Why do men laugh at that. P4 We salute single moms. P9
Aspire Sex & Love: P4 Why do men laugh at that? Lies Men Tell Before Sex.
Aspire Mom & Kids: P9 We salute single moms. Dating as a young mother.
Aspire Beauty & Fashion: P14 Products to put more pep in your prep. Beauty Tips from the Pros.
Aspire Mind & Body: P16 Having a healthy vagina. Brush Yet Have Bad Breath.
Page 4 | Sex & Love | Aspire Magazine
Men crack up at the grossest, stupidest, most immature stuff. Aaron Traister, a proud connoisseur of slapstick and other manly yuk yuks, explains. Physical comedy: From the Three Stooges to Jackass, watching people intentionally injure themselves or their friends and relations is high comedy. If balls are involved, it's even more amusing. A woman I know can't understand why her husband's male friends crack up every time her 4-year-old son punches his father in the crotch and yells, "I got him!" That simple act is the reason America's Funniest Home Videos has been on TV since 1862. Now, personally, I would be very angry if my son kept punching me in the nuts. But as long as it's not my son or my nuts, I'm perfectly willing to have good laugh at the other guy's expense, because I've been there, and I'm just delighted that it's not me writhing around on the ground pleading with a higher power to make the aching stop.
Page 5 | Sex & Love | Aspire Magazine Sexual humor: Guys are really insecure about sex, so we compensate by joking about it. Whether it's stories of ED, mid-coital flatulence, or terrible timing, men find comfort in making fun of themselves. The website Deadspin has a popular feature called "Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure," where mostly male readers vent their most embarrassing sexual misfires.
t's cathartic and seems to take the humiliation down a notch. I often wonder: If I had told the world about the time I accidentally took a prescription-strength laxative because I thought it was Viagra, would that have made the experience less emotionally scarring? Gallows humor: I don't know if you've ever hung out with EMTs, cops, doctors, or soldiers, but the jokes can get pretty dark pretty quickly, and maybe that's not such a bad thing. Humor is a defense mechanism that allows those people to do those hard, dangerous jobs. Death, trauma, illness--they touch us all eventually. Some guys just can't begin the healing process (or, in some cases, even comprehend what's happened) until they can laugh about whatever tragedy has taken place. If you can make a joke about something bad, then you can survive that something. Bathroom humor: We've tried for centuries to explain why this category is so funny (because going to the bathroom is gross and shocking, and everyone does it and nobody talks about it), but it doesn't work--you ladies aren't coming along for the ride. There is a great scene in Shakespeare's Two Gentlemen of Verona where Launce's dog pees on a woman's skirt and he claims responsibility so the dog won't be punished. It's very funny. (My parents were English teachers.) My point is, if Shakespeare couldn't convince you to laugh at potty humor, what chance do I have?
Page 6 | Sex & Love | Aspire Magazine
Thinking about trying something new this month with your partner? Why not try out some of Mr. Russel Joseph’s postions of the month. Follow them as I say and enjoy a new level of love making… 1. By holding yourself against that hard surface rather than moving with him, you create even more friction… I think this is a lot of fun and helps create a better connection….
You get double the orgasmic pleasure, His penis's circular motions tantalize your vagina while his public bone lightly rubs against your clitoris.
This man-on-top position makes you feel deliciously open and vulnerable, driving you to superorgasmic heights
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Page 8 | Sex & Love | Aspire Magazine
You already know men will do anything to get a woman into bed especially when she's as awesome as you are. And they're rarely slick. That's why we asked you to tweet us the biggest doozies you've heard from dudes in search of a little nooky. Get ready to LOL at these weak lines. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8.
Come over, I just want to snuggle. You should take your clothes off. We won't even have sex. I just love the feeling of your skin against mine "'I hardly ever have sex on a first date.'â€œ You're beautiful and it would be an honor to get to sleep with you. 'I wont tell if you won't. I just want to take a nice bubble bath with you - nothing else! Want to come meet my dog?' At 3 a.m. LMAO Just let me put the tip in!
Page 9 | Mom & Kids | Aspire Magazine
On May 13, we hope every mother out there gets breakfast in bed. And if you're a single mom who does it alone, know that we're taking this moment to raise our mimosa glasses to you. Partnered parents have a copilot, a significant other, to help when times get tough. However some don't. Instead, Some have a community of other mothers on this journey, and four years into the trip, they become convinced this village of moms has made my family whole. We live in a womens world because of the lack of real men and for this we salute the single mothers of trinidad and tobago. Crime is on the high because most homes are without a father to man the house and the mother has to play both roles. This becomes hard but only the strong ones make it through, from getting money to support the family, to making stuff to eat at school, to making sure our kids of tomorrow stay on the right track. Our mothers have a every hard job in growing tomorrows leaders and we should all play our part in thisâ€Ś.
Page 11 | Mom & Kids | Aspire Magazine
If you're a single mom who's dating, you will have stories to tell. About trying to explain to a young, single guy what a stretch mark is and how you earned yours. Or asking Grandma to spend the night and babysit so you can, you know, have a morning after. I've heard about everything from leaking breast milk during a first date to getting caught in the act by an 11year-old. I started dating again two years after my son was born (my child's father left me when I was 14 weeks along). I agreed to a blind setup and had to have a pre-date martini just to dull my nerves. Later that night, when I pulled out my wallet to pay for a round of our drinks, one of my son's pacifiers went flying into the guy's chest. It was hilarious, and he laughed it off, thank God. Getting back out there again has made me realize that while my son's father hurt me to my core, there are quality men who are interested in single moms and not at all under the impression that we're looking for help or a ring. And honestly, isn't all dating pretty awkwardâ€Ś
Page 12 | Mom & Kids | Aspire Magazine
If pregnant, and considering scheduling a C-section. It seems so much more convenient. What do you think? Here are just a few reasons women have given me for wanting to schedule a C-section, rather than let nature take its course: "We need to work around my husband's business trip," "I don't want my vagina to stretch," and my favorite, "I'd like my baby to be a Libra." Women think that surgery will be easy and that the only sign they delivered a baby will be a tiny scar even the smallest bikini can hide. Since 1996, the cesarean rate has soared a whopping 56 percent. Doctors order them when they're needed, but 2.5 percent happen at the mom's request. What many women don't realize is that a C-section is a major surgery, and with that comes the risk of infections, anaesthesia complications, blood clots, and worse. There may also be problems with future pregnancies. These risks are small, but why take them? I can tell you as a mom of four that motherhood will be filled with lots of naturally occurring inconveniences--not only the due date. But it's well worth it.
Page 14 | Beauty & Fashion | Aspire Magazine
Didn't go on a tropical spring break? Fake it with this highlighter: It flatters everyone and gives great glow…
Speedy spot removal:
Blemish treatments can leave behind a crusty patch or dark spot--but this one has niacinamide, which helps protect skin from drying out and scarring. •
Jennifer Hudson's hairstylist Tippi Shorter designed this leave-in conditioner for women with coarse texture. It knocks out frizz, adds luster, and leaves unruly strands super-soft.
Page 15 | Beauty & Fashion | Aspire Magazine
â€˘ Achieve Facial Harmony: Celebrity make-up artist Troy Surratt says a monochromatic look is classically feminine. So mix a bit of your lipstick (whether red, poppy pink, or coral) with moisturizer to make a cream blush and dab it on the apples of your cheeks.
â€˘ Go Highbrow: Fuller eyebrows have surpassed their overly plucked, thin counterpart as today's arch of choice. But all of those untweezed hairs can get a little unruly. Surratt suggests brushing them up using a toothbrush spritzed with hairspray to put them in their place.
Page 16 | Mind & Body | Aspire Magazine
Im fed up with people who peddle useless and even harmful products to spiff up our "imperfect" vaginas. Here, she answers your most embarrassing health questions with expert medical advice. I grew up in a time and place â€” 1960s, the South â€” where ladies did not talk about their vaginas. Not with their mothers, their sisters, or their best girlfriends. Not with their doctors. Not with anyone, really. We didn't look or touch. We knew those parts were down there somewhere and assumed they were okay. That was not a good thing. We didn't have the basic information we needed to keep ourselves healthy, let alone the kind of knowledge that would help us have a happy sex life. Things started changing for the better in the '70s, when the seminal health book Our Bodies, Ourselves was published, with its diagrams and feminist outlook. But the biggest shift came with The Vagina Monologues in the late '90s. That one-woman show was a sensation: Women of all ages, all across the world, rose up to acknowledge and proclaim their love for their lady parts. We could actually say the word vagina. In fact, saying it was encouraged, and became the chic thing to do! Fast-forward to 2012, and the conversation is still going strong. But I confess, I'm alarmed by the new direction that some of these talks are going. Women are being told by marketers, manufacturers, and even some medical professionals that they really should try to have a "better" vagina. You've seen the ads, the news blurbs, the segments on medical talk shows in which doctors hawk odor-removing products or go on about how sad and weak vaginas supposedly get as women age. Twenty to 40 percent of women still douche (a bad idea, because it increases risk of infection), and sales of "freshening" wipes are skyrocketing.
Page 18 | Mind & Body | Aspire Magazine
Tried everything? A dentist, a doctor, and a nutritionist reveal the causes of bad breath, and the best remedies and treatments to make your mouth fresh. THE DENTIST SAYS: Most bad breath is caused by bacteria, so when you brush, which should be morning and night, and after lunch if possible, make sure to clean the roof of your mouth, the insides of your cheeks, and your tongue, because the skin can harbor bacteria. It can also linger between teeth, so follow with flossing. And be sure to drink water throughout the day â€” a dry mouth breeds a more aggressive type of bacteria.
If you can't brush after lunch, swish some water around your mouth or pop a piece of sugar-free mint gum to remove at least some of it from your teeth." Rinsing with an alcohol-free mouthwash also helps (mouthwashes with alcohol dry up saliva). Try Crest Pro-Health Clinical Rinse, $7.29. If none of these methods work, see your dentist. "The issue could be plaque buildup or a more serious condition like tooth decay. You can also ask for a prescription mouthwash. These contain antibacterial properties that kill existing bacteria and reduce future bacterial growth.
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Published on Jun 3, 2012