Page 1

Greek Week signs vandalized, page 6

Nonprofit minor, page 4



VOL. 88, ISSUE 10

Montevallo: a liberal liability or a price worth paying? BY HEATHER BUCKNER, EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

Recently “The Atlantic” published an article based on’s ranking of Montevallo among the 11 least valuable universities in the nation, stating that UM’s return on investment for out-of-state students is -$60,200. This means that, according to their research, not attending college would make you $30,000 richer than graduating. Since the information was released, researchers, alumni and current members of the university have been debating it, referencing a number of problems with PayScale’s research methodology.

importantly, self-reported data on salary is just notoriously tricky.” The site then linked to a study revealing wide variations in actual versus reported salaries among its respondents. Associate professor of art Kelly Wacker agreed that the analysis, based off 78 reports, was “flawed and based on limited and self-reported data” — data that, because of its nature, is impossible to check for absolute accuracy. Another problem AroundLearning pointed to was that sites like PayScale oversample young workers new to the job

It is morally bankrupt to define value based solely on income generation. Around Learning. com (a website created by a former teacher, institutional researcher and self-proclaimed student of public policy) pointed out nine mistakes with the website’s method. First, the form and setting where the data is collected are not conducive to accuracy. PayScale is the largest private tracker of U.S. salaries, offering information on salary, benefits and compensation with one stipulation — the person seeking the information must first provide their own. This means all of the information is user generated, or crowd sourced. This also means “the survey is typically filled out quickly in an attempt to get to the information of interest,” debated AroundLearning. “On top of that, and perhaps even more

market — “looking at the response pool for any college, typically only about 10-15 percent have 10 or more years of experience.” Furthermore, “Payscale logically but problematically excludes anyone with an advanced degree.” So, though the website claims to show projections for mid-career earnings, AroundLearning argued that “users of any online salary comparison tool are more likely to be young, white-collar workers.” Alumnus Patrick Evans publicly commented on reporter Evan Belanger’s rehashing of the information, saying it was ridiculous for the study to choose out-of-state tuition for Montevallo because “it does not reflect the reality of the majority of Montevallo alums.”

See PAYSCALE, page 3



There were only 78 responses from UM alumni.

According to the study, attending Montevallo has an expected return of

-$60,200 That means not attending Montevallo would make you


richer than if you had gotten a degree.


Data collected from US News & World Report

Hannah Stein / Alabamian




The sample size was less than one half of one percentage point of all UM alumni.* 19%

However, this data is based on outof-state tuition, which is on average almost double in-state tuition. out-of-state

The average graduating class has 2,500 undergrad and 500 graduate students.

12% 9%

7% 8%

The five most popular majors of the 2012 class

• visual & performing arts - 19% • business & management - 12% • education - 9% • health professions - 8% • FACS & human sciences - 7%

*Correction from print: The sample size percentage is taking all alumni into account. Only considering one year’s graduating class, the sample size was 2.6 percent.


At 5:30 p.m. on April 2, SGA president Rachael Swokowski announced that UPC Coordinator Tanya Hoang won the bid for SGA presidency during the 2014 SGA elections. “It’s all still so surreal,” Hoang beamed minutes after the election results were announced. “I’m thrilled to work with the newly elected exec board and am so thankful for all of my supporters throughout this.” Hoang won 55 percent of the vote against SGA president pro tempore Eddie Davis and vice president Jonathan Evans. Both of Hoang’s opponents rushed to hug and congratulate her after the announcement. Other winners include newly elected SGA vice president Ondrea Lee and senior class president Quincy Hall.

Photo by Reed Strength

Tanya Hoang’s name is called as the 2014-2015 SGA president.

INSIDE this issue

See SGA, page 6

Next issue: “Goat Simulator” — good or bahhh’d?

News in Brief MONTEVALLO, Ala. — Award-winning author Margaret Winkle of Birmingham will speak at Eclipse Coffee and Books on April 8 at 3 p.m. Winkle’s novel “Wash,” a story about a slave forced to breed for his owner during the days of Westward Expansion, was listed as one of the Wall Street Journal’s “10 Best Novels of 2013.” The Montevallo branch of the American Association of University Women (AAUW) is sponsoring the event. Winkle will read from her novel, answer questions and conclude her time with a book signing. The event is free of charge and open to the public. MONTEVALLO, Ala. — The Tour De Cure fundraiser will take place at the University of Montevallo on April 5 to raise money for the American Diabetes Association. The event organizers hope to raise more than $200,000 for the cause. As of March 31, the event has raised more than $80,000 with 29 teams and 178 overall riders. Cyclists are asked to pay a $25 registration fee and have the option of completing a 17, 44, 63 or one hundred mile route. In addition to biking, a healthy living vendors’ fair and kids area will be present. Live music by The Bill Ledbetter Project and Atticus Avenue will provide a soundtrack for the event. MONTEVALLO, Ala. — A woman crashed a sport utility vehicle into an exterior wall of the Montevallo Drug Co. building on Highway 25 near Lucky’s. The crash reportedly happened around 1 p.m. on March 31. The store was in operation, but no one was injured. According to police the vehicle was removed from the crash site and the driver was gone. Despite the caved in wall and scattered shelves, the store stayed open throughout the day and plans for repairs to be made soon. MONTEVALLO, Ala. — On Tuesday, April 1 the judge issued an order for extension in the case of Christian Todd Slaton, former UM student facing four felony counts of animal cruelty for killing and displaying cats on campus. The hearing was listed as a status hearing to determine whether Slaton will be granted a youthful offender status. MONTGOMERY, Ala. — More than 1,000 gambling machines were seized from casinos in Greene County, Ala., early on the morning of March 31. Three electronic bingo halls were raided and shut down per the orders of Alabama Attorney General Luther Strange. While they are not actual slot machines, Strange said the lookalikes are “in open defiance of state law.” The employees and operators of these establishment say that the machines are merely designed in the form of slot machines for entertainment.



Letter to the Editor CONTRIBUTED BY FRED COOPER ’65

I’ve never been one to dispute the declarations of literary giants, but on a late morning in July, I discovered that Thomas Wolfe was incorrect about his musings on home and how you can’t go back and all. Reynolds Hall was right where I left it in 1965. So were Main and Calkins and the brick sidewalks and streets leading to the infirmary and Ramsay. But 2012 was waiting right there to grab me and shake me back into reality. For instance, for old Alabama College students like me who knew exactly where the post office was, it’s gone. I don’t know where it went. At least the doors were still there. I can’t say that about the one leading into the Tea House. It was gone, too. I mean, it isn’t there anymore. No door. Just white brick. For those of you who came after 1965 and don’t know, the Tea House was the gathering place in Reynolds where we sat, talked, drank cokes, ate snacks and listened to the free jukebox. The Tea House porch was equally missing. The porch was where I sat as a freshman in the evening quiet, slightly away from the table where the upperclassmen intellects discussed great issues, said clever things and expressed deep thoughts which could become humorous at the mere turn of a phrase. I soaked it all up in the shadows, wondering if I would ever be that smart or clever or humorous. I would have gone upstairs to visit Reynolds Experimental Theater, WRSD Radio, and the Alabamian student newspaper office where my spotty writing career had its start but I couldn’t find the stairs. There used to be stairs. Used to be a porch, too. And a door.

The Tea House was the gathering place in Reynolds where we sat, talked, drank cokes, ate snacks and listened to the free jukebox. In discovering things from the past that are now missing, I found there’s also some new stuff. For instance, you can no longer turn right at Ramsay, at least if you’re in a car. Everybody at Montevallo apparently has a car. And they’re parked everywhere. I remember the student outrage in 1961 when then-President Phillips was castigated for plowing up greenery to build two new parking lots. Who needed parking lots! It was a campus that called for leisurely strolling. Well, these days a few more lots might be helpful to get the parked cars off of those narrow brick streets that were designed for narrow wagon passage. Bloch was where the smart science people hung out so except for freshman chemistry and physics, I gave that building a wide berth. There had been pictures of various science events from history on the first floor with funny captions on them, and that’s all that recommended Bloch to me. Comer’s where I spent most of my academic time, but to tell the truth, see-

ing it again didn’t stir much emotion. I did, however, go into Palmer Hall. Thomas Waverly Palmer Hall. I wore my class ring every day that I was in the Air Force after I graduated and every day, I would look at the etching of Palmer on that ring and wish with every fiber in me that I was back in that building where there were so many college theater and College Night productions, where there had been convocations and eventually a graduation that I really didn’t want. We used to refer to the “acoustically perfect 1600-seat Palmer Auditorium” in news releases. I have no idea if that was true or if it was, how we knew, but nobody ever challenged us about our claim. What I wanted to do most of all was go down the steps into what probably was originally a storeroom but was the News Bureau when I worked there as a student writer/photographer. Steve Huffstutler and the late Ed Blake decided maybe there was a possibility that they could teach this unskilled neophyte how to discipline some wildly undisciplined writing into acceptable news copy and how to compose a news photo, skills that later shaped my entire work career. I will always be grateful for their instruction and their patience. It was time to go. I had seen things that I hadn’t seen for while and a few things I’d never seen before and I was ready to leave. I walked across the quadrangle and remembered a part of the final column I wrote for the Alabamian in 1965. The column reflected on the friends and events and classes that had been my life and my classmates’ lives for the previous four years, how this journey we had started so long ago was now coming to an end. It was time to say goodbye As I walked from Palmer to my car, I spotted something else that hadn’t been there during my four years. In the middle of the quadrangle is a section of bricks embedded in the grass. Each brick had a name or names on them, several with designations indicating a specific connection to the school. I recognized a few of the names. It occurred to me that many others have stopped and read those names and probably wondered who these people were but the names were there, permanently. While I was at Alabama College from 1961 through 1965, I had a contribution to the Tower literary magazine, wrote two plays, three Montages and countless columns for the Alabamian but the only permanent record of my having been there had been the wall in the lighting cage of Palmer Auditorium. Pam St. John and I had worked the lights for a theater production in 1962 and in keeping with tradition, carved our names in the wall next to the lighting board. In the 70s, the board was replaced along with the wall with all the carved names. I remember when the offer came for alumni and friends to buy a brick which would establish a permanent reminder of their connection to the school and I passed on it so there is no place that visitors to this little plot of land that I love can look at and say “I wonder who Fred Cooper was.” I wish now I’d bought a brick.

Counseling Corner

Seeing change as a positive experience COURTESY OF THE AMERICAN COUNSELING ASSOCIATION

It's inevitable. Change happens, but it doesn’t have to be upsetting or a negative situation. There are things you can do to emphasize the good in it. • Use your support network — If a change has you feeling sad, confused or overwhelmed, look for support from others. It may be family or friends who are willing to listen in a non-judgmental way. Or you may be more comfortable speaking with a member of the clergy or a therapist. It may surprise you to receive help and support from unexpected places. • List the stable things in your life — When things are changing it's easy to feel totally off balance, but the reality in most cases is that there are many things in your life, from friends and family who love you to familiar daily routines that will still be there for you. Simply listing them can remind you of the stability still in your life. • Give yourself time — Life changes can

happen in an instant, but orienting yourself to what has ended and what is coming can take time. Losing a job, experiencing the death of someone close, being widowed or divorced — they're all changes in which you need to allow yourself time to adjust to your new life situation. • Explore the opportunities in the transition — It's often said that for every door that closes, another door opens. When a change happens, take the time to explore what new chances and options it may be bringing. Think in different directions and about the new things that might be possible. For most of us, change is never easy but it often provides opportunities that might otherwise have been missed. Approach change as a positive experience and you just may find it is. "Counseling Corner" is provided by the American Counseling Association. Comments and questions to or visit the ACA website at

Talking with Talula For advice written by students for students, write to Your name will be completely anonymous, so feel free to ask anything! Dear Talula, I’m asexual. There, I said it. To think that I’m coming out to a help column seems absurd, but that’s kind of my issue. You see, there have been several occasions when my closest friends have dismissed the idea of asexuality as a legitimate sexual orientation. Some have even gone so far as to denounce anyone who claims to be ace as “a whiny pre-teen looking for attention.” This is absurd, yes, but it also is extremely hurtful. I really want to come out to my friends, but I’m afraid that they will roll their eyes and discredit me for who I really am. Although my personal sex life (or lack thereof) has little to do with my friends, it still sucks that I can’t truly be myself when I am with them. What can I do Talula? Sincerely, Amanda Ace Dear Amanda Ace, Every few decades, a social movement takes place that allows a generation to truly shine and prove the wide open expanse of humanity. We are a part of the generation providing the beating heart of one of those movements right now, as the scope of sexual orientation is widened, both legally and socially. College is an excellent time of self discovery, and therefore a perfect moment in your life to reveal to others who you truly believe you are. While you may have been aware of how you’ve felt since your early teens or younger, I’m thrilled that you feel comfortable enough to begin telling those

close to you. I truly believe that beginning to share that side of yourself will only make you feel more secure in your own skin. Now, as for your friends, it sounds like they are dismissing the idea without having ever engaged with or listened to an actual perspective from an asexual person. That’s why I think you should be their first. Who better to help them understand your lifestyle then you? Now, they may ask questions. They may delve a bit more into your personal life and your past relationships that you’d be personally comfortable with. Be patient with them. What has been clear in your mind for so long is obviously less easy for them to piece together. Now, if these people are your real and true friends, they will accept you for who you are and will most likely feel honored that you feel comfortable enough to come out to them. If they’re rude and offensive, hold steadfast and strong. It’s a tough position to hoist a middle finger and keep it held firmly in the air, but you may have to follow a related course of action to get the point across that you can’t change who you are. Hopefully, however, you’ll receive encouraging smiles and comforting hugs. If you can take that first step successfully, you will be on your way to living not as “Amanda Ace,” but who you are without need of the indicative last name. I’m proud of you Amanda, and I know others will be too. Best of luck,

On the bricks with Sammy Schiffman

• Name • Organization • How do you feel about the vandalism that was committed to the Greek week signs?

Peyton Williams • Alpha Delta Pi. • Its sad, but we’re Greeks. We’re strong; it’s not going to bring us down.

Talula Farmer Hall, behind Post Office Station 6222 Montevallo, AL 35115 205-665-6222

Editor-in-Chief Heather Buckner Managing Editor, Production Hannah Stein Managing Editor, Content Reed Strength Copy Editor Joe Tutwiler Online Editor Connor Bucy Film Critic Mandy Steadman

David Singleton • Alpha Kappa Lambda. • It’s kind of childish. I’d like to know why they did it. What did we ever do to them, ya know?

Audrey Barron • Phi Mu. • Very bad. A girl named Amanda Smith worked very hard on that sign. She spent hours working on that before spring break.

Jonathan Cannon • Alpha Tau Omega. • I was kind of surprised. It’s usually the Greeks that pull the pranks, not unassociated — assuming it was a nonassociate.

Quincy Hall • Lambda Chi Alpha. • I feel it was very immature and childish, we are in college and we are adults. They are being disrespectful to Greeks who are trying to promote diversity.

Staff Writers: Charitina Goebel Keri Higginbotham Corey Johnson Kayla McLaughlin Umar Nadir Sammy Schiffman Hayley Stewart Jordan Wales Britney Williams Adviser: Tiffany Roskamp-Bunt

The Alabamian is published twice monthly. As the campus newspaper of the University of Montevallo, this paper dedicates itself to the accurate presentation of the news of the university community, to reporting the news of all segments of that community, students, faculty, administrators, the board of trustees, alumni, and friends of the university. Further, it serves as a forum of opinion for the exchange of ideas among all its constituent groups. To that end, it operates without undue influence or control by any one of those constituent groups. The opinions expressed on this page are not necessarily those of the university, its officials, its faculty, or the student body.




Environmental Studies blooms with new classes BY REED STRENGTH

Spring is in full swing on campus. As students stuff winter clothes into cold closet spaces and break out lighter summer wear, the trees are starting to gain back their green leafy splendor. The climate isn’t the only influence the environment is having on campus. The environmental studies department is also showing signs of blooming with a plethora of new classes being offered for the Fall term.

move towards sustainable living in environment and sustainability. This class will also introduce Dr. Susan Caplow as a tenure-track faculty member in Fall 2014. Wicknick said Caplow will be fresh from earning her Ph.D. in environment and ecology from UNC Chapel Hill. However, other courses take a more creative approach to understanding environmental factors in one’s life. In Psychogeography and the Creative Writer, Profes-

Photo by Reed Strength According to Jill Wicknick, the co coordinator of the environmental studies program, “More than 25% of full-time UM faculty have taught classes, given guest lectures, or mentored an independent project for an ES student.” “Though the minor remains small, the program has ballooned beyond our expectations,” added other co-coordinator associate professor of English Lee Rozelle. “In fact, it was necessary for us to hire a new environmental studies professor to administer these programs and teach core ES classes, which is exciting.” With its website page promising a “green edge in a 21st century job market,” a minor in environmental studies allows students to not only learn about the benefits of living a green lifestyle but also the socio-economic implications behind the practice. Students will learn about balancing those factors in addition to the give and take of human society to

sor Bryn Chancellor will instruct students on the effects our surroundings have on our writing style and creative impulses. According to Chancellor, the idea for the course was born after she gave a guest lecture in a ES 200 class two years ago. At the end of the lecture, she allowed the class to do writing exercises and realized the potential interest available. “By going out and walking their regional environments, focusing on keen observation and analysis, students will likely observe/become aware of aspects that they might not have considered,” Chancellor said. Similarly, in Conservation, Colonialism, and the (Eco)Tourist, the differing ideas of environmental practice in different cultures and how one advertises eco-friendly practices in travel writing will be explored. Episcopal pastor and adjunct instructor John Wesley will once again teach students about the relationship between spiritualism and the greater purpose of a green

Governer Bentley signs Carly’s Law Governor Robert Bentley on Tuesday officially signed Senate Bill 174, also known as Carly’s Law. The legislation will allow a study at the University of Alabama at Birmingham to examine the effectiveness of cannabidiol oil to treat seizure disorders such as epilepsy. It was named in honor of 3-year-old Carly Chandler of Birmingham, who suffers from a severe neurological disorder. “As a doctor, I have always been supportive of medical research to discover new medicines that may be able to cure or treat some of our most chronic

diseases,” Governor Robert Bentley said. “ From the beginning, I supported a clinical trial of cannabidiol oil to research the effectiveness of helping patients with debilitating seizure disorders. Alabama has the best research institutions in the country, and I hope this Alabamaled medical study can bring relief to children, like Carly Chandler. I appreciate the efforts of Carly’s parents to get this bill passed by the Legislature, and I am honored to officially sign it today.” Carly’s Law will be effective on June 1, 2014.

lifestyle in Religion & Ecology. From passages in the Bible that call for man to care for its home to more contemporary new age ideas on Mother Earth and nature as a personified being, those in attendance are encouraged to create and share their own views on spiritual ecology. Wesley said last semester’s class was full of “lively and productive” discussion. “I think we all share gratitude to the University for adding the Environmental Studies program to the curriculum.” For those looking for a more technological route, Introduction to Geographic Information Systems will offer training with geographic mapping technology. Instructed by assistant professor Virginia Ochoa-Winemiller of geography, the environmental aspects of vegetation, climate and water systems comes into play when designing maps with GIS software. These variables and more are used to not only create detailed maps, but are also useful as a predictive tool that can help the user make decisions based on future changes or patterns identified through the system “GIS allows you to make ‘pretty maps’ and use them to answer any question from an spatial (or geographic) perspective,” said Ochoa-Winemiller. All of these courses will be offered in the Fall term and many are cross listed with other departments. According to Rozelle, faculty members from every college have submitted ideas for ES classes. He calls the ES program a “genuine expression of the Montevallo community.” For now, the coordinators are focusing on developing the ES Minor and promoting its growth. However, Wicknick says that Provost Dr. Suzanne Ozment has expressed interest in developing an ES Major, a concept still in its early “green” idea stage For more information on Environmental Studies opportunities offered on campus, a list of ES courses and a checksheet for the minor are available on ForUM under a tab on the same page as the Department of Biology, Chemistry and Mathematics.

What’s an Easter egg hunt without candy? Parnell Memorial Library is in need of candy donations for its annual Easter egg hunts! Donations can be dropped off at the circulation desk.

PAYSCALE: Kristine Mascetti, director of UM’s institutional research planning and assessment, said about five percent of students currently enrolled are from out of state. Wacker disagreed with “The Atlantic”’s assessment on a more fundamental level, however, saying, “It is morally bankrupt to define value based solely on income generation.” Collin Williams, associate professor of art, agreed, stating, “these kinds of rankings are essentially meaningless for many reasons but primarily because of the flawed assumption that money is the only measure of success.” If the goal is to measure income, however, readers should expect tech schools to top the charts. “Slate” magazine reported on the findings, “Tech and engineering…tend to be the highest paid undergraduate majors. And because this ranking doesn’t include graduates who earn advanced degrees later on — so no doctors, lawyers, or MBAs — the advantage is naturally going to lie with the tech schools.” Huffington Post stat-

Still searching Authorities are saying the search for the missing Malaysia Airlines Flight 370 is the “most challenging” ever seen. Debris sightings Previous search areas

Flight’s possible routes Search area March 31 0 mi. . 1,15 x o r p Ap km) (1,770

Indian Ocean 500 miles 500 km Source: ESRI, BBC, Australian Maritime Safety Authority

ed, “It’s no surprise that with engineering majors ranking among the top for highest earning graduates, many of the schools whose alumni earn the most have robust engineering programs.” Montevallo, on the other hand, “produces a high [percentage] of teachers. Thus, it’s not surprising that their earnings over 20 years aren’t as high as many other colleges,” said one comment on “I consider this more of an indictment against low teacher salaries than against Montevallo.” While several liberal arts colleges around the nation have been confronted with the allegation that a student’s earning power won’t increase enough to justify the cost of their tuition, Williams countered with insight into the value of a liberal arts education: “This kind of thinking is the cancer that is eating away at our culture, and the anecdote is an education that values personal growth, creative thinking, a breadth of knowledge and deeply rewarding intellectual development over dollar signs.”

Search for missing jet continues BY REED STRENGTH

As the search continues for the AUSTRALIA missing Boeing 777 with 239 passengers on board, a new question of what was Perth thought to be fact about the mysterious case has surfaced. Earlier in the investigation, officials reported that a recorded message of the last words spoken by the cockpit of the plane were “Alright, good night.” Now, © 2014 MCT

Malaysian authorities say the message actually read “Good night Malaysian three seven zero.” While there are no real discrepancies between the two messages’ different wording, foreign officials question why Malaysian authorities released the wrong wording of the message in such a sensitive investigation.



Student interest in nonprofits brings about potential minor BY HAYLEY STEWART

Non-profit organization are growing. According to the Nonprofit Quarterly, “The nonprofit sector is the thirdlargest workforce in the United States, behind retail and manufacturing.” With this rate of growth in mind, business professor Tom J. Sanders is currently teaching a course on nonprofit organizations. “I started off the course limited to 20 students,” Sanders said, “It filled up the first day, so I doubled it to 40, and even after that I’ve had to turn down at least six students hoping to join.” He is amazed by the amount of interest and pleased that his students are from a variety of majors. Sanders, who worked in the nonprofit sector for 30 years before becoming a professor, is now working to take this enthusiasm about the class and transform it into a full-fledged minor. “I’ve made a proposal to the dean about starting a nonprofit studies minor,” he said. Sanders would like for it to be under interdisciplinary studies and modeled after the environmental studies minor. He said there would be three required courses and three electives from related content areas. Sanders is most excited for the prospective minor opening doors for a wide range of students. Alyssa Jenkins, a senior majoring in art with a psychology minor is currently enrolled in the nonprofit course. She has past work as a traveling representative for Liberty in North Korea. “The organization works towards redirecting the politics of North Korea to the people, rescuing and resettling North Korean refugees and also researching what problems are going on now,” said Jenkins. “So that they can not only put a Band-Aid on the issue but also help it in the long run.” Her time spent improving others’ lives also made her reflect upon her own. “I found that I had a true passion for nonprofit organizations,” she recalled. “I also figured out that I wasn’t completely happy with my future and that I wanted to help people more than anything.” Jenkins said she hopes to eventually become a clinical counselor in the nonprofit field, with a special interest in assisting refugees and defectors. Another student with extensive

nonprofit experience is Lydia Clements. She is a junior with a double major in psychology and social work and could very well see herself working in the nonprofit sector. She currently works at the Crisis Center of Birmingham as an over the phone counselor. “The Center is a program through United Way. It has multiple branches that incorporate different ways of helping people,” she said. “The one I’ve worked with the most is the Crisis Line, which provides free counseling to those living in Alabama 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.”

I started off the course limited to 20 students. It filled up the first day, so I doubled it to 40, and even after that I’ve had to turn down at least six students hoping to join. Through her work, Clements has not only enjoyed assisting others, but also feels it helped her grow as a person. “Volunteering has helped me be less judgmental than those who are different from me,“ she said. “When you work the crisis line, you never know who you’re going to have on the other end of the phone. It has opened me up to a level of empathy that I don’t think I would have had if I hadn’t listened to those people.” For students interested in a nonprofit career, Sanders suggests that they follow their passion while choosing a major and consider adding the in the works nonprofit minor as a basis for connecting with an organization. He also recommends that an emphasis be put on experience. Sanders said he is hoping to make a service learning internship required for the minor, giving students first-hand interaction with nonprofits and helping them to build a network in the sector. Professors from across campus will soon be meeting to discuss which disciplines might be interested in participating in the new minor. Although it is still a work in progress, Montevallo students can look forward to the upcoming minor and the opportunities that come with it.

Alpha Delta Pi remakes “Whose Line” for charity BY JORDAN WALES

For the second time this year, the Greek community packed out LeBaron Hall. This time the occasion was Alpha Delta Pi’s remake of the popular improv comedy show “Whose Line is it Anyway?” But in this version, the points did matter and a winner was named. Organizations had been gearing up for the event weeks before, collecting pop tabs for extra points. The night before, Alpha Delta Pi held a fundraiser at the Calera Zaxby’s to see which group could get the most receipts from purchases. People carpooled and chowed down on chicken fingers and birthday cake milkshakes in support of ADPi’s philanthropy, Ronald McDonald House Charities. There were a total of five games, all reminiscent of the event’s famous cousin. The “Prop Game,” taken directly from the show, featured a pair of contestants from each sorority and fraternity who were given a

random item and made to come up with as many uses as possible for it (other than its original). During the “Question Game,” contestants conversed in only questions. Sororities and fraternities competed directly against each other although a winner from each was crowned. There were no microphones attached to contestants, so many were forced to project. It turned out not to be a problem. With each joke from students we didn’t previously realize were so clever, the audience would roar in laughter and then immediately die down in an act of selfdiscipline and anticipation to hear the next one. It was a relaxed, laidback event to achieve laughs and help families struggling with illness. In the end, Alpha Gamma Delta and Alpha Tau Omega took the grand prize home, with Chi Omega and Lambda Chi Alpha coming in first for pop tabs, and Chi

O and ATO in receipts. Camille Weeks, ADPi’s philanthropy chair, was excited to do the event again. Weeks said that the show was once done several years ago and that they brought it back to see how it would go over now. She said that if it worked out and the campus feedback was positive, they may consider bringing the event back permanently as one of their annual fundraisers. It did what it needed to — it raised funds. Weeks said that they made $400 off of Zaxby’s and $300 cash off ticket sales After totaling all of the numbers, ADPi ended up raising $1100 for the Ronald McDonald house. Add that with the fact that it was almost completely free to put on, and you have a successful philanthropy event. For more information on the Ronald McDonald House Charities and its many programs, visit

Faculty Advisor: Dr. Stoops, VP: Melanie Berry, Treasurer: Shannon Skelton, Pres: Claire Ezekiel

First French club crêpe sale is a huge success


Members of the French Club smiled at curious customers behind their red and blue table while quickly grabbing at different fruits and fillings, asking the customer if they’d also like toast, a crescent or a “boisson” --a drink. These customers were eventually treated to two warm golden-brown crêpes topped with sugar beside a crisp buttered crescent roll. The crêpe sale was held March 19 - 20. Prior to the sale, 200 crêpes total had been prepared for both days, but by 1 p.m. on the first day, the French club had sold every last one. French Club president Claire Ezekiel said, “We hoped that we would be successful, but we had no idea how popular the sale would be.” This unforeseen success had them pressed to restock their supplies and cook another batch of crêpes that night for the next day. The French crêpe is a very thin pancake made from wheat flour that is widely consumed across Europe. Crêpes are eaten with a variety of fillings and the French Club offered a few favorites such as Nutella, strawberries, sliced almonds, caramel and jams. Ezekiel said her favorite filling combination was called “citron,”a crêpe with a spread

of butter sprinkled with sugar and the juice from a freshly squeezed lemon. The French club is relatively new on campus — only becoming officially recognized around the beginning of October last year. This is their first big event, and the members wanted to use it to establish themselves as a true part of campus. The goal of the French Club is to not only gain members interested in the French language but also appeal to those simply wishing to learn about a culture other than their own. When asked why crêpes were the chosen cuisine for their sale, Ezekiel said, “Crêpes are so iconically French. We wanted to present something unique and expose people who have never had crêpes to a little bit of French culture.” It was estimated that around 400 crêpes were sold in those two days with a total of over $200 earned. The money went into the French Club fund that will be used for their next event: Tour de France at Orr Park on April 27. French Club members will be riding bikes around the park and someone will commit to donate a certain amount for every lap completed to fundraise the summer study abroad trip to Paris.

Mayhem Poets aim to change perspective on poetry events BY KAYLA MCLAUGHLIN

The Mayhem Poets are three men on a mission to change everyone’s mind about what coming to a poetry event means. This event didn’t involve anyone trying too hard to keep people awake or saying a word no one understood. The night of March 19 the University of Montevallo got slammed with a love of words, rhythm and utter fun. The three unforgettable poets on stage at Palmer Hall had just flown into Birmingham that morning. They tour like musicians, and they’re used to walking out on stage to a house that’s packed full or close to it. They walked out onto Palmer’s stage enthused as ever but with a crowd of maybe 20 students. For those who weren’t there, it may be assumed that this meant the show was poor, but instead it was personal, real, intimate and involved like possibly no other show has been for them or their audience. The Mayhem Poets consists of Mason, Scottt with 3 t’s (Scott with two t’s when he’s offstage) and MC or Mikumari Caiyhe. All three used hip-hop and rhythm to inspire their audience with powerful ideas. The theme of most of Mason’s poems would have made UM’s Environmental Club proud. He talked about what society is doing to harm the environment without pointing fingers or making audience members uncomfortable. Instead, he used verse and rhyme to express how he hoped the Earth would still be a place where his little girl and her children years from now could live. Scottt’s poetry was blunt and allowed him to reveal every physical and emotional flaw about himself with-

out feeling embarrassed. The final line of one of his poems was “Now you know me,” and the audience really felt like they did. After the show, he mentioned that his stage persona gave him the strength to tell all — even his feelings about his bipolar disorder. MC was the entertainer of the night, however. The audience laughed until they couldn’t breathe when he came on stage. His poems were creative, dynamic and he involved audience members in his work. For one poem he asked for two volunteers and had them each say only one syllable when he pointed at them — having them become like cogs in his machine as he rapped out the verses with their help. Even though MC was the funniest of the group, he also had the power to touch people’s souls as with his poem “Sunshine,” which was written because he wanted people to see past his mother’s addiction and present her as beautiful. The final act was done by all three poets in which Mason stood on stage and preached about the wonderful teachings of Dr. Seuss while Thing One and Thing Two (Scottt and MC) shouted back at him from the audience like they were part of a real congregation. The laughter didn’t stop until all three were back on stage again saying thank you and goodnight.




She, he, they: Spectrum’s preferred pronouns


UM students learn how to lend a hand


The time to make a difference has never been so easy with events like University of Montevallo’s service fair. The service fair happened on March 18 in Anna Irvin where 14 organizations shared volunteer opportunities with all students who attended the event and curiously stopped at their tables. Sophomore Jennifer Payne said, “I really enjoyed the service learning fair.” Payne thought the fair beneficial to her Child and Family Studies major. She said, “I was able to learn about some local agencies where I might complete my internship during my senior year.” Not many students attended the event but the ones who did inquisitively viewed many of the

tables. The choices were varied and vast with organizations like: Alacare Home Health and Hospice, City of Montevallo, Owen’s House, Yellow Dot Program, Shelby County Historical Society and St. Andrews Episcopal Church Clothing Ministry. “I visited the table for Owen’s house and learned about services they provide for abused children in Shelby County,” said Payne. She also visited the Falcon Scholars table and found out that they work with Owens House as well. Payne said, “I am definitely interested in participating.” There is a chance to volunteer in just about anything. The choices go from building ramps for the disabled with Disability Rights and Resources

to making baskets and friends with the elderly by joining Alacare Home Health and Hospice. There is a chance to work with kids by joining Boys and Girls Club, Owens’ house or helping maintain a bike trail with the city of Montevallo. The city also needs volunteers to help with their fundraisers and prepping of middle school students for Montevallo’s sister city, Echizen, Japan. There is a “cultural student exchange every year and it’s paid for by the fundraisers and donations,” said Cindy Holsombeck, assistant to the mayor. The chances are numerous and available for anyone willing to help. The Office of Service Learning and Community Engagement can help to find an opportunity for anyone interested. Many of the organizations listed are also a part of UM’s Falcon Scholars in Action program. Payne stated, “I have enjoyed volunteering since high school. I am glad that UM held this event because I was able to learn about agencies I didn’t know existed before.”

A forum set up to educate university students and faculty on the proper usage of pronouns based on gender identity and expression was hosted by the university’s gender/sexuality alliance, Spectrum, on March 12. Frank Curtis, Spectrum’s education chair, said the forum was set up to, “foster an attitude of acceptance on campus for all individuals.” Curtis began explaining the differences between sex and gender and how there are five characteristics to define sex and how few people fit all five. He said that gender was different from sex and the idea they are the same or dependent upon each other is an incorrect way of thinking. He explained that sex is the scientific base of an individual’s anatomy and the pronoun they were assigned at birth, either he or she. Gender, he said,

is a societal construct. “Western society has gender codes that adhere to binary set of rules,” Curtis said. “The binary referring to thought of two genders.” He said that gender identity is the way that people feel at their most basic level, man, woman, etc. That is expressed through gender expression and the way an individual acts on their gender identity. Many factors can express an individual’s gender, Curtis said. The manner of dress, gestures and actions, speech patterns, body language, hygienic routines and dietary habits. He said there is no wrong way of expressing gender. “Society explains how someone should express gender through societal norms,” Curtis said. “You shouldn’t wear dresses as a guy. If you’re a woman you should shave your legs. This attitude has to change.” He believes that change

will come when people are educated and begin using the preferred pronouns of people around them. “Everyone has a pronoun preference and that should be observed and respected,” he said. “You can do whatever you want and respect others’ decisions to do the same.” Curtis then addressed how to appropriately ask and identify the preferred pronouns of individuals. He said the easiest way is to simply ask in a respectful manner. He warned, however, that “curiosity does not equal entitlement” and to be respectful when approaching the topic. For more information on pronoun usage, email Curtis at lcurtis@ or visit the Spectrum Facebook page. For a list of gender identities and pronouns visit

Photos by Umar Nadir Though the ES minor is available under the department of Biology, Chemistry and Mathematics, it can easily be paired with several other majors on campus.

Water is life: Students meet with Alabama Rivers Alliance to raise awareness BY UMAR NADIR

A group of Environmental Club students from the University of Montevallo learned about water policy and other environmental issues at the 2014 Alabama Water Rally on March 8 in Montgomery. The conference was sponsored by the Alabama Rivers Alliance. Overall, the Water Rally was a clinic on environmental concerns that cannot be ignored. Competing interests were identified and speakers emphasized that Alabamians need to be vigilant and coordinate efforts to secure good health and the future of the state’s water supply. Ultimately, the importance of the Water Rally was to share information. “Students are a great resource…Students who want to make a difference and who are in school learning how to make an impact are all honored,” said Adam Johnston of Alabama Rivers Alliance during the Annual Rivers Awards Celebration Banquet. Morgan Pennington of Madison, Ala., a senior at Bob Jones High School and freshman-to-be at the University of Montevallo, attended the conference. She said, “I think that this experience to learn about river conservation has been a very motivational and enlightening experience. It has

helped show me that people do have power. We must take action to protect this vital resource and we can.” The conference had 20 guest speakers, 18 sponsors and 115 attendees. Of those, two were biology majors from the University of Montevallo. Other UM students included those majoring in math, kinesiology, mass communication and English. On Saturday, lawyer and West Point graduate Mitch Reid of Slocomb opened the conference town hall style with an overview on water policy followed by break-out sessions. Reid pointed out that the Alabama Department of Environmental Management can issue penalties when regulating the water supply and environmental issues, but the payment for those penalties goes to the general fund for the state rather than to the department. He said that the current system of companies self-regulating and self-reporting is an ineffective way to ensure standards of conduct. With the slogan “Water is Life,” the Alabama Rivers Alliance is working to create awareness and change in the area of water efficiency and conservation. “We need public hearings before bills are pushed and passed,” Reid said.

12tH AnNuAl

MoNtEvAlLo LiTeRaRy FeStIvAl FrIdAy, ApRiL 11, 2014 cArMiChAeL lIbRaRy nOoN tO sIx



University of Montevallo opera to present “The Mikado” COURTESY OF UNIVERSITY RELATIONS


Greek Week signs vandalized The Greek Week signs displayed on Flower Hill were found vandalized the morning of April 2. Cedric Norman, assistant director of student life, said the UMPD was notified but Student Life did not file a report.

The University of Montevallo department of music, with the help of a generous gift from Merrill Lynch & Co. Inc., will present Gilbert and Sullivan’s comic opera, The Mikado, April 24-27 in Palmer Auditorium on the UM campus. The cast, directed by Charles Wood, associate professor of music at UM, will feature student singers, several of whom have won awards in national opera competitions. The production will feature an orchestra composed of musicians from among Montevallo’s music faculty and students, as well as from the Tuscaloosa Symphony and other area musicians. “We are thrilled to have the generous support of Merrill Lynch as we prepare for the University of Montevallo’s upcoming production of The Mikado,” noted Dr. Alan Goldspiel,

chair of UM’s Department of Music. “Partnerships such as this allow us to offer our students unparalleled performance experiences that enhance their learning opportunities and allow them to prepare to take their talents to the next level. They also provide outstanding options for members of the community and surrounding area to enjoy arts events that are both affordable and close to home. We are truly appreciative of Merrill Lynch’s investment in the arts and look forward to a continued relationship with them as we work to expand the arts throughout Shelby County,” stated Goldspiel. One of the world’s most frequently played musical theatre pieces, The Mikado is set in Japan and satirizes British politics and institutions in play in the late 19th century, the

period during which the opera was written. The comedy deals with themes of death as trivial, lighthearted issues, a technique called meiosis, a drastic understatement of a situation. A feature of the production that is “personalized” for each company’s performance is the “Little List” of people in the fictional town of Titipu who would not be missed, should they be beheaded. In many instances, local celebrities and dignitaries vie for a place on the list, which is read during the performance. Performance times are 7:30 p.m. Thursday, April 24-Saturday, April 26, with a 2 p.m. matinee on Sunday, April 27. Ticket prices are $15 for adults and $8 for students and senior citizens. General seating. For ticket information, contact the UM Music Department at 205-665-6670.

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Left: Newly elected sophomore senator Kadejia Cheatom smiles for her victory after the election. Right: Current SGA president Rachael Swokowski and future president Tanya Hoang pose together after the results are announced. SGA senators were also announced. Adulting returning senator will be Emily Pennington, commuter senator is Ryan Baker. and minority senator is Zoyla Pinacho. Arts and science department senators are Davonte Chamblin, Rebecca Hendrix, Morgan Heumann, Daniel Kenders and Racheal Ward. Those elected as education senators are Amie Ballenger, Jose Hilario and Kailan Parker. The two fine arts senators will be Courtney Boyd and Sydney Fant. Sophomore class senators are Kadejia Cheatom, Anna Dennis and Marc Tucci. Senators for the junior class are Corey

Johnson, Layla Khan and Taylor Teems. Finally, the 2014 senior senators are Sara Clink, Savanna Gun and Alyse Hartdegen. During the SGA debate on March 17, Hoang promised students that she would be an advocate for the student body and use their feedback to promote change. She said her time on SGA and as UPC coordinator has taught her much about how to manage her time, and promised to make needed adjustments for next year. Though Hoang has always been very active on Purple side, she said being a Green president will allow her to contribute to the whole student population

instead of just a portion. During the debate, junior Andrea Dillingham asked all of the candidates what their theme song for the next two semesters would be. Hoang’s answer? “Circle of Life” from the “Lion King.” When asked how she felt about the election results, current SGA president Rachael Swokowksi had high hopes for the next year. “With two years of being UPC president, I’ve done a great job facilitating teamwork. I plan to use those same skills to empower people to instill change.” Hoang said confidently during the debate.




Keep spring in your step, not your sinuses BY BRITNEY WILLIAMS


“Divergent” soars in box offices


Teen fiction novels have been a major focus for film creators within the past eight years. The teen flick phenomena began in 2008 with the ever popular and sparkly “Twilight Saga,” based on the book series by Stephenie Meyer. Then it progressed to the still continuing and intense “Hunger Games” films, based on the trilogy written by Suzanne Collins. The newest teen fiction saga, “Divergent,” is second in box offices with over 26 million dollars in ticket sales on This film is based on a trilogy written by Veronica Roth. The film takes place in a futuristic utopian society where a wall has been built around the crumbling city of Chicago to protect the citizens from the unknown. The leaders of this community have created a system of five factions, or groups. Each individual is divided in the factions by their own “choice” as to where they would fit in best and serve the community fully.

As with any “flawless” utopian system, there is moral corruption within the execution of keeping the peace. The heroine Tris, played by Shailene Woodley, uncovers the truth and stands up to fight the system and ultimately survives the destruction of all that she has known. Woodley has come a long way from her role in the 2008 disastrous series, “Secret Life of the American Teenager.” In “Divergent” she still has the sense of being a teenager, but it is apparent that she has grown and matured. While Woodley’s acting has improved, she still has a lot of work to do. She overplayed the more emotionally dramatic roles, which shows she is still struggling to grasp the concept of portraying realistic characters. Tris’ love interest, Four, is played by Theo James. James is a stereotypical male lead. He is muscular, dominant and sensitive. His character has a complicated past and has many fears of what

is to come, but he allows himself to break away and fall in love. James’ portrayal of Four feels natural, but the audience almost loses this with overzealous corny lines within the script. This includes the always generic “I have never trusted someone before.” The male lead is assigned the sweetest and most heart wrenching lines in the script, but the most important lines need to be rewritten. Corny is the buzzword of all teen movies, but this film had the opportunity to get past that and be a good serious film; however, the creators of this film didn’t take that to heart. Overall, the movie is decent and achieves the goal of entertainment. The content is interesting and the characters are relatable. Is this film worth the 10 dollar ticket? It is if you are a fan of the book or enjoy teen fiction films. The Alabamian gives this film a 6/10.

Spring is here; that means allergy season is too. Many of us get tired of itchy, watery eyes and sneezing from pollen in the air. There are several ways to stay healthy and avoid these issues. Those who suffer from allergies should take over-the-counter meds like Claritin, Zyrtec or something generic that contains an antihistamine. The antihistamine will help control the usual allergy symptoms. Avoid being outside for long periods of time, especially during high pollen days. If you are suffering from congestion, Sudafed or something similar should take care of that. Another thing you may also want to try is a saline spray to keep moisture in your nose if it becomes dry. Itchy, watery eyes and a runny nose are not the only symptoms of allergies. Wheezing and coughing are too. For those with asthma be sure to follow the doctor’s orders. According to the website Web MD those of you who are not sure if you have allergies, contact your local physician to get an allergy test to find out what needs to be done. For those self conscious about runny noses and watery eyes, blow your nose in the restroom.

Only blow your nose in the restroom or in the privacy of your room as a common courtesy. For those who suffer from watery eyes, it is recommend to dab them with tissue from time to time. I do not recommend you rub your eyes as they could become infected by germy hands. Always wipe your eyes with tissue and find an overthe-counter allergy medicine that helps watery eyes and a runny nose. Another method you can try is to avoid the triggers. According to Web MD the first thing you should do is take your allergy medicine a week early so it will be in your system before allergy season gets worse. If you have to go outside try to cover your nose with a tissue and wear sunglasses to protect yourself from the pollen. Just because you do not see it, does not mean it is not there. Some of the best and cheapest generic allergy medicines are Pseudoephedrine (Sudafed) to help stop the congestion and drain the mucus. Cetirizine (Zyrtec) for itchy, watery eyes, runny nose, sneezing and it lasts for 24 hours. Loratadine (Claritin) also helps with these symptoms.

Calendar of Events on campus Thursday, April 3 Greek Week Registration for May, summer & fall semesters, currently enrolled seniors, 8 a.m., forUM Puzzle Party, 5 p.m., Carmichael Library, first floor Montevallo Organization of Gaming (MOG), 7:30 p.m., Hill House Friday, April 4 Registration for May, summer & fall semesters, currently enrolled juniors and above, 8 a.m., forUM Greek Week Talent Show, 7 p.m., McChesney Student Activity Center (SAC), arena Spectrum Rave 2014: Shine bright like a rhinestone!, 8 p.m.–12 a.m., John W. Stewart Student Retreat Saturday, April 5 Tour de Cure, presented by the American Diabetes Association, 7 a.m. The Big Event, 8 a.m.–12 p.m., Myrick Gym Shuttles to Alabaster, 12–6 p.m., meet at “Becoming” sculpture Monday, April 7 Freedom Week Phi Mu’s The Miracle Mile kickoff party, 5 p.m., Flowerhill Sloth:Zumba, 5:30 p.m., Bibb Graves Dance Room Tuesday, April 8 Registration for May, summer & fall semesters, currently enrolled sophomores and above, 8 a.m., forUM Blood Drive, 11 a.m.–12 p.m., Farmer Hall Meeting Room Presidents and Advisors Banquet, 6 p.m., Anna Irvin Wednesday, April 9 Blood Drive, 11 a.m.–12 p.m., Farmer Hall Meeting Room Housing Luau, 4:30–6:30 p.m., Main Quad

Thursday, April 10 Registration for May, summer & fall semesters, currently enrolled undergraduate students, 8 a.m., forUM Watermelon Bust, 3–5 p.m., King Quad Gluttony: Weiner Roast, 5–7 p.m., Main Quad Saturday, April 12 COPLAC Regional Undergraduate Research meeting Movie, 7–9 p.m., Student Life Center, Farmer Hall Sunday, April 13 Empowerment Dinner, 1–6 p.m., Student Retreat Greed: A Pretty Show, 7–8 p.m., Anna Irvin Greed: Meet and Greet, 8:30 p.m., Montevallo Room Monday, April 14 Course evaluation period begins

Saturday, April 5 Deputy 5, 10 p.m.–2 a.m., Main St. Tavern, $10 cover, $8 with student ID Wednesday, April 9 Wine Tasting, 6 p.m., Eclipse Comedie of Errors, 7:30–8:30 p.m. Thursday, April 10 Comedie of Errors, 7:30–8:30 p.m. University Chorus, 7:30–8:30 p.m., LeBaron Recital Hall Friday, April 11 Poetry Slam, Eclipse Montevallo Literary Festival, 12–6 p.m., Carmichael Library Bomber Night, 5 p.m., Eclipse Comedie of Errors, 7:30–8:30 p.m. Saturday, April 12 Montevallo Arts Festival, 10 a.m.–5 p.m, Orr Park Comedie of Errors, 7:30–8:30 p.m. Bobby Legg, acoustic, 10 p.m.–2 a.m., Main St. Tavern, no cover

Tuesday, April 15 Spread-a-Little-Love, 11 a.m.–12 p.m., Sunday, April 13 Anna Irvin Comedie of Errors, 2–3 p.m., 7:30– Falcon Fest feat. The X Change, 4–6 8:30 p.m. p.m., Main Quad Montevallo Organization of Gaming SPORTS (MOG), 7:30 p.m., Hill House Saturday, April 5 Wednesday, April 16 Baseball vs. Francis Marion, 1 p.m., Kermit A. Johnson Field SGA Banquet, 6–8 p.m., Student Women’s tennis vs. Clayton State, 2 Retreat p.m., tennis courts

ArtS & entertainment Daily BFA Exhibitions, 10 a.m.–4 p.m., Monday – Thursday, the Gallery in Bloch Hall Thursday, April 3 Chamber Ensemble, 3:30 p.m., LeBaron Recital Hall Sterner and Beard, 8 p.m., Eclipse Coffee & Books Friday, April 4 Ranch Ghost//Majestico, 10 p.m., Eclipse

Sunday, April 6 Women’s tennis vs. Delta State, 11 a.m., tennis courts Baseball vs. Francis Marion, 12 p.m., baseball field Tuesday, April 8 Women’s tennis vs. West Alabama, 2 p.m., tennis courts Baseball vs. Stillman, 6 p.m., baseball field Wednesday, April 16 Baseball vs. North Alabama, 6 p.m., baseball field

Local Saturday, April 5 VITA (tax assistance), 2–8 p.m., Parnell Memorial Library Tuesday, April 8 VITA (tax assistance), 10 a.m.–1 p.m., Parnell Memorial Library Thursday, April 10 ESOL class, 5:45–7:45 p.m., Parnell Memorial Library Saturday, April 12 VITA (tax assistance), 2–8 p.m., Parnell Memorial Library Tuesday, April 15 VITA (tax assistance), 10 a.m.–1 p.m., Parnell Memorial Library

Ongoing Mondays Alabamian meeting, 5 p.m., Student Publications office Spectrum, 7:30 p.m., Farmer Hall Meeting Room, top floor Anime club, 8:30 p.m. Tuesdays French Club, 12:30–1 p.m., Comer 103 Amnesty International, 5:30 p.m., Comer 307 Resonate worship, 8 p.m., BCM Wednesdays BCM Café Escape, 11 a.m., BCM SGA Senate meeting, 4:30 – 5:30 p.m., Morgan 203 Catholic Campus Ministries weekly mass, 5:30 p.m., CCM student center (two blocks off campus on Highland St.) Ecclesia College Ministry, 7 p.m., Comer Auditorium or Student Retreat (TBD) Student Art Association, 8 p.m., Bloch 202 Whovian Society, 8 p.m., Comer 205 Thursdays Writers’s Club meeting, 8 p.m., Morgan 101

Is something missing? Email with the details of your event to have it included on the next Alabamian calendar.



College cuisine:

Cherry chocolate oatmeal BY COREY JOHNSON

Is there anything better than chocolate? Yes — having chocolate for breakfast! Of course it’s not healthy to grab a candy bar and call it breakfast, but chocolate in moderation is fine. It gives you a nice energy boost. Total prep time: 2 minutes. Ingredients: “Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey” is a flashy, accessible science lesson for the masses.

Neil deGrasse Tyson makes science cool in “Cosmos” reboot

• 1 cup whole grain oatmeal prepared in water or milk • 1/4 diced/dried cherries • 1/2 tbsp cocoa powder • 1 packet Truvia/sweetener • 1 tbsp chocolate chips • 1 tbsp walnuts


Thirty-four years ago, famed astronomer, astrophysicist and science evangelist Carl Sagan took viewers across the globe on a journey through space and time with the television series “Cosmos: A Personal Voyage.” The series educated a curious public about the surrounding universe in a way that managed to be poetic, visceral and philosophical all at the same time and was at one time the most watched series in the history of American public television. Now, Neil deGrasse Tyson, esteemed astrophysicist and educator, takes the reigns and seeks to teach a new generation in “Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey.” “A Spacetime Odyssey” opens with Tyson standing upon the same cliff in Northern California where his predecessor and mentor Carl Sagan launched the original “Cosmos” in 1980. “It’s time to get going again,” he says, as he whisks the viewer

away on his “ship of the imagination.” This literal and figurative vessel is akin the the one Sagan explored the universe in a generation ago, albeit better animated. Soaring from Earth, Tyson begins by giving the viewer a sense of humanity’s place in the universe. As he travels further from earth, he waxes poetic about Earth’s neighborhood, its “cosmic address.” Viewing humanity’s home from further and further away creates a sense of smallness, reminding viewers of the sheer immensity of the cosmos. “Cosmos” then shifts gears, painting a history of humanity’s ambling toward the truth of a massive, expansive universe of which Earth is only a tiny cell. This storybook-style illustrated lesson shows that, above all else, “Cosmos” is about the universe in relation to the humans observing it. As Carl Sagan once said, “We are a way for the cosmos to know itself.”

All of this human history, as Tyson points out, takes place in the last moments of the last day on a great cosmic calendar. This visualization begins with Jan. 1 — the Big Bang, complete with a vibrant and expensive explosion — and ends on Dec. 31, in which the final moments encompass everything any human has ever experienced. “Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey” walks the line between education and inspiration. A high special effects budget and an epic musical score keep things flashy and exciting, while the poetic narrative creates a story for viewers to follow as they ride along with Tyson in his shiny imagination ship. While astronomy experts and enthusiasts are unlikely to find revolutionary or advanced-level learning here, “Cosmos” provides a way for the everyday human to know the surrounding universe and invites a new generation to get scientific.

Instructions: 1. Mix cocoa powder into a bowl with oatmeal base. 2. Mix in cherries. 3. Mix in packet of Truvia (or the sweetener of your choice). 4. Top with extra cherries, chocolate chips and walnuts. 5. Enjoy with a glass of warm milk.


HoneyBaked deliciousness BY KERI HIGGINBOTHAM

My fiance, my son and I went to HoneyBaked Ham in Alabaster for the first time. My fiance is extremely picky about what food he eats, and, since HoneyBaked Ham makes sandwiches, I figured it would be safe enough to try. He is the type of person who will go to Subway and order a turkey and American cheese sandwich with just mayonnaise on white bread. Just about everything he eats has to be as plain as possible. It seems like anything with a good flavor he wants nothing to do with. When we walked in we were the only customers, which was nice since it is a smaller restaurant. The store is stocked with their signature sauces, recipes for soup, cakes, pies and, of course, a refrigerator with hams and turkeys available by the pound. They also advertise that they cater and you can order box lunches and platters. The staff was prompt, helpful and nice. One of the employees also has children so she talked to us about our son and how she remembers being pregnant. I actually liked our conversation and it turned our lunch into a light and free time. I looked over the ​ menu and saw the Ham and Turkey Bella. It came with their special honey glazed ham, smoked turkey, provolone cheese, banana peppers, lettuce and balsamic vinaigrette on cibatta bread. They

asked if I wanted it toasted, and I thought sure — I like a nice toasted sandwich. This was the best decision I made for the sandwich. The first bite was exquisite. The bread was crunchy while the sweet and tangy banana peppers set off the sweetness of the meats. The lettuce gave a nice crisp crunch sound as I bit into it, as the balsamic

and I was fully satisfied. ​My fiance, being such a picky eater, ordered a ham and Swiss cheese sandwich with their signature smoked honey mustard and mayonnaise on a croissant roll, but he did not want his sandwich toasted. Since this was the first time he visited, I was interested in whether or not he enjoyed his lunch. He liked

The store is stocked with their signature sauces, recipes for soup, cakes, pies and, of course, a refrigerator with hams and turkeys available by the pound. vinaigrette started dripping out of the sandwich. Needless to say, I was in heaven. I chose their loaded baked potato salad as my side. I could tell that the potatoes were fresh because of the potato skin in the salad. It was very creamy, aside from the chunks of potato. There was also a hint of onion and sour cream mixed in with chunks of bacon. I found this to be pretty good, but I am not a huge fan of onions so I only ate a few bites to test it out. To wash this all down I had a can of nice, cold Coca Cola. It was a fantastic lunch

it and was full before he finished his sandwich. ​O ur lunch that day was spectacular, and we even went back a week later. The same thing happened. We sat down and the employee talked with us about her children. That is what I love, the consistency of wonderful customer service. Our new regular lunch spot is now HoneyBaked Ham. The Alabamian gives HoneyBaked Ham five feathers out of five.

Vol. 88, Issue 10  

The Alabamian, University of Montevallo

Vol. 88, Issue 10  

The Alabamian, University of Montevallo