she tracked the unsuspecting ex-cons down... And shot off their testicles. "The old lady spent a week hunting those men down and, when she found them, she took revenge on them in her own special way," said Melbourne police investigator Evan Delp. Then she took a taxi to the nearest police station, laid the gun on the sergeant's desk and told him as calm as could be: "Those bastards will never rape anybody again, by God." Cops say convicted rapist and robber Davis Furth, 33, lost both his penis and his testicles when outraged Ava opened fire with a 9-mm pistol in the hotel room where he and former prison cell mate Stanley Thomas, 29, were holed up.

"When I saw the look on my Debbie's face that night in the hospital, I decided I was going to go out and get those b******** myself 'cause I figured the Law would go easy on them," recalled the retired library worker. "And I wasn't scared of them, either - because I've got me a gun and I've been shootin' all my life. And I wasn't dumb enough to turn it in when the law changed about owning one." So, using a police artist's sketch of the suspects and Debbie's description of the sickos, tough-as-nails Ava spent seven days prowling the wino-infested neighbourhood where the crime took place till she spotted the ill-fated rapists entering their flophouse hotel. "I knew it was them the minute I saw 'em, but I shot a picture of 'em anyway and took it back to Debbie and she said sure as hell, it was them," the oldster recalled...

The wrinkled avenger also blew Thomas' testicles to kingdom come, but doctors managed to save his mangled penis, police said. "The one guy, Thomas, didn't lose his manhood, but the doctor I talked to said he won't be using it the way he used to," Detective Delp told reporters. "Both men are still in pretty bad shape, but I think they're just happy to be alive after what they've been through." The Rambo Granny swung into action August 21 after her granddaughter Debbie was carjacked and raped in broad daylight by two knife-wielding creeps in a section of town bordering on skid row.

"So I went back to that hotel and found their room and knocked on the door, and the minute the big one opened the door, I shot 'em right square between the legs, right where it would really hurt 'em most, you know. Then I went in and shot the other one as he backed up pleading to me to spare him. Then I went down to the police station and turned myself in." Now, baffled lawmen are trying to figure out exactly how to deal with the vigilante granny.. "What she did was wrong, and she broke the law, but it is difficult to throw an 81-year-old woman in prison," Det. Delp said, "especially when 3 million people in the city want to nominate her for Mayor." Super Gran!

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Nerja is renowned for its friendly, efficient local businesses, caring charities and all-round community spirit. It makes sense to support the best of the best, so check these out! If your car needs repairing, or you want to have it spray painted, visit Jonathan at artucolor for the best price and service. Artucolour is a general mechanics workshop offering car body repairs and body painting.

rafters rastro – New 2 You Shop. We buy and sell your unwanted household items. We sell a huge variety of goods which are changing every day. Normally we have in stock; a wide range of furniture, lamps, vases, ornaments, general bric a brac, books and good quality second-hand clothes. Contact Alan or Wendy. Visit ink and Chips on C/Perez. They have all that you need for your PC, such as ink cartridges and peripherals as well as laptop and printer sales. They also offer technical service 365 days a year. Dentadanes Dental Clinic offer top-quality Danish dental care at Spanish prices; a successful concept they have used since they were established in 1991. Open Monday - Friday 10am - 5pm. They speak English, Danish / Scandinavian, German, Spanish and Italian. Come and see Glenn and Carlos at the Big garage. With more than 40 years experience as mechanics, they speak English and Spanish and specialise in Land Rovers and 4 x 4s. They can also give your car a full service. They use genuine Bearmach Land Rover parts and accessories, and they're easy to find. As you head down from the motorway, turn right at the new Lidl exit, keep


Happy N

ew Yea r

right and you’ll see them straight in front of you. Open all day Monday - Friday, from 9am to 5pm. Olas Sports Lounge Bar will reopen on the 15th of Dec after the staffs well earned holidays & a bit of refurb work in the bar. That evening we are up against Buddies Bar boyz in the Nerja pool league to get us going with a bit of banter and competition, an audience is welcome and our buffet will cater for it! Our Xmas Olas charity Quiz Sat 17th, compere Mr John Boy Holmes will use our new music system to help him get us in the Xmas spirit, we will have a raffle of Christmas proportion and our famous 1/2 time buffet. We hope to make a tally of all the charity money raised this year to show what your support has raised, so come and support, it’s fun to be involved. Xmas Lunch and evening buffet is with Nerja’s famous duo the Flying Dolphins on Xmas day which is nearly full. 15th evening buffet with the Dolphins please contact the bar for details. We may hold an impromture race night on Boxing Day evening after the footy, with money going to our chosen charities Help for Heroes, Cudeca and the Nerja Donkey Sanctuary. New Years Eve we will be having a disco with all the glitter into the night with as many New Years to bring in as we can last year we did 6 through different time zones and people from around the world in the bar that night the Dj kapt Crap is great getting every one involved and the music will be great as always. We will as usual post all the football and other sporting events on the board outside the bar and on facebook, so all it leaves is a big thank you to all of our customers over this year, have a lovely Christmas and be lucky in the New Year, we look forward to seeing you, all the best Dean, Jill and all the team At OLAS. Locked yourself out of your house or having lock problems? Call the 24 hour emergency locksmith, a fully-qualified UK C&G tradesman. Or, simply call to book an appointment.



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Recipe Of The Month Red Wine Risotto This rich, red wine-infused risotto is served as a first course or side dish all over Spain and Italy. The type of wine used varies according to region, but any dry red wine that's good enough to drink can be used in place of the ones mentioned. Serves 8 - ingredients 4 1/2 cups reduced-sodium beef broth 2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil 1 medium onion, finely chopped 2 cloves garlic, minced 1 1/2 cups “risotto” rice 1/4 teaspoon salt 1 3/4 cups dry red wine, such as Barbera, Barbaresco or Pinot Noir 2 teaspoons tomato paste 1 cup finely shredded Parmesan cheese Freshly ground pepper, to taste Preparation 1. Place broth in a medium saucepan; bring to a simmer over medium-high heat. Reduce the heat so the broth remains steaming, but is not simmering. 2. Heat oil in a heavy pan over medium-low heat. Add onion and cook, stirring occasionally, for 5 minutes. Add garlic and cook, stirring, until the onion is very soft and translucent, about 2 minutes. Add rice and salt and stir to coat. 3. Stir 1/2 cup of the hot broth and a generous splash of wine into the rice; reduce heat to a gentle simmer and cook, stirring constantly, until the liquid has been absorbed. Add more broth, 1/2 cup at a time along with some wine, stirring after each addition until most of the liquid has been absorbed. After about 10 minutes, stir in tomato paste. Continue to cook, adding broth and wine and stirring after each addition until most of the liquid is absorbed; the risotto is done when you’ve used all the broth and wine and the rice is creamy and just tender, 20 to 30 minutes more. 4. Remove the risotto from the heat; stir in 3/4 cup cheese and pepper. Serve sprinkled with the remaining 1/4 cup cheese.


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Thoughts For The Month Gentle thoughts for today Birds of a feather flock together... and then s*** on your car.

Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know 'why' I look this way. I've travelled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.

A penny saved is... a frickin government oversight.

When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to your youth, think of Detention.

The older you get... the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.

You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is... to buy a replacement He who hesitates is... probably right. Did you ever notice: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are XL.' The sole purpose of a child's middle name is... so he can tell when he's really in trouble. Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young. Ah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.

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The Lemon Tree What was all the talk about a new chef in The Lemon Tree Riogordo? Someone was cooking up a storm, and I wanted to find out all about it. On entering the restaurant, we were greeted by Vanessa and shown to our table. We immediately noticed a rather large ‘Specials Board’. On it was a very diverse array of dishes, from Thai cuisine to toad in the hole, which I must say was very tempting as I had hadn’t had this for many years. Apart from the specials, there was also a menu with a good variety of food from light bites to full mains. Firstly, the wine had to be chosen and there was a good selection, none of which were more than 10€ a bottle. A full bodied Spanish crianza was in order and at just 9€ – Superb! My wife had a starter of garlic mushrooms which, like all the food, was well presented. It was well infused with the garlic, too. I chose the gambas pil pil which were lovely: oily and spicy, with a great kick from the large succulent prawns.

For mains, we had chicken breast in a creamy mushroom sauce served with Dauphinoise potatoes. I had never had these before, but they were delicious. The chicken was juicy, tender and flavoursome, and was the perfect dish for my wife who is quite fussy. I had the Thai chicken green curry, which had so many different flavours in there with a good bang from the chillies. Served with rice worked up with spring onions, the dish was absolutely scrummy. We got to meet the chef when he came out to ask if we were enjoying our food, and I got the opportunity to ask him his goals and plans for the place. He told us that he wants to keep the variety going on the board, and eventually do away with the menu, just working from the specials. He seemed very passionate when he was talking, and certainly there aren’t many establishments which can serve such a diverse menu from an ever-changing specials board. Time for desserts, and as we had decided to have one between us – being quite full up! – we were delighted to see Chocolate fondue to share – great. When it arrived at the table there was a big bowl of melted chocolate, surrounded by mango slices, banana, apple wedges and marshmallows. With fondue forks in hand, we both made absolute pigs of ourselves. It was sooooo yummy! The Lemon Tree is a lovely place to come to eat. You are made to feel relaxed, there’s no stuffiness and the staff are very friendly. From their fantastic Sunday roasts for sharing, to the exciting new chef and his great enthusiasm, the place is a ‘must visit’ this winter for a thoroughly delightful experience. See advert on page 58


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BEM idiomas I write this every year but, “Can you believe Christmas is just around the corner, again?” Every year I say to myself, “Next year I will try extra hard to learn Spanish.” Normally, this starts off well and then fizzles out by February! I certainly haven’t achieved my goal of learning Spanish before my now-three year old. Although I know more vocabulary than she does, she manages to speak it really fast and sounds so Spanish too. I am still slow, and am sure that no matter how hard I try, I will always sound English speaking Spanish. This isn’t a huge problem, but it would be nice one day just to be able to mingle in with the Spanish and not stand out like a sore thumb! However, saying all that I feel like this year I have achieved loads. It really is beginning to have an impact on my life here in Spain. Being able to have a good old ‘chin wag’ in Spanish with some of the mums at the school is certainly an achievement for me.

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Maybe you are thinking that 2012 will be the year for you to take the step to learn Spanish too? Well if so, now is the time to visit BEM in Velez Malaga. Viviane, the owner, is now busily preparing all the classes for next year. She is also preparing new classes too, on demand. So if you could only attend on a certain day or want a particular class, then pop along between 10am - 1pm and from 4pm - 8pm (Fridays only from 4pm - 6pm) and Viviane will gladly discuss accommodating your requests. Viviane and all her team would like to wish all students past, present and future a VErY MErrY ChriSTMaS aND a haPPY aND PrOSPErOUS NEw YEar.

The Sentinella team would like to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and a Healthy & Wealthy New Year!!

From Keidi, Kami, Tony & Michelle xxxx


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Mind, Body & Spirit Staving off those winter colds & flu’s We’re at that time of the year when the colder weather brings increased risk of getting colds and “flu’s, and doctor’s surgery’s are advertising flu jabs. For any of us who have unpleasant memories of catching a flu with its aches & pains and high temperature then the vaccination may be very tempting. However, as readers of this column will know, I am no fan of inoculation in general, and that applies to the flu jab as well. At least this year- so far anyway- we are just dealing with ordinary common flu without the added scare of bird or swine flu. Although media publicity campaigns urging people to get the jab emphasise the serious – even lethalhazards posed by flu, these are greatly exaggerated unless you are already dealing with some serious health issues. On the other hand, a significant number of people who receive the jab suffer unpleasant side-effects- sometimes as bad or worse than the flu itself. Germs & bugs are part of our human ecology and despite costly programmes to eradicate certain viruses and bacteria, they will remain so. It has been well documented that when we are under stress, our immune systems are compromised and we are more likely to get ill. Catching a cold or a flu is nature’s way of telling us we are overstressed and need rest and care. Suppressing this warning signal with preventative vaccination is like putting a brick on the valve of a pressure cooker: it stops steam escaping, but may cause the cooker to explode! In other words if we disable our relatively gentle early warning system of getting a cold

or flu, we risk a more serious breakdown in our system down the line. Chronic susceptibility to colds & flus and other illnesses suggest that a major review of our lifestyle may be necessary. A happy body is a healthy body and maintaining a healthy lifestyle, harmonious relationships and a positive outlook and attitude are the best prescription for staying free of those annoying winter bugs. If you do want to give yourself extra “insurance”, there are homeopathic nosodes available which can give your immune system a helping hand without any unpleasant or dangerous side-effects. And if you do start to feel under the weather, as if some bug is trying to attack your defences, there are several excellent natural anti-biotic and anti-viral agents you can take to stop it in its tracks. Herbal oils such as wild oregano or wild thyme are extremely effective, as is citricidal extract, a preparation made from the seeds of grapefruit. If all else fails, and you go down with a cold- or worse, a flu- then I suggest you accept it as Nature’s way of telling you that you need to replenish your batteries. Rather than reaching for the medicine cabinet and all those designer pharmaceutical products which claim to fight flu’s and colds (but actually just mildly suppress the systems, take to the bed or couch, eat healthy, drink plenty of liquids, apply TLC and enjoy the rest! Please refer to my website at or see his advert below:

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Readers Writes Local Nerja Police Clueless? Careless? Or just corrupt? Having lived in Spain for more than 10 years, I can hear you saying, “You should have known better!” I recently had the misfortune to visit the centre of Nerja to deliver my computer for service and repairs. On the basis I was delivering, I parked nearby in a designated loading/unloading bay. The process took around 14 minutes, so you can understand my total surprise to find my Toyota cabriolet had vanished on my return. I was advised by a local shopkeeper the local police had taken it. By the time I reached the police station, I had not calmed down. How could they tow me away? I put a sign in Spanish, stating where I was delivering. On arrival at the police station, I gave my details to a policewoman and proceeded to explain that I had, in fact, been delivering. She completely ignored my protests, delivered in Spanish, and passed me a torn

back of an envelope with the amount I must pay to get my car back. 76€ fine, 40€ for the tow truck, plus I would be charged a further 8€ per day for each day I left it. Did I understand? Yes! But I felt she didn’t, I had been delivering! She was now clearly feeling the pressure. Yes, she knew what I was saying but I did not have a truck. A what? Yes it must be a truck for delivering! By now I was really angry, as this was clearly a scam. After another 10 minutes of protests, and this time a very dramatic long slow shrug of the shoulders, it became apparent she was hell bent on having my money. Defeated, I asked her to clarify the fine. Again, I was shown the tatty piece of paper. She repeated it all to me, so I headed home some 15km away on the bus, to collect some cash. Armed with 120€ cash I headed back to Nerja on the bus. The fine was 116€, and I now had 130€ in cash. I marched purposefully into the police station and straight to the desk. “I’ve come to collect my car you stole,” I said, deliberately in English. ‘She’ was not there and ‘he’ didn’t want to understand. So I explained in Spanish I had brought him some money so I could get my car back. He produced a printed piece of paper stating I owed 140€. Now I completely lost it. I demanded to see the woman from before and her piece of paper, but she had gone home and nobody could contact her. After 20 minutes of heated arguing, it was clear only 140€ would get my car back. This time, before I left, I demanded a copy of the fine. Lesson learned. They then tried not to give me a receipt for the 40€ tow truck fee, but I stood my ground and was eventually given a handwritten one. Car keys returned, they then kept me waiting 10 minutes at the electric exit gates. I am reliably informed that the mayor, the town hall and the retailers of Nerja are desperately trying to attract tourist and shoppers to Nerja…REALLY? Signed Thomas a McHugh Tinkerboy. Never going to Nerja again.

The Sentinella Tel: 664 210 468 Business Services a5 Flyers single sided from 90€ a5 Flyers double sided from 120€ Business Cards single sided from 30€ Business Cards double sided from 45€

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Do You. Care ? On behalf of “Country Cousins” agency, Jennie and Barry would like to thank all existing “Cousins” for their dedication, caring, patience and hard work over the past year.

Merry ChristMas



happy new year to you all. Country Cousins

look forward to Meeting new potential



please call Jennie or Barry for more information on: 625 807 504 or 952 115 305 (evenings)

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y r a i D

s e e t a D r Th hat´s oanrea? W ur o Fo in y

Every Monday Bar Atila, Puente don Manuel, Bingo 8.00pm Call: 663 393 987 Every Tuesday Country Farmers Market be tween 10am and 1.30pm. Los Jardines del Trapiche Call: Anita 627 877 164 Every Tuesday Bar Atila, Puente don Manuel, Quiz 8.30pm. 682 502 870 Every Tuesday Bar Triana Ctr. Bemamargosa, Triana. Quiz night 8.30pm. 618 373 316 Every Tuesday La Vaqueria Farmers Lunch. Set menu for just 5€. Reservations 952 517 273 (See main add below) Every Thursday Evening Bar Viva, Torre del Mar, Quiz night from 8.30pm with cash prizes. APARIV Charity Quiz last Friday of every month. Call 952 544 362

Every Thursday La Vaqueria Art Class. Informal and fun with professional tuition. 11am 1pm. Tel 952517273 (See main add below) Every Friday Chiringuito Carlos Market, 10am - 1.30pm Puente don Manuel. Every Friday La Vaqueria Ladies Dinner. From 7pm enjoy a two course vegetarian meal with great company and lively chat! Reservations 952517273 (See main add below) Heather Gail Harmen’s drawing and painting classes. Puente don Manuel every Mon Torre del Mar every Thurs and Lake Viñuela every Fri. Call 952 115 366 / 628 306 371 for details. Yo Jive Modern Jive Dance Classes have a great new venue in Torrox Costa. Every Tuesday 8.30pm. Modern Jive is easy, fun and a great way of meeting new people. |You dont need a partner come by yourself or bring a friend. Beginners always welcome. Join us Tuesday nights at El Ancla de Cirilo, Calle de Peñoncillo, Torrox Costa on the N-340 between Nerja and Torrox Costa. Paintings for sale by Margaret Riordan Taberna del Chorto T. Pueblo. Avda. de Competa, up hill just past tourist info office on right.

Country Market Los Jardines del Trapiche EVERY TUESDAY 9.30 - 1.30 For an extremely organised & fun day out, join us here at our indoor / outdoor market. Lots of varied stalls to browse around and a beautiful seating area for coffees, teas, hotdogs and bacon butties, etc. available at the outside bar Call Anita 627877164 or Chrissie 617811030 for more information. (Junction 272 onto the A356, Vélez Málaga, turn off at El Cruce towards Benamagosa and we are just before the private airport)

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Dates For The Diary (Continued) CardioDance: Learn to Salsa, Cha Cha, Swing, Hustle. Dance Classes: Also includes Rumba, Sal Cha & Choreographed Routines Keep Fit Classes with or without weights.Your Heart, Your Life, Your Choice. Almeria to Estepona. Hugh Grant 606086300 The "El Valle Asociacion" Based around the Lake Vinuela & surrounding areas. Meets on the first Tuesday of the month at 7.30pm at the Camping Bar on the side of Lake Vinuela (A356). The club organises events,trips and social functions. For further details and timings check the web site. Colmenar District Social Club meet on Wednesdays at the Arco de Sol in Colmenar from 12.30, all are welcome. We have quizzes quest speakers and regular trips and events. Contact Marjorie on 951 163 071 Nerja History Group meets on the first Friday of each month at the Cultural Centre, Calle Granada, Nerja at 11.30. For more information, contact Jill Christian-Smith on: 952 538 526 664 760 405 Indoor Christmas Market, Sunday 11th December 10.30am - 2.30pm in the hall of ‘El Trapiche’ restaurant (ctra. Triana/Benamargosa, km 0.1), Trapiche, Velez Malaga. Stalls include Christmas decorations, arts, cards, crafts, clothes, jewellery, stocking fillers, wine, cheeses, tins of chocolates, mince pies, etc. Lots of raffle prizes in aid of “help for heroes” Acoustic Roots New Years Eve: Alberdini Restaurante, CompetaTel: 952 516294. Dancing for the Children International Dance Circle Join us for a very special Christmas Dinner and Dance on Saturday December 17th at El Trapiche Restaurant, 7.30pm. All your favourites, Latin American, Ballroom, Pasodoble, Bochata, and Disco. Christmas fun, and lots of surprises. All raffle profit proceeds to the Malaga Childrens Orphanage. Tickets 12€. Choice of menu, Roast Beef or Salmon. For reservations please call in English 952 510 096 In German 952 965 514 CoraXalia International Choir Christmas Programme 10th 8pm The Church of Ntra, Sra del Carmen, Caleta, 11th 7.30pm The Church of Ntra Sra del Rosario, Alcaucín, 17th 8pm Church of San Andrés, Torre del Mar, 18th 4pm Church of San Miguel, Nerja, [service of lessons and carols] Tuesday December 13th The Smiff’s Book & Card Store Lecture Christmas at Covent Garden lecture starts at 6pm in the Cultural Centre

(Casa Cultura), Calle Granada, NERJA. With Christmas Dinner afterwards at Restaurant Jacky €27 inclusive Tel 952 533 373 to book. There is no FHT Axarquia Therapist Support Group meeting during Dec but our meeting in Jan will be a talk by Christiane Baumgartner on "A Natural Alternative to Hormone Replacement". This will be a morning meeting and further details will be published later. We have already started preparations for a Christmas greetings to all this month from Jenny and Jean and we look forward to meeting up in the coming months. FHT - the Federation of Holistic Therapists - celebrate 50 years in 2012, so no doubt we will find some way to celebrate. Mother & Toddler Group at Torre Montessori Nursery in C/Laureano Casquero s/n Torre del Mar on Thursdays from 10.30 - 12.30pm tel: 633 637 774 CAS Events December 6th Charity Quiz in aid of CAS at the M T Bar, Punta Lara, Nerja. Question master Mick Stephens. Entrance 3€. Food available, starts 8.00pm. To book, call Mick on 671 447 397 or Terry on 652 450 383. 15th CAS Quiz Night at Sabor de Amor Restaurant, Playa Burriana, Nerja. Question master Dave Jamieson. Entrance 3€. Quiz starts 9.00pm. Food available beforehand. Book direct with Sabor de Amor on 626 354 183. 17th Cómpeta Christmas Party at La Roca, Cómpeta. 8.00pm. Tickets at 15€ include full barbeque (served inside) with wine. Entertainment from Andy Time. TO RESERVE Unless indicated otherwise, telephone the CAS office on 95 252 3607 (10am – 1pm). Out of office hours, please call Mike on 95 252 6312 / 699 948 993. 'Torre del Mar & Los Romanes branches of the Royal British Legion recently held their annual Poppy Ball at the Nerja Caves Restaurant. It was an opportunity for everyone to get formally dressed up, have a jolly good time and raise lots of money for the Poppy Appeal as well. The ladies in particular looked stunning in their ball gowns and eveningwear. Drinks and canapes were served on arrival, followed by a 4 course meal with the wine flowing freely. Music for dancing was provided by Kate and Dan. The evening was a huge success and noone wanted the evening to end which unfortunately it had to on the stroke of midnight. A raffle was held, to which everyone gave extremely generously, raising a record 1000€+ which was donated to the Poppy Appeal.'


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Jerusalem A man and his ever-nagging wife went on vacation to Jerusalem. While they were there, the wife passed away. The undertaker told the husband, "You can have her buried here in the Holy Land for $150 or we can have her shipped back home for $5,000. The husband thought about it and told the undertaker he would have her shipped back

CHRISTMAS OFFER Book an advert during December for January 2012 and receive a FREE Business Directory Listing for 3 months worth 30 euros (adverts inc. are 1/8, 1/4, 1/2 & full page, min. contract 3 months)

Call 664 210 468

Merry Christmas

home. The undertaker asked him, "Why would you spend $5,000 to have her shipped home when you could have a beautiful burial here, and it would only cost $150?” The husband replied, "A long, long time ago, a man died here, was buried here, and three days later, rose from the dead. I just can’t take that chance!"

MR ‘wants CLUTTER your goods’ *House and Garage clearances *Shops and Bars - old stock * Now buying; Antiques, Gold & Jewellery Call David on: 686 375 089 or email a list to: Cash available and efficient service




Van & trailers. Light haulage, removals up to 25m3, car & boat transport. Vinuela based, 25 years experience. Local or anywhere in Europe. Regular Spain-UK-Spain trips. Phone 636 844 209 E-mail:

ACADEMIA GALA SpaniSh CourSeS intenSive & ConverSational all levelS available Including for children starting school C/ Maestro Duran Lopez 6 Torre del Mar

Tel: 952 54 40 39



T H E  D O G  H O U S E

All types of tools Chainsaw Sharpening Service

Alcaucin Based

Mini Digger For Hire For more details call:

693 505 272 693 286 625


While you are away on holiday or a  weekend break, your dogs live in our house alongside our dog.  *Large Enclosed Play Area *Lots of Country Walks *Pet Collection / Delivery Service *Vet Services - On Call *Gourmet Meals



Ring: Phil (mob) 649 079 321 Email: Comares / Benamargosa  Ex - cat & dog Recommended 

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Cleaning of the Colon A detox Enjoy: clearer skin, increased energy, weight loss, mental clarity and more... Call Eileen: 951 167 238 or 609 811 879 (near Hotel Vinuela)


Secondhand Furniture Shop

Open Mon - Fri 9.30am - 2pm

“House Clearances & Books” Call Gilly on: 630 211 907 La Vinuela Pueblo (Down steps at side of Bank)

MAN & VAN! Anytime...Anywhere

Locally based 12 cubic metres €25 per hour Small Loads to U.k Phone Mark:  669 255 968


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? n O s ’ t Wh a

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RIGHTS ARKW The British Store & More OPEN ALL “OURS” Puente don Manuel Call: 952 519 780

Royal British Legion Torre del Mar November Events: For more information Tel Merryll on 663 658 354. Visit our web site at: RBL - Los Romanes Branch We are still a branch of the Royal British Legion. We meet every Tuesday from 12.00 noon until 2.00 pm. at The Garden Restaurant, La Vinuela. On the first Tuesday of every month we have menu del dia at the restaurant. Please feel free to come and join us any time, you do not have to be a member. For social contact Lorraine on 952510203. For other contact Margaret on 951 167 600. Visit our web site on Golfnutz meet every Wednesday at Santa Clara (Otura, Granada) for golf banter, all abilities welcome. Sense of humour essential. So if you need a change in 2011 then give us a call. Call 617 979 640 or caddy master on 858 702 800. Lux Mundi Ecumenical Centre Avda. Moscatel 1”I” Torre Del Mar located near garden complex (Old Casa de la Vina) Daily Events Monday – Friday Spanish Lessons, Beginners, Intermediate, Advanced 10.00am – 12.30pm, Monday & Friday Computer Know How, come and learn 11.00am – 1.00pm, Monday Half Orange, widows, widowers, and singles Group, Monday German Group. Coffee & Library. 3.00pm – 5.00pm, Tuesday Musical Appreciation Group. Sessions are focused on a composer or period of classical music 3.00pm – 5.00pm, Wednesday Art Group, improve your technique 3.00pm – 5.00pm, Thursday Bible Study 1.00pm – 2.00pm. Thursday Darts. 6.00pm for 6.30pm. Friday Coffee Morning. Refreshments, Boutique, Bric-a-brac, preserves, library, books for sale 11.00am – 1.00pm, Friday Keep Fit 1.30pm – 2.30pm. December events 5th A Film Night. Supper and one drink included. Time 7.00pm for 7.30pm. Tickets 5€, 9th Christmas Bazaar. A

great chance to buy your Christmas gifts, also on sale, homemade food, books, tombola, raffle, boutique, bric-a-brac, preserves, videos 11.00am – 1.00pm, Thursday 15th – A Trip to Gibraltar. Coach departs 6.45am, 16th Quiz Night, raffle, supper and drinks included. 6pm for 6.30pm 5€, 17th A Christmas Carol Service at the Parish Church of San Andres, Torre Del Mar. Carols to be sung by three Choirs, Spanish, German and the Coraxalia Choir (An International Choir of over 50 enthusiastic individuals who just love to sing) 8.00pm, 24th 9 Lessons and Carols, at the Centre 6.00pm, 30th Special Coffee Morning, come and enjoy the New Year with grapes, Champagne and treats 11am to 1.00pm 2€, Second week of Dec the possibility of a Trip to the Chocolate Factory in Rute, to see this year’s attraction of the Crib which is a Copy of Malaga City. Final date and details to be advised later. For more information and bookings, call in at the centre, open 10.00am – 1.00pm and 3.00pm - 6.00pm, or telephone 952 543 334 or 952 540432 RBL - Benajarafe Branch Meet every Friday from 12.30-2.30pm, at the coastal, Puerto Niza restaurant, we enjoy bingo, quizzes, more entertainment and monthly outings, a superb lunch inc. drinks, and we welcome all new and existing RBL members. Tel: 603 879 308 BISC - Benajarafe International Social Club We meet every Mon 2.30pm at La Esperanza Cafe/Restaurante, Benajarafe on the coast road at KM 261, we enjoy social, trips,etc for all nationalities. 8th Nov Ladies night, 1st Dec, trip to Gibraltar, 19th Dec x-mas party. Look forward to seeing you there. Call Heather for further details on 634979565. Torre Del Mar Evangelical Church Christmas services: Christmas Carol Service Sunday 11th December at 11.30am. Christmas Day Communion Service Sunday 11.30am December 25th. All Welcome Picasso room Hotel Torremar off Paseo Larios Torre del Mar. Carols at the beach on Wednesday December 14th, 7pm El Ancla Restaurant, Penoncillo Beach, Torrox Costa. Mulled Wine Mince Pies. Info: Tel: Minister 952 532 825 Church Secretary 952 524 373

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What’s O n? U3A El Morche. The El Morche University of the Third Age has a variety of learning groups each with a leader. Groups meet regularly to learn in a friendly and enjoyable way. Covering an area from Rincon to Nerja and inland to Viñuela and beyond. We take part in debating, singing, photography, quizzes, walking, computing and much more. Contact us now at

ABC Dance Group 5th Year. Learn to ballroom dance with 'Dancing Dave' (former waltz competition winner). Dancing is good exercise as well as good social fun! All welcome on Mondays 5pm to 7pm at Trapiche Restaurant, Call David 952531259 or 617863193 (Mobile)

Trapiche Social Club meet every Wednesday from 12 noon - 2pm at El Trapiche Restaurant, Social Activities include card games, skittles, dominoes and occasionally free bingo. Everyone is welcome to join us members and visitors. 7th Xmas Fair phone us to book a stall 680764130 there will be a post box for your Xmas Cards. 14th social meeting, 16th Xmas Dinner Dance with Johnny Calender, choice of Menu €12 per head incl wine on the table. 21st social meeting with mince pies & coffee open Xmas Card post box, 28th social meeting. Advance News. Trip to the 3 Kings parade in Malaga €8 book early. Social Activities booking line 680 764 130. Further information from the Publicity Office run by Jerry, 952517497.

CAS event for November 17th CAS Quiz Night at Sabor de Amor Restaurant, Playa Burriana, Nerja. Question master Dave Jamieson. Entrance 3€. Quiz starts 9.00pm. Food available beforehand. Book direct with Sabor de Amor on 626 354 183.

Come Dancing for Cudeca Sue, Mike, John and Joyce would like to wish all their members old and new a very Happy Christmas and a Healthy, Happy New Year. They look forward to seeing them all on 10th December at El Trapiche for their Christmas dance. Unfortunately tickets for this event are now sold out. The first dance of 2012 will be on 21st of January. To book please contact Joyce on 699 156 471 Lake Vinuela Social Club We meet every Thurs from midday until approx 2.30 at the Bar Atila in Puente don Manuel to enjoy social activities and meet new like minded friends. We regularly have a quiz, bingo, surprise events and presentations, also a monthly lunch at various restaurants in the area. Our aim is to enjoy ourselves and to raise monies for various local and international charities and organisations. Nov Events: 3rd General Meeting, 5th Charity Bonfire Night Quiz, 10th General meeting and Bring & Buy Xmas Sale, 17th General meeting & Bring & Buy Xmas Sale, 20th General Meeting, 25th Sayalonga Wine trip. 9th Dec Shopping Trip Gibraltar. Call: 636 203 135

Vinuela Ecological Farmers Market Opposite the Pharmacy. 1st & 3rd Sat each month. 10.30-14.3. Fresh Handmade organic produce. Fruit & Veg, Cakes, Chutney & Jams, Sweets, Tarts, Bread, Pasta & Fresh Sauces , Mustards, Olive Pate, Natural Soap, Fertilizer, etc.


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n o i t a m r Info ...In our own random order! Bus Times Call: 952 540 936 Nerja-Malaga 06:30, 07:30, 08:30 08:55, 10:10, 11:10, 12:25, 13:40, 14:55, 15:55, 17:10, 18:40, 19:40, 20:25 Malaga-Nerja 07:00, 08:15, 09:15, 10:30, 11:45, 12:30, 13:00, 14:00, 15:15; 17:30; 18:45, 20:15, 20:45, 21:30 Expect to pay approx 2.90€ one way and 5.15€ round trip Nerja-Nerja Caves 08:10, 08:25, 09:40, 10:40, 11:50; 11:55, 12:35, 13:10, 13:35, 14:25, 15:25; 16:40; 18:10, 18:55, 19:30, 20:10 Nerja Caves-Nerja 08:45, 10:00, 11:00, 12:00, 12:15, 12:50, 13:30, 14:45. 15:45, 17:00 17:45; 18:30; 19:30; 20:15 Expect to pay approx 0.80€ one way Nerja-Torre see Nerja-Malaga times Torre-Nerja 07:45, 09:00, 09:15, 10:00, 11:00, 11:15; 11:45, 12:30, 13:15, 14:45, 16:00, 17:30, 18:15, 19:30, 21:00, 22:00. Church services in English Services at inglesia de San Miquel (St, Michael's Church) every Sunday at 12 noon (except during May) and at Capilla de Nuestra Señora del Carmen (Fisherman's Chapel, Chinasol). There is a short service of Holy Communion Wednesday's at 9.30am in the Church Shop, Calle Malaga, Nerja. Details of how to find the churches are also available in the Church Shop. Priest in Charge: Father Geoff Johnston Tel: Church House 952 521 339 Church Shop 952 522 460. Competa - Holy Communion every Sunday at 5.30pm in the Parish Church, Plaza Almijara, Cómpeta Tel: 952 219 396 Malaga - St. George´s Church in the Engish Cemetery. 11.00am Sundays Tel: 952 219 396 Torre del Mar - Torre Del Mar - Sanysol Residencia, Sundays 10.30am. Tel 952 219 396 anglican communion. Torre del Mar - St Barnabas Church (IERE) Spanish episcopal services in English at 11am, Morning Prayer 1st and 3rd Sundays. Holy Communion 2nd and 4th Sundays. Tel. 952

Local Police : 091 guardia : 062 Fire : 080 030 461 (Priest). Lux Mundi Ecumenical Centre, Avda Moscatel 1 "I", (Gardens of Viña Malaga/ Antigua Casa Del Viña). roman Catholic - Torre del Mar - Lux Mundi Ecumenical Centre, Saturdays 5pm, (Winter), Saturdays 6pm, (Summer) Evangelical - Torre del Mar Evangelical (Presbyterian Church) meets every Sunday for Worship in English at 11.30am in the Picasso Room, Hotel Torremar, (off Paseo Larios) C/ Saladero Viejo 15 Torre del Mar. All welcome. Minister J. Hartsmith Foy. Tel: 952 532 825 or: Torrox Park Community Church meet at 11am on Thursday for coffee and discussion on current topics. This is an informal meeting for everyone to join in. At Tapricho Tapas bar (opposite El Pino camping), Torrox park. more info: Minister J. hartsmith foy, Tel: 952 532 825 or Puente don Manuel - Fellowship of the King, Sunday Worship - 11am. Wednesday Fellowship - fortnightly 7pm. Midweek activities - Pilates - Tues midday-1pm, Bridge club tues 2.15-6pm, Art group Thurs 3-5pm, Charity shop/books Fri 10-2pm, Camera club 1st Fri of month 2.30-5pm. We meet at Fellowship of the King premises situated underneath Maroma Inmobiliaria, El Cruce de Puente don Manuel. Phone 952 115 220 or 952 518 185 Torre del Mar Evangelical Church (Part of the Spanish Evangelical Church in partnership with Presbyterian Church Ireland) Sunday service in English 11.30am. Picasso Room Hotel Torremar off Paseo Larios Torre del Mar Minister Rev. J. Hartsmith Foy Telephone 952 532 825 Bank hours Usually 8:30am-2pm except Sundays, Bank holidays and Fiestas. Please note, the majority of banks will not accept bills to be paid (ie: electric, phone, rates) after 11am. Taxis Torre: 952 540 016, Nerja: 952 520 537 Velez Malaga: 952 540 016, Puente Don Manuel: 952 510 992 Mob: 616 034 636.

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ambulance : 061 water : 952 540 662 Electricity : 952 540 662 Tourist information Nerja: 952 521 531 Torre del Mar: 952 541 104


Dial 1002 to report a fault on the line. For general enquiries dial 1004

weekly Market days Mondays: Torrox Costa Tuesdays: Nerja & Country Farmers Market, at Jardines del Trapiche on the road to Benamagosa. wednesdays; Rincon de la Victoria & Algarrobo Costa Thursdays: Velez Malaga & Torre del Mar & Frigilana Fridays: Puente don Manuel & Cala de Moral Saturdays: Caleta de Velez , Competa & Benajarafe Sundays: Malaga Consulates Uk Opposite the main bus station Edif, Eurocom Bloque Sur C/Mauricio Moro 2-2º- Malaga 952 352 300 ireland Avda, de los Boliches, Nº15 Fuengirola 952 475 108 Netherlands/Dutch Avda, Palma de Mallorca, 57 Edif. Castillo San Louis, bajo 29620 Torremolinos 952 380 888 germany C/Mauricio Moro 2, Malaga 952 363 591 Sweden 952 604 383 France 952 226 590 / 952 214 888 Belgium 952 559 159 Denmark 952 211 797 Luxembourg 952 857 197 Telefonica



airports Malaga 24-hour information 952 048 484 or 952 048 804 granada 952 048 804 airlines Shops 10am - 2pm - 5pm - 8:30pm (generally) The municipal market (fruit and veg) and the weekly markets are only open mornings. water Supplies Velez Malaga: 952 506 450 Nerja: 952 520 154 Malaga: 952 135 013 railway Stations Malaga: 952 360 202 granada: 958 271 272 Town halls Torre and Velez: 952 500 100 Torrox: 952 538 200 Nerja: 952 548 400 Competa: 952 516 006 rincon: 952 402 300 Malaga: 952 135 000 hospitals Nerja ambulatorio: 952 523 131 Velez Malaga: 951 067 000 iTV Call: 902 575 757 or 952 551 084 - Open Mon - Fri 08.00am 18.45pm, Sat: 08:00am - 12.45pm


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) : a h a h s e k o J A hippie gets on a bus and spies a pretty young nun. He sits down next to her, and asks her: "Can we have sex?" "No," she replies, "I'm married to God." She stands up, and gets off at the next stop. The bus driver, who overheard, turns to the hippie and says: "I can tell you how to get to have sex with her!" "Yeah?", says the hippie. "Yeah!", says the bus driver. "She goes to the cemetery every Tuesday night at midnight to pray, so all you have to do is dress up in a robe with a hood, put some of that luminous powder stuff in your beard, and pop up in the cemetery claiming to be God." The hippie decides to give it a try, and arrives in the cemetery dressed as suggested on the next Tuesday night. "I am God," he declares to the nun, keeping the hood low about his face. "Have sex with me." The nun agrees without question, but begs him to restrict himself to anal sex, as she is desperate not to lose her virginity. 'God' agrees, and promptly has his wicked way with her. As he finishes, he jumps up and throws back his hood with a flourish. "Ha-ha," he cries. "I'm the hippie!" "Ha-ha," cries the nun. "I'm the bus driver! -----------------------------------------------------------A few minutes before the church services started, the congregation were sitting in their pews and talking. Suddenly, Satan appeared at the front of the church. Everyone started screaming and running for the front entrance, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from evil incarnate. Soon the church was empty except for one elderly gentleman who sat calmly in his pew without moving, seemingly oblivious to the fact that God's ultimate enemy was in his presence.. So Satan walked up to the man and said, 'Do you know who I am?' The man replied, 'Yep, sure do.' 'Aren't you afraid of me?' Satan asked. 'Nope, sure ain't.' said the man. 'Don't you realise I can kill you with one word?'

asked Satan. 'Don't doubt it for a minute,' replied the old man, in an even tone. 'Did you know that I can cause you profound, horrifying AGONY for all eternity?' persisted Satan. 'Yep,' was the calm reply. 'And you are still not afraid?' asked Satan. 'Nope,' said the old man More than a little perturbed, Satan asked, 'Why aren't you afraid of me?' The man calmly replied, 'Been married to your sister for 48 years. ------------------------------------------------------------A hillbilly farmer who wanted to get a divorce paid a visit to a lawyer. The lawyer said, 'How can I help you?' The farmer said, 'I want to get one of them dayvorces.' The lawyer said, 'Do you have any grounds?' The farmer said, 'Yes, I got 40 acres' The lawyer said, 'No, no, you don't understand, Do you have a suit? The farmer said, 'Yes, I got a suit, I wears it to church on Sundays.' The lawyer said, 'No, no, I mean, do you have a case?' The farmer said, 'No, I ain't got a case, but I got a John Deere. The lawyer said, 'No, I mean, do you have a grudge?' The farmer said,'Yes, I got a grudge, that's where I parks the John Deere' The lawyer said, 'Does your wife beat you up or something?' The farmer said, 'No, we both get up at 4:30.' By now the lawyer is getting frustrated but tries one last question. The lawyer said, 'Is your wife a nagger?' The farmer said, 'No, she's a little white gal, but our last child was a nagger and that's why I wants a dayvorce.' ------------------------------------------------------------What’s the difference between an illegal Mexican and ET? ET looked better, smelled better, learned English, didn’t claim benefits, had his own bike, and wanted to go home!

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Jokes h a h a :) A guy is browsing in a pet shop, and sees a parrot sitting on a little perch. It doesn't have any feet or legs. The guy says aloud, 'Jeesh, I wonder what happened to this parrot.?' The parrot says, 'I was born this way. I'm a defective parrot.' 'Holy crap,' the guy replies. 'You actually understood and answered me!' 'I got every word,' says the parrot. 'I happen to be a highly intelligent, and a thoroughly educated bird' 'Oh yeah?' the guy asks. 'Then answer this, how do you hang onto your perch, without any feet.?' 'Well,' the parrot says, 'this is very embarrassing, but since you asked, I wrap my weenie around this wooden bar, like a little hook. You can't see it, because of my feathers.' 'Wow,' says the guy. 'You really can understand, and can speak English, can't you.?' 'Actually, I speak both Spanish and English, and I can converse with reasonable competence on almost any topic, politics, religion, sports, physics, philosophy. I'm especially good at ornithology. You really ought to buy me, I'd be a great companion.' The guy looks at the €200 price tag. 'Sorry, but I just can't afford that.' 'Pssssssst,' says the parrot, 'I'm defective, so the truth is, nobody wants me, cause I don't have any feet. You can probably get me for €20, just make the guy an offer!' The guy offers €20, and walks out with the parrot. Weeks go by. The parrot is sensational. He has a great sense of humour, he's interesting, he's a great pal, he understands everything, he sympathizes, and he's insightful. The guy is delighted. One day the guy comes home from work, and the parrot goes, 'Psssssssssssst,' and motions him over with one wing. 'I don't know if I should tell you this or not, but it's about your wife, and the UPS man.' 'What are you talking about,?' asks the guy. 'When the UPS man delivered a package today, your wife greeted him at the door, in a sheer black nightie.'

‘WHAT???' the guy asks incredulously. THEN what happened?' 'Well, then the UPS man came into the house, and lifted up her nightie, and began petting her all over,' reported the parrot. 'NO!' he exclaims, 'and she let him.?' 'Yes. Then he continued taking off the nightie, got down on his knees, and began to kiss her all over.' Then the frantic guy demands, 'THEN WHAT HAPPENED.?' DUNNO?!? I got a hard-on, and fell off my perch!’ ------------------------------------------------------------One Monday morning the postman is walking through the neighbourhood on his usual route, delivering the mail. As he approached one of the homes, he noticed that both cars were still in the driveway. His wonder was cut short by David, the homeowner, coming out with a load of empty beer, wine and spirit bottles for the recycling bin. "Wow, David, looks like you guys had one hell of a party last night," the Postman commented. David, in obvious pain, replied, "Actually we had it Saturday night. This is the first I have felt like moving since 4am Sunday morning. We had about 15 couples from around the neighbourhood over for some weekend fun and it got a bit wild. We all got so drunk around midnight that we started playing 'WHO AM I?'." The Postman thinks a moment and said, "How do you play 'WHO AM I?' ?" "Well, all the guys go in the bedroom and come out one at a time covered with a sheet with only the 'family jewels' showing through a hole in the sheet. Then the women try to guess who it is.." The postman laughed and said, "Sounds like fun, I'm sorry I missed it." "Probably a good thing you did," David responded." Your name came up 7 times." ------------------------------------------------------------Paddy's in the bathroom and Murphy shouts to him. "Did you find the shampoo?" Paddy says, "Yes but it's for dry hair and I've just wet mine."


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s e g a P Puzzle Get Quizical

Hey Diddle Riddle

1. What is a snoek?

2. On poker dice, what colour is the queen? 3. Who was the arch enemy of Dan Dare? 4. What are Napier’s bones? 5. What makes a Pink Gin pink?

1. A murderer is condemned to death. He has to choose between three rooms. The first is full of raging fires. The second is full of assassins with loaded guns. The third is full of lions that haven't eaten in 3 years. Which room is safest for him? 2. A woman shoots her husband. Then she holds him under water for over 5 minutes. Finally, she hangs him. But 5 minutes later they both go out together and enjoy a wonderful dinner together. How can this be?

6. Which craft is Honiton noted for?

3. What is black when you buy it, red when you use it, and grey when you throw it away?

7. What is Verjuice?

4. Can you name three consecutive days without using the words Wednesday, Friday, or Sunday?

8. What are a group of owls called?

5. This is an unusual paragraph. I'm curious as to just how quickly you can find out what is so unusual about it. It looks so ordinary and plain that you would think nothing was wrong with it. 10. What was the name of Napoleans horse? In fact, nothing is wrong with it! It is highly unusual though. Study it and think about it, but you 11. Which direction is Widdershins? still may not find anything odd. But if you work at it a bit, you might find out. Try to do so without any coaching! 12. What was Kim Philbys real first name? Answers on page 109 9. What is an Irish Peach?

Sudokus Easy


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Puzzle P ages

Crossword across


1 Confined space (4)

2 (French) policeman (8)

3 Chaotic place — slaughterhouse (8)

4 Fireplace (6)

8 Extended (4) 9 Take a tumble (4,4) 11 Tarmac (for the boys in Bleasdale’ play?)

5 Evildoer (10) 6 Present in person, not recorded (4)


7 ride the waves (or the net) (4)

14 Fruit used as vegetable (6)

10 artist’s vade mecum (10)

15 Uncommon (6)

12 Trousers worn with stockings (8)

17 Driver of roman vehicle (10)

13 in a dreadful manner (8)

20 reverenced (8)

16 Light wind (6)

21 European freshwater fish (4) 22 Take pear (anag) — bird (8) 23 Expression of surprise (1,3)

18 Parliamentary disciplinarian (4) 19 aspersion (4)


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s n g i S r Sta Mystic Mag tells it like it is….For good or for worse. Capricorn – Watch out for sports injuries this month as you are destined to be more accident prone than usual when partaking in pastimes or hobbies. Avoid contact sports at all costs. Lucky sign – A piano Aquarius – Love issues are prevalent for you Aquarians in December. Make sure you buy your spouse or partner a decent pressie as they tend to be a little materialistic darrrling! Disappointment may cause tension. Lucky sign – Empty pockets Pisces – Travel plans may be delayed this month due to sudden and unforeseen circumstances. But it’s not all doom and gloom. In fact the surprise happenings will be positive rather than negative. Lucky sign – Local bookshop Aries – If there’s one thing you really must do this month it is to buy a new hat…not because you’re about to be invited to a wedding – just to hide your face! Lucky sign – hehehehahahehe Taurus – You are feeling disappointed at the way a certain member of your family is behaving. But don’t worry too much as good outweighs bad. Good always wins, as the universe will soon prove. Lucky sign – Past facts Gemini – Learn the Greek alphabet if I were you, it may come in handy when you least expect to need it. Lucky sign – Alpha

Cancer – Set your sights on achieving your lifelong goals and dreams. Don’t be afraid to take the plunge. Continuing with something you don’t like is for losers and that is not you. Lucky sign – Change Leo – You have proved to the world and sundry that there is hope. Keep doing things exactly as you are and the world will be a better place all round. Lucky sign – Teaching elders Virgo – Your memory is not what it used to be…your brain cells seem to be dying faster than usual. Lucky sign – What was that?! Libra – Good things come to those that wait, so in December, 34 years down the line, you will finally receive the hugest most amazing surprise of your life! Lucky sign – A waiting room Scorpio – Your spiritual awareness thrives this month and the universe helps you reach your ultimate goal. Lucky sign – Bright white light Sagittarius – Christmas is a time of over indulgence, but be careful how many fatty puddings and stodgy sausages you decide to cram into your gut….your heart won’t love you for it. Lucky sign – Moderation. If it is your Birthday in December…You will pay more trips to the supermarket than usual, largely because your appetite will spiral out of control. Must be an onset of the winter blues!

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email The top ten most corrupt countries in the world... 1. Somalia 2. Myanmar 3. Iraq


Top Tens ,8, 7,6, 5 ,4,3 ,2, 1 ,

4. Afghanistan 5. Uzbekistan 6. Turkmenistan

The top ten least corrupt countries in the world...

7. Sudan 8. Chad 9. Burundi


1. Denmark 2. New Zealand

10. Equatorial Guinea

3. Singapore 4. Finland 5. Sweden 6. Canada 7. Netherlands 8. Australia 9. Switzerland 10. Norway

get Quizical answers 1. A fish, 2. Green, 3. The Mekon, 4. Logarithm tables, 5. Angostura bitters, 6. Lace making, 7. Juice of unripe grapes, 8. A parliament, 9. An apple, 10. Marengo, 11. Counter clockwise, 12. Harold. riddle Diddle answers 1. The third. If the lions haven’t eaten for three years, they will be dead, 2. She is a photographer. She ‘shoots’ him, holds the print under water to develop it then ‘hangs’ it to dry, 3. BBQ charcoal, 4. Sure you can: yesterday, today and tomorrow, 5. The most common letter in the English language is ‘e’. This paragraph does not have a single one.

Last Month’s Crossword answers


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r e d a r The T E

oto. t inc. ph r e v d a boxed 8 nth. 15€ for 7th of the mocall: 664 210 46 r o s d r 1 o r e w o th 8 th before e mon um of 2 maxim nt to be made efore 17th of th a r fo 3€ Payme b n s@these mail sale

Cars or Sale / Wanted

Properties For Sale/Rent

125CC SCOOTEr for sale (2008), 1 Owner from new 13,000 km - €650.00. Call: 664136624

For rent 2 bedroom apartment in competa

FOrD MONDEO 1997, 1.8 Zetec engine, 120,000 miles. Good condition, very reliable. €550 Tel: 660 708 441 CaraVaN 4M, Avondale Kingfisher. 4 berth. Cooker, Fridge, Heater, shower & portaloo. Clean & tidy. €650 Tel: 660 708 441 ChEaP Car FOr SaLE 1999 Opel Astra 1.7 Turbo diesel. Spanish Registered LHD. Brand new ITV til November 2012. Just fully serviced. Aircon serviced... freezing cold. C/locking. P.A.S. White with grey trim. Nice clean car runs well. Price 1500€ includes transfer and road tax up to date. Phone Mike 951 321446 or 646 295994 rENaULT CLiO, 1996, ITV new, A/C, lot of new parts (cooler, brakes, tyres, front screen, tooth belt, v-belt etc.) 1.500€, call 606 423 869

Fully Fitted kitchen A/C & Open Fire Large Sun Terrace, Wifi Available 300€ per month Tel: 633722792 Or Uk No. 0044 (0) 1579 340624 Contact Debi:


2 bed, 2 bath ground floor apartment in El Morche with underground garage, fully furnished.

Short or Long Term

Properties For Sale/Rent

400€ per month

TOrrOX PUEBLO LargE TOwNhOUSE 150sqm and terrace. In need of rebuild with plans. Paperwork in order. Call: 609 931 224 / 616 743 628 18,000€.


NErJa - House for long-term rent, 3 beds, newly renovated, community pool, peaceful area, parking. 600€ p/month Call: 635 119 078 iNVESTMENT OPPOrTUNiTY, one bedroom, first floor flat above shops in Sidcup, Kent. Lounge, Kitchen, Bathroom/wc, own parking space. 30mins train to London Bridge. Price £109,950, possible income £6,600 year after agents fees. Call: 675 391 967

Call: 639 12 07 07

Futurmat Rimini Coffee Machine 2 outlets, hot water and milk spout Excellent condition serviced October suitable for bar 400€ Telephone Lisa 636081290 or call into Bar Triana, Triana.

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3€ for a maximu m of 28 Pay wo Email: s ales@th ment to be ma rds or 15€ for esentine d e e before the 17nquire about b before 1 o 5th of thth of the month xed adverts e month . or call: 6 64 210 4 68

Properti es

Properties For Sale/Rent FLaT, 90M , in Vélez-Málaga, new, 5 mins to schools, health centre, supermarket, bus station, highway and 5 km to the sea. 3 bedrooms, a prime quality furnished kitchen, 22m2 terrace, lift and garage. €159.000, tlf: 606 764 539. Ready to move in. 2

LaND FOr SaLE, 2100sqm, Fantastic views of Maroma, suitable for caravan, concrete track, Elec/water on plot. 25,000€ 693 269 766 TOwNhOUSE FOr SaLE Charming town house in Riogordo. 3 bed, lounge with log burner, fitted kitchen/diner, terrace, parking. Reduced to €119,000. Tel 606 734 012

ViLLA FOR SALe CALeTA Charming secluded villa overlooking the bay of Torre del Mar Consisting of 2 large bedrooms, spacious lounge, kitchen and bathroom. Self contained one bed apartment overlooking swimming pool. Fully modernised with double glazing, aircon and wood burning cassette. Garage and large offroad parking area. Reduced Price 375,000€ Tel: 952 550 628 / 678 490 331 or email

BraND NEw LargE 4 BEDrOOM, TOwNhOUSE 3 bathroom for sale or rent in Riogordo. €195,000 to buy €550 PCM to rent. More details and photos Tel: 676 851 135 email hOUSE FOr SaLE in Velez Malaga.137sq. 69sq of open plan lounge diner and kitchen. 2 double bedrooms 2 bathrooms (one en suite bathroom). Each bedroom has a terrace. Roof terrace with views of Velez. Air con and log burner. Street parking. 5 mins from townhall. 179.000€ Call 615 266 712.

ApArtment For SAle el morche This one bed, one bath apartment is situated just two minutes away from the beautiful sandy beach of El Morche. It has a separate kitchen, balcony, marble floors, communal swimming pool and it comes fully furnished. It's an ideal starter home or holiday home.

Price: €105,000 For more info or to arrange a viewing call 610 976 284 or email


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r e d a r The T

photo. ert inc. v d a d e r box nth. 68 r 15€ fo17th of the mocall: 664 210 4 o s d r o of 28 w onth or fore the aximum be made be re 17th of the m m a r 3€ fo Payment to befo nell thesenti @ s le sa Email

Items For Sale


ChihUahUa PUPPiES beautiful & cute. 350€ each. Call Penny: 638 191 391

i wiLL COLLECT FrEE of charge all your used clothing, bric-a-brac, pots and pans, books, toys, CD´s garden pots, tools, pieces of furniture or anything else you are throwing out whilst you are cleaning. Call me on Tel:- 658 72 92 74 Jacqui

aNTiQUE PiNE DrESSEr, base, 3 cupboards with draws, top, two glass fronted cupboards with lights 300€ whiTE PVC 2FT BY 4FT breeding box for cats or dogs, (has been used for guinea pigs & rabbits) Totally secures small animals, flat packs, fully washable 40€ Call: 952 550 041 652 236 462 "BiSONTE" Woodburning stove with fan 56cm high, 59cm wide 50cm Depth. 295€ Tel: 645 444 064 SaNYO VhS Video Cassette Recorder 35€ Tel: 645 444 064 DOUBLE DiVaN BED inc. mattress, used only as a guest bed, good condition. 70€ o.n.o buyer collects. Call: 676 491 811 ViNTagE POrT - 3 cases CROFTS VINTAGE PORT, original sealed boxes with code numbers. Year 1977, 1985 and 1991. Offered at 1,000€ for all three (ave. 28€ per bottle, U.K price 50/£60 per bottle) or 400/450€ per case if sold separatley. Tel: 0044 7834342107 or 633 384 654

waNTED BriTiSh FaMiLiES with children from 10 to 18 to host Spanish student for 3 weeks during summer. We will pay for the student expenses. Contact waNTED - DaVE aND aNNiE (the pie people) from Los Romanes appear to have gone missng from the community. If anyone knows of their whereabouts please contact me via email: hOME waNTED FOr 2 Beautiful semi-Ragdoll Kittens (1 B/W boy, 1 Tortie female) available to a good and permanent home. 25€ to cover the cost of vaccination. Photos available on request. Contact 618 989 125 CarErS rEQUirED for lady with MS. Must be over 5,5”, fit and energetic with full driving licence. Please call Sarah 952 967 114 Torrox Costa


2 COMFOrTaBLE SOFaS: 3-seater (195 cm.) & 2-seater (170 cm.). “Box”-shaped with scatter cushions & loose covers in terracotta colour. 85€ each or 150€ the pair. Tel: 616 517 836.

rEaL ESTaTE SiTUaTED in Cómpeta is looking for a Danish speaking salesperson with experience and driving license. Send C.V to

SECOND haND aMEriCaN hOT TUB for sale, 5 seater, excellent condition, with instructions, installed but never used. 2,500€ o.n.o. Call: 952 550 323 / 616 119 007 Transportation can be arranged at extra cost.

We are Iberdrola the alternative energy  supplier. We are looking for top sales people from the Axarquia area.  If this is you!!! Email me on: or call me on: 952 534 954 between 10 am-4 pm

CAN YOU SELL anything?

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email

Busines s


We can Call tod list your Busin ay on 66 es 4 210 4 s here from ju 68 or E st mail: sa 5 euros a mo les@the sentinell nth!!

ACCOMMODATION wEscuela La Crujia rural B&B/guesthouse in a pretty converted schoolbuilding. 5 minutes from Velez-Malaga. Tel. 606 010 580. Email:

AIR CONDITIONING w For air Conditioning call Esola, 616 119 007, Torre del Mar w For reliable and honest servicing, Repairs, Re-Gas and Installations of A/C & Pool Heating at competitive rates by a qualified Technician. Call “Polarair “ Tel: Susie or Peter on 655211192 / 658418093 w air conditioning, Repairs, Servicing, Installation. Tel: 651 198 409 Email:

BLINDS wSolar blinds, ideal for large glazed areas to keep the view but also giving privacy and stopping maximum amounts of heat/glare and fading of furnishings. Speak to Ian 644 54 61 76 958 49 65 71

BOOKSHOPS wPasatiempo Calle Infantes 32, Torre del Mar, 952 543 703,


Director y

warkwrights English Shop. Turn right at Venta Baja Crossroads or call: 952 519 780

BUILDERS wall types of building work undertaken, 37 years experience, Let me quote you. Call: 952 110 788 or 650 895 461 wreformers Terence Mitchell - Renovations & Refurbishments. Professional builders with over 20 years experience. Tiling, painting, plumbing, electricity. Free advice, no obligations. Tel: 664 459 868. wPJM Construction. Professional builder experienced in all types of construction from routine maintenance to new builds. Happy to supply references from many satisfied customers. Call now for a no obligation quote 625 348 406

Advertise here from 5€ a month Call: 664 210 468 Email:


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Business Listing BUILDERS (Continued)


wJr Construction Extensions, Reforms, Tiling (Int & Ext), Terraces, Walls, Garages and Painting. Reliable, Quality Workmanship. For a quotation ring John: 699 261 414. C/Virgen de la Milagrosa NÂş 3, Los Romanes, 29713, Malaga. wr&D Construction and Maintenance Services, with over 30 years experience, English plastering, reforms, plumbing, electrics, walls, tiling and painting, all aspects of building work, property maintenance and management. Call Robert 619 232 025 or David 622 379 413 email,

wregisitered Chiropodist/Podiatrist offering a complete footcare service in the comfort of your own home. 15yrs experience NHS & private. Call: 636 866 715 wregistered Chiropodist/Nurse of 20 years. New in Velez Malaga. Offers the following services:- Foot and hand care (diabetic, veruccas, fungus nails, ingrown toenails). Also home visits. Post hospital aftercare including physio. Call Teresa: 695 243 238

CAR PARTS wMalaga Car Parts,for the best value car parts in Southern Spain, Torrox Costa 952 530 531

CAR AND VAN RENTAL wOne way car & van hire, UK, France and Spain. Call: 952 541 147

CAR HIRE wCar hire, Lowest rates in Southern Spain. UK Company.

CARS WANTED wwanted all UK plated vehicles. Year 2000 onwards. cash paid. Call: 667 235 205

CARERS wNerja Nurses, Professional Nurses. Reliable - Affordable - Local Quality Care. NHS Qualified & Trained - 25 years experience in ALL types of care. Tel: 628 793 413 or 952 030 713 email:

CARPENTERS wandrew rodgers 20 years experience in kitchens, wardrobes, shelving, aluminium door & windows. Call the Window Doctor for any window problem. Roller shutter blinds, mosquito blinds, security locks, repairs and renewals reasonable rates, Tel: 660 597 894 email:

CARPET & UPHOLSTERY CLEANING wCarpet & Upholstery Cleaning. Professional Machines, 18 years experience. All areas covered. Call Roy on 958 640 068 or 656 561 669.

CHIROPRACTIC CARE wPhilippe Druart D.C., grad. from AECC (GB) and USA, 30 years exp., opens a chiropractic clinic in Frigiliana, C/ Blas Infante, 2 bajo. Consultations: Monday from 16.30 to 20.30, Wednesday and Friday from 10.00 to 14.00 and by appointment. Tel. 951 708 672 & 678 691 387. Email:

CLEANING wDone & Dusted, for all your cleaning requirements, for your home, holiday rentals, cleaning during your holiday stay, pool cleans, general maintenance, repairs and gardening. Competitive rates. Call Juliet 692 437 039 Deb 622 863 255 Dave 622 379 413 or Rob 619 232 025 Email: wFiona’s Cleaning Services. Spring Cleans, Regular House Cleans, Holiday Rental Cleans, And End Of Lease Cleans. We Love The Jobs You Hate! SATISFACTION GUARANTEED! Phone: 687 285 275 Email:

COMPUTERS computer problems solved. Torrox/Nerja and surrounding areas. Free Advice. No Fix No Fee. Hardware, Software and Website solutions. PC service - only 50 Euros. Call Rab on: 952 967 124 or 645 236 259. wComputer help.Troubleshooting & Repairs. New PCs supplied with Windows in English. WiFi installations. Reasonable rates. Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer since 2000. Patient & professional. Call David on 952 54 96 07 or 654 899 976.

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email


Business Listing COMPUTERS (cont) wComputer Problems? Help is at hand. Upgrades, repairs, hardware and software problems solved, NO FIX - NO FEE. Advice on buying and setting up the right computer for you. Tuition from complete beginners to advanced, get the most out of your PC. Call David Fleck on: 952 510 729 / 620 328 382 email:

DAMP CONTROL wProfessional control of all rising and penetrating dampness in your home, including leaking terraces etc. Long term solutions and cures for any damp problem at affordable prices, please ring: 666 991 041 for further advice and free survey without obligation.

DENTISTRY wClinica Europa Centro internacional, Blq. 86, Torrox Costa. Call: 952 53 09 08 Email: British dentist, 24hrs response Call: 648 203 157 wian Pett Dental Care, Five star dental care you can trust. Edif. Al-Zabel, Local 7, Cruce de Periana, 29713 Alcaucin, Puente don Manuel. 951 139 287 / 691 700 587 UK +44 1708 616 148. wDentadanes s.c Dental Clinic Offering Danish, top quality dental care at Spanish prices. Est. since 1991. We speak English, Danish, German, Spanish and Italian. Tel: 952 529 666 Mon-Fri 105pm

DOG GROOMING wThe Dog Shop, Professional grooming salon. All dogs welcome, any size, any breed. Tel: 645 525 782, Centro Comercial, 10, Torrox Park.

DRAIN CLEARANCE wwayne’s Drains & Plumbing Est.1999. 24 Hour call out. Tel/Fax: 952 539 425. 24 Hour Service: 634 275 030

DRESSMAKER wDressmaker/Seamstress, with over 20 years experience. High quality, reliable service for alterations, soft furnishings and dressmaking. Call Elaine on 629 610 919. Located Puente Don Manuel/Periana area. Very reasonable rates. No

job too small.

ELECTRICIANS wElectro-Cute! English J.I.B. Electrician. For all your electrical needs and problems. Fault find ing/Lighting and Power/Electric gates and Inter coms/Pool and water Pumps, Rewires/Upgrades. Over 40 years exp. Tel Stefan 610 048 919 elec wElectrician - Lakeside Property Services, 24 hour call out emergency Electrician and Plumber. Call David on: 627 931 357

ESTATE AGENTS/REAL ESTATE wab ax Properties 650 193 777 Website: wFleming Properties, Calle Las Melosas, Edf Nautico, Torre del Mar, 952 547 131 or 637 278 306, waxarquia Properties S.LCall; 626 038 851 or 952 436 Email: wBuy a home Spain/rent a home Spain, Avenida Andalucia, 135, Torre del Mar. Call: 952 547 554 or 680 210 414. Email: Website:

FASHION Wholesalers, manu facturers & designers of premier British fashion labels. Tel: 966 191 560 / Mob: 676 059 997 email:

FURNITURE wLargest range of furniture on the Costas. Guaranteed lowest prices. Quality furniture from the UK. wCudeca Second Hand Furniture Shop, 952 545 212 Calle Infantes 48, Torre del Mar (by Thursday market) Mon-Fri 10.00-13.30 and 17.30-19.30. Saturdays 10.00-13.30 only. If you wish to donate furniture please call Melanie on 638 108 564

GARDENING SERVICES wPool and garden maintenance. Good rates Call Keith 952 554 514 / 674 526 968

Advertise here for 60 euros for 12 months Call 664 210 468 Email:


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Business Listing GARDENING SERVICES (cont.)


wred Palm Beetles, Wasps, Ants, Woodlice, Mice, Rats and all pests. Processionary Moths. Call us for treatment and disposal of these garden problems. Tel: 657 165 373

wCarousel Second hand Furniture, Vinuela Pueblo (Under Cajamar Bank), access via steps at side of bank, or slip road behind bank, 630 211 907

GREETINGS CARDS wTarjetas. Rosemary George. For all occasions, English & Spanish. Organic, Handmade & much more Supplying to shops, bars, clubs & individuals. Telephone: 617 979 640 Email:

HAIRDRESSING wSusanna's Mobile hairdressing Services. National Beauty Institute (UK) trained. Please telephone 693 384 270 or 0044 844 3089078

HEALTH & BEAUTY wweight Control - Herbalife Independent Distributor, Bea Savory, 95 253 4795 (business opportunity also available): wweight watchers Meetings in English. Nerja and Vélez. Call Candace on 952 549 607 or 626 672 493 for further info.

HEATING winfrasol infrared heating Systems, Infrared Panels for inside your home STOPS DAMP, economical to run. Easy Installation, No maintenance, Outside Heaters for your terrace, winter rooms and smoking areas. Call for quote 952967015 wredwell® – the leading brand in Infrared Heating Systems. White panels and designs like mirrors, pictures, glass etc. Low consumption, low running time due to partial storage material inside. Prevents damp. Contact/showroom: Avda. El Faro, Bl. 75, bajo 9, Torrox Costa, call 952 539 742,,


INTERNET SERVICES wriosat:SL, High speed internet and telephone services for home, business, offices, hotels, bars and restaurants etc. SDSL & ADSL packages available. Call: 951 239 310 / 626 679 018. Email: Web: http// wBroadband - 951 239 888 Avenida Torrox 1, Competa (near Eloys bar).

INTERPRETERS winterpreter - English/Spanish - based in Vélez-Málaga. English nationality, but fluent Spanish and extensive experience. Inexpensive hourly rates. Confidentiality guaranteed. Call Toni to discuss your requirements. 952557733 / 606010580

KENNELS AND CATTERY wwagtails boarding kennels for cats and dogs. Dogs walked 3 times a day in 36,000 sq metres fenced land. Phone Val 655 579 792 or Richard 645 659 935 or wThe Dog house While you are away on holiday or a weekend break, your dogs live in our house alongside our dog. Large play area, lots of country walks. Pet collection/del. service. Vet services on call. Gourmet meals if required. 'Only the best for your pal'. Ring: Phil 649 079 321 Comares/Benamargosa. Ex cat & dog airlines.UK. Recommended. Refs available. whome From home Dog Boarding at my 10,000m2 finca in Riogordo. No kennels just lots of excercise, fun and cuddles. Call: 678 189 019 or e-mail: Also within 15km daily home visits for dogs, cats, horses.

wVillas to Let Privately owned luxury villas to let. 627820669 958364016



wCarmen Silvia, Solicitors Abogados, Spanish solicitors, English Spoken, Torrox Costa, Urb. Costa del Oro local 8, (very near Nota-ria Office). Free initial consultation, 952 967 004 Email:

walcaucín horse riding, Lessons, trekking kids club on Sat 10am start. Ring Charlotte for more info. 620 609 374. Website:

To advertise call 664 210 468 or email


Business Listing LAWYERS (cont) winternational Law Solutions. English speaking Spanish Lawyer. English and Spanish legal advisors. Urb Torrox Park, Zona Comercial 3, tel/fax: 952 527 831 or 615 338 075, Email:

Toilet Aids, Stair Lifts, Long term rentals, Best prices on the Costa. Quality Service. Contact Gary Or Sara 952967015 / 635445279


wLocksmith - All types of locks supplied and fitted. Also Rejas supplied & fitted to your requirments. Call Sid on 658 347463 for a quick & reliable service

wguarderia/Nursery Torre Montessori, an English nursery with Spanish as second language. High adult/child ratios. Open Monday to Friday. Full and Part Time places available. Address: Calle Laureano Casquero s/n Torre del Mar. TL: 633 637 774 Email:




wSaxon SL JCB Digger Hire. New machine Good rates. Velez Malaga Call: 678 23 22 53 or 662 39 83 72

MAINTENANCE wMaintenance person experienced in plumbing, tiling, painting and general maintenance of buildings. Portfolio of previous work carried out available. Friendly, reliable and reasonable rates. No job to small. Los Romanes and surrounding area. Tel: 618 496 266 or email:

MARKET GOODS wMr Clutter Wants your Goods, House and garage clearances, shops and bars - old stock, any item considered. Call David: 686 375 089 - or if preferred email a list to Cash available and efficient service, Now buying Antiques,Gold & Jewellery

MEDICAL CENTRES wDr. Bernadette Veeger General Medicine 952 532 065, 617 913 196. Consultations by appointment and house visits. English, Español, Deutsch, Francais, Nederlands. Centro Mar y Salud, Paseo Marítimo, El Morche/Torrox Costa,

METALWORK wSteelwork, stainless steel, staircases, balustrades, gates, grills, repairings, etc. Call for a free quote 606 656 008

MOBILITY PRODUCTS wBlue Badge Mobility.S.L Hire & Sales of Mobility Scooters, Wheelchairs, Bathroom aids,

wheiko Stumbeck, Avda Andalucia 119, Torre del Mar, 952 967 923 and C/Antonio Ferrandiz "Chanquete" 23-25, Nerja, 952 528 395. C/Jacinto, Benavente Edf. No. 6, Fuengirola, 952 197 565

OUTSIDE CATERERS wPig n Mix hog roast available for all occasions.Machine rental only or we cater for you. For prices / email: or Tel 655137483

PAINTERS wPainting, Decorating and General Property Maintenance Tel: 630 842 978

PET COURIERS wPet Taxi- UK, France & Spain Delivered door to door. Call: 667 235 205


CALL: 664 210 468 Email:


Please mention The Sentinella when responding to adverts

Business Listing PHYSIOTHERAPY


wSanne h. Mortensen, BSc (Hons), MCSP, SRP, Spanish registered, Col no 2066. Clinic appointments or home visits in the Axarqùia region. Experienced UK trained physiotherapist offering post-operative rehabilitation and general musculo-skeletal conditions. 626 152 756 wEnglish Plasterer - good rates. Call Nigel 620 256 092 wStockton Plastering and Damp Services Time served plasterer 30 years experience in all aspects of plastering and damp proofing. Insurance approved and fully legal. Call 648 243 656 for a no obligation quotation or visit

w2Js removals Ltd, House Clearances, UKSpain-UK, Local and International removals, Reliable service, free quotes, no job too small. Fully insured. Call: June or John 649 662 012 / 618 846 868 Email: wUk-Spain-Uk removals. Complete van loads or just 1 item. We are in the UK every 2 weeks. Pay for just 1 way. Nerja Sofas 608091660 or 951247240 wC&D removals, Local and International, 2 men, 1 van, 20€ p/hr. Call: 622 222 361 wMan with a Van, 7.5 tonne capacity, Ikea collections and fitting long and short haul, also roofing and decorating services. Call Steve 633 337 619 email



wJohn Folland Plumbing & heating: All jobs from a dripping tap to fully fitted kitchens/bathrooms. No call out charge. Tel John: 622 050 803 or 622 180 606 wJust Plumbing. Just a quick and reliable plumbing service. Just a reasonably priced local business. Just polite, prompt and tidy. Just phone Dave on 689 647 849. Discounts in Riogordo, Colmenar, Comares. wSur integral Plumbing and Electrical Services Domestic & Commercial plumbing & electrical Call: 666 715 215

wTaj Mahal (Torre del Mar ) Avda. Anadalucia, Blq. Jupiter, Pasaje Timon 2, C/Timon. Tel: 952 547 798 wTaj Mahal (Puente don Manuel) Next door to Chiringuito Antonios, Venta Baja Tel: 952 510 886 or 667 934 731 wTaj Mahal (Torrox Costa) Ctra Vacional - 340 next to Post Office. 952 534 972 / 634 051 635 wrestaurant Caribe, Bloque 7, Local 13, Costa del Oro, Torrox Costa. Tlf: 952 530 831 wLight of india Torrox’s original Indian restaurant Tel: 951 239 670 / 677 334 721




wBusiness Cards double sided from 135€ for 500. Flyers double sided full colour from 150€ for 1,000. Call: 664 210 468

PROPERTY & POOL CARE wExperienced, professional and reliable all year service. Caring for your Property, Pool and People. References available on request. Call Ron: 637 995 088,

PROPERTY RENTALS wBuy a home Spain/rent a home Spain, Avenida Andalucia, 135, Torre del Mar. Call: 952 547 554 or 680 210 414. Email: Website:


To advertise call 664 210 468 or email


Business Listing SATELLITE T.V. wTotal Satellite installations Call Phil on: 629 556 266. wSky Shop Torre del Mar. Call: 667 235 205 or 952 541 147 wSat. Co. Freesat HD & Sky Digital, dishes, alignments, installations. We also sell HD TVs. Call TOM 7 days a week for service. 657 484 853. All equipment delivered, installed & guaranteed for 2 years. Free demos every Sat. 2pm


Tattoo removal as well as a range of La Cure bauty products. Tel: 634 348 179/672 583 776, Email: or visit our website

WEB DESIGNERS wSpanglish webs, Web designs, Database Programmes, Hosting, Domains, Real Estate Sites, English – Spanish Translation. All at realistic prices. Call Rachel: 951 708 454 or 691 660 187 Website: Email:


wredhouse Signmakers. Suppliers and designers of all types of signs - shops, pavement boards, estate agency for sale boards, vehicle advertising, banner stands and more. New telephone number: 675 091 982. Email Website:

wwater well: drilling for water supply and irrigation Plumbing and electrical installation, legalisation, water works construction/repairing. Call us: 666 13 88 86, or e-mail: free consultation.



wSolar Solutions, Sales & Servicing. We cover solar hot water, solar electricity (PV), Solar (PV) windmills, Solar pool heating and Pellet central heating systems. For more info visiti Trapiche market every Tuesday or call Andrew 660 597 894 - Spanish and English spoken. Email:

w Mobile service itv legal Solar reflective tint for glass curtains, balconies, yachts stop fading, heat ,glare, save money on cooling make living in the sun comfortable. 958 496 571-644 546 176

SOLICITORS wC&D Solicitors Specialists in Real Estate, Civil and Tax Law. Tel: 952 532 582 or wDel Prado & Partners, specialists in many areas of Spanish Law. Call: 952 52 72 74 / 952 52 17 47

SPAS & SAUNAS wTime Out Spas & Saunas. Serving The Costa del Sol for more than 10 Years. Hundreds of Spas Installed! We service all Brands of Spas so come to us - we are the Professionals. 952 52 43 94

Advertise here from just 5€ a month (based on 12 months) 3 months - 30 euros 6 months - 40 euros 12 months - 60 euros


Call: 664 210 468

wOxford Skin Clinics offering specialist treatments including, Lipo by Laser and Non Laser


“The Cool Dude”

The coolest man on the Costa!!! Doing his utmost to keep you cool and warm

“The Cool H OT Dude” Hotties are the leading microwave heated hot water bottle. Safe and easy to use, Hotties are ultra convenient to use, with only a couple of minutes heating in the microwave, whilst staying warm for hours KEEP WARM THIS WINTER!

Instant Hand Warmers

Just open the packet, expose to air and have lovely warm heat for up to 20 hours! Just 1€ each for 5 for 4€ ‘The Cool Dude’ can be seen at the following Markets: Trapiche on Tuesdays & Puente don Manuel on Fridays Alternatively call: 664 689 138 or email: FREE delivery in the Axarquia region

Avda. Andalucia, 125-A, Torre del Mar Tel: 952 547 601 / 649 123 068 Avda. Andalucia, 64 (near ‘Las Yucas’), Torre del Mar Tel: 952 965 724

Canillas de aceituno - ref.: 3035

This magnificent Villa (178m2), built in high quality with fantastic views to the Lake Viñuela, to the mountains and to the Mediterranean sea is located near the beautiful Andalusian village of Canillas de Aceituno. The former Moorish village is located on the slopes of the Sierra Tejeda in the north of the Axarquia, and a popular hiking destination with shops, bars & restaurants. The connection to Malaga is also comfortable, only 45-60 minutes away. Beautifully nestled on a large plot of land 7,000m2, the villa is situated on top of the wonderful nature area and from the various large terraces it offers unique panoramic views. Completely renovated and in great condition, the furnished villa also provides comfort: 2 beds, 2 baths, a large living room with fire place and spectacular panoramic-windows, double glazing and marble heating, A/C warm-cold and also a large open fully fitted kitchen. Likewise, the enormously large garage with lots of room is another plus point for this excellent property.

Price: reduced by 125,000€ at only


safari Lounge wE iNViTE YOU TO OUr wE iNViTE YOU TO OUr NEw YEar’S EVE ParTY:

Large buffet with drinks (wine, beer, soft drinks, sparkLing wine), party goodie bag & Live music 60€ per person reservations: 952 54 13 43 the restaurant and the terrace are heated ! Paseo de Larios, 38 (on corner at beach end) Torre del Mar Tel: 952 541 343 / 606 852 412

TOrrE OFFiCE Calle Playa Marina, 2D Torre del Mar. 29740 Tel: 952 54 71 31 Mob: 606 087 362 NErJa OFFiCE Calle El Barrio, 11 Nerja. 29780 Tel: 952 52 41 40 Mob: 637 278 306

TORROx / COMPETA FP0841 A modern, three bedroom villa of 110m2 finished in a rustic style with 20m2 garage set midway between Torrox and Competa with easy access and enjoying marvellous views to the mountains 275,000€ NERJA

FP0667 A large, bright & airy, 1 bed apartment in San Juan de Capistrano with private garden within a short walking distance to communal pool, shops and restaurants rEDUCED TO 95,000€ MeRRY CHRiSTMAS & A PROSPeROuS New YeAR TO ALL OuR FRieNDS & CLieNTS

The Sentinella Axarquia December 2011  

The little mag that fits in your bag for info on the go

The Sentinella Axarquia December 2011  

The little mag that fits in your bag for info on the go