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There is no shortage of lawsuits. Lawyers keep busy defending weird and wacky cases. Tidbits looks at a few frivolous lawsuits for a laugh, but don’t try them yourself! Frivolous lawsuits rarely make it through the courts and usually end up costing the plaintiff. ➧ Richard Overton took the advertising message of Anheuser-Busch a bit too literally. In 1991, he sued the company for $10,000 claiming to have suffered emotional distress, mental injury and financial loss because drinking Anheuser-Busch beer did not bring to life the beautiful women in tropical settings as was advertised. The supposed false advertising led him to buy and drink more Bud Light. The case was dismissed. ➧ An episode of “Fear Factor� prompted Austin Aitken to sue NBC for $2.5 million in 2005. Aitken claimed to have suffered injury and great pain after watching contestants on the television eat rats. This caused him to become light-headed and dizzy, which resulted in him vomiting and running into a doorway. The judge threw out the lawsuit. ➧ In 2006, Allen Heckard sued Michael Jordan and Nike founder Phil Knight for $832 million. In the suit he claimed to suffer defamation, permanent injury and emotional pain and suffering because he was often mistaken for Michael Jordan. He said that continual public harassment because of the alleged resemblance “has troubled his nerves.� Heckard dropped the lawsuit later that year. ➧ After eating Cap’n Crunch with Crunch Berries over a period of four years, Janine Sugawara realized that the “Crunch Berries� in the cereal were not real fruit. She filed a class-action suit against Quaker’s parent company PepsiCo in 2009 for fraud and breech of warranty, seeking full restitution of all (continued on page 4)


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August 13–19, 2011

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Canned Vegetables Senior News Line Are Better Than None by Matilda Charles Did you know it’s possible to suffer from malnutrition even if you’re eating three times a day? That can happen easily to seniors who find it hard to be motivated to cook and end up just snacking throughout the day. A changing sense of smell and taste, loneliness after the death of a spouse, medications and boredom are a few of the reasons we don’t eat as well as we should. But with a little ingenuity, it’s easy to fix fast, easy meals you’ll actually eat! Here are some ideas: • Use your slow cooker. All the ingredients are assembled in the pot in the morning, and are ready by dinnertime. • The variety of cookbooks on the market is amazing. Investigate cookbooks that offer recipes with only five ingredients, diabetic recipes, meals that take less than 20 minutes to prepare, and prepared foods combined with your own easy additions. • Double the amounts you prepare, and freeze the rest for days when you really don’t want to cook at all. Be sure to label the container and use it within a few weeks. • If income allows, consider ordering one week of a

/14 National Navajo Code Talkers Day 8 8/15 National Relaxation Day 8/16 National Airborne Day 8/17 National Thrift Shop Day 8/18 Cupcake Day 8/19 World Humanitarian Day 8/20 World Daffodil Day Magic Johnson...........8/14/1959 Ben Affleck................8/15/1972 Nigel Williams............8/16/1971 Ed Cunningham.........8/17/1969 Tracy Tracy.................8/18/1967 Orville Wright............8/19/1871 Al Roker.....................8/20/1954

Š 2011 King Features Synd., Inc. plan where meals are delivered to your door. While the cost would be prohibitive to do this constantly, having a few meals in the freezer would be handy for those times you don’t want to cook. • Take a cooking class and learn steps to fix quick meals. • Ask your doctor for a referral to a nutritionist if you need help with creating a menu, portion sizes and nutritional values. If you’re truly stuck in a not-cooking rut, in a pinch, remember: Canned fruit and vegetables are better than none at all. Peanut butter on crackers with a banana offers nutrition. It takes only a few minutes to scramble eggs, add cheese and make toast. Matilda Charles regrets that she cannot personally answer reader questions, but will incorporate them into her column whenever possible. Write to her in care of King Features Weekly Service, P.O. Box 536475, Orlando, FL 32853-6475, or send e-mail to

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August 13–19, 2011 

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by Freddy Groves

Agent Orange Payments Shift into High Gear

All across the country, Veterans Benefits Administration claims personnel are working to process the mountain of paperwork as a result of the Nehmer case. The upshot of Nehmer v. U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs is that the VA must re-adjudicate claims it denied in the past for the three newest presumptive illnesses for Agent Orange exposure. They are Ischemic Heart Disease, Parkinson’s Disease and certain leukemias. This covers claims filed or denied from Sept. 25, 1985 to Aug, 31, 2010, which is the date the service connection was established. Now that the VA is under a court-ordered gun, the process must be completed by Oct. 1, 2011. Here are some of the differences between a standard claim and one falling under this new ruling, taken

from the training manual for new staff: Current: Goes by the claim date. Nehmer: No new claim need be filed if a presumptive illness appeared or was denied. Staff is to find the illness in your records and use that date. Current: Benefits do not go to the estate of a deceased veteran. Nehmer: Benefits survive the entitled member’s estate. Marriage license and birth certificates may be required. Current: Payments are made when possible. Nehmer: Payments must be made within 21 days of verification of entitlement. To learn more about the specifics, go to www.nvlsp. org, which is the national Veterans Legal Services Program. Search for “Nehmer Training Guide,” which includes a letter and the manual. You’ll find dates and locations in the manual, as well as a list of vessels documented to have been at the shore or inland. You’ll also find a list of documents that can be used as evidence, such as TDY orders, shore-leave orders in writing and other documentation that shows the veteran “physically set foot” in the country.

* * *

Write to Freddy Groves in care of King Features Weekly Service, P.O. Box 536475, Orlando, FL 32853-6475, or send e-mail to © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.

Summer Fruit Ice Cream Pie by Healthy Exchanges

What a great way to savor the special fruits of summer. Stir this pie up before those juicy jewels are nothing more than a pleasant memory. Everyone invited to share this spectacular summer dessert will be glad you did!

INGREDIENTS 1 (4-serving) package sugar-free vanilla cook-and-serve pudding mix 2/3 cup nonfat dry milk powder 1 cup water 1 (8-ounce) package fat-free cream cheese 1 teaspoon vanilla extract 1 (6-ounce) purchased graham cracker pie crust 1 cup sliced fresh strawberries 3/4 cup fresh blueberries Sugar substitute to equal 2 tablespoons sugar 1/2 cup reduced-calorie whipped topping DIRECTIONS 1. In a medium saucepan, combine dry pudding mix, dry milk powder and water. Cook over medium heat until

mixture thickens and starts to boil, stirring often. Remove from heat. Blend in cream cheese and vanilla extract, using a wire whisk. Spread mixture into pie crust. Refrigerate at least 3 hours. 2. In a medium bowl, combine strawberries, blueberries and sugar substitute. Evenly sprinkle fruit mixture over top of filling. Refrigerate until ready to serve. When serving, top each piece with 1 tablespoon whipped topping. Makes 8 servings. s Each serving equals: 178 calories, 6g fat, 7g protein, 24g carb., 395mg sodium, 2g fiber; Diabetic Exchanges: 1 1/2 Starch, 1/2 Meat, 1/2 Fat. * * * © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.

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ARIES (March 21 to April 19) You sometimes go to extremes to prove a point. But this time, you won’t have to. Supporters are ready, falling over themselves to help you make your case. TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) Venus might be your ruling planet, but Mars is in the picture as well. So don’t be surprised if your romantic relationships are a bit rocky at this time. But they’ll soon smooth over. GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) Geminis might rush into romance and risk being wrong about someone rather than be left with no one. But this is one time when it’s wiser to be wary of where your heart takes you. CANCER (June 21 to July 22) With all (or most) of those pesky problems behind you, take time for your family and friends. Travel aspects are favored, with long-distance journeys high on the list. LEO (July 23 to August 22) You might have started to question the wisdom of being open with someone you hoped you could trust. But be assured you won’t be disappointed. You’ll soon hear good news. VIRGO (August 23 to September 22) You have a reputation for honesty and integrity, and that will help turn around a situation that was not only disappointing but also quite unfair. Good luck. LIBRA (September 23 to October 22) A happy event creates a closer tie with a family member who seemed hopelessly estranged. Positive aspects also dominate in important career matters. SCORPIO (October 23 to November 21) Your ruling planet, Pluto, helps you adjust to change. So, stop putting off that long-delayed move, and make it with the assurance that you’re doing the right thing. SAGITTARIUS (November 22 to December 21) You have a wonderful capacity to learn quickly and well. This will help you when you are faced with an opportunity to move on to a new path in life. CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 19) Good news: You suddenly find that you’re not facing that new challenge alone. You now have someone at your side, ready to offer whatever support you might need. AQUARIUS (January 20 to February 18) Your versatility — which is just one of those aspects of yourself that make you so special — helps you adapt to the challenges of a new and exciting opportunity. PISCES (February 19 to March 20) Your sensitive nature picks up on the needs of others. But what about your desires? You need to take more time to assess what your goals are and, if necessary, redirect them. YOU BORN THIS WEEK: You give your trust openly and easily. People find you easy to be with and enjoy your wit, your good sense, and your capacity to love and be loved. * * * © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.

BIBLE TRIVIA ANSWERS 1) Neither; 2) Absalom; 3) Elisha; 4) Nicodemus; 5) Jacob; 6) Michal Answer




1. He had 131 runs scored in 2006. 2. Randy Jones of the San Diego Padres, in 1976. 3. Joe Montana (three), Bart Starr (two), Terry Bradshaw (two) and Tom Brady (two). 4. Three times — 1962, 1968 and 2010. 5. Fifteen times starting with the 1992-93 season, and only twice before then. 6. He was 61. 7. The 2009 Australian Open (top seed Rafael Nadal vs. No. 2 Roger Federer).



HOCUS FOCUS DIFFERENCES 1. Man has no tie. 2. Window sign is different. 3. Boy’s pants are black. 4. Barbershop pole is black-and-white. 5. Man’s hat is gone. 6. Bottle is different.



Tidbits® of Hilton Head, Bluffton, and Beaufort 

LAWSUITS (continued): money gained through misleading labeling and a court order forcing Quaker to disclose to the public the true composition of Crunch Berries. The case was dismissed. ➧ In 1910, Olaf Olverson was desperate for cash, so he sold his body to the Karolinska Institute in Stockholm, Sweden, for medical research after his death. A year later, he inherited a fortune. He tried to “buy himself back” from the institute, but they wouldn’t cooperate. When Olverson refused to donate his body, the institute sued him for breach of contract. Olverson lost the case. The judge ruled that he not only owed his body to the Institute, he owed them money for the two teeth he had removed without the Institute’s permission, saying Olverson had illegally tampered with their property. ➧ Bobby Mackey’s Music World in Wilder, Kentucky, was sued by J.R. Costigan in 1993. He claimed a ghost “punched and kicked him” while he was using the bar’s restroom one night. He sued the bar for $1,000 in damages and demanded that a warning sign of the ghost’s presence be put up in the restroom. The club’s lawyer filed a motion to dismiss the case, citing the difficulty of getting the ghost into court to testify for the defense. The case was dismissed. ➧ In 1976, at the University of California Los Angeles Medical Center, doctors removed John Moore’s spleen in a successful effort to cure his cancer. Doctors later found that the spleen possessed unique cancer-fighting cells. Experiments

Do-It-Yourself Credit Repair If you’ve been through a rough financial patch, it’s likely that your credit has suffered. Late payments, minimumonly payments, credit-card balances that are too high and maybe even auto repossession could have drastic impacts on your credit score. If you’re in a better position now, possibly with a new or better job, your credit can be repaired. It will take time, but it can be done. Here’s how: First, find out how bad the damage is. Send for your credit reports from all three of the major credit bureaus. Go over them carefully. Look for mistakes, such as accounts that aren’t yours, wrong credit limit listed and accounts that you have already paid off showing a current balance. Notify the credit bureaus in writing (certified mail, not online) about any errors, and ask for an investigation. They have 30 days to respond. If they can’t verify the accuracy of the item, they have to remove it. Once the repairs are made, get another batch of credit reports and do a line-by-line comparison. Next, make a plan to hone down your credit. Determine which of your credit cards has the biggest debt-toavailability ratio. A card with $1,000 availability and a $900 balance is worse than a card with $10,000 availability and only $2,000 owed. The reason is that nearly maxing out a card counts more heavily against you because a larger percentage of your available credit is used. Don’t cancel any cards, for the above reason. When you get a card down to a zero balance, that availability helps your overall percentages. (History helps: Keep old accounts open, if only for the longevity they show.) Pay more than the minimum on each card, on time, every month, with more money going to the ones with higher percentages of available credit used. Look at the credit report: You’ll see a column indicating whether you have been making minimum or better payments. Even $10 extra takes you out of the “minimum only” category. Don’t take on any new credit until the current problems are resolved. Full credit repair will take time, but it’s worth the aggravation. The biggest benefit to taking steps to repair your credit is that future credit will be cheaper. You won’t be in the “likely to default” category anymore, saddled with high interest rates. David Uffington regrets that he cannot personally answer reader questions, but will incorporate them into his column whenever possible. Write to him in care of King Features Weekly Service, P.O. Box 536475, Orlando, FL 32853-6475, or send e-mail to © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.

with the cells led to a new discovery worth an estimated $3 billion. Moore tried to sue the University of California, claiming his spleen was pirated. The spleen had belonged to him so he should share in the commercial value. He sued for part of the profits, but in 1990, 14 years after the operation, Moore lost the case. ➧ Computer designers at Apple codenamed a new computer model Sagan in 1993. Traditionally, this is an honor. “You pick a name of someone you respect,” an employee explained, “and the code is only used while the computer is being developed. It never makes it out of the company.” This didn’t matter to Carl Sagan; his lawyers complained that the code was “an illegal usurpation of his name for commercial

August 13–19, 2011 purposes” and demanded that it be changed. The designers changed it to BHA, which stood for “ButtHead Astronomer.” Sagan sued again, contending “Butt-Head” is “defamatory on its face.” Apple won. ➧ Chicago lawyer Frank Zaffere sued his ex-fiancé Maria Dillon when she broke off their engagement in 1992. Zaffere filed a suit for $40,310.48 to cover his “lost courting expenses.” He did send a letter along with court papers to his ex stating: “I am still willing to marry you on the conditions herein below set forth: 1) We proceed with our marriage within 45 days of the date of this letter; 2) You confirm [that you]…will forever be faithful to me; 3) You promise…that you will never lie to me again about (continued on page 8)

August 13–19, 2011 

For Advertising Call: 843-368-2997 


To Crate or Not to Crate? By Sam Mazzotta

QUESTION: What’s your view of kennel cages? My wife hates the idea of using one to train our dog Sandy, but I disagree. What do you say? — Jerry in Las Cruces, N.M. ANSWER: I’m personally OK with the concept of crating (or “kennel cages”). It’s an effective way to housetrain a puppy (who won’t soil a sleeping or living area) and teaches it to stay comfortable and relaxed in a similar container, the travel crate, which is essential to traveling with your dog. However, I do see frequent instances where the crate is misused, with negative consequences for dog and owner alike. The crate also serves as a home or den for your dog. So it always has to be seen by Sandy as a safe place to be, perhaps the safest place in the house for her. If you use the crate to punish Sandy, such as shutting her up in it when she’s being hyperactive

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or disobedient, she could associate it with negative feelings and avoid going into it. I recommend you learn as much as you can about using the crate to train Sandy. The American Dog Trainers Network has a list of tips on furnishing the crate, getting her to accept it and using it as a positive training tool. Find the list here: http://www. It also includes important safety tips, such as always removing Sandy’s collar before putting her into the crate, and making sure she’s not left in an environment that’s too hot or freezing cold.

* * *

Send your question or comment to, or write to Paw’s Corner, c/o King Features Weekly Service, P.O. Box 536475, Orlando, FL 32853-6475. Find more pet advice and resources at © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc. Hours

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Identifying Marks When learning how to identify birds, ask yourself: Does the bird have black or white wing bars? How many? Is there a stripe over the eye? Does it cling like a woodpecker or perch like a cardinal? Is the tail cocked like a mockingbird’s? © 2011 King Features Syndicate, Inc.

TOP TEN DVD SALES as of August 8, 2011   1. Rango (PG) (Paramount)   2. Limitless (PG-13) (Fox)   3. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (PG-13) (Warner)   4. The Lincoln Lawyer (R) (Lions Gate)   5. Insidious (PG-13) (Sony)   6. Arthur (PG-13) (Warner)   7. Unknown (PG-13) (Warner)   8. Take Me Home Tonight (R) (Fox)   9. Gnomeo & Juliet (G) (Buena Vista) 10. Sucker Punch (PG-13) (Warner) Source: Rentrak Corp. © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.

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August 13–19, 2011 

TO YOUR GOOD HEALTH By Paul G. Donohue, M.D.

Acupuncture for Pain Relief DEAR DR. DONOHUE: I have never seen you address acupuncture. I have had a bad back for three months, have seen two doctors and have followed their instructions. I have taken medicines that ease the pain. My back isn’t as sore as it once was, but it still bothers me. Acupuncture has been suggested. What are your views on it? — M.L. ANSWER: I have no misgivings about trying acupuncture for pain relief. The Chinese have used it for centuries. Any treatment that lasts that long must have some value. Fine needles are inserted into the skin at specific points and are left in place for 15 to 30 minutes. From time to time, the acupuncturist stimulates the needles.

For Advertising Call: 843-368-2997  The American College of Physicians and the American Pain Society endorse acupuncture. A recent review article in the New England Journal of Medicine, a premier medical journal, also endorsed it. Who am I not to follow suit? Back pain strikes almost everyone at some point in life. The booklet on it discusses its causes and treatments. Readers can order a copy by writing: Dr. Donohue — No. 303W, Box 536475, Orlando, FL 32853-6475. Enclose a check or money order (no cash) for $4.75 U.S./$6 Canada with the recipient’s printed name and address. Please allow four weeks for delivery. i i i DEAR DR. DONOHUE: It’s that time of year again — the no-see-um season. I can feel a sharp sting when bitten. It goes away and then returns as a large swelling with incessant itching. What can I do to prevent this reaction? Others don’t react this bad. I also use DEET to deter these diabolical pests. Should I wash it off as soon as I get indoors? — C.R. ANSWERS: No-see-ums got that name because they’re barely visible, only 1/16th of an inch. Dawn


and dusk are their busiest hours. Avoidance is the best protection. The red welt you describe arises about 12 or more hours after the bite and can be as large as an inch in diameter. It does itch. DEET is the best repellent, but it’s not a 100 percent barrier for all users. Have you tried a higher concentration? Are you following label directions regarding when to reapply it? When you get back home, wash treated skin with soap and water. Also, you can spray your clothes with permethrin. It will give you additional protection. Wear long slacks tucked into your socks and long-sleeved tops. As for the itch, antihistamines are suggested. I admit they don’t work for everyone. i i i Dr. Donohue regrets that he is unable to answer individual letters, but he will incorporate them in his column whenever possible. Readers may write him or request an order form of available health newsletters at P.O. Box 536475, Orlando, FL 32853-6475. © 2011 North America Synd., Inc. All Rights Reserved

SPABITS By Gwen Santos Beauty may be ageless, but there is a lot to be said for minimizing the effects of time with a professional facial. At the spa, treatment protocols are based on your primary concerns, age, skin type, condition and what goals you have for your skin. A consultation and skin evaluation will assist in determining which treatments are best suited for you and your long term goals. To ensure great skin, an at-home maintenance program bridges the gap between treatments and provides you with a plan of action for younger looking skin. Scheduling more than one treatment at the spa will help you get the most out of your experience. Consult with your therapist about what your goal is such as to relax, detoxify or to beautify. Whichever you choose, remember to share it with a friend, it’s the best girlfriend time ever! Boost your health this summer with these essential tips: • Eat Wholesome Foods For overall wellness, choose organic fruits, nuts and vegetables. Minimize sugar, white flour and processed foods. • Choose The Right Beverages Hydration is vital for most body functions and a healthy drink will have nutritional benefits as well. Choose organic juices, fruit smoothies and iced herbal teas with a twist of lemon or mint leaves. • Get Covered Make sunscreen an essential part of your healthy lifestyle. Organic sun care with anti-aging benefits, provide both sun protection and a healthier future for your skin. To cultivate well-being, strive to live healthfully every day, fitting in a rejuvenating getaway whenever you can, and finding relaxation at your local spa.


Bb Gwen Santos is a Licensed Esthetician, Licensed Cosmetologist, Instructor, Certified Aromatherapist, Professional Make Up Artist and owner of Pretty Woman Day Spa. 843-815-2200

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LAWSUITS (continued): anything.� He closed with: “Please feel free to call me if you have any questions or would like to discuss any of the matters discussed herein. Sincerely, Frank.� The case was dismissed and so was the wedding. ➧ Andrea Pizzo, a former student of the University of Maine, sued her alma mater for failing to protect her from a cow with a “dangerous disposition.� While taking a class in livestock management, a 400-plus-pound Bovine head-butted her into the wall of its pen. Pizzo suffered knee and wrist injuries, so she sued the college for an unspecified amount. In her suit she claims the school “should

August 13–19, 2011 have known that the heifer had a personality problem.â€? Verdict unknown. ➧ Cynthia Economou was sued by Karl Lambert in Florida court; he claimed that Economou stole his foot. Lambert’s foot was severed in a car accident, and Economu, the paramedic on site, took his mangled limb to help in the training of her body recovery dog. In her defense, Economu said, “It was an unrecognizable mass of flesh‌It wasn’t a clean cut. You couldn’t even recognize it as a foot‌If I had thought it was somehow reattachable and usable, I would have gone to my commander.â€? She was charged with second-degree petty theft and received six months of probation.

Menard Dismisses His Critics He has those jaunty sideburns to see. No one doubts it takes considerable ability to that make him look a bit, you win here. know, colorful. Menard has Richard Childress didn’t put Menard in his No. 27 been criticized because his Chevy just because of sponsorship from the father is wealthy and has supported his son’s racing Menard’s chain of home-improvement warehouses. efforts. It didn’t hurt, though. Just who out there would pass that up? “I caught a lot of flak back early last year when we In truth, Menard is quite decided to go with four teams,â€? modest, as reflected in the fact said Childress. “I’ve been that he is quite terse. His watching Paul ever since he answers to questions are won the Nationwide race seldom expansive, and he often (Milwaukee, 2006). He speaks in sentences that aren’t doesn’t wear equipment out. complete. Examples from his He’s consistent. He’s really press conference after winning good. Got a cool head on him Sunday’s Brickyard 400: in all situations. “Can’t change people’s “I knew if the right situation opinions. ‌Can’t control it. came along, we’d win. To get ‌Definitely for him (his dad). ‘Slugger’ (Labbe, Menard’s Thirty-year-old Paul Menard (left) ‌Sitting up in a suite for the got his first victory of his Cup career at crew chief) to come over, John the Indianapolis Motor Speedway on inaugural one (Brickyard 400 Menard support us‌that was July 30. (John Clark/NASCAR in 1994). ‌Saw Rick Mast win a big jump going in on a fourth This Week photo) the pole. ‌Passed a couple team.â€? cars. ‌Just started trying to maintain some kind of Menard bounced around, from Dale Earnhardt Inc. lap time being easy on the throttle, easy off, earlier in 2007-08 and to Richard Petty Motorsports in than normal, easy on.â€? 2009-10. It took Childress to provide him with what You get the point. proved to be a winning combination in one of But anyone who thinks Paul Menard is some NASCAR’s premier races. international playboy, jetting around on his daddy’s * * * Monte Dutton covers motorsports for money, has got it wrong. John Menard was able to The Gaston (N.C.) Gazette. E-mail Monte at make sure his son got the best equipment, but it was Paul who proved he could do the job. Some find Indy boring. Others complain about how hard it is Š 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.

OVERCOMING THE ODDS: Falling from the Sky What would you do if you were in an airplane miles above the earth and the unthinkable happened — the plane breaks apart, and you suddenly find yourself in a free fall? If you were above 10,000 feet, you would quickly loose consciousness due to thin air. When you reached 10,000 feet, you may wake up. A free fall from 35,000 feet would take about three minutes with a landing speed of around 125 miles per hour! (Of course, the time and rate of speed depend on your weight and the amount of air drag created by the position of your body.) The following stories are about two amazing survivors of free-falling experiences. D In April 1944, Pilot Joe Herman of the Royal Australian Air Force and his crew were on a mission to bomb munitions factories at Bochum. After dropping its bombs, the plane was struck by enemy fire. Herman ordered his crew to bail out, but before he could secure his parachute, the plane exploded, and he was thrown into the night air. D As he was falling, he bumped into what he thought was debris. In a panic, Herman grabbed on, but then realized it was the leg of mid-upper gunner, John Vivashand, who at that moment was opening his parachute. The parachute inflated slowly, which helped Herman maintain his firm grasp. The two men came down safely with Herman hitting the ground first. His only injury was two broken ribs. D On Christmas Eve, 1971, LANSA Flight 508 from Lima, Peru, to Pucallpa, Peru, was struck by lightning at 21,000 feet. A fire started, and systems began failing, causing the pilots to loose control of the aircraft. The plane soon went into a dive. D The turbulent forces on the wings caused them to tear away from the aircraft as it came crashing

down into a mountainous region of the Amazon. Amongst the debris, 17-year-old Juliane Margaret Koepcke regained consciousness after an unknown amount of time, still strapped in her seat. D All the other 91 people aboard — six crew members and 85 passengers, including Koepcke’s mother, were dead. Koepcke miraculously sustained only a broken collarbone. She spent the next 10 days alone and lost in the jungle with only a bag of candy for food. D Her father once told her to survive in the jungle, follow water. Koepcke waded from tiny streams to larger ones until on the tenth day, she made it to the bank of the Shebonya River where she saw a canoe tethered to the shoreline. D After climbing up an embankment, she found a hut. As it turned out, it belonged to a group of lumberjacks. They found her the next day. D The incident was seen as a miracle of divine intervention in Peru, and free-fall statistics seem to support this thought. Her story has been the subject of two films, the most recent being a Werner Herzog documentary called “Wings of Hope.�

August 13–19, 2011 

For Advertising Call: 843-368-2997 

The Todd Father I’m trying to relax before they get here, looking over the menu, looking for a quick sip before they do, but can’t. Why? Tommy the bartender is over in the corner talking to server Jessica. Why? Because Jessica is, like, soooooooo mad that Todd just took another one of her tables! And the other server, Tim? He has worked here for soooooooo long and totally could have told you that Todd was going to do that. Oh, and yes…he’s told the owners many times before, but they don’t care! Re-enter Tommy — who at one time had a very noble charge to fill as a bartender — seconds after my in-laws and wife arrive. The only thing I’ve gotten so far is a packet of stale oyster crackers and a real chip on my shoulder for this guy Todd. Sometimes, all I want is an ice-cold martini and a story off the hot stove. It means more when you’re on deadline and sitting at a table nursing a soda with your in-laws. These are the ones who actually planned for their retirement, take time out from their golf game to watch

your kid, and will probably pick up this tab…all in the hopes you won’t end up living in their basement. But tonight, I’m sitting on a scoop, so I’m edgy. And so, to my detriment, decide to hash out my misgivings on breaking the story via text after dinner with a former sportswriter who now works as a “sellout.” Is this lame, or is it my “straw stirs the drink” moment? “You’ve been [that team’s] [pliant submissive] since I met you,” she says, with warmth and encouragement. “Do some original investigation at least.” A furious text stream follows. I am compared to terrible people and hypocrites…disgraced sitcom sidekicks like Boner, Chachi Arcola and the Great Gizzoo. Real belowthe-belt stuff. I respond with a few go-to Godfather references. She swats them down by telling me that obscure Godfather quotes are, by far, the lamest thing a guy can introduce into a conversation with a girl. Yeah, whatever “Kay”…let me know when I’m conversing with a “girl.” The moment I hit “send” I was toast. I texted back: “The next send button I see is going to get wacked.” Never let anybody know what you’re thinking. Moments later, as I was inspecting fruit at a street-side stand, two send buttons pulled up and shot me in the back five times while that guy from Deer Hunter cried on the curb. So my original story went untold. I was scooped, but don’t think vengeance isn’t far from mind: Todd, you will be paying for stealing Jessica’s table.

* * *

Mark Vasto is a veteran sportswriter and publisher of The Kansas City Luminary. © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.

1. I n Michigan, it is illegal to chain what to a fire hydrant? 2. I t is against the law to hunt what in Oklahoma? 3. I n France, they have a law forbidding the sale of dolls that do not have human faces. What popular doll cannot be sold? 4. O  n the island of Jersey, it’s against the law for a man to do what during the fishing season? 5. I n Tennessee, it is against the law to drive a car while doing what?


THIS IS A HAMMER By Samantha Mazzotta Does Your Septic Tank Need Pumping Out? QUESTION: How often do I need to have my septic tank pumped out? I keep getting calls and postcards from a local company saying I have to do it every year. — Jim S., via email ANSWER: How often your septic tank actually needs to be pumped out varies depending on the size of the tank, the number of people in your home, and local or state regulations regarding septic tank maintenance. First things first, however. How long has it been since your tank was last pumped out? If it’s been more than six years, or you honestly can’t remember, it’s probably time. If you know how long it’s been since the last cleaning, the size of the tank will help you figure out when next to have it pumped out. For example, if you have a 500gallon tank, and your home has four residents, the tank should be cleaned once per year. If there are only two residents in a home with a 500-gallon tank, a cleaning is only needed about every two and a half years. The purpose of pumping out the tank is to remove solid waste, or sludge, which builds up over time. Too much sludge reduces the efficiency of the septic system and can block or damage drain pipes, causing a backup into your house (ugh!) or damage to the drain field through which liquid waste is safely disbursed. Even with a cleaning schedule in place, once a year you should have a technician come out and check the sludge level of the tank. If the sludge level is too high — past the halfway mark — a cleaning is needed, along with an evaluation of the system to make sure everything is working correctly. Finally, a check of local and state regulations concerning septic tanks can save you some grief in the long run. Some municipalities mandate more frequent tank cleaning due to groundwater quality issues, and at least one county in Florida is requiring residents to completely replace tanks that are more than 40 years old. HOME TIP: Avoid flushing chemical products into a septic system. These will kill bacteria that are essential to breaking down waste. Send your questions or comments to, or write This Is a Hammer, c/o King Features Weekly Service, P.O. Box 536475, Orlando, FL 32853-6475. When in doubt as to whether you can safely or effectively complete a project, consult a professional contractor.

© 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.



TOYOTA ENGINES. 22RE, WANTED: 2 Used Single 3VZE, 5VZE, 3RZ, 2RZ. New Person Kayaks reasonably 22RE heads. Parting out priced. Call 843-338-5084. Toyota 4RUNNERS and trucks. www.toyotatruck EA Sports PGA Tour Golf 1-877-484-7888. Challenge — Includes 12 FINANCIAL courses. Home edition, commercial-ready Video Ever Consider a Reverse Game, $4,000 or best Mortgage? At least 62 years offer. FREE local delivery. old? Stay in your home & Increase cash flow! Safe & Call 843-338-5084. Effective! Call Now for your Your FREE DVD! Call Now 888G E T Classified Ad 459-2218. NOTICED

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Health Demonstrators needed. Showing people their antioxidant levels non-invasively... Technology featured on ATTENTION Diabetics with Dr. Oz May 17th. Now Medicare. Join America`s interviewing. Call Francine Diabetic Savings Club and 843-415-5667. receive a FREE diabetic bracelet. Membership is FURNITURE FREE. Qualify for meter QUEEN SIZE SLEEPER upgrades, prescription SOFA and two twin beds. delivery and free giveaways. Call for pricing. 843-784Call 1-866-989-6471. 2552 after 5 p.m. AMAZING WEIGHT Loss! “How You Can Lose 10 Pounds in 7 days flat” visit

EMPLOYMENT WANTED motivated, committed, experienced sales reps for growing local publication. Set your own hours as an independent contractor. Print advertising experience preferred but not necessary. High commissions paid. Three territories available — Beaufort, Hilton Head and Bluffton. Call Kathy at 843-368-2997.

GOT CLUTTER? DE-CLUTTER HERE! IT’S EASY, FUN & AFFORDABLE! Mail your classifieds to Tidbits of HHBB, P.O. Box 4858, Hilton Head Island, SC 29938 $5.00 for 25 words, 25 cents each additional word. Get noticed: Border — add $1, bold type — add $1, reverse type — add $2. Make checks or money orders payable to Tidbits of HHBB. $35 fee will be charged for NSF. While Tidbits of Hilton Head, Bluffton and Beaufort attempts to screen advertisers, we advise readers to use good judgement in responding to ad claims. Beware of “too good to be true” claims. Contact the appropriate consumer agency before sending payment. If a “company” offers you a loan for an advance fee, never, never send a payment, give credit card, bank account or personal information. For information on such loans, write FTS: Washington, DC 20580. Phone numbers beginning with the “900” prefix are toll calls and you will be charged for calling such numbers.

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Tidbits® of Hilton Head, Bluffton, and Beaufort 

Train Set

A Between 2006 and 2009, Philadelphia’s Chase Utley tallied at least 100 runs scored each season. What was his highest total? B Name the last major league pitcher to reach the All-Star break with at least 16 wins. C Who are the four NFL players who have won more than one Super Bowl MVP award? D How many times has the Dayton men’s basketball team won the NIT postseason tournament? E Starting with the 1992-93 season, how many times have the Detroit Red Wings hit the 100-point mark in the regular-season standings, and how many times did they do it before then? F In 2010, John Force became the oldest season champion in NHRA racing history. How old was he? G When was the last time before Wimbledon in 2011 that the top two men’s seeds met in a grand slam final? © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.

Q: I have an American Flyer train set manufactured during the 1945-1969 period. I bought this set new and only used it a few times. I would like to find a collector so I can sell it. — John, Springfield, Pa. A: There are several excellent price guides that document the values of prewar and postwar Lionel, American Flyer, Buddy “L,” Marx, Ives, Kusan and AMT model trains. One of the better references is “O’Brien’s Collecting Toy Trains: Identification and Price Guide” edited by David Doyle and published by Krause. This book features more than 1,200 photos in full color and more than 6,000 listings and up-to-date prices. This should help you determine the values of your train set. The American Flyer Collectors Club also might be helpful. The address is P.O. Box 13269, Pittsburgh, PA 15243. * * * Q: I have a broadsheet of “Abraham Lincoln’s Saloon License,” which has been in my family for a number of years. I am enclosing a picture of it and wonder what it might be worth. — Linda, Flagler Beach, Fla. A: Your poster was a premium, published and distributed

August 13–19, 2011 by the Minnesota Beer Wholesalers Association, probably during the 1930s or ‘40s. Although it is interesting, it is, of course, a reprint and not an original, but nevertheless a beer collectible. I suggest you contact Ritchie Dubreuil at the Florida chapter of the Beer Collectors Club of America, 5550 Vanderipe Road, Sarasota, FL 34241. * * * Q: My husband was a cartoonist assistant for many years. I have some original Sunday pages and quite a collection of comic art, and need some advice. For example, I have a “Flash Gordon” original Sunday page by Mac Raboy and an original Sunday page of “Mark Trail” by Ed Dodd. Can you help me find the right outlet for these items? — Ann, Orlando, Fla. A: You might begin by contacting the National Cartoonist Society, Columbus Circle Station, P.O. Box 20267, New York, NY 10023. * * * Q: I have a paperback booklet titled “Republican Text Book for the Campaign of 1902,” published by authority of the Republican Congressional Committee, Dunlap Printing Company, Philadelphia. Is it worth anything? — Dolores, Platteville, Wisc. A: Your booklet is worth about $25. * * * Write to Larry Cox in care of King Features Weekly Service, P.O. Box 536475, Orlando, FL 32853-6475, or send e-mail to Due to the large volume of mail he receives, Mr. Cox is unable to personally answer all reader questions. Do not send any materials requiring return mail. © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.

Answers on Page 3

August 13–19, 2011 

For Advertising Call: 843-368-2997 

Page 11

BIBLE TRIVIA by Wilson Casey

Challenging The Way We Think and Live in the Coming Week

Denying Myself in a Me-First Generation By Pastor Len Stubbs

Then He said to them all, “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and daily follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it. — Luke 9:23, 24 NIV This weeks Bible Bits is dealing with the Jesus requires. The only reason anyone most difficult command that Jesus gave ever picked up a cross and carried it in to us. For most of us, denying self at the Jesus’ time on earth was to die on it. It was level that Jesus was talking about and not a symbol we simply wear to church. demonstrating seems impossible for us Christian history is not over. We are to ever consider. I cannot remember ever witnessing it so rapidly as to cause us talking with a person who looks forward dizziness. If the end is near and the days of to denying themselves to the fullest extent openly living as a Believer ends, are you — Christian or not. ready to stand firm, deny yourself for His To deny yourself is what Jesus did in the sake even to death? Go back and reread garden of Gethsemane…”Father if you the verse for today — “to save your life are willing, take this cup from me; yet not (here on earth for a while) is to lose your my will, but your will be done.” life for eternity.” I am not willing to risk Denying yourself at this level is what that. Paul did when he appealed his case to “What good is it for a man to gain the Rome and his eventual death there in Acts whole world, and yet lose or forfeit his 25:11. very self?” Luke 9:25 Also read Isaiah It is what all of the martyrs did as they 14:24-27 chose to die rather than deny Jesus as Lord. Just maybe we should allow the real life Christian history is full of stories of Believers example of Jesus to challenge the way we who gave their lives as this command of think and live in the coming week.

1. Is the Book of Damascus in the Old or New Testament or neither? 2. From 2 Samuel 14, who was the best-looking man in Israel during King David’s reign? Joel, Samuel, David, Absalom 3. To whom did Naaman the Syrian ask forgiveness after worshipping the god Rimmon? Saul, Christ, Elisha, Darius 4. From John 3, who was a Pharisee and ruler among the Jews? Zacchaeus, Nicodemus, Judas, Peter 5. Who was known as the “Supplanter”? Aaron, Moses, Jacob, Hosea 6. What was the name of David’s first wife? Rachel, Priscilla, Michal, Ruth Wilson Casey’s trivia book “Know It? ... or Not?” is available from © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.

Thought of the Week

By Samantha Weaver z It was American ventriloquist and comedian Willie Tyler who made the following sage observation: “The reason lightning doesn’t strike twice in the same place is that the same place isn’t there the second time.” z Even flight attendants have their own patron saint, as declared by Pope Paul XXIII in 1962: Saint Bona of Pisa. z Many people believe that the Gutenberg Bible, which came from the presses of Johannes Gutenberg in the 1450s, is the first example of a printed book, but that’s not true; it’s the first book printed using movable type. The oldest known printed book is actually the “Diamond Sutra,” which was printed in China more than 550 years before the Gutenberg Bible. z In many Middle Eastern cultures, it is traditional to celebrate a wedding with five events. The first is the engagement party, during which the bride-to-be

u To clean out the drawers of my husband’s tool cabinet without disturbing the tools, I tucked a kneehigh panty hose leg over my vacuum cleaner wand. Most things stayed put, but the one or two small pieces of hardware that got sucked up were easily retrieved. I did this on his workbench too. I picked up all the dust and shavings along with the stray pieces of hardware. I pulled the hardware out of the hose leg, and they were in a tidy pile for him to put away. — U.L. in Kansas u Ripen a green tomato by wrapping it in a sheet of newspaper or placing it in a small, plain paper bag. Leave it on the counter, and check it daily until ripe. u To keep ice cream from dripping out of the bottom

“The nice thing about egotists is that they don’t talk about other people.” — Lucille S. Harper changes clothes several times. When the bride and groom sign the marriage contract there is another party, again with numerous changes of clothing by the bride. The day before the wedding there is a henna party, during which the bride and others are painted with elaborate designs that are thought to ward off evil spirits. The reception takes place after the wedding, and guests are often given five almond pieces, each piece symbolizing one of the sacred wedding wishes: health, happiness, wealth, longevity and fertility. Seven days after the wedding is the final celebratory event, known as sabaa, which is for women only and is analogous to the wedding shower we have in the West. z The town of North Pole, Alaska, is actually 1,700 miles south of the planet’s geographical North Pole.

* * *

© 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.

of a cone, just place a small marshmallow or a piece of marshmallow in the bottom of the cone before you fill it. u Our family loves to make our own pizza, and we purchase dough from a pizzeria. On pizza nights, I pick up the dough first thing on the way home from work. I get it close to where I work and let it sit in a bowl in the car while I pick up the kids and drive home. It takes about 45 minutes, so it’s risen nicely while we’ve been on the go. — E.F. in New York u If you’ve just purchased an expensive electronic item, take the packaging to a recycling center rather than advertise your purchase by putting the box at the curb. If you aren’t able to take it somewhere, cut the box into uniform pieces and bind them together, nonprinted side facing out. * * * Send your tips to Now Here’s a Tip, c/o King Features Weekly Service, P.O. Box 536475, Orlando, FL 32853-6475 or e-mail JoAnn at © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.

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Switch in minutes! 1-877-869-1209 ^BILL CREDIT/PROGRAMMING OFFER: IF BY THE END OF PROMOTIONAL PRICE PERIOD(S) CUSTOMER DOES NOT CONTACT DIRECTV TO CHANGE SERVICE THEN ALL SERVICES WILL AUTOMATICALLY CONTINUE AT THE THEN-PREVAILING RATES. LIMIT ONE PROGRAMMING OFFER PER ACCOUNT. Featured package names and prices: CHOICE $60.99/mo.; CHOICE XTRA $65.99/mo. CHOICE ULTIMATE $70.99/mo. Prices include a $26 bill credit for 12 months after rebate, plus an additional $5 with online rebate and consent to email alerts. Eligibility based on ZIP code. Upon DIRECTV System activation, customer will receive rebate redemption instructions (included in customer’s first DIRECTV bill, a separate mailing, or, in the state of New York, from retailer) and must comply with the terms of the instructions. In order to receive $31 monthly credits, customer must submit rebate online (valid email address required) and consent to email alerts prior to rebate redemption. Rebate begins up to 8 weeks after receipt of rebate submission online or by phone. Duration of promotional price varies based on redemption date. **2-YR. LEASE AGREEMENT: EARLY CANCELLATION WILL RESULT IN A FEE OF $20/MONTH FOR EACH REMAINING MONTH. Must maintain 24 consecutive months of your DIRECTV programming package. DVR service $7/mo. required for DVR and HD DVR lease. HD Access fee $10/mo. required for HD Receiver and HD DVR. No lease fee for only 1 receiver. Lease fee for first 2 receivers $6/mo.; additional receiver leases $6/mo. each. NON-ACTIVATION CHARGE OF $150 PER RECEIVER MAY APPLY. ALL EQUIPMENT IS LEASED AND MUST BE RETURNED TO DIRECTV UPON CANCELLATION, OR UNRETURNED EQUIPMENT FEES APPLY. VISIT OR CALL 1-800-DIRECTV FOR DETAILS. Advanced receiver instant rebate requires activation of the CHOICE XTRA Package or above; Mà S ULTRA or above (for DVR Receiver, OPTIMO Mà S Package or above); Jadeworld; or any qualifying international service bundle, which shall include the PREFERRED CHOICE programming package (valued at $39.99/mo.). Second advanced receiver offer requires activation of an HD DVR as the first free receiver upgrade and subscription to Whole-Home DVR service ($3/mo.). Additional advanced receiver upgrades available for a charge. INSTALLATION: Standard professional installation in up to 4 rooms only. Custom installation extra. *Eligibility for local channels based on service address. Not all networks available in all markets. Pricing residential. Taxes not included. Receipt of DIRECTV programming subject to DIRECTV Customer Agreement; copy provided at and in order confirmation. Š2011 DIRECTV, Inc. DIRECTV and the Cyclone Design logo, CHOICE and CHOICE XTRA are trademarks of DIRECTV, Inc. All other trademarks and service marks are the property of their respective owners.

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One of the prerequisites of good defensive play is the ability to put yourself in declarer’s position and try to predict how he is likely to play the hand. East did just that in today’s deal and wound up defeating what appeared to be an ironclad contract. East won the first two diamond tricks but was not optimistic about his side’s prospects of taking two more tricks. Though he could count on eventually scoring the king of hearts, the king of spades appeared certain to fall prey to a finesse. East concluded that his only chance lay in trying to talk declarer out of the winning line of play. Accordingly, at trick three he shifted to the eight of hearts! This extraordinary play had the desired effect on declarer. The heart return had all the earmarks of a singleton. This made the spade finesse a risky proposition, since West might win with the king and give East a heart ruff. By the same token, with the king of hearts “marked� in West’s hand (and thus subject to a subsequent finesse), there was no reason to risk the spade finesse. So after winning the heart return with the queen, declarer played the ace and another spade. East won and returned a club to dummy’s queen. South then crossed to his hand with a trump to take the heart finesse and was flabbergasted when East produced the king to set the contract. Of course, had East adopted a more normal line of defense, declarer undoubtedly would have tried both the spade and heart finesses and finished with 10 tricks. Perhaps South should have smelled a rat anyway. The method of play he chose was designed to guard against West’s holding both the king of hearts and king of spades, which was highly unlikely on the bidding. But the fact remains that if East had not planted the fear of a heart ruff in declarer’s mind, South could not have gone astray. Š 2011 King Features Syndicate, Inc.

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TB of HHBB Vol. 3 Issue 33-2  

TB of HHBB Vol. 3 Issue 33-2