May 13-19 2013 Issue 1550 tntmagazine.com
RETRO IS, LIKE, SO HOT RIGHT NOW! RIDING THE LIGHTNING Wales’ 100mph zip wire tested!
THE CAPITAL AFTER DARK Our picks from Museums at Night
CHEAP EURO BEACH HOLS
TICKETS TO A MEGA CLUBBING WEEKEND AT EAST LONDON WAREHOUSE!
Paradise is a 3-hour plane ride away ...
N O D N O L E G VINTA style y b s t a G t a e r g up in G in s s e r d d n a ncing Drinking, da
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EDITOR’S LETTER It’s easy to hear the word ‘vintage’ and want to smack whichever skinny-jeaned, tassled-loafered douche said it, but thanks to visionary director Baz Luhrmann’s The Great Gatsby, hitting cinemas this week, everyone’s got a soft spot for old-school glamour at the moment. See our guide to getting all dressed up and hitting the town in retro style on P24. Elsewhere, we try out the northern hemisphere’s longest zip wire. See all the action on P52.
THIS WEEK LONDONDIARY
DRINK & EATS @TNT
CHATROOM BOB MOULD
NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM
London’s most intriguing collections open for a series of awesome after-dark events
VINTAGE IN VOGUE
Inspired by Aussie Baz’s Great Gatsby, we explore the city’s fab fad for all that’s retro
FIT LIKE FONDA
Check out all the old-school workouts that never went out of style, and work a treat
TNT takes on the northern hemisphere’s longest zip line in Snowdonia, Wales
BORNEO TO BE WILD
Photos: Bazmark Film; Joshua Sofaer; Getty
CLASSIFIEDS DESPERATELY SEEKING
LIFE ON MARS
A Dutch company offered a one-way trip to the planet and 78,000 people signed up
FLYING AT 100MPH
Threatened sun bears are getting helped back into the wild by volunteers like you
Editorial Group editor Carol Driver Editor Laura Chubb Content editors: Sub/ Sport Michael Gadd Travel Helen Elfer Entertainment Alasdair Morton Web Oliver Jones Social media Dan Thorne Contributors Daisy Carrington Design and production Head of design and production Jon Cooke Design / picture editor Patricia Montenegro
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Aussie portrait: now this one’s goin’ straight to the pool room
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Shhh... SECRET LONDON The Castle quote along Hammersmith
The boys from Bogan Bingo bring you a screening of legendary cult classic The Castle, with this booze-fuelled, mid-afternoon showing of the movie based on the simple, interactive idea of getting all tanked up and quoting along as loudly, raucously and – hopefully – accurately as possible to the Kerrigans’ tale of family life. The dress code is strictly ‘Kerrigan chic’, too, so don your best daggy sweater and mullet-up – there will be prizes for the most authentic. The after party’s up the road at The Distillers, with Bogan DJs. £8
Sat, May 18. 2.30pm Riverside Studios Cinema, 1 Crisp Road, W6 9RL
All thieves of TNT bins will be prosecuted.
regent’s park open air theatre
The first of four productions this summer at the famous Open Air Theatre in north London starts this weekend with American actor Robert Sean Leonard (House) starring as immovably moral Atticus Finch in Harper Lee’s literary classic To Kill A Mockingbird. Pride And Prejudice, The Winter’s Tale and The Sound Of Music are next in line.
This weekly night takes the pub quiz – teams convened around pints, picture rounds and current affairs trivia to baffle you – and gives it a camp twist. Comedy Camp’s Simon Happily is host for the evening, and encourages everyone to grass up any mobile-aided quiz cheats. You’ve been warned – no Googling will be tolerated!
The Southbank Centre hosts this three-month fest dedicated to the written word. There will be talks about famous authors including Thomas Hardy and Jane Austen, and contemporary writers Audrey Niffenegger (The Time Traveller’s Wife) and Lionel Shriver (We Need To Talk About Kevin) are set to wax lyrical about their work.
May 16-June 15, 7.45pm NW1 4NU Camden Town openairtheatre.com
Wednesdays, 8pm WC2H 0NE Leicester Square manbarsoho.com
May 20-Sep 8, times vary SE1 8XX Waterloo southbankcentre.co.uk
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Believe In Me: Eighties icon Bonnie Tyler’s hope for a UK Euro triumph
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eurovision at roxy Borough
For the under-a-rock dwellers, Eurovision is a continentwide evening of Euro-pop trash in which political voting regularly sees the UK walk away with ‘nil points’. The cinemabar is screening the whole night on a four-metre wide screen, with cocktails and fancy dress to get you in the mood as Brit entry Bonnie Tyler (above, in front of a waxwork of Euro legends Abba) goes for gold. Drinking game rules: every time you see an overly enthusiastic Euro-fan with face paint, down a shot! £2
May 18, 6.30pm (Eurovision finals start at 8pm) 128-132 Borough High St, SE1 1LB Borough
pink lion cuddles: rugby all dayer a vampire tale Parsons Green and the adjacent White Horse pub, which becomes The Pink Lion today, go rugby crazy to celebrate the Lions’ tour Down Under. There will be rugby quizzes, Phil Vickery cooking kangaroo burgers and Matt Dawson hosting touch rugby, with five members of the current Lions squad popping along, too.
This vampire play from debut playwright Joseph Wilde was inspired by the London Riots of two years ago and tells of a co-dependent relationship between two neck-biting siblings. Punk in spirit, anti-consumerist and society-critiquing in theme and highly original in execution, Wilde is clearly a talent to watch.
May 18, 12pm-11pm SW6 4UL Parsons Green pinkunbuttoned.com
May 14-June 1, Tue-Sat, 8pm Ovalhouse, SE11 5SW Oval ovalhouse.com
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LONDON STREET SIGNS ARE JUST BACKWARDS It appears there’s a global shortage of literate sign writers at the moment, after residents in Islington woke to find new signs that spelled their street name backwards (check out NZ’s rude signage issues on P36). Folks living in Muriel Street in Barnsbury found themselves suddenly on Leirum Street last week. The Barnsbury Estate’s Tenant Management Organisation later revealed it had actually requested the name change to make things less confusing for emergency services and visitors, as the street is divided into three separate roads. Bonkers.
It involves [taking] treated effluent from a sewage works [and returning it to] a river at a higher than usual quality A leaked document from Thames Water revealing that Londoners could end up drinking recycled sewage to tackle the city’s looming water shortage
LONE RENTERS MUST EARN AT LEAST £38K Want to rent a flat all of your own? Londoners not keen on sharing need to earn at least £38,000 to afford an average one-bedroom. Website Rentonomy discovered the depressing figures, saying: “Even some of the best paid young people in London cannot rent a one-bed by themselves.”
ON THE TUBE THIS WEEKEND’S CLOSURES/WORKS
DISTRICT: No service between West Kensington, Ealing Broadway and Richmond all weekend. Replacement buses operate.
PICCADILLY: No service between
Barons Court, Northfields and Uxbridge all weekend. Replacement buses operate.
Oz rules Chelsea Flower Show Australian garden to be toured by the Queen, high hopes for win
A group of Australian gardeners has high hopes for winning the top prize at the prestigious Chelsea Flower Show, beginning May 21, and have impressed enough to ensure that the Queen requested their efforts be included in her tour of the event. It is the ninth, and final, entry since 2004 for the Victorian team backed by Fleming’s Nurseries. And they’ve decided to go out with a bang, promising an ambitious AU$2m display combining elements of Australian nature. “This is completely different to anything ever showcased here at Chelsea,” Phillip Johnson, the designer of the garden, told AAP. “We’re going for it. We’re trying to achieve the highest award Australia’s never won, the Best in Show.”
Event organisers at the Royal Horticultural Society were so taken by Johnson’s design, they allocated the Australian team its largest and most prominent position within the showgrounds yet. The design features a lush desert gorge with huge boulders, a native wildflower meadow, a natural billabong and waterfalls using recycled water from nearby buildings. The piece de resistance is the “waratah studio”, which towers over the garden and features a viewing area designed specifically for the Queen’s eye height. Lucky Her Maj. “The [show] is regarded as the Olympics of horticulture, landscape design and landscape architecture,” Johnson said. “So there’s a little bit of pressure.”
THIS WEEK IN LONDON... Like ice cream? Would like a career in social media? You mightn’t be immediately seeing the link, but they make a match at Rich Mix in Bethnal Green this Tuesday. Ice cream giants Ben & Jerry’s ‘Sundae School’ will be serving up expert advice and networking opportunities for those looking to get into a digital profession, along with a few cold scoops. The event, ‘Digital Heroes’, focuses on ethical entrepreneurship, and features lastminute.com founder Martha Lane Fox speaking about starting up and her own expertise (she’s a social media guru, too). Best of all, the evening is completely free. Starts 7pm, but you’ll need a ticket first and spaces are limited. Check availability at seetickets.com. Also see richmix.org.uk.
The Queen at the Chelsea Flower Show: one loves it
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Going underground: a night of tunes under the Thames
After dark secrets London’s museums come alive this weekend with a spectacular series of spooky and spunky nocturnal events Words alasdair morton Picture the scene: you’ve just taken a tour round one of the most ornate royal homes in the country, Hampton Court Palace, learning about Henry VIII’s wife-collecting history and King Charles II’s naughty night-time habits, before the gates to the grounds close, the public are shepherded out and you become one of a select few to enjoy the palace’s very first ‘sleepover’. This one-off experience will show you what it would have been like to live in the 16th-century palace, and is just one of the outstanding events being held as part of this year’s Museums At Night series. Museums across the country are opening their doors after hours this weekend (May 16-18), with inventive – and drink-accompanied – events taking you beyond the usual ‘look, read and learn’ mantra. Hampton Court’s Sleep Like A King is one such event. Its Salacious Gossip tour first unveils what really went on once lights went out. “You’ll hear the risqué adult stories of the Stuart and Hanoverian courts we daren’t tell during day time,” palace spokeswoman Katrina Whenham tells TNT. There’ll 8
also be a ghost tour exploring the spooks that haunt this historical abode (wife-killer Henry VIII’s jilted spouses may well feature) before you settle in. At 9pm, the palace takes on a new life as the gates close. “It’s a completely different atmosphere when you cross a grand Tudor courtyard at night or stand in the cloisters,” Whenham says. You’ll then bed down in The Undercroft, Henry VIII’s beer cellar, and wake to a hearty breakfast in The Privy Kitchen. But this first-of-a-kind event is just part of the weekend’s night roster. The 170-year-old Brunel Museum, home to the first under-river tunnel anywhere in the world, is hosting two days of performance in its underground amphitheatre in the Thames Tunnel, plus there’s a secret rooftop garden serving cocktails mixed with herbs and flowers plucked from the foliage. Called the Midnight Apothecary, the rooftop garden bar hosts its first birthday bash on May 18. “You’ll be able to relax on deck chairs around a fire pit with exquisite drinks,” museum director Robert Hulse says of celebrations that will feature
Rhubarbra Streisand cocktails, plus wood pigeon breast burgers courtesy of wild food experts The Foragers. “You can cuddle up, watch the sun set over the river and toast marshmallows,” he adds. A show by Irish harpist Áine O’Dwyer takes place in the Thames Tunnel the previous evening (May 17), marking the 186th anniversary of the 1828 flood in the underground chamber which claimed the lives of six miners who were in the midst of building what is the world’s oldest Tube tunnel. “The acoustics are extraordinary,” Hulse says. “Áine will play a beautiful but haunting programme as you imagine the water rising and surging as it did in 1828.” Turn over for a stack more events that will change the way you look at museums for good. BEST OF MUSEUMS AT NIGHT ›› Sleep Like A King. May 17. £100 KT8 9AU Hampton Court. Brunel Museum: Aine O’Dwyer. May 17. £10 SE16 4LF Rotherhithe culture24.org.uk
MORE LONDON AFTER HOURS tntmagazine.com/late-night-london
Open air: Brunel Museum has a secret rooftop bar
Regal recline: one of Hampton Court’s boudoirs
Henry’s in: the entrance to the Tudor king’s riverside residence
1940s relived: from the home front to the front line weybridge, surrey
vintage pop and beats walthamstow
It’s all vintage style and swing at this Forties-themed party. The Swingtime Dance Company will be on hand to teach you the moves, too, if you don’t think you have them nailed beforehand. There’ll also be a Forties cinema, vintage cars and the Red Hot ukulele duo, too.
Music, art, dance and fashion from the decade that gave Austin Powers his mojo, the Swinging Sixties, is the focus here. Dance troupe The Actionettes, as seen in the Brit flick Made In Dagenham, will perform alongside David Bailey’s East End Faces exhibition. Sixties dress is welcomed at this night of vintage culture and couture.
a nose euston square The Wellcome Collection is putting on a special, nose-themed night with a plastic surgeon chatting nose jobs, a nose flute lesson with Ansuman Biswas, a collection of false noses from artist Joshua Sofaer, and nose surgeon Simon Gane explaining how your schnozz works. There will also be a look at the most impressive and famous noses in art history. Not to be sniffed at! FREE
May 17, 7pm-11pm 183 Euston Road, NW1 2BE wellcomecollection.org
mystic bedlam: spiritualists and spook-spotters south london The Bethlem Royal Hospital – formerly the Bedlam Hospital – opens its doors after hours for a look through the history of it and psychiatry. The oldest psych hospital in the world, Bedlam opened in 1247 and has been at the forefront of prevailing medical thought and treatment ever since. Artefacts from its seven and a half centuries will be on display, and a 5pm talk by the archive head will give a history of the hospital, with Dr Sarah Chaney looking at 19th-century hypnosis and the Bethlem’s role in research and groundbreaking psychiatry. Thought-provoking. May 16, 5pm-7.30pm Eden Beckenham, BR3 3BX Park bethlemheritage.org.uk
May 18, 5pm-12am Weybridge KT13 0QN brooklandsmuseum.com
May 16, 6.30pm-10.30pm William Morris Gallery, E17 4PP Walthamstow Central wmgallery.org.uk
carshalton water tower and gardens tour surrey This stunning grade II-listed building in south London opens its doors for Museums At Night. You’ll be able to see the orangery, the saloon and the awe-inspiring pump chamber at this 18th-century industrial monolith, with special guided tours taking place. £3
Sci-fi movie night greenwich Screening of scifi movie classic Invasion Of The Body Snatchers, with a special talk about the social and scientific influences behind the movie. Creepy. £7
May 16, 6.45pm-8.45pm Royal Observatory, SE10 9NF Greenwich rmg.co.uk
horniman garden party forest hill
the enchanted museum chalfont st giles
The Bank of England Museum’s displays of notes, past and present, will all be out, with staff on hand to tell you all you ever wanted to know about gold.
The Chiltern Open Air Museum will light up its historic buildings and setting with lanterns – with a behind the scenes candlelight tour at 9.30pm – and will serve spiced apple cider on the adjacent village green. Properly quaint and English. It’s two-for-theprice-of-one, as well.
This south London museum (above) and gardens are a treat that’s not widely enough known. It gets in on the night-time activities with music performances, poetry recitals, film screenings and a special art installation from rAndom International, the clever folks who stunned London with their recent Rain Room at the Barbican. Not to mention grub in the garden. Sublime.
May 17, 5.30pm-9pm EC2R 8AH Bank bankofengland.co.uk/museum
May 18, 7pm-11am Gorelands Lane, HP8 4AB Rickmansworth coam.org.uk
May 15, 6pm-9pm Horniman Museum, SE23 3PQ Forest Hill horniman.ac.uk
May 18, 7pm-9pm Carshalton SM5 3PN carshaltonwatertower.co.uk
banknotes and bullion city of london £5
friday late: brightest london covent garden
elvis has left the building islington
This after hours shindig combines two of the capital’s ongoing events – the London Transport Museum’s Poster Art 150 exhibition and a taste of Kew Gardens’ edible festival. So you can grab some eccentric amusebouche and sup on a creation from the evening’s botanical mixologist while you ponder over the changing face of poster art on London’s iconic Tube. What a trip.
Islington Museum takes you on a rock ‘n’ roll journey through elements of the borough’s past not normally found in the history books. This one-off event looks at what went on behind the scenes of former nightclub and London hotspot The Rainbow Theatre (which played host to gigs from AC/DC, The Jacksons, Bob Marley, Elvis Presley, of course, and many more).
May 17, 6.45pm-10pm London Transport Museum, WC2E 7BB Covent Garden ltmuseum.co.uk
cockles and mussels east end Fish and chips – quintessentially English grub, right? Wrong. Actually it’s a combination of French pommes frites and Portuguese Jews’ battering fish to use surplus catches. Urban sociologist Dr Alex Rhys-Taylor will reveal more fascinating food facts about London’s culinary history in talk ‘Taste, Class And The History Of British Seafood’ with pop-up fish restaurants on hand, too. £7
May 17, 6pm-8pm 245 St John Street, EC1V 4NB Angel islington.gov.uk
May 18, 7pm-9.30pm Museum of London Docklands, E14 4AL Westferry museumoflondon.org.uk
the dambusters edgware
The Museum of London’s medieval archive of artefacts and objects are brought to life in a wholly unique way this evening, as sketch comedy troupe Breaking And Entering will write and perform a brand new street theatre show, as well as sketches and comedy songs, all inspired by the archive of ancient times.
The RAF Museum has been celebrating the 70th anniversary of the famous 617 Squadron’s Dambusters raids in the Second World War which proved integral to the Allied efforts against the Nazis. The hangars, including Bomber Hall, will be open with the anniversary exhibition telling all there is to know about the raid and the people who carried it out. The original copy of wing commander and raid leader Guy Gibson’s book Enemy Coast Ahead is one of the most treasured items on display. The curatorial team will answer questions and there’s a mini-lecture for the die-hards on how bombing developed between WWI and WWII, making this assault possible.
May 17, 6.30pm-9pm Museum of London, London Wall, EC2Y 5HN Barbican museumoflondon.org.uk
May 17, 6.30pm-10.30pm Royal Air Force Museum, NW9 5LL Colindale rafmuseum.org/london
archaeological archive by twilight city of london
Photos: Getty; Museum of London
surgery by gaslight and other medical tales london bridge Imagine what it would have been like in the 19th century when operations were carried out by the aforementioned light source. Three shows this evening will demonstrate just that. Terrifying stuff. £6.20
after hours at charles darwin’s house downe, kent
There are more insects in one square mile of rural land than people in the whole world, but who is the real pest? This event decides.
Pop round for a look about the house and home of the man who, inadvertently, killed god in the 19th century. Darwin proposed the theory of evolution (over intelligent design) and stunned the religion-ruled world. This after hours event takes you into where the famed beardy man lived, with talks about his work, its impact upon society and the conflict it caused Darwin himself and his family.
May 16, 7pm-8.30pm Wellcome Collection, NW1 2BE Euston Square wellcomecollection.org
May 18, 6pm-8pm Down House, BR6 7JT Chelsfield english-heritage.org.uk
May 17, 6pm, 7pm & 8pm Old Operating Theatre, SER1 9RY London Bridge thegarret.org.uk
insects vs humans euston square FREE
THE CANDLELIGHT CLUB
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Flappers: dress up and get down at TCC
BAR THE SCENE Vintage is bigger than ever this summer thanks to the long-awaited release of Baz Luhrmann’s The Great Gatsby – good news for The Candlelight Club, which pops up at secret venues across London in speakeasy style, inviting revellers to dress up in their best Roaring Twenties garb and Charleston to retro tunes and live jazz bands. So far, so standard hipster, but the Club’s real USP is in the name. Wherever it sets up, the venue is “entirely lit by candles”. Well, this is what they tell us, but when TNT visited in April, the vibe was a little compromised by a number of neon ‘emergency exit’ signs. Woops. Still, everyone in attendance had put maximum effort into their get-up, bringing the desired ambience with them. THE GRUB Menus change depending on the evening’s theme (they’ve just done a The Great Gatsby duo of events, and next up is ‘A Night In Old Havana’ on May 31 and June 1). Starters from £5, mains from £15, desserts from £5.
A different cocktail list accompanies each new theme. Our visit (‘A New York Speakeasy Crawl’) was blurred by obscenely whisky-heavy Manhattans. BILL PLEASE Cocktails from about £7.50, plus there’s a £15.75 entrance fee. VERDICT The concept sounded better than what The Candlelight Club managed to pull off when TNT visited, but the surrounding groups of grinning partygoers gave us the sense that you get out of the experience what you put in. LAURA CHUBB BEHIND THE BAR
NATIONAL DINING ROOMS Knackered after slogging round The National Gallery? Recharge at this refined spot overlooking Trafalgar Square. Exciting mains include the likes of venison haunch and Marmite bacon on toast (from £15.50). peytonandbyrne.co.uk
BLUE PRINT CAFÉ Alongside the panoramic views at this gem above the Design Museum, you can get stuck into kick-ass combos such as pork chop with aubergine purée and preserved dates. Two courses for £15, three for £20. blueprintcafe.co.uk
DINING ROOM East End contemporary art must-see the Whitechapel Gallery also serves up impressive seasonal fare – think pork belly with spiced greens, cider, chorizo and cockle cream. Hell-o. Mains from £12.50. whitechapelgallery.org
Photos: The New Sheridan Club
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Simplistic: Trullo is a true taste of Italy in Highbury
bargain bites Sweet as news, folks – Kiwi-owned cafe Long White Cloud, which has been educating east Londoners’ palates on Hackney Road one proper coffee at a time – is now open for evening meals. There are pie nights, Mexican nights and burger nights every week, with all mains coming in at under £10 and all food free range, fair trade and locally sourced. Hankering for a taste of home? Long White Cloud stocks the likes of Jet Planes, Giant Toasties and L&P, too. longwhitecloudhoxton.com
street eats indoors Islington pub The Lexington has come up with the perfect solution for the particularly lazy gourmand – every Saturday until July 13, the Lexington Kitchen Project brings the best of London’s street food off the tarmac and into its cosy surrounds, so you can taste the toast of the city’s scene with the added bonus of a comfy seat. This weekend sees twice-fried chicken from Mother Clucker, and Luardos Mexican the weekend after. Other treats lined up include Tongue N Cheek, Butty Man and tapas from Donostia Social Club. thelexington.co.uk
green and gold Aussie Prue Freeman has found a permanent home for her high-quality coffee, healthy homemade food and gourmet frozen yoghurt crusade, Daisy Green, in Portman Village just off Oxford Street. A response to her shock that in London, “Starbucks was the accepted and Nero the gourmet”, you can expect uncomplicated and organic “homemade Aussie delights”.
Picture this: you’re wandering along the winding cobbled streets of a quaint Italian town on a balmy summer’s evening, when you happen upon a traditional trattoria. Well, Trullo isn’t quite that, it’s on the busy St Paul’s Road in Highbury, but it’s almost how you feel once you get inside. Its decor is simplistic, with dark-wooden flooring, chairs and tables contrasting with brilliant-white tablecloths. There’s low-hung lighting creating a warm ambience as well as huge windows looking out on to the busy street outside. With no more than 15 tables (there’s also a small dining area downstairs for when it’s busy), it’s a cosy affair, with aromas from freshly made food wafting from the open kitchen. The grub The menu changes daily, focusing on Italian-inspired, seasonal cuisine. The pasta is fresh, rolled minutes before being served to your table, while the meats and fish are cooked over burning coals. To start, I order a bowl of chunky, slimy tagliatelle with violetta artichokes and Amalfi lemon. It’s impossible not to eat the lot, despite it being enough for a main. My dinner guest’s glossylooking pappardelle with beef shin ragu is equally impressive. Next up is burrata, Castelluccio lentils, agretti and spicy tomato sauce. There’s no tiny a la carte portions here. No fancy swirls on the plate. It’s all about the food; creamy, melt-inthe-mouth soft mozzarella, with lentils cooked in a tangy-rich tomato sauce. My meat-eating friend is far from complaining about his perfectly pink-in-the-middle Black Hampshire pork chop, served with baked borlotti beans and salsa verde. We finish off the evening with a dollop of faultless salted caramel ice cream. THE SCENE
An extensive list of wines from all across Italy, plus some Italianinspired cocktails (Trullo Sbagliato is Campari, quince, orange bitters and prosecco). Bill please Wines from £4.50/ £19.50 per glass/ bottle; cocktails from £8; beer from £4. Antipasti from £7.50; primi from £8; mains from £14; dessert from £4.50. verdict The food is sublime – arrive hungry. Carol Driver Behind the bar
daisygreenfood.com 300-302 St Paul’s Road, N1 2LH
Highbury & Islington
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LETTER OF THE WEEK
Re: Brits abroad are an embarrassment (TNT 1549): Most nationalities have a minority who don’t know how to behave in public. In my travels I’ve met far more nice, intelligent, caring Brits than I have “dicks”. Having said that, I don’t stay in all-inclusive hotels in Ibiza. But this isn’t uniquely British. Have you seen Australians at Surfers Paradise in the holidays? “Dicks” everywhere! Just don’t go where “dicks” are.
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SO Alex Ferguson retirES. Nice to see news about a man in his seventies that doesn’t involve child abuse
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Fergie’s gonna help stephen hawking redo brief history of time – he’ll add an extra 79 seconds
I’M STARTING A POLITICAL PARTY FOR CHEAP CD LOVERS - IT’S CALLED USKIP
MY GIRLFRIEND SAID SHE WANTED OUR LOVE TO BE LIKE ROMEO AND JULIET. I SAID ME TOO, WITHOUT THE KILLING OUrSELVES BIT
River Island’s selling ‘Distressed Denim’ – When life gives you lemons
I LIKE TO TAG MYSELF IN FACEBOOK PHOTOS MY FRIENDS CAN BARELY SEE ME IN – THEY SAY, ‘YOU’RE RUINING THE FUN, WALLY’
I dropped some fruit into a bass speaker. It was sub-lime
Microsoft’s newbie is “Xbox Infinity”. If Sony call the next Ps5 the “Infinity +1 no returns”, they win the console wars
Re: ‘Dutch roundabouts’ due for testing in London (tntmagazine.com): So wrong. It works in the Netherlands because they have good drivers. Drop a few of these roundabouts in the UK and you will see lots of dead cyclists. Stopping cars leaving roundabouts will choke up the system. Visibility of cyclists is not improved. It’s like cycling on a pavement alongside a main road, and expecting cars turning left to give way – they don’t! Eric Drummond, via tntmagazine.com
Re: Worst places to live in London (TNT 1548): This is rubbish. Anywhere sucks to live if you can’t afford to pay your rent and you’re unemployed. I live on the border of Tower Hamlets and Hackney and love it. It’s well connected to all other parts of London, has great nightlife, cultural activities, libraries, retail/
shopping, beautiful areas (Victoria Park? Regent’s Canal? Broadway Market? Mile End park? Tower Hamlets Cemetery?) and it was the centre of the Olympics. If anybody explored further than Hackney High Street or Mile End Road then they’d discover what a gem this area is. taff664, via tntmagazine.com
LIGHTS ARE OUT
Re: Brit tourists charged £54 for four Rome gelatos (tntmagazine.com): In Iceland, I paid for the northern lights tour in advance but they don’t care if the weather is terrible and you have no chance of seeing the lights – the coaches set off regardless. Lesson learned – next time, check weather forecast and the northern lights forecast before booking the tickets. Tatsumi Saiga, via Facebook BOB MOULD TRY A RETRO WORKOUT /30
Mark Bratt, via tntmagazine.com Mark wins a three-day tour of Ireland with Shamrocker shamrockeradventures.com
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streetfest london Hearn St, Shoreditch Sunday, May 5, 2013 Photos by: David Salas/ TNT More pics and tag yourself at facebook.com/tntmag
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Mail order: Ben Gibbard and Jimmy Tamborello
the postal service Brixton Academy, SW9 9SL Sun, May 19 & Mon, may 20 | Doors at 7pm | £25+
Tisno, Croatia. July 18-22. £119 soundwavecroatia.com
This Croatian beach party festival has the waves, the sun and the sand, as well as some serious tuneage to get down to. There’s fast-rising Essex lad Lapalux, face-masked name-changer Doom (below), Californian sound sampler and turntablist DJ Shadow, the truly wonderful Cinematic Orchestra, and even Craig bleedin’ Charles off of Red Dwarf spinning the funky tunes – it’s a summer music fest where the weather is guaranteed to make it as much a holiday as a fest, with boat parties to boot.
The Postal Service is Death Cab For Cutie’s Benjamin Gibbard and Dntel, aka Jimmy Tamborello, with Rilo Kiley singer Jenny Lewis. They came together for the Postal project in 2003, with Gibbard and Tamborello swapping tapes in the mail to make Give Up, an astounding album, the success of which outdid all of their respective day jobs. Then they departed. It was a one-off, no follow-up, no more shows. ‘Til now. The trio have seen fit to celebrate the 10th anniversary of Give Up by rereleasing the album with a smattering of new tracks, off-cuts and studio side bits. A perfect reason to revisit this indie-pop classic. More to the point, though, they are taking the album out on the road for a series of shows in the US (they stunned at Coachella) and here in Europe. The first show at Brixton Academy sold out in minutes, with a second selling just as strongly. They could have played a week here and still found long-faced fans walking the street outside looking for generous touts to share a ticket for less than a hundred quid. Both continued in their former bands. Gibbard’s Death Cab released four more albums and became an indie rock institution. Meanwhile, Tamborello experimented with all kinds of electronica on three following Dntel LPs and collaborated with a variety of other artists (Bright Eyes, Grizzly Bear) on remixes and other projects. It is the opening chords of singles such as Such Great Heights, Against All Odds and new track A Tattered Line Of String that people will cram into this legendary Brixton hall to hear. Not many gigs are one-offs, really. These are. Be there and enjoy. Brixton
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bob mould GIG tue, may 21. 7.30pm £19.50
Icon Mould formed Hüsker Dü in 1979 and pretty much wrote the rule book for alt-rock with their 1986 Candy Apple Grey, influencing the likes of Kurt Cobain, Billy Corgan, et al. Last year’s solo LP Silver Age saw him rocking out on guitar after years experimenting with dance beats and electronica. Living legend. See Chatroom on P21.
Photos: Getty; Autumn de Wilde
Electric Ballroom 184 Camden High Street, NW1 8QP Camden Town electricballroom.co.uk
rodigan’s ram jam
fri, may 17. 10pm-4am £5
fri, may 17. 10pm-6am £15.50
This new weekly indie night is set to play all of your indie dance floor fillers as well as bring you a load of special guest record-spinners. Birmingham’s indie upstarts Peace played the launch night two weeks back, and this week Paradise plays a live set with BEAT taking over room two.
David Rodigan curates his signature night of dub, reggae and roots music, with established acts and leading lights coming together under one roof. There’ll be the likes of Toddla T Sound, Ms Dynamite, Melé, Dub Phizix & Strategy and Bitty McClean as well as a monster headline set by the main man himself.
The Garage 20-22 Highbury Corner, N5 1RD Highbury & Islington bloodshake.net
The Forum 9-17 Highgate Road, NW5 1JY Kentish Town mamacolive.com/theforum
lana del reY
bugged out: boys noize dj set
HUNGRY KIDS OF HUNGARY
Sun, May 19 & Mon, May 20. 7pm £25+
fri, May 17. 9pm-3am £13.50
tue, may 21. 7.30pm £6
Her Fifties style, whispered vocals and bad girl nymph persona may be a bit falsified, but the result is catchy as hell and the girl known as Lizzy Grant to her ma is playing her biggest shows over here yet. Anyway, adopting a stage persona didn’t do Joanne Germanotta any harm (Lady Gaga to those not on first name terms).
Hamburg’s Boise Noize graces this east London club with a special DJ set. The German label head, DJ and producer is a techno-electro magician, warping sounds into shapes the likes of which you’ve never encountered before. A festival main stage act in a tiny venue, all sweaty, up close and personal. Special.
The boys from Brisbane have been announced as the Manic Street Preachers’ support for their Sydney and Melbourne shows in the summer. Before then, the indie rockers travel over here to smash this London show, in support of their debut long player You’re A Shadow, which was out earlier this year.
Hammersmith Apollo 45 Queen Caroline St, W6 9QH Hammersmith hammersmithapollo.net
XOYO 32-37 Cowper Street, EC2A 4AP Old Street xoyo.co.uk
Water Rats 328 Grays Inn Road, WC1X 8BZ King’s Cross themonto.com
KOOL THING The buzz so far The debut single, TV Tower, from this Berlin-based Irish/Aussie synth duo (Julie Chance and Jon Dark) is based around a thumping beat layered with swirling synths and Chance’s ghostly vocals. There’s a pop sensibility that should serve them well, with a strong club vibe, but enough edge and indie curiosity to stand out from the legions indulging fascinations with the decade that style forgot for their contemporary scene offerings. Stating your zeitgeist-y-ness in your name is bold, but they’re right. The Critics say“A new wave masterpiece” thegirlsare.com the plug TV Tower is out May 27 through Mad Dog & Love Records. Play Birthdays, May 30. £5 N16 8BJ Dalston Kingsland koolthingmusic.com
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HOW TO ENTER
Go to tntmagazine.com/competitions. See webpage for terms and conditions. Winners will be selected at random.
TICKETS TO JOSE CUERVO PRESENTS WEEKEND & A FUNKY TABLE TOP COOLER TNT Magazine has teamed up with londonwarehouseevents.co.uk to offer one lucky reader tickets to the Jose Cuervo Presents Weekend at East London Warehouse. On Friday, June 7, it’s Ibiza club night Cocoon featuring Frank Lorber, Christian Burkhardt, Ilario Allicante and K.I.F.F from 10pm to 6am. Skepta Versus Joker takes place on
Saturday, June 8, alongside P Money, Darq E Freaker and Stooki Sound. The winner will bag a pair of tickets to each event, a pair of Golden Tickets to all Cocoon events in 2013, a bottle of Jose Cuervo Gold Tequila, plus a funky table-top cooler from Jose Cuervo (worth £655 in total). Sweet. Enter at tntmagazine.com/competitions londonwarehouseevents.co.uk
PREVIOUS WINNERS ONLINE COMPETITION: TICKETS TO STREETFEST: Catherine Mandeville; Lynsey Carruthers; Catherine Short
TOUR OF IRELAND
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TRAVEL PHOTO BOOK
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The former Sugar and Hüsker Dü frontman on going solo, embracing his past, and loving Kelly Clarkson INTERVIEW alasdair morton
Looking ahead to your London show, have you always had a big fanbase here? Yeah. We came over with Sugar in the summer of 1992, ahead of Copper Blue’s release – the ULU show was one of the craziest I have ever played in my life. What prompted the return to big poprock guitars on recent LP Silver Age? In 2002, when I began releasing electronic records, people were like, ‘What’s going on?’ Since then I’ve put out three other solo albums [Body Of Song (2005); District Line (2008) and Life And Times (2009)] which were all guitar records. Age though is definitely a concentrated version of that short guitar-pop song thing. What prompted this? I began working on my autobiography, See A Little Light, in 2008, which was three years of my life during which I wrote no music. I didn’t want to write a book about writing an album. When I came back to songwriting two years ago I knew the Sugar reissues were coming and felt in the mood for loud guitar-pop. And I’d done a lot of work with Dave Grohl and the Foo Fighters [Mould was Grohl’s personally selected touring DJ in 2012 and played on their Wasting Light LP]. Was the book a cathartic process? Yeah, at the least! We all know our own life stories but the challenge was making sense of it. Going in I thought I’d tell some funny stories, put myself on the back and embarrass myself once and then be done with it all. But that covered just six months of my life. What was the most difficult aspect? Talking about my professional life was easy, talking about my personal life less so. I’ve always drawn boundaries about how much I would share [he refused to speak about his sexuality for risk of being portrayed as a ‘gay songwriter’]. Did you have to forgo those boundaries? Yeah. The rule was to tell my story and not that of those around me. I don’t like deconstructing songs but knew I’d need to. But talking about my childhood and family and my sexuality were things I had never talked about. That was the biggest stretch.
Icon: Bob (centre) is bringing his band, Jon Wurster (drums) and Jason Narducy (bass), to London What did you learn about your past? I understood my childhood better and the impact it had on my work. Growing up in a chaotic house with an alcoholic dad – music was my salvation. Jukebox singles kept me alive, and they still do to this day. When I was 18 I never thought about the music I was making – I thought I was updating The Ramones or doting over Joy Division. I didn’t see how deep it ran. You could see this hyper-vigilance as a child, never wanting things to get out of control, and it is good to have ownership of your idiosyncrasies. You are synonymous with alternative rock but have embraced electronic music – what was your wake-up call? I was born in 1960 and instinctively dialled in to Sixties American and British pop music, and then punk rock in 1976 became my starting point for making music seriously. But I remember revisiting Sixties psychedelic pop in ’83, which shifted my outlook – I then began listening to Appalachian folk music. Then in ’85 I heard [My Bloody Valentine’s] Loveless and that shifted the way I looked at music. With electronic music, I was living in New York in 1999 and being an out gay man, dance music was the soundtrack to the city and especially the gay neighbourhoods. I heard Sasha’s Xpander EP and thought, ‘Wow, this sounds like [Sugar EP] Beaster, but with machines!’ It sent me down this rabbit hole for
a number of years, learning about that music, making it and becoming a DJ, which I still do now as often as I play rock shows. Is there a reluctance for guitar fans to accept electronic music? If you look back at the Seventies, you had the hard rock and metal and disco which were at odds with each other, like mods and rockers. We had that struggle for a while and it wasn’t until the early 2000s, and mostly in Europe, that electronic and guitars started to fit together right. Bands like The Notwist or Styrofoam [had been doing it] and then The Postal Service’s Give Up in 2003 [made it] acceptable. Europe was way ahead of the US. Alkaline Trio’s Matt Skiba said he loved Kelly Clarkson’s Since You’ve Been Gone but was afraid to admit to it until talking to you... That is very true. She is the real deal. The way she came to our attention was weird, but that is a great pop song. He and I share that guilty pleasure. We all want to be cool. We sometimes think that admitting we like something for mass consumption means the corner of our ‘cool card’ will be cut off, but whatever. Music is music. Silver Age is out now through Merge Records. Plays Electric Ballroom, May 21. £19.50 NW1 8QP electricballroom.co.uk Camden Town
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Stellar: Quinto and Pine as Spock and Kirk in the outstanding sequel
star trek into darkness FILM review by Alasdair Morton Starring: Chris Pine, Zachary Quinto, Karl Urban, Simon Pegg | 12A | 127mins | Out now
the great gatsby FILM Starring: Leonardo DiCaprio, Tobey Maguire, Joel Edgerton | 12A | 147mins
A stellar cast, one of the most outlandish, extravagant directors in the movies, Baz Luhrmann, and F Scott Fitzgerald’s classic novel – what could go wrong? A six month release delay worried, but it’s crunch time now for Baz’s epic summer event movie. Fingers crossed. See our review here next week. On General release May 16
Filmmaker JJ Abrams is living the geek dream – growing up loving Stars Trek and Wars and sci-fi in general, he is now directing new installments to the very films he was weaned on. With this follow-up to his 2009 Trek reinvention, he promised bigger, bolder and more ambitious – and has delivered in spades. Into Darkness is everything that a blockbuster action spectacle should be – funny and yet with serious dramatic stakes; epic in scale and yet intimate; with pulsequickening action set pieces alongside a genuinely emotionally engaging story. Picking up after its predecessor, it pits Kirk (Chris Pine), Spock (Zachary Quinto) and the Enterprise crew against new evil one, John Harrison, an uber-smart manipulative monster prone to acts of terrorism who has a great big bone to pick with Starfleet (he’s played by the ludicrously named Benedict Cumberbatch). Double crosses ensue, Kirk cocks things up royally before learning humility and Spock’s pragmatism teaches and infuriates everyone in equal measure. Less worried about doffing its cap to the long-standing franchise than its predecessor, Darkness will delight Trekkies, but successfully reels in those to whom a Vulcan death grip and pointy ears are a nerdish preoccupation alone. It’s another brilliant retooling with witty banter and a script that moves at warp speed. From the opening sequence – where the team outrun spear-throwing tribesman Indiana Jones-style on a red grassy planet – to the climactic face-off (more intimate than you’d expect of an US$185 million movie) you’ll be enthralled. Good for: Proof that blockbusters needn’t be daft, soulless and disposable. An absolute corker.
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eddie pepitone: electrified
A balled-up rage of anger, frustration and dismay, channelled through his comedic mind, Eddie is a stand-up star. Corporate’s lack of morals, the debasing of US culture through sitcom moronity, the dismantling of the working class, and the wonder that can be found in a kitten’s purr. Philosophical, sweet and passionate. Soho Theatre 21 Dean Street, W1D 3NE. Until May 25. £10+ Tott Crt Rd sohotheatre.com
george bellows: modern american life
This is the first retrospective of US realist painter George Bellows (1882-1925) to be held in the UK and it boasts 70 works that look at American life in the 20th century. Bellows had a fascination with New York and its urban landscape, people and developments focus heavily in this wonderful exhibition.
Having snatched a Best New Opera Olivier Award for La Boheme in 2011, Aussie-born director Adam Spreadbury-Maher continues making his artform accessible with this irreverent take on Giuseppe Verdi’s A Masked Ball for OperaUpClose. It’s a fun way to enjoy opera free from the usual formality (and expense). LK
Royal Academy of Arts W1J OBD. Until June 9. £11 Piccadilly Circus royalacademy.org.uk
King’s Head Theatre Upper Street, N1 1QN. Until May 25. £10+ Angel kingsheadtheatre.com
jessie cave What’s Bookworm about? It’s about the launch of a book club called Bookworms United, but it’s not real and is kind of just me talking about books and ordering my little sister (my assistant) about. Who inspired you to take to the stage? Roseanne Barr. And for some reason, the movie Four Weddings And A Funeral. I used to do an impression of Hugh Grant. On my own. In my room.
Photos: Tristram Kenton; Mindy Tucker; Grace Harper Brighouse
What’s the best comedy show you have seen? Louis CK. Just. Love.
fast and furious 6
MERRILY WE ROLL ALONG
It’s vehicular warfare in this sixth installment in the tits ‘n’ cars going really, really fast franchise. How they got this far with a series so lacking in depth is surprising, but this new offering does deliver all the miles per hour stunts and highspeed automotive carnage you’d expect (as well as Vin Diesel, The Rock, etc) and a bunch of it was filmed in London, too.
Bittersweet, hauntingly melodic, touching and witty, this production of Stephen Sondheim’s 1981 Broadway flop – about the deteriorating 19-year-old friendship between movie producer Franklin Shepard and his collaborator – is unmissable for those wanting more from a musical than a band’s back catalogue. LK
On general release May 17
Harold Pinter Theatre Panton Street, SW1Y 4DN. Until July 27. £10+ Piccadilly Circus merrilywestend.com
Where was your first show? My first 10 minutes was a couple of Novembers ago. I forgot most of my lines so just used a tin of Vaseline as a prop. I lasted four minutes. What is the funniest thing you have ever seen? My sister’s dance show where one girl was wearing a giant candle costume that looked nothing like a giant candle. It kept wobbling as she was smiling and dancing with the whole audience laughing. Cruel but joyful. Bookworm Soho Theatre, W1D 3NE. May 17 & 18. £12.50 Tottenham Court Road sohotheatre.com
Old-school glamour: L to R, Tobey Maguire, Leonardo DiCaprio and Carey Mulligan in The Great Gatsby
Spot the difference: revellers at Londonâ€™s Prohibition Party and, right, Twenties style in the film
Baz Luhrmann’s The Great Gatsby has made vintage hot. Here’s how to drink, dance and dress up on the capital’s growing scene Words LAURA CHUBB
Playing dress up is a London nightlife essential this summer. Now that Baz Luhrmann’s much-hyped The Great Gatsby is finally set to hit cinemas (on general release May 16), it’s bringing vintage chic to the masses, with seemingly every nightspot in town falling over itself to serve up Gatsby-esque cocktails, tunes and dress codes. Blame the visionary Aussie director for his sumptuous Roaring Twenties set pieces, but the vintage look isn’t only to be the preserve of the socially obnoxious over the next few months. But don’t panic. Because, as ever, TNT is coming to the rescue. We’re going to help you out with our pick of Vintage London – the bits you can enjoy for pure old-fashioned fun, without becoming a tryhard, selfying/ Pinter(un)interesting bore. (Sorry, vintage geeks!). Some of the capital’s most inventive vintage nights out at the moment come courtesy of Bourne & Hollingsworth, which hosts the regular (and now legendary among the inthe-know) Twenties-themed Prohibition Party and Fortiesstyle Blitz Party. B&H’s Andria Stirling tells us: “When we started out there was the real hardcore vintage set at the heart of it, but now it’s people who wouldn’t usually dress in vintage clothing, who aren’t really into that lifestyle, but are just looking for more from a night out.” She reckons it’s the “opportunity to escape the humdrum of London” that has made the parties so popular, with good-time guys and girls donning their vintage togs and stepping back in time a reaction to what Stirling calls a once “incredibly dull and unimaginative nightlife scene”. “London was all plain, dingy clubs and overpriced drinks,” she says. “Now people are enjoying the opportunity to really get dressed up, put effort into an outfit and be a bit more glamorous. Londoners got sick of spending £100 every weekend on a not particularly memorable night out.” In fact, vintage is becoming such a big part of London life, Rough Guides has just released a standalone Vintage London title. There’s no avoiding it, folks. So, ready to whack on your spats and do the Charleston? Here’s a quick cheat sheet for London’s most popular vintage subcultures. Get amongst it!
1920s THE SCENE: Sexy young ladies sporting red lips, bobbed hair,
pearls and flapper dresses, dapper fellows in waistcoats and trilbies, and all-night dancing to jazz. GET INVOLVED: The frontrunners here are without doubt the Prohibition Party (prohibition1920s.com, next event June 1) and The Candlelight Club (thecandlelightclub.com, see P12 for our review). The former packs the punters into a secret
Ready to put on your spats and Charleston?
location for DJs on gramophones, jazz bands, cocktails served in tea cups and gambling tables. Want something more low-key? The Nightjar (barnightjar.com) on Old Street is a debonair subterranean drinking den serving up Prohibitionera cocktails and live jazz. GET THE LOOK: Ready to invest? Soho’s Lucy In Disguise ›› (lucyindisguiselondon.com) is great for Twenties silk slips and brocade gowns, and there’s retro hair and make-up styling on the floor below. Blokes need a sharp suit and a hat: Beyond Retro (beyondretro.com) has swoony blazers
Bangin’ bunker: Forties cool at the Blitz Party
and waistcoats. On a budget? Hit the high street – you’ll be amazed at the Twenties influences. Ladies, Claire’s Accessories (claires.co.uk) has rails of cheap faux-pearls. DON’T SAY: “But The Great Gatsby is shit.”
1940s THE SCENE: Swing dancing, Lindy Bop dresses, fedoras, military wear, Brylcreem – and a stiff upper lip. These are the War Years, after all. GET INVOLVED: The Blitz Party (theblitzparty.com, next event June 8) is the top one for this era, with live big bands and swing dancing taking over a south London bunker complete with sandbags, blackout curtains and searchlights. Get your moves in order first at Saturday Night Swing Club (swingdanceuk.com), every second Saturday of the month, which offers three rooms of vintage dancing, classes and drinks until 2am. Or try Swing Patrol (swingpatrol.co.uk), which also hosts social dancing events all over London, including an extracool sounding one at Dalston Roof Park on May 31. GET THE LOOK: You can find old-school army uniforms at hogspear.com. Then there’s Revival Retro (revival-retro.com), just off Carnaby Street, which does a range of Forties garb, from tea dresses to more glam frocks and faux-fur stoles, and men’s waistcoat-and-trousers combos. For bargain finds, try trawling Portobello Market. DON’T SAY: “Do you swing?”
YES, THE NINETIES ARE NOW VINTAGE A random fact to chill your bones: That ‘70s Show, Fox’s ‘period sitcom’ starring Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis, first aired in 1998, 18 years after the Seventies ended. If an equivalent show were to air today, it would be called That ‘90s Show, as 18 years have passed since 1995. Feel like an old fogey? Drown your sorrows at one of these tribute nights, celebrating decades so seemingly recent to TNT that we’re comforting ourselves with the word ‘retro’, as opposed to ‘fucking ages ago’. SEVENTIES: CARWASH Club Aquarium on Old Street churns out the Seventies cheese at Carwash every Saturday night, encouraging flamboyant fancy dress and cranking up the ‘wet and wild’ thanks to its in-club pool and Jacuzzi (so don’t forget to pack your swimsuits). clubaquarium.co.uk EIGHTIES: REFLEX This City bar is dedicated entirely to the era of truly terrifying haircuts, spinning decade-specific tunes ‘til 4am on Friday and Saturday nights. Dressing the part is appreciated and May 31 even sees a special ‘Hawaiian Shirt Party’. The house’s signature Cheeky Vimto Partini will probably make all of this seem like a good idea. reflex-london.co.uk NINETIES: I LOVE THE ‘90S Head to the Barfly in Camden on May 26 for an epic ‘I Love The ‘90s vs Silent Disco’ night. There’s Nineties pop, rock, hiphop and Britpop downstairs, and a silent disco upstairs if it all gets a bit much. Regular Nineties nights are at Camden’s The Jazz Cafe, with some drinks just £2.40. Fresh. ilovethe90sparty.com
3 REASONS TO SEE THE GREAT GATSBY
THE BEST 3D SINCE AVATAR Baz Luhrmann’s latest opus, wrapping in December 2011 and then undergoing reshoots and more than a year in production, opened to mixed reviews. But one thing the critics agreed on was the top-notch 3D, adding extra pop to the director’s signature lavish style. 26
IT’S MAKE OR BREAK FOR BAZ Aussie Luhrmann has traded on his boldly cartoonish visuals ever since he blew up Shakespeare’s Romeo & Juliet into a sexy romp for the MTV set. But there are murmurs the director is becoming a one trick pony with this outing, sacrificing story for too much over-the-top pomp.
LEONARDO DICAPRIO IN HIS PRIME He still looks like a pubescent lesbian, but Leo impresses in every role, and there’s no reason to think his Gatsby will be any different. His character’s entrance alone has hogged column inches. GREAT GATSBY: BLUFFER’S GUIDE tntmagazine.com/gatsby
Photos: Getty; © 2011 Bazmark Film III Pty Limited. The Great Gatsby is out May 16 through Warner Bros
THE SCENE: Rockabilly is arguably the sexiest look to flaunt on the vintage circuit. Think blokes in slim, cuffed-bottom jeans, cowboy shirts and creepers, rocking an impressive pompadour, and chicks in polka-dot halter dresses with sweetheart necklines, covered in tats. The music is straight-up Fifties rock ‘n’ roll with a hillbilly flavour – Elvis, Johnny Cash, et al. GET INVOLVED: For a gentle introduction, swing your hips by Shake, Rattle & Bowl (shakerattleandbowl.com), every Saturday night at All Star Lanes in Holborn. Expect dancing, diner food and bowling. A little more hardcore is Ye Olde Axe (69 Hackney Road, E2 8ET), a dodgy strip pub by day that transforms into a rocking party of hard-drinking, hard-dancing rockabilly rebels on Friday and Saturday nights. GET THE LOOK: Girls, get your knockout dresses from Vivien Of Holloway (vivienofholloway.com) on Holloway Road, which also does great cropped Fifties jeans and gypsy tops. Boys, head for the vintage shops of Brick Lane, order your cowboy or bowling shirt from sohos.co.uk, or the thrifty can go rooting around Camden Market. DON’T SAY: “Elvis is dead. Fact.” ❚
Stockists of Stop Staring, Trashy Diva Tara Starlet, Aris Allen, Re-Mix Menswear and Womenswear.
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Metro Last Light
Vampire Weekend: Modern Vampires Of The City
Fighting through a mutant apocalypse in 2034’s Moscow. Enthralling. £39.50 amazon.co.uk
The Big Apple-influenced third album from the NY indie rockers. £10 amazon.co.uk
Mystery Murders: Jack The Ripper Primal Scream: More Light
Track down London’s infamous Ripper in this DS mystery puzzler. £18.95 play.com
The 10th studio album from the eclectic rockers, this one chastising the Noughties’ indifferent generation. £10.75 amazon.co.uk
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Last year’s Man Booker Prizewinning novel about Anne Boleyn and Henry VIII. £9.99 waterstones.com
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Proper misery guts Hugh Jackman, Russell Crowe, Anne Hathaway and Amanda Seyfried star in this megahit adaptation of the longrunning stage musical. £10 amazon.co.uk
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The fifth and final season of the twisty, turny hit sci-fi show and its parallel reality. £28 amazon.co.uk
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LifestyleHEALTH CLASS OF THE WEEK
battodo Finally, an exercise class that lets you live out samurai fantasies. Battodo is the Japanese art of swordsmanship, although participants at the Battodo Fudokan training school only get to practice with a wooden weapon – slicing through the air with an elongated pole can’t help but put one in mind of Star Wars. Playacting Luke Skywalker’s duel with Darth Vader has a certain (geeky) cool sheen, but can it get you fit? Well, you might not break out into a mega sweat, but if that’s what you wanted, you’d sign up for a spin class. What battodo provides is improved focus, coordination, flexibility and strategic thinking. The school’s founder, John Evans, notes that the sport also has meditative qualities (think tai chi, but with weapons). Beginners to the martial art will start with the basics, such as footwork, how to hold a bokken (wooden sword), plus some thrusting and cutting movements. To get to a real blade, it might take about a year. The school offers fourweek courses and drop-in classes for novices. Beginners classes Mon, 6.15pm-7.15pm; Thur, 6.30pm7.30pm. £10 for drop-in, £50 for six-week beginners course.
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Get retro fit Being new doesn’t make a workout hip – these sweat-busters have been trendy for decades Words daisy carrington
Everything old is new again, especially when it comes to keeping in shape. So ditch that new-fangled machine at the stuffy gym and give these old-school exercises a run.
Twenties: Swing Dance Do you long to break out the zoot suit? Then it’s time you joined Swing Patrol for one of the many swing classes they have set up throughout London. If you want to get really into it, you can choose your niche. They do workshops in Balboa, Lindy Hop and aerials (when you throw your partner into the air). WHERE: Various locations. HOW MUCH: £8 per class; £70 for 10 sessions. swingpatrol.co.uk
Thirties: Aqua Ballet In the Thirties, nearly every film opened with an elaborate synchronised swimming number, usually starring Ethel Merman. The art is not dead, however, and there are several clubs in London that offer lessons
in underwater dance. The Seymour Synchro Swim School is the city’s oldest, and it offers classes for all levels and ages. WHEN/WHERE: Queen Mother’s Sports Centre, 223 Vauxhall Bridge Road, SW1V 1EL. HOW MUCH: Trial sessions from £4. Membership is £30 per month. seymoursynchro.org.uk
Forties: Pin Up Body Workout If you want to look like a gangster’s moll (translation: uber-fit), then the Pin Up Body Workout is for you. In truth, it’s more social call, starting with a makeover (vintage threads provided), followed by vintage exercises designed to define beautiful curves. It all culminates in afternoon tea. When you look this good, what’s an extra scone or two? WHEN/WHERE: Sat and Sun, 11am-4.30pm. 6 Fitzroy Square, W1T 5DX. HOW MUCH: There’s a limited time offer of £35 per class (it’s usually £99). pinupbody.com
Islington Yoga, 357 City Road, EC1V 1LR; Eastbourne House, Bullards Place, E2 0PT battodo-fudokan.co.uk Angel; Bethnal Green
Wheelie fun: Roller Disco 30
Aerobics goddess: Jane Fonda
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Clarifying body spray Eliminate unseemly spots £35 murad.co.uk
Lindy Hop to it: swing dancing’s ‘in’ Sixties: Kettlebells
HOW MUCH: £10-15.
Popular now, but kettlebells were first the weight du jour in Soviet Russia. Back then, they were wielded around by mustachioed strong men. Today, they’re taught by cleanshaven strongmen. The simple devices are a great way to build an iron bod. Fitter London offers one-off classes to give you a taster. WHEN/WHERE: Classes run Tue-Sat. 6 Bedford St, WC2 9HD. HOW MUCH: £10 per class. fitterlondon.co.uk
Photos: Swing Patrol; Renaissance Rooms; Youtube; Thinkstock
Seventies: Roller Disco Ah, the seedy Seventies, when short shorts and roller skates were kinky and cool. Relive it at The Renaissance Rooms’ roller disco. The music is all funk and soul, all the time. WHEN/WHERE: Thur-Sun, 8pm-2am. Miles St, SW8 1RZ.
Eighties: Jane Fonda tribute When Olivia Newton-John begged listeners to get physical, Jane Fonda was an exercise goddess worshipped by any woman packing a VCR. Frame Shoreditch gym honours the queen of aerobics with a sweat-inducing tribute class – leopard-print leotard is a must. WHEN/WHERE: Sun,11.30am; Tue, 6.30pm. 29 New Inn Yard, EC2A 3EY. NEXT WEEK HOW MUCH: £12 to Neighbourly love: drop in or £10 with The best London a top-up card. hoods for singles moveyourframe.com
Dr. Brandt CCMat Even out oily skin £34 feelunique.com
Eyes Right Smudge-free organic mascara £12 lush.co.uk
FUNNY INFOMERCIAL FITNESS CLIPS tntmagazine.com/retro-workouts
top treatment: boost hydrating facial Are London’s rare sunny days drying you out? Regain the vibrancy and moisture of your skin’s glory days with Appuru Spa’s boost hydrating facial. The spa is all organic, and they use all-natural Dr Hauschka products, which are full of anti-oxygen-packed plant oils to nourish your beleaguered face. The treatment also helps relieve those afflicted with sensitive skin conditions, such as acne or rosacea. £60 for 65 minutes.
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White wine and fig soap Tasty handmade soap £4.50 littlecotesoap.co.uk tntMagazine.com
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Highlights wheel: bus tours are a great way to see the city and start a career
Guiding the way Like spinning a yarn? Love London? Don’t want to spend working life chained to a desk? Give tour leading a try Words Daisy carrington London is a city full of stories. As such, there is always demand for decent tour guides to tell them. Many tourists flock to the Big Smoke desperate for a taste of the city’s history (the more sordid, secret, and off-the-wall, the better). If you’ve a passion for facts, and a knack for making them interesting to others, it might just be the profession for you.
Finding your niche Once upon a time, history was a tour guide’s bread and butter, but these days a guide can choose their area of expertise – London is awash with shopping tours, street art strolls and guided ghost walks. You name it, and someone’s probably guiding it. One of the city’s most popular walks involves a hefty amount of fibs. 32
London Street Tours’ Liars’ London walk includes two guides, one telling the truth and the other spinning a fabricated version – and it’s up to the participants to tell which is which. “It’s not enough to be an expert,” says Chris Roberts, who works on this tour. “You really have to be a bit of a show-off. Some people can tell a good joke and some people can’t, and it’s not their fault, it’s just the way it is. It’s the same with storytelling. To be a good guide, you have to be able to tell a good story.” A tour is an elongated sermon, so passion for the subject matter is key. “We’re selling the city that we are in love with,” explains City of London guide Diana O’Reardon. “We’re selling a product that we believe in. We’re not
just taking people through because they want to see England in five days; there’s an emotional thing as well.” O’Reardon was in IT when she went to a history lecture on London which piqued her interest in the subject. She volunteered at St Paul’s Cathedral before launching her new full-time career.
To BB or not to BB London tour guides fall into two camps, those who are Blue Badge certified and those who aren’t. Blue Badge certification doesn’t come cheap or quickly at about £5000 over up to two years. Trevor Jeanes, who is Blue Badge certified, says the process can be “pretty all-encompassing” in the lead-up to a series of exams. The main advantage is BB guides can access
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LIFESTYLECAREERS On the job nicky croydon
Career Pet salon manager Age 23 Lives Bromley From Bromley How did you get into your job? I worked in admin, but I always wanted to work with animals. One day I just decided to go for it. I did a grooming training course and applied at my local Pets At Home store to work in their Groom Room.
[Caption] Talk it up: tour guides need a gift of the gab
Historic: Beefeaters give tours of the great Tower of London
London’s big ticket deal two main types of sights that are closed to GET INTO TRAINING irritation. Firstly, knownon-certified guides. it-alls. “If you’re clever, The Institute of Tourist Guiding “As an accredited you can sometimes get (itg.org.uk) has a variety of Blue Badge guide, the group to manage resources for guides, including I’m allowed to guide the person themselves, training courses. They also provide the Tower of London, as they’ll be as annoyed tips for getting started, and links Westminster Abbey and to several organisations that hire as you,” O’Reardon says. various museums where guides. Several boroughs also offer The other issue is an unregistered guide dealing with abusive or alternatives to the Blue Badge would not be allowed,” course, including Islington, City, drunk locals, an issue Jeanes says. especially prevalent on Greenwich and Camden. Still, there are more walking tours around affordable courses that London. Roberts says help build up the skill set for guides. common sense is an asset when dealing Jeanes is the director of the with such situations. Mainly, he says, City of London guide course don’t engage. “It’s a question of being (cityoflondonguides.com), which costs assertive and moving a group along,” Roberts tells us. a comparably cheaper £500, and runs one evening a week between The bottom line September and May. Participants not only learn the history of the area, they The beauty of becoming a tour guide learn tactics such as crowd control, both is the hours are flexible and the pay within the group or on the street. But is good – fees reach £150 for Jeanes says there’s no better or worse a half day or £250 for a full for newbies between signing up for day, and even certification or cutting their teeth on more if you are NEXT WEEK the job with a coach tour company, giving a tour Work outside: such as Big Bus or Golden – as long as in a language Be an outdoor they have the passion for the job. other than activity instructor English.
There’s always one…
Like with all great-sounding jobs, there are pitfalls. In this case, guides have to
FOR LONDON’S BEST TOURS
What do you do day-to-day? No two days are the same. I start at 9am and there’s a steady flow of dogs. We bathe them, prep them, clip their nails, give them a haircut. We also handle a lot of walk-in queries from owners about grooming and we also do microchipping now. What’s the most challenging part? When a dog comes in to the salon in a bad state it can be quite hard to see, but in a short space of time we can practically give them a new lease of life. The owner’s reaction is priceless. What’s the most challenging? Obviously I’ve had the odd bite, but it’s all part of the job. petsathome.com
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Award winning, Michelin starred restaurant requires
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If you are interested in working with great food and in an energetic, friendly team please email your CV to email@example.com
We offer excellent rates of pay, but sound experience in similarly high class establishment is a must.
We offer excellent rates of pay, but sound experience in similarly high class establishment is a must.
tntjobs.co.uk SKI JOBS FRANCE T: 07824 68 1228 www.skijobsfrance.com.au Ski Jobs France supports Aussies, Kiwis and Canadians to organise a working holiday in France. Guaranteed job or your money back.
JOB OF THE WEEK: Ski Jobs in France Location: French Alps Salary: Competitive Package Employers are recruiting now for ski jobs in hotels, bars, restaurants, chalets, airport transfers & ski shops. Dec to May. French speaking not essential, but helps. Assistance applying for French visa. Escape the grey British winter. Visit www.skijobsfrance.com.au for more info & email firstname.lastname@example.org
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how you spend it!
Maria Street, 22
A forkin’ deal While supplies last, Ikea shoppers can purchase a 16-piece, stainless steel xxxxxxxxx cutlery set for £1.50. Though you can’t purchase Xxxxxxxxxxx the goods online, visit ikea.com for a pointer to participating stores.
Job Student From Portugal Lives London How do you budget? With difficulty. Honestly, I pretty much just spend my money and don’t really save like I should. Do you have any tips for saving money in London? Don’t drink coffee from coffee shops because it gets really expensive to buy them. You can just make it at home.
On the fly Airline easyJet has exactly Xxxxxxxxxxx 335,000 seats for sale for under £45 (well, they did but they’re selling fast). The seats are for xxxxxxxxx travel until June 27. Destinations Xxxxxxxxxxx include Nice, Paris and Amsterdam. Prices are one-way based on two people travelling. Go to easyjet.com for xxxxxxxxx more information. Xxxxxxxxxxx
Pizza cheap! Register your details at pizzaexpress.com and get a voucher for three courses for £13, available Friday to Sunday at participating locations. You’ll need to hurry, as the deal ends May 26. Make me blush Hand your particulars over to Cafe Rouge and get a voucher that lets you order two main meals, with the second ringing up at the till for only £2.50. Available Sunday to Friday until May 12 at participating venues. Visit caferougeoffers.co.uk.
What was your last big blow-out? This brownie from Borough Market. Just kidding, but it is pretty big! What non-essential items do you spend money on? Well, obviously brownies. Going to Borough Market is my weakness!
how THEY spend it! Baby, that costs! Elton John and David Furnish are among the celebrity brigade who have shelled out £1200 for Bugaboo strollers. Victoria Beckham and Gwyneth Paltrow also have them.
❚ Beyoncé and Jay-Z are big spenders when it comes to baby girl Blue Ivy Carter. They reportedly dropped £386,000 on a gold rocking horse (not to mention the £830,000 they allegedly gave Lenox Hill hospital for a private birth).
Suit up: David, Elton and their little man Zachary
❚ David and Victoria Beckham also like to go a bit posh with their three sons. They once bought a £32,000 treehouse for their little clan to play in. Aww, cute!
❚ According to Forbes, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie spend £6.4m per year on their kids. They once spent £4500 on a private boat for Pax’s seventh birthday party. ❚ When Jenifer Lopez and Mark Anthony had twins Max and Emme, Tom Cruise (the children’s godfather) reportedly splashed £128,000 on their matching designer christening outfits, a fish tank and Disney DVDs.
Need to send money between UK and home? r Cheapee than th banks*
*Source: 1st Contact survey of UK high street bank charges, April 2008.
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How rude!: the offending sign
residents red-faced over topless gaffe new zealand
Residents of a sleepy area of Wellington have been left red-faced after a council blunder left them with a cheeky road name. Homeowners in Torless Terrace were shocked to see the wording on a road sign replaced by workers changed to read Topless Terrace. And it isn’t the first time. In 2008, Old Bullock Road in Highbury was changed to the slightly more bawdy Old Bollock Road. The council ended up selling the sign and donating cash to testicular cancer research. Council spokesman Richard MacLean said the latest gaffe was being addressed. “We don’t want it turning into a tourist attraction or to be overrun by tittering schoolboys,” he added. Indeed. tweets of the week @Jason9Bent Newspapers saying #Fergie will retire. Absolutely gutted. Black Eyed Peas will never be the same again @simonblackwell If you make fun of [UKIP leader] Nigel Farage on Twitter, his fans get very cross. He’s the fat racists’ Justin Bieber
hot stuff! thief hit with chilli australia
A quick-thinking employee thwarted an attempted robbery at a takeaway joint, by flooring the suspect with a bucket of chilli. The 24-year-old man had tried to grab the contents of the till after a heated row with two members of staff in the Sydney suburb of Rosebery. As one worker went off to raise the 36
Artist Patricia Piccinini’s Skywhale, commissioned to commemorate Canberra’s centenary, may end up costing local taxpayers AU$300,000. The creature is an imagining of what might be if whales had evolved to take to the air. Obviously
alarm, his female colleague tussled with the suspect. When she attempted to stop him from getting to the register, he allegedly hit her across the chest. In response, the 27-year-old grabbed a nearby bucket of chilli and threw it in the robber’s face, incapacitating him. Police arrived within minutes and were then able to apprehend the man, who was treated for minor burns and charged with assault with the intent to rob.
man harpoons wife in face by accident
his spear gun when it went off, firing a harpoon that hit her spine. Elisangela Borborema Rosa was rushed to hospital and underwent emergency surgery after the incident in the coastal city of Arraial do Cabo. Neurosurgeon Allan da Costa said the harpoon came within 1cm of killing the woman. He said he expects her to make a full recovery. A police officer in Arrial do Cabo said: “Everything indicates it was an accident, but we are investigating. We don’t think the husband tried to kill her.”
A 28-year-old woman has miraculously survived after her husband accidentally shot her in the mouth with a harpoon. The woman’s husband was cleaning
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Role reversal? She wished he would stop weeping about where this was all going and just give her an orgasm
IN NUMBERS 50
Distance, in metres, of world’s smallest fun run which took the fastest competitor 7 seconds to finish in Staffordshire
Price, in pounds, British tourists were charged for four ice creams in Rome, forcing the city’s mayor to apologise
WOMEN DO LIKE HAVING SEX SHOCK!
Number of applicants, in thousands, who’ve signed up for a one-way ticket to be the first to step foot on Mars
It’s a myth that men just want sex and women just want relationships, according to the university of the bloody obvious. Sexual health expert Dr Juliet Richters has collected data over 10 years from more than 25,000 Australians to make her case. The professor, from the University of New South Wales, says women rate sex highly, especially early in relationships. Men are less positive early on, but report improved satisfaction over time. “There is not much evidence for women being the only ones who are in it for the emotional relationship. And it’s true that men are slower to commit,” she said. Thanks for clearing that up.
STUDENT THROWS SANGER AT PM
Photos: Getty; Thinkstock
It all got a bit too much for one student when prime minister Julia Gillard visited a school last week. As the premier wandered around the excited crowd outside Marsden High School in Logan, Queensland, there were cheers and boos from kids. As they tried to get photographs, a sandwich was thrown from the crowd at Gillard – but it missed. “I think out of hundreds and hundreds screaming over-excited kids, one kid
Amount, in pounds, expected to be raised from the sale of Indian hero Gandhi’s sandals at Mullocks in Shropshire
Missile: the sarnie (circled) missed Gillard thought they might be just a little bit naughty and had a little squealing sense of delight as they did it,” Gillard said. Kyle Thomson, 16, has been suspended from school for 15 days over the incident. However, he denies that he was the culprit.
PETITION TO CREATE NEW SUPERPOWER AMERISTRALIA
Australia and America should merge to form Ameristralia, according to a petition brought before the White House’s official website. DA, the petitioner from Beverly Hills, has already got 5000 signatures for the cause, remaining 95,000 short of getting the government to address his issue. “We will rain down freedom and poisonous creatures on our enemies,” a supporter on Reddit said. Another added: “The bastard children of the British Empire united at last to a worlddominating superpower.”
QUOTE OF THE WEEK There’s a kind of unhealthy friction that exists between Leo and I on set Joel Edgerton on filming with his The Great Gatsby co-star DiCaprio ahead of Baz Luhrmann’s latest movie release
TNT online is your one stop shop for breaking news, what’s on in London and awesome travel ideas. Log on every day and get your fill. You know you can’t get enough TNT Magazine so check out tntmagazine.com
E T I S B E W T S E I B B E THE INTERW INTERNET! ON THE this week goodies Here’s a taste of the
WEB-ONLY FEATURES TNT Magazine doesn’t stop in these pages, our website is chock-full of web-only original articles, from travel goodies to hilarious features
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Laughing matter: Gillard and (inset) greeting students at Marsden State High School before lunch arrived
Sandwiched by a shoolboy – Julia Gillard got off lightly
Photos: Getty; Youtube
Provocative PM gets the soft option in political target practice
Julia Gillard has been accused of many things in her rise to Labor PM. She has invoked the love and hate of many and has left a swathe of opponents in her wake on both sides of the political divide. It was a matter of time until someone threw something at her, and she should count herself lucky it was just a sarnie. Gillard has always been an antagonistic little lady. Speaking only last week on ABC’s Q&A programme, she said she was “the sort of person who likes to have a feisty go”. There have been many who have found this out the hard way, not least Tony Abbott who famously found himself on the receiving end of a savage tongue lashing last September when Gillard attacked him, in the House of Representatives no less, for being a hypocrite and a misogynist. The speech made her a legend to millions around the world. When her position was challenged in a botched leadership coup earlier this year by hapless former Labor leaders Simon Crean and Kevin Rudd, their hesitation cost them dearly. Crean put his head above the parapet, called for a leadership spill and found Gillard firing him for his ‘outburst’. She then charged ahead calling a leadership spill of her own, only for Rudd to announce he wouldn’t run a mere 10 minutes before the 4.30pm ballot time she’d called. Proper ballsy. So while George Bush had a shoe lobbed at his head, Sarah Palin a bunch of tomatoes aimed at her scary face and Tony Blair witnessed a condom of purple flour fly perilously close to his bonce, Gillard gets a tame and off-target breaded lunch snack. The 16-year-old Marsden State High School ‘culprit’ Kyle Thompson – who has denied it was him (he was trying to protect her), and even explained this to Gillard when he surprised her on a radio phone-in post-sarniegate – has not got off the hook, though. Gillard said she’ll treat the incident as a laughing matter but won’t issue a ‘prime ministerial pardon’ for the suspended boy. The lesson? Don’t fuck with Gillard, even if you are a spotty – probably hungry – teen. » Agree or disagree? Did Gillard deserve a sarnie or more? firstname.lastname@example.org
IT’S TOO EASY TO CAST JUDGEMENT Tom Cruise and Kristen Stewart recently came bottom in a poll in the US on the most trustworthy celebrities. Twilight star Stewart did the dirty with her Snow White And The Huntsman director, breaking Robert Pattinson’s fragile little vamp heart, and Cruise has been the focus of much scientologospeculation since his conversion to L Ron Hubbard’s ‘religion’ – but are they both so untrustworthy they should be pilloried?
I am not defending Tom Cruise
The folks of Reader’s Digest certainly think so – they’re not half as reliable as top three Tom Hanks, Sandra Bullock and Denzel Washington. But how would the readers themselves fare if they were honest with themselves about their own misdeeds and lapses of judgement? Now I am not excusing Stewart’s erroneous behaviour, nor defending Cruise – the horror! – but it’s all too easy to judge others without turning those same morals in the mirror. TNTMAGAZINE.COM
Boldly going... 78,000 people have signed up for a trip-of-a-lifetime to Mars. Catch is, it’s one-way WORDS CAROL DRIVER
one New Zealander have uploaded application videos on to mars-one.com (you can send them direct to the company as well). TNT watched some of them to find out why people would apply to make the 400-million-mile journey. Karl is so far the only Kiwi to apply via the official website. Describing himself in his profile, the 37-year-old says he’s an “actor, turned sound guy, turned writer, turned computer programmer. I’ve pretty much done it all... apart from being a male model, though I do have GREAT legs”. In his short video, which has had nearly 2000 views, Karl explains: “I want to go to Mars because I want to be an evil
I want to take a dump on another planet
dictator, and ruling an entire planet would be pretty sweet. I’d also like to be the first person to take a dump on another planet. I’m smart cos I’ve got these glasses and a pretty sweet beard, so if anyone thinks they can beat that... [laughs].” Student Leigh Colthup, 18, who writes that he comes from “the Australia”, says going to Mars is his “real career goal”. He adds: “I love to mess around but when you need me most I stand up to the fight. I will show you the Australian spirit and what a true Aussie can do.” In his video, which has so far had more than 500 views, Colthup says: “I want to do this for you. Not everyone will be able to commit themselves to a one-way trip, but I’m willing and eager to put my life on the line to progress humanity.” Aussie Paul’s video is one of the most highly rated, with five stars. The 40-year-old films himself inside ‘Serenity One’ en route “to our new home”. The film director and writer adds: “Why leave Earth? Birds singing in the forest, beautiful
For the adventurous, it would be the trip of a lifetime – the opportunity to leave Earth and set up camp on Mars in the biggest manned space exploration in history. In theory, it sounds like a bad sci-fi film, or a crazy pipedream. But it’s not. It’s the mission of Mars One, a company planning to establish a human settlement on the Red Planet in 2023. There is, however, a catch. It’s a one-way ticket – candidates will never return to this planet. Just two weeks ago Mars One opened its online application process, asking people from around the world to submit a one-minute video outlining their motivations and their sense of humour. So far, more than 78,000 have applied from 120 countries, in the hope of becoming a Mars settler. Bas Lansdorp, co-founder and CEO of the Dutch company, said: “This is turning out to be the most desired job in history. These numbers put us right on track for our goal of half-a-million applicants. Mars One is a mission representing all humanity and its true spirit will be justified only if people from the entire world are represented. I’m proud that this is exactly what we see happening.” Applicants don’t need military training nor experience in flying aircraft or a science degree. But they must be over 18, and: “Have a deep sense of purpose, willingness to build and maintain healthy relationships, the capacity for self-reflection and ability to trust.” The application process closes on August 31, 2013, after which, Mars One will take the “most committed, creative, resilient and motivated” people through to the second phase. There are four stages in total, with the final one ending in 2015. Then, between 28 and 40 people – picked from an audience vote – will be employed by Mars One, undergoing extensive training for eight years until they make the trip to their final destination, emigrating to Mars where they’ll spend the rest of their lives living and working. So far, 19 Australians, 10 South Africans, 30 Brits and just TNTMAGAZINE.COM
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For more than 11 weeks, TNT has been campaigning with your help against the UK Border Agency. We’ve revealed horror stories, gained press coverage in the UK and Australia, and attracted support from high-profile MPs. To read our coverage so far, visit tntmagazine.com/ukba. Seven weeks ago it was announced the UK Border Agency will be split into two organisations – one dealing with visas. In true shambolic style, a name for the office, and how it’s going to work, is yet to be decided. So far, all that’s clear is that it’s going to be the same staff, reporting to the same bosses, in the same building, operating within the same budgets. Therefore, our demands for this new entity remain the same. Add your voice to TNT Magazine’s UKBA Balls-Up campaign to demand the new office changes its policies so that: CAMPAIG NTTCAMPAIGNN • TN • TT •• T
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sunsets, walking on the beach ... a thousand experiences I’ll never have again. I believe that in order to be OK with leaving [this] life forever, you need to love and cherish all those things and go anyway, because not going would be the real tragedy. “I see such beauty in the world and I think, how can I make this a better place for all of us? The answer is to inspire people and be the eyes and ears of the planet.” Whether these creative candidates make it through to the final 24 remains to be seen. If they did, they’d be featured in a global reality TV show, following their training. Viewers will then vote for their favourite four to be the first team to head for Mars – and observe them settling on the Red Planet, which will be a barren, cratered landscape. The astronauts will share their experiences with people on Earth, as they build their new home, conduct experiments and explore. But as well as facing an unbreathable atmosphere which is 95 per cent carbon dioxide, candidates will have to endure extreme temperatures ranging from 35˚C to -135˚C. Every year, a further four astronauts would be sent on the 200-day journey, building up the colony to 20 people by 2033. But what of the ever-so-slight catch that it’s a one-way trip? Mars One says a fuelled rocket would have to be constructed on Mars to return the humans to Earth. Something which would have to be done without expert supervision, and that would be “extremely complex and expensive”. However, Bas Lansdorp, M.Sc, co-founder says about the mission: “It will create a new generation of heroes – the first explorers to go to Mars will step straight into the history books. We expect it to capture an audience of millions, culminating in several billion online spectators when the first crew lands on Mars.” To submit your video by the end of August, see applicants.mars-one.com.
Mars candidates: (clockwise from top) Karl, Leigh and Paul
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✔ Every applicant receives correspondence when an application has been received ✔ Advice is then sent to all applicants detailing the process system and what it means for those wanting to work or travel ✔ Every applicant gets access to an emergency helpline which they can call for updates at any time, not only after six months ✔ The target for processing visas for those based in the UK who are eligible to work is reduced to three months ✔ A full refund is offered to applicants if their application takes longer than the target time if it is due to UKBA incompetency ✔ The amount of premium service appointments is increased – and a full refund is offered to applicants if the UKBA doesn’t adhere to the allotted 24-hour timescale ✔ Applicants wishing to extend visas to stay in the UK can do so before the ‘28 days before expiry’ deadline Add your name to our government epetition. Follow the link from tntmagazine.com/ukba
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The tide has officially turned. As we enjoy an occasional burst of sunshine through the clouds in London, our mates on the other side of the world are freezing their balls off – literally, perhaps, in Heath Shaw. The Collingwood defender, pictured here with an equally freezing Dayne Beams, had to laugh to keep warm during a recovery session at St Kilda Beach last week. This week their Magpies take on Geelong. See it Sat 10.30am on ESPN
all french final to be won on mistakes rugby union
On fire: Hamish Rutherford
rutherford does it easy in first os test cricket
Black Caps batsman Hamish Rutherford kept making international cricket look easy cruising to a century in his side’s first tour match on England soil ahead of this week’s first Test at Lord’s. Rutherford made light work of a second string England Lions line up to notch 116 from 135 balls for New Zealand before rain stopped play at Grace Rd, Leicester. This Thursday is his biggest challenge yet, as he takes on England at the home of cricket from 11am. Rutherford, son of former Test star Ken, scored 171 on debut in March and will be key for the visitors in the two-match series. 42
Toulon and Clermont’s Heineken Cup final in Dublin on Saturday is more likely to be a battle of attrition and a testing time for ref Alain Rolland than a feast of free-flowing rugby. English forward Andrew Sheridan, who lines up with Aussie Matt Giteau and Lions rejector Jonny Wilkinson for Toulon, laid it down simply: “I think it will come down to who makes the least mistakes,” he said. “It’s [about] coping with the pressure and getting all the basics done well.” Watch it live from 4pm on Sky Sports 3.
rafa’s last chance for silverware football
Rafael Benitez’s inevitable end as Chelsea manager could climax with a European prize when his Chelsea side take on Benfica on Wednesday in the Europa Cup final (7.45pm, ITV). The teams met in last year’s Champions League and the Londoners won both games by a one-goal margin.
BIG WEEK FOR ... The London Broncos are tough to pick this year – they’re languishing at the bottom of the Super League ladder but have pulled out performances good enough to beat the likes of giants St Helens. This week the capital’s only top-flight rugby league team, led by halfback Craig Gower (below) with a host of Aussie back-up, face their ultimate challenge at the Twickenham Stoop against ladder leaders the Wigan Warriors on Saturday, kicking off at 3pm. The Bronc’s last meeting with the red and white big guns was one to forget, with the northerners romping in 48-18 at DW Stadium (at least it wasn’t the 84-6 drubbing they gave to Hull KR), so they’ll be keen to make amends. For tickets visit londonbroncorl.com.
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QUOTES OF THE WEEK [Alex Ferguson] was never afraid to change, adapt and 27 years later departs Old Trafford with an extraordinary trophy cabinet and legacy – a testament to what can be achieved when you stand by someone and give them a chance to shine
Flyer: Nahki Wells’ Bradford City Bantams are back at Wembley
PREVIEW CUP RUNS OVER, PROMOTION BECKONS LEAGUE ONE & TWO PLAY-OFF FINALS
SAT/SUN, 1.30PM, SKY SPORTS 1 League One and Two giant killers Brentford and Bradford City’s form suffered after their epic Cup runs this year, but both have chances to go up a division this weekend at Wembley. In the NPower League 2 play-off, Capital One Cup finalists Bradford play Nottingham after scraping into the last play-off place and then winning their semifinal with a 3-1 win away at Burton Albion. A win on Saturday takes them to League
One and after beating three Premier League sides (Wigan, Arsenal, Aston Villa) on the way to defeat by Swansea at this ground, they’ve got to back themselves. League One’s Brentford on the other hand were agonisingly short – as in one tragic penalty miss in the last minute before a length of the field break from Doncaster – of automatic promotion to the Championship. The team which took Chelsea to a fourth-round FA Cup play-off have had an up and down year, but won a shootout against Swindon Town to meet Yeovil Town in this play-off.
THE CHAT | Beale back in Last Chance Saloon
Mark Bosnich, who played twice under Fergie as a teen and at his peak at 27
This is the event I should have been doing 10 years ago Jana Pittman is a two-time 400m hurdles world champion, but reckons her new sporting love bobsled is much cooler
As long as the fee is right, I’m prepared to go anywhere Enigmatic world snooker champ Ronnie O’Sullivan refuses to jump on the global circuit unless the price is right
FOOTBALL Has Kurtley Beale done his dash for the Q Wallabies with his latest suspension for an out of hours offence at Melbourne Rebels? It’s probably the best example of where Australian A rugby is at that a player who gets axed for an alcoholrelated incident, gets another chance and then breaks a booze ban, is still considered for a certainty for international duty. The prodigious utility was banned from drinking for the rest of the year, yet given another last chance last week. “It is worth noting this isn’t a public behavioural issue that’s had an impact in public,” Rebels boss Rob Clarke said, paving the way for more counselling. “This is Kurtley breaching agreed behavioural protocols between us, the ARU and him.”
Real Madrid v Athletico Madrid Spanish Copa Del Rey final Fri, 8.30pm, Sky Sports 1
AFL West Coast v North Melbourne Eagles and Roos live at a decent hour Fri, 11.30am, ESPN
FOOTBALL Rebel: Kurtley Beale
Arsenal v Wigan One wants Europe, one wants to stay up Tue, 7.45pm, Sky Sports 1 TNTMAGAZINE.COM
Down to the Last A form of cricket that makes Twenty20 look cumbersome is a hit with busy Londoners WORDS MICHAEL GADD
When it comes to the speedier forms of cricket, former Australian all-rounder Ian Harvey is the guru. He was there on the ground floor when Twenty20 cricket took over 50 over one-dayers as the shortest format. In June 2003, the year T20 took the sport by storm, the swashbuckling Gloucestershire batsman demolished Warwickshire’s bowlers to all corners of Edgbaston to score Twenty20’s first ever top level century from just 50 balls. A decade on it’s an integral, lucrative and hugely popular fixture on the international calendar with Tests and ODIs. For almost just as long, Last Man Stands cricket has been doing for social sloggers what T20 has been doing for the pros in an even more condensed form, with rule amendments that maximise each player’s chance to contribute and the speed of play – a game clocks in at little more than two hours. Now, since it was formed in London in 2005 by Bjorn Briggs and Wayne Greve, more than 30,000 people play in LMS competitions around the world – there are 1700 franchises in five countries and 7500 players in England alone. Harvey has signed on as an LMS ambassador, and who better to endorse the form. “It’s a fantastic concept,” he says of the largest amateur cricket league in the world. “I didn’t realise how big it was. One of the great things is that it takes just two hours. People who don’t have the time on their hands to play on the weekends or even a full Twenty20, they’re in and they’re out – it’s a great way to keep people in contact with the game.” Not worried that ‘fast food cricket’, as some critics call it, will take over the game as a whole, Harvey, who also played in the first Indian Premier League in 2007, believes all forms can work together simultaneously. “The purists of course love the long form of the game, the Tests – I wasn’t lucky enough to play them, but it’s the ultimate in cricket,” he says, with a career of 73 ODIs for Australia, an average of 31.93 in T20s and the distinction of 44
RULE VARIATIONS IN LAST MAN STANDS Teams: Eight players per team, maximum four overs per bowler Length: 20 overs a side, 65 minutes only per innings. Penalties apply Last Man Stands: A team is out at the fall of the eighth wicket. The ‘last man standing’ after the seventh wicket bats alone Double Play: Two plays can be out from one delivery, ie. when one batsman is caught the fielder can run out the other Five Ball Over: Five balls per over, with a max of six (except in last over). The first wide or no ball is one run, more are three runs Free Hit: Every no ball or wide is followed by a free hit Home Run Rule: A six off the last ball of an innings is 12 runs Retiring: Batsmen retire at 50 but return when all others are out having one of the best slower balls in cricket to his name. “T20 has transformed the game, right the way up through all forms,”Harvey says. “The range of shots we now see in the IPL and Big Bash, and the range of deliveries bowlers need to come up with to counter those skills, is great for the game. And at a social level, the more people who are encouraged to play in formats like LMS the better.” Harvey will show he’s still got it when he lines up against his old England foe Darren Gough at Lord’s Nursery Ground on May 24 as part of a LMS celebrity match to mark the start of the new summer season this week. LMS is giving players who register before Friday, May 17 (see details on opposite page) the chance to play with them at the home of cricket. “It’s a great chance for a social player to have a run at a place about as special as it gets in cricket,” Harvey says, adding a wrap for his opposing skipper. “Goughy definitely got me out a few times and hit me for a few sixes, so whoever’s on my team will have to keep an eye on him.“ Just like T20s, ODIs and from next year Test matches have their own world championship, LMS has its own, this year in London, with 96 teams from all countries entering and the final to be played at Lord’s on September 4 for £10,000.
Andrew Williams (left) with Southwark’s The Wombats
Limited overs Legend: Ian Harvey
summer as dark horses aussies unsettled: harvey
Quick single: Last Man Stands action
But the bread and butter of LMS is those keen to get bat on ball after a hard day at work. Andrew Williams, star opening batsman for a team of mostly Aussies called The Wombats, says it’s an ideal format for busy City workers. “Most of our team works in the City, and we have a couple of teachers, and most just don’t have the time to play at the weekend,” he says. “But after work for a couple of hours is fantastic.” Another unique aspect of LMS is the stats database which means all players everywhere in the world can see their bowling and batting figures online, just like the pros. Williams, who moved to London from Brisbane, goes into this year’s competition as the top-ranked batsman in England after the incumbent, Russell Collett of Wandworth’s Old Seagullians, returned to South Africa. Wombat Williams, who in 14 innings has been retired 10 times on 50 runs (see box), takes the distinction with a pinch of salt. “The figures can be skewed, depends on the quality of the comp, size of the field etc, but it differentiates the comp from others,” he says. “Everyone says they don’t care about the stats but if they aren’t updated online 100 per cent correctly they’ll notice and let them know. It’s good fun.” With smaller teams on a full field, fast and true playing synthetic wickets and other variations on the game, tactics come into play, but they mean everyone plays a part. “When it comes to batting there’s nowhere to hide,” he says. “I don’t know that I’ve ever been in a game when everyone didn’t get a hit. And because there’s only eighta-side there’s a lot of gaps in the field, so bowling with accuracy and to your field is a lot more effective than raw pace. There’s never a moment you’re not involved.” To be in with a chance of playing in a team captained by Harvey or Gough, quote TNT when you register your LMS team online before May 17. For your nearest competition visit lastmanstands.com
Michael Clarke’s Australians go into both the ICC Champions Trophy (from June 6 to 23 with games at London’s Kia Oval, Birmingham’s Edgbaston and Cardiff Wales Stadium) and the Ashes (starting July 10 at Trent Bridge) this summer as rank underdogs, says former international Ian Harvey. The ODI and T20 legend gives TNT his predictions.
ICC Champions Trophy Who are the favourites for you? “You can’t go past the Saffas at the moment in any form of the game. They have the best squad going around. Great depth.” What about England? “They’re going great in one-day cricket and are of course the other team to beat. Playing at home you can’t discount that.” And the Aussies, the holders of the trophy after beating New Zealand in the 2009 final? “Australia’s always in the running, especially in limited overs. But on current form, it’s hard to know which version of them is going to turn up.” icc-cricket.com
The Ashes Was the drawn series in NZ a blip or a sign of weakness for the English? “England deserve the great run they’re having for what they’ve done behind the scenes over a period of time. I don’t take too much from NZ, they were pretty flat tracks. All credit to New Zealand for the way they got into winning positions. Brendan McCullum is a real pressure player and a class leader.” Does Australia have a chance of not being embarrassed over five Tests? “Australia looks unsettled. There’s a really good group of young bowlers, but they have to keep them fit on the field. The batting line-up must do better.” What did you take from the squad announced, including two 35-year-olds? “Chris Rogers is a terrific selection, a player who’s performed over a long period and earned his shot. Brad Haddin will do a good job too. I don’t care how old a player is, you have to pick the best ones available and give them a chance to perform.” ecb.co.uk
TNT puts the world to rights
COMMENT: OLI JONES
Imposing: the figure of Sir Alex still looms large at Old Trafford
Moyes and Ferguson must unite for success to continue David’s ability to buy into Sir Alex’s vision for Old Trafford is vital
» Agree or disagree? Is Moyes the right man for the job? firstname.lastname@example.org 46
Todd Carney’s decision to turn his back on a cool AU$1m to remain a Cronulla player is the type of loyalty story that the sporting world loves. But like most stories of gallant selflessness, if you look hard enough, there’s usually more to it. Carney, who has been dropped by both Canberra and Sydney for alcohol-related off-field ‘misdemeanours’, was given a chance at redemption by Cronulla – a club currently making headlines for all the wrong reasons after an investigation into doping was halted. Carney turned down a big money deal
Like most selfless stories something stinks
to join Penrith apparently worth AU$1m more than the Sharks could afford. Carney chose to stick with his team. Noble, right? Maybe. But the choice calls into question the integrity of the salary cap which works on the precept that clubs pay market value for their players. Does something else at Cronulla stink?
So, the man with the hardest job since Thabo Mbeki (the South African president who succeeded Nelson Mandela), the next Manchester United manager to replace Sir Alex Ferguson, has been revealed. United fans, to their credit, have generally reacted positively to the installing of David Moyes, a manager with just one second division title in his career’s silverware case: not the type of track record that would satisfy any of the other big four and certainly not comparable to the record of Fergie when he arrived from Aberdeen, having broken the Old Firm’s grip on the Scottish title and won the UEFA Cup Winner’s Cup. Moyes will be under no illusion as to the size of the boots he’s being asked to fill, and there’s a 14ft statue outdside Old Trafford ready at all times to remind him. Taking the helm at the most successful club in Europe over the past 24 years, the most valuable sports brand in the world, would be daunting for anyone. Especially when that success has been built almost entirely by the club’s previous manager, Ferguson, who didn’t just seek to create great teams but develop an infrastructure at the club steeped in former players who know, understand and similarly expect his standards at all levels. United fans and shareholders can take some solace from Fergie’s appointment as a director at the club. Moyes’s teams have always played well above their price tags on the pitch. He shares with Fergie that rarest of gifts: the ability to turn character into skill and build teams that are greater than the sum of their parts. His biggest challenge may not be on the pitch, but fitting into a club which down to mortar is the previous manager’s vision. Moyes’s capacity to establish a working relationship with Ferguson, buying into the ethos he has created, but having the fortitude to take it forward, will be essential. Either way, as a United supporter, with Moyes confirmed and Jose Mourinho all-but back at Chelsea, I can’t wait for next season and this one isn’t even over.
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Learn The Lingo courses, part of TNT’s Language School, are ideal for beginners or those who’d like to brush up on the basics
French & Spanish Five Weeks MONDAY JUNE 1O Spanish @ 6:30pm
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TRAVEL LATE DEALS | HOTSHOTS | TRAVEL TIPS | TOP FIVE | TOURS | BIG TRIP IMAGE OF THE WEEK
IT’S ALL A BIG YAWN Young South Korean Buddhists attend a ceremony at Chogye Temple ahead of Buddha’s birthday in central Seoul, South Korea.
Photos: Getty, Thinksotck
DOWN TO THE WIRE /52
HIT THE BEACH /62
GRIN AND BEAR IT /66
TNT soars a hair-rising mile in a minute along the longest zip wire in the northern hemisphere in Snowdonia, Wales.
Swaying palms, pumping parties, surf breaks and endless stretches of baking hot sand are all within three hours’ flight.
Helping cute and fluffy threatened sun bears get back to the wild at a conservation camp in Borneo is hugely rewarding. TNTMAGAZINE.COM
TRAVELDIARY Helen Elfer TRAVEL EDITOR
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Fierce competition: Dragon boats racing to the beat of a drummer
TRAVELLING LIGHT One of my clearest memories from my first backpacking jaunt is of being with my mate at an airport, surreptitiously staring at a guy also waiting to get on the plane. He was an absolute state. His hair clearly hadn’t seen soap, let alone a pair of scissors in months. His T-shirt had loads of little holes, under which I could see either very tanned or very dirty skin, and he was carrying a grotty Tesco bag with just one small bundle of material in the bottom (I can only hope, for his sake, spare undies).
Until that point, we’d been feeling like pretty hardy travellers. But woah, this guy, I thought enviously to myself, this guy is the real deal. In reality, he’d probably just run out of Gap Yah funds and got wasted the night before, but to me and my friend, he looked like the ultimate travelling hero. I remembered that feeling of envy when I was reading a piece in the FT a few weeks ago about a man called Jonathan Yevin, who just travels with stuff he can fit in his trousers – a credit card, cash, passport and toothbrush. He said he dresses in generic enough outfits to be comfy on the beach and in a city, picks dark clothes to hide stains, and the first time he stripped down to the bare essentials, he “felt exuberant”. It’s not that I particularly want to have to sprawl out on a hot beach wearing a pair of black skinny jeans with shiny patches where I spilled curry on them last month – I know in reality I’d actually hate travelling without a change of clothes and a few creature comforts. But I’m still sure that the people who manage it are on to something – and I’m still jealous. At the very least, they’re saving a hell of a wad in ridiculous baggage charges.
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Huge crowds gather in Lukang, Changhua, to watch the fierce Dragon Boat Race, where teams of 20 rowers compete to the sound of beating 6 drums which help them keep time. The festival always falls on the fifth day of the fifth month of the lunar calendar and involves poetry readings and other cultural exhibitions. JUNE
WHY: The fest originates from the story of ancient poet, Qu Yan, who’s said to have drowned himself in the Miluo River to protest against the cruel government. People in the surrounding villages tried to rescue him by setting out in their boats, which eventually became the basis for the Dragon Boat Race.
CORPUS CHRISTI Brazil
Masses of people stream through Sao Paulo on this 30 annual ‘March for Jesus’. In previous years numbers have reached five million at the procession, with people wearing Brazil’s football colours and marching alongside trucks and floats blaring rock, gospel and hymns. MAY
A public beer contest, cheese and beer pairing 29-2 sessions, live brewing demonstrations and of course, lots and lots of tasting makes Montreal’s Mondial de la Bière one heck of a celebration of the amber nectar. MAY-JUNE
Doesn’t come much more hipster than this – Upfest is 25-27 an urban paint festival, or ‘paint jam’ if you prefer. Graffiti artists will be able to cover several venues and vehicles across Bristol, including trains, a theatre and a skate park, with their original designs. MAY
This showcase of the Tohoku region’s six biggest 1-2 festivals is held in memory of 2011’s Great East Japan Earthquake. It will incorporate dancing and drumming displays and spectacular floating lanterns. JUNE
DO IT BECAUSE: If you drink enough Hsiung Huang wine there, it’s thought to ward off evil spirits. Soak it up with a few traditional zongzi (rice dumplings wrapped in bamboo leaves), which used to be dropped into the river for the fish in memory of Qu Yan.
Ever travelled bag-free? Write in and tell us
DRAGON BOAT FESTIVAL Taiwan
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cash-free travel A French hitchhiker has given a new meaning to budget travel after travelling around the world for five years without spending a penny on transport. Jeremy Marie has covered a remarkable 100,000 miles, thumbing lifts the whole way. Since setting off from Normandy in October 2007, the 29-year-old has visited more than 71 countries, hitching rides on everything from planes to donkeys. He’s trekked in 50°C heat through the deserts of Sudan and braved temperatures of -20°C while catching a lift in Kazakhstan along the way. “I like to hitchhike,” Marie said. “It’s a good way to meet people and you get to see the world from a local’s point of view and see and experience things a tourist wouldn’t usually be able to.”
paradise no more? A Fijian human rights campaign is targeting tourists to spread awareness of their cause. Destinationfiji.org accuses authorities of violating the rights of Fijian dissidents.“Thought Fiji was paradise? Think again,” it says. “Since a military dictatorship led by Commodore Frank Bainimarama seized power of the South Pacific island nation in 2006, human and workers’ rights have been under attack. Over 60 per cent of Fijian wage earners now live below the poverty line ... those speaking out against the regime are threatened and assaulted.”
Sleeping pods No one wants to see snoring, dribbling, unwashed passengers lolling across a set of chairs in airport lounges while they sleep between connections, and now Abu Dhabi International Airport has done something about it. Dozens of sleeping pods have been installed that allow passengers to have a little kip in privacy, for a fee of £8. The Finnishdesigned GoSleep chairs shield nappers from the surrounding noise, light and crowds. There are plans to upgrade the pods next year to provide internet access and storage space.
rip-off shocker They aren’t the first to get ripped off on holiday and won’t be the last, but that won’t ease the sting for the four Brits who got done on a round of ice creams. Two holidaymaking couples who wanted a taste of famous Italian gelato while on their travels in Rome ended up paying a whopping €64 (£54). The pricey ices were bought from Antica Roma ice cream bar at the top of Via della Vite, just off Piazza di Spagna. City councillor Matteo Costantini agreed it was OTT, telling Sky News: “It’s scandalous and should not be allowed to happen.”
DEEP SCOTTISH LOVE WE DON’T NEED TO SAY ANYTHING. OUR CUSTOMERS SPEAK FOR US “I booked the 5 day Highland fling, and adored every second of it. The sights were fantastic. I loved it, and would do it again on a heartbeat.” 5 Day Highland Fling, 8 April - Alex Gordon, USA
NEWS & VIEWS /HAGGiSADVENTURES
No turning back: TNT’s Dan Thorne trussed like a turkey, about to take flight; and (right) coming in to land
EAT, DRINK, SLEEP
Plas Curig Hostel is a former YHA that has been converted into Wales’ first five-star hostel – it’s a cosy, homely option if you’re on a budget but fancy a cut above the average cheapie. Dorm rooms from £22.50pn.
GETTING THERE Take the train from London Euston to Bangor from £28 return with Virgin Trains when booked in advance. virgintrains.co.uk
If you need to pamper your shredded nerves, The Quay Hotel and Spa has luxe facilities and looks out over the Conwy estuary. Rooms from £85pn.
Sit by a babbling brook outside Bryn Tyrch Inn with a beer and eat posh burgers served on a chunk of slate and chips in a tin miner’s mug. Two courses from £14.95.
A reputation for a filling breakfast makes Caffi Caban-y-Pair tops for fuelling up before a long day hiking. Mains from £7.95. (Holyhead Rd, Betws-y-Coe) Real ale pub and accomm The Eagles Bunkhouse is a hit with canoeists, cyclists and climbers. Pints from £2.90. eaglespenmachno.co.uk
All-natural: the landscape that the line zips through 52
Here and above: Dan prepares for take-off
Get stuck into traditional Welsh food at the Meadowsweet Hotel in Betws-yCoed. Set menu is £18. llanrwsthotel.com
Down to the wire TNT soars a hair-rising mile in a minute along the longest zip wire in the northern hemisphere in Snowdonia, Wales
WORDS DAN THORNE
I’m suspended horizontally, trussed up like a turkey and pointing face-first down a mile of zip wire, the longest in the northern hemisphere. And when the safety line is yanked free, there’s no turning back. Zip World opened recently in the dramatic setting of the world’s oldest and largest slate mine, Penrhyn Slate Quarry, by Snowdonia National Park. This picturesque corner of north Wales has long been popular with hikers, gorge walkers, cavers and climbers and now, with the recordbreaking zip wire and host of other outdoor activities on offer, it’s becoming known as Britain’s ‘heart of adventure.’ Having experimented with ridiculously unsafe home-made zip wires in my youth (or ‘death slides’ as we called them, with their key components including wire coat hangers and washing lines), I’m keen to test out the grown-up version, where riders can hit speeds of up to 100kmph. But before that, I wake up early and drive to Treetop Adventures, a high ropes centre near the zip-line – it seems like a good idea to start slow with some less high-octane activities. First up, a parachute simulator, the Powerfan Plummet. I’m instructed to climb 106ft up the Tree Top Tower. As I scale the steps I see a flock of peaceful, disinterested sheep far below, munching grass across the Conwy Valley. I’ve never jumped out of a plane before, but stepping to the edge of the platform, with every instinct telling me not to drop off, I imagine this is a pretty good approximation. I jump, spreading my limbs out like a deranged flying squirrel, bellowing all the way down. It’s a relief not to land with a splat or regurgitate my brekky – and I can’t stop laughing. Next I find myself on a Sky Ride with a former operations manager for Alton Towers. As our swing is hoisted 80ft into the air, he shares that he’s recently had a vasectomy, but due to the decidedly secure nature of the harness, “I needn’t have bothered”. I’m still thinking of a suitable response to that when the swing is released, and I get that brilliant, stomachdropping feeling you get from the very best rollercoasters. But these have all just been warm ups for the main event, and it’s now time to make my way past the stunning Mount Snowdon to Zip World. After popping on a helmet and jumpsuit that’s part Star Wars X-wing starfighter pilot and part Guantanamo Bay, my first port of call is the Little Zipper. A quarter of a mile long,
it’s a gentle way to grow accustomed to flying into oblivion. “We did have a cage fighter who chickened out of doing the Little Zipper last week. Last minute nerves,” the cool, woolly hat-wearing instructor tells me. Not sure if that’s helpful or not, but after jumping out of a tree, the Little Zipper feels like a relatively tame practice run for the big one. At the bottom of the ride I join a group in their mid-20s celebrating their mate’s birthday. We hop on board a hefty industrial passenger transport truck and make our way up the steep, slate-strewn trail. “On a clear day you can see the coast of Ireland and the
A nervous cage fighter chickened out
Isle of Man from up here,” says the instructor, as we wait our turn on the big drop, taking in the magnificent view across the valley and beyond. Before I know it, it’s time. Rigged up and lowered into position, the instructor makes radio calls to the control centre below, where wind speeds are constantly monitored. All is deemed well, and suddenly the safety line is pulled. I jerk into motion, reeling down the wire like a human bomb. I fly close to the edge of the slate cliff and see the turquoise lake open up beneath me. It’s absolutely thrilling, and the minute-long ride is so smooth I just try to take it all in. I come in to land, slowed by shock absorbers on the wire, and grab the instructor’s arm as he reacquaints me with terra firma. That definitely beats a coat hanger and washing line, any day.
A ride on the Little and Big Zippers and quarry tour costs £50pp zipworld.co.uk; ttadventures.co.uk
Perfect pitches: The best camp sites in the UK
SEE TNT’S DAN TAKE ON THE BIG ZIPPER tntmagazine.com/big-zipper-headcam
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DEAL OF THE WEEK ITALY BREAK
A five-night stay in Lake Maggiore with easyJet (easyjet.com; 0843 104 1000). Includes flights and threestar, B&B accommodation at the Hotel Brisino. Departs from London Gatwick on May 31.
JORDAN An eight-day tour costs £285pp (save 35 per cent) with Travel Talk (0208 0998852; traveltalktours.com). Includes fourand three-star accommodation, some meals and visits to Petra and Amman. Includes flights and local payment. Book by May 24. Departs on May 26. GREEK ISLAND Seven nights in Skiathos is £419pp (save £199) with Sunvil Holidays (0208 7584758; sunvil.co.uk). Includes return flights and self-catering studio accommodation at Eleni’s Village. Departs from London Gatwick on May 31. AFRICA A 22-day tour costs £347pp (save 30 per cent) with Absolute Africa (0208 7420226; absoluteafrica.com). Includes camping and dorm accommodation, some meals and visits to Etosha National Park, Spitzkoppe Rock and Cape Town. Excludes flights. Book by June 10. Departs June 17.
> £500 CROATIA An eight-day tour costs £509 (plus free Morocco tour or save 50 per cent) with Travel Talk (traveltalktours.com; 0208 099 8852). Includes boat accommodation, some meals, and visits to Korcula and Hvar. Excludes flights and local payment. Departs from Split on June 1. Book by May 31. THAILAND Nine nights in Bangkok and Koh Samui costs £706pp with STA Travel (statravel.co.uk; 0800 988 0390). Includes return flights from London airports, room-only hostel accommodation at Lub D Bangkok Silom and Nora Lakeview Koh Samui. Valid for travel September 16-October 31. TUNISIA A seven-night night stay costs from £503pp with lowcostholidays.com (0800 111 6271). Includes five-star, all-inclusive accommodation at the El Mouradi Hammamet. Departs from London Gatwick on June 6.
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EGYPT A nine-day Felucca Odyssey tour costs £207pp (save 35 per cent) with Travel Talk (0208 0998852; traveltalktours.com). Includes fiveand four-star accommodation, some meals and visits to Cairo, Giza, Aswan, Edfu Temple, Luxor and more. Excludes flights and local payment. Book by May 24. Departs on May 25. LANZAROTE A seven-night stay is £199pp with lowcostholidays.com (0800 1116271). Includes return flights and three-star, self-catering accommodation at the Hotel Blue Sea Los Fiscos in Puerto Del Carmen. Departs from London Luton on June 9. ROME A two-night stay costs £157pp with easyJet Holidays (easyjet.com/holidays; 0843 104 1000). Includes direct return flights and four-star, B&B accommodation at the Roma Park hotel. Departs from London Gatwick on June 11. AMSTERDAM A two-night stay is £144pp with lowcostholidays.com (0800 111 6271). Includes direct return flights and four-star, B&B accommodation at the Blue Tower Hotel. Departs from London Southend on May 21. BARCELONA Two nights costs £164pp with lowcostholidays.com (0800 111 6271). Includes direct return flights and five-star, room-only accommodation at the ME Barcelona. Departs from London Stansted on June 3.
£250 – £500
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PATRICIA MONTENEGRO Talks travel photography
3-DAY TOUR OF SCOTLAND + PHOTOGRAPHY COURSE
Email your images to email@example.com First prize is a three-day tour of Scotland for two worth £218 from Haggis Adventures (haggisadventures.com). Must be taken within three months of receiving prize letter. The runner-up wins a £60 photography course voucher from Nigel Wilson Photography (photographycourses.org.uk).
AMMERSEE AT DUSK Patricia Schneider, Augsburg, Germany
PASSIONATE PADLOCKS OF PRAGUE Rayne Small, Tuncurry, Australia
WHY IT WORKS London-based Patricia tells us she took this photo at the Ammersee (or Lake Amer in English) when she was about to return from a visit to her family in nearby Augsburg. “We were watching the sunset from that pier and when I saw the sun about to disappear behind the clouds I just felt like I needed to capture the moment,” she says. “I like the picture because it is so deep and calming – you just start dreaming while watching it.” We also like how the clean lines of the pier and the horizon counteract.
WHY IT WORKS Lovers’ bridges are all over the world, but this one in Prague is certainly well attended judging by its jammed-on padlocks. Rayne came across this one running over a canal in Velkoprevorske Namesti. If you look closely, you’ll also see a statue of a lonely fisherman telling this contrasting story. “I wanted to blur the statue of the fisherman and have the pier running centrally through the image, so I used a lower aperture to bring the eye to focus on the padlocks with a low ISO to reduce noise,” he says.
WHERE IN THE WORLD?
A TRIP FOR TWO TO BATH & STONEHENGE
Going away somewhere soon? Send us a horizontal photo of yourself with a copy of TNT from anywhere around the world and, if we print it, you’ll win a trip for two to Bath and Stonehenge with Anderson Tours, valued at £104! » Email your pictures to ontheroad@ tntmagazine.com along with your name, where you’re from and where the photo was taken, or see tntmagazine.com/world. Files must be at least 500Kb.
Kellie Insch, from Mackay, Australia TNTMAGAZINE.COM
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It’s one of those ‘must do it before I’m 25/30/40/dead’ (delete as appropriate) trips on everyone’s bucket list – an African safari adventure. Prowling big cats, toothy crocs, thundering elephants and many more of their exotic neighbours make a visit to the continent a once-in-a-lifetimer. Tanzania is considered one of the top picks for a safari all-rounder, especially if you’ve got a long list of must-sees to tick off during your trip. For a start, the eastern African country is home to more than five national parks, Africa’s highest peak Mount Kilimanjaro, and the plains of the Serengeti, meaning you’re likely to be as dazzled by the sweeping landscapes as you are by the animals themselves. There’s a decent chance of seeing all of the ‘Big Five’ (buffalo, elephant, lion, leopard and rhinoceros) here in the Serengeti, alongside baboons, antelope and a whole host of other wild critters in their natural environment. One of the most famous Serengeti sights is the famous great migration, when 1.5 million wildebeest and 56 00
around 200,000 zebras move en masse across 1200 miles of grasslands, hills and parks as they follow the rains they need for survival. Their fairly predictable path takes them across the Serengeti and onto Kenya’s Maasai Mara National Reserve. The best time to catch a glimpse of this natural phenomenon in Tanzania is the short rainy season of November and December, and for many travellers, seeing those herds of wildebeest stampede is the hands-down highlight of the trip. Another Tanzanian safari hotspot is the Ngorongoro Crater, the site of a huge volcano that collapsed millions of years ago. Lake Magadi stretches along the lowest part of the crater, and here you’ll be able to see thousands of pink flamingos splashing about in the water. Sound like somewhere you want to be? Start saving, and make sure to fit it in before that bucket list deadline. tanzaniatouristboard.com
TOP 5 SAFARIS GONE WRONG VIDEOS tntmagazine.com/safari-video-virals
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Is there ever a gloomy, drizzly, miserable day in the Seychelles? Are you kidding? No postcard or holiday brochure could do the 115 islands in the Indian Ocean justice, with their pristine white sands, bright blue sea and endless, gently swaying palms. Best of all, there are so many to choose from, most beaches here never get overcrowded, meaning it could be just you, paradise and a pina colada. Fancy it? seychelles.travel
Photos: Thinksotck; Getty
maasai Tribes, kenya
The Maasai tribespeople are well known for their distinctive look, with massive ear piercings and bright red traditional dress. Getting a chance to learn about the lifestyle of this semi-nomadic people could include anything from watching one of the famous jumping dances, trying the local cuisine or finding out about their traditional cattle farming practises. Make sure to choose a community-conscious, sustainable tour operator to visit with. maasaimara.com
Table Mountain, South Africa
The imposing, flat-topped natural wonder, Table Mountain, is one of Africa’s most iconic sights. Looming large over sunny Cape Town, this giant is scalable by foot if you’ve got the puff or by cable car if you fancy treating yourself to an easy ride. Once you get up to the top, there are winding paths to explore and the sprawling city to gaze down at. Check the weather before you go as the cable car doesn’t run in strong winds. tablemountain.net
Victoria Falls, ZAMBIA
On the Zambezi River, bordering Zambia and Zimbabwe, Victoria Falls is one of the seven natural wonders of the world. The sight’s indigenous name, Mosioa-Tunya, should give you some idea of the drama of this spectacle, as it literally means “the smoke that thunders”, with an average flow of one million litres per second. If you’re brave enough to get involved, you can bungee jump, white water raft, jet boat, kayak, canoe and horseback ride through the waters near the foot of the falls.
the gallivant Overview This hotel is the epitome of seaside cool. There are retro photos of beach scenes on the walls, smooth pebbles on the bedside tables and the shabby-chic wooden furnishings throughout look as though they could have been swept into the rooms at high tide. In other words, you get the impression that some surfer-cum-designer has had an absolute blast thinking up all the beachy quirks. It’s a short walk to the shore at Camber Sands, so you get everyone staying here from watersports fanatics keen on the top-notch kitesurfing conditions to those who are just taking a weekend breather from London (it’s just 90 minutes by train). wow factor Beach Bistro, the hotel’s sunny, comfortable cafe-restaurant is somewhere you could accidentally end up spending half your weekend sitting around in, especially after a few glasses of wine and one of their famed fish finger sandwiches. Rooms Light and airy. The weathered old paperbacks in each room are a nice touch and relaxing read. Bill PLease From £125pn.
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THE INSIDER: MALAYSIA
Morocco’s Tangier is an easy ferry ride from Spain’s south
MARK LANKESTER Group CEO Tune Hotels
YOU ASKED FOR IT... LAURA LINDSAY FROM LONELY PLANET
Q I’ll be in southern Spain this summer and was thinking of taking the ferry to Morocco to experience the African continent. However, time is limited. What is the best way to fill two or three days, considering I’ll need to start/finish in the port? Thanks! Cam, via email A There are a couple of routes between
READERS’ TIPS ON VOLUNTOURISM DON’T SPEND TOO MUCH There’s something wrong if it’s setting you back thousands to go and help out somewhere, especially if that money is going to a middleman. Book directly with a charity so no one gets ripped off. Elliot Spencer, via email GET IN SHAPE If the project involves lots of physical labour, make sure you’re in reasonable shape, or you’ll slow everyone down... Bertie Montegue, via email 60
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Spain and Morocco to choose from, Cam. Ferries depart from two ports on Spain’s most southerly point, Tarifa and Algeciras, and arrive in Morocco at either Tangier or the SpanishMoroccan enclave of Ceuta. Ceuta is a great option for a couple of days as the town is compact and full of interesting attractions. The charming centre Plaza de Africa is a great example of the town’s historic
architecture, which dates back to the 18th and 19th centuries, plus there’s a maritime park there with a huge lagoon, two salt water pools, restaurants and cafes. However, if you want to see the real Morocco and experience north African culture in a limited period of time, Tangier is arguably a more appealing destination. The old walled city and its maze of alleyways juxtaposed with the modern city of the Ville Nouvelle gives a great introduction to Morocco. Get lost in the ancient medina, admire the Grand Socco, the large square at the medina’s entrance, stroll around the Mendoubia Gardens and people watch from one of 800-plus cafes. With a direct ferry route from Tarifa to the convenient Tangier Port at the centre of town, this is a great option for your short break.
Where’s the best beach in Malaysia? For the best beaches try standalone islands, such as the Perhentians and Redang. Acres of fine, silky sand and beach living. How about Kuala Lumpur – what’s your favourite nightspot? There are lots of great nightspots in the heart of KL, but for a late night snack after a night out I’d suggest trying Mungo Jerry Bak Kut Teh for wild boar curry, steaming hot soups and fritters. What’s been your most memorable experience in the country? Visiting the Kuala Gandah elephant sanctuary in Pahang and swimming with a four-tonne elephant. tunehotels.com
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Popular Portugal: prime time in Lagos
Party time: sunset beats in Ibiza Super blue: Croatiaâ€™s amazing Adriatic
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Hit the beach Swaying palms, pumping parties, surf breaks and endless stretches of baking hot sand are all within three hours’ flight Words Helen Elfer
Sure, London’s ace when it’s sunny. But sometimes, when the temperatures start sizzling, all you really wish for is soft sand to push your toes into, and bright blue water to jump in. Luckily, you can rest happy in the knowledge that there are a whole host of sensational beaches within three hours’ journey from the Big Smoke – and let’s face it, we’ve had bad commutes that took longer than that. So hop on a plane and before you know it, you’ll be soaking up some rays, getting your surf on and sod it, even ordering a pina colada in a coconut, if that’s what tickles your fancy (note: this is only an acceptable drinks order if you’re actually on a beach). Here’s our top pick of the best European beaches that are practically on your doorstep.
Best for partying: Ibiza, Spain If by ‘holiday’ you mean ‘excuse to crack open your first beer of the day before noon’ then you’d better head for one of the planet’s top party destinations – Ibiza. Some people choose to stay in quieter parts of the island for relaxed days before heading into Ibiza Town at night to hit superclubs Pacha, Space and various other hedonistic hotspots. But if you’re one of those round-the-clock types, Playa d’en Bossa is the beach for you. Lined with trendy beach clubs and cafecum-bars, you can have cocktails delivered to your lounger from many locations along the beach. This is also the home of infamous beach club Bora Bora, where there’s a party atmosphere with drinking, dancing and DJs from midday onwards. Events often serve as both pre-party and afterparty, depending on how many vodka-Red-Bulls you put away. Expect to tie one on with clubbers still going strong from the night before, or getting an early start. FLIGHT TIME: Two hours and 15 minutes. GET THERE: Fly from London Gatwick to Ibiza from £130 return with easyJet (easyJet.com). MORE: ibiza.travel; boraboraibiza.net
But don’t be alarmed if all you’ve got are ratty old togs. All you really need to enjoy yourself is a good thick towel so you can make yourself comfy on those pesky pebbles while you enjoy the textbook Mediterranean view of palm trees, glistening blue sea and boats a-plenty. FLIGHT TIME: One hour and 50 minutes. GET THERE: Fly from London Gatwick to Nice from £46 return with easyJet (easyJet.co.uk). MORE: nicetourisme.com
Best for surfing: Lagos, Portugal Surfers flock to the southwest of the Algarve each year because, within a small region, there’s enough variety of beach, reef and point breaks to suit anyone – perfect if you’re travelling with mates of mixed surfing ability. It’s turned into a bit of a party hotspot too, with fin-jockeys rocking up at the start of the summer to stay for months on end, hitting the waves by day and bars of the small town by night. Lots of surf schools and camps have set up over the past few years, and many offer tours of the top surf spots for first-timers to ››
Best for sunbathing: Nice, France The Baie des Anges (Bay of Angels) is where healthy skin cells come to die. Beautiful, deeply tanned bodies sprawl out along the coast, slathered in SPF-nothing sun oil from morning to sunset. It’s a proper poser’s beach – you’ll see Missoni bikinis, Tom Ford trunks, Gucci sunglasses and a whole other array of designer beachwear on display here.
Back off: topless sun worshippers tntMagazine.com
the area, so ask around when you arrive. Praia do Amado is one of the most popular surfer’s beaches because of the consistent break, courtesy of the wind protected beach. It’s a recommended spot for beginners and lots of surf camps are based nearby too. FLIGHT TIME: Two hours and 25 minutes. GET THERE: Fly from London Luton to Faro with Monarch Airlines from £212 return (monarch.co.uk). MORE: lagosuncovered.com
bizarre beaches Pay these surreal coastlines a visit
Best for scenery: Bol, Croatia Heading to Croatia for gorge-your-eyes coastal scenery is always a safe bet. With nearly 2000 miles of coastline, and thousands of islands, you really do have your pick of beautiful beaches. Zlatni Rat on the island of Brac is something special, a V-shaped golden beach (the name means ‘Golden Horn’), which juts out 634m into the Adriatic. Because of its position, the shape of the beach shifts with the tide, currents and wind, so technically speaking, a fresh view will greet you every morning. And if all the sensational scenery isn’t enough of an eyeful, remember that the westernmost edge of the beach is ‘clothing optional’. If you’re on an island-hopping trip, a great stop further south of the country is the Great Beach (Vela Plaza) at Baska, Krk island. This has heaps of little coves for those wanting to steer clear of crowds and also has a decent nightlife – think lazy cocktail lounges and al fresco restaurants. FLIGHT TIME: Two hours and 35 minutes. GET THERE: Fly from London Gatwick to Split from £98 return with easyJet (easyjet.com). MORE: croatia.hr
Best for waterports: Costa del Sol, Spain Jet skiing, wakeboarding, tubing, parasailing ... do you like your watersports motor-powered, noisy and very highoctane? Try the Costa del Sol’s Fuengirola, a 7km stretch of sand lined with facilities for all the adrenaline-pumping activities you could ask for. FLIGHT TIME: Two hours and 55 minutes. GET THERE: Fly from London Gatwick to Malaga from £140 return with British Airways (ba.com). MORE: visitcostadelsol.com ❚ CHECK OUT THE BEST OF BRITISH BEACHES tntmagazine.com/best-brit-beaches
Sweet spot: Zlatni Rat’s V-shaped beach
Climb the Giant’s Causeway Had your fill of picture-perfect seasides? Mix things up with a visit to one of these unusual beaches, where the sands are far from golden – there’s even a small chance of running into an angry mythical creature Harbour island, Bahamas The Bahamas have practically become a byword for the kind of beaches that make you sigh wistfully just by thinking about them. But Harbour Island has managed to up the dreamy factor even more, with sands that are a candy floss shade of pink. The soft colour is caused by the tiny particles of red-pink shelled critters called Foraminifera washing up on the beach and mixing in with the white sand. The effect looks likes a scene from a particularly soppy Disney film. harbourislandguide.com giant’s causeway, northern ireland The thousands of interlocked basalt columns on Northern Ireland’s northeastern coast are so uniformly hexaganol they look as though they must have been placed there deliberately. Or, as legend has it, by Irish mythical giant Finn McCool. As the story goes, big Finn was trying to build a sort of bridge to get across the sea to fight a Scottish giant. Other strange rock formations to look out for in this fascinating region are the Giant’s Boot, Giant’s Eyes and Chimney Stacks. discovernorthernireland.com
Photos: Thinkstock; Getty
Vik beach, Iceland There are plenty of weird sights in Iceland, from spurting geysers to steaming geothermal lagoons, but the southern beach of Vik is especially odd. The sands are jet-black and it rains so much that the cliffs, already a lush green, seem to practically glow. It’s so eerily beautiful that, typically of Iceland, a troll legend has sprung up around it. Tall basalt figures sit out to sea, which are said to be trolls that got caught out in the sun. visiticeland.com
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Tree hugger: sun bear numbers have decreased 30 per cent over 30 years
GETTING THERE Fly from London Heathrow to Sabah with Royal Brunei from ÂŁ569 return. bruneiair.com
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Grin and bear it Volunteering to help cute and fluffy threatened sun bears get back to the wild at a conservation camp in Borneo is hugely rewarding Words Tamara Thiessen
WHEN TO GO: Borneo’s climate is hot and humid. Expect No sooner have a couple of volunteers at “Baby sun bears are one of the cutest temperatures in the high 20°Cs the Bornean Sun Bear Conservation Centre animals in the world, yet their habitats and low 30°Cs throughout the (BSBCC) sawn a tyre in two than tawnyare being destroyed by deforestation and lowlands. Rainfall averages about muzzled Mamatai is clambering high and the bears are being brutally killed for 300cm annually and though it rains commercial exploitation,” BSBCC founder rocking happily from her new forest swing. throughout the year, the heaviest I’m watching the fuzzy sun bear’s antics Siew Te Wong tells me as we take a tour of downfall generally occurs between at the BSBCC in Sepilok, in the Malaysian the centre’s grounds, a 58-hectare haven November and April. north of the island of Borneo. Located deep of towering trees, fruit plants and trickling CURRENCY: £1 = MYR 4.6 in the Kabili-Sepilok Forest Reserve, on the streams. Currently a home for 28 rescued (Malaysian ringgit) northern tip of Borneo, I’m here to see firstbears in varying states of rehabilitation, Siew Accommodation: When hand the BSBCC’s volunteer programmes in compares the BSBCC to a human half-way on a volunteering programme with action, as they rehabilitate mistreated sun house as it gives bears a safe passage back the Bornean Sun Bear Conservation into the real world. bears until they’re ready to be reintroduced Centre, camp accommodation and to the wild. “Sadly, many of them have already spent meals are provided. Mamatai is one of the females living in too many years locked up in cages and are the centre’s bear house, which volunteers distressed, but day by day, we strive to bsbcc.org.my from around the world have helped to build. improve their lives and eventually introduce SEE: sabahtourism.com After just a couple of days of work, Malaysian them to the forest once again,” he says. volunteer Hiu Yeat Har has quickly grown attached to the her. After studying the sun bear for a decade, wildlife biologist “Because [Mamatai’s] home is close to the kitchen area, Siew opened the conservation centre in 2010. It’s heavily we see her a lot and she has such a special, almost humanreliant on the work of volunteeers, who usually stay here for like character,” says Hiu. “I see her shake the grill door on two to three months, taking part in activities which can include the enclosure and sense her frustration. I wish she could go anything from mucking out enclosures to building playthings back to the wild and lead a normal life already.” for the bears. On my visit, the team of volunteers who built the At the BSBCC, the battle is on to save the world’s smallest original centre are back on site for a fortnight to create a new bear from extinction – the pint-sized Malayan sun bear, enclosure. The workers, hailing from elsewhere in Malaysia, found only in Southeast Asia, weighs an average 70kg and Australia and the United States, are here through sustainability reaches just one metre in height. They’re named for the organisation Raleigh International (raleighinternational.org). crescent-shaped patch of golden fur on their chests. Today they’re toiling away in 33°C degree heat, clearing paths While Borneo remains a stronghold for their survival, in the jungle, dragging logs and barrows of leaves. the threats of deforestation, poaching and the illegal pet Based at a satellite campsite, they walk for 40 minutes trade are ever-present. When the bears are hunted, their every morning to get to the bear quarters, but even this slog gall bladders, blood, bile and bones are considered to have in the jungle’s 90 per cent-plus humidity doesn’t dampen medicinal qualities, while their paws are used to make a their camaraderie. Amanda, a volunteer from Sandakan, a soup, regarded as a delicacy in countries including Vietnam city 25km east of Sepilok, tells me that everyone’s more than and Japan. happy to just get stuck in. The International Union for Conservation of Nature’s “The team spirit turns chores to fun,” she says. “I’m Bear Specialist Group, which added the sun bear to its ‘red getting to know volunteers who came from around the list of threatened species’ in 2007, says the total sun bear world with a similar aim. They don’t flinch at getting their population has declined by at least 30 per cent in the past hands dirty and work in the scorching sun to make bear ›› three decades. hammocks, swinging tyres and log swings.” tntMagazine.com
Thanks, honey: a volunteer feeds a bear; and (below) building the new enclosure
Photos: Charlie Hoare; Isla MacNeal; Getty
Swingin’: spot orang-utans in the forest Together with staff, teams of volunteers are also busy building hanging bridges from recycled timber and fire hoses, and making tracks through the mud with the terribly useful old tyres. BSBCC project manager, Wai Pak, says volunteers are tackling innumerable tasks. “This morning we did husbandry, including repainting rusted enclosures and collecting dried leaves for the bears, piling up reusable wood materials and greasing bolts on bridges, cleaning drainage and covering the drain area with gravel.” The work is mentally and physically challenging, Australian helper Dawn tells me as she bolts a hammock in place, while leeches are the biggest concern for British volunteer Kate (by the end of the previous day, their teammate Bernice had made “four new firm friends”). But in spite of all the tough aspects of the programme, volunteers do get plenty of perks – not least the chance to live right in the heart of Borneo rainforest, where sightings of orang-utans, macaques and other wildlife are a regular thrill. Kate says: “The day got quite exciting when our team spotted a snake, then an orang-utan, just metres from where we were working.” Of course, getting to spend so much one-on-one time with the sun bears themselves is exhilarating. Breakfast time in the bear house is one of Hiu’s favourite times of day. “Sun bears have very a long tongue which allows them to get their food from deep holes. One of the bears in the new bear house, Bermuda, is served porridge in a wooden ball. It’s always fun to see him eating his porridge with his front feet holding the ball and his long tongue getting the porridge out,” she says. Mucking out the bear quarters is not a problem, she adds. “Some may think this job is smelly and disgusting, but most bear poops are not stinky because they eat only vegetables 68
and fruits. We just load it into a barrow and toss it onto the nearby forest floor. We also feed some bears with ginger plants as a food supplement and they love the leaves.” Later in the day, there is much excitement when several of the bear cubs are let loose in their new forest surrounds and start reconnecting with nature. For Damai, a female sun bear cub, it is her first forest walk in some time. Sun bears in the wild spend a lot of their time resting, sleeping and foraging in the rainforest tree canopy, Siew Te
End result: the volunteers’ hard work means the sun bears can get back to the rainforest home where they belong
Wong tells me. He’s particularly excited today as nine-monthold Mary has just started to climb. “At four or five months, sun bear cubs are usually capable of walking, running and climbing, but Mary is not an ordinary cub,” he explains. “A poacher killed her mother when she was about three months old and she was captured and kept as a house pet. Mary was deprived of milk, essential for her growth, and so was short and small when the Sabah Wildlife Department rescued her and sent her here. She still has weak limbs and walks slowly and clumsily, but just now, she was climbing this tree and trying to find food. Even though she failed to find any termites or ants, this is a big step forward for her.” Despite the sadness of the bears’ plight, observing them also brings plenty of laughs. “It’s very entertaining watching the sun bears play with the [apparatus] we have helped
It’s a privilege to be so close to the fluffies
make. One bear, Fulung, did a Cirque du Soleil stunt while swinging on the rope of the tyre swing,” Amanda says. “It was a privilege to be in such close proximity with these fluffies and a great joy to see the evolution of certain bears in my time here. “I will never forget the moment when the youngest cub, eight-month-old Damai, started climbing tall trees and got used to sleeping in them. At first I thought it was special to be one of the first locals to volunteer. Now I think all locals should do the same and learn about this amazing animal. The staff here are not only saving their population, but giving them a second chance to live.” ❚ Two- to three-month stays cost from £1200, covering basic food, accommodation and journey costs through Raleigh International. raleighinternational.org bsbcc.org.my More info at
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