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u n i v e r s i t y o f e s s e x ' s s t u d e n t n e w s pap e r | Friday


9th November 2012 | Issue 135


Student News



Students win Prestigious Scholarship

Boobs Are Not News

We Need a Pop Art Revival

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Page 8

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Student Media opening up new opportunities for students across campus


Words from the Editor

Safety is an issue which concerns many. We have all had to consider it at some point; whether it be for ourselves, friends, family or loved ones. During the past few weeks there have been a number of incidents involving students on and off of campus. This has been

Student Seriously Attacked in Square One Words by Jatinder Kalsi and Greg Bailey A 18-year-old female student received severe injuries caused by having her arm “slashed with a piece of glass.” She was taken to Broomfield Hospital in Chelmsford where she was treated by plastic surgery specialists.

a busy time for those who have made our safety their profession.

Humans can be unpredictable and sometimes we cannot avoid the situations we find ourselves in. Though there are ways of minimising the chance of something happening to us. In the article Security on Campus of the security team attempted to control the situation. The fighting gradually moved towards the edge of campus with the resulting serious injury sustained on Square One. A 23-year-old man has been arrested on suspicion of grievous bodily harm with intent and has been issued police bail until Friday November 30, pending further enquiries. Students on campus have shown concern regarding the recent incident:

On Wednesday 24 October, police officers and paramedics were called to University of Essex, Colchester campus. The incident took place shortly after 3.30am following a reported fight at Level 2. The conflict spilled out into the Squares where members

Klaudia Mehmeti, 20, a third year student said: “this is the first time in my two years at [this] University that I have heard about a serious incident on campus, it is worrying but Essex is normally a safe place.”

New Language Course Forced to Reject Applications

Languages to choose from include; Arabic, Chinese, Spanish and many more. The course was started in response to the view multilingual graduates are in decline and therefore have become more desirable.

Words by Greg Bailey

Studies have shown that those who take on a second language: improve the literacy skills of their mother tongue; generally perform better academically and can offset Parkinson’s disease by up to three years. Speaking multiple languages can also provide opportunities for those wishing to work abroad and can also be culturally enlightening.

A new language course has been overrun with huge volume of signups. The course, run by Languages for All (LfA), was in more demand than anyone could have anticipated which lead to the application process being cut short. New members of permanent and temporary staff had to be taken on just to cope with the volume of emails and queries. Qualified teachers were also recruited so additional classes could be held. Even though these measures were taken and several hundred students were given places many applications had to be turned away. The high demand of this pioneering course is evidence this is something the students of Essex highly desire. LfA offers students at the University of Essex the chance to learn a new language alongside their degree course. Three different learning options were made available; framework (daytime), express (evening) and portfolio (own time). These options were set up to have as little impact on the student’s degrees as possible.

As this is the first year of LfA feedback will be very important into how this course evolves. For those who did not gain a place you will be able to apply again during the start of next year. For more information please visit study/languagesforall/.


(2nd Issue) there is a number of ways to keep safe in and around campus. The resounding correlation between all of the tips explored in this article is to be vigilant of your surroundings, for yourself and those around you. Another theme that stands out is that of avoiding bad habits which could put you at risk: do not walk around on your own late at night

in areas which are badly lit or have no CCTV; do not forget to lock and close ground floor windows and doors before going out; do not have your valuables on display either on your person or in your home; and do not separate yourself from your group, there is safety in numbers.

Mahrukh Ahmed, 20, a third year student said “I saw Square One cornered off on Thursday it was worrying to know that something serious took place on campus, but I feel safe as there is a lot of security here.”

the Students’ Union give the highest priority to student welfare and safety, and serious incidents are rare at the University. We are working closely with Essex Police to support their investigation into the incident.”

It is thought that many individuals who do not attend the University of Essex travelled long distances to see Sneakbo, a grime artist, who perform live that night. This comes a year after he himself avoided jail for threatening the lives of a mother and her seven-year-old child.

The University of Essex provides

Campus is normally a very safe place due to the round-the-

clock efforts of campus staff and security. They go to great lengths to make sure we can have fun and enjoy ourselves and by taking a few easy precautions we can avoid a something that could seriously affect our time at Essex. Work hard, have fun and be safe.

24 hour security on site and Student Support can provide help to anyone affected by the incident. If anyone has any information in connection with the incident they should contact investigating officers at Colchester police station on 101.

A 19-year-old man from Colchester was also taken to the local hospital by paramedics after suffering a number of cuts and bruises to his face during an assault in a toilet. The University has issued a statement regarding the incident stating that “The University and

Students win Prestigious Scholarship Words by Jatinder Kalsi Three students from Essex and Cambridgeshire have each been awarded a £3,000 scholarship from the Savoy Educational Trust. They begin their studies at the pioneering Edge Hotel School, the UK’s first hotel school based entirely in a fully operational commercial hotel. Gemma Storey, 18, and Fatmata Bangura, 36, from Colchester are both working towards a Foundation degree in Hotel Management. While Emma Sutton, 19, from Burwell in Cambridgeshire is working towards a Bachelors degree (BA) in Hotel Management. All three scholarship recipients started their courses in September at the Edge Hotel School, situated on the University of Essex’s Colchester Campus. Their degree courses will combine academic study with practical experience of working in the newly refurbished Wivenhoe House hotel. Scholarship recipient Gemma Storey said: “I’m excited about the opportunities I’ll have at the Edge Hotel School to learn about different types of hotel environments because many of the

hotel rooms at Wivenhoe House are individually designed and furnished by different hoteliers.” The scholarships are designed to support talented students and ‘encourage the outstanding hospitality managers of the future’. Scholarships were awarded by a panel on the basis of the criteria from the application form to the supporting statement the panel took each aspect into consideration. Alan Jenkins, Principal of the Edge Hotel School, said: “With their impressive reputation built over 50 years of developing education, training and qualifications in the hospitality sector, the support of Savoy Educational Trust is

a significant endorsement of our mission based on a model of ‘learning-by-doing’. We are honoured to be working with them.” Students at Edge Hotel School will achieve a degree which will be awarded by University of Essex while working at the historic Wivenhoe House. This luxury hotel and restaurant was recently restored at a cost of £10 million. The curriculum has been developed in collaboration with some of the sector’s leading employers and well-known industry figures including Michelin star chefs and 4 and 5 star hoteliers.

Friday 9th November 2012

The Law Event: 2012

key people in the legal sector. One major employer remarked in their feedback from last year, “A very good fair – we were very busy and pleased with the level of interest in our company. Most students were well prepared and professional in their approach”. The Employability and Careers centre emphasises that this event is open to students from all degree disciplines who are interested in the legal profession.

Words by Jatinder Kalsi The Law Event 2012 is organised by the School of Law and the Employability and Careers Centre, it is a must for anyone considering a legal career. Throughout the day there will be presentations and in the evening a fair with representatives from national and local law firms. There are over 30 organisations taking part in the Law events this year.

Students can prepare themselves for the event by attending ‘How to get the most out of the Law Fair’ presented by Nabarro, on Tuesday 13 November at 5pm to book onto this event visit - careers/events/programme.shtm .

Last year’s Law event proved a huge success with a record number of students from the Law school and other disciplines taking part. President of the Law society Lisa Herring said “the Law fair is an annual event, and is a fantastic opportunity for all students. A few tips would be to do your research, dress appropriately, act confidently and go to the Nabarro talk on the 13th November which gives information on how to conduct yourself and talk to prospective employers. Also if you’re interested in Law, the Law Society organise court trips, workshops and competitions to support all career aspirations”. Kelvin Rutledge & Paul Shadarevian

Essex Students win Unique Art Internship Words by Jatinder Kalsi Four University of Essex students and graduates have had the unique opportunity of helping to prepare a major art exhibition at The Minories Galleries in Colchester.

of Cornerstone Barristers will be running an informal ‘drop in’ style session which will allow you the opportunity to informally speak to senior law practitioners to find out more about all aspects of having a career in law. There is information available regarding CV preparation, the day-to-day role of a barrister, of preparing for an exhibition.” BA History of Art student Zoe Few wants to become a curator, and speaking of the internship said: , “It was good to be involved in the process of putting on an exhibition. We were involved in all sorts of different things from writing label text to choosing art work and deciding where it should be displayed.”

The partnership is between University of Essex’s internship programme and the Minories management team and the VictorBatte Lay Trust. The charitable organisation which owns the galleries allowed the internship programme to be a possibility for students.

Minories manager Lee Pugh said: “We could not have done this exhibition without the interns. They got involved in every aspect

insights into the position and professional and commercial awareness. There is no need to book into any of these events and they are open to students from all degree disciplines. For a schedule of presentations please visit: www.essex. descriptions/autumn2012/ be about. I’ve also created material specifically for teachers bringing schools to the exhibition.” The Minories Art Galleries are a professional contemporary art gallery run by the Colchester School of Art, part of Colchester Institute. The Friends of the Minories and Victor Batte-Lay Trust have ensured the building be used to the benefit of the local arts community. This has continued and now ensures the Colchester School of Art provides contemporary art and design in one Colchester’s most distinctive buildings. Colchester Institute is an academic partner of the University of Essex. All Internships organised by the University of Essex aim to offer students and graduates the opportunity to develop their skills and experience working in a specific field; whilst providing businesses or organisations the chance to benefit from their knowledge, skills and expertise.

William Adcock, Zoe Few, Sheila Madder and Ana Sol Gonzalez worked on preparations for Art for Colchester: The 20th century collecting practices of the Victor Batte-Lay Trust. The exhibition featured work gifted, loaned or bought by the Trust and included pieces by John Constable, Camille Pissarro and Sir Eduardo Paolozzi among many others.


Ana who has just completed her MA in Curating Contemporary Art said “I’ve been able to develop interpretative materials which encourage parents to talk to their children about what the work might

The internship programme is proving successful with many students and graduates having a positive impact on companies and organisations through their internships, and gaining permanent roles after. To find out more about internships visit: internships

laweventexhibitors2012.shtm National and Local Law firms will be at the Law Fair this year, representatives from International Law firm Freshfields and City firm Nabarro to local law firm Palmers are just a few who are attending. This event presents a fantastic opportunity for students to make contacts, learn from and impress

Student Employability and Enterprise Manager, Charlie Wheeldon, explained how students should take this event as the ‘first stage of an interview’ and dress suitable for the event. Charlie also expressed that the key to success at such an event is preparation, be sure to research the firms attending and prepare some questions to get more information. To see details of all the organisations taking part please visit the careers website.



Student House Suffers Break in Words by Macartney

out followed by house-to-house enquiries. In light of the incident Investigating Officer, Dc Andrea Ford, said: “Those who house-share all have shared responsibility in ensuring the property is secure when they leave it or even when they are inside." She urged anyone with information to contact detectives at Colchester police station.


Students are being reminded by local police the importance of locking up their valuables after a student house was burgled in Greenstead on the 31st October.

Recent figures from ukcrimestats. com show that since October 2011 burglary has risen in Colchester Town; 37 burglaries were recorded throughout August and September 2012 alone.

Thieves broke into the property in Tippett Close sometime between 5pm on Wednesday 31 October and 10am the following morning. The incident coincided with the evening of Halloween, which meant many student houses were empty as sell-out events took place on campus in Sub Zero and Level 2.

The recent incident highlights the importance of carrying out regular procedures to help prevent such crimes. These include ensuring all windows and doors are locked before you go out and not keeping your valuables on display.

Thieves crossed a neighbour’s back garden and got in to the house through an open toilet window. Once inside they ransacked bedrooms and stole many valuable items, including a laptop, games console, tv and music player. A forensic examination of the property has been carried

Essex Elects Very First Police and Crime Commissioner Words by Adam Bond

For more information on keeping your possessions safe read our recent interview with Campus Security Manager Paul Humphreys on the blog (rabbitlocalnews.

(Labour); accountant Andrew Smith (UKIP); solicitor and party chairman Robin Tilbrook (English Democrats) and former police officer Mick Twaites (Independent). Proponents say that the new role will ensure standards and good

value for money are upheld within local police authorities, replacing the one bureaucratic system with a new democratic one. PPCs will also decentralise power from London to locally elected officials who can focus better on local issues. Critics argue however that the

On Thursday 15 November, voters across Essex will be heading to polling stations to vote for Police and Crime Commissioner (PCC) for the very first time. The new role is being introduced across 41 districts in England and Wales as part of a wave of new legislation from the government intended to make public services more accountable. Each PCC will be responsible for maintaining budgets and priorities of their local police authority, acting as a representative of the public. Essex will choose between 6 candidates for the role: former Royal Naval officer Nick Alston (Conservative); Parish councillor and ‘Essex Retired Police Dogs Fund’ chair Linda Belgrove (Independent); deputy leader of Thurrock council Val-Morris Cook

Murder in Clacton Words by Macartney

a flat in Clacton on Friday 2nd November.


A murder investigation is underway after the body of an elderly woman, thought to be in her late 60s, was discovered at

Police arrived at the flat on St Vincent Road at 7pm and forced their way in after reports were made concerning a woman's welfare. When officers entered the property they found the body of a woman and pronounced her dead at the

scene. Shortly after the discovery, officers arrested a 37 year-old man from Clacton on suspicion of murder. He was later questioned by detectives at a local police station. A post-mortem examination is due to be carried out. The formal identification of the woman is still to be announced.

introduction of PCCs is a waste of money that could result in the quality of service being affected by political influences. There are also concerns about the legitimacy the elected PCCs will have in anticipation of low turnout figures for the elections. Abigail Marsh, a third-year

International Relations student, says “this election marks a big change up in the way police forces are run. Regardless of your political opinions, it is important to vote for such an important role that will affect everyone’s lives”.

Friday 9th November 2012

A F UT U R E T H AT WO R KS The Students’ Union wants to take students to London and be part of the movement against austerity and to call on Parliament to ‘reverse the cuts’.


S AT U R D AY 2 0 O C TO BER 201 2 On October 20th, over half a million trade unionists, students and unemployed will march through London to defy the notion that cuts are an accepted evil.

Students can buy a £10 ticket for return travel to London from reception or SU officers.



What’s it like to Study Abroad?

Study Abroad is a programme offered by The University of Essex which gives students the chance to complete either a term or a year of their degree course in a foreign country. But what’s it like to study abroad if England is that foreign country?

being able to memorize things without thinking of them.

you and tried to take you the best you can be.

In Spain, degrees last 4 years, and all you do is read huge books and take exams: no essays or debating. You are in classes with 200-500 people and you are just a number to the professor, they do not know your name, or anything about you. I think people with real talent find themselves frustrated because their abilities are not appreciated

When I finished Journalism, I started a Law degree at a public university and it was just frustrating. Studying and thinking are two things I am passionate about, and my dream was to study at a University where I could reach my highest potential. I realized I had to move to the UK, so I spent my summer here trying to reach a good English level, and got into The University of Essex. It was the best decision I've ever made.


What can students do to make the most of studying abroad? I think they have to take full advantage of all the opportunities University life offers: the culture, the societies, the sport, as well as the academic. Simply get involved in university life. If you could change anything about the experience, would you? Talking about my personal experience, and broadly speaking, I wouldn't change anything because I am discovering things I never knew! The societies, day and night life, cultural activities, but the difference being it is all in a university environment. That's simply my dream!

The Rabbit spoke to Andrea Guinea Pavon, about her experience of Studying Abroad, from the other side. Andrea is from Oviedo, Spain, and is doing a BA in Politics at The University of Essex, having completed in 2011 a Journalism course in Spain. How does studying in the UK differ to Spain? It is absolutely different. In my humble opinion, one of the reasons why Spain is going through such economic crisis is because of the education system: it is deficient, and it does not allow you to think. Digging deeper, the Spanish education system is focused on memorising rather than reasoning and I think there is no merit in

Australia Cuts One Billion From Education Words by Eleanor Brimelow

and therefore their potential is never reached. What made you want to study in Spain to begin with, and then in the UK? The English level of Spanish people is strikingly poor: we have all television, books, and films translated. Schools never explain to you the possibility of studying abroad; therefore it is something that almost nobody thinks of when finishing school. I decided to study in Spain because my English was not good enough. I was really lucky because I attended the best Spanish university in Journalism, The University of Navarra, and it was nothing like the public universities; the professors knew

Australian vice-chancellors were shocked on Monday by the federal government’s decision to slash $1 billion from higher education spending over the next five years, predominantly in the field of research.

What is the best part of studying abroad? How you widen your horizons, how you mature, and basically learn how to survive. Nothing’s easy. There is the language obstacle, you don't know anybody, the culture is different, the food is different, the TV is different; nothing is the same. The best part of studying abroad is if you are lucky enough to fit in. For instance, I have always thought that I didn’t fit in when I was in Spain, but now, despite the difficulties, I feel I fit in here and that is a great feeling.

Obama Wins after Dominating the Student Votes Words by Rachel McGrath Exit polls carried out after this week’s USA Presidential Election have identified student and youth votes as vital to the Barack Obama’s re-election. President Barack Obama won the race to the White House with 303 electoral votes compared to Republican candidate Mitt Romney’s 206. As the|Rabbit goes to press, Florida’s results are still pending after a highly close-fought contest between the two candidates. However, the incumbent’s clean sweep of every other swing state means the verdict has been ascertained and victory speech given with this result still pending.

The Study Abroad Office is in room 5S.7.27, where students can find out more information.

As in 2008, the youth and student vote was vital to Obama’s success. Exit polls place the percentage of 18 - 29-year-olds voting for Obama at 60%, compared to the 37% opting for Romney.

As a result, hundreds of jobs are expected to be lost, in particular amongst the “Group of Eight” Universities, which are the most research-intensive. Professor Fred Hilmer, chair of the Group of Eight and Vice-Chancellor of the University of New South Wales, said the cuts would mean the loss of 1,450 research positions.

This was in direct reference to the government’s decision two years ago to providing universities with the freedom to enrol as many students as they wished. This led to a dramatic increase in enrolments placed an unsustainable strain on resources. It cost the government millions more to help institutions meet the costs of the rapidly rising student numbers.

“These cuts to the sustainability of research funding flow from the government’s refusal to face up to the unsustainability of its illconceived demand-driven funding of higher education.”

The federal lobby group, Universities Australia (UA) said the university sector was disappointed that gains recently made in funding the indirect costs

At Pennsylvania State University over 3500 students voted in the Presidential election, with an overwhelming majority of 77% voting Obama. Michael Nutter, Mayor of Pennsylvania’s largest city Philadelphia, sees the student vote as indubitably instrumental in Obama’s victory not just his home state, but also the whole election. “There seemed to be a tremendous amount of enthusiasm by young people and college students all across the city of Philadelphia,” he explains to The Daily Pennsylvanian. “I’m sure that that’s a big part of the President’s win.” Easy accessibility to polling stations encouraged students to have their say in the all-important elections, with some at Penn State turning up to vote on campus in their pyjamas and dressing gowns. In what was largely considered the must-win swing state of Ohio students queued for hours on University campuses to ensure their votes were cast.

of research were being eroded. UA Chief Executive Belinda Robinson said: “Investing in research is a long-term endeavour and any reductions will have long-term consequences.” She also said: “While research grants cover the direct costs of research, they do not meet the many other administrative and infrastructure costs that accompany research. These are very substantial, and universities have fought for years to have them recognised.”

Friday 9th November 2012



Are Modern Blockbuster Books Worthy of High Regard? Words by Leona Kendall

It seems absurd to categorise the likes of ’50 Shades of Grey’ alongside literary classics such as ‘Wuthering Heights’ and any of Shakespeare’s works, but is this really madness? All literature in its day is both criticised and praised, and it is only with time that most literature seems to be considered worthy of appreciation. Take Jane Austen for example. At first her work was considered female drivel; pretty stories with no moral teachings or noteworthy view points. Now, more than a hundred years on, you rarely find someone who is not familiar with one of her novels. In fifty years’ time it would not surprise me if Mr Grey becomes as famous as Heathcliff. We should stop ignoring the present as we tend to



and accept a new novel as a potential for literary notoriety and greatness.

The basic question is whether we receive the same amount of intellectual stimulation from new works as we do from those from the literature canon. The answer may be thought to be apparent, but how can we possibly compare the two forms? If it is the amount we learn from books that makes us value them then ’Fifty Shades of Grey’ should be valued, for it can undeniably teach one a lot; albeit in a slightly different way to the poems of Wordsworth and Byron. So should it not hold the same value, just under a different light? Should our modern day creations not mean just as much to us as those of bygone years? After all, they all get us talking and thinking, and that is the very point of literature. We can learn a lot about past eras through their literature. Maybe it is time to stop ignoring ours and begin appreciating our present literary insights.

Art for Sake


Words by Ed Gove Art is a singularly pointless thing. To spend hours meticulously applying paint to canvas or scraping a figure out of a shapeless lump of marble is needless. It is an utter waste of time. Occasionally an artist will make enough money from their work to live comfortable, but generally they need to have

Boobs Are Not News Words by Becca Johnson Everyone has heard of “Page 3”. The infamous tabloid feature originated in the ‘70s and has since been providing the nation with images of topless women on a daily basis. Recently an online campaign, “No More Page 3” has been gaining media attention. Will this campaign succeed where many have failed before? The Sun, Britain’s most popular newspaper, reaches an estimated

seven million people each day. Seven million people who see women objectified daily, for no reason other than sexual gratification. Considering that The Sun brands itself as a “family paper”, these images enter households and can be easily viewed by children. In this, objectifying women is normalised from a young age. It teaches girls that it is important to be a sex object and teaches boys that it is okay to treat girls as such. In a country where 1 in 4 women have been sexually assaulted, this normalisation is toxic.

outdated and redundant, but also bizarre. It is a NEWSpaper; boobs are not news! It is clear that even The Sun knows how irrelevant this feature is. Look at the frankly ridiculous comments beside these pictures, where the girls present their point of view on current issues.

Despite all the positive contributions of women, they continue to be dehumanised. Page 3 is not only

I am not arguing for censorship, but everything has its place. Boobs do not belong in a national

I am not saying that these girls can’t be intelligent - but a Shakespeare quote should not be used in response to a question about the Essex lion. You know they are trying to over-compensate for something.

some kind of supplementary income - or they will starve. Plus, art is dangerous. Name three famous artists and I bet you that at least two of them are dead probably three. Leonardo da Vinci is dead, Michelangelo is dead, and I cannot remember their names but I’m pretty sure that the other two Ninja Turtles are dead too. Really everyone would be better off just leaving a paintbrush and easel will alone.

no point beyond that, and it is accessible. You do not need to be an artist or an academic with a Doctorate in Art History to appreciate a beautiful painting or sculpture. It requires no justification for its being beyond the simple fact of its beauty. That’s not to deny that it’s sometimes ugly, or ill-conceived, or just stupid; but time spent gazing at a work of art is not time wasted. It is just completely pointless.

But art is beautiful. It requires newspaper. Page 3 is not the defining reason why people buy The Sun so this change would not lose them readers. With the huge availability of pornography and top shelf magazines, people do not have to look far for their Page 3 fix. At least these maga-

zines do what they say on the tin. Page 3 was created in the ‘70s by men, in a male dominated industry and in a male dominated country. Forty years have passed, attitudes have changed hugely. So why has The Sun stayed the same?

Friday 9th November 2012

Media and the Gender ‘Ideal’

media creates certain images, it is us as a society which enforces them. We become shaped by our environment.

Words by Katherine Henderson

No matter where we source our inspirations from, we need to realise that the images that the media provides are unrealistic. Most of the time, they are unattainable. Much greater emphasis needs to be put on pressuring the media to rid itself of edited photographs in advertisements. So many column inches are dedicated to ‘exposing’ make-up free celebrities and promoting a false expectation of women, but why are real people presented as disgusting monsters?

Current media culture continually delivers conflicting messages on the ‘ideal’ appearance. Audiences are bombarded with images of immaculate celebrities through all channels of media, there is no escaping the impact. Teamed with new scientific innovations in plastic surgery, we are now increasingly faced by unattainable examples of the ‘ideal’. However, whilst the

An Italian Job

Men are not immune from these effects and are influenced by images of David Beckham in his undies. But what effect is this having? The organisation Care UK claims that 1 in 100 women between the ages of 15 and 30 suffer seriously from an eating disorder but offer no statistical information for men.

Words by Jac Larner The news that Silvio Berlusconi has been convicted of tax fraud will come as no surprise to many across the globe. The Clown of Europe’s reputation for corruption, love affairs and fondness for ‘Bunga Bunga’ Parties is well known, but this image hides just how dangerous Berlusconi really is.

This is something our society needs to address. From the changing ‘ideal’ images of busty Pamela Anderson to skinny Kate Moss and athletic sportsmen to muscular actors like Ryan Reynolds, it will be a long time before we live in a society where realistic images sell media.

Lessons Learnt From Women's Magazines Words by Lexi Keegan #1. You’re beautiful. If you are a size 10, you are a real woman with curves that men love. Beauty comes with self-confidence. But do not be old. Or fat. Or have pores. If you are then hide behind make up and mask your human imperfections (it is empowering, honest). #2. Even though celebrities pig out on burgers and chips all the time, there is no reason why you cannot juggle kids and exercise routine each day and make healthy dinners every night. But should you ever eat processed food then you

have got to give up on that flat stomach and pert rear now. #3. To get him to fall in love with you, be small and delicate and passive and confident and like obscure books and be unable to tell jokes and be the perfect hostess and have a pretty tattoo and never get too drunk or bring up dangerous topics like abortion or motherhood because it’ll scare him off. And when you have sex, have just the right amount of kink and laugh at Fifty Shades of Grey and copy lots of the ideas without understanding why it’s problematic and if you enjoy vanilla you’re a bore and a prude and you should spice it up a bit. And why don’t you bring food into the bedroom? After all, "A mashed banana or peaches inserted in your vagina is a delightful invitation for him to whoosh his penis around in it".

Your View – Is The Television License Fee Fair? Words by Anna Parker

Unlike the other mainstream channels, the BBC has to ensure that it provides content that will appeal to all demographics. Hence, whether via the television, radio or online, the BBC provides a variety of entertainment that caters for all. The BBC is a hub of creativity in this regard. BBC One, for example, tends to provide more mainstream family-friendly entertainment, and

can be relied upon for inspiring documentaries that, alone, make the licence fee worth it. Many of the best British comedies began on BBC Radio, including Little Britain and Alan Partridge.

Channels such as ITV and Channel 4 have their own agenda separate from that of the viewers. Even though much maligned of late, the BBC is an institution that has yet to be taken over by the almighty gods of advertising. The fact that it is still

One More Question for the BBC Words by William Coulter In the coming weeks and months the BBC will have many questions to answer about the true nature of cover-ups relating to Jimmy Saville. Now is the best time to ask the fundamental question, do we still need to pay the TV licence? Yearly, monthly or quarterly we are taxed to watch live TV, when the fee pays for the BBC only. The lunacy extends; there is no requirement to pay the fee to listen to BBC Radio or to watch the iPlayer service. Why then, when ITV makes its money from advertising, am I forced to pay the BBC when I want

to watch Emmerdale on a different channel? It is an outdated system. The licence fee was first introduced when the BBC was the only service and money was needed to build infrastructure. Now, in the days of monthly subscriptions to satellite, cable and on demand services, people are voting with their feet away from BBC services. Those who do not mind paying for the service could well continue under a new opt-in system. Those who want to watch live BBC should bear the true cost.

publicly funded insures this. Can one really argue that the adverts during Channel 4’s Paralympics


coverage didn’t get annoying and spoil the viewing experience? The BBC just does it better.

One less well-known fact about Berlusconi is that this is not the first time that he has been sentenced to jail. He has been battling the Italian judicial system for two decades, having been found guilty on three occasions previously, on charges ranging from bribery to illegally financing a political party.

Somehow Berlusconi has evaded any punishment, all previous charges being overturned. Journalists on both sides of the Atlantic may be making a lot of Berlusconi’s conviction, but it is unlikely that this time will be any different. Berlusconi’s punishments will not come into effect until he has exhausted his appeals, a process which can take years. Considering he remains one of the most powerful men in Italy, Berlusconi is likely to use his considerable resources in the appeal process to have him acquitted, resources that cannot be matched by anyone in the state. While no longer Prime Minister, he’s still the head of Italy’s largest party, giving him a de facto veto on any legislation, and owner of three of Italy’s four private TV channels. In reality Berlusconi’s conviction will achieve little, but importantly it has made him look, if only briefly, vulnerable for the first time. The world has stopped laughing and caught a glimpse of the real Silvio Berlusconi. In the end it is this, not a court case, which may bring Berlusconi’s reign to an end.

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SU BAR QUIZ night with prizes and lots of fun every Thursday 9pm |





Interview: The Cribs @ The Waterfront, Norwich 24/10/2012 Words by Becky Excell Having been absent from this venue since touring their second album back in 2005, it is all too clear how much The Cribs have achieved since their last visit. The temporary addition of ex-The Smiths legend Johnny Marr to their ranks for fourth album ‘Ignore the Ignorant’ was a sure-fire acknowledgement of their worth. And after recently winning a Q Award for the ‘Spirit of Independence’ The Cribs have a proudly cemented themselves a sturdy history and impressive back catolgue. We convened for a much needed catch-up with twothirds of Jarman brothers, ahead of their live performance at The Waterfront in Norwich. Becky Excell: Happy Birthday to you both for the other day! Get anything good? Gary Jarman: Didn’t get much, we’re studio nerds; we both

got microphones! I’ve had a microphone for my birthday every year since I was seventeen.

kind of had a quick route to the top or whatever… and now they’re all finished.

BE: Are they somehow better every year?

RJ: It’s funny for it to be so synonymous with us these days, doing everything in the band DIY, it’s not like we do it on purpose or anything; it just makes sense to us.

GJ: It’s just such a safe bet with me. Me and Ryan are pretty enigmatic gift-wise as we don’t really give a shit about fashion…

GJ: It’s more fun… RJ: It’s weird to win an award for that, but as we were saying, it is nice I suppose to get the acknowledgement.

Ryan Jarman: We’re always on tour, it’s not like you have anywhere to put anything. BE: Do you like the intimate setting of The Waterfront? Or are you more at home on bigger stages? GJ:



GJ: Yeah, don’t want to be flippant about it; it’s definitely nice to be acknowledged for your way of doing things, if only for accuracy’s sake…


RJ: The last time we were out on tour we were doing festivals, before that we were touring America in a van doing shows in small rock clubs. We just like it to be different, keep things interesting. BE: Do you feel like you have to change your set list to adjust to different venues? RJ: Not really. We play the set depending on what we feel that night in the dressing room. GJ: We don’t change it that much. We find something that works and base it off that. It’s hard after five

For the full interview please head over to the blog! acknowledgement. records to fit everything in; you’ve always got to play the singles… I would like to start dropping some of the singles and start putting in rarities. But it’s hard because that will please some and not others. RJ: It’s just hard to find a balance. BE: So you won the ‘Spirit of Independence’ Q Award the

Live Review: Benjamin Francis Leftwich @ KOKO, London 24/10/12 Words by Amy Foster Seeing acoustic artists perform live always seems more precious than seeing a rock show at Wembley. In the intimate KOKO club in Camden, when Benjamin Francis Leftwich picked up his guitar and silenced a sold-out crowd, I knew it was going to be a special night. Leftwich began the show by playing ‘Pictures’, one of the most well-known tracks from his debut album ‘Last Smoke Before The Snowstorm’. After

Ones To Watch: Swim Deep Words by Mark Wood Well, it finally looks like Sheffield is not the only city bustling with creativity, birthing some of the UK’s mould-shattering acts. With the recent breakthrough of Birmingham quartet PEACE, it looks as though fellow Brummies Swim Deep are next in line to the throne.

Formed by two friends working at Morrisons, Swim Deep not only provide hope to everyone stuck in unsatisfactory employment, but also a captivating blend of dreamy grunge-pop. Having recently supported Spector across their current UK tour, Swim Deep are rapidly gaining momentum in lieu of their own UK tour which commences on the 14 February 2013. Their most recent single ‘Honey’ is released on the 5 November this year and is yet another enigmatic track with a baggy ‘90s edge.

However, my favourite track is their penultimate single ‘King City’; an eerie, bass-driven track complimented by the soothing vocals of lead singer Austin Williams, while the synth and falsetto backing vocals harmoniously chime throughout. As with PEACE, Swim Deep are a band who are refreshingly dissimilar to the norm, but are also in turn difficult to define in terms of genre. But perhaps that’s half the appeal? I never liked my comfort zone anyway.

other day which you must be really pleased about! Is it nice to be recognised for being a more independent DIY band?

GJ: Yeah, don’t want to be flippant about it; it’s definitely nice to be acknowledged for your way of doing things, if only for accuracy’s sake…

GJ: Recognition yeah, it’s just nice to think that… people are aware and have acknowledged the fact that you did take a different route. There was a period of time where a lot of bands came out after us and they

For the full interview please head over to the blog.

the opening song, Letwich was joined on stage by his band. At first, I was concerned about how his songs would work with a band behind them, given that the album is so quiet and delicate. But I needn’t have worried. For the most part, especially during ‘1904’ and ‘Shine’, the band provided a nice, warm texture. The addition of a driving drum beat and lead and pedal guitars made ‘Box of Stones’ come to life.

one of those moments you want to put in a box and keep forever.

Then Leftwich attempted something unusual, especially for a headlining spot in London. He unplugged his guitar, stepped back and told the audience that we needed to be quiet; In an instant, the place fell silent. Leftwich stood on the edge of the stage and started playing ‘Maps’, a gorgeous, delicate track from his early EP ‘A Million Miles Out’. It was a spinetingling, intimate experience;

For the encore Leftwich treated the audience to an extended version of ‘Don’t Go Slow’, another track which worked well with a band who brought it to a rousing climax. For the finale, the band left and Leftwich unplugged his guitar again, this time asking for the audiences help with what was to come. He commenced playing the opening chords of ‘Atlas Hands’ to a silenced room; in hushed tones, the crowd sang along with him: “When the stars are the only thing we share,/Will you be there?”. It was a charming end to a magical evening and a Benjamin Leftwich Francis gig is a must-do for any lover of acoustic music. Go and see him live – you will not regret it.

Friday 9th November 2012

Album Reviews Ellie Goulding: Halcyon Words by Keir Waller Prior to her album’s release date, Ellie Goulding released single ‘Anything Can Happen’. Questions were raised and reception was mixed; while some listeners enjoy the fun bouncy beat, others are repelled by the squeaky chorus. Admittedly, I fall into the latter category; while Goulding’s vocal talent is unquestionable, the chorus is very irritating. For many the main fear was that the quirky blonde singer would

succumb to the money and churn out dozens of mainstream pop songs. Forgiving a few tracks, this has not been the case and a sweet blend has been produced. Much like her debut album ‘Lights’, there is a pleasing variety of tracks, with the light and friendly ‘Only You’ and ‘Halcyon’ contrasting with more delicate songs such as ‘Dead In The Water’. Without a doubt, the gem of the album is ‘Hanging On’. Originally written several months beforehand by alternative band Active Child, this song is certainly better suited to Goulding, with lyrics describing an internal struggle and desperate attempt to make sense of a failing relationship: “Tell me if you feel

Coheed and Cambria: The Afterman: Ascension For those unfamiliar with Coheed and Cambria, a word of warning: it can be much more difficult to familiarise yourself with the band than most other artists. Not only does the New York prog-rock quartet now have six studio releases under their belt, but they also have an on-going story stretching throughout each


this pain,/Cause I don’t want to be a ball and chain”. It is a powerful song in its own right, but Tinie Tempah definitely adds something special to the single version. Next up is the subject of disgusting bass. Goulding is no stranger to having her beautiful voice gruesomely defiled by various dubstep artists and the result is usually something wonderfully diabolical. To save the likes of Jakwob and Bassnectar time, producer Mike Spencer has produced ‘Figure 8’, which has all the trademarks of a Nero track. As much hard bass as possible has been crammed into this track and it does genuinely work. Also, we could hardly have an English of the concept albums which are accompanied by a science-fiction comic book series and novel. That can be a time consuming challenge for even the most enthusiastic new fan, but luckily the latest release, The Afterman: Ascension, does an effective job introducing the new fan to the band’s style.

Words by Ben Kosma


Opening track ‘The Hollow’ is the most intriguing intro track from the band to date, with a somewhat strange and cinematic dialogue between the on-going story’s main character and his ship, enticing the listener to listen on. From then, the album strikes from all sides; tracks jump in style without awkwardness from the dark and imposing aural assault of ‘Domino

album without club music mogul Calvin Harris getting his paws on a track – this time it is ‘I Need Your Love’ which will be in the charts soon... I promise. the Destitute’ and the sweet yet mournful tone of ‘The Afterman’ to the unashamedly enjoyable ‘Goodnight, Fair Lady’ and twisted tones of ‘Holly Wood The Cracked’. All of this, as usual, is led by vocalist Claudio Sanchez’s powerfully high voice and accented by lead guitarist Travis Stever’s intricate and often subtle noodling. The album also features a return from original drummer Josh Eppard, whose style is an easily noticeable and enjoyably less clinical than that of his former replacement, Chris Pennie.

time round, with no extensive passages of instrumental madness and only one song longer than seven minutes (whereas previous releases have featured a series of tracks of a lengthier breed). All in all, this album does not touch the heights of the band’s first three releases, but it is yet another strong effort. A definite step up from previous album, ‘Year of the Black Rainbow’, The Afterman: Ascension is sure to bring in a sizable number of new fans.

Die-hard fans may be a little dismayed by the more ‘manageable’ song lengths this

Track Reviews Dead Sons: Hangman

Words by Billy White

Villagers: The Waves Words by Mark Wood Those who are familiar with Villagers will immediately credit Conor O’Brien’s wonderfully pure voice, potent lyrics and the acoustic backing that loyally shadows him. But when I first listened to ‘The Waves’, I immediately became concerned; it rather uncharacteristically - chooses to ignore many of the main conventions which supported Villagers’ debut release ‘Becoming A Jackal‘. The electronic pulse which sets the pace for the entire track indubitably shifts the focus

away from O’Brien’s voice and most importantly, his enigmatic lyrics. However, by the halfway mark it is clear that ‘The Waves’ is steadily beginning to build a sense of impending doom. As the screech of the electric guitar sustains longer and longer, it feels as though you are being dangled on the edge of a cliff by a shoelace, before O’Brien eventually flings you into the fathoms below. It is a solid first release from forthcoming album ‘Awayland‘, which is set to be released on 14 January 2013. ‘The Waves’ more than fulfils the only purpose singles seem to have these days… to act as a flyer for the album. I’m intrigued to say the least.

Distilling the sound of Arctic Monkeys, The Black Keys and Queens Of The Stone Age into one angry lovechild, Sheffield based Dead Sons release 'Hangman' into the world as the second single from their forthcoming debut album 'The Hollers And The Hymns'. Having formed with two exmembers from the now defunct Milburn, it's not surprising that Dead Sons still manage to retain all the melody of the mid-noughties indie band they once were while integrating this with their much heavier, sleazy persona. 'Hangman' opens with the type of riff that typically plays in my head when I have just dropped off my library books without paying the modest fine that I've defiantly accumulated. Well okay... nothing could

quite be THAT badass, but it is pretty close. Luke Baker's voice snarls into action with the rest of the band in perfect unison; 'Hangman' quickly descends into a hypnotic track with a tribal rhythm and a bad attitude. The b-side to this single comes in the form of 'Electricity', a track driven by a looping guitar arpeggio, electronic pulse and intermittent vocals which immediately incite imagery of the relentless Sahara sun. These three factors tie together to give

this song a somewhat math-rock feel, something which is typically uncharacteristic of Dead Sons. However, this track is still thoroughly welcome as an additional sibling to the Dead Sons family. The familiar fuzzbass comfortingly rumbles below before a suitably subdued and over-driven guitar sees this track to the end of its plight.


“A love of the precisely observed moment.” Meg Ryan Words from the Editor “The film captured the real essence of romantic comedy: that people in love share language, they share rhythm, even though they're so different.” Meg Ryan, an actor who is perhaps best known for her role in romantic comedies, such as ‘When Harry Met Sally’ and

‘You’ve Got Mail’, was perhaps the face of this genre for the best part of a decade in Hollywood. Since those golden days, the romantic comedy genre has been gaining a bad name. Specifically because of the films which starred our favourite ‘Friend’, Jennifer Aniston. She starred in many a run of the mill romantic comedies, from ‘The Bounty Hunter’ to ‘The Switch’, Aniston proved that not every romantic comedy was a sure fire hit.




The problem was, that those romantic comedies didn’t have a heart. They felt tired, old news, simply re hashed to fit a genre which was once so great.

producer and director of some of the greatest romantic comedies of the eighties and nineties, she was a celebrated Auteur and produced some brilliant films.

Now, you mustn’t assume that the demise of the romantic comedy genre is down to one actor, that would be unfair. But, the genre has changed from its early days. In Nora Ephron’s days. If you haven’t heard of Nora Ephron, then you most certainly will by the end of this issue. A writer,

She single handedly formed the careers of Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks. Again, two on screen stars who seem destined to be together in Ephron’s films. Whether you love them, or hate them. There is easiness about a rom-com, they are highly watchable and at the same time, there is an element of impos-

sibility. In this issue we will be reliving this wonderful genre, and celebrating the woman who effectively created the genre, Nora Ephron. And the subsequent films which were inspired by this filmmaker. Love to write? Love films? Then you can easily write for the Rabbit Film Section, you can find us on Twitter at @therabbitfilm1 and on Facebook on The Rabbit Film Section. Or, alternatively you can email me at,

Romantic Comedies: 2000 - 2011 Words by Yazen Al-Salman The last few years have not exactly been the best for romantic comedies. It’s gotten too stereotypical, too formulaic, almost the same movie over and over. But, through those lean years some movies shine, and here is my top 10 of those movies, in alphabetical order: ‘Almost Famous’ (Cameron Crowe, 2000): Cameron Crowe’s wonderful story of sex, drugs and rock ’n roll set in 1973 follows his alter ego, as played by Patrick Fugit, as a teenage journalist touring with a band. Crowe won the Oscar for best Original Screenplay for this offering. ‘Before Sunset’ (Richard Linklater,

2004): In this follow-up to 1995’s “Before Sunrise”, the same team returns of director Richard Linklater, and co-stars and co-writers Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy, as the 2 ex-lovers meet again and spend an afternoon together in Paris. ‘Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind’ (Michel Gondry, 2004): This movie has increasingly gained attention and is now regarded as one of the best movies of the past decade. Another wacky brainchild of screenwriter Charlie Kaufman starring Jim Carrey who discovers that his ex, Kate Winslet, has undergone an experiment erasing all of her memories of them together. ‘500 Days Of Summer’ (Marc Webb, 2009): The film that prob-

ably re-launched Joseph GordonLevitt to stardom. An amazingly real, grounded and affecting look at the 500-day long relationship between Gordon-Levitt’s character and Zooey Deschanel’s. ‘High Fidelity’ (Stephen Frears, 2000): Stephen Frears adaptation of Nick Hornby’s novel is an earnest look at a record store clerk dissecting his past romantic endeavours. Includes some amazing music tracks and a great supporting turn by Jack Black. ‘Juno’ (Jason Reitman, 2007): This pleasure of a movie is a look at how a teenage girl, played by Ellen Page, gets pregnant, and how the people around her respond to it. Funny, truthful and

immensely intelligent, this is one of the best films on this list. ‘Lost In Translation’ (Sofia Coppola, 2003): Is it exactly a romantic comedy? Is it even a comedy? Do you care? Sofia Coppola made one of the most sincere and uncompromising films of any era, creating characters so affecting and mature that shame most of the conventional crap some movies spew. ‘Punch Drunk Love’ (Paul Thomas Anderson, 2002): Apparently, at his Cannes press-Conference for Magnolia, in 1999, P.T Anderson said that his next film will be a Rom-Com starring Adam Sandler. He delivered on his promise with this quirky take on a simple man with seven sisters who

meets the woman of his dreams. ‘Sideways’ (Alexander Payne, 2004): This Oscar winning movie follows Paul Giamatti, as an unsuccessful writer, on a road trip with his friend, as played by Thomas Haden Church, and they meet a couple of women, Sandra Oh and Virginia Madsen, who add a little of spice to their trip. ‘Wall.e’ (Andrew Stanton, 2008): One of the best animated films ever, and contacting a 40-minute opening that contains no dialogue. It follows a recycling robot, Wall-E, who lives on earth, alone, in the year 2105. Then, one day, he is visited by a female robot, Eve. And that sparks some electricity (literally) between them.

Friday 9th November 2012



Nora Ephron – A True Wit

Following the news of her death, her friends, colleagues and admirers in Hollywood all sang the praise of this film maker. Who will always be able to remind us of the things which truly matter, love, food and life:

Words by Naomi Jeffreys On June 26, 2012, Nora Ephron, writer, director and a filmmaker who is best known for her romantic comedies, passed away of leukaemia aged 71. I felt it would be appropriate to show what a fantastic and illustrious career she had. Nora Ephron was born on May 19 1941, in New York City. Both parents were screenwriters. She graduated from Beverly Hills High School in 1958 and became interested in journalism. She majored in political science and wrote for the weekly newspaper at Wellesley College from which she graduated in 1962. But, after a short lived career in journalism, Ephron found her metier in screenwriting. Her first writing success was ‘When Harry Met Sally’ (1989) directed by Rob Reiner, starred Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan. The infamous line: “men and women can never be friends because the

500 Days of Summer Words by Benjamin Pinsent This is not so much a romantic comedy as a thesis on relationships. As the title suggests the film follows five hundred days in the life of Joseph Gordon Levitt. As he meets, falls in love with and is dumped by the titular Summer, played by Zooey Deschanel who is all quirky habits, big eyes and smiles. This is a really hard film to talk about, those who have seen it love it and those who haven’t say that they really should. There is clear on screen chemistry between the two stars and each has a certain off beat charm that is somewhat lacking from the modern formulaic rom-com.

“Nora Ephron… knew what was important to know; how things worked, what was worthwhile, who was fascinating and why. At a dinner table and on a film set she lifted us all with wisdom and wit mixed with love for us and love for life.” – Tom Hanks.

sex part always gets in the way.” Her next film was the wonderful ‘Sleepless in Seattle’ (1993). As director, Ephron cast Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks. The lyrical language woven throughout the film is perhaps what makes the film so pleasing for audiences; “At one point I looked down, at our hands, and I couldn’t tell which fingers were mine and which were his.”

Through ‘Sleepless in Seattle’ Ephron established herself in Hollywood as one of the foremost creators of romantic comedies. In ‘You’ve Got Mail’ (1998) starred Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan in a contemporary variation on the classic comedy, ‘The Shop Around the Corner’ (1940). Ephron’s style is cemented in this film, comedy, snappy dialogue and the emotional centre at its heart. It is a film which

warms audience’s hearts, like all of Ephron’s films and proved to be another box office smash. Her last film, ‘Julie and Julia’ (2009), told the parallel stories of prominent food writer Julia Child and Julie Powell. A contemporary woman, who is stuck in an employment rut, and intends to cook her way through Julia Child’s classic Mastering the Art of French Cooking. Her final hurrah.

“Nora was an era. We pictured ourselves inside her dreams and they became ours. All wisdom, wit and sparkle lights, what a treat she was, what a blessing… to have created a simple happiness in people, to have added to the sum of delight in the world.” – Meg Ryan Much like the ending of ‘You’ve Got Mail’, Ephron is probably “Somewhere over the rainbow, way up high” “And the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true” you taught us that our dreams could come true. So thank you, Nora Ephron, you will be missed.

There is no weird argument that drives them apart and there is no after feelings that get these two back together. The film is an audio visual exploration into real relationships. Not everything is a Hollywood romance, and writers Scott Neustadter and Michael H. Weber understand this. The soundtrack is an eclectic mix of pop music, slightly below the mainstream adding a whole new layer for lovers of music as well as movies. If you are still humming and ha-ing about seeing this movie, don’t; it is a perfect film to watch any time.

Crazy, Stupid Love Words by Benjamin Pinsent After all those films about the start of a relationship are you hankering for a film about the end of one? What if it has Steve Carell, Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone? This rather interesting film shows the breaking up of Carl and Emily Weaver’s Marriage. As Carl wallows in self-pity and doubt he is noticed by man’s man, Jacob who tries to teach Carl in the matters of a single life. However, as Jacob falls in love himself, the relationships between all the characters get more complicated. This comedy draws from some-

thing more subtle and adult than other rom-coms, which is clearly showcased through the almost farcical climax of the film. This is manly accredited to the witty script by Dan Fogelman and the realistic performances by the actors, especially a top leading performance by Carell, who gives Carl a paradoxically romantic and disillusioned feel. There is a rather awkward and very sentimental moment at the end which does spoil the film’s flow, leaving a rather different impression than the rest of the film. But apart from that it is a funny ride through a mid-life crisis and first loves. Top Five Romantic Comedy Quotes 1. “I am just a girl standing in front of a boy asking him to love her.” ‘Notting Hill’ 2.“I came here tonight because

when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.” ‘When Harry Met Sally’ breath catches in my chest until I hear three little words: You’ve got mail. I hear nothing, not even a sound on the streets of New York, just the beat of my own heart. I have mail. From you.” ‘You’ve Got Mail’ 4.“Destiny is something we've invented because we can't stand the fact that everything that happens is accidental. “ ‘Sleepless in Seattle’ 5.“That’s your problem! You don’t want to be in love. You want to be in love in a movie.” ‘Sleepless in Seattle’.




New Girl: Picking Up Where Friends Left Off ? Words by Jacob Cooper Does the plot of a group of goodlooking Americans sharing a spacious flat sound familiar? Well like ‘Friends’ and many other sitcoms, this is the scenario of the latest US import ‘New Girl’. Light-hearted and non-serious in its comedy ‘New Girl’ separates itself from other US sitcoms; as it does not rely on generic laughter and annoyingly unrealistic scenarios to make the audience chuckle. The characters are very distinguished and can be easily related to by the viewer. First, there is the adorable-yet-dorky Jess – the namesake of the title ‘New Girl’ – played by Zooey Deschanel . A former primary (elementary) school teacher who constantly sings, she goes from one love interest to another and finds herself heartbroken very often. A reoccurring theme in the show is the string of awkward situations Jess finds herself in with her flatmates but these remain realistic and hilarious throughout.

Next, there is the “broken penis guy” Schmidt - whose habits and words regularly result in him contributing to the ‘douchebag jar’. Despite his vainness and love of cleaning, he struggles to get over Jess’s best friend and model Cece, whose undercover relationship is a main themes of the first series. His jerky ways make him equally annoying as he is hilarious, a com-

bination which makes him loveable to some, unbearable for others. Then there’s Nick, the pessimistic, turtle-faced bartender who struggles to get over his ex-girlfriend and acts as a character the audience can feel genuine sympathy for. He prefers to live in a flat full of broken appliances rather than spend cash fixing them, and Schmidt’s rich lifestyle regularly conflicts with this in a hilarious way. Nick

Cut-off in Their Prime Words by Tom Steggall I would hate to be bundled into the category of ‘hipster’ but there is nothing I hate more than a show that sells out. Neglecting its original fan base in the hope of attaining popular acclaim. It happens literally every five seconds in the music industry, but TV is also guilty of such condemnable acts. These are most perfectly displayed by American series’ whose networks commission endless seasons scheduled for years in advance. Of course I am referring to my pet hate, namely ‘Dexter’. Originally quite a small thriller-drama series about an asexual serial killer, ‘Dexter’ has transformed into a stupid, ludacris teen fantasy. The viewer is treated to casual nudity at the drop of a hat just to keep you from averting your gaze towards anything even moderately more interesting. However, when you think about it isn’t every programme attempting to sell out? Without selling out how could anyone ever be acknowledged? Purely by flogging your wares you are directly selling out, and if it is not of disappointment to your fans then it is of disappointment to yourself for letting

serves as Jess’s best male friend in the show, and their hidden love will surely blossom into something corny-yet-heart-warming. Lastly there’s Winston, an ex-Latvian basketball player who has an uncanny ability to pick up new skills. His love of sports found him finally getting a job as a research assistant to the host of a local sports radio show, Joe Napoli. Despite regularly showing off to Nick and Schmidt people judge you and mould you. Returning to the point of a show’s termination; there are plenty of classics that were cut off in their prime. Whether this was for better or for worse we will never know for sure. What I attempt to offer you is a small selection of shows v in the knowledge that they started well and ended well, maintaining every scrap of dignity they ever possessed. ‘Arrested Development’ was potentially the funniest and most clever American sitcom of all time. It was unique in the sense that it did not have a blundering laughter track for the purpose of docile idiots who need to be told when to laugh. This was simply the story of a rich family on the verge of breakdown. The show possesses so much depth and a non-linear plot, absent in most US sitcoms. The show was cancelled in its third season due to its unpopularity and the fact that Americans failed to find it funny. This speaks volumes. If Americans don’t find it funny it could only be a good thing. We are talking about a nation whose current comedy exports reside within ‘The Big Bang Theory’, oh dear! ‘BrassEye’ was a satirical set of spoof documentaries aimed at making celebrities look like tits; in their willingness to plug nonsense charities and raise awareness of bogus moral panics. Chris Morris put his heart and soul into this seven part series but I never

about his relationship with his ‘beautiful Shelby’, his character is the least action-packed of the four. The characters are so realistic and loveable that you may find it hard to believe they’re not your actual friends. It is not yet clear when the second series of New Girl will appear on E4, but it is most definitely a series worth waiting for.

see it being repeated on Channel 4. Which is a serious shame considering that nobody has attempted to do anything remotely similar. Sticking with the comedy theme here are a few series that were kept to a maximum of three seasons but were individual cases of genius; something that we should repeatedly broadcast to remind people that shows like ‘Miranda’ don’t constitute comedy. These gems include: ‘I’m Alan Partridge’, ‘Spaced’, ‘Father Ted’, ‘Fawlty Towers’, ‘The Office’ and ‘The Fast Show’ to name a few. I am never sure whether to be angered by the fact that I never got to see more of my all-time favourite TV; or be elated by the fact that the producers were confident enough to end the series so that I am only reminded of the good aspects. In saying this, there is a show to buck this trend and it is called ‘Peep Show’, which is soon to return for an eighth series. ‘Peep Show’ remains the pinnacle of British comedy, it is quirky and consistent in delivering numerous laughs per episode. Don’t be fooled, an eighth series obviously signals some kind of popularity, meaning that if something is so good why should it end. Take note ‘Dexter’, leave with your held high.

Friday 9th November 2012



Review: Homeland Season 2

I challenge you to watch the first season of ‘Homeland’ and try to resist playing all of the episodes back to back. You will find it impossible.

Words by Tom Steggall

The less I go into detail about ‘Homeland’ the better. There are so many dramatic twists and turns that it would be literally impossible to talk about the plot without revealing any spoilers. The premise of the show is that psychopathic CIA agent, Carrie Mathison (Claire Danes), is on a mission to reveal the truth about a recently rescued prisoner of war, Nick Brody (Damien Lewis). Who she believes has been turned by the Taliban to be used as a weapon against the USA. Carrie is a maverick, acting upon impulse and not following CIA protocol, causing her to be a genius in exile. T

Being faced with the task of reviewing ‘Homeland’ has caused me a great deal of misery. I wanted to save all of the episodes until the series was finished so that I could pursue my usual tactic of watching an entire series in the course of one day. Much to my annoyance, I felt as though I needed to watch the first three episodes of the second season (now airing on C4). This was so that I could deliver a comprehensive and engaging review of the programme at hand. In fact, what has happened is that each Sunday I am left like a heroin addict reluctantly going through withdrawal, whilst being taunted with the promise of the next episode being in a week’s time. The majority may not view a week as a significant period of time, but

he first series follows along the lines of whether Brody is a terrorist or not, and this is consistent

Pilot Review: Arrow Words by Rich Peto

Top Trumps: Words by Richard Peto

Jack Gleeson

Chandler Riggs

Also known as: Prince Joffrey

Also known as: Carl Grimes

Show: Game of Thrones

Show: The Walking Dead

Acting ability: 9

Acting ability: 9

Cockiness: 7

Cockiness: 3

Wimp level: 8

Wimp level: 4

Child-like tantrums: 6

Child-like tantrums: 1

Most bad-ass moment: Ordering the execution of the much loved daddy Stark

Most bad-ass moment: Surviving a rifle shot

Teen heartthrob?: No

Teen heartthrob: Time will tell

With limited knowledge on the DC comic series and an opening reminiscent of a mockumentary, I wasn't sure what to expect from ‘Arrow’. However, after finishing the show it became clear that this is clearly a comic conversion inspired by Christopher Nolan's batman films. Stephen Amell plays Oliver Green, the sole survivor of a cruise accident, leaving him stranded and isolated for five years on a pacific island. The show begins with his eventual rescue and his decision to fight crime armed with a trusty bow and arrow. Green also has some daddy issues as he's the grieving son of a millionaire who just wanted to help his city, who

also had the means to develop some fancy crime fighting tech. You’d be right for wondering whether “inspired by Batman” is an understatement. Is ‘Arrow’ an unsubtle attempt to rip off and reboot Batman ahead of time with a costume change? At present I can't tell you. However, I can tell you that the show has the potential to improve and has a number of uniquely creative elements that should keep you entertained. The most impressive point to make is that in taking on gun slinging villains with a bow and arrow, Green does not look like a complete ass hat. The action scenes are in fact excellent: impressive martial arts manoeuvres, some original, POV flare and even the odd criminal execution. The obligatory super hero training montage is also done well and the musical score is on par with any recent super hero con-

throughout the second season so far. ‘Homeland’ truly is a masterpiece, so much so that Barack Obama has claimed to be a massive fan. Lewis gives a truly ground breaking performance. However the real star of the show is Danes. Who I believe gives the best female performance in any series ever made, honestly no one comes close, as proved by her Golden Globe award for best actress. I assure you that even if the series is not your cup of tea, you will still be astounded by her catalogue of facial expressions and erratic behaviour. If you want something that makes your heart race with adrenalin then this is for you, it is cheaper than heroin but unfortunately even more addictive. Now please excuse me whilst I watch babies crawl across the ceiling and sweat profusely under a blanket as I wait until next Sunday. version to the big screen. By the end of the show we already have a number of unexpected twists and intriguing flash backs leaving me with some hope that as the show continues it will improve. The acting as a whole is unfortunately sub-par given the setting. The writers miss out on opportunities to develop what could be a cast of complex and emotionally engrossing characters. This could be forgiven had Green at least had some emotional fallout from his isolation, but all we are left with is a cliché and cheesy nightmare scene. At present, ‘Arrow’ is a show that you can take or leave. Still, it's easy to forget the context. This is a super hero drama with a pilot length of just forty minutes. Keeping these constraints in mind, I’m going to remain cautiously optimistic about Arrow's potential in the long term.




Once upon a time... In a Kingdom far far away. . . . . .is a place that we have all known and loved, but does this magical

world of princesses, knights and girls in little red capes have a place in the 21st Century? I talk to Marina Warner, one of our very own professors and pick her brain about the undeniable renewed interest in stories that allow our

increasingly cynical world to believe in happily ever after.

Words by Camela Cuison


Recently there has been a strong Fairy tale revival in popular culture (Grimm, Ever After, Two Snow White Films this summer, to name but a few) why do you think that character we are all very familiar with, are suddenly a strong point of interest again?

Words by Emily Townsend

My sense is that the tensions and uncertainties of the times are contributing to a return to fantasy of all kinds, from allegory and myth in poetry and on the stage, to fairy tale re-interpretations or re-visioning in the cinema. Alongside the interplay between dark times and the need for hope and consolation, other contributing factors are global networks, which need to speak in a common language, which fairy tales provide and a general rise in the value of genre in literature - gothic, horror, paranormal, and pornography are all increasing in readership and stature - a strong matter for debate! In my lifetime fairy tales started off as bed time stories and Disney films, but more recently have been aimed more towards teenagers and adults, why do you think this transition to an older audience has occurred? The history of criticism, psychoanalytic and feminist, has strongly directed interest towards the latent, complex, 'adult' meanings of the tales. Angela Carter is a dominant voice in this development, but there are others - Anne Sexton in US, Jeanette Winterson and Sara Maitland here. When The Guardian was reviewing the new collection of fairy tales by Philip Pullman, he admitted that: "The characters are conventional, the imagery obvious and there's very little description - but the stories are irresistible." What fresh aspect has Philip Pullman brought to this new collection? Furthermore do you think these stories need to be re-written? I have mixed feelings - I would have liked him to revision them

completely, not render them so scrupulously in a form of translation, as he has done. Fairy tales have previously been accused of being politically incorrect, females are portrayed as two-dimensional, often swinging between a black and white moral binary. With new revivals such as the Philip Pullman collection and Angela Carter's beautiful anthology, do you think that some intrinsic magic and mystique has been lost by snooping around the psychology of our most beloved childhood characters? NO, I think the process of telling and re-telling involves constant transformation, and writers and storytellers have always responded to the needs of their audiences as well as expressing their own vision. There are aspects of the fairy tales which are unacceptable to us for good reason now, but of course values change. Also, there is no true original of the famous stories - Perrault is one of the first, the Grimms collected many that had never survived in manuscript or print before, but they weren't 'new'. They were streamlets from the vast current flowing out of the ocean of stories!

Following on from the last question, if you had the choice to encourage the classic fairy tales or perhaps the more "politically correct" recent ones to a younger generation, which ones would you pick? For children, I'd go for the new retellings by authors who have them in mind - for example, Brian Alderson did a Grimms a while ago with illustrations - and it is captivating. For over 15s I'd recommend the revisionings by writers like Angela Carter, but expect them to read the founding collections, Perrault, Grimm, Anderson as well.

Look - it’s me again Churning the barrels of time like an ancient clockwork mouse Dickory, Cinderella, Midnight’s fresh air bounds me to a staple, a house A glass slipper shimmering in a Dorset window, Fitting only one perfect in matrimony for its maker, Only her sisters wouldn’t wager,

I am aware that at the moment you are working on a Grimm series, could you give me some more details about your project?

How long it would take to break her

It's a series of ten programmes, 15 mins each, taking a story at a time and opening it out into questions such as: “Where do the stories come from?”, “What are the psychoanalytical lines of inquiry?”, “How did Socialist and Communist regimes interpret them?”, etc. They will be going out on Radio 4 from December 17-28 2012.

An abhorrent rush, a fate that may twist,

Follow the work of Marina Warner at

Again, the ticking starts -

Happy ever afters and good will, We beg the answer Desperately question, may it always, come to this.

Friday 9th November 2012



Sweet Tooth by Ian McEwan Words by Tim Andrews "My needs were simple,” Serena Frome (“rhymes with plume”) claims in the opening chapter of Sweet Tooth. “I didn't bother much with fine descriptions of weather, landscapes and interiors. I wanted characters I could believe in, and I wanted to be made curious about what was going to happen to them." I couldn’t agree more! In fact, were I asked to provide a summary of the things that I look for in a book, I would struggle to provide a more succinct one than Serena’s.

Serena is tasked with recruiting promising young author Tom Haley, but when she falls in love, first with his stories and then with him, Serena finds herself in an impossible situation: tell Tom the truth and risk losing him as well as her job, or maintain her cover and live a life of deception?

military intelligence, Sweet Tooth is infused with intrigue from the start. There are shadowy secret service suits, mysterious messages scrawled on scraps of newspaper, and a curiously bloody mattress, but the spy games are more Tinker, Tailor... than Bond: bureaucratic, grey and unglamourous.

As one would expect from a novel that is at least ostensibly about

This is by no means a criticism, however. Set in the early 1970s,

The opening chapter in particular is cracking; all style, charm and pith, and although things begin to drag a little towards the end of the first act, they pick up again with the start of the ‘Sweet Tooth’ mission and the introduction of Tom Haley and his stories, which are all included in Serena’s narration.

But does the latest novel from Man Booker Prize-winner Ian McEwan deliver on what both its narrator and this reviewer are looking for? Told entirely in the first-person, Sweet Tooth is the tale of Serena Frome, a voracious reader of popular novels who, following a damaging affair with a shady older man, starts work for a lowly department of MI5.

From here on in there are so many threads left tantalizingly loose threads that you are desperate to see satisfyingly tied up - that it becomes hard to stop reading. But satisfyingly tie them up McEwan certainly does. In fact, the final chapter is so masterful, so transformative of all that has gone before that almost all of the criticisms I was preparing to level at the novel while reading just melted away. It’s a really terrific denouement, and a terrific novel that comes highly recommended.

As a woman in an institutionally patriarchal organization Serena’s prospects seem limited, until she is enlisted to work on the ‘Sweet Tooth’ project: an MI5-funded literary foundation with the aim of promoting authors who share similar values to those of the intelligence services.

Grimm Tales For Young And Old by Philip Pullman Words by Stephanie Savva The new English version of the Grimm Tales by Philip Pullman has arrived just in time to make it in any book or fairytale lover’s Christmas list. The writer is famous for his economic and clear narrative style, as well as his association with the magical realm. Pullman is also one of the few contemporary writers who have succeeded in writing cross-generational fiction. For this collection the writer has chosen to re-tell fifty of the original Grimm stories. Of course, if one takes into consideration the fact that the Grimm brothers recorded more than two-hundred stories, there is a big chance that some of your personal favorites might have been left out. Pullman’s selection has a wide range and he manages to effectively embrace a number of stories. In his introduction to the book,

a bleak time of political and social upheaval, Sweet Tooth is very much a period piece. It is littered with nicely observed period details and the decidedly low-key intelligence service only adds to its verisimilitude. Of course, as the introduction to this review suggests, Sweet Tooth isn’t actually a novel about spying at all. It’s really a novel about reading, a novel about the trust we place in authors and the truths they extract from their stories, and though I like spying, Sweet Tooth is all the better for this slight bait and switch.

Pullman recounts the oral tradition from which these stories originated, but unlike others before him, he looks at the subject from a writer’s point of view. In doing so he urges us to respect these stories without worshiping them, adding that,‘telling these stories is a delight, it would be a pity to spoil by anxiety.’ The anxiety he is talking about is the worrying of inventing. Pullman puts his theory in practice very successfully, adapting the tales to his audience, thus making the narrative stronger. A great example of that is his version of Cinderella, where Pullman develops the simple descriptions given by the Grimm borthers, going a step further and describing her gown as the colors of starlight, moonlight and sunlight. He adds to the magical feel of the story, while managing to reduce the passivity of Cinderella’s character. Other notable components of his re-telling are the poems and jingles. His free versions, unlike the close translations read as very authentic and fun. His writing voice comes across clearly; one can easily identify that the stories are written by Pullman. Even though he praises

the Grimm brothers for choosing a very general tone for the tales and agrees with the economy of their writing, he adds a lot of details. Following every story, Pullman provides the reader with a short commentary containing details concerning the origins of the story as well as the main themes. The collection is great for anyone who has a general interest in fairytales. However, for those

who have researched them or studied them a lot it might appear slightly shallow, especially when compared to Angela Carter’s versions. I would say that the book would certainly make a good read for someone new to fairytales, who is interested in learning more about their origins. But, if you are looking for a complete collection, Jack Zipes’s The Complete Fairy Tales might be a better option.






1. Freedom (7) 5. Berate (5) 8. Rhinal (5) 9. Amazing (7) 10. Impassive (7) 11. Tendency (5) 12. Fruit (6) 14. Loved (6) 17. Banquet (5) 19. Gossip (7) 22. Embrocations (7) 23. Entomb (5) 24. Arrows (5) 25. Mariners (7)

1. Golf course (5) 2. Woodwind instrument (7) 3. Object surviving the past (5) 4. Annual (6) 5. Perfumed (7) 6. Earth's protective layer (5) 7. Feared (7) 12. Perplexed (7) 13. Countries (7) 15. Rice dish (7) 16. Dissertation (6) 18. Change (5) 20. Legal excuse (5) 21. Tall tales (5)

'The Designer Quote:

Life is but a chance to fulfil your ambitions. Response from Editor: "Are you dying, Ali?"

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Sudoku Medium


Riddle of the Fortnight I have holes in my top and bottom, my left and right, and in the middle. But I still hold water. What am I?

All solutions will be available in the next issue of The Rabbit

Friday 9th November 2012

Answers Last week's solutions Medium


Riddle of the Fortnight What goes around the world but stays in a corner? – A Stamp



The beginning of my own collection Words by Lewis Butler Hello everybody,

The arts section is now up and running again. If you would like to write for this section please email, feel free to email and ask anything you wish about this section. For regular updates click ‘Like’ in the Facebook page too at https://www.facebook. com/TheRabbitArts. Now to move on to a mystery which is enshrouding a recent purchase of mine. Having had a somewhat eventful and cultural summer, one in which I was lucky enough to see Klimt’s Beethoven frieze up close and personal, I felt

enthused to begin to address my own passions - Art. My house seemed a little empty, though I have prints and posters of cult classic horror and Bruce Lee movies displayed, there wasn’t anything particularly... framed. Then one day passing a shop in Colchester, a particular painting grabbed my friend’s eye. It was a painting of a woman in what seems to be Japanese traditional dress, it bears no title, or certificate and such, just a signature in the bottom right corner: “Parkes ’91”. Of course being a man of culture - of sorts - he snapped up the panting, much to my despair. Yet underneath some pictures of trains, there lay another Parkes - I of course bought this one. Now every day I wake up, make some breakfast and look at the painting I bought for £2.99 hanging in the front room of my


house. It makes breakfast seem a little classier and puts a smile on my face. There is no regret in the purchase and a genuine feeling of joy at owning a piece of art, even though it is not exactly a masterpiece. I know nothing of the artist, the subject or even the painting. I know of a Michael Parkes, who is a really good artist, but my painting is definitely not by him. I’m using my detective skills to find the artist of the piece which is so far the actual only piece in my soon to be booming collection. Where, oh where did this painting come from? If anyone knows anything about the picture, please do get in contact with me. Don’t forget to check the blog, http://therabbitarts.wordpress. com. There is extra content and full articles ready to read there.

We Need a Pop Art Revival Words by Tom Meakins Let’s face it, visual art has diminished over the years, especially in this post (post)modern age; perhaps not in terms of quality but at the very least, the active support and admiration towards it. Today, we are surrounded by philistines who have no idea what Art is, and who are driven by commercial mediums and mainstream work. I have a suggestion which would promote visual art again and consequently, would yield a greater appreciation of it. In the 1960’s we had a form of Art that became prominent, something we now know as Pop Art. Individuals like Andy Warhol and Roy Lichtenstein were producing such work, and

FAT @ Lakeside Theatre Words by Camela Cuison “Art is universal,” the art crictic, James Jackson Jarves once said. With this in mind, this play about the pursuit of love is as universal as they come. FAT follows the story of Pete Edwards who is looking for love along London’s Southbank. Played out in front of ethereal projections of London and intertwined with some of the most surreal sequences I have ever seen, the story seems timeless enough. But does it need to be mentioned that our beloved protagonist is gay and suffers from cerebral palsy? The play does not focus on Pete’s disability but rather on a pursuit for happiness (which for him seems to reside in a fat man, a

bottle of coke and whole lot of spaghetti). When talking to Pete after the show, one of the things that struck me is that he did not refer to his speech impediment as such. Instead he referred to it as another ‘speech pattern’. No more different than sign language or a Scottish dialect, “I do not feel there’s a point in talking about it [his disability] on stage. . . The focus is not on the disability.” Yet it is present on stage, there are subtitles, audio descriptions and a sign language interpreter on stage; while Pete’s own disability is not mentioned, the play’s accessibility to all those with disabilities is never forgotten. After this summer of incredible Paralympic achievement, (London can proudly state that this year’s Paralympics was part of the most successful Olympic games to

creating a surge of interest in the Art. British critic Lawrence Alloway first coined the term ‘pop art’ in 1954, as a convenient label for the popular art being created by admass culture. The bohemian lifestyles and entourage that surrounded them, including Warhol’s infamous factory workhouse, heightened the social status of art. However, it was the subject matter and use of techniques to depict it that triggered this rise in interest. Pop Art refers to the imagery which the majority can relate to; often through the terms of contemporary, mass consumerculture. For example, Lichtenstein is renowned for parodying and stereotyping the comic strips and their characters which influenced America at the time. However, there are also satirical undertones behind Pop Art, for example Warhol’s famous Brillo Pads was a social commentary on the date), I asked whether or not the awareness that this summer’s games gave the world had any effect upon him and his own project. Was the play at its most relevant? Pete responded that he had been doing it for far longer; while the accomplishments of the Paralympic team dominated this summer’s news, the genesis of FAT began several years prior. I was surprised that there wasn’t a warmer response to the mention of the Paralympics and yet although surprising, in hindsight perfectly understandable. We don’t compare the accomplishments of the English Cricket Team alongside the most recent adaptation of “Twelfth Night” simply because they are both British Productions. If the whole message of this summer was for equality, surely

ephemera of every-day life in a mass-produced, consumer world. Pop Art is fun and memorable; it reminds us of objects which have lost their visual recognition through constant exposure. One of the most famous works of Art in modern times is Warhol’s silkscreen of Marilyn Monroe, in which the striking feminine colours accentuate the actress’s visage. I honestly feel that if there was a Pop Art revival today, visual art could certainly gain more of a reputation and be on par- in terms of recognition and celebration with other artistic mediums. There are already similar forms of pop art such as the website 9GAG. However, if time was taken to create bigger masterpieces that are visually more striking and represent our age through subjects and themes that today’s audience can relate to, it would induce new appreciation of Art.

then it would be nonsensical to compare the world of sport and art simply because disability is the common factor? While the surreal segments of the show may have left me slightly at loss, there is absolutely no doubting Pete’s creative vocational calling. Can you really doubt the imagination of a man that can dream up a world that is taken over by cats, where women became slaves and must bathe their hair in chocolate? When I was asked whether or not I liked the play it seemed my own opinion didn’t matter, Pete already had a ballsy enough rebuttal: he simply didn’t care. The sheer audacity of Pete colours all aspects of the play, and gives it the back bone to deal with such hard hitting issues.

SCIENCE Words from the Editor

In this issue of the Rabbit science, we discuss the issue of ‘Food Security’. With threats such as

Friday 9th November 2012

are we doing to help those most at need? We also look at the darker side of food from counterfeit products

Physiologist, Sciences

My own research focuses on

Plenty More Fish In The Sea? Words by Laura Bretherton Do you know where the fish from your local chippie comes from? The ocean may seem like a bountiful supply of food, but unsustainable fishing practises and poor management have left most of the world’s fish stocks in a critical state, and the UK is no different. A recent study into historical records has revealed that since we started fishing on an industrial scale 120

the traits and responses of very small pores on the surface of the leaf called stomata. These pores allow the influx of carbon dioxide into the leaf, the gas required for photosynthesis, arguably the most essential

biological process for life on earth.

years ago, our major fish stocks have shrunk by a staggering 94%.

that all of the world’s fish stocks will collapse by the year 2050.

Fishing is an important industry in the UK, with the British fishing fleet responsible for landing around 600,000 tonnes of fish per year. Unfortunately, many fishing methods result in by-catch (netting unintended species) or directly cause physical damage to the environment. Annual quotas have been implemented to minimise overfishing, but many often take much more than they should, and some of the quotas still don’t allow stocks to recover. Currently, many fisheries scientists predict

If you are wondering what you can do, the easiest place to start is by changing your eating habits. Consult the Good Fish Guide for what you should eat (sourced from sustainable fisheries), or

Whilst open for gas exchange, stomata leave plants susceptible to water loss. These guys are essential in the global water cycle with almost 35 billion

Intermittent Fasting – The fad diet to end all fad diets Words by Sotiris Kakanos We can all get disillusioned with what’s right and what’s not when it comes to our diet. Countless health documentaries on television, endless articles in newspapers; the media really has a knack on how to confuse us all. Though, there’s that one rule that nobody dares seem to question: ‘do not skip breakfast’. That was until intermittent fasting came along. IF programmes all share one common concept: alternating between fasting and nonfasting periods. A fasting period Did you know...


to ridiculous laws, how are we attempting to secure our food culture.

tonnes of water per year passing through them in the tropics alone. However, some stomata loose water a lot faster than others, potentially reducing crop yields. With our planet’s population exploding at an unprecedented rate, this has severe global implications for food security.

Words by Lorna McAusland,

Here at the University of Essex, a team of scientists are working on a variety of different techniques to help improve our food security. Research spans the manipulation and understanding of photosynthetic processes to produce higher yields, to understanding what physiological traits make a plant a better crop.


Research In Focus - More crop per drop Stomatal Biological


F a c e b o o k : TheRabbitScience Twitter: @SciRabbit Blog: rabbitscience.

famine, disease and climate change placing feelings of impending doom on our planets resources, what

•The State of New York has banned donating food to the homeless as it states ‘the city can’t assess their salt, fat and fibre content’.


My own current research revolves around developing a system which allows us to identify plants with more responsive stomata. This will allow us to rapidly screen plants for improved water use efficiency in both natural and genetically modified individuals. Enabling us to make decisions to optimise drought resistance and food production, essential for areas of the world where starvation and famine are currently significant threats. what to avoid (overfished or results in high by-catch). Changing the habits of both supplier and consumer are required to solve this problem. Sadly, if we do not make this change soon, we are destined to learn this lesson the way our species has countless times already: when it is too late.

Knock-off Britain! Are You Eating the Real Deal? Words by Sarah-Jane Walsh We’ve all heard of counterfeit handbags and designer ‘get-up’. But, did you know that the food we eat might also be classed as counterfeit? ‘Counterfeit food?’ I hear you cry, ‘like the plastic fruit my nan has in her fruit bowl?’ No, this is real food, but counterfeit branding. Prestigious products have earned a reputation for good quality such as Parma Ham, Kobe beef and Hennessey cognac. Foodfraudsters are exploiting this market demand and producing low cost, cut quality products and trying to pass them as the real deal. However food fraud is not always as obvious as a cheap knock-off product. Mislabelling is also a serious issue even here in the UK. Food authorities try to create guidelines and laws to ensure that we as consumers are not misled. However that does not stop producers from using clever marketing, using logos such as ‘Farmhouse foods’ and ‘Grandmas Recipe’. This manipulates us as a consumer in to thinking the food is of a high standard when actually imported from a factory in Asia.

will typically involve consuming nothing but water, and depending on the program, can be maintained from 16 hours to up to 36. It seems extreme but we all fast to some degree. A healthy individual that sleeps 6-8 hours a night is fasting, until they wake and eat their morning meal aptly named ‘breakfast’. Studies have linked the IF diet method to a variety of potential positive outcomes. From increasing life span to decreasing the risk of heart disease and of course its weight loss potential. Like a lot of fad diets, IF is snowballing in online popularity. For me, it’s a tried and tested method and if you’re sick of the conventional weight loss/ muscle gain methods, look it up. Scrapping breakfast might be the best thing you’ll ever do.

•It’s illegal to serve ketchup in a primary school in France! Apparently it’s a cultural threat to traditional French cooking.

•The Indian delight and innocent ‘Samosa’ has been banned from Somalia after the country's alShabaab group deemed them ‘offensive’ and ‘too Christian’.



A Brief History of Guy Fawkes Night Words by Sadie Lummis ‘Remember, remember the fifth of November: Gunpowder, treason and plot. We see no reason, why gunpowder treason, should ever be forgot…’ One of Britain’s best known traditions is that of Bonfire Night. November the 5 sees the coming of fireworks displays all over the country. Adults and children alike will be partaking in the splendour of; skyrockets, sparklers and Catherine wheels. However this explosive celebration is steeped in such fantastic British history that is often overlooked in favour

Happiness May be Closer Than We Think Words by Luci Rafferty A few months ago, I watched a video on YouTube entitled ‘The Secrets of Truly Happy People’ by Bubzbeauty. Bbest known as a makeup guru but also known for making inspirational videos. It really left me with a few things to think about and raised some very interesting points that I’d like to share with you. We all seem to be searching for

of its more festive exertions. Such a history indeed that explains the intriguing rhyme above, here follows a brief history of November the 5, more commonly known as ‘Guy Fawkes Night.’ In the year 1605, an underground Catholic group was established with intentions to destroy the Houses of Parliament in London. Led by Robert Catesby, the group planned to assassinate the protestant king, James I. He was a serious persecutor of the Catholic faith, and Catesby wanted to replace him with his daughter, Elizabeth, then third in line to the throne. Among the men involved was Guy Fawkes. Fawkes was born and educated in York; a military man, he had fought in The Eighty Years War between Catholic Spain and the Dutch Republic. It was in 1604

happiness. Generally when you ask people what they most want in life one of the main answers is ‘to be happy’. And so, as I was watching this I found that the part that struck me the most was the attitude that I believe we can all easily identify with – the “I’ll be happy when…” attitude. For example “I’ll be happy when I get my dream job”. As a result, this leaves us with a slight danger of forgetting about the present and living/anticipating too much for the future. That point in particular made me think: life really is short, and so living for the moment is important. Life is a continual process and we are unable to relive days that have already passed. That may sound a bit morbid I

that he first became involved with the ‘Gunpowder Plot’. He was loyal, intellectual and highly skilled in warfare. He was also fatefully chosen to guard the stockpiles of gun powder beneath the House of Lords. It was originally proposed that a tunnel should be dug. Starting from from the cellar of a house in London, belonging to The Keeper of the King’s Wardrobe (and where Fawkes had been installed as care taker), to the parliamentary houses. This was in order to access it’s chambers, but the process of digging was slow. So copious amounts of gun powder were transported across the Thames River by night and hidden beneath the property. On the night of November the 5th, when the King and his parliamentary members were assembled for

know, but true. Another point that is covered, is how some let the past latch onto them into the present which causes unhappiness. It can be very easy to fall into that trap. While many of us can identify with have the past affect our present, in the grand scheme of things it does not seem worth it.. It is a mind over matter situation. We have to decide whether we will be dominated by our cynical nature thoughts that may not even be right. To quote directly from the video,”even if you’ve had a bad beginning, it doesn’t mean that you can’t have a good finish.”



the opening of parliament, the barrels would be ignited.

all were condemned to a death ‘unworthy of either heaven or earth’.

With the gun powder secured, the conspirators continued with their treasonous plans. Even after they were made aware of an anonymous letter, warning Lord Monteagle, not to attend The Houses; it was believed to be a hoax. When the letter was shown to the King however, the cellars were searched. Guy Fawkes was found shortly after midnight along with multiple barrels of explosives, concealed beneath piles of coal and firewood. Under the pseudonym John Johnson, Fawkes was immediately arrested and interrogated leading to him admitting his intentions and his regret at having failed them. Questioned further and tortured, he eventually revealed himself and the names of his co-conspirators;

The eight plotters were brought to execution on January 31st. They would be hanged and then dismembered for the crows to eat. Awaiting his death and aware of the mutilation that would follow Guy Fawkes jumped from the scaffold and broke his neck to avoid such humiliation. However his body was still quartered and displayed in each corner of the kingdom as warning to other would-be traitors. In the following years, November the 5 was declared ‘Bonfire Night’ and a celebration of the King’s escape from the Gun Powder Plot. Traditionally, an effigy of Fawkes is burned each year, accompanying the fireworks that we so delight in to this day.

Friday 9th November 2012

Voyage to Vietnam Words by Kerri Butcher

It is hard to put Vietnam’s beauty into words. The inspiration for visiting this breath taking country was Top Gear. . For those of you who don’t know, Jeremy & Co set off from Ho Chi Minh with 15 million Vietnamese đồng on motorbikes.They reached Ha Long in eight days, scaling the length of the country. I made it my goal to do just this (except in reverse). Vietnam is relatively untouched. It is of course geared up for tourists, but it is yet to become completely westernised. It is one of those countries that you should visit sooner rather than later. We began our journey in Hanoi, Vietnam’s capital.

Tip number one; don’t get a taxi, take a bike.

make a living by selling fish to the ships passing by; incredible.

So from then on that’s just what we did. It seemed like people were carrying their life’s worth on their bike. To hire a driver will cost you very little and it is certainly the quickest and easiest mode of transport. You will find that most things in Vietnam are cheap, although 33,000 Dong sounds like a lot - it’s only £1.. You can have a good meal out and it will cost you no more than £3.

After Ha Long we stayed in a stilt house, in a tropical rainforest. Now, if you like poisonous bugs, praying mantises and tree snakes, then this is the perfect place for you. However, we were told that a man had recently been eaten by a cobra; we swiftly moved on. We made our way further south venturing to Hue. This was my favourite city; so much history to it. It is home to the Citadel and we visited ruins, waterfalls and monuments galore.

Tip number two; make sure you take Dollars with you – you can get more for your money. From Hanoi we headed out to Ha Long Bay, where we took a cruise. We weaved around the 2000 half a billion year old limestone islets; there were stunning views and the opportunity to visit the floating villages. The people on these villages have never left and they

The best part of the trip was the journey by motorbike from Hue to Da Nang. We travelled up through the mountains in the blaring sun, with a view back down to the city and beaches; it was breath-taking. As we reached the high point of our journey, we could see both cities from the top; this is where I fell in love with Vietnam. We

were told that the only way to truly do Vietnam is on a bike:this confirmed it. A trip to Vietnam doesn’t have to be all culture. There are plenty of white sandy beaches to catch a tan on. Try China Beach, or if you are looking for something more secluded just down the road is Hoi An. Tip number three; tailor made clothes are a good idea. Whilst in Hoi An, we decided to give the tailor made clothes a shot. The process consisted of me logging onto the Topshop website, pointing out what I wanted, and them making it for about a third of the price. Make sure you haggle on the price, it’s always negotiable everywhere you go. Tip number four; don’t book anything until you get there. (Except maybe hotels)


Prices are always negotiable and you can always get a cheaper rate in person upon arrival, so don’t panic, those excursions will wait for you. Note: One excursion not to miss is a day trip to the Cu chi tunnels - the underground tunnel network from the war. A good history lesson and very hands on as you will find yourself attempting to crawl through tunnels that were not built for Western giants. The journey ended up in Ho Chi Minh which was a sad moment. I had found a country of beauty and tranquillity and we had some truly amazing experiences. I did not want to leave. Go before everything changes, because it is developing fast. And when you do, make sure you see it all, because there is not a bad part on offer. For the cheapest flights visit

Getting Involved Words by Abigail Moore This being my final year I have tried to get more involved at Essex.. The things I have tried are; poker, Theatre Arts Society (TAS) and ultimate frisbee. Here's my perspective so far: I am really enjoying TAS, so far and have already signed myself up and started rehearsals for the pantomime. 'Sleeping Bootay' is showing in the lakeside theatre on the 11, 12 and 13 of December. Please come along. They're a really funny friendly group and joining is perfect for die hard drama fans as well as complete beginners who will benefit from the confidence boost drama brings. For only £5 you

are a part of TAS, can be casted for the pantomime and attend weekly drama workshops on Thursdays at 5pm. Definitely worth a try.

Homemade Toffee Apples

Frisbee is a sport that most people haven't been brought up on so they're totally prepared to teach all the basics. If you're a bit intimidated by some of the more serious sports, frisbee is the one for you. It has a chilled out atmosphere on and off the pitch. Their Wednesday sessions are really fun and welcoming and are relaxed about attendance if you play a second sport. I also tried the poker society. The first thing I noticed was that I was the only girl, the second was that it was at a much higher level than I was expecting! It’s a good society for a decent level player, but be prepared to get serious.

Recipe by Michelle Kitsell These delicious treats are a British tradition for accompanying Bonfire Night. Crunching through these sweet delights on a crisp autumnal evening makes watching fireworks all the more enjoyable! You will need: 8 x Granny Smith apples 400g caster sugar (golden if you can get it) 1 tsp vinegar 4 tbsp golden syrup 8 x Lolly Sticks Method:

Time Flies When You’re Having Fun… and Other Things! Words by Luci Rafferty Time is a funny thing, it goes so quickly and yet so much can happen. This is how I feel reflecting on my first year of Uni. Honestly, reading all about Fresher’s Week a few weeks ago felt a little bit surreal because it really doesn’t feel all that long ago since it was just dawning on me that I was soon to be arriving at University of Essex. Being at Essex has taught me that it is not just about the degree you’re studying for. Don’t get me wrong, it’s the centre of why we are all here. However, there is definitely a lifestyle element where you learn a great deal outside of the classroom. One thing that stood out the less than stellar bus service that Colchester is blessed with. I also found that I learned a lot about living more independently in many more ways than I initially anticipated.

For instance a year ago the thought of going around on the tube alone sounded like a terrifying concept. Now I have an Oyster card and travel to Essex through London, no longer looking like a confused tourist. Consequently, I now possess a rough idea of where most of the areas in London are, as well as getting to know Colchester of course. I remember venturing out into Colchester town centre for the first time and likening it to a maze. Despite coming from a big city myself, I had never moved house so even just living in a town like Colchester was going to feel strange to begin with. - I am sure a lot of Freshers’ are feeling the same now, but it becomes a second home soon enough. It’s just amazing that all of these memories are from last year. I have gained more knowledge of how to live independently, how to travel and more recently paying bills and rent. Going down to campus on arrivals day also served as a reminder of times moving on. To any Fresher who may be reading this, I really hope that you are enjoying it here so far and be prepared to be surprised by how quickly the time goes! Make sure you appreciate it!

Get in Touch Don’t forget to join our Facebook group ‘The Rabbit: Lifestyle:2012/2013’. You can also follow us on Twitter@rabbitlifestyle. And you can also now read the latest articles on our blog:

1. Place the apples in a large bowl and then cover with boiling water (you may have to do this in 2 batches). This will remove the waxy coating and help the caramel to stick. Dry thoroughly and twist off any stalks. Push a lolly stick into the stalk end of each apple. 2. Lay out a sheet of baking parchment and place the apples on this, close to your stovetop. Tip the sugar into a pan along with 100ml of water and set over a medium heat. Cook for 5 mins until the sugar dissolves, then stir in the vinegar and syrup. Set a sugar thermometer in the pan and boil to 140C or 'hard crack' stage. If you don't have a thermometer you can test the toffee by pouring a little into a bowl of cold water. It should harden instantly and, when removed, be brittle and easy to break. If you can still squish the toffee, continue to boil it. 3. Working quickly and carefully, dip and twist each apple in the hot toffee until covered, let any excess drip away, then place on the baking parchment to harden. You may have to heat the toffee a little if the temperature drops and it starts to feel thick. Leave the toffee to cool before eating. Can be made up to 2 days in advance, stored in a dry place.


Words by Forest Morgan

I recently went to a fortnightly Cheese & Wine society event and thoroughly enjoyed myself. I have also been invited to a selection of events which will occur over

Cheese & Wine Society Visit Words by Forest Morgan My first society visit was a daunting yet exciting prospect and by the end of it, it had thankfully turned into the latter. The Cheese and Wine society was the first society I would review and joined them on at 7pm on Tuesday evening 30 November. The society meets up fortnightly in the Hexagon building near the laundrette.. On entering the room all members were checked off a list, paid their five pounds in order to drink and eat cheese to their hearts content and then were given an empty glass. The empty glass soon became full with the first of the white wines. The team was split into two; Charlie, the treasurer, took one and Becky, the president, took the other. They proceeded to teach each group the correct way to taste wine in the proper fashion. They were very professional in their teaching ablility; we later learned from our interview they had both attended a training course. Members said how the first wine tasted grassy which did not seem to deter the group for drinking more of it. I learnt that by tilting the glass and looking at both the inner and outer edges of the wine you can tell the wines age. I agreed with Charlie that it was a bland white wine, one of those ‘cheaper’ tasting wines which according to the members the first had not

Friday 9th November 2012


the next month. You can find my experience of the Cheese and Wine society event on this page and in next week’s issue you will find my experiences with the Mario Kart society – Which I am very much looking forward to it.

Do bare in mind that if your society has not got in touch with me regarding a review you still have time do so and can get in touch with me personally via my email (

The Societies Guild Meeting took place and I am pleased to welcome the new societies into the guild. Remember, if you want to join there are over 100 to choose from just head over to EssexStudent (, and

check them out.

tasted like. However, it was to be the Bellingham’s Mocha Java Merlot wine which was to be the hit of the evening.This wine had an after taste of coffee. Some members could not taste it but I was happy to be one of the few who did, and it was pleasant. After each member has tasted the individual wine, they are able to rate it on sheets provided from the beginning of the session. By this point of the night I decided to talk to a few members and ask them a few questions. I spoke to Daniel Hutchinson and asked him “Why did you decide to join the society?” He replied: “I’ve been bought up in a family that often eats cheese and drinks wine. I wanted to extend my wealth of knowledge within the field of wine and cheese in acquired and civilised company. “

your favourite doesn’t disappear.

level we are happy.” When I asked the committee how they would sum up the society, it was hard for them to think of something concise, so they eventually went for: “A society which is fun, different and a great way to socialise with people.”

in conversation with lots of the members. It’s a great society with an executive committee who aren’t just there to eat cheese and drink wine but to also teach, guide and get to know their members.

I then asked Harry Stevens, a committed member of the society the same question and was given the following answer: “I didn’t know anything about cheese and wine besides what people pretend to know!” Now it was the turn of the cheese element to the night’s proceedings; I have to admit I was an upset man as there was no Brie. However, Becky (the president) assured me that Brie ‘night’ would be soon and that if I became a member I could enjoy as much of it as I wished. There was a selection of five cheeses, one of these being the iconic Cheddar. The cheese went quickly so I would say to anyone who has not been before who wants to, be the first couple of members in the queue to ensure

I asked Becky why she decided to make the society, she said: “My best mate goes to Durham University and they have a Cheese and Wine society there and it was a success, so I thought why not bring it here?” Charlie commented with: “We just want to keep it going, especially as it’s a new society. As long as our members are consistently at a good

That is exactly how I felt the evening was; definitely fun, different in regards to what other societies we have at the moment and I engaged

Lastly, the Winter Fayre will be making its way on campus the last day of November. Experience the season as it is in a variety of cultures, information coming soon.

To sign up to the society, go to activities/societies/list/activities/ cheeseandwine/.


Classes And Lectures To Be Cancelled On Derby Day?

Words by Paul Seery

Evolve Gym: Getting ripped or ripped off?

access to the gym and pays per use of the facilities, including the swimming pool.

Words by Fred Forster The £1.4 million gym at the University Of Essex was built in 2006 and has been insuring the fitness of students ever since. For £170 for the top Gold Passport package a student gets access to the main gym, indoor facilities such as squash courts and a climbing wall, various classes and outdoor tennis courts. But how does this compare to other University gyms? At Loughborough University the annual fee is £199, which includes access to a swimming pool and extensive facilities including twelve Olympic Weight-Lifting Platforms – though this does include the use of outdoor facilities as the Essex membership does. The University Of East Anglia operates a complex system designed to encourage both nonstudents and students to join and make use of the facilities. To put it simply, every student gets free

Essex Continue Rugby Union Winning Run University of Essex First XV: 22 Kings College London First XV: 10 Words by Paul Seery University Of Essex’s Men’s Rugby Union First team continued their push up the Southern Eastern 2B table with a convincing defeat over King’s College London (KCL). Both sides were confident going in to the game. Essex went into the match off the back of a 21-12 away win against the University of Hertfordshire while KCL were three points ahead of Essex in the league table. Essex made the better start, holding on to the majority of the possession inside the KCL half. The first points of the match were subsequently scored by Essex through a penalty kick from their number 10. KCL’s responsed with a strong spell of possession inside the Essex half.

The first general meeting of the Sports Federation took place on 30th October 2012 and was well attended with representatives from over forty sports clubs present.

Evolve gives students the choice of two other packages alongside the Gold option which is the most highly priced. A Silver Passport To Sport grants use of facilities in designated off-peak hours for £135 while the Bronze option, at £60 a year, caters for students whose main aims are to play in student sports teams. Bronze members then get 25% off gym classes and other charges. The student prices offer a large discount on the public rates but other options in the area should not be discounted. 'The Gym' in Colchester town centre costs £15.99 a month with a joining fee of £20, NUS discounts are also available. With 170 separate stations and machines and classes which run all day, this 24-hour gym is a reasonable option for fitness fanatics. The question still needs to be answered as to whether Evolve is good value as a student gym, also is it right that to represent our university we have to join it?

KCL’s opening points came in the form of a try, followed up a successful conversion. Essex managed some good attacking play in response but failed to capitalise upon this. In the closing stages of the first half, KCL came close to scoring their second try but were ultimately unsuccessful. However they were awarded a penalty kick soon afterwards, putting them 10-3 up. Essex began the second half as the stronger side. Their solid start was soon rewarded with their first try of the match, quickly followed by their second try of the match from Ashley Clarke-Walking. This try was followed up with their first successful conversion of the match, making the score15-10 to Essex before Clarke-Walking scored his second try and Banes managed a successful conversion to add seven points to Essex’s lead. Disappointingly, Essex then missed the chance to go further in front, when a penalty kick was not converted. The win for Essex means that they now climb up to fourth in the table, level on points with both KCL and UCL. Essex are now only 3 points behind the joint division leaders.

Sports EDITOR: Fred Forster

There were a number of items on the agenda including sports centre membership, club discipline systems, charity fundraising and the election of new Events and Intramural Officer, Jodie Goldsmith.

However the hot topic for discussion was next year’s Derby Day competition. Next year’s derby Day takes place at UEA’s Norwich campus on 13 March 2013, there are currently talks about the possible cancellations of classes,

labs, lectures and seminars on that day so that students can travel and support our sports teams. The next general meeting will take place on 11 December 2012.

Friday 9th November 2012

Netball Second VII Still Searching For A Win Kings College London Third VII: 26 University Of Essex Second VII: 21 Words by Katie Hall Despite their best efforts the

Netball Second VII sufferened their second defeat in their BUCS campaign in a narrowling fought contest with Kings College London Third VII. In the close contest Essex made constant attacking efforts and dominated the final quarter – but were unable to grab a much needed win. Newcomer Hollie Harris had an amazing début as goal shooter and was named Player Of The Match by the oppostion. Indea Smith-Boora also played well for Essex


demonstrating great movement and shooting. Together the pair formed a promising attacking partnership which should see them maximise goal-scoring chances in upcoming games. Carly Blythe played an outstanding game as goalkeeper, with her snatches and rebounds becoming fundamental for the team who often managed to convert her defence into attacking play. Despite a solid team performance, Essex left things too late and ran out of time to seal a win. 24/10/2012

Upcoming Home Fixtures Wednesday 7 November 2012: Football @ 14.00 University of Essex Men’s First XI


St Mary’s University College Second XI

University of Essex Women’s First XI


Brunel University First XI

Rugby @ 14.00 University of Essex First XV


Middlesex University First XV

Lacrosse @ 14.00 University of Essex Men’s Firsts


Brighton University Firsts

Squash @ 14.15 University of Essex Men’s Firsts


Imperial College London Seconds

University of Essex Women’s Firsts


Roehampton University Firsts

Hockey @ 14.00 University of Essex Women’s Second XI


Roehampton University First XI

Tennis @ 12.00 University of Essex Men’s Firsts


Queen Mary's University Firsts

Tennis @ 15.00 University of Essex Women’s Firsts


v. University Of Hertfordshire Firsts

Women’s Hockey’s Poor Start Continues University Of Essex Women’s First XI: 3 King’s College London Medics First XI: 6 Words by Paul Seery After losing 6-3 at home to King’s College London Medics (KCLM) Essex’s women’s hockey side are left still searching for their first league win of the season. The opening stages of the match saw a very even start between the two teams. However it was the visitors that had the majority of the possession. Both sides did well in their build-up play during the early portions on the match but neither were able to find the allimportant decisive moment inside

the final third. The first chance in the match went to KCLM in the form of a short corner but swift and effective defending from Essex stopped the visitors from going in front. . Essex finally broke through to take the lead in the first half when a short corner into the D found Hannah Phillips who nutmugged the keeper to claim the first goal of the game. KCLM responded soon afterwards with an equaliser, after a one-on-one with the Essex keeper. KCLM did not waste any time and went 2-1 up just a few minutes later. Essex responded with some good forward play and tough tackling inside the KCLM half but could not prevent KCLM from extending their lead to 3-1. A few minutes later Essex came close to clsing the gap when good build up outside the D resulted in an attempt on goal which narrowly went wide of the target. The closing stages of the first half saw Essex have the better share

of the possession, but they were unable to score that important second goal. KCLM resumed play in a positive manner, maintaining most of the possession, including in the Essex half. Essex responded with their second goal of the match from Lucy Asky however they wee unable to build on this and KCLM soon built on their lead taking the score to 5.2 Despite positive play and effort Essex failed to capitalise and found themselves forced into a defensive position. KCLM’s inevitable sixth goal came after a period of constant pressure on the home side. Lucy Asky managed to pull one goal back for Essex taking the result to 6-3. Despite coming close to shortening the visiting team’s lead and improving their goal difference with another shot on goal, it was a case of too little too late for the Women’s First XI side. 24/10/2012


Eight Straight For Men’s Hockey First XI

of tactical changes at halftime. The St Batholomew’s goalkeeper was difficult to get past, denying Henderson a much-needed second goal on a number of occasions. Alex Wareham finally delivered,

converting a pass from James Leebody, chipping the keeper in a skilled and rarely seen piece of play.

intyo a defensive struggle for the final ten minutes. Due to excellent defensive efforts the side managed to hold on to another win.

Essex then went down to ten men and found themselves forced

The Man Of The Match award was shared between second goal scorer

and-twenty points. These tests included a vertical jump test which measures leg power, agility testing, a 20m sprint test and a final Yo-Yo Intermittent Endurance Test.

laboratory. The top-ranked team (with 6+ members competing in the even) won free field testing for their team members at next term’s fitness competition.

Each competitor accumulated points to produce an overall fitness score, with the individual male and female winners receiving a laboratory fitness test with the Human Performance Unit in our state of the art sport science

In the men’s event 100m sprinter, Isear Ade-Odonlado (Athletics) produced a total score of 374 to beat Ross Tyrell (unattached) on 340 points and Chris Palmer (American Football) on 314 points. 400m runner Lauren Longhurst

Alex Wareham and Fred Forster, despite the fact he had been sent off. This second BUCs win takes Essex to a comfortable spot near the top of the table, which sees the top three teams all on six points.

University Of Essex: 2 St Bartholomew's: 0 Words by Fred Forster The University Of Essex Men's Hockey First XI celebrated their eighth consecutive game without loss against St Bartholomew’s side last week. Essex travelled to Redbridge, London with a vastly reduced squad, lacking both centre backs, a right half and a forward. However after commendable efforts from captain Dave Henderson, the team managed to pull together a squad for the away match. The first goal was slow to arrive, despite numerous chances Essex failed to yield results. After winning several short corners, one was finally converted by vicecaptain Jason Wilkins, meaning Essex held a narrow one goal going into halftime. The Blades knew another goal was needed and made a number

Revealed: The fittest sports people at the University of Essex

During this year’s Freshers’ Fair you may have seen the Human Performance Unit stand on Square 4 where students from a variety of clubs and societies could sign up to compete in the first of a series of fitness competitions aiming to find the University of Essex’s fittest athlete.

Words by Peter Bonner

Each student completed a series of fitness tests with each test carrying a maximum of one-hundred-

POSITION 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17

NAME Isear Ade-Odonlado Ross Tyrrell Chris Palmer Nick Strong Charles Mulvihill Jamie Griffiths Paul Lamurean Lauren Longhurst Jake Hawkins Sam Goodman Mateusz Zabicli Roberto Sanha Charlotte Hughes Phillip Cassor Ashley Rennalls Yusuy Khan Olimieu Rahman

CLUB/SOCIETY Athletics Unattached American Football American Football American Football American Football American Football Athletics American Football American Football Handball American Football Athletics American Football American Football Unattached American Football

TOTAL SCORE 374 340 314 310 283 275 265 259 252 249 248 240 231 227 211 185 150

(Athletics) was first in the women’s competition on 259 points, with Charlotte Hughes (Athletics) second on 231 points. Despite Athletics Club’s domination of the individual standings, it was the University of Essex American Football Team that took the team prize with a mean team score of 283. Club captains can contact 'hpu@' to book their team in for next term’s fitness competition.

Friday 9th November 2012



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First Win For RUFC University Of Essex RUFC XV: 21 University of Hertfordshire RUFC: 12 Words by Christopher Webb After last year’s unbeaten season, newly promoted University Of Essex RUFC First team faced a tough start to what will be a challenging season in a difficult and highly competitive league.

try, foraying deep into the Hertfordshire half in a number of attacking plays. Disappointingly a lack of composure meant Essex failed to score a much-needed try, a problem which has been evident in the team throughout the start of the season.

Once again Essex rallied well and after a Hertfordshire player was sin-binned for a dangerous tackle, Jack Allchurch ran on the outside of the defence to score a try in the corner, with Baynes once again converting to make the score 1412.

While their attack was somewhat lacking, Essex’s defence stood strong and Hertfordshire failed to threaten Essex’s try line again, meaning the remaining minutes of the first half played out to a stalemate.

By this point, Essex were in the driving seat as they pushed for their first win of the season. Further sustained pressure saw an excellent move squandered as Robert Ellis made it over the try line, but despite no pressure from Hertfordshire’s defence, he dropped the ball.

The second half saw Essex in the ascendency with a good forward move leading to a penalty. Rob Baynes kicked to the corner, and the ensuing lineout was driven over by the forward pack, with Rory Lane being the one to touch down. Baynes added the extra two points from the conversion and Essex took the lead.

With both sides struggling to get going this season this away fixture was never going to be easy for Essex who were immediately on the back foot, conceding a sloppy try after some poor defensive coordination on Essex’s part.

Once again however, Essex switched of, and some ill-discipline led to a second Hertfordshire try as one of their forwards crashed over the line after some sustained pressure.

However, this was the wakeup call Essex needed and the team were resurgent following the

This left Hertfordshire just one score behind. Despite this setback, Essex quicly compensated as Ryan Gordon attacked down the wing, and against all odds managed to avoid touch to score a brilliant individual try; Baynes, once again, added the extra two points. With Essex now 21-12 up, and only 10 minutes left on the clock, the game was beyond Hertfordshire’s reach. Essex soaked up some late pressure to seal a first and deserved victory of the season.

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The Rabbit: Issue 135  

University of Essex's Student Publication