\ katrina hall checks
off her list of all that’s wrong with christmas
We know most of what we know about Christmas by watching American TV shows, Elf included. So, all the things we understand to represent the season – roaring fires, dragging fresh trees home in the snow, shopping at Macy’s, strange groups of people in hats and gloves singing Christmas carols – we’ve never, ever experienced. The only time a group of singers has stood outside our house and sung Christmas songs, they woke the kids and I had to tell the singers to shut up and go away. There was no Christmas joy spread anywhere on that occasion. And eggnog in 30-degree heat could quite possibly cause a salmonella outbreak. It is no longer acceptable to have Kentucky Fried Chicken and mashed potatoes for Christmas lunch. Christmas is all about the food these days. Right now I do not know what watercress is, and I am worried a whole salmon won’t fit in my oven, so already I’m feeling the pressure. And I have vegetarians coming! No matter how many presents the kids get, they will always ask if there is more. Maybe Santa left one outside on his way in, or maybe there’s another one somewhere under the tree. Come Boxing Day, they’ll be asking when Easter is. The only queue-jumpers we should deal with, and as a matter of urgency, are those at the Myer windows. They are tricky, man. But for all these weird, strange and wrong things about Christmas, there are a hundred good things … like Champagne and bonbons and being woken at 5am by kids telling you to come quick, mum, Santa’s been. You’ve got to love it for the good and bad. \ email@example.com (ISTOCK / THINKSTOCK)
ou have to catch up with everybody you have ever known in your entire life before Christmas. This means you have to juggle social engagements and check your calendar before committing to anything, and that is just such a tosser thing to do. Houses with exterior decorations suddenly become cool. Strange, given that garden gnomes in football guernseys and terracotta mushrooms aren’t anywhere near acceptable in the garden ever, but blow-up Santas on sleds and dancing elves are. Then, after New Year, decorated houses are all of a sudden not cool. In fact, some people choose to leave their Christmas decorations up all year round. They are on to something, and it’s called apathy. Christmas trees are ghastly but everyone’s afraid to call it. The real ones leave prickly little things all over the place, and the plastic versions that come in boxes give off a very strange chemical smell. Still we insist on posting pics of our freshly decorated, jazzy, sparkly trees on Facebook and Pinterest so everyone can say how gorgeous your tree is. Oh, and tinsel is meant to represent falling snow, so why is it red and green and blue? Some people go to church only at Christmas. We don’t, we watch Elf. We’ve tried religion and all the Christmas movies, but Elf is the only one that works for us on both counts. Sometimes we watch it during the off-season, just to remind ourselves to be wary “christmas of fake Santas and not eat used chewing gum from the New York subway. trees My seven-year-old thinks “Jesus-Christare was-born-on-Christmas-Day” is a swear ghastly’’ word. Mention Jesus in the actual context and she freaks out and gets the swear jar. That’s another reason we don’t go to church.
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BAriSTA \ LEANNE TOLRA REVIEWS SPOUT CAFé Years ago Elliot bAristA Koren watched boss Jonathan Dvash create a caffe latte and
weather warms. Co-owner Jonathan Dvash finish it with some impressive latte art. That says Spout can seat another 30 inside and sparked his desire to become a barista. “I’ve gets rather cosy on weekends. worked in some pretty ordinary places and Dvash spent three years at The Pound used their equipment to learn,” he says. in Elsternwick and another two at Miss “Now, three years later Johno is my boss.” Jackson in St Kilda before he and Ferris Gattica in St Kilda marked the official “Zul” Khamsani, a chef who spent time at start of his journey to the head barista role St Ali, Gas Eatery in South Melbourne he took on at Spout six weeks ago. “I and Eden Espresso in Malvern, was there for 14 months and it’s joined to open their own café. where I learnt the A-Z of specialty the open Dvash grew up in East St Kilda coffee and most of what I know kitchen and recalls some of the local up until now,” he says. hums with shopkeepers from his youth. Stints at Hawk & Hunter activity The space had been a in Ripponlea, Little Collins hairdressing salon and a pizzeria in Clayton and Little Tommy and needed an overhaul. Friends and Tucker in Bentleigh added further builders helped the pair put their ideas know-how. Koren, who studied graphic together with style. The rustic stools use design at RMIT, completed an espresso timber recycled from fishing boats in Bali basics course at William Angliss Institute and the original brick walls add character. knowing he didn’t want to spend his The menu features shakshuka eggs days behind a desk. He enjoys the (baked in tomatoes and spices) and Turkish coffee-passionate crowd in Ripponlea, bread, and a smoked-chicken sanga with serving up nutty long blacks with a walnut and celery mayonnaise. luscious cocoa body and subtle strawberry Chef Sarah Spiteri (ex-Miss Jackson, sweetness, and hopes to compete in latte Donovans) has recently joined the team to art competitions. help Zul in the busy kitchen. The café uses Allpress Coffee’s Supremo Dvash had used Allpress coffee at blend and Koren is enjoying experimenting Miss Jackson and is pleased that the with iced long-blacks in the warm weather. Sydney-based company has now opened a He says there’s a cold-drip unit on order. \ firstname.lastname@example.org café and roastery in Collingwood.
SPOUT CAFé 48 Glen eirA rOAd, riPPOnleA Phone \ 9523 8155 Barista \ Elliot Koren Coffee \ Allpress Barista’s choice \ Strong caffe latte Open \ Monday to Friday 7am-5pm; weekends 8am-5pm
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Semi-industrial touches give this lively space a casual vibe. Ply panels line exposed-brick walls and recycled timber bar stools sit at the counter, facing the La Marzocco FB80 espresso machine. The kitchen hums with activity and the room purrs with the chatter of mums with prams and suntans. Huge amber glass bottles hold sprays of greenery and outdoor seating attracts sociable locals. \
no mess no fuss and no Hollywood stars just great coffee, roasted in Melbourne
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go on, take a shot at www.shotsbygenovese.com.au * Nespresso® is a trademark of Societe de Produits Nestle SA. Neither that company nor its affiliates have manufactured or endorsed this product or the use of this product. The Nespresso® trademark is used in relation to this product in a descriptive capacity only and not to indicate the origin of this product. DECEMBER 12, 2013 \ The weekly review 5
Decanter \ Ben Thomas is Turning japanese husks off, before milling them down further to get to the starch and remove proteins on the outer grain, which add impurities to the finished sake. It ends up being a rather expensive process. There’s a strict classification system regarding how far the grains are milled down – or polished – too. When 50 per cent or less is polished off, it’s called daiginjo; up to 60 per cent is ginjo and between 60-70 per cent is classed as honjozo. The more the grain is milled, the more expensive the sake is. After it’s polished, the rice is steamed and inoculated with koji, a mould that converts starch to sugar. Water and yeast is added and fermentation takes place in an open fermenter. As the process progresses, more steamed rice and yeast is added to trigger a parallel fermentation, in which the yeasts feed on the sugars as they are converted by the koji. The mixture is pressed, just like fermented grapes, then the extracted juice pasturised and left to settle in tanks for a few months before being bottled. Some sake is fortified with alcohol, others are broken down with water or left unadulterated. Sake is at its best up to a year after bottling and will last a week in the fridge after being opened. \ email@example.com » Leigh Hudson owns Chef’s Armoury at 422 Church Street, Richmond, and he is hosting a free sake tasting, matched with Christmas dishes, on December 14 from 1pm. If you can’t make it, visit www.sakeshop.chefsarmoury.com Online Only »
Ben Thomas’ weekly wine selections
(moodboard / THINKSToCK)
oes your family have a Christmas wine tradition? For us there’s always sparkling shiraz at the table and Rutherglen muscat poured with the pudding. This year, I’m going to change the pace a little and serve sake with one or two of the Christmas Day courses. Sake is a great option with food, complementing and highlighting elements rather than competing with them as some wines can. “When you drink sake you should eat. In Japan, you’ll order food and sake – every round of drinks has a little nibble with it,” says Melbourne-based sake importer and sommelier Leigh Hudson. Just like wine, different sake styles are suited to different dishes, from oysters and salmon to charcuterie and even steak – pretty much anything you might find on the Christmas table. Try karakuchi with oysters, oni koroshi with cured meats, and nama with prawns on Christmas Day. While there are different styles and a host of brewers with names that are hard to remember, let alone spell, sake’s actually a really approachable drink. “Sake is where beer and wine meet – in flavour and how they are made,” says Hudson. “I think beer drinkers can find something familiar with sake and wine drinkers will find something very familiar, too.” There are common characters that wine and beer lovers will appreciate, from the citrus and minerality of a riesling and stone fruits of chardonnay to the tropical aromas and caramel flavours of a beer. “Sake’s made from rice that’s specifically grown for sake; it tends to be a bigger grain with a starchy centre. There are many breeds and some are better than others: just like grapes, price is a good indicator for quality.” Sake producers mill the rice grains down to take the
Ever wondered why sake is drunk from small porcelain cups, known as an ockoko? “Small glasses are based on social reasons but people do drink from larger vessels at home,” says Leigh Hudson. “If you’re drinking with colleagues, you pour for the other people and never fill your own – it’s very rude if you do. “The small glasses allow you to finish your drink quickly. at the
take a taste trip to the middle east South Yarra is abuzz with excitement and activity. It all seems to be heading in the direction of Toorak Road, where Zurouna, a new Middle Eastern restaurant has built up quite a reputation with its patrons. Zurouna owners Adam and Dahouk, bring an approach to cuisine that blends the simplicity and freshness of traditional Middle Eastern cooking with the vast flavours of the sea and the more rustic, traditional flavours of the mountains and deserts of the Middle East. Zurouna, meaning “come over” or “drop-in” aims to recapture the relaxed nature of Middle Eastern dining mixed with that little bit of flare that is South Yarra!
304 Toorak Road South Yarra 9827 1956 zurouna.com.au 6 The weekly review \ DECEMBER 12, 2013
end of the night everyone will have poured for each other.” Sake is not aromatic like wine, so serving it in a glass with a large bowl does not improve its enjoyment. a smaller vessel, known as a tokkuri, is used to pour sake at the table. Tokkuri come in portion sizes, starting with a measure for two people. Porcelain tokkuri help the sake to be warmed and sit in hot water to stay warm. \
Fashion \ THE LIFE AQUATIC: JANE ROCCA
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8 The weekly review \ DECEMBER 12, 2013
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hen it comes to swimwear this season, it’s all swimwear collection is all about pitching to the about bold, printed Lycra, fabulous one-piece sun lover all year round. Colourful swimwear suits for a hint of glam, and chic bikinis for and functional one-piece suits that flatter all body those who dare. Keeping your beachside manner chic shapes are what rule her summer message. and feminine depends on what you wear and how “I think the one-piece is a classic style that never you wear it. goes out of fashion,” says Manani. Designer label We Are Handsome is known for its “It’s the most flattering style and perhaps the progressive approach to swimwear and resort pieces. most versatile also doubling up as a super flattering This season, its collection, titled The Divine, is all about body suit. I’ve designed the new Sunseeker collection taking its bold prints one step further. with the resort lifestyle in mind, so our Boathouse It’s here you’ll find imagery of places, animals one-piece looks amazing poolside as well as bar and nature emblazoned across entire swimsuits side – worn with some of our signature print and beach dresses in an effort to remind lounge pants.” “I think the people that summer is about slowing down Zoe Elizabeth is another swimwear and one-piece is and taking stock and connecting with your lifestyle label pitching to the summer animal instinct, too. goddess. Started by Zoe Weir in 2006 a classic” “It’s easy to miss the beautiful things in life from her studio in Richmond, she is when we’re moving at 100 miles per hour,” says stocked across Australia and known for Jeremy Somers, managing and creative director of her individualist swimwear bent. We Are Handsome. This summer expect a colour scheme The Sydney label is all about bringing sexy back – inspired by sorbet hues and Liberty prints bikinis and one-piece swimsuits that can work with a – from tart yellow, lollipop pink and variety of body shapes. creamy peach that sit against cool blues The Landing panel print (which features a plane about and mint shades. to land) makes a comeback for summer. It was first When it comes to knowing what style to go for worn by the likes of Tyra Banks, while The Township this season, Weir says you need to try on a variety print was inspired by a holiday in Portofino a few years of looks to consider what works best. ago – a colour palette that matches the upmarket Italian “The trick is to try on as many bikini shapes as resort’s blue skies and creamy landscape. Other pieces possible,” Weir says. include images of lions, stallions and penguins for “You should approach buying a swimsuit like you kooky fun. would a dress – buy it because it makes you feel good. Kaitie Manani, who runs Vamastyle, says her Australian girls are very confident and natural when
InTervIew \ ANDREW McUTCHEN looks foR fUN iN CRiCkET WiTH NEARly DUAl HAT-TRiCk TAkER DAMiEN flEMiNg As His gUiDE
Tricky business T
he truth is, in sport near misses are often just as memorable as the real thing. In Damien Fleming’s case, one particular dropped catch might be even better, because it was just … so … torturously … close! Most people know Fleming took a hat-trick in his debut Test for Australia. And when you really think about it, that fact is extraordinary. A skinny 24-year-old from Perth claims three Pakistani scalps in consecutive balls the first time he wears the famous baggy green cap. The first wicket, a catch at mid-wicket, the second a spearing LBW, the third caught behind. But Fleming plays down the feat. “It’s not something you really aim for,” he says. “The big one for me was getting the baggy green on your head. And then we broke records in Test cricket and I probably played with seven or eight of the greatest players ever. That’s what you look back on.” As famous as that first hat-trick made Fleming, the almost second is invariably picked over more, especially given the profile of the culprit who bungled it. The question that Fleming has asked himself umpteen times since is, would he be dining out on the story as often if Shane Warne had actually snared the slips-bound rocket that ricocheted off his hands? Would it be better to have two genuine hat-tricks or one and two-thirds, involving perennial media magnet Warney? “The conclusion I’ve come to is that I don’t reckon people would’ve remembered it as much if Warney had actually taken it,” Fleming says. “Real cricket fans would know I took two Test hat-tricks, but by him dropping it and Warne being that famous, a lot more people know that, don’t they?”
Like most retired sportspeople, Fleming talks about his cricketing career openly and freely. Since then he’s become a father, I wonder how that experience compares to the highs of representing Australia? “You just can’t compare them,” he says. “The daily joys of fatherhood and hopefully grandfatherhood is going to be there for the rest of your life; whereas playing for Australia was a seven-year period.” We’re sitting in a café in Ashburton, with people milling all around us. There are no interruptions for autographs or “are you the guy who …?”. The past is clearly safe where it is, but the present is full of promise for Fleming. The conversation covers as much of Fleming’s current gig as a commentator as it does his time as one of Australia’s spearhead quicks. It was earlier this year that the surprise verdict was delivered by current and former players that he was the most popular cricket commentator in the country, edging out even ageless legend Richie Benaud. Fleming loves the work, and takes it seriously. “Even now I’m still looking to improve,” he says. “To take it different levels, to be more entertaining, to give a better insight. So I’ve got my commentary goals, as I had my cricketing goals.” Fleming could happily talk about the vagaries of commentary all day, but that won’t do. One thing I’m eager to tell Fleming now I have the chance is that I’m sorry, but just like the song goes, I don’t like cricket, oh no. And I don’t love it, either. I used to. I have more
“I don’t think it’s really the players’ fault that it’s less fun. It’s the standards within cricket australia”
The scorecard Pakistan v Australia at rawalpindi, 1994
Aamer Malik 65 c Bevan b Fleming
Inzamam-ul-Haq 0 lbw Fleming
Salim Malik c Healy b Fleming 237
On a rOll \ Damien Fleming (left) celebrates claiming the scalp of Pakistan batsman Inzamam-ul-Haq. pure jOy \ Fleming celebrates his hat-trick (far right) after dismissing Salim Malik. Fleming became only the third bowler to get a Test hat-trick on debut. (SHaun BoTTerIll / GeTTy IMaGeS)
12 The weekly review \ DECEMBER 12, 2013
Picture \ jules tahan fond cricket memories than I do of football. I have memories of blokes in coloured pyjamas running around under lights, playing well past my bedtime, with big blazing batsmen – Deano! – and gangly West Indian quicks going at each other. I have memories of some poor Kiwi bloke being called a wanker, whatever that was. Memories, too, of tension and drama and a whole stand mirroring the every move of a hefty bloke with a mo. I have bloody excellent memories of cricket. Now, it’s grim-faced whippets with reality-TV girlfriends also selling me undies and cricket bats and turning a triple-century knock into a seven-figure sponsorship. Where’s the fun in that? Damien Fleming’s room-mate on that first tour, in 1994-95, says the fun has gone the way of the facial hair. Former Test selector Mervyn Hughes was recently quoted as saying “facial hair brings the best out of the players”. “When I played, a lot of people had moustaches – David Boon and Graham Gooch [former England skipper] both had lovely moustaches,” Hughes said in The Telegraph. “They are just going out of the game. I firmly believe it should be brought back. I would like to see the guys with moustaches, beards, goatees, half-beards and half-shaved heads.” Despite being an admittedly “odd couple” in their hotel room – “I never said a word in my first few years and he was the loud extrovert” – Damien and Mervyn have found accord over the years. While the pair were “the messiest guys of all time” in the Australian team, they have forged a fraternal bond. Hughes is now “like an older brother”. “I’d trust him with my life. He’s the most honest, polite person I’ve played with.” This tender bromance notwithstanding, Fleming happens to agree with him on the point about a little extra growth going a long way. “I totally agree with Merv,” he says. “We’re a mullet short, we’re a goatee short, we’re a Boonie moustache short. And for me, I’d rather it come from the quicks. When you talk about the characters, how many characters are batsmen?”
read » Damien Fleming’s
book Bowlology: Cricket, Life and Stories From the Avenue of Apprehension is available from good bookshops.
The Mo: Merv Hughes in Bay 13. (PENNY STEPHENS \ THE agE)
Fleming is obviously biased towards his kind, the bowlers, but overall he’s philosophical about the state of cricket. To put it bluntly, they had more fun back in his day, but they make more money now: “I suppose nothing’s perfect. They make millions of dollars now, whereas my era was quite well off, the era before got nothing.” Is it as simple as declaring the current-era professional compared to a semi-professional and before that amateur sport? “It was probably semi-professional in my time in terms of money. I don’t think we were any less professional in our training. We still had to sacrifice a lot. You had to drift away from from your mates a bit because you were playing cricket. But at least there was a culture where it was OK to celebrate. “I remember we won an Adelaide Test at 11 o’clock one time and we knew we’d be able to drink for the rest of the afternoon in the dressing rooms, then go out and celebrate in public, as well. We’d pick a pub, we’d celebrate with the punters. So the punters loved it. We were out there doing our thing. And then you travel and you train hard. “With fines and all that now, that’d be just asking for trouble. I don’t think it’s really the players’ fault that it’s less fun. It’s the standards within cricket Australia and the standards within the public. It would be all through the papers now, wouldn’t it, because everyone’s got a phone. “I can tell you the younger players coming through still love it. If you talk to older players who have started playing in premier leagues around the world, they’re out there in the field going ‘Who are my teammates? What am I doing this for?’ It’s just money. “Whereas, if you ask a lot of young players, they still want to do it. You’re still playing for your country, and I think that Test cricket has still got that feeling to it. It still means something to play for Australia.” \ firstname.lastname@example.org We Welcome your feedback @
www.theweeklyreview.com.au/interview DECEMBER 12, 2013 \ The weekly review 13
this gender-bending explosion, the experienced musical theatre star transforms himself into the Queen of pop. strike a pose, get into the groove and express yourself as Madonna opens her heart! there’s no missing a beat in this one-man cabaret; In Vogue features 35 song references and 12 songs sung in their entirety. ■ January 15-26; Sweet Dreams, 7pm, and In Vogue 9pm. At fortyfivedownstairs,
45 Flinders lane, Melbourne. tickets: 9662 9966 www.fortyfivedownstairs.com MusiC Beer Gypsies new year’s eve plans are quite often hit or miss. if you’re struggling to find that perfect event to bring in 2014, look no further; Beer Gypsies are having a nye concert-come-mini festival in Collingwood on december
Come home to
tHeatre BiG Bad Wolf Big Bad Wolf is a charming story by Matthew Whittet about one of the most misunderstood characters in fairytale history. this playful production for ages five and older is presented by award-winning children’s theatre company Windmill theatre. directed by rosemary Myers, who has also directed Boom Bah!, The Wizard of Oz, Fugitive, Girl Who Cried Wolf and more, the production follows the story of the infamous Big Bad Wolf. His incredibly sharp teeth, yellow eyes
and his own ideas about personal hygiene don’t win him many friends – but one girl is brave enough to ignore all that, and an unlikely friendship is born. ■ season runs January 10-25 southbank theatre, the lawler, 140 southbank Boulevard, southbank. tickets available at www.mtc.com.au Food MelBourne food Tour Melbourne is a dynamic city when it comes to food and a great way to explore its passionate foodie scene is with the best in the business. this food-filled walking tour leads guests to the latest and greatest of Melbourne’s restaurants, food stores and culinary icons. explore lanes, alleys and grand boulevards to find the latest tasty treats, such as gelati, samosas, Chinese egg tarts at Maxim’s plus roast duck from City BBQ, decadent truffles from Ganache Chocolate and treats from the iconic phillippa’s Bakery. the tour will also include a visit through the restaurant-filled Flinders lane
31. Bust a move on the dance floor as owl eyes, City Calm down, set sail and tully on tully keep the tunes rolling. your ticket ($98) includes drinks and entertainment on the night – there’s even tarot card readers to spice up things a bit. Friends at Mildura Brewery, napoleone Cider, and six Foot six are getting in on the act. tickets are on sale now and numbers are limited, so get in early. ■ december 31, 6.30pm-7am second story studios, 159 sackville street, Collingwood www.beergypsies.com.au
and ends at the award-winning Cumulus inc for a glass of wine and tastings from the kitchen. if you miss out on tickets, Melbourne Food experiences has two more scheduled tours in 2014; February 15 and March 15. ■ January 25, 11.30am-3.30pm tour meeting spot; corner of spring and little Collins streets, Melbourne tickets $125. For bookings call 1800 801 838 www.melbournefoodexperiences. com.au \ CoMpiled By BianCa Villarosa
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DECEMBER 12, 2013 \ The weekly review 15
A Review Local Advertising Feature
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400 Victoria Street, North Melbourne (03) 9329 8622 www.somethingaussie.com.au
Sun-Thu 10am-10pm Fri-Sat 9am-12pm
Exclusive Offer ABORIGINAL ART & CRAFTS SOUVENIRS BOOKS AUSSIE TREATS HEALTH & BEAUTY JEWELLERY GIFT IDEAS G6527353AA-dc12Dec
Discount On All Drive Packages
DO NOT LITTER
Bookings Essential Ph: 03 9646 6015 www.auscarts.com.au
DECEMBER12, 11,2013 2013\\The THE weekly WEEKLY REVIEW DECEMBER review1717
REVIEW CLASSIFIEDS 1300 138 910 Adult Services
PRINCESS RANI - Escort. All affectionate service. You will be ver y pleased. Please call 9935 7672. swa4281be.
Beautiful Girls From 18+ Private Car park Available Full Service Start From $70
142-144 Frankston-Dandenong Rd, Dandenong 3175
Club 741 Best in Melbourne OPEN 24/7
9310 1070 / 0403 046 998
It’s Fun Time..... With.... Many languages spoken by our ladies.
24 Buchanan Rd, Brooklyn
Relaxation Massage 7 days, 10am to 8pm. 204 Barkley Street, Footscray. Phone 9689 0360.
AWESOME THAI MASSAGE Traditional Thai, relaxation with oil, foot massage and deep tissue. Qualified Thai females. Open 7 days. 10am-10pm 221 Clarendon Street South Melbourne
Beautiful NEW Hot Ladies.... Plus your usual favorites.
0432 774 645
741 Geelong Road, Brooklyn www.club741.com.au
Over 30 Years Experience Specialising In: • Floor & Wall Tiles • Old & New Homes • Kitchen & Bathroom Renovation Free Measure & Quote.
f of ng 0 oki $2 bo r 1h
• Cheap boxes for sale • Packing pianos • Antiques • Ballard Tables Local, Country, Interstate No job too small Unwanted goods or rubbish taken to tip All areas from $89 per hour, minimum 2 hours
Massage Therapy CARLTON Chinese Massage. Natural Therapy. 63 Pelham St, Carlton. Open 7 days. 10am-9pm. Phone 9939 8867.
Hot Oil Lomi Massage
Adult Services IMOGEN - Hot, hot, hot. Ex pole dancer. 32yo size 8. Tall, toned, busty and blonde. I visit you. 9495 2723 swa4281be
GENTLE MAGGIE - escort. Available daytimes, 40 + slim and affectionate, GFE, pash kissing. Phone 9495 2760. swa4281be.
LOTUS EXOTIC ESCORT I Luv you longtime. Tiny size 8 figure, pleasurable. I can do body rubs too. 9935 7738 swa4281be.
Remedial & hot bamboo. Male/ female practioners. Sth Melb/ Docklands. 0431 665 312. G6458364AA-dc21Nov
ADORABLE ANGELA Stunning, upmarket doll. Size 10, " DD " bust. A discreet outcall service. Phone 9416 6204. swa4281be.
S W A 1 1 3 E
EUROPEAN MASSAGE In convenient central city location. Please phone Julia: 0417 506 582. melbournecitymassage.com
Close to CBD
ALL VIC TAXI TRUCKS G6139967AA-dc25Jul REMOVALS AND STORAGE
Health and Wellbeing
9650 1516 HONEST RATES G6313861AA-dc25Sep HONEST TIME QUOTES
THE weekly WEEKLY REVIEW \ DECEMBER 11,12, 2013 18 The review \ DECEMBER 2013
Massage Therapy ORIENTAL MASSAGE
High quality service and low price. 47 Dickson Street, Sunshine. Call 9311 9994. 259 Ballarat Road, Footscray. Call 8307 0114.
Deluxe Thai Massage • Traditional Thai • Deep tissue • Foot • Relaxation • Remedial Qualiﬁed Thai Females 7 days, 10am - 10pm
Cars New and Used PLEASE NOTE: Private party sales are open to negotiation, therefore statutory charges may vary and are not included in quoted prices.
CLASSIFIEDS Contact us on
1300 138 910
Thai Massage & Spa Combination Thai Massage Hydrotherapy Spa Waxing & Beauty Male & Female Welcome 7 Days, 10am 10pm 37 Flemington Rd, North Melbourne
Mention this Ad.
Royal Garden Queen International Massage Luxurious Studios With Shower Facilities Male/Female Waxing
MIDDLE PARK Massage. 7 days. From $40. Qualified, experienced, caring and thorough. Full body massage. Matt: 0412 045 585.
140 Queen Street Melbourne CBD
$49. 10am-11pm. Basement, CBD. 9654 6635.
13 Chapel Street, Windsor
Also at 29 Johnson St, Reservoir
Sauna & Spa available
Only 5 mins from CBD
1300 138 910
Relaxation. 305 Queensberry St, North Melbourne. 7 days. Telephone: 9077 7620.
Contact us on
03 9347 6000
(2hr meter parking out front) Girls always available
1300 138 910
Metro Media Publishing will not knowingly accept for publication any advertisement which may be in breach of the Competition and Consumer Act or any other relevant law.
554-556 Swanston St, Melbourne Open 24 hrs - 7 days
Readers are entitled to expect that the advertised prices are the actual prices at which they can purchase the particular goods and services.
10 Fulton St, Oakleigh South Open From 10am - Late Escort Available
Prices should not be quoted as being 'excluding GST' or 'plus GST' or by the use of words or phrases conveying similar meaning.
Ask for Our Tuesday Special
Make 6 figure income working from home. Personal development industry. Full training and live support. Simple system. Professional approach essential. www.readytoflourish.com.au
To advertise or place your wedding photo in this section contact one of our friendly staff on
The Competition and Consumer Act provides that advertised prices for goods and services which attract GST should be GST inclusive.
THE ROSE NEW GIRLS EVERY WEEK
9548 3000 or 0418 881 551
IMPORTANT NOTICE TO ALL ADVERTISERS
45-47 Tope Street, South Melbourne SWA5109BE
7 Duke Street Abbotsford 9428 8668 swa6679b.
Homes, Businesses, Offices, Insurance Work
The Duchess $50
50% DISCOUNT* or cover $100 excess Windows... Doors... Shop Fronts...
8.30am-5.00pm, Monday - Friday. All major credit cards accepted.
✯ Stephanie ✯
Monday 1.00pm Monday 3.00pm
Phone 1300 138 910
Stunning mature lady. Petite size 8. Night times only. 0449 956 626 swa3761xe.
Glazing and Glaziers AUSSIE EMERGENCY GLASS
Proof Deadline: All Classifieds:
www.royalgardenbodycare.com.au FREE MOBILE APP - ROYAL BODY CARE
Review the latest property trends
St Davids Street, Fitzroy
For The Weekly Review City are as follows:
Specialising in all electrical installations • Extensions/Refurbishments • Stove/Oven/Hot water repair • Switchboard upgrades • TV/Phone/Data G6423789AA-dc5Nov Free Quotes • House Rewires • Safety switches Lic 17824 Jason 0411 300 Rec 772 17824
PH - 1300 ESCORT
By appointment 10am-11pm.
Trades & Services
PAMELA - raunchy fun blonde. Specialising in couples and anything other than vanilla sex. Private escor t. 9948 0622. swa4281be.
New Years Resolution - Lose Weight Now -
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Earn Starpoints® when you dine: westinmelbourne.com G6526551AA-dc12Dec
For more information or to receive your 2 Free CDs
BOOKINGS ARE ESSENTIAL 03.9635.2222, email@example.com
Mens Body Works Mens Body Works WE ARE THE PROFESSIONALS IN MENS GROOMING! We specialise in: • Improving your skin and looks with facials and peels • Massage (Deep Tissue, Remedial & Relaxation) • All waxing & body hair clipping (incl Brazilians for men) • Hair cuts and color from award winning stylists • Water treatments (hydrobaths & Vichy body scrubs & massages) • Manicures & Pedicures • Packages & Gift Vouchers for all occasions Christmas rs Gift Vouche Available
Mens Body Works Melbourne’s 1st and only grooming and day spa facility for men.
464 Church Street, Richmond Call us on: 9429 5400 Visit us at: www.mensbodyworks.com
©2013 Starwood Hotels & Resorts Worldwide, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Preferred Guest, SPG, Westin and their logos are the trademarks of Starwood Hotels & Resorts Worldwide, Inc., or its aﬃliates. *Menu available in December 2013 only. For full terms & conditions visit westinmelbourne.com G6526620AA-dc12Dec
DINING • LOUNGE • BEDDING • GIFTWARE • OUTDOOR FURNITURE
NEW STORE GRAND OPENING Huge DISCOUNTS on ALL STOCK! *FREE Gift Wrapping Service *(conditions apply)
100% AUSTRALIAN CUSTOM MADE & EXCLUSIVE IMPORTED FURNITURE
BUY ONLINE: www.urbanfurnituresuperstore.com.au …………………………… 13-15 Puckle Street, Moonee Ponds Tel: 9370 5115 firstname.lastname@example.org
…and Many More
OFF Quality Luggage
Best price Quality Travel Luggage & Bags Since 1918
Proudly Australian Owned & Family Run Business
9329 7713 / 9329 8294 130 Franklin St, Melbourne
www.sweeneyluggage.com.au DECEMBER 11, 2013 \ THE WEEKLY REVIEW 19
!ıĥį ÀğÃĤıßPĥį?ß íßįPæįæÑíŎįıÀį ĤıÃŉįĤPĤíçįPĲįßdğį)íĽæ´ďį Various Christmas party packages available from as little as $20 per person, book a booth and receive a free bottle of champagne on arrival or hire the entire venue!!!! Packages available everyday throughout December.
390 Lonsdale Street MELBOURNE (corner of Hardware st and Lonsdale St)