The Bump & Bruise Studio Written and drawn by big T og little t
Publishing house The Little Body Factory
The Bump & Bruise Studio The Bump & Bruise Studio
Written and drawn by big T og little t Copyright 2008 Tommy Linnebjerg Bærentzen, Thomas Thingstrup og Anette Thingstrup Første udgave. 1. oplag Typograﬁsk tilrettelægninig: Tommy Linnebjerg Bærentzen Trykt hos xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Printed in xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 2009
Albert looked at himself in the mirror. As he gazed at his reﬂection he didn’t know whether he should laugh or cry. Maybe he should cry because it really hurts where he has a huge bump on his forehead. Then maybe he should laugh and smile because the lump swelling up is the prettiest colour ever. It’s a genuine work of art right in the middle of his forehead. The bump appeared about 5 minutes ago when he banged his head on the tabletop. He had been crawling into his new secret pirate cave under the kitchen table when it had happened. The table must have shrunk since yesterday, when it had been a dangerous bears den. It’s strange thought Albert, where did that bump come from.
He’s pretty sure there wasn’t one on the tabletop when he hit his head. It’s not the ﬁrst time Albert has got a big bump, but he still has no idea where they come from.
While Albert is wondering where bumps come from, a little bearded man is whistling his way along the dark, twisty paths between Albert’s forehead and his brain, back towards the Bump & Bruise Studio in the Little Body Factory. It is the sculptor Bumpchenko, who originally came from a little country called Bruiselava which lies down in Albert’s big toe. Bumpchenko has a small studio in the attic of the Little Body Factory, which he shares with his two artist friends, Mr Black and Mr Blue. Bumpchenko is whistling because he is very happy, and he is happy because he has just ﬁnished a beautiful new sculpture as big as a ping pong ball and as red as a ripe tomato. The sculpture is so good that it has been displayed in the most prominent place of all. Right in the middle of Albert’s forehead.
Bang !!! Bang !!! Bang !!! Bang !!!
Making the sculpture was quite easy. What was much more difﬁcult was mounting it on display on Albert’s forehead. Using his favourite lump hammer, Bumpchenko took aim and with a huge swing, hammered the sculpture into place inside Albert’s forehead with a big bang. “Ouch” cried Albert when the bump was put into place. It had hurt a little bit, but Bumpchenko knew that Albert would be both happy and proud to have such a ﬁne bump. Soon it would be bought by an art museum and put on display on other children’s foreheads, or knees, or elbows.
“Aren’t you going to go and see the bump on Albert’s forehead” Bumpchenko said excitedly to Mr Black and Mr Blue as he arrived back at the Bump & Bruise Studio.
He had been a little afraid that it would be so hard to hang his masterpiece that no-one would ever see it. But now it was displayed and looked truly wonderful. He hoped that everyone would want to see it. When Albert screamed “Ouch” , his Mum and Dad came running over to see what had happened. They gave him loads of hugs and kisses and fussed all over him with so much ice cream and sweets, that Albert felt like a star from a TV programme. Actually all the best TV channels came and recorded live interviews with him all day.
Albert’s Grandma and Granddad eventually heard about the bump.
.. . t uu u u Pru
They were in a faraway land called Bullabulla to visit and learn about nature from an ancient tribe called the Bone-inthe-nose tribe. Grandma and Granddad had been there many times before and usually never wanted to leave. But as soon as they heard about Albert’s beautiful new bump they caught the ﬁrst elephant bus home to view this rare work of art.
“WOOOWWW WOOOWWW” squealed the excited Bumpchenko when he saw the amazing bruise Mr Blue had painted while he had been out hanging his bump. “How did you ﬁnd such a beautiful blue colour” Bumpchenko asked Mr Blue curiously. “Well” said Mr Blue, “I was out taking a walk in Albert’s sinuses when I took a wrong turn, and right in front of me were Albert’s two blue eyes. There is a wonderful view from up there. I had never seen such a lovely blue colour before, so I quickly got my brush out, dipped it into the eye and used the blue colour to paint a beautiful blue bruise for Albert’s new bump” .
Bumpchenko asked excitedly if he had enough blue left over to paint a new bruise for the artistic bump he had recently exhibited on Sophie’s knee. Mr Blue was so ﬂattered to be asked for a special bruise by Mr Bumpchenko, that he beamed with joy and quickly started preparing for his second masterpiece of the day.
Bruises on knees are some of the hardest to ďŹ x into place. Mr Blue is lowered on a rope held by three especially strong workers from the Bogey Mill. They are the strongest workers in the Little Body Factory. They dangle him next to the knee while he carefully paints the ďŹ ne blue bruise.
Mr Black stood shyly behind Mr Blue as he was rather timid.
“OOHHHH isn’t that beautiful” said Bumpchenko when he saw what Mr Black had been painting. “I have never seen such a ﬁne miniature as this” . Mr Black felt very embarrassed. Quickly Mr Blue got out his paintbrush and painted Mr Black’s face bright red. “There now, we can all see that you are blushing with pride” Mr Blue said. Mr Black told the others that he was very happy and that he liked his little dot, so much so that he planned to paint lots of them all together, which would look even more beautiful.
After Bumpchenko’s bump had been on Albert’s forehead for a week, Mr Blue was allowed to exhibit a ﬁne new green bruise on it. Everyone at the Little Body Factory agreed that it was another incredible masterpiece. Albert’s family all agreed that it was one of the ﬁnest exhibitions they had ever seen, and said that the new green colour looked familiar somehow. Mr Blue had mixed the lovely green colour from Albert’s snot.
What, you are probably wondering, happened to Mr Black’s little dots ?
Well Mr Black was very pleased to be given a summer exhibition with all his dots exhibited all together. They looked so beautiful that they were given the biggest space they could ﬁnd, all over Albert’s face. The exhibition was so popular it was displayed all summer long.
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Are you ready for some fun exploration? Get in your car and drive into your mouth. After a few centimetres take the passage to the right-that way you will avoid your dinner from yesterday. Keep going past your lungs past your heart and into your stomach. Here you’ll ﬁnd the Little Body Factory. It is difﬁcult to hear and feel the Little Body Factory. But if you listen carefully, you can hear the sounds from all the workers who are busy shaping new bogeys or reﬁlling tear bottles, baking scabs, editing dreams, putting bruises on sore knees or one of other fantastic things that your body does. If you do see the Little Body Factory, then be quiet and don’t tell anyone... ...otherwise the workers may be too distracted to deliver a really good fart with a funny noise.
Publishing house The Little Body Factory