April 7 Volume 74 lbunion.com
Pinning Success How one wrestling school advocates pursuing what you love
Disclaimer and Publication Information: The Union Weekly is published using ad money and partial funding provided by the Associated Students, Inc. All Editorials are the opinions of the Union Weekly, not ASI or CSULB. All students are welcome and encouraged to be a part of the Union Weekly staff. All letters to the editor will be considered for publication. However, CSULB students will have precedence. Please include name and major for all submissions. They are subject to editing and will not be returned. Letters may or may not be edited for grammar, spelling, punctuation, and length. The Union Weekly will publish anonymous letters, articles, editorials, and illustration, but must have your name and information attached for our records. Letters to the editor should be no longer than 500 words. The Union Weekly assumes no responsibility, nor is it liable, for claims of its advertisers. Grievance procedures are available in the
“I bet you’ve never even seen a tampon.” -A fourth grader to another fourth grader.
Rose Feduk, Editor-in-Chief
Marco Beltran, Managing Editor
Connor O’Brien, Managing Editor
Eric Garcia, Advertising Exec
Rose and the Spring Break Revelation Rose Feduk Editor-in-Chief
Shereen Lisa Dudar, Opinions Editor firstname.lastname@example.org
Alfred Pallarca, Culture Editor email@example.com
Sierra Patheal, Campus Editor firstname.lastname@example.org
Molly Shannon, Food Editor email@example.com
Michael Wood, Music Editor firstname.lastname@example.org
Connor O’Brien, Art Director email@example.com
Roque Renteria, Entertainment Editor firstname.lastname@example.org
Truc Nguyen, Web Manager email@example.com
As traditional Spring Break ritual dictates, most of mine was spent indoors paying my respects to my television. I knew the gods of programming were smiling down on me when I found Hannibal Buress’ one hour comedy special Animal Furnace. In the special, Buress has a bit in which he explains that sometimes he’ll do interviews with college newspapers if he just happens to be doing a gig on campus, and sometimes the result is a horrible article. Now, the “college newspaper” is a certain breed of publication, one that sometimes carries the notion that they’re
Alyssa Keyne, Literature Editor firstname.lastname@example.org
God Warrior, Grunion Editor email@example.com
all too sure of what they’re doing yet or at least not as good as those bigger names
Chrissy Bastian, Athletics Editor firstname.lastname@example.org
Buress begins the bit by saying, “A human being wrote this, and they sent it to a higher person said, ‘yeah, let’s go with that.” The article did sound pretty terrible, and the product of either a short deadline,
Assistant Editor: Sam Winchester
Follow us @UnionWeekly
Contributors: Kevin Tran, Jennifer Cierra, Kris Schweitzer, Renee Schmiedeberg, Nadia Fonseca, Michael Honey, Helen Nguyen, Nancy Castelan, Camille Hove, Samantha Spellman, Mario Lopez, Adam Denny, Janna Jesson, Craig Gozer, Sarah Delcout, Joseph Phillips, David Hayter, Robert Sanchez, Abigail Manares, Camille Hove, Alex Berman, Maria Morales, Nancy Castelan, Trisha Davis, Andre Fragoso, Jessie Ohde, Stephanie Reynoso, Kristian Naranjo, Kealie Mardell, Chantel Stamp, Jordan Eres, and Beatriz Villa.
Questions? Comments? Crabapples?
Long Beach, CA 90815. E-mail: email@example.com
combination of the two. It included choice bits like “his performances include comedic jokes,” and that Buress tackles topics such
as “personal stories, current events, the streets, and even food.” As the head of a college newspaper, also known as “the lady that gets the go horribly wrong,” this is my constant nightmare. With the short turnover and the amount of articles and copyedits that are gone through in a single day, there’s always going to be the chance that some article gets published that maybe needed a little more TLC. The point is, it’s a scary job. Published words have weight. You never know when interviewed three years ago is going to read your words on a Comedy Central special and make you the butt of some really, really funny jokes. So if you’re up for the challenge of not fucking up an article (check out that segue,) I’d like to bring up the fact that editor applications for Fall 2014 are now available and by request through email at info@ lbunion.com. All we ask is that you love to write and that you’re interested in spending hecka messy and hecka cold.
EDITOR APPLICATIONS ARE HERE! Pick them up in our office (USU 116) or look for more information at lbunion.com
POINT/COUNTERPOINT Is it worth it to have an unpaid internship? Michael Wood Music Editor
Internships have been cast as the magical cure to the anxieties of a college going
for issues like mental health or homelessness it's often illegal. Even places like the Union Weekly,
internship out there.
for the enrichment of the campus? Or in
labor can be put to better use than to line the
Shereen Lisa Dudar Opinions Editor Most of all, internships act as a practice most times, that's not feasible.
that career path.
opportunities. Of course, the companies experiences at an internship is valuable
optional. If I submit something late, or not at all, there are consequences. That are going to have one because there is an air
In Defense of the Commons
Housing renovations are robbing students of community Kealie Mardell Contributor
The main issue here is Housing is not
enough space, the common areas can be a valuable solution.
active role in voicing the opinions of
Beyond Dexter’s Laboratory Dr. Ei-ichi Negishi, Nobel Laureate, to present at CSULB about his groundbreaking research Sierra Patheal Campus Editor On Tuesday, April 8th, the College of Natural Sciences and Mathematics Student Council will be hosting an invaluable opportunity for anyone interested in the sciences—and even, perhaps, for those who are not. Dr. Ei-ichi Negishi, recipient of the 2010 Nobel Prize in Chemistry for his research on “transition metal-catalyzed organometallic reactions for organic synthesis,” [Editor’s Note: Google Science or Wikipedia it, your choice!] will be presenting two lectures on his groundbreaking research: one for general audiences, and one with all of the technical details included. “With the technical lecture, he goes over the prize, and what he does,” CNSM Student Council President Nicolaus Coleman explained. “This is a favorite for graduate students and faculty members; it’s also eyeopening for undergraduates, but the science is more high-brow.” For underclassmen in the sciences and other interested, inquiring minds, Coleman recommends them to attend the general lecture. “As part of his general lecture, he talks about who he is, what his research is— it’s more of a scratch-the-surface type of lecture,” Coleman explained. “It’s an opportunity for a lot of people thinking about
The Fight for a Cure Relay for Life unites supporters and keeps hope alive
Sierra Patheal Campus Editor
the sciences to learn what employment and recommend a lot of freshmen go because it gives you a scope of what career options can be. It’s very exciting.” The CNSM Nobel Laureate lecture series has been held annually for 35 years, and Coleman calls it the cornerstone of events organized by the student council. “A lot of “What we hear from students and faculty goes on each year, even in times of recession, even when money is short.” The opportunity to really see what research can do can certainly be invaluable for students. “You hear about shadowing doctors, and you hear about going out and practicing zoology, but usually research is behind closed doors, and not a lot of people know about it. Still, a lot of students will discover in their years here that they are interested in it—and who better to learn about it from than a Nobel Laureate?” he said. The CNSM Nobel Laureate speakers are they are also very interested in presenting their research in interesting, accessible ways for students. “They need to be comfortable presenting something that’s more relatable to the students instead of standing up there and
talking about something that’s really highbrow,” he said. “Thankfully, with Dr. Negishi, we found a Nobel Prize winner—and a recent one, too—who is very interested in doing that for the students.” Dr. Negishi is the H.C. Brown Distinguished Professor of Chemistry at Purdue University, and he is also the recipient of the Chemical Society of Japan Award, Alexander von Humboldt Senior Researcher Award, and the ACS Award in Organometallic Chemistry. In 2011, he became a Fellow of the American Academy of Arts and Sciences, and he will be returning directly from an award ceremony in Japan to deliver his lecture at CSULB. “I thought it was incredible that not only do we have a Nobel Prize winner [coming to CSULB],” Coleman said. “But we have one
CSULB Relay for Life Event Chair Sara Rothenberg has been involved with Relay for almost a decade. “I started going in high school and then my mom was diagnosed with cancer in 2007,” she explained. “I had a lot of other family members and friends diagnosed as well… Relay is my way of giving back. I know that they fought so hard to survive, and this is my way of keeping hope
of teams involved and people there—it’s going to be really amazing.” The central purpose of the event is to raise money to support cancer research—to work toward the American Cancer Society’s dream of a world without cancer. In addition, Rothenberg highlighted the community aspects of Relay for Life, explaining, “The biggest motivator is that almost all of us have
Relay—a 24-hour marathon of support, optimism, and commemoration to raise funds against cancer—will return to CSULB at 6pm on Friday, April 18th at CSULB’s George Allen Field. The event will continue until 6pm on the 19th, punctuated by performances from local bands and dance groups, food trucks, and ceremonies of remembrance. Participants are encouraged to bring costumes and props for the themed laps, which include a Pajama Lap, a Glow-in-theDark Lap, a Zombie Lap, a Cultural Lap, a Fandom Lap, and a Masquerade Lap. “There’s something going on every hour,” Rothenberg said. “There’s a lot of entertainment, and there’s going to be a lot
cancer or are cancer survivors ourselves.” The event provides a support network to survivors, caregivers, friends, and family, giving everyone a chance to be involved and connected. “It makes you cry in a good way,” she said. It gives a sense of hope and encouragement…that we’re doing something to help the community and the cause.” Although Relay is only a couple of weeks away, Rothenberg emphasized the fact that it’s not too late to get involved. “It’s easiest to earn money if you register in advance,” she said. “But you can still register the day of the event and participate in the event.” She encouraged everyone to get involved, whether by joining a team, making a team,
that’s still being recognized. The reagents he used—which are inorganic enzymes, or catalyzers—are essentially called Negishi’s reagents, which I feel is a really good testament to how strong of a leader he is in Coleman encourages anyone interested in the sciences to attend. “It is through these experiences that students are able to enhance their academic perspectives and try to gain a foothold on what they want to do after they put on that cap and gown,” he said. “It’s not just listening to a speaker; it’s something you can truly learn from.” Both lectures are free and open to the public, and the entire campus is invited to attend. The General Lecture will be held at 11am and the Technical Lecture will be held at 4pm in the USU Ballrooms.
can even just come and see what it’s about, because you’ll want to come back.” One of the highlights of the event is the luminaria ceremony, which is held at 9pm on April 18th. During the ceremony, paper bags that have been decorated in memory of those lost to cancer and in support of those who are still fighting are illuminated from within to remember and support all who have been affected by cancer. “It’s a way to remember all our loved ones that have lost their lives and those that are currently battling,” Rothenberg remembered. “It’s sad, but it’s really heartwarming at the same time.” if you’re a survivor or if you’ve known somebody, this is something you want to participate in, any way you can,” Rothenberg concluded. “It’ll change your life.” If you are interested in joining Relay, visit the team at https://www.facebook.com/ groups/CSULBCAC/. Sara Rothenberg, event organizer, can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Cover by Connor Oâ€™Brien Art Director Words & Photos by Marco Beltran Managing Editor
8 Feature Joey “Kaos” Muñoz, owner and co-founder of Santino Bros. Wrestling Academy stands proudly in the midst of his wrestling arena.
For dates when the next training sessions begin or catch a Santino Bros. live show, visit www. santinobros.net, or follow them on Twitter (@SantinoBros) and Facebook (Santino Bros Wrestling Academy).
Don’t Spare Me the Details Getting my passion back for the sport with the help of the CSULB Bowling Team Jordan Eres Contributor
Many children have played a variety of organized sports, as a way for them to meet others, develop social skills, and of course, get some exercise. Over the years I played a wide variety of sports, all of which I enjoyed. Unlike most of my peers, I spent a very short period of time, I progressed from alley any time I could to get a few games in.
There are many great opportunities for
to put towards college. With college as a
scholarship fund. passion and love for the game only grew stronger. Those years came and went quickly
the weekends, which unfortunately cut into tournament time. Before I knew it, I had completely departed from the game with no sign of return. I started at CSULB in Fall 2011, and
this moment, I realized that their love for we had a few lanes on campus, and I thought the upcoming season, I knew I wanted to the truth was that I had no clue what I had highlight of my college years. The friends I
all good things come to an end, I had enjoyed
who not only answered all of my questions,
pace in some time. With weekly practices, to me today and I don’t see that changing for
much that I wasn’t ready to accept the fact I think my teammates hyped-up what the for the game. in tournaments all over California, and occasionally made trips to Arizona and
of Welcome, and it wasn’t until I glanced
could hide my excitement when we got there. Truth is I had no clue what to expect, and it was a complete surprise that I saw many familiar faces among my competitors.
over the last two years and I am extremely thankful that such a great organization could help renew my passion for the game. If you haven’t already, I urge you to give
Before I knew it, I was rolling 90 pounds
Long Beach State Bowling Team Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ LongBeachBowling Club Email: email@example.com Meetings: Wednesday 7-9pm in the USU Bowling
Stephanie Reynoso Contributor
I have Vitiligo, an autoimmune condition in which healthy melanin cells are killed, causing loss of pigment on parts of my skin. I have some spots on my neck, armpits, and under one of my breasts. I was really insecure about it until I started telling people that I have this disorder. When they gave me positive
my marks. He was beyond comforting and loving, and he reassured me that my The people who are closest to me accept me for being the awesome friend have even pigmentation.
day. I was so anxious and embarrassed, thinking that he would be disgusted by
these “beauty marks” (as I like to refer to them) are a feature that makes me beautiful. I fucking hate them and I wish that I had never developed them but I can accept that I am beautiful regardless and I am worthy of love, esteem, and respect from others— especially from myself. Day by day, I am learning to accept myself and place value in my appearance and my mind. We are all beautiful in one way or another—that I truly believe.
Jessie Ohde Contributor
I really wish I could see these things for myself, but sometimes you need someone self-consciousness. up with my ex-boyfriend because he insisted
“No, rrrrrrr,” my therapist would say. “Rrrrrr.” “Listen and repeat, rrrrrrrr.” “RRRR!” As a child, this was a constant scenario when I was in speech therapy. I had to do exercises like this one to improve my enunciation of certain letters. In my mind I was saying “r,” but to others my “r”s would sound like “l”s or “o”s. I felt ridiculed for doing the therapy and begged my parents to let me stop going. After trying to convince them for a while, they eventually agreed. There are times now
or ask me to repeat myself so often, or worst, look at me with utter confusion because they have no idea what I said. The thing is, I like my voice and speech in spite of the so-called impediment. I am used to the “huhs” and the “whats” and the daily me and I attribute my patience for others to this random quirk. because I have not, nor will I ever, let it having my own special dialect.
Illustration by Rose Feduk Editor-in-Chief
Body Image Issues
Andrea Fragoso Contributor
Since I was little I have always been chubby. My parents would tease me about my weight, and my classmates would call me “whale” and “fat,” to the extent that they would call my house phone just to remind me. These incidents never allowed me to feel pretty as a child. When I entered my teens, I eventually lost those pounds. However, I felt enormous, stubby, utterly unattractive, and—more importantly—hatred for myself. I hated myself so much to the point that I began having problems and harming myself. I developed depression and anorexia. My mother took me to therapy and it helped, but what helped most was changing my mindset and loving me for me: my silly jokes and my witty remarks. It dawned on me that people can hurt
you in ways that could scar you forever but the pain I faced was not my fault. Why was I punishing myself for it—starving myself and leaving my legs and arms full of scars? I began the journey to recovery. Though I relapsed a few times, I still tried my best because this life and this body are mine and deserve my full love and care. I started occupying my time with yoga and knitting. Seeing a therapist I was comfortable with and taking anti-depressants have helped me quite a lot. I am recovered from self-harming now. I know I will possibly relapse one day, but it has been two years since I did any harm. I our bodies are not the only thing that give us worth.
The Second Son Also Rises Infamous has a great new addition
Roque Renteria Entertainment Editor
I Plead The 5th Ground Zeroes is not worth the effort
The past couple of months have been a drought for PlayStation 4 fans. There have been little to no exclusive titles released that have been worth buying. Xbox fans rejoiced last month when Titanfall hit stores, and PlayStation fans were subject to their gloating. However, a few Fridays ago, Infamous: Second Son was released and the spring video game harvest was fruitful. The game takes place following the events of Infamous 2 with a new character to play as for the story. The main protagonist is a Native American male named Delsin who has had several encounters with the law; many which haven’t been too pleasant. Some of these encounters are with his older brother who is a county sheriff, which has caused some family tension. After an escaped convict holds Delsin hostage, the convict accidentally transfers his power to Delsin. As with the previous installments, it is up to the player to decide how the story will ultimately unfold, but regardless of which moral choices the player may make, hours of entertaining violence are guaranteed. Unlike its two predecessors, Second Son grants the player the ability to switch between four acquired powers, all of which
When I heard the announcement that Hideo Kojima would be making a new Metal Gear Solid for the Xbox One and PlayStation 4, I was excited. I recently purchased Metal Gear Solid Five: Ground Zeroes over the PlayStation network. The anticipation was killing me and I was hoping that this introductory game would satiate my craving for Metal Gear. But, what I realized is that Sony is trying to get as much money from its consumers as possible. Please don’t misunderstand me. This game is perfect in terms of technical craft, but is incomplete. The graphics on this game are awesome. graphics seen in the PlayStation 3 and Xbox 360 versions. The gameplay is much more
Kristian Naranjo Contributor
better and the aiming system has been improved vastly. The designers also added some new stealth kills which add more tools to your arsenal, and are fun for a while. Once you have executed all of the 10 or so new stay entertained and engaged with just one Nevertheless, the attention to detail is strikingly noticeable. Without a doubt,
Infamous 1 and 2. Fans of the series will be pleased to discover that the video game physics and engine remain the same. However, the graphics have been drastically improved for the nextgeneration console. After doing a sideby-side comparison, I was pleased to see that the progression of pixels continue to improve throughout the series. If Infamous: Second Son is a sample of what we are to expect from the PlayStation 4, then by all means, outstretch your hands and celebrate the awesomeness that will inevitably occur. I also enjoyed the fact that the games in the series have progressively gotten more violent, which make for a better gaming experience. The original Infamous was rated “T for Teen” and lacked the same kind of bravado that Second Son has. As the game increases the amount of pints per blood per frame, I feel that the moral dilemmas you face are far more potent. When you kill an enemy, you immediately see the intensity of your moral ramifications. Not exactly the best form of verisimilitude, but it adds to the storyline. The biggest complaint I have with Second Son is that it can be a little redundant. It is a free roam game that allows players to access various parts of
the map and complete side missions or keep the story line moving at any time. At times, the side missions feel repetitive and create a sense of unwanted dejà vu. If you are a gamer who strives for 100% completion, I will warn you that there are times when your eyes may begin to close due to boredom. However, if you’re a gamer who enjoys completing only the storyline and investing a few of your precious hours in virtual reality, then this will not be an issue for you. And, just for the sake of nitpicking, I also didn’t like the story line. There were too many cliches. At times, the dialogue is a little awkward and you can’t get much emotional range from pixelated people. Then again, it is a video game. And who the hell plays a video game for its compelling storyline? Here’s looking at you, The Last of Us. Overall, I give Second Son a 9 out of 10. Sucker Punch, the production company behind the game has delivered again and has not disappointed their fans. Sucker Punch has found its golden goose. Second Son is a must-own for PlayStation owners and will someday become a greatest hits title. Pick it up today so you can brag to your hipster friends about how you played it before it became a classic.
Ground Zeroes is the most aesthetically pleasing game in the Metal Gear series. This is not surprising because Konami never fails to deliver on its latest title. For example, it is raining during the mission, and you notice
hollow, as if it were a skeleton of a game. What’s most disappointing is that Sony is charging $30 for this game, which is a ridiculous amount of money for this fragment of the game. I would gladly pay $30 for the entire Metal Gear Five game. Hell, I would even pay double, which is more likely to happen. I would advise all fans of the series to wait a few more years until the completed title is released so you don’t waste time or money. Knowing Sony and knowing Konami, they will probably release this prologue, along with all the other segments, alongside the full storyline. Until
gear, and how the rain collects in puddles throughout several parts of the map. Also, the amount of environment you can destroy is incredible. I imagine I could reduce everything to rubble had I enough bullets. The designers really pushed the gaming engine as much as they could on this one. As amazing as the graphics and overall gameplay experience is, the game feels
Kings of the Sound Space No caffeine required for this energetic experience
Chantel Stamp Contributor
A very large band and a very small venue collided March 24th at 5pm the Kings of Leon took the stage at the Red Bull Sound Space in Los Angeles. They played a 55-minute set for a 200 person live crowd along with the thousands of people streaming live all over the world. Walking time, I was amazed at exactly how tiny it was. The space was surprisingly smaller than the Nugget on campus. It’s decked out in black walls adorned with the names and signatures of all the artists that have graced its stage in the past. With a band of such magnitude as Kings of Leon, it was a bit shocking to think that within the next 10 minutes they would be beating their drums, strumming their guitars, and belting out your favorite songs 10 feet away from the audience. At 5pm KROQ DJ Stryker, calmly introduced Kings Of Leon and they took the stage, opening with their soulfully mellow hit “Crawl.”
Throughout the performance I couldn’t stop myself from thinking about how bizarre it all was. I wouldn’t consider myself to be an all-knowing expert on live music, but I’ve been to my fair share of concerts. I’ve experienced the “so far up into the stands you can only see the band on the big screen” show and the “pushing through the standing room only crowd to get as close as you possibly can” concert. But never in my life have I ever been so up close and personal with a band whose music I admire so much. This band, who sells out arenas across the country, was performing right in front of me as if I were in a garage watching the neighborhood band perform. With a sore voice that lead singer Caleb Followill attributed to getting a little too crazy last night, he encouraged the crowd to help him sing, but never did he ease up on bellowing his soulful tones along with the familiar, soulful and catchy melodies that made the band a household name.
The loudest uproar occurred when they played their older hits like “The Bucket” and “On Call.” The show was simple and that’s everything that it needed to be. It was all about the music and the intimacy. It was so cozy that it almost felt unreal. You weren’t just listening to the music, it was surrounding you. It was in your face. I felt like I was a part of every song and every song was played with their signature raw energy that I hear through my speakers while I’m speeding down PCH because I’m late to class. Simply put, I had high expectations for their performance and my expectations were all met beautifully. They ended with their hit single “Sex on Fire” and a thank you and it was all over way too fast. We always think that bigger is always better (in whatever aspect you like to apply the concept); but the Red Bull Sound Space makes you appreciate the little things in life. Add the Kings of Leon to it and appreciation becomes admiration.
You’re Actually Kinda Good At This A track by track review of Struckout’s new EP Struckout is a post-hardcore punk band from Long Beach making noise with their new EP ‘You Are Not Good At This’. When I looked at Struckout’s last EP I’d Hate Me Too (June 2013) I saw the potential for something big hiding behind the rough edges. These new recordings have taken this potential, mashed it up and spat it back out with more force than you can imagine. Released for digital download on progression for the band showcasing their intense sound. Opening up with full force and some strong guitar melodies is the track “Maybe I’m Ed Wood,” catching your attention and setting the scene for things to come. Next up is “Polaroid Of A Punchbowl,” introducing the ability to mix up their tempos with a melancholy feel. The shortest track, yet perhaps one of my favorites, is the climactic “KEMF.” A true taste of Speer’s best vocals with a strong punk essence, there’s so much exasperated
their original singles, we’re thrown back thrashing intro of “Avoiding Parables.” You Are Not Good At This also features a Modest Mouse cover. You can download their cover of “Styrofoam Boots / It’s All Nice On Ice, Alright” for free if you can’t scrape together the three dollars for the full EP —Although at just three dollars it’s a steal and well worth it. If you get the chance to catch Struckout at one of their local shows, you’d be mad to miss it. Their live performances are packed full of raw energy, which translates really well onto this new release. Struckout is captivating, with tight talent and a wide variety of sounds within their capabilities. James Goldmann’s drums maintain an enticing backdrop for Daniel Speer’s angst ridden vocals, with some great play between his bass and the guitars of Ian Horelica. With physical releases expected in the future, for now you can download your copy of You Are Not Good At This from struckoutmusic.bandcamp.com
Kealie Mardell Contributor
A Short Story by Camille Hove Staffer
Illustration by Rose Feduk Editor-in-Chief
Marshall’s eyes probed mine like a tiger watching his prey. I scooted back on the bed, my feet little caterpillars beneath me. He reached forward and brought me back, his hands grasping my waist like a frog kissing a tree. I hesitated. “Your hands are like icicles.” His tongue applied pressure to the base of my wrist. “Are you calling me unique?” “Of course.” His lips touched my palms. My stomach clenched. “I’d like to see you in the snow, the falling drifts lighting up your hair.” “I don’t do well in the cold.” “I know, honey. You’re a panther that needs to dream in the sun.” “But I don’t dream.” “You just don’t remember them. I think you’re too worried about everything else to bother with images that aren’t real.” He clasped my hands to his, running his
“I don’t know how you like both. You’re happy with the sun in your hair or the cold in your eyes. You’d love the warmth of Thailand.” “I’d love it because you’d be there. I’ll follow you anywhere, you know.” I leaned forward and brushed my eyelids to his, the turtles jumping around in my stomach. “Do we have to do anything today?” I laid my head in his lap. “Can we just build a tent and hide from everyone?” “Everyone or everything?” He tickled my hair back from my face. “Both. I can’t handle reality today. Let’s bake cookies.” “You’re not allowed to touch the oven.” “You bake cookies. I’ll lean provocatively against the counter. I know you love that.” “I’d rather you wear a burka. With thick socks.” “You just don’t want anyone to steal me away from you.” “I don’t care about that. As if you’d leave anyway. I’m a man of modesty.”
“Oh jeez.” I rolled my eyes but smiled. I picked at the hair in his beard, playing with
and I laughed as he stretched out. My body molded to his crevices. “Happy?” “Uh huh. Don’t leave.” “I won’t.” “Promise?” We held up pinkies. Our skin connected at the folds in our knuckles, the lines etching together like petals. “Don’t be sad, when I leave.” I tried to nod. “When we’re seven thousand miles apart, I won’t be able to reach you with my hands, but I can capture you with my words.”
Kayleigh Quarterman Contributor
Alfred Pallarca Culture Editor
a small kitten curled in the blankets, my feet wrapped around his waist.
squirmed. “That’s one of your best qualities, you know.” “Keeping women clothed? I’d have to say it’s admirable of a man.” “You wooed me with your words, not your hands.” “I may be an alien if you’re saying that.” “Sex isn’t everything.” He stood up and dumped me on the bed. My t-shirt stuck to my back. I kicked the covers down; watching my toes curl like miniature waves. “Stay still.” He grabbed the blanket and tucked it into the bookshelf, using the guitar
onto my face, the threads forming to my nose as I breathed in, and then releasing. He picked the other side up and placed it beneath an econ book on the other shelf. Balanced over the desk chair, our haven was complete. “Scoot.” He crawled in next to me
Illustration by Sierra Patheal Campus Editor
Chrissy Bastian Athletics Editor
More Sour Than Sweet Is LA’s Lemonade Overrated? Nancy Castelan Contributor If you live in Southern California, you’ve probably encountered pictures of the cups with “lemonade” written on them. Or, if your guilty pleasures include watching beauty guru videos, you’ve probably heard them talk on and on about “Lemonade,” a Los Angeles-based cafe chain. After months and months of being bombarded with Instagram pictures of people going to
Lemonade, I decided to give it a shot. Upon entering the establishment, I instantly felt a crowd of people out for lunch. Maybe it was the fact that I got there during their lunch rush, or the fact that ordering food was very confusing, but I don’t think I’ll put myself through an experience like this again. The wait was your average 10 minutes but, once I got to the counter, I became overwhelmed by all of the portions they and vegetables mixed together with various sauces. After getting entrees from the “land and sea” section I picked hot foods, dessert, and, lastly, their famous lemonade. I ended up getting two portions and a warmed up chicken breast that tasted nothing like chicken. I paid a vast amount of money for food that I ended up throwing away. It didn’t live up to the hype and I wouldn’t waste my money on food like that again. I feel like this place is overrated. Yes, its lemonade is pretty tasty, but is it worth $3.50? I don’t think so.
Dangerously Delicious Albatros Mexican Food’s worth your while Trisha Davis Staffer Walk into Albatros in Lake Forest and get ready for some awesome traditional Mexican food with a Californian twist! Also get ready for a hole-in-the-wall place that only takes cash and has a slightly sketchy atmosphere. Albatros is shady because of the fatal stabbing that happened there around three years ago, and the numerous incidents that have occurred since then. This is why there is a security guard every night. In spite of all this, the line is almost constant, especially late at night, and to me it seems that the stabbing somehow
managed (surprisingly) to make Albatros even more popular. This unfortunate event is how I ended up hearing about Albatros. and, even though they were a bit worried and actually a little mad at me for taking them to such a seedy place, they got hooked. If you ever do end up going, I recommend the California Burrito, which is fairly sized for the price, or their most popular item: the Carne Asada Fries. Of course try my personal favorite, the horchata! I encourage everyone to give them a chance.
Volume 74 Issue 10
Monday, April 7, 2014
DISCLAIMER: Hey, God Warrior Here. I walk a lonely road. The only road that I have ever known. Don’t know where it goes, but it’s only me and I walk alone. Uh-uh, uh-uh, yeah. In this busy street, something about the Boulevard of Broken Dreams. Something, something. Does this city...sleep? Oh hell. Send your Green Day fanmail to 1212 Bellflower Blvd Suite 239, Long Beach, CA 90815. This page is satire/parody and does not represent ASI nor the CSULB campus. In Billie Joe Armstrong’s eyeliner I pray that you submit all of your “Dookie” via email to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Listen up, Internetters.
by Earth, Planet
by Griselda Mubbins
1. Hot Pockets
RECENT EARTHQUAKES DETERMINED TO BE RESULT OF UPCOMING IRON GIANT SEQUEL
STINKY INDIE TREND SIGNIFIES COLLAPSE OF THE SOCK MARKET
HOMICIDAL DOG SENTENCED TO LIFE AS A