Sook: And Ye Shall Find HOW’S THAT AGAIN? After the big BBQ, Shirlene Sook complained that Jimmy didn’t seem to like her family. “Now, Shirlene, that’s not fair. I don’t hate your relatives,” replied Jimmy. “In fact, I like your motherin-law lots better than I like mine.” HUH? Jimmy Sook asked Arly to check in the newspaper for tomorrow’s weather forecast. “Man, I can’t figure this out!” exclaimed Arly. “It says it’s going to be twice as cold tomorrow as it was today.” “So? How cold was it today?” “Zero.” JIMMY SLEEPS ON HIS BOAT AGAIN Jimmy Sook’s mother-in-law, Melfa Bivalve, was on the Island all last week, visiting with her daughter Shirlene and grandson Oswald. S h i r l e n e ’s m o m i n s i s t e d o n preparing the Friday night dinner, even though cook ing had never been her strong suit. As they began eating, the family offered polite compliments on the meal. Smiling, Miss Melfa nodded and said, “Yes, I reckon the two things I cook best are meat loaf and apple pie.” “Which one is this?” asked Jimmy.
Ji m my ’s w i fe Sh i rlene m ade regular appearances. She was a hardworking gal, sometimes waiting tables at the Bridge Restaurant. A good wife and mother, Shirlene was always looking out for her family. SHIRLENE SOOK GETS STEAMED Shirlene Sook marched into the Church Annex last week to speak with Miss Ida, the Sunday School teacher. “Hello, Shirlene. How can I help you?” “Well, Miss Ida, I don’t mean to tell you how to teach your Sunday School class, but I really don’t like what I heard from my son Oswald. “Why, what did he say, dear?” “He said you were teaching them about a constipated cross-eyed bear. Well, I mean! That just doesn’t seem right to me!” declared Shirlene, looking a bit f lushed.
Tidewater Times April 2018